#ten kings of the underworld

[alilcherrysramblings]

I dont know if this has already been asked but anyway- Is the Kings of The Underworld the ones who deleted MK's memorys in your Inkbound fanfic?

Because i have been hearing some theories in the general LMK community that, that might also be the case in the real show.

I actually never heard that theory before— now I’ve gotta look for it lol.

Also… ding ding ding! Yup! I knew someone was gonna guess it eventually, especially since I’ve been sorta dropping lil hints—

Now imma go look for that theory

[deadshadowcreature]

More Qiankun Halo 💫

Nezha knows Wukong better than Macaque, which is why he hold no grudges against him when he messed up and I’m all ears for their early brotherly dynamics

I know Nezha didn’t go to Hell when he killed himself but it would be funny if he did in lmk

[triclitch]

Have art dump

Click for better res

[journeytothewestresearch]

Ten Kings of Hell

Those who have read Journey to the West (1592) will know that the Ten Kings of hell appear in chapter three. This is when Monkey's soul is dragged to the underworld, and after causing trouble, he crosses his name out (as well as those of all monkeys) from the ledgers in hell.

Here is a book PDF that discusses the 9th/10th-century scripture that first introduced the Ten Kings.

https://journeytothewestresearch.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/11/Stephen-Teiser-The-Scripture-on-the-Ten-Kings-and-the-Making-of-Purgatory-in-Medieval-Chinese-Buddhism-1994.pdf

[mayra-quijotescx]

Hey writers, if you're worried about narrative flow and fitting every detail into your scenes to make sure they connect to each other, go read Journey to the West through at least chapter 4 and let phrases like "[this] does not concern us for the moment" and "we shall not elaborate here on [that]" set you free.

[ryin-silverfish]

A Guide to the Chinese Underworld (and what it isn't)

As many FSYY and fox posts as there were on my blog, I am actually a huge fan of the Chinese Underworld mythos. Mostly because I was once a morbid little kid that loved reading about the excavations of ancient tombs, and found the statues depicting hellish torture in the Haw Par Villa "super cool".

Apart from the aesthetics, the history of its evolution is also fascinating. Most of us, Chinese or not, only know the most popular version of the Underworld——the "Ten Kings" system, yet that isn't always the case. So today, I'll start off with a short summary of that.

In pre-Qin era, there was already this generic idea of a "Realm of the Dead" called the Yellow Spring, Youdu, or Youming, but we know very little about it.

Then, in the Han dynasty, two ideas start to emerge: 1) the Underworld is a bureaucracy, 2) the God of Mt. Tai ruled over the dead.

This early bureaucracy might not function as an agent of punishment; the main focus was on keeping the dead segregated from the living so they wouldn't bring diseases and misfortune to the latter, as well as using those ghosts to enforce collective punishments upon people for their lineage's wrongdoings while they were still alive.

Post-Han, after Buddhism entered China and took root, its idea of karmic punishments and reincarnation and the figure of King Yama was merged with folk and Daoist ideas of the Underworld bureaucracy, and, came Tang dynasty, resulted in the "Ten Kings" system that first appeared in Dunhuang manuscripts.

It was very rudimentary and far from well-established, as seen in Tang legends, with some adopting the Ten Kings system, some sticking to the Lord of Mt. Tai and some favoring King Yama, and overall little agreements on who's in charge of the Underworld.

But the "Ten Kings" system would become the mainstream version from then onwards, used in Ming vernacular novels and made even more popular by folk religion scrolls like the Jade Records (Yuli Baochao).

As such, most points in the following sections will be based on the fully matured "Ten Kings" system of the Underworld, as seen in the Jade Records and JTTW.

What happens when you die?

(This is a fictionalized walkthrough of the posthumous fate of souls under the "Ten Kings" system. I try to stick to the very broad progression outlined in the Jade Records, but many creative liberties are taken on the details.)

Let's say there's a guy named Xiao Ming, and he had just died of a heart attack. Bummers. What now?

Well, the first thing he saw would be the ghost cops.

There isn't really an unanimous agreement on who these ghost cops are: they may be a pair of ghosts in white and black robes, wearing tall hats (Heibai Wuchang), they may have the heads of farm animals (Ox-Head and Horse-Face), or they can just be generic ghost bureaucrats. For convenience's sake, let's say it was the first scenario.

"Who are you guys and where are you taking me?"

"Glad you asked!" The taller ghost cop, being the cheerful one of the pair, replied. It wasn't very reassuring, considering that his tongue was dangling out of his mouth way further than it should. "I'm the White Impermanence, my sour-looking colleague here is the Black Impermanence, and we are taking you to the City God's office."

This City God, a.k.a. Chenghuang, is just like how it sounds: the divine guardian of a city, who also pulls double duty as the head of the local Dead People Customs Office. They are usually virtuous officials deified posthumously, and in JTTW, they fall under the category of "Ghostly immortals", together with the Earth Gods a.k.a. Tudi.

So Xiao Ming went with the two ghost cops——not like he had much of a choice, made his way through the long queue at the City God's office, and was now standing in front of a gruff old magistrate in traditional robes.

"Name?"

"Wang Xiao Ming."

"Age and birth dates?"

"21, April 16 2003…"

After he was done asking questions, the City God flipped through his ledger, then picked up a brush, ticked off Xiao Ming's name, and told him to go get his pass in the next room. More waiting in a queue. Wonderful.

"I never heard anything about needing a pass to get to the Underworld," the girl in front of Xiao Ming asked the ghost cops, who were standing guard nearby. "Is this a new policy or something?"

"Yeah. In the old days, we'd just drag y'all straight to the Ghost Gate." The ghost cop in black said, then muttered to himself, "Fuckin' paperworks and overpopulation, man…"

(This "Dead People Passport" thing was popularized in the middle-to-late Ming dynasty, as shown by the discovery of such documents inside tombs in southern China. )

(It might have evolved from similar passes to the Western Pure Land in lay Buddhism that recorded their acts of merits. Which, in turn, might be traced back to the "Dead People Belongings List" of Han dynasty, to be shown to Underworld bureaucrats so that no one would take away the dead's private property down there or something.)

Anyways, after he received his pass, Xiao Ming departed together with the rest of the bunch, to be led to the Ghost Gate. It was like the world's most depressing tourist group, where instead of tour guides, you got two ghost cops in funny hats, and the only scenery in sight was the desolation of the Yellow Spring Road.

They weren't the only travellers on the road, though. Xiao Ming noticed other groups moving in the far distance, behind the fog and the flickering ghostfire, led by similar figures in black and white.

It made a lot of sense; realistically, there was no way two ghost cops could fetch hundreds of thousands of dead people all by themselves.

(SEA Tang-ki mediums believed there were multiple Tua Di Ya Peks——Hokkien name for the Black and White Impermanences, working for different Underworld Courts.)

At last, the Ghost Gate stood in front of Xiao Ming, guarded by two towering figures. Normally, they'd be Ox-Head and Horse-Face, like what you see at Haw Par Villa's Underworld entrance.

However, older Han dynasty works like Wang Chong's 论衡·订鬼 also mentioned two gods, Shenshu and Yulei, as guardians of the Ghost Gate, who would use reed ropes to capture malicious ghosts and feed them to tigers, making them possibly the earliest incarnation of "Gate Gods".

So here, they were what Xiao Ming sees, standing side by side like proper doormen, silently watching herds of ghosts being funneled through the entrance.

The place was more crowded than a train station during the CNY Spring Rush; the ghost cops had already said their quick goodbye and left to fetch the next group of dead people, leaving the resident officials of the Underworld proper to maintain order and quell any would-be riots.

Now you started seeing the Ox-Head and Horse-Face guys, poking at unruly ghosts with their pitchforks and dragging away the violent ones in chains. Among their ranks were other monstrous beings, blue-faced yakshas and imps, but also regular dead humans who look 100% done with their jobs, like the lady who stamped Xiao Ming's pass when it was finally his turn.

After this point, Xiao Ming had entered the Underworld proper, and his next destination would be the First Court, led by King Qin'guang. Here, his fate should be decided by what is revealed in the King's magical mirror.

If Xiao Ming was a good guy, or someone who had done an equal amount of good and bad things in life, he'd be sent straight to the Tenth Court for reincarnation. However, if the mirror, while replaying his life events, had displayed more evil deeds than good ones, he'd be sent to one of the 2nd-9th Courts for judgment and then punished inside the Eighteen Hells.

Each of the Ten Kings was also assisted by ghostly judges. Many of them were righteous and just officials in life who had been recruited into the Ten Courts posthumously——Cui Jue from JTTW is one such example, while others were living people working part-time for the Underworld, like how Wei Zheng, Taizong's minister, works part-time for the Celestial Bureaucracy in JTTW.

We decide to be nice to Xiao Ming, so, after reliving some embarrassing childhood incidents and cringy teenage phases in front of a bunch of dead bureaucrats, he was found innocent and sent to the Tenth Court.

The queue here was almost as long as the First Court's, stretching on and on alongside of the banks of the Nai River. King of the Turning Wheel made his judgment without even lifting his head when it was Xiao Ming's turn:

"Path of Humans, male, healthy in body and mind, ordinary family. Next!"

Exiting the Tenth Court building, Xiao Ming saw the Terrace of Forgetfulness, standing tall before six bridges, made of gold, silver, jade, stone, wood, and…some unidentified material. Before he could get a good look at them and the little dots moving across those bridges, he was hurried into the Terrace by the ghostly officials.

Now, both JTTW and the Jade Records mention multiple bridges across the Nai River. In the former, there is 3, and the latter, 6. The bridges made of precious materials are for people who will reincarnate into better lives, as the wealthy, the fortunate, and the divine, while the Naihe Bridge is either the common option or the terribad shitty option.

However, the Naihe Bridge proved to be so iconic, it became THE bridge you walk across to reincarnate in popular legends.

Anyways, back to Xiao Ming. He found himself standing in a giant soup kitchen of sorts, with an old lady at the counter, scooping soup out of her steaming pot and into one cup after another.

This is Mengpo, the amnesia soup granny; according to the Jade Records, she was born in the Western Han era, and a pious cultivator who thought of neither the past nor the future, only knowing that her surname was Meng.

Made into an Underworld god by the Jade Emperor, she cooks a soup of five flavors that will wipe the memory of the dead, making sure they do not remember any of their past lives once they reincarnate.

It tastes awful. Like what you get after pouring corn syrup, coffee, chilli sauce, lemon juice and seawater into the same cup.

Such was Xiao Ming's last thought, as he gulped down the soup, and then he knew no more.

Things you should know about the Chinese Underworld:

1. It's not the Christian Hell.

Rather, the Chinese Underworld functions somewhat like the Purgatory, in that there are a lot of torment, but the torment's not eternal, however long the duration may be. Once you finish your sentence, you get reincarnated as something else, though that "something else" is not a guaranteed good birth.

Other people can also speed up the process via transferring of merits: hiring a priest/monk to chant sutras and perform rituals, for example, or performing good deeds in life in dedication to the dead, or they can pray to a Daoist/Buddhist deity to save their loved ones from a dreadful fate.

Interestingly enough, a thesis paper I read mentions that, whereas Buddhist salvation from the Hells was based on transference of merits——you give monks offerings and pay them to chant sutras, so they can cancel out the sinners' bad karma with good ones, Daoist ideas of salvation tend to involve the priest going down there, sorting it out with the Underworld officials, and taking the dead out of the Hells themselves.

(The paper also stops at the Northern-Southern and Tang dynasties, so the above is likely period-specific.)

2. Nor is it run by evil demons.

Underworld officials are not nice guys and look pretty monstrous and torture the sinful dead, but they are not the embodiment of evil. Rather, the faction as a whole is what I'd call Lawful Neutral, who function on this "An Eye for An Eye" logic, where every harm the sinner caused in life must be returned to them, in order for their karmic debts to be cleansed and move on to their next life.

They can absolutely be corrupt and incompetent and take bribes——Tang dynasty Zhiguai tales and Qing folklore compendiums featured plenty of such cases, but that's a very mundane and human kind of evil, not a cosmic/innate one.

This is just my personal opinion, but if you want to do an "evil" Chinese Underworld? It should be a very bureaucratic evil, whose leaders are bootlickers to the higher-ups, slavedrivers to their rank-and-file workers, and bullies who abuse their power over regular dead people.

Not, y'know, Satan and his infernal legions or conspiring Cthulu cultists.

3. The Ten Kings are not Hades.

Make no mistake, they still have a lot of power over your average dead mortal. But in the grand scheme of things? They are the backwater department of the pantheon, who only show up in JTTW to get pushed around and revive the occasional dead people.

When Taizong made his trip to the Underworld, the Ten Kings greeted him as equals——kings of ghosts to the king of the living. If they see themselves as equal in status to a mortal emperor, then, like any mortal emperors, they are subordinate to the Celestial Host, and the balance of power is not even remotely equal or in their favor.

Also, it isn't said outright, but under the Zhong-Lv classification of immortals JTTW is using, Underworld officials will likely be considered Ghostly immortals, the lowest and weakest of the five types, much like Tudis and Chenghuangs.

Essentially: they are ghosts that are powerful enough to not reincarnate and linger on and on, spirits of pure Yin as opposed to true immortals, who are beings of pure Yang.

It's pretty much the shittiest form of immortality, the result you get when you try to speedrun cultivation (the Zhong-Lv text also made a dig at Buddhist meditation here), and if they don't reincarnate or regain a physical body, there is no chance of progressing any further.

Oh, and fun fact? In the Song dynasty, commoners and literati elites alike believed that virtuous officials in life would get appointed as ghostly officials in death.

However, the latter viewed it as a punishment. Which was strange, considering how they still held the same position and the same amount of authority, just over dead people instead of living ones, so there should be no big losses, right?

Well...it was precisely the "dead people" part that made it a punishment. See, a lot of the power and prestige they had as officials came from the benefits they could bring to their families and kins and native places, as well as the potential wealth and reputation bonuses for themselves.

A job in the Dead People Supreme Court would give them the same workload, but with none of those benefits. Since all the dead people had to reincarnate eventually, they couldn't have a fixed group as their power base, or keep their old familial ties and connections. At most, they could help out an occasional dead relative or two.

Like, working for the Underworld Courts was the kind of deadend (no pun intended) job not even living officials wanted for themselves in the afterlife. That's how hilariously sad and pathetic they are.

4. In JTTW at least, they aren't even the highest authorities of the Underworld.

That would be Bodhisattva Ksitigarbha, who is technically their boss, though he seems to be more of a spiritual leader than someone who is actually involved in running the bureaucracy.

Which makes sense, since he has sworn an oath to not attain Buddhahood until all Hells are empty, and his role is to offer relief and salvation to the suffering souls, not judging and punishing them.

Now, historically...even though Ksitigarbha in early Tang legends was still the savior of the dead, he seemed to be unable to interfere with the judicial process of the Underworld, merely showing up to take people away before they were judged by King Yama.

However, in the mid-Tang apocryphal "Sutra of Bodhisattva Ksitigarbha" (地藏菩萨经), he had evolved into the equal of King Yama, with the power of supervision over his judgements. By the time the Scripture on the Ten Kings came out, in artistic depictions, the Ten Kings had become fully subservient to him.

5. Diyu usually refers to the prison-torture chamber part, not the courthouse, nor is it the entirety of the Underworld.

And for the majority of souls that haven't committed crimes, they'll only see the courthouse part before they are sent to reincarnation. That's why I personally don't like, or use the name Diyu for the Chinese Underworld: I prefer the term Difu ("Earth Mansions"), which encompasses the whole realm better.

Also: even though historical sources like the Scripture on the Ten Kings and Jade Records seem to suggest that the dead were just funneled through this Courthouse-Prison-Reincarnation pipeline with no breaks in between, in practice, that isn't the case.

According to popular folk beliefs, after the dead were done with their trials/sentences, they stayed in the Underworld for a period of time and led regular lives, while functioning as ancestor spirits and receiving offerings.

Which would imply that the Underworld had a civilian district of sorts, populated by regular ghosts, making the whole realm even less of a direct Hell/Purgatory equivalent.

6. It is located in a different realm, but still part of the Six Paths and doesn't exist outside of reality.

In Buddhist cosmology, like the Celestial Realm, the Underworld is part of the Realm of Desires and thus subject to all the woes of samsara.

The pain and misery of the Path of Hell may be the worst and most obvious, but becoming a celestial being isn't the goal of serious Buddhists either: despite all the pleasures and near-infinite lifespan they enjoy, they are not free from samsara and will eventually have to reincarnate.

So if, say, the world is being destroyed at the end of a kalpa, all beings of the Six Paths will perish alongside it, leaving behind a clean slate for the cycle to start anew. The dead won't all end up in the Underworld and face eternal damnation.

7. The Black and White Impermanences would not appear in the Underworld pantheon formally until the Qing dynasty.

The concept that when you die, you get fetched to the Underworld by petty ghost bureaucrats is already well-established in Tang legends, but these were just generic ghost bureaucrats in all sorts of colorful official robes, with yellow being the most common color.

The idea of there being two specific psychopomps in black and white would only become popular in the Qing dynasty. Mengpo is kinda similar: although she existed before the Ming-Qing era as a goddess of wind, venerated by boatmen, her "amnesia soup granny" incarnation came from the Jade Records.

[under-your-floorboards]

Okay but I love the idea that everyone just thinks Nico calls himself the Ghost King as like an emo thing but no, he literally is that. They all find out it’s his actual title little by little in the most unusual situations.

Uh oh, the Hekate cabin summoned the wrong ghosts during a seance and now the spirits are tearing up the place! No worries tho, we have a resident son of Hades, right? Nico walks into the cabin and immediately, the items that were being thrown around like an indoor hurricane all drop to the floor at once. Three little kid ghosts appear in front of Nico with their best smiles as he sighs down on them like “what did I tell you three?” And proceeds to lecture them for the next ten minutes while the Hekate campers watch on struggling to understand what was happening until Nico opens a rift to the underworld and corrals the three through while the kids call “come play with us again, King, or we wouldn’t get bored and come mess with people!” As they disappear into the mists.

Or like Thanatos appears in CHB one day and everyone is freaked cause who died?? Are they all dying?? What’s happening?? But no, he just glides over to Nico and bows respectfully with a “King Nico, a pleasure to see you again. It seems I will need your assistance again with wayward souls I have recently reaped from mortality” and Nico is just sucking a juice box as he nods along to all of this as if it’s another fucking Tuesday. Then he just leaves,, with the God of Death after promising Will to be back by dinner so everyone is like ‘WHAT THE FUCK’ and then there’s like Percy and Annabeth off to the side like ‘imagine having royal duties at 14, couldn’t be me’

Please, I need this

[aliciavance4228]

The Iliad: Funny Moments

The year was 850-750 BCE. No phones or underwear in sight. Pants were for the uncivilized only. Unibrows were attractive. And then, one day, Homer decides to write the first Greek Mythology Fanfiction ever, called "Troy Story".

Here is a list of moments from the Iliad which I personally consider to be quite hilarious:

1. Early on in Book 2, before the enormous list of Greek fighters and ships:

Agamemnon tries to motivate/test the army by claiming that he's given up and they're going home. This backfires, as a stampede for the ships ensues.

In response, Athena comes down and gives Odysseus a pep talk. He promptly and unceremoniously takes Agamemnon's scepter out of his hands and runs around brow-beating and occasionally actually beating men who were turning from the fight. It all comes to a head when he takes the scepter and beats the crap out of the Argives' resident disfigured hunchback who was doing nothing but making jokes at the Argive leaders' expense. In fact, the narrative itself stops and mentions that the scene was so hilarious, the soldiers in-story were laughing raucously.

Within Agamemnon's speech, his roundabout method of explaining how badly the Greeks outnumber the Trojans: let's say they have a truce, and each side takes a census, and each group of ten Greek soldiers gets one (male) resident of Troy to pour their wine. "There would be many tens of men lacking a pourer of wine."

2. At one point early in the story Paris steps out among the Trojan soldiers, described as looking like a god, and dares any Greek soldier to come up and face him in battle. Menelaus steps forward to answer the call—and Paris promptly flees back behind his soldiers.

3.Menelaus beating Paris up with his bare hands, while the latter still has his sword. The dramatic way in which it's written makes it a tad more serious, until you remember that Menelaus is choking Paris with the strap of his own hat.

4. Throughout the book, the Greeks continuously throw spears at Hector, but Apollo just deflects them into his charioteer instead, before Hector just picks up another random guy off the battlefield. This happens numerous times throughout the book that it's almost a running gag.

5. The Greeks send an embassy to beg Achilles to come join the fighting again. At first he receives them in friendship, but when he's heard them out, he has Patroclus start passive-aggressively preparing a bed for the only member of the embassy he's invited to spend the night, to signal to the others it's time for them to leave. Thus proving that "it was so nice to see you, but wow, look at the time, we should be getting to bed!" is a tactic Older Than Dirt.

6. When Hera seduces Zeus to distract him, he describes how attractive she is by comparing her with some of the other women he's slept with. It takes about 20 lines in the original Greek.

7. During the battle between the men and gods, Artemis squares up with Hera after her brother decides against fighting Poseidon. You'd think Artemis, the epic huntress and receiver of human sacrifice she is, armed with a powerful bow and fitting the Action Girl trope to a tee would utterly wreck the seemingly frilly, stuck up, less capable Hera. Hera instead chastises Artemis for being a brat biting off way more than she can chew, gives her a verbal tongue lashing before snatching Artemis's bow away before she can get a shot off to give her a lashing with that. Artemis gets wailed on so badly she literally is sent running away crying home to her daddy Zeus.

8. One tangent mentions Hades making a grand entrance at Pylos, only to be immediately shot with one of Heracles' arrows, forcing him to abandon the fight and flee to Olympus to heal. Later, Poseidon makes an earthquake so strong Hades jumps out of his chair in fear that the Underworld will be exposed due to the quake.

9. Early on in the epic, King Priam calls to Helen to explain to him who is leading the Greek army - Agamemnon, Odysseus, Menelaus, etc - because Priam doesn't know who they are. The Greeks have been at war with his kingdom for nine years before this point. One would imagine who had such a role would be at the forefront of his thoughts or that he would at least bother to remember their names, especially since a Pre-Iliad episode had Odysseus and Menelaus before him arguing that Helen be returned.

10. After a long discussion of their ancestries, Glaucus and Diomedes shake hands and exchange armor as a pledge of Sacred Hospitality. The narrator notes that Glaucus got ripped off, because his armor was worth over ten times as much.

11. A wounded Sarpedon thinks he's about to die and begins giving Hector a Bury Me Not on the Lone Prairie speech. Hector, who he'd been arguing with several verses back, runs right past him without answering.

12. The standard heroic epithets being used at incongruous times. Godlike Paris hiding from Menelaus, godlike and enduring Odysseus running away while Diomedes yells at him to come back, Menelaus being called "beloved of Ares" while Ares is trying to get him killed, glorious Ajax the Lesser taking a spill face-first into ox dung...

13. Menelaus is shot and wounded. Agamemnon immediately begins mourning his brother and gets through a whole speech before Menelaus can get a word in edgewise to explain that he's still alive.

Credits: TV Tropes

[momonyu]

the one that (almost) got away

roronoa zoro x fem!reader

it takes him 12 hours to realize

3.6k words

a/n: ok listen, i think i started writing this like 6+ months ago and it’s just been sitting in my drafts bc idk how to commit to endings so y’all are gonna have to take this as it is. also i have no concept of how sailing works or how long it takes oops

9:00 pm

“y'know, there's really no point to a farewell party if the one leaving isn't there.”

you look up from your spot on the library floor. your eyes land on the green-haired swordsman leaning against the doorframe and you smile.

“i’ll be there in a second. i just have some more stuff to go through.”

zoro eyes the mess of books surrounding you, recognizing a few of nami’s atlases and robin’s textbooks. “you haven’t finished packing yet?”

“i’m mostly done. i’m just trying to decide which books i want to keep.” catching his eye, you joke, “why? you want me gone that bad?”

crossing the room, a scoff leaves his lips. nothing could be further from the truth.

“you got me. i am so sick of you,” he says with a grin. “can’t wait to get rid of the annoying librarian invading my napping spot.”

zoro plops down on the bench behind you, catching a whiff of your shampoo as he lies down. you sit with your back to him, sorting through your piles, but zoro can hear the smile in your voice when you speak.

“you’re such a pretender, eh?”

zoro puts on a look of overdramatic offense, a hand on his chest. “me? you’re talking about me?”

at his poor acting, you turn around. you rest your chin on the bench, your face so close to zoro’s that one could only describe it as a kissable distance.

“you act like i'm all in your space, but nami told me that you never used to spend any time in here at all!”

“pfft, why would you ever trust what that con artist has to say?” zoro pokes your forehead. “you see it with your own eyes. am i or am i not here every day?”

you purse your lips as you think back to the last few months; he’s right.

you’ve spent most of your days in the ship’s library, and zoro has almost always stopped by. in the beginning, it would be for a few minutes, but over the last little while, he’d be in here as long as you were.

zoro smiles as he watches you think, eyebrows furrowed as you replay the last few months in your head. little do you know that this is exactly why the library is his new hideout. watching your pretty little mind work — doing what you love, thinking and studying and reading — is a far better use of his spare time than anything else he could be doing.

“anyway,” he says. “i guess your silly star stories have been a good trade-off.”

now it’s your turn to be mock-offended.

“silly star stories? you’re the one who asked about the constellations in the first place!”

“only because you kept talking about these fictional gods like they actually did something important.”

“says the guy who's completely enthralled by hades,” you roll your eyes.

“king of hell, god of the underworld,” he grins. “that’s my kinda guy.”

zoro laughs when you shake your head at him. he’ll never tire of teasing you; you are far too adorable with your little sigh and a ghost of a smile on your lips.

“did you know,” he says with a playful look. “that you still owe me about ten more constellation stories? d’you think you could squeeze in one more before we head up?”

zoro smiles at you, and you can't help but smile back. 

you have so many treasured memories with zoro in this library; ones of just the two of you (him napping while you studied), ones with nami and robin (and sanji until nami kicked the boys out for their incessant bickering), and ones where the night listens in as you recite the history of the stars.

whether you were telling the story of another righteous deity enacting justice, or the tale of mere mortals who insulted the gods, zoro would listen with his eyes closed, lying across the bench as he is now, and you’d sit in front of him as you are now.

everyone’s waiting for you upstairs and you hate to disappoint, but some things are more important — like telling a silly star story to a silly swordsman.

“of course i can.”

12:00 am

raucous laughter and cheering that’s loud enough to deafen anybody; empty plates, once piled high with food, now scattered around the room; bottles on bottles of sake and rum and whiskey and every liqueur that one would hope to find on a pirate ship.

these are zoro’s requirements for a good time, and suffice to say that your farewell party has them all in spades.

zoro watches his friends’ tomfoolery from his spot at the table (currently, luffy’s trying to get franky to see how far he can slingshot him) when you plop yourself into the seat beside him.

“this,” you say as your arm knocks against his, “is the best party i’ve ever been to.”

zoro takes a swig from his glass, “you haven’t partied until you’ve partied with pirates.”

“seriously! you guys are insane!”

as if to prove your point, franky chooses that exact moment to show off a juggling sequence involving a barrel of whiskey, a giant potted plant, and a squealing chopper.

you gasp at the spectacle but quickly dissolve into laughter when nami saves chopper, and it’s with both awe and pure excitement that you turn to zoro. laughter is etched into your lips, your cheeks are flushed, and zoro can’t help but marvel at how you’re even cuter when you’re having fun.

“what, you’ve never seen a cyborg man toss a speaking reindeer in the air before?”

you nudge him with your elbow, “well, excuse me for leading such a mundane life where animals don’t speak and men don’t tinker with their bodies.”

“ah, but that’s where you’re wrong.”

you look at zoro quizically.

he takes a sip of his beer, “most men do tinker with their bodies.”

it takes you a moment to catch his innuendo and zoro roars with laughter when the realization hits you. embarrassment tinges your pretty face and you shove him with a loud “ew, zoro!” but he can’t stop cackling.

“you’re disgusting!”

you make to swat zoro across the chest but he quickly catches your hand. he leans in to waggle his eyebrows at you, “but i’m not wrong, am i?”

you groan loudly, which only makes him laugh again.

perhaps it’s the alcohol that let his inhibitions go, or maybe it’s the fact that he doesn’t have much longer with you, but when you hastily change the subject and there’s no longer a reason for him to still be holding your hand, he doesn’t let go.

when nami joins you two, his fingers slips between yours and to his surprise, yours do the same. sanji joins your threesome, then franky and robin, and in no time at all, it’s no longer just the two of you at the table.

but zoro doesn’t care.

drunk, carefree, and more content than he’s ever been, zoro closes his eyes and smiles. he lives in the moment, and in this moment, he’s happy — happy with a full stomach and a full glass, happy to be surrounded by his favourite people, and happy that, under the table, you’re still holding his hand.

3:00 am

“and what’s that one?”

hands swinging between you, you and zoro dodge the tide as you roam further and further from the thousand sunny. the sand is cool under your feet and the tide kisses your toes with each step. your other arm is stretched above you, pointing at a constellation in the distance.

“what is this - a pop quiz?”

you smile, “i want to make sure you don’t forget about my ‘silly star stories.’”

zoro groans, “has anyone told you that holding grudges isn’t healthy? keeping going and you’ll turn into a bitter old thing some day.”

you stick out your tongue, “you’re just afraid you’ll get it wrong.”

“wrong?” zoro scoffs. “i’ve gotten the past six right.”

walking along the beach, you and zoro fall in step with each other and your footsteps match the ebbing waves in perfect rhythm. you smile in his direction and his chest is flooded with a warmth that has nothing to do with the copious amounts of alcohol he’s consumed.

“alright, let’s see what we got here.”

zoro follows your gaze at the cluster of stars you’ve chosen, and he grins when he sees the constellation. “really? at least try to make this hard for me, please.”

his cocky attitude leaves you speechless, making zoro laugh. 

“you’re so annoying!” you shove him with your free hand and the force of his stumble pulls you along, and you shriek as he drags you into the ocean with him. he doesn’t let go of you, not even for a second — not when water splashes your legs, not when zoro’s pants get soaked as he spins you around. 

your laughter is warmth in its purest form, the kind that you can feel all the way down to your cold toes. when he sets you back down, you give his hand a little squeeze, to which zoro answers back with a tender smile.

now with wet feet and a distance between you that’s even smaller than it already was, zoro continues to walk alongside you.

“moving on from your pathetic distraction attempt,” — you let out a dramatic gasp — “i’ll tell you exactly who we were looking at.”

pointing at the starry zodiac sign, zoro speaks with complete confidence.

“virgo the maiden, otherwise known as persephone, wife and muse of the best god of them all, hades—”

“fanboy much?” you tease but zoro pretends not to hear you (the little tug of his lips tells you that he does).

“—who snuck her a pomegranate seed because he couldn’t bear for her to leave him.”

zoro puffs his chest with pride, relishing in this one niche study of which he is now an expert. it’s incredibly endearing how pleased he is with his answer and you almost feel bad for correcting him.

almost.

“good answer,” you grin. “but you left out the little detail about how she was kept in hell against her will.”

zoro gasps, “are you accusing my idol of being a kidnapper?”

“your idol!” your cheeks already hurt so much from smiling but another giggle slips out. “first of all, these aren’t my accusations. historians have told their love story this way for years—”

“slander is what this is.”

“—and secondly, why would you want to look up to hades? he’s literally the antagonist in every story.”

“he’s the king of hell! that’s so bad ass.” zoro winks at you, “don’t be surprised if you hear them calling me ‘zoro, king of hell’ some day.”

“what’s wrong, demon of east blue doesn’t go hard enough for you?”

embarrassment rushes to zoro’s face and he’s never been more grateful for the night. “who told you that? was it usopp or nami? i bet it was nami.”

“i might hold a grudge but i don’t snitch,” you flash a mischievous smile. “anyway, let’s get back to how you want to be just like devil who tricked a poor girl in returning to the underworld.”

“come on, can you blame a man for doing whatever it takes to stop his beloved from leaving him?”

it sounds like an innocent question — harmless banter, really — but something in the way he says it makes you stop dead in your tracks. a silence falls and in its wake, all you can do is stare at the man you’ve spent the last several months with, the same man that you have to say goodbye to tomorrow.

moonlight falls unto the both of you and bathes zoro in soft light. it illuminates his eyes and when you meet his gaze, you see a sense of longing there that you feel in your chest. a longing for what, you don’t know — or rather, you don’t want to know.

at least, not yet.

so you hold his hand a little tighter, and underneath the watchful eye of the gods and constellations, muster a smile,

“i guess not.”

6:00 am

if this was any other morning, zoro would be awake and working out already. he'd be done his fourth set of bicep curls or, at the very least, working on his form. he could even be in the middle of deadlifts (because he knows not to skip leg day), but he definitely wouldn't still be in bed the way that he is right now.

the thing is though, if this was any other morning, he wouldn't have you sleeping next to him, curled into him like you were made to be a perfect fit.

he's never been more glad to still be in bed.

your breath matches the rise and fall of zoro's chest, perfectly in rhythm with the waves outside his window and the beat of his heart, like the universe meant for all these things to be in harmony at this one singular moment in time.

your lashes flutter in response when he shifts his weight.

he takes a peek at you, “psst, are you awake?”

eyes still closed, you manage a noncommittal grunt but your body says otherwise.

zoro can’t help but smile as he watches you start to wake up. your toes wiggle beneath the covers and you rub your eyes before looking up at him with an adorably sleepy look that he would love to wake up to every day. 

if only he could.

you focus your gaze on zoro like he’s an anchor in a sea of slumber. the way that you look at him, as if he’s the only thing that you see, fills his chest with a golden warmth akin to the breaking dawn.

you offer him a soft smile, and zoro wonders if the sun knows that you glow brighter than it ever could.

“why are you up at this ungodly hour?”

he chuckles, low and tender, “’m used to it. i’m usually up by now.”

“freak,” you mutter. zoro laughs, and you can’t think of anything else that sounds more beautiful at six in the morning.

you’re not usually up this early but what you notice is that, at dawn, time has a habit of moving slowly. it’s as if the morning casts magic upon those who rise with the daylight — and you’re so thankful for that.

because if time moved any faster than this, you’d have to say goodbye that much sooner.

“are you going to miss us?” zoro puts his arms around you.

you murmur into his chest, “of course, i will.”

“who do you think you’ll miss the most?” 

you give pause and zoro’s almost certain you can hear his heart beating a little louder — he can definitely hear it. he doesn’t typically get nervous like this but, then again, nothing about the way you make him feel is typical.

you seem to have come to a conclusion because you look up at zoro and he holds his breath. 

“sanji.”

he blinks.

“wait, are you serious?”

you’ve never seen zoro looks so wonderfully scandalized before, and you burst into a fit of giggles. as soon as you start, he knows he’s been had. he scowls but only for a moment; for who could be upset in the presence of such twinkling laughter?

 “silly man,” you snuggle closer, "of course i’m not serious.”

“okay, good.” you can hear the smile in his voice. “i don’t know if my ego could handle losing to him.”

zoro holds you close, his thumb tracing circles on your skin. his movements are slow, steady, comforting — ‘round and ‘round, in the same spot, like he’s drawing an invisible mark that is only known to the two of you.

"but, you know,” you hum, careful not to disrupt the peace. “you wouldn’t.”

“wouldn’t what?”

“lose.” and after a beat, you quietly add, “you wouldn’t lose to anyone.”

and just like that, zoro’s on cloud nine, airborne and weightless. he’s always known that he has a place in your heart, but this is the first time that you’ve ever hinted about where that place may be. if he allowed himself to be hopeful, it almost sounds like a confession. 

but almost isn’t good enough for him. zoro wants more — wants to find out exactly where he belongs in your life, wants to know if he can make himself at home there. 

it’s a shame that he’s out of time.

you interrupt his thoughts with a whisper, barely audible above the sound of the ocean and his aching heart,

“will you miss me?” 

more than anything.

9:00 am

surely, zoro’s dream to be hades has been granted. otherwise, why would it feel like he’s in hell, standing on the deck, all alone and watching your dinghy sail away from the thousand sunny?

zoro’s had his fair shares of farewells while aboard the ship, and to be honest, yours wasn’t any more emotional than anyone else’s. you left with a smile as beautiful as the morning sun and with far less tears than he expected (which he’s thankful for because he would hate to see you cry). as far as bittersweet goodbyes go, yours was definitely more sweet than bitter.

and yet, here zoro stands, with a bad taste in his mouth that he can’t explain. he can still see you from where he stands, and watching your little boat in the distance is the only thing that seems to settle his uneasy heart. 

should he have bid adieu privately? maybe he should’ve left you with a memento of some kind? should he have done more than offer you a quick hug? was it his imagination, or did you hold onto him just a beat longer than you needed to?

zoro’s so occupied by these messy thoughts that he doesn’t even hear sanji approach him.

“well?”

startled, zoro can only stare at the blond cook. ignoring the dumb look on his face, sanji continues.

“what’d she say when you told her?” sanji nods in the direction of your boat.

“told her what?”

“that you love her,” sanji takes a drag of his cigarette, looking at zoro directly now.

he speaks so frankly, so matter-of-fact and candidly, that it takes zoro a second to really register what it is that he’s saying. 

he loves you.

and as soon as he thinks it, the truth comes barreling through all the doubts clouding his head. clarity floods his chest as he comes face-to-face with what his yearning, pining heart has been trying to tell him this whole time.

he loves you. he loves you. he loves you. he loves you. he loves you-

fuck.

he loves you.

and he never told you.

epilogue — 9:30 am

sails closed, your boat floats with the current and the salty breeze reminds you that your adventure with the strawhats has come to a close. compared to the never-ending bustle of the crew, it’s almost too quiet being at sea alone. the silence lends itself to your overactive mind, working full time to unravel the tightness you feel in your chest.

you’re lost in thoughts of what could’ve, should’ve, and would’ve been — so much so that you don’t even hear the commotion behind you. it’s not until you hear zoro call your name that you hear the frantic swimming and you whirl around.

“zoro! what-”

“can you help me first?” he splutters.

you pull yourself together long enough to run to the side of your dinghy, pulling a sopping wet pirate on board. zoro leans back, trying to catch his breath as you rummage through your things.

“are you crazy? do you know how far we are from the sunny?” you throw a towel over him before reaching for another. you start drying off his hair, frantically fussing over him.

“you think that just because chopper gives you the clearance that you can push yourself over the limit-”

“y/n.”

“this is why you’re always on house arrest! you’re actually insane, you know that?”

“y/n.”

“i know you work out, but for goodness’ sake, zoro, you’re only human-”

“y/n.” zoro holds your wrists, forcing you to stop with a start.

in all your worrying, you didn’t realize that you’d been gravitating closer to zoro until you’re staring into his dark, obsidian eyes. there’s clarity in the way that he looks at you. his eyes are shining with a fierceness that you’ve only seen in his worst fights, and you brace yourself for whatever comes next.

because you know that this will change everything.

“hades and persephone.”

“huh?“ you blink at him. “did you hit your head-”

“ask me if i think hades loved persephone.”

you stare into zoro’s eyes, desperation reflecting back at you. there’s a hidden question there and you understand immediately.

quietly, you ask, "do you think hades loved persephone?”

“i do,” he whispers. “i think he loved her and he would've been stupid to let her go.”

your breath catches. zoro places a hand over yours, surprisingly warm as his fingers find their home between your own.

the heavens watch on as the two of you finally open your hearts and give way to the stuff that myths and legends yearn for — a connection that can only be described as fated, destined, purely and resplendently magical.

the gods smile at the two lovers who find themselves falling into each other, laughing as you confess, over and over again,

i love you.

[kaisntbreathing]

Making out wt HH characters?

Yes tysm Anon <3

MAKING OUT WT HAZBIN HOTEL CHARACTERS

SLIGHT NSFW WARNING AHEAD

PLOT SUMMARY:

Making out wt Hazbin Hotel Characters wt a lil ✨ spice ✨

WARNINGS:

SLIGHT NSFW(?), explicit explanations of tongues, mouths, and fangs, Demon forms (Lucifer, Alastor, and Vox), reader gets a tiny jolt (Vox), consensual(preemptive) hypnosis (Vox), Valentino, Male whimpering (Lucifer), horn grabbing, reader is a demon, reader is female, oversized reader (Lucifer),

A/N:

💀

༶•┈┈⛧┈ ♱ ┈⛧┈┈•༶

ALASTOR

⛧ One day while you were at the Hazbin Hotel, you had nothing really important planned for the day so you had decided to go help Nifty clean up. You lifted her up to the higher places she normally couldn't get to as her height prevented her.

⛧ As usual everyone went as they normally did through the day as you helped and assisted Nifty, eventually Alastor came back as per usual but this time he was momentarily stunned by you helping the closest thing to a daughter figure (aside from Charlie) he had, clean. All with a gentle smile on your face as you held the small demon up as she cleaned, you noticed Alastor giving him a smile.

⛧ Later on that day it was much later in the evening, almost midnight as you were sleepily stumbling through the hallways as Alastor couldn't help but pin you against the wall with his shadow as he himself emerged from the darkness as he pulled you into a heavy and hot kiss.

⛧ God help you if you try to hold onto his little black antlers or his perky red and black ears, he'll go fucking feral. As the kiss eventually and rather quickly got more feverish and passionate, his true demon form slowly leaked through as his black antlers grew in size very slowly.

"My little fawn..."

LUCIFER

✝︎ You had been happily married to the king of Hell himself for about nine years and your anniversary was a few days away, it would be marking ten years, and you couldn't be any more excited for it either. Anyways, you'd gone shopping the other day for some new clothes and you we're trying it on in your and Lucifer's shared room.

✝︎ You were undressed and relaxed in your natural demon form as your tail swished around behind you and your horns curled around your head as you looked at yourself in the mirror as you wore a pair of black lace underwear and a matching black bra, suddenly you heard the door click open as you spun around covering up instinctively as you looked at the door as your husband stood there mouth agape.

✝︎ As you realized it was only him you relaxed and uncovered yourself as you smiled at him as he still gawked over your perfect form as you greeted him and walked towards him for a hug as you hugged him he flushed brightly, your chest cupping together perfectly as you squished against him as your thighs jiggled as you moved, and your tummy spilled over your underwear slightly as your hips dipped very slightly but they were full, your tail swished around behind you happily as you felt the bond between you both flutter around you making your skin tingle as he cupped your cheek pulling you down pressing your lips gently against his as he started slow and gentle as the kiss slowly got more heavy and hot.

"My queen."

VOX

⚡︎ You and Vox had a established relationship and you meant the whole underworld to him, you were his everything in his eyes you were absolutely perfect in every single way, he loved you without a doubt and you both knew it, and of course you loved him to. This being said you both had already established boundaries and rules and he knew what you did and don't like.

⚡︎ When he's out at work or doing some kind of business you're wandering around his and your shared apartment cleaning up or trying to pass the time, practically watching the hours and minutes tick by antagonizingly slowly, waiting for your lover to get home to you. You always felt the safest in Vox's arms or at his house, safe enough to let your demon form show freely as you walked around.

⚡︎ When he gets home finally you immediately perk up no matter how tired you were, looking for him as you quickly went to him, you clung to him as you nuzzled into his suit his teal blue claws gently held your thighs holding you up as you locked your legs around him as he pressed you into a hot and steamy kiss and he pinned you against the wall, as his hands explored your body curiously as he took over your mouth as he pinned your wrists above your head with one hand as he pressed his free hand into your side gently sending a jolt through you, making you gasp and squirm.

⚡︎ If you allow him to he'd be more then happy to use his ability to hypnotize you while you have spicy time or while just making out, either way it feels like a hazy fever dream and it feels good.

VALENTINO

♡ Making out with him is on a totally different level than anything else you've ever experienced before and you absolutely love it, if you let him he'd happily use his pink smoke on you while getting it down or just making out.

♡ He has more than enough pairs of hands to hold, grab, and grope you with and he's got the tongue and talent to do it, he loves holding your curves and cupping your chest while shoving his tongue down your throat as pink smoke swirled around you both fogging your mind making your head spin and your eyes closed and rolled back into your head as you whimpered as he tugged on your collar gently.

♡ He chuckled as he pulled away leaving you breathless and panting heavily trying to regain your breath as you looked up at him as you squirmed around on his lap whining softly.

"My babydoll."

[quitealotofsodapop]

Ooh, the Stone Egg coming out when Xiaotian is courtnapped by Ruyi? Xiaotian is already stressed out from being abducted by a creepy older guy and now having to deal with Demon Bull family drama and Ruyi's incel/conservative uncle behavior-

But-

*slides idea that DBK's parents still alive and FURIOUS when they learn that their great-grandbaby is being born early because their son's an idiot and adding to the drama when the grandchild they never met SLAMS down the door to get to his mate*

Best way to describe my idea of the Immortal Ruyi is somewhere between "Scar" from Lion King + a stereotypical dark wizard.

Ruyi feels inferior to his older brother, banished or not. He feels that he must scrounge and hoard whatever power he must in order to secure his position - everything except changing a thing about himself.

When the Pilgrims encountered Ruyi; he was busy extorting the Kingdom of Women for access to the Abortion Spring - water that acted as a 100% guaranteed birth control for women (and unlucky monks) who did not want to have children. It wasn't just a matter of money - Ruyi has some pretty backwards ideas of what women should be "thankful for".

Makes sense why the Pilgrims beat the crap out of him and steal back all the money and treasures he's extorted from the women.

The Underworld is pretty inuslar - not much commincation between Realms happens down there. Even in the capital city of Youdu, communities are pretty self-isolating.

Except ever since what happened with the Ten Kings...

Yama/Yanluo needs to hire new staff.

Ruyi thinks he'd be a shoe-in for one of the Ten Kings! If only he had a good piece of arm candy to show off to the court...

Ruyi has a Compliant Hook that acts very simialrly to Wukong's Staff - and he might just use it to "hook" himself a stolen bride.

MK: (*finally managed to sneak out of the apartment to get a limited flavour of cheese tea*) Ruyi: (*whisks him away like an old-timey dastardly villain*) The Stone Egg, waking up: "Oh? It's game time now?"

MK of course; is NOT HAPPY with being kidnapped by some old incel demon to a corner of the Underworld!

Even more so when he realises from context clues that this is Red's Uncle!

Ruyi thinks it's foolproof. MK is a creation of Nüwa herself, and helped stabilise all of creation with actions - having him as a spouse would be major Rep points!

MK: "Dude! I'm taken! By your nephew!" Ruyi, preparing a concoction of spring water: "Do not worry. I will remove that roadblock when we come to it. Now you be a good wife and stop scolding me." MK, growing more and more furious: "I AINT YOUR WIFE!"

MK's own kaiju-form tries to activate, but can't due to the immense discomfort he's in. Only he knows the real reason for the cramping. He whispers to his baby to hold on just a little longer, as he staunchly refuses every piece of food or drink his captor tries shoving at him.

The chaos of the courtnapping, plus MK's own loud objections - alert the true masters of the Underworld Ox Palace...

I imagine DBK assumed that his parents had passed in the centuries he'd been gone - only to realise that they weren't dead, just retired from the political scene.

Ránshāo/燃烧 ("to ignite") and Fādǒu/发抖 ("shivering") were an arranged pair from birth - the union of two royal oxen clans spanning both the Hot and Cold Narakas of the Underworld.

One a dense, long-haired plume of fire. One a stern pillar of ice. Unseparable. If DBK respected anything of his parents; it was their bond.

From their union came the one who would be named "THE Demon Bull King"... and their second-born Ruyi.

They try not to play favourites but... the incident in the Kingdom of Women has soured their opinion over Ruyi's political standings. They have tried hard to throw off the imperial politics their own predecessors had imposed, and return to the "old ways". But clearly their current heir isn't wise to change.

The only thing stopping them from welcoming DBK back into their home is ultimately; Pride. If he didn't seek them out, neither would they.

Cycle of bull-headedness.

Until they smell and hear that their second-born has courtnapped himself an unwilling bride. One already with child.

MK: (*terrified and heavily pregnant*) Ruyi, showing off his prize: "Well..?" (*both ox demons look at one another... before slapping Ruyi across the head.*) Ránshāo: "YOU FOOL. Courtnapping is only legitimate if the other party accepts your affection!" Fādǒu, leaning down to MK: "The poor thing is shaking! Did you steal them from their maternity nest!? Their birth clan will have our heads if talk gets out!" Riyu, scrambling: "Well uh- I feel that they would be the perfect spouse for the heir of the Underworld Ox clan! Sun Wukong's successor is-" Both Oxen, so loud it shakes the palace: "THE WHAT?!" Ránshāo: "Are you telling me, this child is the successor of the ONE DEMON able to match our family in battle!? And you dared to kidnap him for your own selfish desires!?!" Fādǒu, hugging MK to her cool fur: "And what of their mate? Surely the existence of the calf in their stomach signals an existing sire!" Ruyi, kowtowing: "The child they carry was immaculately formed! Like the waters of the Mother-Child River! If it is an issue, I will remove it using the Spring-" (*Ruyi receives angry huffs from both parents, their breaths combining to create a boiling mist that forces him back*) Ránshāo: "Get out of my sight. We'll deal with you later." Ruyi: (*scuttles away by a cockroach*) Fādǒu, voice soft: "Child, does your clan know where you are?" MK, calming down: "No... but I imagine that they won't rest until they find me. Macaque can hear for miles, and Mei put trackers on my phone." Ránshāo: "We should prepare for guests then. We must apologize to them for the distress our second-born has caused." Fādǒu: "Is what Ruyi said true? That your child has no sire?" MK, little embarassed: "Uh! Well! It's a stone monkey thing I accidentally did. Baby is technically being made by me alone, but with Dao my body absorbs from my closest peeps and mate." Fādǒu: "Then who is your-?" (*The gates of the Underworld Ox Palace burst open as a stampede of kaijus arrive on-scene; dragon, demon, and celestial among them. The lead of the charge is a fiery cloud in the shape of a bull - the eyes burning with True Fire. The bull crashes through the front gates and throne room, trampling any obstable in it's path. It's charge only stopping when they see the monkey demon.*) Kaiju!Red Son, bellowing deep: "RETURN HIM." MK, surprised but delighted: "Red!!" :D! Both Oxen: (*share same looks of confusion and wonder*)

The sight in the palace is adorable; the tiny monkey demon waddling as fast as he can to embrace their mate, their furry arms not even able to encompass the snout. The massive bull gently nudging their smaller mate's face and belly, as if to ask "Are you okay?" The fire receding back to it's natural shape and size as more desperate kisses are shared.

No arrows or swords drawn - the appearance of Sun Wukong in his War Form put the fear of Buddha in every single one of the Oxen Palace guards.

And the appearance of the prodigal son put joy in their hearts.

DBK: (*arrives seconds later in his regular form, PIF on his shoulder. He looks confused as he realises where Red Son's trail has lead them.*) DBK, seeing the royal couple: "Mother? Father?" The Oxen couple: "Jǐn Cài Niu!?"

Ránshāo and Fādǒu don't even question why their first-born is there. The fiery tornado that ripped through their palace was nearly identical to the kaiju-form of their elder son - only now sporting the True Winds of the boy's celestial mother.

PIF herself is caught in the embrace. She's shocked by the closeness. She had not seen her in-laws in millennia - but now they greet her as if she were beloved kin? She barely manages to squeeze out of the giants' hold to watch her husband reunite with his parents.

Fādǒu: "A grandson! Xiaoniu - a grandson! And you never told us!" DBK, crying with frustration and joy: "I assumed that you did not care for him! I sent many letters to Father's office over the centuries!" Ránshāo, angry growl: "My office... the same office your younger brother as occupied for the last eon?" DBK, realising: "That bast-" Fādǒu, pulls his ear: "Do not finish that exclamation, calf." Ránshāo: "Do not blame him, my snowdrop. If Ruyi is only responsible for what happened today, he should be so lucky to live to see the next one." PIF, floating above the oxen: "I take it you've met our son's intended?" Fādǒu, gasping: "The expectant one!? Oh dear... barely a moment to adjust to knowing we're grandparents..." Ránshāo: "Now we are to expect our first great-grandchild!" Wukong, leans in to whisper: "So. We aren't in a fighting mood now, right?" DBK: "No. Now is not time for quarrel... unless you wish to catch up with my little brother. Odds are; he's already fled the palace." Mei, racing past in dragon-mode: "I CALL FIRST DIBS!"

Reunions and curb-stomps are cut short however - as MK is forced to reveal something that has been causing him grief ever since Ruyi kidnapped him.

Macaque, ears flickering: "He's in labour." Everyone present: "WHAT!?" MK, smiling through winces of pain: "Surprise?" Red Son: (*turns Kaiju-form off and in a feral rush, carries MK to a soft surface*)

Everyone is panicking, even the ones trained in midwifery. Wukong is stammering as he tries to manifest supplies from his transformed hair. Pigsy and Tang are screaming - realising that they need to grab the Bodhisattva Kṣitigarbha just in case babies aren't supposed to be born down here.

PIF is holding MK's hand, coaching him through the contractions and kissing his sweat-soaked brow. She knows the pain he's enduring.

Red is holding MK's other hand, not minding that the bones are most certainly broken by the stone monkey's grip. He's silent with excitement and fear.

Nezha briefly disappears, returning with Guanyin and Xiwangmu themselves at his side.

Guanyin: "When Nezha told me you were due - I certainly did not expect to come here! It's been some time." MK, Wukong & Macaque: "Same!"

It seems that the second MK is assured everything is prepared; the Egg pretty much shoots out - cracked and ready to go. The other monkeys barely have time to collect the broken rainbow-quartz shell when the baby starts howling to the universe.

The Room: (*stunned silent*) Newborn Haoye: (*immediately chirping and clinging to MK*) Macaque: "Wow. That kid did not wait at all to be born." Wukong: "Stress from the courtnapping probably scared him out." (*angry growls radiate around the room. Ruyi will be lucky to be found alive after tonight.*) Red Son & MK: (*both unintelligible blubbering*) "He is so small!!" "And orange!"

Xiwangmu nearly roars at seeing her great-grandcub alive and so loud. Her fellow great-grandparents do not hesistate to embrace the Empress when she hugs them out of joy. ("He's beautiful!" "He is!" "His taigong would have adored him!" "Did he get his fur from you Empress?")

The Underworld and the Celestial Realm are united fully in this moment... all for a tiny orange puffball who's barely a minute old.

Tang faints obviously. Pigsy holds it together long enough to say hi to his grandpiglet before passing out on the nearest sofa. Wukong and Macaque get a few sniffs in before joining Pigsy on the sofa.

All is calm.

Then Haoye sneezes and rainbow-coloured flames shoot out.

The Room: ( 0_0)? MK, laughing nervously: "Oh yeah. The Five Stones! Ha ha ha-!" Nezha, defusing: "To be fair... I spit rainbows." Mei, taking photos: "Aww, our little rainbow monkey man!!" <3

Now the baby has another set of great-grandparents to visit!

If one of the Man Yue gifts is a familar ox skull - MK doesn't comment on it.

[switchypanic]

Sentence Starter: "I didn't actually want you to stop…"

Content Warnings: One brief sex joke (because this is LUCIFER we are talking about) and tooth-rotting fluff between Lucifer and Lilith.

Word Count: 759 words.

"I didn't actually want you to stop..."

There were many things about Lucifer that Lilith enjoyed. His handsome features, his love of ducks, his tendency to dream big, his protective streak. However, one of her absolute favorite things about him was his smile. Whenever she saw it, it made her day ten times better, even in the dark underworld of Hell. As such, she made it her mission to make him smile as often as possible.

Now, this wasn't always easy. Being king came with a number of stressors, especially with the angels constantly breathing down his neck, and there were days were Lucifer came across as a man on the brink of losing it. However, over their many decades together, Lilith had found more than a few ways to put a smile back on her beloved's face.

The first was attention. Lucifer was, and always had been, an attention whore. The man ate up any love and affection his wife was willing to give, returning it tenfold.

The second was their daughter. No matter how bad of a day he was having, seeing that fanged smile on their little toddler's face always had Lucifer cracking up, cooing over how much she looked like her mother (Lilith couldn't see it; Charlotte was Lucifer's spitting image).

The third method, however, was her favorite, and what brought her to her current situation.

Lucifer had been having another hard week. He had a ton of meetings to attend with the other sins, another Extermination coming up, and Charlotte had been sick, making the poor man worry himself half to death. While their daughter was getting better, and Lucifer had managed to get all of his business wrapped up in a somewhat neat manner, he was still stress beyond belief. As such, Lilith had taken it upon herself to improve her husband's mood the best way she knew how.

However, what she HADN'T been expecting was the downright pitiful look her gave her when she had finally stopped, followed by that fateful sentence uttered just under his breath.

"N-Now darling, surely we can talk about this?" Lucifer stammered, a nervous grin nearly splitting his face in two. He had his hands raised in front of him, eyes locked onto hers warily. "I-I was just kidding! And I'm not sad anymore, see? I'm smiling!" He chuckled awkwardly; Lilith wasn't convinced in the slightest.

"For the devil himself, you're an awful liar." The demoness teased, delighting in the way her husband's cheeks turned a bright pink. She took a step closer, mouth curling into a playful smirk.

Lucifer took a step back, his shoulders already shaking with barely contained titters. "Lilith, my love! Light of my life! You don't gotta do this! There's other ways to cheer me up; ways that would be pleasurable for you, too?"

He was trying to seduce her, a tactic that would usually work. However, seeing him already starting to crumble before she had even laid a hand on him only made Lilith all the more eager to execute her plan.

"Nice try, sweetie, but I'm craving something else today, as you are already well aware." Lilith took another stride closer, beginning to close the gap between them. The king attempted to back away again, but his legs wouldn't move, knees feeling like jello. Oho, the way that woman could disarm him with a single word or glance! "Besides, we both know you MEANT what you said. You want to get wrecked that badly, hm? I'm more than happy to indulge you, you know."

The woman reached out, taking her husband by the arm and pulling him closer. She wrapped him in an embrace before turning him around, holding the shorter demon against her chest. "Oh my, you're a mess today, aren't you?" She crooned.

Lucifer squirmed against her, biting back a flustered whine as his heart hammered in his chest. "Lilith..." He mumbled softly. "Come on, don't tease me! You did enough of that earlier, didn't you?"

"There's no such thing as too much teasing." The woman chuckled, pressing a kiss to her husband's neck. "So, you'd rather I just go all out, hm?" Lilith asked, smirk growing as she heard his breath catch in his throat. "Well, if you insist..."

"Wait wait wait, that's not what I-" Lucifer was cut off by a startled squeal, feeling his wife's hands begin to squeeze at his sides firmly and quickly. He bit his lower lip, trying desperately to hold in his giggles. "Lilith, nohohohoho!"

And he failed pretty much immediately.

[chonggen]

Quick new Oc

Really quick, she only took me 12hr. And behold my new art style.

Full name: Jia Zhutao (or just Tao)

Species: Hong Niang / Cat demon (she used to be a human before being a cat demon)

Gender: Female

Age: 1000+

Weapon(s): A fan like kunai

Home: Underworld

Alias(es): Ten Kings, Celestial Realms (except Li Jing, bc he wants to lock her up in the pagoda), Nine-headed Demon

Affiliation(s): Ten Kings’ subordinate

Occupation(s): Memory scrolls’ manager, Ten Kings’ diplomat, Soul seeker and attractor

Likes: Oleander, Meng Po Soup, cats, mortal realm, Yu Lan Festival, mortals’ celebrations

Dislikes: coriander, smelly food, dogs, work

Family: Jian Dumu - Twin brother

Friend(s): Nine-headed Demon, Meng Po, Nezha

Enemies: Li Jing

Status: dead? or it counts alive?

Abilities:

Hallucination- Tao can make it into visual, auditory, pain, etc. It is mainly used to suppress out-of-control souls. It can also be used on humans and demons, and they cannot be relieved by themselves. And also can create the phantom of objects, places, but she mainly create the souls’ family members to guide them and bring them to Meng Po.

Shape shifting- Tao can transform into cats, human, also can transform into the family member of the souls that completely out-of-control to appease them. Except the special case she mainly use it to go to the mortal realm.

Ability of seeing the wraiths (cursed souls)- Wraiths unlike the normal ghosts or souls, wraiths will only appear in people who have committed serious sins, which means that these people are the targets of her soul seek. And the wraiths only appear in the mortal realm and won’t appear in the underworld.

Teleportation- Tao can teleport to anywhere, but it only can be used at work or at the Yu Lan Festival (that festival is her vacation). And when she teleports a bunch of oleander petals appear.

Puppetry- Tao can possess people just like the Lady Bone Demon, but only can possess two at the same time.

Soothe the nerves- Tao has a scent that calms people down. The concentration of the smell can be adjusted, but if it is too strong it can cause coma.

Poisoned body- If Tao comes into physical contact with another person, they become poisoned and die immediately. However, it doesn't affect females or her brother.

Super hearing- Tao can locate sounds up to 100 meters away.

Personality:

She looks gentle, but she is a lazy person. Whenever she wanted to escape from work, she would go to Po Meng's place to be lazy. She doesn't work hard when searching for souls.

She’d never trust to the other except her friends, because during her lifetime, she was betrayed by her lover and sacrificed her twin brother. In order to no longer be betrayed by his lover and never devote himself wholeheartedly to a love, he also developed a habit of killing the other person after the love ended. Until she arrived in the underworld, became a soul seeker, and found her brother. No matter how close the relationship between the other party and her is, they can only become friends or besties at best.

[pompomqt]

Journey to the West Chapter 58

In this chapter of Journey to the West with @journeythroughjourneytothewest Sun Wukong faces off against his shadow self. So let's get into it shall we?

So Sandy and Monkey head off together towards Flower Fruit Mountain, with Monkey traveling much slower then his usual pace to keep pace with Sandy who is still suspicious of him. However Sandy's suspicions of Monkey are slightly allayed when they get there and find that there is indeed another Sun Wukong. Monkey takes the presence of this clone just as well as Sandy took it early- which is to say that he attacks the clone on sight.

The two are evenly matched, and even if Sandy wanted to try and get in the middle of that to try and give the real Wukong a leg up, he no longer knows which one the real one is. After watching the fight for a while, Sandy decides to make himself useful by trying to find their stuff, however he's unable to find where the false Wukong stashed them. Eventually Monkey calls out to Sandy to just go report back to Tripitaka, while he battles his way over to Guanyin's place so that she can help tell them apart. So Sandy head's back to Tripitaka, while Monkey, and fake Monkey heads for Guanyin.

The two Monkey's continue brawling in Guanyin's front yard, while one of her servants go to alert Guayin to the situation. When she comes out the two Monkey's give her a rundown of the situation, and ask her to tell them apart. So Guanyin has them separate from each other and has two of her servants grab them both while she recites the tight fillet spell. However when Guanyin starts reciting the spell they both act like they are in unbearable pain and beg her to stop, which she does. Now out of idea's, Guanyin tells them to go up to heaven so they can their problem instead of hers.

So Monkey and fake Monkey fight their way up to heaven, and once they've disturbed the peace enough to garner an audience, the two Sun Wukong's once again explain the situation and ask for an audience with the Jade Emperor, once it becomes clear that none of the gathered gods can tell the two apart either. The gods figure that they don't want to get in the middle of... whatever this is, and make way so the two of them can brawl their way to the Jade Emperor. The Jade Emperor isn't to happy about the two Sun Wukong's brawling in his palace, but since I doubt he wants beef with either of them, he just summons Prince Nezha's father, who brings with him an imp-reflecting mirror. They both stand before the mirror, however even in the reflection they can not be distinguished from each other. Since the Jade Emperor gave it his best shot and failed, it's time to pass the buck once again- this time they're going to go and bother Tirpitaka.

Meanwhile, Sandy has caught back up with Pigsy and Tripitaka and is giving them a run down of the situation. Tripitaka feels bad about accusing Monkey of something he didn't do, but apparently he doesn't feel to badly about, since once the two Monkey's crash down to earth, he has no problem whipping out the tight fillet spell to see if that will help. Which it of course doesn't. Although in his defense I guess he doesn't know that Guanyin already tried that. Anyways, as flattering as it is that they actually thought Tripitaka might be useful in this situation, it is once again time for them to become someone else's problem. Permanently if Tripitaka has anything to say about it, since although he knows about the clone now, that doesn't change the fact that the real Sun Wukong is the one who killed those bandit earlier. So Tripitaka is still mad at him and currently has no plans on taking him back on as a disciple.

That's a problem for later however. For now the two Monkey's decide to take their fight to the underworld to see if the Ten Kings have any insight into this situation. Tripitaka meanwhile tells Sandy that he should go back to Flower Fruit Mountain and check behind the waterfall for their stuff while the two Monkey's are preoccupied. Pigsy however volunteers to go in Sandy's place since he's been behind the waterfall before and will probably have better luck finding it.

Meanwhile the two Monkey's have made their way to the underworld. Some of the spirits manage to alert the Ten Kings about this issue, and the two Monkey's explain the current plot to them. Now knowing the situation the Kings bring forth the registry to see if it can help, unfortunately it's not very useful, partly because this is the very same registry Wukong himself vandalized about four immoralities ago. However unlike the last three groups they asked for for help, these guys actually have a plan B. They call forward a beast called 'Investigative Hearing' who has the ability to perceive true from false. And this beast actually does manage to learn the name of the imposter, but he can't reveal it here. For the imposter is actually as powerful as the real Sun Wukong, and would probably wreak havoc here in retaliation if they reveal him.

So instead the beast suggests that they take this problem up with the Buddha himself, since he'll likely both be able to tell them apart and actually do something about it. Both Monkey's agree to this new course of action and continue their fight to the Western Heaven, where Buddha is currently giving a lecture on why being of one mind is important. The Monkey's arrive just in time for the Buddha to point them out as examples of what happens if you are of two minds instead. Once again the two Monkey's settle down long enough to give the Buddha the recap episode of the last few chapters. And while none of Buddha's cohort's can tell the difference between the two, the Buddha can, and just as he's about to reveal it Guanyin arrives for this surprise lecture from her teacher.

Buddha asks Guanyin if she can tell the difference between the two Monkey's, and Guanyin confesses that she can not, and has come here to ask if Buddha can enlighten them on the situation. Buddha goes on to say that despite everyone's vast power and knowledge, none of them know everything. As they know, there are five kinds of immortals; the celestial, the earthbound, the divine, the human and the ghostly. And there are also five kinds of creatures; the short-haired, the scaly, the hairy, the winged, and the crawling. This imposter however does not fall into any of those ten categories. Instead he is one of four special primates that do not belong to any of these ten species.

The first special monkey is the intelligent stone monkey, aka Sun Wukong himself. Who knows transformations, recognizes the seasons discerns the advantages of earth and is able to alter the course of planets and stars. Next we have the red-buttocked baboon, who has knowledge of yin and yang, understands human affairs, is adept in it's daily life, and is able to avoid death and lengthen it's life. Then there's the third one, the bare-armed gibbon, who can seize the sun and moon, shorten a thousand mountains, distinguish the auspicious from the inauspicious and manipulate planets and stars. And finally we have the six-eared macaque who has a sensitive ear, discernment of fundamental principles, knowledge of past and future, and comprehension of all things.

Therefore the Buddha deduces that the imposter must be the six-eared macaque. Knowing that he's been made, the macaque tries to make a run for it, but Buddha's cohorts have him quickly surrounded. And when the macaque tries to shapeshift into a bee to slip past them, the Buddha traps him under and alms bowl. The macaque then reveals his true form, and Wukong immediately kills him. The Buddha isn't to happy about this, but Wukong explains that he was a criminal that assaulted and robbed his master, and would have been executed under the court of law anyways.

And I guess Buddha is willing to accept this logic, since instead of scolding him further he just tells him to go back to Tripitaka. Monkey however explains that Tripitaka doesn't want him anymore, and instead asks that the Buddha remove the fillet so he can just go home instead. Buddha however just says he'll send Guanyin with him to make sure that Tripitaka takes him back. So Guanyin and Wukong head back to where Tripitaka and Sandy are waiting. Guanyin explains about the six-eared macaque and tells Tripitaka to take Wukong back on as a disciple since he won't be able to reach the west without his protection. Tripitaka agree's and thanks Guanyin, meanwhile Pigsy arrives just in time to explain the other half of the situation. He's got their stuff back, and killed the imposter Tripitaka and Pigsy, who were just normal monkey's while he was at it. Which honestly, I'm surprised that Wukong wasn't upset about, those are his people after, and they were kind of forced to go along with all of this by the Macaque. Anyways, now that the story is completely wrapped up, Guanyin takes her leave, and together once again, the pilgrims continue on their Journey to the West.

Current Sun Wukong Stats: Names/Titles: Monkey, The Stone Monkey, The Handsome Monkey King, Sun Wukong (Monkey awakened to the void), Bimawen (Banhorseplague), The Great Sage Equal To Heaven and Pilgrim Sun. Immortality: 5 + 94,000 years Weapon: The Compliant Golden Hooped Rod Abilities: 72 Transformations, Cloud-Somersault, Ability to transform his individual hairs, super strength, Ability to Summon Wind, Water restriction charm, and the ability to change into a huge war form, ability to duplicate his staff, ability to immobilize others, the ability to put others to sleep, and the Fiery eyes and Diamond Pupils, intimidating horses, churning large bodies of water, sleeplessness, seizing the wind, enhanced smell, discerning good and evil within a thousand miles, Spirit Summoning, lock picking, object transformation, distance reduction, vanishing in a flash of light, super healing, transforming others, and Invisibility Demon Kill Count: 10 + Unknown Number of Minions Human Kill Count: 1039 God's Defeated: 23 + Unknown number Defeats: 7 Crime List: Robbery, Murder, Mass Murder, Arson, Theft, Coercion, Threatening a Government Official, Resisting Arrest, Assault, Forgery, Employee Theft, False Imprisonment, Impersonating a Government Official, Treason, attempted murder, failure to control or report a dangerous fire, desecrating a corpse, breaking and entering, trespassing, violating Tree Law, looting corpses, trading counterfeit goods, criminal threat, animal abuse, Assisting or Instigating Escape, Damage to Religious Property, contaminating a substance for human consumption, Identity Fraud, and Disorderly Conduct Cry Count: 9 + 3 fake cries Mountains Trapped Under: 4

Current Tang Sanzang stats: Names/Titles: River Float, Xuanzang, Tang Sanzang, Tripitaka and the Tang Monk Abilities: Curing Blindness, making branches point a certain direction (allegedly), reciting sutras, pretty privilege, memorization, Heart Sutra and Meditation. Cry Count: 30 Tight Fillet Spell Uses: 63 Paralyzed by fear: 6 Bandit Problems: 3 Kidnapped by demons: 9 Falling Off Horses: 10

Current Bai Long Ma Stats: Names/Titles: Bai Long Ma (White Dragon Horse), Prince of the Western Ocean, and third prince jade dragon of the dragon king Aorun Abilities: Transforming into a human, a water snake, and a horse, eating a horse in one bite, flight, Magic of Water Restriction, Singing, and Sword Dancing. Cry Count: 1 Crime List: Arson, and Grave Disobedience. Contributions to the plot: 3 Kidnapped by demons: 1

Current Zhu Wuneng Stats: Names/Titles: The Marshal of the Heavenly Reeds, Zhu Wuneng (Pig who is aware of ability), Zhu Ganglie, Pigsy, Idiot and Eight Rules. Weapon: Rake Abilities: 36 Transformations, parting water, fighting underwater, cloud soaring, size enhancement and CPR Demon Kill Count/Kill steals: 5 Kidnapped by Demons: 4 Human Kill Count: 1 Failed Flirtation/romances Attempts: 4 Cry Count: 2 Crime List: Sexual Harassment, Murder, Kidnapping, arson, defamation, Damage to Religious Property, contaminating a substance for human consumption, Identity Fraud, Theft and Forcible entry

Current Sha Wujing Stats: Names/Titles: The Curtain-Raising General, Sha Wujing (Sand Aware of Purity), Sandy and Sha Monk Weapon: Monster Taming Staff Abilities: Fighting underwater, Cloud soaring, and fetching water from a well. Demon Kill Count: 1 + Unknown number of minions. Kidnapped by Demons: 3 Human Kill Count: 1 Cry Count: 1 Crime List: Breaking a Crystal Cup, murder, desecration of a human corpse, Damage to Religious Property and contaminating a substance for human consumption

[onesaltybagel]

Finally talking about season 5 because I’ve been putting it off

Notes won’t be in order at all and are mostly about the final episodes

Spoilers BOGOOA BOOO!!!!

When people were saying that Sean had really gone all out this season, I was like “oh ok maybe there’s a kinda sad scene or a really heartfelt scene”. NO. I WAS SO WRONG. I was NOT prepared for the scene of him screaming and wailing to the point of his voice cracking and going raw because he wanted Mk to stop so badly. I did not ever imagine I was going to see that and I’m still not over it. If I see it again, I get chills every time and I’m in love.

Nine-headed demons full form is so cool! I can’t believe we saw that before the trailer even dropped and I thought nothing of it! I thought it was just going to be another guardian of the stone! God the designs in this show rock

Mk saying “don’t make me do this” was perfect. It was so quiet, so small and full of emotion. Had he planned since that first moment he was going to use the circlet? He knew since like episode two that he was going to be doing something EVERYONE wouldn’t want him to do and- presumably- it became clear really fast to him what that was. Was he planning all along?

I cannot stress this enough- THE FIGHT IN EPISODE ONE FORESHADOWED THE FIGHT IN EPISODE NINE.

Nuwa saying I’m so proud of you, her voice actor is completely perfect for her. It was so soft and gentle :(((

Mk crying from joy. He should never have to be in that position, it is so unfair that he was created just to die- over and over and over again. I’m so glad he found another way.

Nuwa saying “my sacrifice AND yours” what did she sacrifice? When she fixed the pillar the first time, was she the one that entered the pillar to fix the sky along with the stones?

WHERE IS NUWA EXACTLY??? Is that just what- the inside of the pillar looks like?

Will we see Nuwa again?

Oh my GOD Wukong catching Mk made me want to throw up. That little bit where we see it through Mk’s eyes kills me every single time.

People gaining elemental powers? Is that- every person who didn’t already have any? Like- some went into Red son did he gain MORE power like that one fire sneeze girl or is he the same? If he is, he’ll be mad LMAO

The chaos HHUUUGHGHGHB ITS SO PRETTY? I don’t know if it’s supposed to be unnerving but I want to stare at it for hours it’s so cool. Where is that? Outside the universe? How does the chaos affect things? WHO IS “HE?” I looked up Xiangliu and the only person I could associate that with was Gonggong who is another snake like entity.

Gonggong also knocked one of the eight pillars (theres eight?) holding up the sky and ends up dying in a battle with someone called Zhurong who is a fire god and has some story with Nuwa!

They’re all snakes. What is with snakes in this world?

Was Macaque still investigating? At the end, he’s in the court room again for some reason and at the start of the season he said he was looking around for stuff related to Mk. Macaque is a hero and he cannot deny it anymore.

Oh yeah the ten kings of the underworld are dead. What the fuck happens to dead people now?

Why does Macaque have chaos magic, who did he make a deal with and WHY WAS IT ON THE STAFF.

Li Jing is a complete asshole. If we’re basing him off canon then there’s no return but if him vandalising his son’s grave ISNT CANON, then he’s just bad dad. I hope he trips and falls over and embarrassingly gets a bruise on his forehead.

Nuwa x Lady Bone Demon toxic Yuri <33

I love Nuwa but I also hate her sm right now. Why did there have to be a cycle? Because there needed to be someone to fix the sky? Because that person would never be enough and they weren’t fixing the sky they were resetting it all instead? This is down to Nuwa underestimating the world- we see that- but I just cannot get over that she made a baby for the sole purpose of dying. He gets up, he gets the stones, he dies. He experiences nothing, he speaks to no one.

And Mk has absolutely had that life a thousand times.

But she doesn’t react as emotionally as I wished she had. This is nothing against the writers, I am just a Nuwa hater and lover rn. She was perfect, so cool, such an amazing character but she still needs to pay child support.

[ryin-silverfish]

An informal translation of the Chinese dub dialogues in LMK S5 trailer

Sth I did on Discord earlier today. May as well put it here, with a few annotations.

Heavy spoilers under cut.

"The Ten Courts of Ksitigarbha has summoned you here to answer for your evil deeds. Do you three acknowledge your crimes?"

[地藏十殿 is referencing how in JTTW, Bodhisattva Ksitigarbha/Dizang is technically the boss of the Ten Kings of the Underworld.]

Li Jing: "I should take over all affairs in the Celestial Realm."

Ten Kings: "And this…is Devaraja Li Jing, the Pagoda King."

MK: "Nezha's dad?! Nezha, is your dad becoming the new JE?"

"But there is one thing that can bring the Great Sage Equal to Heaven to his knees/make him submit..."

Li Jing: "Don't you lot try to escape again!"

"Thou shalt be condemned for thy destruction of tis' world!"

"Right now, the damage caused to the Pillar of Creation is irreversible."

MK: "Wait a sec, what exactly is the Pillar of Creation?"

"This world's functioning depends on it."

[创世之柱 likely draws inspiration from "Nvwa patching the sky" mythos, where the water god Gonggong, after losing his battle against Zhuanxu or Zhurong, knocked over Mt. Buzhou, the sky pillar with his head.]

"Whatever happens, we'll always find a way, right?"

Mei: "It seems to have something to do with…rocks?"

"Regardless of whether there is some sort of secret conspiracy, the people we trusted are all by our side!"

SWK: "Everything will be okay, MK."

"There is something deep inside you that you cannot control..."

"What we gotta do is collect the Five-colored Stones, repair whichever parts that need repairing, and return everything to normal at last!"

"Here…comes…Monkey Kid!"

Red Son: "Let's put the topic of Divine Beasts aside for a sec, Dragon Girl. Distant water cannot put out a nearby fire——"

[远水救不了近火, a Chinese idiom that basically means "a slow remedy cannot resolve an emergency".]

Mei: "My codename is Long Dongqiang! Long-dong-qiang-dong-qiang…(humming)"

[隆咚锵咚锵, a Chinese onomatopoeia for drum + gong sounds. Mei is also making a pun here of her Chinese surname, Long.]

[Edit: the onomatopoeia is also used in a CNY song, 七个隆冬锵咚锵.]