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I am still in escape-from-reality mode, so have an essay on John being smart, I guess?
I loved this photo of the shuttle interior, though of course I can't view it without sparing a few thoughts for the crew who lost their lives for our quest to be free from being trapped in our one, beautiful, complicated, suffering planet.
But what it made me think about next was Farscape, of course. It's so briefly mentioned, and never referred to again, but the Farscape mission was John's third trip to space, minimum. He'd been on two previous space shuttle missions. And they must have been significant and successful roles because he was commander for the Farscape project. So this overwhelming morass of switches and readouts was familiar to him. He could probably name what every control did, what every blinking button meant.
John's ability to adapt so quickly to alien technology doesn't seem so improbable when you consider how much Earth technology he was used to dealing with. He struggled mostly with the stuff that had no labels or details to guide him, like handles that turn unintuitively back and forth instead of up and down, or doors that open by waving the right way at specific unmarked spots. (I feel like PK techs also found the doors of Leviathans baffling because they engineered specific glowy pads for all of Talyn's doors.)
I'm positive that John knew every subsystem on this shuttle. There's a reason they let a guy go up to space in a ship of his own design, and it's not just because he's the son of a famous astronaut. (Good for publicity at a time when the space program was struggling for mind share and funding.) He might use half his brain for pop culture and Aeryn, but the rest of it was more than enough to make John that rare super genius who can put his math and science into practical use building shit. So of course the vast majority of the time we see John being idle, he's taking something apart or putting it back together.
When he goes back home, John claims not to understand how the hetch drive works, "he just installed it", but his friends know that's bullshit. Of course John knows how most of it works, but he doesn't have full grasp of the math and science because he's had to deduce everything from tinkering and an under-trained Pilot without full grasp of the science himself. John is being coy partly to not bias what other scientists can figure out from their own experiments and partly because he doesn't want to get stuck all day every day being interrogated for his knowledge. Kinda been there, done that.
But anyway, this picture made me think things, about Earth tech, and our wonderful, adaptable human in the wilds of constant space magic and a hundred species worth of tech....
(Okay, just one more rant: I'm convinced Aeryn becomes a tech herself at least partially because she hangs out with John a lot, and she hates being idle, so she started messing with tech too.
I can just see him opening something up and asking a lot of questions that irritate her because she has no idea why any of her equipment works and it has never been necessary to know how to fix it, yet the way he asks questions makes her feel ignorant. But then after he pokes around enough to figure out what the red squiggly button does, he shows her and wants her to understand it too. Which she wouldn't be interested in, except she can shut him up faster if she makes him show her how to put it back together, freeing him up to go play with the next thing that catches her eye.
Or he'll go into this rant about how this particular thing is always breaking and should really be redesigned and she tells him she'll fix it, again, just to shut him up.
Because she quietly loves being in his frittery, high energy presence; there's enough John to fill up a squad's worth of space and he helps her feel less lonely on this giant empty tomb of a ship. But she wishes he talked less because she can't not pay attention to him and three quarters of what he says is nonsense. John earnestly messing around with something too intent to even talk is perfect. She'll happily sit there and clean parts or do the tedious soldering if he just limits himself to occasional mutters and "youreekas!", whatever that means.
John, of course, being a super genius, eventually figures out the pretty girl will sit with him all day--really close to him actually, their knees will bump a lot--if he tells her he really needs help assembling backup circuits or whatever. But only if he shows her how to do it once, provides minimal feedback from there, and limits himself to two Earth pop culture references per arn.)
Flight Deck of the Space Shuttle Columbia image credit: Eric Long/Smithsonian Institution                          National Air and Space Museum
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Midnight Pals: Dark Days Coming
King: hey guys sorry i'm late King: i just could not get up this morning King: feels like I've been sleeping for days King: what did i miss? King: how did the election go? Lovecraft: not too bad King: King: oh no King: oh no oh no oh no
Lovecraft: don't worry steve it won't be so bad Lovecraft: I've heard assurances from the new regime that they only want the trade unionists King: King: King:
Lovecraft: i mean really steve Lovecraft: how bad could it be? [meanwhile] Donald Trump: we're gonna have the biggliest boot stamping on a human face forever Trump: we love the boot stamping on the human face forever, don't we folks? Trump: more and more people are saying they love the boot
Lovecraft: you're overreacting steve Lovecraft: what's trump even going to do? King: well i'm glad you asked King: [unrolls comically long scroll] Lovecraft: oh is this going to be a song
King: well for starters King: decimate reproductive rights King: LGBTQ rights King: labor rights King: civil rights King: accelerate climate change Lovecraft: [sweats] this is making me feel bad steve Lovecraft: i can't wait for trump to outlaw you telling me this stuff!
King: use the military to brutalize americans King: abandon Ukraine King: and as for gaza George Romero: in all honesty steve Romero: that probably won't change much King: oh look! an optimist!
Lovecraft: ok but Lovecraft: has he actually SAID he's going to do any of that? King: yes Lovecraft: oh he was probably just lying Lovecraft: he lies a lot Poe: he does lie a lot
Lovecraft: i think you're overreacting, he's probably not gonna do all the stuff he says he's gonna do King: so you don't believe him? Lovecraft: nope! King: king: then what's his appeal? Lovecraft: well he's just so honest
Lovecraft: a real straight shooter Lovecraft: tells it like it is Lovecraft: says what he means King: King:
King: howard please tell me you didn't vote for trump did you? Lovecraft: [sweats] steve! please! Lovecraft: i'm only a loveable archie bunker style racist Lovecraft: i'm still 100% yang gang King: King: King: i picked a bad day to quit cocaine
King: i really need some cocaine King: edgar you know where i can get some cocaine don't you Poe: steve stay strong Poe: you don't need cocaine King: just one bump King: to get me through the next four years King: i mean few days King: no i mean four years
King: how about a beer? i was an alcoholic too you know King: maybe i'll take that up again King: this is good drinking weather Poe: steve no Poe: dean help me hold him back King: don't try to stop me! Poe: no steve! you've got so much to live for! King: yeah? like what? Poe: well Poe: you've got a loving family King: Joe is pretty great Koontz: and owen! King: King: yeah and owen is alright too i guess
King: yeah he's pretty good King: what the heck, i can say it King: i love owen too! Koontz: and there's naomi too King: whoa wait a second, i have THREE kids?? King: this just keeps getting better!
King: thanks guys i do feel a little better Poe: good, hold onto that Poe: cuz it's going to be a long four years Lovecraft: only four years? i thought we weren't gonna have to vote anymore! Poe: Poe: good drinking weather, huh?
Joyce Carol Oates: huh, i really don't see why the electorate would hate trans people unless they were persuaded by hate speech and fearmongering JK Rowling: well well well look at the fancccy pantsss rich author Rowling: with her out of touch fancccy ideasss about a pluralissstic sssociety! Rowling: with her fancccy german automobile! Oates: this car was made in Guatemala
Rowling: you're clearly too rich to underssstand the feelingsss of the common man Rowling: unlike me, a true daughter of the proletariat Rowling: i know all about the material needsss of the underclassss Rowling: anyway i'm going to insulate my Scottish castle with big bags of money
#midnight pals#the midnight society#midnight society#stephen king#edgar allan poe#hp lovecraft#dean koontz#jk rowling#joyce carol oates#george romero
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I Hate You, I Love You- part 4
Part 1. Part 2. Part 3.
Summary: Christmas Eve with your family leads you to have a certain revelation.
WC: ~2.5k
You and your âgirlfriendâ make it down the steps with your fingers interlaced, and you seriously hate the way that it makes you feel things that you know you shouldnât be feeling for Melissa. You hate her- or youâre supposed to. No, you do. You have to. You always have, and you always will.Â
Still, you walk down the steps with a practiced ease. Nobody is here yet though, so you take a spot on the couch with your dad while Melissa opts to kiss your cheek and let you know that sheâs going to see if thereâs any last minute jobs in the kitchen. Your eyes once again linger on the red haired womanâs hips as she makes her way into the kitchen.
Your father coughs awkwardly to gain your attention.
âHm?â
âKid, you really have it bad for her, donât you?â your dad chuckles.
You shrug. âI donât know.â
âI think you do,â he leans over and wraps an arm around you. You canât but lean into his embrace. âI havenât seen anyone look at you like that, and I havenât seen you look at anyone the way you do Melissa sinceâŚâ
âSince Todd,â you whisper. Your dad nods silently. You look to him with vulnerable eyes. âSheâs⌠sheâs something alright.â
âIn the best ways, yes?â your father prompts quietly.
You just nod, and then your âgirlfriendâ is making her way into the room, yet another glass of wine in hand for you. She settles in next to you on the couch, drapes an arm around you, and rests her head on your shoulder.
âMom didnât have anything for you to do in there?â you ask her quietly as you kiss red hair.
âHer and Jo are flying around like chickens with their heads cut off in there. I figured I would be more of a hindrance than a help,â Melissa chuckles softly.
Itâs a bit later that your family comes in, and youâre forced to introduce Melissa as your girlfriend to everyone there. She smiles and shakes hands, works her charm, and you can tell that your family is loving having the redhead there. Youâre given quite a few impressive hums and thumbs ups as your family makes their way in. The redhead stays close to you as your family members come in. Her hand is always on some part of your body, whether that be on your back, your shoulder, or your hands are entwined. You donât hate it.
Light conversation is made, just pleasantries and catching up on life at first as everyone makes their way in. You donât engage much, trying to keep Melissa in the loop with who is who.
But then you settle in for dinner, Melissa on your right, and most eyes turn to you.
âWhat?â you ask with a raised brow. âIs there something you all know that I donât?â
Your Uncle Ron laughs. âKid, I think itâs that you know something the rest of us donât.â When you give him a blank stare in return, he gestures to Melissa.
âI already introduced you all to her,â you roll your eyes. âThis is Melissa, my girlfriend.â
âAnd?â you Aunt Betty prompts. âHow did you meet? When did you realize you two had a thing for each other? How long have the two of you been dating? You know, other stuff like that?â
âAm I being interrogated?â you question with a brow raised, the other furrowed. When your family just continues to look at you with bated breath, you huff out, âYou guys are ridiculous.â
Melissa playfully rolls her eyes and sets a gentle hand on your knee. âCâmon, babe. If you wonât tell âem, I will.â
Both of your eyebrows creep up your forehead, and you gesture for her to continue. âBe my guest, hun.â
So Melissa takes a breath and begins. âI started workinâ at Abbott a while ago⌠longer ago than I really care tâadmit. Anâ I really only had a couple of friends at work. Nobody really seemed worthy of getting to know. Until⌠Y/N. I usually hate newbies, and I wasnât willing to make an exception for my new grade level partner, but there was something about her. Something in the way that she stood up for what she thought was right, the way she speaks to the children and holds them to the highest expectations while still providing them with unconditional love and care. Somehow, Y/N wormed her way into my heart- as a professional. And then slowly, as she started to let more of herself shine through, I found myself entranced with her.â Green eyes are trained on you, and you can see the amount of love she has for you- fake love. âI found myself slowly fallinâ for her.â
She presses a soft kiss to your cheek, and you have to cough awkwardly to let out the gasp that your body wants to release. She said those words in such a convincing way that you almost believe her. Unbeknownst to you, her words are genuine.Â
âAnd when did the two of you finally get your heads out of your asses and start dating?â your father asks.
âIt took a while, but I broke down her walls, walls I would usually have up myself. But weâve been dating since almost the beginning of this school year when I finally just made a move, and I havenât been happier,â Melissa tells your family as she continues to look at you in a lovesick way. âI ainât lettinâ her go any time soon.â
The blush in your cheeks is clear now. You smile and press a quick kiss to her lips before sighing. âEnough about us though.â And then you turn your attention to your cousin and her new job.
Melissa insists on helping clean up dinner and bring out desserts. Of course she does, because sheâs the perfect fake girlfriend. Maybe she isnât though, because that means that youâre obligated to help. You donât do much- you never do much to help clean up after a day of cooking. So instead, you keep your arms around your âgirlfriendâsâ waist and rest your chin on her back. Every so often, youâll kiss her shoulder blade or detach yourself briefly to take a sip of the sangria she had poured for you.
Before you can even think about going to the dessert table for the two of you, the redhead has taken it upon herself to make you up a plate, and she takes some for herself. She knows that you prefer to have tea with your dessert as opposed to coffee that is normally offered. Melissa saunters over to the teapot and fills it with hot water for you. In no time flat do you have your favorite desserts and a warm mug of chai tea to warm your already soothed soul.
But then everything is cleaned, desserts are handed out to the rest of your family, and youâre settling on the couch again. Melissa sits first, and then she practically tugs you into her lap. Itâs warm, itâs cozy. You canât deny that your bodies fit together well.
She seamlessly places herself into your family, and you hate it. You hate the fact that she knows just what to say and do to win over your family. You hate that sheâs warm and loving, and sheâs being the exact opposite of the woman you know. You sit quietly with her as she jokes with your cousins, completely lost in thought. There was something about the way that your father told you that you had it bad for the redhead next to you and the looks that she was giving you at dinner. Your whole body tenses as you realize: you just might be falling for this side of Melissa.
âHun?â the redhead furrows her brow and turns to you, concerned. âYou okay?â
Of course she would notice the rigidness in your body. You blink a few times before putting on that practiced easy smile of yours. âYeah, just got a chill.â
âI can fix that.â Your colleague shifts you off of her slightly before standing and fetching a blanket from the bin. She settles back into the cushions before draping the throw over the two of you. For good measure, she pulls you in close, wrapping her arms around you, and kisses your head. âCanât have my girl cold, now can I?â
Your favorite cousin just glances at you with a smirk, and then she looks at Melissa and makes a whip noise. Your âgirlfriendâ scoffs, but she presses another kiss to your head as you rest it on her shoulder.
Itâs a long while before you finally decide that you need some sleep. Christmas morning may be a lazy morning in your house, but itâs always an early morning.Â
With a soft sigh, you turn to the redhead next to you. âYou about ready to head up?â
âYeah, if you are,â she mumbles into your hair.
The two of you climb the steps, and youâre oddly quiet as you prepare for bed. Once all of your makeup is washed away and youâre changed, Melissa is already in bed with her glasses on the tip of her nose and scrolling through her phone.
You crawl under the covers and sigh deeply.
âPenny for your thoughts?â your colleague asks you softly.
You hum. You canât tell her that your mind is whirling with thoughts of how you may actually be falling for this side of her- not the real Melissa, but this fake Melissa that sheâs come up with for this elaborate lie of yours. âJust tired. Today was a lot.â
âYeah,â the redhead chuckles. âBut your family is real nice, and I think they believe weâre together.â
You just nod and turn on your side facing away from her. âNight.â
âGoodnight,â Melissa tells you. You donât see the way that she looks at you longingly. You donât see the way that her eyes go soft as she glances at you laying in bed next to her, how her green orbs clearly convey that she wants to wrap her arms around you and hold you tight the way that she has been all night. No, your back is turned to her as your mind goes a mile a minute thinking about what you think you may be feeling.
You feel the redhead shift to lay down in the bed a few minutes later, and the glow of her phone disappears as she sets it on the nightstand. A couple seconds later you hear her glasses being folded and deposited next to her phone.
Melissa lays down in the bed on her side, but sheâs facing you. Itâs not her fault, thatâs just how sheâs always slept- on her right side. And itâs not like you know sheâs facing you. It takes everything in her to not cozy up behind you and pull you against her. Instead, she closes her eyes and hopes that she doesnât snore tonight.
When youâre certain the redhead beside you is asleep, breathing evenly, you turn as gently as you can in the bed to face her. Sheâs⌠sheâs beautiful. She looks so at peace. Thereâs a lot of things you can say about Melissa Schemmenti, but unattractive is not one of those things. In this moment, you can allow yourself to daydream about what a life with this version of Melissa might be like- sheâs treated you like a princess since getting to your parentsâ house, a far cry from how she acts around you at Abbott.
As you drift off to sleep, the cliched sugar plum fairies donât dance around in your head. No, instead you dream of what you think might be an ordinary day with Melissa in your life as your partner, and not just your fake one.
The two of you share a wonderful, homemade breakfast together in her house, she drives you to work, kisses are stolen in the break room and in the classroom. And while she still has the edge to her that Miss Schemmenti has, thereâs still that sparkle of the warmth that sheâs shown you she has outside of work. You find that when she makes a snarky comment in your dream, you donât hate it. You donât even dislike it. You can hear yourself chuckling in your dream. That image blurs into another, and youâre just laying on the couch. A shimmer catches your eye as you lay on her, hand resting on her collarbone. Thereâs a sparkling ring set on your finger. When you look down, thereâs a matching one on her own left hand. You hear a baby crying from just up the way, and you sigh.Â
Melissa just buries a kiss in your hair. âI got it if she doesnât settle in the next five minutes.â When the crying doesnât stop, your⌠is she your wife now in this dream? Your wife shimmies you off of her and heads up the steps. A few moments later, she returns with a little girl in her arms, one that is a spitting image of you.
âOh honey,â you instinctively reach for the two year old, at least thatâs where you would estimate she is in age.
âBaby girl just wanted Momma,â Melissa rolls her eyes playfully. âNever Ma, always Momma, ainât that right, Sara?â
The little girl just gives a toothy grin as she lays her head on your shoulders.
You sit upright in the bed as your dream jolts you awake. Your heart is racing. Why were you married to Melissa? Why did you have a child together? What the fuck? The redhead beside you doesnât so much as stir, still fast asleep. The breath is taken from your lungs as you realize: youâre actually falling for Melissa Schemmenti.
When you wake up for the second time that day, you once again wake with a jolt. Your arms are wound around Melissaâs waist, your face is buried in her chest, your limbs are intertwined with hers. Her arm is slung over your own body.
The woman next to you just groans and pulls you closer. You canât deny that sheâs warm. You canât deny that you donât hate waking up like this. Itâs comfortable, and you donât wake up freezing your ass off for once.
âLis,â you mumble.
âShut up, and go back to sleep,â she grumbles. She buries a kiss in your hair. Okay, you know sheâs still half asleep. She wouldnât do that if she was fully awake and it was just the two of you. And while her telling you to shut up would normally infuriate you to no end, you donât seem to mind this time. You settle back into her hold with a soft sigh and allow your eyes to flutter shut again. Christmas morning and presents can wait if it means you'll get some extra time in the warmth of your colleague.
TAGS (and let me know if you want to be added): @schemmentis @thesapphictimelady @marvel210 @itisdoctortoyousir @morgana-larkin @doesthatsuggestanythingtoyou @marvels--slut @sweetcheeksschemmenti @megamultifandomtrashposts @lemz378 @http-sam @melissaschemmentisbranzino @imaginesmultifandoms @sexysapphicshopowner @lilfartbox1 @maybe-a-humanbean @imlike-so-gaydude @a-queen-and-her-throne @notinmyvocab @melanielaufeyson @dvrkhcld @cosmichymns @sasheemo @m1lflov3rrr @ricejucie @temilyrights @emilynissangtr @squinnchy @dopenightmaretyphoon @emeraldoceansstuff @shinyfaerielights @blkmxrvel @marvelwomenrule @sarahjohannson @casualfoxwitch @therightdimple
#abbott elementary#abbott elementary fanfiction#abbott elementary fanfic#melissa schemmenti#melissa schemmenti fanfic#melissa schemmenti x reader#melissa schemmenti x you#melissa schemmenti fanfiction
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! `'what I think mha boys would be like together'` !
Just some of my headcanons of what I think some mha boys would be like in a relationship with reader :3 (might do a girl vers of this) or a part 2 of this one
contains: Izuku x reader, Katsuki x reader, Kirishima x reader, Denki x reader, fluff
Izuku :
Izuku is definitely the one to compliment/ praise you over everything, oh you styled your hair different than usual? âYou look so pretty/handsomeâ or you finally finished that book/game/drawing youâve been trying to complete âthatâs amazing Y/N!â. Mostly uses your first name but he does have some nicknames for you; mostly being shortened versions of your first name along with âMy star, lovey, babeâ, is anxious to make first moves on anything but if you initiate something (holding hands, a kiss, etc.) heâll join in when you initiate it; though when he does get the confidence to initiate something itâs mostly holding hands or snaking his arm around your waist lightly grazing your hip. Loves giving you little head kisses, cheek kisses! Makes you little paper dolls of you two for special occasions <3
Katsuki :
Heâd definitely not change much when heâs dating you, maybe more softer towards you than the others but other than that Katsuki is still the same olâ Katsuki. Gets you gifts on special occasions (he knows exactly what you like and dislike cause heâs been sneakily analysing you so he could use it to an advantage) , helps you with choosing outfits, hairstyles etc. tries to sound less harsh when giving you advice but it can be sarcastic at times, only refers to you with your first name with the slight nicknames on cards or gifts but never from his lips, ruffles your hair and plays about with your hair (pleatting it, twirling it around his finger) doesnât wait for you to initiate anything- will initiate holding hands, kisses, cuddles first, Katsuki will boast about you, heâll just bring you up in every conversation like âMy Y/N done that too though better than youâ , âYeah Y/N knows that too, they knew way before you did extra!â Isnât one for showing PDA but shows a lot of affection privately in his words âItâs better being just the two of us than a crowd of extrasâ will not admit but he loves it when he lays on your lap and you play with his hair <3
Kirishima :
Kirishima would defoâs would be glued to your side helping you with anything, holding your hand and somewhat having his hand on you (shoulders, head, waist, nothing too intimate) asks you to join him when heâs working out, sometimes will ask you to even join in, non stop compliments- compliments are literally spilling from his lips heâs just so loving of you he canât help not to tell you how beautiful/handsome you are. Matching clothes. He would love to wear those matching shirts that have the arrows pointing to left/right saying things like âIâm hers/hisâ even if your not into that kinda stuff heâd even do things like matching pfp on socials! Kirishima would definitely listen to music with you, even if you both share different taste in music he wouldnât care as long as he gets to do something with you and learn more about you heâd love it <3
Denki :
I feel if anything heâd just get more funnier when heâs around you, he wants to hear your laugh whenever he does something stupid, loves to play video games with you (if you like them ofc) if not he just likes to have you around him whenever he does play games, will say silly lines like âwhatâs cooking good lookingâ and other lines, loves to play with your hair, hold your hand and trace over your bones and veins, Loves to lay on your lap whenever you guys hang out at one anotherâs dorms. Will ask for your help with anything especially if itâs for tests, loves to talk to you about everything, literally everything thereâs times heâll ask questions that really make you think where it takes you weeks to finally answer and heâs sadly forgotten his question.
Hope you enjoyed this <3 I might do other parts to this one but Iâm not sure yet ;-;.. but anyways Iâm working on a lil project that might take a bit so Iâm posting this just to not seem and inactive for long periods of time âď¸
#izuku x reader#katsuki x reader#kirishima x reader#denki x reader#mha#headcanon#smolzâs posts#part 2?
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Iâve been sitting with this for a couple days because I want to respond (hopefully) thoughtfully. And on the one hand, itâs a really good point and I can see how all the âI hate menâ stuff could wear on the guys who ARENâT, you know, raging assholes. But on the other hand, my forty years of lived experience is pushing back on that. Long-winded rant under the cut.
I have a fair amount of men in my life by choice- family, friends, boyfriend. The ones I choose to spend time with are, by and large, really good guys. Theyâve also heard more than their fair share of my own âI hate menâ rants, and to their credit theyâve never been upset about it. They know I donât mean them because my words and actions back it up, and they understand where Iâm coming from because they hear the stories accompanying said rants and generally agree with my assessment.
All this to say, as much as I sympathize with the good guys who have to listen to the âI hate menâ rants, I also very much donât, because they have arguably more power to help shift that narrative than I do. The shitty men of the world do not care that people think theyâre shitty, they are not changed by reason or logic. Men who, for example, sexually harass women donât (generally) hear the many, many stories from womenâs perspectives and have a lightbulb moment where they realize how wrong theyâve been. They will likely never be Ebenezer Scrooge throwing open the windows to wish the town poors a merry Christmas. But maybe, just maybe, if enough of the good guys start speaking up to call them on their behavior, that might have even a small effect on them.
âIt shouldnât be our responsibilityâ well no shit, grown adults shouldnât need to be spoon fed basic human decency, but here we are. Women telling men how much we hate being catcalled doesnât seem to be fucking working, so if the good guys arenât willing to try telling them, then Iâm out of ideas that arenât along the lines of Goodbye Earl.
One last thing, this is getting away from me. I work a public service job, and it involves a fair amount of face time with people needing help finding things and using stuff like printers. Iâm always polite and reasonably friendly, but itâs never anything beyond professionally kind. Even at that, itâs more than half of my interactions with men that leave me feeling uncomfortable. Iâve had men try to take my hand, Iâve had men ask if Iâm single thirty seconds into me walking to their computer to help, Iâve had men stand right behind my chair while Iâm looking something up. âWhy donât you just say something to them?â Because Iâm not trying to get assaulted or shouted at, Iâm trying to make it to the end of my shift and go home. Itâs extremely well documented that a lot of men donât handle rejection well, which ends with a lot of women getting assaulted or worse. And the thing about THAT is, you never know which men are gonna be the ones to lose their cool. So you just hedge your bets and tread carefully with everyone in case.
SO. What this very long-winded rant is saying, is that a lot of women encounter a lot of shitty men, and it sucks absolute donkey dick to deal with. If the good guys out there want to stop hearing about how terrible men are, they need to step the fuck up and help, because women are exhausted. The other, smaller, part that they might not like is that itâs not our job to constantly reassure them that I donât include them when I say âI hate menâ. If Iâm spending time with you, and trusting you with these stories or complaining or whatever, then go ahead and take it on faith that I donât mean you.
Maybe Iâm alone in feeling this way, I donât know. Just needed to get this out there.
I couldn't have said it better myself.
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Beautifully Cruel World-Chapter 10
Series Masterlist | Previous | Next
ABO Non-Idol Stray Kids Universe Poly OT8 x Reader 18+ MDNI
Warnings in the Series Masterlist as well as any other information needed
Warning: Smut First time I've ever written smut, so I'm sorry if it sucks (I'm updating the warnings in the series masterlist so this is the only other warning for smut from here on out)
Also want to let everyone know that with holiday seasons coming up, work is getting busier and I'm gonna be working more days than my normal here soon so it's gonna be a bit harder to write. I promise to update as often as possible and I'm gonna start adding dates next to the upcoming chapters in the masterlist on when they should be posted so refer to that.
thank you everyone for reading, now enjoy
Chapter 10
âHow was it?â Jisung asks after Y/n walks out of the office he was waiting for her in front of as she was talking with her therapist and psychiatrist and he can see the signs that sheâs been crying which doesnât surprise him.Â
âWeird.â She sniffles, wiping her nose with a tissue. âThey asked me a lot of mental health questions mostly, and they want to put me on anti anxiety meds for sure and maybe antidepressants.â
âItâs not too bad.â He takes her hand to lead her back to the lobby where Chan is waiting for them. âI was put on the same when I first started coming here. Still take the anxiety ones actually.â
âReally?â She looks at him surprised.Â
âYeah.â He nods his head. âI was homeschooled as a kid so I didnât socialize as much as I should have and it caused a lot of anxiety because of it. The only reason I know Chan and Changbin is because my dad worked for their dads originally. Really they were my only friends back then.â
âGood to know.â She nods, frowning.Â
âWhatâs wrong?â
âI just realized I donât actually know a lot about all of you guys, or how you all came to be.â She whispers, looking at the floor.Â
âWell feel free to ask questions whenever, weâll be happy to answer.â He squeezes her hand as they walk out into the lobby and Chan looks up at them.
âYou okay?â Chan stands as the two walk up to him and he pulls her into his side.Â
âYeah, it was just a lot.â She hands him the paper for her anti-anxiety prescription.Â
The alpha looks over it and sighs but understands and reads the note about possible antidepressants but they want to have more sessions with her to determine that.Â
âIâm gonna ask you like I had asked Ji when they wanted to prescribe him this too.â He moves her to look at him. âDo you want to be put on medication? Do you think it will actually help you?â
âI-I donât know. Iâve never taken stuff like this before.â She stutters. âBut Iâm wary because of the injections.â She then looks over at Jisung. âDoes it help you?â
âYeah, I think so.â He smiles at her. âI feel like Iâm able to get through the day easier with it. And donât worry, itâs nothing like how the injection was.â
Y/n nods her head still thinking about it and Chan tilts her head to look up at him. âHey, you can try them out for a bit and if you donât like how they make you feel or donât think theyâre helping then we can slowly get you off of it.â He reassures her. âWe did that with Jisung for his antidepressants.âÂ
âOkay.â She whispers. âIâll try it.âÂ
Chan goes and gets the prescription sent in to be picked up at the pharmacy in Stayville and picks it up on their way home.Â
ââşââ âž ââşââ
âBaby girl.â Chan stops the omega as she walks past his room and motions for her to come in. âIâve noticed youâve been in your head since we got home, talk to me.â He shuts the door after she walks in.
She sighs as he leads her to sit on his bed. âI just realized today that I donât actually know a lot about all of you.âÂ
âThatâs all?â He watches her closely as she nods her head. âBaby, all you have to do is ask us questions and weâll tell you anything you want to know.âÂ
âCan you tell me about your family and where you came from?â She asks shyly. âI remember Minho telling me that Hannah visits from Australia a lot. And Dr. Hajoon was calling you Chris.âÂ
âYeah.â He smiles and laughs a little as he sits next to her. âMy English name is Christopher. I was born here but was mostly raised in Australia. My dad went back and forth from there and here to help Changbinâs dad run the company. His dad retired so he and I handle the Korean office while my dad still runs the one there.â
The omega nods as she listens. âYour brother is an omega. What about Hannah? And your parents?â
âLucas is our only omega in my family pack too.â He smiled at her. âMy dad is an alpha and so is Hannah. My mom is a beta.â
âWould we ever be able to go visit Australia?â She whispers.
âOf course.â He lifts her head to look at him. âAs a pack we own a vacation house there so that Felix and I are able to visit our families often.â
Y/nâs jaw dropped. âHow did I not realize that Felix is also Australian?â
âI donât know, baby.â He laughs a bit. âFelix and I have known each other since we were kids. I taught him Korean and after I had moved and gotten settled here with Changbin, Jisung and Seungmin we moved him here.âÂ
âJi said you guys were the only friends he had since his dad worked for yours.â She looks over his facial features. âHow did everyone else come into the pack?â
âWell, Seungmin and I went to high school together here. I was his senior.â He smiles as she listens closely. âHe was a bit unsure of himself when he realized we were fated. I had to go up to him first and tell him about Changbin and Jisung, who I was living with and tell him about Felix back home.â
âMinho had run into Jisung at a caffe not far from the office. At the time Minho was a backup dancer for BTS but after meeting Ji and wanting to court him since he was his fated mate, he decided to stay in Seoul and started teaching dance. And Ji convinced him to meet the other four of us as he knew we were his fated mates too.â
âMin was a backup dancer for BTS?â Y/n gawks. âI donât believe it.â
âLook up some of their live performances, youâll see.â And she makes a mental note to do so later. âHyunjin and Jeongin met each other in school and knew they were each other's fated mates. Hyunjin had started taking classes from Min and even though they both realized they were fated mates, Jinnie was too scared of Minho to talk to him about it and Min wasnât about courting his student.â
Y/n couldnât help but laugh at how cute the whole situation is. âSo how did it finally happen?â
âFelix.â Chan smirks. âChangbin had dropped him off at the studio one day to bring Minho lunch and Hyunjin fell in love at first sight. After that Lix made Jinnie and Min talk and Hyunjin told them about Jeongin and they told him about the rest of us.â
âThatâs all really cute.â The omega gushes. âBest story ever.â
âI donât know.â He grins at her mischievously. âI think my favorite story is the one about how we met our omega.â He grabs her pulling her onto his lap so sheâs straddling him causing her to blush.
âChannie.â She pouts as he holds her hips and Y/n canât help but to glance down at his lips, thinking about what it would be like to kiss him.
Y/n starts to wonder if theyâre gonna claim her soon or not, thinking back to what her brother had told her, about them possibly just using her.
âYouâre thinking too much, baby girl.â The alpha grips her hips a bit tighter causing her to whine a little. âJust say it.â
âPlease.â She looks back and forth from his eyes to his lips.
âYouâve gotta say it.â She continues to pout though and he lightly spanks her ass. âCome on baby, I donât know what youâre wanting if you donât speak up.â
âPlease claim me, alpha.â She sounds disparate.
âFuck.â He growls, pulling her down to kiss her lips. âWasnât expecting that.â
The kiss is heated and passionate, he smirks at the small wines sheâs making. He spanks her again causing her to gasp and the alpha takes the opportunity to slide his tongue past her lips. She doesnât try to fight back with her tongue, already submitting to him.
He pulls away from the kiss and starts trailing kisses down her jaw to her neck, relishing in the little sounds she makes. He groans into her neck when she bucks her hips against him, her nails digging into his shoulders.Â
Chan buries his nose into her scent gland before switching their positions so sheâs on the bed and heâs hovering above. One arm next to her head to keep himself up and the other lightly trailing up her bare thigh to the bottom of her skirt.Â
âAre you sure about this, baby girl? Because once we start, Iâm not stopping.â He looks into Y/nâs eyes, seeing how desperate and needy she already is as she nods her head. âWords baby, I need you to use your words.â
âYes alpha, Iâm sure.â
âGood girl.â He growls as he pushes her skirt up and cups her sex, feeling how damp her underwear is. âFuck, my little omega, youâre already so wet.âÂ
Y/n covers her face with her hands in embarrassment as he continues to rub her through her panties letting out little whines and moans.Â
âDonât hide from me.â Chan grabs both of her wrists with one hand and moves them from her face and pins them above her head. âThere she is, my beautiful girl.â
âChannie.â Y/n bucks her hips against his hand. âYouâre teasing.â
âAm I?â He fake pouts at her before taking his hand away from her and she whines and squirms as he still holds her in place. âWhatâs wrong? I thought you didnât want me to tease you? So I stopped.âÂ
âChan, please.â And with a smirk at her begging he lets go of her wrists, moving his hands to her blouse and takes it off and raises a brow at her bare chest. âNo bra? Tsk, naughty girl.â
âTook it off when we got home.â Y/n pants. âIt was uncomfortable.âÂ
âOf course it was.â He coos, kissing her lips again and cups her boob, squeezing it a little before playing with her nipple.Â
She arches her back, moaning into his mouth as she starts pulling at his shirt trying to get it off. Chan sits back pulling the shirt over his head and she ogles him, eyes roaming over every muscle of his torso. She then notices the bulge in his jeans, sitting up she unbuttons them as he smiles while watching her, helping take his pants off leaving him in his boxers.Â
Chan grabs the waistband of her skirt, pulling it down along with her panties before pushing her to lay back down as he looks over her.
âYouâre so beautiful.â He whispers, moving his fingers to play with her slit before pushing a finger in causing her to bite her lip. âYouâre so tight, baby. If you canât take my finger, how are you gonna take my cock?â
âI can take it.â The omega moans as he starts to finger her. âPlease alpha, I can, I promise.â
âLet me prep you first.â
He pushes a second finger in and makes a come hither motion and she arches her back once again grabbing onto his arm as he speeds up his fingers.Â
âChannie, please.â Y/n whimpers as he pulls his fingers out of her pussy, bringing his fingers to his mouth to taste her slick.
âMmm, you tastes so good. Gonna have to eat you out sometime.â He wastes no time sliding his boxers off before leaning over her, lining up with her. âThis might hurt a little, but I promise it will get better, just let me know if it gets to be too much.â
âOkay.â Y/m whispers and gasps when he starts to push in.Â
When Chan feels some resistance he gives a hard thrust, completely bottoming out inside her causing her to moan a little in pain and pleasure. He stays still, looking at her face to check sheâs okay and wipes away a tear from her eye.
âDoes it hurt?â
âA little.â The omega whimpers before grinding against him. âPlease move.â
Chan pulls out a bit before thrusting back in causing her to gasp again as he moves. Her expression soon changed from that of a bit of pain into pleasure.
âYouâre so tight, baby girl.â He grunts as her hands go to his shoulders, claws coming out and start digging into his skins as she becomes a moaning mess under him.
âPlease alpha, more.â And he speeds up his rhythm, rutting into her as he looks down to where they are connected seeing just how well sheâs taking him.Â
When he sees some blood, which shockingly didnât make her feel bad for hurting her but turned him on more knowing heâs taken her innocence and now belongs to the pack, to him. The sight of it causes him to harden his thrust and he grabs her hands from his shoulders placing them next to her head and holds them.
âChannie⌠ah.â Y/n squeezes his hands, head turning to the side as her eyes close, her walls clamping around him.
âFuck.â He growls, loving the sound her slick makes around his cock. âYou close baby?â
She nods in desperation and the knot at the base of his cock starts to swell. âPlease, Chan, so close. Want your knot, please. Please claim me.â
Chan nuzzles into her neck for a moment smelling at her scent gland before biting down hard, teeth breaking the skin as he tastes her blood. She screams and cums around him, shaking in pleasure, her juices squirting everywhere making a mess of both of them and the bed. She thought the bite would hurt but instead she just feels a flood of his love and emotions for her.
He stays latched onto her neck riding out her pleasure before his knot inflates all the way and he releases his load into her. His knot keeps him locked in as his cum fills her up, some spilling out around his cock. It isnât until sheâs milked him dry that he lets go of her neck, licking his lips of her blood.
Y/n gazes up at him looking fucked out as he lets go of one of her hands to push some of her hair out of her face. âYou did so good, baby girl.â
âWanna bite you too.â The omega whimpers as she tries to move but his knot still hasnât softened, keeping him in place.
Chan leans down, giving her access to his neck, the side with only three mate marks and she bites down just under the bottom one. He groans in pleasure and lets her stay there as long as she wants.Â
Once she lets go she looks up at him, eyes full of love. âMy alpha.â
âThatâs right baby.â He coos and kisses her lips. âI love you so much.â
âLove you too.â
______________________________________________________________
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omg omg mera just imagine step bro skully with a step sister who is utterly insatiable when it comes to sex and far from shy about it. ever since you and skully confirmed your mutual affection for one another, youâve taken any chance you can get to milk him dry and feel his fat cock inside your needy pussy. unable to go even a day without feeling the heavy weight of him snug in your wet walls.
sneaking into his room in the morning and at night, riding him senseless as he tries to hide his pathetic whines n whimpers from how heavenly your pussy feels. inconspicuously sucking skully off when the two of you are supposed to be doing something else, and him desperately trying not to finish so quickly because youâre just so good with your mouth. but heâs never allowed to cum down your throat; you always pull away right before he reaches his climax and give him a cheeky smile as you playfully coo that heâs only allowed to let out allll his cum in your pussy. sneaking in some desperate horny quickies when your parents arenât looking or when the two of you are out in public throughout the day. and rather than try to clean out his seed, you keep it all in there, walking around with your adorably pathetic step broâs cum stuffed deep inside your pussy.
of course, skully canât say no to you, far too infatuated with his dear step sis and addicted to your pussy to even think of denying both of you pleasure. and heâs practically melting with how often you encourage him to fuck you raw, the risky thrill of getting you pregnant making his head spin. if you keep teasing him and practically begging for him to breed you every time he stuffs your pussy with his cum, he might really do it.
AAAA YES!!!! OTL they match each other's freak so well...... the most horny, insatiable romance and sex you've ever seen!!! Being so clingy with each other,, maybe even holding hands in public or feeling so pleased when you're mistaken for a couple when you're out on dates (cafĂŠ dates, bookstore dates, even a stroll through the town). Those kind strangers who complimented you are completely unaware of the fact that that's your stepbrother and just minutes ago he had you pressed against the bathroom stall wall. :3
Or when your classmates at school try to ask you out on dates and you always tell them your heart belongs to someone else. Some of them are irritated. Surely the guy you're dating now can't be all that great. What's so good about him that you always seem to swoon and giggle dreamily whenever you talk about him? And the answer to that is everything; you love everything about your boyfriend (stepbrother). <3 omg omg what if,,, school dance and you and Skully slip out halfway through to have your own little party..... waltzing under the moonlight, getting ice cream late at night, and of course tearing each other out of your formal clothes in a feverish hurry to kiss and fuck and feel good,,, hardly able to get everything off, so you're just fucking partially clothed. >:D always going at it like rabbits.....
Oooo and then there's the day when he's finally successful in knocking you up. Waking up with horrible morning sickness and, though he feels bad and wants to help you feel better, he can't stop himself from getting excited. Is this what he thinks it is???? :O somehow your libido is even more insatiable when you're pregnant..... and you're so impatient,,, pushing him down on your bed and getting all huffy and pouty because you missed him (he was only gone for thirty minutes) and want to feel him inside you,,, doesn't he want to be close to you and the baby!! >_< riding him and all he can do is admire you from where he's lying on his back, so utterly whipped for you and your pretty pregnant belly, gently rubbing your hips or placing his palms on your bump. No one can know it was him who knocked you up even though you both desperately wish you didn't have to keep your love so secret. :( it's just,,, in a town as small as this one, in which people have such close-minded views, no one would ever understand or accept your love.
But one day you won't have to keep it hidden hehe. And sometimes he gets jealous when people openly ogle at you or try to hit on you, so sometimes he leaves hickeys and marks in places that are hard to cover up out of envious frustration. He just can't help it!!! But you love your stepbrother, and every part of him, even the most messiest ones, are wonderful in their own ways.
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Nine Lives (witch's familiar!Ezra x witch!f!reader) - Part 3
Moth's Masterlist // follow @mothandpidgeon-updates and turn on notifications to stay updated with my fics!
SERIES MASTERLIST
pairing: witch's familiar!Ezra x witch!f!reader
rating: T (evenual E) MDNI
summary: As you came into your powers and your curves filled in, Ezra realized he feelings for you were more than just affection. The only problem? He's a 300 year old crused witch. Oh, and he's a cat.
contents: age gap (like 300 years), angst, slow burn, yearning, probably anachronistic witchy stuff, Ezra is a cat, he won't be forever, this isnt a beastiality thing, mentions of abuse moth never uses y/n.
wc: 4.3k
a/n: I've had a tough couple of weeks (I mean, this week, who hasn't). I hope this will bring some of you joy this weekend. You deserve it. If it did, please please let me know. That would really cheer me up. Also, in case you missed it, going forward I'm going to be updating every 2 weeks. I really hope I can keep it up!
I must thanks @moonlitbirdie and @lowlights for the beta and their massive support of me in life and in writing this. Also thank you @schnarfer for helping me brainstorm some plot!
đââŹ
Aunt Margotâs ringing up a tattooed girl with glasses when you stomp into the shop. You swing the door open so violently that itâs bell thwacks into the wall. You had almost a mile in the woods to walk it off but your anger has only grown, ballooning into a hot rage thatâs devouring everything in your path.
âHow was it?â Margot asks with a sly smile once the customerâs left with their little brown paper bag.
âRiverâs disgusting,â you announce.Â
âWhat happened?â her expression immediately clouds with concern.Â
âThis is exactly why I donât date witches. I told you that I didn't want to be set up with him.â you rant, blowing past her into what was once the dining room.Â
Thereâs still a turned leg table at its center, now piled with goods for sale. Percy winds his way between beeswax candles and hand-poured soaps. Â
âOh yes I really forced him on you,â she says with sarcasm. âI recall the two of you were practically necking in front of the whole coven last night.â
Youâre not sure if itâs the idea that you almost fucked River or the term necking that grosses you out more but you cringe.
âHeâs so backwards. Guys like him make me ashamed to be a witch,â you say.Â
âHow can you say such a thing? Ashamed to be a witch! Do I need to remind you just how lucky you are? After what weâve been through? Our kind was almost wiped off the face of the earth. By mortals like your little boyfriends,â she says.Â
âIâm so tired of hearing that. Itâs a shitty excuse. Mortals killed witches hundreds of years ago so we get a free pass to do whatever we want. To treat our familiars like slaves,â you reply.Â
She scoffs. âPercy do you hear that?â
He squeaks indignantly.Â
âHeâs offended by that,â she tells you.Â
âHe should be. Itâs worse than offensive. Itâs evil!â you say. Your voice echoes so loudly it rattles the antique silvered mirror hanging over the mantle.Â
Margot gathers Percy in her palm calmly stroking his white fur, her eyebrow arched in a way that tells you sheâs trying to be patient. You shouldnât take out it on her. Sheâs never been anything but good to her familiar.Â
âDo you know what he said about Ezra?â You can feel tears begin to bite at your eyes.Â
She frowns when she reaches into your mind to hear it herself.Â
âHis familyâs always held onto the old ways," she says, shaking her head in disappointment.Â
âDonât make excuses for him,â you snap.Â
She tucks Percy into the pocket of her cardigan and places a gentle hand on your shoulder.Â
âHeâs an idiot and Iâm proud of you. And you should be proud of yourself too. All of you,â she says.Â
â
The basement of the Arcane Page might be described as spooky, what with its cobwebs and dusty, amber jars. Apothecary shelves stocked with potions, rare ingredients, and animal bones meet the low ceilings. Disused broomsticks sit in the corner along with willow branches and a black goatâs horn. There are all manner of spell books down here along with hand written notes from your ancestors. At the center of the room thereâs a wide oak table carved with runes and spells. It smells like ink and dried leaves and magic.Â
The warm sunset streams through the egress windows catching the dust that floats in the air. Margot didnât have to be a mind reader to know you wanted to be alone and so she didnât put up a fight when you offered to close up on your own. After you closed the register and locked the front door, you ventured down to the part of the shop meant only for witches.Â
Your plan was just to have some quiet before venturing upstairs where Ezra would be waiting. For all you knew he was still huddled under the bed. You could abhor River but only one of you had actually hurt your familiar. You couldnât bring yourself to face Ezra knowing you were just as bad as the rest of them.Â
You start opening old books. Spell books and ancient texts. Youâre looking for something, what it is you canât be certain. All you know is that you felt drawn down here, your fingers itching for the parchment pages.Â
When you were a young witch, you came here often. There were spell books that had become your favorites, embellished with intricate illustrations. You memorized charms for changing the color of your hair and shuffled a dog-eared set of tarot cards. This was where you cast some of your very first spells. Magic made the world feel full of wonder yet it gave you some control, an order to things that would otherwise be chaos.Â
Thatâs gone now. All of it mixed upâ pride and shame, power and weakness, love and loss.Â
You pull a large volume from the shelf, its soft leather cover embossed with constellations. heavy and thick, You need both hands to carry it to the table where it lands with a thud and a gasp of dust escapes into the air.Â
You turn it open, the aged glue of its spine cracking. You run your fingers over the delicate pages, so thin you can practically see through them. Theyâre covered in a careful hand and you canât help but wonder about the witches that set these spells down, what advice theyâd have for you.Â
The magic in here is convoluted, singular spells that spill over pages and pages with diagrams and celestial calendars. Some are written in verse so dense you can barely make out their meaning. They remind you of the cadence of Ezraâs voice.Â
These are not small acts of witchcraft. There are instructions for summoning beasts and recipes for potions that restore youth to be brewed specially on the solstice. Some of it feels dangerousâ curses against unfaithful lovers, spells to wake the dead and use them for your bidding.Â
You read through them all with mild curiosity. You have no reason to reanimate a dead horse or brew a cure for quinsyâ whatever that isâ though it would be amusing to cast a perpetual dancing spell on River if you didnât think it would kill him.Â
You chuckle to yourself as you imagine him dancing uncontrollably, his limbs uncontrollable, as you turn the page. And there you see it.Â
What you didnât know what you were looking for has found you. Â
â
You barge into the apartment with a wild look in your eye. Ezraâs still curled up in your spot on the bed. Heâs been there most of the afternoon, letting bad memories flood his mind.Â
After the elders turned him, Ezra promised himself that he would be better. Heâd been selfish and dishonest. Quick to anger. It was out of necessity, heâd told himself, but obviously it had only brought him suffering. He would change. But had he? Heâd let you care for him, had loved you and fantasized about you, and heâd hurt you. Â
Youâre calling his name, breathless from running up the stairs, with a leather bound book under your arm.Â
Ezra lingers in the bedroom door, guilt still festering.Â
âLook,â you say, setting the tome open on the little breakfast table with a thud. It seems as though youâve forgotten everything, a whirl of urgency about you.Â
Ezra hops up and seats himself in front of the weathered pages. He takes in the verses there, the drawing scratched with quill and ink. Itâs complicated and obscure, laborious instructions that must be followed to the letter. Behind him youâre nearly bouncing with untamed energy.Â
âWhat are you showing me?â he asks. He knows. The spell is exact but its outcome is clear.Â
âItâs a transfiguration spell,â you explain.Â
âThat much is clear butââ
âI want to do it,â you say. Thereâs a determination in your words, a fiery assuredness that makes Ezraâs heart pick up. âI want to turn you back into a human.â
âThatâs impossible.â
âNo. Itâs all right here. And it says under the moon of All Hallowâs Eve. Thatâs just in a few weeks,â you add excitedly.Â
âLittle mage, I neednât explain why this is folly,â he says.
It pains him to say it and not just because being human again would be the greatest gift. Your expression is a mix of frustration and heartbreak.Â
âYou propose to defy the Eldersâ judgment. They wonât take kindly to that,â he says.Â
âFuck them,â you hiss. âThe laws have changed. If you were convicted now, theyâd take your powers but they wouldnât make you live like this.â
âTheyâll take yours if you do something so foolish,â he says. It comes out harsh but heâs angry that youâd risk your powers for him. That he wants so badly to accept.Â
âYou donât deserve to be a fucking cat. You should get a normal life,â you say, your body sagging onto the sofa like it canât stand the weight of it all anymore.Â
âThatâs quite a touching sentiment.â Ezra tries to couch the words in sarcasm but his voice breaks. He jumps down from the table and situates himself on the cushion beside you.Â
âWhy didnât you tell them?â you ask, defeated. Tearful eyes look towards the ceiling before falling onto him. âWhen they put you on trial. Why didnât you tell the elders what heâd done?â
Ezraâs head sinks between his shoulders.Â
Damon was the kind of witch that only used his powers to numb himself to the rest of the world. He brewed potions that made him neglectful of his daughter one moment, belligerent towards her the next. Ezra had never considered himself a do-gooder. He saw the girl with bruises and said nothing. He was so disinterested in the goings on, heâd never even bothered to learn her name until his trial. Largely, he ignored them until the night he took Damonâs life.Â
Ezra hadnât meant to engage him. It was a snide remark he made that pulled Damonâs attention away from berating Cee. Soon the two of them came to blows, Damon throwing the first punch with an accusation. Ezra was scrappy but there was a point when Damon had him pinned down and he thought his time was up. So when he was able to break free, Ezra made sure he wouldnât be bested.Â
âYou canât understand how precarious it was for us then,â he says. âA hundred years of witch hunts. The life of a witch, even one as detestable as Damon was precious.â
Maybe if theyâd known how Damon treated one of their kind, they would have shown Ezra leniency. But the real reason he accepted his punishment was because he knew it had been his own fault. Had he intervened earlier, gotten the Elders involved, it wouldnât have ended in murder. You might think him a hero, but when the Elders made Ezra her familiar, Cee made it clear that she did not.Â
You sigh, a slight shake of your head, and you sink back into the sofa.Â
âYou are a more than capable witch but this is ancient magic. It took the powers of no less than three elders to change me,â Ezra says as if itâs any consolation.Â
âMaybe MargotââÂ
âYouâd both risk your powers,â he stops you. âNo, little mage. Itâs impossible.â
â
âIâm not coming,â you say.Â
Aunt Margot is loading a carpet bag into the trunk of her station wagon. Nearly a month has passed since the equinox. Halloween is two days away which means itâs time for your annual trip to Salem where the coven will be gathered through Samhain. The celebrations will be days long, singing and food, apple bobbing and fortune telling. Your little gathering doesn't compare.Â
Last night you couldnât bring yourself to pack.
âWhat do you mean?â She asks.
âIâm sorry,â you say with a shrug.Â
Youâve been waffling on this decision for weeks but youâve made up your mind. Even if it disappoints Aunt Margot.
âBut everyone will miss you. And Simoneâs making her gumbo,â she says.
âI know,â you say.Â
As Margot babbles out more reasons why you really shouldnât stay home (âThe spirit walk just wonât be the same without youâ), Ezra snakes between your legs. You were nervous of how sheâd take this news and Ezra promised to be moral support.Â
She throws out her hands with a pout. âI canât stand thinking about you alone for All Hallows Eve,â she says.Â
âI wonât be alone,â you say, picking Ezra up and scratching under his chin. Â
âI will miss the gumbo,â he tells her.Â
âNo Ezra,â she contemplates. âMaybe I can actually win at Scrabble.âÂ
âPerchance,â he says, and you know sheâs mentally tabulating the word score.Â
âIs this because of River?â She narrows her eyes.Â
Itâs not. While you certainly wonât miss him, you wouldnât let some dickwad keep you from having a good time. Itâs all of them, really. Esme and the rest of them. Knowing how they think of Ezra, how they think of you, it makes you want to scream. You canât subject him to their scorn and disdain, you wonât. Youâd rather spend All Hallows Eve at home.Â
And then thereâs that little part of you. The one that knows itâs preposterous and downright idiotic yet still hopes that you can put the Halloween moon to good use. Ezra shut that down fast but, oh, how good would it feel for the funny little witch to give them all the middle finger? .Â
âIâm just not in the spirit,â you say.Â
âWell it wonât feel like All Hallows Eve without you,â she sighs.Â
âI know,â you say. Thereâs a lump in your throat. Youâve never been apart from her for Samhain. There are countless warm memories of Halloweens past. When Margot got you your very first cauldron. The taste of pumpkin pie. The year of the freak snowstorm.Â
With another sigh and the jingle of her bracelets, Margot pulls you into an embrace. The smell of vetiver hangs off her hair and you breathe it in deeply.Â
âIâll light a candle for you,â she promises.Â
âThanks,â you say.Â
âAnd Iâm going to jinx Riverâs socks. Theyâll be damp for a month,â she says.Â
You laugh.Â
The horn of her car beeps and you break the hug to see Percy appear at the top of the steering wheel.Â
âHeâs worried about the traffic on the Thruway,â she tells you. âIâm coming!â
âTake care of her,â she says to Ezra, petting along his jaw
He nods.Â
When Margotâs tail lights disappear down the street, you sit beside Ezra on the front steps.Â
âYou could go,â he says.Â
âI made the right choice,â you say, stroking down the shiny fur on his back.Â
âSo what now?â he asks.Â
âI donât know. I've always wanted to go trick or treating,â you say.Â
âThatâs blasphemy, little mage,â Ezra quips.Â
âÂ
Ezra holds you in his arms. Human arms. Your skin is warm against his as you lay tangled together. The morning light catches on the prism beads you have hanging in your bedroom window, little rainbows dancing across the walls and rumpled bedspread. His lips brush across your forehead, leaving a ghost of a kiss at your hairline. You sigh dreamily and your fingertips graze his bare chest. Youâre just barely awake when you turn your face up to him, your eyes warm like you missed him while you were sleeping. He greets you with a kiss, your lips opening to him with a low hum. His fingers tangle with yours as the grasp the spindles in the headboard.Â
His name comes out of you in a gasp of breath.Â
Heâs had these dreams for years but theyâve been happening almost every night since you showed him that spell. Sometimes passionateâ your thighs opening as he explores your bodyâ but just as often innocuous. Picking flowers in the meadow by his boyhood home. Bringing you tea as you read on the porch swing.Â
Each dream is so alluring, even the most banal, he wakes up with the words on the tip of his tongue, ready to ask you to risk it all and turn him.Â
You havenât brought it up again in the weeks since you set that spellbook in front of him. Maybe you thought better of it. Maybe you were just angry. You told him about your spat with River and, while it touched him that youâd come to his defense, he knew it was an impulsive choice.Â
Either way, itâs for the best.
It wouldnât end well. Of course, youâd be putting yourself at risk. Heâd made that very clear to you. There are a thousand other reasons why it shouldnât be done. Heâs probably forgotten how to be human and what he would do with himself in this day and age, he has no idea. The only job experience heâs had in the past two hundred years is rat catching.
The logistics of being a human matter little to him, though. His real concern is with you.
Heâll no longer be your companion. You wonât scratch behind his ears, invite him to lay in your lap. Youâll probably expect him to move on and live the life heâs always wanted. He canât think of one that doesnât involve you.
At least as a cat, he never has to know if youâd choose another man over him.
Heâs laying awake, pondering this once again, when your eyes crack open. Warm mid morning light pours in through the lace curtains, bathing you in a honeyed glow. With Margot out of town and the store closed, the two of you had been on your own, spending the previous dsy together. A walk in the woods, a visit to the coffee shop where other patrons greeted Ezra with friendly scritches. You bailed on plans with the mortal Connor to watch movies and snuggle Ezra on the couch. It should have been enough, thatâs what he thought when the credits rolled and you were snoring on the couch, your fingers buried in his scruff. He could share a lifetime of this with you and be grateful for it. But he was greedy.Â
âHappy Halloween,â you say.Â
You pull him close and he nuzzles into your warm skin.Â
âYou were in my dream,â you say. Your voice is still rough from sleep, still somewhere far away like you havenât fully regained consciousness.Â
Ezraâs cheeks heat under his fur. Itâs not just the raspiness of your throat but his shame. If only you knew what heâd been dreaming about.Â
âI was doing that spell. To change you,â you say.Â
âI wouldâve hoped for something more scintillating.â He plays it off as a joke.Â
You huff a laugh and rest your wrist across your forehead, eyes cast towards the ceiling. âRight when you turned I woke up,â you say.Â
Ezra doesnât want to admit itâ that he was thinking about that very spell, that he wants your dream to be a premonition. Witches have been known to have those. No, thatâs wishful thinking.Â
He gets to his feet and stretches out.Â
âWhat a pity you missed my face. I canât quite remember my own countenance,â he says.Â
You sigh with exasperation. âI think itâs a sign,â you say.
âOur dreams are just that,â he tells you.
âNot this one. It wasnât just a dream,â you insist. You sit up on your elbows meeting his eye with eagerness. âI can do it.â
âI told youââ
âEzra, I want to do it,â you say with finality. âI want you to be human again.â
He grits his teeth. If he was capable of crying, he might after hearing your words, seeing that resolution in your expression. It takes all of his strength to not just give in and say yes. You know the reasons why it shouldnât be done and he canât tell you the ones that make him hesitant.
âYou would turn me knowing how much more capable I am of violence? I might be declawed but I will be far more dangerous as man than beast.,â he asks. It still weighs on him even though itâs been weeks since the equinox and it seems youâve all but forgotten it.
âI trust you,â you say. Thereâs a tenderness in your eyes that makes Ezraâs heart swell.Â
He knows you mean it. You shouldnât. He doesnât deserve to be trusted, to be loved by you. He was never a good man, never stood up for anyone else. And itâs that very reason thatâs had his mind in knots. Heâs selfish. He wants this chance.Â
Maybe, maybe youâll give him the same look as a human and he can love you back the way heâs always wanted.Â
âBesides, I know how to defend myself,â you say with a grin.Â
Thatâs his little mage.Â
âVery well,â he says. âIâm ready.â
â
You light the final candles on the oak table. The basement is illuminated by the dim glow of candles. Youâve spent the whole day down here with Ezra readying everything for the moon of All Hallows Eve.
Luckily Aunt Margot will be gone for the week so you donât have to worry about interruptions. Youâre not sure how sheâll react but right now, frankly, you donât care. This is the right thing to do, you keep telling yourself. Itâs justice. Itâs not about the thrill you feel now, butterflies in your belly.Â
Youâve daydreamed about it and after last nightâs dream, your imagination feels closer than ever Thereâs no good picture in your mind of what Ezra will be like but his looks arenât important. You canât wait to do normal things with him. What will it be like to get a coffee with Ezra? To do rituals together at Ostara. To hear his old stories again, made new by his facial expressions.Â
Heâs quiet, nervous youâre sure, beside your cauldron. His golden eyes flit from the flames to the spellbook to the darkened window. Your excitement cools and suddenly youâre worried that your enthusiasm got the better of you. Had you pressured him into agreeing to this? Heâs still your familiar after all, bound to serve you.
You kneel at the edge of the table.
âAre you sure you want to do this? We donât have to,â you say.
âAs long as youâre certain youâre willing to take on the risks,â he tells you.
You nod.
âVery well,â he says.
You look at one another for a long time, both knowing that this will be the last time things are the same. You memorize everything about him, his elegant face, the whiskers beside his little black nose, the streak of white fur above his eye. This is your Ezra, will always be even if he doesnât exist in this form. You wish you could thank him for everything heâs done for you but the words are stuck in your throat. It wonât do to start crying now when you need to focus and recite the incantation clearly.
âI love you, Ezra,â you manage.
He responds with a long, slow blink and you kiss his forehead.
The potion is murky and thick as you ladle it into a dish. Ezra recoils when you place it in front of him.Â
âSmells like piss,â he says with a wince before lapping it up. A shiver runs over his body, down the length of his tail. âTastes like it.â
He leaps onto the table and settles at the center of the carved pentagram.
âWork your magic, little mage,â he says.
This is it. Itâs all laid out just like your dream but youâre still anxious. Thereâs no room for error.
With a deep breath, you straighten your back and begin to say the words. You read them countless times throughout the day, memorizing each verse so that it can flow from your heart to your tongue. As each one leaves your mouth, you visualize them on the page. Magic begins to stir in you, a tingle beneath your skin.
Ezra lays on his belly, his eyes drifting close, paws outstretched towards you.Â
You shut your eyes tight and focus your energy, like a beam of pure magic directed towards him and say the words again.You think about him, really envision his details down to the hair. Memories flood you. Ezra rubbing up on the old books in the store. His soft purrs against your chest when your heart felt heavy. The time he slipped on the edge of the tub and fell into your bath. The love you feel for him radiates in your chest all the way to your fingertips.
Youâre squeezing all of it palms, every drop of energy within you aimed at Ezra. A vibration, an earthquake.Â
You say the words a final time.Â
Lightheaded. Breathless. Exhausted.Â
Your eyes flutter open.
Ezra lays on the table just as you left him. Unchanged.
âNo.â The word slips from your mouth nothing more than a whisper.
Ezra blinks, looking down at his black paws.
You see his shoulders sag and a long moment passes as he gathers himself before looking at you.
It doesnât make sense. You did everything right, just as youâd seen in your sleep. Youâve never cast with such fervor.Â
âOkay,â you say, swallowing hard around a sob. âWeâll do it again. The moon will be higher.â You can hear your own desperation, voice shaking as you try not to lose faith.
Ezra slowly sits himself up.
âMaybe you need more potion,â you suggest.
âNo, little mage,â he says, resigned.Â
âEzââ Youâve failed him. Your chest burns, tears brim in your eyes.It feels like you might collapse from the exertion and sheer heartbreak thatâs overwhelming you.
âItâs alright. Iâve been a cat for more than a few years. And so I shall remain,â he says.
đââŹ
Part 4
Again, it would really make my day to hear from you if you've come this far! My asks and dms are always open!
#ezra#ezra prospect#witchy#ezra prospect x f!reader#ezra x f!reader#pedro pascal fic#pedro pascal#prospect fic
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Your eyes flick over him, taking in his nervous fidgeting. Itâs endearing, really, the way he seems like he'd rather be anywhere but standing across from you. And maybe itâs because he's the polar opposite of the loud types, but you canât help teasing him a little.
Endearing is just the perfect description for Bob đĽ°
You canât resist needling him just a bit more, leaning in just close enough to watch him fluster. You know the effect you haveâthe low neckline of your top, the tattoos trailing down your arm, the glint of your piercings just visible through the thin fabric. Heâs doing his best not to stare, but his eyes flick down for a split second before he yanks his gaze back up, his face turning redder by the second.
đ¤đ¤đ¤
He leans in even closer, his voice dropping to a low, conspiratorial tone. âWell, letâs start with two beers for Phoenix and Bob. Canât have âem dehydrating, right?â Thereâs a slight pause, and he gives you a smirk, his gaze lingering a bit longer than necessary. âMake sure Bobâs is extra coldâheâs, uh, still cooling off after the last time you talked to him.â You laugh, shaking your head as you start on the beers. âDonât tell me heâs still flustered from that., it's been years.â âPoor guy doesnât stand a chance with you around, no matter the time,â Hangman says with a wink.
Oh Bobby đĽš
He pauses, rolling his eyes in that way he does whenever he brings up Rooster. âRoosterâs a beer guy, as usual. But letâs give him the lighter stuff. Donât want him trying to prove anything tonight.â
Hahah this cracked me up đ
âAnd what about you, Hangman?â you ask, tossing him a smirk. âAnything special, or do you just want a mirror to stare into?â
Perfect answer đđť
You laugh, reaching for a row of glasses. âLet me see⌠Something tells me you could handle a little extra kick tonight.â You pour a round of tequila for Phoenix and Coyote, grabbing lime wedges and a sprinkle of salt for the rims.
The way I just know Phoenix and Coyote are gonna drink those tequila shots with the most sexual tension between them đ¤
He chuckles, not missing a beat. âBecause I donât think youâd waste your time with just any guy.â He holds your gaze, letting the words hang in the air, something challenging in his smile. âYou seem a little⌠particular.â
I love how they have this verbal sparring going on
Phoenix snickers, sipping her tequila and watching the scene unfold like itâs her favourite soap opera. âThis is priceless,â she mutters to Coyote, who nods, clearly entertained.
Oh they are having the best time, front row and all đ
âHey, Bob,â she says with a mischievous grin, âyouâre awfully quiet over there. What do you think? Whoâs got the better shot?â Bobâs eyes widen as every head at the table turns to look at him. He stammers, his grip tightening on his glass. âIâI donât know,â he mumbles, his voice barely audible. âI, uh⌠I think sheâd go for someone⌠respectful. Kind of⌠uhâŚâ
He's like: oh please don't rope me into this đŤŁ
Bob just blushes harder, sinking a little lower in his seat as Phoenix pats his back in a show of support. âIgnore them, Bob. Theyâre just scared youâre the dark horse here,â she teases, sending Jake and Bradley a challenging look.
Oh I have a feeling Phoenix knows something the others don't đ¤đ¤
Bob practically melts into his seat, but despite his obvious embarrassment, thereâs the smallest hint of a smile tugging at the corner of his mouth as he glances at you.
đđđ
Bobâs leaning on the railing, doing his best to stay out of the spotlight as Jake and Bradley bicker, each too wrapped up in their little rivalry to notice you coming. Only Phoenix catches your approach, her eyes widening in excitement as she realizes whatâs about to happen. Sheâs the only one who knows, after all.
Hehe I knew it đ maybe Jake and Bradley should just kiss each other, they already bicker like an old married couple đ¤
You can tell heâs trying to play it cool, but thereâs a flicker of pure adoration in his eyes as he takes you in. Without a word, he leans in, brushing his lips softly against yours, his hand finding your waist as he pulls you in. His usual shyness fades as he melts into the kiss, his touch growing just a little bolder, like heâs letting himself savour every second.
đĽ°đĽ°đĽ°
Around you, the entire squad has gone silent. Rooster, Hangman, and Coyote are all staring, mouths slightly open in complete disbelief. But itâs not the kiss that has them in shock. Itâs the glint of your engagement ringâhanging on a delicate chain around your neck, tucked just under the collar of your shirt. The light catches it as you pull back from Bob, and you see the realization dawn on each of their faces.
They are like:
đ¤Żđ¤Żđ¤Ż
Bob, still flushed from the kiss, shifts awkwardly as he catches sight of his teammatesâ stunned expressions. He ducks his head, clearly overwhelmed by all the attention, but thereâs a shy smile tugging at the corner of his mouth as he wraps an arm around your waist, holding you close.
He is just so cute đĽ°
âGuess we kept it under wraps a little too well,â you say with a smirk, running a hand affectionately through Bobâs hair, watching as he blushes even deeper but relaxes into your touch. He looks at you with such genuine, quiet adoration that itâs impossible not to smile.
Urgh they are perfect together and Bob's blushing is just so cute đĽ°
Rooster, still processing, lets out a low whistle, shaking his head. âWow. And here I was thinking shy guys didnât stand a chance.â Phoenix is practically beside herself with joy, and she canât help but gloat just a little. âWell, guess what, boys?â You grin, crossing your arms. âTurns out all I wanted was the quiet one.â
Haha this is just perfect!! And Phoenix is reeling of joy, I know it đ
The quiet ones
Summary: You surprise the Dagger Squad by revealing your secret to Bob, who shyly but lovingly melts into your kiss as the others watch in shock, as shy guys are your type.
Chapter Warning: Secret relationship reveal, unexpected PDA, and flustered teammates, drinking.
Pairing: Robert "Bob" Floyd x reader
The sun is barely up, casting a soft glow over the empty beach outside The Hard Deck as you pull open the doors and step into the familiar dimness of the bar.
You've been doing this for yearsâunlocking before the heat of the day sets in, setting up stools, and sliding glasses onto the shelves with the smooth rhythm you've perfected. Today feels the same, but something in the air hints it won't be an ordinary shift. There's a buzz, the sort that comes with Navy missions brewing, whispered over drinks in tones low enough that only bartenders know how to hear.
You're wiping down the bar when the door creaks open. You look up and spot a guy with dark-rimmed glasses, a touch of shyness evident in the way he stands at the door, scanning the place like heâs about to get reprimanded just for being here early. He's tall but sort of unassuming, a guy who'd rather fade into the background. He's a contrast to the pilots who usually come in loud, all bravado and swagger. You recognize him instantly: Bob, the quiet one who stands at the edges of the Dagger Squad.
As he approaches, you give him a slow, easy smile and cross your arms, leaning back. "Hey there. Early start for you guys?"
He swallows hard, adjusting his glasses. âUhâŚyeah. JustâŚgetting a round for the squad.â His voice is barely audible, like heâs half-hoping youâll mishear and let him walk away without much fuss.
Your eyes flick over him, taking in his nervous fidgeting. Itâs endearing, really, the way he seems like he'd rather be anywhere but standing across from you. And maybe itâs because he's the polar opposite of the loud types, but you canât help teasing him a little.
âSoâŚwhoâs in charge of this little mission?â you ask, setting down a few glasses with a subtle clink.
He hesitates, caught off guard by the question. âUhâŚAdmiral Simpson.â
You chuckle. âBeau? That's my uncle."
Bob's eyes widen, his mouth hanging open for a moment before he stammers out a response. "Oh. Uh, wow. I⌠I didnât know." The faintest blush creeps up his cheeks, and he looks down, almost embarrassed to be caught off guard like that.
You canât resist needling him just a bit more, leaning in just close enough to watch him fluster. You know the effect you haveâthe low neckline of your top, the tattoos trailing down your arm, the glint of your piercings just visible through the thin fabric. Heâs doing his best not to stare, but his eyes flick down for a split second before he yanks his gaze back up, his face turning redder by the second.
âDonât worry,â you say with a smirk, letting your fingers trace the rim of a glass, âyour secretâs safe with me.â
âUhâŚthanks. I justâum, Iâll takeâŚuh, the round,â he manages, his voice catching as you pour the drinks.
You can see his struggleâthe way he wants to say something, but every time he opens his mouth, he clams up. He's never met anyone like you before, thatâs obvious. The confidence, the tattoos, the piercings peeking through the fabricâit all ties together into something that leaves him completely off balance. And heâs⌠well, adorable.
As you slide the last glass across the bar to him, you give him a wink. âSee you around, Bob. Bring your friends by sometime.â
He mutters a quiet âthank youâ and shuffles out, beers in hand and cheeks flushed. And as he heads out the door, you can't help but grin to yourself, wondering if heâll find the nerve to say more next time.
---
Itâs a typical night at The Hard Deck, the bar buzzing with energy, filled with the sounds of laughter, clinking glasses, and rock music blaring from the jukebox. The place is packed with Navy types, just as it always is when thereâs no active mission holding them back. Youâre behind the bar, quick on your feet, sliding drinks to customers and catching up with the regulars. Then, through the crowd, you spot him.
Hangman strides up to the bar with that cocky swagger heâs famous for. Tall, blond, and all confidence, heâs got a grin that could charm the devil himself. And he knows it. Tonight, heâs dressed in his usual off-duty lookâjust tight enough T-shirt and a leather jacket slung over his shoulder, looking every bit the guy who doesnât take ânoâ for an answer. But thatâs the game he plays, and tonight youâre ready for him.
âEvening, sweetheart,â he drawls, leaning across the bar just a little too close. âThought youâd be closed by now.â
You raise an eyebrow, resting your hands on the bar and meeting his gaze without flinching. âWell, I thought youâd be up in the air by now,â you shoot back, your tone teasing. âGuess weâre both full of surprises.â
He chuckles, clearly delighted by the challenge. âAll right, you got me there,â he says, glancing around. âBut Iâve got a list for you. The squadâs thirsty tonight.â
âLetâs hear it, then,â you say, pulling out a row of glasses, ready to work but giving him your full attention.
He leans in even closer, his voice dropping to a low, conspiratorial tone. âWell, letâs start with two beers for Phoenix and Bob. Canât have âem dehydrating, right?â Thereâs a slight pause, and he gives you a smirk, his gaze lingering a bit longer than necessary. âMake sure Bobâs is extra coldâheâs, uh, still cooling off after the last time you talked to him.â
You laugh, shaking your head as you start on the beers. âDonât tell me heâs still flustered from that., it's been years.â
âPoor guy doesnât stand a chance with you around, no matter the time,â Hangman says with a wink. âBut hey, heâll survive. Next up, Coyote wants a whiskeyâneat. You know how he is. And RoosterâŚâ He pauses, rolling his eyes in that way he does whenever he brings up Rooster. âRoosterâs a beer guy, as usual. But letâs give him the lighter stuff. Donât want him trying to prove anything tonight.â
You slide the beers across to him, already pouring the whiskey as he keeps going. âAnd what about you, Hangman?â you ask, tossing him a smirk. âAnything special, or do you just want a mirror to stare into?â
He laughs, clearly enjoying this back-and-forth. âOuch, darlinâ. That one stings.â He places a hand over his heart, feigning offense before letting his gaze flick down to the line of tattoos trailing up your arm, then back to meet your eyes with a mischievous glint. âBut as long as youâre the one serving, Iâll take whatever you recommend.â
You pour him a whiskey, sliding it over the bar with a raised brow. âThink you can handle it?â
He picks up the glass, holding it up to you with that easy, confident grin. âOh, I can handle a lot more than that. But I like a bartender who can keep me on my toes.â He takes a sip, never breaking eye contact, letting the moment hang in the air.
The bar is still loud around you, but thereâs a beat where itâs just you and him, his gaze heavy and flirtatious, yours daring him to keep going. He leans in a little closer, his voice a quiet murmur. âYou know, we should get a drink somewhere else sometime. Just you and me.â
You lean back, letting a slow smile spread across your face, but truly this guy is not for you. âOh, is that an invitation?â
âConsider it an open one,â he replies, giving you a wink before stepping back to gather up the drinks. âBut hey, donât take too long thinking it over. I donât like waiting.â
Itâs been a busy night, the bar still packed as the crowd buzzes with the kind of energy that only comes when thereâs no telling when the next mission will roll around. Youâre behind the bar, catching your breath after that last round, when you catch sight of Rooster winding his way through the crowd, headed straight for you.
Heâs wearing his usual laid-back styleâwell-worn jeans, a vintage band T-shirt, and that aviator jacket slung over his shoulders. He looks like something out of a different time, especially with those sunglasses perched up in his curls, even though itâs night. Rooster always has this quiet, steady confidence, like he knows he doesnât need to announce himself. And thereâs something a little different in his step as he approaches you, maybe a touch of playfulness in the way heâs looking at you, a half-smile already curving on his lips.
âHey, bartender,â he says, leaning onto the bar with an easy grin. âIâm back for the squadâs refills, but this time I think weâre changing things up.â
âOh yeah?â You give him an amused look, resting your hands on the bar and leaning in just enough to close the space between you. âGuessing Hangman finally realized he can order something other than whiskey?â
He chuckles, shaking his head. âWell, Hangmanâs hard to change. But the rest of us? Weâre open to suggestions. Figured you might know what we need better than we do.â
You raise a brow, sensing the tease in his tone. âOh, so now Iâm in charge of drinks? Guess I must be moving up in the world.â
âBetter believe it.â He flashes you a quick grin. âBut you still gotta keep me entertained while youâre at it.â
You laugh, reaching for a row of glasses. âLet me see⌠Something tells me you could handle a little extra kick tonight.â You pour a round of tequila for Phoenix and Coyote, grabbing lime wedges and a sprinkle of salt for the rims.
âTequila for Phoenix and Coyote,â you announce, lining them up. âAnd⌠letâs do something different for Bob. A Moscow Mule might be more his speedâsomething smooth but not too strong, I know he likes it.â
âPerfect,â Rooster nods, his eyes catching on the way your hands move as you pour, clearly fascinated. âAnd what do you recommend for me?â
âHmm,â you say, pretending to consider as you tilt your head, catching his gaze. âSomething with a bit of bite, I think. Something⌠classic.â
You reach for the whiskey, but instead of neat, you add a twist of orange, pouring a well-balanced Old Fashioned. You slide it over to him, catching his eye with a smirk. âThink youâre ready for that?â
He picks up the glass, turning it slowly in his hand, that same lazy smile lingering on his face. âOnly if youâre ready to join me for one sometime,â he says, his voice low enough to make sure you catch the hint. He takes a sip, and his gaze stays fixed on you, watching your reaction, clearly testing the waters.
You raise an eyebrow, not about to let him off easy. âAnd what makes you think Iâd go for a guy who takes drink recommendations from the bartender?â
He chuckles, not missing a beat. âBecause I donât think youâd waste your time with just any guy.â He holds your gaze, letting the words hang in the air, something challenging in his smile. âYou seem a little⌠particular.â
âAnd you think youâre up to the standards?â You tilt your head, leaning on the bar just close enough that he has to take in every word.
His eyes flick down to your arm, where your tattoos catch the light, and then back up to meet yours, a flicker of mischief in his gaze. âI think Iâd be willing to try,â he says, his voice smooth, steady. âBut Iâll leave it up to you if I get the chance.â
You shake your head, suppressing a grin, and reach for another glass, pouring yourself a splash of soda as you lean back. âHow about you focus on delivering those drinks first, hotshot?â
Rooster raises his glass in a mock salute, his eyes never leaving yours. âAlright, boss,â he says, clearly amused. âBut donât think Iâm letting this go that easily.â
He picks up the tray, balancing it with practiced ease as he throws one last look over his shoulder before heading back to the squad. Youâre left behind the bar, catching your breath with a smile as you watch him go, knowing full well heâll be back for another roundâand maybe another shot at breaking through.
-
The Dagger Squad is clustered around a corner table, the drinks you just served scattered across the tabletop. Conversation and laughter flow easily, but the energy shifts the second Hangman and Rooster start eyeing each other, sizing each other up with cocky grins and sidelong glances. Bob, meanwhile, is trying his best to blend into the background, clutching his Moscow Mule and looking more than a little flustered as he watches his teammates' latest standoff unfold.
âYou know, Rooster,â Jake drawls, leaning back in his chair and raising his whiskey with an infuriatingly smug smile, âyouâre wasting your time here. Sheâs clearly more into a guy with⌠confidence.â He emphasizes the last word, smirking as he takes a slow sip, his eyes flicking over to the bar where youâre serving another customer.
Rooster snorts, crossing his arms as he leans forward. âConfidence? Is that what you call whatever it is you do?â He shakes his head, trying to keep his voice casual, but the competitive gleam in his eyes betrays him. âTrust me, Bagman, sheâs not going for the guy who struts around like a damn peacock.â
Phoenix snickers, sipping her tequila and watching the scene unfold like itâs her favourite soap opera. âThis is priceless,â she mutters to Coyote, who nods, clearly entertained.
âOh, please,â Jake fires back, unfazed. âYou think that âslow burnâ routine of yours is going to win her over? Women donât want to wait around forever. They like a guy who knows what he wants.â He casts another confident glance toward the bar, and Rooster follows his gaze, jaw tightening just slightly.
Bob, meanwhile, is turning a shade of red that nearly matches his squadmateâs call sign. He keeps his eyes firmly on his drink, but Phoenix catches the flush creeping up his neck and nudges him with her elbow.
âHey, Bob,â she says with a mischievous grin, âyouâre awfully quiet over there. What do you think? Whoâs got the better shot?â
Bobâs eyes widen as every head at the table turns to look at him. He stammers, his grip tightening on his glass. âIâI donât know,â he mumbles, his voice barely audible. âI, uh⌠I think sheâd go for someone⌠respectful. Kind of⌠uhâŚâ
Rooster grins, reaching over to pat Bobâs shoulder, his tone almost affectionate. âSee, Bob gets it. A guy whoâs not all in her face about it.â
Jake rolls his eyes, scoffing as he leans back. âRight. Because nothing says âcharmingâ like shyly staring into your drink.â
Bob just blushes harder, sinking a little lower in his seat as Phoenix pats his back in a show of support. âIgnore them, Bob. Theyâre just scared youâre the dark horse here,â she teases, sending Jake and Bradley a challenging look.
âOh, is that it?â Hangman laughs, tipping his glass toward Bob in mock salute. âTell you what, Bobâif she turns me down, Iâll let you take a shot.â
Rooster shakes his head, chuckling. âSure, Bob. If Jake somehow failsâand trust me, he willâyouâve got my blessing.â
Bobâs face is now a deep shade of crimson, and he lets out a nervous laugh, clearly mortified. But he canât resist glancing over toward the bar, where youâre moving easily between customers, completely unaware of the mini-drama playing out across the room.
âYou know what?â Rooster says, straightening up and giving Jake a look thatâs half-challenge, half-smirk. âWhy donât we let her decide whoâs worth her time?â
Jakeâs eyes narrow, a slow smile spreading across his face. âFine by me, Rooster. May the best man win.â
Bob practically melts into his seat, but despite his obvious embarrassment, thereâs the smallest hint of a smile tugging at the corner of his mouth as he glances at you.
-
Youâve been keeping an eye on the Dagger Squad from behind the bar, and youâve caught enough of the banter to know theyâre up to something. You can feel the weight of their stares now, so you decide to put them out of their misery. With a knowing smile, you grab a couple of fresh napkins and make your way over to the table, letting your gaze linger on one person in particular.
Bobâs leaning on the railing, doing his best to stay out of the spotlight as Jake and Bradley bicker, each too wrapped up in their little rivalry to notice you coming. Only Phoenix catches your approach, her eyes widening in excitement as she realizes whatâs about to happen. Sheâs the only one who knows, after all.
âHey, Bobby,â you say with a playful lilt, giving him a warm smile. His head snaps up, his cheeks turning an immediate shade of pink.
You can tell heâs trying to play it cool, but thereâs a flicker of pure adoration in his eyes as he takes you in. Without a word, he leans in, brushing his lips softly against yours, his hand finding your waist as he pulls you in. His usual shyness fades as he melts into the kiss, his touch growing just a little bolder, like heâs letting himself savour every second.
Around you, the entire squad has gone silent. Rooster, Hangman, and Coyote are all staring, mouths slightly open in complete disbelief. But itâs not the kiss that has them in shock. Itâs the glint of your engagement ringâhanging on a delicate chain around your neck, tucked just under the collar of your shirt. The light catches it as you pull back from Bob, and you see the realization dawn on each of their faces.
âOh, my god,â Phoenix gasps, covering her mouth, trying to stifle her laughter as she watches Jake and Bradley try to process what theyâre seeing. âNo way. All this time, and sheâs been with⌠Bobby?â Her eyes sparkle with pure delight as she glances back at you, unable to contain her excitement.
Bob, still flushed from the kiss, shifts awkwardly as he catches sight of his teammatesâ stunned expressions. He ducks his head, clearly overwhelmed by all the attention, but thereâs a shy smile tugging at the corner of his mouth as he wraps an arm around your waist, holding you close.
âWaitâŚyouâre with Bob?â Hangman says, still sounding completely baffled. He shakes his head, his usual confidence gone. âAnd youâre engaged?â
âGuess we kept it under wraps a little too well,â you say with a smirk, running a hand affectionately through Bobâs hair, watching as he blushes even deeper but relaxes into your touch. He looks at you with such genuine, quiet adoration that itâs impossible not to smile.
Rooster, still processing, lets out a low whistle, shaking his head. âWow. And here I was thinking shy guys didnât stand a chance.â
Phoenix is practically beside herself with joy, and she canât help but gloat just a little. âWell, guess what, boys?â You grin, crossing your arms. âTurns out all I wanted was the quiet one.â
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Psst, hear me out: The Beast being fucking yanderes with the ancients.
You Get Itâ˘ď¸ I mean... Did you guys see episode 6? Burning Simp Cookie is already a yandere lol. He's been there and he refuses to leave. And Shadow Milk is honestly not that far behind, he feels some type of way towards Pure Vanilla and it would be cute if it wasn't so sad and creepy lol
Really though, I just love hero/villain ships in general (always have, since long before Cookie Run ever existed) and I get a kick out of villains acting stupid over crushes (read: obsessions), and acting stupid in general. There's just something about a villain being in love with the hero to a psychotic, comical degree, and the hero rebuffing them at every turn that's just really amusing to me lol. Like what Joker sort of has with Batman, you know?
Here are my Yandere Beasts in bare-bones terms:
Burning Spice: come on, if you've read my stuff, you know EXACTLY what Yandere Spice is like lol. If not, I'll refer you to this and this, as well as my fics on AO3. If those don't tell you what Yandere Spice is like then idk how else to help you lol
Shadow Milk: if the final boss of theater/drama kids had a crush but was also a malignant narcissist of some sort lol. Absolutely DESPERATE for Vanilla's attention at all times. If he's not actively trying to worm into Vanilla's brain and harass him in his thoughts and dreams, he's in the real world brainstorming better ways to do that lol. He does not grasp why the creepy puppet shows and gaslighting attempts aren't convincing Vanilla to fall in love with him. Will attack and torment and insult Vani in one breath and then praise and love and worship him in another, because he's a histrionic clown freak with whirlwind emotions. But above all else, he literally thinks he owns Vani and is meticulously plotting the horrible and hilarious demise of any and all he perceives as a threat to their union
Eternal Sugar: World's Laziest Stalkerâ˘ď¸. Almost exclusively haunts Holly in her dreams (I have to assume that that's what her power will entail, as the Beast of Sloth); however, she's more "effective" in her wooing attempts due to her past experience as the Herald of Happiness. She actually goes out of her way to construct dreams and the like that have things in them that make Holly happy (or what she thinks makes Holly happy; she, as well as the others, has big tunnel vision and is very selfish and self-absorbed, and thus pays more lip service to her own wants than those of who she loves/obsesses over). Thankfully doesn't run into Holly in person often because that's work... but sometimes she DOES work up the nerve to go after her for real, and... well
Mystic Flour: Denial, denial, denial. Not just a river in Egypt the Golden Cheese Kingdom, but she'll say and act like otherwise. No, she does not like Dark Cacao. He robbed her of her volition and the chance to enact her will. He prevented her from freeing the world from pain and suffering. He is a stubborn fool who refuses to understand the truth. He... is very handsome. She does not like how handsome he is. It is distracting. She doesn't like dwelling on her memories of him and their encounters. She doesn't like how she came to harbor a single kernel of respect in her heart after he stood his ground against her; a kernel that she inadvertently nurtured and cultivated slowly but surely, until... no. No, she doesn't like Dark Cacao. She doesn't think about him all day. She doesn't want to try to lure him back to her land so she can trap him in the flour fog with her again. She doesn't miss feeling his dark eyes on her. She doesn't deeply resent his attachment to his people, and seek to transfer that attachment to her instead. No, she... damn it, he's ruined her. He's made her feel things again. He's made her succumb to selfishness and greed, to earthly desire and attachment - desire for HIM, attachment to HIM. All of her hard work and enlightenment gone to waste... She doesn't want to like Dark Cacao, she recognizes the folly in such a thing, but she's stuck - and so stuck is she that not only does she not really see a way out, she doesn't WANT one. She's become too content with her attachment to him too quickly. Now she has to agonize over her own foolishness, and try to keep denying that she doesn't care while also longing for his attention and wanting to do away with all that steals his attention away from her
Silent Salt: probably the least awful of the five, but he's still creepy and that's not a high bar to clear anyway lol. Has a better grasp on "normal" behavior than the others (like... he pays attention to what White Lily likes/wants and tries to adjust accordingly), but he's following her around everywhere and acting extremely violent and territorial over her towards anyone who he catches approaching her. He's legitimately, surprisingly sweet and gentle towards her; he brings her flowers, he listens to her when she asks/tells him something, he's more or less respectful of her personal space (he will try to be as physically close to her as possible, but actually backs off a little if she asks him to, only to try again, and so on and so forth)... but he's still a villain, he's still violent and creepy, he still gets angry when she pays attention to other people for too long and he has brought actual harm to others out of jealousy. He's the best of the worst but that really doesn't mean much of anything, he's still a psycho creep like the others
In short, they form a tight-knit coalition of absolutely fucking deranged freakazoids and they should all probably die :)
#i'm having more fun with this idea than I probably should#please feel free to ask me more about Yandere Beasts I welcome it wholeheartedly#writing crazy people is so much fun to me lol#cookie run kingdom#burningcheese#goldenspice#silentlily#hollysugar#mysticcacao#pureshadow#shadowvanilla#ancient cookies#beast cookies#yandere beasts#new yandere beasts tag let's goooooo
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I want to write a supernatural fic where Sam still hunts while in college.
Like, hunting has always been such a big part of his life that he just can't live without it, especially when he knows other people are going to die and/or suffer if he doesn't help them.
I want Sam to be one of those students that you know never goes to any of the classes but almost always gets an A (or at the very least a passing grade) on all the exams/assignments (he both knows from experience and studies in his free time while on the road).
I want Sam to be the weird/cool guy at school that everyone theorizes about ["Do you think he has a girlfriend?" "He must be rich or something, how else can he afford to travel so much while still attending school" (he's not BTW) "I wonder who that guy that always drives him to and from classes/exams is" (that's Dean) "So he's a passenger princess" (they've never seen him drive), etc].
Everything about the show is the same (I might keep Jess alive though, IDK, like that girl who ends up having a crush on him so she's looking into him and finds out some stuff) except he's still in school and he & Dean always cover their faces/only Dean impersonates people (that work with the state/law & stuff) so that the authorities won't be able to connect things too quickly and ambush them while there's a test or something.
Sam is literally the cryptid of the school after getting his powers, like people literally see him get visions/mumble about future events in the middle of those rare lessons he comes to/exams/assignments.
After Dean becomes a demon, people start thinking he's his drug dealer and that they're a part of some Mafia group that needs a new lawyer/future new lawyer (hence why Sam is learning law) after they keep hearing hushed conversations where Sam practically begs this Dean guy to "Just please give it to me, please Dean I don't think I can take it much longer" (assuming "it" probably means like heroin or some other type of drug. Also how they finally found out Dean's name) and Dean begrudgingly handing him a small red vial and telling him he'll give him more, sometimes directly from the source (his wrist), later. Sam also starts bringing a second, smaller, steel water bottle to school after those interactions start but almost nobody notices (or they do and there are a thousand and one new conspiracies about it and what it means, after all, it could just be coffee for all they know, they can't be sure though, and they're too scared to ask whenever they do see him and he actually stays in school for a little longer instead of instantly leaving to go somewhere. So they don't really get the chance to ask him even if they want to).
They see him "give a random girl hickeys" in the alley right beside the school (he's actually drinking Ruby's blood after she got her throat slashed/slashed her own throat just a little bit so that they won't look too suspicious) and they think that's his GF. And then some other students see him doing the same to his drug dealer's (Dean's) wrist a few days later and they don't know what to think anymore [he was desperate (read; needed a boost before a stressful exam/lesson/finals week), okay? He wasn't thinking straight and all three thought it was at least somewhat okay as long as they were being careful].
One day, during a lesson because the others know he won't answer during an exam, Bobby (because he still isn't talking to John, fuck you John) is calling him, saying it's an emergency and that they need him there ASAP. He doesn't remember to control his reaction in front of the class and now everyone further believes that he's in the Mafia and that was his boss talking to him [they vaguely remember hearing him, quietly whisper, if they need him to bring his extra guns at the start of the conversation/if he needs to kill someone/if anybody died towards the end of it (all said somewhat casually, considering the situation, mind you)].
I imagine Gabriel coming over to fuck with him one day at the school and people thinking he's part of a rival group/family (that may or may not have joined Sam's own after betraying said family, depending on the timeline) based on their interactions. On that same note, I want Castiel to be like the boss's right hand/messenger and that their boss's name/title is God/the lord (if I was in that situation, I would think their boss is very narcissistic, but I won't say anything about it because crime and I don't want to die yet). And then when Godstiel comes around, Dean, who at this point knows way more than Sam about these rumors (because unlike Sam he's actually been around), makes him seem like their new boss (he might just use it to help him get laid, like in that one episode, but IDK).
I really want to write it, and I might just do it, I just need to finish the series first so that I'll be characterizing them correctly (these are all characters I already somewhat know about/saw) so we'll see if I remember it by then.
Feel free to use this idea but also I want credit/link to the story (mainly a link) if you do use it, since I want to read it regardless of whether or not I actually write this (knowing myself, I probably will. Like 78% will).
#sam winchester#dean winchester#dean and sam#dean and sam winchester#sam and dean#sam and dean winchester#weirdcest#gencest#the winchester brothers#winchester brothers#the brothers winchester#castiel#castiel supernatural#gabriel supernatural#trickster#the trickster#bobby singer#supernatural#spn#supernatural fic#supernatural fanfiction#spn fanfic#spn fic#fic ideas#fic prompt#fanfic ideas#fanfic prompt#fanfiction ideas#fanfiction prompts#text post
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A VERY BAD REP, AND EVERYTHING IN BETWEEN â
( 420! reader x playboy! heeseung )
IN WHICH : at an exclusive private school in the city, where rich kids thought they ruled the place, heeseung finds out the girl who cheated off of him on an exam and could probably get him expelled, has an even worse reputation than him, and she doesnât seem to care about what he thinks or says.
WARNINGS: drugs, sexual content. +18.
BTW: tried my best to represent my king fanon suna rintaro in y/n. i havenât smoked in so longâŚ.. itâs been 30 years (2 weeks)âŚ.. iâm starting to forget the feeling (girl got sober) âŚ.. ok so basically i dramatized everything cause itâs a fanfic okay, donât think i take all the stuff i wrote pls and ew i wil never ever write smth like this again, iâm a fluff writer TT
WC: i aint counting allat
read more !
they say opposites attract, even in love, and for him, itâs always been true. heâs into quiet, delicate girls, the type who never speak up and just go with the flow. but no matter how sweet they are, heeseung drops them without a second thought, like theyâre nothing more than a momentary distraction after getting what he wants from them. so how did he end up in a situation where it was him doing the chasing? he never really thought he'd have to, ever.
it was almost funny, laughable even. he, of all people, accused of copying on an exam? and now facing the possibility of being expelled if he didnât find a way to make it right? it was the kind of mess he never imagined getting into.
yes, he was a player and toyed with girlsâ feelings for his own benefit, but that was it, he would never dare to stain his behavior record and affect his reputation with the school. he knew his family would kill him if he did, they were the type to always put on a face for others and everyone thought they were this perfect little rich family of three, that went on the most expensive trips and could buy anyone and anything.
he could still remember the teacherâs harsh words blaming him for this. âmiss y/n has an impeccable record of approved grades in my subject, while you, mister heeseung, barely scrape by. and in this exam, itâs your first grade above a 90. you both share the same exact answers, the same solutions. that leaves me to think you copied off her. i suggest you stop denying it and accept the punishment of suspension. if not, iâll have no choice but to speak to the principal about expelling you from this school. and your father wonât be able to save you from this one again with donations.â
heeseung slammed his locker shut with a fury, the sound echoing down the empty hallway as the final bell rang. his mind raced, thoughts spiraling. what was he going to tell his family if he actually got expelled? his family reputation couldnât fix this. the idea was unthinkable, impossible. he wasnât about to let something he didnât do ruin everything. he wouldnât accept it. not without a fight.
heâd stolen the cheat sheet, that much was true. but copying off another student? he would never do that. he had his pride, after all. the problem was, he had no idea how youâd ended up with that paper. how did you get your hands on it? and why the hell had you not even thought about changing one single answer to be slick? his mind was racing, but he wasnât about to let anyone think he was that stupid.
heeseung had never even bothered to look your way since you got to the school a year and a half ago in your leather jacket and sunglasses. your parents knew each other but you werenât the type of person heâd ever hang out with. he did know about a guy having a fling with you, and honestly, it almost drove him insane. word has gotten out you had almost driven him to the point of seeking professional help to be sane. but that wasnât even the worst thing said about you. even with your fatherâs reputation and money, you werenât safe from being on peopleâs mouths as the daughter he never wanted.
what made everything even more difficult was that he had no idea how to make you admit it was you. he didnât have your number, didnât know anything about your schedule except for the one class you both shared. confronting you in person seemed like a disaster waiting to happen. he couldnât risk you turning the whole thing around, making him look like the bad guy while you played the victim. it would be just his luck.
he had never felt so completely taken advantage of. it was always him who used people, who knew how to manipulate them into giving him exactly what he wanted. yet here he was, losing his mind over a girl heâd never even spoken to. it was ridiculous, and it pissed him off.
as the next day rolled around, he was still consumed by it. before the first period, he stood by the stone lion statue on the entrance of school, leaning against the wall next to jake and sunghoon, waiting for karina and wonyoung, as they mindlessly talked about a new prada backpack sunghoon bought yesterday. but heeseungâs mind kept drifting back to the mess with you, he tried to push it aside, focusing on the usual routine. still, the more he tried to forget, the more it nagged at him.
just as he was about to ask jake about you, since he always seemed to know everything about everyone, he stopped himself. no way was he going to ask his friend for help and look uncapable of solving things. he needed to figure this out on his own. instead, he turned his thoughts to how he could find you before the shared calculus class at the end of the day. he had to get to the bottom of this, and fast.
"heeseung!" a cheery voice called out, pulling him from his thoughts. he looked up to see karina dragging wonyoung along, both of them heading toward him, their little red-bottom heels clicking against the pavement. karina flashed him a big, playful smile and waved enthusiastically, her energy cutting through the tension that had been building all morning.
âdamn it, itâs too early in the morning for this,â heeseung muttered, rolling his eyes as they approached. jake, who had been watching the whole scene with a smirk, nudged him in the ribs. âthat girlfriend of yours, man,â he teased. heeseung just shot him a glare, clearly not amused.
the two girls made their way toward them, but just as they were about to reach the group, a loud, roaring engine cut through the morning air. before anyone could react, a sleek motorcycle zoomed in, blocking their path. the rider revved the engine once more, making it clear they werenât going anywhere until they dealt with them.
"woah, whatâs goin on?" sunghoon asked, clearly impressed by the person who had the guts to stop karina and wonyoung in their tracks. he wasnât the only one taken aback. everyone was staring as the motorcycle came to a halt. little did they know, the rider was someone heeseung had been obsessing over all morning, someone who could probably ruin both karina and wonyoungâs face with just one single punch. the tension in the air shifted instantly, and heeseung felt his heart race, but not for his girlfriendâs safety, instead, for the person who rolled around.
the motorcycle she was riding was imposing, big, dark, and matte, with electric blue accents. the kind of bike that screamed power and danger. it looked like something straight out of a movie, designed to intimidate, just like its rider. there was a certain energy about her, something that made everyone around tense up instinctively. she didnât need to say a word to command attention. her presence alone was enough to make even the most confident shrink back.
but they still stepped closer, followed by a crowd of other students who knew exactly who was under the helmet. everyone was eager to see what would happen next.
you pulled off the black helmet, letting your hair tumble out as the cold morning air hit your face, sharpening the already obvious irritation in your expression. there was an undeniable edge to your aura, something fierce and untouchable, like you thrived on chaos and didnât care who knew it. the way you stood, calm but dangerous, with an almost predatory confidence, made it clear you werenât here to play nice. karina glanced around, clearly uncomfortable in the middle of a confrontation sheâd rather avoid, but she couldnât deny what she had just done, not going unnoticed by you.
not letting her get the first word, you swung off your motorcycle, your movements sharp and deliberate. "you bitch, are you insane?" you shot at her, pointing a finger directly in her face. the students around you quickly scrambled, eager to capture what might turn into a full-blown fight. for the students watching, it was like something straight out of a teen movie. the popular âit girlâ of the school facing off against the infamous âbad girlâ. a label you despised even more than the people who threw it around. the rich kids were convinced you were a bad person just because you got high 8 out of the 7 days of the week, dressed in black and liked to waste your money getting inked.
"what are you talking about?!" karina stammered, stumbling back as she grabbed wonyoungâs hand, who seemed ready to shrink behind her in panic. they both looked like dolls, dressed in couture clothing and expensive hair accessories.
you scoffed, the memory of what happened earlier still fresh. "don't play dumb with me," you shot back, eyes narrowing. "you're the one who threw food on the road to school from your little convertible. god, are you even intelligent enough to drive?!â karinaâs face flushed with embarrassment, not thinking you would actually confront her like this, and for a moment, she looked like she might deny it. but instead, she opened her mouth. "well, i guess i should have thrown it at you then, instead of the road, since you always like to be dirty, donât you?â she laughed, looking down at your worn out shoes, which were sluthered with mud.
"dirty?" you cut her off with a bitter laugh. "you want to talk about dirty?" your voice dripped with sarcasm. "iâm not the one with half of the schoolâs dicks down my throat, while embarrassing myself chasing a guy who, the only thing he likes about me is fucking, because itâs the only time i will stop being annoying, how âbout that?â
âwell, itâs a shame that you donât have a face pretty enough to even attract a normal guyâs attention. i have seen you hanging around with those shaggy and dirty stoner animals from your old school you call men, having sex in the middle of an alley, all high and out of their minds, huh,â she insisted, pointing at you up and down.
âyouâre so full of shit karina, and itâs sad. as if youâd ever find someone that actually likes you, to listen to you talk for more than ten minutes.â you threw her a pitiful look. the students around you shifted uncomfortably, some of them glancing at each other as the tension in the air grew thicker. wonyoung, still holding onto karinaâs hand, looked like she was about to step in, but karina pulled her back. âi donât care what you think, iâm rich, iâve got tons of friends and iâm pretty, and you have always been jealous of me, just what is your problem?â
you stepped closer, your gaze never leaving hers. âlike i care about your dadâs money wash karina, donât get too carried away, it takes more than money to make someone feel less than you,â you smirked, looking at her up and down. you stepped dangerously closer quickly, making her stumble back once again and shriek, gripping onto wonyoungâs arm even stronger.
âbut it will pay your facial reconstruction bill if you keep fucking with me, got it?â you said quietly, but with a force that made the words hit harder than anything else. before she could snap back, wonyoung pulled at her sleeve, whispering something in her ear. karina hesitated, then exhaled a long breath. she wasnât stupid, karina has seen what âkinds of peopleâ you hang out with, and how bad the other person gets out of a fight with you, she was always quick to insult you, but never to continue fully.
"okay, fine. you want to clean your little tricycle?" karina said, trying to act nonchalant, taking out a huge bill from her purse. "here, i donât care, just go back to where you came from." you took the bill karina handed out harshly, splitting it in right in the middle, making her gasp, and look at the money falling on the ground, feeling totally humiliated.
not saying anything else, you turned back and mounted the motorcycle again, revving it in a way for the students around to step back, and open way for you to continue your morning, not daring to get in your way. you sped off, the roar of your bike fading into the distance of the parking lot. the boys lingered for a moment before finally making their way over to karina and wonyoung, concern written all over their faces. "you girls alright?" sunghoon asked, glancing at both of them.
karina shot him a frustrated look, her arms still crossed defensively. "yeah, whatever. i'm fine," she muttered, though her voice was tight. wonyoung stayed quiet, looking more shaken than usual, as if still processing the encounter.
the boys exchanged a few more words of reassurance, but heeseung barely heard them. his mind was miles away, consumed by the memory of you. your sharp words, your defiant stance, the way youâd made it clear you werenât to be messed with. he couldnât shake the image of you. he couldnât let it go. not now. heeseung was used to being in control, used to getting what he wanted without a second thought. but you, you were different. there was something about you that made him want to find out more, something about the way you handled the whole situation that had him itching to confront you, face-to-face, but he knew he couldnât, not unless he wanted to hear karina yell at him nonstop in a fit of jealousy.
"you good, man?" jake's voice broke through his thoughts, and heeseung looked up, blinking. "yeah," he said, trying to shake off the feeling. but deep down, he knew he wasnât really fine.
as the day went on and classes shifted, lunch break came to an end, and before long, it was time for the dreaded calculus class. you sauntered to your seat at the back of the classroom, right by the window, and dropped into the chair. with a bored sigh, you pulled out your phone, scrolling through it without a care, eyes barely glancing up. it was weird seeing you stick around this long on a school day. usually, youâd slip out early or roll in late, and no one ever said a word. you never had too many absences, always acing every exam. and for that reason, the teachers didnât question it, because you had this way of making it look effortless, like the rules didnât even apply to you.
as the class dragged on, something landed softly on your desk, just a small note. you glanced over and saw the girl next to you, the one with the big round glasses, her eyes wide with nervous energy. the second you looked her way, she flinched, shrinking back into her seat. she quickly pointed to the guy sitting next to her, her face practically pleading for you to read whatever nonsense heâd scribbled.
you gave him a weird look, your brow raised in silent confusion, before you slowly unfolded the note, your fingers moving deliberately as if you had all the time in the world. it read, âwhat do you think youâre doing? why did you copy off of me on the exam?â
you snorted at the message, and instantly, the memory hit you. it was the first time youâd let yourself go, forgetting about grades, staying way too long at some random house drugging yourself with something new, until blackout, two days away from home in your ride. you hadnât made it back in time to study, so you did what you had to do. you texted a contact at school to get you the test. lucky for you, he knew someone in your class who had managed to steal the cheat sheet, and just like that, you had it in your hands.
ânone of your businessâ you wrote back, your fingers moving quickly as you folded the note and slid it over to the girl. she hesitated for a second, then took it from you, passing it to him discreetly like it was some kind of underground deal.
a few moments later, the note came back to you. you unfolded it, and your eyes scanned the words. âyou have to admit you cheated off of me, iâm risking expulsion.â as if you actually gave a damn about his risk. you shot him a cold glance, then made a subtle motion with your hand, signaling for him to follow you out of the classroom, while you carried your belongings, not planning on returning.
after a few seconds, he finally slipped out of the classroom, meeting you in the empty hallway. "hey, so i really need you to admit you cheated off of me, i could get suspended, even expelled, and i'm not willing to take that kind of punishment for you," he started, his voice full of desperation. but you didnât let him finish. you raised a hand, cutting him off, and his words trailed off as he stood there, waiting for you to say something.
"iâm sorry, who even are you?" you asked, shaking your head, genuinely confused. "iâm still trying to figure out why you think iâd ever admit to cheating on a test for you." your voice was casual, like the whole situation didnât even faze you.
"because you did," he said, his tone dripping with self-righteousness. "itâs the right thing to do. you need to get suspended for cheating off of me." he smirked, as if he was the one holding all the power now. "and if you donât, iâll just tell them i caught you fucking someone in the bathroom for the test answers or something. you wouldnât want that, would you?" that made you laugh.
"okay, listen, mr. whoever-you-are," you said, raising an eyebrow, "iâm not doing shit for you. after all, itâs my word against yours, which iâm guessing doesnât mean much, considering you're the one getting blamed for cheating." you leaned in, a smirk playing at your lips. "and as for the fucking thing? iâve been caught plenty before. the worst theyâll do is throw me in detention. so go ahead, do as you please." you poked his shoulder, the gesture almost mocking. he stood there for a second, his smile fading as he processed what you'd said. you could tell he wasn't used to being called out like that, or having the cards reversed, but then he leaned in, his voice lowering, like he was trying to pull some kind of play.
"you know," he said, his tone smooth, "a pretty girl like you... you don't really want to be known as the one who got away with cheating. people would start talking, saying youâre not enough for a school like this, wouldn't they?" he stepped closer, his eyes scanning you like he was sizing you up, "but hey, i get it. you don't want to get caught up in more drama. maybe i can help with that... if you just admit it was you."
this couldnât be happening, you just wondered how in the world did this guy not know of your reputation, he was embarrassing himself so much at the moment. no boys in school got near you for that exact same reason, and here he was, thinking he could word his way into manipulating you, as if you didnât know how to play your own game. you were known for being this maniatic crazy bitch with a motorcycle, who hang out with âlowlifesâ, knew how to fight and that was only useful to get drugs from, also probably slept around with teachers because they didnât think youâre smart enough to study. youâve been told so many things, that what he said didnât even bother you.
you rolled your eyes, clearly unimpressed. "oh, so now you're trying to play the good guy card?" you laughed dryly, leaning against the lockers. "nice try, but i'm not some stupid girl you can sweet-talk into doing something."
he chuckled, clearly not giving up. "come on, baby," he said, his voice turning smooth and almost coaxing, "we both know you like the thrill of a little risk. how about we make a nice deal, you admit it was you, and maybe we... hang out sometime. you know, just us. could be fun."
you raised an eyebrow, rolling your eyes again. "wow, really? you are so considerate of me, but no, i donât want your reduce reuse recycled dick, i'm not interested."
he stepped closer again, trying to intimidate you, but you weren't moved. you just pushed him back with a lazy finger, eyes never leaving his. "you clearly donât know what youâre doing, or even how to talk to me," you said, voice dripping with mockery. "i'm not impressed. iâve seen your type a hundred times. and it's honestly fucking pathetic."
he frowned, his jaw tightening, but you didn't care. you weren't here for his tantrums. "seriously, you think this is gonna work on me?" you continued, your voice low and sharp. "you're the one who's gonna look stupid if you keep pushing this. i'm not gonna admit. and if you keep threatening me, we can always settle this another way, iâm sure you know how to fight with those big boy muscles right?" you squeezed his arm, making heeseung shudder, almost feeling a tingle.
you turned to leave, tossing him a final glance over your shoulder. "good luck, though," you added, your voice flat. "i'm sure your suspension month will be really fun." you tossed over your shoulder, voice dripping with sarcasm. "but don't worry, you probably already have a few girls your way to help you feel validated and accompanied."
heeseung just stood there, watching you leave and soon disappear onto another hallway, probably escaping classes. but that did not worry him, we couldnât let himself worry over a girl like you. you would clearly never fall for his words. guys like heeseung, weâre almost like easy prey for you. too weak and easy, thinking they dominated the whole world, fucking around with girls, throwing massive parties and golfing every sunday with their dad. when in reality they probably didnât know how to unclog a toilet.
they pissed you off so much, he pissed you off, and now your day was ruined. so almost two hours later, you found yourself on a complete different town to the south, entering an worn out house, kicking the door open. the house brought back many memories, too many. from when you lived here, and not back with your father, in a place you didnât belong.
"who's here?" a slurred voice called from the kitchen, barely cutting through the thumping music. the place reeked of stale smoke and something sharper, like bleach or chemicals. dim, flickering lights barely illuminated the clutter, casting long shadows over cracked furniture and empty beer cans. scattered on the floor were people, sprawled in various stages of oblivion, some twitching, others motionless, all trapped in their own haze. the walls, stained and peeling, seemed to pulse with the low vibrations of the bass, as if the house itself was barely holding it all together. the house which was previously your motherâs, was now just a usual abandoned place that your friends utilized to hang out in.
"damn, this place is a mess. why didn't you wait for me?" you muttered, stepping into the kitchen. your friends were slouched around a grimy breakfast table, barely looking up as one of them finished snorting white lines off the edge. the counter was littered with crumpled pink blunt wrappers.
"yo! gigi, stop the music!" yeonjun shouted, sniffling as he shot up from his seat, stumbling a bit before he lurched forward to hug you. he almost tripped over his own mismatched-socks covered feet, but when he finally reached you, he inhaled deeply, as if your scent, clean and free of any substances, was a breath of fresh air in the chaos of the room. his grip tightened for a moment, his eyes flickering with a mix of relief.
"iâm not your bitch," giselle muttered, rolling her red-ish eyes as she leaned over to turn down the blaring music. her long acrylic nails clicked sharply against the plastic radio, the sound cutting through the tension in the room. she barely looked at yeonjun as she did it, her expression more annoyed than anything else.
you laughed at her comment, shaking your head, and then moved to hug her, pushing yeonjun off you in the process. he stumbled back, slightly irritated but too dazed to really react, while giselleâs stiff posture softened just a little as you wrapped your arms around her. her eyes flickered with something close to annoyance, but there was a hint of a smirk tugging at the corner of her lips. you pulled away from giselle, giving her a teasing look. "so, what's the plan for tonight?" you asked, shifting your attention to the other strangers in the room, as they lazily got back to their own little worlds. yeonjun was still rubbing his nose, barely paying attention, while giselle just shrugged, taking a drag from her cigarette before flicking it into an ashtray.
âweâre hitting that party in the hill later,â she said, her voice flat but laced with anticipation. "gonna get crossfaded, maybe do a little more. jayâs been asking about you non-stop, by the way." she giggled. you raised an eyebrow at that, crossing your arms. "jay?" you repeated, a little surprised. you didn't think heâd be the type to obsess over anything, let alone you. "what does he want with me?"
she leaned back in her chair, a mischievous glint in her eye. "heâs obsessed you and your dumb tattoos. that night you two spent together? yeah, he canât stop talking about it.â she paused, letting the words hang in the air like a secret. âguess heâs got a thing for you.â
you snorted, leaning against the counter, trying not to let it bother you too much. it was funny, people youâve slept with always seemed to fixate on your exterior. but jay? he was a different story. you didnât really care about whatever weird little crush he might have, though. he was now from a different crowd, and would never cross that line to be with you.
âhe does know i changed schools right?â you said. your new school was a whole different world, elite, private, a playground for the wealthy and connected. kids with silver spoons, flashy cars, and tailored suits. a lot of them were insufferable, like karina, but you didnât mind. it was easy to stand out, to be yourself in a place where most people just followed the rules. since your mother disappeared and your dad took you back, youâve been placed in a world you donât belong, and clearly donât mind not belonging.
they had their porsche, you had your r7. they had private security, and you had your little hello kitty knife. but here, with giselle and the others? it was different. a lot more laid-back, the students knew how to have fun without all the airs and graces of your new world. they were down to earth, fun, and honest, none of the pretentious bullshit that came with being surrounded by rich kids. they had their flaws, sure, but you loved hanging out with them. it was like coming back home after a long trip to a hotel casino, where everyone was more concerned with status than actually living.
giselle noticed the shift in your mood and grinned, as if reading your thoughts. "i know, i know," she said, her voice softened, almost sympathetic. "but, hey, you're still cool with us. we donât care about your new rich kid school. weâre just down for a good time."
"yeah, alright. iâm down. just donât expect me to get too crazy, my dadâs expecting me before five am, he knows how shit goes here,â you let out a quiet sigh, glancing over at yeonjun who was now half-focused on his phone, tapping away furiously with his thumb. "so, iâm guessing youâve already got the stuff lined up for tonight?" you asked, a smirk tugging at your lips.
he looked up at you, still slightly dazed, and nodded. "yeah, i texted my guy next door. heâs got everything we need. should be ready by the time we leave."
âdonât worry, iâll go,â you didnât need to ask twice. despite your better judgment, you were already used to this kind of thing. you pushed off the counter, giving giselle a nod. "iâll be back in a minute, you both stop inhaling shit and try to sober up, iâm not a babysitter," you said casually, already walking toward the door.
"take your time, don't get too caught tho," she called after you, voice almost playful, but with that edge of concern. the door slammed shut behind you, and you stepped out into the cold evening air. it wasnât far, the dealerâs place was literally next door, tucked behind a run-down convenience store that no one seemed to go into.
the door to the small house was already cracked open when you arrived. you knocked lightly, stepping back to make sure no one would spot you. a moment later, a guy with messy hair and a hoodie poked his head out, his eyes scanning you quickly before he motioned for you to come in. "yo, whatâs up?" he greeted, his tone laid-back but sharp, like he had done this a thousand times before
âyeonjun sent me," you said, slipping inside. you didnât need to say much, his face lit up as soon as you mentioned the name. yeonjun was a regular here, always popping in for one thing or another. the guy didnât ask too many questions, which was fine by you. "right, right," he said, disappearing into a cluttered room at the back. you heard the rustle of plastic, the clink of glass. he returned with some small bags of pills in his hand, sliding them across the counter. "this should be good for the night. tell yeonjun he owes me. i threw a little present in there for you, pretty."
you nodded with a smile, taking the bag, your fingers brushing against the cool plastic. it was always the same, but you still hated the feeling of this whole transaction, sketchy, rushed. "thanks," you muttered, seeing a little extra, and slipping the bags into your jacket pocket before heading back toward the door.
"catch you later," he called after you, and you didnât bother to respond.
as you headed back toward the house, the night started to feel more like a blur of its own, the sun setting into a canvas of dark and light colors.
when you pushed the door open again, giselle was already eyeing you, her arms crossed and a smirk playing on her lips. "got it?" she asked, and you gave a quick nod. "yeah, weâre good to go," you said, tossing the bags onto the table where yeonjun had plopped back down. he gave you a lazy thumbs up.
the party was exactly what youâd expect from a house like this, small, run-down, but buzzing with an energy that could only come from a group of teenagers living for the night. the kind of place where people got high, drunk, and fucked without any care in the world. the walls were covered in posters and graffiti, the floors littered with empty bottles and crumpled cans. music thudded through cheap speakers, competing with the chaotic chatter and the occasional shout of someone daring someone else to do something ridiculous or threatening to start a fight.
when you, yeonjun, and giselle arrived, the front door was wide open. keeho was standing there, practically bouncing with excitement, already tipsy from whatever heâd been drinking. his hair was an absolute mess, eyes slanted and tired-looking, and he had lipstick stains all over his neck, but his grin was infectious as he waved you over.
âyo, rich girl! you made it!â he exclaimed, his voice a little slurred, and he pulled you all in for a quick, sloppy hug. "was starting to think you forgot about me, we gotta get you three started!" without missing a beat, keeho grabbed a half-empty bottle of cheap vodka from the floor and shoved it into your hands, urging you to take a swing. his laugh was loud and carefree, and it felt like you were already swept into the madness. you hesitated for a second, but then shrugged and tipped the bottle back. the burn of the alcohol hit the back of your throat, sharp and bitter, but it didnât matter.
giselle grinned and knocked back her own drink, wiping her mouth as she handed the bottle to yeonjun, who eagerly took a swig, his eyes already glazed over. keehoâs grin only widened, as if he had orchestrated some kind of victory. âhell yeah, letâs go!â
you all pushed past him into the house, the noise of the party almost overwhelming at first. in the main room, there were already people sprawled on couches, a couple of them making out in the corner, while others lounged around in various states of intoxication. the air was thick with the scent of weed and sex. âokay, so, knowing you yeonjun, hotboxing only in the basement bathroom, i donât want to repeat what happened last month in my room,â keeho turned to your group with a serious face all of a sudden. yeonjun rolled his eyes and started arguing, and giselle joined in, making you leave the scene relentlessly.
as you wandered further into the house, you spotted jay almost immediately. he was leaning against the wall, a drink in his hand, his eyes scanning the room until they landed on you. the second he saw you, his entire demeanor changed, his gaze locked onto you with a sharp intensity, like you were the only person in the room. you couldnât help but notice it. there was something almost obsessive in the way he watched you, his lips curling into a small but knowing smile. you werenât sure if he was just drunk or if it was something more, but you knew he wasnât just here for a good time. he was here for you.
âhey,â jay said as you approached, his voice low and a little too eager, like he was trying to hide just how much he wanted to pull you into his orbit. âglad you showed up. i wasnât sure if you would.â
you raised an eyebrow and took the drink from him, taking a sip, already sensing the weird energy from him. "you act like i'm some kind of mystery," you said, your tone light, but there was a hint of warning in your voice.
jay just laughed, though it sounded a little nervous. he shifted, trying to get closer, but you didnât exactly encourage it. "no, no. i mean, i was hoping youâd show up," he said, clearly not even noticing how desperate he sounded. "i donât know. i just... i couldnât stop thinking about you." his words hung there in the air for a moment, too heavy for what was supposed to be a casual conversation. you glanced away, trying to shake the awkwardness of it. he was just supposed to be a random hook up, and now he was obsessed.
"yeah, iâm too sober for this, i need a minute," you cut him off, shrugging his hand away, your tone sharper than you intended. the last thing you wanted right now was another round of jay following you around again. you managed to slip into the bathroom, the noise of the party muffled behind you. the moment the door clicked shut, you let out a sigh of relief, leaning back against the door for a second, trying to shake off the weight of jayâs attention.
reaching into your pocket, you pulled out your phone, hoping for a distraction. you had been waiting on a text from your motorcycle repair center all night, hoping they'd finally gotten back to you about the part you needed. just as you started scrolling through your messages, trying to ignore the distant thumping of bass and the muffled laughter from outside, you heard the bathroom door creak open behind you. before you could even turn around, you felt a hard bump against your shoulder, someone colliding with you unexpectedly.
"hey!" the voice was sharp, and the tone was ready to unleash a curse. but then, the voice shifted, a more amused, almost playful note creeping in. "wait, hold up, you're cute."
you blinked, turning to face the girl who had crashed into you. she was standing there, eyes still wide with what couldâve been irritation, but her lips were curled into a smirk now. she looked like she was about to say something more, but the words faltered when she took another quick look at you. she was a couple of inches shorter than you, her dark hair pulled into a messy ponytail, with eyeliner that looked like it had been hastily done, smudging a little at the edges. she wore a worn-out band tee, black jeans, and had that 'i donât care' attitude.
you raised an eyebrow, still holding your phone, but not making any immediate movement. "thanks," you said dryly, not sure if she was being sarcastic or genuine. âryujin,â she continued, âand you are?â
ây/n, y/n l/n,â you introduced yourself, almost sounding too righteous.
âyou good y/n?â she asked, her voice almost too soft, the kind of softness that could break you without a word. âfuck no, i lost my friends and i need to get high right now,â you laughed, running your hand through your hair.
âoh really?â before you could respond, ryujin was already in front of you, close enough that you could smell the alcohol on her breath, feel the heat radiating off her body. âi can help with that,â she whispered, and there was something about the way she said it that made your pulse spike. she was clearly offering something more than simple. she was offering you something you hadnât tried before.
she reached into her pocket, pulling out something small, a needle. you froze, your chest tightening, but the pull was still there. you werenât thinking. you were just so desperate, it would happen again, you would take something from a random hot person. the needle gleamed in her hand, sharp and cold under the dim lighting. you didnât need to ask what it was, she didnât need to explain. you could already feel it, the ache of wanting something to take you somewhere else, to make this noise in your head stop. you were sick of it.
her eyes flicked to yours, dark and knowing, like she could see straight through you. "you sure?" she asked, but there was no question in her voice. it was more like a dare. your breath hitched, your heartbeat louder than the music. you looked at her, and for a split second, everything felt still. her eyes held you captive, like she was waiting for you to decide whether to break or not. and then, without saying anything, you nodded.
she didnât hesitate. one swift motion, and the needle was at your arm. the sting was sharp, more real than anything youâd felt. the rush of it hit you instantly. a sudden heat spread through your veins, like fire lacing under your skin. the world around you blurred, the noise fading into the background. you felt something.
it was almost too much to handle, too quick. your body jolted with the rush of it, the sense of floating, of being untethered from everything. and then, before you could even catch your breath, ryujin was kissing you. it was hard, messy, raw. her lips were insistent, pulling you deeper into the chaos, as if she was swallowing every ounce of your pain. it wasnât gentle, it was desperate. like she wanted to take everything from you and leave you empty, but at the same time, filled.
you kissed her back, caught in the haze, your body responding before your mind could catch up. the high was creeping in fast, too fast, but it felt good. it felt like everything was finally softening, the noise, the pressure, the expectations, all of it was dissolving with every second that passed.
when she finally pulled back, you were breathless. the world was spinning, but in a way that felt almost right, like you werenât out of control, but floating in some kind of blissful wreckage. âthatâs better,â she whispered, her voice low, smoky, and satisfied. âkissing makes you not feel how much this bitch hurts,â she laughed âor so iâve been told.â
you just stared at her, too buzzed to say anything, but feeling a kind of calm you hadnât known in what felt like forever. the pain was gone now, swallowed by the buzz, the heat, and the way she looked at you. like you were both on the edge, and neither of you cared whether you fell off. the rush from the needle still pulsed through your veins as you stepped out of the bathroom, feeling a bit unmoored, like your body was drifting through space. the party felt louder, the music a distant thump in your chest. everything was hazy, like you were floating, and the crowd around you seemed to blur, their faces indistinct. you were just moving.
without thinking, you found yourself at the center of the living room, where bodies pressed against each other, the air thick with sweat and smoke. you let the beat pull you in, letting go of the last vestiges of control. you didnât care anymore, about anything, anyone. you just moved, your body responding to the rhythm like it had a life of its own, and for the first time tonight, you felt alive.
you danced with strangers, faces you didnât recognize, their hands on your hips or shoulders, the energy bouncing between you all like an electric current. their movements were reckless, free, and somehow, it felt like you belonged here, in the middle of this mess. the high made everything feel vivid. intense. like every touch, every glance was magnified.
a guy leaned in close, his breath warm on your neck. you didnât pull away, letting him get close enough to whisper in your ear. you could barely understand what he was saying, but his hands were on your waist, tugging you closer. you let him, lost in the sensation of being wanted, of not caring what anyone thought. your body was moving like it was made for this chaos. you didnât think. you just felt.
the music shifted, the bass pumping harder, and for a moment, everything became a blur of neon lights and sweaty bodies, spinning like a dizzying cyclone. you let yourself get swept up in it, lost in the noise and the movement, until you couldnât keep up anymore. the energy in your legs started to fade, your body heavy and tired. you were buzzing too much to care, but eventually, your feet were no longer dancing, just shuffling you toward the edge of the room.
you stumbled to a couch, sinking into the cushions with a long, relieved sigh. the room around you seemed to shift, the music muffled now, everything distant, like you were underwater. you tried to keep your eyes open, but the pull of exhaustion was too strong. you just couldnât fight it.
your head sank into the back of the couch, and in a matter of seconds, you were out, completely, utterly gone. the noise of the party continued around you, but you were far away now, floating in the quiet of your mind, somewhere where nothing could touch you. the high, the spinning, the chaos, it all faded to a distant hum. you were weightless, drifting in nothingness, as everything slipped away.
you woke up the next morning to the harsh sound of someone shouting, the words barely making sense at first. âeveryone get up and get the hell out!â keehoâs voice rang through the room, piercing the fog of sleep that still clung to you. blinking, you squinted at the blinding light creeping through the window, the ache in your head reminding you of just how much but so little had happened the night before. and you tried to suppress the feeling of vomiting.
you barely had time to process everything when keeho appeared at the door, his eyes wide in sudden panic when he saw you sitting there, a disheveled mess on the couch. âwait... youâre here? yeon and gigi were crazy looking for you last night,â he stammered, clearly flustered. you could tell he hadnât noticed you before, hadnât realized youâd passed out here.
âyeah, i think someone gave me dope, âm not sure,â you muttered, trying to shake the sleepiness from your mind. âcould use some clothes though. i didnât exactly plan on crashing here and i gotta get my ass to school or my father will actually kill me.â
keeho nodded quickly, his face flushing in embarrassment as he glanced around the room like he didnât know where to look. âyeah, yeah, no problem. iâve got some stuff, just go to my room. thereâs a drawer with girl clothes from... you know. just grab whatever.â he gestured to the hallway.
you stood up, a little unsteady on your feet, and made your way toward his room. it wasnât far, but the house felt like a maze now, the remnants of last nightâs chaos still hanging in the air. the stale scent of alcohol and smoke clung to everything, and you could hear people stirring, mumbling groggily as they shuffled about, trying to piece together the aftermath of whatever they did.
keehoâs room was a mess too, clothes and half-empty bottles scattered across the floor, papers crumpled on his desk. you spotted the drawer he mentioned and pulled it open. inside, there were a mix of clothes, some definitely not your style.
you pulled out a small crop top, the fabric soft against your skin as you slipped it on. the shirt hugged you in just the right way, but the way it exposed a sliver of your tattoos on your side gave you an odd sense of power. something about the ink on your skin made you feel more present, more you, even in the haze of everything that had gone wrong in the last month, not listening to your brain. you quickly grabbed a pair of athletic shorts from the drawer, the fabric light and comfortable, though they were a bit tight on your hips. it didnât matter. you werenât here to impress anyone.
you didnât know what you were expecting to feel in that moment, but it certainly wasnât this. it was a weird mix of exhaustion and emptiness, and so thirsty. but at least you werenât in yesterdayâs clothes. stepping out of the room, you took a deep breath, preparing to face the aftermath.
keeho was still in the living room, shouting at people to get out, his tone half-annoyed, half-caring, like he was trying to maintain some level of order in the madness. he saw you and gave you an awkward wave. âyo, you good?â he asked, trying to act casual.
âyeah, just tired,â you mumbled, rubbing your eyes. âwhereâs the exit?â
keeho pointed to the door and went back to yelling at whoever was still sprawled on the couch. you werenât in the mood for much interaction. just get out. get back to the north. you walked toward the door, weaving through the mess of bodies and vomit. the cool morning air hit you as soon as you stepped outside, the bright sun already making the world feel like it had reset itself. everything was sharp, clear. the chaos of the night felt distant now, as if you were waking up from a bad dream.
you tried not to think about it as you walked away from the house, the reality of last night still buzzing in your head. you pulled out your phone and called an uber, the cool screen a brief distraction from the foggy mess of your mind. as you waited for it to arrive, you kept thinking about the night. about the haze, the people, the weird feeling of everything slipping through your fingers. you needed to forget it, or at least stop accepting drugs from friendly girls in bathrooms, you had to stick to smoking-only, or your body would end up on the cover of a newspaper with a bad name. you slid into the back of the car when it arrived, the familiar hum of the engine lulling you into a kind of dull trance as you made your way back to the city.
the ride was quiet, a smooth hum of traffic and soft music in the background. it didnât take long to get back to the luxurious academy, but as you stepped out of the car and walked through the heavily guarded gates, you could feel the eyes on you. people were already filing into the backyard tables for lunch, and you were late, again.
you didnât care, though. you didnât care about anything right now. the school was a blur of clean clothes and sharp faces, everyone looking polished and perfect, the exact opposite of how you felt and looked. you ignored the stares, walking past a couple of your classmates who were giving you the side-eye, their whispers barely audible over the din of voices. but you could feel the weight of it. the judgment. the fact that you werenât exactly like everyone else here, and they knew it.
you made your way to the lunch hall, where your only acquaintance was already sitting, glancing up as you walked in. chaeryeongâs eyes flickered between you and the time. you slid into the seat across from her, barely noticing the food she'd saved for you. you didnât have the energy for the usual small talk or the smiley faces she always wore.
âare you okay, y/n?â chaeryeong asked softly. you still couldnât figure out why she stuck around. maybe it was because youâd protected her in some way, kept her safe from karina and her ridiculous mean girl act. chaeryeong was too kind, too good-hearted. she didnât deserve any of that. you nodded without thinking, just going through the motions. you took a bite of the sandwich, but the food was tasteless, like everything else was. somewhere deep down, you knew you had to get your shit together, but for now, it was easier to keep pretending that everything was fine.
the real reason why you started being even more reckless than before was simple. you missed her. and you hated yourself for it, for missing your mother, the one who abandoned you a year and a half algo. a part of you wanted to believe this was all a plan for you to move in with your rich father and get yourself a place in society, but deep down you knew she found another family with one of the hundreds of men she slept with every night to be able to pay rent. not like you were actually hurt, though. everything you did, every choice you made, was for her. you liked to think she was in a better place now, not living off of selling herself. in your mind, you had to be your best version, just for her. not for that father you have, which was the first one to actually leave, after hearing the news of your mother being pregnant with you. but karma got him, and now he was stuck with you.
he just lets you be, lets you invite your friends over and make a mess. after all, he has maids to clean up after you. but you werenât about to be that much of a burden, which is why you pushed yourself to excel academically. your mother always said, âevery single person is a nobody, no matter how rich or poor. the only thing that makes us different is our drive to be better for ourselves.â
you stand up abruptly, pushing your chair back with a little too much force. "i'm going for a smoke," you mutter, barely looking at chaeryeong. before she can say anything and tell you how drugs are ruining you, youâre already heading out of the cafeteria, your steps quick and determined. you make your way to your locker, your fingers fumbling slightly as you pull out a couple of blunts, the familiar smell of them grounding you.
sliding past the neat hallways, you cut through the back of the school, where the gym equipment is stored, away from the eyes of teachers and nosy students. itâs quiet here, the air thick with the scent of rubber and old wood. you light up without hesitation, the first drag hitting your lungs like a small relief. for a moment, it's just you, the world outside fading into the background. you then take a slow hit, the smoke filling your lungs again, and for a second, it feels like everything slows down. you exhale, watching the thin trail of smoke twist and curl in the air before disappearing. the taste is bitter, but it doesnât matter. itâs the quiet and thatâs important right now.
until it wasnât. from the corner of your eye, you catch movement, footsteps crunching against the gravel. you look up, and there he is, the guy from yesterday. the same cocky grin, the same aura of someone whoâs too used to getting what they want. he was dressed in a faux-fur jacket.
âwhat the hellâŚâ you watched him get closer, his nose slightly scrunching at the smoke coming out your mouth.
"looks like we started on the wrong track," he says, leaning against the chain-link fence with that insufferable smirk still on his face. "nameâs heeseung," he adds, like you should be impressed.
you blink, connecting the dots in your head. heeseung. the rich kid. the usual playboy. and then, it clicks, heâs with karina. the thought hits you like a cold splash of water. of course. heâs here because of her. to bribe you, maybe, or to mess with you, make you look bad in front of everyone. you exhale, the smoke swirling between you as you size him up. "what dâya want?" you ask, your voice flat, not bothering to hide the growing annoyance.
he wrinkles his nose, taking in the air like heâs just stepped into a dumpster. "really smells like shit here, and you look even worse," he says with a disgusted chuckle, glancing around like heâs considering whether or not to leave. you canât help but laugh, the sound rough but genuine. âhe really is a piece of work,â you think, watching his discomfort. without missing a beat, you take another hit, leaning back against the wall as you blow out the smoke. "maybe it's just you," you say with a smirk, your voice teasing but cold.
heeseung raises an eyebrow, clearly not expecting that response, but you can see the hint of a smile pulling at the corner of his mouth. heâs not as untouchable as he thinks. heeseungâs eyes flicker down to your exposed arms and stomach, the tattoos that snake along your skin, and you catch the shift in his expression. heâs staring, but itâs not the way he was a second ago, this is different. "did those hurt?" he asks, his tone almost tentative, like heâs unsure if he should even ask. you raise an eyebrow, glancing at him like heâs just asked the dumbest question in the world.
you stare at him for a long second, then pull in a slow breath. "what do you think?" you say, deadpanning. "of course they did." he blinks, suddenly awkward, rubbing the back of his neck. "right. uh..." he trails off, his gaze flicking around like heâs trying to find something else to say.
"are you cold?" he asks finally, his eyes narrowing slightly at your lack of layers. youâre barely dressed for fall, your shirt thin and your shorts almost too small for the weather. the chill in the air seems to be getting to him more than itâs getting to you. you snort, the sharp edge of your laugh cutting through the tension. "worry about yourself," you mutter, pulling another drag. itâs not like you were cold, itâs more that you werenât going to admit it to him.
he watches you for a moment, brow furrowed, clearly not buying it. his eyes flicker between your face and the way youâre standing. "yeah, okay," he says, though it sounds more like he's humoring you than agreeing. heeseung takes a step closer, his hands slipping into the pockets of his hoodie as he looks at you with a mix of concern and reluctance. "you know, if you really arenât fine, i could always-â he cuts himself off, glancing away for a second, as though considering something before shaking his head. "never mind. itâs not that cold anyway, right?"
âstop trying to make small talk, hedeun-â
âitâs heeseung,â he interrupted, visibly bothered at you getting his name wrong.
âitâs whatever, just tell me what you want, i donât like spending much time with people like you,â you sighed. âwhat are you really here for?â
âi heard you sell,â heeseung started, making you let out a loud laugh. âif all you wanted was to smoke, you couldâve just asked me to share, iâm not a monster,â you extended your blunt towards him, but he declined. âi also heard about your mother, and about your old school, and everything about it,â he swallowed, nervously fiddling with his hands, contradicting with his harsh exterior. you raised an eyebrow, the edge of a smirk pulling at the corner of your mouth as you listen to him, the words rolling off his tongue with a strange mix of nervousness and something else, like heâs trying to explain himself but doesnât really know how. itâs not exactly what you expected, but itâs almost worse.
"is that so?" you reply, voice flat but laced with a quiet venom. you cross your arms over your chest, leaning back slightly as if the conversation doesnât deserve your full attention. "so, you did all this⌠research on me, huh? i bet everyone had a lot of nice things to say." it was a weird situation, when you changed schools, all the girls were all over you, excited for a new girl, but as soon as they saw who you were, they escaped, not wanting anything to do with you besides get some smoke and pills.
you couldnât blame them, you didnât want to hang out with them either. but karina stayed, until you made the âmistakeâ of dating the guy she liked at that moment, and since then, she made the promise to destroy your life, if only she could even try.
he seems to falter under your gaze, his eyes dropping to the ground for a moment. "i just... i wanted to understand. i wasnât trying to judge you or anything. i just..." he rubs his hands together, clearly uncomfortable. "i guess i just thought itâd make sense to know who you are before, well, before we talked again."
you can feel the sharpness in the air, his attempt at an apology or explanation almost laughable. you donât need his pity. âso, you went and found out about me. what now?â
he looks up at you, a bit of guilt coloring his expression, but itâs hard to tell whether heâs more upset about the fact that youâre not impressed, or that his research didnât give him the right answers. "i just-" he stops, rubbing the back of his neck again, looking more like a kid whoâd gotten caught in a lie than a guy trying to make amends, secretly trying to manipulate you. "i didnât mean to come off like that. i just... i donât know how to read you."
your eyes narrow, sizing him up. "well, you can start by not making this about me. whatever you think you found out, thatâs your problem." you tilt your head, voice going a little colder. "youâre not the first to assume shit about me. and everything i told everyone on this place about me, is barely the surface, so you can do with that what you want. but iâm not here for your guilt trip."
for a moment, it looks like he might say something else, but he just bites his lip instead, clearly unsure how to break through the wall youâve just put up. and youâre fine with that. heeseung had no idea why you were being so hard. why he couldnât get to you like he could with other girls. for some strange reason, he seemed drawn to you, almost as if you were here to save him from the horrible destiny that it is to be with karina. but you didnât seem the slightest interested in him. and he hated that. he hated the fact that he felt like you were unconsciously pulling him in, but he couldnât do the same to you.
only, that he could. and he was doing it. you could see it in his eyes, the sparkle for the unknown, you were almost an escapatory for him. from his rich kid, player, facade or maybe his own true personality. you felt the extreme change in demeanor he had since talking to you yesterday, after realizing you werenât like the girls from his school. he seemed way more open today, and way more relaxed. but you werenât about to be his little side distraction in his perfect, cushioned life. you werenât just some novelty.
"good conversation, heeseung," you muttered, clicking your tongue as you stubbed out the blunt against the cement wall you were leaning on, then started to walk away. before you could get too far, you heard him call after you. "hey, wait up!"
you turned back to find a faint desperation in his eyes. "sunghoon's throwing a little something tonight, and i know you donât usually hang with people like us, but you should come. we might need some of that stuff youâve got." he gestured to the blunt in your hand. it was almost endearing, how he treated something so simple like it was a secret, like it was taboo. the gap between you two seemed clearer than ever.
âiâll make sure to get you something good, i hope you can handle it,â you gave him a small smile. heeseung watched you walk away, the weight of your words hanging in the air between you. he was used to girls like karina, who flattered him, who followed him, who played by the rules of his world. but you? you were something else. something he couldnât quite figure out. he didnât know why, but something about you made him feel off-balance.
âyouâre not an escapade. youâre not just some distraction,â he thought to himself, eyes narrowing in confusion. youâre different. something about you. you could ground him. he didnât know what it was. it wasnât just the exterior, the rough edges, or the way you didnât give a shit about his family name or his money. it wasnât just the way you made him feel like he wasnât the center of the universe for once. it was everything. the way you looked at him, like he was nothing special, like he was just another guy in a long line of guys who thought they could buy their way into your life.
âbut iâm not like them,â he whispered, his jaw tightening, for some reason, he felt as if your opinion about him mattered, as if it would validate him and differentiate him from everyone. his fingers itched as he replayed the way you shut him down, how you were so effortlessly cold, so indifferent to everything he usually took for granted. it drove him insane, but in a way that made him want more.
heeseung's thoughts were interrupted as he heard footsteps approaching. he turned, and there she was, karina, dressed in her usual sleek, effortless luxury. she was all polished skin, perfectly pressed clothes, and a kind of beauty that seemed more crafted than natural. every strand of her hair was in place, her makeup impeccable. she was the kind of girl who seemed born to be admired, the kind who could walk into a room and instantly own it with just a smile. "there you are, baby," she said, her voice smooth and warm, but with an edge of impatience. "i've been looking for you everywhere." her eyes flicked over him, a slight frown pulling at the corners of her lips, probably because she found him standing alone. she wasn't used to seeing him like that. the usual crowd of hangers-on was missing.
heeseung barely acknowledged her greeting, his mind still half on you, half on the uneasy tension you left behind. "yeah, here i am," he replied, his voice distant, distracted. karina raised an eyebrow, noticing his disinterest. âwhat's up with you? you look like you're a million miles away.â her tone was soft, but there was an undercurrent of concern, or maybe just curiosity. he wasnât acting like himself, and karina was used to having his full attention.
heeseung felt the instant need to go back to his facade, and gave her a smirk. âiâm just thinking,â he shook his head. karinaâs eyes narrowed slightly. "thinking about what?" she asked, as if she wanted to understand what had him in this strange mood he changed all of a sudden. he hesitated, looking off into the distance, towards the empty tennis courts. he didnât want to bring you up, but something in him pushed him to. "actually," he started slowly, "iâve been wondering... why do you hate that one girl, y/n, so much?"
karinaâs eyes flickered briefly, a subtle shift in her expression that heeseung didn't miss. for a moment, he saw something, just a flash, of discomfort in her gaze, he had been around enough girls to start to notice things like this. it was fleeting, but it was enough to make him pause. she straightened, regaining her composure almost immediately, but he could tell. âsheâs jealous,â he realized. not just of you, but of the fact that he was talking to her about you. about you, and not her.
karina stiffened, but only for a second. the smile on her face didnât falter. âitâs fine,â she thought, âdonât overreact. heâs just talking about her because sheâs interesting. heâs not actually...â she couldnât quite finish the thought. she didnât want to risk making a scene, not when she was so close to keeping things exactly the way they were. she needed him. she couldnât let you take him away from her. so she would do her best to portray you as someone horrible.
"i donât hate her," she replied after a beat, her voice a little too controlled. "i just donât get her."
heeseung raised an eyebrow, unimpressed by her attempt to deflect. "youâre not fooling me," he said, his tone soft but insistent. "you donât like her. why?"
karina let out a quiet sigh, her gaze shifting down, away from his eyes. she was debating whether or not to say what was really on her mind. finally, she spoke, her voice low. "she just⌠waltzes into any group, any situation, with that awful motorcycle and a hand full of drugs, and everyone loves her. no effort. she doesnât have to try. and i hate that."
heeseung frowned, confused. "what do you mean? i donât get it."
karinaâs eyes flickered with something darker now, the frustration seeping through her composed exterior. "i mean, i work for everything. i work for peopleâs approval, for their attention, for their affection. i have to try, i have to be the right kind of person, say the right things, look the right way. and then she shows up, all⌠whatever she is, and everyone just falls over themselves for that druggie. no trying. she doesnât care about any of it, and still, she gets everything." her voice grew harder, colder, as if she was speaking from experience. "itâs like she doesnât even have to try, and thatâs what pisses me off."
heeseung couldnât help but study her face, watching the jealousy simmer in her eyes. it was subtle, almost masked by her cool demeanor, but he could see it now, clear as day. karina was used to being the one people admired, the one people worked to impress. and you, someone who didnât play by any of the rules, someone who didn't care, had that same magnetic pull, without any of the effort. and it bothered her more than she wanted to admit.
karina stiffened, her lips curling slightly. "thatâs exactly the problem," she snapped. "she doesnât belong here, and she thinks that just because her father finally acknowledged her, and suddenly sheâs super rich, she can act however she pleases. but itâs not like that."
the thought made him uneasy, but he didnât show it. instead, he shrugged, his gaze drifting back to where you had disappeared. "i donât think itâs the money," he muttered, almost to himself. "i think she just is. and maybe thatâs what makes her different."
karina didnât respond. she simply stepped closer, closing the distance between them, but he could feel the slight shift in the air, the way her usual easy confidence had faltered, just a little. "whatever you say," karina finally said, forcing a smile back onto her face. "but just remember, sheâs just a low life addict, thatâs all she is, and will ever be. you donât want to get too close to someone like that."
heeseung didnât meet her eyes. instead, his gaze lingered on the spot where you had walked away, and the words from earlier replayed in his head, the ones that had stuck with him the most, âi hope you can handle it.â
later that night, heeseung found himself at sunghoonâs house, though his mind was somewhere else entirely. the mansion was alive with the thumping pulse of bass-heavy music, laughter, and the clink of bottles being passed around. it was the kind of party sunghoon always threw, lavish, high-energy, packed with people who were either too drunk to remember their names or too wealthy to care about anything else. people were dancing in the living room, some on the massive leather couches, others sprawled across the marble floors, playing some ridiculous drinking game. it was a familiar scene, people letting loose, showing off, and pretending to forget the rules for a few hours.
but none of that mattered to heeseung right now. he was standing off to the side, leaning against a wall, a drink in his hand but barely touching it. his mind kept drifting back to you, the way youâd walked off earlier, the way karinaâs words had lingered in his head. there was something about you that gnawed at him, and he couldnât shake the feeling that tonight would be the night that would reveal something important.
he didnât even know if youâd show up tonight, but he couldnât stop thinking about it. would you? would you show up, walk through the door with that effortless confidence, and completely flip the energy of the room without even trying? it wasnât even about impressing people. it was the way you didnât need to try. you just were. and it was like you could walk into any situation and make everyone elseâs chaos feel like it was secondary to you.
he tried to shake it off, pulling his phone out of his pocket to check for something. nothing. his friends were blowing up the group chat, but none of it caught his attention. it was a flurry of photos, plans to leave with a girl, someone complaining about the music being too vulgar, but nothing about you, because you werenât part of his life. maybe thatâs why he kept looking around the room, scanning the crowd, hoping, wishing that you would suddenly appear, even though he knew he was being ridiculous. you probably wouldnât even care about coming to a place like this. too many people trying to impress each other. too much pretending.
he threw back the rest of his drink on one of sunghoonâs exotic plants, setting the glass down on the nearest table, feeling his mind drift further from the party. he leaned against the wall again, the chatter and music blurring into the background, but his focus remained fixed on the front door. he kept wondering if you'd walk through it.
across the room, jake appeared, grinning wide, holding up two shot glasses. âheeseung! come on, man, stop moping in the corner and have some fun.â he raised his eyebrows, urging him over. heeseung waved him off, still distracted. âiâm good. just got a lot on my mind.â
âyeah? donât let it ruin the vibe, dude. youâre at a party, not a therapy session.â jake clapped him on the shoulder and turned away to rejoin the crowd. heeseungâs eyes flicked over to the front door again, and he felt that familiar twist in his stomach. âsheâs not coming,â he thought, but the doubt lingered. the weird hope that maybe, just maybe, she would show up. âshe doesnât belong here, and she doesnât want to belong here,â he told himself. this worldâs not your scene. but that thought only seemed to make him want to see you even more.
for a moment, he wondered why he cared so much. why was he fixated on whether youâd show up or not? it didnât make sense. he barely knew you, and yet everything about you felt like a puzzle he had to solve. and now, standing in the middle of this extravagant, noisy party, he felt that pull again, the one that made him question everything, including himself.
he glanced at the door again, half-expecting to see you walk through, but nothing. just the same crowd of people, laughing and drinking, playing their games. maybe you didnât care about these kinds of parties. maybe you didnât care about any of this at all.
heeseung pushed through the sliding glass door that led to the backyard, escaping the chaos of the party. the cool night air hit him like a splash of water, and he took a deep breath, trying to clear his head.
the backyard was quieter, but his mind was still buzzing. he was leaning against the brick wall near the pool when he spotted karina on the other side of the yard. she was laughing, leaning into some guy with slicked-back hair, a smile too perfect to be genuine. the guy was clearly into her, his hand resting a little too comfortably on her waist, but karina didnât seem to care. she was toying with him, teasing him, her eyes glancing over at heeseung for only a second, as if she was trying to make him jealous, but he wasnât bothered.
heeseung didnât care. not tonight. the sight of karina flirting with someone else didnât stir anything in him. he didnât even feel a spark of jealousy of that guy not being him. it was strange, but in the back of his mind, he kept thinking about you, about how you didnât fit into this world at all, and yet, you seemed to have more of an impact on him than anyone else in the room.
he was about to turn back to search for jake, when the sound of raised voices cut through the air. it wasnât just loud, it was intense.
he turned, his curiosity piqued, and followed the noise toward the front of the house. he didnât know what was going on, but something told him it wasnât good. as he rounded the corner, he saw the commotion, a guard-like guy, probably hired by sunghoon, was blocking the front door, holding his hand out like a wall. and there, standing just a few feet away from him, were you, fuming, your hands raised in defiance, and your expression unreadable but full of fire.
heeseungâs heart skipped a beat. he couldnât believe it. you were actually arguing with the guy, not giving a damn about the way he stood there like he owned the door.
âi canât let you in. youâre not on the list mr. park provided,â the guy was saying, his voice deep and dismissive, clearly not taking you seriously. you, however, didnât care about his rules or his attitude. "i donât care if iâm on that fuck-ass list or not, let me in," you snapped, leaning in so close your face almost brushed against his. "move out of my way before i make you."
heeseung watched, a little impressed, a little surprised at how you held your ground. you werenât backing down for anything, no one was going to push you around. the guy was trying to reason with you, but you werenât having it. before things could escalate, heeseung walked up, cutting through the tension with his calm presence. the guy looked at him with confusion, but heeseung ignored him, instead turning to you.
âhey,â he said, his voice cool but loud enough for you to hear over the noise. âitâs fine. let her in.â
you stopped, glancing up at him with a look of surprise in your eyes, like you hadnât expected him to step in. but then your face softened slightly, and he gave a quick, almost imperceptible nod, signaling to the guard that it was okay.
"i said itâs fine," heeseung continued, keeping his gaze on the guy who was still hesitating. "sheâs here with me."
the guardâs eyes flicked between you two, clearly unsure, but he finally backed off. âwhatever,â he muttered, stepping aside. âbut youâre on thin ice, lady.â
you didnât even acknowledge the guyâs words. you turned without a second glance, and motioned for your friend to follow your lead. âgigi, letâs go,â you said, the confidence in your voice as clear as day.
heeseung blinked, surprised by the sudden appearance of the girl who had been standing quietly behind you the entire time, playing with her nails. you both were dressed in tiny dresses that revealed too much, clearly ready to go somewhere else after this. giselle wasnât as loud or bold as you, but there was something in the way she carried herself with her salmon colored pin-straight hair and long nails, that suggested she was just as comfortable in her own skin. she followed you without hesitation, taking slow steps toward the door.
the two of you walked together like you didnât even notice the opulence of the house, the flashy people, or the music blaring from inside. you seemed completely indifferent to the party scene, to all of it, and heeseung couldnât help but admire it and wonder how had he not noticed you before. while everyone else was caught up in the noise, the drinking, the pretension, you and giselle were just there. not needing anything from this world. not caring about any of it. you only seemed to care about yourselves, about the quiet between you, and maybe that was the most fascinating thing about you.
heeseung was about to say something, but you didnât even look back at him. instead, you pushed your way through the crowd with your friend, making your way to the kitchen without a second thought. he followed, but kept his distance, not wanting to intrude.
you werenât here for the party. you were here for you, and he couldnât help but wonder how long he could keep watching from the sidelines before he, too, would be drawn into whatever world you existed in.
âalright,â you sighed, taking a few small plastic bags from your bra, and a cigarette box. you werenât any kind of professional underground dealer, but you were still cautious, if not, word would get to your father and it would be a mess.
âi got you, ice, itâs the powder by the way, i got molly, those pills with happy faces on them, and weed⌠oh, and we pre-rolled them for you, theyâre kind of fat, iâm really nice like that,â you smiled at heeseung, seeing him stare at you.
âyou good?â you asked, âi didnât bring anything else, i donât think youâd even know how to take it,â you stepped back, crossing your arms.
âoh, yeah, yeah, thatâs good,â he shook his head, snapping out of his trance. âcan i scan-pay you?â heeseung asked, realizing, of course, he didnât have any cash on him.
âyeah, itâs alright,â you said, pulling out your phone and typing in an amount before switching to a qr code for him to scan. for a moment, you considered scamming him, but decided against it. it wouldâve been easy, he didnât even ask about the prices.
once the payment went through, you flashed a quick, satisfied smile back to giselle. you could already feel happier knowing you would get out of this mansion. as you began to turn away, heeseungâs gaze shifted, his eyes landing on someone across the room. âhold on,â he muttered, scanning the crowd. he spotted jungwon nearby, leaning casually against the wall, chatting with a few people. heeseung grabbed the bags from the counter and stepped over to him.
âhey,â heeseung called, catching jungwonâs attention. âtake this to sunghoon, yeah?â he passed the items over, his tone nonchalant. jungwon raised an eyebrow, looking at the bags before meeting heeseungâs eyes. âman, the things you get yourself into for a girl.â
heeseung shrugged, offering a half-smile. âitâs for me. just get it to him. heâll know what to do.â
jungwon gave him a nod, slipping the bags into his jacket pocket. âgot it.â
heeseungâs eyes followed you and giselle as you made your way toward the door, his steps quickening as he caught up with you just before you reached the curb.
âhey, where are you two headed?â he asked, voice casual but with a hint of concern. you looked at him, a little surprised to see him following. âweâre going to the south,â you said, glancing at giselle. âthereâs a car race. about half an hour away, and since i had to come all the way up here for you, weâre hoping to make it to the after party.â
heeseung nodded, his gaze lingering on you. âiâll drive you,â he said, his tone suddenly firm. âwe wouldnât want you, both of you, getting into any trouble out here.â
you raised an eyebrow, skeptical, but too high to argue. you glanced at giselle, who was lighting another blunt, and let out a sigh. "fine," you said, already feeling the weight of the night catching up with you. "iâm not in the mood to call a cab and waste money." giselle shot you a look that was part judgment, part annoyance, but she kept quiet. you could feel her disapproval, but you were beyond caring at this point.
heeseung led the way, and you followed without a word. when you reached the driveway, your eyes widened slightly at the car parked there. heeseungâs car was a sleek, black sports car, the kind that turned heads without even trying. it was polished to perfection, the curves of the body glinting in the dim light of the streetlamp. it was the kind of car that screamed wealth, effortlessly.
âis this yours?â you asked, though you already knew the answer. it was the first time something he had impressed you. heeseung smirked as he opened the passenger door for you. âyeah. pretty sure itâs faster than any cab youâd get out here.â
you shook your head, sliding into the leather seat. giselle climbed in at the back, sitting with her arms crossed, clearly not impressed. she still had that cold, distant air about her when it came to heeseung and his âscrooge mcduckâ world.
heeseung didnât seem bothered. he slid into the driverâs seat, started the engine, and the low purr of the carâs power seemed to cut through the tension in the air. as he pulled out of the driveway, the smooth hum of the car filled the silence between you all.
it was an uncomfortable ride, but at least it was fast, and you werenât wasting money on a cab. you stared out the window, the city lights blurring by, while giselle stared ahead, looking as unimpressed with heeseung and his world as ever. heeseung, on the other hand, kept his eyes on the road, his expression unreadable. the drive was smooth, fast. but even as he focused on the road, his mind kept drifting back to you.
he glanced over at you, your face illuminated by the streetlights, your expression unreadable. and for a brief second, he realized that he didnât want this ride to end. he didnât want to stop being close to you, even if just for a moment.
as you got closer to the south side, the vibe of the neighborhood started to change. heeseung could feel it in the air. the buildings were older, the streets narrower, the houses less pristine than the ones he was used to. the gleaming luxury of his own world felt miles away. his fingers tightened on the steering wheel as he took in the unfamiliar surroundings, a slight unease creeping in.
you glanced over at him, sensing the shift in his energy. âyou okay?â you asked, eyes narrowing slightly as you noticed him tense up and grip the steering wheel until his knuckles turned white. heeseung didnât respond at first. he just kept driving, his gaze flicking between the rearview mirror and the unfamiliar streets. it was clear he wasnât used to this. âyeah,â he said, his voice cool but there was something off about it. âjust... not exactly my usual neighborhood.â
you gave him a knowing look, the faintest smirk tugging at the corner of your lips. âdonât worry,â you said, your voice light but with an edge of seriousness. âiâll protect you, whatever happens pretty boy.â
heeseung shot you a glance, eyes flicking over to meet yours, before rolling his eyes. âi donât need protection, thanks,â he muttered, but there was an almost imperceptible tension in his jaw that gave him away.
you could tell he was uncomfortable, and it wasnât just the drive. his world and this one were different in every way, and he was out of his element, but you didnât say anything. it was clear enough without needing to spell it out. heeseung took a turn down an alleyway, the pavement rough and uneven. he parked the car next to a few other vehicles, feeling the weight of the decision. the streetlights here werenât as bright, and there was a certain stillness in the air that felt too quiet for comfort. his mind flashed briefly to the idea of getting robbed, but he pushed the thought away, shaking his head.
âdonât take it personally,â you said, reading his discomfort easily. you and giselle climbed out of the car, both of you moving with purpose. âcome on,â you said, glancing back at him. âthe after partyâs just down the street.â
heeseung hesitated, but finally stepped out of the car. the low hum of the engine idled in the background, the sound of the city slowly creeping in around him. he walked behind you and giselle, trying not to seem too out of place as you led the way out the alley.
the party was just around the corner, and the closer you got, the louder the music became. from a distance, it looked like any other chaotic house party, but heeseung could sense the difference. the people were rougher, the energy sharper. it felt like a different world, one he had no real experience in. you shot him a glance over your shoulder as you reached the front door. âyouâre fine,â you said, almost as if you were trying to reassure him, though you both knew there was no guarantee of that. you gave him a small smirk before pushing open the door.
heeseung paused at the threshold, looking around. this was a place where he didnât belong, a world where people didnât care about money or status. it was raw, unpredictable, and everything in him wanted to retreat, but something kept him standing there. you had pulled him into this world, whether he liked it or not. heeseung followed you and giselle into the backyard, where the atmosphere felt more relaxed, but still lively. the yard was filled with groups of people gathered around, casually chatting and laughing. the air was thicker here, filled with the mix of cigarette smoke and the low hum of music coming from the house.
heeseung couldnât help but feel out of place as his gaze landed on two guys, who were lounging on a bench, laughing with a couple of girls. their casual demeanor was in sharp contrast to the tightly wound posture heâd been carrying since arriving. they noticed him immediately, their eyes flicking to him, then back to you and giselle. noting he was one of âyours.â
âgirls, you bailed on us tonight,â keeho pouted.
âwe told you we were going to sell at one of y/n new classmates party. your little suicide car race isnât that important,â giselle rolled her eyes kicking keehoâs shin with her heel, making him hiss.
yeonjun raised an eyebrow and smirked at heeseung, who was still tense, and looked like a mannequin from a golf store. âyo, man, you look like youâre about to shit yourself already. whatâs with the stiff face?â he asked, clearly amused by heeseungâs discomfort. keeho chuckled, looking at him with a knowing smile.
âyouâre here with her, though,â keeho added, tilting his head in your direction. âso, youâre alright, huh? wasnât expecting to see you here, rich kid.â
you laughed at his comment, taking giselleâs blunt and taking a drag out of it.
heeseung wasnât sure how to respond. he wasnât sure why he felt so out of place. it wasnât like he had anything against the people here. still, he couldnât shake the tension in his shoulders. âyeah, just not... used to this,â he muttered, glancing around at the unfamiliar scene.
you caught his eye, noticing the tension that still hadnât fully left him. with a small grin, you spoke up, your tone light but firm. âdonât sweat it. i said iâd protect you didnât i? youâre fine. just enjoy the night.â
yeonjun laughed and leaned back, gesturing to the people around him. âweâre broâs, right? just have a good time. youâre with us now,â he said, his smile more welcoming than teasing.
you and heeseung exchanged a quick look, something unspoken passing between you before you broke the silence with a small smile. âwant a drink?â you asked, your tone casual but with an undercurrent of something more, like you were offering him a way to settle in, just a little. heeseung hesitated, glancing around at the people milling about, some laughing, some lost in their own world. he still wasnât quite comfortable, still felt like an outsider, but the offer was simple enough. he nodded slowly. âyeah. sure.â
you led the way over to a small table where drinks were being passed around, beer cans, a few bottles of cheap liquor, and what looked like a mix of makeshift cocktails. the scene felt different than the polished, curated parties he was used to. you grabbed a bottle of something brown and poured it into a plastic cup, handing it to him. âyouâre unlucky, i donât have any fancy cocktails,â you said with a half-smirk, leaning back slightly as he took the drink.
âthanks,â he muttered, eyeing the cup with a little wariness before taking a careful sip. it was strong. way stronger than he expected, and he quickly forced himself to swallow, trying not to show that it burned. heeseung took another drink, feeling the warmth spread through his chest as the alcohol hit him. the tension in his body started to loosen, but his mind kept swirling around the question that had been nagging him ever since you first crossed his path.
âwhy are you staying with me?â he asked, his voice quieter than usual, a little more curious as you two settled down on two plastic chairs. âwhy not go back to your friends? seems like youâd rather be with them.â he watched you for a second as you absentmindedly looked around. for a moment, you didnât answer, but then you met his gaze, your eyes soft and a little more open than usual, like you were letting him see something deeper.
âbecause i knew you wouldnât feel comfortable by yourself,â you said casually, but there was something in your tone, something almost kind, that caught him off guard. you shrugged like it wasnât a big deal, but he could tell it was, at least to you. heeseung blinked, surprised. he hadnât expected that kind of answer. it wasnât what heâd imagined, especially with how standoffish you'd seemed earlier. you werenât trying to be here out of obligation, or to entertain some rich kid from the party.
and then, as the silence stretched on for a second, he noticed something in your manner. something that shifted, just a little. your body language had relaxed, your words were slower, more open. heeseung's gaze narrowed, and he took a longer look at you. âwait a minute,â he said, voice a little more cautious. âyouâre high, arenât you?â he laughed.
âyeah, iâve been for the last ten minutes,â you admitted with a small laugh, your words softening at the edges. âitâs just the same thing i gave you, though. donât get all worried on me.â
âso youâre... this you?â he asked, motioning vaguely to the two of you, to the situation, to everything happening around you. ânot the one back at the school?â
you shrugged again, but this time it was more relaxed. âyeah, i guess so,â you said, eyes flickering away for a second, like you were deciding whether to share more or pull back. but then, you met his gaze again, almost like you were daring him to say something about it. âi thought iâve always been me, but now that you mention it. i guess i kind of act with some sort of resentment to you guys,â
he took another drink, then looked at you, his voice softer this time. âwhyâs that?â
âhard feeling,â you said simply. âfamily things, but itâs all handled.â you lied, not wanting to open up to him completely yet. there was definitely a change in him, and you noticed it. and in his eyes you could see the slight desperation and need. it was his new demeanour that made him different. you couldn't explain, because words couldn't even clarify what was starting to lure you in.
âheeseung, seriously, iâm opening up to you, and you keep looking at me like you want to fuck,â you said out of nowhere. he instantly tensed up and looked away.
âiâm sorry, i didnât realize,â he said. it was obvious he didnât want you to think of him as a player anymore, he was actually trying to please you now. you let out a soft, teasing laugh, leaning back in your chair, knowing exactly what you were doing. you decided to play into his usual game just enough to give him a bit of satisfaction. "do you?"
heeseung immediately turned toward you, eyes widening in surprise as he caught the playful glint in yours. he knew exactly what you were hinting at, but he still tried to keep his cool, pretending to be unfazed. "huh?"
"do you⌠want to fuck?" you asked casually, watching him with a challenge in your eyes.
his breath caught for a split second, but he quickly composed himself. he opened his mouth, unsure of how to answer, and hesitated. "i⌠donât know," he muttered, trying to play it safe, though his voice betrayed a slight crack of uncertainty. you couldnât help but laugh softly, your head tilting back as you let out a short snort. you met his eyes again, smirking. "what do you mean you donât know? is it really that hard to say what you want?"
heeseung shifted uncomfortably, clearly trying to play it cool, but the nervousness was obvious. and it was so very clear that he wanted it. he ran a hand through his hair, his gaze flickering away for a moment. "what even is your point y/n?"
you shrugged nonchalantly, your tone lighter now. "nothing, just asking."
after that night, things were different. heeseung wasn't the same. he wasn't playing games anymore, not the way he used to. it wasnât like heâd suddenly become someone else, but around you, he changed. that distance he always kept, it started to shrink.
you could feel it in the way he acted, the way heâd look at you sometimes when you were talking in class or lunch with your friend, like he was listening for real and not just pretending. he was less guarded, more real with you.
you started meeting up behind the gym often. no one ever really saw you, and thatâs how you both liked it. the air was always a little warmer there, the kind of quiet where you could actually talk. youâd smoke, and heâd sit with you, talking about everything and nothing at all. and even when the conversation would die down, there was this comfortable silence between you two. the kind that felt easy, like you didnât have to fill every gap with words.
one day, he even just showed up at your door, standing there with his dad, holding a gift basket. you froze when you opened the door. heeseung, here, with his dad, visiting your dad. it was almost laughable. you never thought youâd see the day, but there he was, a little nervous, but still trying to act cool.
"uh, hey," he said, like it wasnât the most awkward thing ever. "my dad was going to visit your dad... said something about business visits or whatever, so i came with him."
you blinked, still processing, then stepped aside to let them in. after that, you both started to realize how much closer youâd gotten. things werenât just about secret meetings anymore. they were about knowing each other, understanding each other in a way you didnât before.
heeseung wasnât a player anymore, not around you. he wasnât hiding behind any walls or pretending to be something he wasnât. it was like he was finally letting himself be seen, and you liked that. a lot.
even with all the changes, even with how much closer you two had become, there was still that one thing hanging between you. heeseung was still with karina. it wasnât like you didnât notice it. the way they would still walk around school together, the way sheâd smile at him when he passed by. there were no obvious signs of trouble, no cracks in their relationship that you could see.
even though heeseung would drop little hints, those quiet, uncertain words when the two of you were alone âiâm thinking about breaking up with herâŚâ it never seemed to go anywhere. he would say it with a kind of vulnerability, like he was testing the waters, like he was hoping youâd say something that would push him in one direction or the other.
you couldnât help but feel frustrated. there was this constant tug-of-war between what he said to you in private and what he did when the world was watching. it felt like he was trying to keep one foot in both worlds, but you couldnât help feeling like you were left waiting in the middle, unsure if you were just a momentary distraction or something more. you told yourself you shouldnât read too much into it. that he was confused, that maybe it wasnât the right time, or maybe he didnât have the courage to make the change. but every time heâd tell you he wanted to leave her, youâd see the conflict in his eyes, that quiet desperation to be understood, to be seen. still, he never followed through. he never made the choice.
you stayed friendly, maybe out of habit, maybe because you werenât quite ready to let go of the connection youâd built. you let him tag along when you hung out with your friends down south at the house. a spot that was more a sanctuary than anything else, away from the world, away from expectations.
heeseung still had that rich boy aura about him, the one that made him stick out in a crowd of worn-out jeans and streetwise attitudes. but your friends didnât mind. they were good with him being there, even if they teased him a little. mocking his clean-cut appearance, joking about how his designer clothes didnât exactly fit the vibe. they liked him well enough, though. it was obvious he wasnât as comfortable with them as he was in his own circles, but he did try. and they did notice how close youâd gotten to him.
âlook at mr. fancy pants over here,â yeonjun would joke, nudging him as he sipped on whatever drink was put in front of him. âyou sure youâre not lost, rich boy? this isnât exactly sushi bar territory.â
heâd smile, a little awkwardly, trying to laugh it off, but there was always a flicker of discomfort behind his eyes. he wasnât like them, not really. they knew it, and he knew it, but it didnât matter as much when he was there, surrounded by your friends, just being with you.
youâd catch moments, though. quiet ones when he was staring off into the distance, or when his laugh felt a little too forced. you knew it was because he was still stuck. still torn between two worlds, two lives. and you were tired of being in the middle of it. though, what ou didnât know, that for him it was much more than that. he was stuck between two girls of different worlds. karina and you.
karina wasnât someone he actually liked, he was just with her for his reputation and his family. but still, he was with her. and you, you were absolutely everything to him. you were the trouble that came along with bad decisions and the reward that came after them.
it all came crashing down one night when you and your friends were hanging out at the house, like youâd done countless times before. the air was thick with smoke, the sounds of laughter and music filling the dim-lit space as everyone just tried to forget for a few hours. it was supposed to be like any other night, a break from everything that weighed you down. but then, out of nowhere, the door slammed open.
sirens wailed in the distance, but it was already too late. the police stormed in, uniformed and angry, their boots pounding against the cracked floors, their voices demanding silence. they didnât give anyone a chance to react before they were ripping through everything. throwing aside old records, scattering things off shelves, knocking over bottles.
"this is a raid," one of the officers barked, his voice cutting through the chaos. "everythingâs getting confiscated."
your heart sank as they swept through the room, destroying everything. things you had no idea theyâd even care about. all the memories, the things that had made this place feel like home, were being taken apart right in front of you. your childhood, your sanctuary, was crumbling.
you stood frozen for a second, not sure what to do, but your instinct kicked in. no way in hell. this wasnât right. you couldnât let them destroy it all. you rushed forward, intent on stopping them, shouting at the officers to stop, to leave, to just go away.
"who the hell do you think you guys are?! this is my house! you canât do this!" you screamed, your hands shaking with adrenaline as you tried to push past one of the officers to get to the old furniture, the things that meant something to you. everything in this house had a story, a memory. and they were tearing it down, trying to find something.
but before you could get too far, a hand grabbed your arm, pulling you back. it was heeseung, his grip firm but gentle as he yanked you away from the officers.
âstop,â he muttered urgently, his voice tense. "youâre not gonna win this. theyâll arrest you, theyâll make it worse." even if he was slightly scared, and terrified of getting himself arrested and the word getting to his father, he had to take care of you. he just wondered how they found out about this place, a drug raid was almost impossible, you were within the legal bounds.
you were almost angry at heeseung for not letting you go. in that moment, as the officers trashed everything that meant something to you, the anger bubbled up inside. how could he stand there, calm and collected, trying to hold you back, when everything you cared about was being destroyed? it felt like betrayal, even though you knew deep down it wasnât his fault. he wasnât the one doing this.
you tried to pull away from him, your heart racing, your mind spinning. "let me go, heeseung!" you snapped, your voice sharp and furious. " i canât just stand here and watch them do this! theyâre destroying everything!"
but he held you tighter, his grip unyielding. âiâm not letting you make things worse. not like this,â he said, his voice tight but calm, like he knew exactly what you needed, even if you didnât want to hear it.
you yanked your arm again, almost reckless with frustration. your pulse was pounding in your ears. âwhy? why are you stopping me? i canât just let them-â you broke off, your voice cracking. you didnât want to admit how scared you were, how helpless you felt. in that moment, you realized, there wasnât anybody there for you. the house of your mother was being searched, and she wasnât here. and you knew youâre father wouldnât care.
his eyes softened, and for a moment, you thought he might let go. but instead, he pulled you closer, his voice dropping to something gentler, but firm. âbecause if you go after them now, youâre just giving them more reason to hurt you. to make it worse. this isnât the time.â
you hated that he was right. you absolutely hated it.
it wasnât just about the stuff. it wasnât just about the house. it was the fact that it all felt like a reminder of how much you didnât have control over. the way things kept slipping through your fingers, no matter how hard you tried to hold on. you looked up at him, your chest rising and falling in sharp breaths. âthey canât just take everything,â you muttered, the anger still hot in your throat. âthis was my life. my memories. this house is all i am.â
heeseung didnât say anything right away. he just looked at you. like he really understood. he got it, even if you werenât sure you could let him. finally, he exhaled slowly. "i know. but this isnât the way to fix it."
you stood there, your body still tense, but slowly, you started to feel the reality of the situation hit you. he wasnât letting you be reckless because he didnât care. he was trying to protect you from making a bigger mistake, from getting hurt. from losing more. with a heavy sigh, you slumped against him, the fight draining from your body. you werenât sure if you were more angry at the situation or at yourself for feeling so helpless. but in that moment, as the chaos continued around you, all you could do was lean into him. just a little, because you knew you couldnât do this alone.
after the chaos of the raid, everything seemed to move in slow motion. the police had confiscated everything they wanted that seemed suspicious, leaving nothing but a wrecked space behind. theyâd taken their time, ensuring that no one was left with any trace of what used to be there. when it was over, the officers had turned their attention to you, with blaming guns in hand.
you hadnât even realized they were going to search you until they were doing it, their hands cold and impersonal as they patrolled your pockets, your bag, your shoes. your heart hammered in your chest, and you were still shaking from the adrenaline, from everything that had just happened. everything felt surreal, like you were watching it happen to someone else. but the reality of it hit hard when they finally let you out of the interrogation room, their eyes on you like you were some kind of suspect.
you stood outside the police station, the weight of everything pressing down on you. the air felt colder now, the harshness of the situation settling in. you were free to go, but the damage had been done. you felt exposed, like a part of you had been torn away that you couldnât get back. but you couldnât stay there anymore. the night had stretched on, and you just needed to leave.
as you stood there, trying to process the mess that had been made of your life, you heard someone approaching from behind. you didnât need to turn around to know who it was. his footsteps, the way he moved, the tension in his gait, it was heeseung.
he walked up to you, his face serious, eyes darker than usual. "are you okay?" he asked, though you could tell he wasnât asking just out of concern. he was searching for something else, something deeper. you didnât answer right away. you couldnât. instead, you just gave a tight nod, your throat too tight to speak. but then he said something that made your stomach drop.
âit was karina,â he said.
you blinked, confused. âwhat do you mean?â
heeseung exhaled sharply, shaking his head slightly, like he couldnât believe it. "sheâs the one who called the cops. i know it. she slipped up when i talked to her a couple of minutes ago, she somehow knew i was here.â
a cold feeling swept over you as everything clicked into place. karina. karina had followed him all the way to the house, had gotten the cops involved. it made sense, but the realization didnât make it hurt any less.
âshe did this?â you asked quietly, your voice hollow. you didnât need to say much more. it was all there. you didnât actually believe it was possible for someone to be such a horrible human being. heeseung didnât respond immediately. his jaw clenched, and you could see how much it was bothering him. how much it hurt him to admit it, but he couldnât deny it.
"yeah," he muttered, his voice low. "i didnât want to believe it at first, but... itâs clear now." he looked at you, his expression almost guilty, like he was carrying something heavy. "i never wanted you to be caught up in that. i never thought sheâd go this far. i broke up with her, she kept bothering me about being here."
you turned away, looking out into the night, the cool air stinging your face. "so what now?" you asked, the words coming out flat, tired. heeseung stepped closer, his voice more earnest now, as if he wanted to say something, to fix things. "i donât know," he admitted quietly. "i never wanted it to be like this. i donât want to lose you... but i donât know how to fix this either. i donât want to hurt you."
you glanced at him, feeling the weight of the moment. part of you wanted to scream, to say everything that was building up inside, but another part of you just felt... defeated. because the truth was, even now, with everything that had happened, you still didnât have an answer. and maybe that was the problem. you could feel it. the tension that had been there for so long. the feelings that you couldnât fully express, that he couldnât seem to acknowledge. and here you were, caught in the middle of it all.
âyouâve already hurt me, heeseung,â you whispered, your voice barely audible. âbut i guess... i guess iâve been letting you. because i still donât know how to walk away.â
heeseungâs expression faltered. "i never wanted you to feel that way."
you shook your head. âyou donât get it, do you? itâs not about what you want anymore. itâs about whatâs already happened.â
he didnât have a response. all he could do was stand there, looking at you like he wanted to fix things, but knowing he couldnât. because when it came down to it, the choice had never been yours. and it sure as hell wasnât his to make anymore.
for the next few days, you avoided heeseung like the plague. and he couldnât get close to you. everytime he tried, something got in the way, his friends, responsibilities. and you were fine with that. you just had to accept that everything that happened with him was just a slip up, and youâd soon be in your usual bad girl exterior, ignoring him one again.
but it wasnât that easy. not with karina still out to make your life impossible. she was still angry at you for whatever reason. angry enough to confront you again.
âhow are you doing, y/n?â karina pulled out a chair in your empty lunch table, sitting down neatly on it.
âwhat the fuck do you want?â you spat, annoyed by her presence. you could already feel the stares of students and teachers, as they were informed of what happened.
âgeez, calm down, we wouldnât want you to get a violence complaint and get sent back to the police station, wouldnât we?â
that was all she needed to say, the single words that came out of her mouth. and she was face down on the ground. you pressed your knee on her back, keeping her grounded, as your hand made her face keep contact with the dirty floor. âyou keep fucking messing with me karina, i told you i wouldnât let it go.â
from a table not to far away, heeseung sat with his friends, watching the scene intently, and for once, heeseung felt himself worrying about a girl. not karina, but you. for once he felt the need to protect you, even if you were already capable on your own.
a small drop of blood from her perfect skin was enough to make you land yourself in the principalâs office. after the fight in the cafeteria, everything changed. you were suspended for your actions, the consequences of that impulsive moment catching up with you. karina had pushed you too far, it was messy. it was ugly. and now, it was your reality.
you spent the next week alone, mostly, apart from that day your father made you attend rehab, because for some reason the school requested it, there you met some nice people. the suspension meant missing school, being grounded and missing your friends down south who kept spamming your phone, and also being forced to face the aftermath of everything. it was a strange kind of isolation. you hadnât expected to feel so disconnected. the chaos of the fight, the anger youâd been holding back for so long. it all felt like it had burned itself out in that one violent moment. and now, there was just the quiet, with nothing left to do but think.
one afternoon, as you sat on your huge balcony, smoking a cigarette, since your father confiscated everything else, you tried to let the smoke clear your head. you watched the world outside, the fancy cars in traffic passing below, people going about their business, and it felt almost surreal. like everything that had happened. the raid, the fight, was part of some other version of your life. but you couldnât forget. you couldnât ignore the tension in your chest. the weight of everything youâd lost. even if you didnât want to admit it, even if you didnât want to feel it, you still missed him. you missed the parts of him that were real. the ones that made you feel like maybe, just maybe, things could be different. but now, with everything laid bare, you realized it was never going to be the way you wanted.
you sighed and flicked the cigarette to the ground, watching it burn out as you leaned back against the railing. it was quiet here, just you and the world. it gave you space to breathe, to think. but still, your mind kept returning to heeseung. to the way heâd looked at you in the hallways before everything went south. to the way he used to make you feel seen. and even though you were angry at him, you still couldnât shake the thought âmaybe i miss him more than i should.â
you were lost in thought when the doorbell rang, snapping you out of your haze. no one ever came to your house except your dad, so the sound was unexpected. you walked to the top of the stairs to see who it was, but when you saw the butler let heeseung inside, your stomach dropped. what the hell was he doing here? after everything, after you cut him off. he still showed up. frustration hit you immediately, and you turned to leave, heading quickly to your room. but heeseung wasnât giving up that easily. you heard his footsteps behind you as he called your name. "hey, wait!"
you didnât stop. you just pushed harder to get to your door, slamming it behind you and locking it. but you knew he was still out there, still following you.
âplease, can we talk?â he said softly through the door. you stood there, fists clenched, torn between wanting to scream and wanting to know why he couldnât just leave you alone.
you hesitated for a moment, but you couldnât bring yourself to leave him standing there. you unlocked the door and let him in, and he stepped inside, his gaze immediately scanning your room. it was quiet, almost sterile. nothing like the space you had shown him at your old place. there were no personal touches, no signs of the messy, chaotic you heâd seen before. it felt different. distant.
heeseung looked around, his eyes softening with something like regret, but before he could say anything, you snapped.
âyou have no right to come back into my life like this, like you own the place!â you shouted, your voice shaking with anger. âafter everything, after you- ugh! you canât just show up here, acting like itâs nothing!â
he took a step back, clearly taken off guard by the intensity of your words. but you didnât care. the frustration, the hurt. it all spilled out in a rush. âyou didnât fight for shit, heeseung! you never did. you just kept going back to karina and that made her destroy my life! so donât come here now, thinking everythingâs fine!â
his face tightened, but he didnât speak. he just stood there, looking at you, trying to find the right words. but you couldnât let him speak. not yet.
âyou donât get to do this,â you spat, your chest heaving. âyou donât get to just fix it after everything youâve done.â
heeseung didn't say anything. he just stepped forward and pulled you into a kiss-fast, intense. you froze, feeling all the anger and frustration you'd built up dissolve in that moment. it wasn't gentle, it wasn't soft. it was his apology, his regret, all packed into one. you tried to push him away to keep talking, but he didn't let you. instead, his hand gripped your wrist, pushing you against the wall, and it made everything inside you twist. when he pulled back, his breath was heavy, eyes searching yours.
âi will cuss you out heeseung, for everything, maybe not just now,â you breathed out, making a small grin appear on his face.
his hands gently traced the contours of your figure as his gaze remained focused on you. he was tender, careful, his lips leaving soft, lingering touches, wanting you to remember only the feel of his kiss. "i've missed you so fucking much, you donât even knowâŚ" he murmured, his thumb grazing your jaw. "me too," you replied softly, pressing your lips against his again.
his hands quickly went to the hem of your shirt, his experienced fingers peeling it shirt off your warm body, a small sigh leaving his lips as they trailed against your neck, leaving open mouthed kisses along it. your breathing got heavier as he sucked hard occasionally, very clearly trying to leave marks.
âfuck, slow down, iâm not going anywhere,â you let out a small breathy gasp, feeling his sharp teeth numbing on your skin, then his soft lips pressing against the spot, almost delicately. you moaned lightly as heeseung slid his knee between your thighs, feeling him smirk against your sensitive skin. âyeah, i know.â
heeseung then moved you both to the edge of your bed, gently letting you rest on your back, your head landing softly against the pillows, still very much aware of how much you needed his mouth back on your body.
he resumed to trailing kisses down your chest, through every single line of dark ink on your body, until he reached the hem of your shorts, looking up at you with those dark doe eyes, that drowned in need. âjust relax, can you do that for me?â heeseung slowly started to take off your bottoms, as you sighed out âuh-huh.â he pulled them down your legs, throwing them away from your sight.
âjust like that,â he slipped his hand through your white laced underwear causing you to shudder. as his soft fingertips brushed against your cunt. your chest immediately tensed feeling his index and middle finger rub down your clit, your wetness coating his fingers.
heeseung captured your lips into a hungry kiss, distracting you for a small second as he pushed two fingers deep inside of you, reaching up. but soon enough, he had you gasping for air against his mouth, as he moved them quicker, his thumb pressing against your clit, sending a warm feeling through your body.
your hand gripped the soft silk sheets, the other on his shoulder, feeling him so deep inside. your hips buckled unconsciously, wanting to get even closer to him. âfuck,â you whispered, dryly moaning, getting the overwhelming sense of cumming start building up.
heeseung kissed the corner of your mouth one time, before going down on you, his hot tongue leaving a wet trail against your skin, and then he replaced his thumb, sucking on your swollen clit, while his fingers still worked their way into you. his eyes observed how you reacted, almost as if hunting you down. it all felt too much, many sensations at the same time, they had you struggling with your words in between moans, as the knot inside your stomach tightened but quickly gave up, âfuck, âseung- mhmm, iâm gonna-â you whimpered, feeling your legs start shaking, making heeseung go impossibly harder on you.
he fingered and sucked you until you came down your high, making sure to lick his fingers clean, not wanting to get your bed dirty, even if it would in a few seconds. you could feel him getting more hard, as he pressed his hips down against your plush thigh to get a bit of friction. a smirk spread across your mouth because you knew you were the reason why.
âcome on, let me see your face, pretty girl,â he grabbed you with his other hand, turning your hot face towards him, almost grinning in victory when seeing your half lidded pinkish eyes, as if you were drunk from arousal and his touch. he bored into your face, as if looking at a piece of art, âyouâre goddamn beautiful,â he uttered.
âyeah, i know,â you told him, making him laugh, while using your hands to unbutton his pants, starting to slide them off. heeseung noticed this, looking down at your actions then back up at you with a smirk, âand youâre telling me to slow down,â he said with a devilish tone, helping you take off his clothes, ever so slowly, torturing you with the time.
you threw him a warning look, as he propped up, still on top of you, and took off his shirt as well, letting you see his slightly tanned skin, clear of any love bites that soon would coat him. heeseung hovered over your body, watching intently how he deeply buried himself inside of you. he wouldnât let you do any of the work, it was going to be him.
you felt him pulsate inside of you, your walls stretching out for him due to his size. it was almost painful to feel too full at once. heeseung was trying not to go crazy over how warm and tight your were, suppressing the need to fuck you with everything he had here and now, before starting to move slowly. he went as deep as he could, and once you got used to the feeling of his dick inside you, heeseung started thrusting in roughly, enough to send spams through your heat, to your body.
âfuck, youâre so good for me,â heeseung groaned, and he took advantage of your position under him to make particularly strong thursts, tightening his grip on your waist, his expression full with desire for more, to get lost in you. and your face didnât make it better, you looked so needy and high from him at the same time, it made him want to fuck you endlessly, and lose control.
his hips kept slamming with yours mercilessly, and you felt yourself aching, wanting to cum once again, letting out a loud inevitable moan. heeseung was pressed by your walls, as he approached his edge soon, taking the moment to pound into you quickly, almost making himself a whining mess.
you whimpered into his mouth due to the overstimulation he caused you with his thrusts, a knot ran through your legs and you didn't know how much longer you could resist, you felt unbelievably full from him. your warm breath made him lose even more concentration, as he mindlessly came inside of you, coating your insides, still throbbing and moving slowly into you.
when he finally stopped and cleaned you up carefully, heeseung dropped next to you, turning to watch your profile. he raised his fist, getting your attention, and you gave him an odd look before joining your own first with him in the middle in a fistbump, even if you felt like you were about to give away into sleepiness. âatleast thatâs better than making stuff awkward,â you sighed, looking up at the ceiling, only dressed in your shirt and a new pair of underwear, feeling a small tug in your throat from being dry.
âhey, we need to get up, i was planning on taking you out,â heeseung said, poking your arm playfully. he couldnât be serious, wanting you to leave the comfort of your bed after not being able to feel how to walk.
turning your body to your side, you looked out of the glass panel that was your window, noticing the sky get darker âyouâre crazy, iâm not doing that right now, let me be,â the words left your mouth tiredly, groaning as you adjusted your position.
heeseung shook his head, hearing a small breath from you, telling him you were in already dream-land, way too far for him to get ahold of you. and he was sure it would always be like that, that he would be the one chasing you, and he didnât mind, because after all the bad decisions, he was knew he could handle it, the bad reputation and everything that came in between.
BTW: this is saur embarrassing, if it doesnât get atleast one note, i will delete my whole account istg. đ¤Łđ¤Łđ¤Łđ¤Łđ¤Ł also, not proofread. iâm not reading all that stuff again. ew.
EXTRA:
masterlist.
#EUGHHHHHH#what if i disappeared after this đ°#CORNY AHH END đđ¤Ł#heeseung x reader#lee heeseung x you#heeseung#enha scenarios#lee heesung x reader#lee heeseung x y/n#heeseung enha#lee heeseung#enhypen x female reader#enhypen x y/n#enha imagines#enhypen x you#enhypen x reader#enha x reader#enha hard hours#enha hard thoughts#enhypen#enha smut
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Well I'm sorry you feel that way but this is the impression the story of MHA gave me in it's final arc. Not through ignoring themes or events, but through scrutinizing them thoroughly.
To start off with All Might's independence, you say he normally worked solo and the big operation for the last day of his work isn't indicative of the other 40 years; but the thing is, working solo is actually normal for most heroes (unless they're on a team of heroes like the WWPC). See Kamui Woods & Mt. Lady competing over handling the purse snatcher from chapter 1 as an example of normal hero operation. They only really work together with non-sidekicks for big operations, and even non-League-based operations like the Overhaul raid can pull top heroes like Ryukyu & Fatgum. And when the Kamino raid is the only real big operation we see during All Might's tenure at all (unless you count the USJ rescue, which also played out just like Deku's experience in the final arc), I don't see a reason to assume it was atypical of All Might.
The reason society felt to nearly fall apart with All Might's retirement wasn't because he worked solo all the time; it was because he was so many miles better than the next best guy that he became the basis for the heroes reputation; so his departure sowed doubt in their credibility.
~
As for Deku getting non-hero help; the help from civilians amounted to first aid kits & shirts and stuff. Things civilians were largely already willing to part with to help heroes even before society collapsed; see the old lady insisting Bakugou take some food right before Shigaraki woke up in Jaku. This is really not the radical change it's presented as. Past that, they just stayed on the sidelines waiting for the fight to be over and then helped clean up, same as ever with the last Symbol.
And as for the villains who helped him; well one was already a former hero, 2 others were a minor offenders asked to help catch much worse criminals, which is pretty standard law enforcement behaviour, and Stain. That's just 4 villains helping; 4 total people helping the heroes in ways not expected of them. And there's no big sign that greater society noticed their contribution anyway; Stain in particular felt forgotten after he died.
(Also, it was a whole plot point no help arrived from elsewhere in the world at all for the final battle. Least of all in a way that affect's public perception.)
So my problem persists that I don't understand why this battle against/beatdown of the big bad villain is supposed to be so different & special from the perspective of the masses.
~
Next, as for Deku trying to find a non-lethal resolution, well I guess it might depend on your definition of "lethal" but:
The evidence does suggest Deku wanted to "break them both"; that he was intending for Tomura to wind up in the same state AFO was in at the time, and he certainly wasn't looking to save that guy.
And as for the being obvious to everyone who witnessed it...how do you figure that? Deku barely had any dialogue spoken aloud to Shigaraki to begin with in the final fight, and most of that was for the portion when he was on his own and no one else could hear him. It's not like his actions could speak for him either, he was just throwing punches the whole time. Counting only after everyone arrived, he basically just recounted what happened to Aizawa, got his arms healed, and started charging AFO to deliver a one-hit-kill-punch while everyone told him to do his best because he's the only one who can deliver a meaningful hit. It's been a while since I reread the whole arc, but I don't remember Deku ever telling anyone he intended to save Tomura anyway besides the vestiges & All Might, and he only talked about it for us to see with the latter after Tomura died.
What part of that series of events makes you think anyone but Deku & AM was in on any intention of saving Shigaraki? When did anyone else treat Shigaraki as anything but a villain that needed beating? Why would that be a wake up call to society instead of just the 4th and final defeat of AFO?
~
And lastly; as for the lethal option being unavoidable. Well maybe it was for Deku, but we know it wasn't impossible to save Tomura at all (similar to how Touya could have been saved, but Enji never could have saved him); because Spinner managed it. And enough of Tomura's spirit was still around that we can safely say a repeat should have been possible. So that Deku failed to save someone we know was save-able; hell, that he failed to save someone he vowed to save at all (and do not try to tell me he saved his heart based on a 2-panel speech on hand-holding), undercuts the storytelling now matter how you slice it.
Deku failed to save Tomura and complete the objective he set for the final 3rd of the series, failed to do anything truly different from All Might before him...and everything just turns out way better anyway. There's no way around this feeling is contrived and unearned.
I think the thing that ultimately gets me about how Deku has supposedly inspired away everything that'd lead to more Tenkos turning into Tomuras is...just "why?" Like, why did this:
Happen differently this time? I mean that's a fair question to ask, isn't it? The Walk was effectively the true inciting incident for Tomura, leader of the League, to hate hero society; you'd want a really solid answer as to why that won't happen again I would think.
The narration from Hawks and accompanying imagery implies it's because Deku inspired folks to not sit on the sidelines anymore, further implied to be a Hero Society-wide effect Deku has had that'll supposedly eliminate the bystander effect that led us here and give heroes more free time.
But like...Why is that different from what we've seen of heroes before now? All Might was around for 40 years and Deku, in the end, didn't really do anything AM didn't do; he punched out the big bad for the world to see. And All Might did also inspire people like the origin trio to action...by becoming heroes. Yet civilians like the old lady were inspired to go about her day because a hero would handle it, while Deku inspired her to reach out a hand herself. Why?
I've heard some suggest it's because Deku was less independent, had more of a teamwork focus in his big moment. But Iâve said this before, I think those people assume All Might was a lot more independent than he really was, and Deku a lot less. I mean a lot of Deku's fight was broadcast, including big portions where he was fighting the big bad solo just like All Might in Kamino. And then both fights ended with more heroes coming in to lend support.
So I'm just not seeing why public effect is so radically different.
And it's just that, I have been waiting to see what would prevent more Tomuras from crawling out of the woodworks to destroy even more since MVA; what measures would be taken to prevent that? Perhaps Tomura would destroy hero society, not just its buildings but its corrupt ideals, leadership, & figureheads; and maybe when he was beaten there would be room to rebuild it better from scratch? No, he didn't really destroy much at all actually, and things are being rebuilt just as they were. Would Deku and Tomura perhaps team up going forward after he's saved; with the latter's eyes for what's wrong in the world and the former's ability to fix it without violence? No, Deku kills Tomura because he was just too unforgivable, it's implied he was just after a tasteful way to do that the whole fight. Well, would Deku at least listen to what drove Tomura to villainy and do something about any of that? Nope, if it wasn't his final words to Spinner or their talk about hand holding, it was in one ear and out the other for Deku; and there's no sign he's told many people what little he did learn.
So what saves the Teknos of the world? Well Deku kills the big bad on live TV and it's really inspiring. Why is that different from the past 40 years? ...Horikoshi is to burnt out to answer. That's the ultimate answer to the question I've been asking for nearly 200 chapters.
Well I guess I always knew that if Deku couldn't save Tomura, it'd mean he couldn't save anyone like him. And well, he didn't save Tomura. It's why this plot point of "but they get saved anyway" rings so hollow; it's unearned, unfair, unrealistic, and outright contrived & unbelievable as things have been set-up. I just cannot believe it would work out this way; it is honestly 100 times more believable to suppose the old lady was a guilt-fuelled one-off and most Tenkos will die in the streets or turn to villainy. Especially once this "the villain is dead" high has passed. Because as it is; this resolution as-presented feels as reasonable as our finale in chapter 430 suggesting Deku was so inspirational that no one was ever a villain again either.
#bnha#midoriya izuku#all might#one for all#shigaraki tomura#spinner#paranormal liberation front#PLF#hero society#enji todoroki#touya todoroki#all for one
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blorbos are how we are coping with current events
so uh. hereâs a few nice lighthearted gravity falls headcanons for you all (and yes there is a lot of ford centric ones here. no negativity about him on this post, please. preferably not about anyone else featured here either)
-both stan twins are trans. shermie was the first one they told about this, and heâs been immensely supportive of them. he started referring to them as âboysâ whenever he could, especially when filbrick was around (âyou boys ready?â and stuff like that). even though the twins havenât seen him in a while, and his relationship with ford is a little strained, they both still feel safe around him
-shermieâs daughter, the mother of the mystery twins, is transmascfem. theyâve always been much closer to her than to their father. it was her idea to get a cat, and she let the niblings pick it out. they collectively named it âsmokyâ
-both mystery twins are trans as well. as soon as he knew, stan made damn sure they were aware of his support for them. mabel told ford she was trans before dipper did, and he made sure they both knew he would support them as well
-the stan twins get a ship cat with polydactyl and name him icarus. he was supposed to work as pest control, but ford babied him too much so now heâs just there for emotional support
-upon figuring out how cellphones work, ford took an immense liking to the camera function. he frequently sends stan and the niblings pictures of anomalies, animals, or just cool stuff he finds
-stan keeps his cool when being insulted, but absolutely cannot stand it when the same happens to his family. type of guy to go âokâ when you tell him he sucks, and then turn around and threaten to murder you when you say the same to ford or the niblings
-gideon is an exception. gideon crossed the line with mabel and now stan canât help but get irrationally angry every time he sees or hears him
-ford isnât as good at math as people tend to thinks he is, and he is. so anxious about someone finding that out
-ford has maladaptive daydreaming disorder, and so does mabel
-ford initially bought the painting in the attic of a ship in a storm because it reminded him of stan
-melody and soos got a tabby cat and named it metronome. soos chose the name because it was similar in theme to âmelodyâ and cause he thought it sounded cool. melody calls the cat âbloopâ and at this point it probably thinks thatâs its actual name
-mabel uses exclusively edible glitter due to all the pets in her life (waddles, smoky, icarus, metronome)
-mabel helps pacifica realize that sheâs transmascfemneu. this makes pacifica think about things a lot, and eventually she ends up in a qpr with mabel (featuring candy and grenda as wingmen)
-wendy is bigender and enby
-ford nearly cried the first time stan made pancakes after the portal
-itâs become a running bit to call ford anything but his name and at this point heâs just given up on correcting people and chosen to embrace it
-robbieâs first name is actually robin. his friends started calling him robbie when he came out as trans and the name just stuck. heâs still very attached to ârobinâ though and has no problem being called that as well
-stan repaired his old winter jacket, though he doesnât wear it any more. ford sometimes does
-because stan runs hot and ford runs very cold, ford has a tendency to come up to stan and hug him under his coat. stan is fine with this, despite his grumblings about ford just doing it to steal some warmth
-ford experiences cuteness aggression to the max, while stan really doesnât at all. icarus has experienced both threats of being eaten/crushed and ford screaming into his fluff
-icarus has separation anxiety with ford
-stan doodles on ford a lot. the only rule is nothing on his face and do NOT touch the neck tattoo (destroyed as it may be from weirdmaggedon). yes, stanley, the all-star one. get that smug smile off your face- stop laughing-!
-fordâs sleep schedule has significantly improved since getting icarus. this is mostly because he sometimes falls asleep while waiting for icarus to move off his lap (canât move til the cat does, yâknow how it is)
-stan loves loves LOVES sunny cloudy days. they remind him of running across the beach with his brother, and watching the niblings throw water balloons at each other, and hearing his twin laugh as he tells jokes on the stan oâ war ii
-stan had ford custom engrave his lighter. he thinks it looks cool as shit
-ford has made several smoke bombs for stan. he has no clue what he keeps using them for, but he likes building things, so he doesnât mind
-mabel has set up three music playlists for the stans. one only for ford, one only for stan, and one thatâs visible to both where they can both add music
-mabel introduced ford to breakcore and noisecore. she was very surprised that he liked the two genres
-ford is agender and anattractional
-stanâs favorite smells are cinnamon, bergamot, and saltwater
-stan made sure to always have supplies to make brownies and hot chocolate on the ship in case of them need some mood lifting
-ford has a plaid weighted blanket. the cat laying on top of him every night also helps
-ford made sure stan got a good mattress that would work with his back before they set sail. stan argued with him the entire time, but he has been waking up in less pain since then
-ford always ends up hogging the blankets in any bed. more cover = better in his unconscious mind. stan doesnât really mind too much, but he would like to keep at least one blanket some time
-ford makes a startlingly good seagull impression
#gravity falls#ford pines#stan pines#mabel pines#long post#headcanons#enjoy <|:3c#and now we are done with our lunch break so. back to college stuff! have a good afternoon everyone
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jay as a bf
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pros:
- he is so romantic! i got such soft energy starting off his reading. he could be kind of old school when it comes to love. buying bouquets of flowers, gifting his person a promise ring, opening the door for them, etc. i donât think he would be able to be with someone who isnât into that cheesy romantic stuff lol
- he desires a stable relationship. an on and off relationship will not work for him. he needs the other person to be as serious about him as he is with them. even after fights, jay would be the first one to apologize and would be open to hearing his partnerâs side.
- jay wants his partner to be able to rely on him. he wants them to feel safe with him, and to consider him as a protector. he would be very much in his masculine energy when in a relationship. if his partner is scared, he would be there. if his partner needed help, he would be there.
- so cute. jay could write songs about his partner, and make playlists and dedicate it to them. music can be a big way for him to highlight his love for them.
- with jay having a career that requires him to be away a lot, he still works hard to make his partner a priority. heâs not someone whoâs firm on his career being the main thing on his mind. he doesnât want his person to feel like theyâre being put on the back burner. if they canât be together, heâll call or text whenever he can.
- he can work so hard to impress his partner lol. like i can see them telling jay about a dish they like, and jay quickly learning how to make it. or whenever they would go out, atleast in the beginning, he would take hoursss just picking out an outfit and asking his friends if he looks good. itâs random but i feel like he would smell really good lol. heâd wear a nice and expensive perfume.
cons:
- it seems jay has a small toxic side to him. first of all, he can be someone who is pretty possessive. he can probably cause issues about little things. he wouldnât like if his person would go out partying, have a lot of guy friends, stuff like that. in his relationships, this would probably be the main thing they would fight about.
- jay can sometimes be naive. letâs say he had a partner that wasnât good for him and everyone around him can see it. depending on his love for them and how long they have been together, he could potentially turn a blind eye to a lot of toxic things. jay is afraid of the other person leaving him, so he prefers not to bring those things up and pretend like it doesnât happen. he is still young though, so with age, he can start being firm with his boundaries.
- he can have trust issues. with him being in the public eye, hes careful about who he brings into his life, especially a romantic partner. i guess it depends on the person if you consider this a con or not, but he would probably need constant reassurance, or atleast a lot of convincing at first to be able to gain his trust. he could even make you feel like heâs interrogating you sometimes lol
i lowkey didnât get that many cons for jay i had to kind of force out the last 2, that makes me feel like those are parts of him that he likes to hide. maybe he has some pride lol. maybe these donât come out until heâs in an actual serious relationship.
astrological dice:
8th house, jupiter, gemini
yes, jay can have some 8th house energy to him lol. confirmation on the possessiveness. he can like to learn from them, and have them learn from him. with gemini, his relationships can be very youthful, heâll like to bring the inner child out of his partner.
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Hi! Could you please do a Spiderpool fic?
I really love this ship!So I was wondering if you could do something with Deadpool and the male reader where he's a Spider-Man but totally blind. Obviously, because he is completely blind, he has abilities that other Spider-Men do not have. Example: he would be able to perceive chemical changes in the air, he could perceive everything around him with a kind of tactile âvisionâ, based on vibrations and movement, Sharper spider sense. This would work as a close-in radar and have Fast and Accurate reflections
I imagine their first encounter was in a fight where the male reader accidentally hits Deadpool thinking he is an enemy.
Yeah sure! Iâm gonna do some headcanons!
BLIND SPIDER-MAN?
When you met, you thought Wade was one of the bad guys whoâd been popping up but when he realized you couldnât see and that you didnât know he didnât wanna hurt you, he started pulling his punches and eventually you both calmed down and he explained himself
He wants to know all about how you like âseeâ and so you show him by playfully fighting him
Once heâs pretty certain that he knows how it works, he wants to be so helpful so heâll tell you what stuff is and heâll make sure ya donât trip when you canât see stuff
You can tell when heâs in more pain coz of like body chemicals, ig, and he always tries to hide it but eventually he gives in and lets you take care of him as well
He thinks youâre the coolest and he always tells you that and heâd fight anyone who thought you werenât cool
He learns what echolocation is and it becomes like his new vocal stim so you know where he is even when heâs not moving
You take lead on missions and he usually comes in after and takes out the bad guys you hadnât noticed
Heâs so proud of you and heâs a safe space for when you want to complain about being blind and he doesnât make you feel like you should be happy coz you can kinda see
Coz of your super spider senses, he loves throwing stuff at you and seeing how quickly you catch it. It usually ends up with you hitting him with a pillow but itâs still fun
He introduces you to Blind Al and you guys become besties and he very quickly regrets that coz now he gets beaten with two pillows
#stormy writes things#x reader#x m!reader#x male reader#headcanons#wade wilson x male reader#deadpool x male reader#wade wilson x spiderman reader#deadpool x spiderman reader
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