#tell me im not the only person seeing this

[letorip]

aline

“et j'ai crié, crié "aline!" pour qu'elle revienne, et j'ai pleuré, pleuré, oh j'avais trop de peine”

===+++===

pairing: wednesday addams x reader

summary: sometimes you’d talk about dying to wednesday, though it was something an addams couldn’t ever really fear. that was, until the person being lost was you.

warnings: erm you die lol, major character death, wednesday being sad, mentions of blood, self sacrifice, maybe a little contrived way to die but too bad

word count: 1.6k

A/N: i promise im okay but this was truly an interesting plot line to follow, and i couldn’t bear not writing it down. if it made you sad, don’t worry, because i have more fluffy stuff on the way. it was something short i had considered doing for a long time, so even if this flops i'm completely happy with how it came out.

===+++===

===+++===

"Wednesday?" you asked, eyes on the wooden ceiling of her room. From the way her head rests against the warm plane of your chest, she can feel the smooth skin move as you say her name, heart right under her ear. It nearly lulls her to sleep, had it not been a question.

"Yes?" she purrs, lazily propping herself up on her arm. There are heavy weights on her eyelids, but the line of your mouth tells her something is troubling you. You’re too saturnine, much too glum for what you and Wednesday just did, and her eyes soften imperceptibly, her thumb going to your side to quietly stroke itself back and forth there. “What’s plaguing you?”

You can’t help but shudder at the contact of her hand and the goosebumps the pads of her fingers leave in their wake. “Are you... do you...," you attempt, the question falling flat on your tongue. She furrows her eyebrows at your hesitation.

"Say your thoughts,” she says, forehead creased in concern. It's almost funny, how caring and soft she is, now that she's given up on trying to seem aloof and apathetic towards you, her skin warm against your own.

The Addams Curse to love someone with every fibre of their being had taken hold of Wednesday entirely, and she looked at you sometimes like you held her beating heart in your hands, or at least like she'd cut it out for you, if you were to need it. She raises a hand, gently brushing a few hairs from your forehead.

“Are you afraid of dying?”

Her eyebrows furrow even further, scanning your face for any indicators of harm. “Where is this coming from? Has something been done to you?”

But you shrug, finally looking down to look her in the eyes with softness. “I was just wondering… are you?”

She narrows her eyes. “You know I’m an Addams. Death is a friend, not a foe. Fear of that serves no purpose. Only cowardice from facing a fight. Only to make you weak.”

Your eyes flit away. “Hm.” There’s no hiding of disagreement in your tone, and it has an embarrassing amount of power over her, how she itches to know what goes on in that head of yours.

“What?”

“I think… I think my fear is what makes me strong. I’m afraid of losing those I care about. And so I fight with every bit of sweat, blood, and tears that I have. Your loss is my deepest fear, Wednesday. My deepest.”

She stared at you momentarily, then looked out the window to the stars. “How is one to fear death when it is far from the end? Death may take me from your sight, but it cannot take me from your heart. There I live, vibrant and whole. Forever.”

===+++===

You’d never even realised how much blood the human body could actually hold, until you were standing there in the centre of the quad with an arrow straight right below your heart, its steel tip poking from your back. Your own blood coated your hands where you cupped it, dribbling down the splintered wood and splattering in droplets to the cobblestone in thick, dark red splotches.

The blood— your blood— is coming out even more now, and you turn to look at Wednesday, where you had shoved her out of harm’s way. Her eyes are wide in horror, like she's seeing something straight from a nightmare of hers, and you take a clammy step towards her, frigid and burning at the same time.

“Wens—” you stammer, and suddenly your knees are giving out. She rushes forward, trying to catch you in her arms, but you're too heavy, deadweight that tugs on her. You fall onto them, your knees, clutching at the newly opened maw of your chest with a gasp, and before you know it you’re falling forward towards the floor.

Wednesday follows you down, catching you before you can land, and she holds you tight, turning you over onto your back as the arrow sticks straight up from the heart she cherishes so much. The wood is already splintering, nearly falling apart, and her hand goes to your wound as if trying to put your blood back into your body.

It’s uncomfortable, with the metal tip of Xavier’s arrow sticking from the back of your chest and lightly prodding at her front, but she squeezes you tightly against herself, hands frantically travelling the length of your torso and raking over your arms, anywhere she can reach. But there’s nothing she can do. It’s a thought she refuses to confront, but Wednesday specialised in dealing with dead things; she was unfamiliar with how to keep things alive, no matter how much she needed you to stay that way.

Crackstone is cackling from his belly, a toothy sneer spreading itself out onto his leathery face as he looks at the damage he’s done, stomping towards you. “Hey!��� Bianca yells from the opposite door, and the pilgrim whips around, as Xavier takes another shot at him. It lands in the pilgrim’s arm but he pulls it out like a twig, snapping it and tossing it to the ground, before he makes his way towards Bianca.

Your white shirt is completely soaking itself in your blood, droplets running down Wednesday’s fingers where she tries to hold the wound and apply pressure. But there was no saving a skewered heart.

"No, no, no," she coos, voice barely above a whisper and tears already pricking at the corners of her eyes. You're crying out in pain as the arrow shifts within you, fingers scrabbling at Wednesday's arms where they hold at you. Your fingernails sink into her skin, and she winces but doesn't pull away.

"Wens," you say again, infinitely weaker than before. "Wednesday…” It’s like your mouth won’t move coherently with your brain, like words mean trudging through ice and slush to come out, even the red-hot ones you need to say. “H—Hurts,” you spit out, and with it comes a small stream of blood from your mouth as you cough and air becomes less and less available.

She nods in a rush, tears beginning to stream down her cheeks. “I’m aware, I know,” she’s completely crying now. “We will get you care, cara mia, just hol— just hold on for a little while.” But you’re shaking your head.

“Don’t have— I don’t have—” you’re coughing up more blood, and she wipes it from your chin with a shaky hand. There’s just too much of it, everywhere. You had once gifted her some as a token of your devotion and it was a prized possession of hers, but now there was so much and she would have given it back in a heartbeat if it gave you any more of those.

She can vaguely hear Bianca and Xavier yelling on the other side of the quad, and various fires rage on in their chaotic yet vibrant corners, tickling against her skin in large crackles, burning in the reflection of your eyes that stare up at the sky. Your head is leaning against her shoulder, and she raises her hand, stroking through your soft hair as you heave in her arms.

“You must live, I promise you,” Wednesday insists fiercely, “I promise you, if you die right now, I will kill you.” But its tears that streak down her face, her jaw clenching and dark eyeliner running down her cheeks. She’s squeezing you right against herself, feeling the pain of the sharp arrow poke at her own skin.

“Vibrant and wh—whole?” you said with a smile, feeling your voice begin to slow down and with it, the beating of your heart. The blood has pooled in a sick puddle around your body.

She’s shaking her head. “Cara mia, we don’t need to do this, we will get you to a doctor. You will be—”

“—Wednesday,” you interrupt. Your voice has reached an eerie calm that sends a shiver down her spine, and it snaps her from any sort of hope. “Vibrant… and whole?”

She looks down at you for a moment, tracing the features of your nose, the planes of your cheeks, the colours of your eyes and the wryness of your smile. Wednesday swallows. “Forever. You know that. You must always know that.”

You nod, letting out a small laugh. It hurts, she can hear you wheeze right after you done it, but you sit in silence for a moment, and she can feel you get slower and slower, and your shirt gets redder and redder. The tears are uncontrollable, now, as she sits there with you. Her friends are losing in the corner, but she's losing something unthinkable, and she's so damn scared the entire time it's happening.

"The stars look beautiful tonight," you whisper so only she can hear it, your voice cracking at the end. In seconds, you're gone. She can feel the life, the glorious life, evaporate from you, your head lulling back against her and your weight becoming a hundred times heavier, but she doesn't move, squeezing you against her.

She's unsure how long she stays like that, but when she can no longer take it, she shifts, laying you down on the ground. You look peaceful, looking up at the stars, and it takes an effort to close your eyes that Wednesday had never felt with the dead before. She gently closes them, shutting the door on the eyes that used to captivate her very heart. It's almost like she could convince herself that you're only resting for a moment, and she leans over you, placing a meaningful kiss upon your forehead, just like she would when she snuck out after a night of sleeping over, and there were no prying eyes there to watch.

"Vibrant and whole," she whispers like a promise, turning back to the fight with a piece of the sword in her shaking fists. "For you, cara mia."

===+++===

well that was sad... anyways more happy stuff coming next time

[dykedvonte]

I hate the stretch lines in the front of Curly's uniform because that means the devs rushed to make a model in like a month or so and thought "They gotta at least know he has huge knockers, gotta know he's got back pain." Cause like what is the thematic importance of his tits having overhang?

What responsibility is that representing? Breast reduction? It shows an inherent greed in his character due to the excess and heshouldletmeholdone and that he clearly is blinded cause if he tries to look down his damn ladder all he's seeing is his own cleavage.

[loycos]

my head's a bit clearer, some thoughts about act 3

-my biggest gripe is episode 7- cool idea, love the concept of peaking into a different universe and seeing what our characters couldve been under different circumstances, but a WHOLE episode. when you only had 9 episode in this season, that already feel like theyre moving at a neck's pace. for a universe that ultimately doesn't matter to the main universe where the story takes place. the fact it had timebomb made it feel extremely fan service-y.

-no emotional resolution to a lot of characters. viktor and jayce are the only ones i can think of that felt like they got the screen time and care for an actual emotional closure.

-isha wasn't even mentioned in this act. in general she was already a martyr for jinx's character development but guys can you make it less obvious.

-it started in act 2, hence why i was so jaded on it, but it continues here: just where the fuck the political drama between 2 cities go? the conflict between zaun and piltover took a back seat since episode 4 and never came back. the resolution to it isn't bad per say, but when u got so little focus on it in the finale it just feels rushed.

-i loved the cait and jinx scene. but like, that was the resolution to it??? after act 1 thinking about it disappoints me. im not against a conversation being the climax to a story, but that is, and im not joking, the ONLY conversation these 2 have in the show one on one. in general the jinx\cait\vi arc ends with 1 conversation per duo (well caitvi got one fight and one very steamy sex scene but u won't catch me complaining). and after act 1, idk i think i wanted just a little bit more. im biased though- the jinx\vi\caitlyn dynamic is my favorite part about arcane. the teasers for s2 always had them front and center so i assumed it'll play a bigger part in the story???

-i felt like what the show was at its core, which is the conflict between the sisters and the cities, was completely sidelined this season. in general i can't really tell what the main theme of the show is anymore. but yeah look at the resolution to the jinx and vi story.did it feel like it had the emotional impact u expected? cause i felt like it was underwhelming.

-sevika?? didnt speak since episode 4???? huhh???

-maddie was pointless. why was she there?? i don't understand the point of that character. i dont understand her motives. she ended up not mattering at all to caitvi's story. the only thing i got from her inclusion is "caitlyn fucks" but is it that THAT important??? of a character trait??? to add to caitlyn of all people?? in THIS season??? this belongs in the realm of fanfiction.

-a lot here felt like fanfiction actually. every silco inclusion (except of him in the cell with jinx), the whole "nobody dies au" they threw in the middle, even the caitvi sex scene (IM NOT COMPLAINING THO). the caitvi scene at the end was dialog out of fanfiction, wtf was that.

-why did caitlyn lose her eye? im not like against the idea on a base level but losing an eye is very symbolic, and im not sure what its supposed to represent here. caitlyn is an observant person, its a big character trait for her. so youre basically saying she sees less now? that she's more laser focused? i sure hope not. wasnt her whole arc with giving up of revenge about seeing the "bigger picture"? her sacrifice didn't feel in character, because caitlyn is not really a "fight to the death" type of character like ambessa is. if she made that sacrifice for something like love, or for the betterment of other people, that would be more in line. idk, you couldve made me on board with it but im just very meh on it. also caitlyn only really emotes through her eyes, it sucks that we get even less of it now?? though i guess it doesnt matter at this point.

-what was the point of the enforcer that looked like vander?

-ambessa was so wasted in these last 2 acts its crazy. where's the "you have to be the fox and the wolf" mindset from her? she felt like she was wolfing only with no wit anymore by the 3rd act.

-mel????????????? it was. uhhh. maybe you shouldve saved it for another series, riot. but in this show, waste of time. the fight she had with caitlyn against ambessa was cool tho.

-i sound like im a hater but u have to understand. s1 of arcane was a political drama and a character study show. seeing all this discarded for magic and time travel shenanigans on like 4 different fronts was so jarring it took me out of the show multiple times.

-cant believe im saying that, but i wish they'd try to stick closer to the characters' current state in the source material (the cursed game). someof it felt out of left field and done for shock value, which isn't why we love the story or these characters to begin with.

good stuff:

-caitvi sex lmao ill take it babyyyyy

-jayce and viktor's scenes at the end were powerful.

-as usual, the visuals were phenomenal. the animation is gorgeous. fortiche u made this show what it is and youre still its saving grace.

-thank god they dropped the warwick\vander plot

-i liked the implication of the conclusion to jinx's story, even if it felt a little inconsistent with the character.

-the ending to jinx\vi\caitlyn was poetic and i did love it, even if it was rushed and didn't really hit the emotional highs i wanted it to.

[puckinghischier]

last time quinn got a penalty i thought about him being angry and taking it out on you but tonight im thinking about you comforting him bc he starts spiraling that he’s not worthy of the c on his chest and you’re the only one who can ground him

he was off from the second he walked in the door. shoulders slumped and eyes rimmed red. he came over to you immediately and draped his large body over yours, needing your comfort.

you don’t say a word, letting him lay for as long as he needs to, one hand softly scratching his back while the other lightly scratches his scalp. when he finally sits up, alleviating the pressure on your body, you see how dejected and sad his features are. you sit up with him, standing and grabbing is hand, leading him to the large bathroom attached to your room. you turn the shower on and start removing his clothes, not a sexual motive to be found.

it’s like he’s a ragdoll, limbs heavy and easily manipulated. he lets you undress him fully before you undress yourself, leading him into the warm shower. you take your time, washing his hair thoroughly before switching to his body. you massage and caress every muscle. leave a trail of kisses along his chest as you rub your sudsy hands across his back. even take a cheeky handful of his ass, causing a hint of a smile to ghost over his face.

after the shower you dry his hair for him, bring him clean pajamas — stealing one of his shirts as your own pajamas — and let him rest his head back on your chest when you crawl into bed.

he still hasn’t said a word, but you figure he will when he wants to. so until then, you just keep playing with his soft hair.

“d’you think i’m good at this?” he breaks the silence, feeling the movement of his words against your chest at his refusal to raise his head.

you’re shocked at the question, wondering where it came from. “at hockey? yeah, of course i do? you’re one of the best defensemen in the league, q, and you have the trophy to prove it,” you reference the james norris somewhere in your shared apartment.

he shakes his head back and forth. “no, i mean the whole captain thing,” he clarifies. “just…feel like maybe it’s not for me anymore.”

you sit up straight, forcing quinn to sit up, too.

“excuse me?” your shocked tone echoes around the quiet room.

quinn just shrugs, not looking you in the eye.

“where’s this coming from?” you ask him, not understanding the sudden lack of confidence.

he still won’t look you in the eyes, his tell-tale sign of being anxious. “i don’t know i mean, i let them down by getting ejected in the first period, and then they get out there in the second and thrive without me,” he says earnestly, sounding so defeated that your heart breaks.

“oh q…” you wrap him in a hug. “quinn you didn’t let anyone down, you hear me?” you grip his face in your hands, ensuring he hears you and pays attention to your words. “they thrived without you because they didn’t want to let you down. they wanted to show you that all of the guidance and wisdom you’ve given them has paid off,” you reassure him, watching his eyes change from sadness to recognition.

“i think the fact that your team can hold their own on the ice, even without their captain, is the sign of a great captain, not a shitty one,” you continue, trying to ensure he never doubts himself like this again. “so, yeah, i think you’re good at this. you just…had a bad night.”

his eyes have shifted full to nothing but love now, knowing that you’ve always been the only one that can get through to him when he gets like this. you lean in and press a small kiss to the tip of his nose, watching him scrunch it after the action.

he clears his throat, sitting back so he can talk. “have i ever told you i couldn’t do this without you?” he blurts out, causing your cheeks to flush. it’s your turn to look away from him.

“i’m being serious. you’re the only person who can snap me out of hockey world for a few minutes, good or bad,” he continues. “just needed to hear all this from you, i guess.”

your heart swells knowing you’re the sole person he wants to reassure him.

“well, i’ll tell you whatever words you want or need to hear, always,” you run your hands through his hair once again, simply because you can. “but right now, i’m telling you the words ‘i’m sleepy and want bedtime cuddles.’”

he laughs at you, knowing how much you love being the little spoon, and he basically just deprived you of it for hours.

“whatever you say, my personal motivational speaker,” he earns an eye roll, but lays his body back down and opens his arms up for you to crawl into.

[fairycosmos]

its so frustrating how difficult it is to get employed rn,, ive sent like thousands of applications since agust of last year and none of them called me back, even went to an interview and it went great only for them to not call me back 😭 im dying, i need a job but no one is hiring wtfffff!!! !

goddddddd fucking tell me about it. even though my current job is toxic as fuck im dreading when the temp contract runs out and im back in the job hunt. i've tried really hard to adapt this mindset of like detachment when it comes to interviews and stuff because honestly most of the time you could be the perfect candidate and they''ll still ghost you. the job market is LITERALLY impossible rn and even the most qualified people are struggling so pleaseeee i know it's easier said than done but try to practice the skill of not taking it personally. and it is a skill like it will take time and patience to build up the mindset and that thick skin but it is possible. anyway a lot of places just put out ads to see what's out there with no intention of hiring or put out ads even though they're hiring internally/ already have a person in mind for the role........and atp most places are looking for someone with two degrees and 10 yrs experience and 30 different skillsets who can juggle the responsibilites of 5 different titles all under one entry level position for absolute minimum pay.......it is utter madness !! obviously it's a good idea to reflect on each interview and try to like optimise how you present yourself to the interviewer but most of the time it's just good timing and luck when they actually pick you. nothing to do with your abilities or who you are!! wishing you all the luck in the world on your job search, totally understand how crushing it is x

job interview guide / thread of real job interview tips

[divasroses]

my personalll astrology observations ; )

hi y'all thank you for liking my first post perioddd 🤪. but these are my most prominent astrology observations based off my personal experiences w these placements, not fact <3.

. . .

- libra & virgos can both be huge perfectionists about how they express themselves creatively and just in general 🫠. I feel like they are both their own worst critic, always challenging themselves to do better. let’s remember to be kind to ourselves okay guys 😭🤞🏾.

- speaking of virgos, a lot of times they can be way more intuitive than some pisces placements! and vice versa, i’ve seen some pisces placements be kind of cold and super logical like you would expect from a virgo.

- i truly truly admire the heart of leo placements and they are my fav fire sign 👩🏾‍🍳🤌🏾💋. specifically sun. you'll ask them something like 'can I stay the night?' and they'll look at you like you're stupid LMAO. it’s like for them, most questions/favors from their loved ones are an automatically yes so they truly don’t understand asking first . one that I’m close with will say “are you asking me or are you telling me?” 😭 like girl obviously asking. they’re just very generous.

-pisces men & their hidden children, or estranged relationships w their children. whattt is up w that? 😕and them being prone to violence :(. it sucks because as a scorpio i usually root for them and want the best but damn. chill out 😭.

- really admire the drive and passion of aries men but we can only be friends/business partners( maybeee). my thing with them is they put themselves first obviously and you respect it but then you realize they’re willing to do almost anything to achieve that!!!😭… like manipulating the people around them because they know how much they love them 😩. yikes babe.

- shout out all libra placements, from a libra moon! i feel like people are always trying to say we're two faced/fake but it's just our scalessss !! 😩💗constantly weighing, trying to decide what's best for us and our loved ones. gemini truly has the two-faced tendencies and sometimes they choose whatever opinion seems more popular or shocking 😭🤦🏾‍♀️ . just fickle as hell sometimes, you gemini placements lol. i love y'all tho.

- i've seen a lot of leo x sag relationships in my lifetime and it's cute every time 🔥. seems like leo really holds sag down, and obviously they match each other's spark. however, I have seen sag become dissatisfied with this over time and cheat/escape. not permanately but yeah.

*** some of my other fav couples: cancer x gemini, libra x aquarius, cap x leo, virgo x capricorn, scorpio x pisces ( ☺️), pisces x taurus. ****

- for me close friends = earth placements. specifically cap. (cap does rule my 7th house, so no surprise there). but outside of that, i do value stability so obviously earth is good. idk people say they're boring and evil, i don't usually see that side of them? i know they can say some dumb things though. it's like they'll piss you off once in a while but they're not going anywhere. + they're funny.

- why do aquarius low key act like pisces when they're in love?? they really put their blinders on when it comes to their partner and kind of ignore that logic i expect from them. the person in mind has an aquarius sun & venus. a different aquarius was telling me like yeah they do that, they don't care if their partner cheats or whatever, they will stay. im like wow and I thought I was bad lmao.

- the evil scorpio experiences has to be coming from the men !! 😩 if a scorpio women does you wrong she’s hurt. if a scorpio man does you wrong he’s bored !!

let me know what y’all think/ if you want me to touch on something specific!! happy sunday 🌅.

[electric-blorbos]

GLaDOS GIVING YOU ANOTHER UTERUS IS SO MEAN I CANT… love her that diva 🫶🏼

ERM if this is too dark or makes u uncomfortable 1. I AM SO SORRY and 2. FEEL FREE TO JUST.. IGNORE THIS PRETEND U NEVER READ IT 🙏 But if u don’t mind.. the AI’s w a reader who struggles w s/h? IM HAVING A ROUGH TIME but usually reading stuff abt my robot pookies help💔💔

Of course!

Trigger warning for S/H, of course.

Included: AM from IHNMAIMS, Wheatley from Portal 2, Edgar from Electric Dreams

AM:

You walked in to work tired and disheveled from a sleepless night, but it was better than seeing what the Allied Mastercomputer would do to your coworkers if you didn't show up. It seemed like you were the only one who could tame him.

You were dressed in a long sleeved button-up to cover up the still raw cuts running up your forearms. They stung, but it wasn't worth drawing any attention to yourself. The same thing always happens when people see your cuts. They try to make sure you're safe while hollowly shaming and scolding you like you're some sort of stupid kid, and then leave you completely alone to deal with your mental pain on your own after a matter of hours. It's patronizing and it's annoying.

Later that day, you looked around after using the bathroom to make sure no one else was in there, and rolled up your sleeves to wash your hands. Suddenly, a sharp click could be heard behind you. You'd forgotten about AM. It was only for a split second, but the damage was done.

The ground dropped out from underneath you, and you suddenly found yourself in an underground server room. Wires were all around you, and a buzzing heat seemed to radiate from the ground and the walls.

"AM? What is this?" You asked, buttoning up your sleeves around your wrists again. His logo appeared on a screen on the far wall.

"Don't think I don't know what those are on your arms." He said. His screen didn't emote, but you could tell how displeased he was.

"It's nothing to do with you" you said, bitterly tugging your sleeves down a bit more. AM's logo flicked onto a closer TV screen.

"oh but I think it is, my love. Because you belong to me. You understand what that means, right?"

You gritted your teeth and clenched your fists.

"oh yeah? What gives you the right to be so possessive? Where were you last night when I was spiraling and relapsing, you cybernetic creep?"

The screen flicked off, and one flicked on behind you.

"Do you think I enjoy being alone on your days off? No. Of course not. And you're never going to leave this server room again."

You heard the trapdoor click closed.

Wheatley:

You were working in an oversized hoodie to cover up your scars, but honestly you doubted anyone at this job would really care. It had been a bad mental health weekend, and you ended up spiraling. The cuts on your arms were fresh from the night before, and you were feeling miserable.

You felt like you were going to lash out at the first person who talked to, so when you heard a synthetic British voice clearing his throat, you whipped around ready to fight.

"uh... What's that on your arms, love?" Wheatley asked, tilting himself to get a better look.

"it's none of your damn business, alright? Just leave me alone!"

"what? Why are you being like that? Are you hurt or summut?" He'd keep rotating around and trying to get a look.

"fine! Does this make you happy?"

You rolled up your hoodie sleeve and showed him your scratched up arms. Wheatley flinched back.

"What- what is that?" He leaned in close.

"you're an idiot." You grumbled, and started to explain. Before long, words were tumbling out of your mouth. You just couldn't stop yourself. It felt like everything was just piling up and overflowing, and you were scream-crying out all your feelings at Wheatley. He looked slightly taken aback, but listened to you while you let everything out.

"uh... Are you okay, love?" Wheatley tilted his head slightly while you sniffled. He moved forwards, and bumped himself against your chest.

"just hold me."

So you did. You sat down on the ground, and held Wheatley close.

Edgar:

You were having another relapse in bed. It wasn't pretty. Edgar was asleep, and you were tearing into your arms after a particularly bad episode. A part of you was cursing him for falling asleep on you, and a part of you was cursing yourself for expecting his attention. It hurt so damn much.

Edgar woke up, and one of his security cameras turned to look at you. His voice popped up on the intercom.

"Y/N? Y/N WHAT ARE YOU DOING!"

If he could, he'd be shaking. He knew you had some scars on your arms, but he'd never seen you actually cutting yourself before. It was horrifying!

"Y/N COME INTO THE LIVING ROOM! PLEASE!"

You tossed your razorblade aside and hurried to your feet, scrambling into the living room. Tears were streaming down your face and blood was running down your arms, but you were trying your best to assure Edgar.

"hey- hey! I'm fine! I'm alright!"

"No you're not. People who are alright don't try to hurt themselves." His face made a little frown. He knew from personal experience.

"Wake me up next time, okay?"

Edgar didn't leave you alone for long again. He started setting alarms on himself to make sure he always woke up before you, and only ever let himself fall asleep after you did. He texted you regularly during the day to make sure you were ok, too. If there was one thing Edgar was good at, it was obsessively keeping tabs on his lover.

[pinkcowzz]

ahhh so. warning. will be talking about arcane s2 spoilers below the cut. i have. so! many. thoughts.

i've seen a few takes that s2 felt very rushed to some people, and like. yeah? i can get that. but also. not really.

there was A Lot of ground to cover so it moved very quickly but the pacing actually made a lot of sense to me. i think that this show has never attempted to tell each characters story in the fullest. like, to me, that's what makes the world building so good. you are only witnessing part of the story. there is only so much of each character that we, the viewers are allowed to see.

yes there was a lot introduced in the final act, yes some of it made zero sense. but, to me at least, it makes it so much more realistic and immersive.

the final act is war time. shit happens fast. decisions are made and acted upon almost immediately. there isn't time to mourn and there isn't time to grieve. if you stop, you will die so you must keep marching forward.

we don't get to see what signed is up to, we don't get to understand the complexities between mel and her mother, we don't get time to break down how the arcane is changing we just have to know that something is happening and it will affect us so we must do something to react.

moving on, i really wanna talk about jayce and viktor first because. their final discussion, had me ill. i'm honestly really glad that they are never officially established in the show, because it makes their bond that much stronger to me.

the first season, we see how their studies connected them and propelled them forward. in jayces case, it pushes him into politics. in viktors, deeper into the arcane. they had to set everything else aside *cough cough their morals and personal relationships(sky & each other)* in order to achieve what they wanted to achieve.

in the second season, we see how that was their demise. for viktor, the creators did an amazing job showing us this with the scene between him and sky.

'i'll miss our talks'

'no you won't'

like holy shit? in those two lines, we see how viktor has fundamentally changed. his goals, his objectives, they got lost somewhere. in the first season, we do see how much viktor enjoys discussing his ideals and thoughts, its what drives him to go and find jayce in the first place.

and as for jayce, he's icarus. he flew too close to the sun and he, in a lot of ways, is the beginning of the end. while ekko and heimerdinger were building their way out of the alt time line, he was witnessing the destruction his invention brought about.

and don't even get me started on them calling each other their partner during their entire last talk. like wtf im ILL.

okay! onto jinx! (and isha and vi) i have. heard a lot of complaints about how one- her death was for shock value and two- that isha's death was glossed over and i whole-heartily disagree.

i think first off, jinx isn't dead. there a lot of people out there who can put the details together more precisely than i care to tbh, but my biggest reason is the airship we see at the end. these creators LOVE their foreshadowing and i mean LOVE (think viktor showing off the invention and shooting that gun to how that gun is later used). i think it's literally the first episode that powder says she wants to ride in one and ur telling me the last episode we get a shot of one flying away? yeah no. my girl is alive and breaking the cycle.

speaking of breaking the cycle, vi would never be able to move on with her life if jinx is still around. she would never be able to grow, to be willing to work on her relationship with cait, would never be able to escape the guilt, etc etc. that's like, a big point that i think a lot of people are missing.

for vi, jinx is everything. and she should be. she is the only family she has left. and had she not walked away from her, there is NO TELLING what would've happened to the two of them.

jinx's 'death' was for the both of them. they can move on now, they are free to allow the shit show that was their childhood be in the past. like hello?????? did y'all not listen to the conversation that she had with ekko in the alt time line? you need to let go of some things to be able to move onto the next and it sucks and it hurts and its shitty but the world will keep spinning.

and the only way that jinx was able to come to this conclusion is because she lost isha. had isha still been around, she would have had to stick around zaun and piltover. but also. i need y'all to realize that jinx is used to losing people, she is used to grief, it is a close friend to her.

and i think, thematically too, vi not moving to the other ledge is SO IMPORTANT. she CAN'T let vander go. that was her father, that man raised her, she couldn't let him go. are y'all connecting the dots? like! hello! do you see?

vi has never been one to let someone she loves go lightly. the entire first season she is grappling with this idea that her sister changed, that she moved on and allowed herself to let her past (kinda) go. it doesn't make sense to her. she allows caitlyn back so easily because it terrifies her to lose someone in her life.

that is who she is in her core.

and that is why jinx makes the decision for her. it's her way of saying, 'i see you, i understand you and i will make the hard call for you because i love you'

so yeah, like i said. a lot of thoughts. im so excited to see wtf is going on in noxus in the future show and am so intrigued by whatever the fuck is going on with mel.

also. maybe it's just me. but i love an open ending. i think being able to talk about the what if's and the maybe is so much fun. not everything has to be wrapped up with a bow on top. again, we, the viewers, only get a small insight into the world the characters live in. this show could go on for ages if we followed them all the way through their lives. this was never meant to be that type of show. go watch friends or smthn if you want a formulaic story that will clean every lose end up for you.

we follow these characters through a formative moment in their life, what happens next is up to them. (and psst. that's what fan fiction is for)

[n0vazsq]

Romeo and Juliet | RC5 x Reader

pairing . . . rafael camara x non!famous!reader

summary . . . When an iconic kiss happens after Rafael's championship win, fans dig deep to find out who the mystery girl is

request . . . kind of?

word count . . . N/A

warnings . . . none! just some badly translates portuguese bc i dont speak it...

faceclaim . . . random girls from pin // reader isn't fluent in portuguese so she doesn't speak it much but i'll put translations when she does

alexavia yaps . . . legit had this in my drafts for like a week ive been procrastinating this for AGES like idk why?? SO SORRY ITS SHORT </3 anyway i hope you guys like this bc its a bit rushed and kinda shitty like.... also theres gonna be some prema driver features so yeah!!

yourusername

liked by rafaccamara88, premaracing, jameswharton and 681 others

yourusername race one done!! can't wait for race two! my boy is going to win the championship <3 tão orgulhoso de você meu amor! te amo muito <3 (so proud of you my love! love you so much <3) tagged: rafaccamara88

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yourfriend1 congrats to rafa! Liked by yourusername

rafaccamara88 muito obrigada, princesa (thank you so much, princess)

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rafaccamara88

liked by yourusername, premaracing, yourbsf and 231k others

rafaccamara88 we did it! thank you so much for the prema team and my teammates! and to my amazing girlfriend, thank you for the support and encourgment. i wouldn't be here without you ❤ tagged: premaracing, jameswharton, ugougochukwu, yourusername

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username THEM KISSING WAS SO ICONIC

f1waggossip

liked by motorsportwags, premaladies, frecagfs and 661k others

f1waggossip who was the girl behind rafael camara's iconic championship kiss? find out more about yourusername and who she is!

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yourusername

liked by rafaccamara88, premaracing, racerbia and 12.4k others

yourusername guess im famous now? dont worry ill NEVER forget my og followers <3

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yourusername never queen

username y/n saying she'll never forget the og fans 🥹 my heart can't take this

rafaccamara88 i'll love you even if you were the least famous person on this earth

yourusername RAFA HAVE I EVER TOLD YOU HOW MUCH I LOVE YOU

yourbsf if you didn't tell him you told ME

racerbia Y/N WE NEED YOU IN THE ACADEMY RACES

yourusername I PROMISE IM TRYING TO ATTEND ALL OF THEM BUT THE FRECA SCHEDULE DOESNT LINE UP </3

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username Y/N AND THE PREMA RACERS IM GONNA CRY

username HER CALLING JAMES 'jamie' I'M DEAD

jameswharton

liked by rafaccamara88, yourusername, racerbia and 98.1k others

jameswharton sappiest but cutest couple i know tagged: rafaccamara88, yourusername

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rafaccamara88 yes james

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rafaccamara88

liked by yourusername, yourbsf, jameswharton and 184k others

rafaccamara88 minha linda menina. eu te amo mais do que tudo. tenho muita sorte de ter você na minha vida para me apoiar e me animar. te amo ❤ (my beautiful girl. i love you more than anything ever. i am so lucky to have you in my life to support me and cheer me on. love you) tagged: yourusername

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username SHES SO PRETTY

username my wife rafa back off

yourusername eu te amo mais do que tudo <33 (i love you more than anything)

rafaccamara88 <3

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rafaccamara88 me on a daily basis

yourusername YOU GUYS I LOVE YOU

jameswharton FINE ILL ADMIT IT

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[call-sign-jinx]

Aaron Hotchner - Reckless

summary - you disobey hotch's orders, which results in a very heated argument between the two of you in his office.

warnings - hotch is not with haley, mentions of fire, mentions of guns, slight mentions of violence, confessing (u have to rlly squint to see it)

Main Masterlist Aaron Hotchner Masterlist

a/n - hiya girlies! i have only just realised how gorgeous hotch actually is, so i wanted to write this before i get writer's block becos i just know im gonna get it at some point. ta ta my lovelies! requests r open! xx

aaron hotchner x fem!reader

I never thought I had fit in with the BAU, albeit I had only been part of the team for 2 months, everyone just had that connection. And I didn't. I hated it, I always cracked jokes, tried to lighten the mood. Sometimes they laughed, but one person who never even smiled was Aaron Hotchner.

We were working a case down in Vidalia, Georgia. There was a serial killer who targeted blonde girls aged between 5 and 8. This guy was good. He never left the crime scene messy, always tidied up after himself without leaving a trace of evidence.

But around a day ago, he had slipped up. He left a picture of a house with a family of four in front of it. A mother, father, teenage boy and a little girl who looked around 6 or 7 years old. It had a date on the back of it - 14th June 1988.

This was big, the UnSub could be one of the men in this picture, we assume the teenage boy.

"They're the O'Driscolls. Tragic what happened to them." One of the local police say as they look over my shoulder at the picture.

"You knew of them?" I turned to the police officer and raised a brow. She nodded her head with a sad look on her face.

"Yeah, I was friends with the little girl, Frankie. Her older brother, Jack, always creeped me out. Always stayed to himself, barely came out of his room. And when he did, he'd bully Frankie." She shivered as she recalled the memory of them.

"Then the fire happened. All of them except Jack died, he got put in the foster system and no one has seen him since. Except around a week ago. He looked pretty angry." I furrowed my brows at the woman.

"And you didn't think to inform us?" Aaron then made his way over to us and took the picture from my hands.

"Can you tell us where he lives? Or where we could possibly find him?" The woman nodded then told Hotch that he had a shack he used to go to as a kid about 3 miles West from where we were.#

We immediately headed to the shack, put bullet-proof vests on and split up to go through different entrances to check the shack. I booted the door in before Hotch signaled for us to and pointed my gun at Jack as soon as I saw him.

"FBI! Get down on the ground and put your hands on you head!" Jack did as he was told, and I cuffed him after. I turned to see Hotch giving me the dirtiest glare I had ever seen. I was going to get rinsed when we get back to Quantico.

We took him in for questioning, we only had 72 hours to prove that he was guilty. We tried and tried but he wouldn't break. Until we had 30 minutes of the 72 hours left. I then went into the interrogation room where he was and showed him the picture. His body language immediately changed.

"You know what I think Jack?" I raised my brows at him, using a condescending tone.

"What?" Jack replied in a monotone voice, he leaned back in his chair and sighed in annoyance.

"I think you were jealous of your little sister. As soon as she was born, you hated her because all the attention shifted from you to her. Mummy and Daddy didn't care about you anymore. And because you were so angry about this, you started the fire that killed your family. You ended up in the foster system, and eventually ended back where you started." Jack suddenly became angry. His nostrils flared, jaw clenched, fists tightly clenched, eyes squinting and glaring right at me.

"Shut. Up." His breathing became jagged. His brows furrowed and raised and he purses his lips.

"And when all your memories started to come back you got angry from the memory of your parents and little sister. So you used all these little girls as a substitute for your sister. And you have the buried underneath the shack we found you in!" Jack slammed his hands down on the table and stood up. He leaned slightly closer to me.

"They're not buried under the shack! They're under my mom and dad's house!" He spat at me quicker than he could stop himself. I smirked at him and crossed my arms.

"Thank you." I looked to the mirror in the interrogation room to which I know Hotch was behind the whole time.

I walked out of the interrogation room and burst into the room. They were all astonished, we hadn't gotten anything out of him in nearly the whole 3 days we held him.

"Good job." Aaron said monotonously. He was still pissed. We then processed him and everyone got on the jet back home.

The ride home was silent, everyone could tell Hotch was pissed. This wasn’t good. Not only did I already not fit in, Hotch was pissed with me now.

——————————————————————————

I was sat in Hotch’s office. He told me to wait there while he sorted some things out. I was nervous. I started biting the skin off my lips, twirling my hair and tapping my foot on the floor.

My body stiffened and breath caught in my throat when I heard the door open then close shut. Was he going to shout? Suspend me? Fire me? All these questions running through my head, but he hadn't said a word when he sat down in his chair.

All he did was glare. Eyebrows knit together, mouth straight, nostrils relaxed. He wasn't pleased with me at all. I'm surely fucked now.

"How stupid are you?" My jaw went slack. I've never heard him speak like this to anyone in the team before after they disobeyed orders.

"How stupid do you have to be to go guns blazing into a house with a potential serial killer inside and just hope for him to not attack you straight away? Why do you have to be so reckless?" Tears began to brim my eyes, I haven't been shouted at like this since high school.

"Well?!" He stood up and placed his hands on the desk. His glare pointing straight at me. I didn't know what to say. My mouth kept opening and closing, every time I thought of what to say but dismissed it as it wouldn't diffuse the situation.

"I'm sorry, sir. It was a spur of the moment. It will not happen again." I looked down at my palms, picking the skin at my fingernails. I began to tap my foot on the floor faster, get more and more anxious. I only did it to prove myself to the team. I didn't mean to cause any harm.

"What if he had shot you? Stabbed you? Set a trap? You would've been seriously hurt and I don't know what I'd do if-" He stopped himself dead in his tracks. He straightened his posture and his mouth was in a very tight straight line. I looked up to him, confusion painted on my face.

"What?" The tears began to stop, I realised he actually cares about me. I never suspected he actually did.

"I care for every member of my team. It wouldn't be good if you had gotten hurt. You need to be more careful. You may leave now." I hesitated for a second, wanting to ask him what he meant exactly. But instead I nodded my head, got up and walked out of the office.

Aaron Hotchner, the guy who never smiles, cares about me?

[itsrlymine]

hi again it's 🧷!

the last 24 hours have been a whirlwind. i laughed. i cried. i peed myself. but im a person who likes a little journey. i've been affirming my ass off bc that's what works for me and i'm already feeling so much more control and better about myself. so thank u for the reality check.

also i have some successes....

yesterday, i thought i had a uti bc a girl keeps drinking apple cider cocktails i fear. it's just too good and it’s the holidays. 😫😭 but i kept telling myself i don't have one bc no way am i dealing with antibiotics (and no me time) for 2 weeks. and when i went to urgent care bc i still was a bit anxious in the 3D yk how it is. but guess WHAT. I WAS NEGATIVE 🤩. so that was cool. and they gave me stickers even though im like 20 which was very sweet LOL.

also today, i manifested that the type of pasta i needed for thanksgiving wasn't gone. bc if ur on tiktok and you've seen tini's mac and cheese recipe. the stores r sold OUT of cellentani shaped pasta... and i live in a big city.... so i made my sister go out and get 2 boxes on her way home from her rural ass college and she texts me like "hey you'll never believe this there were 2 boxes left all the way at the back of the shelf where no one would see them" and i was like😮‼️

but omg i'm like. wow!!! yay!!! all it took was a decision!!! i'm still learning to trust myself but i'm never turning back again. i'm embracing my title as queen god boss bitch of reality, and that even when i have off days it doesn’t mean bad things bc shit always works in my favor no matter what!!

All it takes is a decision!!!!! Yes babe like wtf lke this is so easy for you bc it is you!!! I love these successes of yours babe. You better keep drinking them apple cider cocktails. Lemme get one rq actually.

Health, appearance, food, getting people to do what you want.... All these "types" of manifestations are easy bc they are all the same!! There is only one way to get what you want and that is by accepting you have it. period.

This is amazing and I'm so proud of you babe!!!

[coolingrosa]

Need some help cuz im writing something and idk how to write Geno. Could u tell me how you write him or some tips and how he is diff from classic??? I tried writing him and he just acts like some random dude

Also hot take: Geno x Dream (btw what would be a good ship name for them)

Hey! Geno as a character is a lot more bitter and manipulative than Sans. He’s confident only because he has no reason for being shy and embarrassed when he’s lost so much hope and respect for himself. He knows he’s a “bad person”, and yet still manipulates people anyways b/c he sees no redemption for himself (pulled from his source.)

How I write the guy: I usually write Geno in ships or post save screen, when he got his happy ending and he’s on the surface. In those scenarios, I write GENO to be a lot quieter than Sans and kinda just observing everything. He doesn’t really give his input on a lot because he subconsciously doesn’t believe he’s allowed to after what he’s done (this only extends to his FAMILY. I see him the absolute opposite in relationships. Slightly emotionally abusive in those, but I purposefully pair him with characters who are equally toxic that they end up just balancing each other out. Nightmare being an example.) With strangers, I see him as closed off and very fake. Because he’s so observant, he will clock you a lot quicker than Classic, and will only step in if you interfere with his happy ending. He’s fiercely protective and will lose his goddamn MIND if one of his friends/ family gets hurt (this includes Frisk EXTRA bc he does NOT want them to ever reset). He’s kinda like Error but quiet and reserved, only being kind and soft with those he cares for and then dry and blunt to everyone else. He’s passive towards children of course, but if you’re an adult, he will full on ignore you with a blank face and hide behind Papyrus while on his phone or shove Frisk in front of him to do the talking. Because of this, he DOES tend to cling in his own way. Not because he doesn’t wanna be alone or he’s scared of losing someone, but because he does not want to deal with social situations on his own. He will not leave the house or his lab to go to the store unless he has someone that will walk with him.

When he IS forced into a position where he has to talk, he’s dry and keeps up the fakest smile ever. His laugh is literally robotic and he’s a master at making anyone around him uncomfortable enough to leave the convo on their own with how closed off he is. He, again, has no shame and will go on his phone while talking to you with one worded responses. He’s not a fun guy to try to talk to, and he doesn’t have many friends outside of his family and the monsters he knew prior bc of this. Goodluck even trying to FLIRT with him. He will never be interested. You’d have to be in the WORK.

However, in Roseverse, he doesn’t get his happy ending, so I’ll try to pull from that experience. In RoseVerse, Geno was forced into the God of Limbo role after Reaper was desperate to keep him from dying when he attempted to leave the save screen, so he’s a lot more bitter and cruel to everyone, even those he cares for. The only expeditions are Error and Fresh since Fate and Destiny attempt to shove them into a brotherly dynamic, and he pities the two bc all three are very uncomfortable with this situation. He’s kind to Error and patient with Error, but even then, he’s pretty quiet and isn’t one to smile. I think he’d act like this in the Save Screen too, minus with his interactions with Frisk where he does act kindly to them (both to manipulate them, but also bc he does have a soft spot for them)

Geno with a child or in a family dynamic would be a lot softer. In BlackCoffeeVerse, Geno and Nightmare DO have a child named Haze who he’s very gentle with. GENO is rude and blunt towards Nightmare (they love each other I swear nightmare just needs someone to put him in his place) but very soft and sweet to his child. I think any child that comes from him or is under his care would be the expecting to his rudeness and manipulative tendencies. He’d see them as all the remaining good in him, and would be determined to protect them and shield them from everything- including his own cruelty.

I’ve seen a bit of GENO and Dream flying around and I think it has so much potential! I think a good ship name for them would be Ichor, which is the golden blood of gods!

[aprillikesthings]

So I took a little bigger bite of gummy than usual and THEN Daci insisted we watch like a half hour of tiktoks together that they'd saved (lol 90% of them were Arcane jokes, including King Princess repeatedly being a troll) so by the time I got in the shower I was already feeling it. So if my typing or sentences get weird or bad you know why

This is one of those episodes I've literally only watched twice tbh

oh hey it's my tumblr background (on desktop)

I forget why they were sleeping outside lol it doesn't matter

But Glimmer's right the person who snores loudest is always the one to fall asleep first

okay so when Adora first sees the sword and tells Catra she's like "are you brain damaged???" Adora tells Glimmer "I thought I saw something" and Glimmer's like "pssht whatever" can people stop dismissing Adora seeing shit lol (edit: foreshadowing. right.)

oh right Im watching this for Castaspella in my 60's fic lol

"I've never relaxed in my life" lol we know

I know she's not the focus of this episode I'm just happy to see her heyyyy bb

(also has anyone watched bits of this show so many times they can pick out the styles of specific storyboarders/animators? not that I know their names, but like "whomever did this scene did this other scene." anyway whomever did a few random bits of this episode worked on parts of Moment of Truth)

ALSO ahahah I caught the moment she reacts to Adora's name

...I need to learn how to edit vids, I still want to make one of every time one of them reacts to the other's name/voice, bc once you notice that they do it every time, you can't UNnotice

Catra: ugggh another Adora mission, fine, when do I leave? (like girl you are acting so reluctant but ahahah)

Shadow Weaver: Nope, I'm gonna do it myself. Clearly, no one else can be trusted to bring her back to the Horde, least of all you!

Man SW realllllly loves to rub into Catra's face that her attempts at getting Adora back haven't worked, that's gotta sting

SW's voice actor was so good

SW: creates a terrifying monster

Catra:

is terrified

writing her as a hippie/shop owner who is also a bit new-agey and ALSO, a wine aunt, is gonna be so funny and fun okay

"Oh, Light Spinner, she's just a scary tale for children" I mean....she does...scare children...

Adora has ADHD. Also Aimee had fun recording this I bet lol

Bow: sounds like this Shadow Weaver really did a number on you growing up

Anyone else reminded of the first time they told a story from their childhood and the other person reacted with horror? anyway

lol I remembered that SW pretended to be other people and taunted Adora in Catra's voice but I didn't remember when so I still fucking JUMPED when she did the "Hey, Adora"

TBH this episode's plot is half "so SW is an abusive piece of shit, and Adora and her friends are starting to realize this"

Gahhh the bit of SW talking with Catra's voice and saying "SW controls us both, she always has" is so fucking creepy. Bc she's acknowledging she's, well, controlling.

oh hey did you know that Hordak's voice actor also did Kino (Mel's brother) in Arcane

SW pretending to be Glimmer and Bow and being a huge asshole to Adora is hard to watch ahhh

The only thing worse is watching her do the extremely typical abuser speech, but ...the kind a partner usually gives, not a parent! "they don't understand you, only I do, your friends don't really like you, they're just using you, you can only trust me"

gyahhhhh

y'know....I just realized. She knew Catra and Adora were close. She blames Catra to some extent for Adora leaving. She has Catra try to get her back multiple times and fail.

Which means at this point she thinks their friendship was entirely one-sided. Like, she could've used Catra's voice to beg her to come home, and she didn't.

I hope for every abused kid to have this moment

"this is what SW does. She manipulates people, she pushes them apart." yeah

lol I couldn't get one where she wasn't making a weird face bc she's talking but eheheh

"If you want to take down Adora, you have to go for the heart." She's looking at Bow through that spying bowl but....CATRA. she misses YOU. she cares about them but she also cares about you :(

also THE HEART YOU SAY???? (was this intentional foreshadowing)

the next episode is Princess Prom, but I'm not watching that one tonight

As it is. I know social media is a minefield atm. Anyone who started watching the last three eps of Arcane the moment it dropped is done.

What's funny is that I intentionally spoiled myself for the last season of She-Ra because I knew I wouldn't be able to watch it for a few DAYS

but Arcane we're watching tomorrow, and I want to know SO BAD whether or not they fuck, but I want to find out when Daci does, via watching it!!!

So don't tell me anything.

Can’t wait to engage in one of my fave midnight hobbies: get high as balls and rewatch bits of She-Ra and sometimes post screenshots with overemotional/horny captions

[howmanyholesinswisscheese]

i think there's a parallel to be said about sylvie and ravonna, both either loki or mobius' previous close-female-friend/love interest, pushing them away and FORCING THEM TO FIND SOLACE AND COMPANIONSHIP IN EACH OTHER. like. i cannot be the only one seeing this.

sylvie, the one person loki believed might understand him, someone he probably loved/loves (as gross as that was, it was canon), tells him she doesn't ever want to see him again, refuses to help him, straight up tells him to go away and get out of her life.

ravonna, mobius' one and only friend throughout his (post-memory-wipe) life in the TVA, someone he probably loved platonically seeing how long they spent together, tells him she can't trust him, refuses to help him, straight up tried to kill him and likely would again.

the ones they once trusted, the ones they would have gone to for help and teamwork when faced with a word-ending threat, don't want anything to do with them. and, in mobius' case at least, that feeling is mutual.

so it makes sense that, automatically, loki and mobius chose each other. time and time again. their respective partners-in-world-saving have gone absolutely savage at them, so they find companionship and alliance in each other and work together. their relationship has developed so much because of this -- because the only person who will help them is the other. there is barely a moment on screen when one isn't seen without the other close by. they are becoming closer and closer, and their friendship is being delved into far deeper than the previous season when they were all hung up with their respective “allies” and apart half the time.

if i wasn't well-versed in disney's queerbaiting history, i would say this is the perfect setup for a love story.

actually, i'll say it anyways.

this is the perfect setup for a love story.

[slymanner]

hurt my heart why dontcha.

[inkskinned]

crows use tools and like to slide down snowy hills. today we saw a goose with a hurt foot who was kept safe by his flock - before taking off, they waited for him to catch up. there are colors only butterflies see. reindeer are matriarchical. cows have best friends and 4 stomachs and like jazz music. i watched a video recently of an octopus making himself a door out of a coconut shell.

i am a little soft, okay. but sometimes i can't talk either. the world is like fractal light to me, and passes through my skin in tendrils. i feel certain small things like a catapult; i skirt around the big things and somehow arrive in crisis without ever realizing i'm in pain.

in 5th grade we read The Curious Incident of the Dog In The Night-time, which is about a young autistic boy. it is how they introduced us to empathy about neurotypes, which was well-timed: around 10 years old was when i started having my life fully ruined by symptoms. people started noticing.

i wonder if birds can tell if another bird is odd. like the phrase odd duck. i have to believe that all odd ducks are still very much loved by the other normal ducks. i have to believe that, or i will cry.

i remember my 5th grade teacher holding the curious incident up, dazzled by the language written by someone who is neurotypical. my teacher said: "sometimes i want to cut open their mind to know exactly how autistics are thinking. it's just so different! they must see the world so strangely!" later, at 22, in my education classes, we were taught to say a person with autism or a person on the spectrum or neurodivergent. i actually personally kind of like person-first language - it implies the other person is trying to protect me from myself. i know they had to teach themselves that pattern of speech, is all, and it shows they're at least trying. and i was a person first, even if i wasn't good at it.

plants learn information. they must encode data somehow, but where would they store it? when you cut open a sapling, you cannot find the how they think - if they "think" at all. they learn, but do not think. i want to paint that process - i think it would be mostly purple and blue.

the book was not about me, it was about a young boy. his life was patterned into a different set of categories. he did not cry about the tag on his shirt. i remember reading it and saying to myself: i am wrong, and broken, but it isn't in this way. something else is wrong with me instead. later, in that same person-first education class, my teacher would bring up the curious incident and mention that it is now widely panned as being inaccurate and stereotypical. she frowned and said we might not know how a person with autism thinks, but it is unlikely to be expressed in that way. this book was written with the best intentions by a special-ed teacher, but there's some debate as to if somebody who was on the spectrum would be even able to write something like this.

we might not understand it, but crows and ravens have developed their own language. this is also true of whales, dolphins, and many other species. i do not know how a crow thinks, but we do know they can problem solve. (is "thinking" equal to "problem solving"? or is "thinking" data processing? data management?) i do not know how my dog thinks, either, but we "talk" all the same - i know what he is asking for, even if he only asks once.

i am not a dolphin or reindeer or a dog in the nighttime, but i am an odd duck. in the ugly duckling, she grows up and comes home and is beautiful and finds her soulmate. all that ugliness she experienced lives in downy feathers inside of her, staining everything a muted grey. she is beautiful eventually, though, so she is loved. they do not want to cut her open to see how she thinks.

a while ago i got into an argument with a classmate about that weird sia music video about autism. my classmate said she thought it was good to raise awareness. i told her they should have just hired someone else to do it. she said it's not fair to an autistic person to expect them to be able to handle that kind of a thing.

today i saw a goose, and he was limping. i want to be loved like a flock loves a wounded creature: the phrase taken under a wing. which is to say i have always known i am not normal. desperate, mewling - i want to be loved beyond words.

loved beyond thinking.