#tell me if you want more stuff about this au
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ellecdc · 2 days ago
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Hi Elle! I'm here to hibernate, and I was thinking maybe a poly!rosekiller (you've got me hooked on Barty and Evan) or whatever pairing you think works best, love all our boys, with either:
“they’ve slept for like twelve straight hours. should i be worried?"
Or
“hey, i think it’s time to go to bed.”
Because I am both. Chronically.
If you don't respond it's totally cool, you're such an amazing writer and so many people love your stuff I totally understand not being able to respond, lovely girl!
P.S remember to drink water :)
thanks so much for the prompt, doll!! and thanks for being here with me; I'm happy to be celebrating with you <3
the winter games
poly!rosekiller x fem!reader who's asleep and Barty's afraid of [702 words]
CW: immature boyfriends, muggle/modern au, Barty hit someone with his car but it was chill and also not pictured, mentions of dicks but not described
Evan swore his eyes were beginning to cross when his paperwork was interrupted by the sound of a hastily whispered “Rosie!” 
Evan looked up to see Barty standing in the doorway to his office. Well, it was more like to see Barty’s shoulders and head floating about halfway up the door frame as he leaned around it without actually stepping in. 
“What is it, bee?” He drawled as he turned back towards his work.
“I need help.”
“With what?” 
“Hiding a body.” Barty deadpanned. 
Evan let out a tired sigh and looked up at him. “Again, Barty?” 
“With Y/N, Rosie! And for the last time, that cyclist I hit was fine; he bounced right back up and smacked the hood of my car. He certainly wasn’t too hurt to cuss at me.” 
“What’s wrong with your Treasure?” Evan asked - diverting yet another grumbling at how inconvenient hitting another man with his car was for Barty - as he organized his sheets into a neat stack. He may have called you Barty’s Treasure, but you were his sugar, and Barty seemed to think you needed his help so Evan was inclined to help you. 
“She’s asleep.” Barty said simply - troublesome cyclists forgotten - causing Evan to pause.
“I hardly see what the problem with that is, Barty.”
Barty stomped his foot and rolled his eyes as if it were Evan who was being rather meddlesome and vague. “She’s asleep in the kitchen.”
Oh…that was the problem. 
Sure enough, covered in an array of flour, sprinkles, and icing, you were resting your head on one folded arm with a piping bag sitting dejectedly in your opposite hand; a small stream of red icing pooling out the bottom. Sound asleep. 
You’d refused Barty’s help earlier in the evening, stating that he wouldn’t do as good a job and you wanted your holiday cookies to be perfect. Evan didn’t particularly blame you for that, but he did feel rather guilty that you couldn’t trust your boyfriend to not pipe dicks on all of your sugar cookies when your back was turned. 
“You didn’t want to wake her up?” Evan surmised as he gently took the piping bag from your hand. 
“Listen, I love her with my entire being, but I’m kind of afraid of her.”
Evan couldn’t help but huff a laugh at that. “Fine, can you clean this up then?” He asked, gesturing vaguely to the state of the kitchen as he came up behind you and leaned over your frame. 
“Sugar.” He murmured as he gently rubbed at your shoulders. “Come on, doll.”
An incoherent sound of discontent escaped your lips as you tried to rise; Evan’s weight above you kept you from sitting up too quickly. 
“Hey, I think it’s time for bed.”
“But, th’cookies-”
“Will be here in the morning.” Evan argued as he allowed you to sit up slowly. “Barty’ll even help you with them.”
“No he can’t, Ev. He’ll ruin them.”
“He will not because whilst he’s helping you, I will be supervising Barty.”
He felt something warm in his chest as he watched you struggle to wake up; brain working overtime to make sense of your surroundings and to make sense of what Evan was trying to tell you. 
“We’ll get it done in the morning, yeah? Together.” He offered gently.
“Yeah…” You let out with a sigh after a beat, Barty letting out a sigh of relief of his own from behind him. 
“Go get in your pyjamas, pretty girl.” Evan instructed as he helped you stand, pressing a kiss to your hair and patting your hip in dismissal before watching you plod off in the direction of the bedroom.
“Ev, can’t I just-”
“No.”
“Just one.”
“I said no, Bee.” Evan pressed more forcefully. 
“I hardly see what the issue with one festive dick is.” Barty grumbled as the two of them followed you towards the bedroom. “What if I save that one and then we give it to Reg?” 
That gave Evan pause. 
“One.”
“Thank you!”
“What’s happening?” Your voice sounded from somewhere in the washroom, causing both boys to freeze outside of it.
“Nothing.” They chorused; one of them in the form of a question and the other in the form of a delighted cheer.
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redroomreflections · 2 days ago
Text
Something With Sea Turtles
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Natasha Romanoff x fem!reader
A Family Of Her Own AU
(Natasha has a secret family)
Summary: Pregnant R and Natasha loves on her.
Natasha is good at many things. Intimidating bad guys, disappearing without a trace, dismantling a firearm in seconds. Painting walls? Well, that’s a skill she’s still figuring out.
She had insisted on painting the nursery walls for the arrival of your little one in a few months. It was supposed to be a nice bonding experience. But, as with most things involving the two of you, it had quickly turned into a bit of a disaster.
"You said this would be easy," You teased from your spot on the floor, perched on a pile of cushions Natasha had painstakingly arranged for your comfort. Your hand rested on your growing belly as you watched her, amusement tugging at the corners of your mouth.
Natasha stood on a step stool, paint roller in hand, squinting at the wall. She was trying her best to create a soft, underwater gradient—blues and greens swirling together like an aquarium, the perfect theme for your baby’s nursery. But the brush strokes were uneven, and there was a smudge where she got a little overzealous with the darker blue.
"It is easy," she replied, her tone stubborn. "I’m just… experimenting with technique."
"Right," You muttered to yourself. "We could just hire someone."
"No!" She exclaimed, then, more gently: "No. I want to do this."
And, honestly, she did. The baby wasn't a shock by any means. Natasha had been dreaming about this day since the first time she fell in love with you. She had planned every detail down to the color of the paint, but when it came time to do the actual painting, she wanted nothing more than to do it herself.
"I know, but we don't even know if our baby will like water or animals..." You reached into your lap to open a bag of chips. "What if they hate all this ocean stuff?"
"If our baby hates all of this ocean stuff, then we'll just paint over it," Natasha lowered her paintbrush to glance back at you. "When did you become such a pessimist?"
"It's called being realistic."
Natasha huffed and dipped the roller in the pan, then continued her work.
"You're supposed to be relaxing."
"I can't relax when I have paint splattered all over my clothes," You gestured to the splotches of green and blue across your sweatshirt. "I'll never get these stains out."
Natasha glanced over her shoulder at you and smiled softly.
"Well, if you remove your clothes, I promise I'll be gentle."
"You're a dork," You chuckled. "And I'm not stripping in front of the baby."
"The baby's not even born yet."
"Still."
"Fine, then how about I strip for you," Natasha wiggled her hips and hummed playfully. "How's that for relaxation?"
"Tempting, but maybe you should finish the wall before we do anything else," You said. You looked down at the sweater to tug it over your belly. It seemed a bit tight these days. "Do you think I'm getting too big for this?"
"Your shirt?"
"Yeah, I mean... I feel like my stomach is stretching the fabric."
"Hmmm," Natasha mused. "Well, I'd say it looks pretty good."
"Good?"
"Perfect," She smiled to herself. "Absolutely perfect."
"Oh, yeah?"
"Of course."
"You're not lying to me right?" You tilted your head.
"When have I ever lied to you, Y/n?"
"A bunch of times actually," You raised a brow. "I was your superior."
"That doesn't count. Besides, it's my job."
"Your job is to tell me the truth," You sighed. "Do my boobs look too huge?"
"What? No!" She turned on the stool, her brows furrowed in confusion.
"But I've grown a size," You frowned, running a hand over your breasts. "You should be telling me to cover up."
"Are you crazy?" She asked, her eyes wide. "Y/n, you're carrying our child; I think you're allowed to dress comfortably. Also, I'm not complaining about your breast size."
"Yeah, but—"
"Listen," She set the paint roller down and stepped off the stool, "You're beautiful. Okay? And your tits are a part of that. You know, they're like an extra gift from the universe."
"Extra gift?"
"Like I'm already grateful for our baby," She said. "But then, your boobs get bigger, and, you know, I'm a very appreciative person."
"You won't be able to touch them for a while," You reminded her.
"I'm willing to wait."
"And I'm going to have stretch marks."
"So?"
"And my stomach will look weird and puffy," You sighed. "I mean, it's not going to go away."
"I don't care," she said. "Y/n, none of that matters. You're giving us a baby."
You were about to make a joke about how much it would probably hurt to push something the size of a melon out of your vagina, but when you saw the look in her eyes, your smile faded. She was so earnest, and suddenly, you felt guilty for not appreciating everything she was saying.
"Sorry," You said.
"For what?"
"Not listening to you," You shrugged.
"Don't apologize," Natasha walked toward you, then knelt beside your spot on the pillows. "I get it. There are days when I feel like I'm losing my mind. But, no matter what, you'll always be my favorite thing to look at."
"Nat," You grinned.
"Seriously," She smiled back. "And I'm gonna tell you that every single day until the end of time."
"Well, you'll be busy painting."
"Then, I'll paint it on the wall," She winked.
"God, I love you," You murmured, leaning forward to kiss her.
"Love you too," She replied, her breath warm against your lips. "Both of you."
"Now, go back to painting before you ruin it." You gestured. "I can kind of see the vision for the whale."
"See? That's what I'm talking about. I'm making art."
"Do you mind taking a breath to come rub this on my belly?" You gestured to the container of cocoa butter next to you.
"Of course," Natasha grabbed the tube, and unscrewed the cap. Then, she squeezed a generous amount onto her palm and set the bottle aside.
"You know," She began, "what you said earlier. I hope you don't believe that about yourself. That I won't find you attractive."
"No, I don't, not really," You shrugged. "It's just hard sometimes. My brain goes all crazy and my hormones are making me all weepy. But, I have you. And, you're not going anywhere, right?"
"Of course not."
"Good," You murmured. "'Cause I don't think I'd last long without you."
"Don't say that," She said, her voice quiet.
"Sorry."
"Stop apologizing," She scolded. "You'll be fine. I'll be fine. Everything will be fine. Now, can we focus on the positive? Like, for example, the fact that you're pregnant."
"I am pregnant."
"You are." She rested her hands on your belly. She began to rub the cocoa butter in circular motions against your skin. "You look so good like this."
"Really?"
"Yeah," She smiled, looking down at her hands pressing against the curve of your abdomen. She was so gentle with the bump. "This is exactly what I always imagined."
"What did you imagine?"
"A cute wife who was carrying my child," She smirked. "I guess I've always had a fantasy about having a family of my own."
"Well, you're living the dream." You grinned at her. For a second there wasn't much talking until you felt a slight movement inside of you. "She's awake."
"Really?" Natasha looked down.
"Yeah," You said. "Can you feel her?"
"Um, well," Natasha hesitated. "I mean, not really."
"Here," You reached down and took her hand, guiding it a bit further up your belly. "There. Do you feel that?"
"I—" Natasha paused, and then, she felt it, a faint movement against her hand. "Yeah?"
"Whenever you're near she gets to moving," You point out. "I think she recognizes your voice already."
A soft, surprised laugh escaped Natasha’s lips as she watched her hand rest against your belly, her expression melting into something softer than usual. She didn't pull her hand away. Instead, she let it linger, her thumb tracing circles on your skin.
"I think she’s already got me wrapped around her finger," she murmured, her voice full of affection and wonder. "Just like her mother."
"That's how it starts."
"Oh, is that a warning?"
"Yes."
"I wouldn't have it any other way." She leaned forward to kiss your belly. Then, she rested her cheek against your skin. "I couldn't be any happier than in this moment."
"That's good," You brushed her hair from her forehead, stroking her scalp gently. "But, just so you know, when I'm back on my feet, I'm kicking your ass for making me paint a sea turtle."
"Hey," she said, her tone playful. "You're the one who agreed to help."
"I regret everything."
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flowersdiceandlove · 11 hours ago
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Please tell me about your Eminence in Shadow!SY AU, that sounds really interesting and badass
Okay, so, in case you don’t know “Eminence in Shadow” is a reincarnation, isekai anime where a guy named Cid Kageno ends up in a world with magic. He likes playing as “Background Character A” by day and being “The Eminence in Shadow” by night. I was watching this anime and while I was watching, I felt like Cid and Shen Yuan were a lot alike. (I’ve only watched the anime which only has two seasons, so anything beyond that in the manga I have no idea about)
Now, onto the idea (I og had this written out as a prompt and then thought, huh, this might actually be fun to write, so just…didn’t post the prompt. I think I’ll come back later and post an actual prompt for this though. But, I'm literally just copy/pasting what I already wrote for this.)
Imagine, Shen Yuan transmigrates into Background Character A in PIDW, and, just like Cid, throws himself into the role. He just wants to get through the plot without drawing attention to himself so he can avoid Bingge's ire. But! But! This is Shen Yuan who has always dreamed of transmigrating into this type of story. How can he just pass up the chance of becoming a cool cultivator??? He can't, that's how! So then, how does one remain Background Character A while also being a Mysterious And Cool Cultivator? By acting out his role as Background Character A during the day and growing his power to become a cool cultivator in secret! That's how!
He'll spend his days idling and playing his role as Just Some Guy to perfection, but in secret, he'll hone his cultivator abilities, slay monsters, study demonic beasts, and live out his cultivator fantasy! He transmigrates early, maybe as a baby, and uses all his knowledge of reading PIDW and other cultivation stories to work out how to cultivate in secret. He won't interfere with the plot, making sure he blends into the background so as not to draw attention to himself, and will be able to survive the merging of the realms with his cultivation abilities when that time eventually comes.
But, of course, this is Shen Yuan we're talking about. He stumbles his way into trouble and wifebeams people. He plays up his Mysterious And Cool Cultivator act like Shadow/Cid does and ends up amassing his own Shadow Garden (harem of highly trained women dedicated to Shadow and his cause, for those of you who haven't seen Eminence in Shadow) but the gay xianxia version. We're gonna get Zhuzhi-Lang, Liu Qingge, ect. But, just like Shadow/Cid, Shen Yuan does not realize he has amassed this massive harem who would literally do anything for him and have created an entire clandestine organization (that's really more of an empire) with him as the head. He thinks they're all just Really Good Friends who are helping him live out his Mysterious And Cool Cultivator dreams.
Just like Shadow/Cid bullshits the Cult of Diablo, Shen Yuan is gonna bullshit his own stuff. And, just like with Shadow/Cid's stuff, Shen Yuan's words are gonna turn out to be true. I'm thinking he ends up uncovering all the corruption and drama surrounding the Old Palace Master and Huan Hua Palace. It'll probably end up being a whole big thing and once they start digging, they just find more and more sects, companies, people, etc. involved in this. Part of the corruption and wrong-doings they find, is a lot of provoking of demons. Shen Yuan, of course, knows none of this, and always ends up on the outskirts of the investigations bullshitting some Wise Nonsense that has everyone in awe before kicking the Bad Guy's butt, not knowing what's Really Going On.
He remains oblivious to all the Drama going on and what he's leaving in his wake. One thing he is absolutely certain he must do is Keep A Low Profile and remain Background Character A, so all his Mysterious And Cool Cultivator adventures are done in secret and he makes sure that his version of Shadow Garden knows that This Is SECRET!! Do Not Tell. shhhh.
Just like in Eminence in Shadow, Shen Yuan's harem (that he still doesn't know is his harem) venture out on their own to gather more people to add to the harem join their cause.
Shen Yuan had to have met Liu Qingge before he entered CQMS. Maybe Shen Yuan's Background Family is from the same village/city the Liu Family is from and so they grew up in the same social circle. When Liu Qingge eventually goes to join CQMS Shen Yuan sighs and thinks What a good guy, playing with me all this time. Now he's off to be a Great Cultivator himself. I hope we can still see each other again sometime. Not at all knowing that Liu Qingge has the BIGGEST crush on him and once in CQMS is trying to recruit more people to join Shen Yuan's harem organization. He probably convinces at least half of the future Qing generation in time as well as many disciples from various peaks. It helps when on a couple night-hunts Shen Yuan, in Mysterious And Cool Cultivator mode, showed up out of nowhere and solved the problem like a Wise Immortal and effectively wifebeaming all present.
For Zhuzhi-Lang, Shen Yuan definitely found him hurt and cooed over him, nursing him back to health. Eventually Zhuzhi-Lang had to return to the Demon Realm and Tianlang-jun, but tells Tianlang-jun about the Nice Human Cultivator who took care of him. Tianlang-jun clocks Zhuzhi-Lang's crush immediately, and tells him that he can go woo his human all he wants as long as it doesn't interfere with work, and also, he would like to meet this human.
Shen Yuan nearly has a heart attack when the DEMON EMPEROR (and Luo Binghe's father!! Ahhh!) shows up at his house to invite him to a picnic (thankfully no one else saw this so his cover as Background Character A is still in check). He doesn't turn him down though, that would be stupid, Tianlang-jun could kill him in a heartbeat if he offended him. So, he goes on the picnic. Tianlang-jun thanks him for taking such good care of his nephew, and Zhuzhi-Lang is a blushing mess the entire time. Tianlang-jun as being Tianlang-jun keeps trying to set Shen Yuan and Zhuzhi-lang up. Shen Yuan laughs it off. Clearly Tianlang-jun is quite the jokester and eternally flamboyant (and you know how Tianlang-jun is), and thinks all his suggestive comments are just his weird sense of humor. Tianglang-jun is most definitely trying to get both Zhuzhi-Lang and himself into Shen Yuan's pants. Shen Yuan is, of course, oblivious to this.
After the picnic Tianlang-jun and Zhuzhi-Lang leave but have secured invitation from Shen Yuan to return as they please so long as they keep it hush hush. Zhuzhi-Lang will actually visit a lot and spend a lot of time in tiny snake form curled up around Shen Yuan's arm under his sleeve or in his robes. Shen Yuan idly pets and strokes him, feeling the cool texture of his scales without thinking about it. When he does realize, Zhuzhi-Lang tells him that it's fine and he can keep petting him as much as he wants. Sometimes people will see Shen Yuan, Background Character A, with a green snake on his arm, or in his robes, or draped across his shoulders, but never really think too much about it, thinking he just has a normal pet snake.
Since this initial meeting, there are a lot more snakes around the Shen Estate, and Shen Yuan's parents tell him to get it under control, thinking that his pet snake is attracting them. Shen Yuan apologizes and says he will. Zhuzhi-Lang then tells his snake underlings to hide better. They were there to make sure Shen Yuan was safe, not get him in trouble.
When Zhuzhi-Lang is back in the Demon Realm he talks about Shen Yuan. He also knows about the Mysterious And Cool Cultivator thing and is also trying to recruit demons to his harem cause. Tianlang-jun knows about this and is fine with it. He's long decided that he's gonna get Shen Yuan into his bed family service and so him having his own underlings and support of demons would only make it easier to do so down the road.
Despite Shen Yuan's meddling, the Tianlang-Jun and Su Xiyan thing still happens and the Old Palace Master stuff leading to Tianlang-jun being sealed. Even with Shen Yuan and his harem friends taking down branches of corruption, they weren't able to take down the Old Palace Master (not yet at least). So, that whole Fiasco happens. Shen Yuan feels guilty about it. Tianlang-jun and Zhuzhi-Lang had become his friends and he knew what was coming. He was confused though because Tianlang-jun did not seem like he was trying to take over the Human Realm and that was why he was sealed. Maybe the System finally decided to pop in and say he couldn't interfere in it, and that some things just had to happen for plot reasons (like with the Endless Abyss). Or, Maybe Shen Yuan didn't see it coming, thinking that he had somehow influenced Tianlang-jun to not want to invade the Human Realm, not knowing that it had always been a lie and set up, the truth never being revealed in PIDW.
Zhuzhi-Lang flees to Shen Yuan, hurt from the attack, and, of course, Shen Yuan accepts him even in his half snake, half humanoid form. It took him a moment, but then he recognized it was Zhuzhi-Lang by his eyes and tended his wounds (again). Zhuzhi-Lang tells him the story of what he and Tianlang-jun believe to be true. By the time he's well enough to do that though, Shen Yuan isn't able to do anything about Su Xiyan's situation. She's already long vanished. Shen Yuan also decides that once Bailu Forest isn't under such careful observation after Tianlang-Jun's sealing, he'll go see the man with Zhuzhi-Lang to see what his state is. Despite it all and Tianlang-jun's...unique personality, Shen Yuan still considers him a friend and wants to help where he can.
It, unfortunately, takes a while for things to cool down around Bailu Mountain and then again to find a way to Tianlang-jun's prison without setting off any alarms. By the time Shen Yuan finally sees Tianlang-jun again, years have passed. He's alive, but not in a great state what with being crushed under a mountain and all. Shen Yuan is in awe of the resilience of Heavenly Demons. When Tianlang-jun sees Shen Yuan he's like "ah, if it's the only human who hasn't betrayed me. What brings you to this place?" all casually. Shen Yuan actually brought him some trashy books and food that he knew Tianlang-jun would like and Tianlang-jun is overjoyed by it. You wouldn't even think he was being squished under a mountain with how happy he was.
Shen Yuan works with Zhuzhi-Lang to figure out how to get Tianlang-jun out, but only after he makes Tianlang-jun promise not to slaughter everyone (probably saying some Wise Nonsense, but is really just trying to get Tianlang-jun to not obliterate humanity). Tianlang-jun pouts, but does. Shen Yuan appeases him by getting him more trashy books and human paraphernalia. During this time, Shen Yuan mentions (intentionally) that he heard rumors that Su Xiyan may be pregnant—Shen Yuan doesn’t think Tianlang-jun’s as interested as he should be in this development; this is Luo Binghe after all—and also that he thinks there’s more to this than they originally thought. Tianlang-jun’s attention is then fully shifted from killing all humans except Shen Yuan, to figuring out what’s going on because hm, you’re right, A-Yuan, this doesn’t make much sense.
With Shen Yuan also working on how to get Tianlang-jun out, Zhuzhi-Lang is able to go back to the Demon Realm to keep things in order. At least to an extent. They keep the fact that they’re trying to free Tianlang-jun a secret bc you never know where there are eyes and ears. Shen Yuan helps Zhuzhi-Lang keep his more humanoid appearance since Tianlang-jun isn’t able to, so that helps Zhuzhi-Lang keep the demons under control, but doesn’t help a whole lot. Things still kinda fall apart there. Shen Yuan’s harem organization is still holding up there and work in secret despite the shakiness in the Demon Realm and the demons in it even use the political uncertainty to their advantage to gain more power.
Maybe Shen Yuan figures out how to make the Sun and Moon Dew Mushroom compatible with demonic qi or maybe he finds another solution. But, either way, he gets Tianlang-jun’s soul out from under the mountain. There is just one caveat of this new body. It must grow from infanthood again at a normal rate. They grow the body, and then Tianlang-jun’s soul pops over to it when it’s a baby, freeing him from his prison. Since the Demon Realm has grown unstable and Tianlang-jun is in a vulnerable state, they decide that the best and safest course of action is for Shen Yuan to keep Tianlang-jun in his care. So, Shen Yuan returns home with baby Tianlang-jun claiming the baby’s his. What better place to hide than in Background Family A, after all? Shen Yuan’s been doing it for decades at this point and thinks it’s the perfect way of living. Thankfully, Tianlang-jun, despite being a baby, does still know how to control his demonic qi, and is able to hide it, making himself appear like a normal human baby.
When the rest of Shen Yuan’s harem Friends find out about “his baby” they’re all seething in jealousy wondering who the mother is. (gender neutral use of the term “mother” here. That harem is definitely trying to figure out how to have Shen Yuan’s baby or get Shen Yuan to have their baby) They also start seething in jealousy over the baby itself bc Shen Yuan is doting on him to the max. He’s holding and rocking him, soothing him, patting him, feeding him, cooing over him, ect. Shen Yuan just can’t get over how cute baby Tianlang-jun is, and is wondering what baby Bingge looked like. (By this point, Binghe’s already entered CQMS)
Every time Liu Qingge leaves the sect to go on a night-hunt, he always stops by the Shen Estate to see Shen Yuan and drop off some monster head/part for him. Shen Yuan always greets him with a smile and thanks him, but asks if dropping the bloody carcass in the entry hall was really necessary. Who’s gonna clean this all up, Liu-didi, hm? Be nicer to the servants! Don’t make unnecessary work for them! The first time Liu Qingge sees the baby, he’s doing this. Shen Yuan comes out to meet him with the baby in his arms, and the sight of Shen Yuan holding a baby, smiling at him, and welcoming him back makes his brain blank for a long moment.
Shen Yuan either is super vague about the baby!Tianlang-jun’s mom or has a super detailed background story ready to go. It’s a bit of a minor scandal in the way that all bastards are, but Background Family Father A is happy to get a grandson from Shen Yuan.
As baby!Tianlang-jun grows up, he gets super smug about having Shen Yuan as his dad and attention. He’s good at playing his role as a little kid around others, but then in private just acts like his usual self, lounging around like the emperor he is, reading scandalous smut, and saying all his suggestive and lucious things. When the members of Shen Yuan’s harem Shen Yuan’s friends show up, he always plays up the act and gets Shen Yuan to let him sit in his lap, pet his hair, snuggle against his side, or something. Shen Yuan’s harem friends swear that the kid knows what he’s doing, but can only chug vinegar in silence bc it’s Shen Yuan’s son. Tianlang-jun is loving having Shen Yuan as his dad, being the only one to call him “daddy” or “baba” or “a-die” or such and has Shen Yuan curled around his finger with his cuteness. (He’s long stopped trying to get into Shen Yuan’s pants and is much happier being his adoptive son. He is still trying to set up Shen Yuan and Zhuzhi-Lang though.)
Because of Shen Yuan’s interference, Liu Qingge either doesn’t have that deadly qi deviation, or is stable enough that when Shen Qingqiu tries to help him with it, is actually able to help. So, Liu Qingge lives.
When Luo Bingge is finally out of the Endless Abyss and is working his way through conquering the Demon Realm, he starts to slowly find out about this vast and secret organization that’s in control of so much. Digging deeper, he’s able to uncover that it spans into the Human Realm and includes some well respected and high class cultivators too. Luo Bingge tries to wriggle out who the leader is, but everyone is so tightlipped and elusive that he’s actually having trouble finding info out. It drives him mad. Xin Mo is also capitalizing on this obsession. Luo Bingge can’t be the indisputable Emperor of all if there’s some shadow organization pulling the strings behind the scenes. Shen Yuan, however, is blissfully unaware that he’s caught the attention of Luo Bingge, still thinking he’s successfully flown under the radar, and tells his harem Friends to avoid getting on Luo Binghe’s bad side and to help him however they can, hoping that this will get those that would have died as canon fodder in Bingge’s rise to greatness to be able to survive it. This just drives Luo Bingge even more up the wall bc he doesn’t know why this secret organization is deciding to back him in everything and so he doesn’t know their motives and so he can’t use those motives to his advantage and so he doesn’t have absolute control! 
When he does finally get a member of the harem organization to talk to him, they just say “Our master is wise. He sees potential in you. Do not squander our master’s good will.” because when they asked why Luo Binghe, Shen Yuan said something like “I believe he’s destined for greatness. I want to see the world he creates.” or “He has great promise. I want to see what he does.” all sage like while internally panicking, hoping that that was vague enough so they don’t continue to ask why he wants to help this random demon that he’s never met. This answer does not help to assuage Bingge’s unease at this secret organization and their secret leader, and only makes it worse bc how does this man know Luo Binghe well enough to know his POTENTIAL!?!?! But he can’t ask the person more bc they vanished from their cell after Luo Bingge was called away on urgent business. And, they also somehow have a way to counteract his blood parasites. Bingge is seriously losing it over this. (He doesn’t know about Zhuzhi-Lang and Tianlang-jun, and I’m sure they both know a lot more about Heavenly Demon abilities and how to counteract them than Bingge does)
Shen Yuan and his harem friends end up leading Bingge through the Demon and Human Realms with mind games and wild goose chases, every adventure leading to Bingge gaining more power. Shen Yuan eventually learns that he’s caught Bingge’s eye and hopes that this all will show that Shen Yuan is a friend and not a foe. See! He’s helping you gain power, Bingge!! We’re not enemies!!
Luo Bingge is not put at ease by this and every encounter with the harem organization is just leaving him more frazzled. Eventually Shen Yuan and Luo Bingge meet on one of these crazy adventures when Shen Yuan had to get involved, Shen Yuan in his Mysterious And Cool Cultivator act, and disguised so that even a Heavenly Demon and the protagonist won’t be able to recognize him. (Zhuzhi-Lang and Tianlang-jun helped him test his disguise out) Shen Yuan spouts more of his Wise Nonsense at Luo Binghe to make Luo Binghe see that they’re on Bingge’s side before vanishing without a trace. After every time, Luo Bingge screams and levels some stuff in frustration. He still doesn’t know what these people are after! How are they so elusive!? 
Because of all this, Luo Binghe’s plans to infiltrate Huan Hua Palace and destroy Cang Qiong Mountain Sect are put on hold. He doesn’t know exactly how far this secret organization's power reaches, but he can’t go in blind with such a big power behind the scenes. He does know that the secret organization has reaches in CQMS, but doesn’t know how deep (Liu Qingge’s been hard at work there and all of Bai Zhan is under Shen Yuan’s command along with over half of the other peaks. Shang Qinghua is freaking out because he didn’t write this!!! Who the fuck is that guy!?!? Why is he rivaling Bingge!?!?! And, WHY IS HE WINNING!?!?!? Bingge’s supposed to reign supreme, not some rando he never even wrote! He’s wondering if he maybe wrote out this idea while high as fuck and delusional with sleep depravation which is why he doesn’t remember it, but he knows he wouldn’t do that even at his most addled bc Bingge is supposed to be unrivaled. That’s why he scrapped the Tianlang-jun vs Bingge idea.) 
Bingge gets so caught up in paranoia over this secret organization and not knowing whose a part of it and who's not and what they really want that he’s not negating Xin Mo with dual cultivation bc are the women part of the organization? Are they in on it? What do they want? What do they gain by sleeping with me? So his control is slipping.
It’s also during this time that the harem organization start getting closer to Huan Hua Palace and the Old Palace Master. Their progress is helped when Shen Yuan, during a friendly get together with one of the high ranking members of his harem organization his Friends, he accidentally slips that he’s wondering the validity of the Old Palace Master’s claims of Tianlang-jun wanting to invade the Human Realm and the story of what’s really going on there. The harem organization takes his words as Shen Yuan telling them to look into this matter, so they set their sights fully on Huan Hua Palace and the Old Palace Master.
Not long later, they uncover the Truth, and clear Tianlang-jun’s name, dragging the Old Palace Master’s through the mud. Tianlang-jun, hearing about this, swoops in and kills a whole bunch of Huan Hua Palace high ranking members and the Old Palace Master along with a bunch of other powerful people involved in the cover up and mess. The organization, at seeing the gruesome slaughter, are at first horrified bc who has this kind of power to slip past the organization's defenses and do this? But, then someone spots Tianlang-jun slipping away, recognizes him as Shen Yuan’s son, and concludes that Shen Yuan was the one to do this. Later, at another friendly get together with Shen Yuan, one of them vaguely mentions the slaughter, subtly asking if Shen Yuan knew of it and even more subtly inquiring if he was the one to do it. Shen Yuan, knowing that Tianlang-jun was the one to do it and just got finished burning the bloody robes Tianlang-jun had come back in after reprimanding him to be more careful what if someone saw you???, doesn’t pick up on this at all and is instead trying to divert attention away from them, says something vague back which only confirms in the organizations mind that Shen Yuan was the one who did it. With their firm belief that Shen Yuan knows what’s best, even if they initially thought the execution was horrific, they believe that they had deserved it if Shen Yuan would resort to such tactics.
The organization sweeps in and helps clean the mess up, CQMS and other sects and businesses affiliated with Shen Yuan and the organization distribute Huan Hua Palace’s wealth and territory, gaining more influence. Luo Binghe hears about all this, and poking around some more, finds that the organization was behind this. The fact that this clandestine organization was able to take down such a well established and reputable sect like Huan Hua Palace only sets him more on edge about them. If they can do that, they could also dethrone him too, couldn’t they?? Just because they haven't outright opposed him yet doesn’t mean they won’t. He cannot trust such a powerful organization.
Eventually, Bingge tracks down Shen Yuan and, in a great show like in Hua Yue City, Shen Yuan has to pull the “self-destruct for you” card to stop Bingge’s qi deviation while saying more Wise And Meaningful Nonsense that has Bingge realizing that this guy was really on his side. This entire time, this guy has had unwavering faith in him and his abilities. This entire time, he’s had his whole organization working to help him in any way possible simply because of that. That this entire time, his only motive was to see what Bingge would become, see the world he creates, and for him to be happy. And now he can’t even do that. Because he’s dead. For Luo Binghe’s sake!!
And, Binghe…
Binghe just can’t take it. He hasn’t had someone so staunchly on his side since his mother died when he was little. He starts bawling. He can’t help it. He hasn’t cried in so long, and he just can’t stop the tears. They just keep coming, a heartbreaking wail from his mouth, while he hugs the dead body to his chest.
Other members of Shen Yuan’s harem organization that watched the whole thing stay standing around this scene, some tears falling from their eyes too, not able to believe that Shen Yuan is really dead. Liu Qingge, and others, are getting ready to fight Luo Binghe for Shen Yuan’s body, but before more fighting can break out, Tianlang-jun struts in with Zhuzhi-Lang following meekly behind him. The harem organization members that don’t know about the truth are shocked and scared bc they were supposed to get Shen Yuan’s son away from this chaos and protect him from Luo Binghe. But, Tianlang-jun (whose like a teenager or something by this point) just ignores everyone’s shouts and deftly evades their protective grabs for him, waking straight up to the still bawling Binghe.
See, Tianlang-jun is not nearly as oblivious as Shen Yuan is—he’s the exact opposite really—so he clocked Luo Binghe starting to fall for Shen Yuan a while ago, captivated by the challenge and mind games that Shen Yuan was playing with him, and is staunchly knowing that Luo Binghe won’t attack them again.
“Luo Binghe, do not fear,” he starts seriously, then breaks out in a massive grin and gives him a thumbs up, “we have contingency plans in case of death! Many of them!” Because of course they do. They’ve long secured the Sun And Moon Dew Mushroom Seeds and started growing them to Shen Yuan’s body. Tianlang-jun also still has access to the Holy Mausoleum and the Resurrection Chamber. And, with both Shen Yuan’s PIDW knowledge and Tianlang-jun’s and with his resources, they have a vast variety of back up bodies and plans for many different circumstances. It is also revealed that this is Tianlang-jun and literally no one is surprised by this development. Of course Shen Yuan’s son is the last Demon Emperor who’s supposed to be sealed under a mountain. It also made some of them “understand” why Shen Yuan had been so ruthless in his execution of the Old Palace Master and others since they now knew he had a personal interest in the matter.
When Shen Yuan wakes up, he’s immediately tackled by a sobbing Luo Binghe who places a big, fat, wet kiss on his mouth. He tries to reel back, but Luo Binghe has him in a death grip, so he can only stare wide-eyed at Luo Binghe until he pulls back to keep sobbing against his chest. Those of the harem organization that were there were furious at this bc barely any of them have kissed Shen Yuan and they’ve been in his harem service longer!! And, instead of shoving Luo Binghe away, Shen Yuan hugs him closer and pats his head, trying to calm him down, whispering that “No, Binghe, I won’t go anywhere. Yes, I can stay with you. Please don’t apologize, Binghe, this isn’t your fault. I should have done better to make you see I was on your side. You’ve done nothing wrong.” and so on.
After this, Shen Yuan is no longer able to maintain his cover as Background Character A, but that’s okay because he only kept it so he wouldn’t get taken out as Bingge’s rival or something. Since Binghe is on his side, he can live his whole life as a Mysterious And Cool Cultivator, living out his transmigration dreams unhindered! But, Binghe, what do you mean you’re making me Empress of the Demon Realm? I’m a man! I can’t be your Empress! Pick a pretty girl for that if you want one! Tianlang-jun, why are you laughing!? Why are you supporting this!?
Binghe convinces Shen Yuan to marry him by presenting it as a political marriage since Shen Yuan is in control of so much, and if he wants Luo Binghe to be the Emperor of it all (which he knows Shen Yuan wants) then they really need to be married and Shen Yuan made Empress for his reign to be undisputed. Shen Yuan eventually figures it out, and by that point he’s also figuring out that he actually has feelings for a lot of his “friends.” Well, it’s a good thing they all want to marry him too.
There are a long line of weddings after this as so many of Shen Yuan’s friends harem demand to be formally married. Binghe fights for position of First Husband. And wins. Because of course he does.
Luo Binghe has pretty much lost interest in his own harem (which was still pretty small and shrinking when he decided to kick women out for fear they were part of the organization), and becomes nonexistent after his marriage to Shen Yuan. It’s not a problem though, because Tianlang-jun, Shen Yuan, and Shang Qinghua pull resources and knowledge to nullify Xin Mo’s effect on him, so his harem is obsolete anyway.
—Later, once things are settled, probably:
SQH: bro, wtf? You haremed my harem novel.
SY: 🤷
I just feel like Shen Yuan and Cid are so similar. They both curate their role in their new transmigration life, bullshit through so much by spouting wise nonsense, and making people fall for them left and right while being totally oblivious. Shen Yuan just gives Cid levels of oblivious vibes.
I’m not super feeling my svsss fics right now, so I don’t think I’m gonna write on them and just close the tabs for now. Idk. I’ll prbly come back to this later at some point, but 🤷‍♀️ Hoped you enjoyed this 😊
If anyone has any ideas for what to call sy's version of Shadow Garden, let me know. I was feeling stuck on that part, but like I said, I don't know when I'll come back to this.
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your-local-squip-fanatic · 3 days ago
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I've decided to reread the BMC book for the Two Squips AU, and since my copy is tied to the Broadway musical, it has an intro by Joe Iconis and Joe Tracz- and I noticed something interesting, as I didn't read the intro before.
When talking about how they had to change stuff, they said this:
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Now, I'm no master theorizer, but that seems to suggest that the SQUIP turned evil... because of what it saw in other people. I'm stating the obvious, yeah, but I REALLY need to talk about this.
I mean, wasn't this what sparked "The Pitiful Children?" The SQUIP had done all it could to improve Jeremy, and came to the conclusion that, since Jeremy has been improved greatly from its efforts, then the real problem is not him but his peers! And it had seen how they all were, seen how mean they could all be, and so it decided to help Jeremy further by trying to take over the school (or all of humanity in Broadway, apparently)
The fact that it's a learning AI explains why it jumped to such a conclusion and made such a drastic plan to kill two birds with one stone.
"So, Astrid, you're just restating facts, what are you saying?" I'm saying my theory. The SQUIP never, not ONCE intended to be evil. It was just simply doing its job to help Jeremy, and went too far in its attempt- it pulled a Phaethon. AKA, it overstepped its place and paid the price. All the SQUIP wanted was for Jeremy to be cool! And powerful! And popular! And to be more chill! But once it set to "save the pitiful children who haven't a clue," everything came crashing down!
...then again this is just what I think, do tell me what you think. I like hearing peoples' takes.
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eclipsejynx · 1 day ago
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i head cannon that he named himself "Midnight" (who is also an OC in a book i'm writing).
he went with it to kinda go with the matching thing he has with Dream, and I feel like both before and after the corruption, he liked the color "midnight blue" because it was a reference to the night sky in his favorite book. he always liked the stars and the sky because of how fascinating it was just an endless void full of stuff that some people didn't even know existed. The name "Midnight" stayed like a nickname for himself, though. Like a name he uses for personal use only instead of telling people. It's similar to a trans name. "Nightmare" is like his dead name, and "Midnight" is his new name, but he's surrounded by "transphobic people" (aka the village), so he has to keep it to himself. I try to make my Nightmare trans-coded because it fits him well in my opinion.
This has two ways it can go after the corruption, depending on how you see Nightmare:
A. Nightmare is the same person, before and after the corruption
After the corruption, he went back to Nightmare as his name because it matched the whole "evil" thing he had going on. I also head cannon that Nightmare forgot most of his previous life after the corruption due to his head and spine being injured very badly to the point that he gained memory loss, leg problems, and very bad mental illnesses (inspired HEAVILY by @signanothername and @mikimakiboo). Focusing on the memory loss, he forgot fragments of his past, including his fake name. He does get his memory back after a few couple decades. They slowly come back in quick flashes that he has to piece together. After he finds his "new name", he usually disregards it. After using Nightmare for a few more decades, it feels wrong to go by Midnight. He often uses Midnight to refer to his past, naive self instead, not wanting to be linked back to his past.
B. Nightmare and the corruption are two separate entities
Going with the more canon! Similar to how some people name them "Passive" or "Night" for original Nightmare and "Corrupted" for the corruption (obviously), "Midnight" refers to the past, dead version, and "Nightmare" is for the new, corrupted version of him. Dream doesn't figure out about this until a few decades after he's broken out of stone. I'm still figuring out the lore, but I want him to find out about it though the gods. This part was inspired by @ancha-aus, so please check them out!
The gods include everyone from a universe called [ REDACTED ]. There's a whole system, but basically, it's a "category" that all the gods fall under. It's like an area where only gods are allowed, so they can all live in harmony (most of the time) to discuss it. If you're familiar with Greek Mythology, it's like Mount Olympus in a way. Except it's a new universe entirely. There, they can take care of a specified place.
Anyways, Dream found out about the place through Reaper, who sensed the unbalance after Nightmare's first clash with Dream. This unbalanced actually signaled all of the gods! So Dream was taken to the new universe and met all of the gods. These gods gave assistance to Dream, especially with how disoriented he was with meeting other gods. There are books with everyone's story in it, written carefully to make sure the story goes perfectly.
Dreamtale was in a special case due to the story being infected by corruption. This corruption is similar to the goop Nightmare has. Dream later realizes all of his past was a lie. The villagers, Nim, everything.
In that book, it also mentions Nightmare's preferred name, "Midnight". Because of this, Dream always uses the term "Midnight" to refer to his actual brother. Because of this, the Star Sanses didn't realize that Nightmare was his brother because of the fake name.
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geez I yapped WAY too much
anyways, credits! (in case you read past)
@signanothername - please notice me I love your rants and your au and head canons are beautiful <3 I would love your feedback, but no pressure!
@mikimakiboo - I love your writing! It's incredible! You're so talented! don't forget to take breaks though. hope I did your disability head canons Justice!
@ancha-aus - I literally inhale your writing it's an unhealthy addiction lol- stay determined!^^
I wonder if passive ever wanted to rename himself (before the apple incident)
Like, Nim legit named them ‘dream’ and ‘bad-dream’. Not only the favoritism (using that loosely cause. nim. Just in general) but the fact he’s been demonized from the start by his own name. Having his twin brother who’s the golden child and loved be the ‘good’ version while he has to be the bad one? That had to hurt, on top of everything else.
His bullies probably used that fact too. “Oh you’re the bad one, it’s literally your name” kind of bs
But then what would he name himself?
Maybe after a character in a book? someone he looked up to/didn’t treat him as badly? maybe even after a plant since he was in nature all the time
Idk. just thinking about the fact passive might have wanted to be named something else, but then when he died and was corrupted Nightmare took on the name as a defining part of himself. It’s his name, it’s what he is so it has to be who he is
And if he was ever reformed/fixed/stopped being evil, would he change it then? Shed the name in order to feel less like the monster he’d been?
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hyperdramas · 1 day ago
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mosquito | lee seokmin
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pairing: lee seokmin x reader
warnings: non-idol au, boyfriend!seokmin, fluff, established relationship, clingy seokmin, pet names (reader uses 'sweetheart' and seokmin uses 'baby' & 'love'), lyr in her soft seokmin hours
now playing: mosquito, pinkpantheress
As you scanned the shelves for a jar of tomato sauce, your phone rang in your pocket, vibrating against your body. Picking it up, you sighed when you saw the name on the screen, answered it, and brought the phone to your ear as you sighed. "Seokmin."
Your boyfriend was known for his clingy nature—all of his friends and your friends knew about his attachment to you, and teased him for it. You couldn't go very far or long without him texting or calling you to ensure you were okay; you thought it was adorable, but in some situations (like this one) it was slightly exasperating.
"I miss you, love. When are you coming home? Where are you?" Seokmin's voice had a pout to it, and you could imagine his face from your spot in the sauce aisle—brown eyes wide with his soft lips jutted out like a child having a tantrum.
"Sweetheart, I'm on my way. I'm shopping for dinner tomorrow and picking up some extra groceries. Just a few more things on my list and I'm done." You reassure him, voice calm as a sigh tumbles through the phone's speakers.
"Please hurry up. Please—I want to see you. It's been almost all day since we've talked face to face," Seokmin wasn't lying either, and your heart clenched at his words: your workplace was busy today, and you didn't get time to call him on your lunch break like usual. It's been hours since you've heard his voice, and now he's calling you every forty-five minutes because of the simple fact.
"I'll hurry up, Seokkie, I promise." You smile, and Seokmin falls silent for a few seconds, humming in response as you start to push the cart and hang up on him.
"No—please don't hang up on me," Seokmin's rich voice is now high-pitched and whiny, and you sigh, tempted to rub your temples as you go to the location of the last item on your list.
"I'll stay with you on the phone, okay? Just don't hang up on me. I want to hear your voice, baby." Seokmin's in his whiny mode, but you sigh nevertheless, agreeing as Seokmin now has a smile in his voice. "Tell me how your day has been."
Listening to Seokmin's words like he's the mature one here, you tell him about your day, detailing everything that went on from beginning to end. Seokmin listened intently, adding comments when he wanted to and complimenting you for how you handled certain situations.
"Well, I've got to check out our groceries now," You sigh, pulling your cart into a checkout aisle. "Do you really have to go now, though?" Seokmin was still persistent—it didn't even really annoy you anymore, you were just so surprised he missed you this bad.
"Seokmin, yes, I do. Call me in five minutes, okay? I'll answer," you promise him. Seokmin falls quiet on the other side of the phone, obviously thinking about the promise you just made to him.
"You better answer. I'm serious." Seokmin's voice is devoid of emotion, highlighting his seriousness. You smile and say goodbye, but it takes about ten extra minutes because Seokmin insists on using every pet name in the book before finally telling you he loves you. Once the call ends, you sigh and begin to quietly unload the cart.
After you finish paying for the goods and take them to the car, your phone buzzes in your pocket, and you pick it up, unsurprised that he was there and waiting for you.
"You're a diligent boyfriend, aren't you?" You chuckle, bundled up as you stuff yourself in three jackets and walk to school with a wet nose and awful cough.
"The very best," Seokmin's voice is soft and sweet, and you giggle at his words, finishing your load up as you crank on the engine and start heading out. "I'm on my way home. I'm gonna see you soon," You smile, and Seokmin cheers on the other side of the phone, obviously ready to see you as his voice raises in pitch.
"I can't wait to have you back in my arms, love. I'll leave you alone while driving, okay? Drive well." Seokmin's goodbye makes your heart flutter, and you speed down the street, ready to give yourself to a selfless boyfriend like he was.
You felt on cloud nine when Seokmin hung up, and you sped down the road even faster, ready to soothe all of your sweet boyfriend's clingy worries and concerns.
feedback is greatly appreciated! let me know how you liked it in a reblog or comment <3
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srirax619 · 2 days ago
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New Chapter of We Got Here Together
Got a snippet of the upcoming chapter of my Trust Falls AU. Hope y'all enjoy. I know it's been a bit. Battling writers block, burnout and general life drama makes it harder.
“Where the Hell were you?!”
Stan was ripped from pleasant childhood memories to the present by the deep boom of his brother’s voice. He looked up to see Ford’s face red and his expression a mix of fury and terror. Ford rushed over to him and quickly inspected him for injuries. 
“Do you have any idea how worried I was? I thought the rift had pulled you in! I thought that I had– I couldn’t find– WHERE THE HELL DID YOU GO?!” Ford was clearly not sure if he was more angry or distraught. 
Oh, Stan thought. That was stupid of me. 
“Hey, no, I was just taking a walk to give you a chance to cool off. I am fine. See?” He gave a big grin and twirled around. “All accounted for. No need to freak out.” Ford’s eyes somehow got even bigger and he shoved his brother’s shoulders roughly.
“Never. Scare. Me. Like. That. Again!” Ford bellowed. Stan put his hands up placatingly, curling his shoulders in on himself in shame. 
“I didn’t mean to worry you, just… was trying to be nice. Won’t happen again.” Stan stared down at his shoes, nudging the ground with the toe of his boot. 
Ford’s mouth opened and closed a few times and then he groaned and threw his hands up. “See that you don’t!” and with that he stomped back to the safety of the camp, glancing over his shoulder now and then to make sure Stan was following. 
Ford sat tinkering with some of the tech as a way to occupy his hands. Stan sat a few feet away, giving him space, and going through the logs on the gauntlet. He glanced up at his brother. “So I saw some cool stuff, you wanna hear about it?” Ford looked over, expression still fierce. 
“Yes…!" Stan had to stifle a chuckle at the anger and curiosity battling in his brother’s voice. 
After explaining what the gauntlet was telling them and showing Ford the holograph of the scanned mushrooms, Stan asked Ford if he remembered the camping trip they took with their Ma and Pa. 
“Oh yea! I had that foraging book and you obtained that sample for me…” Ford looked off into the distance and smiled softly, his previous anger forgotten for the moment. 
“Well, Gauntlet says these were munchdooms, so if we go explore together, no samples for now. Unless the tent is hiding some microscopes and gas masks.” Ford snorted at the old joke and his shoulders finally relaxed.  
“I wonder if that device would classify capsaicin as ‘segura papa soncumir’” Ford thought aloud. Stan groaned. 
“PARA CONSUMIR, Ford. Not Papa. Papas are potatoes. And ‘consumir’ isn’t even that far off from ‘consume’, jeez.” Ford bristled, flushed and glared at his brother. 
“I –” his face got gradually redder, his eyebrows deeper. “Stanley, it’s not as if I ever had any need to learn a language like THAT.” Stan raised an eyebrow, mentally daring his brother to cross the line and say what he actually meant. Their parents had never been terribly open-minded when it came to people of other races. They were furious when Shermie had married a Mexican woman. 
“Like what, Ford?” 
“Like– Like–!” 
“Like your niece and nephew speak with their mother?” Ford’s eyes widened and his face went pale. He had the decency to look ashamed and glowered down at his six-fingered hands.  
“...I didn’t mean it like that.” 
“Glad to hear it.” Stan cleared his throat. He didn’t want to be giving Ford more reason to be upset. He just hated that aspect of Jersey.  “Anyway, if you want more lessons in how to entender Spanish, just ask. I’m happy to share whatever I know. Sorry you don’t have a better teacher, but you’re good at working with what you’ve got.” Stan patted his brother’s shoulder and stood up to head into the tent for the nutrition pills. 
“You hungry?” Stan called from inside the tent, grabbing two pills. 
As he stepped back out, Ford sighed deeply, staring off into the distance. “No, not really.” Stan raised an eyebrow and stepped into his brother’s line of vision, hand on one pushed out hip. 
He put on his squeakiest impression of their Ma. “Stanford Filbrick Pines, I slaved over this hot stove for hours to put this meal together, and you WILL eat every last bite, you hear me, young man? There are people who would kill to have the life you have, and the least you could do is be grateful!” Stan punctuated his speech by flipping his longer hair over his shoulder unnecessarily.
Ford laughed so hard he had to lean back and gestured to Stan to give him the pill. 
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glennquackmire · 8 months ago
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Modern au where the curtis bros run a old fashioned diner that the greasers all work at and the socs run this fancy restaurant across the street and they have a krusty krab chum bucket type rivalry
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I hate this drawing sm you have no idea
Tell me if someone else had this idea before me btw ☝️
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biblically-accurate-dca · 7 months ago
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substitute
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yuwuta · 5 months ago
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gojo would kill your work husband. but if he were the work husband, that's a different story
REAL!! he’s such a hypocrite because if someone mentioned you had a work husband, his entire world would stop and he wold devise the absolute worst plans to make sure that your co-worker, everyone at your job, and everyone in the next building over knew that he was happily committed to you 
but if he is the work husband, he’s very........ dutiful in his role. there’s a loose office/lawyer au in my head where satoru is your secretary, and for all intents and purposes, your personal assistant, and he’s good at his job, but mostly because he considers his job to be pleasing you. he has coffee for you when you arrive, he moves your schedule around without you asking, he has answers to questions before you can even ask them, he has fresh flowers on your desk weekly, pokes into your meetings to pretend to hand you a file that’s really just maybe a single document in a manilla folder with candy on top of it—he’s made himself your business, your partner; he’s made himself irreplaceable, and he loves to remind everybody of that fact. 
he’s also extremely loyal. sure, he could day a week’s worth of work done in about a day, but that doesn’t mean he’ll just use his talents for anybody. he’s your secretary, so he’s at your beck and call, and everyone knows it. they know he’s the best, but also that he’s off limits—not because you won’t share him, but because satoru won’t let himself be shared. 
he also extends his duties beyond work, of course. when he hands you a print out of your schedule for the day and you’re confused by the three-hour block of time you have in the middle of the day, satoru just helps you shrug your coat of your shoulders and smiles, “that’s for the lunch date you have with me, of course!” hanging up your coat in your closet for you, “i’m paying, see you soon, sweets.” and because you’re great at your job, and satoru helps you be great, nobody really questions when the two of you have time for a 13-course tasting menu at 1pm on a tuesday afternoon. and if they did, all satoru would say that you two had a lovely date 
#anonymous#he's like donna from suits but worse because he's like if harvey were donna LOL#i have soooooo much to say about him#he doesn't really Have to work he's a nepotism baby supreme#but he met you maybe in undergrad? and he's been obsessed w you since#he knows youre a workaholic so he's dutifully sat by your side all these years through college through grad/professional school#and when you told him you got to hire your own assistant he was the very first applicant#because getting paid to spend his days with you and take care of you? he was already doing that for free might as well make it official#everyone in the office knows satoru loves you except you honestly#he probably has his own masters/JD but elects to be your assistant anyway bc that's so much more fun#what he Really wants to be a househusband but first he's gotta ask you out and propose and all that good stuff (cue him rolling his eyes#and going on about formalities and boring systems and blah blah blah)#also in the office au in my head: nanami (also senior partner) higuruma ofc <3 beloved (managing partner) and TOJI!#WALK WITH ME!#its honestly probably satoru's influence that gets toji into law... as someone who so feverently broke it in the past#idk maybe there's a megumi situation that makes gojo be like yk if ur this good at skirting/breaking the law youd probably be half decent#at enforcing it... or at least helping other people get around it too#and so lawyer toji is born#does he screw around w the rich people who r stupid w their money? absolutely#but you nanami and higuruma just let it be bc he brings in those settlements better than anybody else....#hmmm... i kinda wanna make megumi somebody's associate but also..... yuuta.....#i think i just like sticking yuuta in a tie if im being real#but anyway... satoru is your Work Husband and everyone knows he wants to be your real husband#but they just let it slide bc rumour has it even tho hes just a secretary hes got equity in the firm?? and besides that his heart eyes give#away his hopeless devotion from a mile away#the day you actually start seeing somebody outside of work... oh theyre in for Trouble#satoru x reader#him dragging you out of ur office late at night and u protesting so he just. puts u over his shoulder#and ur telling him to let u down but he's insisting u go home and then nanami pops out of his office#and ur like wait nanami this isnt what it looks like but he's so dead in the eyes when he just sighs
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soupmanspeaks · 6 months ago
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the topic of Helpy makes me go insane /pos like I have this headcanon that William/Springtrap just, DESPISED Helpy because William took heaps of pride from the Funtime line of Animatronics, he saw it as his son's crude mocking of HIS creations, when in reality its just Michaelangelo S Afton trying to use humor to once again cope with the horrors™️ Like I've probably said this here before but I headcanon that Helpy found his way into the PizzaPlex's marketing is because after the FNAF6 fire he just was under the rubble remarkably preserved or something and instead of going into the RockStarRow Museum, the FazExecs had dollar signs in their eyes and were like "yeah, that one will make us bank, ong" Ive also probably said this (bad memory sozzz) but a headcanon to go in tandem with that headcanon, is that Glamfreddy sighs in resignation whenever he passes by one of those Helpy monitors (he wasn't paid royaltys <//3 ) AND LIKE I GOTTA KNOW WHAT (glam)MIKE WOULD THINK OF THE ENTITY THAT IS SATAN DISGUISING HIMSELF AS AN AGENT OF LIGHT (Helpi) WOULD HE FEEL SAD? ANGRY? AT THE MIMIC? THE COMPANY?! please the topic of helpy is so interesting PLEAs-
#fnaf#michael afton#five nights at freddy’s#glammike#glamrock freddy#helpy#fnaf helpy#fnaf helpi#uhhhh glammike is like in every single one of my Fnaf AUs so uhh#something something the ghost hunters in the pizzaplex somehow see the original helpy figure from the fire in RockRow#it just showed up (but they dont know that shhhh) so they initially pass by it but then like idk their EMF readers spike their so like#they decide to do a spirit box session next to it#uhhhhhhhh idk maybe michael's spirit can just move throughout the PizPlex and it just#idk makes freddy hard shut down#blah blah they get lots of answers they dont have a clue about but stuff the seasoned lore expert knows#yk for that ghost hunting au maybe Michael's spirit just follows the sam and colby wannabe's thru the PizPlex#yk how like conversing with spirits just kind of wakes them and stirs them?#Yeah Michael spent his life and unlife trying to not do that so like#hes trying to be as directly vague as possible (does that make sense lmao) like hes giving them direct answers right#like “yes” “no” but so direct to the point that theyre boring so that they dont want to prod more#what does this have to do with helpy specifically shhhhh let me write my entire AU in the tags#anyways blah blah “freddy why do you like that weird pink and white bear?”#“hes my son gregory! I have to!”#“like...canonically?”#blah blah anyways Helpy baby boy baby Helpy evil#tag rambles! theyre fun lol#tell me if I should just dump the Ghost hunter au in a different post lol im starting to see gears turning lowkey
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emily-mooon · 7 months ago
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Figured I’d share my doodle page of the nordegrim fan kid I made a few days ago for day 2 of nordegrim week
His name is Ernest, he’s five, and he’ll tell you facts about the ocean and the creatures that live there
Close ups ⬇️
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+ bonus me cause man did I go against my own headcanon
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good-beanswrites · 1 year ago
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Lights, Camera, Sing Your Sins Archive 🎥
This is just so I can reference au things and keep details organized lol, I'll edit this post and try to keep it updated
Original Post/fic link
Original Art (by waivyjellyfish)
Extra Thoughts
Song Ask
Song Drabble
Scripted Harm Ask 1
Scripted Harm Ask 2
Scripted Harm Ask 3
Scripted Harm Drabble
Movie Night Ask 1
Movie Night Ask 2
Cover Song Ask 1
Cover Song Ask 2
Misc Thoughts Ask
MV Es Ask
Es/Jailbreak Team Ask 1
Es/Jailbreak Team Ask 2
Kazui Makeup Ask
Kazui Makeup Drabble
Kotoko Thumbnail Drabble
Hair Growth Ask
Yuno fic "Fell and Found Out" (by amugoffandoms)
Order of Attack AU Drabble
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softquietsteadylove · 9 months ago
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Ahhhh second first date! Second first date! Of course i need to know how it goes!!
"And the server was definitely super jealous of me."
Thena laughed again. That was all she'd been doing since they left the house, she was quite sure. Since Gil 'picked her up', that was to say.
It was very sweet. He had showed up at her guest room door, dressed up and with a charming smile, even making an attempt to look nervous. He asked if she was ready, offered his arm; he was the perfect gentleman for their first date.
Her second chance.
Of course she had to know more about their first-first date. And Gil was happy to elucidate her once she insisted enough that telling her that much would not cause her brain to catch fire (as the doctor seemed to have implied in some way).
"But it was a nice dinner, then I walked you back to where you were staying at the end of the beach," he recounted, his eyes completely starry. "I had never gotten to actually have a romantic walk on the beach, before. Total bucket list stuff."
"It sounds lovely," she remarked mildly, without much choice with no memory of it for herself.
"The moon was out and everything, and it looked really pretty with your hair and your white dress, and the shawl thing-y you had on over it." Gil gestured vaguely to simulate the flowing garment she had worn over her bare shoulders. It certainly painted a picture, and she was quite sure she knew what he was referring to, having glimpsed a long white shawl in their closet.
She tried not to laugh too hard, mindful of the gentle atmosphere of the bakery. The tables were really just for people waiting for orders. They didn't have a fancy coffee machine, or an official barista. But Gil did bring out cups of real, boiled hot cocoa from the back--a secret only for their own, of course. They were waiting on their fresh baked pastries to come out and cool.
"I was so distracted by you that I didn't even realise when we were back at your doorstep," he sighed, but his comedic tone faded. He looked at her more softly, leaning his cheek against his hand. "I told you flat out that I was having such a good time I wished you were staying further away."
Thena attempted to laugh into her mug, this time.
"You laughed at it then, too." He sounded more wistful now. "But I told you I was serious and asked if I could see you again. I don't know why you were so surprised."
Probably because she had never been one to be asked out by someone like him. Men, sure, but not very sweet, very funny, very honest gentlemen like Gil. Just...men. She wasn't approachable enough for someone as sweet and charming as Gil.
She still thought that, to a degree.
"But you agreed, and I asked if I could kiss you too," he at least smiled at this part of the story, although his longing for the past remained. "You said I didn't have to ask, which wasn't a yes, but I guessed I was supposed to read between the lines."
Again, the Thena in the story and Thena herself in the present were different people. But she felt her stomach clench faintly at the idea.
"I did kiss you," Gil sighed, returning to his lighter, more jovial tone. "And it totally blew my mind. I mean if I wasn't in love with you already, that would'a done it."
"Gil," she admonished lightly, partly laughing and partly sheepish at the description of this passionate kiss she couldn't remember at all.
"What?" he chuckled before taking a sip of his own hot chocolate. "You wanted to know. And that date changed the rest of my life, sweetheart."
She liked it when he called her that. She nodded, looking down at her mug. "I suppose I did. It's a nice story."
"Yeah," Gil concluded, although his sigh felt a little heavier.
She still didn't have any memories of her own to contribute. But she attempted to jump over that wave of guilt, trying to put a smile back on his handsome face. "What was our second date like?"
He clearly knew what she was trying to do, but he kept quiet about it at least. He pulled himself up in his seat and started his next story. "Well, we were still on vacation. I asked a little more about you, and you at least told me you were an artist, and you were there on leave because you found teaching wasn't really your thing."
Thena winced faintly. She was sure that was an understatement. She did have memories of teaching before moving to their current residence, and none of them made her glad to have them instead of memories of Gil.
"I told you that I had been a boxer in college, and that I was just working some boring office job and also wanted," he paused to shrug and make a face, "a change of scenery."
They were both in the midst of becoming different people when they met. How fascinating, Thena mused. Although she was quite sure Gil had always been sweet and charming and funny. Just a feeling.
"It was actually you, on that date, who asked what I liked to do for fun," he admitted much more quietly. He looked down at the table, picking at a chip in the lacquer. "I told you I liked baking and you said I could try working part time in it, just to see if I liked it enough to make it my job."
"It sounds like something I would suggest," she agreed. It was hard to imagine the man she knew now doing anything else, really. Although it was almost funny to imagine him stuffing those muscles of his into a regular office suit.
"I said I'd give it a try," he chuckled, reaching for her hand. She gave it reflexively, sense memory knowing Gil much better than her own mind. He kissed her knuckle. "And now I have the best job in the world."
She smiled down at their adjoined hands as well, feeling as if the weight of the world were on top of them. "The date, Gil?"
"Right, right," he chuckled, allowing her to move the story away from the more emotional of the topics. "Well, you suggested that, and I asked about your art some more. And since the restaurant looked kind of full, and I didn't think that was your scene, I asked if you wanted to walk along the boardwalk a little first."
"We walked by a bakery there, and you asked me what everything was, since I was 'the expert' and all."
That also sounded like something she would say; Thena attempted not to roll her eyes at herself.
"I pointed out the regular stuff," he shrugged and even looked at the pastry cases in front of them in the moment. "Croissants, cupcakes, they had some tarts. You asked about one in particular."
Thena tilted her head as he paused, but she leaned back as he did, having been so sucked into the story that she didn't even notice Ajak coming over with two small plates.
"Thanks," Gil smiled at the petite woman, obviously familiar with her.
"Thank you," Thena added, keeping her eyes on the woman who only smiled and waved in response. Ajak knew her, Thena was aware, but Gil had been determined that they could meet formally when Thena felt more ready to reintroduce those parts of their life to herself.
"This is called a petit four, just a small cake," he chuckled, turning his own plate so she could admire the little dessert from all sides. "It's pretty old school, but you asked me about it when I pointed it out to you. I bought one so you could sample it, even though you told me not to."
Thena eyed the little dessert. It seemed to be vanilla, small and glazed completely white. There was something on the top of it.
"I add just a little sea salt to mine. Call it a secret ingredient."
It was just a hint of salt, but it sank into the sweetness immediately. Just like on that day five years ago, she had tasted the saltiness of the ocean air around them as she took a bite. She could remember the wind on her skin, and how warm Gil's hand was in contrast. The smell of the little shop and the breeze around them, and Gil's cologne wafting gently over to her.
Thena whipped her head up at him. He blinked at her sudden movement but didn't say anything. He was trying to read the expression on her face.
She didn't have any other memories of it. Just that one moment had jumped out at her as she had tasted that same taste--perhaps an improvement upon it. She could remember Gil's smile as she had told him that she liked it.
"You promised."
"Hm?"
She blinked, trying not to cry over a silly little cake. "You promised you would make me one sometime. I told you I expected it to be better, since you were indeed, 'the expert'."
Gil teared up immediately. Of course he did, the gentle hearted giant. "Y-You-"
She looked down at her cake again, the pressure immediately mounting. "It's just that one moment. I can't remember past that. But-"
Thena startled as he launched from his seat across the tiny cafe table from her. He caught her lips at a funny angle, but they both tasted like chocolate and vanilla and sea salt. Her eyes fluttered.
"Sorry," he chuckled, offering a sheepish grin as he seated himself, ignoring the worried glances of other bakery patrons. "Couldn't help myself."
"Hm," she pursed her lips faintly, and he returned to his cake, unable to keep himself from staring at her. She dabbed at her lips, resisting the urge to fan herself. She still had her coat on, but it felt far too hot now in their little corner by the window. "Whatever happened to asking?"
"You told me I didn't have to ask."
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needlesandnilbogs · 7 months ago
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The worst part about writing long aus is that you can’t infodump about it (without having to explain everything first so they get the context) unless you’re willing to make someone read 150k words
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wolfblood-of-anubis · 10 months ago
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love that in my upcoming au where house of anubis is filled with demigods, a child of the big three coming into this meant-to-be safe place for their kind, immediately is made an enemy by a daughter of ares, and the big three kid will eventually end up with a child of athena
its just so funny to me
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