#teen Agatha be like “i hate kids i will never be a mother!”

[crovvlipso]

They're so silly.

By the way, info about their kiddos!

[gingiesworld]

New Sheriff in Town

Requested by @louxbloom

Wanda Maximoff x GN! Reader/ Past Wanda Maximoff x Vision

Warnings: Angst. Fluff.

18+ MINORS DNI

Wanda and Vision were high school sweethearts, everything seemed perfect until she fell pregnant before graduating. Vision proposed to her as soon as he found out which Wanda had said yes.

It all seemed fairytale like as the years went on, Wanda being the stay at home mom as Vision went to work with his uncle at Stark Industries to provide for his family. As much as Wanda loved being a mom to her sons, she hated being home alone. Living the same day, same routine over and over again.

As the years went on, Vision had started to treat Wanda as a maid and not his wife, the twins soon caught on and started to treat her the same as their father did. As much as it broke Wanda's heart, she couldn't leave. Even though her friend's Natasha and Agatha would tell her otherwise. She had an obligation to be there for her family. That is what she was taught the perfect wife was.

That was until Vision had handed her divorce papers as he packed his things. Leaving her to raise two teen boys as he moved in with the 20 year old twinkie in the city. The twins had blamed Wanda for him leaving and never really cut her any slack. Wanda would also find herself crying herself to sleep every night. Wondering at what point her life had took a turn.

But with two 15 year old boys, running amuck throughout Westview. Especially being just as entitled as their father, always causing noise and destruction wherever they go. Only to be yelled at by Wanda before the two would make her cry.

A new resident had moved in ane joined the local Sheriff's department. Well they were the new Sheriff. When they saw the two yelling at Wanda, blaming her for their father not wanting anything to do with them.

"Hey!" Their voice boomed, causing the three to look in their direction. "I suggest you boys show your mother some respect."

"What are you going to do about it?" Tommy sneered as the twins crossed their arms across their chests.

"If I catch you boys doing anything out of line, I can have you arrested." They told them sternly.

"What? You gonna call the police?" Billy teased as Tommy laughed. They sighed as they got their badge out.

"I am the new Sheriff so I suggest you start to respect your mom." They told the two sternly. "Also, if I catch either of you vandalising any property, that includes your mom's house, I will put you in handcuffs. Do you understand me?" The two just nodded before walking inside as Wanda approached Y/N.

"Thank you. I'm Wanda." She introduced herself.

"Y/N." They shook her hand. "Well it was nice to meet you but I have to get to the station." Wanda waved nervously as she watched them walk away.

As the time went on, Y/N had found Tommy drinking in the park. So they approached him with a soft smile on their face.

"Hey, you're Wanda's son right?" They questioned as Tommy just scoffed before having another big sip. "You know you can talk to me."

"About what?!" Tommy spat. "How my dad left us and we've blamed mom all the time for it. Especially seeing him with his new wife and kid."

"Listen, I understand how hard it can be to have a parent give up on you." They told him. "But your mom is still here. She is still looking after you and your brother. You just need to give her a chance. It isn't her fault your dad quit on you guys. That's all on him so please just cut her some slack. Talk with Billy too. She deserves better than the crap you two have given her."

"I'm sorry." Tommy cried as Y/N put a reassuring hand on his shoulder.

"Save that apology for your mom and do it sober." They told him before standing up. "Come on, I'll give you a ride home." That was the first time that Tommy had felt extremely bad for how he had treated his mom. He hated himself and he hated his dad.

Once Y/N had pulled up outside of the Maximoff residence, Wanda came running out, worry etched onto her features as Y/N helped Tommy out of the car.

"Is he ok?" She asked them as they helped him inside.

"He's just drunk." They told her when they lay him on the sofa to sleep. "He's going to have one killer headache in the morning."

"Thank you." Wanda told them sincerely as she walked them out.

"It's no problem. They have been served a bad hand. The three of you have." Y/N told her softly as she smiled. "I will help keep my eye on them outside of these walls but the rest is on you Maximoff." They told her as she nodded. Watching as they left once more, this time admiring their form in their uniform.

As the time went on, the twins were better than before with Wanda. Doing chores without being asked and even making her drinks.

"I honestly don't know what has happened but it feels like something out of a horror movie." She whispered to Nat as the two stood on the porch, watching the twins mow the lawn and wash the car.

"I know what you mean. It's kind of like an alien invasion." She replied as Wanda nodded. It wasn't until they saw Y/N doing their rounds. Wanda noted that they weren't in their uniform as they stopped and spoke with the twins. "Or maybe a new person has something to do with it." Nat soon noticed how Wanda was silent as she watched Y/N and the boys laugh about something. "You like them." Nat pointed out as Wanda snapped her head in her friend's direction.

"No." She laughed as Nat smirked.

"Yes you do." She told her. "It's ok to want to move on Wanda."

"I know that but the twins have just stopped hating me." She told her. "If I change something it could ruin it."

As the year went on, Wanda had organised a BBQ for the twins birthday. Inviting their friends and family, Y/N had come with some gifts for the twins. Tickets to see their favourite team play the next game. It wasn't until Vision walked inside like he still owned the house.

"Vision? What are you doing here?" Wanda questioned as Vision smirked.

"I came to wish my boys a happy birthday and give them their present." He said as he waved a set of keys in her face.

"Please leave." She spoke shakily as the twins soon noticed the commotion. Y/N's gaze followed theirs as they soon moved to Wanda.

"She said to leave." Tommy stated as he stood beside Wanda.

"You will speak to your father with respect." He spat at him angrily.

"When you see him, let me know." Tommy smirked as Billy held his mom as she cried. All of her anger, pain and sadness coming back ten fold. It was when Vision was about the back hand Tommy across the face Y/N had stepped in.

"I suggest you leave." They told him as they gripped his wrist tightly.

"Fuck you." Vision spat before taking a swing at Tommy with his other hand. Y/N getting in the way and receiving a jab to the jaw.

"I won't ask again." They snarled as they towered over him. "Leave now or I'll have you arrested for trespassing."

"Whatever." He snarled before turning on his heels and leaving the house. Y/N soon got on their phone to a locksmith.

"The locksmith is coming tomorrow." They told Wanda who soon wrapped her arms around them. They were shocked at the action but reciprocated the hug regardless.

"Thank you." Wanda whispered before she kissed their cheek. The party continuing as Vision had never came. The twins barely left Wanda's side as everyone soon started to leave.

"Y/N." Wanda called out before Y/N got into their car.

"Are you ok?" They asked her as she nodded, not expecting her to wrap her arms around their neck and kissed them passionately. Y/N sunk into the kiss as she deepened it. When she pulled away, they watched dumbfounded as she walked back inside. A smile on her lips.

[infinityinakiss]

*agatha all along episode 5 spoilers*

holy shit that was a fucking episode alright

i loved the broom scene so much, whoever thought of that gets a raise.

rio being protective of agatha and her mommy issues I WANNA CRY also even the fact that rio knows any of her trauma implies that they were basically wives, agathario fans keep wining.

rip alice, but also i think she's alive, or at least gonna come back in some way. rio disappeared for some reason y'all and i think it was to deal with alice. with the way that rio was looking at agatha after she drains alice's power, it doesn't make sense that she would just disappear when it was clear that agatha needed her, unless there was something more pressing to deal with. so rio went to talk to alice.

i hope.

oh my god agatha trauma episode. so much to unpack there. the fear she had and the confusion in her eyes. her disbelief towards why her mother would continuously hate her and hurt her, over and over again. she was never able to leave that 18 year old version of herself that her mother tried to execute. then there's nicholas scratch. her son, pleading with her to stop. her mother, and her son, two swords in her heart. one she couldn't get to love her, and one she couldn't stop loving.

did she lie when she said she lost control? i vote no. her power draining thing had always started out as a form of protection, that then evolved in to becoming who her mother always thought she was. in this moment, she's terrified. she saw a rope that was thrown the well and she grabbed it.

now the juicy bit.

"you're so much like your mother" THE WAY I SCREAMED

TEEN YOUR MOM IS SO PROUD RIGHT NOW

IT WAS AMAZING, NO NOTES, BEST WAY TO DO THE WHOLE WICCAN THING IN MY HUMBLE OPINION

i love the lack of lines in the whole scene, and just letting the acting speak for itself. especially because most of the viewers already knew that he was wiccan, i really love that they didn't have agatha completely spell it out for us. i think they're at least a bit aware that this wasn't a twist, just something that was exciting.

the way wanda's magic is just so recognizable. i think joe locke did a pretty good job emulating wanda's fighting style. the fingers were on point.

i was really surprised that agatha wasn't a tiny bit concerned when she found out that teen was the child of the scarlet witch, the very person who decimated her after knowing magic existed for a solid two hours. plus it seems to be implied that she figured out who he was because she recognized his magic. it doesn't make sense that she would taunt a person that she knows has a family history of fucking shit up when they're distressed.

PHENOMENAL SONG CHOICE

i don't think this was an actual trial. i think this the road realizing that this is a coven with too many walls that needed to be broken. and i think it recognized an incredibly powerful witch that needed to figure out who he was. maybe the road thought that a spot for a protection witch needed to open up so that he could fill that space. the way the episode was structured, the way the trial was structured, didn't really line up with the other episodes. so i think agatha's real trial is coming later.

THE HEAD TILT. truly his mother's son.

wanda, come pick up your kid, he's doing something stupid

[hope-you-brought-kneepads-bitch]

Agatha all along spoilers:

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Okay okay okay? Soooooo heyyy Billy erm don’t trust you, anddd actually I think your brother’s better so yeah fuck you actually also how dare you talk to a prolific witch killer like that, if Rio wasn’t busy taking Alice’s body (fly high! RIP girlie, rest with your mum now!) she would’ve taken your ass all the way to the astral plane, dead or alive

Nicolas scratch voice reveal! Poor baby wanting his mama to stop like is he watching all this happening? Poor sweetheart, Agatha just wants her baby back (should’ve also had the camera pan slightly to Rio because bet she would’ve had a reaction too 👀 notes for next time)

Also fuck evenora harkness okay, listen I support all mothers but “I should’ve killed you the moment you left my body” ??? Bit harsh, I’m from the north of England and even mothers here aren’t that cruel

“I can be good” yes sweet angel baby witch killer you can do no wrong and will always be good and I love you and will stroke your hair when you sad and never leave your side -Rio Vidal probably

“Or we could slit her throat”

“Her mother can’t have her!”

Rio you can’t keep flip flopping in front of the other witches, they don’t know your humour yet and how deeply in love with your ex wife you are, they don’t know the throat slitting thing is fun to you as a joke (dw baby I got you)

Also Lilia being all ‘I hate flying brooms because of the Halloween corporations’ ‘profiting off our inability to travel like everyone else’ to “I haven’t done this in centuries (massive grin) she loves it and definitely will be doing it again. Bless her heart I hope she’s safe and happy for more centuries to come 👀👀👀👀 (marvel I’m at your fucking door)

Agatha and Rio choosing each other for the broom spell because they’ve done it hundreds of times and it’s probably the intimate thing besides the almost kiss in the last episode

Also when they’re handing the brooms to each other and Rio grazes Agatha’s hand, she was like ‘hold my hand you coward!’

Teen’s blue powers are pretty cool I have to admit but I would also like to say, and I’ve seen a few other people say it, I think he was subconsciously controlling the trial, because a few of them were a little ooc, like jen, instantly flipped to punishing Agatha and the others followed (Rio just wanted to play, know full well you can’t control death)

But he didn’t know what he was doing so when Alice (gone but never forgotten) jumped in to save Agatha and she died ☠️💔 he was so distraught, not only because she was so cool but because he made her do it, he just couldn’t comprehend what happened but knew it was him so he struggled with that knowledge (just like Wanda when she found out about the town)

‘You’re just like your mother’ (😰 her voice) but! I think at the end of the last episode when Agatha smiled at Rio after she told her he wasn’t her son, she knew then, she knew he was Wanda’s son but obviously she was still holding out hope, and when Rio confirmed it she knew what had to be done

Also! The Salem seven these freaky, creepy acrobatic bitches they’re fantastic! But if they’re the children of the coven that Agatha killed right? Didn’t they have other people looking after them? Like I don’t know much about the Salem era of course I wasn’t there ( or was I? 👀) I assume these mothers didn’t just leave 7 kids playing in dirt somewhere on their own like ‘mommy will be back I just have to go and kill a witch because her mother doesn’t like her and is very jealous of her’ like did they not return and the kids found friends in the animals that obviously gathered around them and form powers to turn into them and just decide well! Time to kill Agatha in a few hundred centuries or whatever

I’m thinking to much about this I know I am, but isn’t it fun?!

Also finally, Wanda I love you I love you to pieces but! This is Agatha all along maybe a post credit scene for you to come back and be like ‘my son! I’ve missed you, now let’s find your brother’ but this show is about Agatha and her ex wif- search for power!

I’m rambling and it makes no sense but god I can’t wait until next week, hopefully the witches come out of the quick sand mud and kick teens ass and Rio helps of course!

[cdyssey]

Agatha All Along (1.05) Reactions:

THESE CREEPY ASS ANIMAL WITCHES

“… because her own mother tried to have her executed.” Defending her ex-wife <3333

“Are you really defending a noted serial killer, you creepy lurker?” KQKSKJDWIJEJS, never change, Jen

“When Agatha murdered her sister witches, she spared their young children.” Agatha has a noted/known soft spot for children.

LMAO, AGATHA RUNNING IN LIKE A BAT OUT OF HELL. “Whoooooa, the moral of the story, kids, is always finish what you started. Also, mercy is overrated.”

I fucking love her so much

“All right, everybody. Pack up your shit. Let’s go!”

Rio being the only one who agrees with Teen suggesting the broom thing.

There being no question that Agatha and Rio are going to exchange brooms. They just DO it. love that Agatha makes rio’s pretty as well

Lilia, criticizing Jen’s broom: “You could have done better.” KQOWOFSJS. All these catty ass witches.

love Teen and Alice’s friendship.😭

The witches flying during a Blood Moon, and they’re all so happy omfggggg. That’s my coven of mothers (and one teenage boy).

AGATHA LOOKING BACK AT RIOOOOOO AUGHSHSHHSHS

SLUMBER PARTY FITS OMGGGGGGG. 80s???? 90s???

I LOVE LILIA’S HAIR

AGATHA’S TRIAL ALREADY??? HELLO??? I thought they’d keep that in their pocket until later in the season.

“And who better than to commune with the dead than someone who’s put so many in the grave?” Rio says with a smirk. Work and play.

“Do not speak over each other.” / [All the witches start speaking over each other.] lmfao

Jen @ Mrs. Hart: “Hey, girl. Feeling better?” AKqoqodjwiowkwjs I would die for her actually

Alice holding Jen by the shoulders 🥹

KATHRYN’S MRS. HART IMPRESSION.

“BAKING CASSEROLES, LINKING IN TO CONSPIRACY THEORIES ON FACEBOOK, DRINKING BEFORE NOON”

AGATHA BEING AN ASSHOLE AOQOWKDJDJSJ. goddamn I love her

“She’s just scared.” Rio clocking Agatha’s shit so easily. When Agatha’s scared, she absolutely puts on a repulsive performance to hide that very fact.

The reluctance in Agatha’s voice when she has to do it for real this time. Hhhghhhhh

“D-E-A-T-H.” Cue Rio laughing.

Agatha being the first to let go out of fear aufhshhshhhhhhhhh

“I hated this the first time!” Lilia’s already seen this particular trial in her premonitions.

HHHHHHHGH, the coven immediately turning on Agatha

“I mean, or we could just slit her throat.” she really loves threatening her wife with knives. <3

“When people ask me why I don’t have female friends.” Lmao, it’s because you’re always in psychosexual homoerotic rivalries with them. Hope that helps, Agatha. <3

FUCKING AGATHA JUMPSCARE GODDAMN

Sweetheart, you okay?” LAOQOWKWJDJEIWIEE

AGATHAS FUCKING MOTHER

“Hey, Mom. It was nice having you in my body for a second there. I’ve never felt so close to you before.” Agatha sounds so young and childish here, and I think that’s exactly the point, both of Kathryn’s acting choices here and the setting of the trial. Agatha is being taken back to her teenage years in a sense where so much of trauma began

Rio, more angry than we’ve ever heard her before: “No, no way!”

“A minute ago, you were ready to slit her throat.” Bc it’s foreplay for Agathario, Jen. Keep up!!

“Yeah, well, her mother can’t have her.” FUCK YES

goddamn, this really is Regina and Cora mills all over again, down to the ghost possession story

“Mom?” The fragile way that Agatha says it.

“Why do you hate me still?”

“You were born evil. I ought to have killed you the moment you left my body” FUCK OFF. NO ONE IS BORN EVIL

Agatha reflexively starts to tear up and Rio looks down. And the rest of the coven sees what clearly made Agatha Harkness too

Agatha fucking BEGGING them not to leave her

“I can be good.” DIDN’T SHE SAY THIS WHEN THEY TRIED TO EXECUTE HER SHUT UP

SOBBING ALICE TRYING TO PROTECT HER. AGATHA DRAINING ALICE. I CAN’T NO NO NO WHAT

AGATHA’S FUCKING SON, CONFIRMING HE’S DEAD

MAMA! STOP!

SOBBING???????

ALICE FUCKING DEAD.

I CAN’T DO THIS

NO

AGATHA GOING TO ALICE IN SHOCK UUGGGHHGFFFFFGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHGG AND TEEN REJECTING HER AND—

FUCK I CAN’T BELIEVE ALICE IS GONE GODDAMMIT. SHE JUST BROKE HER FAMILY CURSE FUCK OFF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Agatha alone, and she’s got a bit of Alice’s powers.

“I couldn’t… I couldn’t control it.” And Agatha swears she’s not lying to him. I think I believe her—that she currently can’t control her own ability kicking in when she’s blasted with powers and that what happened to Alice was an accident, but I equally think that she instinctively and automatically ENJOYS the sensation of the absorption/draining. Very much like a vampire or a succubus—when the power starts flowing, animal instinct takes over.

AGATHA SNICKERING. OH, SHE’S ABOUT TO READ HIM

IS KATHRYN HAHN THAT MUCH SHORTER THAN JOE LOCKE LMAO

“YOU’RE SO MUCH LIKE YOUR MOTHER” YES OMGGGGGG

IT’S BILLLLLLLLLYYYYYYYYYYY

AND SHE WALKS OFF CUNTILY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (Okay, but serious side note here. I think this particular confrontation is in conversation w/ Agatha pretending to be possessed by Mrs. Hart earlier in the episode. When she’s scared/vulnerable, she puts on a show. And the moment when Teen indexes that he doesn’t believe she’s telling the truth about her powers, she LEANS into the villainy. She digs her heels in. It’s protection. It’s control. It’s facade.

JEN AND LILIA THROWING HER INTO THE QUICKSAND. BILLY BLASTING THEM

HOLY FUCK

NOT THE BILLIE EILISH NEEDLE DROP OHBMY GOD?

WHY IS THE EPISODE OVER WHAT

AND WHERE DID RIO GO OOIUFHHSHSHS!!!!!!!!

[wearelondonhq]

AGATHA ALL ALONG + WANDAVISION MEME SET

Happy Meme Day!!! If you want to take part all you have to do is reblog this post. Remember if you reblog to send them out to EVERYONE who also does. Lasts from today up until the next wednesday (the 13th of november)!

“what were you looking for in my house?”

“the respect of your peers and a fulfilling home life. but you were fresh out of both.”

"you're so much like your mother."

"the world isn’t kind to little girls who don’t know their place."

"we are an unusual couple, you know?"

"this world you made will always be broken."

"this is your only warning. stay out of my home."

"we are not in control here."

"everything is meaningless without you."

"you can fix anything, mama."

"we've said goodbye before. it stands to reason that we will say hello again."

"i only remember feeling completely alone. empty. just… endless nothingness."

"_, welcome home."

"i read somewhere that it’s bad luck to say goodbye in the dark."

"i’m not a monster. i’m a mother."

"i just feel you."

"i just wanted to see you clearly."

"this is chaos magic, _"

"i’m tired of hiding."

"you have no idea what you’ve unleashed."

"you didn’t think you were the only magical girl in town, did you?"

"i can’t control this pain anymore, and i don’t think i want to."

"this is our home now. i want us to fit in."

"so long, darling."

"we’re not going anywhere."

"this is our home, then let’s fight for it."

"you don’t get to make that choice for me."

"you’re not my neighbor, and you’re definitely not my friend."

"you asked me to stay, so i’m staying."

"there are rules in life, we can’t just rush aging."

"is this really happening?"

"you’re not supposed to talk."

"thank you for choosing me to be your _."

"they’ll never know what you sacrificed for them."

"i’m beginning to think we should have stayed in bed."

"i’ve kept you safe in here. you feel at peace."

"if you stay here, you’ll die. it’ll be just like _ all over again."

"we can’t reverse death, no matter how sad it makes us."

"what is grief, if not love persevering?"

"i have what i want, and no one will ever take it from me again."

"you are my sadness, and my hope. but mostly, you’re my love."

"you can’t control me the way you do them."

"gosh, you really are a _. otherwise, none of this would be nearly as dramatic."

"honestly, I don't know how to feel. do I hate her? or do I want her phone number?"

"no one in history has had special treatment like you."

"no! i want more time! i want more time!"

"i'm thinking death by a thousand cuts."

"a long time ago, i loved someone. and I had to do something that I did not wanna do, even though it was my job. and it hurt them. she is my scar."

you can find a couple more options below the cut!

"i mean, seriously. we're an album cover waiting to happen."

"hey, you want straight answers, ask a straight lady."

"see, I feel like you've typecast me as the mouthy teen who didn't actually kill the victim but is guilty of some other b-story crime."

"you haven't been yourself the past few days. almost like you got bit by the true crime bug."

"congratulations, my love. i'm sorry I didn't have a ribbon for you to run through."

"you seem relaxed. usually at this point you're either complaining loudly or freaking out loudly."

"stop embarrassing me in front of my friends."

“witches like you are the reason people think we poison apples, steal , and eat .”

"i watch you, _. just as closely as you watch everyone else.

"are you really defending a noted serial killer, you creepy lurker?"

"i have always hated you. but I left you alone, because what you were doing is important."

"last one there is a nice person."

"i let them believe these things about me because the truth is too awful."

"sweetheart? you okay? oh my god! whoa, what’s she doing? where’s she going?"

"we'll be safe as kittens."

"the moral of the story, kids, IS always finish what you started. also, mercy is overrated.”

“may she be smart. not annoying. and also not… SUPER political.”

"i thought you were reading my palm."

“this is undignified. don’t you want me at my best?”

“are there any real witches in the house? because all i see are has-beens and could’ve-beens.”

"what can i say? i like the bad boys."

“did you know she traded her own child for the book of the damned?”

“they can take your power, _, but they can’t take your knowledge.”

“a witch is really just another name for a bad girl, right?”

“that is extremely reductive.”

"i let them believe these things about me because the truth is too awful."

“we’re alive. we made it through the first test. everyone is safe.”

“not everyone. _’s dead. "who’s _?”

“okay, so, confession. i know an egregious amount about you. i’ve been obsessed since i first read up on your _ days.”

“what a team of rejects. coward. fraud. disappointment. i’d say you should burn like the rest of them, but that would be a waste of kindling.”

“the road promises that what’s missing awaits you at its end. power is what i’m missing. sounds like it’s what you’re missing too.”

“it’s giving ‘middle-aged second chance at love’ vibes, and i’m here for it.”

[themadauthorshatter]

OTP PARENT HEADCANONS PART 2

Because I'm bored.

And I want to give myself some serotonin.

And because I've put this off for a long time😅

RED QUEEN:

Shade and Coriane were never afraid of monsters under their beds because Cal would "scare them away" with a really bright flashlight.

Both children have a little bit of buidling and tinkering in them. Shade showed it by switching out lightbulbs and pointed out the ones he was putting in would be better at being adjusted than the ones before and Coriane showed it by fixing a clock.

Mare isn't exactly the best at cooking, but she's at least better than Cal. And her mother; sorry, Ruth.

Both children are excellent swimmers, much to Cal's chagrin.

Coriane remembers meeting her great Nanabel, and the smile she had at the sight of her great granddaughter.

Shade didn't really have a chance to meet her.

Both children wish they could have met their uncle on their mother's side and uncle, grandfather, and grandmother on their father's side.

Both Samos siblings are allowed to see the children, and neither of the children were excited; they'd heard "scary stories" about them and their father, who sounds scary; no, Cal didn't make it clear that Volo was dead, all he said was the Samos patriarch had fallen down and didn't get up, so they assumed that meant he couldn't use his arms anymore.

They were all pretty surprised to meet each other.

Ptolemus was more like a fun uncle than the berserker they all knew.

He did explain that Volo did indeed fall, but couldn't get up because of how high he fell.

The electricons love how entertained the children are with their lightning abilities.

Tyton is a pretty good babysitter. Coriane is allowed to stay up, but only after Shade has gone to bed.

Kilorn is not allowed to teach either child how to swim; there was an 'incident' where Cal tried to be brave and go swimming and Kilorn scared the living hell out of him.

That's fine because neither children like swimming.

Yes. Just because the children are good at swimming doesn't mean they enjoy it.

Mare has told Gisa she doesn't need to make the children outfits, but Gisa did it anyway because she loves her niece and nephew.

The court ettique stuck with Cal, which has led to him raising the children to be very formal.

SCHOOL FOR GOOD AND EVIL(I'm naming Tedros and Agatha's son Anthony):

Both parents were kind of scared Anthony was mute because he didn't start talking until he was nearly a year old. He's not mute, he just doesn't talk much.

You have to catch him at just the right moment. Anthony is completely silent around large crowds or assemblies, but with his parents he's half of a chatterbox, at least.

Anthony and Agatha can have full conversations with nothing but facial expressions.

Tedros had a hard time getting Anthony to open up to him, and decided to give the boy space for a little bit.

It was absolutely worth it for the heart to heart they had.

Hester and Anadil hate kids, but Agatha's and Tedros's little demon spawn is the only exception to that statement.

Anadil was won over by how he didn't cry and even 'said' how her rats were cute.

Hester, however, only warmed up to him when she spent a longer time with him, and after getting a chance to watch him because Aunt Sophie kept stepping in.

On one such occasion, where Anthony was surprised by Hester's watching him, the boy was overjoyed to see her, hugging her closely. He then backed up and stepped back, giving her a wave and smile. As she understood his silence better than Sophie, Hester wrote to him on a paper, 'Did you miss me THAT much?' Anthony nodded and wrote back, 'Yes!'

Sophie is not a helicopter aunt, but she loves Anthony a bit too much for his liking.

She NEVER talks about how she'd been hoping he was a girl.

Anthony isn't a fan of pink, but he doesn't hate it. Pastel is fine. Anything more vibrant makes him puke.

Both Tedros and Agatha were surprised to see how good Anthony was on horse back.

Heart attack angst moment: A former supporter of Rhian and Japeth snuck into the castle and made an assassination attempt on the royal family, more specifically Anthony. Tedros threw his son behind him and drew hus sword and Agatha shot a spell at him and proceeded to tackle him to the ground, not caring about her dress or the fact that the assailant was still armed.

Anthony colud not watch the execution because he hates bloodshed. He's a vegetarian/vegan and tries to eat as little meat as possible because he often spends time in the stables and around animals.

Agatha and Tedros are aware of this and are okay with it, though Tedros has him eat a single steak for dinner and teo eggs for breakfast once a month on seperate occasions, just so he doesn't lack any iron or protein.

To clarify, by separate occasions, I mean that Anthony will eat the steak one day and the eggs later another day within the month. After that, he can indulge in as much vegan/vegetarian food as he wants.

Have fun trying to convince Tedros and Agatha to let him attend the SGE; it's not that they have unpleasant memories, they just want him to try and have as normal of a life as possible.

On a walk, and when the Tagatha child was a teen, Tedros noticed some girls trying to flirt with Anthony and that his son barely reciprocated their actions. He pointed out that they were showing an interest in him, and Anthony admitted that he knew and he just didn't really feel the same way; he didn't exactly see why they were so flirty when he didn't feel like giving it back to them.

NIGHTMARE BEFORE CHRISTMAS(The triplets I'm naming Jacob, the eldest boy, Luna, the middle girl, and Daemon, the youngest boy):

Jacob is 98% the triplets' father; he'd be a spitting image if it weren't for his mop of hair, he's sharp as a whip, but still puts the E in idiot(please tell me you git that Jenna Marbles reference!!!).

Luna is arguably the smartest, but good luck getting a, 'you don't say' out of her. She won't tell you she's smarter than you, she will show you. Good thing Jack and Sally keep her in check.

Daemon is the family's "underdog." He has the last minute, 'this will work,' Jack Sparrow plans. He's quiet, he sews, he sings, and if he's not trailing behind Jack, Sally, or his siblings, he's probably touching up his clothes.

Jacob was the idiot kid that got electrocuted to the point his red hair turned black. He barely remembers it, but now all he tastes is cold peanut butter. Daemon has often suggested and offered to do it again, but Luna stops him. Pro: he's spending more time with Luna and Jacob is safe. Con: he's spending time with LUNA and Jacob still doesn't remember.

Jacob, as the oldest, attends 'meetings' with Jack and the Mayor. It doesn't bore him, he just gets tired of the Mayor's whining.

Jacob doesn't get Christmas. Luna has the basic idea of it. Daemon is the only one that understands, but doesn't explain it fully out of spite; Jacob called him scatter brained because of an incident where, at the table, a cockroach crawled out of his eye socket.

Daemon is the only one of his siblings to have eyes.

Even though she's literal bone, Luna has stitches that are very close to Sally's.

Neither Jack nor Sally have nicknames for the children, besides terms of endearment.

You know you're in trouble when Jack looks at you and looks ready to dig your grave himself.

All three triplets have Jack's fire power, but no one's gotten hurt because of it, even though Jacob and Daemon had one close call.

Neither parent would ever even dream of raising a hand against the children.

It's safe to say that Luna and Sally use common sense the most out of all five of the family members.

Daemon smells like pumpkin and cinnamon. He finds both himself, cinnamon bark and small, apple-esque pumpkins, and eats them like skittles and popcorn.

Another result of the electrocution, Jacob is hard of hearing where is left ear would be, if he had ears. He can't hear at all in the "ear." Not even a ringing sound.

The only reason Jacob doesn't like something is because he doesn't get it. At all.

Luna sees the glass as half full, Daemon sees the glass as half empty, and wonder if it belongs to someone who drank out of said glass, hence its being hald empty, and Jacob just sees a glass of water, now can he just drink the rest?

Luna, the best with herbs, has poisoned her brothers. Sally found out and she was grounded.

Daemon, to see how much he could take, dived off the roof of Dr. Finkelstein's tower. It took Jack, Sally, Luna, Jacob, and Zero all day to collect all of him. He was grounded and locked in his room.

Jacob got grounded for a few things: setting his sister on fire(no one knows who started that fight.), hiding in a morgue to scare people only to end up falling asleep, even as they tried to cremate him, and then waking up in front of the humans, pretending to be one of the hanging men on The Hanging Tree, and dancing on top of the tallest Pyramid in Egypt.

The children do misbehave sometimes, but their parents love them.

Jack and Jacob don't see eye to eye exactly, but they still get each other.

Luna loves both her brothers, but she will hang out with Daemon more than Jacob.

Daemon has a lot of glow sticks he collected and they all still glow when it gets dark. Jacob used his thinking cap and had a moment of big brain time, and drank some of the glow stick juice.

One more thing he got in trouble for.

Daemon also got in trouble, but he was allowed to keep his glow sticks.

Luna is a good singer, Daemon is a great dancer, and Jacob is the best at succeeding their father

[letterstothemidnightsociety]

THAT’S RIGHT BITCH! It’s October and I am still watching and inexplicably blogging about Supernatural - a dinosaur of a television show that’s been on the air longer than most children I know have been alive. 

I know I’m An Old because I don’t think kids these days understand the struggle it was watching television before streaming. We had to wait for episodes. Hell, I don’t think kids these days even really have to wait for seasons. I mean, Voltron premiered on Netflix in 2016, capped off their seasons at 13 episodes a piece and, oh yeah - aired seasons 5 - 8  all in 2018. Was I mad about that? No of course not. Do I also say phrases like “kids these days? Yes, so who even knows if what I think is relevant anymore. 

Alright, so speaking of seasons, last time I looked at pilots and pilot seasons and how the streaming era is changing everything we know about starting a TV show. But once you’ve got your pilot down, now what? 

Not this kind of pilot. Also, based on the prerequisites for demon possession, we’re all agreed this co-pilot’s like, an alcoholic, right?

There’s a rule in TV (sort of) that the first six episodes (some might argue the first season entirely) should be a kind of rehash of the pilot. The pilot sets up your premise and once you’ve got your pilot down, your job as a TV writer is to re-establish that premise over and over again. You’re building your world, you’re writing it’s rules. You’re setting up a template, a formula for how your episodes are gonna play out. This helps your audience get to know the characters, get familiar with your world, get comfortable spending time with them. Essentially, you’re getting your audience to trust the show that they’re going to be tuning in to for at least the next 20-some-odd episodes. 

I’d also argue that this is important so that later, you can break that format later. I’m not saying you should break the trust your audience puts in you, and that’s probably a real fine line of distinction. But if you break your rules right, it can hit the audience with a big emotional sucker punch. Or, it can stand out as a real breakout, tentpole of an episode - I’m thinking specifically about Ghostfacers! In season 3, or Once More, With Feeling, from Buffy. Those episodes work, really work, because they deviate from the formula, but they only work because we know the formula so well.  And these aren’t big changes to the way episodes are done, they’re just shifted ever so slightly that they felt new again.. 

So what is the premise of the first four episodes Supernatural? What’s the formula they set up for the rest of the series? 

Brothers. I said it in my last post, I’ll say it again, Sam and Dean/Jensen Ackles and Jared Jared Padalecki are what makes this show. Full stop. I think we could have gotten 5 seasons out of a show starring two other dudes. I do not think this show could have gotten 15 seasons with two other dudes. So from the pilot through Phantom Traveler, we learn that Sam and Dean have a sh*tty home life - their mother was killed by some mysterious evil thing and their father raised them to be little demon-hunting child soldiers while they look for the killer. Oh yeah, and Sam’s girlfriend died the exact same way which we will never forget because Sam’s gonna have a dream about it almost every episode from here on out. We set up the tension between the brothers - that Sam got to go to college while Dean stayed with their dad like a good boi. We learn that everybody hates each other probably because they are deeply and unhealthily codependent love each other so damn much. 

Next we get the basic rundown of the season arc: 

Dad’s on a hunting trip and he hasn’t been home in a few days. The Winchester brothers are looking for him and by extension, looking for answers as to what killed their mom/Sam’s girlfriend. We also get the basic rundown of every episode: dad is a mysterious and elusive sonuvuabitch, so every episode they go about, say it with me now:

“The family business.” I would also accept “Killing as many evil sons of bitches as I possibly can,” but why can’t I find a gif for it?!? 

Backtracking on this but you know what else gets hecking established with the Winchesters? Sam is the cute one with the people skills and the puppy dog face, so you’d naturally assume that he’s the soft one. No. Not the case. Dean is the Sofffft Boi. The SOFTest boi. Dean wants Sam to talk about his feelings, Dean wants Sam to not keep things bottled up, Dean is the one who desperately wants to keep a hold of his family and also is just deeply broken and traumatized on the inside and oh no, I told myself I wouldn’t do this but I did it anyway. Sorry not sorry. This watch, I’m really picking up on the fact that Dean is, weirdly, the Mom Friend in this first season. Like, he’s basically a Trailer-Trash-Teen-Pregnancy Mom who’ll give you spaghettios five nights a week and a shot of whiskey so you’ll quit yer bitchin’ and go to sleep faster, but he’s the Mom nonetheless. Later in this season and in other seasons, I think you even see him do his dumb-baby-best filling in as the Mom when John went off the deep end. Anyway, I have a lot of feelings and we don’t have time to unpack all of that so I’ll just move on.

RUDE.

Next we set up our Supernatural Bag of Holding - what’s in it? What are the mystical artifacts they use to kill those evil sons of bitches? First up is The Car. Damn, I am not a cars girl, but that 67 Chevy, it does things to me. 

This car has some weird pavlovian trigger for me, it’s not NATURAL. 

The journal. 

John Winchester, you journal the way I imagine a psycho killer journals and I would just really appreciate it if you could be ANY MORE ORGANIZED THAN THIS.

The Trunk Full of Weapons - I love that in these first few episodes (and possibly the rest of the series???) they give this HELLA conspicuous look every time they open the trunk full of weapons. It’s hilarious EVERY TIME.

No, you’re not being obvious at ALL, guys.

The Fake ID’s - from credit cards to impersonating feds, these boys are not afraid to break the law to save some lives and I feel like that’s...that’s the theme of the show maybe? They’re here to save people and they’ll do what they have to to do that? In a world that clearly establishes a dark vs. light/good vs. evil dichotomy, the Winchester make it their job to live in a world of grey? Basically? 

Next on the checklist for this first season of Supernatural - it’s spoopy. *Spoop mileage may vary.* I said it last time, but I’ll say it again: this first season aired at 9:00pm at night. That means it’s primetime stuff for the 18 - 25 year old crowd, but they don’t want to risk some 13 year old watching it and getting too scared before bed. 9:00pm is X Files time slots, Fringe time slots. 9:00pm says you’re gonna get something a little more gruesome and gory and shocking than at 8pm. 8pm is for Friends. Vampire Diaries aired at 8pm its first season. 9pm is for the real adult content (but not too adult because the audience is still mostly children). 

SPOOP!

But yeah, let’s look at the real horror vibe that you get off of these first four episodes. We talked about La Llorona from the first episode - this is a legit ghost that they fight. The kids at the end that literally drag their mom to hell? Pretty spooky stuff. The Wendigo in episode 2 is a literal monster of the week and so for me personally, it’s not that scary, but it is a cannibal monster that eats human flesh. Dead in the Water has vibes from both Jaws and Friday the 13th. Everything from the lighting to the sound design let’s you know this is a horror show, or as horror as you can get on network television. Listen to the scenes just before somebody dies and you get a nice creepy “Come play with me” whisper coming out of the water. I’m a little spooked just thinking about it now. Yes I know I’m a chicken, and I’m OK WITH THAT. And if we go past my season 1 disc 1 into episode 5, Bloody Mary is STILL terrifying and I STILL watched that episode with half my face covered. That’s where I am these days. It’s 2020 and the world is a nightmare but imagining Bloody Mary creepin’ out in my mirror does not need to be a part of it. 

SHE F*CKIN CLIMBS OUT OF THE MIRROR GUYS! I DIDN’T KNOW SHE COULD DO THAT!!!

Then we get Phantom Traveler and our very first case of black-eyed-demonic possession. Watching this episode now, it’s like watching someone’s home movie of their first steps as a baby. They’ve never even done an exorcism before guys! They have to read the exorcism rite out of the journal! It’s so cute!!! Let’s not think too hard about how they got that full sized bottle of holy water past TSA in a post-9/11 world. And try to ignore how poorly these special effects have aged - the smoke from the demon possession?? OMG! THIS EFFECT! I’m pretty sure I could make that effect with my first ever graphic design software on my, like, 2009 mac book pro. So cute and soooo good! I’m gonna leave that CG plane alone, they’re doing their best. 

SO cute and SOOO good!

You want to know what my favorite established staple of Supernatural season 1 is? The extras. LOOKIT these guys - 

Wendigo you have Cory Monteith who later goes on to star in Glee. 

You have Alden Ehrenreich, Debatable Han Solo, doing a lot of face work with very little dialogue. 

You have Gina Holden who is in SO. MANY. Spooky-type things! My personal favs are Blood Ties and Harper’s Island, but she’s in Fringe, she’s in the SAW franchise, she’s in the Final Destination franchise, she was in some deleted scenes on an episode of Teen Wolf! I LOVE seeing Gina Holden, anywhere she pops up. 

And speaking of Harper’s Island, you’ve also got Callum Keith Rennie who played John Wakefield in Harper’s Island, a show that was A+ Great and I highly recommend if you like Agatha Christie and/or murder mysteries. 

Honestly, Rennie looks like he’s about to murder a bitch in this episode of Supernatural, it is not a stretch to believe he’s a psycho killer.

Dead in the Water you’ve got Amy Acker, a regular in Joss Whedon and Whedon-adjacent type shows.

Good LORD, this wardrobe was SO 2000′s WB and it PAINED me.

And finally in Phantom Traveler, you have Jaime Ray Newman who also shows up in a lot of the shows that I like to watch. She was in Eureka, she was in Midnight Texas, both kind of terrible shows that I love because they are terrible, but she was ALSO in Bates Motel and Veronica Mars, which are generally considered to be more quality, so there’s that. 

This still implies that they actually LIT scenes, which is a SURPRISE TO ME. 

Point is, seeing these actors in Supernatural back in the early 2000’s felt like I was seeing the start of their careers. That may or may not have been the case, but as a viewer it was exciting to see them pop up again in other things.

So what about TV now? Do we still use those first 6 (sometimes more) episodes to re-establish the premise? Well, it certainly hasn’t gone away. Look at any network show that still produces 22 - 24 episodes a season and you’ll still see that the pilot season just keeps re-iterating the premise established in the pilot episode, specifically in anything that’s procedural - that’s you’re monster/problem-of-the-week shows. Think sitcoms like Brooklyn 99 or Superstore or dramedies like Zoey’s Extraordinary Playlist. The reason being that these shows play in the traditional model of television - on a network, once a week. They are not releasing episodes all at one time or relying on their audiences to stream a whole season in one sitting. These are shows that still assume that someone out there is going to tune in or stumble across their show one night while they’re surfing channels (lol) and need to be told, no matter what episode they’ve just turned on, what the premise of the show is. They need to be formulaic so that people can pick it up anywhere at any time.

But what about shows that don’t follow this traditional model? I mentioned in my last post that seasons are getting shorter and shorter, so when you’re writing a show that only has (8) episodes instead of 22, how much time do you really want to spend establishing the premise? Because of these short seasons, you’re also dealing with shows that are more serialized and less procedural than their predecessors - meaning, you’re dealing with a show that focuses on a season long story (think Game of Thrones or Stranger Things where each episode is an important chapter that you can’t skip) vs. a procedural (think the shows I mentioned above or any cop drama really) where each episode is it’s own contained story, neatly wrapped up at the end. These are shows where you can skip an episode and still know where you are in the show no matter where you start or stop watching. Supernatural is a little bit of both - procedural with their monsters of the week AND serialized with a season long arc. We’ll talk more on that in a later post. 

Not only are we getting shorter seasons, but we’re also dealing with shows that are not released over long periods of time. A few streaming channels, like Disney+ and HBO Max, make a deliberate point to slow-drip their seasons, but most streaming channels will release entire seasons in one shot. You don’t need to worry about your audience missing an episode because they have 24/7 access to all the episodes all at once. And for the most part, they’re designed to be binged. They start at full speed and they don’t slow down to keep driving you to the finale. 

Do I think the procedural is ever going to go away? No. As much talk as there is about dropping the cop drama from TV all together, I think audiences still love a good mystery series. And you can’t just think of procedurals as cop dramas either - a procedural also covers most if not all sitcoms. New Girl, Letterkenny, Parks and Rec, Superstore - these all have a premise that doesn't change from week to week. They may make tiny shifts away from what they set up in the pilot, but by and large, you know what you’re getting into any time you turn on an episode. I think we as an audience still like that kind of familiarity. We may be seeing a bigger swing towards more serialized content, but that doesn't mean that the procedural is dead and gone. 

So that’s what we’ve got for Supernatural - two dudes, driving around in a car full of spears and hand guns, killing bad guys. Some day, they may even find that father that’s missing. What could possibly go wrong? A lot. Stay tuned. 

[bazypitchandsimonsnow]

Games People Play

Rating: Teen

Genre: Fluff/Minor Angst

Word Count: 8343

Summary: Baz gets dragged to a party by Dev. Simon gets dragged to a party by Penelope. Hijinks ensue. Based on "spin the bottle" request.

Read on AO3

AN: Oy vey, this took longer than I wanted. Work keeps giving me the goddamn morning and closing shifts so I've been exhausted beyond belief. But now I'm down to four shifts a week so more writing time :D Shout out to @carryonmylovelies for being the best writing helper/encouragement this side of the cosmos. Love you hun <3 Hope you guys like this!

———————————————

Baz

“Baz,” Dev whines, draping himself all over my back like some annoying floppy blanket. “Please?”

“You being pathetic is certainly not going to change my mind,” I say, focusing intently on my own notes. We have finals in a week, dammit, and my cousin is more focused on this.

“But I need you there! To be my wingman!”

I raise an eyebrow at him. “What makes you think I would be a good wingman?”

“Okay, less of a wingman, more of a support.”

“And since when am I a good support either?”

Dev plops himself on my desk, pushing a pile of my perfectly stacked notes. I scowl deeply. Fucking hell, I’m going to strangle him, blood relation be damned.

“Please, Basil? I’ll get you a new bullet journal or something nerdy like that.�� He flicks my stack of leather notebooks.

“Nice try, but no cigar, cousin.” I push my glasses further up my nose. “I have far too much studying to do.”

He groans and slumps further against the wall. “But Agatha is might be there! She’s finally single again after three bloody years. This could be my chance!”

I scoff. “Sure.”

Dev glares at me so hard his eyes become slits. “A man can dream.”

“A man can hallucinate, especially with the right help.”

He leans over, arching over my very important homework. “Y’know, I heard Simon is going to be there too.”

Oh. Fuck. I freeze up, heat rising to my face instantly. A grin spreads across Dev’s stupid face. Bloody hell, I wish I had never told him about my stupid crush. Him, Niall, and I were all drinking cheap beer and playing truth or dare. Apparently that beer was strong to get me to answer “who’s your biggest crush?” truthfully. It’s not something I’m proud of, crushing on my gorgeous idiot roommate. But it exists, and it makes me- he makes me very weak. Damn Dev for using it to his advantage.

“He hates parties,” I mumble.

“Yeah,” Dev leans closer, “but rumour has it, Penelope Bunce is dragging him there. Something about getting him to have fun since his breakup with Agatha. Maybe he could have fun with you.”

I immediately throw a notebook at his stupid face so I don’t have to see it. But it’s also to hide my stupid bright red cheeks. The rational part of my brain knows that’s a one in a billion shot. Snow hates me. He thinks I hate him. It can’t happen. But my lovesick side desperately wants to be hopeful. Maybe, just maybe...

“Fine,” I grumble.

Dev straightens up. “Huh?”

“Fine, I’ll go with you to the stupid party.”

Dev grins like a kid on Christmas. “Yay! Oh, thank you, thank you, thank you, Baz!”

He throws his arms around my neck, bringing most of his weight along with him. I push him off me before I’m strangled. “Yeah, yeah, you owe me, arsehole.”

“I thought Snow’s presence was your payment.”

“No. I expect five mint Aero bars by no later than next week.”

“Ugh, fine. Small price.” He jumps off my desk, then gives me one last squeezy hug. “You’re my favourite cousin.”

“That’s not saying much, considering your other cousins are my demon siblings.”

“Yeah,” he chuckles. “Good point. Party starts at 8 in Fraternity basement. Meet me at my room at 7:45. Bring your game face and cologne. Maybe Snow will like the smell.”

He dashes off, but not before I chuck a pen at his stupid head. It just misses. Dammit. I sigh and hold my face, rubbing it up and down. What the fuck am I doing? This is idiotic. Snow hates my guts, I’ve made sure of that. I decided early on it was easier to just make him hate me from the start than confess my feelings and have him destroy my pathetic gay heart. Snow will always despise me. A party won’t change years of fights and snark and anger. No matter how much deep down I might want it to.

The door slams open, making me jolt. I don’t even need to look to know who it is.

“And a good afternoon to you too, Snow,” I say.

“Fuck off,” he growls like an animal. His uniform is in its usual disarray, tie loose and shirt rumpled. On anyone else I would call it sloppy. But on him, I find it ruggedly charming.

“Pleasant as always, I see.” I push up my glasses and turn back to my notebook, instead of looking at his stupid bronze curls and mesmerizing plain blue eyes.

“I don’t need your shit today, Baz.” I listen as he violently throws open his desk drawers. It sounds like a cabinet in a hurricane. Snow is always a force of nature, in both good and bad ways.

I sigh sarcastically. “Alright. Be as loud and pissy as you want, not like anyone else lives here. Don’t you have chemistry right now?”

He growls again and slams his drawer particularly loud. “Forgot my notes.”

“Ah, I see. Didn’t know you could take any.” The comment is out of my mouth before I can stop it. Sharp comments at Snow have become reflex at this point.

He gives the leg of my chair a good kick, rattling my whole body. I glare at him over my glasses, and he glares right back. Bloody hell, he’s so damn attractive. I look away before my face turns red. Luckily, Snow stomps away again, and I’m left in blissful peace.

Fucking hell, this party is going to be a nightmare.

———————————————

Dev

I’m putting the finishing touches on my amazing hair when I hear the knock.

“That Baz?” Niall asks me, voice all nasally from his clogged nose. He’s on his bed, reading some football magazine while surrounded by a mountain of tissues.

“Probably,” I reply. “He’s willing to go to the party with me.”

Niall scoffs but it comes out as a cough. “Sorry I have allergies.”

“Excuses, excuses.” I waltz over to the door. “Baz is my true friend.” I fling the door open, and my hands immediately drop. “Oh my god.”

Baz raises one eyebrow at me. “What?”

“What the ever loving fuck are you wearing?!”

Baz looks down at his perfectly pressed navy slacks, buttoned to the collar white shirt, and polished black oxfords. “Have you gone blind, cousin? It’s a shirt and slacks.”

I groan and shake my head. “I can see it’s shirts and slacks, Baz. Why are you wearing it?”

“Because it’s good party attire.”

“Mother of God, Basil, you- I just-” I groan again, grabbing his wrist to haul him inside. “Get in here, we have to fix you.”

“Fix me? But-”

“You’re not wearing a suit to a high school party, end of story.” I push him down onto my bed by his shoulders. “First off, this goes.”

I reach out and ruffle his slicked back hair. He smacks my hand away. “Hey!”

I shove a finger in his face. “No one under forty slicks back their hair. And if they do, they’re an arsehole.” I hand him my wide tooth comb. “Comb it out. Now.”

“Why?” Baz hisses.

“Because you don’t want Snow to mistake you for a tight arse banker, right?”

Baz keeps frowning, but starts combing it out anyway. Good. “Next, you’re not wearing these.”

I take his glasses off his face. Baz gapes and tries to snatch the spectacles out of my hand, but I’m too fast. “Dev! Give those back!”

“No! They make you look even more nerdy, and right now we’re making you look cool.”

“But I need them to see!”

“No, you don’t. You only need them to see stuff that’s super far away. This basement is not that big, you’ll be fine. Honestly, I think you wear these to look smart.”

Baz frowns, but he doesn’t protest. He knows I’m right. I nod and go to Niall’s dresser, sorting the messy piles on top that should be in the drawers.

“Hey, what are you doing?” Niall asks furiously, but I can’t take him seriously with that high pitched clogged nose voice.

“Baz is going to borrow some of your clothes.”

“Why not your’s?”

“I’m a head shorter than Baz. You two are the same height.”

Baz scowls. “I am not wearing Niall’s clothes. He dresses like a wannabe club cruiser.”

Niall leans over and punches Baz in the arm, hard. Baz growls and punches back with just as much force. Seriously, are they still five?

“No,” I say, “Niall dresses like a normal teenage boy. And tonight you’re going to pretend you’re one too.”

I throw more clothes onto the floor, until I finally find something good. I grin ear to ear. Yes, this is perfect. I turn around and toss the clothing right at Baz’s face, hitting him with a small whack. “There. Wear these.”

Baz takes them off his face and gives them a once over. He looks positively disgusted. “Absolutely not.”

“No bitching. Put them on or we’re not going and you don’t get to gaze longingly at Simon from across the room.”

He looks indignant, and I’m worried he’s going to punch me. But instead he just huffs and stomps to the door, heading to our communal washroom I suppose. I lean to the side to shout at his back. “And you’re wearing Niall’s sneakers! Not those bloody oxfords!”

He flips me off before slamming the door hard. I chuckle and flop back on my bed.

“What would he do without us?” I sigh.

“I think he’s considering finding out,” Niall replies, then sneezes loudly into a tissue. He slowly brings it away. The whole kleenex is covered in snot.

“You’re disgusting” I say.

“Fuck off,” he grumbles. “I hope Baz ends up killing you.”

I smirk, laying down on my crossed arms. Baz won’t kill me. I’m going to have my chance with Agatha, he’ll have his chance with Snow, and we’ll both be happy. Everything will be great.

———————————————

Simon

Everything sucks.

Why am I even here? I’m tired, I’m sweaty, I’m still getting over Agatha, and this party sucks. It’s just a bunch of my classmates in a dingy basement, totally pissed out of their minds, stumbling and bumping into each other. There’s not even any dancing. What’s a party without dancing?!

“I’m bored,” I groan, flopping against Penny, cheek pressed on her head. She sighs and pushes at my side.

“You’re bored because you refuse to leave this wall next to the snack table,” she replies. “Go mix and mingle, bloody well talk to someone other than me.”

“But everyone else doesn’t like me.”

“That’s not true, Si, lots of people like you.”

I scoff and cross my arms. Penny’s usually never wrong, but this time she is. People don’t like me, they’re fascinated by me; the weird orphan scholarship kid, the headmaster’s pet project. Only Penny and Agatha actually like me and know me. (Well, Agatha did like me.) And then there’s Baz, who just straight up hates me. Posh prick. Just because I wasn’t born with perfect hair and pretty eyes and a silver spoon shoved up my arse like him he thinks I’m lower than dirt. At least I don’t dress like a nerd. That’s one advantage I have over him, I guess.

“Are you going to leave any snacks for the rest of us?” Penny asks.

I look her in the eye as I shove a bunch of crisps in my mouth. “I’ve captured these crisps in the name of House Snow.”

Penny rolls her eyes and shakes her head. “I never should have introduced you to Game of Thrones.”

I smile wide, crisps filling my chipmunk cheeks. Penny laughs happily. Well, maybe being here isn’t too bad. I turn back to look out at the party, still grinning. But then my mouth immediately falls open, chip crumbs spilling on my shirt.

“Simon!” Penny yells. “What are you, five?!”

I dust the crumbs off my shirt, quickly chew and swallow, and point at exactly what I’m looking at. Or more precisely, who. “Penny, Penny, look. Tell me I’m not crazy, is that Baz?!”

Penny squints, pushing her glasses up her nose. I watch as her brown eyes go impossibly wide. “Holy shit, it is.”

“Holy shit,” I echo. Because...this is insane.

In the years I’ve known him, Baz has always dressed like a posh nerd. Uniform crisp and pristine, glasses down his nose like some snooty scholar, and raven hair gelled to oblivion. But tonight, he’s very different. For one, he’s not wearing his glasses, making his cheekbones look even sharper and deep sea grey eyes more visible. His hair isn’t gelled either. It falls in his face in a lazy wave. Most shocking of all, for the first time ever, he isn’t in businessman attire. He’s wearing a torso hugging charcoal grey v-neck, white trainers, and black skinny jeans. Since when does Baz wear black fucking skinny jeans?! And they’re like, really tight, showing off every toned muscle he’s gained from playing football. I can’t stop looking, holy shit.

“Simon? Hello? You still in there?” Penny is waving a hand in front of my face. I blink rapidly, snapping out of my jeans induced trance.

“Uh, yeah, Pen, I’m here. Oh my god, what is going on with Baz tonight?”

She shrugs, looking more like me than herself. “I don’t know. Maybe he’s decided to change up his style.”

“I seriously doubt that. He’s been wearing the same kind of clothes since we were all eleven, Pen.”

“People can change.”

“Not Baz.” I narrow my eyes, examining his strange outfit  with careful precision. “He’s plotting something.”

Penny sighs and rubs the bridge of her nose. “Simon, for the last time, Baz is not some vampire supervillain.”

I scoff, crossing my arms with a frown. “Says you. I just haven’t proven it yet.”

“Whatever, Si. How about you try to have fun tonight? That’s why we’re here, remember?”

I hear what Penny is saying, but I’m still watching Baz. He’s got his arms crossed, leaning on one foot, a frown on his face. But that last one could just be, y’know, him. Everything about his face is designed for pouting. Either way, he doesn’t look happy to be here, no more than me. He must not like that his plot isn’t working or something. I keep glaring at him as I shove M&M’s into my mouth.

“And you’re gone,” Penny sighs. “I do not get your issue with him.”

“You don’t live with him,” I grumble through my candy.

“No, but I feel like I know way too much about him because of you. Seriously you need to stop obsessing over him.”

Baz lifts a hand to tuck a piece of his raven hair behind his ear, showing off the pointy tip. I stroke my chin. What’s the purpose of that? Is he trying to distract me? Is he trying to pretend he’s all cute and innocent and not evil? Strange, very strange...

“Hey! We’re playing spin the bottle!” someone shouts. “Who wants in?”

I stay on my wall. I don’t have anything against spin the bottle, but I’m busy, and not really in the mood to kiss a few random classmates. Plus I haven’t seen Agatha yet, but she might not be here. I’d rather not run into her.

Suddenly, there’s a hand on my arm and someone is dragging me away. I look over at Penny, who has a determined expression on her face.

“Pen, where are we going?” I ask, fear filling my voice.

“You’re going to play spin the bottle.”

I inhale sharply. “What?! No way!”

“Yes way! You’re going to go have fun, dammit.”

“Is spin the bottle supposed to be fun? I thought it was just embarrassing.”

“I don’t know, I’ve never played. And I’m not going to play cause I’m in a serious relationship.”

“Great endorsement,” I mutter. I try to wriggle out of her grip, but it’s no use. She’s like a bloody pitbull. Eventually, she turns to face me, hand on her hip.

“Simon, you can’t mope and overthink about Baz against a wall the entire time. Just try this, see if you have fun. You haven’t had fun in ages. You can stop anytime, just try please.”

I sigh, body and ego deflating at once. “Fine, I’ll try.”

Penny smiles a bit. “Good.”

She lets go, but I keep walking towards the loose circle of tipsy British teens. I recognize most of them. Trixie, Keris, Rhys, Gareth, and Philippa. (Luckily no Agatha, that would be awkward.)

“Hey we’ll join!”

We all turn to the left. “Oh god,” I groan.

Baz glares at me as he sits next to Dev, crossing his arms over his chest. His eyes are deep sea grey daggers trying to stab me in the head. Why did he have to sit so close to me?! Luckily there’s a slightly drunk boy between us, wobbling back and forth even though he’s sitting. Hope he doesn’t get sick on any of us, especially if we’re supposed to be bloody kissing.

Oh fuck, what if I have to...no, no way. There’s very little chance that will happen. The universe can’t hate me that much.

Keris raises her hand. “I’ll go first.”

I lean my cheek on my palm. I really don’t care who goes, as long as it’s not me. Keris grabs the vodka bottle and gives it a good hard spin. I follow the spinning with my eyes, watching as the low orange light reflects off the glass. It’s kind of hypnotising, almost makes me want to sleep. Christ, I’m bored.

The bottle finally stops, and everyone either laughs or groans. It lands right on Trixie. I burst out in fits of giggles, clutching my stomach. Okay, maybe the universe sucks, but at least it has a sense of humour.

“You cheated!” Gareth declares.

Keris snorts and rolls her eyes. “Yeah, I can totally cheat at spinning a bottle, Gareth.”

“If there is you found a way!”

Keris shrugs. She turns to her left and kisses her girlfriend right on the mouth. The really drunk people whoop and cheer. Some of my more immature male classmates gasp or gape like fish. Penny just sighs behind me. This isn’t unusual for her. I’ve heard many rants from her about Trixie and Keris’ snogging in her room. This is probably mild for her.

The couple separates with a little pop. Both girls are grinning ear to ear. A few boys are still gaping, which is kind of gross. I glance over at Baz, to see if maybe he’s having any sort of reaction. But he’s still as stone faced as ever. He seems to be having even less fun than me. That’s one plus, I guess.

“My turn,” Trixie singsongs. She lays a delicate hand on the bottle and spins it. It lands a foot away from me, and for a second I think it landed on Baz. My heart rate jumps a beat. Holy shit, did that land on him? But when Dev raises his hand, I let out a long breath, feeling relieved for some reason.

“I don’t think you want to kiss me,” Dev chuckles, and everyone else chuckles along with him. Except Baz, because he’s a creature of darkness who is physically incapable of laughter.

“The cheek okay?” Trixie asks

Dev shrugs with a small smile. “I’ll take it.

Trixie leans forward on her knees and Dev follows. She plants a big wet kiss on his cheek. Rhys gives a sarcastic whoop and holler. Gareth gives his own over dramatic “oooooo” and pumps his fist. As she sits back, Trixie rolls her eyes, going back to slum;ing on Keris’ shoulder.

“You two are so mature,” she drawls.

Gareth and Rhys keep giggling and high five each other. I chuckle under my breath. It’s immature, but just a bit funny. Dev takes the bottle in hand and spins it hard. I’ve heard rumours he has a crush on Agatha, so whoever he gets he’ll probably be disappointed. I’m getting bored again, leaning on my hand. The bottle lands on Philippa. The cheering duo gets punched in the arm by Keris before they get out too many whoops or hollers.

Dev looks at the ground, scratching the back of his neck. “Uh, you wanna, Philippa?”

Philippa flicks her eyes over to me for a second. I’m not sure what she hopes to see. Honestly, I feel kinda bad for not being what she wants me to be for her. I look down, because I’m not sure what else to do.

“Sure,” Philippa replies.

I lift my head just enough to see what happens. Dev and Philippa crawl towards the centre of the circle. They both look very nervous, both lacking in experience or alcohol or probably both. He leans forward, eyes closed and lips pursed. She does the same and closes the distance. The kiss barely lasts half a second, but drunk people still cheer like it’s a Manchester FC game. Dev and Philippa scramble to their seats with bright red faces.

Philippa spins the bottle without saying anything. I’m barely following at this point. Pretty sure I’m going to leave after this and go stuff mint aero bars in my mouth. That’s the best breakup therapy in my opinion. I hope Baz hasn’t eaten my entire stash.

“Simon?” Penny taps my shoulder forcefully. “Simon, it landed on you.”

My head snaps up, only to see everyone staring at me, some looking very confused and concerned. I look down at the vodka bottle, the top pointing right at me. My eyes go wide. “Oh,” I squeak.

Philippa is blushing all the way down to her neck,with a small smile. She plays with the end of her hair. “Do you want to?” she asks.

I gulp, fiddling with my fingers. I’m nervous, but not really reluctant. Philippa is nice enough and I know she likes me. Maybe it’ll be nice, maybe I’ll feel something. What’s the harm?

“Uh, sure,” I say with a slightly forced smile.

Philippa’s smile gets a bit bigger. Fuck, am I leading her on? I don’t want to hurt her. This is a terrible idea, shit. She crawls forward, closing her eyes and sticking her face out. I shuffle towards her, squeeze my eyes shut, and kiss her.

It’s slightly longer than her kiss with Dev, but not by much. Long enough for me to realise her lips are smooth and smell like vanilla. Other than that I feel...nothing. It’s not that Philippa is bad. I just don’t feel a spark or anything close. I used to feel something with Agatha. Not a lot, but there was a stomach drop or a heart flutter at first. Not now. Part of me is scared I’ll never find anything like that again.

We separate, everyone is still making their obnoxious cheers. They’re laughing and smiling, so I try to smile back. The only person not so happy is, weirdly enough, Baz. He’s got his arms crossed and the corners of his mouth threaten to break out of his cheeks just so his scowl can get bigger. What’s got his knickers in a twist? Maybe he has a crush on Philippa. Well, pissing him off is a benefit I guess.

“Your turn, Simon,” Philippa says meekly, smiling and blushing at the ground.

“Um...” For a minute, I seriously consider standing up and running like the wind. But everyone is looking at me. I guess one more time couldn’t hurt. “Okay.”

I grab the bottle and give it a firm spin. But I guess I’m slightly on an angle, because it spins to the left like a wayward football. People scramble away to not get hit, giggling and clinging to their friends. I’m just focused on where it lands. The sooner it’s done, the sooner I can bow out gracefully and stuff my face with chocolate. It slows bit by bit, and finally, it stops. I snap my head up to see who it landed on. I’m met with a pair of panicked deep sea grey eyes.

Oh fuck.

Baz

That’s it, God hates me. There’s absolutely no question now. Of all the people he could’ve landed on, why did it have to be me?! This is an absolute disaster. Panic washes over my body like a nonstop tidal wave. Dev laughs and slaps me on the back, like this is some football goal at a match. I want to shout at him for being a numpty and run away to a very dark corner where I can just die.

But I’m frozen, staring at a gaping Simon Snow.

“Oh fuck,” a drunk guy slurs to his friend, trying to whisper but failing horribly, “don’t they like, hate each other?”

Snow’s face shifts from shock to a deep, deep scowl. He jumps to his feet. “Yeah, we do. So this is not happening.”

I manage to stifle my sigh of utter relief, but my silence is probably odd. So I cross my arms and stick my nose in the air. “Good. Like I would ever want to your chavy mouth on mine.”

Fuck, why did I add that last part? I hope I’m not blushing and giving myself away. Snow is turned around, ready to leave, but throws a fiery look at me over his shoulder. “Fuck off, Baz,” he snaps.

“Very eloquent, Snow. Forgot to mention your mouth is stupid too.” Except it’s not stupid. It’s full and soft looking and fucking beautiful, and I wish he wanted to kiss me with it.

Snow balls his fist and looms over me. “Well, your mouth is naturally made for frowning.”

I roll my eyes. “Oh, very nice. Your’s can’t form proper sentences.”

“At least I’m not spouting shit all the time!”

“Either follow the rules of the game or leave, Snow.”

Bunce rubs her nose under her glasses. “Simon, let’s just go.”

She takes his arm but he doesn’t listen to her for once, shaking her off and menacing over me more. “Oh, you want me to kiss you, Basilton?”

Oh fuck fuck fuck, what is wrong with me?! I didn’t drink anything. I think I’ve just lost my goddamn mind. I need to get out of here before I burst into flames from pure embarrassment.

I stand up, brushing off these ridiculous jeans. “Of course not. I would rather go back to our room than have my lips torn up by your dry ones.”

Simon growls like a caged animal. And it should not make me as excited as it does. “My lips are not dry.”

“Guys,” Gareth says slowly, “maybe you should just-”

“The constant bleeding and scabs would disagree.” Leave Snow, for the love of God, just storm off with Bunce, please.

“Oh yeah?” Snow leans forward over the drunk boy in between us. “Well, I bet if I kissed you, you would like it, arsehole.”

If I wasn’t blushing before, I certainly am now. I am literally going to explode on the spot any minute. I scoff and look away.

“Like hell I would.” Yes, I would, and it would be awful.

“Fuck you, you would!”

“Never!” I snap, digging my nails into my arm.

Snow growls once again. “I bet my goddamn sword history book you would!”

He’s leaning closer now, close enough I can smell his cheap soap. It makes my pulse quicken terribly, like the thump of a rabbit’s foot. “It would be easy winnings.”

“Says you!”

“Yes, and I’m right!”

“No you’re not!”

“I am!”

“Why don’t I prove it, huh?!”

“Fine, go ahead!”

I don’t even have time to process what I said. Because Simon Snow immediately grabs my collar and kisses me.

Holy fuck.

Simon

I just want to prove I’m right, and stop his stupid mouth. I hate when he throws insults at me. And now it seems for once I’ve actually shut him up. We’re both frozen in place, me shoving my mouth on his. I faintly hear everyone gasp around us. But I’m too focused on kissing Baz. Oh my fucking god, I’m kissing Baz!

He’s just standing like a statue while I hold his collar with a death grip and squeeze my eyes shut. He’s really not moving at all, not even a twitch. Is he surprised? That would make sense. Scared? I won’t hurt him, not right now. It’s just a kiss.

Baz’s lips are colder than Agatha’s. Softer too. Like silk sheets on a chilly night. It feels kind of nice, actually. When his top lip slightly slips between mine, I swear to god, my brain short circuits. Scratch kind of, this feels really nice. Sensation spreads from my mouth through my whole body. Why does this feel so much better than when I kissed Philippa? Or even better than Agatha? This is so confusing and amazing my brain is about to explode.

I don’t even know how long we spend with our lips pressed together. I tilt my head to the side a bit, just for a change of pace. And even though it’s crazy, I swear, for a moment Baz relaxes and pushes his mouth forward. Pushing his mouth closer to mine. Oh my god. Is...is Baz kissing me back? It feels so much better.

My hands slide around to the back of his neck, and Baz’s hair is soft of course. I think about grabbing it, but Baz suddenly pushes me away. It happens so out of the blue I stumble back in shock. I expect him to be angry, to punch me in the face or at least shout until he’s blue in the face. But Baz, he looks, scared. What’s there to be scared of? His eyes frantically dart around, chest heaving, until he looks back at me. I’ve never seen someone so frightened in my entire life.

Baz turns and bolts away, slamming the door behind him.

The entire room is silent for a long, awkward moment. You could hear a bloody pin drop it’s so quiet. I’m frozen, mouth hanging open. I can’t even process what just happened. So many things are going through my head right now, turning into a mushy goop of mismatched ideas and fears. I look at Penny.

“Pen, I- what just- I...” I can’t form words. My mouth and tongue feel so unbelievably useless, even more so than usual.

“Simon-” she starts. But before I hear what she says, I’m off running. I don’t know why I’m doing it, but I have to follow Baz. I just have to.

———————————————

It takes me way, way too long to find him. I search all throughout the Fraternity before I remember just how bloody dramatic Baz is. He wouldn’t hide away in the building, he’d go to where he always goes when he’s upset. Not his room or an alcove like a normal person. The Wavering Wood.

I run across the great lawn, wind whistling in my ears. The trees get larger and larger until I finally reach the edge. It’s dark out, so I have to navigate mostly by my other senses. I feel rough bark, sink into on wet dirt, hear the leaves crunch beneath my boots. I squint, trying to see in the darkness. And when I catch a glimpse of black shining in the moonlight, I dash towards it.

Baz is sitting under a tree, legs pulled up to his chest, face buried in his knees. Raven hair fans around him. I watch his back heave and shudder. Fuck. I don’t think he’s okay.

Slowly, I walk towards him, careful not to make too much noise. I don’t want to spook him, no more than he already is. But of course I step on a fucking branch, the snap ringing through the whole goddamn woods. Baz’s head bolts up. His eyes are wide and scared like a deer caught in the headlights. Tear streaks stain his cheeks. We keep staring at each other, until Baz looks back at the ground.

“What do you want, Snow?” he asks. He’s trying to be intimidating, but his voice is too strained to scare me.

“I, uh...” Fuck, what do I want? Why am I here? I’m not Baz’s friend. Quite the opposite, really. Yet it hurts to see him like this, so I start walking towards him, fiddling with my belt hole loops. “I wanted to see how you were doing. You um, ran out of there pretty fast...”

He snorts unkindly. “That wasn’t an invitation for you to follow, Snow.”

I groan, rolling my head back. “Man, I’m actually trying to be nice, there’s no need to be an arsehole.”

“Since when do you care about me?”

I shrug as I sit down on the grassy ground. I’m cross legged, facing Baz and his dagger stare. “You looked scared back the party, and then I see you here crying. I’d be worried no matter who you were.”

He rolls his eyes incredibly dramatically. “Of course, Mr. Hero. Any kittens that need to be saved from trees? Probably more pertinent than me.”

“You’re the one crying in the woods, so I think you take top priority.”

Baz tries to wipe away the tear marks, but they stay the same. “It’s nothing.”

“It’s not nothing, you’re obviously upset.”

“No matter what, it’s none of your business.”

I look down at the ground, playing with my shoelace. I know what I want to mean, but I’m not sure how to get the words right. Everything I’m considering seems dumb. Baz will throw anything stupid back in my face. Actually, stupid or not, he’ll throw it back. Might as well just go for it.

“I’m sorry,” I blurt out. I flick my eyes up, and Baz is gaping at me, his eyebrows are all scrunched together.

“You’re...sorry?” he says, genuinely confused for the first time in his life.

I rub the back of my neck. “Y-Yeah, I’m just, really sorry.”

“For what?”

What the hell does he mean? What else could I be talking about? I look right at him. “For like...kissing you when you didn’t want it. It was stupid and impulsive and really rude to you. You should never kiss anyone when they don’t want it. So I’m really sorry.”

“You...think I didn’t want you to kiss me?”

“Um, yeah. I thought you said I could, but then you ran out of there pretty fast afterwards. So I’m just super sorry, Baz.”

There’s a long stretch of silence, only filled by wind whistling through the branches. I keep looking at the ground. I’m not sure what Baz’s expression, and I’m not sure I want to see. I hope he’s forgiven me. I honestly don’t know what to do if he doesn’t.

“Thank you, for the apology,” he says slowly. “But you don’t have to feel bad.”

My head snaps up. Baz is looking away now. And in the pale moonlight, I can see a faint blush going all the way to his ears. I’m not worried anymore, just unbelievably confused. “W-What do you mean?”

Baz plays with the hem of his shirt. “I mean, I’m not upset that you kissed me without my permission, because you had it. I did say you could. We both made an impulsive decision.”

“Then why did you run off so fast?”

He twists the hem so hard I’m afraid he’s going to tear it. “Because, it’s just embarrassing to have your first kiss in front of your entire class, no matter who it is.”

My eyes go impossibly huge. I swear they become bigger than the moon. Holy fucking shit. “That back there was your first kiss?”

His blush gets worse, spreading down to his neck. Baz has always been so cool and calm. I’ve never seen him like this before. It’s strange, but kind of makes him seem more human in a way. He nods slowly.

“Oh,” I squeak. I inch closer, trying to comfort him, before remembering that I’m the last person Baz wants comfort from. Especially after I embarrassed him. God, I feel like a prat. “I-I’m still sorry then. I didn’t mean to take that away from you.”

“Stop saying sorry, Snow,” he sighs. “It’s really fine.”

“Really?”

“Yes. I was okay with it, because I li-” His lips press together before he says anything else. He plays with a loose strand of his hair, looking nervous and shy, still blushing so hard his entire face is red. The gears start turning in my head. I’m not as oblivious as everyone thinks I am. I can see things, they can just take a bit longer. And I think I see something very big now.

“Wait,” I say slowly, “do you...like me?”

Baz bites hard on his bottom lip and clenches his fists. A few more tears fall down his cheeks, but he doesn’t wipe them away, not even acknowledging they exist. My mouth drops open.

“For how long? Have you, uh, felt like that?”

He finally looks at me, his eyes wet and vulnerable. I’ve never seen him like this before, not ever. He doesn’t look like a villain, or a bully, or even an arsehole. He just looks like...a boy.

“A long time,” he whispers harshly, like he’s forcing the words off his tongue. “Almost since we met.”

And I thought I was done with surprises for the night. My heart is beating twofold, but I’m not sure with what emotion. Everything is so jumbled and twisted up right now. “O-Oh. Really?”

Baz rolls his eyes, though he looks more annoyed than genuinely angry. “Yes, really. You think I would make that up?”

“I don’t know! I’m not sure I know anything about you anymore...” I nervously scratch at the back of my wrist until the skin turns red. Nothing is processing, nothing makes sense. And one question pops up immediately. “If you feel that way, why have you always been such a wanker?”

Baz lets out a small snorty laugh, and immediately covers his mouth. But it’s kind of adorable. And I kind of want to hear it again. “Very well put question, Snow.”

“Are you gonna answer it or keep being a wanker?” I’m not angry, just tired really.

“Fine,” he sighs. He goes back to twisting his hair and shirt, chewing on the corner of his pouty lip. “I was a wanker because it was easier.”

“Easier?”

His face lowers even more, nearly behind his knees. “Easier for you to hate me, than for me to confess my stupid feelings and innevitably have you break my heart.”

I feel like I’ve been punched in the gut, almost offended that he thought I would be so cruel. But Baz looks even more hurt. I think that his feelings matter more right now. “Oh. Okay. You thought I would really hurt you?”

“You were straight as an arrow and already madly in love with Wellbelove when we were 11.” He traces the dirt with his toe, scuffing the pretty white trainer. “You would’ve hurt me even if you didn’t mean to.”

“Oh,” I squeak.

Baz scoffs with the corner of his mouth pulled up. “That’s your favourite sound tonight, Snow.”

I let out a sort of scoffing chuckle. He’s an arse, but funny. I’ve never noticed how funny he can be in his own biting way before. “Well, you keep dropping bombshells, it’s perfectly reasonable. Honestly you’re lucky I’m not exploding everywhere.”

He laughs, still small, but doesn’t cover his mouth. He doesn’t hide. “Yes, well, cleaning up bits of you off the forest floor wouldn’t be my favourite activity. It would be more fun than your snoring though.”

“I don’t snore!”

“Yes you do, I would know. You’re like an adorable little fog horn.”

We both laugh, starting small and getting louder and louder. Baz even begins to giggle, fucking giggle. He sounds like a thousand little silver bells. I shouldn’t be laughing. Usually I would be offended by his jabs. I’d yell and scream at him for being a dick. But he’s laughing, smiling, all with a playful glint in his deep grey eyes. I wonder, is this what Baz is really like? When he isn’t trying to make me hate him?

“I like this,” I blurt out. Baz stops laughing immediately. A confused furrow forms between his brows.

“Like what?” he asks cautiously.

“This, right now, what we’re doing. Being nice and honest.” I shuffle closer, knees nearly touching his. “I like this better than fighting.”

Baz’s pouty lips fall open slightly, just barely half an inch, and his eyebrows raise. I think that’s Baz’s equivalent of completely, utterly shocked. “Seriously?”

I grin as wide as I can. “Yeah, seriously. Do you, uh, like it too?”

I expect Baz to smile, to laugh, to be happy. But instead he looks scared. Even his hands are shaking. I reach forward, but Baz pulls away, wrapping his arms around himself. Another tear falls down his face but he quickly wipes it away.

“Why were you crying?” I ask quickly. “Was it just like, embarrassment?”

Baz slowly shakes his head, more black hair falling in his face in a lazy wave. “N-No, it’s just...this can’t be happening.”

“What do you mean?”

“You haven’t stopped hating me, that can’t change.”

His voice is so small and scared. I blink rapidly, tilting my head to the side. “Why not?”

He scoffs and shakes his head, staring at his own lap. “Because I’ve made your life hell for years! Because one stupid kiss and a few laughs can’t change things after so long.”

I move even closer. I can see every crevice in his face the moonlight hits, every sign of his tears. Oh. I think I get it, sorta. I kissed him, and Baz wanted it, but he was sad because he was sure it would never happen again. That’s a reasonable conclusion. At least, it was.

“Maybe it can’t change everything right away. But,” I reach forward and touch his wrist, just lightly, and when he doesn’t move away I stay there, “we could try, y’know. To change things.”

He doesn’t look up, but his brows wrinkle together again, and I find it unbearably adorable. “What are you saying, Snow?”

“I’m saying I want to be your boyfriend.” I say quickly before I lose my nerve. “I mean, I’m not a very great boyfriend, if my last relationship is any clue. But if you want this, I want this.”

I stare at the ground, too nervous to look at Baz’s face. I don’t let go of his wrist though, and he doesn’t move away, but it’s still silent again. Every passing second makes my anxiety build up and up like a shaken soda about to blow. Will he run away? He ran away before. I don’t want him to go, not again. I don’t want to lose him. (Fuck, that’s dramatic.)

“You’re an idiot,” Baz sighs, and it makes my breath hitch. “But you can have...this, if you want.”

My head snaps up so fast my neck hurts. Baz is finally looking at me, eyes soft and open. I’ve never seen him like that before. A grin spreads across my face. I probably look stupid but I couldn’t care less.

“I do,” I say, “I really do.”

He smiles softly. Slowly, he turns his hand around and fully holds mine. His skin is colder than most people’s and strangely rough for someone so posh. His calluses scratch perfectly against mine. It feels incredible, somehow so much better than holding anyone else’s hand. Just like that kiss.

“Hey, uh,” I nervously run my thumb over his tepid skin, “can I, um, maybe...kiss you again? Like in a nicer way?”

Baz chuckles, squeezing my hand. “Yes, you lovely moron, you may. If we’re going to date, you need to fix your gram-”

I get up on my knees and shut his cute smartarse mouth by pressing mine against it.

Baz

Bloody hell, I think I’ve died and gone to heaven. Because for the second time in one night, Simon Snow is kissing me. And this time he really wants to, because he likes me, because he wants to be my boyfriend.

It’s not forceful or angry like before, just firm enough to get me to stop mocking him. I freeze for a moment, the shock hitting me like a truck. But slowly, bit by bit, I let myself melt into it. Snow tilts his head to the side, so I do too, letting our lips slip together. Simon does this thing with his chin that drives me insane. At first I try to mimic exactly what he does, shoving back with my body and mouth, but I quickly realise I have zero idea what I’m doing. For once, Snow is the expert. So I let myself relax, giving up control for the first time in my life. Snow pushes me against the tree and places a hand on the side of my face. He delicately runs his thumb over my cheekbone, like I’m something good, something precious to him. Is this a fucking dream?

His hand moves farther back. Calloused fingers slip through my hair as his tongue slips between my lips. It’s warm and wet and the best thing I’ve ever felt in my entire miserable life.

“Baz,” he sighs quietly between our mouths.

No, this isn’t a dream. My imagination has never been this perfect.

I wrap my arms around his waist, pulling him flush against me. “Simon,” I groan. He kisses me harder, clenching a fist in my hair to better shove our faces together. Suddenly my breath feels short, and I push lightly at Simon’s chest. He moves away instantly.

“Sorry,” he says. He’s out of breath, unsurprisingly. I am too.

“No it’s okay, just,” I sigh and run my hands up his sides, “this is quite a lot for a second kiss. I just need a breather.

Simon giggles quietly. He falls forward, tapping his forehead against mine. I press my hands into his back, feeling the muscles through his shirt. We stay like that for awhile. I don’t mind. I would stay with Simon in my arms forever if I could.

“Hey,” he whispers, eyes still closed and leaning against me, “I’ve got a question.”

“Is it a sensical question?”

He pinches the back of my neck, just lightly. Not enough to hurt but enough to make his annoyance clear. “Yes, arsehole. Why were you at the party? You hate parties.”

“So do you.”

“Penny dragged me to it to have mandatory fun. So what’s your reason?”

I chuckle quietly. “Funny enough, Dev begged me to come with him because he wanted support for when he hit on your ex-girlfriend.”

Snow reels back, eyes wide and mouth falling open. “Seriously?!”

“M-hm.”

“But Agatha didn’t even come!”

“Yup. So it looks like I’ve had far more romantic success tonight than my cousin.”

Snow snorts out an adorable laugh. His hand trails forward across my jawline. It leaves sparks of sensation on my skin. He plays with a piece of loose hair in front of my face. “Y’know, I like your hair like this. You should leave it loose more often. Save some money on hair gel.”

I chuckle again, and Snow follows. Soon it turns into a loud laughter from both of us. I’ve never laughed more in my life than I have tonight. Once I calm down, I look up at him, smiling brightly. “M-hm. And you’re someone to take fashion advice from?”

A small part of me worries Snow is going to scowl and yell at me for being a prick. But instead he smiles too and rolls his eyes. I let out a small breath of relief. Everything is different now, and I love it so much more.

“Yeah, well, I know a good thing when I see it.” His hands goes lower, trailing over the soft v-neck. “Like this shirt. It fits you well.”

“Really?” I croon, trying to hide the fact that I’m exploding inside.

“Uh-huh. And these jeans. I nearly had a heart attack when I saw you in them.”

I grin so much my cheeks happily ache. “Well, I’ll let Niall know you like his clothes.”

His mouth drops open. “This is Niall’s stuff?!”

I cock an eyebrow. “You think I own clothes like this?”

“Well, no. But I, uh, kind of wish you did. You should definitely buy more jeans...”

His cheeks are cherry red. I’m pretty sure mine are too. I hold his waist tighter, tilting my head up towards his. “I’ll be sure to get some on my next trip into town.”

He smiles again, looking like a ray of sunshine. “Can I come with?”

God, he’s like an adorable little puppy. “I don’t see why not, Snow.”

He leans forward and brushes our noses together. “You called me Simon before.”

“No I didn’t,” I singsong.

Snow pushes even closer to me, warm lips against my ear. “I like it,” he whispers. “I like it when you call me Simon.”

How have I not melted into the forest floor yet? I don’t feel like a real person anymore. Just the remnants of a pathetic gay teenager who’s melted into a puddle after having all his dreams come true in a single night. I hold him tighter. Because I’m not letting him go anytime soon.

“Simon,” I sigh, just before I turn my head and kiss him softly. He reciprocates immediately, and I’m in absolute euphoria. I know we have to move eventually but I don’t want to anytime soon.

“Best spin the bottle game ever,” Simon giggles.

“Damn right,” I whisper, just before pulling him back into a searing kiss.

My god, I’m living a charmed life.

———————————————

AN: Main worry with this fic: I feel like things move too quickly, but at the same time I didn't want to drag it out. Like we all know what's going to happen, best not to beat around the bush lol. Either way, this has flaws like anything I write, but I still like it. I thoroughly enjoyed writing Simon's reaction to Baz in tshirt and jeans lol. Hope you peeps liked it too, see you next fic :)

[tamtam-go92]

Pleasantview +25 years recap

Pleasantview +25 years is my attempt at joining all my favorite families through out the franchise in one save. I've spent about four days in creating over 45 families that populate all of the worlds I have in The Sims 4. And when I say I created them, I actually mean I downloaded them from the gallery. =//) I'm not particularly good at creating Sims... Willow Creek are only Pleasantview Sims, Oasis Springs are mostly Strangetown Sims, Newcrest are mostly rich Sims from all the games, San Myshuno is everyone I didn't know where to locate them, mostly single Sims, and Banacle Bay are the creative and LGBT Sims. I also really need to thank @homijoh for sharing her rule set with us some time ago. I loved it and I'm using it for this rotational game play. For more information (I warn you, A LOT of Information since I tell a thing or two about every family) look behind the cut!

Willow Creek:

Broke I Household: Brandi, Beau and Skip Junior – Brandi never remarried and did an okay job at raising three boys on her own.

Broke II Household: Dustin, Angela, Susan, Mitch, Melinda, Brad – Dustin had got Angela pregnant as a teen and from that day on, their relationship went downhill. Why they are still together? Probably because of their four children.

Burb Household: John, Jennifer, Michael – Michael is the recreation of a son the Burbs had once in my game. Never forgot him =)

Dreamer Household: Dirk, Lilith, Hugo, Irmi – Hugo and Irmi are twins and their parent's whole proud.

Dreamer-Goth Household: Darren, Cassandra, Manuel, Daniela, Dorothee – After a bad divorce from Don Lothario, Cassandra found true love in Darren Dreamer and they had two girls. Darren took her son with Don in, like his own flesh.

Goth Household: Alexander, Lucy, Agatha – Alex and Lucy are too buzy with their career to care for their only daughter Agatha.

Goth-Caliente Household: Dina, Nina, Simon, Enrique – Dina inherited Goth Manor from her decreased husband Mortimer and took her sister and nephew in.

Langerak-Pleasant Household: Daniel, Kaylynn, Trina, Zelda – After leaving Mary-Sue for the Maid, Daniel wouldn't have thought to ever hear teenage girls fight again, yet here he is!

Lothario Household: Don, Bianca – Don was a d*ck to women and here he is, estranged from his two sons. After an abduction by aliens and the birth of his daughter Bianca Don suddenly saw clear regarding his sexuality.

Oldie Household: Mary-Sue is divorced and moved back in with her parents. Since 25 years she's bickering with her elderly mother.

Oasis Springs:

Beaker Household: Loki, Circe, Atom, Ceres – With his clone children Loki could save Circe from a pregnancy and yet have his perfect family!

Curious Household: Pascal, Vidcund, Lazlo, Crystal, Tycho, Techna, Erik, Marie – Crystal has no idea how she managed to live with her brothers in law and their strange kids for over 20 years.

Grunt Household: Ripp, Buck, Jill, Ralf – People say the older sibling should be responsible for the younger siblings. Tell that Ripp Grunt...

Landgraab Household: Nancy, Geoffrey, Malcolm – Just the normal Sims 4 Landgraab family.

Loner Household: Ajay, Erin, Vincent, Linus – Ajay married Erin Beaker and had two boys with her.

Roomies Household: Zoe, Mitchel, J, Gavin – Just the normal Sims 4 Roomies household.

Smith Household: Johnny, Ophelia, Sally, Ginny, Ben, Dora – The only problem of this family is, which of the girls should share their room with their baby sister.

Zugovich Household: A family introduced in the Sims pet stories. Just a little gag to add some fresh blood.

Newcrest:

Alto Household: Holly II, Don, Trenton – My interpretation is, that the Holly Alto from DS is the daughter of the Holly Alto from The Sims 3. Trenton is a Sim from Lunar Lakes.

Capp Household: Juliette, Romeo, Cleo, Linea – Juliette married her big love, she had her happy ending with her Romeo.

Jacquet Household: Gilbert, Florence, Sébastian – I never really shipped those two, but I wanted to include both.

Summerdream Household: Bottom, Hal, Fiona – Hal and Bottom usually end up together in my game and make a decent couple.

Worthington Household: Frances J- III, Joyce, Frances J. IV – Frances has his trophy wife and a beautiful daughter to keep the name alive.

San Myshuno:

Bunch Household: Mary – Mary is a descendant of the Sunset Valley Bunches.

Elson Household: Craig II – Craig is named after his great-grandfather from Starlight Shores.

Fair-weather Friends Household: Keiko, Mateo, Anthony, Holly – Just the household form the gallery.

Gieke Household: Chester, Testee – Chester lives a life in retreat with his alien daughter.

Inkbeard Household: Opal, Jane – Opal is a descendant of the Barnacle Bay Inkbeard family and Jane is her wife.

Karaoke Legends Household: Miko, Darling, Akira – Just the normal Karaoke Legends Household from The Sims 4.

Newon Household: Garrett – Garrett Newson looked for a life in solitude after growing up in a crowded place.

Pancakes Household: Bob, Eliza, Igga – The Sims 4 Pancakes family with their gallery son Iggy just moved to San Myshuno.

Patel Household: Ramir, Ana, Louis, Maya, Mali, Kirian – The Patels form Belladonna Cove with their four children. They aren't related with Zoe Patel from Oasis Springs.

Sekemoto Household: Cecila, Len – Cecilia is the grand-daughter of Sam Sekemoto. I created her a long time ago in the Sims 2 and there she became Alexander Goth's wife (his wife in the DS version is called Cecilia. But now she's only the mother of Len Sekemoto, a Sim from Lunar Lakes.

Sims Household: John – Your average white guy next door and son of the tutorial Sims.

Tricou Household: Orion – Always a loner Orion lives in an almost empty penthouse.

Vatore Household: Caleb, Lilith – The Vatore family from Forgotten Hollow. I don't have Vampires, so they are just some ordinary Gothics.

Xio Household: Tian – He's from Shang Simala and just recently moved to San Myshuno.

Yuan Household: Kien – After a successful career as a k-pop icon, Kien retired in San Myshuno.

Brindleton Bay:

Climate Household: Arthur, Janine, Summer, Nicolas – Just the normal Climate family from the gallery.

Delgato Household: Supriya, Justin, Pierce, Evie – Just the normal Sims 4 Delgato family.

GilsCarbo Household: Goopy, Alice, Celeste – Everybody's favorite townie with his Sims 3 family.

Hecking Household: Just the ordinary Sims 4 Hecking family.

Lynx Household: Just the ordinary Sims 4 Lynx family.

Monty Household: Mercutio, Tybalt – After their hate turned into love, those two ran away together and now own a huge mansion in Brindleton Bay.

Ottomas Household: David – After growing up with much to many siblings, all David wanted to be was alone.

Una Household: Natasha, Joana – Nobody ever knew who Joana's father was. It's totally wasn't obvious!

I haven’t played much until now, only about 36 hours with the Broke I household. I suspect it to be a bit buggy with SO many sims (it’s already 147) but I hope my PC can handle it. I’m really excited to play this!

[prairiechzhead]

PrairieChzHead Rewatches Poldark S3 Legally--US Ep 6/UK Ep 7.

I’m going to come right out and say it: this episode is my least favorite of S3. It made me feel things. Bad things. Bad as in angry things. Once scene in particular still makes me feel stabby. This is the first time I rewatched it since last July. 

When I submitted my answers for this one to the @poldarkpodcast, I tried to not mention that Thing That Made Me Stabby, but unfortunately, the stabby feeling would not go away, nor would it calm down. 

Let’s see if I calmed down since last July, shall we? 

What did you think of this week’s episode?

This episode made me angry. If and when I rewatch this one, I’m going to have to have copious amounts of alcohol with me in order to get through it.

No booze this time, although the first time I rewatched I was sitting with a tennis ball digging into my lower back because my muscles tensed up from bending over in the shower when I was shaving my legs. It’s supposed to help work the knots out. 

The second time I rewatched it, my lower back was still hurting and I’d slathered enough Salonpas (aka Wasabi Ben-Gay) over where the muscles were knotted up to make my eyes water. 

(Not that my back problems have anything to do with Poldark, but I’ve been having back problems lately.) 

After rewatching, I think I’m more depressed than angry. Almost everyone was miserable in this episode. 

Your favourite? Why?

The final confrontation between George and Agatha. The acting between Caroline and Jack was phenomenal.

This is still my favorite scene. George ruins Agatha’s party, but Agatha gets the last word, in a manner of speaking, because she gets into George’s head and plants doubts about Valentine’s parentage. 

There is a bit I saw on the DVD where little Clowance grabs a toy cow from Jeremy and I swear the little girl who plays her had a smirk of triumph on her face, which made me smile. 

Least favourite? Why?

When Ross learned that Agatha died and all Demelza could do was bitch at him about George becoming MP. I’m still LIVID over her behavior. Demelza is someone who has a quiet strength and grace, which is the perfect foil for Ross and his moodiness and impulsiveness. She is not submissive in the books. At least I didn’t feel she was. This Demelza is anything but that. I’m confused as to why Demelza would be surprised or angry that Ross would not want to be an MP. She’s always complaining that he’s never home. He hates the constraints of his social class, which he would be held to even more as MP than he is now. Ross is a grassroots kind of person and I think he knows this (which explains why he gifted land to the village and basically started Cornwall’s first CSA). He hates parties and balls and all that stuff and he’d be expected to go to more of those. She’s been married to him for 8 years or so. Shouldn’t she know this about him? Part of the speech she made in S2 E9 about her pride in Ross was that he was not like other men of his class. But now she wants him to be someone he’s not? Is this how the writers are going to justify her affair with Lord Byron, I mean, Hugh? Lord, I hope not.

Ross’s remark about men not paying attention to Demelza was annoying, but it annoyed me because it was a heavy-handed way for the writers to get across the point from the books that Ross took for granted Demelza would never act on the attention that she received from other men. That could have been handled better.

This final scene would be That Thing That Made Me Stabby. 

I have this emotional trigger about seeing people basically crap all over or pile on someone who is hurting emotionally or in an emotionally vulnerable place. Especially if the person taking that emotional crap is a spouse, significant other, or a parent. 

Let’s just say that this behavior hits too close to home and that I was the one being crapped on. It is tone-deaf, self-centered, and just hurtful to basically ignore and dismiss someone else’s feelings as if they don’t matter. 

That it is Demelza doing this is especially galling to me. This is the same woman who went to Trenwith and took care of Francis, Elizabeth, & Geoffrey Charles when they all had the putrid throat, despite the fact that Francis had called her a trull and basically banned her from Trenwith for her part in Verity’s elopement in S1. This despite the fact that she was jealous and wary of Elizabeth. This is the action of someone who is selfless and giving and compassionate, which is what Demelza is and what makes her such a strong, likable character in the novels (and the show).  

The woman who went to the beach to berate her grieving husband over something that could have waited, is not the real Demelza. The woman who would not allow herself to be baited by George, was baited by George. She is not the real Demelza. She is Pod Demelza. 

What is Pod Demelza? If you’ve ever seen Invasion of the Body Snatchers (or as Monday Night Football commentator Jon Gruden calls it, “that body snatchers movie”), you know what I mean. Pod Demelza is a fraudulent double put in to take the place of the Real Demelza, who was probably abducted by aliens or something like that. 

Ross’s remark in the show about men not paying attention to Demelza is heavy-handed and I still think it is heavy-handed. However, due to the time constraints on the TV adaptation, there is not enough time for DH to gradually develop the Very Bad Thing 2: Electric Boogaloo Story. 

Novel spoilers ahead. 

In the Four Swans, as Demelza’s attraction to Hugh grows, she is upfront about this to Ross. At the same time, Ross doesn’t seem bothered by what she is telling him because he takes for granted that she would never act on her attraction. When she does, and he suspects that she has, it affects him in such a way, the consequences spill into the next book. 

However, since DH is not given the time needed to develop this properly, we get Ross making asshat remarks like this. 

So while, as a woman, this annoys the piss out of me (and my middle finger would have suddenly gone upright), as a viewer who has also read the novels, I get why it’s necessary to have Ross say things like this. 

I still want to flip a bird, but it’s easier to resist the urge. 

Favourite new character? Why?

Emma. I think Sam has met his match. :)

I love Emma. I love her sass. The storyline with her and Sam will come to a head in S4, but I’m not that thrilled that their storyline got short-shrifted in S3. I would have liked to see more of Sassy Emma and Pious Sam. 

Least favourite new character? Why? New and Improved Season 3 Demelza® ! Now with 75% more feistiness!.  If being selfless and kind and compassionate means you’re being a housewife and in the background, then please, let Demelza be a housewife again. It’s like there is virtually no trace of the Demelza from S1 that selflessly went to Trenwith and took care of Francis, Elizabeth, and Geoffrey Charles when they had the putrid throat because she couldn’t bear to know that they were suffering. There’s no trace of the Demelza, who, in the middle of her marital woes with Ross in S2, put that aside to console him when the mine caved in. Instead, we’re left with a snarky, bitchy, shallow person who answers to Demelza Poldark, but doesn’t resemble the woman who is Ross’s counterbalance, partner, and sounding board. Demelza of Old would not have run after Ross to bitch at him about not accepting the offer to be MP when he found out his oldest living relative just passed away. Prudie showed more compassion towards Ross when he learned of Agatha’s passing than his own wife did.  

I will not apologize for hating Pod Demelza. Never. Never ever, not ever. George put that bit in the letter in order to bait Ross and Demelza fell for it. 

If I had to pick a different least favorite new character, it would be Rowella, because I know her storyline. She’s a conniver, that girl. (Although in her defense, she is conniving against Reverend Toe Sucker, and he gets what he deserves.) 

Ossie is gross and nasty and vile. Horribly, horribly vile. 

What made you cheer?

Dwight and Caroline’s 30 seconds of screen time. I’ve given up on them getting any substantial storyline in this series, so I’m going to take whatever moments of screen time I can get and cherish them.

Also...

The bit when Armitage was going to go up to Demelza at the Carolight Nuptials but Ross cut him off, leaving Lord Byron to stare forlornly at the two departing figures. That made me cheer. 

What made you want to throw things at the television/computer screen?

Demelza. I don’t know what the writers did with the Demelza of old, but I’m not liking season 3 Demelza very much and this episode just cemented all the reasons why. Demelza is supposed to be a grown-ass woman and mother of two kids, but suddenly she is acting like an immature teen-aged girl. It felt to me that Demelza was constantly trying to pick fights with Ross. One example, from a conversation I was in about this on Tumblr, was that it seemed like she would bring up something prickly, like Valentine’s rickets for example, and then when Ross wouldn’t react the way she expected, she would get angry with him. From what I’ve seen so far, I’m not liking the direction of how this Demelza/Hugh thing is panning out. There were some conversations in the books between Ross and Demelza in this particular story thread that I would love to see acted out on screen, but I doubt that those conversations fit within the “Ross is ignoring me so I’ll find another man who will give me attention” storyline.

Three months later and this scene still makes feel things. I still want to hurl things, but not necessarily heavy things. 

A second thing that made me want to throw things at my TV was when other people *cough, cough* Lord Falmouth & Hugh Armitage *cough, cough* who hijacked the Carolight show wedding and made it about Ross, who was clearly embarrassed about this. (But yes, I do get that the wedding is supposed to be a “stand in” for other parties in the novel, and the excessive praise for Ross happened at another party.) Dwight can toast whomever he wants because it’s his wedding. The others...well, it’s pretentious and rude. 

A third thing that makes me still want to throw things at my TV is the “whose Valentine’s Daddy” speculation. There was no talk or speculation about Valentine’s baby daddy in the novels until Agatha got into George’s head and George’s behavior towards Valentine and Elizabeth changed. So then, out of nowhere, Demelza brings up Valentine having rickets and Dwight treating the child. She does this as if she suspects that Ross is Valentine’s father, and when she gets irritated because he doesn’t care like she thinks he should, I’m feeling the stabbiness return. 

In order to make the Demelza/Hugh thing plausible for TV, they have to make Demelza have a reason to be ticked off enough at Ross to go out and roll in the dunes with Armitage. I hate this in general, but I specifically hate this because it has Demelza picking a fight when that is out of character. She gets annoyed and they argue, but I don’t recall her purposely picking fights in the novel. However, Ross, in this instance is still true to the novels in that he neither knows nor speculates on Valentine’s parentage. He doesn’t until the church scene in Four Swans and even then, it doesn’t occur to him when Elizabeth brings it up. 

A fourth thing that makes me want to throw things at the TV is not that Demelza feels Ross is ignoring her. It’s how she reacts--that she is behaving so passive-aggressively and at times, looking for reasons to be ticked off with him. But she won’t tell him what is wrong. I dislike people who do this. It’s so manipulative and childish. 

A fifth thing that makes me want to throw things at the TV is that Demelza wants Ross to be an MP, even though in the novels, she agreed with his decision to turn down Bassett’s offer because she knew he would chafe at being on someone else’s leash and having to bend to someone else’s will. 

A sixth thing that makes me want to throw things at the TV is Hugh contriving to be invited to a party thrown by Francis Basset even though his uncle, Lord Falmouth and Bassett hate each other. Subtle, Hugh. Real subtle. You’re as subtle as the air in a room full of people after they ate Taco Bell. 

By the way, that party looked deadly, deadly dull. I can’t blame Ross for not wanting to go. 

I know, the books are not supposed to be the same as the show. But once you read the novels, you get very attached to these characters and when you see them being out of character, it can make one feel strong feelings. I can overlook some things, but not others. 

What was your performance of the week? Jack Farthing & Caroline Blakiston and how they performed the final confrontation between George and Agatha. This is one of those scenes from the book I was looking forward to seeing on the show and both of them delivered.

I will miss their barbed exchanges. I am glad that the final exchange was true to the books and that the outcome, Agatha getting into George’s head, which is her having the last word, happened. Also, George’s “there will be no party” was spot on. You could literally feel the hatred between the two characters. 

Bravo and well-done! 

Any other observations you wish to share with us!

Sam is growing on me. :)

I liked that Elizabeth referred to Agatha as “my aunt” when Agatha died. Technically she wasn’t her aunt, but it’s one of those little things that shows that Elizabeth did still care about Agatha. It’s also one of those little moments that show us Elizabeth’s humanity, especially after her seeming to cross over to the Dark Side.

I know that Elizabeth is not a nice character. But it’s nice that they showed that she did care about Agatha. 

Sam had to grow on me because his religious fervor is more heavy-handed than it is in the novels, and that heavy-handedness can be off-putting. 

I’ve felt that the season 3 episodes were rushed. With the edits that PBS makes, the episodes feel rushed and choppy. The slight edits (the one or two seconds shaved here and there) are more noticeable than they were in S2. The larger edits are especially noticeable.

My local PBS station starts with their local sponsors at 7:58 pm. The "previously on Poldark” and the national sponsors begin at 8:00 pm. The actual opening credits start at 8:02. 

Also, there was a new donor this week, one Carol Vasiladis. I wonder if she’ll ever get to tell us in person how much she enjoys Masterpiece Theater. 

Demelza still comes off as a stroppy, snarky teenager, which is totally opposite of her characterization in the novels, but it’s more pronounced in this episode. I still hate this and I always will.

Also, I just listened to Four Swans on Audible.com as I am rewatching this episode, and it’s making the things I dislike about Demelza’s characterization even worse than when I first saw this episode.

Like I said, when you read the novels, you get very attached to the story and the characters. 

And Favorite Aunt Agatha memory #RIPAuntAgatha

There are so many Agatha moments to like. I think the thing I will miss the most about Aunt Agatha is her running commentary. She’s like a living, breathing episode of Mystery Science Theater 3000. 

There are many Agatha moments I love. But I think this one will always be my favorite because it sums up her sassiness. (Plus there’s Bonus Francis footage, because I miss Francis. I think everyone misses Francis.) 

Next week is US Ep 7/ UK Episode 8. We’re getting deeper into the Hugh Armitage storyline, which is not one of my favorite things in the novels. It’s really not one of my favorite things on the show. It’s also the second to last episode of Season 3, which also means that the December Pledge drive is coming up. 

[suckerforhobi]

Triste Pt.03

Triste: sad; mournful; dismal; depressed

Pairing: Taehyung x Reader

ANGST ANGST ANGST, occasional smut and fluff

Inspired by the anime called Kuzu no Honkai.

Pt.01   Pt.02

“Good joke Taehyung. I can see why did you join the drama club last year.” I laughed nervously. It was true, Taehyung loved acting even in middle school he had played several main roles, it was one of his passions besides singing. If someone wanted to do a musical, Taehyung was an ideal candidate for the male lead.

Taehyung still had a serious expression and that got me worried. He was joking, wasn’t he?

His face remained didn’t change a bit which made me even more nervous. Taehyung was weird sometimes, everybody knew that but he wouldn’t say that to annoy me. How did he think about that? We just kissed once. Once. We were both sad and misunderstood teens, we eased after the swarm of emotions got us almost sick. But it was a way of comforting, nothing else. 

“I’m not joking.” He said, his eyes piercing into my pair. “We could just use each other. For fun.”

“So you just want to act all lovey-dovey with a girl to mend your little heart? Thanks, no. Search for someone else.”

“Y/N...I...” He wanted to say but once again, I interrupted him, his puppy eyes didn’t fool me as much as he wanted me to fall for those.

“Taehyung you know... I hate you. You hate me. I think you can do better and find a cutie girl for this task. Why do you want a fake girlfriend? I don’t see your point. You can’t be together with her but you can’t be that desperate, boy.”

The colour of his face faded away. “I don’t hate you.” I heard him muttering.

“Maybe but I still don’t like you.” 

I saw his frown deepening and I felt bad for him. I was really a bitch to him.

“Just hear me out, please.” 

I sighed and to my surprise, he seriously seemed to be hurt, after I noticed the tears streaming down his face, I realised it wasn’t an act, at least I hoped he didn’t trick me. 

“I’m so in love with her...it hurts. I know you feel the same, that’s why I wanted you. You understand me better than everybody else, even better than my dork friends. I know I ask you too much because you told me you couldn’t stand me and stuff...but I can’t imagine that with another girl. I can help make you forget about him for a while, too.”

He caught me off the guard, I didn’t expect an outburst from him.I didn’t take him as a guy who got often overly emotional. He wasn’t like that at all.

“I need you Y/N. I need you.” He chanted and I couldn’t help but hug him. He was annoying but even more when he was crying. Taehyung clung to me just like a baby koala to its mother. I had never seen him in tears before when we were kids I was the cry baby. His teardrops made my white T-shirt wet, the always happy guy transformed into a defenceless little boy within a blink of an eye.

“Taehyungie.” I tried to rub his back, comforting him. I wasn’t the best person for that but I couldn’t see him sorrowful. No one deserved unhappiness, not even him. “You really think I’m the only one who can help you?”

“Y-yes.” He let me go to look in my eyes. He searched for the signs, he wanted play safely, he was afraid of me. I could tell.

“I can’t promise anything to you... but since it’s that important to you...I will think about it.” I said and I could feel his lips on mine, I didn’t pull away. He was right - I did like the kiss which scared me a bit. After he pulled away, he once again searched for the warnings but he found none. 

“Thank you, Y/N.” He gave a soft kiss on my cheek which made my face bloody red. 

Before I could say anything I heard Yerin yelling. “TAEHYUNGIE WE GOTTA GO.”

Taehyung growled. “My mom always interrupts the important moments in my life.” His statement got me thinking. Was it that important him for real?

“Let’s get going.” I grabbed his hand without thinking and something flashed in his eyes, I realised what I was doing and let it go.

As they bid farewell, I knew what was coming. Mom turned to me and I felt the interrogation would start soon. “So you and Taehyung... are you okay now?”

“Yes, we are.” I answered shortly, trying to avoid the topic but my mom was like Agatha Christie. I knew she wouldn’t let me get away with that.

“I’m still thinking you two would be perfect together.”

I nodded and locked myself up in my room as fast as I could.

Next day I was preparing for school when my mom rushed into my room, without knocking, of course, I freaked out, I always did when I heard a sudden noise or I noticed a sudden movement.

“Taehyungie is waiting for you. Why didn’t you say you are really close?” 

My eyes widened. “What, he’s here? But he lives far away from here!”

“Oh my God, what a real gentleman.” I couldn’t believe how much my mom liked him. Taehyung, Taehyung, Taehyung.

I quickly got dressed, not wanting him to wait that much for me without invitation. My mom didn’t let him in as she wanted me to call him in.

“Good morning.” I said politely but then my tone changed into a scolding one. “Why are you here?”

“I wanted to walk you to school. Is it a problem?”

“You crazy boy, you live far away from here and school is in the opposite direction!” I rolled my eyes but actually, I couldn’t be mad at him after last night. I felt sorry for him.

He shrugged his shoulders but didn't say anything.

“Come in.” I said and stepped away to let him enter our home. 

“Taehyungie.” My mom greeted him with a warm smile, and her eyes continuously eyed the two of us. “Are you hungry?”

“Thank you Yoona, I had breakfast. I was just waiting for Y/N.”

“Then I’m going upstairs and get my bag. Wait for me.” I ran quickly, I almost fell in hurry.

When I got back I thought my mom would die in fangirling and she gave me a look. I realised Taehyung said something to her...no...no way.

“Have a beautiful day, kids.” She almost pushed us out of the house. Taehyung laughed softly with his deep voice and I gifted him with a frown.

“WHAT DID YOU TELL HER?”

Taehyung became nervous and scratched the back of his neck. “I said I wanted to ask you out and she got carried away.”

“I hope you know we are FAKE DATING.” I growled at him.

“I know but...wait. Did you accept my offer?”

“I did when I saw how much of a cry baby you are.” I mocked him, I was afraid he would feel offended but he just laughed.

“Thank you, Y/N. You are amazing. I hope you will get over with your crush, too.”

I realised one thing. Frankly, Taehyung wasn’t annoying like I had always wanted to believe.

[nathanscovell]

A group of rebellious teenagers sneak onto a Funhouse at the local fair. They then witness a murder by a monstrous creature. The funhouse owner named Conrad unleashes this monster (his son) on the teens. Now their on the run and must escape the not-so-funhouse!

I had to do a Tobe Hooper movie in respect to the legend passing away in August. Hooper was an icon in horror films, bringing us The Texas Chainsaw Massacre, The Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2, Poltergeist and the Invaders From Mars remake (which I love). I consider Tobe Hooper responsible for starting the “bronze age” of horror with Chainsaw Massacre. It led the way for my favorite era of horror films and it scared the crap out of everyone. Without Hooper, movies like Halloween, Nightmare on Elm Street, Child’s Play and even Alien; may have not had a ground to stand on.

Gunther

The Funhouse is a cliche 80s slasher film that pits the youthful spirit against some form of evil. Just like Chainsaw Massacre, Halloween and Friday the 13th. So yea, it was kind of filling a trend that was happening at that time. Although it is classified as “slasher” I think this movie adds a good and memorable monster in the mix. A monster named Gunther Twibunt. Twibunt, that name bleeds death metal band all over it.

After Gunther murders a prostitute. Conrad realizes the teens are in the funhouse. Not wanting the teens to escape, Conrad sends Gunther after them. Now, up until this point Gunther is wearing a Frankenstein mask so you don’t see under the mask for a while. You finally do see his face and it’s so over the top and awesome. He’s this humanoid monster that has a messed up terrible cleft palate vampire kind of face. His face is one even a mother would be scared of. I remember seeing this movie when I was a young kid and Gunther scared the crap out of me. Literally, I pooped myself. It was a mess and I had nightmares with Gunther in them all the time! Where does this Gunther come from and how come he’s working at a carnival? How does a parent have a child and feel fine with their kids face looking this way? There’s got to be a logical explanation to this guy. Wait, yes… I think, I think I know. Yes, my gosh. I am a genius!

The Goonsters Funhouse Theory

Maybe Sloth from The Goonies and Gunther from The Funhouse are brothers! Maybe Agatha Mama Fratelli and Conrad Straker were past lovers. Maybe Mama from another past marriage, had her two sons Francis & Jake. But Jake couldn’t accept his mothers new lover Conrad and he left town. In this time Jake would live a life of crime. Eventually end up in the Astoria county prison on three counts of counterfeit!  Mama and Conrad need to fill the void. So they mated for two long weeks hoping for a child. Soon Mama Fratelli gives birth to twins. But good things die young don’t they? The love that was once Mamas and Conrads isn’t the same. One desires the thrills of carnival life while the other dreams of owning a hotel in the upper western state of Oregon. So Mama takes baby Sloth and Conrad takes baby Gunther. He see’s great potential in Gunther taking a lead role in the Freakshow act as Vampire Boy! The babies grow up apart, one is evil and the other is loving and soft and loves Rocky Road ice cream. However both live without the love of their parent due to their hideous nature. Also they live never actually knowing that the other exists or who their other parent is.

It’s a more beautiful “Parent Trap” film without the weird yellow Lindsay Lohan teeth and depressing visions of a terrible drug induced future for a kid actor. BUT MAN, This should have been a movie! This would have been the ultimate connection between the two films. The Funhouse and The Goonies. Maybe do a Sloth Vs Gunther kind of thing where the two meet face to face. After Gunther kills Chunk in a Truffle Shuffle battle. Sloth is enraged and they both fight. Sloth fights for the love and affection of the Goonsters! Dang, this is cinematic gold! Twenty bucks this would have been better than Predator Vs Alien or Freddy Vs Jason.

Anyways, enough of my awesome insight into things. The Funhouse is a good film, it’s not ground breaking like Hoopers past Chainsaw Massacre films. But it is a gory good time and it is pretty creepy. I love the atmosphere of the carnival. The freak animals, creepy magic show and fraudulent palm reader. Hooper makes the settings seem deep and real. The funhouse sets an eerie tone to the film and much like Chainsaw Massacre, there’s a gritty quality to everything one should appreciate.

The best scene is when the girl Amy can see her parents outside the funhouse through a circular fan. She’s screaming her head off but the fan is muffling her voice. Her parents drive away and she fails to get help.

The Funhouse is a scary film that will live as a great reminder of who Tobe Hooper was as a horror icon. I think touching on our fears and speculations of carny people (I can say carny people because my uncle was once one) is why it works so well. Let’s be honest, I think some or most of us go to a carnival and often wonder if these people have a monster in the back shadows of a ride. We’re probably right and this movie will make you think twice about going into a funhouse ever again. I bet carnies hate this movie, kind of like how clowns hate IT.

Keep The Funhouse in your catalog of awesome 80’s horror films.

HMM Day 7 - we're paying homage to the late Tobe Hooper and his 1981 horror story The Funhouse A group of rebellious teenagers sneak onto a Funhouse at the local fair. They then witness a murder by a monstrous creature.