#teaching her to keep herself alive at any cost

[yuanzhous]

gu xiang saving that singing girl and kicking ass, then being surprised that she doesn't get in trouble just because "she was in the right" will forever be one of my favorite scenes in the show tbh

[bbyfacedx]

thinking about the first crota fireteam and how crucial eris was to recruitment. the mission in itself was to avenge guardians lost to crota but there was a specific tint of focus toward avenging wei ning, something eris didn’t have much of a personal stake in aside from being a friend of her’s and eriana’s. and yet, she went on to recruit people who were obviously incredibly important to her; sai who seems to trust her with complete faith, vell who saved her life once and is willing to do it again, omar who only agreed to go because eris supports the cause, toland who she’d probably looked up to even in his exile, who has genuine faith in the mission despite everything.

and then, they die one by one and eris is entirely helpless to stop it. maybe it would be less bittersweet if they’d accomplished anything close to their original goal, if eris could come out of the hellmouth knowing her team’s deaths weren’t in vain. but they don’t, and they are, and everything was all in vain from the very beginning.

it’s interesting how eris emulates them, keeps them alive through herself. like sai, she trusts herself to carry out this insane hive ascension ritual with little concern for the personal risk. like vell, she adventures out into a hostile frozen wasteland and fights to protect others no matter the cost, even those she barely knows. like omar, she keeps talismans and charms and gives them to others who need reassurance, a reminder she’s in their corner. like toland, she’s the hive expert who still seeks to teach and mentor despite her more self-imposed solitude.

and of course, like eriana, her passionate love and craving for vengeance are constantly at war with one another. her sorrow, he guilt, her anguish over what she’s lost, competing with her desire to help, to mend, to protect what little she has left, to save a world she still somehow has faith in. the difference between them is that eris’ love will always win. she will not be led blindly into any pit again, not by her thirst for revenge, not by her despair, not by the darkness, not by the deep.

[darkpoisonouslove]

HotD S02E05

I had things to say about this episode before I'd even watched it, which I'm sure tells you that everything is magnificent and I have thoroughly enjoyed myself. I see we've now established a pattern of one episode being more setup and then the following having all the good stuff. I'm just kind of running out of patience and tolerance for the bullshit writing decisions that I'm forced to witness all over the place.

I see that the writers are really going to ignore Meleys killing all of those people during Aegon's coronation just to make a fool of Criston and make a victory that's already cost a lot cost even more. Personally, if I'd heard about all the people that were crushed by a dragon during the king's coronation and then I saw the same dragon killed, I'd be relieved at least, if not cheering. We heard so much about how killing the ratcatchers was bad because it alienated the Small Folk, but apparently avenging all the deaths of said Small Folk at your coronation is also somehow bad for PR? How am I supposed to take this as anything but anti green propaganda at worst and a sloppy plot device at best?

I swear to fucking god, if I have to hear one more time about how peaceful things were under Viserys' rule, I'm flipping a table. As if Viserys isn't solely responsible for this whole mess by not managing things better at least if he couldn't be bothered to keep it in his pants and not have any more children. I for sure enjoyed Rhaenyra admitting that he didn't teach her shit but it's so very funny how she says that now while in 1x10 she was explaining to Luke how her father passed all this knowledge down to her and she'd do the same for him. The writers are clowns.

I love how they were so set on making Aegon look like a fool, especially in last episode, but Rhaenyra is in the exact same position! How is her Council talking over her not the same as Aegon's council pretending he's not even there? And yet the show's framing is so insistent on how that's a great hurdle for her to overcome while in Aegon's case it's proof that he's not worthy to be king. To be pretty fucking honest Aegon is at a disadvantage because he's younger. Rhaenyra had time to prepare herself but she was the one who chose to hole herself up in Dragonstone and have sex with Daemon instead of being in King's Landing and ruling in her father's stead and building her positions.

Not Jace complaining about being kept safe at home to the same girl that his mother is treating as disposable just to not risk his ass. And they had to have Baela comforting him.

I've seen people complaining that Daemon is not supposed to remember his mother and they just included this willful incest to make him look worse. Enjoy! Clearly he's manifesting his complexes about being the most suited heir to the throne by having mommy tell him so and take him as a lover because he's just so great.

He's really funny, though. He's threatening left and right and then he can't even follow through because he knows he stands no chance without the people he was just threatening to burn alive. At least when Criston was threatening executions, he committed to them. Literally how are the Blacks in such deep shit when they have more dragons and more houses pledged to them? Looks like a skill issue.

They fumbled my Criston x Alicent x Larys love triangle so bad. I wasn't expecting them to actually do the funny thing, though they still can! With the way things went between Alicent and Criston, now is the perfect time for Larys to pull some Parent Trap shit to make sure Alicent is indulging. I think Alicent might be more receptive to hearing him out than Criston. His argument was the only one that wasn't based on her own mistakes in recent weeks. But he is now essentially saying "you have to make the sacrifice for our cause" when just last episode he wanted her to stop her self-sacrificial agenda and start giving into her impulses. The way that things have shifted since then is insane.

I see people also going "gotcha" at Alicent for the fact that the Small Council didn't back her claim and I must say... As a staunch Alicent supporter, who has constant brainrot about her, I have to agree with their decision. Alicent has done nothing but hinder them at every turn with her refusal to go against Rhaenyra. Thank god they don't know about her Sept escapades with Rhaenyra or they might have wanted her punished for treason. But yes, if I saw this woman completely ignore the fact that her six-year-old grandson was decapitated, I wouldn't trust her to lead me either. The way the writers have chosen to make her act is just completely nonsensical.

Listen, I know it's the same country and everything so the battle strategies would be mostly the same but I can't get over how copy-pasted HotD and GoT feel. The fact that both sides have dragons here should change things drastically and yet...

Daemon having the nerve to comment how awful of a person Aemond is. I'm sorry, did you project too hard? Tbh I hate how they've changed Aemond's character completely from the book and from the first season where he could have easily gotten the throne for himself but he didn't. And all of that just to have their parallels between Daemon and Aemond and still manipulate the viewers into siding with Daemon. I mean sure, he's refusing to recognize Rhaenyra as his ruler but he's still talking about them ruling together. Meanwhile Aemond went and straight up Dracarys-ed his brother. I have no words left anymore. Just fucking change everything so that Rhaenyra wins and put me out of my misery already. It's clear that that's what they want to the point where I'm not sure how they'll keep true to the story.

Corlys finally deciding to make Baela heir to Driftmark is the epitome of too little, too late. The fact that they made her decline too and with that stupid explanation. As if Joffrey or whoever's now named heir to Driftmark isn't "fire and blood" either. Istg this show fucking hates everyone that isn't Rhaenyra or her children.

Daemon, you had one job! Unfortunately, I'm going to have to say the same for Aemond because I hear he burns the Riverlands in the book. Like, bud, how'd you fumble that so bad? They are yours for the taking (assuming this isn't something the writers just invented).

Love how they gave Rhaenyra one (1) idea in sending Ser Alfred to deal with Daemon and then instantly upstaged it with Jace's idea for the Dragonseeds. Almost as if they are so afraid to let Rhaenyra do anything that they have the men around her do her ruling for her. I mean, this could blow up in their faces.

I have to say that I'm not even excited about next episode. What do I have to look forward to? The writers continuing to butcher all the other characters for the sake of their team Black agenda?

[cotton-candy-vodka]

Hi! Who is ur fav ASOUE character?? :)

Hello anon! Thanks for the ask!

ASOUE is one of the few pieces of media I enjoy where I really dont have a favorite character. Typically what makes me choose a character as a favorite is if i see myself in them, and in ASOUE that just happens so freaking much. But i want to answer your question at least a little bit, so here’s some ASOUE characters and how they relate to me/why they’re my “favorite”

Violet - she made a promise to her parents to protect her siblings. And honestly, she loves them so much that I think she’d protect them as fiercely as she does even without the promise. But the paradox with her character lies in the fact that she will do anything to keep her siblings safe: like risking their lives. She suggests stealing a boat and riding it across a large lake in the middle of the hurricane. She convinces her siblings to go down a 46-story elevator shaft at the chance of seeing their new friends. Even though her inventions are typically flawless, a lot of them could fail horribly and end up costing the Baudelaires not only their plan, but their lives. Her love is reckless and impulsive. Violet would destroy herself for her family, but when will she drag them down with her?

Klaus - No matter how much time, research, and dedication this poor boy pours into exposing evil, his work is never enough. Klaus pulls an all-nighter studying a subject he doesnt find interesting in the first book alone - i dare any one of us on this wretched website to do something like that. He shows Mr. Poe proof time and time again that Olaf is lurking and attempting to steal the Baudelaire fortune, but no matter how many facts he conjures up, Mr. Poe is ignorant. He spends the whole series fighting for what he believes is just, only to be told that there are no noble people in this world. The philosophies he built his life on are challenged by the world’s obliviousness, and perhaps unwillingness, to decipher what happens in the shadows. But in a world filled with more grey than black and white, will he become the very thing he’s sworn to destroy by blindly believing in good and evil?

Sunny - Say you lived in the shadow of, oh, I dont know, a pandemic. Gen Alpha will live their lives hearing stories told by those before them about how many deaths there were and how the world stopped. But Gen Alpha themselves will only have a lack of social skills and an accute knowledge of technology, not even realizing that what forged their generation is because of covid. The tragedy lies in the fact that they wont understand what made them what they are and why everyone else is so upset about it. Now, how many people do you know that remember what happened when they were around a year old? Exactly. If Sunny is still alive, she’ll always live in the shadow of unfortunate events that defined her life without her knowing it, all while her siblings suffer from immense trauma and all she can do is watch.

Olaf - Is any of his behavior okay? Absolutely not. But what is so upsetting about his narrative is that I believe he sees himself in the Baudelaires. He sees a childlike naïveté in believing noble people exist, that despite trial after trial one can continue to do what is “right”. But Olaf knows. He knows that there is betrayal, greed, and evil prevalent in everyone. And in his masochistic nature, he finds the Baudelaires learning such life lessons the hard way gratifying. He is satisfied to see others suffer as he did, seeing his vision of the world play out. Heck, he thinks he’s doing these kids a favor, teaching them whole they are still young and able to run from VFD. Terrifying? Yes. Understandable? Also yes.

Quigley - This poor boy. Being only thirteen, stripped of his family and almost everything else he cares about, has to survive by himself. No resources, no help. Just a light at the end of the tunnel: VFD. If he can uncover this mystery, he assumes all will be well, that the hole in his heart will heal. But the more he learns, the more he is brainwashed by the cult that is VFD. His savior slowly killing him from the inside. How poetic is that? (This is definitely going into headcanon territory but definitely dont imagine how if he reunites with his siblings normally he’ll only be a shell of himself and how they’ll try to convince him how VFD destroys everything its sworn to protect and how Quigley doesn’t believe them because if they’re true then what’s left of him??? Definitely do NOT think about that).

Isadora: I am a simple woman. I see a hopeless lesbian crushing on a girl who’s in love with her brother and i receive the biggest emotional attachment of my LIFE

I hope in some round-a-bout way all that answered your question. Have a wonderful day!

[roselensedeyes]

Of tea and dreams

Hello everyone!

I hope August has been treating you well :) I'm sharing with you another elriel fic, this time we meet a special character...

You can find it on AO3 here.

CW: explicit language, NSFW

Word count: 5k

Enjoy!

Elain Archeron took a sip of her tea, frowning when she found it still too hot to drink. She placed it down on its plate. She again admired how finely it was made, the white porcelain delicately decorated with vines and irises. She wondered how much it must have cost, to afford such a marvelous tea set. 

Her memories of her childhood, when her mother had still been alive and her family bathed in her father’s riches, were blurry. She had flashes of certain events, balls thrown in her or her sisters’ honor. What she could recall distinctly, however, was how she felt in those moments. She could remember feeling happy when she tended to her garden, her beautiful flowers could have passed for a painting her younger sister Feyre painted. She recalled attending balls with her sisters and their mother, watching her older sister Nesta dance with such mastery that made it seem easy. She could remember giggling with her friends when the guy she liked noticed her and told her she was pretty.

And then their wealth was taken away with vanished ships and her father’s broken leg.

Even though she wasn’t living in poverty anymore, Elain couldn’t shake off the memories of those years, the hunger and the cold. After Feyre had welcomed her and Nesta in her and her mate, the High Lord of the Night Court, Rhysand’s manor, she had begun to learn how to grow vegetables and fruit, as well as to bake and even a little cooking. She was terrified of waking up and realizing it had all been a dream, and she was still living in that freezing cottage, with little food and even less money.

Elain was reflecting on that as she was sipping her tea with Bethane, the elder Fae whose garden she tended to. Bethane had fast become her friend in the months since she first started helping her, despite their differences. The first being their age.

Yet that had not mattered, not at all, when they had much more things in common, like their passion for flowers, sweets, and tea. That they were both seers had helped them become even closer.

After being thrown into the Cauldron, it was revealed that Elain was a seer, had the ability to see the present as well as the future. Initially, she’d refused to acknowledge the truth, but soon realized that her power was needed for the ongoing war. So she’d sucked it up, and did as she was asked. After the war was over, though, she’d ignored the brief and confusing visions she’d at times get, and tried to live the normal life she always dreamed of having.

“You’re quiet today, Elain,” Bethane observed, her dark eyebrows slightly raised. Bethane was supposedly an elderly citizen, yet you couldn’t tell from her appearance. Her honeyed-colored skin was smooth, no wrinkles in sight, while her chestnut brown hair barely had any gray in it. 

“I’m only tired. I couldn’t fall asleep last night,” Elain admitted.

“Did someone keep you company?” Bethane subtly asked, her eyes turning inquisitive.

Elain blushed deeply. Even after two years of living among the Fae, she still hadn’t gotten used to some of their customs, or quirks. Like their nonchalance regarding sex. Elain was no virgin, yet still she found she couldn’t discuss sex as freely as the Fae and her sisters did. She knew everyone thought her a prude, but she could still remember the teachings her mother and grandmother had instilled in her, and she couldn’t ignore them. For so long she had believed her discipline would ensure she’d find a good man who would protect her and make sure she’d live a happy life. Now, although she knew it wasn’t the truth, she found herself unable to break free from those teachings.

“Ah, well… No.” She paused, trying to find the right words. “I was thinking about someone, though.”

Bethane threw her a curious look. “Do tell.”

Elain felt her cheeks get even warmer. “Well, I’m afraid it’s not a story you will like. He broke my heart,” she said, quietly.

A protective look shone on Bethane’s face. “What fool would dare do that to you?” She asked, before adding, “Apart from your human man. Are you still thinking about him?” She sounded offended.

Elain gave a small chuckle. “No, I’m not. Someone else, a Fae male, did. Pathetic, isn’t it,” She admitted with a self-deprecating laugh.

Bethane shook her head fiercely. “You’re not, stop that. He’s a fool, he has no idea who he let go.” She reached forward and grabbed her hand. “Don’t wallow in self-pity, dear. You’re beautiful, but more than that you’re smart, and you’re kind. If a male can’t see that, then he doesn’t deserve you.”

Elain’s heart squeezed at her kind words. She’d always been called beautiful, since she was a child. She’d never been told her other qualities were more important than that, though. 

She smiled gratefully at Bethane, inclining her head. 

“Anyway, if you want a good male then you should go out with my son,” Bethane continued. Elain huffed out a laugh. The older female had been trying to set the two up since their first meeting. Too bad Elain had set her eyes on a hazel-eyed male, who, apparently, did not share her feelings. 

It had been five months since that almost kiss with Azriel, the Illyrian Fae who had stolen her heart and crushed it with just a few words. She’d never told Bethane that she had fallen for Rhysand’s Spymaster. He was renowned, not only in the Night Court, but in the rest of Prythian, too. She knew Bethane had heard of him at least, so she’d never revealed her infatuation. Hadn’t told her about that fateful Winter Solstice night, either.

“He’s quiet, like you, a bit aloof perhaps, but he will tr–” She was cut off by a loud whoosh, as heavy feet landed near the table.

Elain yelped, yet Bethane didn’t do anything but roll her eyes in an affectionate way. She raised from her chair and approached whoever had crushed their afternoon tea.

“You could have told me you were coming! You interrupted my tea and scared my guest,” Bethane scolded, even as she wrapped her arms around the much bigger figure. 

The figure let out a masculine chuckle, and something about it sounded familiar to Elain. She inclined her head, confused, just as Bethane turned around, allowing Elain to get a clear view of the male.

“Elain, let me introduce you to my son, Azriel,” she said excitedly.

Elain sat frozen, her eyes wide as they took in Azriel. As her brain tried to make sense of the words. My son, Azriel. The woman she’d come to think of as her confidante, her friend, was Azriel’s mother. They murmured hellos, still too shocked to say anything more.

“We were just talking about you, Az,” Bethane went on, not noticing the tension between her son and Elain.

Elain mustered a shaky smile when the older woman turned toward her. Azriel, on his part, stood ramrod still, his eyes fixed on Elain. She wasn’t sure if he was even breathing. 

His mother– his mother— tugged on his hand. “Come sit down with us.”

Elain slid her chair backward. “Oh, no, I can just leave. I don’t want to intrude on your time.” She made to leave, but Bethane waved a hand and signaled she should sit down. 

“Nonsense. You were already here, you’re not the intruder.” 

She glanced at Azriel, even as she sat back down and smiled at his mother.

Bethane waved a hand in the air, a calling, and sure enough a servant appeared. She asked him to pour a cup of tea for Azriel, ignoring his weak protests. 

The older woman watched him until he took the smallest sip of his tea, to which she nodded, satisfied. 

“I’m so happy you two finally met. You’re my two favorite people in all of Prythian,” Bethane exclaimed, elation clear in her voice.

Elain glanced at Azriel again, and found him already looking at her. He quickly looked away, setting his eyes on his mother. “I’m happy to see you again. I’m sorry I haven’t been around recently, I’ve been busy.” 

“No one is ever too busy for their mother,” Bethane said in lieu of a reply. “But let’s not change the topic. Az, have I ever told you about the nice young woman who gives me a hand with my garden?”

Azriel’s scarred hand tightened on the teacup. “I think you mentioned it once or twice,” he said, eyes still fixed on his mother.

“Right, I think I did. Elain is the young woman. She’s incredible at what she does!” Bethane exclaimed.

“I know,” Azriel nodded, then seemed to think about what he said because he added, “From what you’ve told me and what I can see.” He threw her a quick glance, before refocusing on Bethane.

“She was just telling me about how a male rejected her. What a fool,” the older woman said, shaking her head in disbelief.

Azriel choked on his next sip. Then he started coughing. The dark-haired female reached over and gently patted him on the back, a concerned look on her face.

“Are you alright, dear?”

He nodded, his head moving so fast Elain feared he might break his neck. “It just went down the wrong pipe,” he explained, still coughing. He’d brought his hand against his mouth, unconsciously flexing his muscled arm. Elain stared at it appreciatively. 

“Oh, thank god. Anyway, the guy is a real jerk, Elain. You will find better, I’m sure of it,” Bethane turned toward, nodding along with what she was saying. 

Elain felt a blush make its way up her neck. This time she was the one who refused to look at him, though she could feel Azriel burning a hole through her. She needed a change of topic, immediately. 

She glanced at the window. “Oh Mother. I’ve been here for a long time already. I promised my sister I would watch her baby tonight, so she and her husband can go on a much-needed date.”

Not a lie, not entirely. She had promised to babysit Nyx for a few hours, tomorrow night. The identity of her family, of who her sisters actually were, was another thing she’d kept from Bethane. Every time she’d introduce herself as Elain Archeron, people would make the connection to Feyre and Nesta and start treating her differently, almost like she was a famous singer or writer. She’d try to explain she didn’t need any special treatment, that she was just Elain, but they wouldn’t hear a word about it. Someone had even dared to bow to Elain’s greatest horror. So she hadn’t uttered a word about it to Bethane, only introducing herself as Elain the gardener, Elain the seer. She’d felt ashamed about lying to the elder female like that, but it was the price for her friendship. She’d paid it without a second thought.

Bethane’s eyes lit up at the mention of Nyx, even though she obviously didn’t know that was her sister’s baby’s name. No, Bethane thought he was called Matthew. 

“Then you should go. Hopefully one day I will get to meet him,” said the elderly female. A strange light danced in her eyes, something that made Elain’s arms break out in goosebumps. It didn’t sound like a wish, but… more like a promise.

Elain gracefully got up from her chair, and nodded at Bethane. “Thank you again for the tea. I’ll come by in two weeks to assess the lilies, and we’ll decide what to do with it.” The other female replied affirmatively, and Elain headed toward the door. Bethane’s voice stopped her.

“Let Azriel fly you, dear. The sun is about to set, I don’t want you walking alone in the dark.”

Elain scrambled for something to say. “But–But he’s just arrived, don’t you want to spend time with your son?”

Bethane waved a hand in dismissal. “Don’t worry about that. He’ll come by tomorrow, isn’t that right, Az?” Her question was more of a statement, one Azriel couldn’t escape from.

He seemed to realize that, too, as he nodded slowly, glaring at his mother, who glared right back. Elain observed the silent exchange between mother and son, and yearned for that connection. Her mother had never liked her, that she knew, but she still wished for that kind of relationship. She turned her head to the side, to hide from the pain the sight gave her.

Until someone brushed her finger. She looked up, startled, and found Azriel staring at her, gently yet grimly. She wondered if he knew he was the male who had broken her heart and then stomped on it, or if he’d even forgotten the whole exchange. 

He’d started coming to the family dinners again, always sitting as far away from her as possible. She knew it was intentional at first— she avoided him like the plague, too— yet now she wondered if throughout the months it had become an instinct. Her heart squeezed painfully again. 

“Can I?” He asked softly, gesturing toward the sky. 

Elain nodded, not trusting her voice. He attempted a smile, and took her in his arms. Within seconds, they were up in the air.

The view was spectacular, the hues of the sky so beautiful they seemed like they were painted. She could hear children laugh in the distance, the music sounding from pubs that opened early. Yet as Elain’s arms circled Azriel’s neck, all her mind could focus on was that she was in his arms again, for the first time in what felt like years. She could hear his heart beating, fast, which she attributed to the flight. She didn’t have wings, couldn’t shapeshift like her younger sister Feyre, but she reckoned it must take some strength and concentration. She wondered if he could hear her own heart beating fast, wondered if he knew why it was beating as though it was poised to explode.

They landed at the town house, where Elain currently lived. She spent most of her time at the river house with Feyre and Rhysand, to help them with baby Nyx when they were too exhausted, or help with the food, but Rhysand had generously given her the town house when she’d told them she was looking for her own place. She had moved in six weeks after Nyx was born, and it was slowly becoming her home. 

Azriel placed her delicately on the foyer, and took a step back. He cleared his throat, making Elain look up at him. “Thank you.”

Elain’s face must have shown her confusion because he hurried to clarify, “For my mother. For helping her.”

“Oh, there’s no need to thank me,” Elain waved a hand in the air. “You know I like gardening.”

“I’m not– you’ve been doing a lot more than that. In the past few months, I’ve seen my mother happier than ever. Now I know it’s thanks to you.” A strange light shone in his beautiful hazel eyes. 

“I’m— I didn’t do anything special. It’s— just tea,” she said, softly. 

Azriel shook his head. “No, it’s not. Thank you,” he repeated.

Elain smiled slightly. Silence fell between them, and just when Elain thought he was leaving, he spoke again. “I’m sorry.” It was nothing more than a whisper. She wouldn’t have heard him if it wasn’t for her Fae hearing.

“What for?”

He took a step closer, so close she could feel his body heat. Her breath caught in her throat. “I’m sorry,” he said again. “For what happened on Solstice.” 

A buzzing sound ringed in her ears. She froze, and he took the opportunity to slide even closer. His scarred hand landed on her waist. Azriel’s eyes locked on her own. 

“I never should have lied to you.” Elain could feel her heart breaking again at his words. Why was he doing this to her?

“It’s fine,” she said, attempting to break free of his hold. His hand tightened on her waist, not enough to hurt her, but tight enough that she wouldn’t be able to leave. 

“It’s not fine. I made you believe I had no feelings for you, told you kissing you was a mistake. But it’s not. It could never be,” Azriel said, pronouncing the words clearly, not allowing her to misunderstand what he was saying.

Elain was sure her heart had stopped beating. She couldn’t breathe properly, her hands shaking so bad she had to clench them in a fist.

“I should have never said those things to you, I should have never listened to— Elain, please,” he begged, as his hand went up to her cheek, never lifting his touch. “Believe me when I say how ashamed I am. How sorry I am. It was all lies.”

Elain shook her head, and made to take a step back. This time, he let her go. “I– I’m– I don’t know what to say,” she murmured. She looked him in the eyes again, and although she could read honesty in them, she was still unsure.

Taking a deep breath, Elain said, “I don’t know what to believe. Five months ago you broke my heart, and now you’re saying it was a lie? Why? Why would you do that to me? Why would you tell me now?” 

Elain Archeron was known for being quiet, kind, mellow, a people pleaser. Yet in that moment, all she could feel was hot fury sizzling in her veins. How dare he? Azriel’s eyes widened.

“Was it a joke to you? Was I a joke to you? What even is the truth?” She was almost yelling, yet unshed tears blurred her sight. She refused to let them out, refused to let him see how badly he still hurt her.

Yet Azriel didn’t back down like she thought he would, didn’t retreat. No, he moved toward her again, slowly backing her against the wall. Until she could do nothing but look him in the eye, the ire in hers complementing the determination in his. 

“The truth is I’m irrevocably in love with you. For almost my entire life I thought I knew what that word meant, but it turns out I had no idea. At night I find myself having to restrain myself from coming here, from kissing you like I should have five months ago. At the family dinners, I have to sit as far from you as possible because I don’t trust that I won’t take you in my arms and fly us to a faraway place, where no one can find us. 

“The truth is, I find myself yearning to spend my days with you. I want to listen to you talk about your garden, your visions, I want to know all about you. I want to help Nuala and Cerridwen train you. But most importantly, I want to give all of myself, all that I am to you. 

“When my mother said I broke your heart… I know I did, and at the time I thought staying away from you was the better choice for you, but hearing it— it almost felt like someone stabbed me.” Azriel’s voice broke, and his eyes were veiled with tears. “Elain, please believe me when I say you showed me what being in love truly feels like. Even if you can’t find it in yourself to forgive me, I want to thank you for this gift.”

Elain was crying, freely, unashamedly. Growing up, she’d been courted by many men, many times. They would read poetry to her, bring her flowers, some would even sing. No one had poured their heart out like Azriel just had. 

Azriel raised his hand and carefully wiped the tears from her eyes, her cheeks. She closed her eyelids. The feeling of his touch sent shivers down her spine, a gasp escaping her mouth. Azriel’s glance immediately fell to her lips, his eyes darkening. She shivered again.

Elain leaned forward. “I don’t want to talk now. But you owe me a kiss.” And with that, she sealed her lips over his.

Azriel let out a deep moan. It was the push she needed to open her mouth, her tongue meeting his. He groaned, one of his hands slid to the back of her head, the other fell to the small of her back. She pressed her front against his, and the friction between his broad, muscled chest and her breasts made her moan. He took that as an invitation, his hand sliding down to her leg. He lifted her up, carried her to the bedroom, laid her down on the bed.

Elain looked up at Azriel, the heat in his eyes matching her own. She took him in, her gaze following his big arms, his toned legs, the thick hardness that was visible through his shorts. She instinctively squeezed her legs shut. His eyes flashed at the sight.

Yet he didn’t come on the bed. “Are you sure?” He asked her, his voice rough, deep. 

“Yes, please,” she begged him. “We will talk. Later,” she promised. Azriel seemed to study her, but eventually nodded and followed her on the bed. She smiled against her lips, which quickly turned into another moan.

He brought his mouth down to her breasts, while his hand found her wetness. He groaned, the vibrations sending her another wave of pleasure. She gripped his hair until he raised his head. His dilated pupils made it impossible to see the color of his eyes. He was flushed, pleasure and desire clear on his face. She kissed him again as he pushed a finger inside her. They both moaned at the feeling, and he broke the kiss. Azriel left peppermint kisses on her neck, her chest, her stomach, until he reached that sweet spot between her thighs. 

Elain leaned back into the sheets as he kissed her, again and again, until she was writhing in pleasure. Until she screamed his name and collapsed in the bed. He was immediately there, kissing her softly on the mouth. She barely managed to kiss him back, her legs shaking. “I need you inside me,” she whispered against his lips. He sucked in a breath. She smiled.

She got up to her knees and gently pulled him down. Azriel’s eyes flared, understanding what she meant to do. She climbed over him, her hand reaching behind her to grab his hardness. Elain placed it near her entrance and, staring him straight in the eyes, slid down on it. 

It was pure ecstasy. She closed her eyes and tipped her head back as she started moving slowly, Azriel’s hands on her waist guiding her. The room was filled by their moans and short breaths, the sound of their bodies joined together, Elain’s whispered pleas for more, more, more.

She collapsed on top of him just as he came, inside her, filling her. 

Azriel took her in his arms and laid them down on the bed. He stroked her hair as he kissed every inch of her face, murmuring sweet nothings. She smiled in pure bliss, nuzzling his hands, the feeling of being in his strong arms lulling her to sleep.

Elain awoke a couple of minutes later to a warm, wet cloth cleaning her. She caught Azriel’s eyes and they both smiled at the other.

“Go back to sleep, love. I’ll be back soon,” he said quietly. Elain did as he said. 

-

Hours later, as they cuddled in bed, Azriel began speaking.

He told her of his childhood, of the torture he was subjected to at the hands of his half-brothers. 

They both cried at that, Azriel pressing his face against her breasts as Elain cradled him like she did with Nyx. Then it was her turn, she told him of growing up believing she was nothing more than a pretty face to be sold to the highest bidder. She told him how Graysen was the first choice she’d made for herself, and how she’d believed for months after he humiliated her, that maybe her mother and Nesta were right, that she couldn’t make her own choices. Nuala and Cerridwen had made her see the truth.

They talked some more, until finally he told her about his mother.

“Mine wasn’t a lucky guess,” Azriel admitted. “The more you talked about your visions, the more I realized what you were. I recognized the look on your face you’d get when a vision came to you– it was the same one I’d see on my mother’s face. I went to talk to her, told her about you, and she confirmed my guess.”

Elain listened as he recounted his boyhood with Bethane– when he was allowed to see her– and how they’d caught up on the lost moments after he’d escaped his father’s house.

Azriel confessed what had stopped him from kissing her on Solstice. She’d felt anger toward Rhysand, but she couldn’t fault him, not entirely. For Azriel and their future children, should they have them, she would do anything. No, she couldn’t blame him at all.

They talked until the night sky turned into early dawn, when they fell asleep, hugging each other as though they might disappear, as though this was all a dream. 

-

Two weeks later, Elain was again at Bethane’s manor. Rosehall, she found out it was called. 

She’d spent two hours in the garden trying to find out why the lilies were dying, and then trying to fix it when she detected the issue. Bethane, Azriel’s mother, had not been home when she’d arrived, but left instructions to proceed with the work.

She’d come home an hour later, leaving Elain to her work. Elain was anxious to talk to her friend, but she was not about to do a sloppy job. 

Now they were seated in the tearoom that oversaw the blooming garden, in the same positions as last time. This time, Bethane wore a different look on her face. Her features were sharper, controlled.

Elain opened her mouth, wanting to ask her how her weeks had gone, if she’d gotten more visitors, yet what came out was, “You knew.” It wasn’t an accusation, it was a fact. A truth she only realized now, sitting in front of the older female.

Bethane took a sip of her tea, even though Elain knew it was too hot. Azriel’s mother leaned back in her chair. “You have to be more specific, dear. What do you think I knew?”

Elain narrowed her brown eyes. “You knew who I was. You knew who my sister is, you knew I knew your son, and you knew he was the guy who rejected me. What I don’t know is when you figured it out. Was it when I told you I’m a seer, and you remembered Azriel coming to you about a once-human-now-Fae female, with a power similar to yours?” She challenged.

Bethane’s features remained the same, not at all concerned by the words. “It wasn’t hard to guess. There’s not many once-human-now-Fae females around. Actually, I think there’s only three. And I’d heard from other villagers that one of those three, who happened to be the sister of our High Lady, was a gardener. Imagine my surprise when you appeared on my front porch.”

Elain ignored that other piece of truth. “But why? Why did you not tell me you knew who I was? Was it… Was it a joke?” There was pain in her voice, just as a wounded look glinted in her deer-like eyes.

“No, dear. It wasn’t like that. When you showed up at my door, you had this expectant look on your face… It was clear to me you feared I’d treat you differently, that I wouldn’t allow you to do any work. You needed to escape from reality, and that’s what I chose to be for you.” She leaned forward and grabbed Elain’s hands, drawing invisible circles with her fingers. “I had a vision, months before your first visit. I saw my son, Azriel, smiling in pure contentment. He was standing near a bed, his arm encircling someone’s petite shoulders. You were half-sitting on the bed, a tired yet elated look on your face. You were holding a small, bundled cloth— a baby. Yours and Azriel’s baby. I didn’t know you back then, but from that frame alone I could see, I could feel how happy you made him. I only helped you come closer.” Bethane explained, her eyes shining with unshed tears.

Elain sat frozen, her hand to her mouth. She knew her own eyes mirrored the older female’s, her sight blurry. Her mind kept replaying the words pronounced by Bethane. She didn’t know when the vision would take place, or if it would even prove true– there had been cases, Bethane had explained to her one afternoon, where the visions had proven a missed possibility, a what-if scenario only known to seers— yet something told her it would. In a few years, yes… but it would.

“You can’t blame an old female for wanting to ensure she gets grandchildren, can you?” Elain laughed at Bethane’s attempt to make the room lighter, a few tears escaping. Happy tears. “No, I really can’t.” She shook her head. “Well, then I guess you will be happy to hear that Azriel and I have been spending more time together.”

The older female’s features now split open in a huge smile. “Did he apologize?” Elain blushed. “He did, he sure did.” Flashes of the creative ways he’d come up with to apologize to her danced in her mind, but she quickly waved them away. It was not the time. 

“Thank you, Bethane. For everything you did, for me, your son, us. Being your friend has been an honor, my saving grace in these dark months.” 

Bethane blinked rapidly. “Thank you, for everything,” she said, her voice thick with emotion.

They drank their tea in silence, enjoying the warm weather. At some point, Azriel joined them. He took a quick look at their tear-stricken faces and watery eyes and went still. “Is everything alright?” He asked them, worried.

The two females looked at each other and smiled. “Yes, it couldn’t be better.”

[kiraman]

death/blood/gore tws.

( John wick Mizu au, where she's a young assassin that seeks revenge against the men, one of whom is her biological father, who brutally hunted down & killed her family when she was young. )

She can't remember their faces, but she remembers his voice. 

She remembers him saying it's nothing personal. Just tying up... loose ends.

She remembers the river town, the fireworks off the dock. Someone running his fingers through her hair.

Mother dead in the bathtub, veins split open, a bullet to her head. She remembers watching them kill her through the mirror, choking on her tears trying not to scream under their bed.

She remembers the whistling, the promise not to hurt her if she comes out.

She remembers running and running and flames, smoke filling her lungs.

Someone pulling her from the fire.

She doesn't remember her mother's face now. She remembers the sound of her voice breaking as she screamed. The roar of the sea as Eiji carried her away.

The men stand before her house, this place she's been kept hidden all her life, far away from home where no one was supposed to find them, and watch it burn to ashes. Clad in black, black suits, black jackets, a black tiger tattooed on their wrists.

She spends all of her years in a prison of rage and fury; when she sleeps all she sees is fire. Mother torn away from her, and herself, a small, fragile thing, hiding; ashes in her lungs, blood in her mouth. Eiji's hands, scalded from the fire, reaching out to pull her from the flames. She hears Mother scream her name. She wakes up, gasping for air.

On the run, she takes shelter with Eiji, the assassin her Mother's father hired to keep her safe, who takes her in and teaches her the tricks of his trade as she dreams of revenge.

She never stops hungering for it; detached, cold, she does not make friends, she's not good with words; with people; she's got violence in her heart and murder in her eyes. She trains and trains, night and day, molds herself into a weapon; she does not want to be happy; she does not want to live; does not care if death becomes her shadow. She cares for one thing only: vengeance. She will have it, no matter what it costs the world around her.

you will get yourself killed! Eiji snaps at her one moonless night as he watches her walk away from him, desperation in his voice.

She stops, but does not look back. Her voice does not falter when she says Maybe one day. Not before they're dead.

She walks away and does not see him again, alive.

†

Trust no one. Everyone's either an obstacle that must be obliterated or a means to an end. Expendable. Inessential. Unimportant. It can not be any other way. This is what it takes if you want to succeed. she tells herself, over and over again.

She pretends to be a man to infiltrate an elite violent criminal syndicate that operates internationally for the purpose of obtaining access to the men she seeks, track them down and kill them. Every last one of them; only one of them is her father; but all of them have killed her.

Slick, precise, savage, effective, taciturn; run from her with everything you've got, if you've been marked for her bullet, it won't matter how fast you run or where you go; no one escapes The Ghost; they say; she's built a name for herself now- everyone wants him to work for them; no one knows where to find him; The Ghost; The Smoke; I watched Smoke kill three men in a bar with a pencil. Not even a pen. A fucking pencil, Violet says one late night over his drinks, smoke in his mouth and fire in his eyes. I would love to meet him. bring him to me. he says; he does not know, she's already coming for him.

The Cabinet of Curiosities is empty when she pries the door open and steps inside, steps slow, measured, perfectly controlled; her trademark precise, almost military, bearing, the one that hangs off of her like a burial shroud, cold, detached, powerfully controlled, firmly in place. Geraldine looks up from her desk. She looks like a renaissance painting brought to life; she’s got this long dark curly black hair all the way down to her back and limpid brown eyes that droop and she is wearing all black, leather and silk, a velvet choker around her neck and this slash of velvet red lipstick, blood on snow.

“You don’t look well, Smoke,” she says, and it’s perfect—the slinky dress, the way she’s leaning against the counter like a femme fatale, her knowing smile, slick and lovely as oil on film. It’s perfect, her performances always are: here, enveloped in low red neon lights and smoke (she is always smoking; one day Mizu, voice curt, cold, impassive, tells her It'll kill you; Geraldine inhales, blows out the smoke she's swallowed all over Mizu, then stabs her cig out, laughter sharp, chilling; lovely. Will it, now... You care? she taunts Mizu, reaching out to toy with the buttons of her shirt. Mizu does not answer, shrugs her hand off.) she's putting on quite the show.

Mizu grunts at it anyway, a hollow, bitter sort of sound. That’s the difference between Mizu and her, just then; Mizu can’t seem to stop being real. It is why she is effective, why she's come this far. She does not give a fuck. Geraldine can’t seem to be real at all. (Later they’ll meet somewhere between the two, but now? It’s unfortunate.)

“I need the Butcher.” Mizu says, plainly, and it’s just her, Geraldine-Riley-Jane-Isabelle, whoever she is just then—who sucks in a breath. The mask doesn’t fall (never, never) but it slips a little. Daughter of a high-ranking member of the High Table that provides people like her like him like Smoke, guns, ammo, shelter and anything they might desire; Mizu's heard the stories about her, too; an unstoppable force, The Thief. there is nothing I cannot get my hands on, she tells Mizu one night, enveloped in shadows and smoke in the corner of some slick bar in the underbelly of New York, her hand slipping down the curve of Mizu's chest, between her legs before Mizu's hand shoots out, catching her hand mid-way, a dark smirk on her mouth.

“Oh,” Geraldine says now. ”You've been shot.” Mizu does not answer, but Geraldine notices how tightly his left hand is pressed against his side. Mizu steps closer, grunting. “Who did this?” she asks, and Mizu laughs then, darkly. It’s a nastier sound, now, less bitter and more cruel, low. “Why, think it might have been one of your friends?” Something about Geraldine's face sharpens, hardens. Her eyes go dead, the warmth of them snuffed out like a candle. Mizu will never tell her, but that’s why she liked her—the playfulness balanced with the spite, like a single-sided blade. Serrated. “Don’t,” Geraldine-Riley-Jane-Isabelle says, and her voice is dead too. “No one's our friend.” And then, she too, becomes smoke, slinking away in a swirl of leather and smoke, snuffing out her cig against the counter. Come with me, she beckons Mizu closer, ushers her into the dark belly of the beast.

The Cabinet of Curiosities, is not, after all what it appears to be. Nothing ever is, around here, she's found. Not even herself. Least of all herself.

She’s masked under her own self illusions for her father, and she’s lying—she doesn’t speak for all of them, the terrible class of people who make up the criminal substratum; the one they all work for, here, where no one breathes or dies without him knowing: Violet. Some of them have morals and some of them don’t, and some of them will, if given the proper motivation; Mizu will learn that, soon. But just then she’s entirely scar tissue and aching, a tempest of rage roiling in her blood; she wants her mother back; she wants their blood on her hands. Everything about her is the profound ache of absence, of loss, of a life taken from her, running and running, she does not know when to stop, and she’s unwilling to believe her when she says they are not their friends. “It wasn’t one of them anyways,” Mizu mutters, a kind of slantwise half-apology that comes out gritty and dark. Geraldine-not-Geraldine says nothing, but something about her posture eases. Mizu's not sure how to take that. She watches out of the corner of her eye as Geraldine raises her eyes to her for a moment—almost lazily— but does not stop walking. Geraldine leads her through dark, long hallways, the walls thrumming with the pulse of distant music somewhere under their feet ( the Den; the underground club where anything is possible, accessible only through The Cabinet of Curiosities; she wonders who's down there, right now; looking for her). She makes her sit in the dark in some room she's never been taken before; pours her a drink, and when she says I don't drink, Geraldine knocks it back herself, flinching at its sharpness, pours another one, and pushes the glass towards Mizu where she sits on the edge of some bed. You'll fucking need it. she says, and then she is gone. “Fuck..." Mizu growls, peeling her shirt back to expose the gunshot wound, grunting as a sharp jolt of pain shoots through her ribcage. Geraldine comes back, carrying a white box which she wordlessly sets down near Mizu as she kneels before her. With a shock of realization, she blinks, eyes cold and empty, ice, snaps "What the fuck are you doing?" flinching away when Geraldine reaches for the buttons of her bloodsoaked shirt. She pulls her hand back and stares at Mizu, sighing. She does not say anything for a long moment, too long, but then, those delicate, slim shoulders of hers slump over under whatever tension they are holding, and she relents. "The butcher's with Violet." she admits, curtly, as though afraid of what Mizu might think. Smoke works for Violet, too; Geraldine told her as much once, and Mizu had sneered, had said, I don't work for anyone. She does not know what's happened; she does not know why he suddenly disappeared two weeks ago, only to come back now, shot half dead, growling about how Violet's men are somehow her friends, and not Smoke's. They've killed together. No?

What have you done, Smoke? What have you done? Geraldine wonders but does not ask the question, is not sure she wants to know...

"Don't worry—" she begins, but Smoke cuts her off, breathless, voice hard, piercing the air between the two of them, like a knife, stabbing. "Violet's here?" Mizu's voice is a growl, salivating over its prey; god help us, he's got murder in his eyes. What have you done? she wonders again, and fear, deep and unfathomable, burrows into Geraldine's stomach as she gathers her needle and thread, sterile gauze and antiseptics from her box, says, resolutely, No, Mizu. He's not. But Mizu's already on her feet and heading for the door, dragging her feet, grunting in pain, blood streaming profusely from her open wound,

stop, god. he's not here. Butcher left two hours ago. Come back to the bed, you'll fucking bleed to death. she snaps, impatient, astonished yet somehow unsurprised by Mizu's stubborn, infuriating disregard of anything but whatever he thinks must be done.

Mizu grunts, but in the end, she comes back to her bed; they are in her room, she realizes; they must be. There's silk all over her bed, black sheets, crimson curtains, blocking out the light. There's smoke in the air, sweet and cloying, thick with Geraldine's perfume, lilacs and something sour, bitter. Mizu watches her clean away the blood, hissing through her teeth at the touch— firm yet gentle— but not flinching, too familiar with the pain, the death, the anguish to mind it.

"Do you even know what you are doing?" she huffs, impatient, watching Geraldine's fingers come away slick with her blood, relief flooding those brown eyes when she realises the bullet's not been lodged somewhere into her side, it's passed through her, cleanly. “You’re drunk,” Mizu says, after swallowing a mouthful of the drink she's brought her, growling in pain as Geraldine begins to disinfect the wound. “Join the club.” she snaps back, says, it's deep, it'll hurt, which Mizu does not answer, only knocks back the bourbon in her glass, bearing the pain wordlessly, unflinchingly.

The needle buries into her side, over and over again, the wound must have been deeper than she thought. She grits her teeth through it, ice-blue eyes fixed on the threads of silver light pouring over the crimson curtains.

Somewhere at her feet, she hears a phone ring, an incoming message. Geraldine pauses for far longer than she has ever seen her pause away from a task at hand before. Then, she calmly returns to her job, patching her up, soft, small hands tender against her torn skin, far gentler than they need to be.

“Smoke…”

“What?” Mizu turns to look at her, and she’s struck—all over again, by how she looks at her, like she’s tearing into her with her eyes and vivisecting whatever organs are left there beneath her skin. Surely, not a heart. Maybe a liver. She probably has a liver, somewhere for all the rage to go, like liquor flooding her bloodstream,: she does not drink; anger is her addiction; her obsession; the poison in her blood.

Geraldine looks up at her with something dark in her eyes, something frighteningly hopeless; desperate.

For a long, long moment Isabelle (who isn’t Isabelle to Mizu, not yet, she's still Geraldine, the pretty girl that greets her into The Cabinet) looks back at her, letting herself be looked at. Letting him look. Then, as though something important has been wordlessly decided, she leans in, her voice pitched low in her ear, and says— “What,” Mizu echoes, surprised at the closeness, cutting her off.

Geraldine does not pull away.

“The map, it’s in the storage container at the Bunker. Number 1-11. The combination for the lock is 03-12-77, my mother’s birthday. Find him on new year's eve. At the Cellar.” Mizu blinks, shock swiftly jolting right through her system, like lightning, striking: powerful; absolute. Inevitable. “Are you…” “Mark it down as a win,” Geraldine says. She drains the last of the bourbon left in Mizu's glass, sets it back on the bed near them. Her hand, Mizu notices, is shaking. “I think you might need one, right now...”

She holds her phone up for Mizu to look at the message sent to her not ten minutes ago.

UNKNOWN NUMBER WORLDWIDE OPEN CONTRACT THE SMOKE $10 MILLION USD

Mizu does not flinch; she does not gasp in shock. It's not fear in her eyes; it is not desperation; it's something darker, violent. It's death. It's murder. A detached sneer, a cold, fleeting touch to her hand. A nod. Smoke rises, filling the air between the two of them, hungered, inescapable, like breath shared between lungs.

Geraldine doesn’t try to keep her, when she goes.

[gemini-sensei]

Alpha!Hawk Moskowitz x Omega!Lawrence!Reader Headcanons

Chubby!Fem!Reader 💖 Some NSFW 💖

CW: a/b/o and knotting, heavy marking mentioned, minor possessive behavior, mentioned public behavior. (unedited)

💖Reader was raised by lone alpha Johnny Lawrence, who was left with the pup after some things didn't quite work out with her mother. For all of his inexperience, his instincts drove him to do everything to keep her alive, but it wasn't a cake walk. He had no support system, no pack. His former pack had all moved on with their lives and doing great for themselves, starting families with their mates or doing their own thing. So it was just Johnny and the pup for a long time.

💖When she presented as an omega, Johnny didn't know what to do. He only knew a little bit about omegas in all honesty, as he was brought up to be a big, bad, tough alpha. Luckily for him, the schools teach the kids about dynamics and the differences between alphas, betas, and omegas, so that was one weight off of his shoulders. However, he struggled with the idea that his omega daughter was going to be out in the world without him at some point, his inner alpha huffing and puffing because he needs to protect her at all costs.

💖Being raised by Johnny made Reader into an unconventional omega. She became aggressive and stubborn, unlike what is typically expected of omegas. She acts like an alpha, which leads to some difficult situations down the line.

💖She doesn't get along with most alphas, if any at all, and hangs out with a lot of betas and other omegas. Betas are level-headed enough that they can keep up with her attitude whilst alphas don't like her loud mouth. Omegas seeks her out because she's tougher than they typically are, some looking for protection or comfort.

💖Part of her upbringing was learning karate because, as Johnny realized not long after she presented, an omega should be able to protect herself. So she will kick ass if she feels like she or any of her omega classmates are being harassed. Johnny has gotten many phone calls about his omega daughter starting fights and all he ever had to say about it was "good for her. Should take her out for ice cream or something."

💖Despite being a good protector, she doesn't accumulate or become apart of a group at her school. Omegas like her, but not enough to really keep her around all the time; they stick to their group of soft spoken and sweet omegas. Betas are cools, but they come and go. She's left one her own and Johnny worries she's going to be alone like him.

💖When he starts his own dojo, he has her join not only because she's a great fighter (thanks to yours truly ofc), but because he hopes it might bring some like minded people around for her to be friends with and hopefully find a pack.

💖It goes much better than he could have expected. Sure, there were some bumps in the road and it eventually leads to him teaming up with his long time high school rival (who he maybe fooled around with at one point) Daniel LaRusso, but it works out. His daughter thrives in karate and she finds a pack that isn't just her and her dad. (Johnny only realizes much later that he has also found a new pack.)

💖Of course, through the journey, she meets Hawk. He isn't sure about her at first, thinking she's wearing some sort of masking perfume to hide her real scent, but soon learns that, no, she really is an omega and she has that much attitude. Had he met her before becoming the Hawk, he would have been scared of her, but he finds her cute to be pretty cute... then he learns never to call her cute.

💖She pins him to the mat and he's immediately turned on. He's also super impressed by her fighting skill and falls hard for her aggressiveness. She's unlike any omega he's ever met and from that day on, he makes it apart of his mission to have her be his omega.

💖Reader isn't an easy omega to court either and he doesn't start the process until they're apart of a huge pack. They've had ups and downs in their friendship, but they never gave up on each other. When they finally got to a good spot, learning Miyagi-Do and finding some inner balance, Hawk starts courting her because he thinks he's finally worthy enough to be her alpha (whereas before he felt like he had to be tougher and bigger to be her alpha, only to realize that was not impressing her).

💖Alpha!Robby hates watching them. Everyday, Hawk comes to training with a new courting gift for his sister. It's purely because of his alpha instincts to protect the omegas of his pack, plus that's his younger sister. Though, they weren't really raised together, Robby and Reader always knew they're siblings and they're hung out sometimes. That was enough to create their strong sibling bond, so he's inclined to be the overprotective brother, but still recognizes that she can take care of herself.

💖Johnny also hates watching them, but purely because he doesn't want to watch her grow up. However, he's happy to see he did something right with her - after all, she's a strong omega and she's finally found her pack and potential mate. That's all he could have ever hoped for.

💖The courting period is short in all honesty. It was a few weeks, two months tops. Hawk's inner alpha already knows that the Reader is the omega for him and Reader has always said that she's never needed an alpha, but when she met Hawk and got to know him, he was the only alpha she's ever wanted.

💖When they give each other their bond marks after a date where Hawk took Reader to a nice little restaurant. It isn't too fancy, but he wanted to treat her to something nice. She wears a pretty dress that makes him go gaga and he can't keep his hands off of her the whole dinner. Then he took her home, which it wasn't the first time they fucked but it was the first time they took things a little slow. It was very romantic, which lead to their bonding.

💖The days following, she doesn't cause any problems or start any unnecessary. Johnny becomes a little concerned because he can tell something's up. He spends hours trying to figure out, watching her smile and cuddle up with Hawk between lessons. It takes Robby pointing it out to him for Johnny to realize they've bonded and he doesn't know how to feel about that.

💖Reader is a possessive omega and Hawk is all for it. When they're out and about and anyone looks at her man the wrong way, she's growling at them. She's rude and clingy, holding Hawk close by the arm while standing in front of him and telling a group of omegas to back off. She then aggressively scents him in a quiet corner or his car and they make out heavily for a good twenty minutes before going on with their day.

💖When things get steamy between Reader and Hawk, it's intense. He's on top, fucking her hard while leaving dark hickeys all over her neck, shoulders, chest, tits, anywhere he can. He makes sure to make her bond mark noticeable every time they go at it so everyone knows that she's his omega.

💖When Reader goes into heat, she is absolutely insatiable. He's on top to start, but once he knots her, she's still trying to fuck herself on his cock. So he repositions them so he's laying on his back and she's sitting on his cock. She rides his knot hard, cunt squeezing tight around him as she goes after another orgasm. He holds her hips and helps move her, but for the most part she's doing a lot of the work. She needs more relief, needs more of him, so she'll work hard for it and he loves watching her. She makes him come so many times and he makes her come by rubbing and pinching her clit, it goes on for hours. His knot won't go down for hours.

💖Eventually she feels satiated and collapses on top of him and he kisses her head. He starts praising her, rubbing her soft pudgy sides and telling her how she's a good omega. She really needs that praise because sometimes her inner omega feels insecure for being so aggressive and harsh. She never changes, but sometimes it's good to know she can be herself and still be a "good omega."

💖Alpha!Hawk is fiercely protective of his omega, but he knows she can take care of herself and that is super hot to him. So if there's ever a situation, he sits back and watches her handle it because wowwie is she hot. Sometimes it turns him on too. However, if things start to get out of hand, he steps in and defends his omega, though it's more like they have each other's back than one protecting the other.

"Touch her and she'll break your arm."

💖A lot of people don't understand how they work. She's a stubborn omega and to most people that would be a major turn off; meanwhile, he's a tough alpha with a secret big soft heart. To most people, it shouldn't work, but they don't know Reader and Hawk, so they just don't get it.

💖Robby and Johnny eventually accept Hawk being Reader's mate. After Robby and Hawk sort out their differences, he sees how much Hawk truly cares for his sister. Johnny is still a work in progress, but he's just happy to see his little girl happy. He's more upset that she's not a pup anymore, but he'll never admit to tearing up about it.

💖Robby and the rest of the pack don't like going a lot of places with Reader and Hawk because they don't know how to keep the PDA to a minimum. It starts off with a lot of hand holding and little pecks on the lips, even a piggyback ride from time to time, but quickly evolves into hot make out sessions in the dark corners of the arcade, Reader sitting on Hawk's lap at the mall food court, and borderline inappropriate behavior just about anywhere they can sneak away to. Reader and Hawk don't care of course, but no one else wants to see it. Miguel is constantly apologizing for them and the heavy scent they give off when they start getting frisky.

[xx-blueboy-xx]

To celebrate trickster Tuesday! I am going to ramble about Mystery Spot, the episode ever. Don't take any of this super seriously I am by no means a "meta analysis" this is just me foaming at the mouth. + the spiral of thoughts it sent me on.

Anyways. If you wanna read it! It's below the cut! Because it got (long).

First off, Mystery Spot represents the literal cycle Sam (and also the entire Winchester family) find themselves caught in, over and over and over again: due to their inherent savior & martyr complexes. Which are not a great blend. Imagine having to save everyone you care about, but, always being willing to simply - die for them. More than willing. Happy to. Feel like you have to, in order to be worth anything to anyone or them. In order to atone.

Now, we saw in S1-S2 how much Dean is willing to give up for family, for Sam. It's the entire reason S3 is happening - he sold his own soul to a demon, something he hated John for, to save Sam. To bring him back to life. Something we learn that his own mother did all those years ago: just not at the price of her soul, but, essentially - her first born child (so Rumplstilskin of Azazel for real). The Winchester need to save each other, that toxic codependency on family, that "family is all you got at the end of the day" mentality is what started it all.

We have only seen in S1-S2 breif glimpses that Sam also shows these signs. The same codependency as Dean, and that savior complex. However - it never becomes truly and completely apparent until S3. Where he is willing to steal human livers, find anyway - anything to save Dean from his deal. It isn't until Jessica, John and everyone else he has known is gone, that Sam begins to fall completely into the codependency that Dean unfortunately, feeds into. (With all of his "You ran away from the family" talk and such)

In Mystery Spot: we see the first true depths of how far Sam is willing to go to keep Dean alive. How far he has fallen from that rebelliousness he had before John died. Starting to agree with Dean that he "tried his best". And things like that. In Mystery Spot we see that Sam rather relive the same day over and over and over again, than let Dean die. We never see him accept it. Not once. Sure, it's a time-loop, but we know Gabriel was trying to teach Sam to let go.

Teach him to break the fucking cycle. But he doesn't. He contuines to give into it, over and over. Until Gabriel reveals himself, thinking maybe he can still change it. Change Sam. Get through to him. That'd when we get those 6 months of pure obessesion.

And at the end of it? We see the Sam that suggested to Dean they use the evil-immortal doctors alchemy to keep him alive, perfectly willing to steal human livers and such for it: come out full force. He is completely willing to sacrifice a stranger to save Dean. Rather than being hellhent on killing the Trickster, on revenge, he wants him back. At any cost. Even an innocent human life.

This is the Sam we see, after years and years of Dean encouraging this behavior - seasons later, bring an entire apyclopse down on the world to get rid of the Mark of Cain. Force a man to sell his soul. Have Rowena kill the inky person she had ever allowed herself to love - someone she considered her son. To utterly get rid of another person's autonomy (keeping her locked up ect.) to get it.

Note: it is NOT Dean's fault, that Sam broke Amara out, I simply am stating that his "we die for family sammy" and "we do everything for family sammy" throughout the years helped Sam make the decision. But at the end of the day, Sam choose to get rid of the Mark. All of the death that happened because of her is pretty directly on his hands, and he knows this.

I also believe that, while Sam feels massive amounts of sympathy, I believe he struggles a (lot) with empathy (autism + protecting himself/trauma response). He can easily replicate empathy, and act as if he cares but we see his hypocritical behavior consistently come into play and make us think: huh. I don't think he actually understands how Dean, Castiel ect. feels. That is why he comes off as spoiled and ungrateful to Dean in early seasons, and in later seasons does things that are completely amoral and deranged. Simply for those he loves.

Because he struggles to wrap his head around *why* Dean can save him, kill people for him, force an angel on him - but when he releases an apyclopse, him saying "I would do it all again." Is somehow wrong. He doesn't see his own hypocrisy at times and struggles especially to see others.

Anyways.

I support Sammy war crimes.

[corcnaiism]

;-- just bc i won't be able to properly write prompto's modern verse completely and in a grammatically correct manner any time soon, ima just post a plethora of bulletins of important info. prompto's modern verse pt.1 :

prompto comes from the outskirts of insomnia where all the shady stuff happens. crime and poverty are the biggest issues of the area.

his parents were drunkards, never married, unfaithful, and only kept prompto for the extra money given to them by the system to "raise him". they used very little of the money for him and the rest for themselves. the dad worked as a construction worker and the mum was a stay-at-home "wife". the two were usually always away from home or passed out drunk, leaving poor baby prompto alone. it was a miracle he survives as he was neglected to all hell and only given the minimal effort to keep him alive.

prompto suffered from poor eyesight at an early age, but his parents never bothered to get him prescription glasses.

once prompto was old enough, the parents immediately sent him off to school as they didn't want to deal with a toddler at home. bc of how disconnected he was from his parents, prompto had learning difficulties as he could not communicate properly with others. luckily, his teachers were very helpful and caught him up, especially his homeroom teacher who remained the same throughout his kindergarden-3rd grade years. the parents never attended to any school related events, even parent-teacher conferences.

eventually, his dad would leave him a weekly allowance for him to use to buy himself food since his mum wouldn't bother cooking for both of them, and they didn't want to deal with a deceased child on their conscious. there were times his allowance would get stolen from him by his mum who desperately needed alcohol, and prompto quickly learned to hide his money and other personal belongings away. at some point, he would give up eating for a day in order for him to buy himself a pair of reading glasses. it still wasn't enough but better than not being able to see much.

due to their intoxication, his parents were abusive towards each other and prompto. they would yell, throw things, punch walls, and physically beat each other. this lead to prompto developing severe ptsd to the sound of screaming, other loud noises, and touch. he would also learn to wear long sleeves and pants to cover up bruises and cuts he'd receive from physical altercations with his parents bc he didn't want to be called "ugly" by others.

prompto favorite place throughout his youth was school, mainly bc it was the only other place he could go that didn't cost money for him to exist for a couple of hours. he may had trouble with his academics, but the drive to learn was there thanks to his homeroom teacher who encouraged him every step of the way. she was also the reason why he got into music early on, simply bc she found him eating lunch in the music room.

prompto grew a fascination with playing the piano when his homeroom teacher began teaching him. unlike his studies, he was a very quick learner when it came to playing instruments and shortly, he'd be performing in the school's talent shows. it didn't take long before he also picked up guitar and singing. due to the control he had with the sounds coming from the instruments and his voice, prompto found a means to cope with his ptsd and turn it into something soothing.

his homeroom teacher gifted prompto his very own keyboard piano for him to practice at home for his birthday, but he was hesitant to accept it due to fear of how his parents would react. his teacher insisted and said she would speak with his parents about it, so they wouldn't think otherwise, but that also was a big no from him. nonetheless, she drove him home that day and introduced herself to his dad who was the one who opened the door. he was already wasted when they got there, pissed off to all hell. his dad exclaimed they didn't need "charity" or "hand-me-downs" and yelled at her to leave. but his homeroom teacher urged to let prompto take this gift and explained how talented he was with the piano and other aspects, but the dad didn't want to hear any of it and flew off the rails by smashing the keyboard right in front of her face. this triggered red flags within the teacher and grew worried over prompto's state of being living in such an abusive household. she wanted to take prompto away but knew it would only cause more trouble, so she decided to leave and would call the authorities later. however, she had only been able to set one foot away when prompto's dad got so bothered by her presence and suspected she would call the cops on him, so he grabbed the nearest gun he had stored up and shot her point blank, killing her instantly. prompto had been there the entire time and witnessed everything, worsening his trauma. it only got worse when his dad dragged both him and his teacher's corpse to his truck and drove them to a secluded area in the middle of nowhere. his dad threw a shovel at prompto and forced him to bury his teacher which he pleaded against it but was beat in response, so he had to with tears rolling down his face. his dad threatened to kill him too if he ever said a word to anyone, so for years poor prompto kept his mouth shut in utter fear for his life. for further erasure of the crime, the dad wrecked the vehicle his teacher had drove in and dumped it in the largest body of water closet to insomnia. the cops never had a lead for years.

prompto's mum would die a year later due to alcohol poisoning. he found her laying on the bathroom floor and tried to save her by calling an ambulance, but he had been too late. his dad never cared.

due to heartbreaking tragedies taking a heavy toll on him, prompto's health declined dangerously. some days he would eat too much, some days he wouldn't eat at all. some days he would sleep all day, and some days he wouldn't be able to sleep a wink. this was where his weight issues began, being overweight. he would miss school occasionally bc it reminded him too much of his teacher, but he wouldn't miss a lot as he didn't want to be around the house when his dad was there, and he'd get a beating if the school called his dad, and he'd find out he had skipped school.

when prompto did go to school, his grades were poor, and he'd spend a lot of time in the music room where his deceased teacher used to spend the afternoons with him. his love for music had withered away since her passing, but it would eventually spark again when he wanted to play her a song on the piano in hopes that she would be able to hear it, as a means to give her a funeral of his own. he felt as though she would want him to continue with what she had praised him so much for, and he wanted to honor her wishes. with everything he played up till present time, she was always on his mind, dedicated and thanked her with each song he played.

entering middle school, prompto dealt with a lot of bullying for his overweight problem from students and his dad alike. seeing as how he was unable to run away or have the agility to dodge punches coming his way, he decided it was best to start dieting and working out in order to be able to defend himself bc he was tired of constantly taking it. it was a tedious and difficult journey as he would relapse several times whenever something triggered him, but he kept at it as he really wanted to do better, and he could feel himself getting better whenever he would follow routine. he decided to record his progress using throw-away cameras he'd buy with his saved up allowance and taking pictures of himself to see the changes he'd make. that was when his fascination with photography kicked in as he found it motivational to see the past and the present and compare them, liking the idea that he can capture a moment of time with a simple click. shortly, and when he would have extra film rolls, he would begin taking pictures of things he found interesting and began his own collection. he still has his old albums up till present time.

[youmarin]

"The Smile Has Left Your Eyes" rant.

*Spoilers below*

Gotta get it off my chest. Mostly bc I hurt for Kim Moo Young .

I read the series summary and I was like, "Mmm okaaay there's gonna be trauma here." To be honest I didn't think grandly of him during the first episodes. Actually I didn't know what to think of Kim Moo Young. A very goodlooking mf who's a loner. He grew in an orphanage after the incident and well he seemed to care for the nuns there but that was it. He didn't let anyone close or felt anything for anyone (the closest thing before things developed was that coworker of his but even they didn't appear too close to be called friends? idk).

Until he overheard that conversation between Seung Ah and Jang Woo Sang, he didn't seem to do stuff that would make him go out of his way. He seemed to be looking to entertain himself even at the cost of other people's well being. That was because he normally was numb minded. He didn't understand people's behaviour, like for example, why people "had" to do things they didn't really want to do. So when he taunted Seung Ah (even though it must've been uncomfortable. I felt like that watching it), I thought, "He's being quite an asshole, but maybe that's his way to try and help her step up for herself?". Think about it, things are never as easy as just saying it. She thought she couldn't get herself out of that situation but Moo Young didn't see things like that. He saw things differently. And so he was like, "If you don't wanna do it then don't." Simple as that.

Seung Ah fell for Moo Young because of that. And I don't think she really loved him either. She was clinging to him to escape her own life, one that was mostly decided for her and that she didn't want. (Plus they've "known" each other for like 2 months. C'mon.)

Still at this point, Moo Youngs motivations regarding Seung Ah were obviously messed up. "I wanted to know what drives a rich girl.", the whole bunch of lies, working up people for the fun of it. I wasn't a fan. He really gave an uneasy feeling (and with that face too. I was like, "Damn he's so fine but something's really wrong with him. Can't say I like him but I don't unlike him" lmao). And all that game got two people killed (which of course he didn't plan on it to end like that, and it was her fiancé, speeding and being drunk off his ass that didn't even bother to press the breaks before they crashed. ). But feeling nothing over it? Something's up up there in his head.

Same with Lim Yu Ri. He keeps her from ending her life and she catches feelings (he collects broken girls and broken girls love him 💀). He learns she's on a tough spot with another girl who's extorting her. And he intervenes again and helps someone who's also clearly not in her right mind to commit murder. Moo Young stands and watches. And then goes and cleans it up. ( 🚩❗)

Seung-Ah's and Jeong Mi Yeon's death were not his doing. Directly. But he did stuff that lead to that end. And still, no remorse, no guilt. Nothing. Again, technically he didn't do it so why would he feel those? But well, any other person would, wouldn’t they?

It's understandable and logical for Jin Gook to be a worried brother and not want Jin Kang near him. Oh but wait! Jin Gook might know the guy! From way back when he was a little boy! He's aware of the great possibility that Moo Young might be actually the son of a criminal he accidentally shot to death more than twenty years ago. And that Jin Kang and Moo Young's pasts are linked. But Jin Gook is scared for Jin Kang and more scared for himself to face the past and burst the bubble he's been trying to keep for so long (though it's still eating him alive).

Unfortunately for him, Jin Kang falls in love with Moo Young and for her, Moo Young decides to try an be a good person and stop acting as he had been until then. With her help.

"Promise me you'll be a good person." "Then teach me."

And he starts getting curious again about the past he'd forgotten about thanks to (funny, huh) the car crash he was in with Seung Ah and Jang Woo Sang. And what does Jin Gook decides to do? Stab. the. guy. A police officer. Oh and after calling Moo Young a murderer, a devil and everything he could come up with. Talking big when he had also killed someone (be it an accident, that the person was a murderer and that he might've ended up sentenced with death anyway, it doesn't take away that he killed someone).

And then everyone at the station being normal about it?? "Oh there was no report." Nobody investigated shit. Tak So Jung saw the footage and still did shit about it. But that also lead to Moo Young seeking the doctor (the doctor who let go an amnesic 7 year old boy from a hospital alone to who knows where with nobody to take care of him. Just relying on chance, "Maybe it'll be better". Like some sort of study subject.).

More questions were brought to Moo Young. The only thing the doctor could tell him was that his father fell to his death. But he knew that wasn't it because every time that the memory came he saw and heard a gun fired. So he goes to where they say his father died, finds his house (that scene when he's inside the house and the memories come back full force that he falls to the ground. Ok, kill me now that was so intense.) And he finds out that his girlfriend's brother is his father's killer. Now, how can he tell her that?

He goes back, he's angry, he has to know the rest. He breaks into Jin Gook and Jin Kang's house. Finds an old missing child poster with his picture in it. Then he reaches out for help with Jang Woo Sang's older sister (from the people he got tangled with in the beginning and that Jin Kang had stopped him from getting involved with again. And Jin Kang had told him that those people were capable of anything. Honestly didn't get that woman's deal. She was really a bitch who loved nobody and loved toying with people. Girl, get a life won't you. Mind your business.) He asks for a gun and breaks in again into their house. When Jin Gook arrives he sees Moo Young's shoes in the entryway. And he admits that he shot his father. Moo Young asks why and tells him he ruined his childhood and family. But was he really going to shoot him? I don't know. I really want to believe he wouldn’t shoot him. Because Jin Gook is important to Jin Kang. And I know he said a couple of times "You're just you to me." Which basically I translate to "The hell with your brother." (plus he stabbed him. I have resentment over that lol. Like, what was the reason?).

But I'm glad we didn't see that happen (for Moo Young. The grudge again 💀). Later he finds out that the story he had made around his drawing, the sole clue he was left with for a long time was actually not true. His dad, who he thought had in a moment searched for him, was not a police officer (that was Jin Gook, in fact), it was a murderer. A murderer who killed his mom and two others (when I heard about the other two people that's when I realized, "Ok those are Jin Kang's parents" and the idea that popped into my head when Tak So Jung told Jin Gook "If that's the boy you were searching they can't be together.", that Jin Kang and Moo Young were siblings, was wrong. But they scared me for a sec. with that. I was like, "Hell nah I love SIG but what's up with his dramas always having smthn (the age gaps in Café Minamdang and High School King of Savvy? Mostly the Minamdang one. Don't get me wrong I still loved the shows but there was that fact that eek! Aand now incest? Pls no. And thank GOD it wasn't. Phew 😬😅😂)

Continuing, Moo Young feels disgusted (for someone who barely felt anything now he feels this great love for Jin Kang and is so troubled with all the things he's found out, and the things still left for him to know) and that it now makes sense his way of being. The Dr. tells him his past and his father's doing have nothing to do with him and that he's an example of that.

"You're just you."

The "I love you" text. She knew he was in pain.

"Are you really ok with who I am?" "I want to be born again." 🥺💔

"To be born again you have to live in a warm house. A warm house smells like warm rice."

And when she got burnt and he was so worried and it brought another piece of the puzzle of his memory. He and Jin Kang had been together all along.

(Also that scene of them comparing their scars? I was not okay.💔) "They look like a map. And we followed that map to get here."

But he got it wrong and believed they were siblings (also bc of that lying bitch of Jang Woo Sang's sister. Honestly I didn't think he'd believe her. He always was so "Don't trust people, people are nothing." So clever, used to lie and play around like that that I thought he'll ask for proof or something. But that was how he remembered it and well the bitch hadn't lied to him until that point so oh well) and couldn't tell Jin Kang because he loved her. But not the way a brother loves a sister. And how could he tell her that yes, your dad is the same as mine, a murderer who killed our mom and two more people. And even when he found out that thankfully they were not siblings he still didn't want Jin Gook to tell her anything because still the truth wasn't much better. His father killed her parents.

And then Kim Moo Young commited murder trying to protect Jin Kang when he didn't have to.

"I killed someone when I felt human the most."

Jin Kang unable to believe it and breaking down saying he couldn’t have done it, that he couldn’t even stand seeing a bird or a fish hurt. Because she knew him better than anyone. He truly was sensitive.

How Moo Young hugged Jin Gook (See that? No need for hurting him more, man.) Left him a note. Signed with his real name. 💔

"When I met Jin Kang I was able to breathe again." 😭

And when she pointed a gun to her forehead his façade vanished.

"Go back."

"To where? You've been there from the start."

The fucking ending. She made him admit that he wanted to live right before that mf came in and shot her first, that being the last thing he saw, breaking his heart one last time before he was shot and died too.

How she didn't get to say "I love you" back. He only got to say it while he was dying and she just texted it to him. And it was probably the first time he remembered ever saying it to someone. Like when Jin Kang asked him if he had ever really liked someone and he said, "you."

How in the beginning he was the one who looked over and treasured Jing Kang but no one looked over him for so long until she came around again years later without remembering him and finally showed him love.

(And how it was her voice now that woke him up from the nightmare/memory.)

I hated that they always kept Jin Kang in the dark. Like, tell her something pls. Enlighten the woman too. She died and never got to know the mess that made Moo Young break up with her. She missed so much. Trying to protect her that much ended bad.

How different would've been things maybe if Moo Young also had had someone like Jin Kang did. (?)

If Jin Gook had told them everything!!! Instead of being so against them. Moo Young made mistakes but he then tried (and it really showed in his eyes how he instantly regretted it when Jin Gook treated him like that. Because he wasn't doing it for him, he was doing it for Jin Kang.). And Jin Gook was always like, "You can start afresh" (even though he always carried his grief and regret but still, he tried to believe that but apparently that didn't apply to Moo Young or wtf).

Loved, loved, loved the scene when they first slept together, how full of love and how they couldn't help their laughter because of how happy they were at that momemt. All the times she squished his face. So cute hahah. And when he carried her inside his house. How she helped him make his house a home. He didn't even have a single glass because, what was the need for those things? He's the only one who's ever there.

And that scene when he's looking at the night sky and cries and Jin Kang appears there. "How didn't I know? There are so many beautiful things in the world." And then the shot shows him lying there alone. I don't have a heart anymore, this show stepped on it and shattered it. 💔 It was so sad but such a beautiful scene.

When she told her smthn like, I hope you always have things like plants to water and food you have to eat before it spoils and that those stuff cling to you and all that. For him to keep living and enjoying the simple things. Things that in the end they didn't have the chance to live for. 🥺🥲

Other stuff that ended me:

"You planted love in her heart". "I don't believe it but I hope it's true."

"You protected her with your tiny body." "Now I feel proud of my big, ugly scar." (And this got me thinking how he protected her back then and then she did the same and took the bullet for him. But in the end both got burned and both were shot 💔💔💔)

And the songs "Lost", "Star". Loved them. And "Hidden Memory" (again, that whole scene).

Anyways, great name. I have puffy eyes thanks to this drama. The smile left me eyes.

I'll edit this if something else comes up in my head later but I had to write all these so I can process what I just finished watching yesterday evening.

[owlart18]

More clangen fanart, this time with cats of Merryclan, my festive clan!

Speedpaint

(Commission info in pinned post)

Character lore:

Redstar, formerly Redstreak was the second leader of Merryclan after Greenstar. She’s always been a tough cat, very smart and faithful, but suffers from lasting grief after the death of her mother Seeddusk, a cat very popular in the romance department but who always stayed loyal to Redstar’s father, Furledmask. Redstar had two siblings, the late Antlerfoot and Bugstripe. Redstar was mentored by the beautiful Sparkstorm and was a mentor herself to Podgorse, Marshspeckle, Henpelt and Berrypaw. Redstar’s mate was Jackalpelt, a former kittypet. She was a kind and empathetic cat with a strong connection to starclan. Jackalpelt sadly died from complications with a tail wound. Refstar suffered from a tail injury too, from falling rocks, leaving her with a scar. Jackalpelt had two apprentices, Forestpaw and Lilacflight. Redstar and Jackalpelt had seven kits together from 3 different litters, all still living up until recently. Palepelt, Russetstripe, Frozenfur, Doetail, Beamfoot, Sleetmoth and Badgerhaze. Redstar’s first born takes after Jackalpelt and was named after her. Palepelt was a charismatic cat and a fantastic teacher. Mentored by Greenspots and mentor to Lilacflight, taking over when Jackalpelt died. She took a mate in Condorpond and had one child, Hickorylarch. She is was also deputy after Greenspots’ retirement, but Russetstripe took over for her after her death via drowning. Russetstripe is a fierce warrior and a talented speaker, making him an ideal choice for future leader. He never turns away from a fight, earning a scar from a rogue and another from a snake. He was trained by Fallendapple and mentored Mossdust and Heathfoot. His brother Frozenfur was a warrior apprentice turned medicine cat in a time a great trouble and illness. He is a calm tempered cat, much unlike Russetstripe, and very smart due to the teachings of mentor Seanight, and he himself is training Ryepaw. His scars come from a eagle that tried to take him as a kit.

My favourite of Red and Jackal’s children is Doetail. She had a rough start to life. After an incident with a hare, she suffered from damaged eyes for ten moons, dealing with on and off infections before finally losing her sight completely shortly after becoming a warrior. That didn’t stop her from becoming a fantastic hunter and she never lost faith in her self or her abilities. She was also mentored by Greenspots. As an older warrior, she got frostbitten so badly that her mate had to amputate her leg as it was too damaged. Doetail’s mate, Bluefreckle, had an even more difficult childhood, possibly what drew the two cats to each other in the first place. Bluefreckle’s father, Darkstorm, died when her mother, Podgorse, was pregnant with her and her littermates. I wasn’t particularly invested in the family until this message appeared upon the kit’s birth. “Looking down at Darkstorm’s last gift to them, Podgorse vows to protect their new litter of 6 kits. As the sun tracks across the sky, Podgorse’s bleeding gets worse and worse. It was still worth it, Podgorse decided, even as the medicine cat fights an impossible battle to keep them out of Starclan. Still so worth it.” After Podgorse succumbed to the blood loss, I made my own vow to protect her kits at any cost, at least until the were made warriors. The kits in question are, Frogdawn, Sleekslip, Pearbite, Thornstorm, Mudfoot and Bluefreckle. A big ask to keep so many cats alive for twelve moons. Some are still alive today except for Thornstorm who died from water in his lungs, Frogspawn who died of a festering wound, Pearbite who drowned and Mudfoot who was buried alive in a landslide, but they all made it to be warriors like I promised. It was Bluefreckle who suffered the most challenges though. As a newborn kit, she was taken by a hawk, only barely being saved by another warrior. The claw marks she received that day would haunt her for her entire kit hood and apprenticeship. With a shortage of medicine cats, her wounds (and Doetail’s) refused to heal properly. A many moons long infection had her in and out of the medicine cat’s den and on the brink of death so often that she made a decision. To abandon her warrior training to become a healer so no one else would have to suffer like she did. She trained under Quailclaw from nine moons old and onward. Clearly the training paid off as she was left without so much as a scar from the hawk attack. Her smarts and charisma were an asset in the medicine cat’s den. On a patrol, she fell victim to a twoleg trap and has a permanently twisted leg to show for it. Bluefreckle and Doetail don’t have kits of their own yet, but they are aunt’s to Frozenfur and Mudfoot’s new litter, Cedarshade, Sandywhisper, Applebee and Spirecloud. As well as to Russetstripe and Marshspeckle’s Orangeface, Blightpuddle, Quietkit, Crookedkit, Dawnkit and Cinnamonkit.

Finally after many moons together full of both love and great hardship, Doetail and Bluefreckle had a litter of two adorable kits of their own, Hatchkit and Snakekit.

[hesbuckcompton-baby]

ABBOTTS' ANGELS - THE CREW OF 'THE SERAPHIM'

The first all-female flight crew to grace Thorpe Abbotts airfield, the crew of The Seraphim - affectionately nicknamed 'Abbotts' Angels' - come as a unit. Attached at the hip, even in spite of their differences, there is no doubt that every single one of them would put their own life on the line for their team if need be. And, as the war takes its toll, their camaraderie becomes the only thing keeping their heads above water as impossible circumstances threaten to rip them apart forever.

I'm going to be writing one-shots and taking prompts for these girls, so be on the lookout!! (tagging everything with #abbotts angels)

-> KATHLEEN 'KIT' MCKENZIE [PILOT]

A native Californian, Kit's family never recovered from the ravages of the Great Depression, and as a result, she's been going at it alone since the age of seventeen. Working countless dead-end jobs just to keep herself alive, nothing in Kit's life has ever come without her having to fight for it. Desperation leads her straight to the B-17, where her newly discovered knack for flying - and a borderline reckless willingness to do whatever command throws at her - earn her a position as Lieutenant. With a knack for starting fights she can't win, Kit has never been daunted by impossible odds, and will make damn sure no one ever looks down on her, or her crew.

-> DOROTHY 'THEA' GRAVES [CO-PILOT]

Born to middle-class parents, Thea has seemingly been handed everything she could ever want - a comfortable New York apartment, a doting high-school sweetheart turned fiancé, and a teaching position at the local elementary school. However, nothing in her life has ever been able to satisfy Thea's fierce sense of justice. So, when the opportunity arises, she jumps at the chance to fight the spread of Nazi powers, finally taking things into her own hands. Despite their somewhat tense relationship, Thea and Kit are an unstoppable force from the moment they enter the cockpit, forging a wartime bond that will see them through to the end.

-> YARA KATZ [BOMBADIER]

A Jewish legal secretary from New Jersey, Yara has a more personal stake in the war than most. After her father's family is wiped out during the Nazi invasion of Greece, she is swift to enlist herself wherever she can do the most damage, using her keen intelligence and quick thinking to her advantage. Unyeildingly serious and generally void of humour, Yara quickly becomes an integral part of the crew, her dependable nature making her a trusted figure in any crisis. Although she may appear distant from the others, she is as much a part of the Angels as anyone, and will stand up for her crew no matter the cost.

-> SYLVIE GAO [NAVIGATOR]

Raised in England until the age of eleven, Sylvie and her mother travelled to America following the death of her father, where her half-Chinese heritage made it difficult for her to fit in. The 'baby' of the crew, Sylvie was fresh out of high school when she enlisted, putting her keen sense of direction and meticulous attention to detail to use as a navigator. Upon joining the crew of The Seraphim, she finds herself a new group of protectors - although the extent to which she truly needs protection remains to be seen. However, Sylvie's sweet facade is put to the test when survivor's guilt (and a budding relationship with the mechanic Ken Lemmons) begins to pull her in every direction, forcing her to question who she is away from her squad.

-> NORA RAFFERTY [ENGINEER]

Born into generational wealth, no one has ever expected Nora to become anything more than a socialite, living off of her parents' money until the day she dies. As such, it comes as a shock when she develops a passion for mechanical engineering, forging her own path as she pursues her degree, and enlisting with the Air Force upon graduation. Never quite able to escape people's assumptions, Nora is stuck fighting to prove herself just as capable and dedicated as those around her. And, when faced with the direst of circumstances, she seizes the opportunity to step out of the shadow of her upbringing and fight to bring her crew home.

-> MAISIE 'WILCO' FLYNN [RADIO OPERATOR]

Growing up in small-town North Dakota, with no family but her father, Maisie had never been much of a social butterfly. Despite having no real interest in radios, her father's obsession has taught her everything she needs to know, making her as proficient in the machines as the most practised of experts. A natural people-pleaser with an anxious nature, she finds herself affectionately dubbed 'Wilco', derived from the radio shorthand for 'will comply', as she never seems to have a bad word to say about command, no matter how insane or dangerous their missions become. However, when disaster forces Maisie to face the world's harsh realities, she will have to summon all the courage she has to make it home alive.

-> MARTHE 'MARTY' JARLSSON [BALL-TURRET GUNNER]

Almost six feet tall, with a passion for competitive rowing, Marty is used to being seen as intimidating and unapproachable by her male colleagues, so the opportunity to join the first female bomber crew at Thorpe Abbotts never strikes her as daunting, but rather a chance to ditch her day job. When the car factory she's spent the last several years toiling away at converts to plane manufacturing in support of the war effort, Marty realises she can do more good elsewhere, jumping headfirst into her training. With a jolly personality and a penchant for dirty jokes, she brings a sense of life to The Seraphim - but she's not afraid to use people's assumptions to her advantage when the time comes to protect her friends.

-> SADIE BAUER [WAIST GUNNER]

The middle child stuck between two brothers, Sadie is beginning to realise she's never done much of anything with her life aside from playing her guitar in shitty, run-down bars. Through her day job at a university cafeteria, she unexpectedly finds a best friend (and possibly more) in Ivy Heron, a girl with which she couldn't possibly have less in common. When war comes calling, Sadie is struck with a desire to finally make her mark on the world - and when she enlists, Ivy comes too. Scared that her own ambition was the decisive factor in her best friend dropping out of college, Sadie swears to protect Ivy from anything the war can throw at them - a promise that will take them further than they could have ever imagined.

-> IVY 'ANGEL' HERON [WAIST GUNNER]

Born in Salt Lake City to Mormon parents, Ivy grew up as the oldest of five siblings, used to always being told exactly how her life was going to go. But after abandoning the church and running away to live with her aunt at the age of fifteen, Ivy is left with seemingly endless opportunities, travelling to university to study literature and dive head-first into the books she had never been allowed to read as a child. Nicknamed 'Angel' for her baby-faced appearance, she provides the moniker for the flight crew and The Seraphim itself, taking comfort in the community she has forged for herself among the women. Despite her sugary demeanour, Ivy is far from a damsel in distress, and the war will prove the ultimate test of her resolve when she is forced to fight the odds and find a way to safety for herself and those she loves.

-> DAWN DAVIS [TAIL GUNNER]

A natural-born artist, Dawn's love of flying has always been about freedom - about rising above her responsibilities and taking the world at its simplest. War promises to change this. Competitive and impulsive, Dawn had originally only enlisted in an attempt to one-up her sister - a Red Cross volunteer. Even to the most reckless members of the team, she stands out as a rash decision-maker, seemingly unconcerned with anything as material as danger or permanent as death. But beneath her careless exterior, Dawn is simply afraid of what the war will do to her if she lets herself feel the peril of every mission, and denial gives her a way to stay level-headed and alert in a crisis, able to keep her crewmates alive in even the direst of conditions.

tagging @latibvles - thank you for inspiring/enabling me babe <3

[mimikoflamemaker]

Faerunian Writing Challenge - Day 9

Meeting Abdirak the Priest of Loviatar in Goblin Camp

Even if Neve wouldn’t recognize the garb on the priest, the scars and fresh wounds littering his body would along with the goblins jarring encouragements of the goblin would be a clear giveaway that something was wrong. Usually the scent of blood would be enough to alert her, but the old temple was permeated with so many putrid scents she was fairly certain her sense of smell might emerge permanently damaged from their newest misadventure.

She was half tempted to simply slid past the small alcove – they’ve already set Aradin’s mercenary being pulled apart next door free and she knew that the annoying bard was somewhere nearby as well. She didn’t need bumbling fools milling about whenever they’ll find Halsin and things turn ugly.

But then the man stood up and turned, noticing their presence. It was too early to give up their ruse of being true souls, so Neve pulled her lips into a thin line and approached. She noticed various instruments laid out on the stone table: pokes, knives, flails of various shapes, clubs and whips. It was a wonder that the man they set lose had kept his mouth shut all this time. And remained fairly intact.

Then again, killing was never the point of torture. The pain was. And few knew it as well as a Loviatar priest would.

‘Greetings, child’ he addressed her, the tone of his voice needling at the memory of Alven of all things and it cost her to put the grimace away from her face. The priest didn’t appear threatening in anyway, there was no point in antagonizing him.

‘I’ve met few aside goblins since I’ve arrived here’ the man continued. ‘Are you here to assist with a prisoner?’ he asked, and Neve didn’t like the way he was looking at her. His gaze was prickling and uncomfortable – as if he was seeing more than he had any right to be.

‘You mean the one in the other room?’ she asked hoping to turn his attention elsewhere. ‘It’s a wonder he’s still alive with the way they’ve been going at it…’

‘Exactly!’ a smile split the man’s face. ‘Imagine my indignation – I’ve been invited here you see, to teach them, but alas those goblins prove incapable of learning’ he stepped closer, leaning into her, his eyes fixed on her face. ‘To be honest their methods are nothing but crude and primitive…’

Neve resisted the urge to step away, fighting the shiver of uncertainty running across her back.

‘I suppose the priest of Loviatar would have found the performance lacking…’ she tried again, faking indifference.

‘Abdirak, dear one’ the priest introduced himself. ‘You know the Maiden of Pain – I do not hear that often… Let me assure you that pain can be the most intimate form of worship. I can show you if you’re willing, dear one.’

Neve eyes strayed to the instruments laid out on the table. Pain was many things, but hardly the instrument of worship.

‘Oh, don’t you dare say no’ Astarion said and she could tell he was smiling that forced smile of his. She wondered briefly, what were the thoughts he hid behind it, but was denied the possibility to look around when the priest leaned into her even more, his hand hovering next to her face as if he was ready to caress her cheek.

‘Forgive me child, but I can no longer keep my curiosity on a leash’ Abdirak said, sounding, much to her surprise, genuinely concerned. ‘But you do not look well… Your pain beckons me… something terrible has happened to you.’

Well he was not wrong. Neve smiled to herself bitterly. The list was only growing longer and rapidly in the recent days.

She wasn’t the only one interested in the other’s thoughts, the familiar needling in her brain and the steering of her tadpole, told her that someone was seeking entry into her mind. At this point she pushed such intrusions away enough times that slapping it away was no longer difficult – especially when they were this subtle.

‘Observant, are you priest?’ she asked, displeased at her tone. It was harsh, but so obviously forced she wouldn’t be fooling a child with it.

‘There is not much to observe, when you see the same eyes looking in the mirror’ Abdirak sounded nothing, but patient. ‘You bear the scars that run very deep. The pain that have never quite gone away… Please, let me free you of it, if only for a while.’

Neve swallowed around the sudden dryness in her mouth. She didn’t like the how easily the priest touched on things she refused to fully acknowledge. And yet…

Curiously, the expected quip did not come.

‘And how would you do it?’ she chose to ask, as if the tools and the blood were not an indication enough.

‘Through penance of course… offer it to Loviatar and should my lady be pleased with the way you bare the pain she will bestow her most gracious blessing upon you. It will grant you release… I can promise you that.’

‘Fine.’

‘Delightful. Please pick the tool that speaks to you and face the wall.’

Reaching to unbuckle her armor wasn’t really a conscious decision, but once she started she had to make it look so. After a brief consideration, she pointed to a cat.

It arguably made her feel even worse.

‘You can let all of it go, dear one’ Abdirak said, making no mention of the net of scars that stared at him from her bared back. ‘Let it all out and Loviatar will hear you…’

As the first strike burned across her flesh, Neve accepted the fact that it was her only chance to release some of the pressure that was bubbling just beneath her skin. And no one would be the wiser.

So she screamed.

[thecrusadercomrade]

Ooh, some very interesting ideas here!

Lee would be absolutely devastated, obviously. I think he'd be more willing to face things than Kenny, but that doesn't make the situation any easier to deal with. If Lee doesn't sink into a deep depression after this, he'd probably dedicate himself to getting Kenny and his family out of here at all costs, so at least another kid won't die.

Considering that there were still people alive at the Ranch when the raiders left, I think AJ actually would've been okay. That woman Clem shot clearly cared enough to try to protect him, so I think he'd be in good hands. Clementine on the other hand, wouldn't be in a great mental state. She'd be angry, wouldn't know what to do with herself anymore. I think she'd make her way back to Richmond and try to move on, but it wouldn't be easy. At least there she'd have a support network.

Not gonna lie, it's hard to imagine Violet outright leaving the school like that. She may like Clem and AJ, but she's been at the school for almost a decade, while she's known them for only a couple days. If Violet did end up doing that, I feel like she'd regret it pretty quickly, but continue on out of stubbornness.

Ever been at a situation where you're visiting someone else's house, and the people there start arguing while you're still there? That's how I imagine Clem and AJ would feel. Stuck sitting there while the school group screams at each other and chaos breaks out. Not sure what would happen afterwards, if Marlon and Brody would be exiled or merely shunned, but definitely not a great first impression for Clementine and AJ. She might even decide that staying at the school would be a bad idea after seeing THAT.

Clementine would end up the one stuck in bed for a long time. While she could still take part in the planning even in her condition, she wouldn't be able to directly oversee anything. It would come down to the rest of the group to get the defense plan together without her direct help. My main concern here is that someone could end up killed going to the greenhouse, mostly likely Mitch since he seems more likely to jump in through the roof like Clem did. Not sure how well he'd handle those walkers in there.

I feel like this would cause the group to take their things and move immediately. A kid skilled enough to sneak through the cabin undetected, sew herself up, kill a walker, and then leave? She MUST have been working for Carver! This would probably keep Carver off their tail, since he wouldn't find the cabin until after they were gone. Things with Kenny's group would be much more tense at first, since Clem isn't there to break the tension. As for Clem herself, she'd be on her own in the middle of the woods. Unless she finds shelter, or a friendly group, she'd be seriously struggling.

Lee dies believing he's failed the girl he's sworn to protect, probably being put down by Christa. Christa and Omid move on from Savannah, their experiences with everything that went wrong teaching them that groups really are a bad idea and they should stay on their own. Kenny's story goes about the same; assuming the cabin group doesn't show up due to the divergence of them never meeting Clementine, he eventually takes Sarita, Walter, and Matthew to look for Wellington. For as long as he lives, he'll be left wondering whether or not Lee was able to get that girl back in the end...

Clementine would likely have a bit of an easer time with someone she knows looking after her. At the same time, I get the feeling that Kenny wouldn't be the most popular guy around, due to his temper and insistence on doing things his way. At the same time, his survival experience would likely enable him to grab Clem and AJ and leave the moment the bandits attack, thus allowing him to survive into ANF.

Since Clementine isn't out there in the open to throw him off-guard, I could see this going one of two ways. Either Carver takes his time searching the place until he finds the girls. He takes them as hostages in order to convince the group to surrender. The other option is that, noticing the signs of people around, he deduces that they must be out right now, so he leaves to get his people ready for an ambush.

Do you have some "what if's" that you wrote or thought about?

Don't know if this is about DoTWD or TWDG in general... Buuuut I'll just share my What-Ifs from TWDG:

What if Clem was bit instead of Duck?

What if Clem never saved AJ from McCarroll Ranch?

What if Violet went with Clem & AJ after the vote?

What if Brody snapped and revealed her and Marlon's secret during the last dinner in EP.1?

What if Clem was shot instead of AJ in EP.2?

What if Clem sewed her arm, killed the walker, yet escaped the shed and before the Cabin group arrived?

What if Lee and the group never got Clem back?

What if Kenny could stay with Clem and AJ in Wellington?

What if Clem hid with Sarah when Carver came to the cabin?

These are just a few that I remember coming to mind over a period of time lol :P I don't know if I'll get around to writing them or heavily suggest someone else should give them a shot wink-wink.

[mega-ringsandthings-world]

So I had a rewatch of ATLA/Lok, and I was talking this theory over with my brother, that Izumi isn’t Zuko’s daughter. She’s Azula’s. Zuko’s wife/partner was never explicitly shown nor mentioned, and while Izumi’s mother could be Mai, I never saw that as happening after the way things were left between them. This entire theory is based on the premise that Izumi is Azula’s daughter, not Zuko’s, but who Azula sent to Zuko to raise. It might seem improbable at first, but literally everything adds up, and it starts with Azula running away after the events of the comic. After Azula runs away, no other info is really given as to where she went or if she’s even alive, but for this she would have to be alive and in a position of power to boot. So, this is based on her escaping to an extant kingdom, taking up the power in the kingdom, and so being in a place to wheel and deal with Zuko later. And another strong bit of proof for this theory is Iroh Jr. He shares little of his mother’s or even Zuko’s personality, but his personality does directly mirror Azula’s. And even his strategies, style of fighting and lighting bending link directly back to Azula.     So, here’s the theory: - Azula escapes, she is around 15-16 at this point. - She travels to a foreign country/kingdom and as an exiled princess, is taken in by the nobles there. - She marries into the royal family (around the age of 18-20)and rises into power by staging a coup to displace the current ruler. - Her husband/partner is now King/Lord/Ruler and she is Queen, and is the one actually in control. - she begins to plot to return and take the Fire Nation’s throne back from Zuko - She has Izumi at around the age of 20. - At some time around this point she disposes her husband/partner as she now has an heir - It becomes apparent very quickly that Izumi is a non-bender. - This disappoints/worries Azula, as she loves her child and non-benders are seen as weak/inferior in this kingdom - She knows Izumi will never be accepted as heir to the kingdom’s throne by virtue of her non-bending. - When Izumi is roughly 2-3 years old, Azula reaches out to Zuko and stages a secret meeting - She makes a deal with Zuko; she will not use her newly gained power and armies to ever attack Zuko, but in return, Zuko must take Izumi, pass her off as his heir, and then put her on the Fire Nation’s throne and keep her there, and protect her at all costs (Azula sees having her daughter on the throne is as good as herself) - Zuko agrees to keep peace, and takes Izumi back to the Fire Nation, and passes her off as his heir - To ensure that Izumi is never put in any danger, as per Azula’s instructions, he raises Izumi as a pacifist or strongly encourages it - This serves the double purpose of keeping the Fire Nation out of conflicts and wars, and limiting Izumi’s enemies, (both of which could put the non-bending Izumi at physical risk as well) - Zuko does not tell Izumi the truth about her parentage - At around 20 - 23 Izumi has Iroh Jr. - When Izumi has Iroh Jr. Zuko abdicates the throne since Izumi now has an heir - Izumi now rules as Fire Lord - Iroh Jr. turns out to be a firebender, and Azula requests to train her grandson - Zuko secretly arranges for Iroh Jr. to meet and train with Azula - Iroh displays a personality and ability that strongly resemble Azula’s - Azula teaches Iroh Jr. everything she knows, from naval warfare to tactics, (and lighting bending) and Iroh Jr. grows up strongly influenced by her. - Azula makes gifts of dragons to the fire nation, (dragons being of no scarcity in her land) (and also, where tf did all those dragons in lok come from? There has to be a reason) And so on and so forth, through the events of Lok. It might seem a crackhead theory, but I absolutely love it, and the best part is that it’s entirely plausible, with a bot of tweaking. 

[ahjustroza]

Hello, could you write an HC about an GN!MC who used to be a mob boss or run an illegal organization and the Mains 6 + Valerius' Reaction? Doesn't need to be angsty just dramatic

I wanted to go dramatic with the CGs lmao. Also, it got long and everything is under the cut.

Warning!

Headcanon includes the mention of murder, suicide, crime, and depression. So I would say it is NSFW.

Mob Boss MC Headcanons

Asra

He always knew it

He knows everything about you even the things you don't know about yourself

I can see you as the type of boss that doesn't create mass murders for personal gain

However, I can see thievery, blackmailing, and playing your games dirty

Maybe illegal underground market business in the red market (a version of the black market in Vesuvia)

You are smart but also have a soft spot

For him

And only him

Since MC canonically lives with him for a long time I can only picture you being a mob boss in your past before him

But your past is probably still haunting you

You don't necessarily need a tragic childhood to be a mob boss

I want to leave the reasons up to you but I refuse to believe you would be cruel and unreasonable

Because you are all amazing human beings

Many people get into this lifestyle by mistake, choice, or by someone else's force

Whatever reason that made you get into this lifestyle however did change you

You have trust issues, always on defensive mode, and always observing everything around you for possible threats or problems

But he came into your life and became the center of it

You told him what you did before moving to Vesuvia step by step

Not in one go

You tried to see how he would react to you

When you couldn't keep this secret from him anymore, you just told him

It was very impulsive of you

Highly surprising

You told him how you started from the bottom and climbed to the top

you told him how everyone in your home knows your name

How many people were your followers and how if you ask they will come and continue to follow you without a question

You did dirty work, you hurt people too

Violence is something he can not tolerate

At all

But just like you, he is also at the loss of words when any topic comes to the possibility of you leaving

He doesn't want you to go

And you don't want to leave

So expect him to stay away from you for a while

He will not speak of it out loud ever again

Never going to tell anything to even Muriel

No one has to know

Because you are now here and a different person

He will assume that you did what you did to survive

Just like his best friend...

When you lose your memories and slowly starting to gain them back

He is hesitant to answer any question regarding your past

But he knows that he has to

So he does

And you get involved in the red market

Asra is disappointed but you assure him that it is to find ingredients for your magic shop

He will never leave you, but he is not approving illegal business

Yet who he is to judge?

He made a ritual to bring you back by killing the Count of Vesuvia

So he is more on the stick close to you so that you won't get hurt side

Nadia

She will either use your connections for spy mastering or lock you up until she gets rid of your gang/illegal organization

But oh no she will not give up on you for being a simple mob boss oh no

She grew up into the royalty and probably dealt with and seen worst situations

She will not allow you to put yourself into any kind of danger and if she must she will put you on house arrest or even lock you up in dungeons

She dealt with a crazy husband before and she learned from her mistakes

So do as she says

She will give you two options, either listen to her or leave Vesuvia completely

Nadia will want her answer on the spot because if you truly want to be with her, you shouldn't need a lot of time to think about it

She will be even more dominant around you

She will make sure to remind you who has the power

If you leave Vesuvia she will never want to see you again

But she will be there personally to put you to the ground if you cause any trouble

If you choose to stay then you have another two options

You leave the business completely or run it for her favor

Provide him important information about the underground market and other organizations in Vesuvia

Yet that only can happen if you can hide your identity as a mob boss

So get creepy and wear a Tokyo Ghoul mask during business hours

I'd say if you chose to go disguise and spy on the underground for Nadia

You two will be the dictionary definition of the power couple

Like hot damn

Imagine

You live like royalty during the day and go be a mob boss during the night

She will even make you her spymaster if you are willing

Julian

He will volunteer to be your henchman (is this what it is called?)

Yeah

You have now extra trouble because he is not leaving your side

He will even find you more connections for business

He knows key people in different countries and cities

He knows roads to pass without getting caught

He did live this lifestyle for quite a long time after all

Minus the mob boss part

He is by no means not letting anyone he doesn't like to even have an audience with you

My man knows his way with people and not afraid to put up a fight for you

He is impulsive but useful in the underground world

He is a doctor without a license (or it is just a myth? who really knows...) so he was really doing illegal consultations on regular basis lol

He will patch you up when you get hurt and probably will teach you how you can make lethal damage to your enemy during a fight by teaching you anatomy

You will have to send him to horny jail whenever he talks about anatomy because he is a visual learner

And the best way he teaches anything is to show you

So lock him up

It's not like he will resist

He is good with reading body language too

I can think of Julian to be giving you the most understanding reaction when you tell him that you are a mob boss

He has a history (again I remind you)

So if he is in love with you, he is stuck to your side and yes he will still have his leeches with him

His plague doctor mask becomes popular underground too

If you didn't know better, even you would find him scary and intimidating looking during the friendly business hours

And Julian being Julian, he will insist that you find yourself a mask too

So that you will be a power couple

But make it romantic

However, this is the best scenario where you are just doing business in the red market by selling illegal goods, or being a Mob Boss Robin Hood

if you do unacceptable things, such as cruelty towards children and the innocent

And anything violent that including torture and murder,

He will end this all himself

Julian is dramatic but if he had to kill you because there is no other way to stop you he will

Then will follow you not too long after.

Portia

She will hate to hear that.

Portia is strong but fragile at the same time

She has a strong emotional connection to you and you are probably one of those people she trusts more than anyone

So when you say that you are a mob boss she is broken

Hurt and disappointed

But mostly confused

She doesn't know what to do with this

What to do with you, with what you have between the both of you

She loves you a million

But you are wrong with your life decisions

the good and the bad fights inside of her mind when she tries to make a decision

She will either leave everything behind and live a life similar to what her brother had to live

Or let you go to be yourself and get hurt

She will never forget you or never stop loving you

But she will be in a deep depression after you leave her

Most likely never recover

Because you broke the trust she gave you

So if you want her

If you want to be with her

You have to play your cards right

You are on very thin ice here

You can literally break her in a way without a return

So chose your life carefully

What do you want to do as a mob boss?

Will, you hurt people? Cause trouble and chaos? Torture the innocent and break families?

Or will you just do underground illegal trades and sales?

She can keep your secret if you just do your business in the red market

But she will not tolerate you causing harm to others

She will hate it but will stop you no matter the cost before you become the monster you two fought while falling in love with each other

You have her heart

But she has yours too

So she will not allow anyone else to stop you and do it herself

Because she is afraid for others to put you down in a painful way

She'll stop you rather gently

Caress your cheek while crying beside you

She will never forgive you but also will never stop loving you

You are her only big love and will remain like that forever

Or

She will be the person she was while Julian was on the run

Always nervous and always having anxiety and panic attacks

She won't leave you no

No no no no.

She rather dies than spend a day without the thought of you not loving her

Being there for her

She refuses very strongly to let you go and also get caught.

So in this scenario, you two are still together and preferably alive

But she is in agony every second of the day

And you know that this is all your fault

Yet continue anyway.

Muriel

No.

He is not accepting this.

He will be furious and hurt so much that he will tell you to go right away

He trusted you and you betrayed him

There is not much to say for Muriel

He doesn't want to see you again

Even though he wants you

He dreamed about having a peaceful life with you

But he will not go over all the pain he had caused by violence and power

Lucio

You already know he is down

He will do anything for you

Destroy enemy mob boss?

Run the entire underground together?

Invade a city so that you can make the illegal legal?

Do you want someone dead?

Do you want him to arm people for you?

Recruit followers?

Done.

With the potential he has there is no option to stay peaceful in the underground business

Even if you just mention that you want to make a certain business

He'll take it as order the moment it comes out of your mouth

It will be scary

Terrifying even

You will be unstoppable

Valerius

Lmao you probably got him cornered and forced him to work with you

And he got so turned on that said yes on the spot

But made it look as he was the victim here

He seems to be distressed with your connection but secretly he likes the power you have

You do as you please, take whatever you want

And people in the palace have no idea

He knows that you are smart

Otherwise, you wouldn't be able to become a boss and run your business flawlessly

He'll support you financially of course

Under the table

But the real job he does is to give you information

He is also good at creating gossips and rumors as well

He is connected to the high class and works in the palace so it is really hard for people to make any kind of connection between him and you

He pretends to make investigations about your illegal business but what he actually does is mislead the palace

In return, you get him precious stuff

Expensive wine, silk clothes, anything he wants

Oh my god Valerius is your sugar baby and he doesn't even know

Whenever you tell him to see you he is there the moment he can leave his work

He likes to be around you but plays hard to get

He loves to see you struggle and frustrated

He will not give you away but don't expect him to go down with you if you get caught either

He cares about his reputation

The best he can do is to help you escape in a way people can't make connections with him

Then you will most likely become his sugar baby-ish for a while

He will boss you around but the second you remind him who you are he will act bratty

Oh does he likes being bratty