#tbh i probably should have figured this was a thing
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
@zepskies
Ooo Yay! I can't wait to see what you thought about this UNHINGED fic 😂
On one hand, perfect makeout music. On the other hand, Dean is SOOOO freakin' jealous, but it's so frustrating that pushing down his own feelings for her has resulted in him being such a dick to her, before and during this moment. 😫😫
Oh yes, definitely setting the mood for the reader and Ben in the back seat lol. We all know that Dean has probably pulled the same thing in the past 😆 Dean is VERY jealous and it's only pushing the reader away from him more, but he can't stop it. He's stuck in a vicious cycle that is turning into one of Dante's circles of hell when Ben showed up LOL.
*snorts* I love both of these analogies. 🤣
Thank you! I was like... what else has a roadtrip in it? 😂
Deaaaaaan you complete and utter idiot!! What's even worse is that she did feel that spark with him when they first met, until he opened his big dumb mouth lmao.
He really has pushed down his feelings, a few people have pointed out to me that Dean is acting like the playground bully who likes a girl but can't express it in a healthy way and that is one million percent what's happening here lol. The reader did like him when they first met, but again he just didn't express his feelings in a healthy way and now he has to sit and watch Ben and the reader make out in the back seat of his car 😂
Lol sounds like the Winchester Way to me. 🫠
Absolutely 👏🏻 The reader is basically the male version of Dean tbh. Except she shoved down her feelings and then went to sleep with someone who looked exactly like Dean 🤣 Because that was also healthy right? lol
My heart was so torn throughout this entire fic, you have no idea!! The way she manages to pacify him loll. So sweet and sexy in a way, but also, you get the sense that she thinks Ben might just see her as a pretty face, even if he does care about her deep down? It makes you wonder where her heart is truly going to lie at the end of all this angsty love-triangle goodness.
Mine was too! I literally kept going back and forth from Ben to Dean, trying to figure out who she should be with. Because she has incredible chemistry with Ben and she understands him in a way that I think he's not used to. And on the other hand Dean understands her because she's a hunter, he's just being a stubborn idiot 🤣
AND you're right! The reader thinks that Ben only sees her as a pretty face at the moment. She doesn't understand that he has started to develop feelings for her. But I think that the reader also believes that Ben has the possibility to become more than just someone she sleeps with. That he could love her if she let him and if she loved him.
Oh my God this part was completely unhinged and it was hilarious! But the way Ben decides to "get rid of her" is unfortunately on-brand, not caring enough about the collateral damage, the risk of the reader getting hurt. 💔 Even though he does check on her afterwards, the way Dean protected her has my heart swinging back to him and melting in a whole different way!! 😫 Gah! This is so conflicting! loll don't do this to me, friend. 😂😂 I need to dive right into Part 3 so I get to see what happens between her, Ben, and Dean, and just who will confess their feelings first...
Yes see, I went to see Wicked with my friends the weekend before I wrote this and you have no idea how much I love the OC Iris that I made for this fic. I was also thinking "how many references to How To Lose A Guy In 10 Days can I put in one fic?" lol. I was sad that I had to kill her- but it had to be done. There needed to be a dramatic moment where Dean chose to save the reader and give the reader a little bit of doubt about Ben and also show the way he is (unfortunately). But Ben coming to check on the reader literally put me on the fence all over again because he was being soft for her 😭
I'm so sorry to do that to you my friend!! But admit it, you love the angst lmao 💞😉
Thank you so much for all your comments my lovely friend! I always love to hear what you think! And I can't wait to read what you think of Part 3! 💗
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/15795ab8f22767cb6871b61577a24823/c48299a0cad2569a-02/s540x810/883c03162679cf7018a4847d959846db257a52c0.jpg)
Part 2: It Is A Big Deal
Pairing: Soldier Boy x f!reader, Dean Winchester xf!reader,
POV: Reader POV
Summary: Dean's in for a rude awakening when he finds out exactly what you did when you got stranded in another universe.
Tropes: Frenemies (Dean and the Reader), Awkward Situation, Multiverse Problems, ANGST
Word Count: 7.4K
Warnings: I'm gonna label this 18+ just to be sure. Cursing, Making Out, DEATH, Violence (only a little), Jealousy, Pining, Kinda Sad Vibes In Some Places, Sexual Innuendo, References to Sex, Feelings, Angst, Self Deprecating Thoughts? References to Past Sex (it happens quite a bit). References to Future Sex. Soldier Boy Being Soldier Boy (Everyone knows he’s a warning). Dean Winchester Being Dean Winchester (aka. being moody and super hot).
Listen While You Read: Jealous Again By The Black Crowes
Note: This is told from Reader's perspective. Any references to the reader is made using you or your. There is no use of y/n. I tried my best to proofread, but nobody's perfect. If you don’t like, don’t read, but if you do like, you��re my favorite!
Internal monologue is in italics and is in first person
A/N: It was so fun to come back to this universe again! Thank you so much to everyone for all the love and support that you've gave me in writing the first part and thank you for all the encouragement to write a part 2! And also please don't forget to check out Stranded by @justagirlinafandomworld that inspired me to write this fic!💗
Main Masterlist
Series Masterlist
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/d565fe329fad53251da69f2110204a3a/c48299a0cad2569a-78/s540x810/b241dfe82f48198f046888950f93bd2011f9996a.jpg)
"Can the two of you stop playing find my tonsils and tell me where the hell it is I'm supposed to be driving to?" Dean grouses from the driver's seat while Sam leans over a road map squinting to look at the small print.
"Ready For Love" is playing over the speakers, barely audible over the thud of fat raindrops pummeling the windshield, blocking out the world around you, and sending the shadows racing across your skin where Ben and you are sitting in the backseat.
“Well, if you’d given me a few hours to fuck her at the motel instead of throwing a bitch fit-" Ben begins to say, turning his gaze your face to stare at the back of Dean's head with a lazy smile.
“Dean why do you care?" You interrupt Ben with red cheeks. "I know for a fact worse things have happened in the backseat of your car than Ben and me making out."
"Really? Because I can’t think of anything worse that you and him sucking on each other's tongues and helping the spread of mono." Dean's hands tighten on the steering wheel and his shoulders tense.
He’s more wound up than a tinker toy.
It has been exactly thirty three minutes since Dean's mental breakdown back at the motel when Ben showed up. Furthermore, despite how much Dean had screamed at you at the motel, it appeared that he was still going to act like a two year old who wanted a cookie before dinner.
Sam's suggestion for the four of you to figure out why Ben was here had been a welcome distraction from Dean's spiral. It had prompted all of you to pile into Baby to try and find where it was that Ben landed in your universe and find a clue as to why.
But so far the trip had been less like riding in the Mystery Machine and more like riding with the Griswold's on their road trip to Wally World…
Dean had been supportive of trying to find a solution to what he deemed the "Ben problem," but it appeared that Dean was going to spend every waking minute getting on your nerves.
Honestly, what's new?
You didn’t understand why Dean was so damn argumentative whenever you showed up, it was like he lived to make your life as difficult as possible.
It had always been that way. Since the first day you met Sam and him at Ellen's bar forever ago, Dean had never once said something nice about you or to you.
He always found some little thing to nit pick, whether it be your aim, your research skills, or your technique when hunting and you were sick of it. Each time the two of you worked together, it was Sam's job to make sure it didn't end in bloodshed. Even Cas noticed Dean's underlying hostility towards you and when he asked Dean what was wrong, Dean had brushed him off with a "not now Cas."
Worse was the time that you got hurt (only a minor injury) on a hunt a few weeks ago when you got thrown into a glass cabinet while facing down a poltergeist. Dean had chewed you out for a good twenty minutes and even with Sam's ability to intervene, you'd broken Dean's nose for speaking to you like that, and then rushed off to your room in the bunker before he had a chance to see you cry.
It was the one thing that you never allowed yourself to do in front of Dean Winchester, cry. He didn't deserve your tears, especially not when he was being a total grade A asshole.
When Sam came in later to help you get patched up, you asked him why Dean hated you and Sam tried to convince you otherwise, but you knew the truth.
Dean Winchester hated you, and you had no idea why. So you decided to stop trying to make him like you, because if he was going to act like a total dick he didn't deserve you being nice to him.
You knew that was why you liked Ben more. Ben appreciated you (sort of), he wasn't mean, he listened to you (sometimes), and he did give you compliments… well, they all revolved around the way you looked and that was nice, but just you wanted someone to give you a compliment that had to do with something else. Or maybe just a simple "I see you."
Is that so hard to ask?
Your few flings in the past hadn't been anything special. You didn't have the kind of stable lifestyle that prompted or supported long serious relationships, especially with non-hunters. Not to mention you'd always had this fantasy about meeting another hunter who understood exactly what you went through and what you had gone through over the years. It was often difficult to find a non-hunter who could understand that.
The bunker was the first permanent address that you'd ever had. Your mother had been one of the best hunters in the US, known by all, and you never met your dad, which meant that growing up on the road was the only life you knew. She'd died a year before you started working with the Winchesters which meant that you didn't exactly have anyone that you cared about or anyone who cared about you.
The thought often brought the feeling of loneliness stirring in your chest, but you pushed it down, throwing everything you had into hunting.
Healthy right?
Ben's muscular arm is wrapped around your waist, his hand splayed over your lower back to keep you tight against his chest so there is no space between the two of you, while your hands locked at the back of his neck. You didn't usually like PDA that much, occasionally yes, but you'll admit that you were only allowing yourself to give in to Ben a little more, because you liked how much it annoyed Dean.
Yes, you thought that it was absolutely ridiculous how Dean was acting, but you wanted to give him a taste of his own medicine. Because in all the years you'd known him, you’d never found one thing to hold over his head or one thing that really irritated him, and Ben was working like a charm.
It also felt really good to kiss him, but that was beside the point.
You understood that Dean was having a psychotic break with his constant proclamations that Ben "was him," but you wanted to at least understand why Dean was still hung up on it.
Ben isn't Dean. Sure they have the same face, but Ben is different… isn't he?
When you'd encountered Ben for the first time you had done a double take, but the more you were around him, the more you appreciated the way he treated you differently from Dean. Yes he was a little sexist, but Ben made you feel wanted and Dean had a way of making you feel stupid and often like a burden, as if you'd been plopped on his doorstep like a box of kittens and he was stuck with you.
There was only so much that you could take.
You didn't know what you'd done to earn such hostility. Dean was far from sexist, and you'd seen him interact with other people, it was just you he treated differently and it made you want to strangle him.
"Calm down kid-" Ben sighs.
"Stop calling me that!" Dean turns around to glare at the man next to you.
"Keep your eyes on the road." Sam says, not looking up from the map. He didn't need to.
"What a wonderful suggestion Sammy, but see I can't because I have no idea where the hell it is I'm going!" Dean snipes at his brother.
I swear at this point if Gabriel pops out of nowhere and tells me that this is all just a fucked up dream, I'd believe it.
"Stop being damn hormonal kid, and keep driving." Ben rolls his eyes and moves his lips to your throat, nipping and biting along the flesh visible over the top of your jacket, making you gasp softly and lean into Ben's warm embrace.
Your eyes meet Dean's in the rear view mirror and just for a second you see something flash through them that isn't anger, but it's gone just as soon as you clock it.
What was that?
Dean slams on the brakes and Ben tightens his grip on your body so you don't go flying forward into the bucket seat.
"What the fuck is wrong with you?" You snap, curiosity gone, as you glare at Dean.
The tension in the car is high, popping and crackling around the four of you like popcorn. You still couldn't understand why Dean had such a problem with Ben. If anything you'd think that they'd get along a little bit.
"I am not being hormonal or whatever other chauvinistic shit that is about to come out of your mouth." Dean snarls, ignoring you, as he turns and narrows his eyes at Ben. "And I am not your chauffeur. So tell me where the hell it is I'm going so you can get the fuck out of my car and out of my life!"
Ben opens his mouth to retort something, no doubt that'll trigger Dean, but you speak before he can.
"Ben, do you remember anything about where you came through?" You ask him. You were trying to be more diplomatic even though Dean was making your blood boil.
Just because Dean is mad at me does not mean that he gets to take it out on Ben. Ben hasn't done anything wrong. He got sucked into this reality and immediately got pulled into Dean's soap opera.
Ben huffs out a sigh as he turns back to look at you. His gaze softens a little as his eyes meet yours, turning from a dark green to a jade. "There was a building-"
"Oh wow, how helpful!" Dean snarks. "Did you hear that Sammy? There was a building! Mystery solved!"
Ben whips his head in Dean's direction, the air in the car growing hot as Ben's skin begins to heat, but you gently lay your hand on his cheek to bring his gaze back on you. "Dean is an asshole. We all know." You say to Ben, reassuring him and ignoring the look Dean gives you when you say it. "Do you remember anything about the building?"
Getting Ben angry wasn't the way to get information out of him, he was, after all, more like Dean than you were willing to admit. And just as you'd seen Dean get worked over by numerous women, including Bella, sweet talking worked the best.
Well, it never worked when you tried to do it, because Dean refused to treat you any way other than an annoyance.
But two could play that game, especially with the way that Dean was acting right now.
Ben's jaw tightens and you know that he's biting back some remark to throw Dean's way, but you pull him closer, trailing your hand over his bearded cheek to keep his attention and gently bring your lips to his. You feel the tension shift from Ben's shoulders beneath the palms of your hands as he relaxes into the kiss, and this time Ben smiles when you pull away, giving your hips an encouraging squeeze. "It was a school or some shit. And there was a billboard for "World's Biggest Beer Can.""
"Okay. We can work with that." Sam says giving you a sympathetic look before pulling out his phone to type something in.
At least Sam is being normal about this whole thing.
Sam and you always got along, from the start he was the older brother that you never had, and it was refreshing. Not to mention Sam was your best and probably only friend. The hunter life was lonely and you found it difficult to make friends anyway, but something about Sam always stuck. He got your abnormal sense of humor, he gave the best hugs, and he stood up for you when things got heated between Dean and you. It was his idea for you to move into the bunker with him and Dean, and also him that convinced Dean to let you move in.
It had taken days for Dean to finally say yes. And when he did, he made you move into the bedroom next to his as if he wanted to keep an eye on you because he didn't trust you.
And as much as you hated living with Dean, living with Sam made up for it. You liked helping him research while Dean bitched and moaned about reading through dusty volumes, liked helping him clean up while Dean followed behind you as if you couldn't be trusted, liked helping Sam try to make dinner that ended up more burned than anything else until Dean stepped in and shooed the both of you from the kitchen so he could make something, and liked kicking back on the couch watching movies with Sam while eating copious amounts of popcorn.
Unfortunately, Dean didn't get the hint that you wanted him to leave you alone so he'd follow Sam and you, crack open a beer, and proceed to give a personal commentary on the movie the two of you were watching, occasionally throwing a look in your direction as if he was checking that you were listening to him. Weirder still was the fact that Dean would do that when Sam wasn't with you.
You noticed that sometimes, that no matter where you were in the bunker, Dean just happened to find himself in the same room. But that didn't mean he would speak, sometimes he would just be cleaning one of his guns or quietly reading through a dusty volume or writing something down in a notebook, but you swore sometimes you thought that Dean was looking at you. Each time you looked up though, he was looking down at whatever else it was he was doing.
It was those moments that made you think that things could be civil between the two of you, and then he'd get on your case for doing something he deemed "wrong" when you knew you did it right the first time as if you hadn't been a hunter as long as he had.
He probably does that because he doesn't trust me.
Dean grumbles something under his breath and turns his gaze back out the windshield, watching the wiper blades go back and forth over the glass, crossing his arms over his chest. Ben frowns and you know that he must have been able to hear whatever it was Dean said.
Why can't we all just get along for five minutes? Is that too much to ask?
"Alright I've got something." Sam says ending the uncomfortable silence in the car. "The World's Biggest Beer Can is in Northwood about ten miles ahead of us."
"Finally. At least someone is pulling their weight." Dean states before he hits the gas, the force throws you backwards into the seat.
Your gaze flicks up to the rearview mirror and notice that Dean is watching you again, but you turn away to Ben who smiles wide and pulls you back towards him for a kiss.
But deep down you can't help but wonder if Dean had been watching the two of you in his rearview mirror the whole time and why he cared so much.
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/d565fe329fad53251da69f2110204a3a/c48299a0cad2569a-78/s540x810/b241dfe82f48198f046888950f93bd2011f9996a.jpg)
The building that Ben remembers is in fact, an abandoned school.
The roof sags inward allowing rainwater to pool in the front lobby over black and white checkered tiles, the lockers are rusted and thrown to the floor at odd angles making you worry about the possibility of tetanus, and there is an ungodly stench that you can only describe as old gym socks, axe body spray, and unwashed feet.
Ben's nose wrinkles where he stands beside you, and you're sure that no matter what your sense of smell is experiencing it's a million times worse for him.
You press your lips into a tight line, toeing around a puddle of something gray and sticky that you can't identify, but know for a fact you don't want it in your shoes. Your eyes squint into the looming darkness that grows the more you stare down the forgotten hallways.
It’s always gotta be an old creepy building. Just once I want to get to investigate a donut shop or a burger joint or a Starbucks.
"Any of this looking familiar Captain Sexual Harassment?" Dean asks turning with his flashlight to point in Ben's face.
Ben shrugs and squints at the offending light. "I don’t fucking know."
"Enlightening." Dean huffs out a breath. "Well, guess we can split up and-"
Thank God I won't have to listen to Dean mutter things under his breath and freak out.
"Fine." You interrupt. "Come on Ben." You start to walk down one of the dark hallways, but Dean slides in front of you to block your path.
"No way. You're not going with him." Dean waves his flashlight in Ben's face again and you can see the twitch on the corner of Dean's mouth to see how much he enjoys blinding him.
Why does he always have to act like such a child?
"Why?" You demand.
"Because as soon as Sam and I get out the picture, Grandpa over there is going to pull you aside and fuck you in one of the classrooms." Dean says it without blinking, but it makes you flush red in embarrassment and anger.
"No, he's not!"
"Yes, he is!"
Dean is so close that you can feel his warm breath on your face. His eyes are narrowed in anger, but you can see another emotion flick through them so quickly you think you imagined it. It was the same emotion that you thought you saw in the car, but you can't identify it, not yet.
Ben's hand comes down on Dean's shoulder, a wide smirk on his face. "Look kid, I get it. She's fucking hot and I know you think I'm trying to horn in on your action-"
"What the hell are you talking about?" Dean exclaims shaking off Ben's hand.
"You're jealous because she decided to be with a real man instead of you." Ben shrugs. His gaze travels up and down Dean as if appraising him before he shakes his head with a chuckle. "I can't blame her. Someone like you couldn't handle her.
"I could handle her just fine!" Dean snaps back his face flushing as he forces his chest against Ben's, who only smirks back.
What did he just say?
Your entire body goes stick straight in surprise and you turn your head to stare at Dean. In all the years that you'd known Dean he's never once said something like that to you.
Sure there was the night you met…
You hadn't thought about it in years. You'd been back in town because Bobby had called asking you to help out some friends of his on a case and you'd stopped in to Ellen's bar to see Jo. Dean had come on to you and you'd splashed a beer in his face and also maybe pinned him down against the bar. It had been awkward the next day when you found out that Dean and Sam were the friends that Bobby wanted you to help out, but you pushed past all the weird feelings to help.
Dean had flirted with you that night and you will admit to yourself that you thought Dean was attractive before he opened his mouth, but since that night the two of you hadn't spoken about it. In fact, you were both perfectly happy pretending that it didn't happen.
Or so you thought.
Dean's dark green eyes flick to yours in realization. "That's not what I meant."
"Sure kid." Ben's smirk grows to Cheshire Cat proportions.
"Stop calling me that!"
The weird thing was, you'd seen Dean lose his temper, it always flared fast and hot broken up with sarcastic comments, but for some reason this felt different and you didn't understand why. It didn't feel like Dean just getting angry because Ben was getting under his skin, it felt like something else.
"Whoa!" You get between the two of them for the second time in an hour. "If you guys keep fighting like this I'm going to put you both in time out!"
"He started it!" Dean glares at Ben, who doesn't look the least bit upset.
"I don’t care who started it! You're grown men and you're still acting like toddlers. I shouldn't have to separate you." You snap waving around your flashlight at Dean.
"How about this?" Sam sighs from where he stands a few feet away. "I'll go with Ben and the two of you can try not to shoot each other."
"Why can't I go with you?" You sigh to your friend.
"You want to leave them together? Alone?" Sam raises his eyebrow.
Not really.
Sam takes your silence rightfully as confirmation, because the both of you knew if you left Dean and Ben together it would probably be a Thunderdome situation or a reenactment of the WWE.
"Maybe we shouldn't split up." Dean says looking at his brother.
"You scared kid?" Ben smirks. " No wonder she decided to fuck me instead of you. You’re acting like a little bitch."
"You son of a bitch-" Dean finally snaps and launches himself towards Ben, but your hand fists in the back of Dean's leather jacket to stop him from starting a fight that you know he won't win.
It wasn't that you thought Ben was a better fighter than Dean, it was that Ben had super strength and would have no qualms ripping Dean in half. And despite how much Dean annoyed you, you didn't want him to die. Sure he was a jerk, but he didn't deserve that after everything he'd been through, and Sam didn't need to bear witness to that.
"Fine." You say. "Ben please go with Sam."
Ben rolls his eyes and follows after Sam, leaving Dean and you standing in the lobby alone, the only sound the soft plop of water echoing down the empty hallway.
Great. Now I'm stuck with Dean in a creepy old building. It's a dream come true. The stuff of Disney movies.
"Why did you do that?" Dean snaps at you when Ben and Sam turn a corner out of sight.
"You should be thanking me! Ben would rip you in half without batting an eye!" You turn back towards the empty hallway and try to put as much distance as you can between Dean and you.
Distance is good, nice. It means that I can only partly hear his disapproval.
"You don't know that." Dean catches up with you, sweeping the path in front of you with his flashlight looking for holes in the floor.
"Yes, I do. I've seen him do it before."
By now you were aware that there was a chill in the air, it was unnatural, creeping down the hallway in a thin mist that made a shiver crawl down your spine. Dean must sense it too, because he pulls his gun at the same time you do.
That or he's doing it because he's about to go Rambo on Ben's ass.
Because that'll end well…
"If he rips people in half why do you like him so much?"
“He’s not a bad person if that’s what you’re getting at. Ben did it to save me.” You point your flashlight into one of the classrooms along the hallway noting the rotted desks tipped over onto the checkered floor. “He wouldn’t hurt me.”
Ben's world was filled with more than a few crazed individuals, and when you'd been in his universe Ben had stepped in when a supe threw themselves at you. Truthfully, even though Ben did what he did to protect you, watching him pull someone apart with his bare hands made you sick to your stomach. Given what you'd seen, that was saying something. But you knew that Ben wouldn't hurt you, he wasn't that kind of man, and you weren't afraid of him.
“You’ve known him for five days! How can you tell after five days?!” Dean nudges a cardboard box with his boot sending a family of cockroaches scuttling into the shadows.
"Because I can!" Your lip curves up in distaste at the appearance of the roaches and try not to imagine all the walls infested with the little bugs.
You didn't like roaches. Especially ones that all of a sudden developed the ability to fly in your presence as if it were a miracle.
The two of you continue to walk down the hallway, the sound of your footsteps masking the constant dripping noise that comes from the floor above.
Your temper was flaring all over again. You didn't think that you needed to explain any of this to him. Dean never felt the need to discuss his extensive history with women with you and you didn't feel the need to discuss the ins and outs of your and Ben's situation.
"Come on-" He begins to say, but you don't want to hear it.
"Dammit Dean just fucking drop it." You throw your shoulder against a door at the end of the hallway, putting everything you have into it and a little more. You were getting frustrated at Dean's continuous commentary on your life. "I don’t want to talk about this anymore or listen to any of the ridiculous reasons why you think that it's any of your business who I sleep with."
“I think it is my business because you were about to reenact the scene from Titanic in the back of my car!”
“Oh please. I’m sure that you’ve reenacted it billions of times back there. Mr. Saturday Night!” You roll your eyes hitting the door again with your shoulder.
“It’s my car!" Dean shouts, moving you out of the way in a surprisingly gentle way, before he savagely kicks down the door. "I can do whatever I damn well please!”
I wonder if Sam and Ben are having a better time than us. It wouldn't be difficult to.
The door opens with a snap under the force of Dean's kick depositing Dean and you into a large auditorium. The seats are a faded gray and the curtains that hang from the sides of the stage, once blood red, were more of a muddled pink stained with splotches of dark spots and filled with holes the size of the Impala.
Crawling vines and ferns have begun to tangle over the empty seats and over the floors, absorbing anything in their path. The wooden stage is dilapidated and caving in on itself, the boards jutting upwards instead of laying flat as they should in some places from years of water damage. The carpet beneath your feet is squishy and moth eaten, and each step sends another cloud of dust into the air making the room hazy and you cough into your elbow.
"Not to mention he's me!" Dean continues, tramping into the room behind you.
"How many times are you going to say that?" You pinch the bridge of your nose, trying your best to keep it together.
"As many times as I have to, to get the point into your thick skull!"
You whirl around and poke your finger into his chest. "You know what Winchester? You can take all your opinions and shove them right up your uptight ass!"
"The two of you don't get along at all. Odd given how you seem to get along with my fiancé." A bored voice says from somewhere behind you. "But it is a lot more entertaining than I thought it was going to be."
Dean and you both lock eyes and turn to look in the direction of the voice, but there's no one there.
"Um, did you hear-" Dean begins to ask.
"Yes I did." You reply clicking the safety off your pistol.
"Just checking."
"Though I will say, with the way today is going for you and if this is you having a psychotic break, I wouldn't be surprised that you're having auditory hallucinations."
"Shut up." Dean sighs.
"Hello?" You shout, looking around the empty auditorium for some answer, but it remains empty.
Dean snorts. "Now who's craz-"
"Hello?" The voice mocks in a nasally voice. "Wow you're pathetic. I don't understand what he sees in you."
"You call me pathetic, but you're the one hiding. So why don't you come out?" A chair from the front row plucks itself off the ground and hurls itself at your head. You duck and it sails into the aisle behind Dean and you.
"You're not even that pretty." The voice continues and you can imagine a pout on the end of its words like a petulant child who wishes to get their way.
This is so fucking weird.
"Thanks." You reply dryly. "I like to think I've got a great personality."
"You don't." Dean mutters, making you throw an elbow into his side.
A high pitched giggle echoes through the space making it impossible to identify where it came from, until finally a woman materializes on the stage. You blink your eyes to make sure that she's really there.
Her blonde hair falls over her shoulders in perfect ringlets, and she's wearing a bright pink fur trimmed dressing gown. The kind you'd see on an eccentric billionaire's trophy wife who spent most of her day drinking gin martinis poolside while being fanned by cabana boys or the kind that she'd be wearing when she heard of her husband's "untimely demise." There's a silver diamond crown perched on top of her head and she's smoking a cigarette from a long white cigarette holder, while she lounges back on a golden throne.
What. The. Fuck.
"Do you see her too?" You whisper to Dean out of the corner of your mouth.
"You mean Glinda the Good Witch the later years? Yeah I can." Dean replies looking just as confused as you do. "You thinking Gabriel?"
"I thought he was dead."
"He's pretended to be dead before." He shrugs.
"Fair enough. Any reason why he's making us see her?"
"Maybe your new boyfriend has a fetish."
"Hasn't anyone told you that it's rude to whisper?" The woman says, taking a drag from her cigarette.
"Sorry. Um. Who are you?" You ask.
"I don't speak to homewreckers." Her face contorts into a sneer. You watch her eyes shift from Dean to you. "But I'll answer for your friend. I'm Iris, Benjamin's Fiancé."
If pigs could fly right now an entire fleet of them would be taking flight around you. You tried to wrack your brain remembering a single time that Ben said that he had a fiancé or was in a relationship at all, and you can't find a single moment.
Well… today officially sucks.
"Wow. Nice." Dean looks at you with a scoff. "Real nice."
"Hey woah, I didn't know he had a fiancé." You hold up your free hand in surrender. "He never said anything about a-"
"Hey gorgeous. Did you find anything?" Ben says materializing behind Dean.
"You're engaged?" You shout.
"No?" Ben looks confused. "Who told you that?"
You point a thumb over your shoulder to Iris, who is still lounging on the stage completely in her element. She giggles and wiggles her fingers in a cute wave.
"Hey Benny Wenny, did you miss me?" Her lips curl up in a wide smile when she rises from the throne, her bright blue eyes crinkling around the edges. The air around her seems to sparkle, sending scattered light out into the broken seats.
Ben is still staring up at the woman, looking utterly confused.
"You know that freak?" Dean whispers to Ben who is now standing shoulder to shoulder with him.
"Fuck no."
"Well, congratulations Benny Wenny." Dean snorts. "Guess you're getting married."
"I am not-"
"And don't worry, of course I'll be your best man." Dean continues, holding back laughter.
"Shut the fuck up kid!" Ben snaps at Dean, before turning back to the woman on the stage. "Look baby, I don't know who you are but-" Ben begins to say to the woman, who only laughs.
She throws back her head, golden curls bouncing with the force of her body moving, laughing for an unnatural amount of time before she locks her blue eyes on Ben again.
“Stop being silly. We met a few months ago at Legend’s party. We had a few drinks and then you came back to my apartment where we made love for hours-“ Her cheeks blush. “It was sooooo romantic. What I always dreamed about!”
“Um-“
“My parents are so excited to meet you and my little sister said that she’s so happy to have a big brother!” She giggles. “I even made us matching t-shirts to wear on our honeymoon and a scrap book of our children!" She holds up a magenta colored bedazzled photo album that’s the size of a medium sized dog.
Wow she put a lot of work into that.
“Children?” Ben stutters, his voice cracking on the end a little bit. It's the first time that you've ever seen him look afraid.
“What they’ll look like, where we’ll vacation each year, where we'll live, where you'll work-” Her expression turns sour, eyes flashing a dark pink as she glares in your direction. “But then you met that little whore who took you away from me and poisoned your mind.” She points a perfectly manicured pink nail at you. “So I decided to bring you here so you could help me kill her.”
“I’m sorry rewind-“ You say holding up a hand. “You brought Ben here? How?"
"I found a website while I was looking at destination weddings." She shrugs.
"There are websites about traveling through different universes that show up in the search engine-" Dean begins to say.
"DON'T QUESTION ME!" The girl shrieks and the entire room begins to shake.
"And you wanted Ben to be here because?" You haven’t lowered your gun. Frankly you had no idea what her powers were. She looked more like she would start tap dancing down the yellow brick road rather than start hurling chunks of the stage at you, but you needed a plan.
“Because we’ll get to share this moment together.” Iris sighs looking over at Ben again, who is just as shell-shocked as he was a moment ago.
“Killing me?”
Iris nods enthusiastically. “We'll make love on top of your dead body and no one will come between us ever again!”
Dean snorts under his breath and you elbow him again, trying not to think of the image.
Please let this be Gabriel messing around with me. Because if it's not my life is officially a joke.
The three of you stand there for a minute looking up at where she prances on the stage in mixed stages of disbelief.
And just as Iris takes a step forward, a sandbag falls on her head. She crumples to the floor like a sack of potatoes as Sam appears in the wings of the stage looking from her to where the three of you are watching.
"You guys okay?" He calls.
"Yeah." Ben shrugs. "Too bad about her though. She was hot."
He's kidding right?
"The crazies always are." Dean adds with a sigh, patting him on the back.
"I'm so happy the two of you are having this bonding moment, truly I am, but-" You begin to say, turning your back to the stage, but as soon as you do Sam goes flying across the room and into one of the fern plants.
"That was so uncool!" Iris squeals, hovering over the stage, her hands glowing an unnatural magenta color. "Ben and I are meant to be together, we're soulmates, perfect, fated, destined, and no one is going to stand in my way."
The entire room begins to tremble with the force of her anger, dust floats down from the ceiling as it begins to crack and crumble under her powers. You can feel the warmth of Ben's skin as he begins to power up the beam in his chest, burning through the air like a supernova.
There's a crackling sound that comes from above and you look up to see a giant piece of the ceiling falling in slow motion towards your body. Dean shouts your name, but he sounds far away, the sound ringing through the few seconds that you still have left before it crushes you.
But the hit doesn't come from above, it comes from the side.
Dean tackles you, just as the piano sized piece hits the ground where you had been standing a second ago, to the ground, cradling your head in his hands. Your bodies tumble into the moth eaten carpets as Ben explodes, the heat and power of the beam causing more of the room to fall around the two of you.
There's a terrible high pitched wail that's cut off abruptly mid scream and you don't need to be a genius to know what or rather who it was.
Dean covers your body with his and your hands come up under his arms to hold him tighter to you. You bury your face into the warmth of his coat where his throat and his shoulder meet with a whimper as everything around the two of you shudders and shakes. He doesn't pull away, his muscles tensing as he tightens his grip around you, his own face buried in your hair.
The room continues to shake and fall apart in the aftermath of the blast, dust and ash rising in clouds. But you can’t see any of it, Dean's body is shielding you from the room as it crumbles around the two of you, tucking you further beneath him the longer it goes on, making it impossible for anyone or anything to hurt you.
You could feel something curling in the pit of your stomach the longer you laid there under him, an odd feeling that you'd tried to push down whenever you were around Dean, a warmth that begins to spread like wildfire through your body everywhere the two of you are touching. His body is warm and heavy, but it's not oppressive, it lays over you protective and unyielding in the wake of the destruction.
The smell of him invades your senses, a mix of gunmetal, leather, and a spicy scent that tickled your nose. You'd smelled Dean's shampoo before, when it wafted out of the bathroom as you walked down the hallway, imprinting itself in your mind. It was how the impala smelled, always like Dean, and with it brought a feeling of comfort that you'd never known before.
It was odd.
"Are you okay?" Dean whispers, and you can feel the rumble of his words through his chest where it's touching you, his hips laying in the cradle of your thighs. He pulls back to look at your face, the rough grate of his stubble catching your chin as he does so. His eyes are wide with worry and it's the first time that you'd ever seen him look at you that way.
Dust and ash caught in his hair in graying clumps, sticking to the shortened brownish gold strands, the ones that were just a little shorter than Ben's. You longed to run your fingers through, to feel if it was as soft as it looked.
"I think so." You murmur, not used to the weight of his body on top of yours, but you're also trying not to notice how a part of you liked it. "Are you okay?" Your fingertips trail against the smooth leather of his jacket, working up to the back of his head, feeling just the subtle brush of the hair at the nape of his neck.
You don't miss the soft sigh that rushes out of Dean's chest when you do that, fueling the fire that was spreading in the pit of your stomach.
What is happening?
"Yeah." Dean's fingers brush your hair from your face, so quickly that you think you missed it, but the burn of his skin over your cheeks is the only reminder. You gasp softly with the movement, confused as to why Dean was acting this way, why he was worried about you, and why you liked it. Your arms are still wrapped around his body, fingers curled into the back of his leather jacket, but Dean makes no move to get up, he continues to look at you.
You'd never seen Dean look at you like that, look at you as if he wished to understand you, as if he saw you. No one had ever looked at you that way in your entire life.
"Dean!" You hear Sam yell from somewhere, followed by your own name.
It jolts Dean out of wherever his mind is and he gets off of you, but he helps you to your feet, one of his warm calloused hands taking yours to pull you up before dropping it as if he didn't do it in the first place.
The room is destroyed. The roof has completely caved in allowing the rain to soak through the remaining seats of the auditorium and into the musty carpets. The stage no longer exists, all that remains is a black blob of what you're sure used to be Iris, and although a part of you feels bad about the turn of events, you can't help but feel a little relieved.
She was going to kill me. You think to avoid the wave of guilt that washes over you.
"Ding dong the witch is dead." Dean mutters under his breath, but it doesn't make you feel better.
Fires burn over the edges of the stage, small and controlled, but sending rivulets of smoke into the air. You knew it meant that the fire department would be here any minute and that's the last thing you wanted to explain. That and the body on the stage.
Ben stumbles to his feet a few steps away from Dean and you, pushing off a piece of roofing that must have landed on top of him. His suit is covered in dust and drywall, but he looks okay. He's got that far-away look in his eye he always does after he uses his power.
You step towards him to make sure he's okay, but Dean stands in your way.
"Are you out of your mind?" Dean snarls at Ben.
"What the fuck is your problem?" Ben snaps.
"You almost killed us! Almost killed her!" Dean gestures towards you.
"I fixed the problem." Ben rolls his eyes and glances to you, as if trying to reassure himself that you're okay. You knew that Ben might have wanted to only have a physical relationship with you, but you knew that he did care about you in his own way. "You okay sweetheart?" He pushes past Dean, gently touching your face, tilting it up to his. "Did you hit your head?"
"No. I'm okay." You smile tightly at him, but a part of you can still feel the ghost of Dean's fingertips trailing against your cheeks to push away your hair and feel the weight of his body over yours. "Are you okay?" You ask, noting the way his eyes still are a little unfocused.
"Course I am." Ben scoffs. "Takes a little more than a building to bring me down doll."
You nod, while Ben's hand still continues to rest on your chin, and just as he leans down for a kiss, you see Dean's face in the corner of your eye and finally you're able to identify the emotion reflected in his gaze. It's the same emotion that you saw in the car when he stared at you in the rearview mirror. It's the first time that you've ever seen Dean look at you that way in all the years you'd known him.
It's hurt that flashes behind the green eyes you knew so well, shifting to jealousy on around the darkened edges the longer he looks at Ben and you.
And when Ben's lips touch yours, you feel guilt begin to creep along your skin and extinguish the sparks you'd felt moments ago in the pit of your stomach.
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/d565fe329fad53251da69f2110204a3a/c48299a0cad2569a-78/s540x810/b241dfe82f48198f046888950f93bd2011f9996a.jpg)
A/N: I'm not going to lie, I did not mean for this part to be a little sad... but oh my word 😭 BUT I also promise that the next chapter will have a happy ending ❤️
Thank you so much for reading! Likes, Reblogs, and Comments are not required, but are always appreciated. I love hearing what y'all think! If you'd like to be added to the taglist for Part 3 please let me know!
Taglist:
@roseblue373 @mrsjenniferwinchester @livya99 @zepskies
@winchesterwild78 @ladykitana90 @spnfamily-j2 @whyyouegg
@suckitands33 @pizzagirlxnsfwx @s0uz4s @schinug @just-levyy
@xx-spooky-little-vampire-xx @minas-fantasies @ladysparkles78
@mochminnie @peachhiz @impala67stellawinchester @nancymcl @lunaleah
@lightdancingwords @kamisobsessed @justwhisperingfantasies
@lunaleah @kamisobsessed @kmc1989 @djudy99
@bitchykittenconnoisseur
#it is a big deal#spn#supernatural#dean winchester x reader#dean winchester x you#dean winchester x female!reader#dean winchester#soldier boy x reader#soldier boy x you#soldier boy#jensen ackles#jackles#jensen ackles x reader#dean winchester fic#dean x you#dean winchester fanfiction#dean x reader#spn x reader#spn x you#supernatural fanfiction#supernatural fandom#soldier boy x female reader#supernatural fic#soldier boy fanfiction#soldier boy/ben#Hello My Friend! 💗
328 notes
·
View notes
Note
If you were to have cosplay sex with your idol girlfriend, which idol would you think would look best in the following costumes?
Police
Student
Professor
Witch
Superhero
Cheerleader
Princess
Comics, game characters
Bikini
Nude
For the sake of not being too boring and answering 'Taeyeon' for all of them, imma try to diversify a bit here (although I may still end up going with Taeyeon for more than one :p) Also, this is more gonna be of a 'who I think of first for __' or 'who do I think suits a __ kind of look the best' :D
Police
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/5b82b327a02e03e61bd6a4f0f9a7ca71/2e11df80959a5bb2-cf/s540x810/192cfc857548e181e45cd82f87b98bece987fad0.webp)
I think this one is pretty easy since IU, I think, is (or was) an honorary police officer
2. Student Sana seems like she'd be a delight to teach. What a cutie pie
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/dd3024b9d393522f3b108e66c5aa041c/2e11df80959a5bb2-6e/s250x250_c1/53a992e0130b4ca4c8708998c5b16ea76f1310f0.jpg)
Look at her.
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/3411525a56a8da9b31fc865b8492ff5b/2e11df80959a5bb2-f0/s540x810/7ebe9ba24661a1263734e55fc31ac9f7bec1e50d.jpg)
Yep. Looking at her. Looking at her ... wait what?
Oh, also, shoutout to Taeyeon too
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/8dfbf9f7e100b4198dbe45c2a2cdd322/2e11df80959a5bb2-8f/s540x810/5adaa80a721519e2981cc849de6e4e16378ec127.jpg)
And ofc her in her 'Letter to Myself' MV and photoshoot/jacket shoot/whatever they're called
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/9cec80f1e783ac66dc900f6283925d35/2e11df80959a5bb2-12/s540x810/d16c3b19eddbade021e5c29cbc534bca3f3cb9d2.jpg)
(how to be that cushion, anyone know?)
3. Professor Speaking of Taeyeon (sorry, but you asked me, the Taeyeon-biased guy, so you should've figured that I'd answer Taeyeon for a few of these, even if I said I'd try not to at the beginning of this post)
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/8ca488e441094dde9127ab05433727a2/2e11df80959a5bb2-61/s540x810/2efed078474c6aded4e8119c43d6c22a0a3ab054.jpg)
Yep.
Yep yep. Help, my mind is going fried with all sorts of ideas of principal/professor Taeyeon ... I can't start any more drafts than I already have...
4. Witch First thing that comes to mind for 'witch': Red Velvet. Probably influence of 'Really Bad Boy' and/or 'Peekaboo' or something. Of those, I feel like Irene would suit the 'witch' vibes
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/9072044f5701ea1ab9112513b264d72c/2e11df80959a5bb2-74/s540x810/98b150a41469af7bcb55719518fb39b4d512161a.jpg)
(this was the closest thing I could find to 'Witch Irene' LMAO) (Irene didn't really look like a witch in RBB, really, so ... yeah. Lemme konw if you got something better and I'll update this :D)
5. Superhero
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/3a5647714025d32831cb45e70c475b0a/2e11df80959a5bb2-49/s540x810/36e3908b2f26585dd7e1d59f57eaeef46aa52350.jpg)
First thing I thought of for 'Superhero' is Super Yuppers from Chocome, and Yeoreum is my fav amongst them, so it's Yorm :D (also, have a yorm draft, but unsure when it's gonna come out)
6. Cheerleader
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/2c9de162dd4315d377a1cfd0591d2946/2e11df80959a5bb2-8c/s540x810/f88a1233f480b17a8da26c1a992bd6526648a8b9.webp)
Somehow, first thing I thought of was this outfit from Amazing Saturday and not SNSD's cheerleader outfits from 'Oh!' Speaking of that, though, Tiffany looked the best in their cheerleader outfits for 'Oh!' imo
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/bfdcba42dc1225b7ddb022df5212a299/2e11df80959a5bb2-9f/s540x810/81dc854ccee6a90c92368cf0cde51a88a955bf3c.jpg)
7. Princess First person I thought of for this one is Yuna
idk why tbh, I just feel like Yuna fits the 'princess' vibe the best, you know? And this is coming from someone who barely knows ITZY, really. Perhaps that's just the power of Yuna...
8. Comics, game characters For this one, I figure I should choose someone who is also known for good acting, and I think Seohyun has been praised for her acting before. Also, here's her as Maelficent:
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/9970c487c6ff020b09cb87994312efeb/2e11df80959a5bb2-80/s540x810/fff9b04d5da482ac98f61c5a95e5c0301ded2f7b.jpg)
and her as a cute vampire:
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/63f9ec14614ed35ee921c7a2c34b1ba5/2e11df80959a5bb2-33/s540x810/3cb610bd460e9fba9b0f19c69a44dcc78e33adbb.jpg)
(IU was chosen for the police officer one, which is why I didn't choose her for this one) (Also, I still have yet to watch anything SNSD has acted in, or any kdrama that isn't 'Goblin', for that matter xD) Don't let those outfits deceive you, she got the body to pull off curvier characters too...
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/9a25a0fdecf2958e6434aea9e81b8422/2e11df80959a5bb2-7e/s540x810/24539b68dfbc5e0d2fc4fe08675f87e5c44af216.jpg)
9. Bikini As you may have surmised, I tend to follow the SM girl groups quite a bit, and there's no other real rhyme of reason behind any of the other groups I pay attention to. So, on that note:
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/94ad54a04a3ed002c5d70c17ff17cfd1/2e11df80959a5bb2-20/s540x810/677b060711a5dae48ef8e84a2fb0a0995dffa288.jpg)
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/52c8a203091b370878599affd5428f5a/2e11df80959a5bb2-c4/s540x810/c1d5130d9bcb2b3101ed3b603765d65cad446457.jpg)
And then, obviously...
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/ff7609f5985de78250c7b211728fbefc/2e11df80959a5bb2-17/s540x810/b1448f781f4a15326b292981c151d8ef243f108d.webp)
Yeah, nuff said, really.
10. Nude So ... uh, not sure what kinda, like, outfit or cosplay or something 'nude' is, I'm guessing this is more or less 'who do you think looks best nude' or something?
One answer:
Not biased at all
Not in the slightest
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/4e877b00457d201e2f2bb07ffa876852/2e11df80959a5bb2-36/s540x810/cab529a8ee276cf982ce4e609985eeded97499dd.jpg)
...Yeah...
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/ddd1eea49ce58917e00ac2b366c63da1/2e11df80959a5bb2-c4/s540x810/ba663cd2ddef2c084f309c2ad915dbadcb081344.jpg)
(btw holy FK this pose...)
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/b59a32b1d3d3cb0bf3171db3b7c2a31c/2e11df80959a5bb2-6f/s400x600/6bfa8e47cfb308f43f75d147bcfe92468b0ada9e.jpg)
Also have some cute Taeyeon (that's still showing off her assets) :D
And who can forgot this legendary outfit
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/f46dbba28a45121733f855563c425f13/2e11df80959a5bb2-dd/s640x960/2c1ee6fbdcb9445c3be545ae3ba380530acf51d9.jpg)
Not me, that's who. AND ALSO, Taeyeon showing off her ass for no reason:
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/03f1b8bf430da6aa452cd78e5ec16dee/2e11df80959a5bb2-e8/s540x810/4c2e6f7231a9b1081c0d226fdca6d4818504f780.jpg)
And some candids of that LV outfit
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/4b99bbdfa16485492d560b20646fb99c/2e11df80959a5bb2-e8/s540x810/1c1d18f08bfb483cd161fe1ace87082ee6bed98c.jpg)
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/3893ced95e9b3df0a7e4840bb8009453/2e11df80959a5bb2-cc/s540x810/489f1a58cda39e1c36514a15ccfe6dd4694df22c.jpg)
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/dd2fa455c7fbbfb78e81733038baef50/2e11df80959a5bb2-07/s540x810/d8ba71899c45d1e547079899454432441d834361.jpg)
Those lil slits on the slide, perfect for sliding your hands in and grabbing a handful of them titties
And,
STEP ON ME MOMMY
Ahem, sorry about that.
Yeah. Not biased btw.
:)
35 notes
·
View notes
Note
btw that yuumei-art using ai thing is fake. yuumei has their own tumblr blog and they made a post about it which would be nice if you checked it out instead of keeping the fishing-for-engagement/hate post :')
Thank you for the information! I’m not 100% familiar with them, so I didn’t think to fact check. That’s my bad
#voidsnarrator#answered#once more thanks for the correction#very scummy that people are doing that sort of thing#which i will now be more careful about in the future#tbh i probably should have figured this was a thing
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/656ad5850f81d0baedf602491768ca3c/f735ffd6edfc8e4b-35/s1280x1920/04c8e9e9967d1a5e0309a62684d80d1ed1eb6660.jpg)
so ive been playing morimens lately
#morimens#funny thing is like based off the event this guys a pretty important antagonistic figure#which i probably should have met him at some point in the campaign first#oopsie daisy#tbh I only recognized two characters in the event lol#still this is a v fun game#music is good#aesthetics r GREAT#the translation is mostly good#they mess up pronouns a lot so now Id like to believe just every character is gender fluid lol#esp Jenkins#every other line was swapping pronouns#that kid is Totes genderfluid
17 notes
·
View notes
Text
much love to the (multiple) mutuals i’ve seen agony posting on this fine new year’s day my heart is with you all in spirit 🎉🎉 the pain is incredible but this too will change
#i think i got through all my own angst after having a full on melt down spiraling panic attack and hiding in my room for approximately#92% of christmas day 👍#sucked ass btw. do not recommend#i hate this time of year and all these (northern hemisphere) winter holidays in particular#because it always feels like there’s So Many expectations to Be Happy!! Love Your Family!!! Become A Fresh New You!!!!!#which ime never fucking works. sorry for being a bitch but the harder you push me to get into#The Christmas Spirit the grouchier and more depressed i get#you don’t have to change everything Right Now. you don’t have to fix yourself by the end of january#you have a lifetime to figure that shit out and it’s your goddamn right to spend that time on your own goddamn terms#i appreciate all of you 🫶#and i like having you around#sigh. 1 am somewhat incoherency pardon if i’m making little sense#i think i’m just over trying to find the One True Solution that will fix me and make me a perfect new person#that never has any conflict with anyone and never does embarrassing shit i’m ashamed of or fucks up by not being an#omniscient emotionless robot#i’ll hold onto the smaller goals if only because ‘it’s good to have things to look forward to’#etc. etc.#but. that’s it and only barely#really i just hope my birthday isn’t as utterly dogshit as last year but :]#we’ll fucking see#i should probably just block every tag i can think of related to american politics that day tbh#sigh. horrors of a january 20th birthday#anywho.#there’s my new years rant happy 2025 or whatever let’s see how long it takes me to remember to write the new date#storm tag#broadcasts from the astronaut
9 notes
·
View notes
Text
this isn’t prompted by anyone (if anything it’s prompted by me deciding not to post a specific thing I was gonna say) but it is so important in fandom spaces to remember that you do not have to share every single opinion you have publicly. especially negative ones. that sounds slightly mean and ‘ooh never hate on anything ever’ but like genuinely you can and should have certain opinions that are Just For You that you don’t share. or you can keep them within private conversations with friends if you absolutely have to talk about them. I have opinions that would absolutely get me hunted for sport by the wider fandom and guess what? I don’t share them! because I know they’ll upset people! and there’s no reason to share the things I don’t like when there’s so much that I DO like!
#no one can get upset abt your opinions of a character or storyline if you just. don’t tell them.#’hey ace why do you never post about xyz character/plotpoint—‘ bc you would not like it if I did.#this like isn’t even nnk related this is just the only fandom blog I have and also I have like. so few followers on my main#that it’s not even really worth it to make original posts there tbh#if I’m ever very dodgy and vague when you talk to me abt a certain thing. it’s probably one of my Secret Opinions#and I have yet to figure out if it’s a safe place to be a hater or if I should just not tell you
6 notes
·
View notes
Text
ive done it...
the page is listing stuff weee! now if only i could figure out how to make the names change size based on the screen size
#im using tailwind for this#which makes things much easier#but when i try to use the sm: thing for the text#it does the opposite for some reason#like ill have#ClassName=“text-base sm:text-sm”#and the text starts of small and goes to base size when the screen gets smaller...#idk why its doing that and i probably have to read the specifics of what is considered a small screen to figure out what the hell is goin o#i gotta clean this page up#make it look nicer#and list the affection lvl#tbh i need to just fix the whole site theme first to make it look nicer and then we add specific stuff to specific pages#but thats for future me to worry about lol#okay next step i should do probably is start working on a page to actually get new bfs#right now ive been manually adding them on the database for testing purposes#im done for now tho cause i wanna go play games#but good work team (me)#webdev#codeblr#artists on tumblr#ocs
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
unwell enough about the final lucanis romance scene that i DID figure out how to clip things in-game so i could have my own little recording of it with my favorite dialogue choices, tbh
#IT'S VERY GOOD#also tbh i've been thinking about the romance in general and i think i figured out what it actually needed which is like. a first kiss#gods bless the final scene BUT that kiss is clearly not their first#it's SO familiar. so when WAS the first kiss??#if that had happened on-screen at some point I think that would have been the only alternation that needed to happen really#which could have been either during the commitment scene or (more likely) the second coffee date#a lot of things in the romances (multiple of them since i've been watching some of the ones i don't intend to do myself)#are implied happening off-screen but. some things probably SHOULD be shown on-screen yk?#anyway#datv spoilers#rosie plays games kinda okay#that dragon sure does age
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
~ ~ ~
#today I am sad about something that I know objectively is dumb#my 30th birthday is next week and the party will be next Saturday and I’m having a dinner at a nice restaurant in town#I wasn’t supposed to make it to 30 and never thought I would but now somehow I have and so this birthday is like…#a really huge deal to me you know#and I always wanted to be able to have a big party to celebrate this specific occasion and in my head I pictured all my friends/family there#I figured this would be one of the biggest parties I’d ever get to throw because to me this is the biggest milestone I’ve gotten to so far#but out of all the people I’ve invited the most that will probably reasonably show is about 10#and even that’s a bit iffy because tbh I’m pretty sure my bestie will flake on me like he always does#and if he doesn’t show up that might just end the friendship but that’s another matter entirely#also iffy because I haven’t gotten a lot of responses still even though I made the event and sent invites two weeks ago#I just… thought I had more friends than that if that makes sense#like I had bigger parties with more people attending in high school and I barely had any friends then#I’ve thrown low key Halloween parties in my mom’s apartment that had more people show up#now I’m at the most important moment of my life (so far) and I’ll barely have anyone with me#lately it just feels like less and less people care about me for real despite how many I know around work or how many are on my Facebook#it feels like my world keeps shrinking and I really don’t want that because it’s been small enough as it is#I just feel like I’m never really going to find my place or have big groups of friends like everyone else#I’m never going to have a group of friends or people I can rely on to spend time with me when needed#as it is planning things gets harder the older we get anyway just due to needing to tend to adult life#guess I still just want what everyone else has and I don’t know why I can’t have those things#and I know it’s stupid and selfish and whiny but I really want to cry because I’m so depressed that I have barely anyone in my life at all#barely anyone to celebrate something so important to me and so few who even seem to care at all either#I’m grateful for everyone I do have honestly#but that doesn’t offset this weird pain in my chest over this whole situation#maybe I should just curl up and cry until this all passes and I can go back to pretending it doesn’t matter#personal
2 notes
·
View notes
Note
🎤 🎤 🎤
a song that i associate with my muse meme!
AHH, hey, ramone!! thank you for sending in this prompt :D since you sent in three of the mic's, i shall now be treating you to three songs that make me think of blamore when i hear them / that i associate with it. an explanation of why i chose them will be in the tags <3
hozier - who we are.
youtube
icehouse - crazy.
youtube
depeche mode - personal jesus.
youtube
#IT WAS PROBABLY NOTHING BUT IT FELT LIKE THE WORLD: musings.#asks - answered.#ooc post.#okay but ESPECIALLY heavy on the last one because it literally all about the idea of someone that people can turn to in hard times-#like a god or a prophet who will listen to your plights and help you + who you should believe in. and i say this because one major theme-#to blamore's character is the concept of being a false prophet and someone who essentially unfortunately takes advantage of people's-#longing for things to get better in gotham. bc i feel like a lot of people there have either been failed by the system by other's or-#possibly both and this is so that blamore can get people to voluntarily want to consume the 'seeds' it distributes in order to uhh...#well purge gotham of its undesirables basically as terrible as that sounds. but yeah that depeche mode song? it's such a good one for-#him and definitely has helped me before to write things related to him since blamore does sometimes believe in its own hubris.#but as for the second one by icehouse that one i associate with it because although it doesn't exactly consider itself to fully identify-#with the label of being a 'man' i feel as if blamore will still talk about itself that way sometimes. its relationship with its gender-#is honestly a little bit complicated NGL because him using it/its pronouns as well is something blamore adopted recently even-#though he'd always sort of felt like disconnected and/or like it didn't really align with how he saw himself completely. BUT yeahhh#i honestly could start a whole discussion about that but i shall do that another time perhaps ahah. anyhow though besides that-#elephant in the room ever since it has transformed into this half-human half-plant monster being... although it does love any partners-#it has very much (trust me) i feel like it does wonder why they chose to be with him more often than he'd like to admit.#so that's where the whole 'crazy' part comes in and as for the hozier song that song is about how you kind of have to carve through-#this 'darkness' to rediscover ourselves and who we want to be as a result of going through a rough time or just something tough in-#general and that is SO freaking fitting in my opinion for blamore because it definitely had to completely reframe the way it thought-#about itself when it transformed. and he also had to figure out what he believed in / what his values were now which can be suchhh-#a messy process TBH but this isn't the first time that blamore's had to rediscover itself as life is honestly kind of this ongoing-#process of losing yourself and trying to find yourself again you know? but yeah. i hope you enjoyed my explanation here tehe <3#and also that you enjoy the tunes!!
3 notes
·
View notes
Note
on the note of you not getting the best grade at DMing (but a good grade at friend!!!) did you ever get around to reading Kay's zero escape fic I don't even remember when I mentioned it but surely I mentioned it to you right did I :0
... also I have been getting a bad grade in getting back into playing rpgs I'm sory 😭
OH SHIT DID I...... I DONT THINK I HAVE..... i swear i remember u mentioning it to me at some point but i mustve just completely forgot after a while im so sorry;; maybe its somewhere in our dms.. ill check for it there after i wake up (< FOR REAL THIS TIME..) but maybe itd be easier if u sent it again just in case? thank u SO much for reminding me bc i would Not have remembered this myself,,
#ik theres a few things i either have yet to read or have yet to like . write down my thoughts on and i dont remember which this one was..#i have a feeling its the former bc i dont even remember anything besides the fact that its a ze fic.. 0(-(#also!! no worries abt getting a bad grade in playing rpgs KXHSKD it wouldnt be as fun if u tried to rush thru it!! play at ur own pace :3#WAIT ON THAT NOTE BEFORE I FORGET THO. do u happen to remember what part of isat ur at. either the act number or#whatever happened last or smth like that. i can probably figure out p easily based on that#(asking specifically so i know what posts i can let escape my drafts so i dont risk spoiling u on something Big)#oh ALSO also. are u open to recieving hints for things . that are both Major Important Secret Stuff and also Super Fricking Missable#hints can range from very vague to just telling u directly#the only reason im asking is bc u probably wouldnt wanna play the game twice just for This One Thing KXHSKS but also its. its so. . yeah.#oh shit i should probably ask kay that at some point too . hm.#oh and by telling u directly i mean telling u how to do the thing that does the thing not just telling u what the actual secret is#if that . made any sense#ANYWAY.#i might look thru our dms before sleeping tbh just to cnfirm its there but im gonna pass out right after either way#TY FOR THE ASK!!!!! :3#ask#mortellanarts
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
what do u meannnnnnn i'm abt to be post college graduation 🧍🏻♀️🧍🏻♀️🧍🏻♀️
#apparnelty some family friends coming to my graudation#bc ig i'm the first in the generation to graduate or whatever the fuck#and like whatever that's fine but ffs i wish they would've come to my show instead#that i co directed and literally love sos o so oso sosososoososooo much#so so so proud of that#i don't give a shit abt my graduation tbh lmfao TT#so it lowkey doesn't mean much to me that they want to come to my graduation ;-;#it would've meant so fucking much if i knew they would be able to come#and want to see that and i could like suggest hey instead come see this show LMAO#like it probably wouldn't have happened but whatever#also just like i have like no motivation and no interest in stats at this point lmfao#ALSO bc these ppl all gonna be fucking talking abotu and asking abt what i'm doing after#I DON'T KNOWWWWW what i'm fucking doingggggggg#i alr get enough talk from my mom abt how i'm not applying to enough jobs#i dont need family friends to also be asking me and my answer just being ha idk#i'm fucking staying at college tho like on campus bc i'm a fucking loser and don't want to move on#like not rly. i'm kinda trying to see it as like#the alternative would've been me at home being a loser lol#and that would've been so annoying and even if this isn't the 'right' thing to do or most traditional#at least i'm choosing to do it ig#and i get to stay in this club w my bestestestestest friends for another yr#idc if i'm like not moving on when i should LOL too bad for me that's a future problem#and also kinda figure out this weird right after college time period w my friend who i'm rooming with#ok. slay that was. acool turnaround from me lmfao just . yeah ok that's the positive side ig lmao#anyway i also dont give a shit about graduation bc i hate my university rn lmfao :) and the world is burning down#jeanne talks#i am . procrastinating#imagine knowing what the fuck i learned in this class this whole semester#ugh literally two group projects to end on and two of the most boring annoying group project experiences i've had LMAO
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
okay last post before i decide on what im going to do for the next couple hours but old lady crafting club is tomorrow and i don't have a crochet project decided on yet still fsdjkl
my options for continuing on WIPs are: dragonscale dice bag, isopod amigurumi, or a little stuffed pokeball
or if i want to start a new project instead of completing a WIP: strawberry hat i'm going to make for a friend, hand warmers/fingerless gloves, polar bear amigurumi, and idk if i have yarn for these (definitely not enough for a the second) but i also would like to make a junebug beetle amigurumi and a hood/scarf/hat combo garment thing
#i have a whole pinterest board full of ideas and i think a couple ideas in my ravelry queue but fsdjkl#these are what im feeling like making rn i think#they've got my interest at least fdsjkl#but AUGHHH its so hard to choose what to work on fsdkjl#the dice bag is going to be difficult bc i cannot remember how to do the crocodile stitch and it was hard to figure out#and the isopod is just... so difficult to work on sdjkl i have two more shell plates to do before i can work on smth a little easier w it#and the pokeball ... idk why i dont wanna work on that but i dont LMAO#i could easily frog it all the way back tbh i only put in like a half hour or smth on it so far#okay i am RAMBLING so much rn good lord sorry djskfl i'm going to draw or play stardew fdjskl#dandy.cmd#HEY i should probably make an ''off topic'' tag for stuff that is like... not directly related to selfshipping maybe LMAO#i'll implement that tomorrow perhaps fdsjkl i try not to post unrelated things too much but. sometimes a man's gotta ramble FDSJKL
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
the unaffordability of one bedroom apartments in my area is something that can be so oppressive to me personally
#when i’m actively cooking something over a fire with earbuds in i’m not interested in having a five minute conversation with you.#when there’s visible food and grease all over the countertops that DOES in fact mean the kitchen should be cleaned soon yes even if we’ve#let it get worse than this before. if you want to send a text to the house group chat about pooling money to buy a new vacuum that’s great#and you can go ahead and do that without asking me while i’m busy exactly how you should phrase said text. if you use my knives you should#fucking PUT THEM BACK (three are now missing) and preferably without bits of food stuck on them though at this point i’m not even picky.#there are youtube videos about how to wash your dishes if you really can’t figure it out yourself it’s not the kind of thing you need to ask#your female housemate how to do. just. jesus CHRIST#my food is burned and i’m in a cranky mood and i can’t fucking take this anymore#my standards of cleanliness are clearly different from everyone else’s in this house which is just not a great situation to be in#god. anyway i’ve been feeling guilty because i’m finally starting to learn how to play the guitar so i’m going to be making a fair amount#of unpleasant noise in the house this year probably but tbh they can all just learn to live with it.#i am no longer feeling particularly interested in being considerate#caseyposting
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
pain is temporary shara brainrot is eternal
#mar.txt#oc tag: shara#slowly working on a shara-centric fic.... it's going to have a lot of rambling things in parentheses bc of how they are#anyways i'm mostly joking when i call myself xyz thing's number one fan but also like. i am very much planning to save money to comm someone#for a giant plushie of them. and a figure/statue too if i'm able to comm someone for that#i can and will spend a ludicrous amount of money for merch of my faves especially when BOTH of them have little to Nothing#my dad says the plushie is a waste of money but like#it isn't to ME bc it'd make me happy and probably help me sleep and it would bring me comfort#is it not enough for something to do those things to make it have value? must it serve some other more 'important' purpose than simply#bringing me happiness?#i'm well aware that it'll be over $2000 (understandably! plushies are expensive to make by hand especially giant ones)#and i'm fine with that. i don't live on my own yet so i don't have bills to pay or anything so i figure i should treat myself with expensive#things i want while i'm still Able to#and i desperately want a plushie of shara. a shame i know nothing about plushie making so idk if what i'm envisioning is too complex or not#rather. i think it IS doable but idk if it's too complex for the person i'd like to comm to WANT to do it yknow#but tbh. i'll take whatever it is i'm able to get#anyways i got rambly in the tags again oops#i just think shara is neat and getting a giant plushie of them is a goal of mine
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
I have gorgeous yarn and I want to knit a shawl but I can't fucking figure out how to do an increase. It's impossible
#i probably shouldnt continue knitting anyway#but god i love the yarn and want to make it into a cute shawl#my hand has been giving me trouble lately though#and i still hsve a blanket to finish#unimportant#i need a shawl#but i cant fucking do an increase#i follow the instructions but then i end up with three stitched instead of two#knittinf has never been my strong suit tbh#i only know how to do one stitch#ive always had trouble figuring it out so idk if ill be able to get the increase#i should probably just finish my one-stitch blanket and not knit again#textile arts are not my thing#i also can't figure out crocheting#i can do just enough sewing to mend or hem garments#not well though#thats okay. if i had to pick one to do then id choose sewing#i have to mend and hem a lot#this went off the rails a little bit. i just wanted to complain about not being able to increase
4 notes
·
View notes