#tbh i dont have a favorite i love them all
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HOLA! ❤️ First of all, dropping some kudos because I love you and your art so much (basically my blog can be your side blog too at this point!) ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
Second, from the character ask, I'd like to know about 3,4 and 20 for both Eloise and Leo 😁
Hope you have a wonderful day/night!
HOLA MI ITALIANA FAVORITA💓 I APOLOGIZE IN ADVANCE FOR ALL OF THE YAPPING I'M ABOUT TO DO🤭 will this get you to finally visit me🥺
I'm going to answer these for Eloise SINCE I already did 3 for Leo & I have someone asking me about 4 for Leo as well🥺💓
3) What was the first thing you decided on, the character's name, appearance, personality or their role in the story?
This is a tricky answer…just bc my evil gremlin mc in the game has NOTHING to do with Eloise in my writing. I guess I would say her name? I was just thinking of what would be the most British sounding name I could think of when I started playing in December🙂↕️
But then my imagination took hold of me…I started thinking about Eloise’s backstory…and when I thought of how all of her family dynamics/how she grew up would influence her personality I started to be really dissatisfied with the game and the lack of choice we have while playing. SO I gave up on the game completely after the restricted section quest and started to use my free time to write my fic in January🥹🫶 but her backstory, personality, and role in my story are definitely the most interesting things about her to me!!
Bonus: my first ever drawings of her in January!!! Bad quality bc it’s an insta story screenshot😆💓 (I redid one for my fic🤭)
4) And reverse, which one of the four things did you struggle with the most?
Hmmmmm😭😭 I think her personality is what I struggled with the most and continue to struggle with as I write!!!! I always want her to feel like a *real* person with flaws, but ALSO convey to the reader why they should love her as much as I do. I think I’m successful bc I get comments/messages a lot from people telling me how much she resonates with them (and she’s some people’s favorite???😳💘) but I STILL CANT HELP BUT FEEL INSECURE ABOUT IT !!! It’s so hard sometimes keeping in mind how she is and how she thinks, and I never want her to be wishy-washy or doing things out of character for her. It’s a fun challenge but a challenge😭💓 (also her appearance changes like crazy in my art but whatever I’m learning😆)
20) bonus: share any additional thoughts, art, favorite scenes, anything you’ve been waiting for a chance to ramble about.
DES YOU REALLY WANTED ME TO YAP WHEN YOU SENT THIS MESSAGE😆😆😆😆😆
I really, REALLY want to yap about the foreshadowing and scenes I’m working towards in my fic BUT IVE ONLY TALKED TO LIKE ONE OR TWO PEOPLR ABOUT MY PLANS ( @choccy-milky & @kay9leo 🤭🤭) AND I DONT WANT TO SPOIL ANYTHING EVEN THOUGH I DONT HAVE MANY READERS😆😆😆😆😆😆😆 maybe in the future…
This is me redrawing the chess scene from my fic bc I’m really dissatisfied with how Seb looks in the original (he’s probably my LEAST FAVORITE TO DRAW BC IT’S IMPOSSIBLE !!!!!!!)
And ummmm….hmmm Eloise is DEFINITELY not a self-insert character to me, but I DID give her aspects of myself. Things like…we have the same birthday (January 31) and eye color (dark green), and I tend to overthink a lot and can be in my own head maybe too much, but I’m ALSO a lot more assertive and gremlin than she is😆😆😆😆 I love the fact that she’s so soft and sweet💓💓💓 & I just want to wrap her up in a big hug and never let go of her🥺🤲
(Imelda is my self-insert tbh…and this moment in my fic was ME😤:
At the sight of Imelda's worried face her throat contracted - Eloise found she couldn't speak - and she burst into tears again. They were rolling, hot and salty, down her cheeks and she hid her crumpled face back into the crooks of her arms. Imelda immediately wrapped her arms around Eloise, and she melted into her friend's embrace. Hands gently stroking her hair as she cried and cried and cried, murmurs whispered in soft Spanish to the top of her head.
She was overwhelmed, desolate, lonely.
I feel really bad for Eloise at this point in her story, but I also find it really interesting to keep poking her to see when she finally snaps and decides that she NEEDS to stand up for herself and what she wants. She hasn’t quite realized that she’s the only one who’s ultimately in charge of her life & I’m really really enjoying watching her become the person she’s meant to be🥹🫶🥹🫶
#omg it’s embarrassing to talk so much😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭#but you wanted it…🤭#posting without proofreading😌😌😌😌😌😌😌😌😌😌#anyways ummmm I still have a LOT of asks to get through😆😆😆😆😆#slowly but surely!!!!!!!!#hogwarts legacy#hogwarts legacy fanart#hphl#hogwarts legacy mc#hogwarts legacy oc#eloise babbit
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take two of yesterdays little doodle, using the ref this time
#flight rising#flight rising art#flight rising gaoler#gaoler dragon#fr gaoler#hes one of my sonas 👍#yew art#dragons#its not the most splendid drawing because ive been up since pretty early in the morning#but i had fun with it and thats what matters#my passion in life is making dragons way too fluffy#still pretty scribbly but thats ok i draw for fun#im trying to expand my lair rn but im short like 85k (dies)#gotta make that in like 6 days cause i have nests incubating lol#i know eggs dont rot and you can keep them in the nest as long as you want#but i want to see my special babies as soon as i can#i love seeing the new babies its my favorite part of the game tbh#im slooowly figuring out genes and keeping them in my memory#also if anyone wants to be flight rising friends my username is yellowflowerzzz#ive only been on it a few weeks so i dont have much experience at all and im mostly fumbling around doing my daily tasks#but my lair is huge now bc when i was newer a few incredibly kind people sent me a bunch of treasure#which still makes me tear up strangers can be so so so so kind i love the world sometimes
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i think very often about that telegraph article from 2011 asking various writers if they prefer wuthering heights or jane eyre, and blake morrison said:
Asking which you prefer out of Wuthering Heights and Jane Eyre is similar to the questions, “Are you John Lennon or Paul McCartney?” and “Are you cat or dog?” The more exciting people are John Lennon, cat and Wuthering Heights. But I am Paul McCartney, dog and Jane Eyre.
#text post#charlotte bronte#emily bronte#wuthering heights#jane eyre#i think about it bc i am also mccartney dog and jane eyre#also sorry if you click on that article it is behind a paywall. it wasn't at least a few years ago when i read it#but everything gets worse#anyway lennon/cat/wuthering heights ppl have a way of scoffing at mocking us mccartney/dog/jane eyre ppl and we have had it. had it i say!#fwiw i love both lead beatles and all three bronte sisters and well... cats dont come close to being as precious as dogs to me#but i like them somewhat#jane eyre is just my favorite thing. god. i should reread it in 2024#i almost said in 2023. bruh. i still think i'm in 2022 tbh#some days i think it's still the 2010s#anyway morrison was onto smth when it comes to matching vibes of this-or-that questions
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Honestly your tags are so fun to read every time, i'm almost more excited for them than the actual post (but not entirely because your art is SO GOOD!!!! i adore it). If you don't mind me asking, what are you studying?
i am studying psychology because i refuse to see a therapist so ill figure out whats wrong with me myself !!!!!!!
#snap chats#WITH. a minor in human resources ☝️ because im evil or something#and whatever character/s i decide to fixate on for the next three years i will also psychoanalyze them I Guess. //loud coughing//#tbh i only saw a therapist to get medicine but since bloodwork is expensive without insurance i dont even do that anymore. sad !#but yeah im a certified rambler if i dont share every thought i have so people understand me as much as i want them to ill die#which is why charles xavier if youre out there you have full rights to my brain .......... //gross wink sound//#why cant telepaths be real itd make my life so much easier. i woudnt have to talk a mile a minute anymore#because i do talk very fast because growing up my mom would cut me off a lot#so now i talk fast in fear of being cut off without all my thoughts being heard. anyways.#thank you for also enjoying my art :] a sideshow to the glory that is my tags i KNOWWW but im glad my efforts are not unnoticed 😌#back to My Major tho when i was in middle school i thought i wanted to go into comic books#but then i thought id lose my love for drawing if i did it professionally so now i do it. semi professionally#on my own terms babyyyy thats right. and if im lucky i get paid to draw my faves im living the dream babes#thats why my text posts take nine years for me to type im legitimately sitting here thinking if i said everything i wanted#and if i worded it right but even then after it's up im like 'but did i word it right tho' but its like 'bro just fucking POST IT'#'ITS NOT THAT DEEP' its as my favorite professor once told me 'youre very paranoid' and he's right !!!! im very paranoid 🥰#ok im done now. see thats why i say Ok Im Done Now its a sign im forcing myself to shut UP#wait not done Almost but not quite i was rewatching 97 to Try to get caps of charles in his combat uniform#and i fear i still cackle at erik telling charles to shut up like PLEAAASSE...... i need that bit CLIPPED#it makes me giggle ... someone remind me to clip all of erik's cameos in the squirrelgirl podcast btw#ive been meaning to do that for weeks but. oops <3 i need all my grandpa's moments CATALOGUED and AT THE READY..#ok i done fr now i have class with my you're-paranoid professor in like an hour and i wanna get some work done before then#BYYYYYEEEE. FOR LIKE TWENTY MINUTES PROBABLY IDK
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#yes sorry im making you choose one#tbh i dont know which to choose off the bat i have to think about it lol i love them all. so much#my favorites xoxo#grammy museum#taylor swift#polls#taylor swift poll
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sorry ive been a negative nancy abt ranger 1 so far, dont mean to be, but man im not looking forwards to the subtle misogyny in this series
#thats not just me right…..#like its not enough to say this series is misogynistic or anything bc i dont think it is#but i remember gs especially being weird about its female characters#that game 100% expected the player to be male imo bc ben is all over the marketing even more than summer#to the point he got both specials in the anime#and in the almia shoutout they reference the male player no matter which gender you picked#blue eyes doesnt get to be as relevant as red eyes and shes devalued as a threat and shoved out pretty quickly#and just like…… the way the companion character is written….. i think they fully expected summer to be the default#in that position#bc iirc the companion is constantly held hostage and is super emotional and panicky#and implied to have a sweet little crush on you and youre so brave compared to them#which is actually pretty awesome if you play as summer and the companion is ben#but yeah. i LOVE gs dont get me wrong its my favorite but….. yeah#also i remember almias got some weird stuff too but memory is more foggy there tbh#echoed voice
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Bwoahh thank you for the lore. It’s really interesting to see the spectrum of views towards humans. Their feelings are so different yet they’re so similar (like night and day lmao) . Rip Goddess of Earth for having to deal with those two for a millennia. Love to hear more about these two <3
— Penalanon
Aaaaaahh yes!!! That's my main intention with my god ocs tbh. Two things: what is their view towards humans(A), and what governing style do they believe is most effective(B)? And I guess also to an extent, how do they feel about interplanetary relations, but that's a bit too meta 😭 I just think Luna and Sola are an interesting case study because they're so uninvolved compared to all the others. But yeah 😭 they are so similar, but ofc they'll never see it. I like to think they're both fascinated but one is like this 😍 and the other is like this 😟
But here I will give you the thoughts of some other gods regarding the two things I mentioned earlier, bcs I think it's a fun thing to play with. At some point I'll have to make a chart like the political compass one about this lol.
Earth(Eden)
A: They're creatures of the land with their own autonomy and goals
B: I will not interfere, it is also my duty to observe and come in only when really, truly needed(read: never.)
Saturn(Sabah):
A: They're like toys I can play with and manipulate.
B: Proxy wars are fun! I love anarchy and chaos! I will play to each side at will, and switch whenever it gets boring.
Neptune(Nikola):
A: They're my citizens whom I govern and watch over. I love to see their creations, its interesting to see what they come up with!
B: I am like a monarch, I can carry out my will through the people if need be but I don't micromanage them.
Uranus(Ustinya)
A: They are like my children, even if I don't understand them all the time, I still care for them and watch over them.
B: I am like a figurehead and advisor. I won't get involved too much unnecessarily, but I am honored they look to me for guidance, advice and encouragement.
There's others but these are the ones that came to mind first so :D I feel like most of them are pretty rational...and then there's Sabah 😭 I need to make more of them a bit evil I think
#theres so much meta 😭😭 that i domt even know if i wanna get into it#but i guess i like viewing them somewhat as political leaders#or in the view of politics#bcs that is what im into :)#also theyre like typical omniscient and omnipresent gods#but usually tend to have a human form in one place#people can pray to them and they might help them. depending on their ruling style#but they can also go in person#the prayer stuff is more like. pregnancy and personal matters#and going in person is more political kind of things#also there could be so much said about how they view each other#a lot dont like Eden bcs they see her as irresponsible and negligent#and she sees them as cruel overlords who over reach severely#and of course everyone just hates sabah#cause they cant rly interfere but have to watch from afar like wth is going on over there#poor Ustinya having Saturn right next to her :( considering her views#she might be my favorite dhfjgk#i love her bcs shes super cold and distant seeming like very serious and above it all#but she truly loves them just doesnt understand human things no matter how much she tries#ANYWAYS#lore stuff yeah :)#oh yeah also dw about how the other planets are habitable dhfjkgkg#they just are.#its mostly by virtue of the gods bodies being the celestial bodies#so they make it work ykno#functionally they're all just earth tbh. maybe just variances in size#i think they probably can portray things a certain way to the people like ooo heres how space works btw#<- like our science but in reality its actually just above human limits of understanding#also all the moons are helpers :) and have their own stuff going on#catie.asks.
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We're all tired of roleplaying and so many fights got shut down instead of properly resolved that it isn't sustainable anymore, but some hopeful fools (affectionate) are convinced it isn't over for some inexplicable reason.
//ahh I see
#mod rambles#i dont rp much on Boss. or at all tbh#well it was fun while it lasted!#im keeping this blog up tho bc i love Boss and you'd have to kill me before i gave them up#<- they are also my second favorite design of my ocs :]
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was tagged by @mooshkat (thank you friend!!) to list 8 tv shows for my followers to get to know me better!
for someone who repeatedly watches the same shows over and over and hyperfixates on certain fandoms, you’d think this would be easy for me but …. it’s not 😂
1. 9-1-1 2. 9-1-1: Lone Star 3. Young Royals 4. The Mentalist (Patrick Jane my beloved...) 5. Broad City 6. The Good Place 7. Black Mirror 8. Disjointed
I will always be re-watching at least one of these, if not multiple (right now, it's Broad City and 9-1-1 hehe)
anyway, since I just watch the same shows over and over again, I'm excited to see what everyone else watches! @wheelsupin-five (I tried tagging two-cut-lines at first lmao) @paqerings @lilbuddie @the-likesofus @shortsighted-owl @poughkeepsies @alyxmastershipper @leslieknopeinthepit
#I feel like this is a pretty good list to describe me tbh#i watched 911 three times last year#and lone star as a whole twice but season 3 three times lmao#i watch the mentalist every year it is my favorite#my dad owns the whole series on dvd because we (me and him and my sisters) watched it all together when I was in middle school#its very nostalgic for me and i love patrick jane so fucking much#black mirror will always be a favorite. gimme that spooky shit#also the good place ugggggh i have been meaning to re-watch that one again since i've only seen the last season once#but i want to finish broad city first#i have a really bad habit of watching most of a show and then not re-watching the last season ever#probably because i don't want them to end lmao#if i don't ever finish them then they never actually end right?#except for young royals because i would watch the final scene of s2 over and over again for every waking moment of the rest of my life#anywaaaay yall dont need me going off about my favorite shows lmaooo love yall#me#tag game#MOOSH thank you so much for the tag!! <3
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Who wants to talk me down from making an oc inspired by the ringside reporter from rhythm heaven cause I sure am one hair away from staying up too late doing just that
#rat rambles#^ guy who has been desperately trying to find uploads of every minigame in japanese but has been struggling like hell#japanese ringside reporter is the only character that matters#also the english marchers dub sucks SO bad I love that game but maybe it wasnt worth bringing back /j#english see saw can stay tho I like them more than the original#also for the record the english reporter is techically just fine I just love the og sm that its all I can listen to lol#tbh I kinda wanna make a bunch of rhythm heaven inspired designs but I dont have enough clear ideas to commit#except for the reporter. Im gonna turn that guy into a fucked up cat#but the tall tappers are another one I wanna make a design based on along with that farmer dude from the second game#oh and the kick guy#and the original japanese isy favorite version for that minigame too btw by a landslide#I tend to preffer the original japanese for most minigames but its generally not by a whole lot unless its marchers or smth#ok rhythm heaven posting done back to sobbing over how close yet so far away I am from remix 10 in fever#I would also play ds but I have no money and am not gonna try playing it emulated(<- already tried (<-suffered))
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finished mario wonder it was SOOOOO good i love it to PIECES
#clai speaks#playing this i realized. i just really hated smb on ds BWJBDJFB#why did i persist so hard with that game i was not having a good time. wonder is So much better#i appreciate online kinda being an easy mode HJEBDJF i can just revive off other players instead of throwing myself at the same course--#--a bajillion times and probably dying at the same spot like i did in nsmb#6163563 courses and my favorite is still 1-2 because thats piranha plants on parade BSJHDH#ITS SOOO CUTE I LOVE THE MUSIC WONDERS SM. i listen to the piranha's song a lot just outside the game its adorable#i love how there were secrets in the overworld map too it almost felt like its own course#ily talking flowers!! idc what anyone else thinks of them they're my best friends and were never annoying to me#all the new voice actors are so good i eventually forgot luigi had a new va at all tbh#and mario sounds different but not a Bad different he's still really good#big fan of this game i hope future platformer marios are as good as this one!!! please dont go back to the nsmb style i'm begging you
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It's really weird when you know someone in a context different from how everybody else knows them so you look at them and you still kind of see that person they used to be
#this post is about the boy i dated my senior year who was so incredibly sweet tbh wouldnt be the person i am today if i hadnt met him#but he was so fucked up he had so many issues it was really hard so it didnt work out but i loved him and i think he loved me too#but hes in a moderately successful band now which i just found out about do i looked them up and theyre good#but its so weird because its like i know that when you were 17 you wanted to be an underwater welder#i helped you clean your room at your grandmas house because you were so sad you couldnt do it yourself#i ditched 5th period AP English to sit on the steps behind the auditorium and listen to you talk about whatever#you pushed me on the swings and we took the bus to the movie theater and you liked cherry wraps and you played me my favorite songs#i havent REALLY thought about that guy in years and we were only together MAYBE 6 months but its so weird what you remember about people#and especially how you remember how they made you feel because he made me feel so good like i was in control#all my previous relationships was me trying to desperately please someone who wouldnt do the same for me#and honestly a lot of my relationships since have been the same especially in college and with the one girl who honestly if she called me#today i would drop everything and go be with her again no questions because i cant get her out of my head#but stuff witj him was never ever like that it was so easy it was like breathing even though it ended messy i have 0 regrets#and its nice to know that things are going well for him because honestly he changed my life a little bit#the way i dont give a fuck now is something i learned from him#ill probably delete this later but you know
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been wanting to make a second design for my hollow knight ocs, so i got started on concepts for that. im pretty happy with inkwell but im still pretty uncertain with rock and quill - rock whether or not i want her to be a cow or hyena, and quill his colors.
[id: a drawing of my ocs, inkwell, rock, and quill. inkwell is an elf, with pointy ears and a cat-like tail. they have two pairs of horns: a small pair above their forehead, and a longer, slightly curved pair on either side of their head. the right side horn is half broken. their skin is ashen, and they have wild, light brown hair that goes to their shoulders. there are two drawings of them: one with them wearing a black sweater, purple pants, and brown boots. the other drawing is the same, except with a pink cloak with an orange underside, and fragments of horn tied to their side horns. they have empty, grayish-brown eyes, with a scar over the left one. they're standing with their right arm at their side and their left arm up, their palm upward. their name is written above them, and beside them is the text, "ashen appearance".
rock also has two drawings of her. the first is of her as an anthropomorphic cow. she's cream-colored with brown at the end of her limbs, elbows, cheeks, the top of her head, ears, and tail. there are black speckles on the top of her head and on her tail. she has big red eyes. she's wearing a light blue shirt with a yellow pinafore, which has a green heart on the pocket. she's standing with her right arm up as though waving. the second drawing is the same, except it's her as a hyena. her name is written above her, including her real name albalyn, and "cow?" and "hyena?" are written above each relevant drawing.
quill is a fluffy drake with ram-like horns, and two pairs of much smaller horns below. he has a big ridged nose-horn. he has a single large spike on his back between his shoulders, a trio of smaller ones at the base of his tail, and another trio of small ones at the end of his tail. his eyebrows are fluffy. he is dark blue, with a darker tail, limbs, and head. his face, throat, and front paws are white, and there are also large white dapples on his tail-tip. he is standing idly, facing the left. his eyes are gray. text above his head reads, "fluffy brows".
at the top of the canvas is a note that reads, "heights aren't to scale". end id]
#maekrenia#sketches#inkwell#rock#quill#elf#dragon#furry#i am genuinely SO stuck on rock. like on one hand i like cow because she looks all cute and innocent which! she is!#but it's also deceiving because she's super sassy which i like#but hyena kinda fits her colors + personality more. its more obvious but i still rlly like it#im kindaaaa leaning slightly more toward hyena tbh. i love scavenger animals#quill is mostly because i already have two black-and-white dragon ocs and i dont want them to be too similar#(he's already rlly similar to edmunathy with the dark tail oof)#but his hk colors are super basic and i dont want him to just be plain either#quill is way more blue than them tho plus his physical appearance is different enough that it shoulddd be ok#ill probably do silverwyrm aurthias and snag next. silver is gonna be kinda hard because of the whole wyrm-turned-bug god thing#but i have an idea for that.#YEAH i wanted to do this cause my hk ocs are my favorite ocs i've done but i dont rlly. have anything to draw for hk rn.#maybeee when silksong releases that'll change so uh. sorry if u followed for hk but might not see any of it for a while#so! second design it is! they'll still have their original designs but ya.
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YO DAY6 STAN HI i don’t have the energy to keep up with bands these days but they were my JAM a few years ago and they’re still in a ton of my playlists
OMG YEAAAAHH!!!
They've been my #1 since the Shoot Me era but I've been a listener since pretty much the beginning. I grew up with them and they're forever my favorite band!
#tbh i dont have thw energy to keep up with much of whats happening with them anymore and kinda stopped trying since j.ae left#i dont really care? but y.oung k is dropping another solo album soon and im stoked!!!#i listen to their music all the time aksjqjsjw perfect discography!!#their music is soooo goodddd!#ash rambles 💚#middle school ash adored them and although it's been like 8 years since they debuted i still love them#scroll down enough on my main and you'll find so much d.ay6 posting LMAO even my pfp! they're my favorite band!!#my favorite song is always and forever 121U. it's so good. a masterpiece.#top song for the past like. 3 years#anyways yeah i love d.ay6 and their music is amazing and i listen to them religiously. theyre so good. so freaking goooddd#BUT YEAAAHH HEYYY FELLOW D.AY6 STAN!! person of taste <3#answered#still my comfort band hehe! i have both entropy and moonrise sitting on my bookshelf!!#sometimes i listen to like. 2017 d.ay6 and i rediscover emotions LMAAOO i love theeemm#the vocals.. the instruments... THE TALENT... i love music so much and theyre a big part of why#i was a very hardcore stan back in the day. it's been many years and these days im just a casual enjoyer but. every now and then that#fangirl comes back ajsjajsjw thanks for the ask!!! i love their music more than anything!
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Dropped my gorgeous girl (my bike) off at the shop to get her basket installed & fix the pedals. Apparently it just needs a part replacement, so I should have her back in a few days hopefully
Stopped by the shop I wanted to go to yesterday since it wasn't far out of my way & picked up a new deck of tarot cards. As much as I love my first deck, it's a very average starter deck, & I wanted smth more personalized. So now I have one. Gonna have to break out those puppies sometime soon
#speculation nation#i also got a box for it. bc i wanted one and it wasnt that expensive.#maybe if i keep it within easy reach i'll use them more than i have been my first deck lol#now im home. sitting. contemplating doing dishes. i really do need to.#and. of course. listening to trigun ost. rn it's playing 'july city' which is one of my favorite tracks in general#knives' piano. vash's theme. Worm Attack. the sand gang track. and july city. those are my favorite tracks from the ost#oh and Luida's decision. i love that one too.#i love a lot of them tbh. hard to choose.#i.. am so very tired. i got maybe 4 hours of sleep & it was completely my fault.#spent the day dancing and reading things not suited for work. and now i am home. and i just wanna sleep lol#in a Much better state of mind than i was last monday tho i will tell U that. jesus fuckin christ lmfao#just happy sleepy rn. much better than the vibrations under my skin urging me to do bad things#stress. all stress. supposedly.#i dont rly wanna do my dishes but i really really need to. ive been putting this off for weeks now. it's not getting any easier.#but... after i sit for a bit maybe...
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I'll be honest w y'all i do not intend on catching up w yj any time soon
#i think the finale aired? i saw a tweet ab the finale#but i just. do not care i must admit#i was so excited ab this season this show was a comfort show but the aspects of the fandom ive seen lately just. not good don't vibe#i think a Lot of the s1 and waiting experience for me was fandom based so this show is very fandom oriented for me#and knowing that everyone ive seen talk ab the show on twitter is violently hating the main character that draws me to the show is. mhm#like dont get me wrong i like the girls too!! theyre all mostly pretty likable for me its just.#im at a. specific point in my transition rn where im more drawn to male characters just bc of like. where im at idk#i dont feel like i have to explain it tbh but i also do bc i have seen fans of this show get attacked for far less#but going into s2 ben was my#my main interest i guess the main focus for me and maybe that's stupid but its what it is#and so everything just being the entire fandom hating him is just. not making me wanna watch at all#like im not gonna speak on if they're justified in hating him or not bc i have no idea i havent seen it and its truly not the point#like theyre valid for hating him and im not tryna talk shit on them for it it just kinda has been so loud that im not having fun anymore#idk. idk where this is going or what the solution is like i love this show but genuinely#can not bring myself to watch bc i will not enjoy the moments my favorite character is on screen bc i will Know people r loudly anti him#so im just kinda staying away i guess#idk. i kinda want them to. kill him off so i dont have to deal w it anymore#but i also know that when they kill him off people will be loudly celebrating and maybe thats worse#idk. i think the only way for me to win here is to change how i feel ab ben and not care ab him and join the hate train but i don't want to
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