#tbf it did make me laugh. so

[scionshtola]

earlier i was like i need a light half hour show to put on while i eat breakfast. and then i put on the sopranos

[bigcats-birds-and-books]

Books of 2023. VILLAINS by V. E. Schwab.

Time for a NaNo Prep Reread! I love Victor and this vicious little family with my whole chest. This'll be my second time rereading VICIOUS, but only my first time rereading VENGEFUL.

[theirloveisgross]

.

[chisungie]

always been a big fan of tiny little shimejis but desktop mate has elysia.. how could i not give it a try🥺

[purpldawne]

actually wait that poll unlocked a fuckin memory and i feel like talking about it so‼️

( not tmi or anything but in case this gets long or you don't wanna read it im putting a page break here LMAO )

ok so on my 18th birthday, my grandparents REALLY wanted to go to dinner to celebrate. i didnt really wanna, but i got to dress up so i said fuck it. this was around when debates over trans women in sports were first brought to the mainstream ( as far i know ) right. so we're sitting there in the restaurant, im eating my cake, and my grandfather starts going off about how they're letting men compete against women and how unfair it is and shit. WHILE WE'RE CELEBRATING MY BIRTHDAY. IN FRONT OF ME. THEIR GNC GRANDCHILD. WHO REFERS TO HIMSELF WITH MASCULINE TERMS EVERY TIME YOU SEE HIM. LOUDLY. it's been two years and i STILL can't believe the audacity. like YOU invited ME out to dinner and start talking that shit?? if they weren't family and we weren't in public i would have told em to shut the fuck up

[tathrin]

Craziest thing you did in college?

I am not sure if this is a mis-aimed ask game or just a random question, but sure okay. Let's see.

Probably it's either the time that we accidentally smuggled beer into our apartment-style dorm the year we got into one of those and were super excited to have an oven (because we literally forgot that being a dry campus meant that it would not be allowed for us to have alcohol in our dorm even though we were intending to use it to bake beer bread from the recipe that the nice folks at the local medieval faire had given us).

Like we literally forgot that it counted as alcohol, because for us it was a Baking Ingredient (despite the fact that we had remembered that I, as the only over-21 in the group, would have to be the one to go and make the actual purchase! we remembered it was alcohol! we just...forgot that it would count as alcohol to the college), until we were pulling into the parking lot in front of the dorms and went "oh fuck, this is BEER! We have to smuggle this into our rooms without getting caught, don't we?"

"Well they probably won't believe us if we say we just want it for bread because who the fuck would believe a bunch of college kids who said they just wanted beer for the bread? And I'm pretty sure they wouldn't let us have beer in the dorms anyway even if they believed it was just for baking. Yeah we're gonna have to smuggle it in, shit. Okay who's got a sweatshirt or something?"

And we successfully got it into the room, and made the beer bread...and then had the rest of a six-pack left-over, so we set it on top of the fridge for later beer-bread-making purposes and forgot about it until we were literally in the middle of a room inspection and I had to ~stealthily~ sprint past the TA while they were in one of the other bedrooms and hide the fucking beer (without making any noise or otherwise being seen to act like I was hiding something!) and stand there sweating hoping the TA wasn't going to look hard enough to find it in the back of a cupboard when they got to the kitchen.

My gods it was a good thing my friends and I didn't ACTUALLY get up to Illicit Shenanigans(TM) when I was in college because we were not good at it holy fuck.

...OR it's the time that my roommate and I both dressed-up in our Twi'lek cosplay (me as Aayla, she as Darth Talon) for a documentary that one of our film student friends was making, and in the middle of the interview portion the three of us decided on a whim that it would be cool to get footage of us lightsaber fighting in the fountain nearby, and had an impromptu duel there which was definitely not legal for us to do or film because we didn't plan ahead and get any permits and they probably wouldn't have allowed us to film in the fountain anyway but we didn't think about that until it was over and the highlight was definitely the completely random luck we had of getting a lens flare off the sun at exactly the moment that one of us fake-stabbed the other with the plastic lightsabers and collapsed backwards into the fountain in the most badass-looking shot in the whole film, you're very welcome random film student.

Also you're very welcome random passerby who paused to watch the fight, but only briefly, because this was Savannah and it was not the weirdest shit that anyone had seen us fucking SCAD kids get up to that week I'm sure.

This wasn't really a crazy thing, by the standards of SCAD to be fair. It was mainly the lack of fountain-filming-permit and the absolute impromptuness of both the absolutely-not-choreographed-but-somehow-seamless-because-we-were-massive-dweebs-who-could-pull-a-lightsaber-duel-out-of-our-asses fight scene and the natural lens flare that makes that incident stick-out.

Anyway, I didn't really have any crazy college experiences. I was just a geek at art school, majoring in comic books. So everything was Very Geek to be sure, but not very "College."

I did put on my nice Ren Faire dress and go down to the dorm communal room my freshman year while I had a MASSIVE fever to participate in an overnight Hobbit/LotR Cartoon Marathon, having never actually seen the cartoons before, and very much fever-dreamed my way through it because my dumbass should 100% have been in bed instead of dressed in a medieval gown sleeping on a pillow on the floor in a big room full of a bunch of strangers.

But while that may be very much a College Student Thing To Do, I still don't think it counts as a "crazy college story" by the standards of which you were probably asking. Sorry.

[the-amber-droid-dreams]

[ID: A priest in a confession booth looking shocked]

[shikai-the-storyteller]

I get random requests to post specific clips for RA sometimes (though more often people ask "Hey do you remember when ___ happened?" or "Do you have a clip / date of ____?" and I'm always happy to help folks)

However. Every once in a while I get requests for very specific sus clips and I'm like 🤨🏳️‍🌈🫵

[nerdie-faerie]

Just had a conversation with a cat

[omgeto]

☆ WHEN YOU HAVE MAKE UP SEX — GOJO, TOJI, NANAMI

summary: you annoy your boyfriends, they annoy you, you fuck and all is well. that's the fic.

cw: afab!reader, dry humping with toji, gojo eats you out in the shower, nanami spanks you and fucks you against a wall so slay mdni. come for the smut, stay for the dialogue.

an: this was fun to write actually, I had a whole geto part written but I deleted it all so rip to that, I hope you enjoy. this is barely make up sex tbf its more, your boyfriends being bothersome and fucking you afterwards. not proofread so ignore mistakes pls

☆ GOJO

gojo satoru was an attention whore. you’ve always known that about your boyfriend – loved him for it even. the way he’d bask in the attention from you, his friends, even strangers on the street, his eyes lighting up at the mention of his name. which is you knew when you gave him the silent treatment, it annoyed him like crazy.

“baby please,” he whines, as another hour passes of you being completely silent, “i didn’t mean it.” 

you walk straight past him, trying to keep yourself busy. it was hard to ignore your boyfriend, he was just so lovable — but you had a point to prove. he was tailing behind you, not letting you out of his sight. he was like a small child, a puppy even, his lips pouty, eyes wide, begging for your attention. 

you head to the shower, since surely that's the one place you could continue your charade uninterrupted right? wrong. gojo is right there with you, simultaneously stripping down with a devious glint in his eyes. 

as soon as the shower water turns on, his hands are all over you, you’re just how he likes you — naked and wet. you try to suppress your moan, to stand your ground just a little longer, but it was getting hard with the way his fingers were separating your pussy lips. he lowers down to his knees, his hair brushing against your stomach as he tongue drags across your wet slit.

“you gonna talk to me now?” he mutters, the sound muffled as you push his head deeper into your sobbing cunt. he smirks, knowing that what he’s doing is working.

gojo’s tongue swirls across your clit, nipping at it. his hands work their way up your ass, gripping against it as he nuzzles his face further into your pussy. “f-fuck,” you sigh out, already cursing yourself from breaking your silence, but you just couldn’t help it. the feeling of him lapping at you was just too much for you to take.

“what was that baby?” he teases, looking up at you, his face drenched in both shower water and your pussy juices. your lips part slightly, the feeling of you about to cum getting overwhelmingly stronger. 

you head rests against the shower wall the water trailing down your tits, landing in gojos hair — making it easier for you to slide and tangle your hands in. he hikes one of your legs onto his shoulder, angling his tongue further into your pussy using the way you scratch and tug at his scalp to go even deeper.

you’re just about to cum, grinding yourself into his face, but just before you can — he pulls away. he stands up on his feet, giving you a peck on the lips, before exiting the shower — feeling satisfied.

“toru, i forgive you,” you call out of the shower, needing him right back in there to finish you off. you couldn’t even really remember what he did to annoy you in the first place, but you both proved your points. “you can come back now bae.”

he damn near twists his ankle running back into the shower, an eager smile on his lips as all he wanted was to hear you speak to him again — to hear you need him.

☆ TOJI

“you forgive me yet princess?” he says with a grin, pressing kisses to your neck. 

“move toji” you snip, half heartedly shrugging him off you. technically toji hadn’t necessarily done anything wrong, it was just one of those days where you were not in the mood — and toji just knew all the wrong buttons to push.

“is your period due or something?” he teases, laughing as you roll your eyes, “i could’ve got the paracetamol, all you had to do was ask?” 

“fuck off,” you retort but it had no real bite to it — you both knew that. 

“aww princess are you upset?” he continues to mock you, a prime example of toji getting on your nerves and enjoying the hell out of it.

“shut up,” you mumble, letting yourself be taken in by your boyfriend as he pulls you up onto his lap. he’s quick to rid you of your shirt, exposing your boobs, to which he grins at — amazed at the sight.

he pulls one of your tits in his mouth, sucking on it hard as his hand works on the other boob pinching at your nipples. “t-toji shit,” you gasp at the feeling of his tongue swirling against your hard nipple, his head resting on your shoulder as his mouth envelopes your tit.

you grind against his thigh, as he continues to suckle on you. his body moves with yours as your clothed cunt drives against his leg. his lips move from your tits to your mouth, pulling you into a deep kiss as his hands start to fondle your breast. 

“you really fucking yourself on my thigh, huh?” he smirks in between kisses, tugging on your tits harder, “i don’t even have to do much to get you off.”

“f-fuck,” you moan out, overwhelmed at the feeling of his hands playing your boobs and your pussy gaping trying to clench around nothing as you vigorously rub yourself against his thigh.

“y’gonna cum for me princess,” he teases, raising his leg up slightly causing more friction between your pussy and his thigh, “gonna make a mess in your panties for me?” you nod, your forehead resting against his as you moan against his lips, buckling against him as you cum. 

he gives you a final peck against your lips, satisfied in pleasing you. “you still mad?” he jokes, already knowing the answer. he lays his head on your chest, using your tits as a cushion, smiling in content as you stroke his head.

“shush,” you hum out with a smile.

“see i knew all you needed was to get your titties sucked.”

☆ NANAMI

“why are you such a slut sometimes?” nanami asks, roughly pushing you forward, your hands pressing flat against the wall. 

you had barely made it inside your house, before your husband had your dress hiked and panties off. you went out on your weekly date night, and tonight you decided just to rile your husband up a little bit more than usual. 

he spreads your legs, easily slotting in between them, freeing his dick out of his pants rubbing it against your wet folds. you liked it when he was like this. any time you had sex with him, it was great, but there were rare occasions when you just wanted him to be a bit more mean — and tonight was one of those nights.

“i’m sorry kento, i didn’t mean to,” you lie, if he could see your face he’d be able to see the pleased smile beaming off it.

“oh cut the shit,” he comments, as his dick slams into your pussy. you were soaked, watching the way he was jealous of the waiter you were ‘flirting’ with earlier, already had you feeling things, “i know what you’re up to.”

“and what is that?” you ask coyly, playing dumb — oblivious to the obvious.

“you’re trying to get me all riled up, so i can fuck your slutty little brains out, isn’t that right?” he asks, his dick hammering into you at an unforgiving pace. he was sliding in and out of easily, driving against your spot with every hit. his hands roughly grip against your hips to keep you in place. “and it’s working.”

nanami continues to drill into you, spanking your ass with hard, repetitive slaps as his hips meet yours. your mouth widens with every slap, the feeling of his large hand hitting against your ass cheeks causes you to moan loudly in pleasure.

“f-fuck kento, fuck me h-harder,” you gasp out, his hand moves from your ass coming under to flick your clit as he continues to pound into you. you were close, he could tell, but he wasn’t letting up with his relentless strokes. 

“are you sorry, baby?” he asks, his thumb still pressing on your clit, rubbing on it just as hard as he was fucking you, “tell me you’re sorry.”

“i’m sorry, i really am,” you mewl, feeling your hands slip against the wall as he drives into you hard, you body crumbling at the force.

“do you want me to cum inside this pretty pussy?” he asks already knowing the answer, his smirk growing as you nod, clearly drunk on his dick as it thrusts into you further.

“p-please, i need to cum,” you whine, practically begging as you throw your ass back on his dick, eager to cum. “let, me cum.”

“c’mon babe, cum all over my dick,” he growls in your ear, spraying your walls with his cum, grinning as you release all over him but he forces his dick back into you, plugging your pussy with both of your cum. “shit, that was great.’ 

he eventually pulls out of you, giving your ass a final slap, “y’know if you want me to fuck you like that again, you don’t have to flirt with a waiter for me to do that.”

an: so what do you think....??? dont use the dividers property of big emp

[5sospenguinqueen]

Matchmaking Brothers | Arthur Leclerc x Gasly! Reader

Summary: Having known each other since they were kids, Yn and Arthur only spent time together when their families rallied together for the sake of their older brothers. Recently, fans have noticed that they’re spending more time together than ever before. 

Warnings: None? Maybe swearing

Requested: Yes by @1800-love-me . asked for gasly reader and brothers best friend arthur. sorry but this is only a short one

Faceclaim: Madison Beer

F1 Masterlist

━━━━ ༻𖥸༺ ━━━━

yn_gasly posted a new story 

arthur_leclerc replied don’t be like that  → you know you love having me → yn_gasly you ate all my crisps, begged me to order pizza and then cried because i “let you eat all that crap”  → arthur_leclerc but did you i make you laugh? → yn_gasly at your expense, yes → arthur_leclerc you’re meaner than when we were 12 → yn_gasly and you haven’t changed 

charles_leclerc replied don’t be like that, little gasly  → you know you miss us when we’re travelling  → yn_gasly what’s there to miss? → the bickering over racing? the sweaty socks left everywhere? competing over who can eat their pasta faster?  → charles_leclerc don’t deflect. i know you miss arthur → yn_gasly now i really don’t miss you 

francisca.cgomes replied send me that pic of pierre please

alexandrasaintmleux replied i’ll buy you a big glass of wine tomorrow 

pierregasley replied i hate you → i wish i’d smothered you with a pillow when we were kids → yn_gasly i wish you’d get out of my apartment

━━━━ ༻𖥸༺ ━━━━

yn_gasly just posted

liked by jackdoohan, estebanocon and others

yn_gasly come to alpine, he said. it’ll be fun, he said. now i’m alone whilst he gets ready for quali and kiks has abandoned me also 

1,980 comments

arthur_leclerc come to ferrari, it’s more fun

→ pierregasly don’t you dare

→ alexandrasaintmleux we have leo

→ yn_gasly on my way! 

→ user1 was it leo or arthur who convinced you?

francisca.cgomes i didn’t abandon you! i had to pee! 

→ yn_gasly i was left alone! 

user2 i don’t know how any one could leave her alone when she looks that good 

pierregasly i’m sorry that i have a job?

→ yn_gasly you should be. i have to suffer every race weekend because of you 

→ user3 we all saw how tense she was during q3

→ user4 but also the way you jumped when you realised he was into q3

jackdoohan i promise i won’t let you be alone next year 

→ yn_gasly and this is why you’re my favourite alpine driver 

→ estebanocon i haven’t left yet, you know :(

→ yn_gasly you’re my second favourite, estie 

→ pierregasly pierre erasure

→ user5 oo doohan’s got moves. arthur better look out 

user6 can the test/reserve drivers of f1 fight? ‘cause yn is so fine

arthur_leclerc just posted

liked by alexandrasaintmleux, olliebearman and others

arthur_leclerc a stressful weekend that ended so well. what a special moment, couldn't be more proud 

1,699 comments

yn_gasly a huge congrats to charlie 🤍 so proud of you! i know you’ve dreamed of this day since we were kids. can’t wait to celebrate with you later 

→ charles_leclerc merci, little gasly ❤️

user7 can’t believe arthur managed to sneak in yn on a post dedicated to charles

→ user8 family friends my ass

→ user9 tbf she looked so good today 

→ user10 face card never declines liked by arthur_leclerc 

alexandrasaintmleux who’s that cutie in the last slide 

→ yn_gasly date me please

→ charles_leclerc whoa, when i said i wanted you to join the family, i didn’t mean by stealing my girlfriend 

user11 anyone else suspicious about his weekend "ending well" and then a pic of yn? 

→ yn_gasly his brother finally won monaco, babe. please go outside and touch grass. i just looked hot today 

→ user12 imagine getting called out by the queen herself

pierregasly why are you posting my sister’s cleavage, little leclerc?

→ yn_gasly why are you such an embarrassment 

→ arthur_leclerc i feel sorry for any man that dates you if he’s what they have to put up with 

→ jackdoohan i’d be happy to volunteer?

━━━━ ༻𖥸༺ ━━━━

pierregasly just posted

liked by francisca.cgomes, alpinef1team and others

pierregasly the gasly’s and the leclerc’s 

3,310 comments

charles_leclerc my favourite french family 

→ yn_gasly i thought you were your favourite french family 

→ charles_leclerc i know where you live 🔪

arthur_leclerc why does everyone else get a nice photo and i get the one where yn is trying to tackle me into the harbour?

→ pierregasly i thought it was cute! 

→ user1 and we agree. now tell us they’re dating

alexandrasaintmleux 💕

user2 you can tell yn and arthur are the little siblings ‘cause neither of them got a face shot 

→ yn_ln apparently we’re not as attractive as the others

→ arthur_leclerc i disagree 

francisca.cgomes okay but me and alex look hot

user3 love how kika and alex are counted as the gasly’s and the leclerc’s

→ yn_gasly of course they are. they’re family 

→ user4 and which one do you count as part of? 😏

user5 yn and arthur look a little closer than friends ngl 

→ user6 no because the way that they’ve been closer than the two confirmed couples 

→ user7 they’re literally clinging to each other 

━━━━ ༻𖥸༺ ━━━━

arthur_leclerc just posted

liked by scuderiaferrari, alpinef1team and others

arthur_leclerc grazie monza for some unforgettable memories 

2,009 comments

user8 if this isn’t confirmation that they’re together, i don’t know what is 

user9 she’s been converted? damn, he must be good in bed

user10 omg yn featuring in another grand prix post! 

user11 dick so good she forgot she was french

→ user12 ya’ll are unhinged but i can’t deny that this screams that they’re a couple

→ pierregasly i can’t believe i just had to read that 

charles_leclerc loving every outfit in this. nice to see all the family support 

→ pierregasly back off. she’s still my sister 

→ charles_leclerc for now 

→ user13 ???

yn_ln everyone calm down. we’re literally in the land of ferrari. it would be criminal not to support them

→ user14 but you’re french, not italian? 

→ scuderiaferrari you can’t fight the forza ferrari sempre 

pierregasly traîtresse! 

→ yn_ln well, i’m always abandoned in alpine. they treat me good in ferrari

→ alpinef1team we’re sorry. please come back to us. we’ll do better

→ francisca.cgomes please come back. i miss you yn

→ yn_ln oh yeah you all want me now

→ arthur_leclerc i’ve always wanted you

yn_gasly just posted

liked by charles_leclerc, pierregasly and others

yn_gasly okay, guys. i did wear red for him

2,910 comments

charles_leclerc and i thought it was for me :( 

user1 arthur kind of confirmed this already with his post and saying he always wanted you 

→ user2 shush, we’re getting a glimpse into their relationship. don’t ruin it

arthur_leclerc and you look amazing in it ❤️

→ yn_ln almost as good as you do 

→ charles_leclerc but no one looks as good as i do 

→ alexandrasaintmleux just let them flirt, mon amour  

user3 the height difference between them is killing me

pierregasly you better tell him to keep his hands where i can see them

→ yn_ln you were the biggest advocate for us getting together

→ charles_leclerc no, that was me

→ pierregasly yeah until i realised he would be putting his hands on my baby sister! 

jackdoohan i guess i lost 

━━━━ ༻𖥸༺ ━━━━

requests are open!

i am currently away but coming soon; mark webber smau, lewis baby angst part 2 and a franco smau

tag list

@peachiicherries @rosecentury @c-losur3 @heavy-vettel @evie-119 @raizelchrysanderoctavius @lilorose25

[cyatzura]

girl at the office laughed and commented 'oh you are wearing different shoes today' kill me they all noticed 😭🫡

staying late at the office not for workaholic reasons but because i wore my platform boots and they are so loud 😭😭 i sound like a fucking clown squeak squeak i need everyone to leave before i have to walk down the corridor one last time

[iz-star]

So, turns out that Zayne truly thinks he's good at telling jokes...

Isn't it funny how he thinks he's good at telling jokes just as Sylus thinks he's good at singing... They're both delulu and cute.

Altho tbf it seems that Zayne is aware that his jokes are so bad that end up being funny? ("A colleague in my division called himself "Happy Guy" and then called me" Happy Chief" Did my bad joke cheer you up?")

Dw Zayne, your jokes really make me laugh cause my sense of humor is seriously broken, we've been made for each other!!!

[p0orbaby]

We’ll Write History Together

summary: being in relationship with a teammate is all fun and games, until it isn’t

warnings: fluff, angst, a little suggestive. A whole lot of everything tbf

a/n: something a little longer

word count: 1.9k

-

In the bustling world of professional football, two rising stars shone brighter than most - Alessia Russo and you.

United’s decision to sign you the sent shockwaves through the footballing community. You arrived at the club with an impressive season at City under your belt. And with the intention of forming an unstoppable partnership with their star forward, the expectations were high and the spotlight burned intensely.

The two of you quickly became the keystones of the team’s success. Alessia with her strength and knack for goals, and you with your tactical brilliance and playmaking skills. On the pitch, your synergy was undeniable, each pass and assist between you a testament to the unspoken connection that seemed to blossom from each game to the next. Fans began to chant your names in unison. The media coined you signing of the season only three games in. It was then that the dynamic duo was born.

“You like her don’t you?” Maya asked one afternoon after training.

“Of course I do” you replied, “she’s my friend”

Your teammate laughed brazenly at your answer. She knew you were lying. Anyone with eyes and ears knew you were lying.

“Friends don’t look at each other the way you two do”

She left you with a pat on your back and a knowing smile as she walked away. You couldn’t deny the truth in her words. The connection between you and Alessia went beyond friendship, beyond the pitch, but you had yet to find the words to express it.

-

“Will you just shut up, Alessia?”

“Me? You’re the one who started this!” She countered.

The recovery room door slammed shut behind you. The sound echoing off the walls.

“My through ball was perfect and you know it” you seethed as you turned to point a finger at her. “If you just used your head for a change you might have gotten on the end of the damn thing”

Alessia shot back, “Oh, please! Your so-called ‘perfect’ through ball was way off target. If you could pass a ball correctly, we wouldn’t be in this mess!”

You clenched your fists, frustration mounting. “It’s like you have no vision on the field. I’m doing my best out there, but you’re always out of fucking position”

Alessia’s eyes narrowed, her voice dripping with sarcasm as she walked towards you, “Out of position? That’s rich coming from someone who can’t even trap a simple pass”

You shit back, closing the gap even further, “Well, maybe if you made a real effort to defend properly, we wouldn’t be chasing the game all the time”

“Jesus, all you think about is winning,” she snapped.

“Second in the league isn’t winning, Alessia”

Alessia’s frustration bubbled over, her voice trembling with anger. “You’re insufferable!”

“And you’re a spoiled brat”

Then it happened, with your faces inches apart and your breath dancing across the other's anger heated skin. The gap between the two of you closed, complete with the crashing of lips and the grabbing of waists.

Alessia's mouth moved against yours impatiently, while you grappled at the collar of her jersey to keep her close. She nipped and sucked and you sighed when she trailed sloppy kisses down your neck.

-

You knew it was coming. The World Cup was a welcome distraction. But the higher you climb, the harder you fall.

She’d talked to you extensively about it. Conversations between sheets. Whispered words against skin on journeys to stadiums. Even having known for so long it didn’t seem real.

Alessia was leaving United.

“Why does it feel like we’re saying goodbye?” You sniff. Her thumb coming up to wipe a stray tear from your cheek.

“We’ll see eachother in a couple of weeks”. Her fingers tracing shapes against your palm. Something that would normally make your skin light on fire, but this time did nothing to quell your upset.

“I know, it’s just… it’s hard to imagine not having you here,” you admitted, your voice trembling.

Alessia’s gaze softened, and she pulled you into a warm embrace. “You’ll have Toone, and Zel” she reassured. “You won’t even notice I’m gone”

You sniffed again, using the sleeve of your hoodie to wipe your face. God, you hated this.

“Two weeks” you reminded yourself.

“Two weeks” she repeated, “and we’ll be back together. Me and you, like it should be”

-

“Fuck, I missed you”

Your words were rushed and muffled as Alessia pulled your shirt over your head. Two weeks. Fourteen days since you’d touched her. Kissed her. Held her close.

It was torture. And you’ll have to endure it for years. The back and forth up and down the country. The unthinkable distance between your heart and hers. But for now, for the next few days, she was all yours.

Your shirt was tossed somewhere in the room. You embraced Alessia with devour born from weeks of pent up longing. The sensation of her skin against yours sent a shiver down your spine. A stark reminder of what you had been missing.

You kissed her deeply, savouring the taste of her.

“The girls- fuck” she was cut off by your nipping at her collar bones. “The girls want to meet you”

“Can you not talk about other girls when I’m about to fuck you, please?”

Your girlfriend released a breathy laugh as you lifted her and walked her over to the couch. The bed too far and you lacking the patience to get there.

Two weeks, you thought as you pulled down the cup of her bra and sucked a purple bruise into the flesh there. How would you last the foreseeable?

-

You wanted to throw up.

She was home, but not how you wanted her to be.

She was wearing different colours. Standing on opposite ends of the pitch. Worlds apart in more ways than one.

They scored first, and it stung to see her celebrate with people who weren’t you. Her joy, once so intimately shared, was now with her new teammates, not the ones who had once stood by her side.

Then, amidst the huddle of players, she caught your eye. Her cheeks flushed with the exertion of the game. For a moment, as the referee’s whistle blew, you both locked eyes, and in that exchange, you could see a flicker of the connection that had once bound you together as players. But it was fleeting, lost in the chaos of the match, and soon, you were back to being opponents on that vast, unforgiving pitch.

-

“There's been a lot of discussion about your relationship with Alessia Russo since her move to Arsenal. Do you think your personal lives might have a negative impact during any further games, especially with the Nations League qualifiers?”

You feel a rush of anger building up at the question, knowing it’s a subject you’d rather avoid. Taking a deep breath, you respond firmly, “Our personal lives are just that – personal. When we step onto the field, our focus is on the game and representing our respective teams to the best of our abilities. Any distractions off the pitch won’t affect our commitment to performing on it”

Just as you finish your response, another reporter chimes in, “But there’s no denying the crucial goal you missed in the game tonight. With England Lionesses manager, Sarina Wiegman, in the stands, do you think such moments might impact your chances of getting called up for international duty?”

Your frustration boils over. You respond with a touch of anger in your voice, “You know what? It’s easy to sit there and criticize from the sidelines, but every player has their off days. The presence of the manager is always a motivation to perform better, not a distraction. And as for whoever else is on the pitch, that is between me and them. I think we’re done here”

With that, you cut the conversation short, leaving the reporters with no room for further questions.

-

‘Strained Synergy: Rumors Swirl as Key Players' Relationship reaches Breaking Point’

You scoffed at the headline, tossing your phone onto the shag rug in the living room of Alessia's North London flat.

“Stop reading those”

You let out an exasperated sigh and glance over at Alessia, who’s sitting on the couch, an unimpressed look on her face. She’s seen these headlines and rumors many times before, and she knows they can be frustrating.

“I know, I should just ignore them,” you reply, burrowing further into the sofa cushions. “But it’s hard not to get annoyed when they twist everything out of proportion”

The blonde reaches out and gently places a hand on your shoulder. “Hey, remember what we always say? They don’t know the real us. We’re stronger than any rumor or headline”

You shrug out of her touch, “are we?” You snap.

Alessia’s eyebrows furrow in response, her own patience fraying at the edges. “Why are you getting so worked up over these headlines? It’s not the first time they’ve targeted us”

You shoot back, frustration seeping into your tone, “Because it’s relentless. They twist everything, make us out to be something we’re not. It’s exhausting”

“Then what are we, huh?” She asked, voice getting louder. “You don't talk to me, you don’t return my calls. I had to beg you for days just to get you to come down to watch the game tomorrow”

Your frustration turns to petulance, and you huff, "I’m here, aren’t I? What else do you want me to do?”

Alessia’s voice trembles, and her eyes glisten with unshed tears. “What do I want?” She pauses, her words laced with pain. “I want the person I fell in love with back”

-

Alessia’s post-match glow was something you could only strive for.

As you sat there admiring her, taking in the way she moved, the flex of her hand each time she pulled a dart from the board, how she pulled her hair from her face with each throw, you couldn’t help but wonder how you got so lucky.

“C’mere” you found yourself saying. Her eyes meeting yours under the dim lights of the bar.

Alessia’s eyes sparkled with curiosity as she set the darts aside and joined you. Your hands guided her by the waist, positioning her between your legs as you perched on a barstool.

“I said, come here”

The girl’s eyes widened with anticipation as you beckoned her closer still. This time, there was no mistaking your intent. Her body flush against yours when your lips meet.

You’d missed this. You’d missed her.

“I’m so proud of you, you know” you mumble against her mouth when you pull away.

“I know you are”

“No, I mean it” you insist. “My talented girl”. You cleared your throat as she looked down on you. Her stare making you nervous. “I think we should set things straight, at camp, I mean. I want to make things right”

Your girlfriend looked at you in confusion. Brows furrowing as she tried to understand what you were getting at.

"A few days, football, and no media," you clarified, your voice carrying the weight of your hopes. "We can regroup, start fresh, rediscover the spark that brought us together in the first place”

She wanted this as much as you did, but you knew the decision lay in her hands. The unspoken question hung in the air, waiting for her agreement.

"Camp it is," she finally said, a soft smile gracing her lips as she met your gaze. It was a simple phrase, but it carried a promise of renewal and a chance to restrengthen your bond.

You couldn't help but return her smile, your heart light with the prospect of getting a chance to be better.

Camp it is.

[blind-sheep]

As someone who spend so much time on more lgbtq+ settings on the internet, I tend to forget how much the average joe is, by norm, very heteronormative, as is society.

Like, there was this short video on youtube showing the Falin's resurrection scene and all, and some peoples did some comments about it.

As someone who do ship falin × marcille, and compared to what we see around here, that's pretty mild stuff right?

But as I keep forgetting, some people get quite mad at the simplest suggestion that gay people may exist in their little show.

Tbf, the first comment may just not be into the ship and is finding reasonings to why it doesn't work on their eyes, but they're very defensive still.

The second comment however is at quite a point of hetero delusion. Falin was about to marry Toshiro? What? It was mentioned he proposed to her, not that she had accepted and was about to marry him! But, to some people, a man liking a woman is enough for them to be already together, no matter how she feels about it, bc it's "the norm" for the boy to get with the girl. Like, he likes her, and that's all that matters so they will totally get together at the end?

Sadly, that's one of the reasons I see Laios × Marcille as a boring ship sometimes. By all means, I see why some people ship it, there is some real reasoning behind it, but I just know the biggest reasoning for most people that ship them is just "he was a boy, she was a girl, do I need to say more?" Type of mindset.

This next one just makes me laugh, it HAS to be bait:

Like, Marcille NEVERS blush around Falin AND just blushes around Laios? Fella, I don't think we watched the same anime or read the same manga, even people that don't ship them can see that they are a little gay. Or can they? (Vsauce theme starts playing~)

About their age difference and how race works in Dungeon Meshi, that's quite the big topic, not sure I want to stray too much here (there's too much text here as it is).

And about that part that says "makes me think they're all very straight": if this comment is a joke or not, this bit says a lot. Most people see the whole world like that, everyone is straight till proven other wise, and you gotta prove a LOT in media for characters to be gay, or it doesn't count. To most people, being hetero is the norm, and seeing lgbtq+ ships is very hard for most bc of this.

No one is forcing anyone to ship anything here, but lots of people really do forget being gay is even possible sometimes, and get mad at us for shipping what reflect our realities (at least in our eyes). Especially in the anime community, where the simple threat that their "waifu" may not like dudes send some fellas into a fit of rage and homophobia.

And I know, the focus of Dungeon Meshi is not romance and never was, and we can't see the story only through these lenses, I agree with that. But people will ship anything in any show, and I just used it as an example to talk about this topic. It's something that comes often to my mind and I never had the chance to talk about it till now.

Here's a little Farcille gif as a treat for those that read all this rant of mine:

( so cuute~ )

[sexiestpodcastcharacter]

Sexiest Podcast Character — Scripted Bracket — Round 5

Propaganda

Captain Isabel Lovelace (Wolf 359):

Her everything <3 But in all seriousness WHAT is more sexy than a haunted, competent, funny, cursed, vengeful, mourning, badass, doomed woman?

listen to the run and hide speech and tell me that isn't the sexiest thing you've ever heard

Hot space lady who could kill me mmm yes please!

(sort of) twice-undead space captain who wired a bomb to her heart to make sure the crew of her ship didn't kill her before her escape shuttle got working. she's funny she's a genius she knows how to use a gun and she cares very much about her crew (despite the whole bomb thing).

#LOVELACE #idk who she’s up agaunst really tbf #but she cares so SO much #she gets boiled down to ’tough scary lady hot’ a lot (which 100% agree) but #she is heartbroken about her failure to keep her crew safe #and stubbornly wants to make sure none of it is in vain #even if it kills her #HOT. ​even apart from how hot her monologues and threats to hilbert are #also her and eifel laughing and getting along when they first meet her 😭 yall #anyway. lovelace 1000%. the defense rests

Vote Lovelace cuz of the way she says "Hi honey, I'm home" to the bastard who shot her in the head, and then how she proceeds to beat him up <3 Oh. And how she twists his arm and says "good boy". Yeah.

LOVELACE SWEEP LOVELACE SWEEP GO LISTEN TO HER RUN AND HIDE SPEECH AND WEEP THAT GODDARD AERONATICS EVER KILLED HER ENTIRE CREW AND ALSO HER (she recovered) AND MADE HER THEIR ENEMY

#LOVELACE SWEEP. DO NOT FUCKING LET ME DOWN #Lovelace is so much to me #Seen some people in the notes citing the run and hide speech#Which is very good #but my personal favorite Lovelace thing is variations on a theme #The cyclical nature of trauma #The lack of trust #The fear #the sadness #‘You can never go home. You were home. And now you’re back— and you can never go back.’ #Lovelace hearing Hera say something to her and #Thinking ‘what she’s actually saying is that I’m a demon and she would be glad to kill me in a slow and horrifying manner’ #Is so #I don’t agree that Lovelace is doomed either #Like #lovelace did die. But #She got out of that pain and trauma #How do you listen to her say that she is Isabel Lovelace #That she rejects the person that pain made her to be #And say she’s doomed

captain lovelace helped 12yo me realise I like women. She’s so hot. her threatening Hilbert is the sexiest thing I’ve ever heard. isabel lovelace SWEEP

Mina Murray (Re: Dracula)

As the winner of the Dracula sexyman bracket which ran before brackets were even a huge thing on tumblr and as a podcast character sort of now that re:Dracula is a podcast I think she deserves a place in this bracket

I would kill for Mina I would die for Mina etc

Mina helped everyone kill Dracula with her reports and memorization of the train schedules!

Mina got her mind invaded in order to be used as a puppet, and she took advantage of it by uno reversing the mind link to hunt down and kill her tormentor. Twice a day she gets into a state of being buried alive to achieve it. She dreads vampirism yet she's using her vampirism to her advantage. Her man vowed to become a vampire for her. He hates vampires. Yet he will offer his throat to her only.

Mod Note: This poll is about podcast characters, please only vote and offer propaganda for the Mina Murray in Re: Dracula.