#tapping into some of these powers. these like catastrophic potential powers
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kxllerblond · 8 months ago
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My silly character thoughts before bed are that I think it's kind of funny that I sort of imply that cambions can be these catastrophic characters, these world killers and god eaters. but Clark hasn't reached that point and probably never will because he's very stable to a degree. (and also hard to rp that power level lbfr)
he's very conscious of his limits of control and there's certain parts of himself that he refuses to touch on or practice because they could be so dangerous. and I compare him a lot to David from Legion as being sort of the antithesis to him. you know David is this super powerful but unstable. kind of a wildcard.
but at some point I think that sort of controlled character that's scared of pushing limits like Clark gets to be just as dangerous as the character that just doesn't have those boundaries or can't see them or can't stop at them like David. and I think that's kind of neat to think about. it's just one giant circle of dangerous and dangerous potential, even though they're two completely different character archetypes and different in how they approach their traumas n triggers etc.
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laurarolla · 1 month ago
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Arknights dropped the "Babel" event last week and I did actually read through almost all of it (I got interrupted by something partway through the introduction of the Doctor and ended up never reading that cutscene), and it's an interesting mix of various story elements and character histories. What interests me most is our final answer to the origins of the Doctor and the precursors, as well as the purpose of Originium.
The simplest way to describe Originium, as best I can gather, is that it is a possibly primordial element that the precursors discovered/theorized contained a collective universe of consciousness, or could be used for that purpose. Civlight Eterna is an originium art that can tap into this element of Originium to connect to history, providing a potentially perfect understanding to the one using it. This power, passed through the Black Crown, is not unlike the ability of a Newtype, connecting across conciousness through time and without limitations. However, it can also create physical manifestations of power pulled from that history and those connections, as seen with Ying Xiao, Amiya's sword that was created from the memories of Chen's Chi Xiao in Chapter 8.
In an effort to either overcome or escape the threat of some unnamed malevolent force, the precursors created or modified Terra to serve as a garden of Originium, intending to create that collective consciousness for their own ends. The mastermind behind this project, as far as Oracle (the true original Doctor) and Friston have stated is Priestess, who was set up as the next big narrative mystery to solve or explain post-Victoria. The story of Babel shows a version of the Doctor struggling to deal with the moral dilemma created when living, sentient creatures were born on Terra after the start of the experiment.
Kal'tsit went on a whole personal journey to eventually come to the conclusion that the life on Terra has a right to make their own future, and that any of the intentions of the "experiment" should be abandoned. Oracle comes to the same conclusion, with dialouge options the player must specifically click on as they do when speaking for the Doctor in most parts of the story. However, some other voice inside the Doctor's head keeps pushing them to continue the mission, leading to the tragedy of Theresa's murder and Amiya's crowning. Additionally, Theresa took her last moments to destroy the Doctor's memories, an act that Oracle accepts as necessary. It's likely that only be destroying the Doctor's memories could the Doctor be free of Priestess's influence, allowing them to pursue the path that Oracle, their true self and OUR version of the Doctor, would prefer.
Other little highlights of the event for me include: Getting to see Savage in the history of Babel, the Vampire lord continuing to be a repugnant and irredeemable prick, Ascalon defeating a sociopathic enemy by overwhelming his precognition abilities, little Amiya and the Doctor riding a big animal, and Theresis just being the big old complicated walking catastrophe that he's always been.
Oh, and the chain mechanic is pretty awesome, with the EX stages really requiring you to think very carefully about how you need to deploy to actually use the chains effectively. Probably in my top 5 event mechanics in the game overall.
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dandelion-wings · 12 days ago
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PLEASE share those extraneous details you cut from the Lisa whump we need the lore/headcanons
I liked a lot of them, so, sure? XD A lot were embedded in other parts, so I'll post those parts in full with the extra/parentheticals highlighted.
First, not parentheticals, just the easiest things to chop out of a section that was already prose-heavy when I was trying to also convey urgency. Also a potential theme (learning vs. teaching) that I found interesting enough to chuck wholesale into my fic ideas document for later exploration:
"So when Alice designed her Theater, there was enough resin in it for this to revitalize? Like a tree in a Domain?" Jean asks. Even in the midst of the calm that she refuses to let become terror, Lisa feels a spark of pride. She may not be Jean's teacher in the way she is for Razor and Klee, but seeing someone untutored make connections between the information they're given and what they already know will always give her the same joy. "Yes," she says, in the same tone she would to one of those students, "very good.
and
Two years of helping seal Hermanubis, over and over, until it stopped breaking through to overwhelm Cyno and he could develop his own control. She'd done a great deal of research in those two years. Along with all the other learning she'd been doing at the Akademiya, of course. Sleeping two hours a night, working through every meal, walking about with a book in hand so as not to lose a single second in which she might be able to absorb more knowledge.... An unsustainable pace, but one she had sustained for longer than might seem humanly possible. Even then she had eventually burned out. (She sees herself in Jean, sometimes, young and determined and convinced that if she just keeps going, eventually she'll reach the breakthrough point where all the hard work at last becomes *easy*, and all that sacrifice is redeemed by what she gains.) Only after that catastrophic emotional crash had she learned the joys of relaxing, the delights of taking it slow. And the satisfaction of teaching, so much more rewarding than all that learning had ever been. The pursuit of knowledge requires constant sacrifice; *sharing* knowledge demands nothing, only doubles what is given. She had left her notes for Cyrus when she left the Akademiya, and he and Cyno far surpass her now in their expertise on this subject.
I had a whole thing going about "Vision users die young," based in part on a lore theory that I think I picked up from @chrysoula about Vision-users being (ultimately expendable) ways for Celestia to control/process elemental power, but also 50% a dig at the Genshin devs for refusing to give me any playable Beefy Grandpas or Tough Old Women. I pulled it out because all the references for it were an easy thing to rip for pacing:
Very little magic in the modern era doesn't rely on the elements. Even when scholars speak of "old techniques," they're talking about herbalism, which still involves the elemental affinities of certain plants, or tapping the leylines, which remains an occasional if dangerous recourse for those without Visions but had been much more common when Visions were much more rare. They were, before the Cataclysm. (The Akademiya quietly suppresses discussion of *why*.) But there are even older techniques from before the establishment of the Thrones, some still practiced in Liyue and Inazuma under the guise of traditional healing and martial arts, that draw on another source entirely. Her own lifeforce isn't a price Lisa *wishes* to pay. But it is one she knows how to. And it's one Celestia would always have demanded from her, anyway, for that Vision she's so ambivalent about. (People never seem to notice that they've never met a Vision-bearer who isn't *young*. Lisa has done her best to avoid exerting her power, to avoid paying that price into Celestia's coffers. She doesn't miss the irony now.)
(Jean was predestined to die young the moment her Vision appeared, but she'd been taught long before that to accept it as an honor, if in Mondstadt's defense. She would begrudge Lisa the chance to serve more than she would the risk.) (Lisa was predestined to die young the moment her Vision appeared, and she had recoiled from her fate as soon as she realized that truth. She has no desire to rush towards annihilation, even on Mondstadt's behalf.) (Practically, rationally: if they share the work,  *both* of them have a better chance.)
(I do headcanon Lisa as the oldest Mondstadt character by at least 10 years, but mid-to-late-30s is far from old, just puts her that much closer to this theoretical fate.)
and (from Lisa accepting Jean's aid, which happened after the paragraph above in 1.0--moving that to earlier in the ficlet was the other major revision between it and 1.5, and was the reason I wrote that post about twisting Lisa's arm yesterday. I couldn't make her first thought believably be "fine, I'll do this solo" without upping the stakes with something like "Klee's stuck in that," which is a method I already used in the last promptfic, and Jean volunteering way earlier was IC for Jean and fixed that neatly). This whole bit's cut material so I won't color-code here:
Finally, just a bit of speculative magical (and "we don't talk about this in front of Celestia"-themed) worldbuilding that made this paragraph way too chunky:
Sumeran seals tend to use threes (for Dendro, Electro, and Pyro, they say; not for certain trio in their past), Liyue prefers sevens (all seven elements at once grant stability; certainly, with all the adepti also in that court, it has nothing to do with two ruling gods and five generals), and Inazuma likes fives (they're far too secretive to even give their justifications, let alone the historical context behind). Khaenri'ah was emphatically locked into pairs (too gnostic to admit the world has three parts), and Fontaine has a terrible, unstable tendency to use just one anchor-point (that Lisa hopes will change now that it's nearly wiped them out). Mondstadt doesn't have a sealing tradition in the first place as far as the Akademiya is concerned, but Lisa knows better. What else are the Four Winds?
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injureguard · 6 days ago
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Engine Repair Shop: Expert Service for Your Vehicle's Heart
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franklinautomotiveal · 4 months ago
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Common Toyota Engine Problems: How to Diagnose, Prevent, and Service Your Vehicle Efficiently
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Toyota is renowned for its reliability and longevity, but even the best-engineered vehicles can experience engine problems over time. Knowing how to diagnose, prevent, and service these issues is crucial for maintaining your vehicle's performance and extending its lifespan. This article will explore some common Toyota engine problems, how to spot them early, and the steps you can take to prevent and address them effectively.
1. Common Toyota Engine Problems
Despite Toyota's reputation for durability, there are a few common engine problems that many owners may encounter:
a. Oil Sludge Build-Up:
One of the most reported issues in some Toyota models, particularly those from the late 1990s and early 2000s, is oil sludge. This occurs when oil breaks down and turns into a thick, gel-like substance that can clog the engine. The result can be catastrophic, leading to poor engine performance or even complete engine failure.
b. Excessive Oil Consumption:
Another common issue, especially in models like the Toyota Camry and Corolla, is excessive oil consumption. This often happens when the piston rings wear out prematurely, causing oil to seep into the combustion chamber. If left unaddressed, this can lead to a reduction in engine power and, in extreme cases, engine failure.
c. Timing Belt/Chain Issues:
Toyota engines, especially those in older models, can experience timing belt or chain issues. A worn or broken timing belt/chain can cause the engine to misfire or not run at all, leading to significant repair costs if not addressed promptly.
d. Head Gasket Failure:
Head gasket failure is another issue that can affect some Toyota engines, particularly in higher-mileage vehicles. A blown head gasket can cause coolant to leak into the engine, leading to overheating, white smoke from the exhaust, and potentially severe engine damage.
2. Diagnosing Toyota Engine Problems
Early diagnosis is key to preventing small issues from turning into major problems. Here are some signs to look out for:
a. Check Engine Light:
The check engine light is your car's way of telling you something is wrong. If this light comes on, it's essential to get a diagnostic check as soon as possible. While the light doesn't always indicate a severe problem, ignoring it can lead to bigger issues down the road.
b. Unusual Noises:
Knocking, pinging, or tapping noises from the engine are often signs of underlying problems. These sounds can indicate anything from a failing timing chain to issues with the pistons or valves. If you hear any unusual noises, have your engine inspected by a professional immediately.
c. Oil Leaks:
Oil leaks are a clear sign of trouble. If you notice oil spots under your car or see blue smoke from the exhaust, it's likely that your engine is leaking oil. This can lead to oil sludge build-up or excessive oil consumption if not addressed.
d. Poor Performance:
A noticeable drop in your car's performance, such as sluggish acceleration or difficulty maintaining speed, can be a sign of engine trouble. This could be due to a variety of issues, including clogged fuel injectors, a failing turbocharger, or timing belt/chain problems.
e. Overheating:
If your engine is overheating, it's often due to a coolant leak or head gasket failure. Overheating can cause severe damage to your engine, so it's important to address the issue immediately.
3. Preventing Toyota Engine Problems
Prevention is always better than cure. Here are some steps you can take to keep your Toyota engine running smoothly:
a. Regular Oil Changes:
Changing your oil regularly is one of the simplest yet most effective ways to prevent engine problems. Use the correct type of oil for your vehicle and change it according to the manufacturer's recommendations. Regular oil changes help prevent sludge build-up and reduce the risk of excessive oil consumption.
b. Monitor Oil Levels:
Regularly check your oil levels to ensure your engine is properly lubricated. Low oil levels can lead to increased friction, causing engine components to wear out faster. If you notice your oil level dropping frequently, have your engine checked for leaks or other issues.
c. Replace Timing Belt/Chain on Schedule:
Follow the manufacturer's recommended schedule for replacing your timing belt or chain. This is usually every 60,000 to 100,000 miles, depending on your vehicle model. Replacing the timing belt/chain before it fails can save you from costly repairs.
d. Keep the Cooling System in Check:
Regularly inspect your coolant levels and the condition of your radiator and hoses. Overheating is a common cause of engine damage, so ensuring your cooling system is in good working order is crucial. Replace coolant and flush the system as recommended by the manufacturer.
e. Use Quality Parts and Fluids:
Using high-quality parts and fluids when servicing your vehicle can make a significant difference in its longevity. Cheap, low-quality parts may save you money in the short term but can lead to more frequent repairs and reduced engine life in the long run.
4. Servicing Your Toyota Engine
Regular servicing by a qualified mechanic is essential for maintaining your Toyota's engine. Here's what a typical service should include:
a. Diagnostic Check:
A comprehensive diagnostic check can identify any potential issues before they become serious. This includes checking the engine's computer for error codes, inspecting the timing belt/chain, and examining the fuel injectors and ignition system.
b. Oil and Filter Change:
As mentioned earlier, regular oil and filter changes are crucial for keeping your engine clean and well-lubricated. During a service, the mechanic will replace the oil filter and top up the oil to the correct level.
c. Spark Plug Replacement:
Spark plugs play a vital role in engine performance. Over time, they can wear out and cause misfires or reduced fuel efficiency. Replacing them at the recommended intervals can help maintain your engine's performance.
d. Cooling System Maintenance:
Your mechanic will check the coolant levels, inspect the radiator, and ensure that the cooling system is functioning correctly. This helps prevent overheating and related engine problems.
e. Comprehensive Inspection:
A thorough inspection of the engine, including checking for leaks, inspecting belts and hoses, and ensuring all components are in good working order, is a key part of regular servicing.
Conclusion
Maintaining your Toyota engine involves understanding common problems, early diagnosis, preventive measures, and regular servicing. By staying vigilant and taking proactive steps, you can keep your Toyota running smoothly for years to come, enjoying the reliability and performance that the brand is known for. Regular maintenance not only prevents costly repairs but also ensures your vehicle remains a dependable companion on the road.
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seo1718 · 4 months ago
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Transformer Trouble? Explore the Latest High-Voltage Testing Technologies
As the electrical grid continues to evolve and power systems modelling and fault analysis the demand for power grows, transformers remain a critical component of the transmission and distribution infrastructure. These crucial devices step voltages up or down to enable the efficient transport of electricity over long distances. However, the high voltages and currents that transformers handle also put them at risk of catastrophic failure if problems go undetected.
To ensure the reliable operation of transformers, engineers and utility operators must employ rigorous testing protocols. Fortunately, the field of high-voltage testing has seen significant advancements in recent years, providing asset managers with an array of sophisticated tools to assess transformer health and performance. Let's explore some of the latest high-voltage testing technologies transforming the industry.
Partial Discharge Analysis
One of the primary threats to transformer integrity is partial discharge - the localized dielectric breakdown of insulation that can ultimately lead to complete failure. Partial discharge analysis has become an indispensable diagnostic technique, allowing operators to detect these micro-discharges and pinpoint areas of degradation before major problems arise.
Advanced partial discharge test sets now utilize sensitive radio-frequency (RF) sensors and digital signal processing to provide highly detailed partial discharge profiles. By analyzing the characteristics of the partial discharge signals, technicians can determine the type, severity, and location of insulation issues within the transformer. This insight empowers asset managers to schedule targeted maintenance or replacement, saving time and money compared to reactive, catastrophic failures.
Dielectric Frequency Response Testing
Another critical aspect of transformer health is the condition of the insulating oil and paper. Over time, these materials can degrade due to thermal, electrical, and chemical stresses, compromising the dielectric strength of the transformer. Dielectric frequency response (DFR) testing offers a powerful technique to assess the dielectric properties of the insulation system.
DFR testing applies a low-voltage, wide-frequency AC signal to the transformer windings and measures the resulting current response. By analyzing the frequency-dependent behavior of the insulation, technicians can detect moisture, aging, and other insulation defects. DFR testing provides a non-invasive way to thoroughly evaluate the integrity of a transformer's insulation without the need to take the unit offline or extract oil samples.
Doble F6150 Power Factor/Tan Delta Test Set
One of the leading high-voltage test instruments is the Doble F6150 Power Factor/Tan Delta Test Set. This advanced diagnostic tool combines power factor and tan delta measurements to provide a comprehensive assessment of transformer condition. Power factor testing analyzes the dielectric losses in the insulation, while tan delta testing reveals the overall dielectric properties.
The F6150 can perform tests on a wide range of transformer components, including bushings, windings, and tap changers. Its intuitive user interface and automated test sequences make it easy for technicians to gather critical data and spot potential issues. The instrument's ability to measure at multiple voltages also enables the detection of voltage-dependent phenomena that could indicate problems.
On-Line Monitoring Systems
While periodic, off-line high-voltage testing remains essential, the industry is also embracing the benefits of continuous, on-line transformer monitoring. These advanced systems use a variety of sensors to track key parameters like dissolved gas levels, temperature, and vibration in real-time, providing early warning of developing problems.
On-line monitoring can detect issues that may be missed during intermittent testing, allowing asset managers to take proactive, condition-based maintenance actions. Some systems even incorporate predictive analytics to forecast remaining transformer life and optimize replacement planning. As the cost and complexity of these monitoring solutions have decreased, more utilities are deploying them to enhance the reliability and longevity of their transformer fleets.
Embracing the High-Voltage Testing Evolution
The reliable operation of power transformers is crucial for the stability and resilience of the electrical grid. By leveraging the latest high-voltage testing technologies, utility operators and asset managers can identify potential problems early,substation design company reduce the risk of catastrophic failures, and extend the service life of these critical components. As the industry continues to modernize, these advanced testing capabilities will be essential for meeting the growing demand for safe, dependable power.
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rvtravellife · 4 months ago
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A Warming Alternative: RV Comfort Systems Electric Furnace Upgrade Kits
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by Richard Gastmeier Running a typical forced-air furnace on LP gas is becoming more expensive because propane has skyrocketed. Instead of using portable heaters to help lower their energy costs, some RV owners are adding a supplemental heating source to an existing gas furnace for flexibility of either gas or electricity..... Option 1: Add an electric element to your existing furnace and save money using LP gas. Option 2: Adding an All-Electric RV Furnace Assessing the Potential Cost Savings - Gas Vs. Electric FAQsIs it cheaper to heat an RV with propane or electric? Can you switch an RV heater from propane to electric? What is CheapHeat RV? How can I heat my RV without propane? Option 1: Add an electric element to your existing furnace and save money using LP gas. RV Comfort Systems' solution allows users to switch between electric or gas heat with the flip of a switch, much like water heaters equipped with an electric option. The efficient CheapHeat electric add-on system allows some owners to get through the winter without refilling the propane. The savings on propane alone could eventually cover the cost of the RV Comfort Systems CheapHeat kit, especially for full-timers, depending on RV usage and other factors explained below. Critical components of the CheapHeat system include Electric heating coils and the controller. The manufacturer offers three heater ratings, so there's a good chance you can retrofit your furnace model. The heating coils' special design is very efficient, plus they are UL-listed and fully protected by a fusible link and high-temperature safety features that prevent overheating if the blower motor fails. (Top) The plenum arrives in the kit with 4-inch knockouts for the ducting Collars. (Above) The heating element has a fusible link that prevents catastrophic failure. The CheapHeat's specialized controller receives a signal from the thermostat when it's time to cycle on. The furnace's blower motor activates the heating coils and sends warm air through the existing system of ducting and registers. With the flip of a switch, you can choose between gas and electric heat. With the CheapHeat system, no cold air blows during the heat exchanger heat-up or the post-cycle cooldown. Also, the blower motor will likely last longer since exposure to the intense heat from the flue surrounding it during everyday heat cycling in the gas mode is absent. (Above, from left to right) Flexible ducting is routed from six ports on this Suburban furnace in the fifth wheel. The ducting and collars are removed from the furnace's rear panel to start the installation process. Pliers were used to fold the tabs flat on both sides of the furnace , allowing the new plenum to fit properly. You will need to consider some things when ordering the CheapHeat system. You must order the cabinet adapter to match the existing furnace brand, which can be a Suburban, Atwood, Dometic, or Furrion. The multi-tap heater coil has three heater settings. The DH50 (5,000 Watts) and DH37 (3,750 Watts) heater settings require a 50-amp shore power service for your RV. The DH18 (1,800 Watt) setting will run on a 30-amp shore power service. The manufacturer provides a chart to help you select the correct setting for your application. When RVCS tested furnace efficiencies with a Fuel Gas Analyzer, they recorded RV gas furnaces at about a 60 percent efficiency. Most RV furnace manufacturers claim them to be 80 percent efficient, but actual testing reveals that figure may be optimistic. RV furnaces experience efficiency losses, evidenced by the heat lost at the exhaust outlet. The bluing of the metal exhaust shroud indicates a temperature level where a 20 percent efficiency loss estimate may be lower than the actual loss. There is no question that the user will save money running electric heat when hooked up to unmetered power. Staying in metered electric parks can lead to savings for full-timers, depending on electricity and LP gas costs, ambient temperature, and thermostat settings. Installation of the CheapHeat system requires a good understanding of AC wiring and electrical codes. The company recommends a certified RV technician perform the retrofit. That said, check the manuals and charts to ensure you have adequate power and clearance to install the system. Option 2: Adding an All-Electric RV Furnace RV Comfort Systems also makes an all-electric RV furnace for those who don't have the clearance for the hybrid gas/electric system or compatible furnace or don't want gas in their RV. The all-electric furnace uses the same heater element and controller but comes with its own cabinet and blower motor. Also, because there is no firebox in the furnace, the blower fan is larger and runs at less than half the speed but moves more air with 80% less noise.Before working on AC wiring, unplug the RV from shore power and turn off the inverter (if equipped). Use 300V NEMA-rated wiring that meets national, state, and local codes and route low—and high-voltage wires from the shore electrical box to the CheapHeat controller box disconnect switch. Low-voltage wires connect the changeover switch, low-voltage power, and fan motor. The changeover switch comes with a 25-foot wire harness, which gives you lots of options for its location. (Above,.... Read More... Read the full article
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zenruption · 2 years ago
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4 Ways to Get Rid of Negative Thoughts: A Spiritual and Manifestation Guide
Author: Flora Martin, Content manager,  https://happylifelogic.com
The importance of positive thinking in spirituality and manifestation
Positive thinking is a powerful tool in the quest to overcome negative thoughts and foster personal growth. By consciously choosing to focus on the positive aspects of life and maintaining an optimistic outlook, we can effectively counteract the damaging effects of negative thinking. Embracing positive thinking not only helps to improve our mood and overall emotional state but also plays a crucial role in reshaping our thought patterns, enabling us to break free from the cycle of negativity that often holds us back from realizing our full potential.
In the context of spirituality and manifestation, positive thinking is essential for attracting the experiences and outcomes we desire. By aligning our thoughts and beliefs with the energy of abundance, joy, and success, we can effectively send signals to the universe that resonate with the positive aspects of life, allowing us to manifest our dreams with greater ease and efficiency. Moreover, positive thinking can strengthen our connection with our inner selves and enhance our intuition, empowering us to make decisions that are in alignment with our true purpose and highest good. By embracing positive thinking as a solution to overcome negative thoughts, we can create an environment in which personal growth and self-realization can flourish.
Recognizing and Understanding Negative Thoughts
Identifying common negative thought patterns
Identifying common negative thought patterns is essential for overcoming negativity and developing a more balanced and positive mindset. Recognizing these patterns allows us to gain awareness of our automatic thoughts, challenge their validity, and replace them with more constructive alternatives. Some common negative thought patterns include all-or-nothing thinking, overgeneralization, mental filtering, disqualifying the positive, and catastrophizing.
To identify these thought patterns, begin by closely observing your thoughts, particularly in situations that trigger negative emotions. Notice when you engage in any of these patterns, and try to assess their accuracy and helpfulness. For instance, ask yourself whether you're assuming the worst, discounting positive aspects, or jumping to conclusions without sufficient evidence. By becoming more aware of these negative thought patterns, you'll be better equipped to challenge them, shift your perspective, and ultimately adopt a more positive and empowering mindset.
The connection between negative thoughts and energy blockages in manifestation
The connection between negative thoughts and energy blockages in manifestation is significant, as our thoughts and emotions play a crucial role in shaping our reality. Manifestation is based on the principle of the Law of Attraction, which states that like attracts like. This means that when we focus on negative thoughts, we tend to attract more negative experiences, whereas focusing on positive thoughts helps us manifest positive outcomes. Negative thoughts can create energy blockages, which hinder our ability to manifest our desires effectively and create the life we want.
Energy blockages occur when our thoughts, beliefs, and emotions are not aligned with our intentions, creating resistance in our energetic field. This resistance can manifest in various forms, such as self-doubt, fear, worry, or feelings of unworthiness. These energy blockages act as barriers, preventing us from fully tapping into our manifestation potential and attracting the experiences and circumstances we desire. By recognizing and addressing the negative thought patterns that contribute to energy blockages, we can clear these obstacles and create a more conducive environment for manifestation.
Clearing energy blockages and cultivating positive thoughts are essential for successful manifestation. One effective way to shift from negative to positive thinking is through practices such as meditation, affirmations, and visualization. These techniques help us focus on our desired outcomes, train our minds to look for solutions and opportunities, and create an energetic frequency that aligns with our goals. By consciously directing our thoughts toward positivity, we can break down energy blockages, enhance our manifestation abilities, and attract the experiences and circumstances we desire into our lives.
Mindfulness and Present-Moment Awareness
The power of mindfulness in combating negative thoughts
The power of mindfulness in combating negative thoughts is immense, as it enables us to become aware of our thoughts and emotions without judgment or attachment. By cultivating a non-reactive, compassionate presence, we can observe our negative thoughts as they arise, recognize their transient nature, and allow them to pass without getting entangled in their narrative. Mindfulness promotes self-awareness and self-regulation, empowering us to choose our responses to challenging situations and emotions, rather than being controlled by them. By interrupting the cycle of rumination and negativity, mindfulness allows us to create space for positive thoughts, emotions, and experiences to flourish.
Incorporating mindfulness into our daily lives through practices such as meditation, deep breathing, and body scanning helps us develop a more balanced and resilient mindset. By consistently practicing mindfulness, we can train our brains to become more attuned to positive experiences, counteracting our natural tendency to focus on negative events. Mindfulness also fosters self-compassion, which is essential for healing and growth. When we approach ourselves with kindness and understanding, we can more effectively address the root causes of our negative thought patterns, and replace them with healthier, more constructive ways of thinking. Ultimately, the power of mindfulness lies in its ability to transform our relationship with our thoughts and emotions, enabling us to live more fully and authentically, and opening the door to greater well-being and happiness.
Techniques for grounding yourself in the present moment
Grounding techniques are essential tools for anchoring ourselves in the present moment and redirecting our attention away from negative thoughts or overwhelming emotions. One effective grounding technique is the 5-4-3-2-1 method, which involves using our senses to engage with our surroundings. Start by identifying five things you can see, four things you can touch, three things you can hear, two things you can smell, and one thing you can taste. This process refocuses your mind on the present, helping to alleviate anxiety and reduce the impact of negative thoughts.
Another powerful grounding technique is deep, mindful breathing. Focusing on your breath is a simple yet effective way to anchor yourself in the present moment. Begin by finding a comfortable position, either sitting or lying down. Close your eyes and take slow, deep breaths, inhaling through your nose and exhaling through your mouth. Pay attention to the sensation of the air entering and leaving your body, and observe the rise and fall of your chest and abdomen. If your mind begins to wander, gently bring your attention back to your breath. Practicing mindful breathing for just a few minutes each day can help calm your mind, reduce stress, and promote a greater sense of presence and awareness.
The role of meditation in cultivating a positive mindset
Meditation is a powerful practice that can play a crucial role in cultivating a positive mindset and mitigating negative thoughts. By engaging in regular meditation, individuals can develop greater self-awareness, emotional regulation, and mental clarity. As the practice encourages a non-judgmental observation of one's thoughts and emotions, it helps in understanding the nature of negative thought patterns and how to release them. Over time, meditation can help retrain the brain to focus on positive thoughts and experiences, fostering an optimistic outlook on life.
Moreover, meditation has been shown to have numerous mental health benefits, including reducing stress, anxiety, and symptoms of depression. By creating a sense of inner calm and stability, meditation allows individuals to approach life's challenges with greater resilience and equanimity. When practiced consistently, meditation can help rewire the brain to be more attuned to positive emotions, experiences, and thoughts. As a result, individuals are better equipped to manage and overcome negative thought patterns, paving the way for a more positive, fulfilling life experience.
Harnessing the Power of Positive Affirmations and Visualization
The significance of positive affirmations in replacing negative thoughts
Positive affirmations hold significant power in replacing negative thoughts and promoting a healthy, optimistic mindset. By consistently repeating uplifting and empowering statements, individuals can reprogram their subconscious mind to believe and internalize these positive messages. This practice can help counteract the detrimental effects of persistent negative thoughts and self-talk, which often contribute to feelings of doubt, low self-esteem, and self-sabotage. Through positive affirmations, individuals can cultivate a stronger sense of self-worth, confidence, and motivation to pursue their goals and aspirations.
Moreover, positive affirmations can act as a psychological anchor, allowing individuals to redirect their focus when negative thoughts arise. By consciously choosing to replace negative self-talk with affirmations, individuals are better equipped to break the cycle of rumination and negativity. This shift in mindset can lead to a more balanced emotional state and improved mental well-being. When practiced regularly, positive affirmations can transform one's outlook on life, fostering a resilient and constructive attitude that enables individuals to face challenges with confidence and optimism.
Visualization techniques for redirecting mental focus
Visualization techniques serve as powerful tools for redirecting mental focus and replacing negative thoughts with more positive and constructive imagery. By engaging the mind's eye to create vivid and detailed mental pictures of desired outcomes or experiences, individuals can shift their attention away from unproductive thoughts and channel their energy towards more beneficial mental states. Visualization allows the mind to rehearse and prepare for future situations, promoting self-assurance, motivation, and resilience. It can also help in reducing stress, anxiety, and other negative emotions, as the mind becomes immersed in the positive scenes being conjured.
Incorporating visualization techniques into daily routines can be highly beneficial in fostering a positive mindset and emotional well-being. One effective method is to find a quiet, comfortable space and take a few moments to breathe deeply, allowing the mind to become calm and focused. Next, envision a specific scenario or goal, and mentally create a vivid scene, complete with colors, sounds, smells, and feelings associated with the desired outcome. By immersing oneself fully in this mental imagery, negative thoughts can be replaced with positive, goal-oriented thinking patterns. Practicing visualization regularly not only aids in the redirection of mental focus but also strengthens the mind's ability to manifest desired outcomes and experiences.
Manifesting positive outcomes through intentional thought patterns
Manifestation is the process of intentionally creating the reality you desire through your thoughts, beliefs, and actions. It's the idea that your thoughts and emotions can influence the universe, and that by aligning them with your desires, you can attract positive outcomes into your life. One of the most powerful tools for manifestation is cultivating intentional thought patterns. By intentionally focusing on positive thoughts and beliefs, you can reprogram your subconscious mind to attract abundance, joy, and success into your life.
Intentional thought patterns involve consciously choosing your thoughts and beliefs and directing your attention towards positive outcomes. This means letting go of negative self-talk, limiting beliefs, and doubts, and replacing them with positive affirmations, visualization, and gratitude. By focusing on what you want to create, rather than what you fear or lack, you can shift your energy and attract positive outcomes into your life. When you cultivate intentional thought patterns, you become a co-creator of your reality, and can manifest the life you truly desire.
Establishing Healthy Mental Habits
Creating a "worry period" for addressing negative thoughts
Establishing a "worry period" is a useful strategy for addressing negative thoughts in a more controlled and structured manner. The idea behind this technique is to designate a specific time and place each day during which individuals can allow themselves to focus on their worries and concerns. By postponing daily worries to this scheduled time, individuals can prevent negative thoughts from intruding upon their daily lives and interrupting their peace of mind. This approach encourages individuals to separate the act of worrying from the rest of their day, allowing them to maintain greater control over their thoughts and emotions.
To create a worry period, it is essential to select a time frame early enough in the day so that it doesn't interfere with bedtime or cause anxiety before sleep. During this designated time, individuals can review a list of concerns or negative thoughts that they have compiled throughout the day. They may find that some issues no longer seem relevant or worrisome and can cross them off the list, while other concerns may still require attention. By devoting a specific window of time to addressing these thoughts, individuals can better manage their anxiety and negative emotions while cultivating a more balanced and positive mindset throughout the day. This technique allows for the acknowledgment of concerns without letting them consume one's entire day, fostering greater mental well-being and resilience.
Embracing uncertainty as a natural part of life's journey
Embracing uncertainty is an essential aspect of accepting life's natural ebb and flow. Life is full of unexpected twists and turns, and it's impossible to predict or control every outcome. Instead of resisting this inherent aspect of existence, learning to accept uncertainty as a natural part of life's journey can be transformative. By relinquishing the need for control and certainty, individuals can develop a more flexible and adaptive mindset, allowing them to better navigate life's challenges and cultivate inner peace.
To cultivate this acceptance, individuals can practice mindfulness and self-compassion when faced with uncertainty. By recognizing and acknowledging the discomfort that arises from not knowing what the future holds, they can begin to make peace with these feelings and redirect their focus to the present moment. It is essential to remember that worrying about potential outcomes will not make life more predictable or manageable. Instead, embracing the unknown and focusing on the present can lead to increased resilience, personal growth, and a deeper sense of connection with life's inherent unpredictability. By doing so, individuals can transform their relationship with uncertainty, ultimately fostering a more positive and balanced mindset.
Seeking opportunities for personal growth and development
Actively seeking opportunities for personal growth and development is a powerful way to counteract negative thoughts and foster a more positive mindset. By embracing new experiences, individuals can challenge themselves and expand their horizons, ultimately leading to increased self-awareness, confidence, and resilience. Engaging in activities that promote personal growth, such as taking up a new hobby, learning a new skill, or embarking on a transformative journey, can help replace negative thought patterns with a renewed sense of purpose, passion, and curiosity.
In addition to providing a sense of accomplishment and personal satisfaction, pursuing personal growth and development can also create a ripple effect on other aspects of one's life. As individuals explore new interests and develop new talents, they may discover newfound passions and goals, ultimately leading to a more fulfilling and purpose-driven existence. By nurturing their own growth and development, individuals can create a more positive internal narrative and attract positive experiences, further supporting the process of manifestation and spiritual wellbeing. Embracing personal growth not only empowers individuals to overcome negative thoughts but also cultivates a more open and expansive perspective, paving the way for a happier, more meaningful life.
VI. Connecting with Positive Energy and Supportive Community
Surrounding yourself with positive influences
Surrounding oneself with positive influences is a crucial step in combatting negative thoughts and fostering a healthier mindset. The company we keep has a profound impact on our emotional well-being, shaping our thoughts, beliefs, and behaviors. By cultivating relationships with individuals who embody optimism, kindness, and support, we can create a nurturing environment that fosters personal growth and happiness. Positive influences in our lives can encourage us to challenge our limiting beliefs, face our fears, and embrace our strengths, ultimately leading to a greater sense of self-worth and confidence.
In addition to the direct benefits of surrounding ourselves with positive individuals, there is also an indirect effect on our manifestation abilities. As we become more aligned with positive energy, our vibrational frequency rises, making it easier to attract the experiences and opportunities we desire. By seeking out and nurturing relationships with those who uplift and inspire us, we not only improve our own well-being but also create a ripple effect that can positively impact the lives of others. Cultivating a supportive social circle is a vital aspect of spiritual growth and manifestation, as it helps to create an environment in which we can thrive, overcome negative thought patterns, and ultimately realize our fullest potential.
Engaging in spiritual practices and group activities
Engaging in spiritual practices and group activities can provide a strong foundation for personal growth, healing, and transformation. Participating in such practices allows individuals to connect with a deeper sense of purpose and meaning, fostering a positive mindset and a greater understanding of one's place in the world. Spiritual practices such as yoga, meditation, prayer, and energy healing can help to quiet the mind, release negative thought patterns, and cultivate inner peace. As individuals explore their spirituality, they can develop a heightened sense of self-awareness, leading to increased empathy, compassion, and love for both themselves and others.
Group activities, such as spiritual workshops, retreats, or community gatherings, offer additional benefits in the form of social connection and support. By participating in group activities centered around spirituality and personal growth, individuals can build lasting connections with like-minded individuals who share similar values and aspirations. These connections can serve as a powerful support system, fostering a sense of belonging and providing encouragement during challenging times. Furthermore, group activities offer opportunities for collective growth and transformation, amplifying the positive energy and manifesting power of each individual involved. By engaging in spiritual practices and group activities, we can effectively combat negative thoughts, raise our vibration, and attract abundance into our lives.
Seeking guidance from spiritual mentors and manifestation coaches
Seeking guidance from spiritual mentors and manifestation coaches can be a powerful way to overcome negative thoughts and align oneself with a more positive mindset. Spiritual mentors and manifestation coaches offer valuable insights, tools, and techniques that can help individuals uncover the root causes of their negative thought patterns and shift their perspective to attract more positivity and abundance into their lives. These mentors and coaches often have years of experience and expertise in helping others achieve personal and spiritual growth, making them well-equipped to guide individuals along their unique journey toward a more fulfilling life.
Working with a spiritual mentor or manifestation coach provides an opportunity for personalized guidance and support, as these professionals tailor their approach to meet the individual needs and goals of their clients. They can help clients develop specific strategies and practices for overcoming negative thoughts, cultivating a positive mindset, and manifesting their desires. This may include teachings on mindfulness, meditation, visualization, affirmations, and various spiritual principles that encourage inner healing and transformation. Through their guidance, clients can gain a deeper understanding of their own thought patterns and learn to take control of their thoughts, empowering them to create a more positive reality.
Taking Solution-Oriented Actions
Implementing problem-solving techniques to overcome obstacles
Implementing problem-solving techniques is an effective way to overcome obstacles and shift away from negative thoughts. By actively seeking solutions to challenges and issues that arise, individuals can develop a more constructive mindset, focused on growth and progress rather than getting stuck in negativity. Problem-solving techniques foster resilience, adaptability, and resourcefulness, enabling individuals to navigate life's challenges with a sense of confidence and optimism. By focusing on finding solutions, people can redirect their mental energy away from negative thought patterns and toward more productive and positive outcomes.
To successfully implement problem-solving techniques, it is crucial to first identify the issue or obstacle at hand, and then brainstorm potential solutions. This process often involves breaking down the problem into smaller, manageable components and considering various options and strategies to address them. Once potential solutions have been identified, individuals can evaluate their feasibility, weigh the pros and cons, and select the most suitable approach. Throughout this process, it is essential to remain open-minded and flexible, as some solutions may require adjustments or adaptations along the way. By consistently engaging in problem-solving, individuals can develop a more empowered and positive mindset, better equipped to overcome obstacles and manifest their desires.
Cultivating a proactive mindset in pursuing personal goals
Cultivating a proactive mindset in pursuing personal goals is a powerful way to counter negative thoughts and foster a more positive outlook on life. A proactive mindset involves taking initiative, planning ahead, and actively working towards one's goals, rather than passively waiting for things to happen or dwelling on potential setbacks. By focusing on the actions and steps necessary to achieve desired outcomes, individuals can develop a greater sense of control over their lives and enhance their overall well-being. This approach not only fosters personal growth and development but also helps to build self-confidence and self-efficacy, which are essential components of a positive mindset.
To cultivate a proactive mindset, individuals can start by setting clear and achievable goals, both short-term and long-term. By breaking these goals down into smaller, actionable steps, people can create a roadmap to success, which serves as a constant reminder of their progress and keeps them motivated. It is important to regularly review and adjust these goals as needed to stay aligned with personal values and priorities. Additionally, engaging in self-reflection and self-awareness exercises can help individuals identify any limiting beliefs or negative thought patterns that may be hindering their progress. By actively addressing these obstacles and committing to continuous personal growth, individuals can develop a proactive mindset that empowers them to overcome challenges, pursue their dreams, and manifest the life they desire.
Aligning your actions with your intentions to manifest desired outcomes
Aligning your actions with your intentions is a crucial aspect of manifesting desired outcomes in your life. This alignment requires both mental and physical effort, as it involves setting clear intentions and then taking concrete steps to achieve them. When our thoughts, emotions, and actions are in harmony, we create a powerful energy that attracts opportunities and experiences that align with our goals. This process is rooted in the law of attraction, which posits that like attracts like, meaning positive thoughts and actions will bring about positive outcomes.
To align your actions with your intentions, it is essential to first clarify your goals and desires. Visualize your ideal life and consider the values, passions, and dreams that are most important to you. Once you have a clear vision, break it down into specific objectives that can be pursued through concrete actions. This might involve creating a plan, setting milestones, and establishing routines that support your intentions. Regularly evaluate your progress and adjust your actions as needed to stay on track. It is also important to cultivate a positive mindset, as this will help you maintain motivation and resilience when faced with challenges. By consciously aligning your thoughts, emotions, and actions, you can create a powerful synergy that propels you towards manifesting the life you desire.
Conclusion
The ongoing process of maintaining a positive mindset
In conclusion, maintaining a positive mindset is an ongoing process that requires dedication, self-awareness, and persistence. As you embark on this journey, remember to be patient with yourself and to recognize that setbacks are a natural part of personal growth. Continuously strive to implement the various strategies discussed, such as mindfulness, visualization, positive affirmations, and surrounding yourself with supportive influences. This consistent effort will help you build resilience, cultivate optimism, and ultimately manifest the life you desire. By embracing the power of positive thinking and proactively addressing negative thought patterns, you can transform your mindset and create a more fulfilling, harmonious life that aligns with your highest intentions.
The transformative power of positive thinking in spiritual growth and successful manifestation
The transformative power of positive thinking lies at the core of spiritual growth and successful manifestation. By recognizing and addressing negative thought patterns, embracing uncertainty, and engaging in mindfulness, meditation, and visualization practices, we open ourselves to personal development and harness the ability to manifest our desires. Surrounding ourselves with positive influences and seeking guidance from spiritual mentors reinforce this mindset, fostering an environment that encourages growth and progress. As we align our actions with our intentions and develop a proactive approach toward achieving our goals, we unlock our full potential and empower ourselves to create a life filled with abundance, harmony, and fulfillment.
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kj-1130 · 4 years ago
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Nothing For Me
Part 7
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     You and MJ’s relationship continued to grow as time went on. 
     As she started her first year of high school, you worked on yourself, wanting to be good for her.
     Overtime, you learned how to process and deal with things better. You focused on yourself and your developing relationship with MJ and needless to say, things started to look up. 
     The ‘present but not really present father’ thing didn’t affect you as much as it did, but it was still there. It was one of the only things you hadn’t fully processed and to be honest, you didn’t think you ever could. 
     Your father is there, and has been aware of presence for almost a decade. And not once has he given you any type of consolation or love like a father should. You would think after Pepper was getting more involved in his life and forcing him to clean up (most of) his act, he would open his eyes and realize that a whole human being was living with him, waiting for him to realize that they were supposed to be relying on him; not an AI built in the comfort of their room. 
     But nope. Absolutely nothing changed. If anything, things got worse. 
     He was away more often, focusing on the Avengers. Or he was with Pepper, the new love of his life. 
     You tried not to linger on the situation often, knowing it would only lead to pain in your chest. So you just stuffed it in the back of your mind, hoping one day that the pain would just lessen all together. 
     About two months ago, you and MJ had decided to make things official after going on your first date. At first you talked about how fast the two of you were going, but Michelle simply said ‘we’ll be u-haul lesbians then.’ That was the end of the conversation. 
     Currently, you and your girlfriend were facetiming. You would’ve made the trek to her house but she was about to study and you both knew that you’d distract her. Plus the two of you were due for some time away from each other considering the fact that you’re at her place almost everyday. 
     “Okay, so I found this recipe the other day and I’m just now remembering it.”
     MJ looks at you confused, “Okay?” 
     You roll your eyes playfully.
     “I wanted to try it with you. After my ban from your place has been lifted.” 
     “It’s not a ban,” she chuckled.
     “Well, it sure as hell feels like one ba-”     “Mr. Stark has arrived with a guest,” M.I.A cut you off. 
     “Who is this guest?” 
     “Secretary of State, Thaddues Ross,” the AI replied, pulling up pictures of the man. 
     “Hey M, I’m gonna call you back.”
     “Yeah, yeah,” she nods, looking a little concerned. “Take all the time you need. Let me know if everything’s okay.”
     The two of you give your goodbyes and you ask M.I.A to pull up the live footage from the conference room.
     “Perspective. The world owes the Avengers an un-payable debt. You have fought for us, protected us, risked your lives… but while a great a=many people see you as heroes, there are some who would prefer the word “vigilantes”, is what you first hear when you start watching. 
     Immediately your eyebrows furrowed in confusion. 
     “And what word would you use, Mr. Secretary?” Natasha asks.
     “How about ‘dangerous’?” he replies. “What would you call a group of US-based, enhanced individuals who routinely ignore sovereign borders and inflict their will wherever they choose and who, frankly, seem unconcerned about what they leave behind?”
     The secretary activates a screen behind him which begins to play the previous battles the Avengers and SHIELD have fought in. 
     “New York.” 
     He clicks a button, footage of chitauri, shooting guns, and Hulk smashing plays. 
     “Washington D.C”
     A new video appears, showing the insight helicarriers firing at each other with chaos following. 
     “Sokovia.” 
     The frame changes, showcasing the terrified citizens that were on the flying piece of land. 
     “Lagos.” 
     “That’s enough,” Steve interrupts. 
     Ross nods in response and begins his speech again. 
     “For the past four years, you’ve operated with unlimited power and no supervision. That’s an arrangement the governments of the world can no longer tolerate. But I think we have a solution.”
     He places a thick document on the table and slides it across to Wanda. As the team slides the book to each other Ross starts talking. 
     “The Sokovia Accords. Approved by 117 countries… it states that the Avengers shall no longer be a private organization. Instead, they’ll operate under the supervision of a United Nations panel, only when and if that panel deems it necessary.” 
     “The Avengers were formed to make the world a safer place,” the Captain begins. “I feel we’ve done that.”
     “Tell me, Captain, do you know where Thor and Banner are right now?” There was a momentary pause as the two men’s eyes met. “If I misplaced a couple of 30 megaton nukes… you can bet there’d be consequences. Compromise. Reassurance. That’s how the world works. Believe me, this is middle ground.”
     At this point, you’re walking out of your room after transfering the feed to your tablet and making your way to the elevator.
     “So, these are contingencies,” Rhodey states. 
     “Three days from now,” Secretary Ross begins. “The UN meets in Vienna to ratify the Accords. Talk it over.” 
     Natasha speaks up, “And if we don’t come to a decision you don’t like?”
     “Then you retire.” 
     The elevator stops and you look up seeing the Secretary walk in with someone behind him. You give him a subtle disgusted look before turning your attention back to the security footage.
     As the deathtrap descends, you can feel his eyes lingering on you. 
     “Can I help you?” 
     “You’re a little young to be an intern.” 
     “You’re a little old to be looking at me like that,” you shrug, swiping away from the video on your tablet as you feel him looking over your shoulder. 
     Ross gives an awkward chuckle and furrows his eyebrows. When you reach the bottom floor, he gets ready to step out and places a hand on your shoulder. 
     You look at him like he’s lost his mind. 
     “You seem like a good kid. Be sure to make good choices.” 
     Raising an eyebrow, you refrain from saying what you want to say. You lift your hand and gently take his off of you. 
     “Don’t touch me,” 
     Once he exits, you hear the chatting start back up.
     “Secretary Ross has a Congressional Medal of Honor,” Rhodes told Sam. “Which is one more than you have. 
     “So let’s say we agree to this thing,” Wilson starts. “How long is it gonna be before they LoJack us like a bunch of common criminals?”
     “117 countries want to sign this. 117, Sam, and you’re just like, ‘No that’s cool. We got it.” 
     “I have an equation,” Vision announces as you get back on the elevator. 
     “Oh this will clear it up,” Sam mutters. 
     “In the eight years since Mr. Stark announced himself as Iron Man, the number of known enhanced persons has grown exponentially. And during the same period, the number of potentially world-ending events has risen at a commensurate rate.“
     “Toaster oven’s got a point there,” you mumble, stepping back on the metal deathtrap. 
     Steve asks,“Are you saying it’s our fault?”
     “I’m saying there may be a causality. Our very strength invites challenge. Challenge incites conflict. And conflict… breeds catastrophe. Oversight… oversight is not an idea that can be dismissed out of hand.” 
     “Boom,” Rhodey says.                             
     You see Tony lying on the couch, quite relaxed, contradicting the tense atmosphere. 
     “Tony,” Nat starts. “You are being uncharacteristically non-hyper-verbal.”
     “It’s because he’s already made up his mind,” Steve explained. 
     “Boy, you know me so well,” Stark starts, getting up and rubbing the back of his head. “Actually I’m nursing an electromagnetic headache,” he pauses to grab a mug of coffee. “That’s what’s going on, Cap. It’s just pain. It’s discomfort. Who’s putting coffee grounds in the disposal? Am I running a bed and breakfast for a biker gang?”
     Tony puts his phone in a basket and taps the screen. An image is projected of a smiling young man. 
     “Oh, that’s Charles Spencer, by the way. He’s a great kid. Computer engineering degree, 3.6 GPA. Had a floor level gig at Intel planned for the fall. But first, he wanted to put a few miles on his soul, before he parked it behind a desk. See the world. Maybe be of service. Charlie didn’t want to go to Vegas or Fort Lauderdale, which is what I would do. He didn’t go to Paris or Amsterdam, which sounds fun. He decided to spend his summer building sustainable housing for the poor. Guess where, Sokovia.”
     He pauses for a second as the team soaks in the information.
     “He wanted to make a difference, I suppose. I mean, we won’t know because we dropped a building on him while we were kicking ass.
     “There’s no decision-making process here. We need to be put in check! Whatever form that takes, I’m game. If we can’t accept limitations, if we’re boundary-less, we’re no better than the bad guys.”
     “Tony, someone dies on your watch, you don’t give up,” Steve rebuttals.
     “Who said we’re giving up?” 
     “We are if we’re not taking responsibility for our actions. This document just shifts the blame.”
     “I’m sorry. Steve,” Rhodey blurted. “That-that is dangerously arrogant. This is the United Nations we’re talking about. It’s not the World Security Council, it’s not SHIELD, it’s not HYDRA.”
      “No, but it’s run by people with agendas, and agendas change.”   
      “That’s good,” Tony starts. “That’s why I’m here. When I realized what my weapons were capable of in the wrong hands, I shut it down and stopped manufacturing.  
     “Tony, you chose to do that. If we sign this, we surrender our right to choose. What if this panel sends us somewhere we don’t think we should go? What if there is somewhere we need to go, and they don’t let us? We may not be perfect, but the safest hands are still our own.”
     “If we don’t do this now, it’s gonna be done to us later. That’s a fact. That won’t be pretty.”
     Wanda finally speaks up, “You’re saying they’ll come for me.”
     “We would protect you,” Vision promised. 
     “Maybe Tony’s right,” the redhead speaks. “If we have one hand on the wheel, we can still steer. If we take it off--”
     “Aren’t you the same woman who told the government to kiss her ass a few years ago?” Sam interrupts. 
     “I’m just… I’m reading the terrain. We have made… some very public mistakes. We need to win their trust back. 
     “Focus up,” Tony says. “I’m sorry, did I just mishear or did you agree with me?”
     “Oh, I want to take it back now.”
     “No, no, no. You can’t retract it. Thank you. Unprecedented. Okay, case-closed--I win.” 
     From what you see, Steve stands to leave abruptly. 
     You then walk out of the elevator, tablet still in hand with the footage up. The captain walks past you just as you turn the corner and spot the team. 
     “Someone’s upset,” you hum. 
     You walk past everyone towards the fridge and grab a water bottle. 
     “Anyway, that was very childish. And kinda stupid.” 
     Inquisitive looks are thrown your way and you hold up the tablet awkwardly as you plop down on a chair. 
     “I was watching you. I kinda do that a lot. It’s not as creepy as it sounds.” 
     You open the bottle and take a sip. 
     “What are you doing down here kid--”
     “Ahhh,” you interrupt. “Don’t call me a kid. I haven’t been a child for years.”
     “Just answer the question,” Tony snaps. 
     “I like to stay informed. No one tells me anything and while you think that these private meetings only affect you, it doesn’t. It affects me too. You may not remember I’m your child but several people do. And that puts me in danger. So yes, I listen to your conversations to make sure it’s nothing I need to worry about.” 
     An awkward silence washes over as you gulp down more water. 
     “Anyway, I was just riding up and down the elevator waiting for you guys to finish. That Ross dude is kinda creepy by the way. But you’re really considering signing that thing?” 
     “Not you too,” your father mutters. 
      You let out a laugh and everyone looks at you strangely. 
      “Is this funny to you?” Rhodey asks. 
      “Yes,” you stop laughing abruptly. “I find it hilarious that this is the same government that was ready to drop a nuke on the city during the Battle of New York not giving a damn about a single civilian that was still in the area. I find it hilarious that this is the same government that lets thousands of children and women of color go missing and not do a thing about it. It’s funny that this is the same government that let HYDRA, Red Room, AIM; all that shit grow right under their nose. It’s funny because this government is the same one that uses taxpayer money for dumb ass projects and unnecessary military funding instead of using it to fund shit that helps the civilians they claim they care so much about. I mean how can you not find this situation amusing?”
     “Look,” Tony attempts. 
     “I’m not finished,” you challenge, looking him dead in the eyes. “This government don’t give a damn about y’all, especially not the three of us,” you say, gesturing to yourself, Sam, and Rhodey. “We’d be booted out of this country before you could even blink if they ever got the chance and you know that.
     “I don’t know why y’all are so adamant on gaining the government’s trust when they don’t give a flying fuck about you or these goddamn civilians. All they care about is power. They don’t care how many civilians come up missing or die in some tragic accident. It doesn’t matter what happens. When they see someone becoming richer or smarter or more powerful than they are, they will do anything to shut that shit down. 
     “I don’t understand how you can’t see that. And maybe it’s just me. Maybe it’s just me and my experience,” you pause, catching the gaze of every person in the room with hard eyes. You take a deep breath and try to calm down. “Sign it if you want to. Think about how many lives you’ll lose then.”
     You stand from your spot and walk into the open elevator, ready to get to the comfort of your bed. 
-
     It had been two days since the initial meeting and you were currently sitting on Michelle’s bed watching her read. 
     “You’re really pretty,” you muttered out of the blue.
     You saw your girlfriend’s cheeks develop a subtle red tint as she mumbled back a ‘thank you, and continued reading. You groan and gently pull the book out of her hands. 
     “Hey,” she quietly protests. 
     “Please,” you pout, holding your arms out as an invitation.
     MJ fondly rolls her eyes before lowering herself onto you. You hummed contently and squeezed her before planting a kiss on her cheek. 
     She surprised you by turning her head and giving you a lingering kiss. That one kiss soon turned into something more. 
     Michelle gently pushed you onto your back and straddled your hips. Bending down she kissed you once again, her lips gliding with yours. 
     This continued for a few minutes, taking small breaks in between to breathe. You don’t think you could ever get enough of her and hoped that she was feeling similarly.
     You kissed until your jaws hurt. The euphoric feeling still lingered as MJ rested her forehead against yours, trying to catch her breath. 
     “We should do that again sometime,” you mumbled. 
     Your girlfriend nodded in response, giving one more chaste kiss to your lips before dropping to your side. 
     “Tomorrow,” she said after glancing at the clock that read 10:47. 
     “Guess I’m spending the night then.” 
     “I have no problem with that.”
-
     The next day, you were awoken by beeping from your phone. Once you were fully aware of your surroundings you picked up the device and read the notifications that M.I.A sent through. Scanning through them, you sat up with urgency and played the video. 
     “A bomb hidden in a news van ripped through the UN building in Vienna. More than 70 people have been injured. At least 12 are dead, including Wakanda’s King T’Chaka. Officials have released a video of a suspect who they have identified as James Buchanan Bares, the Winter Soldier. The infamous HYDRA agent, linked to numerous acts of terrorism and political assassinations.”
     Carefully removing Michelle’s arm from around your waist, you stand up and move to the corner of the room. You press the contact and hold the phone up to your ear. 
      “Nat what the fuck is going on?”
     You hear the woman sigh on the other side of the phone.     “Look, just… stay wherever you are.”
     “Yeah, okay, whatever. I want answers, Nat.”
     “(Y/n),” she says firmly. “Calm down and go back to whatever you were doing. Right now, this does not concern you and I would like it to stay that way. Do you understand me?”
     There was some silence, before you let out a forced chuckle. 
     “Okay, whatever. Bye.”
     “(Y/n) c’mo--”
     You disconnected the call and gently tossed the phone onto MJ’s desk.     “You sound stressed.” 
     Turning around to face the bed, you see Michelle sat up and leaning against the headboard. You nod slowly and crawl your way up towards her. 
     “I am.”
     You feel her hand take hold of your clenched ones and she rubs them, causing you to relax slightly. 
     “There was a um, bombing at the--the um… signing thing. And no one wants to tell me what’s going on, so,” you end the sentence, shrugging. 
     MJ’s head drops onto your shoulder and you let her cuddle close. 
     “They told me to stay where I was. So hopefully we can get something good out of that.” 
     There was no response and you thought she had fallen back asleep, but you were proven wrong when your girlfriend started getting up. 
     “C’mon,” she instructed, holding her hand out when she saw the look of confusion on your face. 
     Taking her hand, the two of you made your way to the kitchen. 
     She turned around and grabbed your shoulders. 
     “We are going to make some breakfast… or lunch whatever. And then we are going to binge watch until we can binge watch no longer. Alright?”
     You nod your head, chuckling and then got to work. 
-
     It had been days since you last heard from anyone. No updates from Natasha. M.I.A even told you there hasn’t even been a great deal of movement in the compound. Today you decided you would head back. 
     When you arrived it was quiet. As you walked down the halls you heard distant chatter and followed it. 
     Turning the corner, you were surprised at what you saw. 
     “What the hell happened?”
     The two men turned to look your way, but you were given no answers. 
     Tony had bruises on his face and he looked more tense than usual. Rhodey had some sort of tech on his legs. 
     “You fought them. You fought them all, didn’t you?” 
     Both men looked away and avoided your gaze. 
     “You didn’t even listen to what I said. This is what the government does. I tried to tell you, but you didn’t even fucking listen,” you ranted, your voice slightly raising.
     “Us breaking apart wasn’t the government. Most of this is on some guy th--”
     “Well the government allowed it to happen so I’d say it is their fault!” 
     You turned to your father with pleading eyes. 
     “Where are they, Tony?”
     “Kid, they’re criminals now, I don’t--”
     “Stop calling me that! I’m--I’m not some kid. I’m not your kid,” you let out a frustrated breath. “You--you couldn’t talk it out? Like mature adults? You just had to go assert your dominance somewhere--in what? An--an airport? Some vacant lot? You just had to fight. Do you not know how to communicate?” 
     You looked at the two men, shook your head, and brushed past them. 
     Just when things were alright.
-
     “(Y/n)?” 
     “What M.I.A?”
     You were currently laying in your bed trying to control the tears that were begging to fall from your eyes due to the amount of overwhelming shit you had been hit with. You talked with MJ for a little while and while it helped a bit, you honestly were still feeling like… well shit.
     “There’s a package for you.” 
     Furrowing your eyebrows, you head down to where the mail is usually placed, get the package with your name on it, and head back to your room. 
     Grabbing a pair of scissors, you cut the tape and open the box. Inside was a letter and a phone. 
     Hey sweetheart.
     It was Natasha’s handwriting.
     I’m sorry. I really am. We all are. I wish things wouldn’t have ended this way, but they did and we can’t really do anything about it now. 
     I listened to what you said. I listened and I tried my best to understand. I don’t think I ever wanted to sign the accords in the first place. The only reason I did so was so that we could stay together. So that I could stay with you. This team is the only family I’ve had in a long time. The fact that that stack of papers could end that scared me. 
     I just kept trying to convince myself that signing the Accords was the right thing to do; anything to keep this team together. Anything to keep everything from falling apart. 
     But the more I thought about it, I realized. You were right. Everything you said. This government doesn’t care. And if the government doesn’t care like they’re supposed to then we need to. People need the government, but they don’t have it. They do have us though. And they always will. 
     I love you. I didn’t say it enough and I don’t know when or if I’ll ever get to tell you that again. You are so precious to me and I’m sorry I couldn’t stay. If you ever need anything, you can always give me a call. 
     You wiped your eyes and gently picked up the phone. You held it in your hands for a moment before setting it down. You folded the letter back up neatly and placed both items in the top drawer of your nightstand. 
     You laid back down on your bed with less tears on your face. 
-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-
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joaquinwhorres · 4 years ago
Text
Blank Out - Ch. 2 (Bucky Barnes x Reader)
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[ Masterlist ]
SUMMARY ››››› Bucky Barnes has a list of names–amends he needs to make. When he gets to yours, he finds the amends process a bit more…difficult than it should be.
WORD COUNT ››››› 3,550-ish
WARNINGS ››››› language
A/N ››››› I’ve decided that this story calls for alternating perspectives. Also, lemme know what you think about how this explores post-End Game life.
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"You know Bucky Barnes?!"
Rocio was upon you before you had even fully entered the dining room. Despite the fact that it was probably cutting off her circulation, the eight year old was still proudly wearing her "Soldier Arm". You were surprised she could even put it on anymore, a thought that brought on the bittersweet feeling of nostalgia. When the two of you had constructed the costume four years ago, you had needed to roll the ends of the glove up and then safety pin it to the top of Rocio's sleeve to keep it from sliding off. Now it didn't even reach her shoulder anymore.
"I never mentioned that?" you asked, raising an eyebrow.
"No!" Rocio exclaimed
"Oh," you shrugged, rounding the table and passing by a wiggling Ravi in his booster seat.
Rocio fell into step behind you letting out an indignant and frustrated sound. "Why didn't you ever tell me?"
She had an amazing and irritating talent for both shouting and whining at the same time. You breathed out your annoyance through her nose.
"Rocio," you said, flatly. "Do you really think I know Bucky Barnes and kept it a secret from you?"
The little girl pouted for a second as she thought it over before slowly shaking her head. "You're not very good at keeping secrets."
"Hey," you pointed a finger at her.  "I never told anyone about your crush on Spider-Man did I?"
"I was six!"
"And yet, old enough to propose," you grinned, remembering finding the letter Rocio had addressed to Spider-Man with haphazardly spaced and sized letters. It had taken a few attempts to decipher some of the spelling, but it had proven excellent material to tease Rocio about for the past two years.
Your niece scowled at you and marched back to the table, dramatically throwing herself back into her chair.
You turned back to the stove and the probably cold eggs, smiling to yourself in victory. It was a brief moment of peace as you dished eggs onto three plates because the moment you popped the first one in the microwave, the interrogation started back up.
"Well, if you don't know him, why was he here?"
"He wanted to talk to me and your mom," you said, watching the eggs spin round and round.
"About what?"
"The weather."
"Y/N!" Rocio hit her hand against the table, causing Ravi to jump in his seat and stare at his sister with wide eyes.
You whirled on your niece. "Rocio Ishani, you know better."
"Sorry," Rocio mumbled, casting her eyes down to the table--one of her tells of genuine embarrassment and regret. The microwave beeped, and you sighed, switching the plate out for another one.
"I don't know what he wants to have a conversation about. He was here for three minutes and you did most of the talking. And even if I did know," you added on, stopping Rocio before words could come out of the little girl's open mouth. "I don't think it's a child friendly conversation. Which means when he comes, you're going to your room."
"He's coming back?"
You nodded. "When your mom comes to pick you up," you said, stopping the eggs with six seconds left on the clock. You took the two plates to the table, setting the hot one down in front of your seat and the warm one in front of Rocio. You raised your eyebrows at your niece, gesturing with your head to the kitchen before turning back to get Ravi's plate. Rocio trailed you in, pulling out the silverware drawer to get forks for the three of you and tearing off three paper towels as napkins. She still hadn't quite grasped that Ravi wouldn't be using a napkin however much he needed one. Instead, she ripped one half sheet into a quarter, as if that would convince him to use it in the same way that the small bright green fork convinced him to be somewhat civilized in his eating instead of using his hands.
It was a few more minutes before you were all at the table, ready to eat.
"Your arm, please," you said, gesturing to Rocio's glove. The little girl put up no fight, shimmying out of it and lightly laying it on the empty chair next to her, signature side up so she could admire it all of breakfast.
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While the interrogation seemed to be over, talk of the Avengers was not. Most of the breakfast conversation revolved around ranking the Avengers from most powerful to least powerful, and most helpful to least helpful, and the ever ambiguous "best" to "worst." And then, as it did with young kids, talk bounced from subject  to subject--connected only by the vaguest semblance of eight year old logic. It ended with a request to watch Wild Kratts after breakfast.
You did.
You did a lot of other things after breakfast too.
You made and played with play dough and stopped when you noticed Ravi was alternating between building with his and eating it.
You each drew pictures for Lilly with varying degrees of realism, had a fashion show turned impromptu dance party, and played hide and seek during Ravi's nap. (Rocio was such a good hider that you hadn't found her until after Ravi woke up, and you were definitely looking very hard and not reading a book.)
You painted each other's nails, and built an epic race car track for Ravi and made individual pizzas.
You raked leaves outside and picked a few favorites to press in books and even found time to fit in a small hurt self/strong self activity before Lilly arrived.
You were in the middle of deconstructing eating your creations when the front door opened.
"Where is my family?"
You looked up with a smile and gestured towards the door, but Rocio remained put. "We're in here!" she shouted, fingers sticky with peanut butter and fluff.
Lilly sauntered into the room, her emerald green suit still pressed and wrinkleless despite a day on the job. She arched her perfectly threaded eyebrows as she looked at you and daughter and the table all covered in graham cracker crumbs. "Looks like you three had a good day."
"Yep!" Rocio chirped, and Lilly clicked forward and into the corner of the room where Ravi was playing with his two cars on a section of the track.
"How is it my two year old is the least messy of the three of you?" she asked, bending over to press a kiss to Ravi's head. He squirmed away, continuing to move his cars along the track.
You laughed as Rocio licked a finger clean of peanut butter. "Because Ravi takes after you, and Rocio takes after me," you said, grinning at Rocio. Lilly frowned and crossed back over to the girls. "Don't worry though, I think we're all adventured out, so tomorrow we're just going to sit and stare at the walls."
"No!" Rocio shouted, and Lilly hushed her.
You tilted your head as if thinking. "I guess we could wash my car," you said, tapping your chin with a finger. "And the baseboards do need some dusting."
Rocio let out a dramatic groan, and you laughed, picking up a napkin to rub away at the spot of marshmallow fluff on her chin.
"Well, if you're not going to clean my house, you can at least clean your hands."
Rocio gave you a look of exasperation that she should have been much too young to even think about giving. Nevertheless, she slid out of her chair and headed to the sink, Lilly stopping her en route so she could press a kiss to the top of her daughter's head.
"How was work?" you asked as Lilly sunk into Rocio's vacated chair.
"People are idiots," Lilly rolled her eyes, giving a sigh.
"Says the literal genius," you returned, and Lilly snorted, shaking her head.
"It doesn't take a genius to follow simple instructions. I'll lay everything out for them, and even with pictures, they can't complete a single build without running into some potentially catastrophic error."
"That's not what you want to hear from the lead engineer at Stark Energy."
Rocio skipped back to the table, and Lilly scooched out her chair, gesturing for Rocio to come sit on her lap. The little girl veered off early though, instead attempting to climb into your lap. You shook her head, casting a quick glance at your sister who dropped her open arms.
"Your mom's missed you," you said, gesturing with her head across the table.
"I live with her," Rocio whined.
"And?" Lilly asked, moving her chair back up to the table. "I still miss you when I work."
"Really?" Rocio asked, walking over to the chair next to Lilly, and claiming it.
"Really," Lilly assured, placing an arm on the back of Rocio's chair, gently combing through her daughter's hair with her fingers. She looked up at you offering a small, weak smile before looking back down at her daughter. Her brow creased. "What are you sitting on?" she asked, tugging at something underneath Rocio. The little girl joined her mom in looking down, her eyes lighting up as she recognized the object.
"My Soldier Arm! Oh yeah! Guess who we met today!"
"Who?" Lilly asked.
"No, guess!"
You would have to teach your niece about the art of not playing a guessing game after making the answer so obvious. Then again, it still seemed so surreal that Bucky Barnes would turn up at your doorstep, that even with the "Soldier Arm", you doubted that Lilly would guess.
Lilly pursed her lips, putting on a show of thought. "Was it--"
There was a knock at the front door interrupting Lilly's guess. Rocio practically launched herself from the chair, already halfway out of the room by the time she could scream "I'll get it!"
"No!" Ravi shouted. His usual reaction when Rocio was too loud, too energetic, too Rocio.
Lilly exhaled a laugh at her son before turning back to you. "This was too much sugar," she said, circling a finger around Rocio's half-eaten creation. You laughed and Lilly smiled, and it felt nice for things to be normal between you--easy. Even if it was just for a moment.
A moment that was brought to a screeching halt by Rocio dragging Bucky Barnes into the combined kitchen and dining room by the hand.
"We met Bucky Barnes!" she chirped.
Lilly's face went slack, only managing to get out a small "Holy shit." Your eyes didn't linger long on your sister though. Instead your gaze was drawn to Bucky Barnes who looked vaguely amused at Rocio.
"Rocio, release your captive," you prompted, and reluctantly, Rocio released his hand, taking a few steps back towards her mother to give him some space.
"Is this--are you--what is happening here?" Lilly asked, looking between Bucky and you and Rocio, as if one of you had a reasonable explanation for this.You had only ever seen your sister this flustered twice before. Both of the previous occasions had been heartbreaking and traumatic, and you'd never quite gotten to experience how funny flustered Lilly was.
"He wants to talk to you and Y/N about something!" Rocio filled in.
Lilly's head whipped to you. "You know him?" she whispered, as if this was some secret conversation for your ears only.
You shook her head. "No, he just came by this morning and asked to speak with us."
"About what?" Lilly asked, furrowing her eyebrows and looking back to Bucky.
"I don't know."
For all of the differences between Lilly and Rocio--and there were many--their brain processing was eerily similar.
Bucky cleared his throat, drawing your attention back to him. "I um--I don't know if you want--" he gestured to Rocio. "Here for this."
"Rocio, go to your ro--the playroom," you corrected.
"I promise I'll be quiet if you let me--" Rocio started, and Lilly cut her off.
"Rocio, take your brother and go up to the playroom please,"
"But--" Rocio's face melted into the start of a complaint, but there a sharp cut of her mother's eyes stopped her dead. You remembered being on the receiving end of that look quite a few times while she was growing up. If anything it'd grown in power.
Rocio stomped forward, taking Ravi by the hand who whined and complained until she let him pick up a few cars to take with him, and the two exited the room, heavy footsteps echoing up the staircase.
You turned back to Bucky who was staring over Lilly's head, at the wall of family pictures.
The idea had hit you four years ago after Rocio woke up crying from a nightmare. Together, you spent the night going through old photo albums and Facebook albums, searching for the best pictures of the family. You ended the night with about forty pictures that needed to be framed, and the whole project took about a week to finish.
Every time the two of you ate lunch together over the past four years, Rocio would choose a picture, and you would tell her the story behind the picture. Your eyes flitted amongst them now.
There was the first time Lilly held you as a baby which was also the first time you smiled. Lilly's high school graduation--one of the few pictures with both of your parents in it, hovering on either side of Lilly as a six year old you sat on her hip. Lilly and Hector's beautiful wedding day. Lilly and Hector at your high school graduation. Lilly and you at the baby shower for Rocio, and Lilly and Hector at the shower for Ravi. There was one of Rocio's grandparents meeting her for the first time, and a good number of photos documenting your visits out to the family. Before the blip.
During your four years together, you and Rocio had also taken pictures of memories the family couldn't be there for and hung them on the wall; reminders of stories to tell should they ever return.
Rocio and you moving into a new house.
Rocio's first day of Kindergarten, first, and second grade.
The two of you and Rocio's ill-fated hamster, Churro.
Birthday parties and day trips that the rest of the family should have attended.
Bucky stared at the pictures, his frown deepening.
"Would you like to sit?" Lilly invited, allowing her collected professional persona to seep into her voice and straighten her spine.
The super soldier nodded, choosing the chair at the end of the table, closest to the door. He wet his lips, his eyes drawn from the pictures and down to the wooden table. It was strange seeing an Avenger--someone who had fought Thanos--seem so nervous in the company of two ordinary women.
He reminded you of the fourth graders who entered your office.
The fourth graders were always so hesitant to work with you--terrified of opening up and showing even a glimpse of vulnerability. It took three sessions just to get them to admit that they weren't fine and a few more before they lost the skittish look in their eyes. You doubted Bucky would be pried open by bags of chips or any of her fidgets, but figured you could at least try.
"Can I get you something to drink?" you asked, and Bucky shook his head.
"I don't want to take up too much of your time."
You nodded, and Lilly cocked her head. "So what brings an Avenger to my sister's house?"
He wet his lips and then looked up at the pair of you. "You're part of my efforts to make amends." Bucky made an attempt at a smile.
Across the table, Lilly's chest constricted with barely suppressed laughter, and the corners of your lips twitched in and out of a smile. Whoever had advised him to smile, surely hadn't meant for him to smile like that.
"What are you here to make amends for?" Lilly asked, her voice steady and betraying none of her amusement.
"I…" his eyes drifted back to the wall of pictures looming beside the group. "I'm the one responsible for your parents death."
You felt the world stop.
Or maybe it wasn't the world, maybe you stopped. Maybe every single atom within you stilled for a moment. Maybe your brain shut down and heart paused its beating, keeping you from thinking or feeling anything other than the numbness of shock. Because as surprising as it was for Bucky Barnes to show up on your doorstep at ten in the morning, you never expected he was responsible for changing your entire life.
"I know there's nothing, I could ever do to truly make amends--"
"You don't need to make amends."
Everything seemed to restart then. Your heart picked up its beating and brain whirred into action, sifting through memories and thoughts you'd long ago pushed to the back of your mind and locked there to remain untouched even by years of therapy.
Your skin prickled with flashes of images. The dark figure at the top of the staircase, the glint of metal you'd assumed was a gun in his hand, the cold blankness of his stare as his eyes bore into yours. And then the horror and sick relief of finding your parents in the moments after his disappearance.
"They were horrible people, and I'm glad they're dead. Thank you for salvaging my childhood"
"Y/N," Lilly gasped, horrified.
"You hated them too," you argued back. "Don't pretend you're not glad that Rocio and Ravi never have to meet them."
"Our relationship with our parents aside, they were still our parents. The least we can do is not thank the man who murdered them in their sleep."
Bucky for his part looked completely bewildered as his eyes darted between the two arguing sisters.
You shook your head. "You were more of a parent to me than they ever were."
"And it's because of that that I remember you waking up screaming every night for three years. So if you're not going to ask for amends for our parents' murder, at least ask for amends for what you had to go through because of him."
"My nightmares aren't because of him," you dismissed. Lilly would never believe--let alone understand--the reason behind your nightmares.
Seeing the argument was fruitless, Lilly tsked and dismissed you with a flip of her hair, turning instead to address Bucky. "Why?"
"Why…" Bucky stumbled along, confused by the conversational whiplash or the vague question.
"Why did you kill our parents?" Lilly demanded.
"Does it matter?" you asked.
"It matters to me."
You stared at your sister for a solid thirty seconds before, and shutting your eyes and bowing your head in surrender. Lilly didn't understand. If you had it your way, Lilly would never understand. You would never burden your sister like that.
Bucky swallowed hard. "I wasn't told the specifics of every...assignment. All I know is that your parents were working on something HYDRA wanted, and when they were offered a chance to join the cause, they declined. I was tasked with eliyoution and retrieval."
"Retrieval?" Lilly pressed
"Of their research."
Lilly gave him a single nod before looking down at the table in front of her. "I didn't even know they were conducting their own research."
You felt her skin prickle, an icy hot sensation shooting through your veins. Carefully calm, you reached across the table, palms open for your sister's hands. Lilly placed her hands into yours. "They never let us get to know them," you said gently, squeezing Lilly's hands. "That's why I'm angry and you're hurt."
Even as you said this, you could feel Bucky's gaze on you, intently studying your motions and facial expressions.
You looked back at him. "Thank you for coming to tell us. I'm sure it wasn't easy."
He nodded, his brow still slightly creased as he looked at her. And then his gaze flicked to Lilly, and you released a breath.
"I know it doesn't mean much--it doesn't change anything, but I'm not the person who did that anymore. I am no longer the Winter Soldier. I am James "Bucky" Barnes."
Lilly nodded, releasing your hands and looking Bucky square in the face. Her own expression was completely neutral, not a trace of a tear or any of the hurt she'd voiced.
"If you want to make amends, you should come here for Thanksgiving."
Neither you nor Bucky had been expecting that. Your instinctive reaction was to snort out a laugh as if it were a joke, and Bucky looked like the very dictionary definition of confusion: brow knitted together, eyes narrowed, mouth hanging open.
"It would mean the world to my daughter. You can think about it as replacing a memory of my daughter meeting her grandparents. you's right, this will probably be a happier memory anyway."
"You have to come!" Rocio rushed into the room, you and Lilly shouting her name in a mixture of surprise, horror, and reprimand. The eight year old made no excuses or explanations. Instead she stood by Bucky's chair, peering up at him with a bright intensity only a child could muster. "Please."
Bucky looked away from Rocio to Lilly and then you. "Ok."
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sorceressferaly · 3 years ago
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Hello fellow Mayalexer. I’d like to know what you think the long term consequences of the Ashland Volcano erupting would be? Sincerely, definitely not someone chronicling Jorvik.
Hello fellow Mayalex person who is definitely not a friend in real life to whom I hinted at that I wanted to answer this very question!
Something that is pretty interesting about large-scale volcanic eruptions is that they cause a lasting effect on the climate for the years to come.
"Little ice-ages" is a phenomenon that can be caused partially by volcanic eruptions, as the ashes linger in the stratosphere and block solar radiation. This leads to worldwide global cooling, which has resulted in harsh winters and poor harvests in the past.
In this post, I will compare a theoretical eruption of Garnok’s Fury with the eruption of an Icelandic volcano in 536, which had devastating consequences globally.
Warning: This might get pretty dark.
The year 536, volcanic eruptions were likely to be - or at the very least a major contributor to - the cause of a "darkening of the sky" where volcanic sulfur and particles coated the skies of the entire northern hemisphere and led to a major drop in temperatures for the next decade.
Catastrophic for the people alive by that time, and in the Mediterranean area a terrible plague named the Plague of Justinian* followed in the wake of the harsh conditions, killing millions.
“During this year a most dread portent took place. For the sun gave forth its light without brightness … and it seemed exceedingly like the sun in eclipse, for the beams it shed were not clear.” - Procopius, Byzantine historian, regarding the disastrous year 536.
Volcanic eruptions pose a danger stretching far beyond the initial eruption. Garnok's Fury would indeed have consequences of global reach!
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So what would that mean for Jorvik? Well, if we consider that the consequences of the eruptions of 536 have been speculated by religious scholars to potentially be the source of myths such as the Fimbulvinter**, I think we can say that Jorvik is in for their very own ice age.
However, it's difficult to predict climate change directly in Jorvik, since the climate on the island is influenced not only by volcanic energy but very much by the inherent magic that exists on the island.
For this reason, while I believe that Jorvik wouldn't be covered in ice that would make the island completely uninhabitable, the people of Jorvik would be in for a harsh time.
The most immediate effect, as I mentioned in my previous post, would be the destruction of the dam in the Great Reservoir, which is said to provide most of the electricity and drinking water in Jorvik.
While we don't know the exact size or volume of the Great Reservoir, we know that Lisa describes it as more of an ocean than a dam, and old Jorvegian tales have said that it is bottomless. "Bottomless" is a bit difficult to calculate though, so to find a real-life Jorvik comparison, I'm going to look at a pretty big dam instead.
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Karahnjukavirkjun in Iceland is capable of generating 4600 GWh of power annually, which according to the US Bureau of Reclamation is enough to provide electricity to about 1.5 million people. Since the population of Jorvik is likely below a million as Jorvik is supposed to be a relatively small and overlooked island nation on the world stage (only about 350.000 people live on Iceland) this one generator should cover most of Jorvik’s needs.
However, Karahnjukavirkjun is meant to generate power to the Icelandic aluminum industry. Aluminum production requires a ridiculous amount of energy... but Jorvik has no such industry. In fact – Jorvik doesn’t seem to host much of an industry at all!
I asked @jorvegian-chronicler for a second opinion on the industries of Jorvik, and besides raising horses and manufacturing equipment for equestrian needs, it seems like the largest industries on Jorvik would likely be the drilling/mining of natural resources such as oil/gas and fishing/farming second. These industries would have far less need of energy than aluminum production, and thus, the Great Reservoir may be the only source of hydroelectric power production on Jorvik.
However, hydroelectric power is not the only power source on Jorvik. Just like Iceland, Jorvik is likely to have access to a great amount of geothermal power and may use that to provide central heating - which the Jorvegians will likely need once the sky goes dark. There are also the aforementioned great reserves of oil and gas around the island, but it seems like these resources are mainly mined by private companies and not used by the state to provide additional electricity (which they wouldn’t need anyway), so most of the fossil fuels produced on Jorvik might be export only.
Aside from electricity, Linda states in Darkness Falling that most of the drinking water in Jorvik comes from the Great Reservoir. The only canonical area we know that has its own water supply is Dundull and with no more information available we must assume that it is indeed the only local source of drinking water, and all larger settlements such as Jorvik City and Jarlaheim are completely dependent on the Great Reservoir.
We can also make the fairly safe assumption that any farmers on Jorvik rely on an irrigation system powered by freshwater from the Great Reservoir.
Armed with this knowledge (read: qualified guesswork) we can now start speculating what will happen in Jorvik’s own day after tomorrow.
When the dam breaches, it will release an enormous flood of water that will crush everything in its way, eliminating any settlements in the direction of the tidal wave of water that will mercilessly flow out of the broken dam. Canonical locations affected would be Meander Village and Pine Hill Manor. They would likely have some time available for evacuation, but so much for Mr. Sands.
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The second effect would be the failure of most of the Jorvegian power grid. While central heating might be covered by geothermal power plants, light, household apparatuses, computers, and various entertainment systems would be shut down. There might be enough emergency power to provide power for an emergency broadcast or low-level lighting, but this emergency power wouldn’t last forever.
If Jorvik has any coal or oil-powered plants, they’d need to start working overtime to fill the power vacuum. However, with Jorvik being very environmentally conscious I believe they would have decommissioned most of the fossil-fueled power plants.
The third effect would be the loss of clean drinking water. You never realize how much water you use until the tap dries up. Mistfall lake seems to be an independent water source, and Silversong River could likely be fueled by meltwater from Dino Valley, but the largest cities in Jorvik – Jorvik City and Jarlaheim – would be without clean water.
There are wells placed around Jorvik that still would be fine to use, but those wells are mainly intended to provide water for the horses in Jorvik, not to provide water for the humans in the cities.
It seems odd to place all the eggs in a single basket by relying so much on this one dam, but I’m not one to question Linda on her knowledge of Jorvegian infrastructure.
A likely consequence is that the Jorvegians that can do so should seek their way to the countryside and smaller settlements. Any village with wells present has a source of groundwater which Jorvik City does not.
The Jorvegian government will have to arrange for water to be transported from other sources, and since Jorvik City is close to Dundull, giant tank trucks would likely be sent into the Mistfall national park in order to transport some of that water back to Jorvik City. . Perhaps GED can make a fortune here by selling Go! Energy Drinks?
Local wells wouldn’t be enough to support large-scale irrigation of agriculture, however, and it would be likely that harvests would fail all around Jorvik that year, as there wouldn’t be enough water available to provide enough for an agricultural industry.
This would be a huge hit to Jorvik’s economy, which relies on the fertile land for a large number of crops, and we all know that it doesn’t seem to rain nearly enough on Jorvik to make up for the loss of irrigation water.
If the harvests would be bad the first year, the subsequent years will be even worse, as the sun will be blocked out by volcanic particles which will lead to a cooldown over the entire northern hemisphere. Reports from the year 536 speak about crop failures and a “failure in bread”, implying that the large amounts of grain grown on Jorvik may not survive the colder climate.
Failing crops and poor harvests will lead to a huge economic deficit not only for the agricultural industry but for the equestrian industry as well. Much of the crops grown on Jorvik are not meant for the human population to consume, but rather to feed Jorvik’s obsession with the equestrian industry.
With an agricultural industry in decline over the next few years, it follows that the equestrian industry can no longer be supported to the same extent.
Several of the horse breeds imported to Jorvik over time may not have the build to survive the colder climate at this time and would need to be transported away from the island. Indigenous and cold-resistant breeds may have better luck, but with no agricultural industry to support them, it’s likely that the equestrian industry as a whole would need to downsize.
This would indirectly impact Jorvik’s tourism industry, as fewer young people would be spending their summer vacation in Jorvik for several years. In fact, Jorvik would likely not experience another summer for years to come!***
On the upside, Jorvik’s glue industry has a bright future ahead.
Fortunately, the fishing and fossil fuel industries wouldn’t be nearly as badly affected by the disaster. With crops failing, the fishing industry would be even more paramount for domestic food production, and Cape West might grow from a small fishing village to a large harbor to support the increased needs for fishing and shipping.
The fossil fuel industries would have to be relied on to provide domestic energy production until the dam can be rebuilt, as well as powering the boats used by the fishing industry.
This increased need for domestic use of fossil fuels would likely hurt Jorvik’s ability to export said fossil fuels, which may have far-reaching consequences globally, as peace never tends to be an option once oil is on the table. It’s unlikely that Jorvik makes up a major part of the global fossil fuel production, but such a sudden change in the worldwide fossil fuel distribution would likely have some consequences on the global market.
With the equestrian and agricultural industries failing, and the fishing and fossil fuel industries taking on more importance, more of Jorvik’s workforce would likely move to work in the industries that can offer them jobs. Carl Peterson is an experienced oil rig worker and would likely be forced to accept a job in the fossil fuel industry, leading to the Starshine Ranch falling into ruin.
Other people may be forced to leave Jorvik entirely, as the failure of the equestrian industry would mean the loss of tens of thousands of jobs in the whole country.
The construction industry would likely be staying strong. There would be a need to rebuild the dam around the Great Reservoir. Construction on the Kárahnjúkar Dam took five years to complete, so we may be looking at a similar timeframe. Hopefully, they will build it to be sturdier this time as to not break as soon as some Sun Circle teenager opens a portal to Pandoria, and also construct some backup plans in the other lakes around Jorvik.
All in all, there would doubtlessly be many years of hardship to face on Jorvik. Hardships that I’m not sure that druidic magic could help with as we’re assuming a completely natural eruption not caused by Garnok and the Hell Portal.
Linda may still be able to foresee the eruption, but if she’d try to warn anyone, she’d likely get the Cassandra**** treatment. Of course, perhaps there is something that the Soul Riders could do to stop it. We don’t know all of the magic that runs through Jorvik, and honestly, I’m sure Linda can find some ritual to banish the initial volcanic eruption to the moon. Moon Circle OP.
There would be a light at the end of the tunnel, as the sun would gradually grow stronger as the particles fade away, and warm, pleasant summers with plentiful harvests would return to Jorvik.
...
Whew, that was pretty dark.
These kinds of events tend to have far-reaching consequences, and I barely even touched on how the political, cultural, and social development could turn out following the eruption, destruction of the dam, and the long winter.
The forces of nature can be great and terrible, and I don’t think most of us tend to reflect on the awesome power of volcanoes nearly often enough. We are but specks of dust in comparison to the movement of the continental plates and the forces of the Earth. Hopefully, we will learn how to master them yet.
Thanks for reading – now please get some water, have a snack, and read something more lighthearted.
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*Poor Justinian. For all he did as a Roman Emperor, his name lives on in a plague. Constantine got a city named after him. Julius and Augustus Ceasar each got a month. Justinian got the plague. That's rough, buddy.
**Fimbulvinter is the harsh winter that ends almost all life on Midgård and is the harbinger of Ragnarok in Norse mythology. It has been theorized that this myth was based on stories of harsh winters without any summers in between, that were passed down in oral tradition as tales of the future. Winter is coming, anyone?
***On the other hand, many might be happy that snow in Jorvik is finally back. Why let a little hemispherical disaster get in the way of enjoying the year-long winter?
****Cassandra was a seer and priestess of Apollo in the Illiad myth, cursed with the power to utter completely true prophesies but never be believed. I think Linda relates to her a lot on a personal level.
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rye-views · 3 years ago
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A Promised Land by Barack Obama. 8/10
I would recommend this book to my friends. I would reread this book.
There are certain things that Barack articulates that I’m thankful for. His over-optimism and feelings of eccentricity. I completely related to its isolating feelings even though it wasn’t the same situation and experience as mine. It’s nice to see something similar from someone different. I also liked his description of feeling everything in its entirety and how it was like a movie splice. I have felt this many times and it’s a beautiful way to describe it. I like how so much of what Barack says, thinks, and feels are so genuine and relatable. It's nice to see someone articulate and empathize this well, esp. from a man and a man in power.
I love learning that Michelle was disappointed by the situation caused by his choices at times. Other things were more important at the time and nice to see it be relevant.
It’s interesting to see the difference between this book and “Becoming.” They have different aims, but it still shows me a difference between a man and woman. I also notice that when men are described, it’s always physical. When it’s women, it’s more character and personality.
Crazy how intelligent and emotionally aware Barack is. When he stated how he couldn't just pick and choose the good things of Reverend Wright's church, I was like true and wow.
The things that Toot taught Barack is what someone should've taught me as I grew up.
Barack comparing the rides to Noah's Ark is amusing.
When he mentions translations of what the Big 4 are saying, I think about how we can't be straightforward in politics. Why not?
It took me forever to read this because I really wanted to absorb the knowledge. There's a lot of events that are covered and things I had no idea about. I love how this catalogues so much of history that were relevant to my lifetime.
Memorable Quotes: “gives even my roughest drafts too smooth a gloss and lends half-baked thoughts the mask of tidiness” “I needed to focus on only those things to come.” “Much of what I read I only dimly understood” “a bond between those who had once seemed far apart.” “Whatever it was, I knew I wasn’t ready.” “An America that could explain me.” “I suffered rejections and insults often enough to stop fearing them.” “Enthusiasm makes up for a host of deficiencies.” “Failure and want were all around you.” “It should have been enough.” “but my mother was never one to see hard work as anything but good.” “On top of my sorrow, I felt a great shame.” “There’s a physical feeling, a current of emotion that passes back and forth between you and the crowd, as if your lives and theirs are suddenly spliced together, like a movie reel, projecting backward and forward in time, and your voice creeps right up to the edge of cracking, because for an instant, you feel them deeply; you can see them whole. You’ve tapped into some collective spirit, a thing we all know and wish for – a sense of connection that overrides our differences and replaces them with a giant swell of possibility – and like all things that matter most, you know the moment is fleeting and that soon the spell will be broken.” “To be a workhorse not a show horse – that was my goal.” “I had become a mere conduit through which people might recognize the value of their own stories, their own worth, and share them with one another.” "Yes we can." “the personal really was political” “I had to listen to, and not just theorize about, what mattered to people.” “it wasn’t so much what he did as how he made you feel. Like anything was possible. Like the world was yours to remake.” “It’s hard, in retrospect, to understand why you did something stupid.” “In fact, you shouldn’t even count on my vote.” “What do you consider your place in history?” “I could take a punch. And I didn’t give up.” “I knew I could afford to be patient.” “but the only way for Daddy to disguise himself is if he has an operation to pin back his ears.” “Forgotten people and forgotten voices remained everywhere.” “the more troops would become targets of an enemy they often could not see and did not understand.” “The power to inspire is rare. Moments like this are rare. You think you may not be ready, that you’ll do it at more convenient time. But you don’t choose the time. The time chooses you.” “people were moved by emotion, not facts.” “Beneath the low-key person and deep convictions, he just plain liked the combat.” "defined not by what they are but what they can never be." "To the relief of his keepers, the bear became accustomed to captivity." "he understood better than most the complications of race, religion, and family, and how good and bad, love and hate, might be hopelessly tangled in the same heart" "She was one of those quiet heroes that we have all across America." "But I worry that my memories of that night, like so much else that's happened these past twelve years, are shaded by the images that I've seen, the footage of our family walking across the stage, the photographs of the crowds and lights and magnificent backdrops." "a keeper of values we'd once thought ordinary but had learned were more rare than we had ever imagined." ""It's going to be hard to get the public excited about food stamps and repaving roads," Axe said. "Not real sexy."" "This time I said nothing, admiring his occasional, almost endearing ability to state the obvious." "You must be under the mistaken impression that I care." "all of them unified only in their common desire to be somewhere else." "ready to die for eternal joy--or maybe just a taste of something better." "But make no mistake, it was weird." "the unspoken regrets." "my supporters lacked all conviction, while my opponents were full of passionate intensity." "Michelle was someone who started from the heart and not the head, from experience rather than abstractions." "I wanted to believe that the ability to connect was still there. My wife wasn't so sure." “The
audacity of hope.” "Sometimes your most important work involved the stuff nobody noticed." "forgotten under the accumulation of the new joys and paints that make up a life." "you learn to improvise to meet your objectives--or at least to cut your losses." "They would take for granted that their aunt was on the U.S. Supreme Court, shaping the life of a nation--as would kids across the country. Which was fine. That's what progress was like." "Did they miss the rhythms of ordinary life? Were they lonely? Did they sometimes feel a jolt in their heart and wonder how it was that they had ended up where they were?" "I reminded myself that every president felt saddled with the previous administration's choices and mistakes, that 90 percent of the job was navigating inherited problems and unanticipated crises. Only if you did that well enough, with discipline and purpose, did you get a real shot at shaping the future." "Was it possible that abstract principles and high-minded ideals were and always would be nothing more than a pretense, a palliative, a way to beat back despair, but no match for the more primal urges that really moved us, so that no matter what we said or did, history was sure to run along its predetermined course, an endless cycle of fear, hunger and conflict, dominance and weakness?" "meant to be a reminder--in a place premised on hate and intolerance--of the common humanity we share." "A man making up for things." "For war was contradiction, as was the history of America." "To be known. To be heard. To have one's unique identity recognized and seen as worthy. It was a universal human desire" "pleasures that cost nothing, belonged to no one, and were accessible to all." "I suppose, when the world slows down, your strivings get pushed to the back of your mind." "whether in my seeming calm as crises piled up, my insistence that everything would work out in the end, I was really just protecting my self--and contributing to her loneliness." "It was a lonely thought at a lonely time." "You never looked as smart as the ex-president did on the sidelines." "Get exposed to other people's truths, I thought, and attitudes change." "It wasn't often, I thought, that a true act of conscience is recognized that way." "their struggles and resentments troubling but remote." "are mere conduits for the deep, relentless currents of the times or whether we're at least partly the authors of what's to come." "contemplating the knife's edge between perceived success and potential catastrophe" "daily, unheralded acts of people who weren't seeking attention but simply knew what they were doing and did it with pride." "She makes me better as a person and better on the page."
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xominniexo · 3 years ago
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                          INTRODUCING MELODY MOUSE
full name: melody matilda mouse
age: physically 26 ( immortal )
powers: sorcery with a focus on divination
siblings: ozzy mouse
face claim: bruna marquezine
pinterest for the vibe: here
— crestfallen on the landing, champagne problems.
tw: mentions of anxiety and panic attacks
it all started with a mouse... and it’s up for debate if melody is that mouse. see, she’s always felt a little like the one to the side. the one following the footsteps of her parents. the one left in the wake of an explosive younger brother, trying not to be bitter as she watches him leave yet again. it’s fine, okay? she’s fine with it.
melody had her first panic attack when she was fourteen. it came while waiting in the wings to perform a piano piece, and, if anyone had been privy to her mind since starting puberty, it wouldn’t have seemed to come out of nowhere.
melody had always been positive, kind, and intelligent. she excelled at schoolwork, she had an ear for music and took to the piano like she was made for it (though her singing voice is decidedly mediocre), and did her best to keep her brother out of trouble. as she got older, and hit puberty, things started to take a turn. beneath the presentation of a perfect little angel were headaches, irritability, trouble sleeping, and worrying. about school, about her music, about her brother, about making her parents proud.
her parents immediately did the best they could to help her with her anxiety, though that first panic attack certainly wasn’t her last. piano is now one of her best coping mechanisms - it helps the rest of the world melt away when she just needs a break.
melody’s always had a degree of awareness about her family legacy, but she didn’t know the full extent of it until ozzy turned eighteen and it was revealed that they’d both had magic their whole lives hit. it was like a bomb dropped on the happy little family, or maybe a fuse being lit that would burn until ozzy graduated. melody honestly still doesn’t know how she feels about being lied to - her powers were never as everpresent as her brother’s, and she’d been so busy compartmentalising to be there for him and learn how to actually use this magic that she’d never quite taken a step back and thought about her own feelings. needless to say, her therapist thinks that should change and she’s working on it, okay.
melody has to dig deeper for her magic. for whatever reason it isn’t always at her fingertips the way it is for her father or even her brother. nonetheless, once she was able to tap into it she immediately started working to master it. it was a tool, and not one that she wanted to mishandle. at this point, melody isn’t sure if she had a knack for divination already, or if she was just so fascinated by it that she focused on it more. either way, magic that gave her knowledge was what she leaned towards, despite it’s unreliability.
generally, melody had mixed feelings about the academy. it was good to have a place to actually learn, and she could see it’s potential. but, well. ultimately, it was more for ozzy than it was for her. hell, the whole city was for him, really. even if he never seemed to see that the same way she did. nonetheless, she wanted to see the dream grow. she’d always been the responsible one, and she was going to keep being the responsible one. even (especially) when ozzy finally graduated and that long-burning fuse ran out. when ozzy left the first time, sans immortality, she threw herself into her music and helping build the academy. it was fine. really. if he didn’t want anything to do with her or their family then fine. she’s kept out of the years long war between her father and ozzy, but it’s slowly grown a spiky mess or bitterness and resentment deep within her.
in the intervening years, before maleficent, melody started studying teaching. her anxiety which, yeah, took a fucking downswing when her little brother ditched town while totally mortal with no indication he was ever coming back, had it’s bad days and it’s good days, but medication and therapy helped. there was a stretch of bad that’d had her habitually trying to look into the future - whether a few minutes or years, for herself or vague acquaintances - to an unhealthy degree. every choice had to be considered from every angle, had to have it’s outcome checked and double-checked, until she pulled herself out of that rut. it was coming out of the end of that phase that she took up teaching, and started avoiding some of the more oracular elements of divination.
then maleficent happened. and her brother came back. melody was too relieved and delighted to resent him for leaving. she’d hoped he’d stick around, that the catastrophe would bring everyone in her family together again. yeah, right.
ozzy was gone again, ditching instead of trying to put in the fucking work to repair things with their dad. whatever. it was fucking fine.
it’s been several years since she’s seen her brother. in that time, she’s become a music teacher for younger kids, an involved member of the community, a proficient wizard, and started drafting a novel on her family legacy. she’s had a good few years, and she’s hoping to have a lot more. she’s feeling good. hopefully ozzy swinging back into town doesn’t change that!
— wanted connections.
***ex almost-fiance: listen i’ve had champagne problems stuck in my head the full week i’ve been trying to get her bio out, i just know she walked out on a proposal and your character could be that proposer!! join me for peak angst!!***
bad influence: in, like, a party/dumb decisions way or in, like, a corruption arc kinda way... 👀👀👀 can be platonic or romantic idk feel out the vibe
student: does your character want to learn how to play piano? you’ve come to the right place! she mostly teaches younger kids but u know exceptions can be made
hook up: melody does impulsive shit once in a blue moon and congrats, u made it happen! can be a one off or ongoing 👀
under her wing: idk just someone she’s decided she must look after for one reason or another. honorary little sibling vibes
confidante and/or best friend: what it says on the tin. basically the person she goes to when she needs a hug
???: if u have ideas hit me up on discord thank u for coming to my mouse talk
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newstfionline · 3 years ago
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Sunday, September 19, 2021
In edgy Washington, police outnumber Jan. 6 protesters (AP) In a city still on edge after the Jan. 6 insurrection, law enforcement bore down in large numbers on the Capitol on Saturday over concerns that a rally in support of the jailed rioters would turn violent. It didn’t. The crowd was sparse and incidents were few. The low turnout called into question whether such rallies will have any staying power as the organizers attempt to tap into the rage of Jan. 6 without the presence of the former president. Law enforcement had prepared for a confrontation by erecting temporary fencing around the Capitol and deploying heavy dump trucks to ring the rally site. Local police departments and the U.S. National Guard were on standby.
Crews watching weather as wildfire burns near sequoias (AP) Crews were watching the weather this weekend as they battled California wildfires that have burned into some groves of gigantic ancient sequoias as they try to protect the world’s largest tree. The National Weather Service issued a weather watch for critical fire conditions in the Sequoia National Park in the Sierra Nevada, where the Colony Fire was burning about a mile from Giant Forest, a grove of 2,000 giant sequoias. Firefighters have wrapped the base of the General Sherman Tree in fire-resistant aluminum of the type used in wildland firefighter emergency shelters and to protect historic wooden buildings, fire spokeswoman Rebecca Paterson said. The General Sherman Tree is the largest in the world by volume, at 52,508 cubic feet (1,487 cubic meters), according to the National Park Service. It towers 275 feet (84 meters) high and has a circumference of 103 feet (31 meters) at ground level.
Official: US to expel Haitians from border, fly to Haiti (AP) The Biden administration plans the widescale expulsion of Haitian migrants from a small Texas border city by putting them on flights to Haiti starting Sunday, an official said Friday, representing a swift and dramatic response to thousands who suddenly crossed the border from Mexico and gathered under and around a bridge. Details are yet to be finalized but will likely involve five to eight flights a day, according to the official with direct knowledge of the plans who was not authorized to discuss the matter publicly and spoke to The Associated Press on condition of anonymity. U.S. authorities closed traffic to vehicles and pedestrians in both directions at the only border crossing in Del Rio, Texas, after chaos unfolded Friday and presented the administration with a new and immediate challenge as it tries to manage large numbers of asylum-seekers who have been reaching U.S. soil. U.S. Customs and Border Protection said it was closing the border crossing with Ciudad Acuna, Mexico, “to respond to urgent safety and security needs.” Travelers were being directed to Eagle Pass, Texas, 57 miles (91 kilometers) away.
Argentina Crisis Deepens as Vice President Blasts Fernandez (Bloomberg) Argentina’s powerful Vice President Cristina Fernandez de Kirchner slammed President Alberto Fernandez in an open letter, heightening the political crisis that has roiled the government since it lost an election Sunday. Kirchner, who governed Argentina from 2007 to 2015, published a letter Thursday blaming Fernandez for a “political catastrophe” she says was caused by his economic strategy. Their coalition’s loss in the Sept. 12 midterm primary vote was largely due to the government’s mistaken policy of fiscal austerity, she said, adding pressure on Fernandez to ramp up spending. The crisis blows open the political divide between the two factions: Kirchner and the radical Peronist officials close to her; and Fernandez’s more moderate cabinet allies. With no access to international credit markets, the government cannot easily heed Kirchner’s calls to ramp up spending without the central bank printing money and worsening one of the world’s highest inflation rates.
Dutch are world’s tallest people—but they’re shrinking, study shows (Guardian) It is, perhaps, with just a hint of satisfaction that the Dutch office for national statistics has confirmed that the men and women of the Netherlands remain the tallest people on the planet. But the government’s statisticians have had cause to report a further potentially humbling twist: the Dutch are shrinking. For the last six decades, the people of the lowlands have stood imperiously at the top of the world height league table, with the latest data suggesting the average 19-year-old man stood at just over 6ft tall (182.9cm) in 2020, while women born in the same year measured in at 5ft 6 in (169.3cm). The finding by the Centraal Bureau voor de Statistiek (CBS), a government institution, means the Netherlands maintains its lofty spot, which it has held since 1958. But based on surveys of 719,000 people aged 19 to 60, the CBS has had to report that after a period of stagnation and now clear contraction, Dutch men born in 2001 are on average 1cm shorter than the generation born in the Netherlands in 1980, and Dutch women are 1.4cm smaller.
Afghan chaos leads to resignations and reshuffling—in Europe (Washington Post) After a majority of the Dutch parliament affirmed this week that the government had mishandled evacuations from Afghanistan after the Taliban takeover, Sigrid Kaag said she had only one option: resign as foreign minister. On Friday, Kaag was followed by another member of the Dutch cabinet, Ank Bijleveld. The defense minister released her own statement of resignation, noting that she could “no longer adequately take responsibility for my people” amid the criticism. The moves in the Netherlands are another sign of how the collapse of the Afghan government, preceded by the Biden administration’s decision to withdraw all remaining U.S. troops from the country, appears to be causing more disruption in European capitals than in Washington. In Britain, Prime Minister Boris Johnson reshuffled his cabinet this week—demoting ally Dominic Raab from foreign secretary, one of the highest political positions in the United Kingdom, and reassigning him as justice secretary. Much of the criticism of government action in Europe has focused on the slow and chaotic reaction to the fall of Kabul and the ensuing scenes at the city’s airport.
Fearful US residents in Afghanistan hiding out from Taliban (AP) Every night in yet another house in Afghanistan’s capital, a U.S. green card-holding couple from California take turns sleeping, with one always awake to watch over their three young children so they can flee if they hear the footsteps of the Taliban. They’ve moved seven times in two weeks, relying on relatives to take them in and feed them. Their days are an uncomfortable mix of fear and boredom, restricted to a couple of rooms where they read, watch TV and play “The Telephone Game” in which they whisper secrets and pass them on, a diversion for the children that has the added benefit of keeping them quiet. All of it goes on during the agonizing wait for a call from anybody who can help them get out. They tried and failed to get on a flight and now are talking to an international rescue organization. Through messages, emails and phone conversations with loved ones and rescue groups, AP has pieced together what day-to-day life has been like for some of those left behind after the U.S. military’s chaotic withdrawal -- that includes U.S. citizens, permanent U.S. resident green-card holders and visa applicants who aided U.S. troops during the 20-year war. Those contacted by AP -- who are not being identified for their own safety -- described a fearful, furtive existence of hiding in houses for weeks, keeping the lights off at night, moving from place to place, and donning baggy clothing and burqas to avoid detection if they absolutely must venture out.
Photos show North Korea expanding uranium enrichment plant (AP) Recent satellite images show North Korea is expanding a uranium enrichment plant at its main Yongbyon nuclear complex, a sign that it’s intent on boosting the production of bomb materials, experts say. The assessment comes after North Korea recently raised tensions with its first missile tests in six months amid long-dormant nuclear disarmament negotiations with the United States. “The expansion of the enrichment plant probably indicates that North Korea plans to increase its production of weapons-grade uranium at the Yongbyon site by as much as 25%,” Jeffrey Lewis and two other experts at Middlebury Institute of International Studies at Monterey said in a report.
Amazon adds tuition for workers (The Week) Amazon last week became the latest large employer to offer free college as a workplace perk, said Annie Palmer at CNBC. The e-commerce giant said "it will cover the cost of tuition, fees, and textbooks for hourly employees in its operations network after 90 days of employment," with the benefit applying to "hundreds of educational institutions across the country." Amazon said it will also cover "high school diploma programs, GEDs, and English-as-a-second-language certifications." More companies are dangling educational benefits as a lure for hiring and retaining workers amid an increasingly competitive labor market. Walmart said in July it would fully subsidize tuition and books for 1.5 million part-time and full-time employees, and expanded its college partners. Target, Chipotle, and Starbucks have made similar commitments.
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therobotmonster · 5 years ago
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I fed a computer Transformers bios, and it gave me metal madness.
There’s this website, called talktotransformer.com, which takes text as a prompt to complete a passage using a neural network. I decided to feed it different sized chunks of Transformers toy bios.
Starting with Frenzy (bold is the original prompt, the rest is what the computer generated::
If Frenzy needed to breathe, war would be his oxygen. He knows no cause, only craves to spread fear and destruction. It is this very same compulsion that drove him to the brink of another catastrophic conflict: why else would he fight all those years ago? And his example is everywhere; his assassin, to his nation's debt, rode into battle at the head of his Stormraggers. This man was the heart and soul of war – the embodiment of absolute, unadulterated rage, his shield protected by the charge of raw fury that claimed millions, drove his enemies back to the edge of annihilation and forever changed the course of history
I mean, damn, that’s some slightly meandering but hardcore package fodder there. Lets see what happens with the first two lines of Hound’s bio:
Hound loves the natural wonders of Earth, prefers it to Cybertron. Brave, fearless, loyal. Secretly desires to be human. Is told that he's as very human as possible and that Cybertronian is his body language. Loves pampering, repainting, and replicating other things, such as Rodeo. Packrat and Dogfight are in prison, unable to cause more harm. "He's decided to let himself be dragged away by the growing throes of his madness, and to let Nautica put an end to it."
At the Rogue Moon base, Bumblebee is confronted by a prison guard. However, after Bumblebee manages to defeat him, the guard is distracted by Rattrap, who asks the guard if they've been seen at the site. The guard finds them; Rattrap leads him to the prison.
Apparently, just a mention of Cybertron is enough to get the computer wiling away on fanfic. It originally stopped mid-sentence at “the guard is distracted by” but I had to see how it ended.
Now, lets see what happens with less, taking just the first line from Soundwave’s bio:
It is said Soundwave can hear a fly sneeze. During his battle with Icebreaker, Soundwave uses his bulk to get close and from this, he is able to hear everything Icebreaker's opponent does. This technique works better for him since, despite his size and his "boring" personality, he is incredibly powerful. In Transformers: Dark of the Moon, after he had his head chopped off by Icebreaker, Soundwave reattached it using a machine inside of his head and he has been able to function since. Soundwave is extremely brave and courageous, and enjoys very much giving verbal commands. In Transformers: Dark of the Moon, Soundwave dived into the sea to investigate evidence of corrupted technology that led to Unicron breaking free.
What appears to be a wiki article from a universe where Dark of the Moon was a very different movie. Lets see what happens with a quote. Like Optimus Prime’s:
"Freedom is the right of all sentient beings." "I love life and I'm happy that humanity can achieve its highest potential. That's why I want to become a plant. I want to serve my life's purpose and that is to help others with a compassion beyond human comprehension." "The human body is the best tool to grow a plant. The plant can achieve its own evolution through the bodies of humans. This is the ultimate transformation that can happen." "Some people say the planet has been cleansed of pollution. This is a lie, there is still pollutants in the atmosphere."
Plant cult literature. Okay. That’s normal. Perhaps a year two staple... Kickback?
Charming, but cruelly clever... makes friends so he can influence them to do his bidding by digging up facts he can hold against them. Delicately attuned to their own conditions of existence, fables and fairytales are complex incantations which tap into ancient cycles of purpose that offer answers for the great questions of life and death. Friends and enemies alike will listen to the points they believe the characters will advance. But not for long - their instinct is to push them in a different direction, and everything's going to change again...
Okay, the back copy of a Grant Morrison young adult novel. One more... Grimlock’s, taken from the first line of his bio:
Most fearsome and powerful Dinobot.  Seems he's the big, bad dinosaur from the missing film.  In fact, it appears he was even implied to be the one who cut the baby Predacon in half with his hydro-pistol.  The autobot's primary weapon seems to be his tusks, used to lash Predacon's rear end to a wall. 1.14  The Dinobots Brrrr... Another class of redeco kit we'd like to see is some death metal Dinobots.  The  movie Dinobots all seem to lean towards the brutal '80s style.  There was a T-Rex that looked like he was trying to kick someone's ass.
Pure Poetry.
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springbudeyes · 4 years ago
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Part One
As far as you know, you’re on the leading edge of time. No one has gone farther into the future than where you stand. No one knows what's next. Isn’t that paralyzing? How do you move with the knowledge that nothing you do has been tested? Sure, the past gives some data, but how do you really know that space itself won’t unravel with your next step? In fact, it’s a miracle that it hasn’t. On the other hand, you’re a pioneer. How could you not move, given this golden opportunity? You’re at war with yourself, grinding your gears. How could you move? How could you not? Courage, then panic. Withdrawal, then guilt. Maybe, you suppose, you’re a terrible person simply for shrinking from the catastrophe of existence. Or maybe it’s common sense, you rationalize. How could anyone made of anything but tempered steel contend with a world like this?
You start noticing people. Among thousands, you find exceptions. He did it. She did it. How? Why? Was it greed? Blind ambition? Unshakeable confidence? Where’d they get it? How can you get it? Long ago, you had something of the sort. You were a child with great potential. Your parents said so. Then your body grew and you became an adult with the mind of a child. Your mind was supposed to grow with your body. What happened? You torture yourself, sifting through memories. You still have the spark. The potential is there, but it’s rotten and you’re not sure you can heal the infection before the precious bud is destroyed. You don’t know how to nurse it back to health and make it bloom before life gets the better of you. Life is nothing like you expected. People are cruel. Even small setbacks hurt more than they should. Year after year, they hurt worse. Has anyone ever healed themselves before? Well, sure. You’ve heard the stories of down-and-out people getting back on their feet, despite having every reason to lie down and die. Such people are blessed, you assume. They must have gotten a revelation from God. So why haven’t you? Or maybe – it dawns on you – they just had the grit to gut out the climb. That’s a thought you don’t like to entertain. Is your goal even worth that much Hell? You start to question your goal. How clear was it to begin with? Compared to all the other children, how prodigious were you, really? Compared to the millions of competent adults around you, how qualified can you possibly be? Why should the world want what you have to offer when there are so many who can do a similar thing, better? You know enough to say, “a similar thing,” not “the same thing.” You know the rarity of your gift. Even so, what does it matter? Who needs your uniqueness when there are better uniquenesses? You can think of a handful of people whose lives you’ve affected. Maybe some good will come from it. Stones dropped in ponds make ripples. In that light, maybe you’ve already done everything you need to do. But you’re alive. You’re still in your body and you still feel that spark, that bud nestled in your soul. You have an obligation to serve it. You have a job to do. So you do it, begrudgingly. You’re a nihilist wearing a mask of optimism. You do the work and it comes out hollow. It comes out rotten at times. You know why. You don’t tell them why. You pretend you’re advancing. You pretend you’re getting closer to the goal, to freedom, to recovery. That’s as far as you’ve gotten. You’re still waiting on that revelation. The mountain is too high to climb, so you’re going to need wings. Nonetheless, you keep hiking, ducking into every shelter, sometimes resting too long. While the sun shines, you lie in bed, gestating. By the time you’re ready, the storms have rolled in. You pace, restless. You’ve missed the opening. This is how it goes. You’re wasting valuable time. Time, that thing you’re on the leading edge of. You can’t come back from it and you can’t see past it. Time carries you and all existence on its breeching wave, a wave that will soon crash to shore. And everything will go quiet. Maybe that’s what you want. Quiet. A bed of sand, a lapping tide. It never gets old, the thought of ending it all. You could. You’d have every right to do so. You’d merely be putting an end to the wait. You really are a nihilist. But you keep climbing, holding out for that revelation, praying to be proven wrong. Then, something happens. A person who has received a ripple of your work sends a playful splash in your direction. You join hands under the sun. You talk of everything that went wrong and everything that went right. Time marches on. Your job doesn’t get easier, but now you have a fellow spark to encourage. You feel something changing. It’s hard to say if you’re healing or getting worse. Some days you swear your body could give out. Others, you think you could leap to the moon. Your friend informs you that they’ve peered inside your chest. You ask them what they’ve seen. It’s your spark, they say. From all the filth and grime, a single white petal has emerged. You never would have known. It’s almost as if your friend has seen the future. You have a new job. You have to figure out what you did to make that petal appear. Was it simply the arrival of your friend? Do you need more friends? You try it, but you've already seen where that leads. Only a certain kind of soul can reach you.  Maybe something pushed aside the grime, eased the inflammation, and made way for growth. Maybe it was that long train of conversations. Maybe, in particular, it was the discussion of what went wrong. You ask your friend what else they see. They see darkness. They see sin. You’ve hurt others and yourself. You’re not just a victim. You’re a perpetrator, an accomplice. You’re responsible.  You’re responsible. For what? Surely not everything. You can’t bear the consequence of every evil act you’ve committed. That’s too much for anyone to bear. But now, others have to carry it instead. The thought of it adds weight to your daily toil. So how do you make up for this? There’s a whole world of hurt below the mountain. You stop climbing. You descend back into the valley and embark on a journey of apologies.  When you’ve made all the mends you can – or at least, all you’re willing to – you’re left with the damage to yourself. That, of all your sins, will be the hardest to forgive. You assess the situation. How much time, precisely, have you lost? How many years have you cut off your life? How many months, days, hours, and minutes are you currently squandering? What relationships should you have kept? What promises should you not have broken? What leads should you have pursued? What doors should you have left closed? What battles should you have fought and what battles should you have allowed yourself to lose? Why did you shirk responsibility, leaving it all heaped up for this wretched moment? How did you become the rotten grown-up child that you are?  Your revelation has arrived and it’s not pretty. Perhaps, now, you have something of a lens to your past. It’s murky and chipped, but it’s the best you’re going to get between you and your observant companion. If you wanted, you could write an autobiography, but how pretentious would that be? Anyway, now what? Since you’ve twisted up your life beyond repair, why not go through with that idea that never gets old? Your friend squeezes your hand and reminds you of the ripples that led them to you. The mountain still waits, they say, and you still have power left in your stride. Why not see how high the two of you can go together? You feel weak and ashamed. What if you didn’t have an ally to go the distance with you? Some don’t. What about them? What will they do? They might be alone because of you. Who are you to rise? Who are you to be satisfied? If you do turn your back on the valley and climb higher than ever before, who’s to say some vengeful ghost won’t take the opening, split you down the middle, and feed your corpse to the world? You haven’t left too many of those, you hope. Whether by tragedy or malevolence, you couldn’t bear to fail. You relive that fear of space unraveling. If you could see the future and know the time and place of your dream’s demise, the wait might be easier. You could prepare. Perhaps you could change fate. And if you could see triumph at the peak, you would sprint straight upslope. You would move, if only you could see. The best foresight you have is in the eyes of your friend, who knows you better than you know yourself. Again, you bare your chest and ask them what they see. The petal has been swallowed by a snake. You can’t believe what you’ve heard. Days later, you start to feel it. Not just in your soul, but in your body, something is deeply wrong. The rot spreads. Illness creeps in. Day after day you succumb to fatigue, anxiety, and despair.  “What is the snake?” you ask. Is it karma coming back to bite you? Were your sins too great to be absolved? Your friend says it’s simpler. You’ve spent too long in the world below. There is a system by which all living beings operate. Behavioral psychologists call it the dominance hierarchy. Every creature is placed on a rung in a social ladder. A counter in your brain, older than humanity itself, detects which rung you’re on. If you’re on the bottom, the counter knows and makes you suffer. The longer you spend there, the worse it gets. Your pain grows especially acute when the gap between your desired position and your current standing is wide. Like a psychological pregnancy, the greater the dream, the greater the agony until the dream is born into reality. When the pain passes a certain threshold, your spirit will begin to eat itself alive. The gap between your dream and reality couldn’t be wider. There’s a whole Heaven of possibilities you haven’t tapped. Until you reach the peak of that mountain, there will be no respite for your soul. That’s what you conclude, for now.
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