#tamar x y/n

[sapphicsaints]

What if reader was Nikolai’s sister who’s in a relationship with Tamar and when they’re at sea they can actually be together but on land they can’t because it’s forbidden, maybe a jealousy one where her parents are pushing reader into an arranged marriage.

princesses get what they want

Tamar x Reader

Word Count: ~2.3k

Summary: “I’ll figure it out. Princesses are used to getting what they want.” 

“Oh and am I something you want?” Her eyes glimmered with a challenge.

A/N: Thank you so much for the request! I had fun writing this.

I was pissed when Nikolai said no to me accompanying them on the whaler. But he had a point - it’s too risky to have both of us together, to chance the Darkling recognizing us. Tailoring only went so far. We can’t shake the mannerisms we share, even the crew suspect we’re related, although they don’t know our true identities. Plus, it would be a shame for Ravka to lose both of their spares in one go. 

“I can’t trust you not to snap back at the Grisha.” He didn’t face me, still stood pouring over a map. 

My eyes narrowed. “Can’t trust me?” 

His head snapped over his shoulder. “You know as well as I do that your attitude can be … volatile.” 

I scoffed. “I have self control.” 

“Do you not remember the fight you got in with the Grisha children? How did that end last time?” 

“With a few bruised egos.” I laughed at the memory. Nikolai didn’t laugh. I’d caused quite the headache, and he’d been the one to explain it to my mother. 

Tamar snickered from the corner and I shot her a glare. She’s not helping the situation. 

--

I couldn’t help the relief I felt when Tamar returned safe, nor the anger when Nikolai announced she’d be sharing quarters with the Sun Summoner. I dragged him away to have a quiet, but heated exchange. 

“You didn’t bother to ask me before kicking me out of my room?” I hissed. 

“There’s a better room for you.” He tried to soothe. 

“Oh you know that’s not the reason.” 

He winced, looking around for someone to come interrupt. I poked a finger into his chest. “You owe me one.” He nodded before waving Privyet over, I took that as my chance to leave and find Tamar. 

I intercepted her on her way back up to get her rations. “Did you agree to this before?” I asked through clenched teeth. 

“I found out when you did.” She shrugged. 

“You’re not upset?” 

“Of course I am.” She said, with a tone of surprise, “But I can’t question him in front of everyone.” 

I sighed, she has a point. “I’m stealing you for a few hours.” I said, before dragging her back down, she laughed. 

--

“Are you excited to be back?” Alina asked as we walked into our lodgings for the night.

I looked at her, it was a genuine question. “I’d rather be anywhere else.” I answer drily. Tolya chuckled behind me. 

“Why?” She pushed. 

I sighed, not in annoyance, but explaining the situation might make it a bit more real than I want to. 

“Come on,” I said, and tugged her up the stairs towards our room. I shut the door and sat on the windowsill, motioning for her to take a seat. She sat on my bed, looking vaguely uncomfortable. The door opened again, Tamar walked in and leaned against it. I didn’t pay much attention to her, it would hurt too much to look at her now, and to explain this. Before she could say anything I started explaining. 

“Once we get back, they’re going to start trying to marry me off.” Alina glanced toward Tamar, her expression stony. I couldn’t meet her eyes. “And I love being called a bastard.” 

Alina’s eyes widened. I’m sure she’d heard the rumors, but confirmation is another thing entirely. 

I chuckled darkly, “Mother couldn’t stay away from the Kaelish.” There was a bite in my voice, an edge. “Isn’t it obvious?” I said, waving my hand over my face. Neither of the women in the room commented, Tamar already knew but Alina seemed in shock. I pushed myself up from my seat, heading to the door. I stopped a few paces away, turning my head over my shoulder.  

“I love my brother, but do yourself a favor and don’t marry him. Court is fucked up, you don’t want to be involved any more than you have to be Sun Summoner.”

I brushed past Tamar, “Always the dramatics” she whispered in my ear. I rolled my eyes but walked out. Hopefully she wasn’t on guard duty tonight, and I could steal her for a few hours. 

“You like it.” I said, and closed the door behind me. I heard her talking to Alina behind me, but didn’t reply. My shoulders sagged as I walked out the door. I felt it coming back - the burden. I didn’t like it. 

--

“You’ve finally returned.” Mother kissed both of my cheeks and I had to fight the urge to cringe back. 

“Did you not get any of our summons?” She asked. 

“They must’ve been lost.” I replied, my voice a bit distant. The tone I'd always adopted at home. I saw Tamar glance at me out of the corner of my eye, but I didn’t dare look back. If there was a mirror nearby I'd have been able to see the mask that slowly set in place, the hardness that settled in behind my eyes. It’s a shame how quickly old habits settle back in. One glance at Nikolai, and I saw it on him. My eyes narrowed as I watched Vasily sitting next to ‘father’. The hatred that swarmed through my body threatened to burst through, the one who’d made my life living hell growing up. The tension must’ve been palpable because I felt Nikolai’s hand on my shoulder. 

“It’s been a long journey.” He said, “We’ll settle in and return for dinner.” He steered me out of the room, hand on my shoulder, and I caught Tamar’s eye on the way out. I winked at her, and to her credit she didn’t break face - but I saw the amused glint in her eyes. At least one of us found it funny. It didn’t escape our parents' attention that we didn’t ask to be dismissed, that we left. It was a subtle threat - that we could leave again if we wanted to. 

“Did we really have to come back?” I muttered to Nikolai as we walked out of the throne room. 

“The walls have ears.” He replied, and I sealed my mouth shut. “We’ll talk later.” He finished, dropping me off at my room. I forced a smile on my face as servants began fluttering in and out, all but shoving me straight into the bath.

--

I agreed to meet her, just past sundown, on the grounds. She said there’s something she wants to show me. Sneaking past my guards and all of the servants dotting around too a bit of effort - and a little bit of blind faith, jumping out of the window into the soft bushes. 

I landed with a grunt, and heard laughter coming from across the lawn. My eyes narrowed and I saw a figure running towards me. Her. She’s supposed to meet me somewhere else completely. I’m struggling out of the bushes when her hand appears in front of me. I considered batting it away but ended up taking it and let her heave me to my feet, dragging me out of the bushes. I cross my arms to glare at her. 

“You weren’t supposed to be anywhere near here.” 

She laughed, a grin spreading across her face. The grin I love so much. “I couldn’t miss seeing the princess land in the bushes.” 

“How’d you know I’d take the window? I could’ve snuck through the halls.”

“Past all the guards Nikolai has stationed?” She laughed again. “You’re good, but you wouldn’t have made it past the first set of doors before someone told him.” 

I rolled my eyes. She has a point. Her eyes scan the surrounding area before she pulls me right into a tight hug. I squeeze back, holding on as long as I can. Eventually she untangles herself from me and kisses my forehead. 

“I’ve missed you.” She murmurs, holding me back at the shoulders. 

“I wish we could see each other more.” 

Her hands drop, one taking mine instead. I took this for granted at sea, being with each other publicly, without any fears. “Let’s go for a walk.” She said instead. 

We took the long way around the gardens. The silence felt tense for once, normally it was comfortable - easy. 

“Mother wants me to start meeting suitors.” I said, my voice low. I saw Tamar’s shoulders tense. 

“How do you feel about that?” She replied. 

I stopped and turned to face her. “What do you think?” 

“How am I supposed to know?” Maybe the hurt showed through my eyes because her eyes softened and she wrapped me up in another hug. “We knew this would happen.”

“I’ll fight it. I’ll find a way.” She hummed, like she didn’t believe me, but I would. I would find a way to get out of this, somehow. 

“I’m jealous.” 

That came as a surprise. It shouldn’t have. 

“Why?” I regretted the question as soon as it left my lips. “Nevermind.” I said quickly, covering my tracks. “What do you want to show me?” 

She placed a soft kiss on my lips before taking my hand again and smiling, dragging me towards the stables. We stood around the outside edge, in the shadows, watching the fights. We quietly placed bets on the fighters - I lost a fair bit of money, not that it really mattered to me. It reminded me of the Volkvolny - and she knew it. 

“Think any of them would fight me?” I asked. 

She laughed, “Not if they know who you are.” 

“Let’s get Genya to tailor me.” I said, my practically bouncing on my feet. “Tomorrow.” 

“And how are we going to explain who you are?” 

“I’ll figure it out. Princesses are used to getting what they want.” 

“Oh and am I something you want?” Her eyes glimmered with a challenge. I took a quick look around, nobody was paying attention, and dragged her to a corner. 

“Anyone can see.” She hissed “I know this place better than anyone.” I winked at her before dragging her off to a hidden corner on the grounds. 

I made Tamar a lot of money the next night, and pissed Tolya off. He figured it out after the first three fights, and dragged me back towards the Grand Palace, Tamar laughing her ass off in tow. Thankfully, she healed me, and nobody was none the wiser that they got their ass kicked by the Princess of Ravka. 

-- 

A party was thrown at the Grand Palace in honor of Nikolai’s birthday, and the Queen took it as an excuse to arrange some suitors to come visit. Tamar was on guard in the corner, the Sun Summoner attending. I faked some smiles, a few gentle touches on arms here and there. Too many dances with grubby hands. I was dancing with the son of a wealthy Kerch merchant when his hand drifted a bit too low. I firmly moved it back onto my waist, but caught Tamar’s face out of the corner of my eye - the look in her eyes made me gulp. She didn’t see me watching her, her eyes were narrowed on the man in front of me, waiting a few seconds too long before roaming the room again. I tried to catch her eye several times, even tried to stand next to her at one point, but it’s like she sensed me coming and moved before I could get close. I couldn’t fight the hurt and anger that slowly built up inside me. I’d go see her later tonight. I had too. 

I didn’t get that chance. Nikolai and I barely escaped with our lives - and I had the honor of dragging Baghra out of her cave. I fought in the infantry too, I thought I knew war, but shadow monsters that can’t be killed are something else entirely. The Darkling had changed the playing field completely, we were caught off guard, caught by surprise. I should have felt bad about Vasily being ripped to pieces, and part of me did, but the other was so angry that he put everything at risk for his own vanity, that I didn’t have space in my heart to mourn for him. 

I went back with him that night, and I saw no sign of her, no sign of anyone, just bodies littering the ground. No survivors in sight. I vomited that night for hours. Hidden away from everyone. She had to be alive, had to. I felt it, I would know if she was dead. Maybe it’s fake hope, but I clung to it like a lifeline. 

-- 

I didn’t expect anything special when Nikolai returned from the raid, he’d gone many times, and this is the one I decided to sit out, having been injured on the last. Of course the one I miss is the one Tamar showed up at. He conveniently forgot to tell me she’d been spotted at one of the smuggling stations. 

“I thought of you every day.” I said between kisses, hidden in one of many back hallways. 

“I did too.” She replied. 

“If you still want me.” Tamar went to interrupt, but I held up one hand. “Now that Nikolai’s King. There’s nothing stopping us.” 

Her head lowered, mouth moving to graze my ear. She didn’t answer my question directly. “Every time one of those men would put a hand on you. Every time you had to flirt back. I thought I'd explode.” She pushed me towards the wall, my back pressed against the stone cold. Tamar moved slowly, her hand tracing the side of my face, I leaned into her touch. “I couldn’t think of you the last few months. The idea that you might be dead. It was too painful.” 

I tilted my head to meet her eyes. “I knew you’d be alive.” I saw the confusion on her face. “I would’ve felt it if you died.” I held a hand up to my heart. It might be the cheesiest thing I've ever said, but the small smile on her face was worth it. I couldn’t handle it any longer, I grabbed her shoulders and pulled her in, pulled her into the kiss I’d been waiting months for. 

[infin1ty-garden]

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[depressedbagpipe]

A Heartrender's Fire: ch. III

Tolya Yul-Bataar x Lantsov!ofc

Words: 5199 Warnings: canon-typical violence and language, volcra, poor descriptions of grisha powers, grisha powers following the show's logic and not the one in the books, me making up names and titles. also justice for kovu cause the guy straight up disappeared mid-episode. also i don't speak ravkan (russian?) so let's pretend i know what I'm doing A/N: this took way too long because i essentially had a surgery performed on me last month and I'm *still* recovering. anyways, this is way too fun to write so don't worry, i am continuing this story. we're getting some backstories here, too, which i think is pretty neat.

Series Masterlist Previous chapter <> Next chapter

III: Like calls to like

The day woke up cloudy, but the spirits at the Volkvolny were as bright as the Sun Summoner’s light. Sturmhond had been preparing the ship for the trip to the Fold all morning, giving concise directions to the crew. Only a small group would be coming with him and his clients up in the air, and his sister quickly pointed out that she wasn’t staying behind, no matter how much her brother wanted to keep her safe on the ship while he returned to their homeland. 

“Anything happens on the Fold, you’ll need me,” she had argued, once again before Tamar and Tolya’s unimpressed faces.

“I have a Sun Summoner now. I think I’ll be fine.”

Ouch, Irina didn’t let the reaction show in her face. Tolya did feel her heart beat just a tad faster, though. Not that he was actively seeking her heartbeat out. He would often find himself listening unconsciously and could distinguish it from miles away. Not even metaphorically. 

“It’s my country too, Nikolai. Anything happens on the Fold, you’ll need me,” she repeated.

Sturmhond looked at his sister. Few times she ever addressed him with his name, right in the open, and he realized that no matter how much he wanted to keep his little sister away from danger, she would always find her way to it, face first, full charge.

“Fine,” he sighed. “You’re buying kvas later, though.”

“Deal.”

He still scowled when he took her in, smiling her victorious smile as she high-fived the twins, the three of them chattering amongst themselves as the ship took them closer to the black void that had haunted and fascinated the second prince for so long. Irina was fully aware of the danger, and despite her best efforts, a chill went through her spine at the thought of her first passage through the darkness, afraid, and alone. 

I have a Sun Summoner now. Sturmhond could lie to himself all he wanted, but his sister knew he was just as scared as her. Only now they had a living Saint with them, able to wield the power of two amplifiers and the hope of an entire nation. 

The Volkvolny sailed through the waves seemingly faster than ever. Irina almost wished the ship would stop and trap them on the sea forever, anything but returning to the one place she had been miserable at. No matter how many dirty taverns, war camps, and smelly docks she stepped on, the image of the Grand Palace was enough to fix a permanent frown on her otherwise peaceful manner.

But she was a big girl now. Whatever was waiting for her on the other side should fear her, too. She was powerful, not as much as Alina, or as intelligent as Nikolai, but she still had royal blood in her veins, which coincidentally pumped enough fire to bring down the whole palace with just a flick of her hand. She felt the warmth on her cheeks at the thought, and with a small smile, she looked up, finding Tolya’s gaze.

The giant was looking at her with an all-knowing grin, which she quickly replicated. He noticed her fingers had been absentmindedly tracing her own amplifier, barely taking it out of her clothes. He had noticed that little quirk of hers after she got it, almost a month into joining them on the crew. A failed smuggling operation on the Fjerdan border ended with Sturmhond almost decapitated by a wolf, and Irina melting the snow around them as she protected him from the pack that was sure to attack. Tolya had known Irina’s heart marched to a different beat than her brother’s, but it was only after seeing the flames around her body that he fully knew what was different about her. He had eyed her closely after that, always finding something new about her to stare at, from the way her eyes seemed to come alive in the sun and radiate warmth in the night. Or how she was grounding herself as her fingers danced down the wolf’s fang as if she too needed a reminder of the fire she carried in her soul. There were many things about Irina Lantsov that could be admired, according to Tolya. Not that he would ever tell her. 

Simultaneously, Alina was also stroking her wrists, feeling the amplifiers without looking up. Irina glanced at her, noticing the way her face lit up when Mal approached her again. For a second she longed for it, that love out in the open, despite the dire situation the young couple was in. Their conversation was soon cut short by her brother, perched nearby, waiting for his big entrance as he always did. His voice was loud, demanding, and powerful–everything he had been raised to be.

“Who says you’ll be on your own?” He raised his leg on a box and casually leaned up front. “I want a front-row seat to the light show, thank you very much. Plus, the King’s on the other side of the Fold, ergo, so is my payment.”

“We could definitely use your arsenal,” Mal reckoned.

“Maybe some kind of fortified carriage?” Alina thought.

“Carriage? Land travel is so boring. And that’ll take days!” Sturmhond walked away from them, giving Irina the silent indication she needed to brace herself for takeoff. “Come along! Prepare to decouple!”

Tolya and Tamar quickly jumped to the section, their faces glistening with anticipation.

“Kovu.” Sturmhond nodded at the Squaller behind Alina and Mal. He pulled the lever that engaged the sails. “Secondary mast released!” Kovu shifted the position of the sails so they stood horizontal to the ship, all of it under the astonished eyes of the Sun Summoner. “Engage secondary sail!”

And with another push upwards, the Hummingbird flew out of reach as the rest of the Volkvolny stayed on the water. Alina stumbled over to the wooden bench Irina had fallen asleep just a day prior and looked around in disbelief and fear as the air grew colder and purer the higher they flew in the sky. Tamar chuckled at the girl, enjoying the sight of the Sun Summoner scrambling to stay sitting. Even Irina grinned, feeling somewhat superior for a slight second.

Even the Sun Summoner feels fear.

She couldn’t help but comment. “It’s like watching a newborn discover the world.”

Tolya laughed, who had casually stood beside her, looking at the sea below them and enjoying the sight of the horizon. Irina felt a warmth in her cheeks that she was sure wasn’t because of the chill that settled around the Hummingbird. Instead of looking in Tolya’s direction, she faced her brother, who was also staring at Alina with amusement, only his eyes were kinder and curious, a sight Irina knew too well was only reserved for very few women out there. 

Yet Mal was the only one who got her to open her eyes and walk with her to the edge. Mal was the only one she trusted to catch her if she fell. Irina wondered what that would feel like, should the moment come. Who would come to her rescue, not for who she was, but because they cared about her. 

Kovu kept working the sails as they rapidly approached Ravkan soil, the sea blending with the land. Irina’s heart drummed in anticipation, looking back as they left the sea behind.

“How are you holding up?” Tolya suddenly spoke. He seemed nearer, their arms barely touching.

“Meh.”

He shook his head, his eyes shifting from the sky to the ground below them. “Why haven’t you told them about you being Grisha?” He lowered his voice. Irina looked around, sighing in relief once she saw her brother keeping his guests entertained. “It’s bound to happen, anyway.”

“And give away the big reveal? No way.” Irina scoffed, looking back at him for a second.

“Don’t be like your brother.” Tolya’s seriousness would’ve caught her off-guard, but she was used to his sudden tone changes. 

“I’m not like my brother. In fact, I’m better.”

“Something Sturmhond would say.”

“Something Ainthe would say, too,”

“See?”

“Shut up,” she giggled. He smiled too, missing the sound of her laugh. After the prior day’s events, he wouldn’t admit he would miss her laugh if she was gone. “Honestly, I don’t know. I’m so used to hiding amongst Ravkans… I can’t tell how they’ll react.”

“They’re good people.”

“How can you tell?”

“I happen to have a way with hearts.”

“You don’t say.”

“Captain! The Fold’s in sight!” Tamar called, effectively interrupting the banter between the two Grisha.

“Next stop, destiny.” 

“For Saint’s sake, Sturmhond,” Irina groaned. 

“What? I’m trying to add dramatic effect here.”

“We don’t need it.”

“Says who?”

“Says me.”

“Children.”

–·–

The Hummingbird entered the pit of darkness in complete silence. Thunder rumbled as the flying vessel tore through the barrier, and Irina took one last big gulp of fresh air before her body was completely surrounded by obscurity. Her eyes quickly adjusted to the black, and she released a silent breath, moving her head around as soon as she heard the first creature’s wail in the distance. Kovu kept the flying skiff afloat, his arms tiring but without complaint. Alina stood at the front, arms ready, while Irina gripped the ropes, looking wildly around. 

The crew seemed to gather behind Alina, with narrowed eyes, trying to find some hope to hold on to.

“I hate this place,” Mal commented in a low voice.

They all knew they had to be very silent if they wanted to make it out alive.

“Eh, it’s just a bit of pitch black and bloodthirsty monsters,” Sturmhond joked. He ignored the unimpressed faces of his clients and faced his family. “What’s not to love?”

He gladly received in his open palm his firearm which Tamar had thrown at him, never losing his mischievous smirk.

“Seems like a good day to kill some Volcra,” Tamar growled, getting her own weapons ready as well.

Tolya sighed. “I’d much rather a hot bath and a book of sonnets.”

Tamar stared at him in disbelief. Tolya was looking at the darkness with a longing look, picturing himself in the warm water, and Irina had to glance another way just to stop those thoughts from wandering elsewhere. She rolled the sleeves of her red coat up, her hands tense and ready to summon. Should Alina fail, she would become the first line of infantry. Irina stood next to Kovu, guarding the Squaller at the back while the rest of the team remained at the front.

“All good?” she asked the man, noticing the faint line of sweat on his forehead.

“Could be better,” he replied.

Irina sighed. “It won’t take much longer, don’t worry.”

“That’s not what I’m worried about.”

The girl couldn’t say anything else, for she too felt the tension rising with every passing second. She knew it hadn’t been that much time since they entered, but any time spent inside the Fold felt like an eternity. 

Alina stood up near the edge, and the light show quickly began. With heavy breathing, the Sun Summoner created a light barrier that first extended around the Hummingbird, and then expanded into the black void. Irina stared around in amazement, a hole opening itself in front of them where the ancient mountains of Tsibeya stood at the horizon, welcoming them home once more. Light and heat overwhelmed Irina as beams of light danced on Alina’s arms. 

The barrier only got bigger from then on, and just as they were about to exit on the other side of the hole Alina had opened, things spiraled down. Alina’s light flickered, her arms flailing wild as she tried to call on her power once again, but nothing responded.

“Alina!” Mal kept calling her, but whatever made her stop had also thrown her off on the deck, the protective barrier of light gone with her.

The Volcra didn’t take long. Their growling was near, angry and ferocious, as the last beams of light extinguished around them. The Fold swallowed them whole again, and Sturmhond didn’t waste any time.

“Kovu!” he yelled at the Squaller as he took some steps back. “Get us out!” he stood before his sister, guns ready.

Kovu quickly rearranged the sails, making the ship fly faster at his mercy. Irina’s relief was short-lived, for one of the haunting monsters was now perched right beside them, ready to launch itself at its first victim.

Sturmhond quickly fired his revolver at it, making it stand back. The twins stood at the rear of the ship, the five of them standing in a circle as they protected each other’s backs. With Alina still on the floor and Mal perched over her, they weren’t the primary victims of the giant creatures.

Another one tore the main overhead sail open and landed on the deck right in front of the twins, who quickly got to work to end the monster’s life. The skiff was tilting dangerously, having lost its main support to stay afloat, but Kovu was doing everything in his power to get them out of the Fold on the other side while keeping the Hummingbird in the air. Irina didn’t need to be a genius to know they would not last long.

Sturmhond helped Tolya with a shot to where the Volcra’s heart supposedly was, and the giant quickly cut its head off. Irina assessed the damage, noticing the big hole in the fabric right above her head. She saw Alina finally stand up, still looking out of it, and because Mal only had eyes for her, neither of them saw the monster that was coming at a rapid speed to them.

Alina barely had time to look up before Irina stood protectively over them, firing a big and scathing flare up towards it, almost bursting it into flames as it fell through the void, fire following the Volcra as it sunk deeper into the Fold. 

Irina smiled at the sight, her fingers itching for more, standing tall and proud at her own display of power under the stunned faces of Alina and Mal.

“You’re Grisha?”

“No time to explain, Sol Koroleva,” Irina said.

The Hummingbird hit the exit of the Fold with a strong thud, nothing in comparison with their previous smooth entrance. The ship kept descending, gaining speed as it did so. One of the engines didn’t survive the attack, and the smoke was quickly turning into a well-spread fire at the front of the skiff. Irina was almost sent back flying, and would have crashed into the ship’s barrier if it hadn’t been for Tolya’s extended arm, catching her and bringing her closer to him, pinning her to the same rope he was holding on to for dear life as gravity pulled the crew down.

“Kovu, begin descent!” Sturmhond called, balancing on two feet, even though there wasn’t much Kovu could do. “Brace yourselves for landing!”

They were hurtling straight to the ground, and the Squaller could only do so much to prevent them from crashing completely. Everybody was trying to grasp at anything that could keep them up, bracing for the incoming impact. Irina felt helpless once again, but she didn’t have time to feel sorry for herself, because, with another jolt, the Hummingbird finally crashed, sending everybody down on the ground, impacting with the walls as the ship swept along the flat land and continued forward. Tolya kept a hand on the rope and another slithered around Irina’s waist, keeping her in front of her as the ship continued in motion through the meadow. Irina could only count the seconds until the movement stopped, closing her eyes in a silent prayer. 

Fortunately for her, it wasn’t long before it did.

Everybody was grunting and breathing heavily. Irina felt the burn on her hand from groping the rope for dear life, but Tolya didn’t take his arm off her.

“Is everyone okay?” Sturmhond asked loudly, quickly getting up.

Irina felt Tolya’s arm tensing slightly before finally releasing her, going to check on his sister who was still panting but seemed otherwise fine. 

“You good?” Sturmhond asked Irina, placing a hand on her back as he checked for any injuries on the younger girl. 

She nodded. “Yeah. You?”

He nodded too. That was all confirmation they needed before they both jumped over the deck onto solid ground, assessing the damage.

“Another one gone.”

Irina frowned. “This one worked. It was the Volcra.”

“It’s always the Volcra.”

But none of them could even breathe in relief before a bugle blew nearby. A regiment of the First Army had so lovingly decided to welcome them back to their land, with raised firearms ready to shoot at them, and its Colonel walking up front in a menacing stance.

The twins didn’t even shudder at the sight.

“Well, looks like we’re about to enjoy a traditional Ravkan welcome,” Tolya joked. 

Irina smiled, feeling the air charging with her brother’s boastful ego, about to make his big entrance. Maybe she was a bit like her brother. Not that she would ever admit that.

“You’ve crossed illegally onto Ravkan soil. Identify yourselves,” the Colonel called.

Sturmhond jumped down, standing in front of his crew with a straight back. He took off his bag, giving it to Tolya. “I’ll handle this.”

Irina stood back, repressing a smile.

“What are you doing?” Alina whispered at him but shut up at the look Irina sent her. She hid back slightly behind Mal, mainly because she was still the country’s number one fugitive.

“Identify yourselves at once or be shot.”

“Have I really changed so much, Raevsky?” Sturmhond, very slowly, started undoing his blue captain coat, leaving behind his fake persona and embracing his birthright before the Colonel’s own eyes. “I know it’s been a number of years, but people swear I remain boyishly handsome.”

He was wearing his First Army uniform underneath, and just as the green attire caught the Colonel’s eyes, he smiled.

“It can’t be.”

Tolya was being used as a coat hanger by that point, with Nikolai Lantsov standing proud and tall, with a devilish grin as he walked closer to the regiment.

“Yes, it is.”

“Moi tsarevich,” Raevsky mumbled before kneeling, the rest of the troop doing the same. “My prince. We’d all but given up hope.”

Nikolai chuckled as he shook the Colonel’s hand. Raevsky didn’t waste any time and turned around, facing his regiment and presenting the prince with a boisterous speech.

“I present Nikolai Lantsov, Major of the 22nd Regiment, Soldier of the King’s Army, Grand Duke of Udova, and Second Son to his Most Royal Majesty, King Pyotr the Third, Ruler of the Double Eagle Throne,” the Colonel called.

Irina mouthed the titles as Raevsky went on, and even the twins shared impressed looks at the many names their fearless captain bore.

“You’ve got to be joking,” Mal whispered, both him and Alina frowning. 

“Saints.”

Nikolai continued. “And in your own words, as I recall, ‘the greenest and most useless grunt you ever had the misfortune of commanding.’”

“Now, that sounds like you,” Irina spoke out loud, only noticing her mistake when the Colonel’s eyes glanced at her, also opening wide as he kneeled once more.

“Moi tsarevicha.”

The regiment, once again, copied their Colonel, kneeling as she walked closer to her brother, already regretting the attention she was receiving, but knowing the longer she stood without saying a word about her identity, the harder it would get later.

“I, once again, present Irina Lantsov, Grand Duchess of Mydrov, and First Daughter to his Most Royal Majesty, King Pyotr the Third, Ruler of the Double Eagle Throne.”

Nikolai chuckled when he noticed his sister's discomfort. “Thought you could get away with it?”

She groaned before motioning the Colonel to stand up. He took a step forward and bent down to kiss her hand, while Irina forced a smile onto her face.

“At your service, Your Highness.”

“We wanted to return sooner, but not without her,” Nikolai looked back at Alina.

Irina grimaced, knowing what was coming.

“May I present my esteemed traveling companion, former cartographer and sometimes Saint, Alina Starkov!” he extended a hand towards her, yet looked back at Raevsky. 

His sister shook her head, seeing how Alina was taking fast steps towards her brother. Despite her protectiveness over him, she knew he had it coming.

“Sol Koroleva. We heard you were dead,” Colonel Raevsky spoke with fear evident in his face, but his words died as soon as Alina yelled.

“You lying bastard!”

The punch to Nikolai’s face was met with utmost silence. The sound of betrayal was too loud to say anything else in return.

–·–

“That was fun,” Tamar said as they rode toward the Spinning Wheel.

“It was terrible,” Irina groaned, closing her eyes momentarily.

“You looked so cute there, like all stiff and stuff, and all the soldiers in awe like ‘Saints, the princess’,” Tamar kept going.

“I didn’t know where to look anymore! Everything was so awkward.”

Tolya joined. “Were they curtsying the right way?”

Irina groaned. Tamar laughed. 

The twins loved teasing the princess about her royal status every time they were on Ravkan soil. And while Irina pretended she couldn’t stand their banter, she knew she wouldn’t last a day without it. 

“How long do you think she’ll be mad at him for?” Tolya wondered.

The three of them looked back at where the Sun Summoner ignored the prince, looking at everything except the blond next to him. The three of them rode at the front, followed a few feet away by Nikolai and Alina, the rear of the party finished by a brooding Mal and a silent Kovu. Alina was still ignoring Nikolai, and despite his best efforts, he couldn’t seem to get on her good side. 

“No one can stay mad at Nikolai for long, but she seems stubborn enough to try,” Irina commented. 

“You know what he’s planning, don’t you?” Tamar said as she looked ahead again, fixing her posture on her horse as she looked around, searching for anything dangerous that could find them on their route.

The princess nodded. “Yup.”

“And she’s not gonna like it.”

“Nope.”

Tamar groaned. “Did he tell you?”

Irina shrugged. “It wasn’t necessary. I always know what he’s thinking. I mean, when you grow up with him, it’s easy to read his mind. Heartrender or not,” she winked at her friend. 

“It reminds me of this poem by a Kerch author, about the bond between brothers–” Tolya started, but his sister interrupted him.

“Is he dead?”

Tolya stopped. “Yes?”

Tamar shrugged. “Then I don’t care. I only vibe with the living.”

“In which case, last time on Novyi Zem there was this street artist who…”

The three of them continued with their playful chatter as their party rode on, leaving behind Raevsky’s regiment and the Fold. The Spinning Wheel was already in sight, and Irina felt a shiver set permanently in her bones as she gazed at the fortified mountain. She had spent years sneaking up there with her brother, perfecting her techniques, helping him build the place from the ground just to create something that would somehow resemble her ways. It had been her personal sanctuary once, and it was now full of Grisha displaced by General Kirigan’s torment and greed. Irina wasn’t truly the patriot that her older brother was, she too felt the tug in her heart at the thought of all the families that had suffered at the mercy of a pointless war, and the generations of both Grisha and Otkazat’sya that had been divided by the envy of the few. Her own life had been a constant lie because of it. And she was about to face it all over again, no matter how much she had convinced herself that she wouldn’t ever have to.

Those thoughts lasted long enough to reach the Spinning Wheel. Irina was still frowning as she got off her horse but forced a relaxed grin as soon as her brother appeared next to her.

“Welcome to the Spinning Wheel. My inventions workshop. It’s become something of a refuge for Grisha,” Nikolai spoke, introducing the place to Alina. He made sure to wink at his sister at the last bit of information, which the Sun Summoner clearly caught.

“Is that why you care so much? Because of her?” Alina asked the prince.

He simply shrugged, suddenly not caring about boosting his ego further. He looked at his sister, who was looking at him with a knowing smile.

“She’s my family above all. And as I already told you, you do what you have to do to protect the people you love.”

Irina shook her head, yet warmth spread across her chest. Nikolai finding out about her being able to summon fire had been an accident, much in the same way she found out. They were both playing outside the Grand Palace borders, sneaking around their older brother, their nanny, and the two guards who followed the small party into the outer world, as the princess liked to call it. The storm found them sitting on top of a tree, and suddenly, Vasily and the rest of their chaperones were running towards the palace again, leaving the two lesser children to fend for themselves. Nikolai was gripping Irina’s hand tightly as they made their way down and followed the path they had taken out of the woods when lightning struck a nearby tree and cut it in half. The trunk was about to crush them when the girl raised her hands in a terrified scream, and the next thing she knew, a huge chunk of ash was dissolving into thin air. Nikolai, wide-eyed and drenched, only took his sister’s hand once again and ran with her back to the palace. Without saying a word they sneaked past the guards at the entrance and escorted her to her quarters, helping her dry off. He sat her near her chimney, and with a silent nod, they both agreed no one ever would know about it. When she woke up the next day, Baghra was sitting by the window in her room, looking at the poor unfortunate royal soul with a sad expression on her pale, aging face.

–·–

“We’ve received accounts of First Army units found massacred, here, here, and here,” Nikolai pointed at the map. The improvised war room stood on one of the balconies overlooking the main entrance, and his most trusted advisors –namely, his sister, Alina, and Mal–, looked down as his fingers traced the old ink on the yellowing parchment.

“Too far from the border to be Shu incursions,” Mal commented.

“Or Fjerdan.” Alina kept her hands close to her, her hands almost itching to touch the intricate patterns on the paper, suddenly missing her simple life as a cartographer, before the entire world fell down on her shoulders.

“There’s good evidence that these units were holding Grisha captive. Some reports say soldiers were mutilated. Some… cut in half.”

Alina sighed. “It’s Kirigan, isn’t it.” But she didn’t even have to ask to know the answer.

“We haven’t been able to find his base camp–”

Mal shook his head in disbelief. “There’s no way he survived the Fold.” 

“He survived it before,” Alina cut him off. “Besides, he’s the only one who can do the Cut. Baghra, yes, but this is him.”

Irina shuddered at the mention of her old teacher. The only Grisha who knew about her back at Os Alta. The only one who never treated her as a porcelain vase, but instead built her up to become strong and fierce in her abilities. With a frown, the princess realized she had missed the old hag. She could only pray the General had spared her.

“If he’s alive, it’s only a matter of time before word reaches him about your attempt in the Fold,” Nikolai voiced it carefully, but his statement stung Alina.

“‘Attempt,’” she repeated. 

“No disrespect meant.”

“No, you’re right. That’s what it was. An attempt,” she still sounded defeated. “You three saw my light. It was… strong and angry and dangerously off-kilter. I can try to master what I have, but I’m afraid it won’t be enough.”

“We need to find the third amplifier,” Mal finished for her.

“The firebird,” Irina spoke, surprise laced in her tongue. 

Nikolai stepped away from the table, turning around as if to follow his train of thought, his head orchestrating their next steps as they continued the meeting.

“The more we search for it, we are at the mercy of your protection in this country.”

Alina searched Irina’s eyes, desperate to get her point across. And Irina already knew what her brother was about to say.

“Well, until then, a proposal.” Nikolai turned around. Irina closed her eyes. “We can try to stop this country from falling apart and tell the Fjerdans to shove their bounty up their ass in the process.”

“And how do you propose we do that?” Alina asked.

“I bring you under the wing of the Royal Family, our name becomes a shelter to you, and a banner under which we can enact change.”

Mal frowned. “Your name?”

Nikolai nodded. Irina shook her head.

“Wait,” Alina caught on. “This is a ‘proposal’ proposal. You’re suggesting marriage.”

Mal looked ready to throw himself off the balcony at that point, whereas Alina seemed she was going to be sick any second from then on.

“Alina, I’m not proposing a love match. Just a political alliance of Grisha and Otkazat’sya.”

“Well, that’s just what royal marriages are, aren’t they? Strategy,” Mal was looking everywhere but the future royal couple.

“Precisely. Maybe we never get to marriage. An engagement signals a strong commitment to cooperation and it will allow us to enact meaningful change for Grisha and Ravka,” Nikolai explained. 

“Don’t you have a Grisha sister, too?”

“Leave my sister out of this, Mal.”

Irina stepped forward. “Mal, I know Nikolai’s plan sounds crazy but it’s our safest bet. Nobody knows about me being a Summoner and the court will not take likely to the revelation. There’s never been a Grisha on the Ravkan throne and I certainly will never be the first one.”

“I’ve seen what you both mean to each other. I understand if you decline, but I hope you weigh the options and consider the benefits,” Nikolai nodded his head in silent farewell, and both royal siblings left the couple to talk it out.

On the way down, Nikolai grabbed her arm. “How long have you known?”

She frowned. “About the proposal? Since you saw her face on the posters.”

It was his turn to frown. “Not even I thought about that then. It was after she got on the ship.”

Irina smiled mischievously at her brother. “Guess I’m smarter than you now.”

He pinched her side, making her giggle.

“You should rest before tonight. Gotta be patient enough not to punch Vasily in the face.”

“How did you know I was thinking about doing that?”

Nikolai smirked. “Guess I’m still smarter than you’ll ever be.”

“You little piece of shit.”

Next chapter

[notelcol]

Second vote is here! ❤️

Saving the character vote for the last one to try and make a chaotic story😆

So far we have shadow and bone as our winner fandom🫶(can’t lie I was a little surprised but I should have known the grishaverse is thirsty)

Thank you for voting! Keep an eye out for the next vote. Let’s see how interesting we can make this😝🌹

[steponmeinejghafa]

Dance With Me

Summary: Nina forces you to come to a ball with her, and soon finds out why you didn’t want to be there in the first place.

Nina Zenik x fem!Kostyk!Reader

Warnings: Stressful social setting

Note: In this, pretend Nina never went to Fjerda in KoS. This is a little before those events, but definitely after Nikolai renounced his title as Sturmhond. And you’re a Durast, just so you know. And slightly neurodivergent. Very slightly.

———

You were quietly minding your own business at the Little Palace, helping some younger Fabrikators with their abilities. Your teacher had assigned them to you earlier that week, knowing you could help them as much as possible, with your never-ending patience and calming demeanour.

All of a sudden, Nina burst into the room, frightening you and one of the other children, who accidentally threw the metal ball he was practising with at you with his power.

“Saints alive-“ you wheezed, holding your side where the object had collided with you. “Um- why don’t you go there in the corner and practise hand movements, hm?”

“Sorry, Y/n…” the boy said sheepishly. You smiled and patted his head before he ran off to join his friends on the other side of the room.

“Nina,” you breathed out, looking at her practically vibrating with excitement. “What was so important that you had to burst in so…loudly?”

She was clutching a letter in her hands and squealed, “Nikolai’s planned a ball for absolutely no reason!”

“Lovely for you,” you smiled and kissed her forehead. “Forgive my asking, but…what does that have to do with me?”

“He’s invited you, me, Tamar, Nadia, Zoya, and the others, so you have got to come with me!” She giggled.

Your heart dropped to your knees at the very thought of going to a ball, where people danced expertly, knew how to woo a lady, and definitely didn’t step on their partner’s toes while waltzing.

“Um…my love, may we discuss this a little later?” You asked, looking around the room, any where but at her.

“Of course,” she smiled. “Is everything okay?”

“Yes, yes,” you smiled. “It’s all good, just…I need to think it over.”

“Lovely!” She clapped her hands joyfully and pressed a gentle kiss to your lips, which was punctuated by a dragged out ‘ew’ from the children.

Nina laughed and nodded, mouthing, ‘I should go,’ before squeezing your hand and going out.

Later that evening, you were, again, minding your own business after having returned to the royal palace, when she burst in yet again, making you almost upset your ink bottle over the paper you were writing on.

“My-my dear, if you could just knock before entering it would be far better-“ you laughed nervously, pushing your chair back as she planted herself on your lap. Your arms instinctively wrapped around her waist, and you leaned up, kissing her cheek before smiling.

“Did you think it over?” She asked, leaning into your touch as you rested your cheek against the back of her shoulder.

You sighed, “I did, and I don’t- I don’t think I want to go…”

“Why not?” She asked, and you could practically hear her pout. “It’s a lovely evening to go for! There’s dancing, there’s music, there’s food…”

“Um…I think we can get that at any posh place in the city,” you admitted. “I just…I don’t want to go.”

“But darling, please,” she whined, turning so that her lower back rested against the edge of your table. Her arms looped around your neck as her soft green eyes met your e/c ones. “I really want to go with you! It’s been ages since we last went to an event together!”

You sighed and gave in, “Alright, but I will not dance.”

She gasped, “But why?!”

“I draw the line at dancing, my dear,” you said. “Please let it be enough that I agree to go.”

She decided not to press the matter further, and smiled brightly, her eyes grinning and her entire face lighting up. “I love you,” she said, before leaning down to kiss your lips gently.

“And I, you,” you said softly, smiling against her lips.

—Time Skip—

The day of the ball came faster than expected, and you were a nervous wreck as you and the others got ready for the festivities.

“What’s got you all jittery, Y/n?” Zoya asked, raising an eyebrow. “You’re trembling like a leaf in a storm.”

“Zoya, have you met Y/n?” Nadia laughed. “She’s like her brother, she hates social gatherings like these.”

“So she’s a little baby,” Tamar joked, poking you in the side playfully.

“Don’t be mean, now,” Genya chided them all as she tailored her hair a little redder. “Y/n just finds them mildly uncomfortable. As does David.”

“No, no, I agree with them,” you nodded, pulling on the jacket which went with your suit. “I hate social gatherings.”

“Nina, how is it that you fell in love with her?” Zoya laughed, braiding her hair so she could twist it into a bun. “She’s the exact opposite of you.”

“What can I say? I’ve got a thing for the quiet ones,” Nina giggled, coming over and kissing your cheek. “Lace me up, would you darling?”

You were already fidgety, and thankfully, lacing up your girlfriend’s dress helped quite a bit. “I was bullied into attending,” you admitted, earning a laugh from all of them. Confusion shadowed over your face as you frowned a little, “Why is that funny?”

“It just is, N/n,” Tamar ruffled your hair, earning a disgruntled noise from you as you gently pushed her hand away.

“I will…um…check on the boys,” you nodded, “Yes, I’ll go check on them.”

You hurried out of the room before anyone could stop you, counting your steps as you went to Nikolai’s massive dressing room, knowing it was precisely 203 steps away from Zoya’s, where you had been a moment ago.

You entered after knocking, and sat down on a small chair right beside a mirror.

“We’re the girls teasing you again?” Nikolai chuckled as he put his white shirt on. “Or were you just coming to visit?”

“I don’t know what they were doing, actually,” you frowned. “But I do know I don’t want to go to the ball.”

“Then don’t go,” Tolya said as if it was he most obvious thing in the world as he combed his hair back. Ball or not, he was still dressing as sharply as a soldier.

“You see, as a fact, Nina does not really enjoy missing any social gathering,” you said. “And I, on the other hand, would rather die than go to one.”

Nikolai began to wear his tie and laughed, “Am I really such a nuisance for organising these gatherings that you would rather die than attend them?”

“No, I-“ you paused, analysing his statement. “Was that a joke?”

“Yes, Y/n, yes it was,” he grinned, also ruffling your hair.

“Why does everyone keep doing that?” You mumbled, fixing your hair again.

“I agree with my sister,” came your brother’s similarly quiet voice. “I cannot say I enjoy being at such big events.”

“I’d rather be building something,” you nodded, to which David made a noise of agreement.

“Well, I can’t say you can just disagree with what Nina and Genya have said,” Tolya shrugged. “I have seen the two of them. They almost exist only for gatherings.”

“Y/n, you’ve worn something far too drab, did the others say nothing about it?” Nikolai said, looking at you.

You looked at your plain black suit, neatly pressed and creaseless. “What’s wrong with this? It’s my best suit!”

“For a funeral, maybe,” Interjected Tolya.

“Now you both are bullying me,” you frowned.

Nikolai went to his closet and pulled out a suit which looked far richer than yours, which had a white shirt, white pants, and a coat which had gold buttons all the way down the front. A thick gold border went down the length of it, and to finish it with a slightly feminine look, a delicate, spidery pattern of lace was embroidered onto the cuffs.

“Go on and try it,” Nikolai suggested, giving you the hanger on which it was kept and pushing you towards the changing screen.

You went in and tried it on, it fitting perfectly. The thick, almost kefta-like material of the coat felt nice under your fidgety fingertips, and the soft silk fabric of the shirt was welcoming on your skin. You’d never felt more confident than you did then, standing in a King’s attire.

“Let’s see how it looks, my friend!” Called out Tolya. You emerged from behind the screen, feeling your confidence give a little way for some amount of shyness at the attention.

“Damn,” Nikolai said. “I’d say Nina is going to be very happy.”

“She does say she loves me in blue,” you admitted, your hands already fidgeting with the hem of the coat, feeling the slightly prickly gold border against your fingertips.

“If you like the suit, you can keep it,” Nikolai grinned. “You look absolutely stunning in it. I have to say, you pull it off better than I do.”

You caught your brother’s eye, and he hummed in acknowledgment, nodding his head slightly. You both, even as children, had almost always communicated like this. With subtle hand gestures, eye movements, and nods.

After a little while of chatting, Nikolai exhaled sharply as he dusted off his coat sleeves. “Right, I will be on my way down to welcome the guests.”

“Hooray…” you said, with little enthusiasm. “That was sarcasm, by the way.”

“Well done,” Tolya patted you on the back. “It’s practically impossible to tell.”

You frowned, “Actually, I was being rather obvious about it…”

The giant laughed and led you out, putting an arm around your shoulder. “Never change, Y/n.”

“Um, I’ll go find Nina,” you nodded and walked off.

When your girlfriend saw you in the suit, her jaw dropped. As did everyone else’s in the room.

“I love how you look in blue,�� grinned Nina as she ran her hands down your shoulders to your waist.

You smiled slightly and whispered a thank you, blushing a bright red.

“Guys, it’s nearly eight o clock, the guests should be arriving now,” admitted Nadia as she looked at the clock on the wall. She looked at both you and Nina, adding, “Now stop making moon eyes at each other and get your backsides downstairs.”

You nodded as Nina took you by the hand, leading you downstairs, while the others followed suit.

“I’m nervous,” you said.

“Don’t be,” giggled Nina. “It’ll be fun, I promise.”

“I hope that wasn’t a joke…” you mumbled.

The ballroom filled up pretty fast, with the soft music of the band floating through the crowd. Men danced with their ladies in graceful two-steps, otherwise they whirled around in a fast-paced foxtrot. You stood at the end of the dance floor, watching closely while Nina and Nadia danced together, laughing hysterically.

There were too many people, though. Your skin crawled at the sudden thickness of the air, and you couldn’t really process the whole situation entirely. Sounds mashed together, the scent of perfume was choking, and the hum of people talking was getting annoying.

You were immediately broken out of your little freak-out when Nina caught your hand.

“Why is my gorgeous girlfriend standing here, alone, not dancing?” She asked, leaning up to kiss your lips.

“I…” you shook your head and whispered, “I’m just tired.”

“Hm…” she hummed in thought, trying to figure out what was wrong. “Do you mind telling me why you don’t want to dance with me?”

You felt your cheeks burn with embarrassment as you quietly replied, “I don’t know how to dance…”

Her eyes lit up as she held your face in her hands, and a smile tugged at her lips as she chuckled, “Was that all? You could’ve asked me to teach you!”

“I didn’t know how to ask…” you replied sheepishly.

She pulled you onto the dance floor where fewer people were swaying together, and she said, “Put your hand on my waist and hold the other,”

You did just so, and she smiled before guiding you towards doing a box step. You marvelled at how lovely a teacher she was, focusing solely on her voice.

“One, two, three, four, five, six,” you muttered under your breath. Nina laughed and squeezed your hand with hers, trying not to wince when you stepped on her toes with your hard leather shoes.

As the evening ended, you both collapsed into bed, tired for different reasons after having changed int more comfortable attire.

“You stepped more on my feet than you did the floor,” she chuckled.

“I will have you know that I was on beat,” you said. “You had it coming.”

“Well…you weren’t bad,” she nodded. “I must admit.”

You pulled her atop you and hugged her close, whispering, “Thank you for teaching me,”

“No problem, my love,” Nina replied, kissing your cheek. “It’s been a long night…” she sighed, sinking further into your touch.

“We should get some sleep,” you replied, tracing shapes on her back with your fingertips.

So there you both lay together, seeing comfort in each others embrace as the night went by, with its dark blue sky speckled with stars, and the wind blowing silently through the trees in the garden below.

———

I hope you enjoyed this one! Feel free to request!

[ell0ra-br3kk3r-writes]

Sobachka

pairing: nikolai lantsov x reader

genre: fluff

el's thoughts: just some cute fluff really nothing too it haha no real plot with this one and the gif has nothing to do with this... i just like it bahahaha

The heels on her boots clicked as Y/N walked through the halls and rounded the corner. Alina, Mal, Genya, Zoya, Tolya, Tamar, and Nikolai all turned to face her as she walked in. “Don’t mind me, sorry. Please continue.” She found her seat next to Nikolai and quickly caught onto what was being discussed.

“I’ve missed you.” 

Y/N felt the corners of her lips curl into a small smile, “I saw you this morning.” His hand rested on her thigh making her throw him a stern glace and move his hand. “Pay attention, sobachka.” She noticed his cheeks turn a light pink at her words causing her to smile a bit wider and Genya next to her to snicker into her hand.

After the meeting, Y/N and Nikolai walked down to the infirmary to make their rounds.

“Sobachka.” He scoffed making her laugh loudly. “What? How is it wrong? And it’s not like you haven’t been called it before.” She didn’t have to look at him to know he rolled his eyes, “Yes, by my mother or the elders. Literally anyone much older than me.”

“Genya calls you that sometimes.”

“Well… Yes, but that’s Genya.”

“So I can’t call you by that name but she can?” 

He sighed, “You can call me whatever you’d like, Darling.” He gave her a smirk and dodged her hand as she raised it to slap his arm. 

“What am I supposed to call you then? Nikolai is so… boring and I would like to have a cute nickname for you.” 

“So nice that you find my name boring. You call me, your love. No one else calls me their love.” He wrapped an arm around her shoulders, bringing her closer to his side to kiss her head.

She scoffed, “Well I sure hope so!” She gave him a faux side-eye. “And it’s not that I find your name boring. You know I love your name, Nik. Just, everyone calls you that and I want to call you something else. Something special. Am I making any sense?” 

He nodded and chuckled, “Yes I understand, but know that anything you call me is already ten times more special just because it came from your lips.”

Y/N felt her cheeks heat up, “You’re a flirt, you know that.”

“For you and you alone, Darling.”

[thebadgerclan]

Moi Tsar

Pairing: Nikolai Lantsov x reader

Summary:  After the attack on the Spinning Wheel...

Everything had gone wrong so fast.  One second, you’d been watching as Vasily made a drunken speech about your husband and the Sun Summoner, the next, you’d watched him be dismembered.  Your location had been revealed, the Darkling had attacked, and you’d been separated from Nikolai.  The last you’d seen of him, he’d been herding his mother from the ballroom with a shout of, “Protect the Queen!”

You’d tried to fight, to evacuate as many people as you could, but when the Darkling’s shadow monster had struck you and you’d fallen to the floor, your mind shifted toward getting yourself out.  You were dizzy and delirious with pain, but you’d somehow managed to get into the tunnels dug beneath the Spinning Wheel.  Alya, one of Nikolai’s Grisha, was the first person you found, and you had only one question.

“Nikolai,” you gasped.  “Where is Nikolai?  Is he here?  Was he hurt?  Is–”  “I don’t know,” Alya said, taking your arm and leading you to a cot.  “I’m sure he’s fine.”  Tears built behind your eyes, and you felt panic ebbing in.  “He could have been killed,” you said.  “He could be hurt, he could be dying, he–”  “Y/N!”  You fell silent at the cry of your name, however quiet the voice was.

“Y/N!  Y/N, are you here?”  Nikolai was bordering on hysterical.  When he’d gotten his mother out of danger, he’d returned for you, only to find a splatter of blood on the marble where you’d been standing.  “Y/N!  Y/N!”  He scanned every face he passed, and while he was relieved to see his soldiers alive and here, his priority was you.  “Nikolai?”  He froze, praying he hadn’t misheard.  “Nikolai!”  “Y/N!”  He took off running, and when the crowd parted to reveal you doing the same, he let out a sob.  “Y/N!”

You slammed into his chest, wrapping your arms tightly around him, knees giving out.  But Nikolai held you up, clutching you to him.  “Oh my love,” he cried.  “I thought… I didn’t…I…. Saints, I thought….”  “I know,” you managed, lifting your face from his chest to look at him.  “I didn’t know what happened to you, where you were.  I thought I’d lost you.”  Your husband smirked, wiping a tear from your cheek. “Never, my darling.  It’ll take more than a shadow demon to take me away from you.”

“Sir,” came Tamar’s voice.  Nikolai didn’t release you from his vice-like grip, but he lifted his head from your hair.  “Baghra’s arrived.  She wishes to speak with you and Alina.”  Nikolai nodded, sweeping you into his arms and following his Heartrender to a private chamber.  The Grisha teacher was waiting when you arrived, and introductions had hardly been made when a girl with flaming auburn hair and horrific scars entered.

Alina embraced her immediately.  “Oh, Genya,” she whispered, and your husband went rigid.  “Genya?” he asked, gently setting you down.  “Genya Safin?  The Grisha who poisoned the King?”  You looked at the girl before you, unable to imagine this shriveled thing able to pull off regicide.  “Moi tsarevich,” she said, and Tamar corrected; “Moi tsar.  He’s your King now.”  Your gaze flew from Genya to your husband.  The King?  You wracked your brain, trying to remember anything but chaos from the party, but only one thing stood out: Protect the Queen, he’d ordered, but he hadn’t meant his mother, he’d meant you.  You were the Queen now.

Try as you might, you barely heard anything after that.  You were Queen, Nikolai was King.  Both Vasily and Pytor dead in a matter of minutes.  You barely noticed when Alina led Genya from the room, but when Nikolai gently took your hand and sat you on the bed, you snapped to attention.  “Are you alright?” he asked, cupping your face, scanning you for wounds.  “I… I don’t…”  Your husband pulled you into his arms, and you crawled into his lap, pressing your face into his chest.  He smelled like smoke and gunpowder, but beneath it, that unmistakable smell that was your Nikolai.

“You’re the King,” you managed, and Nikolai nodded.  “Yes,” he replied, voice cracking. “I am.”  After a few minutes, you lifted your head, locking eyes with your husband.  “Kolya, I thought you were dead.”  “I thought the same of you,” he said, tightening his hold on you.  Tamar entered, bearing a basin of warm water and a few pieces of cloth, which Nikolai thanked her for, before leaving the two of you alone.

Your husband cleaned the blood and grime from your face, and you did the same for him, all while remaining in his lap.  “What do we do now?” you whispered as Nikolai laid down, pulling you into his arms.  “We leave for Zvedya in the morning,” he said, tucking a piece of hair behind your ear.  “We regroup, and we keep fighting.  For Ravka.  For the future.  For what we love most.”

Nikolai pressed a lingering kiss to your lips, winding his arms around you.  “I love you, my darling,” he whispered, his lips brushing against yours.  “My Y/N, my love, my darling.  I love you so much.  “I love you too, Nikolai,” you replied, nuzzling your face into his chest.  “I love you.”  Exhaustion soon pulled you under, your husband following soon after.  Your sleep was dreamless, and when you woke, it was to Nikolai pressing gentle kisses to your forehead.

“Wake up, lovely,” he coaxed.  “We’re leaving.”  As much as you wanted to burrow under the blankets and pretend that yesterday hadn’t happened, you rose and dressed, shouldering your new mantle as Queen of Ravka.  You’d been attacked, yes, your soldiers wounded, some returned to the Saints, but you would fight on.  With Nikolai at your side, leading your men and women, you would persevere.  And if your country wanted to be a drowning man, then you’d just have to dive in headfirst and save it.

[bey0nd-1he-stars]

Wedding bands - Nikolai Lantsov

Masterlists

Pairing: Nikolai Lantsov x reader

Wordcount: 1268

Warnings: none

Summary: You finally tell your friends and crew what your ring is for.

The wind blew in the sails, carrying the Volkvolny across the open seas. Almost the whole crew were up on deck, a few squallers minding the sails but mostly letting the natural wind do the work. Tamar and Tolya had gathered a small group of people and settled down for a few rounds of cards. Nikolai had sat down on the floor up on quarterdeck, a map laid out in front of him. You were out on request of the king so Nikolai hadn’t bothered to tailor himself. You kept close to Ravkan shores anyway and it was his waters so neither of you were especially worried. You stood behind him, watching over his shoulder as he studied it. Usually he would keep all of his maps down in the captain’s cabin but the sun was out and the soft breeze was refreshing. And you were out here on deck. That was always a plus. 

After a while Nikolai rolled up the map and stood to leave it in his cabin. You just gave him a nod and a smile before Tamar shouted for you to join them. They had sat down on the main deck at a bench and used a crate as a table. You smiled in thanks when Tolya handed you a set of cards. Your ring flashed in the sun when you took them from him and you saw his gaze flickering down to it for just a second. When you’d played for a while, Tolya brought it up.

“What’s that ring for? You always wear it and you’ve been wearing it since I met you,” he placed down his card in the pile and looked up at you. You smirked and placed down your card as well, leaving you victorious, “you know I won't tell you.” He shrugged, “worth a shot.” Tamar looked at you with raised eyebrows, “your heart rate picked up,” she stated with a smirk and placed a card in the pile. A faint blush covered your cheeks and you looked away from her for a second, and that was your mistake.

“You’re in love with someone!” she exclaimed and turned to face you fully. You let out a surprised huff and laughed softly, “what?” 

“Who’s in love?” Nikolai’s deep voice cut you off and you all turned towards him. The sun made his hair look golden. His hazel eyes looked like they had pieces of gold flowing in them and the blue of his jacket complimented his looks very well. It blew softly in the wind and tugged at the ends. Your Y/H/C hair was up but a few strands got caught in the wind and Nikolai had to tear his gaze away from you, his breath caught in his throat for a second. Tamar smirked and turned to you again. 

“Dear Y/N here. Her ring is a ring from a lover.” 

“Well that’s no news,” Nikolai smiled and sat down beside Tolya and you all returned to the game but continued talking. Tolya seemed a bit upset at his statement, “what do you mean ‘no news?’ You knew?” He turned to Nikolai who just shrugged and smirked at him. Tamar let out a huff, “you bastard,” she mumbled and both you and Nikolai burst out laughing. 

“But I’m right, then? You are in love?” Tamar pressed. They’d finished playing and Tolya had lost. Now the cards just laid in a pile in the crate and all the attention was directed towards you. You searched for Nikolai’s gaze and he gave you a quick, almost unnoticeable nod.

“Yeah, you are. I'm in love.” Tamar smirked at that and gave you a nod to continue. 

“What? What do you want me to say?” you laughed and started gathering together the cards again in a proper pile. 

“Well, is it a promise ring? Or how far along are we talking?” Tolya said and encouraged you to tell them all of it. Nikolai just shook his head in amusement. That it could be so interesting to know about your love life, but he stayed anyway. He wanted to see their reactions if you decided to tell them the truth. 

“It’s… It’s a wedding ring, actually,” you confessed and twisted the ring on your finger. The gemstones glittered in the sun and the gold shined. You had decided to just wear the wedding ring on your finger and hung the promise ring and the engagement ring on a chain around your neck, hiding away the Lantsov emerald from plain sight. Tolya gaped at your statement and then he turned to Nikolai.

“You knew she's married?” he asked, stunned that you’d told Nikolai and not them. You were all very close friends and Tolya thought that you’d tell them all if you were to tell anyone. But so the case didn’t seem to be because Nikolai knew. Your husband chuckled, “fortunately enough, I do.” Tolya turned to Tamar, feeling a bit betrayed but in a joking manner, of course. Tamar, intrigued, turned to Nikolai too, deciding it probably would be easier to get him to spill what he knew than to try to ask you. 

“Do you know who he is?” She lifted an eyebrow at him and leaned forward and rested her head in her hand. Nikolai’s gaze flicked to yours, amusement swirling in his eyes and a smirk resting on his lips. 

“Would be weird if I didn’t.”

“Well, tell us,” The twins demanded. Nikolai just smirked and with a laugh he lifted his own left hand where a golden wedding band rested on his ring finger. 

“Him? You’re married to him?” Tamar turned back to you, surprised but when she thought about it, it made sense. You always hung around Nikolai, often touching him, whether it was a hand on his shoulder, a hand threading through his hair or your elbows or knees touching. And if you weren’t with him your gaze always traveled the area as if taking in the scenery, but in reality, you were just looking for him. She’d never thought about it before but those days when something went bad or when he was hurt, or maybe just having a tough day and he disappeared into his captain’s cabin, you disappeared too. You watched as the puzzle pieces started to fit together in her head and you just nodded.  

“How long?” Tolya wondered out loud. Nikolai smiled, “a few years.” You nodded along with a smile “how long have you seen me wear this ring?” 

Tamar smiled, she knew you were telling the truth, but still, it was fun to tease you both, “prove it,” she demanded with a laugh. 

“Prove it?” Nikolai wondered, “what do you mean prove it? Isn’t the rings pretty big proof, or how do they marry in Shu Han?” Tamar smirked, “I demand to see a kiss.” Nikolai turned to you and you just shrugged. They were your closest friends, it didn’t matter if they saw you kiss one time. You took the hand Nikolai reached out to you and he pulled you to your feet. With one arm around your waist and one cupping your face, he pressed his lips to yours. You wrapped your arms around his neck and pulled him closer to you, burying your hands in his golden locks. You heard them cheer you on and Nikolai smiled into the kiss. When the two of you pulled away, Nikolai held you close to him anyway, looking into your eyes and smiling like an idiot, happy that you finally could show your relationship among your friends.

[loubombshell]

Imagine Nikolai being drunk.

Nikolai Lantsov x Fem!Reader

It was a beautiful evening. The sun started to set, turning the entire sky into a beautiful red while the ocean reflected the color. A refreshing breeze blew trough y/n's hair, making her take a deep breath from the salty taste of the wind. Her eyes followed the wind, that filled their sail. Most of the time a Squaller was responsible for the wind, carrying them around the ocean, but right now they had enough of it to sail on their own. Y/n sat on a bench near the railing just enjoying the view and the sound of the waves.

A shadow walked up behind her and sat down next to her, one on her left and one on her right. The girl turned around and looked at Tolya and Tamar joining her.

"Do you need anything from me?" She asked with a little smirk.

"Don't act like we just come around when we need something." Tolya scoffed.

"The last time you talked to me was- wait let me think." Y/n put a finger on her chin, pretending to really think. "Oh yes! It was when you lost your sword and thought Nikolai added it to his weapon collection." She chuckled about it.

Tamar laughed a bit about the conversation and put a hand on Y/n's shoulder.

"You're not completely wrong. It's about Nikolai, he and the whiskey got pretty close to each other- like really close." Tamar told her honestly and Y/n sighed a bit about it.

"On my way." Y/n added and made her way under deck. She didn't hear him singing old sailor songs, which is a good sign.

So far, so good.

The creaky door opened, revealing Nikolai's chambers. There was a desk, with different maps either drawn by him or getting ripped from a book. The lamps hanging from the ceiling swayed to the left and right with the rhythm of the waves, that were hitting the ship.

In the middle of it, Nikolai stumbling from left to right also with the direction of the waves. Y/n had to bite her lips a bit, trying to hold her laugh, she came in and closed the door behind her.

Nikolai turned around by the sound of the closing door, looking at his girlfriend standing in the room too, he let out a drunken smile.

"Y/n!" He raised his arms happily. "The girl of my dreams." He chuckled and walked towards her. "Whoops." He let out when he swayed pretty much to the left side.

"Princess of my Kingdom. My leading Star. Fire of my love and-" Nikolai called her and put both of his hands on her shoulders, as soon as he reached her.

Y/n crossed her arms infront if her chest and raised her eyebrows up. "Are you finished?" She stopped him.

"-and my little mermaid." He smirked and tapped her with a finger on her nose.

The girl was charmed by his words, even if he won't remember them the next day. She wanted to keep a straight face, but after his last sentence she lost it.

"I hope you know, that alcohol isn't good for you and your body." She told him honestly. "You're not going to get older than 40 when you keep doing." She added.

"Are you saying you're going to miss me in a few years then?" He smirked.

"Of course dumbass. I want to see your beautiful face in wrinkles." Y/n joked smirking.

Nikolai looked horrified to her and touched his own face.

"Oh no! I never thought of this." He admitted.

Y/n laughed even more about it. "Come on, let's get you to bed." She took his hand and lead him towards his bed.

"You could've just said so many minutes ago." Nikolai smirked but Y/n couldn't take him seriously with his drunk face. She just shook her head with a smile and pushed him into bed, helping him to take off the shoes and threw them into some corner of the room and sat down on the side of his mattress.

"Are you going to sing for me now?" Nikolai asked with a smirk and looked to her.

"If you want me to wake a shark up, sure." She told him smirking. She was a terrible singer, but she had her qualities elsewhere.

Nikolai chuckled a bit about it. "I can teach you, I'm a great singer." He smirked arrogant. "Do I get a goodnight kiss?" He leaned on his elbows.

Y/n rolled her eyes with a smirk and leaned towards, wanting to give him a little kiss to the cheek but in the last moment her turned his head and she kissed his lips instead. The girl didn't pull back, she stayed like this for a few seconds before ending the kiss with a smile.

"You taste like alcohol, idiot." She pushed him back into the pillow with a smirk and stood up again.

"You're not going to join me?" Nikolai asked her.

Y/n shook her head laughing. "Goodnight, Nikolai." She closed his door and walked over to the little cabinet with his liquors in it, she grabbed every bottle and walked upstairs again with the many bottles drowning every single one in the Sea.

[naushtheaspiringauthor]

You know how there are those fics where a runaway noble reader ends up on Sturmhonds ship and she doesn't know who he is but he knows who she is and shenanigans ensue

Picture this: both Nikolai and Reader ended up doing the whole "tailor myself and sailing the seas" thing but Reader figured out who Sturmhond is while Nikolai has no clue. Because there's no way two people had the exact same idea. Basically a reversal of the trope. Now let the shenanigans ensue

The one left behind - Nikolai Lantsov x reader

A/N- I hope you enjoy reading it as much as I did writing it😽😽 Tysm for sending this request!!

Summary- When a rather intriguing girl joins Sturmhond's crew, he finds himself quite drawn to her. However, he still reminisces about the one he'd left behind.

You closed your eyes for a brief moment, allowing the cool breeze to wash over your skin. It was comfort, a sense of hope and most importantly, your freedom. 

You'd finally gotten out of your wrecked household that withheld a father who wished for you to be dead only because you'd refused to abide by his terms. 

You were the daughter of a noble, one who had esteemed relations with the royal family, with you having become friends with the youngest prince. Who was however long since left the country and even though you missed him with all your heart, had no way of reaching him. 

From education to numerous life skills, your parents had provided you with all. However they both had different paths chosen for you to tread upon. 

Your mother had wished for you to acquire a position in Ravka's council. 

Your father however, had wished for you to go to Fjerda and work as a spy for your country. 

 Though no one had ever bothered to ask you what you wished for. 

When your mother had passed, your father had been forcing you to leave for Fjerda.

When you'd opposed, he'd only wished to get rid of you in whatever way possible. 

So you had ran, from a life that was none less than a prison, from a father who no longer wanted you because you opposed to living your life his way. 

….......................................

You took in your new features in the scroungy mirror at the small boarding house you'd been living in. 

You'd gotten a tailor to alter your face so that you wouldn't be recognized as your father had organized a search party for you. 

Your hair was still the long black locks, but your nose was now far sharper than it'd been, and y/e/c eyes were now a light blue, rather tacky for your taste but it was necessary.

The tailor had told you that she'd put in her best efforts to make it last as long as possible, but you'd still need to get it fixed up occasionally. 

 ……............................... 

The next morning, you set out to meet with some crew member of the infamous Volkvolny, a ship commanded by some young pirate as you'd heard. 

You sat at one of the tables of the inn you were supposed to meet at. However, the girl hadn't even shown up yet. 

Just when you were about to leave, you noticed a girl with close cropped hair entering. She had two axes slung around her back and her features stated that she was Shu. 

However, you observed that she hadn’t come alone. She had some red-haired boy wearing a teal coat by her side.

“You’re the Tamar I was to talk to?” You asked, raising an eyebrow as she and the boy sat across you.

“Yes. Sorry for the delay. The captain wished to talk to you himself” She responded, glancing at the boy

You eyed him with your eyebrow still raised. Few strands of his red hair fell near his eyes. His hazel eyes gleamed in the light, and his nose was slightly crooked. He appeared no older than twenty, too young to be a captain.

“You’re the captain?” you asked, giving him a rather judging look.

“I believe I am,” he spoke with a proud grin. His voice sounding familiar to you for some reason. “I happen to be the infamous Sturmhond” he continued to grin

You glanced at him for a moment. There was something familiar about his eyes, but you just couldn’t place it. Perhaps you’d just started feeling so homesick that you’d begun to imagine things now.

“Novak, Evanna Novak” you finally respond, clearly not returning his expression

“Well’ he cleared his throat. “Miss Novak, to have you as a member of my crew, I must ask you what skills do you happen to possess?” he asked

“I’m an engineer, can help in fixing up your ship but I’ve also got training in combat” you spoke

The boy leaned back and finally spoke after a short moment, “Well, I believe we do happen to need an engineer aboard the Volkvolny. Name your price”

“I just need enough to fulfill all my requirements, no more no less. But there's another” you responded

“What's that?”

“I get to keep my freedom” you lifted up your chin, you'd come all this way for one thing only and you weren't going to let it slip away again. 

“Well, I believe we have a deal then” the boy responded. He clasped his hands in front of him as he stood up, “We leave at sunrise, meet us at the docks”.

He walked out of the inn with Tamar by his side. Though there was something strange about him that you couldn't quite place. 

.......…............................ 

“I have an idea” Nikolai sprang up from his chair

“What's that?” you asked, not even bothering to look up from your book. 

“Someday, I can get a ship that I'll be captain of and then we can sail the seas together” he spoke with great zeal. 

You set down your book and met his gaze. “Do you really think my parents would let me?” 

“We'll be adults by then, you could make your own decisions” 

You chuckled slightly, “No one cares about what I want, Nikolai. They'd still take all the decisions of my life”

“I do, I care about what you want” he responded, giving you his innocent look that would make you agree to whatever he'd say. 

..........................…..................... 

You reached the docks at the exact time you'd been given. You hadn't exactly slept the whole night. Whether it was thrill, fear or something entirely different, you didn't know, you no longer cared. You only wished to be free. 

You stepped on the sleek schooner that was the Volkvolny. The ship was quite a marvel and you were intrigued by the fact that the young captain had somehow managed to acquire it. 

You were introduced to the crew by Tamar and her twin brother Tolya who perfectly resembled the structure of a massive tree and had the habit of reciting random verses of poetry mid conversation. 

Sturmhond too, had greeted you as you'd come. And seeing him shouting orders to his crew and grinning along with them made you wonder how he'd managed to do it all. 

......…...............................… 

“I don't like these parties in the slightest” you grumbled, leaning against the railing of the balcony. 

The queen had thrown yet another ball for some reason and the only reason you'd come was because you'd get to see Nikolai. Though your immense hatred for the event hadn't deteriorated in the slightest. 

And what made you even furious was how perfectly Nikolai managed to do it all. Making small talk with the guests, occasionally annoying his brother Vasily and being the center of attention. 

He was far cheery and great at conversing for a sixteen year old boy. 

“Me neither, these people are so fake it's maddening. Nothing coming out of their mouths might be true” Nikolai agreed with you

“But you do it all so perfectly, it's very annoying” you rolled your eyes

“Well, for being a royal, learning to charm people with words is a necessity. Even if it's not true in the slightest” He shrugged. 

You grimaced at his words and turned to look at the starry sky, without the slightest hint of his gaze on you. 

He was mesmerized by how beautiful you looked. You were majestic to him at all times, but there was something entirely different about you tonight. 

Your long flaunty dress that you'd been forced to wear, hung perfectly at your shoulders. A few loose strands of your hair fell near your eyes and he had to fight the urge to tuck them behind your ear. 

Your eyes gleamed in the moonlight. 

You were majestic. 

He slowly slid his hand near yours on the railing and gently placed it on top of yours, making your gaze turn to him. 

You gazed in his perfect hazel eyes, fully unaware of how red your cheeks had become. 

“You look marvelous” he spoke, his voice a mere whisper. “And I'm not only making it up to charm you” he added with a grin. 

“Like you ever could “ you rolled your eyes, a smirk playing over your lips

…..........................................… 

You'd been aboard the Volkvolny for about a week now. And you'd already become quite popular amongst the crew for not only your work but your quick wits and splendid sparring skills. 

Sturmhond would always attempt to make small talk with you and charm you with his idiotic grin. 

You helped him with his designs of a flying ship he was attempting to make along with his other erratic inventions, whilst he tried his best to learn more about you. 

“So, why did you really choose to have this life?” he asked, abandoning his work as he turned towards you

“Well, I simply wished to live a life free from all kinds of burdens” you responded, not willing to share your entire life history. “I believed I could live my life by my own rules here, at the sea”

“I have to admit I agree. It's one of the reasons I'm here as well. Though I do think of all I've left behind” he glanced at a far corner of his desk. 

For a moment, he appeared as a lost prince stuck in another fantasy. 

That was when you noticed the massive deep green gem fixed on his ring. 

You'd seen the ring before, but you hadn't really looked at it. 

The Lantsov Emerald

Very similar to the one Nikolai had on him. 

How had he gotten it? Perhaps he had stolen it from him? What had happened to Nikolai? Was he even alive? A thousand questions filled your head. 

But you brushed them off, quickly regaining your composure. 

Nikolai had stopped writing to you a long while ago, there was no point in thinking of him anymore. 

He no longer cared for you.

…....................................… 

You'd tried your best to keep your composure intact when he'd told you. 

When you'd found out that he was leaving to attend the university at Ketterdam. 

It was best for him of course, you'd known. But it still hurt you to part from him. The boy you'd been with since you were children. 

The boy you'd known as every line from your favorite book. 

You sat alone in the garden, the moon gleaming above you. Nikolai was to leave the following day, but you needed to be strong for him. 

You couldn't make a fool of yourself in front of him. 

You suddenly heard the shuffling of footsteps behind you. “You know you aren't as stern as you show yourself to be. You can be quite emotional” you turned around to see Nikolai. 

He was dressed in a white shirt with the sleeves folded up. 

He looked marvelous. 

“I am not” you rolled your eyes. 

“Come on, you've got to admit that you'll miss me” he grinned as he sat beside you. 

“Well, I guess I might miss hearing your annoying chatter all the time” you shrugged

“See? Acceptance isn’t so bad” he grinned 

You rolled your eyes, “Whatever”

You looked down at your feet. You were going to miss him, you knew it. And you had no idea when you might see him again.

You wished to speak up, to tell him how much he meant to you, how much you cared for him. 

You wished to let him know how much you’d come to like him, even though you never showed it.

You wished to let him know how much you loved him.

But you couldn’t, you couldn’t muster up the courage to do it. And you believed it was for the better. Perhaps he wouldn’t even care once he’s gone. You hated the thought of it.

You reached your hands over to your neck and took off your pendant. You held it out in your palm, “Keep it with you, it’ll remind of you of someone waiting for you to come back”

He glanced at you before nodding. “I wouldn’t even dream of forgetting you” he smiled, taking it from your palm

You smiled, a slight tilt of your lips, perfectly displaying your melancholic feelings. 

He brought his palm forward, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear. He then held your hand in his as he gazed deep in your y/e/c eyes. 

“Promise me that you’ll write to me. That you won’t slip away” you spoke, your voice a mere whisper

“I promise. No matter where I am, I’ll never stop thinking of you”.

You gazed at him, your eyes speaking the words your mouth never could.

...………………………………..

After several weeks on board, you woke up one morning and noticed the change in your features in the mirror. 

The effects of the tailoring were wearing off.

You’d gone to Tolya and had him tailor it back. You’d explained to him and Tamar about your need for it and they’d promised to keep your secret safe.

Later during the afternoon, you’d went to Sturmhond’s cabin to retrieve the designs of your latest project from him, only to find that he hadn't been there.

As you thought to leave, you noticed the very document you’d come for was on his desk. However, as you picked it up, you heard a sharp clatter.

As you bent down to pick up whatever had fallen down, you truly realized what it’d been

You felt as if your heart had stopped beating. You couldn't fathom the sights in front of you. 

It was your pendant. 

The one you'd given to Nikolai as a parting gift. 

The Lantsov Emerald and now, your pendant? You couldn't formulate a plausible explanation for all of it. 

Sturmhond, the captain with a terribly made up name. The Captain who was too young to be one. The boy who had far too polite manners to be a Pirate- Privateer as he'd say. 

The boy with the too familiar eyes and voice.  

Was it truly him? 

Was it truly, Nikolai? 

..…....................................... 

Nikolai had never been this conflicted in his entire life. 

He couldn't stop himself from glancing at a certain new member of his crew whenever she'd be working. 

He couldn't stop himself from attempting to strike a conversation with her at any given opportunity. 

He couldn't stop himself from falling in love with her. 

But he still thought of her, the one he'd left back home. He still yearned for the sight of her, the gleam of her eyes in the moonlight, her rare but marvelous smile, he still yearned for her. 

Though he knew he'd abandoned her. He had stopped sending her letters when he'd left the university and had decided to be at the sea. 

Part of him believed that she'd forgotten him, that she'd have moved on, no matter how much he despised the thought. 

He wished he would have spoken when he had the chance. He wished he'd told her how much he loved her, how much it broke his heart to leave her, how much she meant to him. 

But he hadn't, and he despised himself for it. 

...........................................… 

You noticed the effects of Tolya's tailoring were wearing off. However, you chose to leave them be for a while. 

You needed the real you for the moment. 

You saw Sturmhond standing by himself near the railing.

You noticed the moonlight making something in his palm gleam. 

The pendant, you realized. 

He had it in his hand. 

You stepped closer to him as you spoke, “Captain's having trouble sleeping?” you asked. 

He hastily put the pendant away in the pocket of his overcoat. He regained his composure before speaking, “Yeah. Could ask you the same though” he shifted his gaze towards the sea again

“Well, I was going to, but then I happened to see a certain melancholic boy. Something on your mind?” you asked, furrowing your brows. 

“No, not really” he shrugged as he looked down

You raised an eyebrow, clearly not fooled by his lie. 

He wasn't okay, you knew it. 

You'd seen it. 

And perhaps, it was time you'd told him the truth. But you first needed to know what was on his mind. 

“You can talk to me, you know? Something's off with you, and you aren't very good at hiding it” you rested your hands on the railing

He sighed, as he lifted his head up. 

“I- When I decided to leave home, I left a lot behind. There's a lot I don't really miss, but one” He took out the pendant from his pocket. “I yearn for her. And- and I don't even know if she even thinks of me anymore” his voice trembled as he continued

Your heart stopped. 

He believed you'd forgotten him. He thought you no longer cared. If only he knew how much you'd missed him, how he'd never left your mind. How you'd always thought of him during the sleepless nights. 

“I, I don't think she would've forgotten that easy” you attempted to keep your voice steady

“I abandoned her” his voice trembled, he sounded immensely hurt. “I stopped writing to her, I- I never saw her once. Maybe it's for the best. Maybe, she's moved on, she has a better life, she is happy. That's all that matters to me” tears began to well up in his eyes. 

His state, his words, shattered your heart. You weren't happy, you didn't have a better life until you'd come here, you couldn't be happy without him.

You couldn't take it any longer. 

You took a deep breath before speaking, “She isn't happy, not without you, Nikolai” 

He stilled. 

He turned his head towards you in a haste. “Wha-” he looked utterly perplexed

“I know it's you” your gaze softened

“Wait,” His eyes widened as he finally realized. “It's not you, it cannot be” he turned away his gaze. 

You gently held your hand in his, “Nikolai, look at me” you said. 

He slowly shifted his gaze to you and looked, really looked at you. 

The effects of Tolya's tailoring were now fully gone. Your true features had returned.

He let out a breath as he took your name. “Is it truly you?” he asked, his voice a mere whisper

You nodded, gently smiling. 

“How? What are you doing here?” he asked

“It's a long story. It was either I went off to Fjerda or die. So I chose none of those” you shrugged

“What!?” he asked in pure shock

You sighed, “My mother passed away, Nik. I- my father, he wished for me to become a spy, go to Fjerda. I refused, so he wanted nothing more than for me to die. So I ran. That's why I needed the tailoring” you explained.

 “I had my doubts but I wasn't sure if it was really you, not until I saw that” you glanced at the pendant. 

His gaze softened as he realized the whole thing. 

“You still have it” you grinned slightly

“Of course I do, it's the only thing I have that reminds me of you” He smiled with teary eyes. 

“I, I'm sorry, for not writing to you. But you never left my mind, I never stopped thinking of you” he spoke after a short moment. 

“I believed you no longer cared” your voice shook as you glanced down. 

“I would never stop caring for you, love” he said. 

He gently cupped your face in his hands, making your gaze turn to his. “I would never stop loving you” his voice grew lower.

Your eyes widened at his words. 

You'd loved him. You had loved him all your life, more than one could ever think of. But you'd never anticipated him to ever feel the same. 

You felt as if time had stopped at that very moment. There was none other but you and him, two hearts beating as one. 

“I love you, I always have” he said, his teary eyes gleaming

Your gaze softened. 

Your face broke into a soft, relieved grin as you spoke, “I love you too Nik, I always will”.

You gazed deep in his bright hazel eyes before pulling closer to him. 

You gently pressed your lips to his, the action making a part of you heal that'd been broken too long. 

You pulled away from him in a short moment. You met his gaze before he pulled you in, kissing you in the way he'd always longed for. 

You smiled as you pulled away from him. 

“I have to admit I had no idea it was you” he spoke with a beatific grin

His expression grew somber. “You've changed,” he said.

“Time and experiences change all of us” you responded, glancing down. 

“Not you though, you're still the same annoying blabbermouth you were” you joked, regaining your composure in a haste. 

“Oh admit it, you love it” he grinned, teasing you. 

“I believe I do,” you smiled.

“Promise you'll remain by my side from now?” he asked after a short moment

“Only if I get a promotion” you shrugged, grinning. 

“Alright then” he chuckled, and took your hand in his. 

Your fate had brought you back to the life you'd once been stripped of. It had brought you back to him, and you were entirely grateful for it. 

please lets just pretend he had the lantsov emerald before when his mother gave it to him in ruin and rising it was necessary for the plot okayy

anyways i hope i wasnt the only one giggling by the end

[flightlessangelwings]

Ktober Day 4- Sex Pollen

Nikolai Lantsov x gn!Corporalki!reader

Word count- 1.9k

Warnings- s.mut (18+ ONLY!), mutual pining, multiple orgasms, no use of y/n

Notes- Nikolai my beloved I can't believe I've never written anything for him before! What a way to start writing for him, huh lol?! Prompt list made by me! Enjoy!

@flightlessangelwings-updates is myupdate blog so please follow that too and turn on post notifs to stay up to date on my new fics!

~

“Captain?” you knocked at the door to his quarters, “Is everything alright?” you called through the door as you tested the handle. Finding it unlocked, you slowly opened it and peeked inside, “Tamar wanted me to check on you.”

“Everything’s alright, love,” Nikolai quickly put himself together as you entered his room. He felt his brow dampen as it lined with sweat, and he adjusted his pants uncharacteristically awkwardly as he laid his eyes on you. He always found you attractive, but suddenly, he couldn’t stop the thoughts that barraged his mind.

“Nikolai,” you breathed his true name as you closed the door behind you, “I can feel your heart… It’s…” pounding erratically, beating faster than you had ever felt before, about to explode, “What happened?” you asked as you rushed over to him and looked him over. He was bright red and you saw the way beads of sweat dripped down his face. He looked like he had lost his composure as he covered his mouth, something you had never seen before.

“It’s… nothing…” he breathed heavily as he tried to hide the way his pants tightened between his legs.

Nikolai and the twins had just returned to the ship from an excursion. Everything went fine, until the Captain got separated from the others and didn’t seem himself when he returned. He refused to say anything, but every Corporalki could sense that something was off, including you. It worried you, but Nikolai didn’t want to worry you.

“Forgive me if I don’t believe you,” you said sternly yet softly, “Now please, let me help you,” you reached out to try and touch his forehead to assess what was wrong.

But the moment the tips of your fingers made the briefest contact with his heated skin, Nikolai grabbed your wrist and looked at you with a fire behind his eyes that you had never seen before. He hissed your name as his hands trembled, “Leave,” his voice was strained as he fought against his own mind. If he gave in to whatever he had pulsing through his veins, he wouldn’t be able to stop himself from ravaging you. And Nikolai could never forgive himself if he hurt you at all.

“Nikolai,” you whispered, “I’m not leaving you. Not when you’re like this.”

Nikolai let out a low groan that made your breath hitch in your throat. You felt his agony as his hand clenched tightly around your wrist. But there was something else that weighed heavily in your heart. You hated seeing him like this, helpless to do anything for him. And you would do anything for him. You had been hopefully in love with him from practically your first meeting, but you kept those feelings buried deep down. 

“Listen to me,” Nikolai strained as he hovered closer to you, “I don’t have time to explain,” he forced a half a smile, “And I wouldn’t want anything to come between us if I can’t stop myself right now… Especially before I got the chance to wine and dine you first.”

At that moment, you felt your own face heat up, “What?”

He cursed under his breath as his body shook, “I don’t know what happened out there, I can’t remember, but whatever it is, everything in me is screaming to fuck you senseless right now or else I feel like I’ll explode.” His memory was hazy, but in his time apart from the others, something must have attacked him and poisoned him with… something. It wasn’t like any other poison, though, nothing Nikolai knew of had effects like… this.

Your mouth dropped open as you processed the weight of his words and what they meant. You felt your own heart flutter in your chest as Nikolai’s gaze bore into your soul. You felt the fire behind his eyes and it lit your body aflame. You had wanted this… wanted him… for so long. But you never in your wildest dreams could have imagined this.

“Let me help,” your voice was so hushed you barely even heard your words. But, from the way Nikolai’s expression changed, you knew he heard you. Swallowing your nerves, you closed the small gap between your bodies and cupped his face, “You can use me.”

“Darling,” his voice didn’t even sound like him as he immediately grabbed you and yanked you so that your chest was flush with his. Then, Nikolai looked surprised, as if his body moved on his own at your words, “I couldn't…”

You whimpered as you felt his hard cock against your body, “You need to,” your own voice trembled, “I…” you sighed as you rested your forehead against his, “I can’t lose you,” your confession was a soft whisper, but it held all the emotions that you kept hidden from everyone, especially him.

In a flash, Nikolai’s lips were on yours in a heated kiss. He swallowed the moan you let out as his hands roamed over your body, ripping at your clothes with abandon as he did so. You clung to him and you heard his heartbeat through your ears; it sounded like the way your ears rang when you were too close to cannon fire. You heard the blood rushing through his veins at incredible speed… or was it your own pulse in your ears?

The room spun in a tizzy as you suddenly found yourself naked on Nikolai’s desk, your legs spread open on their own, as if you felt the effects of whatever infected him as well. But, it didn’t matter. All you could think about was the way he bared his own body before you. Quickly, Nikolai stripped himself of his own clothes, and cock springing free as if it guided his body towards yours the moment it was exposed.

You bit your lip and whimpered as he cupped you between your legs.

“Darling,” Nikolai’s voice was low as he fought to hold himself back momentarily, “Do not let me hurt you.”

Seeing the conviction in his eyes made your heart skip a beat and your inner muscles clenched around nothing, “I trust you,” was your reply. It wasn’t a lie, and you wouldn’t have offered yourself to him if you didn’t.

He groaned as he pumped his cock a few times and lined himself up with your entrance. Pausing only for a fraction of a moment, Nikolai met your eyes before he thrust himself into you.

You threw your head back and screamed as his cock stretched you out. Without any preparation, you felt the sting at first, but it quickly turned to pleasure as he rocked himself in and out of you at a fast and harsh pace. You moaned as you clung to him, and Nikolai wrapped his arms around you in response.

The moment he entered you, Nikolai felt an instant relief, but he knew it would take more than that to fully rid himself of whatever plagued him. He never wanted it to be like this with you. He wanted you, of course, he had since you first joined his crew. But Nikolai wanted to court you properly, to earn your love, your trust, your body. He wasn’t even sure you felt the same way about him that he had about you. But, from the moment he got hit with whatever it was, you were the only person on his mind. 

“Saints,” Nikolai murmured as he bit your shoulder to stifle his own moans, “You feel better than I ever imagined.”

You gasped as he hit that sweet spot inside you at the same time his words left his mouth. Tears filled your eyes and emotions took over. All you could do was cling to him as he pounded into you. Moans filled the room as you felt your climax quickly approach.

“Nikolai… I’m…”

He just groaned as he picked up his pace until you came hard. Nikolai wanted to pull back and watch you cum, but at the same time he couldn’t break away from you even by an inch. Instead, he held you tightly as you gushed between your bodies and trembled in his arms.

“Darling…” he growled as he felt his own climax follow yours. And with just a few more pumps of his cock, he came deep inside you as he groaned your name and clutched you tightly. 

Relief washed over him like a cool rain on a hot summer day. Nikolai still felt the aftershocks of his orgasm, and his cock still remained hard inside you, but the urgency was gone. But, just as he was about to pull out of you, you wrapped your legs around his waist.

“You can keep going,” you whispered, feeling his hardness as well, “I’m ok.”

“But…”

“I trust you,” your voice was more firm as you pulled back enough to look in his eyes, “Do you trust me?”

“I do,” his reply came without hesitation.

The way you looked at him so sincerely made Nikolai’s cock twitch inside you, and before he knew it, he was thrusting in and out of you again. Your mouth dropped open in a loud moan, but he reeled forward and captured your lips with his one in another deep, heated kiss. As he locked lips with you, Nikolai felt his second climax quickly approach, and without pulling away once more, he came inside you.

You whimpered into his mouth as you felt Nikolai fill you up to the point where his cum dripped down your bodies, but you didn’t care. All you cared about was him.

Breaking away for air with a gasp, Nikolai finally got to look in your eyes as you were lost in pleasure. Lost in pleasure on his cock. Saints, you were beautiful like this. Once more, the need overtook him, and Nikolai pounded into you again until he came for the third time. But this time, he watched your every expression as you moaned and cried out his name.

Your eyes stayed shut as he continued to thrust into you, hitting your sweet spot over and over and over again until you couldn’t take it anymore. And just as Nikolai came for the third time, you did as well, crying out his name and clenching around his cock. This time was different though, for both of you. It felt less urgent, yet just as needy.

“Beautiful,” Nikolai murmured as he watched you fall apart in his arms.

With a gasp, your eyes shot open and your heart skipped a beat as you saw the expression of pure adoration on his face, “Nikolai,” you breathed as you cupped his face.

He gave you a weak smile as he mirrored your action, “I think I’m alright now,” he said softly as he slowly pulled out of you, “Thank you,” he hovered his lips over your, but stopped.

You had whined when he pulled out of you, but the disappointment quickly vanished when you felt his breath on your lips. Blinking your eyes open, you studied his face close up, closer than you ever had before. “Don’t tell me you’re shy now, Nikolai,” you quipped in a hushed, exhausted voice.

“I just…” he sighed, “I owe you.”

You smiled, “What about the wining and dining me then?” you asked with an amused huff.

That made Nikolai’s face light up, “I love it when you quote me,” his tone dropped as he finally kissed you, “And yes,” he murmured with a smirk.

[sapphicsaints]

omg i just discovered your blog and i’m in love 🥹 i instantly fell in love with tamar and i wish there were more fics about her out there (and tolya too, perks of being bi)

if you’re still taking requests, could you please write about reader possibly being a lantsov and grisha at the same time? maybe she’s super close with nikolai and tamar is like her sworn protector? idk, something with some angst (like reader getting hurt during an attack or something) but all ends well? i mean she’s the princess of ravka, she better survive 😅

thank you so much, and please, keep writing, i love your fics! 💙

I made a promise

Tamar x f!GrishaLantsovReader

A/N: Sorry this took me so long, I loved writing this thank you! I made this so it should hopefully fit with both the books and the tv show, and I'm still taking requests please send them :)

Warnings: Injury 

Word Count: ~2k

Summary: “She’s a handful.” He warned her.

“How bad could-” 

“Don’t say it.” He interrupted her, and she laughed. “You mean it, if she comes with us, you’ll swear to protect her?” 

“Yes.” Tamar looked a bit exasperated. “I will,”  

-

Y/n was the first Lantsov Grisha in a long time – but she was convinced by her mother to keep her powers a secret – and her heritage. Two bastards? Her mother had been busy. She was two years younger than her brother, and over time they’d bonded over many things, including their suspicious heritage. 

Unfortunately she didn’t gain his silver tongue. Her brashness and attitude got her into trouble at the Little Palace. As soon as she completed her military service, which she’d run away to do, just like her dear brother – they sent her to study in Ketterdam, at her insistence. The well compensated shipping clerk did put up a good effort, but she managed to get the truth out of him. Her brother got an earful when she tracked him down, mostly about how pissed she was he didn’t tell her, or let her go with him, and on and on. The guards that accompanied him were highly amused. Shu twins – she liked them immediately. Especially the girl, Tamar. 

“At least tell me where you’re headed next?” 

He sighed, “Novyi Zem.” 

“Take me with you when you come back?” 

“I’ll think about it.” That was a no. 

She set her best glare on him, “I guess I can’t follow in your footsteps forever. I heard they’re hiring in the barrel…” 

“No.” His voice was sharp. 

“Who are you to tell me what to do? You’re a pirate.” 

“Privateer.” He corrected me. “And that’s different from joining a gang.” 

“Renting out heart-rending services is different than actually joining a gang.” She rolled her eyes. 

“And how do you know they won’t hold you hostage?” 

“I’m good at hiding,” she blew it off. “Everyone thinks I’m in the southern colonies to recover from my ‘illness’.” He nodded, she had a point. “And I wasn’t exactly paraded around like you or Vasily. I’m the obvious bastard. Mother never cared” 

“Careful” he warned, she was treading dangerous ground. He still loved their mother despite everything, and she knew that. But she couldn't care less for them. They’d discarded her at the first possible opportunity, why should she waste energy on them? 

She took a deep breath. “I’m already doing it. There’s no point in trying to stop me now.” 

“Can’t blame me for wanting to protect you.” 

“I was infantry too” was her response. “I can take care of myself.” 

“And if you can’t?” 

“We’ll see just how much father thinks I’m worth.”

-

“She’s very insistent.” Tamar commented later that night. “You might as well let her come.” 

“She’ll be in danger with us.” Nikolai hedged. 

“But there is more danger in Ketterdam.” Tamar countered. “Especially for Grisha.” 

“Will you swear to protect her?” Nikolai said, half-jokingly, rolling his shoulders back and leaning against the railing. They’d set sail in two mornings. 

“I swear it.” Nikolai blinked once. The only sign of his surprise. 

“She’s a handful.” He warned her. 

“How bad could-”

“Don’t say it.” He interrupted her, and she laughed. “You mean it, if she comes with us, you’ll swear to protect her?” 

“Yes.” Tamar looked a bit exasperated. “I will, and I’ll teach her.” 

“You have no idea what you’ve gotten yourself into.” His head shook. Y/n’s already quite good with a blade and pistol, but under Tamar’s tutelage, she’ll absolutely shine. If she doesn’t kill her first.

“I like a little challenge now and then.” 

-

Nikolai ended up eating his words. Tamar and Y/n got along incredibly well, and ended up being absolutely lethal together. He made her repeat her story a hundred times before she came within eye-sight of the ship. A stray heart-render Nikolai found. Her Kerch is fluent, so they passed her off as being from Ketterdam. Also speaks Ravkan and Fjerdan. Y/n seemed to understand the seriousness of it.  

“Stray. Like I’m a scruffy dog.” 

“At least you get to keep your name. It’s common enough.”  He’d reasoned. Not her real name, one she’d already made up for herself. He was, but shouldn’t have been, surprised to find his sister had a few fake persona’s ready. 

“A serious question,” he asked her. “How did you track me down?” 

She looked at him like he was the stupidest human alive, and he was transported back to their childhood. 

“Pirates need to swim, Nikolai!” Y/n had jumped in the lake, her boots discarded on the bank. “See.” She waved her arms above her head, treading the water. 

“I’m going to be a privateer.” He scowled, pushing out the small ‘boat’ they’d built together. Random bits of wood they found around the castle. What looked like the top of Y/n’s wooden nightstand, sawed off, and strung together with some ripped up curtains. 

“Same thing.” She huffed. “Get in.” He slowly waded in, glaring at her the entire time. Saints, the water is freezing. Why did he let her convince him to come swim anyways? Spring is barely here.

“Why do I always have to push the boat?”  

“Things were easy back then, weren’t they?” She murmured, as if she’d seen the memory too. Easy. They didn’t know what the word ‘bastard’ meant, or why Y/n’s ‘powers’ were a secret, even from Vasily. Vasily - who didn’t give a shit about them. Never asked after Y/n once in his letters. Thinking about him would put Nikolai in an unnecessary piss poor mood, so he thought about the future instead. What it might look like out on the seas, but with his sister by his side this time. 

-

“Tamar, would you defend me if Nikolai tried to turn me into a broodmare?” 

Zoya spit her tea out across the table, right onto Y/n’s shirt, who jumped, grabbing a cloth napkin to try and soak it up, glaring at the squaller, who only looked at her incredulously. 

“Did she just say that?” Zoya turned to Genya, who looked at the possible broodmare, sucking in her lips to keep from laughing. 

“It’s a genuine concern.” Y/n protested. 

“Saints, Y/n.” Nikolai spoke from the door. “You’ve asked her that every day for the last week, always when I’m in earshot. Is there something you’d like to ask me yourself? You’d make a pisspoor broodmare. For the record.” 

“No,” Y/n leaned her head back, tilting slightly to meet Tamar’s eyes with an easy grin on her face. “I’d rather ask Tamar.” 

Nikolai let out a long-suffering sigh. One he saved especially for her. Zoya had watched the whole interaction closely. Nikolai looked both annoyed and amused. Tamar went along with it, almost like it was a joke between them. Between them. No matter how much she’d poked and prodded, neither would say anything about a possible romantic relationship. 

“I’m sworn to protect her.” Tamar had emphasized. As far as she knew, sworn protectors didn’t need to stand that close. Or glare daggers at any men or women who looked at her a bit too appreciatively. Nikolai didn’t seem to care about it. 

-

Everything happened incredibly fast. One minute, she was on her horse, laughing at a joke Tamar told, the next she’s in her bed with a pounding headache, and pain radiating through every inch of her. Hushed voices spoke in the background, quieting as soon as she groaned. Her mouth was dry, and even opening her eyes felt like too great of a task.

“Can you hear me?” A strained voice sounded, “Y/n?” She can, she can hear them, but she can’t do anything - can’t move, can’t blink, can’t speak. With great effort, she shifts her hand slightly. By a sharp inhale, she can tell the motion is noticed. Saints, why can’t she just open her eyes? Her consciousness flickers out slowly, and she drifts back to sleep, the hushed, strained voice still haunting her. 

-

Tamar could barely sleep, could hardly think beyond how she failed. She failed y/n, failed her promise to Nikolai, and now she’s lying in her bed - deathly injured, and barely awake. Healers have been there around the clock, doing everything they can to keep the princess alive. 

“If you hadn’t gotten her back when you did …” One of them said to her, shaking her head as she walked off. Tamar could’ve throttled the woman. Was that supposed to make her feel better? If anything it made her feel worse. Knowing just how Y/n was, just how close she still is. 

“Any improvement?” Nikolai asked, hands in his pockets, strolling down the hall. To anyone else, he might’ve looked nonchalant, but she could see the tension in his shoulders, the tight lines in his face. 

“Based on how you’re still pacing like a trapped tiger, I’d say no.” The attempted joke fell flat, both of them staring at the other. 

“I don’t blame you.” Nikolai said quietly. 

“That doesn’t matter.” Tamar stared back at the door, at the room she’d been kicked out of an hour ago. I blame myself, went unsaid. He didn’t bother trying to convince her otherwise, knowing it’s futile. 

-

“It’s been a week.” An unfamiliar voice spoke in a hushed tone. 

“I know.” Another said grimly. 

“I didn’t know.” Y/n grumbled, her voice hoarse. A shocked gasp sounded, and if she could she would have rolled her eyes. Saints, people are dramatic. At the moment, opening her eyes felt like the hardest thing she’s ever done, later she might admit she’s a tad dramatic. White ceilings, she squinted against the bright light in the room, hearing the sounds of curtains shutting. “That’s better.” She sighed. 

A warm, calloused hand gripped her gently, “Y/n.” Her voice sounded like a whisper, or maybe a prayer. She turned her head slightly, Tamar. At that moment, she decided that’s her favorite view to wake up to. One she’d like to see for the rest of her days. 

“Hi.” A half laugh half sob emerged from the woman’s throat, a grin fighting its way onto her face. “Don’t look so sad.” She pouted. 

“We need to see her.” An irritating voice grated against her ears. 

“You can see me fine from here.” She snapped. Her throat already feels rough and sore. From a few measly words. 

“Glad to see near death hasn’t dimmed your spirits.” Nikolai.

“So that’s what happened,” she mused. The mattress shifted, and Tamar sat next to her, hand still gripping hers. 

“I have to insist you clear the area.” The same irritating voice sounded, tittering across the room. 

“I have to insist you shut up.” She’s a princess, she can get away with this, right? “And leave.” 

Blood pressure skyrocketed from her left. Good, she’s glad she pissed the woman off. 

“Very well, your highness.” Footsteps padded out of the room, good riddance. 

“She was trying to help.” Tamar chastised, but she could tell she’s pleased. 

“You heal me.” 

She hesitated, but Nikolai snorted. “You heard the princess.” Y/n could sense there was something else Tamar wanted to say. 

“Nikolai leave.” 

“Glad to see you too.” He muttered, but sauntered out of the room. 

“I- I’m sorry.” Tamar said quietly. She looked heartbroken. 

“You have nothing to-”

“No.” She said insistently, “I swore to protect you.” 

“You what?!” 

“I made a promise to protect you, and I failed.” 

“Tamar,” y/n said quietly, “how did I get back to the castle?” 

“I brought you.” 

“What happened to the attackers?” 

“They’re dead.” Her voice hardened. 

“You did protect me. I’d be dead if I was out there alone.” Her hand gripped hers tighter. Y/n managed to raise her arm, with some effort, and kiss the back of her hand. A smile crossed the other woman’s face. “You didn’t fail.” She emphasized, and could tell Tamar didn’t really believe her, but something in her seemed to relax, a bit of tension left her shoulders. Tamar’s thumb ran over the back over her hand, and her heart started pounding and she bit nervously on her bottom lip and decided to bite the bullet, pushing up on her elbows. 

One hand gripped the back of Tamar’s head, pulling her down. A calloused hand gripped her cheek, meeting her halfway.

[infin1ty-garden]

VALENTINE'S DAY

˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳ ✦ summary: headcanons of the shadow & bone characters on valentine's day ˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳ ✦ character(s): nikolai lantsov, tamar kit-bataar, tolya yul-bataar, genya safin and zoya nazyalensky ˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳ ✦ warnings: none ˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳ ✦ word count: 752 ˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳ ✦ author note: NOT A MODERN AU! sorry some are a bit shorter

masterlist.

NIKOLAI LANTSOV

✦ He would overplan and over think every detail, he's worse than Genya

✦ Thoughts like "Which gift would you like better?" "An outdoor or indoor date?" "Maybe a date at the theatre?"

✦ He'd spent nights planning but nothing seemed right, Zoya knocked some sense into him. "I think they wouldn't mind all this expensive stuff, but you being there is enough"

✦ Would end up going simple, inviting you to dine with him

✦ The food would be some of the best you'd ever tasted

✦ After the dinner you would walk the gardens together, enjoying the fresh air when with his luck, he's being called back to the palace

✦ "May I have this dance," Nikolai intrigued by what your doing, takes you up on the offer

✦ The two of us danced until the meeting was on the back of his mind but eventually he had to leave but not without a kiss

TAMAR YUL BATAAR

✦ Tamar's mentality is more of "let's see what the day brings" but she does have some stuff planed

✦ The ship had docked in Novy Zem, a festival taking place near the docks. Tamar remembered you wanting to visit it

✦ The festival had carts lining the street with all kinds of delicacies from every corner of the world. Streets booming with colours. It was a beautiful site

✦ Tamar and you spent the day trying all kinds of food and just being around each other. She didn't mind spending all her money just for you to keep that lovely smile

✦ Then the both of you found yourselves in a local bar, singing songs you'd only learned the words to an hour ago

✦The day ended in a cot, somehow two people fitting in such a small space. You laying completely on her, sound asleep

TOLYA YUL BATAAR

✦ Tolya is the romantic out of the twins

✦ Still he would go simple being apart of Nikolai's crew means travelling a lot and that leaves out, a typical dinner date

✦ Living on a ship as well doesn't help. There aren't many places for a quite talk, let alone a date

✦ Instead he turns to what he knows best, poetry. He would spend days looking for the perfect book and then weeks annotating it. Underlining verses that reminds him of you or moments shared together

✦ He would invite you to the deck and by the time he did most of the crew were asleep. You thought he'd forgotten the holiday all together, you were wrong. He gave you a box of sweets he'd bought at the port in Novy Zem, along with the book

✦ You'd spent the rest of the night sharing the sweets and just enjoying each other's company

✦ When you finally had the chance to read the book, some of the poems described the stars lost in the night's sky, a sea of darkness, finding their true purpose upon the arrival of the moon. "You're my moon, the only purpose I need" (sorry it's cheesy)

GENYA SAFIN

✦ Genya would go above and beyond to make the perfect valentine's day date

✦ A picnic date if the weather calls for it with both of your favourite snacks, foods and deserts

✦ If it does end up raining a nice date indoors would be something she prefers over, a fancy dinner

✦ She doesn't mind dining in a expensive restaurant, but she thinks a more personal dinner at home, is better

✦ Genya would plan everything down to the last minute especially if it's your first valentine's day together

✦ She ended up getting her picnic date

✦ All kinds of foods were lined up in front of you as you enjoyed the sunny day and spending time with Genya

ZOYA NAZYALENSKY

✦ You would be the one planning the date and Zoya would act as if the holiday has little significance to her. You'd decided a date at a fancy restaurant was the way to go

✦ She'd loved it, the one you chose wasn't too crowded and the food was delicious. You'd talked about your future plans with one another, how your day had gone and so on

✦ After leaving the restaurant, the two of you headed somewhere a bit more reclusive to watch the fireworks

✦ Zoya too busy staring at the fireworks, didn't notice your hands putting something around her neck. Once she tore her eyes from the literal explosions of colour, she spotted a beautiful necklace. "Happy Valentine's day."

Thank you for reading!

[depressedbagpipe]

A Heartrender's Fire: ch. I

Tolya Yul-Bataar x Lantsov!ofc

Words: 3846 Warnings: tolya x tamar x irina being a chaotic trio, also sturmhond being sturmhond. canon-typical violence, mentions of alcohol and drunk people, brief mention of SA at the end A/N: again, idk what this is, but this is helping me get back into writing after so many months, so enjoy!

Series Masterlist Next chapter

I: No shelter but me

Very few times had Irina Lantsov wished she had actually followed her brother’s advice and stayed at the ship. This was one of those.

She ducked before the drunken soldier could slash her neck open, forcefully kicking his legs and making him fall back, accidentally smashing into a table that broke into a thousand wooden pieces, and left the man unmoving on the ground.

Irina grimaced at the sight, but couldn’t dwell on it much before yet another man was hurled at her. She was used to the constant bar-fighting, bottle-smashing, and table-breaking, but it didn’t mean she liked it. Even though she was perfectly capable of standing on her own, the fire in her veins always called to her, begging to be used, and it always took a toll on her when she couldn’t let herself go completely. She was used to it, anyway. And this was just another bar fight. 

The princess caught her twin companions with her eye, both of them on opposite ends of the bar, with fearsome looks on their faces and shining eyes as they too dodged and avoided the weak blows coming their way. The girl didn’t even need her axes; one look and the surrounding men cowered away. The boy was left alone in an instant too, his height too high and imposing that made even the drunkest know they would never be a match for the giant.

Irina expertly punched and smashed her way out of the tavern, avoiding the fallen traders, merchants, and sailors who had, unknowingly, chosen their fates as soon as they decided to launch themselves at the three Grisha.

“Well, that was fun,” grinned Tamar, once they had found refuge at the end of the street.

“So much for not bringing attention,” Tolya breathed out, not in exhaustion but in reprimand.

“For the record, he started it,” Irina defended herself.

Tolya counter-argued. “I don’t think Sturmhond will care about that, Ainthe.”

“Well, Sturmhond’s not here, is he?” Irina had a certain spark in her eyes as she spoke that made Tamar grin.

“And there’s no way he would know. Because we’re not gonna say anything, right, brother?” her gaze was lethal as both girls stared at the giant.

Tolya sighed in defeat, but eventually nodded his head. “Let’s just leave before they arrest us. One less bar we’ll be welcomed at.”

The girls grinned as they walked away in the other direction, leaving behind a mess of First Army officers and confused Zemeni citizens as they tried to explain how the entire tavern had ended up in shambles in a matter of minutes.

Irina took a deep breath as she looked at the street, with all the merchants and traders expertly scamming the many visitors the busy city received every day.

“It still baffles me how you don’t manage to gag every time you breathe here. The docks are nasty,” Tamar commented after eyeing the younger girl.

“It’s the smell of adventure, Tamar. I wouldn’t trade the taste of freedom for anything,” she replied.

“‘Let us appreciate life, for it only graces our fingers before it’s lost forever’,” Tolya recited, looking up at the clouds, a hand over his tender heart.

“Saints, not again,” Tamar groaned as Irina laughed, loving the little interactions she had with the twins.

“Always so delicate, Tamar,” Irina laughed, and even Tolya couldn’t help the smile on his lips.

“As much as I’d love to continue this conversation, we should go back,” Tolya’s statement was met with groans.

Irina complained. ��Already?”

Tamar backed her up. “But it hasn’t even been three hours!”

“Sturmhond will kill us if he finds out what we did,” he reminded them.

Irina frowned. “You’re bigger than him.”

Tamar nodded. “You could take him.”

Tolya groaned. “Nobody’s gonna take anybody, alright?”

“Where’s the fun in that?” Irina replied.

Tolya rolled his eyes. “The fun is that we all get to live another day, okay?”

Irina grinned, despite the constant bickering. As much as she liked traveling around new places, she ultimately loved the sea. Any excuse to go back to the Volkvolny, she’d take it.

It was only after they arrived at the harbor that they saw the First Army ship, unloading a bunch of boxes that would most likely contain weaponry. It wasn’t unusual for the presence of soldiers around the harbor and nearby taverns, but an entire legion?

The twins continued their bickering about bars and Fjerdans when a conversation between a First Army lieutenant and his soldiers made them stop in their tracks.

“Right, soldiers, listen up. Our fugitives are loose, but I have men blocking the roads, so their only way out is passage here, on a ship, in this harbor. We turn her in, and split the reward. But only if we stop them before they get on a boat. Is that understood?”

The officers yelled a chorus of ‘Yes, sir,’ before they disbanded, with the lieutenant walking back to presumably repeat the same orders to the smaller groups of soldiers perched around the harbor. Their uniforms were neat and put together, and the young faces of the soldiers almost made Irina shiver.

Tamar looked at her friends. “Sounds important… or dangerous. I can never tell the difference.”

She had one of her axes in her hand already, looking at it with care and mischief.

Tolya nodded, ignoring the sarcasm in her sister. “Definitely important. Come on.”

He grabbed his sister and pulled her back, knowing she was already going to pose some opposition.

“But–”

“No.”

Irina chuckled behind them, casting one last look at the army ship, hoping her disguise would be enough, and trailed after the twins.

–·–

Night had finally fallen over Novyi Zem when everybody was back at the Volkvolny. The harbor was empty, per Sturmhond’s request, and it was only a matter of time before a certain magic girl made its willing way up the ramp.

“I sure hope she falls for it,” Irina muttered under her breath. She was perched on the balustrade of the ship, looking at the crew as they loaded some of the boxes they had definitely not stolen from the First Army soldiers. “And how much longer is it gonna take? Weddle isn’t that big.”

“Maybe if you helped you wouldn’t be so bored,” Tolya pointed at her.

“Cute, but the second-in-command doesn’t load weapons; she uses them,” but their conversation was interrupted by Tamar.

“They’re here.”

Irina frowned. “They?”

And right on cue, a young couple appeared out of thin air and ran to their ship. The girl ran a bit forward.

“Hey, stop!” the crew looked at her. “We need a charter out of here immediately.”

Tolya and Tamar stood at the ramp, both receiving the girl and guarding the ship. Irina didn’t move from her place, but was looking down at the newcomers curiously, analyzing their every detail, just as her brother had taught her. The twins shared a look that Irina knew was a satisfactory one but waited for the couple to talk.

“I can pay,” said the girl again, bringing her hand to a small pouch by her hip and pulling out a beautiful hairpiece, one Irina recognized all too well. “It’s gold.”

Tamar took in her hand, feigning dubiousness, even bringing the object to her mouth and biting it to test its falsehood. With a shrug, she gave it to Tolya.

“That’ll do,” she said casually. 

“Come on then, hurry up. I’ll take you to the captain,” he said after inspecting the hairpiece too, with another playful smirk on his lips. 

The couple were quick to stand on the ramp, and Tolya was about to follow when the same lieutenant the trio had seen in the afternoon called after them. 

“You, stop!” he was pointing at the couple.

Irina sat straighter in her place, her eyes dancing between the soldiers, counting in her head how many were pointing their rifles at them. Her hands stood close, ready to summon if she had to, but made no other move. Tamar and Tolya didn’t even budge. She grabbed one of her axes and spun it in her hand, taking dangerous steps towards the officer.

“You want to fight, Ravka? Hey?” her axe stood inches away from the lieutenant’s neck. 

He recoiled and took a step back, fear evident in his eyes, pointing at the man whose hand had protectively grabbed the girl’s arm. Irina noticed that, because of course she did. 

“That man is a deserter of the First Army. He belongs in our custody.”

But Tamar hadn’t come to play. By that point, the entire crew was staring at them, waiting for the next move. “Is that so? All right then.” She turned, looking up at Irina. “Ravka wants a fight!” with her shout, everybody stood, dropping whatever they were doing and getting into position. Irina, regardless, kept being seated down, knowing that Tamar alone could do as much damage as an entire army.

“I don’t want to escalate the fight with Shu Han.”

At this, Tolya grabbed his katana and walked beside his sister. “We’re not with Shu Han. We’re independent.”

“Maybe you save your bullets for the war, old man?” Tamar mocked him. Even though the tension was escalating quickly, everybody knew, they were no match for the crew of the Volkvolny. They had the higher ground. “First Army needs to know its place.”

Everything that happened later was a blur. The soldiers left, with a generous tip on behalf of the ship’s captain, and they were all soon on their merry way. 

Irina and Tolya had taken the couple below deck, with the giant chatting happily about the majestic ship they all stood on and effectively distracting them of the speed the Volkvolny was sailing at away from Novyi Zem, and with Irina still looking at the newcomers with interest.  

Opening the door to Sturmhond’s cabin, Tolya spoke.

“Request for charter, Captain.”

Irina also walked into the room, sharing a knowing look and a nod with her brother, before standing beside him on the other side of his desk, full of maps, papers, and a huge picture of the Darkling and the Sun Summoner, hand in hand, as the most wanted people in Ravka.

The boy walked inside decisively. “Immediate charter.”

The girl trailed after him. “He means we need to leave right now.”

Sturmhond fixed his blue coat, adopting the imposing posture he was known for. And went straight for the kill.

“Let’s be clear about two things. I don’t take orders in my own ship. And we’re already underway,” he pointed to one of the portholes on his right. “I’m glad you’ve joined us. Now, maybe you’d be so kind as to give the room a little light. After all, you are Alina Starkov,” he fixed his eyes on the girl. “A 20-million-kruge Saint.” 

He grabbed his pistol and forcefully dropped it on the poster, with the canon staring directly at the young couple, every moment carefully planned out to let his guests know he hadn’t come to play, and that he had the upmost upper hand in the situation.  

“Dead or alive.”

The silence that filled the cabin almost sent a shiver up Irina’s spine. The air was thick with tension, especially coming from Miss Starkov and her friend. 

“No point in denying it, Miss Starkov. You are the Sun Summoner.”

She stood straighter at the mention of her title. “You’re right.”

She was quick to summon light with her hands, creating two smalls of pure sun that she held in her palms. Both Tolya and Irina tried to keep their composure, but they too believed in Saints. And they were standing right in front of one, who was coincidentally threatening Irina’s brother. Luckily for him, his too-clever fox face didn’t show any slight change. He whistled, still sat in his chair, lounging comfortably as if he was simply catching up with some old friends.

“Impressive. And it’s not often I say that.” To the untrained ear, his words would come out as sarcastic, almost venomous. But Irina knew better. 

Alina’s words were quiet but stern. “Let us go. Or you’ll be out 20 million kruge and a ship.”

The captain stood once again, chuckling lightly. “While I’m well aware you could consign us all to the watery deep, you should really consider how far from the docks we are.” He casually poured some kvas into a couple of glasses. “Besides, I’m not handing you over to the Fjerdans,” he took both glasses and handed one over to his sister, who had made herself comfortable at the only empty corner of his desk. 

Irina gladly accepted the glass, downing half of the beverage, still looking at the couple.

Alina frowned. “You’re not?” She even searched Irina’s face, searching for confirmation.

“Saints, no,” he stopped, checking with his guests. “Sorry, is it offensive to say that in the presence of a living Saint?”

Even Tolya shifted his weight at the captain’s words. The boy rolled his eyes, unnerved, and Irina shared a look with Sturmhond, both of them thinking the situation the most fun they’d ever had.

The captain sat back down, which made the boy follow his lead and sit on one of the chairs Sturmhond had on the other side of the desk. Alina stood behind him, only now Irina couldn’t tell who was protecting whom. Tolya kept guard by the door, frustrating Alina’s plan of escaping.

“Okay. What do you want with us then?” the boy tried to bargain.

Sturmhond wasn’t finished.

“With you? Nothing.” He eyed him down. “Honestly, I’m not even sure who you are.” Irina had to stifle the laugh that threatened to escape her lips. “But the Sun Summoner…” he pointed at the girl, looking at her as one would eye their prey. Because to Sturmhond, that’s what she was. “Well, you have to know you’re quite valuable.” 

The boy leaned forward. “You just said you wouldn’t turn her in for a bounty, pirate.”

“Privateer.”

Irina rolled her eyes, being a little too used to listening to that conversation.

“Oh.” The boy humored him.

“And what I said was I wouldn’t hand her into the Fjerdans. I said nothing of the Kerch or Shu.” He loved playing with his food before eating it. “I paid a small fortune to empty the dock and make sure you got on my ship. And, frankly, I think the Fjerdans are severely undervaluing you.”

Alina nodded, with a flash of determination. “You’re right. They are.” She walked closer to the desk and leaned on it, having the upper hand. Or so she thought. “Because you’ll be able to ask the King of Ravka for twice as much.”

Both Irina and Sturmhond froze in place. Their looks weren’t taunting anymore; they were cold and unforgiving. But none of them let it show.

“You know the King?” the captain asked Alina, who fired back.

“I’m the Sun Summoner.”

Tolya was greatly enjoying the conversation at the back of the cabin, analyzing closely Irina’s reactions. She was rather shocked at Alina’s words but liked that someone else was trying to put her brother into place as if he wasn’t already running ten steps ahead of everyone.

“By all accounts, the First Army have now turned their sights on Grisha. Thanks to what you and your conspirator did in the Fold,” he looked down briefly at the paper. 

Sturmhond’s sharp tongue had suddenly become poisonous.

Alina drew back. “The Darkling and I were not partners. You may believe otherwise, but once I tear down the Fold and reunite Ravka, the world will see I am not his ally.” Her voice almost broke. Even Tolya noticed it. And he knew she was telling the truth. “Help us and you’ll be rewarded.”

The Ravkan siblings were staring at her as if she had suddenly grown two heads. The prospect seemed impossible, but then again, a living Saint stood before them. They had seen stranger things.

“To tear down the Fold?” Sturmhond scoffed, but Irina still detected the hope that was now running through his brother’s mind. “And how do you plan on doing that exactly?”

Alina raised her head. “By hunting Morozova’s Sea Whip.”

“Alina.” The boy warned her, but she stopped him with her hand.

Instinctively, both siblings raised their kvas glass and took a long sip, mulling over their words. Sturmhond eyed Irina briefly.

“Well, I suppose if the Stag existed, the Sea Whip and the Firebird might as well,” he thought out loud, his gears turning. His eyes were glimmering. “You couldn’t do it with one amplifier, but two…” 

“Unburdened by General Kirigan, under my own power,” Alina continued, also feeling the hope in the captain’s eyes. He leaned forward on the chair, looking down at his feet, the last traces of his plan finally coming together. “Will you help us or not?”

Sturmhond stood up again, never able to sit still for too long. He looked at his sister, who wore a similar face to him, her consent being the only other thing he needed to embark on the journey of the Sun Summoner.

“There’s adventure, danger, money? Now you’re speaking my language.”

The siblings downed their glasses at the same time on opposite ends of the desk, finalizing the deal with a bright smile.

– · –

“What is the difference between a privateer and a pirate?” Mal, Alina’s friend, whispered to her, but not low enough not to be heard by Irina, who walked behind them.

Sturmhond led the way, stopping occasionally to acknowledge the crew.

“Hey, Ainthe, need a light over here!” Irina quietly made her way to a fellow sailor who couldn’t seem to light the candle, and thankfully for her, her brother called everyone’s attention, which allowed her to blend into the crowd for a second. 

Her fingers danced, and a light flame suddenly lit up the lamp the sailor needed. She retreated with a smile, knowing her brother was about to give a speech.

“All right, listen up, everyone! We have guests! The Sun Summoner and,” he turned to Mal, in the mood to mess with Alina’s grumpy companion. “Uh… You are?”

“Malyen–”

“A guest of the Sun Summoner!” Sturmhond interrupted him, much to Mal’s annoyance. “I expect you’ll treat them with all the respect I’ve come to know from you pack of liars and thieves.” The crew laughed at his words. Irina shook her head. He motioned them forward. “Come along, my darlings, come on, come on. Now, you can have the two in the back, it’s the most private suit we have.”

Sturmhond referred to the two fabrics arranged as hammocks, at the far end of the room and next to the stairs that led to the deck. It wasn’t cozy by any means; the room smelled of sweaty pirates, it was noisy and poorly lit, yet the siblings had grown accustomed to it, even if they slept at a different cabin. There was something about the mess that they could call home. 

Alina eyed him wearily as she walked past him, leaving her things on a nearby table, under Mal’s attentive gaze.

“See you in the morning, Miss Starkov,” Sturmhond said with a leisure bow, quickly leaving them to their fates.

“Sweet dreams,” Irina finally spoke, sending them a smile in a much kinder way than her brother had done, and trailed after him.

– · –

“I hope you know what you’re playing at,” Irina frowned as she looked at her brother.

“You caused a bar fight?” he stormed at her.

“We have the Sun Summoner and now what? The Darkling and the entire First Army will be after us, Nikolai, and we’ll have no way of escaping then,” she crossed her arms.

“An officer could have seen you, Irina! Your face could now be printed in the papers! So much for having a fake identity!” Sturmhond threw his hands in the air as he walked around his cabin.

“The entire country is tracking her. We’re supposed to be under the radar and now you want to shelter the most wanted person in Ravka? And not only that but what will happen when we go back?” she went on.

“You can break as many necks as you want when there’s nobody around who could get you into trouble!

“We are gonna be in so much trouble regardless!”

“Can you both stop having two separate conversations at once, please?” Tamar interrupted.

Both siblings turned to look at her, who wore a bored face. Tolya stood behind her, with a simple grin, enjoying the fight between the princes. The four of them stood at the captain’s cabin, away from prying ears, going over the details of their next steps.

“Tamar, back me up on this,” Irina implored her closest friend.

Tamar sighed. “It is risky, Sturmhond. I stood guard until we left the harbor behind and didn’t see any other ship sailing around, but those two are hiding something.”

“Of course they’d feel weary around us; they’d be stupid not to,” Tolya released a breath.

Irina took in one. “Why does this feel like it’s the beginning of the end?” she asked no one in particular. “And how did you even know about the bar fight?” she asked her brother, but quickly turned to glare at Tolya. “Was it you?”

Tolya raised his arms in surrender. “Not me.”

“You forget I have ears everywhere,” Sturmhond took another sip of his glass, raising his eyebrows in mystery. The two of them had almost finished an entire bottle by that point of the night.

“You saw us didn’t you?” Irina squinted his eyes at him.

Sturmhond scoffed. “No, I didn’t!”

“He’s lying,” Tamar interjected.

“Okay, yeah, I saw you. The bar was just around the corner as I walked back. Which is how I bribed everyone into forgetting you three were ever there,” he confessed. “And again, Ainthe, you can’t start fights with everyone who crosses you!”

“He touched my ass, Sturmhond, you can’t expect me to stand there and do nothing!”

“He what?!” 

Tolya suddenly appeared between them. “Alright, it’s best we stop. We’re all alive and well. And we’ll get to see another day for now, so let us sleep and rest and continue the fight tomorrow, okay?”

Nikolai and Irina shared a glance, a silent agreement both of them were too accustomed to. A silent way of communicating both of them had perfected over the years, which promised that they wouldn’t bring it back tomorrow. They knew they were too stubborn to allow the other to win, which would cause yet another endless source of bickering.

“Better be back on deck, then. We might need some fire,” Irina commented, taking one last sip of her kvas. “See you all in the morning.”

“Remember, just a spark, Fireball, not a whole bonfire,” Sturmhond called after her.

“Can’t make any promises!” Irina laughed one last time, before closing the door behind her, leaving an equally smiling Nikolai Lantsov on the other side.

Next chapter

[frost-queen]

The privateer’s sun (Reader x Nikolai Lantsov)

Requested by: anon, Forever tag: @missmelodramatic, @theletterhart, @alex--awesome--22, @elllie-does-the-posts, @floatlosers, @merlieve, @queen-of-books, @glimmering-darling-dolly, @denkisclown, @wildieflower, @meyocoko, @bubblybrianna, @justanothercoco @idkwhatmyusernameis,  @subjecta13-thefangirl, @m-rae23, @harleyquinnswifeyfrfr, @swampthing07​

Summary: Reader is a sun summoner as well under the command of Nikolai who you don’t get along with. When another sun summoner Alina Starkov boards Nikolai’s ship, you are overwhelmed with sudden jealousy. Back on land the little palace hold a ball to where you secretly hope Nikolai would dance with you, yet he chooses Alina over you. Over run with jealousy you take your leave only for Nikolai to chase after you, dragging you away to confront you. 

The boat rocked gently into the sea. The movement of water swaying around it. You were used to your sea legs now for being so long on the ship. You went through the door to the captains cockpit. Tolya and Tamar already there. Nikolai standing behind his desk, hovering over a map of the waters. Tamar cleared her throat loud to hint Nikolai of your presence. Nikolai looked up, noticing you. – “Ah Y/n, come!” – he said gesturing you over. You exhaled deep moving over to him. Once you were near the desk, he spoke. – “Can you light up a bit.” – he wiggled with his fingers, barely giving you any attention. – “It’s getting dark, and I can hardly read my maps.” – he chuckled, throwing you a witty smirk. 

You clicked your tongue, looking annoyed away. – “Poor eyesight.” – you commented on a mumbling tone. Tolya snorting loud as he overheard. – “What was that?” – Nikolai asked with a frown. You flattened your expression into a forced sarcastic smile. – “As you please.” – you spoke, mentally strangling him. You moved your fingers till a light appeared in the palm of your hand. Seeing Nikolai smile at his maps. You smirked letting the light shine brighter. So bright it filled the room with a blinding white light absorbing the room till nothing could be seen. 

Nikolai grunted, covering his eyes up with his arm, looking away from your glow. Tamar and Tolya also looking away. You absorbed your light once more, dimming it till nothing. – “I’m sorry was that too much.” – you outed teasingly. Nikolai fluttering his eyelashes to adjust his view. Nikolai jumped out of his skin when you set your hands loudly on his desk. – “I’m a sun summoner, not a candlelight to your pleasing.” – you spoke loudly making him swallow nervously.

Nikolai hummed mockingly. – “Here I thought you were a provider of light.” – he pouted his lips to taunt you even more. You rolled with your eyes, looking away. – “Watch your mouth… pirate.” – you countered, Nikolai gasping dramatically at your insult. – “Privateer! I’m a privateer Y/n!” – he corrected loudly as you could only smile, having gotten under his skin. Tamar rolling her eyes with a brief sigh. Tolya enjoying the tension rising between the two of you. You let your eyes go down on the maps he was overlooking.

“Fortune seeking?” – you questioned. He quirked up a smile. – “Why are you interested in joining?” – he teased. You snorted loud. – “It’s clear you need me thanks, but no. I’ll let the pirate hunt up to you.” – You laughed wrinkling your nose. Nikolai puffed his chest, crossing his arms. – “Well maybe I don’t need you.” – he answered. – “Good.” – you spoke turning around, making your way over to the door. Nikolai breathing loudly through his nose, hating that he did need you. – “It involves a lot of gold.” – he called out making you stop. – “Some dangers on the side and all the fun of an adventure. That seems like a deal worth taking… but I’ll leave that up to you.” – he lowered his gaze almost pitiful. 

You sighed loud, turning back. – “Well it’s intriguing, but to go with you it will put my life on the risk…” – you approached his desk once more. – “What percentage of the gold will I be taking?” – you asked smiling sweetly at him. Nikolai suppressed a loud groan of pleasure he could out right now from seeing that sweet smile of yours. – “Fair enough, you want some. I’ll give you seven.” – he responded making you laugh loud. – “Do you think I’m that foolish. Eighteen would just be fine.” – you said pressing your palms against his desk.

Nikolai laughed tauntingly. – “Why not just ask for all the treasures in my chest?” – he responded mockingly. – “Fifteen?” – you suggested leaning closer to him. – “Eight!” – Nikolai held on, leaning in closer too. – “Twelve?” – you pushed on. – “Maybe nine?” – He replied hesitantly. – “Ten!” – you commented practically all up in his face. Nikolai swallowed nervously caught by your up closeness for a second. Tamar and Tolya looking intriguing at each other. Suddenly aware of how close you were to him; you drew quickly back. 

Face flustered making you take a run for it. Nikolai sitting down breathlessly. Outside you touched your cheek for it’s temperature. The cold sea’s wind quickly cooling you down. You moved aside from the door, hearing movement. Tamar and Tolya stepping out. Tolya whistling loud while waving himself some cool. – “Now that was hot intense.” – he said, Tamar chuckling. – “It keeps the spirit lively with such bickering.” – Tamar commented walking up the deck. 

You overheard snippets of their conversation. Feeling the heat creep up again at the thought of Nikolai’s face close to yours. You turned away to the sea when Nikolai came walking out. His eyes falling briefly upon you before heading up to the higher platform. The wind catching his coat and hair. Peeking to the side, you caught him in all his glory. The sun setting behind him. Nearly gone to make room for the moon.

*

You gasped needing to see it for yourself. The new girl that had boarded the ship claiming to be Alina Starkov. She stood in Nikolai’s private room. – “I know who you are Miss Starkov.” – he said sitting at his desk. He hadn’t even looked up to acknowledge you having slipped into his room, coming to stand beside Tamar and Tolya. – “Sun summoner.” – he whispered teasingly with a smirk. Tamar looked over at you, watching your expression. Seeing how bitter your face began to stand. Alina puffed loudly. – “What are you a pirate?” – she replied with sarcasm. 

Nikolai chuckled catching you off guard. – “Privateer, there is a difference.” – he explained. The guy who was with Alina frowned. – “Isn’t it all the same?” – he whispered to Alina. Alina straightened her posture. – “Yes, I am the sun summoner.” – she expressed holding her hand to keep her friend back who clearly was against her confession. Nikolai smiled wider. She demonstrated lighting up the room. The light faded as Alina took a deep breath. - “You don’t have to worry I’m not going to sell you to Nyovy Zem.” – Nikolai said. – “You aren’t?” – Alina furrowed her brows. 

Nikolai got up from his seat, going around his desk to Alina. – “You’re a symbol.” – he addressed her with a flashing smile. The bitterness in your heart turning cold. Tamar seemed to notice it. Alina wasn’t the first sun summoner he encountered so why was he acting so warmly and teasingly towards her. There was nothing special about Alina Starkov. The only thing distinguishing her from you was that she was with the darkling. Trying to tear down the fold while he wanted to expand it.

You got so angry it made you clench your hand. Taking your leave with a loud exit. Nikolai looking behind Alina, seeing the door shut. He looked over to Tamar and Tolya wondering who just left. Tamar sighed dropping her shoulders down at him. Tolya moving his eyebrows up as if he should know. Nikolai furrowed his brows thinking till some realization slowly hit him. Having a slight clue of who it might be, yet he did nothing against it. You ran up to the railing, gripping tight onto it. Hands trembling as you so desperately wanted to scream your lungs out in agony. 

Rather wanting the sea to swallow you hole then have to listen to one more sweet word Nikolai said to her. Slowly losing it to jealousy you grunted waving your arms aggressively around. Needing to out it in a different way. Some of the crew members looking wary at you. You shot them a glare, threatening to blind them by moving your hand up till your chest to them. They swallowed nervously, quickly looking away. For the remaining day and later on time you kept your distance from Nikolai or Alina. No needing to put more oil on an already burning flame.

The sea made way for land. Roaming the halls of the little palace while preparation to tonight’s ball were fine tuned. The last set of flowers set in the ballroom. Passing quickly by you made your way over to your room. Nearly bumping against Nikolai in the hallway who was adjusting his cuffs. – “Oh.” – he outed looking up. – “Y/n.” – he said softly, eying you up and down. – “Should you not prepare yourself for the dance?” – he questioned. 

Tensing your jaw you felt your hand tremble, making you move it behind your back. – “I should as do you.” – you answered, Nikolai frowning. – “Clearly there is a lot of work to do on you.” – you teased, Nikolai bursting out in laughter. You caught yourself smiling instantly from hearing his laugh. Quickly dropping it as he caught a slight sight of it, half smiling. You bowed at him, taking your leave then. Nikolai looked over his shoulder to you, wetting his lips briefly. You went into your room, taking a deep breath. 

Feeling your cheek, it felt warm again. How was it that Nikolai was having such an effect on you. After sulking for half an hour, you truly needed to prepare yourself. Styling yourself with much effort. You joined the others following them to the ballroom. You entered as little people applauded for you. Coming to stand by the side, you noticed more applauded when Alina Starkov entered the ballroom with Mal by her side.

Already dunking a hole in your mood. Nikolai entered, surprisingly lifting your spirit up. He briefly made eye contact with you when greeting a few Grisha. You smiled shyly in return. – “Who will you open the first dance with, my King?” – a lord asked loudly of him. Nikolai chuckled flustered seeing all the attention on him. His eyes fell upon you, making you straighten your back unconsciously. He looked rather serious getting in motion. Your heart beating loud in your chest as his gaze remained on you, walking over. 

Breathing shallower you couldn’t believe he was making his way over to you. You smiled hopefully, nearly addressing him. – “Niko…” – you whispered, smile faltering as he moved past you, making you step aside. Heart shattering when he offered Alina Starkov his hand. Stumbling out of breath back, you felt like passing out. Nikolai walked back passed you, holding Alina’s hand. His eyes fixated on her. 

If your heart could cry, it would overflow the riverbanks and send waves of sorrow onto shore destroying all with the pain nestling inside of you. That pain forming into jealousy. How little eye Nikolai had for you ever since the arrival of Alina Starkov. Whatever made her more special then you? Both sun summoners, yet one forgotten while the other thrives.

Nikolai let go of her hand, taking a bow as she curtsied. They both waited for the music. A circle of people around them watching the king and the sun summoner dance. Music filled the room as it ached in you heart. Making you grasp for it breathlessly as if a hole was carving in it. Nikolai and Alina waltzed gracefully, only eyes for each other. A piece of your heart torn as it hurt so much. The way he looked at her made every sense in your body overheat with jealousy. 

It got so badly to the boiling point, you needed to escape before you would light up the entire room out of revenge. Nikolai and Alina had their palms pressed together, slowly turning as you slipped out of the room. Nikolai noticing you leave so suddenly. Tears stained your cheek making you wipe them quickly away. Overcome with such emotions you couldn’t hold it in anymore. Making your way away from the ballroom. – “Y/n!” – you suddenly heard. 

Nikolai had come into the hallway, calling out your name once he saw you. You ignored him crying even harder. – “Y/n!” – Nikolai repeated loudly coming to chase after you. Slowing down behind you. – “Y/n wait.” – he said grabbing for your arm. You swayed it forwards so his loose grip was off you. – “Y/n will you please stop.” – he asked wanting to reach for your arm once more, but you moved it out of reach. Nikolai tensed his jaw when you refused to listen to him.

“Y/n stop!” – he outed loud, grabbing you firmly by the arms. – “No!” – you answered, fighting with every might to be free of him. Nikolai tightened his grip on you, pushing you towards the side. Grabbing for the doorknob, pushing you inside the room afterwards. He closed the door out of breath. – “Why’d you leave so suddenly?” – he asked as you stood with your back at him. Wiping your tears away as you didn’t want him to know you were crying. – “You’d get your turn after the first dance.” – he explained not understanding you. 

You laughed foolishly at yourself. Have you truly taken upon the crown of fools. – “Don’t you understand!” – you spitted out, turning sharply at him. – “It’s not about… I never…” – you said uttering in such a messy state. Your mind all over the place as it pounded loud. – “You were looking at me!” – you outed trying to recall if you were correct. – “I thought… I thought…” – you said out of breath looking at him. – “You and Alina Starkov.” – you continued barely following your own train of thoughts. Nikolai simply smirked looking upon you.

“The first dance! With her!” – you called out in desperation feeling like you were losing your mind. Nikolai stepped up to you, moving his palm up your cheek as he kissed you teasingly. Eyes widening in shock as his lips retracted from yours. – “You were jealous I chose Alina for the first dance?” – he said still that silly smirk on his lips. It made you flutter your eyelashes rapidly to blink yourself awake. – “I feel flattered Y/n.”

He pressed his lips against yours again, catching you off guard. – “I would only dance with Alina once, the rest of the evening I would’ve dedicated to you.” – he spoke staring longingly at you. – “You would’ve?” – you asked shyly, Nikolai nodding as he brought his lips closer once more. – “To me there is only one sun summoner… and that is you Y/n.” – bringing your face closer to his, his lips crashed against yours. This time you surrendered by kissing him back. Arms going around his neck, drawing him closer.

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[steponmeinejghafa]

Beautiful Girl in a Broken World (TW)

Summary: All your life you have felt powerless against Aleksander. But when he takes things too far, you finally find your voice to stand up to him. Genya attempts to belittle herself, but you don't let her.

Genya Safin x fem!morozov!reader

Word count: 4.3k

Warnings: Crying, fighting, mentions of sexual abuse, toxic parent.

Note: You're adopted, so it doesn't get weird, I swear. And I don’t remember the catacombs scene word for word, so bear with me :’) also, y/n has a certain amount of selective mutism.

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Ever since you were a child, you had been a very quiet, gentle, and agreeable person. So quiet that you could slip out of a room of three people, unnoticed. So agreeable that you would commit a crime for anyone who you held close to your heart. So gentle that you couldn't bear to even think of raising your voice at anyone who made you feel bad.

Aleksander, your father, took these abilities for granted the very moment he realised how you could benefit him.

He kept you like a secret weapon, unleashing you carefully, using your abilities to his advantage. He gifted you to the Queen as her aide and deputy lady-in-waiting. He was twisted enough to use you as bait for the King, allowing him to do as he pleased with you as long as it meant Aleksander would remain General.

You couldn't say no as his rotten lips went over your skin, you couldn't push him away, because fear for yourself froze you in place, and fear of angering your father made all reason simply vanish from your mind.

Naturally, when the King tired of you, your convoluted father gave him Genya.

Sweet Genya who talked to you every day after you both helped the Queen prepare for her evenings. Kind Genya who always made sure you weren't left alone at mealtimes or during lessons. Beautiful Genya who had all the boys after her, because of her wavy auburn hair and unique amber eyes.

You were furious to find out what he had done. Till date you can remember the white-hot fury that had coursed through your veins as Genya arrived sobbing at your room the first night the King had forced himself on her. The way your skin prickled, your body threatening to unleash unforgiving darkness upon the land as you saw the blood on her thighs and clothes.

However, you still felt guilty about how you couldn't confront Aleksander about it. Still felt angry at yourself for being powerless under his heavy, dark-eyed gaze. Still felt so hopeless because the words died in your throat that day before they could escape your lips.

"What is it now, Y/n?" He had asked as you approached him timidly the next morning.

"Father, I heard that Genya had gone to the King's rooms last night," you had said, trying not to mumble.

"Yes," he had hummed, "She is my spy, Y/n. That doesn't concern you. Your time to serve as a spy for me has passed." With a wave of his hand, he had then dismissed you from the room.

You had wanted to tear out your father's eyes, wanted to scream how could you do this to her, to me? But you couldn't.

So here you were, outside your father's chambers while he punished Genya for deserting him on the other side of the door. Tears ran down your cheeks like rivers from your eyes, as you pounded on the door with your fists, your normally quiet voice raised to a shrill shout, calling out for your father to stop, calling out to Genya to see if she was okay.

He pulled the door open sharply and caught you around the collar, dragging you inside the room.

Your heart stopped in your chest.

Genya was weeping with her head buried in her hands, kneeling on the floor, quaking with fear. Black blood seeped from between her fingers as her shaky hands tried tailoring her wounds shut. You made a move to go to her, to put your arms around her and comfort her, but Aleksander held you back.

"Keep her in the cell," he said scathingly. "Tomorrow everyone will see her face. Everyone will be reminded of the consequences if they dare to try and double-cross me."

"No!" Genya screamed. It broke your heart.

You struggled against your father's iron grip weakly. "Father, no, please don't do this, I'm begging you!"

"Silence," he said sternly, as if you were just some otkazat'sya who he couldn't bother listening to, and you did just that.

Another win for him. Typical Y/n.

"Come," he said, beckoning you to where you knew he was keeping your grandmother.

Baghra. You adored her from the moment you had met her all those years ago. She didn't show it much, but you knew she adored you back. A rare phenomenon in her case. Aleksander had imprisoned her, just to work on another amplifier so he could defeat Alina.

"Sit down," your father ordered the moment you entered the room.

"Baghra," you whispered, trying to get her to look at you. "Grandmother."

She did look at you, finally, and gave a small nod of understanding towards you.

The guards had set up a second cage beside hers, and in that, they stuffed Genya. You made a noise of protest, but it was too soft for them to hear. You made eye contact with her and your e/c irises said it all.

I'm sorry.

You hoped she wouldn't look at you with loathing, hoped she didn't hate you now. Hoped that she knew how much you loved her, and that you would try your hardest to be heard, try to be a crack of thunder in a storm instead of just a gentle breeze on an autumn evening.

She looked at you like she always had, with warmth and adoration. Her blinded eye, too, somehow held that expression. It vanished, however, the moment the Darkling looked at her.

"Put out your foot, Y/n," your father ordered. You frowned and did just that, but you didn't see the mallet coming.

Aleksander nodded at the nearby guard, who took the mallet and swung it down onto your shin, shattering the bone with a sickening 'crunch'. You felt red-hot pain sear through your body, and cried out, clutching your leg gingerly.

"Why would you do that?" You screamed, shocking everyone in the room. No one had ever heard Y/n Morozova ever raise her voice. Hell, some of them thought you were mute. "I didn't do anything!"

Aleksander gestured at a Heartrender standing at the door, ordering him to extract some of the bone shards from underneath your skin.

"Hold her down," he ordered the guards. You thrashed about as much as your pain-riddled body would allow, sobbing uncontrollably. Both with pain and betrayal.

"Aleksander, stop this madness!" Baghra exclaimed as the Heatrender readied himself to remove the shards from your leg. "She's just a child!"

"A girl of nineteen is hardly a child," said the man with as much emotion as a teabag, speaking over your cries and screams of pain, as well as Genya's pleading voice. "Her bones are as valuable as yours, since she has some Morozova blood within her, and she is thus an amplifier."

"Do I repair the rest of her leg, General Kirigan?" Asked the second Grisha who had come in with the Heartrender.

Dismissively, Aleksander nodded, and the Healer set to work. However, with the missing chunks of bone, he said, "I'm afraid she will need a cane for the time being. If the cast doesn't work and she feels pain after the next one week, it means she'll have to use the cane for the rest of her life."

"No matter," shrugged your father.

How could he?

You waited till the Healer had fixed you up as best as he could, trying your best to ignore the pain which was still very sharp in your leg.

"What in the name of the Saints do you mean 'no matter', Father?" You scowled. "Does the fact that I'm a cripple now mean nothing to you?"

"Broken things are more fragile even if you fix them," said Baghra. "You know this, Aleksander."

"Y/n," Aleksander's voice was gentle and kind. He always did this. One moment he was the best father in the world, all kind words and sweet smiles, and the next, he was a monster in a man's body, watching as a stranger shattered his daughter's legs. "Think of how powerful we would be-"

"No," you said softly.

His gaze hardened. "No?"

You shook your head, "I'm done with your games, Father. This," you nodded at your leg, "This was the last straw. I cannot walk properly anymore. You mutilated the girl I love, and put my grandmother through things far too violent to recount. I loved you, she loved you, and Genya trusted you."

He rolled his eyes. "Where are you going with this?"

You knew you couldn't attack him. It would risk unleashing the nichevoya. So you used your words instead.

"Are you so oblivious?" You whispered. "All my life I have agreed with you, done as you asked. I let a man violate me in unspeakable ways, just because I did as you asked. You have used me, you have used my Genya, and you have used Baghra. You are a disgusting man, Aleksander Morozova. A disgusting man, son, father, and general.

Did you feel nothing when I came to you with blood on my nightgown, crying about the King? Did you feel nothing, when I said I didn't want Genya playing your spy?" Your eyes brimmed with tears. "Did you feel nothing when that guard smashed my leg and broke it like a stick?"

"Sacrifices for power," he sighed. "You are too young to understand."

"Age and eternity have made you emotionless," you shook your head. "They have stripped you of your ability to love, to cherish, to feel. You sacrifice to fill that void, you sacrifice because you know that alone, with your sins, you are not enough."

You felt fear seize your body when he caught you by the collar again and threw you nearly clean across the room.

"Learn your place, girl," he seethed. "I am your father. Never speak to me that way again."

You struggled to get to your feet, leaning against the nearby wall. Anger kept within for too long bubbled up within you, heating up into white-hot fury.

"My place, Father, isn't something you can dictate. This isn't Fjerda, this isn't the medieval times. I am a woman, a girl, a daughter. I have stayed silent for too long, letting you do with me, with others, as you please," you clenched your fists, darkness cloaking the room threateningly. "So, Father, do you ever want to say you're sorry? Will you try to make amends? Try to be a better person?"

"Quite the speech," he raised a brow. "But I am powerful, and no one will stop me from getting my Summoner. Especially not you."

He took you by the arm firmly and led you out, not caring that you were limping and hopping terribly. Genya cried out for you, begging him to be gentle, but with no avail.

"Stay in your room," he seethed, shoving you inside your room none too gently. "I have business to attend to."

You waited till he closed the door, and collapsed on your bed, screaming bloody murder into the pillow as you cried.

--Time Skip--

Night had fallen, and till then only one guard had knocked on your door to give you food.

"Cripple," he spat in Ravkan, making you nearly use the Cut on him in anger.

Your father hadn't returned yet from his twisted expedition, and you decided it was high time you broke your best friend and grandmother out of jail.

You knew that the guards deserted your corridor at exactly nine-thirty for patrol rounds. Quietly, or at least as quietly as you possibly could be, you snuck down the corridor to the room where you knew they were.

You slipped inside the room, and knelt in front of Genya's cage, breaking the lock with all your strength. It was rusty from lack of use, and came apart with the barest of snaps.

She avoided your gaze and covered her face with a hand, shrinking away from your touch. She didn't want you to see her this way. You found it odd, but shrugged it off. Naturally she wouldn't want to see you. You were the Darkling's daughter. She had no business looking at you the same.

"Please, get yourself to safety," you said quietly, moving away from her.

You felt hurt that she seemed to think you were like your father, that she seemed to fear you just as she feared him. You turned to Baghra's cage and broke the lock as well, feeling a little twinge of happiness on seeing her smile slightly.

You knelt in front of her like a knight would kneel before his King, ignoring the pain in your leg, and said, "I'm sorry for how my father has treated you. I'm willing to pay for his sins, I swear on it."

Baghra touched your shoulders gently, prompting you to rise. "Don't take accountability for Aleksander's sins, child. This was his choice, and he must pay for it. You are not defined by his actions, because you have proved time and again that you have tried your best to rebel against him."

You scoffed a laugh, helping her up. "I can hardly call cowering and giving unheard suggestions 'rebellion'."

"You'll understand what I mean with time, my dear," smiled the woman. She looked at Genya, who had laid waste to the table, save the bottle of amplifier which she now held in her hand.

You three escaped just barely, because your limp slowed them down. You apologised profusely along the way, and when they paused for a rest, you scoured for a branch which could double as a cane for you temporarily. When you did, walking became a thousand times easier. The entire journey, Genya didn't speak to you or look at you. Whenever you moved close to her, she'd scurry farther down the path, muttering to herself.

'I'm not like him,' you wanted to say. 'I'm in love with you, Genya, I'd never do anything to hurt you.'

But of course, the words didn't come.

Finally, you three came upon the hideout where everyone was. Genya was tackled in a hug by Alina, while you hung back, standing behind Baghra timidly. You knew you wouldn't be welcome there.

"Baghra," Alina said with relief, moving over to her. However, the second she did, the woman moved forwards to reveal your quietly standing figure.

Disgust painted everyone's faces and you saw people draw weapons, or, in the case of the Grisha, put their hands up defensively.

You didn't say anything.

Alina's piercing gaze was enough to make you want to shrink into the walls, and you nearly cowered with fright when she readied herself to attack.

"Alina," you were shocked as Genya spoke up. "She's harmless, don't worry."

"She's about as harmless as a viper," scowled the girl.

“Alina, trust me, she’s not like him,” said the redhead. “She’s the opposite.”

You put your hands up in surrender and shook your head, "I-I'm nothing like my father, I swear."

"I vouch for that," Baghra said with a nod.

"Fine," sighed Alina. She nodded at your leg, "How'd that happen?"

You cleared your throat and willed yourself to speak louder. "My father. He smashed my bone with a mallet to use as an amplifier."

"Saints," she scoffed, "That man is a psychopath. Tamar," she looked at the Heartrender, "Please see to it that she has a proper cane, and do help ease the pain a bit."

"T-thank you," you stammered, nervous of the girl who's eyes were no more scathingly trained on you. They were soft with concern, as she smiled slightly and nodded.

"Come on then," the Shu girl grinned, taking you by the arm gently. "Let's get you patched up better."

You nodded and followed her out, while Genya went to tend to Adrik.

Twenty minutes of excruciating pain later, your leg was mostly healed, but given the way it had been broken, they said there was close to no chance for your complete recovery.

A Fabrikator named Viktor fashioned a cane for you from the branch you were using. It was jet black, of course, with an intricate design of roses etched into the wood from the handle till the bottom which had a cap of silver on it.

You thanked him and Tamar smiled at you.

“Truly, you are unlike your father,” she said.

You blushed shyly and softly replied, “I’ve never found cruelty to be my area of expertise.”

Tamar patted your arm and helped you up, making sure you were putting your weight on the cane and not your leg.

You went to check on Genya, who, upon seeing you, fled from where she was sitting in front of Adrik, helping heal his hand.

“G-Genya?” You called out after her, your voice barely raised at all as you limped after her with as much speed as your leg would allow. “Please wait a moment, please.”

You both stopped dead in your tracks, when you ran into the Queen.

“You!” She gasped. “Guards! Guards!” She cried out, looking around frantically for them, her pale hair fluttering around her face.

She caught Genya by the wrist and seethed, “You both will pay for what you did! You monsters!”

“Please-please leave her be,” you pleaded, limping closer to the Queen, resisting the urge to beat her senseless with your new cane.

“Well,” she glared at Genya, “At least now you look like what you truly are,” she turned to you, “And you deserve to be crippled, you repulsive girl.”

“I-“ you faltered. You deserved it, didn’t you? You tried not to cry, as you gathered your thoughts, saying, “Please let her go,”

Genya yanked her arm out of the Queen’s grip, having had enough.

“Ask me how I did it,” she said, with venom in her voice. “How we did it.”

Your heart leapt. She mentioned you in passing, that was good. Perhaps she didn’t hate you after all.

“What?” The woman was baffled.

“Ask. Me.” Genya said forcefully. The queen made a nod as if to ask, and the redhead continued, “Y/n made the poison. She wanted her revenge anyway. So, I put it on my body, for weeks. So that every time he touched me, every time,” her voice lowered to a hesitant whisper, “he kissed me, he would take a little bit into himself.”

“All he had to do was stop coming to her bed,” you softly added in.

Seething, the woman replied, “He was your King,”

“He brought it on himself,” Genya spat.

“He took advantage of innocent girls, girls who couldn’t fight back, because he was our King,” you limped forward to stand beside Genya, mustering up courage to look the Queen in the eye. “It was because he was our King, we were terrified to speak. Because no one would’ve believed us. And even if they did, they couldn’t do anything about it. So do you blame us, your Highness, can you blame us, for taking matters into our own hands?”

“Oh? The Darkling’s mute little puppet girl speaks,” scoffed the queen, making you shrink back with shame. That tone stung you hard. Where they never took you seriously, where people only saw you as a pushover who had no voice. “You both are monsters, murderers.”

“Madraya,” Nikolai’s smooth voice was a saving grace in this fight.

“Nikolai! You heard them, arrest these murderers!” She said, looking at her son.

He looked horrified. “No,” he shook his head. “Not after what I heard.” He looked at her with disbelief on his features. “Both of them were under your protection.”

“They are servants,” she scoffed in disgust. “And the cripple is a puppet for the enemy!”

“And you, the Mother of Ravka,” he said. “Your subjects were to be like your children. All of them,” he placed a hand on your shoulder and brought you forward. Your eyes stayed riveted on the ground. “And Y/n? Just by being here, she has shown that she is no puppet for the Darkling.”

The Queen huffed and flounced off, skirts billowing around her as she did.

“Thank you,” you nodded and moved back, when Genya turned to leave.

“I’m sorry,” said Nikolai.

“It’s not your fault,” said Genya, as she walked away.

You limped after her, calling out her name in vain. However, you cornered her at last in her rooms.

“Saints,” you panted, your leg aching horribly. You leaned your cane against a wall and tried catching your breath. “Saints, that hurts.”

“Y/n, please leave,” she said, packing up a bag for herself.

“No!” You said, annoyed. She looked at you at last. “No, Genya, I won’t leave.”

"Why not?" She scoffed. "Look at me, Y/n."

"I always am," you said. "I am always looking at you, Genya."

"Are you, now?" She laughed drily. "Honestly, Y/n, you don't have to pity me, alright? We aren't on the same boat, if that's waht your thinking."

"I have always thought we were oceans apart, Genya. With you all confidence and kindness, while I shrank away from the slightest word spoken to me," you said, your e/c eyes shining in the dim light, making it look like they had stars in them. "But that didn't stop me from loving you."

She looked at you incredulously, "Loving me?"

"Yes," you smiled, limping over to her hesitantly. "Since the day we met, I never stopped loving you. And this day is no diffferent. Scars or no scars, you, Genya Safin, are stronger than Grisha steel, and more beautiful than anyone I have ever encountered. You are a beautiful girl in a broken world, and-and if anything, your scars make you more beautiful in my eyes. It would be my honour to say that I am yours, Genya."

She stepped closer to you, taking your hands in hers. "Can you bear waking up to a scarred old face beside yours every morning?"

"It isn't something to bear, because burdens and problems are what we bear. This is no problem. It is a trophy, a symbol of your victory and strength, my Genya," you smiled. "I understand if you wouldn't want me, though."

"Why wouldn't I want you?" She asked. You were too oblivious, in her opinion. Had you forgotten the nights you both slept together, wrapped up in each other's embrace? The times she'd kiss your forehead to make you feel better? The times she hadn't denied it when people asked her if you and her were a thing?

"I am a cripple now, Genya," you accepted it with a shake of your head. "You protect and care enough for people. I don't need you doing that for me, because it would just add on to your own personal burdens.”

Genya came closer to you, taking your hands in hers. Her seeing eye was a deep gold in the dim light—a shard of the setting sun sparkling with love.

“Have you never noticed that I am in love with you?” she asked, making your heart leap. “Do you know how many times I’ve kissed your forehead, wishing it was your lips? Wishing that we could embrace with just the sheets between our bodies?”

“Um…” you felt yourself lean on her palms slightly. “Sorry,” you nodded at her hands clasping yours a little tighter now, with the weight on them. “But why did you run from me?”

“Don’t be sorry,” she smiled sadly. “I ran because I thought that you would find me ruined now, with this.” She touched her fingers gingerly to her scars.

“Never,” you shook your head, shifting your weight to put more on your good leg, so you could hold her face in your hands. “My Genya, you should never think you aren’t the most gorgeous woman on the face of this planet, because Saints alive, I have never seen a woman so kind, loving, and caring as you. It shows on your face, and it only makes you more breathtaking.”

In the dim light, you saw her blush, just the barest dust of pink under her skin.

“That’s probably the most you’ve spoken in your whole life,” chuckled the redhead, leaning into your touch. It startled you, and in turn, made you blush a rather unsubtle red.

“I-um,” you tried pushing out the words which wanted to leave your lips so desperately, but all you could do as she stepped closer to you was exhale softly, “Genya…”

“That’s the first time you’ve said my name that way,” she smiled, looking up at you slightly as her hands rested on your waist. Her gaze skirted down to your lips and to your eyes as she asked, “May I?”

Your heart leapt, the words struggled again. You nodded wordlessly and she tilted her head up, pressing her slightly dry yet soft lips on yours. The words came again as you both stood there in the dingy underground room, just kissing.

Your heart pounded in your chest, your thumbs stroking her cheeks as you prayed to all the Saints that your palms weren’t sweating. You wanted this moment to last, this first kiss to extend into forever. The world faded around you, the panic of your father’s attack, the fear you felt in front of the Queen, all forgotten as you focused on Genya.

I love you, I love you, I love you.

The words didn’t come, they failed you again. But you didn’t mind this time.

You smiled against her lips, and kept your e/c eyes riveted on her as she pulled away, her face finally cracking into a large, bubbly grin.

You let your hands fall from her face and held her hands in yours, trying not to giggle.

“Did we just do that?” She asked.

Wordlessly, you nodded, folding your lips into your mouth as a loud, childlike giggle threatened to escape your lips.

She leaned up to kiss your cheek and whispered in your ear, “Perhaps we could work on your voice sometime?”

“Um,” you nodded your head and asked, “Would-would you help me?”

“Of course, Y/n,” she smiled.

“I-I’ll speak a hundred words a minute for-for you,” you said, out of breath suddenly. “It will just take some time…”

“We have all the time in the world, my love,” she brushed her thumb gently over your bottom lip, causing a shudder to go down your spine.

You took her hand and kissed it gently, before pressing another kiss to her cheek where her longer scar was.

“All the time in the world,” you repeated with a smile.

She nodded and took your hand, holding it while you grabbed your cane and the both of you walked out of the room, back to where the others were.

As the torchlight cast long shadows on the wall, and you sat beside her silently while the others gave strategies on their next move.

Ever so often you would glance at Genya, who wore a thoughtful look on her face. The dim torchlight fell from behind her, highlighting her profile in gold.

‘Why have you condemned her to suffer such hardships?’ You silently asked the Saints. ‘Why do you make every effort to make her suffer?’

The answer was a simple one, which you could practically hear those damned Saints reply.

Because fate isn’t kind to those who have beauty like hers.

Because she is a beautiful girl in a broken world.

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This one was so sad to write- but I hope you enjoyed it! I am accepting requests, so feel free to send over an anonymous idea or send me a dm <3