#tagging so my friends who are avoiding spoilers can hide~

[chuplayswithfire]

I just get so frustrated when people bring up, bury your gays about Izzy, when that usually should apply to people like Tara Maclay, who was written purely to die!! Like there's so many actual examples, you don't need to have the little nasty rat man being an example. Because he's not. Also, while I'm at it did they really have to ruin WeeJohn's scene with fucking Izzy singing Jesus Christ can't you have someone else singing? I want to focus on Wee John I actually fucking like him.

LMAO ANON YOU ARE LIVING IN MY BRAIN my biggest annoyance about Izzy singing is that I was like "now i KNOW this little man didn't interrupt calisto's entrance!!!!!!" i was so mad. what the fuck. let Wee John have his MOMENT, the biggest moment possible! who let that stale bastard interrupt. who wrote that.

but yeah for real bury your gays has actual real instances. izzy is just a gay(?) guy who was killed. he wasn't doing anything gay when he died, he wasn't killed for being gay, he just was gay while dying. izzy fans should have considered not falling in love with someone with so many death flags.

[wings-of-ink]

Hello, my friends!

Just wanted to pop in with some info and updates.

*The "Cursed Birthday" won the 2k follower celebration poll. Sorry dads! I don't have an ETA for that just yet. I may write it here and there until the end of the year as the motivation strikes. I think the easiest way to tell the tale would be from Oswin's POV or even a shifting POV between him and Da (Kip). I'll decide for sure once I begin to write it. Also playing with the idea of doing this in Twine to make it playable. That way you could put your MC's specifics in for maximum emotional damage.

*I will still write things about the dads though, so all my Papa and Da fans out there won't be left in the dark forever.

*I will be "patching" Chapter 5 in the near future. I redid Zahn's scene (again) which gave me such a headache on release day. I formatted the beginnings in a much more streamlined way and fixed some bugs. When I have more time to sit and go through error reports, and make more corrections to typos, grammar, and code - then I will put the patch through.

*All chapters will be getting a scrub for issues in the text in the coming months. I will do my best to find them, but self-editing is very difficult (there's good reason that professional editors exist). In the future, I may need to ask for testers/editors.

*ASKS will be changing a bit. I do not know the full extent of how because it's a trial by fire. The rules will be updated as I come across things. But, here's why:

Spoiler prevention - as much as it is possible, I want to limit spoiling content for both new and existing readers. Not just for the plot points that are developing, but also for our mystery suitor who will have a lot of unraveling in the coming chapters. I will probably make a specific tag for answers that may contain spoilers, but some of the issue is the information in the Ask itself, which I can't hide. I may opt to compile these in a big post like once a month or so. This way, if anyone does not want to see anything spoilery, it's easier to avoid.

Time management - reaction asks specifically will remain limited and they will honestly have to be a lower priority depending on the condition of my inbox. I am very sorry for this, but these can take an inordinate amount of time. I write this IF in my downtime from work and personal life, and I also use those moments to manage Tumblr. I need to balance those so I can work toward releasing more of the IF.

Patreon - I still plan to give Patreon a go probably starting January. This will help me fund things for the game, such as art, and help me justify spending even more of my time writing chapters and extras. But like everything else, I will need to allot time to work on these things.

Personal Development - I'm taking a coding class! I can work on it at my leisure and it won't take a ton of time during the week, but it will take me out of my Tumblr time a little bit I think. Fingies crossed, I will learn a lot that will help me code a better game for you!

*Inbox - I have several Asks awaiting responses about chapter 5. As noted above, I am holding these due to spoilers to give readers a chance to catch up. (I may opt to compile these in one large post.)

Anyway, that's all for now (it's at least all I currently remember, lol).

Take care, all!

~Lunan ^_^

[irisintheafterglow]

The Archer (gojo x you)

summary: after your best friend becomes viewed as a monster, the only thing to do is cling to the ones that loved him too. (or, screaming who could ever leave me darling, but who could stay?)

wc: 1.1k

cw/tags: hurt/comfort, angst but heartwarming ending, manga/anime spoilers, established relationship, pet names (babe, baby, sweetheart, etc), mention of vomiting but nothing descriptive, yeah did i mention angst

note: i just need to hold gojo satoru and tell him that it's going to be okay is that too much to ask for (anyways hope you enjoy the pain that my brain farted out)

likes/reblogs/feedback are always appreciated <3

“Su?” He freezes, rooted in place as the sun casts shadows on his unreadable expression. “Where are you going?” He sticks his hands into his pockets and turns to you with a smile so fake you need to take a step back. He'd lost a lot of weight but what terrified you the most was the calm aura that surrounded his weakened body, a contentment that was scary to see on someone in so much agony.

“Mission, just a few Curses plaguing a village of about a hundred.” Forcing normalcy into his voice was as successful as forcing a square block into a round hole and you couldn’t stop the worry from leaking onto your face. “Why are you looking at me like that?”

“Because I had another dream.” His face falls, washing over into careful blankness. He was used to this, your technique and the consequences it brought. It was, however, a long time since you confronted someone directly about what you see. “You know, Future, it doesn’t show me what will happen.” He won’t meet your eyes and you hesitantly take a few more steps toward him.

“It shows me what can happen.” 

His words are cautious, delicate as if saying the wrong sentence would break you like a fragile piece of pottery. “And what did you see?” 

“Something that I’m begging you not to fulfill.” You swallow the lump in your throat and blink back the fear threatening to spill over from your eyes. “I’m so scared, Suguru. I’m so fucking scared.” You stumble the rest of the way forward and his arms wrap around you instinctually, holding you tightly as you continue to plead for him not to go. He pulls away to look at you and a sliver of hope pokes the back of your mind when you see the conflict in his eyes. It disappears as resolve hardens on his face. 

“You’re family. Whatever I do, I will not harm you.” 

“I need you to promise you won’t–”

“I can’t promise anything beyond that.” After a moment you have no choice but to nod, defeated, and he pulls away for the last time. “You have my word.”

The news hits you like a train that you saw coming ten miles away, knocking the air from your lungs and sending shards of invisible shrapnel into your body. Because of your technique, you know before everyone–Yaga, Shoko, Nanami, the higher-ups, Satoru. You feel the moment Suguru makes his decision in your own body like cruel twin telepathy and you rush into the nearest bathroom to expel everything you’d eaten that day. You feel the same sensation again when word reaches Yaga, the whispers of massacre and Curse User and traitor seeping into your ears. Nothing, however, could compare to the storm you felt when Yaga told Satoru. 

You fall asleep early in the days after Suguru leaves. Not because his absence didn’t keep you up at night, but because you didn’t really know what to do except hide in dreams. Dreams that kept you in a state of blissful ignorance; you, Suguru, Satoru, and Shoko at the fair or the park or the beach, not scattered into four separate corners by indifferent Fate. Suguru’s departure felt like a severing of your soul, like your brother died rather than your best friend leaving. You avoided others like prey escaping a predator, paranoidly checking reflections in windows for people you didn’t have the energy to talk with and ducking behind corners when voices got too near. When the few missions you completed were over, you were back in bed, curled into yourself so tightly that no one could reach you. 

No one, at least, except Satoru.

He calls you some nights later and you squint against the harsh light of your phone screen. 

“Satoru?”

“Hey, Sleeping Beauty.” There’s a forced smirk in his voice that you see through like glass, immediately noticing the way his pained tone wavers with every uttered word. “Did I wake you from your beauty rest?”

“Mhmm,” you hum exhaustedly, groaning as you sit up in the darkness and swing your legs over the side of your bed. “Door’s open if you need it.”

“Yeah…okay.” The melodically teasing tone in his voice drops in an instant, as does its volume. You make sure there’s an unopened bottle of water ready for when he gets to your dorm. He was probably just as dehydrated from sobbing as you are. “I’m sorry.” 

“For what, love?” 

“Waking you.” You laugh softly, rubbing your eyes and sitting back on the edge of your bed. 

“No, you’re not.”

“You’re too good at that.”

“What, knowing when you’re lying? I thought we weren’t supposed to lie to each other. Relationships 101.” He huffs as much of a chuckle as he can. “What are you really sorry about, Satoru?

His voice cracks and your heart feels like it’s been stabbed a hundred times. “I need you. Really badly.” There was no suggestive air or promiscuous tone in his voice, just unfiltered desperation not to be alone. “Can I–”

“Of course. Get over here; I miss you.” 

You time the duration it takes for him to get to you, two minutes on the dot. He opens your door slowly as if to check if you’re still awake, and shuts it just as gently. You flick on your nightstand lamp and feel your stomach sink when you fully take in just how tired he looks. There’s no trace of anger or frustration on his face, only pure loss. The bags under his eyes deepen as he sighs, avoiding your eyes for the first time you can remember. He just stands there in the middle of your room, deflated and suffering. When he speaks, it’s a strangled and helpless choke. 

“I couldn’t–”

“Shh, just come here.” You rise from your bed and catch him when his knees buckle, his face buried in your shoulder. He doesn’t cry or heave like you did; he just grabs whatever he can with his hands and holds you so needily his arms start to tremble. “I’m right here, baby. I’m not going anywhere.” 

When you finally slide under the covers with him, he’s still clinging to you like you’d float away if he let go. “Stay.” He pleads with you even as you have him locked against your chest, gently carding your fingers through his hair. It’s soft between your fingers and reflects the little moonlight seeping through the cracks in your curtains. 

“I will.” You press another kiss to his forehead as if to seal your words, but he doesn’t feel safe yet. 

“Please, stay.” 

“I swear on my life that I will not leave your side.” You try to lace Cursed Energy into your words, make them as unbreakable as you command them to be. Squeezing your eyes shut, you breathe him in, willing him to let himself go. To not be the honored one or the strongest sorcerer, but Satoru, to break down and grieve just as any other man would. 

“I’m so sorry.” There it is, baby. Just let go. 

“I know, sweetheart. Rest now, I’ve got you.”

if you enjoy my writing and would like to support me, you can buy me a coffee on my ko-fi! you can also check out my full masterlist here :)

[sillymillipede]

I've been thinking about a Ark & Magnus Archives crossover so much and I've finally gathered my thoughts. Major spoilers for both beyond the 'keep reading'

Tagging people who mentioned being interested in my yapping @katie-the-bug @rainesaur

I really want to write something, and it might just be short stories about some of the characters, but the general idea of what I want to do is the Ark story but the fears are there. It would be cool to rewrite the story of Ark and considering how the fears might influence the story or the characters' actions but I doubt I have the energy for that. I'm sure there's a lot of interesting things I could do with Earth getting corrupted by element too. Maybe it somehow caused a less intense version of the apocalypse in Season 5 as well, because of a failed/partial ritual.

Element is somehow related to the Web. It could be related to a lot of different things, but I think the main thing I want to focus on is how it seems to be somewhat alive and convincing people to use it I’ve been mainly thinking about associating fears with Ark characters and this is what I’ve got so far (based on vibes.)

Helena - The Eye The Magnus Archives Wiki says that the Eye includes "drive to know and understand, even if your discoveries might destroy you" and I think that fits Helena really well. (This could fit Rockwell too) In the beginning her motivation for exploring the Island is to learn all she can about the animals there, and later turns into her finding out that the Island is stranger than she realized. One of her motivations throughout the story is to find out the truth about what the Arks were made for and she is putting herself into dangerous situations just to discover more. On the Island, if she had never started to search for more knowledge of what it was, she never would have gotten captured by Nerva and put in a life threatening situation. Despite that, she wouldn't have changed anything, she couldn't have ignored the desire to know more about the island.

In the end, I doubt Helena fully becomes an "avatar" like Jon did, in the notes, Mei tells Helena that she's starting to sound like Rockwell, she decides that she will only use the prism to save her friends, and not to make a discovery about the Arks.

Not sure how I'll include the Homo Deus in this but I'll figure that out if I do decide to write something. Homo Deus Helena is watching over all the Arks, and the character you play as in-game. Maybe in this story, the Homo Deus/One Who Waits really is the Ark version of an archivist, though I doubt Helena would like the whole "feeding on fear and haunting nightmares" thing.

Rockwell - The Web I was going to say the Corruption because “haha funny Ark reference” and just based on physical appearance the Eye or Flesh might work but finally I decided he had to be the Web. He’s manipulating everyone he meets. Nerva, Timur, The Tek survivors, some of the graduate students, Gabriel, etc. He hints at the Obelisks being weapons to Nerva even if he knows they might not be, because he knows that’s what Nerva wants to hear and that’s what will get Nerva to agree to investigate them with him. He allied with Timur just to convince him to fight the Manticore and then steals the element and poisons him. He hides his true intentions from Helena and Diana so he can get what he needs from them. Pretending to be a “kind old man” so he can get their hospitality and supplies and avoid suspicion. And he’s secretly the one behind all the issues on the Genesis Ship and in the simulation. The branching arms and tentacles of Rockwell Prime resemble a web.

In this version of the story the Element itself is manipulating him too, he says he hears it calling to him in the notes.

Nerva - The Slaughter The guy who started one of the first large-scale wars mentioned in the Island notes would be associated with the entity related to war and violence. Nerva thinks that the gods brought him to the island to bring order, and in this version of the story, he will soon realize that while "the gods" do want him to keep causing wars, they are not any of the gods he knows. He gives the Slaughter the violence it wants, and he and his army become strong enough for him to accomplish his goals.

Meiyin - The Hunt I'm sure the hunt really loves the Arks, because now humans are afraid of being hunted a lot more often. It's the fear of being hunted and being prey, and who better to represent that then the character who has gained the reputation of being the "beast queen" because of how she fights and hunts with her tamed dinosaurs

There is also her desire to find and kill those who have harmed people she cared about, and people she was trying to protect. She said she would follow Nerva to whatever Ark he travelled to, if she hadn't killed him in the Tek cave.

In this version of the story she has the ability to communicate with her pack of dinosaurs, and while she won't be able to have full conversations with them or anything like that, she can understand them and how they are feeling even more than she could in the notes.

Santiago - The Extinction (which I know some might not count it as one of the entities but it counts in my heart okay) Obligatory "Extinction? Is that an Ark reference?!?!"

Santiago could be part of the "oops I caused the apocalypse club", while it wasn't him specifically who did it, in the notes he realizes that the Element corruption came from the Element War, which was fought using weapons he designed, and he seems to think he's responsible for it. He even says "Either I'm a horseman of the apocalypse, or I'm nothing at all."

And by the time of the Element War the Extinction could have been around for long enough to be like the other entities. It includes the fear of humans causing their own extinction, and while humans don't go extinct in Ark, Earth ends up being destroyed by their actions. There are no humans left on Earth until Santiago and the others have arrived. It also includes the fear of humanity being replaced by something else, which I could stretch to include how most humans alive are clones of people who have already died, aside from maybe some people on the colony ship.

I don't have a lot of thoughts for other characters. I could say Diana had an encounter with the End, considering how she died and was resurrected by Helena.

Gabriel could be associated with the Stranger or Spiral? He has the engrammic matrix of two different people, and therefore the memories/personalities of two people. Which could be connected to the "your mind is lying to you" aspect of the Spiral, or the uncanny "something isn't right" aspect of the Stranger.

I could also connect the Desolation to what happened to Nosti. it's described as the fear of "pain, loss, burning, and destruction", and not only was the city itself destroyed, but also the lives that Raia and John (the Ark John) had created for themselves and those who lived there, as well as Raia's chance of having a life with John after he dies.

Raia does not work for or become an avatar of the Desolation. I considered going that route with the story, but in order for her to do that she would have to start causing that kind of destruction herself, and that does not seem like her character. She does cause destruction, but she specifically fights creatures that attack other survivors/villages, in order to make sure what happened to herself and Nosti doesn't happen to others. She would not help the 'god' that destroyed her city, and took the one she loved from her.

[damn-stark]

Chapter 16 The last supper

Chapter 16 of Sugar

A/N- Hakari and Kirara are in this chapter, they’re the best kids, the best.

Warning- Swearing, angst, FLUFF!! Talks of death, smoking and alcohol, spoilers, slow burn, long chapter.

Pairing- Choso x fem!reader, Suguru Geto x Gojo!fem-reader

Takes place during- 2x06, 2x07, and only the very beginning of 2x08

(Let me know if you want to be tagged)

————

The water droplets feel cold when they hit your skin, they’re hard and fall fast enough that they create a soft and pleasurable rhythmic song as they fall.

Normally there’s people who tend to run and find cover or hide under an umbrella as soon as the rain trickles down, but you’ve never minded the feeling of the rain; even if it can be cold, and you don’t like being cold, so. You don’t mind getting yourself soaked either even if it means drenching your clothes.

The sound of the rain relaxes you, the sound of waves crashing brings you comfort, and the view of the rain droplets dancing down from the sky has a way of bringing you ease. And that’s probably due to your connection with water.

However, today the sound of the water and the sight of the clear droplets doesn’t help the stupid ill-feeling brewing inside your guy. Maybe it’s the mission Itadori and his friends got sent to today to capture the mole; that same mole that helped the curses sneak into the school, and the same mole that is leaking information to curse users, but you can’t seem to find pleasure in the rain’s song or its view.

Something doesn’t feel right, but here’s hoping that you’re wrong. You want to be wrong.

“Hey…Geto,” the sound of Fushiguro’s voice catches you off guard, not because he called you by your…husband's name, but because ever since you met he doesn’t really make conversation with you like the others, he’s really quiet and reserved. Something that his father never was in that short interaction you had.

“Yes,” you give him your attention.

Fushiguro briefly meets your gaze before he looks at the parking garage where you’re supposed to meet Utahime. Hopefully, Satoru let her know you were coming or else you’re going to get a startled reaction, which honestly looks funny on Utahime, she’s so dramatic. It’s funny and adorable.

“That day we met,” he continues. “You said that I looked like him…were you referring to my father?”

Oh? No. No. Has Satoru not told him?! Please kid don’t ask about your father.

“I remember Gojo mentioned something like that when we met,” Fushiguro adds and finally lifts his head to meet your gaze.

You hold his gaze for a moment with confusion, but you can’t help but nod softly. “Yes, I was…why?”

Fushiguro shrugs and blinks to look at his friends ahead of you. “I was just curious…did you meet my father too?”

You nod stiffly and try to avoid anything too informative because this is Satoru’s kid, not yours. If he hasn’t told him then it’s for a good reason, you won’t be the one to break that.

“Once,” you tell Fushiguro. “Or twice, I guess. He came to see my brother once when we were children, and I guess I passed by him and I didn’t know. We met again years later, but that’s it.”

Please don’t ask. Please don’t ask.

Fushiguro hums and you try to read his face for his reaction to what you just shared, but he keeps on that nonchalant expression that’s always painted on his face and simply nods stiffly. You don’t dare and try to further this conversation, it’s not your place.

And luckily before he could try and ask or say anything else you reach the parking garage that connects to some storage units? Or some kind of storage things. And the first person your eyes land on is Utahime.

She looks older, her hair is longer and she has longer bangs. You also notice a scar across her face which makes her look badass. And just like you predicted her expression upon seeing you is different; whereas she’d be content seeing you before, now you receive a bitter and hardened gaze.

“Utahime,” you greet with the same warmth that you’d greet her with those many years ago. “Long time no see, you look nice.” You grin.

Utahime lets out a soft sigh and her shoulders tense. “I’d say it’s a pleasure,” she counters spitefully. “But it’s really not.”

You can’t help but shoot her a smirk and nod in comprehension. “Understandable.”

“Don’t patronize me,” she says through gritted teeth.

You laugh softly and when you reach her you simply pat her shoulder before you step aside to let them work. After all, you’re basically a shadow.

“This way,” Utahime moves on with the mission and leads you and the students about halfway down the garage before stopping and interjecting with a question. “You’ve heard from Gojo about the person leaking intel, right?”

“Yes,” all three students answer at the same time.

“There’s probably two or more people in contact with the curse users,” Utahime adds, “one would be a higher-up, well above the principal.”

You scoff with amusement under your breath, but Utahime hears you and shoots you a warning glare before continuing.

“I won’t be able to do anything about that one. The other would be someone passing the information up to the higher-up,” she explains as she lifts a finger from both hands. “That one is our current target. They’re only a suspect at this point, so we’ll capture them and then interrogate them.”

You fold your arms over your chest and lean back against a pillar, whilst Nobara speaks up with a question. “So who from Kyoto is it?”

“Oh?!” Itadori exclaims in surprise.

“That’s why you asked those of us from Tokyo, right?” Nobara adds and only seems to impress Itadori more.

“Kugisaki, you’re incredible.”

“The mole is…” Utahime pauses and as you drift your eyes over to her you see that she looks uncomfortable and displeased. “Mechamaru.”

One of her students you assume? A wrinkle forms between her eyebrows, and a small frown is formed on her lips.

You can’t imagine it was easy hearing that one of your own students that’s right under your nose is the mole. Then again a student being hidden away from the rest of the world is a perfect mole. They could’ve manipulated him, and even if they didn’t you wouldn’t blame him for taking the path he chose.

You do put all the blame on the higher-ups though. They like to act all high and mighty like they’re above it all, but they’re not, and what’s worse but not surprising is that they turn out to betray what they’re supposed to be protecting.

“And they say I’m the bad one,” you try to get in a conversation with Utahime, while she continues to lead the way towards a single door nearby. “A higher-up working for a curse-user…can’t say I’m surprised.”

“You are bad,” she quips. “You’re a cult leader and a curse-user.”

You shake your finger. “Ah, ah,” you quickly interject loudly so she can hear you. “Retired curse-user and it was not a cult. That word is so…” you pause and stick out your tongue in disgust. “…wrong. It was a religious facility. And! It was Suguru’s, I helped build it up, sure, so it was like, uh, 20 or 10 percent my baby, but I wasn’t the founder or the leader. He was.”

Utahime twists her head back and her displeasure and

anger for you only deepens, making the corner of your lips pull to a deeper smirk.

“Not like it matters now though,” you add quieter and with a hint of sadness in your tone. “It’s all done.”

Utahime answers with silence and stops by the door to open it and step inside. Itadori and Fushiguro let Nobara pass before them, and then they try to make you walk first, but you’re here for Itadori, you’re his shadow, not his partner right now, so after some passed and pointed glances both guys walk inside in a room, letting you walk in last and close the door behind you.

However, that turns out to be a mistake because the only source of light inside is an ominous red light over a single metal door. That’s all, no ceiling lights, no bright natural light casting in.

“Mechamaru’s real body, Kokichi Muta,” Utahime breaks the tension that you alone feel as this place gives you the creeps. “Is in this basement here. Now, it’s not like he’s suspicious. It’s more that everyone else wasn’t. So the process of elimination leaves with Mechamaru.”

When Utahime slowly opens the door, Itadori is the first to barge in as if nothing. You then all follow after him, which, by the way, this hall you walk into isn’t any better. It smells like mold, the light above is a dim and dull white-green color. And the further you walk in the worse it seems to get. At least to you anyway.

“Mechamaru’s technique is puppet manipulation,” Utahime continues to inform the students and you because this is all new to you too. “Though, thanks to his heavenly pact, the range he can manipulate puppets extends throughout Japan. If he has any unregistered puppets then he could do the work of the mole as much as he wanted.”

“Really?” You probe curiously even though you know you shouldn’t right now.

“That kid stood out a lot to me,” Itadori mutters.

“Even if the puppet was the size of a fly or a mosquito,” Utahime interjects.

“I see. But those are options too, huh?” Itadori asks while Utahime begins to slow down as you all approach a door.

“We’re here.” She points as she comes to a stop.

You draw in a deep breath and fist your hands as Utahime slowly turns the knob just in case this kid tries to tackle all of you with his puppets.

However, when she opens the door and everyone rushes inside you come to see an abandoned room. A smelly abandoned room.

“Uh,” Itadori rolls out awkwardly.

“He got us,” Utahaime mumbles out.

“Though,” Fushiguro breaks his silence. “On the other hand…”

“Now we’re certain it’s Mechamaru,” Nobara finishes saying for her friend.

No signs of struggle to indicate that he could be taken. All that’s left is tubing hanging off the ceiling, and a horrendous stench. It’s almost too calm, too quiet.

“Well,” you sigh and pull out a cigarette box to swiftly push one in between your lips. “Nothing to do with this but look over our shoulders.” You put your box away and light the cigarette with a flame you summon to your finger. “Something's brewing and we just lost our foot inside.”

You walk out of the room and everyone quickly follows.

“Don’t you have contacts?” Utahime finally addresses you. “Friends? It’s said that one of the curses might be someone dressed as a monk.”

You suck in your cheeks as you take a drag and shake your head. “No,” you breathe out as you pull the cigarette out of your mouth. “What? Just because Suguru dressed as a monk means I know them? It was an act to get the non-sorcerers curses, that's all. We didn’t actually know anyone who was a monk.”

Utahime picks up her pace to fall beside you, but as she walks in the cloud of smoke she tries to quickly wave it away.

“Can’t you just ask around?” She insists.

You look away to think while you take in another drag. Just as you’re about to take it out, Utahime reaches over and pulls the cigarette out of your mouth for you and stomps it out, making you pout softly.

“It’s not a habit,” you defend yourself as puffs of smoke escape out of your mouth. “I do it occasionally.”

“That doesn’t matter, can you?” She presses.

You let out a deep breath and nod stiffly. “I have friends. And if there’s a sketchy sorcerer then perhaps someone at the fighting club knows…” you mumble to yourself before you look at her and nod with an assuring smile playing on your lips “I’ll ask around for something, but what is it that I’m looking for exactly?”

Utahime shrugs. “All these curses, Mechamaru, and the higher-up work for someone, a curse-user who installs some kind of authority and fear. They’re up to something so they probably need any help they can get. Start there.”

You scoff and nod slowly. “All right. I’ll ask.”

She nods softly. “Thanks,” she mutters.

You steal a glance at her and hum. An idea comes to mind but you quickly shoot that down since what you have planned is for people you’re closer with, family and closer friends.

She was a friend, but you can sense the tension, and you see the way she looks at you, you’re no friend of hers. Not anymore.

Thus, you just leave it be and stay quiet. You bask in that silence and just think about the mess that’s spreading as you return to the school with your hands empty.

If only Suguru was here to help. To at least calm down your nerves even if everything isn’t okay. Why can’t he be here too? Why did he have to die and why do you have to face all this alone now?

You exhale and before you know it Ijichi parks the car to let you and the students off at the school entrance. Before you can get out though, you lean over towards him.

“Hey, I’m having dinner at my house tomorrow since the kids want to go see the community, come,” you invite him too. “I invited Nanami and my brother, of course, Ieiri will be there.” You wiggle your eyebrows playfully. “So come, yeah? Make sure my brother gets there in time.” You laugh softly.

Ijichi blinks in surprise and his cheeks begin to grow red. “M-me?” He questions.

You nod. “Yes, you. Why not? We were good friends once when I was in school. So you better come!” You pull back and slide off your seat to get out of the car. “Be there!” You shout over your shoulder one last time before you look over at the school entrance and see the woman you hoped you’d see.

“It better be something good,” she throws out as you change your pace to a jog to meet her with an embrace.

“Well, I’ll tell you now,” you tell her and step back. “It’s not a bar. I do have to go home for dinner.”

“You smell like cigarettes,” she points out and follows after you as you lead her to your motorcycle.

“Stress cigarette,” you mumble. “And I’m sorry about the ride. I didn’t plan to have passengers.”

“Ah, just something else that makes you look cooler;” she teases.

You flash her a smile. “It was part of my training. Yuki and I built a motorcycle.”

“Exactly how does that help?” Shoko probes as you hand her an extra helmet.

You stop what you’re doing to tap your chin as you think. “I don’t remember why exactly, but I remember it working.” You drop your hand and wink at Shoko. “Don’t worry, baby, I’m an excellent driver.”

Shoko looks at you with hesitance as she debates whether to believe you or not. But then again she has no other choice so she sits behind you and lets you take her to a place you only vaguely explained.

——

*LATER*

“Where are we anyways?” Shoko finally gets the chance to ask.

You put the helmets away and lead her to a multiple-story building. “Fight Club,” you finally let her know.

Albeit she doesn’t believe you so she scoffs and retorts. “I’m serious.”

You peer back and nod. “So am I. This is a fight club.”

You walk up to the door and knock once before the slit on the door opens and grey eyes peek out. They don’t say anything when they see you, they just look back and then close the slit again before they open the door for you.

“Come on,” you invite her in. “It’s early so it’s quiet right now.”

Shoko looks at you with a puzzled look, but she doesn’t hesitate to trust you and follow you at your side. After you ride the elevator to the top of the building she finally continues on with the questions you felt her wanting to ask.

“So this is what you do now that you don’t run a cult?” She asks as she studies the hallway. “Fight clubs?”

You scoff. “The word cult is so wrong. It was a religious facility. And second,” you motion with your fingers. “This isn’t really my fight club, I just, uh, financially support it. Think of me as a godmother of this place,” you say with a cocky half-smile.

Shoko hums and continues inquiring. “Then who owns this place?”

You reach the private parlor room and simply shoot her a smirk before you knock on the door just in case. You don’t want to walk into some nasty stuff.

“Come in!” You hear a happy familiar voice welcome you in.

You smile and open the door, and the moment you walk in you’re greeted with a warm and happy welcome. “Master!”

You beam. “Hello my star children,” you greet Kirara and Hakari.

Rather than coming to greet you by the door, they stay seated on the couch as they watch Shoko walk in.

“Don’t worry we can trust her,” you assure them while you close the door behind your friend.

“Kirara? Hakari?” Shoko asks quietly in disbelief.

You walk further in and nod with glee. “Yeah. Didn’t my brother tell you? I’ve been training them for the past year. They’re the owners of this club.”

“Secret club,” Kirara blurts. “So don’t be going around and talking to anyone at the school about it.”

You sit on the expensive chair behind the expensive dark wooden desk and sit back smugly. “I just wanted to show off to someone our work here,” you add. “All the investors that invested in Suguru’s facilities now invest here in exchange for us to do their dirty work of course.”

“So,” Shoko rolls out and slowly makes her way to the seat across from the pair. “You’ve brought students in to do your dirty work now? You sound like your brother.”

You chuckle dryly and shake your head. “It’s nothing they don’t want to do. We all work for something, Ieiri, it’s how the world works. They wanted something so I gave it to them, but they know that in order to keep it and be on top, they have to work for it. Besides, staying at home would bore me half to death. I need to stay busy while I’m still young.”

Shoko hums and watches you for something in particular, when she can’t find it due to the wall you put up she just stays quiet.

“Now do you want something to drink? Water, snack? You get it for free.” You laugh breathlessly.

Shoko shakes her head. “No. Now why am I here exactly?”

“I told you,” you say and lean in towards the desk to pick up a file. “I wanted to show this off and I wanted you to get out of the school for a while. God knows you work too much for them. But I will have to ask you not to go on and talk about this. This club is a secret underground kinda thing.”

“You’re not looking for a job now are you doc?” Hakari breaks his silence. “We could use a good doctor here. And you’re great.”

“We’d pay you double,” Kirara pitches in.

Shoko laughs and shrugs before sitting back. “I’ll think about it.”

“Now,” you change the subject and open the file to take out one photo of a blond ponytail guy. “Is this it?”

Hakari gets off the couch and walks to your side and nods. “Yep. No one else has stood out, just that scrawny pathetic-looking thing.”

You pick up the photo and study the skinny guy with a black cloth that covers half of his body. You also notice that he has three marks under his eyes, but that’s all that stands out. He’s pretty average-looking.

But you can’t be fooled by that.

“He simply wrote Haruta at the entrance and that’s it. He didn’t fight either, the cameras just picked on him watching the fights.”

You let out a deep breath and sit back to think.

“Probably scooping place,” Shoko interjects.

“Did security detect any extra cameras or any other stuff he carried?” You ask.

Hakari shakes his head. “Asked and he said no. He only came that one night too. Hasn’t returned since.”

“Alone?”

“Yep. Or so that’s what he made us believe.”

You look up at the ceiling and try to figure something out even though this piece of information is practically nothing.

“No one suspicious has come to visit either,” Kirara adds. “But remind me again why you’re working to look for this mole, master?” They ask with concern. “You’re practically working for the school and the higher-ups if you help them.”

“The mole thing is leading to something bigger,” you explain. “Something bigger means danger to all of us, not just the school. We’ve worked hard for what we've built, this potential threat can endanger that. So it’s not for them, it’s for me, you, Harkari, my community, and my girls. That’s what.”

“Besides she doesn’t work for anyone,” Hakari says in your defense, making you smile and look over at him. “So this labor is just a hobby.”

You chuckle and put your fist out so he can meet it halfway with a fist pump. “Nicely put.” You compliment.

“Suck up,” Kirara coughs out.

“Aw I get it now,” Shoko adds with a sly laugh. “You’re a mobster. My own little mobster.”

You pick up the landline phone and shoot her a smirk. “Got to keep the money coming somehow. Plus this is a way to keep tabs on sorcerers around Japan. You’d be surprised how many sorcerers I have tabs on. I work to piss my family off. And this,” you point at the desk to refer to all your work. “Would make them livid.” You roll your head down and begin to call up a number.

“Now what would your high school self say about you now?” Shoko teases.

“She’d be surprised but proud.” You say and throw a hand out to display your excitement as the phone rings.

“Hello?” The voice that belongs to an old business partner answers.

“Kong,” you greet sweetly. “Long time, yeah?”

You hear him draw in a deep breath before he scoffs shakily. “Y/N.”

You tilt your head down and rest your elbow on the desk to lay your head on your palm. “Now I hope I didn’t interrupt anything. You’re a very hard man to find. I hope you weren’t avoiding me. You know what happens when someone does.” You taunt.

“Why would I?” He mutters. “We’re old friends, so I know you want something?”

“Oh,” you breathe out. “Looking for work,” you lie. “Without Suguru here I’m growing bored, I need to find work to do. Do you happen to know anyone in need of any sorcerers for hire?”

Kong doesn’t answer for a few seconds, letting you pick up your head and turn on the computer to check his last location a friend gave you. “You’ve gone quiet, what is it? I wouldn't want to go to the States to ask in person.”

“I—”

“Don’t,” you cut him off abruptly and in an intimidating voice. “I know where you are, Kong. You’ve been avoiding me since Suguru died. So I know you’re hiding something, spill it or I’ll tell my friend in the red cap next to you to make this the last call you ever take.”

Kong shares a nervous laugh that makes the frown on your face deepen. “We’ve been friends for a decade, y/n,” he stammers. “I went to your wedding—”

“And I don’t care,” you interrupt and begin to tap your manicured nail against the wooden surface. “You stopped being my friend the moment you stopped talking to me, even then you meant nothing to me. I won’t blink an eye to give the command. Spill it or I’ll lose my patience.”

Kong exhales deeply before he answers a bit quieter. “My life is at stake here okay? But I’ll tell you this because you are my friend because I care. Manami and Toshihisa are hiding something. Unfortunately for them, they haven’t let go of the goal Geto put in their head.” He sighs. “This should be enough right?”

You clench your jaw and grow cold and stiff. “Yeah,” you deadpan and hang up.

“What is it, master?” Kirara asks right away since the confused and suddenly hurt look on your face is obviously clear.

“Maybe nothing,” you answer honestly. “Or maybe something important. I think Manami and Toshihisa are betraying me.”

The room falls silent and your mind begins to run rampid.

Yeah, you’ve always known that the two that were just named have been a bit more motivated about what Suguru preached. And after he died they wanted to continue with his work, but you didn’t exactly egg them on. You had no purpose for the religious facilities since you couldn’t store curses like Suguru, and you just hurt too much to try and continue his goal at such a big scale, so you just gave up his dream.

It seems like they didn’t though. And it shouldn't be surprising, not really, but they were still family. For a long time, they were all you had, so that’s why this feels like getting shot in the back. You’re supposed to be close, you’re supposed to share stuff like that with each other, so why didn’t they? What are they hiding?

“So what does that mean for our problem?” Shoko queries.

You continue to tap your nail against the surface and shrug. “I don’t know. I doubt they’ll talk to me…they’ve been distant…I should’ve known, damn it.”

“There’s no way you could’ve known,” Kirara tries to assure you. “You had faith in them.”

“Who’s the suck-up now?” Hakari rebuttals softly. “But in any way, master, Kira is right. There’s no way you could’ve known so don’t beat yourself up over it. Let’s look for them and beat the information out of ‘em.”

You laugh softly and nod stiffly. “Yeah, you’re right, Kin, no need for more stress. I'll just accept it as it is, a betrayal...” You sigh loudly and sit back lazily. “What a pain in my ass! I should’ve never taken this favor for Satoru.”

“Now look at you,” Shoko retorts. “Now you’ve got your head stuck in that hole. With no way out.”

You fold your arms over your chest and mumble. “I should…I should get my head out. Give me a good reason why I should stay, Ieiri?”

Said woman sighs and you hear the leather seat she’s on shift as she moves in her seat. “Your kids' lives could be on the line,” she puts it simply, making you lower your head and steal a glance at Kirara and Hakari before you look at your hands and think of your girls.

She’s right. Whatever’s going on isn’t just a drizzle with the sun poking out, it’s a brewing storm with no sun, just darkness.

“And,” Shoko adds. “You won’t leave Satoru to deal with it on his own, no matter how much he fights for you to stay behind.”

That’s also right. She’s right.

“Yeah, I guess you’re right,” you mumble.

“Always am.”

You manage a faint smile and have to just drop your head in your hands to take in what was dropped on you; another weight to your already heavy and tensionful chest. You’re not drowning anymore, Hakari and Kirara saved you from that, but this weight? Oh, that weight.

You can’t breathe again. It’s getting hard again.

“If that’s what you want,” Hakari says. “Then there’s nothing you can do about it at this moment.”

You hear feet hit the ground before someone comes over. As you lift your head you see Kirara finally joined Hakari and you by the desk.

“What?” You probe as you notice that they’re up to something.

“Just doing our thing,” they simply put it out before they lean over and get on the computer to put on music.

“Ah,” you laugh breathlessly and can’t help but tug a happy smile on your face. “I see.”

“What’s going on?” Shoko asks as she sees all of you smile.

“She smokes when she’s stressed,” Kirara explains. “We’ve found an alternative. We dance it out. When he can of course.”

Yet no matter how much you danced it out at that moment, no matter how much fun you did have. At night after you put Satori to sleep, after the twins began to get ready for bed, all that you ran away from comes back and you’re reminded of that heavy weight, and you can’t help but think of the man that can’t come and comfort you, the man you can’t hold.

All that stress transforms to longing and you feel lonelier as you’re embraced by the cold fall bitter air under the starry sky. You try to find comfort in his stupid gojogesa you always hated seeing on him, but it no longer smells like him, it’s not warm after his use, it’s cold and holds nothing but agony.

You try to maybe find comfort in one of your many favorite pictures you have with him to try to relive that moment in your head and see him at least as a distant memory, but you can’t bring yourself to feel an ounce of happiness at the sight of the engraved memory on the piece of glossy paper. And when you play that day of him trying to make baby Satori look at the camera in your head, all you see is a faded day, and all you feel is longing for a moment you can’t share with him anymore.

So you put the picture down and press your hand on the empty spot next to you on the dock, and close your eyes to try and picture him here with you in such a vivid way that perhaps you’ll be able to feel some ounce of his presence. But again only the cold air keeps you company, and the only warmth you feel is that of your tears running down your cheeks.

Nevertheless, you still open your eyes and expect him to be looking right back at you with that sweet and charming smile of his, but he’s not here. Not even the ghost of him.

Albeit there are a pair of eyes watching you. Two to be exact, but you don’t catch them since they keep themselves away from your eyesight, so you don’t catch them watching you cry for the man they saw you love with your whole heart. They just watch you with pity and sympathy, and a bit of guilt since they can’t do anything to get him back for their little sister, for them, or for you so you wouldn’t be so lonely anymore.

——

*THE NEXT DAY*

“Welcome, friends, family.” You greet the guests that are coming here for the first time, and the guests who are already familiar with this place. “Some of you have already set foot in our fine establishment, but those who haven’t, welcome to the community…”

The name is still a work in progress, so for now, that’s what it’s going to be called.

“…Our community for sorcerers.”

“Boo get on with it,” Satoru pretends to haggle.

You look at him surprised. “You’re here early,” you respond kindly. “Did Ijichi really drag you out?”

“N-no—”

“No,” Satoru cuts Ijichi off. “Nanami came over and basically did.”

You offer your friend a thankful smile and then point inside before you begin to lead Shoko, Ijichi, and the first-year students to your house through the community. “As I said, we try to be as self-sufficient as possible. We grow our crops, we have a greenhouse; cows, goats, chickens, and horses.”

“You eat horses?” Itadori dares to ask almost a bit horrified.

You look back and shoot him an offended look before you shake your head rapidly. “No! Horses are great therapy, we use them to help sorcerers who struggle. And taking care of them is fun, they’re beautiful creatures, so no we don’t eat them!”

Satoru walks over to Itadori and throws his arm around his shoulders before leaning close to him to add a comment with a mischievous smirk. “My sister here is like a hippie, she’s into meditation, and a connection with the earth. She’s a weirdo. Don’t mind her.”

You glare at him and huff.

“Actually,” Fushiguro cuts in nonchalantly. “Meditation is proven good for your mental health, and in our case, it’s good to improve our mental strength for our techniques. So I wouldn't say it’s weird.”

You spin around and face your brother with a taunting grin. Whilst he lets go of Itadori and looks at Fushiguro amused.

“You sound like my sister,” Satoru teases his student—or protege, or adopted son? From what your brother mentioned he’s been looking out for Fushiguro ever since Toji died; Toji who happens to be his father. So they’ve been in each other's lives for eleven years now. So yeah he’s probably like a son or a little brother.

“That’s actually right,” you defend Fushiguro and then turn back around. “Anyway, we don’t eat horses, and there’s not a lot of people living here, but we are a scarce few, but,” you clap your hands. “Those who do live here are from all around the world. For the most part. Right now,” you say and look around at the semi-empty streets. There’s only a couple of people roaming around, but for the most part, everyone seems to be in their homes. “It seems it’s down time, earlier in the day though, it’s very lively.”

“Satoru!” You hear someone yell.

“Hey, Satoru!”

You glance over your shoulder and see women waving and flirting with your brother from afar. And of course, he doesn’t leave them hanging.

“Hey, ladies!” He flashes them a flirty smile and waves back. “So good to see ya!”

You groan in disgust and just move along. “We have a school for the younger kids, a daycare, and a training facility here too,” you continue to share happily.

“Can I ask what people do for money? And rent?” Nobara asks.

You nod. “Some people go to work outside, but I don’t make anyone pay for their housing, people have chores. But no rent,” you laugh softly. “And utilities are covered by me, but we do have solar panels, alternatives. We just—”

“Have you ever heard of communism?” Satoru butts in. “Well, this is it. My sister is a model, sorcerer, and a communist. Hefty resume.” He grins and turns his head to face you.

“Well,” Shoko interjects and lets out a deep breath. “I'm tempted to come here to retire now. This sounds like a treat. And looks nicer than I expected considering it’s all in the middle of the woods.”

You offer her a smile and steal one glance at the students observing the place with curious and slightly awe-struck faces.

“Dinner is ready, but the twins will give you a more thorough tour of the place after. That way you’re not stuck with us oldies for so long.” You giggle and grab Shoko’s arm to drag her along with you. “Come on, come on, I want you to meet her already.”

The tour is short since you didn’t take them to any of the barns, or any other minor location in your community, but you just can’t help it. You want Shoko to meet Satori already, plus it’s getting late so everyone must be getting hungry. You know you are.

And once you approach your house, the door gets thrown open and your daughter comes running out to greet one person. “Uncle Satoru!”

Satoru walks past Nanami, Shoko, and you to meet Satori halfway with an embrace he had to give her while on his knees so he can be at her level.

“Satori!” Satoru greets with the same energy.

“I missed you,” Satori says and pulls back to face him. “I haven’t seen you since…forever ago. Like, last month.” She exaggerates.

Satoru snickers. “Sorry I’ve been busy, but,” he adds and pulls his hand away to pretend and grab something from her ear. She giggles and watches him as he swiftly maneuvers his gift between his fingers before he presents her with a little golden key. “This is for you.”

Satori looks at the key slightly confused, and then glances at you to seek help for what she’s seeing.

“A key?” She asks and takes the small golden key from his hand. “What for?”

Satoru pulls his shades off and winks at her. “You’ll see.” He then leans in and whispers something in her ear before pointing at Shoko.

Satori follows his finger and when she sees the stranger before her she shuffles closer to Satoru. After all, out of everyone here, she’s the only one she hasn’t met. She met the students and Ijichi after Satoru insisted that he wanted to take her to meet his students, so they’re not strangers to her, she actually really likes Fushiguro for some odd reason. But Shoko? They’ve never met until now.

“Geez,” Shoko muses. “I guess there’s no need for a DNA test, she looks just like him.”

You blink and slowly look at her with a pointed look. “Why would you say that?” You mutter.

Shoko shrugs. “I don’t know, I’m seeing her in person now and all I see is a girl version of Suguru.”

You hum in agreement since she is right, but why did she have to say it like that?

“You sure she’s yours?” Shoko jokes, making you shake your head.

“Hello,” your daughter's voice cuts in. And when you look down you see her with an arm draped around her uncle, and her cheek pressed against his.

“Shoko, this is Satori—”

“Satoru,” you try to cut in so the girl can introduce herself.

“Satori, this mine and your mom's oldest friend, Ieiri Shoko!” He completely ignores you.

“Hello,” Shoko greets your daughter kindly and crouches down so Satori can see her warm smile. “You look just like your dad, you know that?”

“You were my daddy’s friend too?” Satori queries as she stays next to your brother.

Shoko nods. “Yeah, he was my best friend.”

Satori smiles. “My uncle Satoru said that. You’re very pretty,” she says

Shoko grins and touches her chest. “Aw thank you. So are you.”

Satori blushes and grabs harder onto Satoru as she grows timid.

“This is for you,” Shoko shares and offers her a small pink gift bag.

Before your daughter can take it though she meets your gaze for reassurance.

You quickly give it to her, and she slowly steps away from Satoru to take the bag, letting Shoko stand up to her given height.

“Thank you,” Satori tells her before she puts the bag down to open it and pulls out a box that she strains to take out. “It’s heavy,” she mumbles and turns to you. “Mommy, can you help me?”

You walk over and crouch to hold the box for her so she can open it. She then puts her hands inside and sticks her tongue out as she slowly pulls out a small, beautiful black and golden orb music box that’s adorned with delicate designs, and small white paintings on the lid. Of course, though, Satori can’t identify what it is right away.

“What is it?” She asks with an amused smile tugging her lips.

“You have to use your key,” Satoru lets her know, making her glance at the golden key in her hand before she does as she’s told and carefully turns it a couple of times. When the key stops, Satori pulls her hand back and glances at you with slight confusion. However, before she can ask what follows, the lid opens and a sweet melody begins to play, causing the fairy in the middle to begin dancing along gently.

Satori’s eyes soften and a big and happy smile grows on her face. “Aww, look Mommy! Look!”

You nod softly. “I’m looking, now what do you tell the sweet lady.” You say and flash Shoko a teasing smile.

Satori snaps her head over towards Shoko and her eyes basically gleam with how excited she is. “Thank you!”

Shoko offers her a smile and a soft nod. “Yeah, you're welcome.”

Satori offers Shoko one more smile before she takes her box and walks over to Nanami.

“Look, maybe we can play a song for my daddy,” she tells him and grabs his hand to begin pulling him inside with her. “You like it, uncle Nanami?”

Said man smiles softly and nods. “Yeah, it’s very nice. Do you love it?”

“Yes! Do you think my daddy will like hearing it?” She asks.

“I think so,” Nanami agrees and goes along with Satori. “I think he’ll love it just as much as you do.”

Finally, without more interruptions, you continue to finish this tour inside. “Come on, let’s get in, dinners ready!”

“Hey, yeah I’m starving!” Itadori exclaims and skips forward to be ahead of the group, letting Satori glance at him as she continues walking at Nanami’s side.

“Hey, Itadori,” she addresses him with a very serious and curious look. “If you’re so strong how come you don’t have any muscles?”

Your eyes widen in disbelief even though you’re fighting the need to burst out laughing.

Nobara on the other hand chuckles and hits Itadori’s back. “Nice one Satori!” She tells your little girl.

“I do too,” Itadori argues. “They’re under my jacket.”

Satori's eyebrows furrow and she looks unconvinced. “Hm.”

Itadori gasps and then hits Fushiguro's chest. “He doesn’t have any either. How come you don’t tell him that, huh?”

“She’s 6 years old, Itadori,” Fushiguro mutters in annoyance. “Leave it be.”

“Well…” Satori pauses and glances back at Satoru, and then at Nanami next to her, and doesn’t bother bringing Fushiguro into this. “My Uncle Satoru and Nanami have muscles. So does my uncle Miguel and my uncle Larue. How come you don’t?”

“I’ll show you—”

“He’s just younger…” Nanami interjects to inform your daughter, but you lose track of what they’re saying as they walk inside the house first.

When you get inside you all take your shoes off, and you then rush over to the living room and thankfully find your other daughters lounging on the couch without as much excitement as Satori possessed over this dinner.

They only decided to join because you mentioned that Nanami and other people besides your brother would be here, otherwise, they probably would’ve left or stayed in their room if it was just you and your brother.

“Get up, just an introduction and we’ll go eat,” you try to move them off the couch.

Mimiko is the first to get up, while Nanako groans and has her sister help her off the couch.

“Nice bunny,” you remind her as you caress her head before you push them along with you towards the kitchen where everyone is heading.

“Everyone!” You cut in, making them stop one more time. “Just some last introductions. This,” you point at Mimiko by grabbing her shoulder. “Is Mimiko.”

Said girl takes everyone in and then offers everyone a gentle bow. “Hello,” she greets and stands up to hold her stuffed creature tighter against her before you notice her eyes fall on one teenage boy in particular; the nonchalant, urchin head, Megumi Fushiguro.

He seems to meet her gaze and hold it for a moment before you cut it by introducing someone else. “And this is Nanako.”

This greeting is a bit more stiff and cool compared to Mimiko’s warm and timid one. “Hey.”

You laugh dryly and introduce the others quickly. “Girls you know Ijichi.”

Nanako giggles and nods.

“Hello girls,” Ijichi greets them stiffly. “Nice seeing you again.”

Nanako simply smirks, letting you move on. “These are my brother's students, Megumi Fushiguro, Yuji Itadori, and Nobara Kugisaki. And Lastly,” you roll out more upbeat as you move over to take your friend's arm. “This is Doctor Ieiri Shoko, the girl I told you about. My best friend!”

“Nice to meet you girls,” Shoko greets them warmly before Nobara steps forward and points at them with a slightly surprised look on her face.

“Is that Chanel, the 1995 spring collection?”

Nanako and Mimiko share a quick look before Mimiko nods.

Nobara gasps and her jaw drops. “Where did you get it?!”

“Y/n’s closet,” Nanako shows off. “She has a lot of cool clothes.”

You groan softly in protest but they just ignore you and continue to interact, making you smile proudly nonetheless and watch them for a lingering moment before you walk to the dining room with Shoko, your brother, Ijichi, and the boys.

“We’re back,” Satori announces without her box and with Nanami following behind her. “I let Daddy hear the box while I eat.”

“That’s very nice my girl,” you tell her sweetly as you walk to the end of the food-filled table that makes Itadori’s eyes basically pop out of his sockets.

“This all looks so good!” He exclaims and rushes over to get a seat as if they would run out.

“My mommy and Belinda made it,” Satori announces as she takes a seat next to Satoru.

“Oh if that's the case,” Satoru jokes around. “Get your fake smiles and a napkin ready.”

“But mommy is a good cook,” Satori defends you, making Satoru lean towards her to whisper something that makes her giggle before she looks at you and changes her response. “I mean she’s not!” She giggles along with her uncle.

“I’d appreciate it if you didn’t joke around like that with her,” you try to advise him sweetly.

“Relax, she knows it’s just a joke.” He waves you off.

You sigh and just ignore it for now and wait for everyone to gather around the table.

“Oh, yeah where’s Hakari and Kirara?” Shoko queries as she grabs a bowl of food to serve herself.

“Busy,” you tell her. “They couldn’t make it.”

You look around the table and watch everyone settle down with a growing smile. Your brother sits across from you, and the twins choose to sit beside you so as to avoid being near your brother, Nobara sits beside them and they seem to carry on their current conversation, while Fushiguro tries to pull Itadori from overfilling his plate. Nanami sits next to Satori, and Shoko sits at your other side, making Ijichi sit next to her and make himself small as if to avoid bothering her.

You watch everyone fill their plate and talk amongst themselves with admiration that turns to longing for only one man. He would’ve loved to see this moment here, he would’ve been enchanted having his friends and his family dining together like a close united front. This would’ve been a glimpse of that life he dreamed of, or maybe it would’ve been enough, but he would’ve loved all this.

But he’s not here, and all you can do is be happy for him.

“I just wanted to thank everyone for being here,” you cut in as everyone begins to eat. “It really means a lot. It’s been a long time since we’ve been gathered like this, and I know there’s a couple of people missing, but we’ll carry them with us today, and welcome the new faces that accompany us.” You smile at all the kids. “Thank you.”

“Cheers!” Itadori muffles as he chews his food, making Fushiguro and Nanami look at him with disgust.

“Exactly,” you counter sweetly. “Actually feel free to serve yourselves wine made with organic grapes from Italy. It’s homemade by Miguel, a member of our family. And don’t worry it’s light on the alcohol, so Itadori, Nobara, and Fushiguro, you can have some. And don’t worry,” you snicker. “I’ve made a non-alcoholic one for you Satoru, you and Satori can share.”

Satoru clenches his jaw and folds his hands over the table as Shoko and you laugh at him.

“Who would’ve thought,” you add smugly. “That the strongest sorcerer can’t handle his liquor.” You chuckle. “So if you kids ever want to defeat him just give him a cup of alcohol and he’ll go down. Like that one time on Shoko’s birthday, do you remember when he…” you pause and laugh hysterically along with Shoko to the point you can’t finish your story as you recall that day.

“He fell—“ Shoko snorts, and you wheeze.

“Poor Haibara man,” you gasp for air.

“Hilarious,” Satoru deadpans. “I hope you both choke on your food.”

“It was pretty funny,” Nanami joins in too with a tiny smile before he takes a bite of his food.

You slap your chair and wipe away your tears.

“So are you going to tell us, or?” Nobara asks.

Shoko and you look at each other again and burst out laughing. And you in fact don’t end up telling the story, you just can’t muster up the strength to do it without laughing. It was just too much of a funny night, so it goes untold and the night carries on great. No better than that, it’s perfect in your opinion. You have fun. You smile and go on not thinking about Suguru for a while.

Games are played, and more stories are told, the older kids go out and get shown around the property by the twins, while Satori has no other choice but to be with you. Not like she minded though, she enjoyed Nanami and Satoru’s company.

The night transcends almost like old times, you acknowledge the big hole left by a couple of people, but you feel that same bliss. So simple and so warm. And it doesn’t get knocked down by the loss you still mourn deeply every day. Eventually, you end up catching the twins and the other three hanging around a bonfire they built by the lake, and rather than feeling sad as you recall the fact that it reminds you of your youth and that he can’t see this moment, you smile to yourself and admire from the older kids afar with a drink in your hand.

This, this moment is what you've worked so hard for. Watching Nanako, Nobara, and Itadori laughing about something they said, noticing Fushiguro and Mimiko smile timidly at each other as they seem to discuss over a book in her hand without a worry, is what you dreamed of. Of course, this is a fraction of it, but it’s the next generation of sorcerers living a simple moment that you longed to see.

They deserve to live it for as long as they live.

“What’s going over here?” Satoru breaks your silence.

You blink and watch him take the empty next to you on the patio swing. “I was just watching the kids,” you point out and shift your body to face him. “Admiring them. And hoping their lives are just filled with moments like the ones they’re living now.”

Satoru drifts his eyes to watch them now too and a soft smile tugs on his face. “They will. That’s what we’re fighting for aren’t we?”

You hum in agreement and continue to watch him as a question forms in your head unrelated to what you just spoke about. It’s an old question really, one that always lingers in your head. And you don’t know why you have the burning desire to ask it now out of all days; maybe it’s the quiet moment, maybe it’s the alcohol in your system, but it comes to your lips, it forms tears in your eyes and makes your heart race before you start it.

“Why?” You ask quietly.

Satoru hums and lifts his head to slowly turn and face you with a questioning look. When he sees the tears welling in your pleading eyes it’s not hard to know what this is leading to.

“Why did you leave that day?” You plead for an answer again. “Why did you break my heart that day?”

Satoru blinks repeatedly and glances down as he brushes his fingers through his hair.

“And don’t avoid it,” you press sharply and breathlessly as if you had been out of breath. “Don’t rebuttal with a question, tell me. You owe me that at least because I don’t think I can go on pretending I’m okay with it. I can’t live like this anymore, so please, Satoru tell me why you left me behind in that damn house with those horrible people we call our family.”

Satoru smacks his lips as he draws in a deep breath, and nervously licks his lips as he slowly breathes out through his nose. “I…thought I was making the right choice.”

You scoff. “The right choice? The right choice was trusting me,” you argue. “I don’t know if I would’ve left with Suguru if I did leave with you, there’s no way of knowing, but you had to trust me. And you didn’t, you betrayed me in the worst way possible and it hurt…” you inhale sharply and grab your chest to let out that shaky breath.

“I just didn’t want you to leave too,” Satoru finally shares, making your breath hitch. “He had left, I thought I could prevent you from leaving if you stayed there. I didn’t think they’d try and make you do anything, you know?” He says and his gaze never flickers away from yours. “So I left. And I knew you’d be angry by it, but I was convinced I could make it up when I took you back to the school. I just didn’t want you to leave…” he trails off and swallows back thickly before he exhales deeply.

You look at him with your eyes glossy and with a soft look of disbelief and full of pain.

“I’m sorry,” he says and makes you freeze and look at him blankly as you progress words you didn’t think he’d say, at least you thought you’d need to drag it out of him.

“I’m sorry that I ended up hurting you,” he whispers in a soft voice you rarely hear now. It’s so genuine and vulnerable.

But it’s not enough. Five days were a few, but those five days were torture and they happened because he left you that day.

“It’s not that easy,” you mutter as the shock passes and contentment laced with deep cemented pain takes its place. “But…I want to try and forgive you. I…miss you. I hate feeling this tension between us. I hate not talking like we used to when you come over. But it’s not easy forgiving you because I really looked up to you…”

Satoru huffs softly and his eyes fall.

“I really thought you’d never hurt me and you did,” you whisper. “I can’t forget that, but I want to try. I do.”

Satoru inhales sharply and meets your gaze with a softened look and nods softly. “Yeah that’s a start,” he says.

You laugh softly and nod in agreement. Silence follows after that, but it’s not awkward, it’s not full of tension you can cut through with a knife, and there’s genuine contentment and relief over this new beginning.

However, that slowly crumbles as you feel that longing and that gap left behind by a man you both cherished and cared for.

“I really miss him,” you break the silence in hopes he feels the same.

Satoru draws out a deep breath and nods. “I know,” he mutters and notices you holding back your tears as you stare at the ground so he slowly, and carefully puts his hand on your back to very gently caress it.

He didn’t need to say anything else, you heard the softness of his voice, and you detected the grief you feel every day. And this time the silence that descends over you lingers for a while, up to the moment he grows cold.

“It’s cold out here,” he tells you and gets out of the chair. “Why don’t we head inside?”

You look up at him and nod, but you don’t move. “I’ll be there soon. I just need to collect myself a bit.”

Satoru hesitates but he doesn’t fight you to leave. This is your home after all. “All right. Just don’t freeze to death out here because I will gloat.”

You let out a soft laugh and watch him walk inside before you take a chug of the alcohol you still have and then let your body slide to the side as you rest your elbow on the armrest, and lay your head on your hand as you stare off blankly while you think about him.

It doesn’t seem like you were there for so long, you didn’t feel time pass, but apparently it did because suddenly Nanami comes out to join you.

“Y/N, you’ve been out here for a while, why don’t you come inside? Get to bed and sleep it off, yeah?”

You sigh and shake your head. “No…n-no, I just need to collect myself. I don’t want her to see me like this,” you mutter and put the bottle down before you sit up to swing your legs back and forth. “Just a…bib more,” you slur your words.

Nanami sighs and slowly takes a step closer. “Satori asked Satoru to put her to bed, and the twins took the students to their room, so come on,” he says and closes the space left between the two of you by gently grabbing your arm and picking you off the porch swing.

You swallow thickly and try to argue, but you actually don’t have the strength so you just muster something else that slips out of your mouth. “I’m sorry…I’m a terrible host. Suguru…he was better at it…I’m sorry.”

Nanami pulls you inside to the warmth that fills the house, and you sigh as you finally feel embraced by the warmth.

“You did pretty well,” Nanami tells you. “Up until you didn’t come back inside.”

You roll your eyes and nudge him gently. “Oh, come on you're being too nice. What happened to you? You used to be mean.”

Nanami scoffs softly. “I was going through a phase,” he rebuttals. “And I didn’t say you were good, I said you did well.”

You laugh softly and then hiccup, making your friend look at you with worry.

“How much did you have to drink?” Nanami asks, considering you tend to be erratic when you’re drunk like you are now.

You shrug and pinch your fingers together. “A little”

At least you were erratic, Suguru’s death changed you; you’re a lot quieter now too, more serious than he was used to from you. Perhaps if it wasn’t for Satoru asking you to train Hakari and Kirara, you would have locked yourself away in your community only tending to your people and daughters.

Yet even if you had a reason to pull yourself up, Nanami could still see all that pain you like to hide. He can see it now so clearly in your glossy orange-red eyes, he can see it through your silence as he helps you to your room.

“I’ll bring you some water, and a bucket,” Nanami whispers softly. “Just in case.”

You lift your blankets and crawl into your bed. “Okay,” you mutter and think about the fact that you’re in your clothes, but your mind doesn’t actually give the command to change, you just lay and think about it while Nanami disappears.

That is until it’s like you forgot that Suguru has been gone for almost a year and turn to your side in search of Suguru. You expect to see him sleeping on his back, with his long hair draped over his shoulders while some other strands are spread about his pillow wildly. You expect to see him with his head tilted to the side, causing drool to dribble down the corner of his mouth. Alas, the moment your eyes fall on an empty spot next to you your heart shatters and you’re slammed with the urgent need to cry.

However, before you can shed a tear, footsteps approach your bed and once again you grow illusioned with Suguru, so you flip around and call out to him in the darkness of your room. “Suguru?”

But it’s not him, your eyes land on Nanami.

That’s right…it’s just Nanami.

“Uh,” Nanami breathes out awkwardly. “Here’s water, a bucket, and pills on your nightstand.”

Tears slip down your cheeks as you feel a ripping pain inside your chest. You don’t say anything on the matter, nor does Nanami add anything else, he just puts his hands in his pocket and glances at you one more time before he announces his leave.

“Goodnight, y/n, I’ll check in on you tomorrow.”

You avert your gaze and stay quiet, he takes this as his confirmation and turns to head out, but before he can you reach over and take his arm. “Kento, please don’t leave,” your voice breaks. “Please…I don’t want to be alone...I’m so lonely,” you cry quietly.

Nanami sighs and walks back to you to crouch by your side, and proceeds to slowly pull your hand off his arm to tuck it back under the blanket.

“I’m sorry,” he whispers. “I am. I don’t know what else to say but that…” he trails off and exhales deeply. “I’ll just—”

“Nanami,” another voice cuts in. “It’s okay I got it from here.”

You look over your shoulder and see Shoko walking in.

“Are you sure?” Nanami queries.

She hums and once she reaches the bed she shoves your legs back and throws the blanket aside before she lets her slippers fall off her feet. Nanami stands up and you completely forget about him as you’re filled with confusion and glee.

“What are you doing?” You ask Shoko as you turn to watch her climb into your bed.

“Spending the night,” she says mindlessly.

The confusion you just felt completely vanishes and you’re filled with overwhelming joy that makes you cry. You didn’t want to cry, but the liquor has you all loopy so happy tears roll down your cheeks now.

“Is that okay?” Shoko makes sure to ask even though she’s tucking herself in like she used to when you lived together.

You nod and quickly throw your arm around her before you snuggle up beside her. “Of course,” you assure her. “It’s better than okay…thank you,” you muster through your drunken state.

Shoko slowly wraps her arm around you and responds with a simple gentle squeeze before lolling her head on yours. Your smile softens at the feeling of her warmth embracing yours and you can’t help but close your eyes to find peace in this moment.

——

*SOMETIME LATER. OCTOBER 31, 7:30 pm*

“And here is Satoru’s juice box,” you tease your brother as you set the drinks down by their respected person.

“And you get two drinks?” Satoru rebuttals. “Feeling ballsy? I’m not carrying you to bed.”

You smile sweetly and bat your eyelashes. “The bartender gave me a tequila shot on the house because he says I make a cute birthday girl.” You shrug sweetly and sit back in your seat.

Satoru raises a quizzical brow and scoffs. “Sure you do. Anyway, for someone who hates non-sorcerers, you surely do spend a lot of time around them.”

“Well,” you sigh and pick up your shot glass. “Ieiri wanted to take me out for my birthday, and the sorcerer-only club is lame, so I’m sucking it up. Here. At this fun bar.” You grin and twist around to face your friends who came to celebrate your birthday with you; Shoko, Nanami, Larue, Satoru of course, and Mei-Mei. “Let’s all raise our cups to a fun night.”

Your friends' eyes fall on you, and they all raise their drinks.

“And to your birthday!” Shoko adds with a soft smile.

“Yes, happy 28th, Y/N,” Larue says from the far end of the table so as to not sit next to the man that killed the man he looked up to. He wouldn't have come if your brother was coming too, but it is your birthday so he made an exception. “May you continue to age just as gracefully as you are now my beloved friend.”

You push your drink towards him and flash him a warm beaming grin.

“Happy birthday y/n,” Nanami interjects softly.

“Happy birthday, little sister,” Satoru surprises you, making you drift your gaze across from you to express that surprise in a soft manner—“May you continue to live on so I have someone to annoy.”

You groan softly and lower your cup as you narrow your gaze.

Satoru chuckles and leans over the table. “Happy birthday,” he says softer.

You draw out a small breath and offer him a sweet and genuine smile.

“To y/n’s birthday!” Mei-Mei says, making everyone raise their cups in the air before you pull them into your lips and start off the night.

When you finish your shot you slide that cup aside and pull in the original drink you ordered. “Now to change the music to something actually listenable, and then we should start our first game of the night!” you interject joyfully. You can’t have yourself feeling any other way today even if it’s your first birthday without Suguru. Because if you sit and really feel what you want to feel then no one will be able to take you out of that dark place called grief.

So you’re determined to feel nothing but gratitude for those who came to celebrate with you, and joy for being able to celebrate another year. And when you get so drunk that you begin to cry about your man then it’s whatever because you will already be drunk and partied out. That will be a good way to end the night!

Nevertheless, just as you take your first step, your phone begins to ring and threatens to ruin the night just as it started.

“How come you made all of us shut our phones off, but you get to have yours on?” Satoru complains.

You peer back at him with a pointed glare. “Because I have kids at home, and you all don’t, you guys get calls from work, so no phones for any of you until the night is over.” You shoot him a sweet smile and take a look at the screen, but realize the number is an unknown one.

Thus you hang up and waltz over to the jukebox and flip through the variety of music. It takes you a minute to click through all the music and find something you like, but you eventually find the right song, and just as you’re about to click on it your phone goes off again.

“Damn,” you hiss in annoyance and pull your phone out again to check. And once again it’s that same unknown number so you answer impatiently this time. “Hello!”

“Gojo,” a familiar deep voice greets you almost distastefully.

“Yaga?” You scoff. “Isn’t this a surprise?” You laugh. “I can't imagine you’d call to wish me a happy birthday, so,” you roll out almost with a hint of nervousness in your tone because a call from him doesn’t mean anything good. “What do you want?” You ask and press on the song to play overhead.

“Are you with your brother? He doesn’t answer his damned phone.”

You blink and feel your joy begin to fade away, and that brewing storm only grows darker and more dangerous. “Yeah,” you mutter and slowly turn around to give your back to the jukebox. “Please don’t tell me you’re also looking for Nanami, Shoko, and Mei-Mei?”

“Yes, I am! Are they with you too?! Why aren’t they answering their damn phones?! I get why Satoru wouldn’t, he’s a slack-off, but them?!” He shouts, causing you to pull your phone away from your ear. “Put me on speaker, Gojo, what I have to say concerns all of you.”

No, no.

You rush back to the table and slam your phone on the table to catch all of your friends' attention. “It’s Yaga,” you announce and put him on speaker.

“Oh,” Satoru begins to say playfully as he folds his arms over the table. “Yaga? Don’t tell me you feel hurt you’re not invited to my sister's birthday bash. Well, I would’ve told you but you know, it’s for young people only, you—”

“Shut up,” Yaga cuts him off, causing you to snicker. “Since none of you are answering your phones, listen well, there’s trouble brewing in Shibuya.”

Your amused smile falls and that joy you have been entertaining completely vanishes.

“I’m sorry I have to end your night, but all sorcerers, including allies, students, and staff alike have been summoned to deal with what’s going on.”

So not you? Please not you.

“Are you going to stop edging us on already?” Shoko cuts in as she rests her chin on her hand.

“Non-sorcerers have been trapped by a veil in Shibuya and are not allowed to go out,” Yaga finally shares, making everyone around the table except for Larue, to frown and grow serious and stiff. “Come to Shibuya now, I’ll explain everything else on the way. And before you say anything, y/n, you are being summoned too. Literally, the people inside the veil keep asking for the same things, we think it’s a condition by who made the veil, they say that in order to go out Satoru and Y/N Gojo need to come.”

You groan and drop your head on the table.

“Why should I even go?” You rebuttal. “I don’t help non-sorcerers.”

Yaga huffs out and sneers through the phone. “Because your brother will be here, and all your friends will come too. Don’t they matter?! Don’t do this for non-sorcerers, do this because the lives of the people you care about could be at risk!”

You groan softly in defeat and don’t say anything now. Instead, you actually end up entertaining this mysterious invitation sent by the curse-user, or special-grade intelligent curse, much to your dismay.

You shouldn’t, you really shouldn’t listen to the plan they bombarded you with on your way to Shibuya, you shouldn’t change out of your cute birthday outfit, or take off the pretty and glittery birthday crown Satori made you.

You should be home eating more cake the twins made you, and watching a movie with your family snuggled up on the couch, or you should still be at that damn bar celebrating with your friends and your brother.

But no, you’re here. You’re with your brother a few miles away from the veil trapping non-sorcerers in, and sucking in others that were towards the middle of the veil. You’re in your sorcerer outfit and about to search for whatever is seeking you and your brother.

“They’ll probably be in the center of the veil,” Satoru says as he taps his chin. “And if it’s just us we should come at them from opposite sides and at least spook them since they’re already waiting for us.”

You blink repeatedly in disbelief and roll your eyes at him to retort. “Opposite sides? So you’re going to make me go all the way around?”

Satoru looks at you amused. “Why, I can float you there if you want. Or you can fly there, Satori says you can fly.”

You shake your head and look away. “Flying is an overestimate. I glide with the wind. You know? It supports me, I don’t fly.”

Satoru laughs softly. “Well, then I’ll go to the other side, just because it's your birthday.” He says.

You can’t help the smile tugging on your lips and nod. “Thanks. Or whatever.”

Satoru sighs and sounds serious now. “I am sorry that we had to leave the bar. Maybe we can make it up for Shoko’s birthday, hm? You two can go out and celebrate together.”

Without any other option, you nod. “Yeah. I’ll tell her about it.” You exhale and begin to notice how close you’re getting to the black veil. “At least the entire day wasn’t ruined though. I had a good day up until now. Breakfast with you and my five children was good…even if it was late,” you mumble and shoot him daggers.

Satoru chuckles and doesn’t add anything in that respect.

“So I’m grateful,” you finish in a whisper

“Good.”

You hum and just as you’re about to reach the veil you both come to a stop. “I’ll see you in there then,” you force yourself to change the subject before you want to ramble on to avoid this insidious problem.

“You know whatever happens in there, when you get out meet up with Yuji,” Satoru interjects as you both watch the black veil as if waiting for something to come out of it. “I don’t know if he’s connected to whatever’s happening here, but people still want him dead, so meet up with him.”

You place your hand on your hip and look down. “You’re acting like you won’t make it out of here.” You mumble.

Satoru scoffs. “It’s just in case things get crazy in there. Precautions.”

“Oh? You take those?” You ask sarcastically.

“I’ll meet up with you when I can, all right? So say you understand.”

You exhale deeply and roll your head up to meet his gaze with an assuring look. “Understood.” You reassure him.

Satoru nods and steps back. “It’s 8:30, I want to see you inside at 8:40.”

“I want to see you at 8:40!” You counter lightheartedly. “You’re the late one. Like this morning.”

Satoru scoffs. “8:40, or I’ll beat you up. Don’t care if it’s your birthday.”

You scrunch your nose with discontent and hum. And now without wasting another second, in the blink of an eye, he zips away. Now you have to go through the veil alone.

So much for a joyful birthday.

“Fuck this,” you grumble and let out a deep breath before you walk to the edge of that stupid veil. When you’re close you hesitantly reach for it with your hand.

And the moment the tip of your fingers touch the cold gooey texture you wait and stare at the black shield with discontent.

You’re not supposed to be here. You’re fucking semi-retired. You should be at home! Damn it!

You draw in another deep breath and finally step inside. Once you see the fucking calamity of people you huff out and groan.

A hood at this very moment would be excellent. But no, you didn't think of including one in your outfit. Now you’ll be recognized for sure. Damn it. Damn, damn!

Whatever, there’s nothing you can do about it now but keep your head low and push through.

Of course, as you do push towards the center where a second veil is trapping non-sorcerers inside and holding whoever is looking for you both, people begin to recognize you when they manage to catch glimpses of you. You do your best to ignore them and keep yourself to the least crowded sides.

Alas more and more people recognize you and those who do have genuine interest, and those who just want a picture for likes, begin to follow you and crowd you, so you begin to run to avoid having them distract you and escape through a backdoor in the station.

That’s one thing you can be grateful for that the school provided for you, knowledge of secret entrances through buildings and stations!

You imagine there’ll be more people, but for now, you’re in the clear.

Or at least you thought so, because just as you were about to exit the building and walk out to the tunnel, you hear footsteps approaching, so you stop and wait. In case it’s some enemy then you’ll fight them, if it’s another sorcerer or a starstruck fan then you’ll shoo ‘em away.

“Go away,” you break the silence as the footsteps find you and stop a few paces away from you. “Or I’ll make you.”

“Y/N.”

No.

You spin around on your heels and come face to face with Nanako and Mimiko.

“Wh…” you gasp and take long strides to reach them and grab them forcefully by the shoulders. “What are you two doing here? Go home!” You say without any sense of endearment. “Now!”

Nanako pulls her arm away from your grip and rebuttals for her and her sister. “No, we…” she pauses and glances at Mimiko nervously and then looks back at you and continues. “We want to help you, we’re old now. We know how to fight, we came to help.”

You shake your head and push them back. “No,” you counter sharply. “I don’t want your help, I have enough help. Go home, go to sleep, and when you wake up I’ll be there. Just go home.”

Nanako digs her heels in the ground and swats your hand off her before taking your other hand off Mimiko to argue back. “No! We’re not going home, and if you find some way to make us then we’ll come back because the truth is that we want to help you.”

You blink with surprise and swallow back nervously.

“We just want to help you,” Mimiko adds softly. “Geto and you taught us a lot. We’re strong because of the two of you. So we can do this, trust us just like how you trusted us last year.”

You step back and drop your head to let out a frustrated breath and think.

You did trust them last year, but the curses that invaded the streets were under Suguru’s control and they worked with the twins. There may not be curses here now, but there’s a chance they’ll appear, and they don’t work for them this time. This time whatever is here won't spare them because they’re young just like how they would’ve been spared last year by the opposing side. They’re in real danger now.

But they’re right, they’ll come back if you send them away and they’ll probably face more danger because of it, so…

You have to trust them. You have to trust that they’ll do the right thing and be smart. You have to let them spread their wings so they can learn to fly on their own.

So if they want to help then you’ll let them. You’ll trust them.

“Fine,” you sigh and face them. “Fine. But get out of here and wait if there’s trouble. Don’t get in the way, and run. There’s nothing wrong with running away, okay? Go home and just let me know. Yes?”

Nanako and Mimiko share a surprised look before they smile at each other and then at you.

“We will,” Mimiko assures you.

You draw out a nervous deep breath and walk over to them to embrace them. “Be careful. Keep your phone on, and answer me when I call.”

The twins wrap their arms around you and you squeeze them tighter against you.

“You be careful too,” Nanako says. “Don’t be stupid.”

You laugh softly. “Yeah, I’ll try not to be. You don’t be stupid either.”

“You’ve taught us to be better,” Mimiko praises you.

You smile and pull back to take one more look at them. “Careful. Run. Get out of the way, and if there’s trouble and you can’t reach me and need help, call Nanami. Or one of the kids, you became friends with Nobara, Fushiguro, and Itadori, they’ll be more than happy to help. Okay?”

Mimiko nods and you return the nod and step back. “I’m late to meet up with my brother, so I’ll trust that you will get out of the station. Be careful, and I love the two of you.” You shoot them one last smile before you turn and jog out to the tunnel.

Now back to this mess. Fuck. It, or whatever the fuck better be here.

And your gut better be right, you’re just following your gut as you jog through this dimly lit tunnel. Whatever invited you here could be anywhere through the second veil you easily passed through.

And! No curse better jump out while you’re in the dark.

Please no, please no, you keep muttering to yourself until you hear voices echoing as you approach the light at the end of the tunnel. And as you get closer you make out your brother, thankfully.

However, before you can be seen, or heard, you change your jog to a stride and stop just before you can step out of the shadows to examine the area.

You see your brother. He’s too tall not to spot right away. He’s going on about something you tune out for now.

You also see that tall and white curse that has twigs for eyes, the nature curse, or whatever. Next to it is volcano head, the curse Satoru said he beheaded. And next to volcano head is a person. Not a curse, an actual person.

He’s new and has not been mentioned by Satoru, or reported by the students. He’s not patch face either; this guy lacks blue hair and that raggedy black shirt Itadori said he wears.

No, this guy across from you is wearing a robe underneath a tight purple vest thing that covers his robe and sinches his waist. This guy has dark brown hair and wears buns on his head. This guy is new. And this guy is turning his head!

Shit, shit!

You back up, but his brown eyes still meet your gaze hidden in the shadows. This guy…this guy with a black mark over his nose, and light purple circles over his small eyes notices you first. You’re basked by the shadows of the tunnel, but he still sees you. And as he keeps his tired-looking gaze on you, you see his thick eyebrows furrow, and his eyes slowly narrow on you, and your heart suddenly skips a beat.

He doesn’t say anything though, he slowly begins to turn his body, and you stay there and hold his gaze as you feel as if you’re unable to move from your spot. The thought that he’s mesmerizingly attractive crosses your mind, but maybe that’s because you need to get laid; it’s been too long.

Whatever the case, you ignore the thought and your crazy beating heart and finally find the will to move and step out of the shadows. Without letting go of that guy's dark and threatening gaze the entire time.

.

.

.

.

A/N- I felt butterflies writing that scene with Choso hehe…

Tagged- @deniseabad1928 @secondary-character-25 @starlightanyaaa @notsaelty @d4rno @moonnime @kodzukein @yozora7154

[simplegenius042]

Music Monday

Tagging @socially-awkward-skeleton @shallow-gravy @adelaidedrubman @strafethesesinners @strangefable @direwombat @derelictheretic @carlosoliveiraa @g0dspeeed @nightbloodbix @cassietrn @chazz-anova @josephslittledeputy @josephseedismyfather @deputyash @dephellseed @deputy-morgan-malone @trashcatsnark @voidika @vampireninjabunnies-blog @onehornedbeast @minilev @fourlittleseedlings @florbelles @corvosattano @afarcryfrommymain @skoll-sun-eater @softtidesworld @snake-in-the-garden @wrathfulrook @titiagls @inafieldofdaisies @megraen @starsandskies @ladyoriza @la-grosse-patate @thewanderer-000 @cloudofbutterflies92 and @i-am-the-balancing-point

Three songs for Far Cry The Silver Chronicles, A Radioactive Calamity of Love, Bombs & Gore and Life, Despair & Monsters. Also the last song is a song from Season 1 of Hazbin Hotel, which I'm aware isn't fully out yet, so maybe SPOILERS! Avoid the last song if you care enough. Music below:

Nadi Sinclair, a sharpshooter amongst Task Force 141, is forced to go on the run with Soap and Price in the Call To Arms duology after killing Shepard and try their darnedest to put an end to Makarov once and for all (therefore running with the metaphorical wolves after the ultranationalist leader). Though alternatively, this could be after Call To Arms, where she joins up with the Project at Eden's Gate under Alexander Khaos and Jacob Seed's tutelage, where, she literally and figuratively runs with the wolves, away from society's expectations, technology and whatnot. Song below:

"Trick or treat, what would it be? I walk alone, I'm everything My ears can hear and my mouth can speak My spirit talks, I know my soul believes

But we're running out of time (Time, oh) All the echoes in my mind cry There's blood on your lies The sky's open wide There is nowhere for you to hide The hunter's moon is shining

I'm running with the wolves tonight I'm running with the wolves I'm running with the wolves tonight I'm running with the wolves I'm running with the wolves tonight I'm running with the wolves I'm running with the wolves tonight I'm running with the wolves

A gift, a curse, they track and hurt Say can your dream, in nightmares seems A million voices silent screams Where hope is left so incomplete."

"cardigan" is a specific song that makes me think of Ortega "Ore" Brantley's final moments in The House Always On Top, as he stands in a dam that has an active nuclear warhead nearby, injured beyond belief, with one of his father's most dangerous spellcasters, Aggravor, keeping him in one place with nothing more than one hand touching his back, a fatal touch that would soon kill him whenever Aggravor chooses. And Ore reflects with what little time he has left on his loved ones, his companions, friends, family, mother, sister, the innocents killed by Urias under his watch, even the recent loss of Ryder, the Courier's presence being the cause of why he came to Hoover Dam in the first place if only because he saw a slim chance she survived and had to jump to it before it was too late. He thinks over his regret of not killing his father sooner, of being too late to save others, but also his accomplishments, over the fact his sister, and both of their students, had survived, and Ress had evolved far from the arrogant and immaturely entitled girl she started off as. And with that, when Ress finally enters the room, he makes sure to look upon her with pride, and knowing she won't be needing him anymore, verbally passes the torch to her. He has full confidence that she will end their father's blight even when Aggravor ends his life. This song can also be towards Ress as she loses her big brother, the one constant support in her life, the one person never willing to give up on her no matter how much of an ass she made of herself, the one person she thought she would walk the Earth with forever and ever due to their ageless immortality, so she would never be alone. Her big brother who took the roles of teacher, friend and father all in one, always there to guide and support her want for freedom (unlike Urias, who would have used her as a pawn), always there to say "I'll take it from here" whenever she messed up, whenever she needed help fighting. Which must be why Ore's last words, though reassuring, had hurt so much as well. Song below:

"To kiss in cars and downtown bars Was all we needed You drew stars around my scars But now I'm bleeding Cause I knew you stepping on the last train Marked me like a bloodstain, I, I knew you Tried to change the ending, Peter losing Wendy I, I knew you Leaving like a father, running like water When you are young they assume you know nothing But I knew you'd linger, like a tattoo kiss I knew you'd haunt all of my what-ifs The smell of smoke would hang around this long Cause I knew everything when I was young I knew I'd curse you for the longest time Chasing shadows in the grocery line I knew you'd miss me once the thrill expired And you'd be standing in my front porch light And I knew you'd come back to me You'd come back to me. And you'd come back to me. And you'd come back."

In The Thorned Crown of Iron Thrones, much like canon, Aegon II Targaryen isn't a good brother, nor is he a first son to be proud of (as evident by his father's absolute indifference with him and his mother's disappointment), even less a candidate to be a king of all things (sometimes he was thankful it was his half-sister who would sit the Iron Throne, though he knew that meant him and his younger siblings would be put to the sword, which was the only downside). He knew this to be true, everyone knew, even his own grandsire recognized more potential in Aemond even after his younger brother lost his eye. After the funeral of their older cousin Laena, after Aemond lost an eye to their half-sister's children for claiming a dragon which their deceased cousin had ridden on, after the arguments and screaming between everyone on both sides, for justice, for blood, for punishment, for some shred of care from the man who conceived them. And especially after hearing Corvus, the only older sibling that treated Aegon, his brothers, his sister, and his mother with more decency and kindness than their apathetic father and scornful half-sister (despite Corvus conviction to continue helping his adopted sister keep her claim), break down when father revealed the most damning and life-shattering secret about his "adopted" son (thanks Dad), Aegon couldn't handle it. Couldn't handle the shame, disappointment and hopelessness of the situation, so that night, he ran off. He ended up running off into Driftmark's woods, hoping that, maybe if he disappeared, everything would get better, that his half-sister that his father doted on more than Aegon and his siblings, or his younger brother who would do mother and his grandsire proud, or even their recently discovered half-brother, as merciful and decisive as he is (though Aegon highly doubted either father nor grandsire would allow it to happen), would sit the dreadful throne, be the ruler people wanted. Hell, he would even have Cecil to sit the throne, if it meant the self-proclaimed Royce woman would send her father, his terrifying uncle, to the Wall and marry off his siblings to noble houses willing to care for them. Not him. He wished to be forgotten, to curl up and shrink and shrink until he couldn't be seen anymore. He had not intended of coming across an ex-assassin woman who called herself Okkotsu, who had tried to murder his father back in the day and had a special connection with the recently deceased Laena. Nor had he foreseen them connecting with their troubles, through such unorthodox means. Okkotsu may not know what Aegon is exactly going through, but she knows enough to help lift his spirits up... through the power of accepting yourself as a sopping wet sad little meow-meow blorbo? Song below:

[I'm not going to include all the lyrics, just the ones I find matter to these two downtrodden losers. Also LOTS-OH cursing here]

"So things look bad, and you're backs against the wall Your whole existence seems fuckin' hopeless You're feeling filthy as a dive bar bathroom stall Can't face the world sober and dopeless You've lost your way, you think your life is wrecked Well, let me just say you're correct!"

"Wait what?"

"You're a loser, baby A loser, goddamn baby You're a fucked-up little whiny bitch."

"Hey!"

"You're a loser just like me."

...

"This supposed to make me feel better?"

"There was a time I thought that no one could relate To the gruesome ways in which I'm damaged But lettin' walls down, it can sometimes set you straight! We're all living in the same shit sandwich."

...

"I'm a loser, honey A schmoozer and a dummy But at least I know I'm not alone."

"You're a loser."

"Just like me."

...

"I'm trapped and it gets worse with every hour."

"You're a loser, baby."

"A loser, but just maybe if we-"

"Eat shit together, things will end up differently."

"It's time to lose your self-loathin' Excuse yourself, let hope in, baby Play your card, be who you are."

"A loser, just like me."

[tixdixl]

Let's do desire for your fabulous four :)

Thank you so much!! This one is going to be interesting to answer for sure.

desire: What's one thing your OC wants more than anything in the world? Are they open with that desire? Why or why not? What would they do to fulfill it?

Oisín: so this answer changes during the course of their journey. I will do my absolute best to avoid Book 7 spoilers for you, but it is very difficult to answer this without having the context from Book 7.

Early Pre-NRC - Survive the colonization befalling Briar Valley and to successfully do their job.

Late Pre-NRC - To support and cherish the fae that stole their heart, even if its unrequited.

NRC and Post-NRC - To stay connected with their families (both their actual family and their found family).

They don't start out open about literally any of this, but over time - and also depending on whether or not they are put in the corner- for one reason or another they do open up to those they are closest to. They aren't exactly open about their thoughts and feelings for a couple reasons. For starters, dullahan are traditional solitary creatures. They start out completely alone until they finally get together with Lilia, and even that is rocky at first. They dont really see a need to focus on themself when other people are far more important and involved than they are. Until of course they get the brutal awakening that keeping things to themself will accidentally and inevitably push people away. To which they immediately try to do what they can to change. And... its a long and rocky journey for them. Vulnerability does not come naturally to them. But they want to try.

Kingsley: this one is also tricky, because for a long time, his goal is to obtain his parents approval. And he is willing to do anything, including commit murder, to make it happen. But as he starts to question his upbringing... he becomes... lost. Where his goal is to figure out "what do I actually want for myself? What do I want in life?"

He isnt exactly open about any of this. He is incredibly closed off and reserved. But honestly... thats okay. He learns that he has the support of his friends regardless.

And I havent figured out what happens here exactly, but I want to. And I will update when I know!!

Emil: My poor poor boy...

He starts out wanting to save his sibling.

Then when he fails in that, he wants a goal and a purpose, because he feels he has wasted his entire life for nothing.

Overtime though, he finds a new goal. He wants to support his polycule, his friends, and his communities. He wants to show people love and compassion so that they don't ever feel like they are fighting alone in the world. He wants to make sure his loved ones are fed, and sheltered, and feel like they have a place to hide when the world is harsh and cruel. He wants to be a lantern in the darkness.

And Emil is so so open about all of this. It is in his openness that he is able to gain the support he needs to be able to grow and move forward. Its his openness that allows others to come in and show him how much he is loved and valued in his community.

René: They want to be their own damn bird lol. They want to be themself truly. They want to stop being perfect. They want to be messy. They want to enjoy life to the fullest. And they work so so hard after Overblotting to enact those changes. From escaping their father, to following their dreams, to falling in love. And I love who they are becoming as I develop them.

They aren't open at first, but that's kind of the whole point of their journey. They transform from completely closed off to open with those they trust. And it's honestly so so good.

Prompt List

Tag List: @cyanide-latte @simons-twsted-children @ramshacklerumble @inmateofthemind

@rainesol @elenauaurs (lmk if you want to be added)

[bthump]

If you would like to avoid Dungeon Meshi spoilers, please either delete this ask or just hide it away someplace until you've gotten through all the chapters labeled 'Winged Lion' or just completed the entire manga.

Suffice to say, a lot of people have been comparing Griffith or Casca with Kabru, for understandable reasons mostly regarding his appearance and how his party considers him the only person who should become Dungeon Lord, but honestly I feel like Laios is much stronger parallel/foil to Griffith?

And now since I'm about to get into the spoilers, here's a bunch of ellipses just to be safe.

...

...

...

...

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Okay assuming that that's enough ellipses to hide this:

First, there's the most obvious reason to me: they're both given some kind of breaking speech by an ascended entity which walks them through the reasons each would not want to be human, and reminds them of the kingdom-related dream they'd been pursuing. Then they accept this ascended entity's offer to shed their humanity, while drawing on a lot of bird imagery--Griffith tells IOE 'give me wings,' a baby bird rises from Laios' body before it's revealed to be his monstersona.

There's also the way that, while both Laios and Griffith are great leaders who don't mind who joins them or leaves (Laios tells Marcille and Chilchuck that if they all sell their gear, he can possibly afford enough equipment to delve the dungeon and rescue Falin entirely alone, tho it is a last resort), and the way both are dehumanized by those around them: Griffith is portrayed as being almost superhuman in his beauty and charisma, Laios is just considered hecking weird for his love of monsters and desire to eat them, and feels more at home amongst dogs and monsters.

A much weaker parallel mostly tagged on for my own amusement, but there's also how Griffith and Laios will just latch on to specific people. Griffith with Guts, of course. And there is also how Laios considered Toshiro to be his closest friend, until Toshiro finally spilled his guts about all the ways he found Laios annoying. (And then Laios and Kabru begin their...whatever it is they have going on. I don't even know if I properly ship them, I'm just seized with the need to dissect their relationship.)

Anyways! Hope you find this interesting if you do end up reading it.

I actually did read Dungeon Meshi recently lol, so this is good timing.

Wow it's v surprising to me that people compare Kabru to Griffith (or Casca) lol, gotta say idgi at all. I didn't consider any possible similarities between Berserk and Dunmeshi while I was reading actually, but you do make a good point about Laios, and yeah I can totally see the similarities there now that you point them out.

He's not too similar personality-wise, but in terms of story role and how other characters relate to them I def see what you're getting at. Also the way I found both characters going 'yeah you've sold me' to the demon convincing them to become a monster to be very satisfying moments that made me like those characters more, rather than less lol.

Interesting thoughts, thank you!

[ghost-orca]

Channeling Your Love: Chapter 4

Summary: You meet Joel as a radio host for Jackson. What more can I say?

Warnings: MDNI! 18+ mentions of masturbation, PTSD, trauma

spoilers for Fight Club if you haven't seen it I guess; And The Last Of Us of course

Tag: @queenieramm

AN: I highly recommend checking out the songs I mention because they're not only good but set the mood!  

The walk back to Jackson was awkward, to say the least, you couldn't even look at Joel as a hangover buzzed through your brain. Anytime Joel would open his mouth to say something, he’d stop himself. You arrive back at your apartment by 7 am expecting to find Ellie gone or asleep, instead you find her in your office messing with one of your radio communicators “Hello? Can anyone hear me? I’m trying to get in contact with the fireflies, my name is Ellie and I-” she stops and turns the dial off when she sees you. You blink and stare at her, “Ellie, why are you trying to contact the fireflies?” She avoids your eye contact trying to feign ignorance while blowing a raspberry, but you don’t let up in your stare and Ellie sighs “Can you keep a secret?” she asks you and you nod your head “Of course.” you answer, and her eyes have a pleading look “Seriously, you can’t even tell Joel I told you, he’d flip.” your eyes soften at the mention of his name. “Ellie, you can trust me.” You pull up a chair sitting down to meet Ellie at her level. She takes a deep breath and rolls up the sleeve on her right arm, revealing an old bite mark with blisters around it, and your eyes widen.

You look into Ellie’s eyes with concern and horror, “Ellie when did you get this?” and she looks away from you with guilt on her face. “It happened about a year ago, a friend and I got swarmed and when we both got bit, we decided to wait it out. Eventually when she turned, I realized I hadn’t. Her name was Riley…” She starts, you nod for her to continue. “This woman named Marlene who was head of the fireflies in Boston told me that I had the cure, and was having me sent across the country to run some tests and maybe even come up with a vaccine. Three weeks later I met Joel and Tess…they were smugglers.” You hold onto every word Ellie’s telling you, Who is Tess? You think to yourself. Ellie continues, “Tess didn’t make it, but me and Joel…We went through a lot of shit together and grew close. Eventually we made it to salt lake city where the hospital was, apparently all the fireflies were cooped up there with researchers who could run tests on me.” 

 Ellie begins taking deep breaths as she rubs her left hand over her bite mark. “The thing is, I don’t remember anything about the hospital, not even when we got to the building. I just remember waking up in the backseat of a truck in a hospital gown and Joel was driving.” You raise your brow in questioning concern, “What did he tell you?” you ask, and Ellie starts shaking her head softly, “He said that there were others like me, that they’d been running a lot of tests with no results, and…they’d actually stopped looking for a cure.” Ellie's head droops as she tells you this, you can tell how much hearing that must’ve affected her, “That must’ve been…disheartening to hear. I’m so sorry Ellie.” you tell her earnestly, “All the people I met who died, their deaths, I wanted it to mean something.” She says and you nod at her in understanding “And I-This sounds awful, but I feel like Joel isn’t telling me everything, like he’s been hiding something from me, about what happened in Salt Lake City.”

Ellie’s eyes start to tear up, and you take her hand into yours, “Hey, look at me sweetie, I may not know Joel like you or Tommy do, but I can tell that he’s a good man and that he really, really cares about you Ellie. He’d do anything to protect you.” Ellie is looking at you as she nods and wipes her tears with the back of her hand sniffling, “I don’t think he would hide anything from you, Ellie, I think he just…understands how important it was for you to make meaning of what you’ve been through. You’re just a kid, and he knows how unfair it is for you.” Ellie hears you and responds with “mhm” and you frown knowing she’s not totally convinced. You don’t know what else you can say to her to comfort her because you weren’t there, but you trust Joel, even if you decided to push yourself away from him, your feelings still linger and you absolutely trust him. You tell Ellie to get some rest on the bed and she obliges as you set up for the day, with thoughts of Joel lingering on your mind.

 Joel spends his day mostly thinking about you, the sound of your laugh, the color in your cheeks after a few drinks or when you blush, the way your ass perked when you crawled over to him. He continued playing your moments together in his head, Why did she push me away like that? He decided to head to the bar, running into Tommy and confided in him. “It was going so well, Tommy, she even let me…let me kiss her.” Joel starts to blush as he says this and Tommy shakes his head as he starts to laugh at him. Joel downs his glass of whiskey and slams it on the table, “What’s so damn funny?” he asks as Tommy takes a sip of his drink holding back more laughter, “Nothin’, it’s just, you sound like a damn high schooler Joel, it’s almost embarrassin’ to see you like this.” Tommy starts to chuckle again as he pats Joel on his back. Joel scrunches his face in anger, “Yeah well it wasn’t funny for me! They went into the bathroom…crying.” Tommy goes silent and looks his brother in the eyes, “The hell did you do to her Joel?” he asks sternly, “Nothing! I didn’t do…anything, one second we’re dancing and- well, kissing and the next, she tells me to take my fucking hands off of her” Joel looks up at the bartender and waves his empty glass to gesture for another drink.

 Tommy nods and thinks, “Y’know, when our host first came to Jackson, she looked…real bad.” Joel leans in and his hand balls into a fist on the bar table. Tommy blinks and turns his head away taking another sip of his drink, “Well, Eugene, he was the one who brought ‘em to Jackson, and our host is pretty close with him, s’why only he can call her ‘Ash’, I think. He told me and Maria not to- not to ask her too much, that she had clearly been through a lot.” Joel receives his second drink and takes a sip, not breaking eye contact with Tommy. Tommy sighs, “The thing is, I was in communication with this man over the radio, I think his name was Adam, when we were looking to find some people who might’ve needed help when we started establishing Jackson. This was a lil’ before our host came here.” Tommy is tapping his fingers against the table, “He came out to visit, n’ he said he needed to ‘get his girl’s approval first’, I asked him why he didn't bring or mention her before, n’ he said that she was just shy. Mind you, Adam was a really swell guy, we’d talked on the radio for weeks before we met.” Tommy takes another sip, “It seemed suspicious to me, but he also seemed like a nice enough man, so I didn’t question it. Three weeks later Eugene tells me he got in contact with a young lady from the same outpost, and he goes to pick her up. When they came back, I expected Adam to be with ‘em, but it was just her and Eugene, and she looked….” Tommy starts shaking his head slowly. Joel starts feeling a familiar anger fuel inside of him, and his lips pull into a straight line as he nods aggressively, downing his whole drink in one go. 

 Suddenly Joel and Tommy hear your voice from the radio and turn around in their chairs to face the radio playing, “So, I’ve been thinking about all the music that could’ve been, and I mourn. I mourn for all the songs that were never made because of what our world took from us. The possibilities of it all are, fucking endless. BUT- it makes me so grateful for what we have- I see it all as a gift, the music I mean- that we have it. *Sigh* I’m rambling I know, any who-here's Last Goodbye by Jeff Buckley” The music plays out as Tommy gives Joel a look, “How’re you feeling big brother?” Joel shakes his head, “I really like her, Tommy” still holding his empty glass in hand, Tommy nods, “Then you oughta tell her that.” he tells him. “Tommy, I can’t, she was really-really cold towards me afterwards, I think I just need to…to give them some space.” Tommy chuckles again, “Sure big brother, but don't ya hafta pick up Ellie from their place tonight?” Joel’s face strains at the realization, “Shit.” he blurts, and Tommy snorts at Joel’s realization. 

 Joel stands at your doorway, feeling unsure if he should even knock. Eventually knocking, he waits and Ellie answers the door, smiling at him, Joel smiles back “Hey kiddo, heard you on the radio last night, you did great.” Ellie’s eyes lightened up and remembered that you and Joel had gone on patrol together the day prior, hoping her surprise for you had panned out like she planned. “Thanks! You should come in and say hello to R.Q., c’mon Joel '' He tries to resist speaking up “I don’t think-” but it’s futile when Ellie grabs him by the arm and leads him upstairs excitedly. You see each other through the glass pane of your office window while Ellie acts like she’s gathering her things nonchalantly, when really she’s listening in and watching the two of you. You wave awkwardly towards him with a polite smile and nod and pretend to go back to focusing on what you were doing, Joel gives you an equally awkward single wave and slight nod back. Ellie notices this, darting her eyes between the two of you. What's happening? They’re not even looking at each other, Ellie thinks. “Alright Ellie let's get goin’, it’s gettin’ late.” Joel orders Ellie and this frustrates her, “Jeez okay man, just gimme a second!” she responds in a pissy tone, “Ellie.” Joel says to her, aggravated by her attitude towards him.

 You notice their little quarrel and walk over to Ellie helping her gather her belongings before handing her a copy of the album Pinkerton by Weezer, “This is a gift for a job well done yesterday. I think you’re really gonna connect with this one.” and smile at her as she accepts the CD from you. “Thanks” she says quietly, not looking at you, and she fiddles with the CD in her hands a bit. You remember what she told this morning, and assume she’s just going through it with teen angst to boot at the moment and decide not to read too much into her behavior. Ellie begins to exit, “I’ll see you tomorrow?” You ask eagerly, “Yeah, see ya.” she responds with no enthusiasm in her voice and you frown a little, Joel calls out to Ellie but she ignores him as the front door is slammed shut by her.

 Joel looks back at you, “I’m sorry about her” he says, you shrug with your hands in your pockets, “She’s a teenage girl, I get it” as you shrug, you feel a soreness in your shoulders and can't help but yell out “Oh fuck, OW!” You groan as you start rubbing shoulders. Joel panics and asks “How many nights have you spent sleeping on a couch?”  Your back muscles are in so much pain, you shake your head which causes you to feel more of it, “Three days? I think?” You answer truthfully, “ah that ain’t good” Joel responds, and he goes to start massaging your shoulders. You take in a long breath through your nose and breathe out of your mouth as he starts rubbing your shoulders, and you start to finally relax. You whisper, “Joel, I have to, I have to announce soon, shit, they’re waiting…” Joel continues to rub your shoulders as he whispers into your ear “They can wait”, and your head falls helplessly onto his shoulder.

Joel pushes your head back up with one hand, “As much as I enjoy that, that’s no good for your neck right now, darling” Joel tells you chuckling. You blush after you realize what you’ve done, and Joel continues to rub your shoulders with his strong hands, you feel his calloused fingers brush against parts of your exposed skin. He massages out a knot in your back, causing you to yell out a loud moan. Joel stops his hands, shell shocked, and you widen your eyes after you realize the noise you’ve just made. You jump away from Joel's touch quickly, turning around as you rub your hand on your neck, feeling embarrassed as you do.

 You fumble a bit as you avoid looking at Joel, and say “You should probably catch up to Ellie…She seemed really upset.” Joel nods, “She did, didn’t she…” he says as he begins to worry about Ellie being by herself. Making his exit, you call out to him before he leaves and he turns his head to you, “Thanks, by the way, my um- my back feels a lot better now.” You tell him as you keep rubbing your neck, cheeks warming up. Joel gives you the softest smile, “Anytime, darlin’” Joel responds and winks at you, and he finally leaves. Your face feels burning hot as you feel a knot twisting inside of you, and you cover you face with your hands as you groan, you repeat his words to yourself, “Why the fuck did I moan? What is wrong with me?” You whisper to yourself. 

 You decided to take a hot shower after the final song of the night airs, Dreams by Fleetwood Mac, as you do you start rubbing your hands over the same skin Joel had massaged over earlier, remembering how gentle his fingers felt on you. Your hand starts to slide down to your crotch, opening the lips of your cunt with your fingers. You start rubbing your clit with images of Joel flashing in your mind, focusing on his arms, his eyes, his voice. You yell out, moaning as your head falls back to land on the tiled shower wall. You hear his words plainly in your head "Anytime darlin’" and start rubbing faster as the knot you felt in your belly since Joel said those words grows tighter.

Your heavy breaths of arousal echo out in the bathroom along with the shower water falling on your naked body. Images of Joel continue to flash as you start to dip one of your fingers inside your wet hole, imagining it’s Joel’s finger instead of your own, but then you hear those dreaded words in your mind again, “Look at you, pretty little thing” and the images of another man start flooding your mind. You jolt your fingers away from your sex and your hand slaps against the wall. You focus on your breathing to calm yourself, trying not to let fear take over you, shaking your head and squeezing your eyes shut to remind yourself that you’re safe. “I’m here, not there” you repeat to yourself as a mantra to settle yourself. When you finish showering you wrap yourself up with a towel and walk to your office. Removing the dreaded box from your cabinet, you pull the lighter out and bring it up to your eye line to stare it down like you’re challenging it. You finally light its switch and fire sparks from it, “Still-Fucking-Burning.” you whisper to yourself with a sense of rage bubbling in your voice.

 The next day, you and Ellie are both in your office sitting on the floor looking through tapes and cd’s to search for any albums you may not have played on the radio before, you preferred keeping things fresh on your show instead of repeating the same songs everyone had heard before. Ellie’s been quiet since she arrived, you could tell something was on her mind but you weren’t one to pry, so you stayed quiet with her.

Ellie eventually breaks her silence, “R.Q.? Do you like Joel?” You stop what you’re doing and look at Ellie, “What-What do you mean?” you ask “I mean like-what do you think of him?” Ellie says deciding to play dumb. You sigh in relief, “I think he’s a good guy. He takes good care of you, y’know? Plus he’s kind of a dork, like you.” You give Ellie a playful soft punch on her shoulder and she smiles to herself thinking about how many good memories she’s made with Joel ever since she first met him. Her smile begins to fade when she looks at you again, wishing you would just open your heart to him. “So, if you think that, why were you so weird around him yesterday?” You look up at Ellie again in surprise, “Was I being weird? I don’t think so…” You try to brush it off. Ellie sighs in frustration, “Dude, you totally drool over him every time he’s around, I’m not dumb.”

You almost drop the CD you’re holding when she says this, “Did something happen between you guys when you went on patrol? Did he blow it? He totally blew it, didn’t he?” You start shaking your head, you’re so shell-shocked “No! Ellie, I-there wasn’t-he didn’t blow anything! There was nothing for him to blow!” You respond frantically. Ellie snorts, “Clearly.” she quips. Your jaw clenches, and you shoot daggers at her in your glare “Ellie, I really don’t feel comfortable talking about it with you.” Ellie raises her brow, “‘It’? So something did happen.” she questions. “What-no-Nothing happened, Ellie! And if you keep this up I’m sending you home early for the day.” It’s an empty threat, but Ellie rolls her eyes and grunts “Fine, fine, I’ll let it go.” she says finally.

 Two hours pass in more silence between you, Ellie takes notes as you speak through the microphone to your audience, “Do you guys ever wonder if any big celebrities are still surviving out there? Like, Brad Pitt could be living out his days in a QZ and no one would even care that he’s Brad Pitt, he’s just another guy now.” Ellie pipes up “Who the hell is Brad Pitt?” she asks, and you give an audible gasp at her before turning back to the mic “Well everyone, our dear backup host, Ellie, just asked me who Brad Pitt is and now I feel old, *sigh*. We hope you enjoy this next song, Bittersweet Symphony by The Verve while I go cry in a corner over my lost youth.” You end the recording and you hear Ellie start giggling at you “Aww I’m sorry R.Q., you’re not that old” You roll your eyes at her back handed compliment. “Seriously though, you don’t know who Brad Pitt is? Have you never seen Fight Club?” you ask her, and Ellie’s eyes light up at the name “No, but it sounds sick…Can we watch it sometime?” She asks you excitedly. 

 You think on it for a moment, flashes of graphically violent scenes and Helena Bonham-Carter’s naked body pop into your head and you grimace, “Um- you know Ellie, it’s actually a pretty…intense movie, I don’t think it’d be appropriate for you to watch at your age. I shouldn’t have brought it up.” Ellie gives a dramatic eye roll as she yells a huffy groan, “Dude, I’m fifteen! I can handle it!” She pleads, “Oh really? I thought you were ten this whole time!” You tease Ellie as a way to jab back at her for her comment about your age earlier and give her a snarky smile. “Oh ha ha, very funny.” she responds sarcastically with another eyeroll. “C’mon R.Q., please? You can’t just tell me a bad ass movie title like ‘Fight Club’ and expect me not to beg you to watch it.” You sigh, Ellie is relentless, “I don’t even own a tv set Ellie, plus I don’t want to upset Joel, why don’t you just ask him if you two can watch it?”

A lightbulb switches on in Ellie’s brain with a better idea, “Wait, that's it! We should totally do a movie night, all three of us dude! We have a TV and a DVD player, plus you’ve never come over to our place before!” You hear her idea and start considering it. I really don’t wanna spend two hours with Joel, it’ll be too awkward…you think to yourself, trying to come up with an excuse. “You know the show doesn’t end ‘till way past your bedtime, Ellie.” and she retorts, like it’s obvious “So just end it early and come over with us when Joel picks me up, Jackson will live.” you almost scoff at her idea. Ellie pouts and widens her eyes to give you her puppy dog face, “Please?” she pleads in a cute little voice, and you finally give in, “Fine, I’ll see if I can get my hands on a copy of it. Just don’t be surprised or blame me if Joel says no to the idea, okay?” Ellie hops up from her seat, shouting “FUCK YEAH!” in pure excitement and joy. 

 You have Ellie take over hosting to go out and borrow a copy of Fight Club from your friend Vincent. He was known to be an avid film collector. Having worked at a movie and VHS rental before the outbreak, he decided to save all the movies he could. He often provided family friendly movies to show the kids of Jackson on Friday movie nights. Vincent was a bit of a nerdy loner, but you enjoyed his company. When you asked to borrow a copy, Vincent went straight into his collection to search through and he tells you to keep it once he hands it to you, “I have like six other copies of this movie, please take it from me.” he almost begged. You smiled at him, “I’m sure Ellie would be more than willing to take more copies from you.” You retort, you decided to also borrow a copy of School Of Rock just in case the movie was too intense for Ellie.

You go back to your apartment and wave the DVD up in your hand when you see Ellie in your office speaking into the mic. “-oh HOLY SHIT NICE! Folks, just so you know we’re ending the show early tonight, R.Q.’s showing me the movie Fight Club for the first time-” you run over and grab the mic from Ellie’s hands and start speaking into it “Maybe, we may be ending early tonight, everyone, it depends on what Ellie’s paternal guardian says- I don't just show R rated movies to kids willy-nilly. Right Ellie?”

You look at her as you ask, she once again rolls her eyes at you, taking the mic back from your hands, “Anyways, before I was rudely interrupted I wanted to say we are definitely watching Fight Club tonight, because R.Q never takes any time off for herself, and as co-host I say she deserves a damn break!” You start growing frustrated, “Ellie-” She cuts you off speaking into the mic “Anyways please enjoy Someday by The Strokes everybody!” Ellie turns to you in your chair, giving you a shit eating grin as you glare at her. “He’s gonna say yes y’know” She tells you and you squint your eyes at her, “How do you know?” you ask and Ellie’s grin widens, “Because you’ll be there.” she responds.

 Joel had been listening to the whole broadcast the entire day from his favorite chair, putting off any plans or chores all day just so he could hear your voice through the radio. When he hears you and Ellie talk about watching Fight Club with his permission Joel immediately gets up and starts tidying up the place. Once he finds it up to code he grabs his jacket and starts running to your place, knocking on the door two hours early from when he usually comes over to pick Ellie up.

You open the door not expecting it to be Joel, your eyes widening as he pants from running the whole way, over exerting himself. He lifts himself up from his hands on his knees to smile at you and says “Let’s go watch Fight Club.” It takes a while for you to process what he’s said but when you finally realize you say “We have two hours left to air” Joel hears you and immediately feels embarrassed, “Oh, right, I can just- wait on your couch if that's okay?” He suggests, and your lower lip falls slightly. You quickly form your lips into a tight line and widen your front door to let him inside. Joel nods at you with a “Thank you” and enters, hopping his way up the stairs to finally sit himself down on your couch. Once Ellie recognizes him, she waves and smiles wide through the studio window. Joel waves back at her with an equally bright smile. 

 Two hours pass slowly for Ellie and Joel, but they feel quick for you, ending the night early with Once In A Lifetime by Talking Heads. You grab your coat and apartment keys before exiting, watching Ellie talk Joel’s ear off, “Have you seen this movie before, Joel?” she asks him, “Yep, it's been a long time since I’ve watched it though.” He responds to her, “Did you ever watch it with Sarah?” Ellie asks, Joel shakes his head, “Nah, she was too young to see it.” Ellie nods in understanding, you stop in your tracks, Sarah? Who the hell is Sarah? You think to yourself. You decide not to bring it up and follow them outside before locking your front door. Ellie watches you, “When’s the last time you even locked your door?” She asks out of curiosity, you think to yourself, “I’m not really sure, honestly. Two years ago I think? Gregory had entered my place all of a sudden after-'' You stop yourself before finishing your sentence, After I outed him for being bad at sex, you remind yourself. Joel and Ellie tilt their heads in questioning, “After what?” Ellie asks, your face strains and you shake your head, “It’s not important, let's get going.” Ellie pouts and Joel arches his brow, but they both decide to leave it alone as you all start making your way towards Ellie and Joel’s house.

 Once you make it to their house, you have a moment alone with Joel as Ellie leaves to get something from her bedroom. Grabbing him by the shoulder once she left the room you ask “Are you sure you’re okay with Ellie watching something so mature? I brought along a copy of School of Rock we could watch instead.” Joel laughs at you a little and whispers, “She’s 15, I’m sure can handle it, if there’s anything I don’t want her to see I’ll tell her to just close her eyes'' You smirk at Joel, “Hey it’s your call Joel, not mine.”

When you all started watching the movie, Ellie wouldn’t stop asking questions like, “Who the hell would ever go by the name ‘Meat Loaf’?”, “Who’s Tyler Durden?”, “‘Bitch tits’?” and “Can that really happen to guys? Joel, are you gonna grow boobs if your balls ever fall off?” The last question sets Joel off into pausing the movie, “Ellie, let’s just…watch the movie, quietly please?” Joel says as he pinches his scarred nose. You couldn’t help but focus on how attractive he was even when he’s frustrated, you found the way he held himself appealing. You were seated next to Joel on the couch while Ellie took the armchair, her way of forcing you two to sit together. Ellie apologizes in a sarcastic tone, and you suggest she bring out her notebook and write down any questions she wanted to ask after you all finish the movie. Ellie agrees, bringing out her notebook and starts writing a list of questions as the movie continues.

Anytime something lewd was happening in the movie, Joel would call out “Eyes and ears” as an order to Ellie and she would shut her eyes as she covered her ears with her hands, not without an eye roll or annoyed sigh from her each time. You would reach out and tap Ellie on the shoulder to signal every time it was okay for her to look. One particular scene starts to play out, where Brad Pitt and Helena Bonham Carter are moaning loudly together through the walls of the building as Edward Norton hears them during sit ups. Joel had forgotten to give Ellie the order and you both hear her say “Jeez, they’re really going at it!” Joel looks at her and yells “ELLIE!” and she responds “Right” as she closes her eyes and covers her ears, humming softly to herself.

The sounds of sex go on for what feels like too long as you sit in silence next to Joel, you brush your hair behind your ears and Joel looks over noticing your soft neck as you fold your legs edging away from him on the couch. Your cheeks start burning up as you focus on your breathing, and Joel listens to your soft breaths. You feel the couch start to vibrate and turn your head towards Joel, noticing his leg is shaking as he quickly looks away from you, moans from the TV speakers still playing out. He started remembering the loud moan you made when he rubbed out the knot in your back the other night, rubbing one out on his hard cock in the shower, as he replayed the sound of you in his head that same night. You tap Ellie on the shoulder when the exaggerated moans stop playing out, and Joel goes back to concentrating on the movie, placing his hand on his knee to keep it from bouncing. 

 Ellie had stopped writing down questions in her journal an hour into the movie, watching intently as the scene of Brad Pitt chemically burning Edward Norton’s hand plays on screen, practically holding her breath. You noticed she had been rubbing her hand over the clothed arm that was covering her bite mark and grew concerned, “Ellie, are you okay?” you asked softly, Joel looks over when he hears you ask this, noticing Ellie the same way you had. He pauses the movie to scooch on the couch and ask “What's the matter kiddo? We can turn it off if it’s too scary.” Ellie shakes her head, “I’m not scared, really. I actually think it’s kinda cool.” This comment concerns you both, but you decide to look past it and continue so she could enjoy herself.

Every fighting scene she’d whisper “awesome” or “holy shit” under her breath. You watched Ellie from the corner of your eye for a good remainder of the film. She had her legs folded up against her chest as she laid her chin on her knees, eyes fully locked in. An hour and fifty minutes in, Ellie’s eyes are wide with her jaw dropped as the plot twist is revealed, “They were the same person the whole fucking time!?” She looks at you, and you nod your head slowly as you smirk at her going “Mhm!” then bring your pointer finger up to your lips and whisper “Now keep watching.” then pointing to the TV screen.

 Ellie gasps as soon as Edward Norton shoots the gun off in his mouth, whispering “Did he do it? Did he kill Tyler?” and you and Joel both shush her. You can’t help but smile as the final scene plays out, Edward Norton taking Helena Bonham Carter’s hand into his as he says “You met me in a very strange time in my life.” as Where is my Mind by The Pixies plays out, you sing along. “With your feet in the air and head on the ground, try this trick and spin it, yeah, Your head’ll collapse if there's nothing in it and you’ll ask yourself….” You continue to sing along with your eyes closed as Joel and Ellie watch you.

As you sing out the final oooh note of the song, Joel interrupts you saying “You have a very beautiful voice.” You stop and realize they’ve been watching and listening to you the whole time, your face starts burning up in realization. Ellie pipes up, “R.Q, how have I never heard you sing before until now? I’ve never heard you play that song before either, is it in your special collection?” You look at Ellie, nodding, “Uh, yeah, it’s a song by The Pixies, it’s called Where is my mind, um. It’s really special to me.” You clear your throat still feeling embarrassed, “How’d you like the movie?” you ask Ellie trying to change the subject, she gives you a big smile “I fucking loved it, I gotta show it to Dina at some point.” You chuckle and smile, happy that Ellie’s happy. 

 Joel hasn’t said anything since the comment he made, and Ellie notices him just looking in awe of you and she smirks, “Y’know, Joel’s actually a good singer, too, he can even play the guitar! He’s been teaching me actually.” Joel shoots a glare and shakes his head at Ellie for over sharing as she grins back at him, “Y’know what, it’s getting pretty late. I think it’s about time you went to bed, Ellie.” Ellie’s not bothered by this, instead she squints at Joel still smirking, “Alright, g’night you too!” She gets up and goes straight to her bedroom, journal in hand, she slams her bedroom door closed. You sit alone with Joel in quiet for a short while, “Y’want something to drink?” he asks, and you nod “Just a glass of water if that’s okay, I woke up pretty hungover the last time we-I drank, honestly.” Joel nods back “Oh, right.” remembering the night the two of you had spent together.

 He brings you a glass of water, and you sit together in silence as you sip from your glass, Deja Vu you think to yourself. Joel sets his glass down on the table and speaks up, “Y’know, you never really talk about yourself unless it's about music you like.” Joel points out to you, “I mean, I don’t even know your name darlin’.” he says this as he chuckles nervously and looks at you eagerly. Your jaw clenches, “What’s there to know?” you say plainly, taking another sip of water as you don’t even look towards Joel. “Hey” Joel says as he reaches out his hand to your shoulder and gently moves you to face him “I wanna…get to know you, darlin’, we don’t gotta share our life stories but, your name would be a nice start?”

You bite down on the inside of your cheek as you lower your eyes away from Joel. “No one in Jackson knows my real name, Joel, and I like keeping it that way.” You respond trying your best to sound cold, you didn’t enjoy treating Joel this way, but your words were still true. Joel nods as he looks at you, “I get it.” he responds in a soft voice, trying to show he understands. You place your own glass on Joel’s coffee table to say “I should get going.” and get up from the couch. Joel springs into action as he says “Of course.” Grabbing your coat from his hanger and helping you put it on. You felt embarrassed yet…respectfully pampered towards.

Joel escorts you to the front door, thanking you for spending movie night with him and Ellie, before he says “Listen,” his hand rubs on his beard as he leans on the door frame, “I want you to know I’ll wait for you. Whenever you want to…open yourself up to me, I’ll wait.” You stand there wide eyed, and ask him “Why?” Joel slowly reaches his head over you and whispers in your ear “Because I reckon you’re worth the wait, beautiful.” Joel turns his head toward you slightly, leaving a soft peck on your cheek. Your breath hitches and your face feels like it's on fire as that familiar knot in your belly comes back, even tighter than before. You don’t know what to do or say, so you just end the conversation with “Goodnight Joel” in a nervous whisper, and speed walk yourself the whole way home as your fingers hang over the same spot Joel kissed you.

[shuckinbeanz]

SCREAM (Yan!GhostFace!Tama)

He also comes maskless! So check out his spoopy mug! 👻

warnings/notes: NSFW, college!au, reader was nearly ran over in broad daylight, Tamaki Slowly Snaps™, stalking, attempted murder(two times, reader nearly gets ran over & Tamaki's first victim manages to escape once), murder, Tamaki is a yandere(who knows his obsession is wrong, but he ends up snapping. and getting worse.), Tamaki & Mirio do the Billy & Stu tagteam except Tamaki is the killer of the duo, Mirio has his own darling which I may or may not write the origins of, Tamaki is the creepy kind of Ghostface due to his introverted nature he's slightly Micheal Myer's-esque and the opening scene features no Scream franchise signature burner calls!

This is gonna be a three part fic and I wanna say reader is a bit fruitloopy, too.(just because of what i have planned for the end. this is a consent blog, sooo)

~Masterlist~

Underage characters are Aged Up!

MINORS 👏 DNI! 👏 AGE 👏 IN 👏 BIO 👏 OR 👏 DNI! 👏 Head on over to @candybowbeansies please for my SFW pieces, or be blocked if you interact here! 😇

Similar to Ghostface!Baku, I cut back unnecessary parts(who cares how the minor bg characters croak ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ we’re here for the opening, the ending, and the lovin’), but there still is movie spoilers/references. Enjoy!

Tags: @dynamightsdaydream , @shadoweepingscream , @dementedinc-blog, @survivorofmath , @blackchim3ra

Tamaki was an introvert by nature. He wasn’t exactly the type of person to go out of his way for anything. Much to his chagrin, he was popular, but he only kept a small circle of friends. He was studious, and his nimble frame helped him greatly with sports that demanded dexterity.

He wasn’t exactly the type of person to go out of his way for anything.

But you caught his eye. And even though he denied it, he fell in love with you at first sight. His social anxiety would ultimately lead him to overthink things.

He knew what your favorite foods were by heart. It wasn’t right of him. He knew your favorite color(s), and he even knew your favorite subjects. It’s not normal. You always looked so pretty, bunny, oh God he’s such a creep, wearing your favorite outfits and styles.

Unfortunately, you were a victim of delinquents who’d always find ways to harass you. Usually, a few words would make them stop, for a while. 

But this tops everything they’ve done. Popularity can only go so far. 

Those laughing bastards drove an expensive vehicle they ‘borrowed’, tires screeching across the parking lot as they gassed it off campus, nearly running you over in their joyride.

You were on your rump, terrified and wailing from narrowly avoiding death, but everybody else just stood around like dumb asses. He didn’t waste a second, jogging towards you to see if you were okay. Mirio would know better what to do in this type of situation, he mused as he fretted over you, asking if you were hurt, if you were okay.

When you clung to him, something in him that was hanging by a thread finally snapped.

He decided then and there as he awkwardly and very hesitantly embraced you, he’d kill every last one of them.

~~~

It took some time, and unfortunately, his grades suffered a little. He had to spend late nights staking out the places those bastards frequented, and find out their addresses and numbers. He’d spend what time he could planning. He couldn’t get caught, now, could he?

He had to make sure he wouldn’t be.

He had a ghost mask Mirio had jokingly plastered hollow tentacle-like formations on from last Halloween. It would do perfectly. He had just the right things to hide his tattoos, too, just like the majority of his wardrobe.

It was form fitting, a black sweatshirt with deep navy butterfly printed leggings. He broke out the black leather boots he'd never worn before just for this, too.

One of the ones who mercilessly bullied you had to work the last hours working their family bookstore tonight. They were probably bored out of their mind, and what better electrifying thrill to face imminent death? But he wanted to have a little fun, first.

Mirio lived nearby, and with a beloved of his own, he'd be more than happy to help after hearing what those bastards did to you.

Devices in hand and a plan in mind, he thinks; yes. Yes...they would do perfectly as the opening scene.

He can't contain the deranged grin creeping across his face.

~~~

It's the small things that make the largest of impacts. Tiny objects moved from places one knows they were, odd sounds, and small new additions. Thankfully this one was observant, much to his amusement. He'd bugged that bookstore and tinkered with it, relishing in how this bastard slowly began to lose their mind.

He watched them plant their own devices; probably pilfered from friends and family. Their shifty eyes were almost comical. Perhaps they wouldn't have nearly ran you over when they were this aware of their surroundings?

He smiles widely, a giddy feeling rising in him as he decides he should acknowledge their efforts.

Armed with the knowledge of every camera they'd attempted to sneakily place, and dressed to impress, he lingers just outside the peripheral of the devices.

It was so entertaining fucking with them, and once they caught his silhouette, they'd brought it up with their family who knew well enough the crowd they mingled with.

'Perhaps one of your friends is pranking you? Don't sweat it, it's typical.'

And as typical, they threw a tantrum, knocking over a cart of books before promptly exiting. It took several days for them to come back, needing money. He watched them mind the desk for some time, before donning the costume he'd thrown together after the sun had set, close to their closing time.

Tonight was the night he'd hunt them down, Mirio tagging along.

He skulks out of sight, loitering in the back alley where they'd come out after closing up for the night.

Unfortunately for them, the alleyway was long with twists and turns. He followed them, looking for a chance to attack. All was silent, with the exceptions of his and their footsteps, and their quickening breathing. He made sure to match their steps, stopping each time they stopped.

He expected them to turn around right away-but they didn't, choosing instead to pick up their pace, soon breaking into a bolt, surprisingly fast.

In a fit of fear and desperation, they threw anything and everything they could behind them in an attempt to block his path to them as they rounded the corner to the awaiting Mirio.

Unfortunately for him, it worked. It was tough navigating through a dark alleyway at night with a mask that limited his sight.

He curses under his breath; he was so close, too.

"Whoa, you okay there, bud?" he hears Mirio, following his mock-surprised grunt when they collide into him.

As they begin to stammer in a panic, he pulls down his hoodie and removes his mask, stashing it aside temporarily with his weapon and gloves before tugging his sleeves over his palms.

"Slow down, there. Can't understand a word you're saying--" Mirio tries to placate them as they panic,  "Someone's following me, for fuck's sake, I--"

"Oh, hey, Tamaki." the blonde interrupts, absolutely beaming as he rounds the corner. "You chasing this person or something?~" he asks as that bastard whips around, heaving a sigh of relief as he plays ignorance. "Chase...? You know I'm not that type, Mirio." he fakes a worried smile behind his sleeve as Mirio all but guffaws. "Real panicky, this one, eh?" he exclaims, casually hanging an arm around their shoulder. "Hey, hey, you're shakin' up, how about I take ya home, bud?" he starts, "C'moooon, this way or that?" overwhelming them with his sunny personality, soon whisking them off the moment they point.

"Til next time, Tama!~" he waves farewell, the double edged meaning making him seethe.

This time he failed...but he has a backup plan. He'll murder that bastard's sister.

And by pure luck, he finds her going for a night time jog in the park.

He won't let her get away, no, no, not in such a wide-open space.

She'd make the perfect...what would it be called again?

The perfect opening scene.

[tsuki-sennin]

Another year, another new town, another team, another season of PreCure to be invested in! Can't wait to take it easy this year. (<- clueless)

All joking aside, I think this'll be plenty of fun. Buuuuuut if you don't wanna see my face around here, then the tag phrase for this season is "Cure's Best Friend! What Wonderful Walkies!"

Spoilers, I guess...

-Awwwwww

-Birds... horses...

-Maaaaaaaaaaaaaaan, this is already so pretty.

-Hello there, wan-chan~!

-Komugi...

-OHHHHHH

-HOT DAMN, THAT HUGE HUNKA BEEF IS YOUR DAD?

-...is he single? Or if he'd prefer, polyamorous?

-To all the beasts of the world, we bid you good morning~!

-Wonderful~!

-Theme sure is catchy.

-Ahhhhh, an animal hospital. Just like our old pal Buki from Yotsuba-cho.

-Breakfaaaaaast~!

-Hot damn, your mom's a babe too!

-Another busybody, eh?

-Small dogs have big loyalty.

-Misses her boss already, eh?

-Komugi-chan...

-Oh, guess we've got bad guys this time around too.

-...I'mma be real, I didn't think we'd have those.

-They gave the dog nightmares, how dare

-Wan-wan~!

-Walkies~!

-A lad... and a bun....

-"Hmmmmm..."

-"BWAH"

-Daifuku-chan~!

-Ohhhh, I get it

-Satoru

-Like Sato-kun the Rabbit.

-...Taro Sato...

-...I'd kill a man for some yakuniku now.

-Magical mirror...

-Neeeeeeeeeeeeeerd!

-Hah, you like her huh buddy?

-Oh, glowy~!

-Garugaru...

-Pretty Holic~!

-Business has been booming hardcore ever since they set up shop in Aozora Town. ...I wonder what they consider when they set up shop somewhere?

-Nya....

-Yuki...

-Hide, Mayu! Hide forever~!

-"See you, cat~!"

-Ah, yep~! Typical cat behavior.

-Wonderful...

-Oh that's a big boy

-Baaaaaaalll~~!

-Shiny.....

-The dogs are riled!

-That is one huge beastie.

-Iroha Inukai's courage stands strong.

-Jesus, this ram sure is strong.

-She is at her fucking limit.

-Iroha!

-"Who......."

-Wonderful Pact~!

-Pretty Cure~! My Evolution~!

-Three! Two! Wan~!

-Goddamn, that's one snappy transformation!

-Activation, countdown, introduction. All a doggy needs.

-Oh cool, the lead's our shielder!

-"Bad Garugaru! No milk bones for you!"

-Waaaaaaaaon~!

-The dream of all manner of doggy!

-Easing pain.....

-Yeah, I'd say I'm sold.

-Free the sheep~!

-"A sheep......"

-A dog who can use doors.

-Ohhhh, the ED~!

-I see the infectious rhythm keeps on.

-...does this technically make Komugi a werewolf?

-Kimi koso Only One????? For fuck's sake, I can't escape Momoi Tarou! ...and after I tried so hard to avoid making Tsubasa jokes.

-Next episode~! Cure Friendly~!

[jazlynriddle]

Deleted Scenes Ch 2:

In light of the Estate

Summary:

Anne wasn't the only one who changed after the curse, Ominis swallowed the words, grieving once more for the brief happiness they'd had together.

A series of fill in snippets of interactions between Sebastian and Ominis in-between quests, starting with Ominis confronting Sebastian after he catches Main Character leaving the Undercroft.

Ending with a longer epilogue chapter that takes place post-game, where Sebastian and Ominis find a way to move on and mend their friendship.

Warnings: Spoilers

Link to AO3 can be found here (with additional tags)

Notes:

This chapter takes place between the Shadow of the Undercroft and Shadow of the Estate, tackling the question of how Sebastian learnt of the Scriptorium in the first place.

Sebastian sighed as he turned yet another page of the large tome he'd been thumbing through for the last two hours.

One would think that a book from the restricted section, titled Memoirs and Legends of Salazar Slytherin would have more descriptions of Dark Arts in it, but alas, the title seemed to be more misleading than he'd expected. Being ninety percent Legends and ten percent Memoirs.

"What have you got there?"

Sebastian jumped slightly as the silence of the Undercroft was broken but didn't bother looking up. Easily recognising Ominis' calm tones, as his best friend ducked under the gate's rising bars and crossed the expanse between them. Before carefully settling onto the bench beside him.

Sebastian took the moment to stretch, back aching from being hunched over a book for so long, releasing another sigh as he propped his head up on an arm and turned to face Ominis.

"Nothing much, just a book about Slytherin, though it's turning out to be more of a book about what people say about our house founder." Sebastian rolled his eyes.

"As if it's any news that he supposedly had a chamber in Hogwarts, that supposedly had a basilisk in it." Sebastian shrugged, before tipping his head thoughtfully. "Though, I suppose it's interesting to know that he might also have had an undiscovered scriptorium here too. Not much use, since it doesn't say where that might be, of course."

Ominis couldn't prevent himself from jolting at the word 'scriptorium', trying to cover up his reaction with an awkward laugh. "A-ah yes, that doesn't sound very helpful."

The silence stretched on for a long moment and Ominis cursed internally, of course the one time Sebastian actually paid attention to him, it would be when he was trying to hide something.

"I don't suppose you might know something about this scriptorium, now would you?" Sebastian's tone was sly, dragging out his words meaningfully and Ominis shifted uncomfortably at the sound.

"I can't see why you might think so, besides, you probably shouldn't look into anything like that. Anything connected to my ancestor is bound to be full of Dark Magic." Ominis folded his arms, turning to face the other direction, away from Sebastian's voice.

"Come on Ominis, none of us will be able to avoid Dark Magic forever. So, the more we know about Salazar Slytherin and the Dark Arts, the better prepared we'll be!" Sebastian reasoned, leaning away from the table, trying to get a look at Ominis' expression.

"Well I for one, would like to at least try to avoid it forever, thank you very much." Ominis tipped his chin up, stubbornly refusing to allow Sebastian to get a glimpse of his face.

Another long moment of silence passed. Unfortunately, Ominis knew his best friend well enough. This wouldn't be enough to get him to leave this alone, and sure enough Sebastian's steely voice came not a moment later.

"You might be able to avoid it, but I can't. I won't. Have you forgotten that Anne needs a cure?" Sebastian's words were biting and Ominis felt his stomach clench at the accusation in them.

"Of course I haven't!" Ominis shot to his feet, his chest burning with the urge to flee. "How could you possibly think so!?"

"Then tell me!" Sebastian stood as well, gripping Ominis' forearm firmly to keep him there, his voice pleading. "This scriptorium could hold the answers we need!"

"You can't keep doing this! Using Anne to justify dabbling in something that's irrevocably wrong!" Ominis' voice was pitched high with distress. He knew what Sebastian wanted and he understood wanting it, but he also knew what was at stake.

"I'm not using Anne! Nothing I've said is untrue! If you cared about her, you'd do anything it takes to cure her, like me!" Sebastian shouted, pulling Ominis by his arm to face him.

Ominis was glad that he couldn’t see whatever expression Sebastian was wearing, he had a feeling it would have frightened him terribly. As it is, his voice was doing the trick well enough, but Ominis knew he had to stand firm on this. Sebastian simply didn't understand the risks involved and no matter how Sebastian had changed, he was still Sebastian and Ominis wasn't going to lose another loved one. Like he'd lost his aunt.

"I'm sorry Sebastian, but whatever is in there might do more harm than good. Ask anything else of me but I shan't help you with this." Ominis shook his head, prying Sebastian's fingers from his arm and high tailing it from the Undercroft.

"I'm not going to let this go."

Notes:

I feel so weird making these chapters so short, I usually write long chaptered stories but these are supposed to be snippets between quests, so I want to split these up scene by scene like the way they come to us as quests in game, rather than long and continuous, since I don't really see the need to rewrite scenes that are in game.

I might eventually write a proper story for this game rather than a collection of snippets like this.

[agender-witchery]

I'm putting this one under a cut just so people read the first damn paragraph.

I am playing through Outer Wilds for the first time, I've beaten the base game and I'm now going through the DLC. I do not want ANY information whatsoever, spoiler or not. I want to learn everything by myself. The questions and observations I make are for me to think about and answer, not you. If you post a reply or reblog with tags that go against these wishes, you will be blocked immediately.

If you saw my last post, you know that I sum up what I know and what I want to learn after each play session and send that to my friend who's watching me play through the game. If you didn't see my last post, well now you know. I've actually had two sessions since my last post - I just never got a chance to do a full write up of the former of the two. I'll do my best to put some of it here though.

Alright so. The Strangers came from their star system to ours, presumably in search of the Eye after seeing its echo. I think that they showed up prior to the Nomai, given that they only activated the Stranger's cloaking mechanism after reaching our star system, they appear to have been killed by ghost matter, and the Nomai have no writings about the Stranger. It doesn't seem like they can return, given the fact that they seemed grief stricken when looking at slides of their home world and the fact that they're still here. I initially thought that the way their eyes go empty and their mouths split in an... unsettling manner was something the Eye caused somehow, but it turns out that empty eyes and slit mouths are just... things they do, though it's often portrayed in a sinister way. I... don't think their motives are sinister though. I think that's just how I interpret those expressions. After receiving the vision of the Eye destroying everything, they turned on it. They seemed to hold it in reverence similar to the Nomai at first, but now they seem to despise it. They're upset, they're angry, and I think that's worth respecting. Once they turned against the Eye, they went into hiding, and... I don't think they want to be found, given their reactions when I do run into them. I feel like I'm intruding, like I'm doing something wrong for reasons I don't even understand yet. I have a path to unlocking the vault, but... it almost feels irresponsible not to have an idea of why it was locked in the first place. They made it, they want it closed, and I'm not welcome. Of course, they never truly hurt me, but maybe they can't hurt me, not in a dream. I can test it, by hurting myself, so I'll do that.

I am... almost convinced that there's a living Stranger still around due to the empty bed in the Cinder Isle dream chamber. And if they're alive... they'd be underwater, to avoid the ghost matter. Perhaps a living Stranger might have a way to communicate, and perhaps they'd be more amenable to my presence than the dreaming Strangers. They might have information, and as always, I have all the time in the world to search for them.

Of course... there is the matter that there's more info to be found for me in two of the dream regions. I could blindly dive around to try and find a living Stranger, but I think searching the dream world will be more productive.

In the base game, I felt a connection to the Nomai. I could understand them and their motives entirely, and I knew I wanted to find the Eye very early on. I was working with and alongside the Nomai, carrying on their legacy, and considered a friend by Solanum. With the Strangers, I feel disconnected and adversarial. Currently, I feel like I am working against them, and the intentionally eerie atmosphere definitely enhances this feeling. I feel at unease when I'm viewing their history, more so when I'm experiencing their dream, and especially so when I've disturbed them. The information I gather is via their slides, many of which are heavily damaged, and even their visions provide little insight into why they act the way they do. There's a lot I don't understand. And I think I need to understand before I try and violate their wishes.

Questions:

Why do the Strangers act the way they do?

What is in the vault?

If there is a living Stranger, where are they?

I still don't know why the sun doesn't activate their devices, or why their fires burn green. Notably, the candles in the dream world DON'T burn green, so green is special in some way.

[autumnalwalker]

Character snippet tag

Thank you for the tag, @druidx.

Passing the tag to @writernopal, @imbrisvastatio, @alnaperera, @floweryprosegarden, @ryns-ramblings, and an open tag for anyone else who wants it.

Rules: pick an OC and post a snippet from their viewpoint.

So, this one's perhaps a little bit of a spoiler since it comes from near the very end of @thearchivistsjournal, but it's one of the few times in there that we get to hear the words of anyone other than the titular Archivist. To read the scene being described here from the Archivist's point of view, see Day 12. For Lin's description of meeting the Archivist for the first time, keep reading below the cut:

I actually made a point of avoiding you when you first washed up, especially after I heard you were going to be Archivist.  I still missed the old man and had a lot of tangled up feelings with all my good memories of the archive being tainted by sadness over his loss.  But I couldn’t avoid the place forever and I missed it as much as I did him, so I finally got my courage together and made myself go down there.

I was so nervous about how it was going to go, seeing someone else in his place, watching over our books, intruding in my place to hide from the world.  But then I got down the stairs and you looked ridiculous.  I know I should say I’m sorry for laughing like I did, but I’m still not.  I don’t mean that in a mean way though.  Seeing you there, looking nothing like him but drowning in his clothes like you were his kid that had gotten into his closet and surrounded by an utter mess was just the right kind of silly to get rid of those nerves and make me feel better about, well, a lot of things really.  I know you were embarrassed but please don’t be when you look back on that.  Under the exact context that you couldn’t have known, I don’t think you could have made a better first impression.

And I’ll admit, seeing all the books out of place and hearing they were going to be reorganized felt wrong at first.  The archive means a lot to me, and who were you to change something so important?  But then as you were talking you just got so into it.  Talking so fast you were stumbling over yourself and repeating things but smiling the whole time.  Here was someone else who really cared.  I was afraid you wouldn’t.  

As we got to talking and while I settled back into my old reading spot I started thinking maybe rearranging everything wasn’t so bad.  It was a fresh start.  A way for the archive to keep what it’s always meant to me without reminding me of what I’d lost.

From there, it wasn’t hard to start thinking of you as a fresh start.  Someone who didn’t have any prior history or associations with me to poison the present.  Someone I could do things right with.

You know I’ve drifted away from all my other old friends.  Some of the reasons I’ve told you, some I think you’ve figured out, and some you probably have an idea of now after all that other stuff I wrote.  I’ve had my problems in the past.  Still do.  But I’ve gotten better.  And I’m still getting better.

I know it was never your intention, but thank you for giving me the opportunity to try being a good friend again.  For being any kind of friend again.  I think we both know you can be alone without being lonely, just like you can be with others and still be lonely.  I was definitely the latter for a long time.  Longer than I realized, and you were my first step to getting out of that.  

[hero-deserves-to-be-happy]

5, 8 and 23 for the ask game? your takes are always awesome, i'm curious heheh :)

Aww thank you so much for the ask! It means a lot to us to hear that you think our takes are awesome. We really appreciate all of your support and would be delighted to answer these questions for you! 🥰 Short answers are below, but our extended answers to questions 5 & 8 are below the cut due to length & to hide OMORI spoilers... 😅

Questions are from this character ask game! Thank you so much for playing 😊 Warnings: OMORI Spoilers & heavier themes as seen in the game

5. What's the first song that comes to mind when you think about them?

Sleeping At Last - "Two" (Official Lyric Video) (youtube.com)

Two by Sleeping At Last is the definitive Hero song in our opinion and absolutely the first song that comes to mind when we think of him.

We have included some deeper song analysis below the cut, but for now here are some our favorite lines that remind us of Hero:

"Sweetheart, you look a little tired When did you last eat? Come in and make yourself right at home Stay as long as you need Tell me, is something wrong? If something's wrong, you can count on me

You know I'll take my heart clean apart if it helps yours beat

It's okay if you can't find the words Let me take your coat And this weight off of your shoulders"

8. What's something the fandom does when it comes to this character that you despise?

Please keep in mind that this is just an expression of our personal opinions and our attempt at respectful, constructive disagreement.

Despise is a strong word that we wouldn’t use, but we strongly disagree with the notion that Hero would not forgive Sunny and Basil. We respect the right of everyone to have their own headcanons and interpretations of Hero as a character and how he would react to learning the truth, but Hero lashing out, refusing to forgive Basil and Sunny, and permanently cutting them out of his life does not correlate to our personal interpretations of his character at all.

We view Hero at the time he is learning the truth as a mature, conflict-avoidant, and deeply empathetic person whose one (1) fight with Kel after a year of overwhelming emotional suffering, grief, and despair has left him especially sensitive to expressing negative emotions and dedicated to never repeating the mistake of lashing out at someone he loves, one of the greatest regrets of his life, again. Despite having every right to all of the complex emotions he would feel and perhaps even wishing to unleash that internal turmoil, we believe Hero's empathy for Sunny and Basil and their pain, grief, and guilt (especially given the fact that he has gone through something similar blaming himself for Mari's death all of these years) and his love and care for them as his friends & honorary "little brothers" would ultimately be stronger than any complicated feelings he may have towards them. We want to believe that with time, there would be true healing and forgiveness.

More on this under the cut...

23. Favorite picture of this character?

Sprinkles' favorite is the Hero Tags Kel picture from the Real World. It's so heartwarming and wonderful to see Hero so happy and the brothers so playful and having fun with each other!💙🧡 Acacia's favorite is Basil's photo of Hero and Mari at the beach. Hero just looks so incredibly and genuinely happy (though to be honest he looks so happy in most of Basil's real world photos), and there's something so sweet in the fact that it's this candid and organic moment of pure, unadulterated joy. You can just feel how happy he is whenever you look at this picture. Also, who doesn't love some HeroMari? They're so adorable! 💙💜

Bonus: My favorite Hero face in the entire game is definitely this one. It's just the perfect mix of kind & thoughtful and humble, maybe even a little shy too. That slight blush in his cheeks is also super endearing. It's just the perfect visual representation of how I imagine him. —Mod Acacia

Additional Discussion Below...

5. What's the first song that comes to mind when you think about them? (Continued)

Despite having found many songs that remind us of Hero in some way, neither one of us could think of a song that fits him better or more perfectly than Two by Sleeping at Last (Please see links above the cut). [A/N: I (Acacia) actually did a post about this song & how it relates to Hero on my main a while back before this blog existed, so Sprinkles and I were trying really hard to think of another song but ultimately decided there just isn't any song better suited to him so I'm borrowing from that post and answering this question on behalf of both of us.]

From the very first line, "Sweetheart, you look a little tired--when did you last eat?", this song just screams Hero. Beyond just his penchant for cooking for his loved ones, Hero really wants nothing more than to take care of people. He has such a genuine generosity and selflessness that he truly "will love you without a single string attached" and would not hesitate to put someone else and their needs in front of his own--bending over backwards to help them or make them happy, even if it is at his own expense or to his own detriment ("you know I’ll take my heart clean apart, if it helps yours beat" and "you can take the oxygen straight out of my own chest.").

While he would be the first to offer help, support, even the shirt off his back to someone who needed it, he struggles with asking for help himself, can't stand being the center of attention, and does not like talking about himself or his own problems because he deeply fears being a burden to others ("no, I don’t want to talk about myself—tell me where it hurts."). After he begins to heal from that period of deep depression he experienced immediately following the loss of Mari, Hero consistently buries his own pain, grief, and sadness--deeply afraid of hurting or burdening his family, friends, or any of his loved ones like that again (even though, of course, the ones who love him want to be there to support him, no matter what he's going through).

He knows he's wounded and hurting, but he pushes it aside in favor of helping others. When Sunny finds him at Mari's piano in the middle of the night, for instance, Hero is "fine"—immediately jumping into trying to support and comfort Sunny, but if you go back into the room immediately afterwards, Hero is crying by himself, just unwilling and unable to express his own pain and sadness to someone else. It's absolutely that "I just want to build you up, build you up ’til you’re good as new, and maybe one day I will get around to fixing myself too" sentiment.

Finally, the line "I just want to love you, to love you, to love you well. I just want to learn how, somehow, to be loved myself" in the bridge just gives me chills when I think about in the context of Hero. He is such a big-hearted, empathetic, and sincerely loving person, but he deeply struggles to accept the love and support from others that he gives away so generously.

8. What's something the fandom does when it comes to this character that you despise? (Continued)

Please keep in mind that this is just an expression of our personal opinions and our attempt at respectful, constructive disagreement.

It is hard to even imagine how incredibly difficult it would be for Hero to learn and to process the truth. He likely feels overwhelmed, hurt, upset, heartbroken, possibly even angry, and so many other stormy, complicated emotions. He is absolutely entitled to feel all of that and more, and maybe even in a certain way he wishes he could unleash all of his internal turmoil. Ultimately, however, we strongly believe that Hero at that point in his life is the type of person who would stop himself from taking all of that out on Sunny and Basil and would not staunchly withhold his forgiveness, and/or harbor this bitterness towards them.

We understand where this idea of Hero reacting badly to the truth comes from given the fight that he had with Kel several years before, but in our minds, Hero, at the time he is learning the truth, is no longer the scared, young 15/16 year old kid old who finally snapped at his brother one (1) time after months, possibly almost a year of unbearable guilt, overwhelming grief, and deep depression. We are not and will never defend Hero's fight with Kel but recognizing that it was unfortunate, hurtful, and damaging to their relationship does not mean that it is necessarily indicative of Hero as a person (especially given all of the surrounding context of the fight) and does not necessarily dictate how he would react to a similar situation (i.e. learning the truth) in the future. If anything, we strongly feel that the fact that Hero did lash out at Kel that one (1) time would be a strong motivation for him not to do anything like that again. Hero knows that he really did hurt Kel, and he probably lies awake at night for years afterwards feeling unbelievably guilty about it and worrying that his relationship with his brother is permanently and irreparably strained. We think that because of this he becomes a much more mature person who, if anything, is perhaps almost overly cautious about expressing negative emotions because he never wants to hurt someone he loves in that way again. In our minds, that desperation to not repeat what is likely one of the greatest regrets of his life would actually keep him from lashing out at Sunny and Basil, and he would instead curl inward on himself to process his complicated feelings alone.

Even if it takes him a little time to process everything, we feel that Hero would ultimately be one of the most empathetic characters to Sunny and Basil's feelings surrounding Mari’s death—particularly the guilt they feel. Hero has blamed himself for what happened to Mari all this time--mentally beating himself up for not even knowing she was depressed and driving himself in painful circles wondering if he had just reached out to her, had made sure she understood she could aways open up to him, had been more of a support to her, had better expressed how much he cared about her, had held onto her tighter, had loved her better--had loved her more would things have been different? He has carried that weight around for 4 years--blaming himself for her death, and now he sees Sunny and Basil doing the same thing--granted it's under wildly different circumstances (and there’s more culpability despite it being an accident), but the feelings & pain of that overwhelming guilt are very similar.

Hero knows what a heavy burden that is, and he is such an empathetic person that he would recognize a lot of himself and his own grief, pain and guilt in Sunny & Basil. We believe that revelation is really one of big factors in how he finally reaches a place of healing and forgiveness with them. We like to think that he has this moment where it just clicks in his head that even if he has these complex feelings about Sunny & Basil right now, they are suffering in a similar way to how Hero himself suffered for years. He knows how painful that is and would never wish that kind of suffering on anyone let alone two people he loves as if they were his own little brothers. In our minds, it's almost as if the complicated feelings he might have about Sunny & Basil due to the truth get overshadowed by Hero’s empathy for their suffering and the fact that he cares so deeply about them and that’s what finally gives him some clarity and the strength to forgive.

Finally, we feel that in reconciling himself to the situation and making peace with what happened, Hero would ultimately blame Mari’s “bad knee”/knee injury for her death more than Sunny, choosing to believe that Sunny didn’t push her that hard so it was really the fact that her bad knee gave out that made her fall down the stairs, whereas an uninjured person wouldn’t have fallen. We know from the canon that he is in college planning to eventually become a doctor at the time he is processing all of this, so he definitely has a basic understanding of human anatomy and physiology, and we think that when the haze of emotions clears that is the explanation he would reason himself to.

To Hero, at least eventually, Mari’s death is a tragic accident and any anger he might feel is ultimately directed more at her bad knee and at the fact her injury never healed correctly than at Sunny for shoving her. Whether that's because that is actually the truth of what happened or just what Hero needs to believe, we're can’t be 100% certain, but it is our personal opinion that placing most of the blame on Mari's knee injury allows Hero to reconcile himself to the truth and thereby more easily forgive Sunny and Basil.

Please feel free to check out some of our Hero Reacts to the Truth Headcanons and more discussion on this topic in this post as well.

[ikementally-deficient]

I have measured out my life with coffee spoons

Fandom: Jujutsu Kaisen

Rating: Cayenne (See Masterlist for rating descriptions)

Tags: Nanami Kento & Reader

Warnings: Spoilers for Shibuya Incident Arc, canonical character death

A/N: Title is a line from The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock by T.S. Eliot

If you had to choose an adjective for Nanami Kento, it would be ‘dry’. From his sandy blond hair to his tan suits, everything about his appearance is reminiscent of a desert, sere and arid. His rough baritone voice does nothing to mitigate the impression; quite the contrary, when everything he says is as factual and objective as he can make it. Even his cursed technique is a thing of ratios and numbers.

You’ve never been good at math. 

Words are your playground. Language can be slippery and malleable, synonyms and puns and emotions tangled up together. Words are messy and ambiguous, visceral. Even Nanami can slide into the verbal quicksand on occasion, usually when asked about his purpose in life. You’ll never forget the shock of hearing this dry, unemotional man suddenly shout “Work is shit!” with the same level of intensity other people reserve for war crimes and public tragedies.

But you know that jujutsu sorcerers all have to be a little crazy, so maybe this flat affect interspersed with moments of disproportionate passion is just how Nanami expresses that. It’s caught your attention though: you find yourself watching him, waiting for the next moment that he slips and expresses a feeling or an opinion not backed up with facts and citations.

These incidents – you find yourself calling them ‘incidents’, like you’re going to write a report on them later – slowly accumulate and you string them together like metaphorical beads, a rosary of instants that you run your thoughts over in times of quiet. You build a picture of the man: likes to travel, hates overtime, weirdly intense about bread, wears bizarrely loud ties at odds with his boring salaryman suits. Takes his responsibilities so very seriously, trying to hide the deep affection that underlies his protective attitude towards his students (“They’re not my students. I’m not a teacher,” he says, completely avoiding the obvious fact that he cares regardless of formal relationships). Puts up with Gojo’s lackadaisical approach to, well, everything, even though it clearly irritates him. 

It’s a complicated picture, when you finish assembling it. You’d expect any poem about Nanami Kento to be a sonnet or villanelle, some form with fixed rules of rhyme and meter. Instead you find yourself thinking of him in free verse, subverting any expectations. 

After Shibuya, when the dust settles and the bleeding is staunched and you have time to think and grieve, you think of him again. What elegy can you write for this complicated man? Dry, yes, but also warm and soft and occasionally tender, the little despairs that made him human blurring out of the sharp outline of the 7:3 sorcerer. He wouldn’t appreciate your grief, wet and messy and ruining the lapels of his suit, but you know he’d understand it. Maybe he’d even, if he were present, give you one of those rare nods and brief smile when you stand at his grave reciting T.S. Eliot.

Nanami Kento was indeed a man composed of odds and ends; the empty space he’s left behind is not one coherent man-shaped void, but an ongoing series of unexpected holes in your every day life. You wish you had known him better, gotten close enough to understand the heart behind the ugly tie, but instead all you can do is lean against his marker and whisper a shaking goodbye.

“You do not know how much they mean to me, my friends,

And how, how rare and strange it is, to find

In a life composed so much, so much of odds and ends,

(For indeed I do not love it ... you knew? you are not blind!

How keen you are!)

To find a friend who has these qualities,

Who has, and gives

Those qualities upon which friendship lives.

How much it means that I say this to you—

Without these friendships—life, what cauchemar!”

-- T.S. Eliot, Portrait of a Lady