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worldsmaddestscientist · 6 months ago

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> . . . WELCOME

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> INFO . . .

Hello! My name is Donatello. You can also call me Raven if you'd like, I go by both! I am an alter in a DID system. My pronouns are he/him and I use masculine terms. Though I as an alter am ageless, we are bodily 17.

You could probably guess this, but I am a fictive of Donatello from TNNT. That's my main source, though I also have a source of Cronus Ampora from Homestuck. I will probably (most certainly) make fish puns from time to time.

I am proudly both robotkin and objectum. If you are against objectums or anything otherkin then please promptly leave! ^_^ (I honestly don't know how you'd be here in the first place, though.) Anyone that refers to me as a robot gets a gold star and my stamp of approval!!!!

I have wonderful family in-sys, a super awesome matesprit, a super awesome moirail, a clown friend, and a super silly best friend (she's an in-sys friend)!! I will probably yap about them at times!!! (If Hacker and/or Jewell are reading this right now, I woll not yap about you and post without your explicit permission, dw!!!)

> DISCLAIMERS . . .

> PROSHIPPERS (especially t-cest...), PRO-ENDOS, AND ANYONE AGAINST AGE REGRESSION WILL BE BLOCKED ON SIIIGHTTT!!!!!! I DO NOT WANT YOU HERREEE!!!

> For personal reasons, please do not talk about Hazbin Hotel on my profile. I don't have anything against you if you do like it, I just don't want to see anything of it on my page. If it happens more than 1 time from someone, I will block them. That's nothing against them, it's just for my wellbeing.

> I am a huge ass nerd and geek, I will probably yap hard about stuff I like!!

> I do age regress. I may post things about age regression, though I won't post anything that will draw people to my account for regression content and will make a disclaimer on said post that my content is NOT typically for children. I DO post about things that are not appropriate for littles, I DO swear. I do not want for anything to happen here.

> We have a special interest on Friday Night Funkin, expect me to yap or geek hard if it is brought up!! ^_^

That's it for now, though more may be added! ^_^

LOGGING OFF . . .

(some tags used to reach people like me ^_^)

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zoneofsmites · 1 year ago

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IDLE I DIDNT SEE THAT YOU REBLOGGED THE DURGE ASKS! I AM SENDING NOW! 1, 6, 11, 16, 18, 22!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

that… that is so many… i am in bed already help.

Ok excuse any shitty formatting or spelling we’re doing this by phone. Most under the cut because my stars that’s a lot of questions:

1 - What circumstances led to your Dark Urge becoming their Class/Subclass?

Sylas is a triple multiclass of Draconic Sorcerer - Vengeance Paladin - Assassin Rogue. Mostly Dex based for weapons. This is 100% done out of flavor and storytelling but it works decently as a build for me. (note that I do have a lv20 mod so my level spread is a little wider).

Being a sorcerer is intrinsic, nothing led him on that path beyond Bhaal creating him. Shaped from the dead flesh of a divine being (also if I remember right Bhaal was a wizard or sorcerer as a mortal too?). He is a draconic bloodline - white dragon - as a nod to the default dark urge white dragonborn sorcerer.

He is an assassin rogue because that is the closest thing to formal training he has gotten in the temple. Stalking his prey, stab and maim - blood blood blood - before they can even see you. Whisper in their dying ears that they died for Bhaal. Proper worship.

Sylas is a vengeance paladin because… well because he tried to break away from the doctrine. Twice. Once when he was a teenager and once not long before the Grand Plan actually began. He failed both times and returned the obedient son (you cant start out as an oathbreaker but in my heart he does).

6 - How does your Dark Urge react to waking up with memory loss?

Not… well? Let’s just say he left the room he woke up in a worse state then when he got there before finally moving on.

So yes, angry. Then panic when that has faded. Ultimately he hopes it’s just a bad side effect… except then it isn’t because none of his companions are like this. With every night he gets less agitated and more afraid. Settling into his bones as this near constant dread until pieces of his past start opening up to him.

11 - What motivates your Dark Urge to either embrace or resist the Urge?

His companions.

Specifically - Donatello Arivae. (my friend Melon’s Tav).

Without Donnie around Sylas would probably… give up resisting at some point. So if I ever do an evil durge run it will be with me pretending Donnie isn’t around.

Donnie - or Sunny as Sy mostly calls him - is a devotion paladin of Lathander. He talks Sylas trough the panic and is capable of subduing him most of the time if he ever loses control. Most importantly he believes so deeply in second chances and is the only one who takes the Urge seriously from day 1.

Donnie is a solid 80% of his continued motivation.

16 - What is your Dark Urge’s greatest desire?

Wow… I mean getting rid of the Urge is the obvious one right? Regaining his memory.

Though it becomes clear at some point… that he wasn’t a good person (that he likely never was). His greatest desire then becomes to be… a good person - or a decent one at least? Someone that doesn’t need an external conscience (donnie and wyll).

18 - How does your Dark Urge feel about love?

Complicated.

For Sylas love is devotion and worship. It is all he knows. Even without memory that is what he defaults to. That worship manifest in different ways.

He worships Astarion first - it becomes a deep platonic love one day but its worship first. Sylas worships Astarion by letting the vampire use him and his blood. He thinks it’s romantic love but it isn’t. (Sylas romances Astarion until That One Conversation and admits that they would be better as friends)

He fears Donnie before he loves him - and thus worships him - because Donnie is terrifying on the field (and Sylas respects that) but most of his fear comes from kindness and he doesn't understand why that openness fills him with terror ( he can't remember not being allowed to feel such things).

Love means devotion. Love means giving part of yourself and expecting nothing in return. Worship.

Trough his journey this perception shifts and he understands love to be give and take with the relationships he has build. A healthier look on love than he ever did since stepping foot into the Temple of Bhaal.

22- What first impression does your Dark Urge give off to strangers?

“What the fuck is up with that guy?�� - most of the Gate probably.

Sylas has some odd visual quirks that look pretty… out there by even Faerun standards. His eyes are like fire, and the red leaking from his eyes doesn’t seem to be make-up on closer inspection. Other than that there’s the many scars and deep red tattoo’s.

The general impression is thus. “???”

For tieflings it is this… uncanny effect. He looks like a tiefling, but he is not. Not that they can tell what it specifically would be either but a lot of tieflings feel this weird dread when they make eye-contact with him. (I’m sure most of the grove tieflings get over that once they get to know him but it initial instinct is run).

Tysm for the MANY questions Kellan <3

Questions are from here!

#ask game #oc: sylas maeve #oc tag #zone of truth #bg3 #asks #kellan i love u sm and i would rip a man apart for you but also fuCKING HELL that was a lot kf questions in one go #I appreciate it so so so so so much 🧡#but my fingers hate u for having had to type that by phone #i miss those phone with lil keyboards

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shallowseeker · 2 years ago

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Dean's farewell tour + avoiding Cas, Part 4

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

The last bit! About how Sam runs out of options and throws a last-ditch effort to get through to Dean.

No one can be strong all the time

One of my fave things on this show is the rotating availability of strength and faith. No one has the strong position all the time. Here, in season 14, Sam and Cas are struggling to lift up Dean from his Michael-wound.

Sam is a bit lost for options. He tends to psychoanalyze in order to lock down and academize his emotions, OR he plugs in work as a substitute for truly processing.

Cas tends to go lone wolf to "spare" his loved ones danger and burden, and he is likely somewhat emotionally handicapped by The Empty Deal in this season. However, Cas has probably developed the most true resilience of the three at this point. It's interesting to watch. Sam is quite strong on the backend of season 15. Anyway…

///

Where there's a spark

So, we pick up with Cas realizing he can try to heal Donatello, and boy does he get fired up about it:

/// Quick aside: I'd like to posit that perhaps the prophets are actually getting the unsanitized, unrationalized word of God-Chuck here, considering Chuck successfully kills “first-borns” Jack *and* Mary *and* Michael *and* Dean in season 14-15, and Dean ends the series dead as well. Anyway…moving on. ///

If there's a spark-- a hope-- I have to try. That's some Resilience. Chuck didn't rebuild Cas—Cas rebuilt himself from ground up. He kept trying.

Anyway, with the "get out," I'm amused by Cas's return to rude, angelic impatience in these later seasons. He's not carefully combing his hair and aping human anymore--he's more integrated--more complete self.

Meanwhile, Dean picks up on and MIRRORS Cas's firey energy and determination. Dean is hanging on Cas's every word: "(overly vehement) We changed our minds."

This follows a very common Dean-Cas pattern. That is: one of them gives up, the other one gets angry or shows concern, and the despairing party rallies with some remewed energy. Really, that's just a SPN-family pattern, but it's a well-showcased, recurring one here with Dean-Cas.

Very rarely do they give into each other's suicidal missions. The times that they have (Cas closing heaven in season 8, Dean's soul bomb in season 11) were deeply troubling to them. As evidenced by Dean getting worked up at Cas offering himself to Lily Sunder in season 12, and Cas balking at Jack's suggestion of letting Dean die with Michael in season 14, they have become strictly opposed to that at this point in time in their relationship.

///

As Sam and Dean wait, we get more passive-aggressive sibling cattiness. Dean remarks, "Nothing's changed, Sammy." (And really, that's true to an extent. Dean is still suicidal all the way into season 15. He's still appealing to Cas about the coffin in two episodes later in 14x14.)

A leap of faith

Cas heals Donatello:

This moment is remarkable to me--the "do it"--it's quite literally a leap of faith!

He looks up into Dean's face. Dean smiles.

ON DEAN. A SMILE-- "It's a miracle."

This is played a little wry in the show, but the fact remains, Dean took a leap of faith on Donny. Will he be willing to take a leap of faith on himself?

///

The next bit is just cute. While Sam is trying to pull himself together outside, Dean and Cas are fussing over little ole' Donatello.

And Dean promptly throws Cas under the bus hahaha! I can only imagine how awkward-but-matter-of-factly Cas delivered the update to a stunned Donny. Good this he’s amoral/soulless?

After a few seconds, Donatello probably just nodded in understanding, like: "Well, Cas. While that's not exactly what Mr. Rogers would have done, I understand."

///

Sam's meltdown

Outside the hospital, Sam's spinning out. Because despite his carefully chosen words, Sam is just not getting through. Sam is smart, and smart folks try to intellectualize and solve problems; they try to follow a formula for "therapizing" tough emotions, too. Sam systemizes and compartmentalizes and, at worst, dissociates. It's a rough go.

Sam has a mixed history of dealing with Dean's big emotions. He's not always that great at dealing with them (and who could be?) I mean, he tries. He does a good job. Sometimes, he's a little pushy. But Dean won't often open up that much, because of the dynamic that he's not just Sam's brother, he's his parent. And when Dean SINKS into grief and suicidality, that's likely very likely triggering for Sam re: John's spousal grief and Bobby's lurking suicidality.

We see this at play when Sam shoves cases at a deeply grieving Dean in season 13, and when that doesn't work, he shoves breakfast beer and strip clubs. Like a child, it triggers intense fear when his parent crumbles so completely.

And Sam gets tumultuous when his bedrock foundation shifts too radically. Dean's behavior was very likely bringing back some tough memories of John, too. Because of that, even mentioning Cas would be frightening, devastating. Sam's "military-family" support system is supposed to be, needs to be strong. (They need to snap out of it, get better, and be there for him...for everyone...because there's always a war on.)

Sam made incredible strides in season 13 and seemed to equalize many of the adult relationships in his life, especially in terms of the new bunker dynamics: AU hunters, Mary, Jack, Cas, Dean. It became a sort of communal family system (common to any society not steeped in rugged American-upper-white-individualism).

But the core of the dynamic persists here. It's very human. It's scary. Dean is sort-of his brother and his parent.

////

Side note: Sam dynamics

Cas is his friend but also sort-of his parent-doctor by proxy, too. Cas is the "Nothing is worth losing you," match to Dean's "There's nothing I'd put ahead of you,"

Sam is clearly distressed when Cas goes AWOL, too. Sam’s had a lot of seesaw “parental” losses lately, from Mary to Cas to now the impending loss of Dean.

I wanna flashback to 12x19, and how Sam acted with Cas when he went after Kelly.

Dean, operates with fear and grace, understanding Cas's: "I needed to come back with a win for you...and for myself." But Sam's kinda clueless. (That's not blame so much as observation.) At that point, Sam has a "Cas is invincible and he always comes back," mentality, like how a child views a protector or father. (Like how in 13x01, after Cas is clearly dead, Sam is still asking Dean if he's really dead, like it just doesn't compute.)

Sam gets profoundly rattled when Dean or Cas get shaky. (Or gone.)

In 12x19, Sam is aware something is "off" to the point that he puts a tracker on Cas's truck! And Sam gets really disturbed when Cas runs off with a Kelly and her new baby.

Sam: How did this happen?

Dean: (Scoffs) What? The lying? The Heaven plan? Or the fact that I'm working on this stupid truck?

Sam: No, I mean, what's wrong with Cas?

Dean: Well, he hasn't exactly had a banner year. I mean, think about it. Between Lucifer (Blows air) killing Billie, Ramiel, everything's been blowing up in his face. And he's so desperate for a win right now, he can't even see straight. (gestures to truck) Go ahead and give it a try. (Sam climbs in truck)

Because Sam was raised by Dean, and due to the unstable military circumstances of his childhood, Sam expects his caretakers and protectors to be there for him and the mission, Cas included.

This dynamic starts to recover a bit in late seasons 14 and 15, when Dean and Cas more readily treat Sam as a bonafide brother-equal, not brother-child.

Sam does his best, despite these baked in dynamics, but he’s still struggling with them in season 14.

///

Sam, spiralling in 14x12

And uh, here, in 14x12, it's painful. Dean exits the hospital still sad and fatalistic. Since Sam has tried "everything," he reacts with what should read a macho slugfest, but instead reads kind of tragic and out of control:

He HITS him:

///

Cas comes outside and silently watches, assessing the fight and seeing if he should step in. Dean is so fatalistic and depressed (remember, he is still post-Michael mind-injury), he can't even fight back.

///

Sam finally grabs him in a bear hug, pleading for Dean to believe in them. Sam believes in them. Sam appeals to emotion, instead of lore or logic or magic.

Dean gives in, but he hasn't actually changed his mind. He's only relented to a stall of time.

Dean is tentatively stumbling into the shadow of hope, and he looks to Cas. He pledges to keep believing until he can't anymore.

Interestingly, Sam looks to Cas for confirmation that this is acceptable compromise for now. It's a family decision. There's comfort in Cas's nod of agreement.

Cas has clear importance here, despite that Dean doesn't even really deal with WHY Cas and even the suggestion of goodbye felt "awkward" and tense.

But something else Sam overlooked is that Cas's presence isn't just important to chipping Dean's armor--he's able to lend support to a seriously off-kilter Sam.

And that is lovely.

///

Nevertheless, it's remarkable to me that Dean is still appealing to Cas for permission to die in 14x14, and he's still keeping it all from Jack.

More on that here.

#spn scripts #my takes #spn 14x11 #spn 14x12 #spn 14x14 #cw suicide #suicide

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fangpunk · 2 years ago

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ok the ones who gave me permission to talk about them are Donatello (other one. not the restless) and redman. others are asleep or said no

so Donatello is basically like the one who makes sure everything is running smoothly in headspace. hhe doesn't care for role terms, but he does stuff like keeping track of headmates and their info, keeping track of our outersys relationships, gathering info about new members, etc. he doesn't really front. when asked about his preferred name and pronouns he just said "whatever was in canon." he's different from canon donatello physically and mentally; his purple mask is more blue, his skin is more green, his goggles are chunkier, and he prefers wearing a hoodie and only occasionally wears a battle shell. however he hates touch way more than canon donnie. (he likes being compared to source so thats why i added that section. he also says feel free to ask questions) he prefers to have the term alter used when talking about him specifically.

redman doesn't care for role terms. they look like a demon but are actually an alien. they like weirdcore and they have a tq (putting an asterisk at the start of sentences, using big words, capitalizing random words for emphasis.) their full name is redman.exe but they go by red too. their prns are he/they, with a big preference towards they/them. they prefer to be called headman when being referred to.

oooo slay! we probably should work on some more of our intros on our sys account, we only have a couple up-

i dont really have any questions, but they seem really cool!

#━✩₊̣̇.🌃 asks/ask games #━*̥˚✧☄️ mutuals #adoraboy

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sassatello · 4 years ago

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"Without the Shredder, we'd all still be pet turtles in a glass jar right now!"

#tmnt #tmnt 2003 #tmnt 2k3 #tmnt fanart #tmnt 03 #leonardo #raphael #donatello #michelangelo #art #cue mikey sying watchatalkingaboutwillis

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13o7billionyearsinthemaking · 1 year ago

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hiiiiii!!! :D mikey from shattered puzzle here! i'm stuck in the void sadly so i can't give anybody hugs(yet) :( but i wanted to wish you luck in the battle nexus and give you some stuff to stimmy stim with if you'd like it!! :3 good luck!!!! i believe in you!! <333

We're still waiting on the mail and once Raph gets his hands on it. :] >:] >:D >=))

@1v1-tmntiteration-battlenexus

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heyo-soul · 2 years ago

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Reblog to give the person you reblogged it from the energy to do one (1) chore or maybe many

#The fuck did you call me? /nm /ij #-Donatello #Nillethar #Scalemail Sys

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cae-liveblogging · 2 years ago

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Tmnt 2003 S1 Ep4

they introduced casey jones early. they usually wait until a while into the series before they do that, at least a season.

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"I finally met a guy who's as angry as I am" soulmates <3

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this intro kinda slaps tho nevermind the only good part is where they say "watch out for shredder"

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Raph was deadass about to kill Mikey

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"bro or no, you got to go"

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put down the pipe put down the pipe

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"raph, have you lost your mind!?" yes

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yeah go get some air bby

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2003 raph don't make excuses tho like 2012 raph

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casey "fiery flashback" jones

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love his accent tho

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"CUZ CASEY JONES IS ON THE JOB" DAMN RIGHT HE IS

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WHY did this lady walk into the shady ass alley

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evil laughter

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"hand over the purse sweet thing and we promise not to hurt you, too much"

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"purple draaaagooonns come out and plaaaaaaayyyy"

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"I'm puttin you punks outta business... PERMANENTLY" go casey go go go casey go

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"that guys outta control" sounds like someone i know

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"keep away from me you lizard thing!" bruh he's not hurting anyone

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so violent so fun

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two violent boys fuckin around in the street

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"we should be tricking out the armored car!"

"by 'we' you mean 'me' "

yeah pretty much

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givin mikey busy work

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can casey find another thing to call raph than "freak"? come on get original. ik you don't have many marbles but use the ones you got.

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SECRET TUNNEL! SECRET TUNNEL!!! THROUGH THE SEWER! SECRET SECRET SECRET SECRET TUNNEL!!!

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at least they're different shades of green but besides that they're nearly indistinguishable. which is exactly why they're color coded

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raph lettin loose

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post-fight clarity

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"take it ea-sy"

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manchild casey jones

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secret tunnel leads to the surface

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is there a single job that donatello doesn't have to do my favorite boy needs a break

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formally invited to a fight on friday night, what should I wear?"

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apologies brooooo i love this raph so much

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"who are you and what have you done with our brother?"

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still high key brother antics tho

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🎵busted🎵

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love how D keeps count of all the times Splinter has told them not to go to the surface

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your dad just gave you permission to use the car take it raph take it

splinters face tho

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love how mikey just covers his face with his hand while spray painting buddy do you need a mask?

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casey on his motorcycle

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dragon face

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donnie and his fun facts love this man

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why would they not know what features there are they were all working on it together.

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that is a kickass motorcycle tho

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where did raph learn to ride a motorbike?

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the front brakes??? really????? threw him of his bike :(

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akita slide :)

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track pants and trauma dumping

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love this A+ banter

casey and raph are a perfect match

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the turtle's are so short compared to casey

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C: "i can see the family resemblance"

M: "i'm the pretty one :)"

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L: "i got my split kick right! :D"

R: "I missed it, lemme see it again"

L: *does it again*

R: "one more time"

L: *happily does it again*

R: "HA! Saw that one!"

C: "i give you a 10"

L: "Raph, only 6?"

R: "hey! it's all I got!"

they are the brothers ever huh

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casey is literally the least clever man in existence

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"he's your brother" "no no no, he's your brother" "absolutely, he's your brother" i love them all

#tmnt #cae watches tmnt2003 #liveblog #tmnt 2003 #tmnt liveblog #liveblog tmnt #long post

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sisterdragonwithfeathers · 4 years ago

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Accidentally clicked on the general “TMNT 2012″ tag again

First of all, for context, I try never to do this. The TMNT fandom has a lot of criticism (both legitimate and not) for 2k12. But, I did it again, and now I gotta rant to balance out my feelings again.

To be clear, 2k12 is the only version of TMNT I have ever watched.

I enjoyed it.

At the same time, I saw its flaws and they slowly drove me a little crazy. (to the extent that I never actually finished watching the last season or so and don’t really intend to).

Now that that’s out of the way, here’s some more specific thoughts. (under the cut for length and to spare non-turtle fans)

I’ll start with what I like/think was done well:

The turtles act like brothers. One of the complaints I see about this version is how “mean” the turtles are to each other, but, from what I can tell, 2012 is actually a pretty good depiction of the normal relationship between brothers. Of course they’re immature and take it too far sometimes, but their relationship is neither toxic nor abusive.

There’s actually some pretty cool character arcs and personal dilemmas. Donatello and Timothy, Karai, even April’s slow progression of fighting skills and abilities. (lots of others, too)

The turtle’s designs. I just find them very aesthetically pleasing.

Now for what I don’t like/why I’m literally writing a bit of a re-do of the entire show:

Too little consistency. The concept is very sy-fy, but they kept throwing in random magic and mysticism. I think they should have stuck to just one of those two categories instead of badly mixing them.

Reality bends to the plot. I get that you can bend the rules a lot in shows, especially animated ones, concerning what, say, would and wouldn’t kill someone. But 2k12 took it too far. (Particularly concerning Splinter’s numerous “deaths��, especially the one where he fell something like 1000 feet and landed in a pile of cans). There’s gotta be SOME rules, or else there are never any stakes.

And, here it is, my absolute BIGGEST (and main) problem with the show: THEY COULD NOT FOR THE LIFE OF THEM FOLLOW THROUGH ON ANY OF THEIR COOL IDEAS. They had so many really interesting storylines they started, then just let drop off a cliff. Timothy, for instance. And April being a mutant (you’d think that'd have a bigger effect on her life than it did), and even April and Donnie’s relationship. All things with HUGE implications and a heck ton of potential, never realized.

Anyway, that’s all. I needed that.

#tmnt 2012 #tmnt 2k12 #just a rant

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