#swers

[agirlnamedbone]

EDIT: 1/29/25 ($380 donated towards $975 goal) I'm planning on admitting myself back into the hospital in about 11/12 hours. I'll likely be there around a week or so, and I won't be able to circulate this. It's so hard to repeat this but anything will help, especially since I'm about to lose another week of income, and likely another few days at least to recovering from another hospitalization. Thanks for considering, sharing, or donating. <3

hi, so it is excruciatingly uncomfortable to post my gofundme directly onto this post, but I've started a fundraiser to help relieve me of the backlog of an incapacitatingly large medical bill with one of my mental healthcare providers. for some odd reason, simply posting the link makes me feel less exposed (I did not want to use my picture or full name) but still humanizes me to those of you who might be kind enough to donate or share (please ask me personally if you'd like to share this off-tumblr).

DM me if you have any questions or would rather donate to my personal P-Pal.

This is so, so, so, hard to do. I understand why everyone posts those disclaimers now. But anything, anything helps. Just trying to get my life back.

[retiredprodom]

Every now and then the people I worked for would hire me out for large f3tish/k1nk/s3x parties. They always paid really really well and were usually fun so I enjoyed taking them on. A few times it was for events that had a "Masquerade" theme so I had to wear a fancy mask. The one I always wore was a silver and copper fox mask which was pretty cool.

However, the first time I got hired for one my agency asked what kinda mask I wanted, as they'd get it commissioned and made for me.

I had to be actively talked down from asking for a hyper-realistic wasp mask. I don't know why but it was just so funny to me. The idea of a party (usually like 200+ guests) full of people with masks of like cats, wolves, deer, bears etc. Then just my dumb ass in a fucking massive wasp mask.

Like yeah, sorry everyone, we know you wanted tonight's in-house dom to be a big sexy wolf daddy but unfortunately tonight we have a 6'1", 70kg, wasp freak for you to be entertained by.

Wish I could've done it that shit would've been so funny.

[arikasugar]

you don’t need to be thin to be successful in sw

you don’t need to be thin to be successful in sw

you don’t need to be thin to be successful in sw

you don’t need to be thin to be successful in sw

just be confident in who you are.

[jamieannmason]

I just shake my head when I read comments from men who shame SWers.

The way these men discredit and discount and whitewash the value of women who provide their bodies and services for compensation.

Those are the same men who believe that women are to be controlled, without human rights, barefoot, and in the kitchen. These are the same men who support male privilege, misogyny, and superiority.

But also, these are the same men with burner phones and black books with dark secrets who lie to their wives and public persona, who eagerly pay for their kink filled regular date, every Friday night, while justifying and mocking their vanilla partner who doesn't share their piss kink..

[kissmethroughthebone]

Some self-reflection...

I definitely don't respect men with kids my age who want to get it on with me. At least have the nerve to not reproduce, so that the whole "older guy going for young attractive model" thing can be just that, and not so visibly "the model is only 3 years older than your kid".

And I know my inherent misandry and impatience did a two hit combo on a guy who fit that exact description recently.

Bald middle aged Indian dude. The type of man to praise me (and repeatedly talk over me) for not drinking when we first met at a bar of a comedy show, then over text, suggest our next meet-up be at a jazz bar and restaurant.

Not the worst thing in the world, (and actually sounded like a nice tempting first meet for a Friday night; I had been interested in the jazz bar, and the restaurant suggestion was actually a favorite of mine that I had been to before.....) but, a man monologuing about how absolutely good it is that I don't drink alcohol, just to be all "Let's go to this bar and then dinner", and "You like champagne/wine/rose?" a day or so later is..... not great.

Not to mention his lack of manners in letting me get a word in edge-wise. Not a great trait, but I was open to blaming that on the noisy bar, a socially awkward personality type on him, and him being too excited to talk to a woman easily.

And of course I never believe a man when he says he wants to be "just friends"; I've never interacted with him before, and he's significantly older. The only person in my life who is 100% that, is a taken man. (Who does date girls my age, or even younger.) There's nothing that I, a 23 year old fly black girl, could be "friends" with that man, about.

And funny enough, he was also the type that got weird when I mentioned wanting to text a bit more before our meetup to get to know each other, (code for "I don't know you well enough to know if I can handle or tolerate a prolonged 30+ minute non-alcoholic beverage and dinner with you, so I wanna know about your life/politics/otherwise so that neither person has a bad shock and any time wasted",) and he was all "Well we are meeting tomorrow......... right?"

.............Rubbed me the wrong way.

Overall, let's just say I'm not interested in dates with men who want to see me for free or for very little.

My phone ended up breaking the morning of our date. 135 dollars.

I'm a strong believer in "Why would I give a man my presence, if he can't do anything for me?" I like and require all the men on my roster to be able to help. If I have multiple men hovering around and none can do a thing for me, physically, mentally, emotionally, or financially, then that's a problem.

Was I about to see a bald middle-aged man for an awkward drink at a bar, some condescending rants and impromptu speeches and monologues, and a plate of food at a decent place that I could be enjoying with a younger, cuter, richer and more polite man?

Not with a broken screen. The way my temper is, I can't stand men who want to be in my presence when I am broke. Like, why are you here?

Then he gets the luxury of looking like The Man to everyone else. Fist bumps in the bathroom from the other men there, winks from waiters, all of that. Looking like a man who can pull and has an It Factor. Meanwhile, I get a headache, that turns into a migraine.... And some enjoyable leftovers to cover up the bad taste in my mouth of being around a not great man.

And I wouldn't even have the luxury to type on here about how well (or poorly) my date had gone. Because, smashed phone screen. And yet, some man got to enjoy oggling me up and down for free.

Ew.

I know, I know. I could've strategized more. I could've gone on the date, maybe had the experience of it and seen how well I can bond with a man and play the long game. Hook, line, and sink. Make a man build an attachment first and charm him well, right?

But I also figured, "Remember the last few times when you went on dates with old men, and they usually just went on extremely stupid rants, while attempting lovebombing or perversion? Then had the nerve to hesitate to discuss allowance or not offer shit?"

Like oh suuuure, old man almost triple my age, I'll scour the Craigslist marketplace free section and haul a dingy piece of furniture home because you think it's "too soon" to be a man and help get me a dresser. But meanwhile he didn't think it was too soon to try to massage my neck in his car or ask filthy questions. (UGH I cringe, I cringe, HARD).

And I am not a patient person when it comes to things like this. Or a nice one. Like oh, you take me for a fool? You want all the privileges of my company and not want to improve my life quality, despite your abundance?

Now you're no better than an ant on a picnic blanket to me; something to flick away.

Debating on if I lean more into being unafraid to cut men off immediately (seems to be going well so far) or working on my charm, and the best ways to test if a man is generous pre-meet.....

Some ladies can do it well. "It appears I have to cancel our date tonight, I had my phone break and I have to work out the details on how I can pay for that to get it fixed", to make him have the urge to suggest helping himself like it was his idea... Or other tactics. Still have to learn, feel free to give insight.

I did a more straightforward technique of telling him what happened, how it ruined my day. He said "I hope our drinks and date can make it better". I said "I think a little money to help get it fixed could make it better, that way I can focus on just our nice date. I would like to see you tonight, I was looking forward to it."

He didn't say much aside from "Thank you for considering seeing me." Vague, and felt like a blatant dismissal or a hint to cancelling our plans. And, well, I felt relieved.

And simultaneously, a bit annoyed, frankly.

I forget how much time passed before I got a tad hotheaded, and simply said something about how not wanting to help is understandable, but I have no reason to meet as a "friend" with a man who has a college-school son my age...

Working on stabilizing my blood pressure, and also noticing that my hotheadedness is a vice at times, and a blessing at other times. Like yeah, one can say my hotheadedness stopped me from a multi-course pre-fixe meal at my favorite restaurant, but on the other end of it, I also saved myself from a man with massive red flags a week ago with this same temperament.

If being entitled to my own autonomy and standards makes the worst men ever flee from me, then let me continue on and enjoy such!

But on the bright side, I did enjoy a night at home watching video game streams and listening to the most popular rap beef right now, and if I instead utilized my time and energy to buy hair products, suffer detangling my 4c hair in the shower, adorn myself in amazing jewels and a cute outfit, and tolerated that evening with that man, I would've probably ended up cold, annoyed, and frustrated.

And instead, I had the time of my life and made massive strides for things I wanted done around my place. Even invited over L on my roster to help me clean and organize, had a great time with a hot younger guy who actually put in the work with me.

Plus it's unsafe to go out with a broken phone anyway. Not like I lived far from the restaurant at all, not at all, but still... All in all, I can picture being not great if I scraped myself together looking fly all for a man to, at the end of a date with lovebombing and gaslighting galore, to go "I can't do that, I don't know you that well!"

Better to stay home with my hair wild, peanut butter sandwiches, and a lot of blankets. My own company, always.

Anyway, ta-ta for now.

[uhliyaaah]

any other sex worker girlies on substack? I need more friends there 🫶🏾

[iww-gnv]

SEATTLE (AP) — For months, Andrea studied for her master’s degree in library sciences between dancing naked at clubs in Seattle. But then she was sexually assaulted at work and slapped by a customer — and nobody stepped in to help. Now, she and hundreds of other strippers in Washington state are fighting for statewide protections that would be the most comprehensive in the U.S., according to advocates. “We shouldn’t be verbally abused for just doing our job and existing,” said Andrea, who has seen a DJ at one club harass dancers if they don’t tip him enough. She avoids the club if he’s there, said the 24-year-old, who would only use her first name. The Associated Press does not identify people who say they have been sexually assaulted. Known as the “strippers’ bill of rights,” proposals being considered in the Legislature would require a security guard at each club, keypad codes to enter dressing rooms, training for employees on preventing sexual harassment, and procedures if a customer is violent. They would also require training on how to de-escalate conflict between dancers, employees and customers, and signs stating that dancers are not required to hand over tips.

[agirlnamedbone]

Erin M. Riley | "2014 Porn Grid" | Wool, Cotton 100" x 72" | 2016

[powerlineprincess]

Another Lamb. 2023♡b&w 35mm♡K.E.A Lux Hill

[retiredprodom]

I had a client once who, instead of writing down what she wanted from the session, just linked me to some Harry Potter overstim f3tish fanfic. 100% not what she was meant to do but she very clearly had 2012 tumblr brain rot so I let it slide. It's was written pretty badly but luckily the f3tish parts were very detailed.

She was a nice client though, took three hours of constant stimulation like a champ. Only took 20 minutes before she could stand up on her own again

[arikasugar]

What do you think about blogs that say sugar blogs are irresponsible?

put simply, I think they’re wrong.

I think many of them are coming from a good place in an attempt to look out for others. some of them may have even been part of the scene themselves and may want to educate others on the dark side of hypergamy to keep them from getting hurt, but they often do so in such a way that demonizes hypergamy as a whole, and holding views like that doesn’t help in the way that they think it does.

both sex work and the act of marrying for status, network, and wealth have been going on for a very, very long time. no amount of fear mongering or swerf ideology is going to change that. there will always be sex workers and there will always be hypergamy. they aren’t going anywhere, and vilifying those practices will only hurt those who turn to it rather than discourage anyone from doing it.

so long as sugar blogs and sw blogs operate on honesty and safety above all else, there is absolutely nothing irresponsible about it. I will always take educating others on the good, the bad, and the ugly of this lifestyle so that they can decide if this path is right for them over some watered down, repackaged purity culture meant to keep people sheltered and in the dark. but that’s just me.

xoxo

[doggirldisaster]

I really really really don’t like selling my body. But sometimes you gotta. Over the summer with the girls I knew clients would show up for some odd 350-500$ hourly prices. I finally got schooling financial assistance, and got disability, leveraging my economic status.

I got a message today after a few months of inactivity, 720$ hour. Now I’d jump at the chance for that back in July or August; but… nowadays I feel a lot more apprehensive, my social circle is missing other SWs, so I don’t have the supports I need. I’m also better off with money. And lastly and importantly; sex should really only be something I have with my girlfriend who I love so much.

So done deal- I don’t do it. I don’t need to. But that side of me who needed money in the summer sees such a ludicrously good deal and wants to go for it. It’d just hurt me in the end.

There’s also ethical qualms of Y’know. Working with children, that I should probably avoid this again at all costs.

Fuck my puppy life.

[pumpomulos]

[thoughtportal]

[agirlnamedbone]

Dana Dentata ph. Ericka Clevenger

[powerlineprincess]

2023 b&w 35mm film♡K.E.A Lux Hill