#sure the fic was well written whatever
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at random times during the day I remember this one bad sans poly fic and how it treated color and I start boiling with rage for absolutely no reason
#utmv#sans au#sans aus#color sans#colour sans#color!sans#othertale#othertale sans#utmv au#utmv fanfic#undertale au#undertale aus#sure the fic was well written whatever#but the treatment of color pissed me off for no reason so now I hate it#donât know what this says about me but whatever#houndshowlings#my hatred for nightmare probably effected things too#theres also this other killermare fic where the writing of killer pissed me off too#i hated that
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Prompt: Hug/âthis isnât a negotiation, friendâ (day 16)
Characters: Wild + Legend
Goddess, Timeâs gonna kill me, Wild thought to himself as he trekked through the forest. He was allowed to go out foraging on the condition that heâd be back at camp before sunset. He grimaced as he looked at the orange streaks in the sky fading into purple.
It had been a calm day. A few stray monsters here and there, but nothing even one of them couldnât handle. It had put most of them on edge (âit's the calm before the inevitable stormâ, Hyrule said) but they all decided to ignore it in favour of having a bit of fun. Wind and Four were by the river last heâd seen them, collecting and admiring cool rocks. The others decided to take advantage of the fact that the old man was actually willing to play cards this time and even put money on the table.
In any case, it had been a while since he left the clearing and he really needed to get back before-
He stopped.
There, on the side of the overgrown path, sat Legend.
He was sitting facing in the other direction, hunched in over himself as if heâd just been punched in the gut.
Wild approached him with caution.
âHey Legend, what are you doing?â
He came around to face the other hero and sat down in front of him. The Vet had his face buried in his knees, arms around his head. He stayed silent.
âLegend?â
âHm.â
âYou okay?â
Neither of them moved for a long while, each deciding to let the question hang in the air between them while Legend found his bearings.
He lifted his head, his face was screwed into a difficult expression, halfway between anxiousness and despair.
Wild frowned, but didnât stare. Instead, he decided to take an interest in the dandelions that grew around them.
Itâs as if he could hear the otherâs struggle as he tried to form words.
âI-â
Legend coughed, trying to untighten his throat so he wouldnât sound as choked up.
âIâm okay. I just get like this sometimes.â
It was true. They all had days where they couldnât explain why exactly they had low mood or high anxiety, but that didnât mean they needed to be alone during those confusing and stressful times.
âI donât wanna talk about it.â
âThatâs okay, but youâre still gonna have to pay your taxesâ, Wild turned his nose up in mock entitlement, crossing his arms over his chest.
âWha- what?â The look of bewilderment almost made him crack.
âIâm here to collect your taxes, dude. Now pay upâ, and he opened his arms with a blinding, over exaggerated smile.
Legend stared at him for a long, hard moment.
Tears pricked his eyes, apparently on their own accord, because he reached up and furiously wiped them away, snorting.
âYouâre stupid.â
âNah, I just know you.â
âYeah, I hate that.â
âCan you just accept the hug??â
Legend sighed and promptly fell into the Champion, making no move to reciprocate the arms that encircled him in a tight embrace.
They stayed like that, enjoying each otherâs company while any remaining anxiety and frustration ebbed away.
It took some time before either was ready to pull away. Admittedly, it was cold, and Wild was a pleasant source of heat.
Legend smiled as the last of his turmoil came to an end.
#itâs short but I have no motivation or time sooo#used this as a writing exercise#Iâm 98% sure Iâm not gonna do any of the other days like I wanted to but whatever#this is the only one I had done already#Iâm well aware Iâve already written wild#but I used the wheel of names to pick what characters to write about#and what prompt#so I wasnât biased or anything#linked universe#linkeduniverse#lu#lu fanfiction#wild linked universe#legend linked universe#lu wild#lu legend#not gonna tag time but he is mentioned#so are wind and four#jordieâs fics#fluffvember 2024#oops almost forgot that one lol#sorry my writing still sucks lmao
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i get critiquing plot holes and power differences/disadvantages and systemic things like sexism and sexualization/fetishization and racism in manga and stories in general, and i also understand loving your favorite character and wanting a certain outcome for them, but it's always a little bonkers to me that people geniuenly believe they could have come up with better endings or outcomes than the authors themselves... like i know people get attached to their favs and everything but manga and story telling is an artform and it's art that's created by a real life person who chooses to share their story with you there is no "better" ending that you could have come up with because you couldn't have come up with those characters in the first place! sure you think you could worm them around in better scenarios but even that is wishful thinking because you couldn't have, wouldn't have, and didn't come up with the world and scenes around them to navigate them in canon in the first place! idk i get wishful thinking and hopes and cracking jokes and fix-it fics and ships all that but sometimes i feel like people need to be humble and take a step back lol.... it's not your story and there's nothing for you to change, much less publicly scream about how the author fucked up just bc your favorite character didnt end up how you wanted them to.... and if u feel that strongly just like... do it in your own little online or irl community lol there's no need to scream on the internet every 3 months about how u think the mangaka who gave u the character u love so much is a piss poor artist
#delete later#like yeah i have my critiques of aot and jjk and naruto but i would never go so far as to say 'i could have written this better'#or 'x-mangaka didnt know what they were doing' bc they did..... and i couldnt have come up w those characters#there are things like ok based on events of other characters and rules about power scales#i can say i think sakura should have had ying/yang chakra abilities and i can say i think her story should have been as clear as others#but that's different than say lol sakura was NEVER meant to marry sasuke or catch up to him and naruto bc clearly she was đ bc she did#and even with jjk like sure ur attached to sukuna for whatever reason#but calling it disney kaisen and saying its cooked bc sukuna lost is crazy....#like of all the things to critique jjk on ur mad bc th evil guy the author planned to defeat was defeated........#and obvs im for making up little scenarios where everyone is happy and well and gets to do what i want thats what fics are#but thats so different than standing 10 toes down and saying gege is a trash author because nanami died#like OFC i want nanami back but the world is still spinning....#also im not saying that anyone is immune to like. the quality of their story declining bc that can 100% happen but its different#than trashing an artist just bc ur fav didnt get what u thought might happen to thenm#mie.txt
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i honestly have no idea how you judge your fic but my fave captain america fics are the not easily conquered series - pretty canon divergent, as in steve survives ice crash but imo does a really good job of engaging with the canon events and reckoning with how his life would develop in that situation; and if they haven't learned your name - written before cap 3, so entirely canon divergent post-tws, very humorous, contains possibly my favorite natasha of any fic i've read
lmaoo anon are you in my walls bc guess what i just finished reading đ i had read the first part of not easily conquered the other day and had mixed feelings about it but this afternoon i was like fuck it iâll try part 2 and that one was much better. jesus. i literally finished pt 3 not an hour ago and YEAH. still not entirely sure how on board i am with some of it but BOY did the angst hit. i was literally sat there for 100k words going ok so are they gonna get their soft fucking epilogue or not.
so based on that - brb gonna go read if they havenât learned your name đŤĄ
#as for my taste in fic: itâs actually pretty specific but fuck if i can describe how#really what im looking for is a dialogue with canon#i think thatâs the best way i can explain it#i want canon compliance/divergence/tweaks. like âcaptain america except theyâre gay frâ not âbucky barnes is a cheerleader with a twitterâ#i read enough fucking college and coffeeshop and whatever other aus people pulled out of their ass when i was 16#i want something thatâs well written (lol) and when it comes to fic that means the author has to walk a very delicate line#between indulgence and the kind of shit you get when itâs clear that the author is writing in order to pretend that their blorbos listen to#the same bands as they do. you know?#lmfao you all know exactly what im talking about im sure#i guess above all it just has to make me feel something and that something canât be secondhand embarrassment or skepticism#asks
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shout out to that one anon that has like the list of fics they've gotten off to, bc I could never
#like dead ass i couldn't tell you what i haven't and haven't gotten freaky to#rule a thumb (kinda) im pretty sure every mutual i have that has written smut#have at least one fic/ficlet whatever that ive gotten off to#well that and more ppl but still#but like moral of the story dont ever trust me to keep a list of something
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12 year old Kiwi would simultaneously be Very Very Disappointed and also Very Proud
#disappointed because Iâm 24 still single never had a boy friend no job no degree and dropping out of college soon#but proud because i drew a person and he turned out decently well#ive written a lot of fiction which includes and centers on original characters and i even have a completed 20k words fic#(and while i didnt know fanfiction existed at age 12 i would have loved it. and also just been proud at having written fiction)#i have a car of my very own#i own a nice gaming console (switch) and games for it and my family still has a working wii#12yo Kiwi would have been astounded and very happy to see the 112% completion (or whatever number it is) in botw and just how many korok#seeds i collected#she would have loved to see the 10% exploration i have in every genshin area to date#she would have been happy i have friends even tho 95% of them are online (I love you all so very much here have hugs đŤđŤ)#Iâm sure theres way more#anyways my point is i should try and be proud of where iâm at right now#even if its miles away from where i wanted to be st this point in my life#Iâm gonna try and do nice and fun things as a gift to 12yo kiwi#maybe that will help reduce the incessant negative voice in my head telling me what a complete failure and letdown and disappointment i am#also i think 12yo kiwi would have had her little mind blown at the existence of weighted blankets#and would have LOVED the loz games/franchise/etc#and also would have laughed to discover that i am still the exact same height as her#(I havenât grown since like 7th grade. i have been 5â2â for around half my life at this point#anyways i guess what Iâm saying is do what makes you happy. make little child you happy.
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something else I really love about feast and famine is how wwx isn't all 'wow lan zhan you're the best I can't believe you've been putting up with me I'm SO grateful you're literally perfect even though I'm so needy thank you so so so much' bc that sentiment arises in a lot of fics that handle his trauma or mental health and it's SO tiresome not to mention ooc. like it's not there for no reason bc wwx did express gratitude in canon and lwj IS a really good and supportive partner, but it's really refreshing to see wwx in a stable and reliable enough relationship where, except that one time he was triggered and panicking, he literally never once doubted that lwj would support and stand with him, nor did he ever feel the need to even thank lwj for being a good partner, even through the extremely heavy and difficult work of supporting him through what happened
and they DO communicate a lot, it's more that the gratitude is left unsaid because it's mutually understood to be unnecessary. and as much I'm in favor of them communicating their gratitude to each other, I feel like this dynamic for them is so much healthier and more mature and illustrates how strong their relationship is and how much they trust each other. also the idea of lwj as this...saintlike martyr who nobly supports and reassures a self-hating wwx is really tiring. he has his own struggles to be sure, but he has them away from wwx and the writing doesn't frame him as some tragic, self-sacrificing hero for it. like I love lwj but that's what it should be about, right? this was always going to be wwx's story first and foremost and I really appreciate works that let it be that
#like lwj freaking out to his brother or telling jyl about his trauma around his mom and going to support groups#that was so necessary and important for him. and wwx probably knew he was doing it. but he and the narrative didn't make it wwx's problem#OR make a big deal of not making it wwx's problem which is the more annoying and common trend#one of my early criticisms abt this fic was actually that they were TOO well-adjusted and healthy#wwx's past trauma seems to be limited to whatever made him scared of dogs and getting disowned as a teenager#which is awful to be sure but not rly comparable to canon#and in fact I was surprised his canon suicidal tendancies never showed up#but I think he was in a safe and supportive enough environment that that also made sense#like. everything possible that could be done was done. lwj came back from his trip. jyl was with him from that first morning#jc came in to help even though he fucked it up initially I think wwx clearly was really happy to have him there#he didn't have to work or worry about food or money or being alone#not that the current system is perfect obviously. like he did get a bunch of therapy and specialized therapy but#he got medical care immediately which while necessary was ALSO traumatizing and went to support groups which ALSO were horrible/demeaning#but overall compared to canon post-SS#he was able to break down and process everything in a healthy way#instead of suppressing his trauma because he has an obligation to be strong for others or to keep people alive#in canon he doesn't really have that freedom until postres. and then post-travels even#and by then things have faded with time. but I wonder if that makes it easier or harder to process them#esp since most of the people who he was close to back then are all gone#anyway. fic I think about literally constantly but idk if I can reread it all again it's very painful and heavy. like most of it but#the hospital scene is just so horrifying#not my favorite but up there maybe. I certainly regard it higher than a place to hide for exactly the reasons listed in the post#the first sex scene is so cringe tho đ I must sound like a maniac. like that post about showing ppl hxh for the first time#but it's so well-written besides that part I PROMISE#suicide tw#just a mention but eh#ficblogging
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(Poly 141 x farmer reader: John gets dishonorably discharged, and finds a new purpose in accepting your farm job advertisement, and the rest of the taskforce task force slowly mould themselves into your life
This was inspired by @devil-in-hidingâs wonderful, amazing On the Run series! Make sure to send her and the fic so, so much love! đđđ truthfully, this isnât much and it definitely didnât turn out the way I hoped it would, but I still hope itâll be enjoyable <33)
The creak of old wood and the faint hum of bees in the garden welcomed John as he stepped onto the porch of the small farmhouse. His boots, scuffed and caked with dried mud, felt heavier than ever, broad shoulders sagging under the invisible weight he carried. The sharp scent of freshly tilled earth and blooming wildflowers should have been a comfort, but John barely noticed it among all the thoughts swirling within his head.
It had been weeks since the dishonorable discharge (as if heâd ever leave his own men behind. As if.) , weeks of wandering aimlessly, a hollow shell of himself. The military had been his life, his purpose, and to be stripped of it so publicly left him untethered. The scars heâd accumulated over decades of service seemed trivial compared to this- the one wound he couldnât bandage, couldn't let heal so it could turn to a forgotten scab.
The farm job advertisement heâd found on the bulletin board of a dingy diner while aimlessly driving had been a last-ditch effort. He needed something- anything- to keep his hands busy and his mind from spiraling.
And now here he was, standing at your door.
When you answered, he was struck silent for a moment. You werenât what he had expected. A soft curve of a smile greeted him, paired with eyes that seemed to hold the warmth of the sun itself. Your frame was wrapped in a well-worn but clean dress, your body curvy and full in a way that instantly set you apart from the wiry, hardened edges of his old world. There was something disarming about the way you stood there, your hands dusted with flour, your hair slightly mussed from whatever youâd been working on before he arrived.
You were what heâd worked so hard to protect. To keep from seeing the horrors that were kept hidden from the larger public.
âYou must be John Price,â you said, your voice soft but firm, like the lull of rain against a tin roof. You offered him a hand, strong but gentle, calloused with years of hardwork. âIâm glad you came. Iâve been needing some help around here.â
John nodded stiffly, his voice rasping from disuse. âHappy to help.â He said simply, though the words felt foreign in his mouth.
You studied him for a moment, taking in the set of his jaw and the way his blue eyes seemed darker than they should have been. You didnât press, didnât ask why he was here or what had brought him to your quiet corner of the world. Instead, you gestured for him to follow you as you began pointing out the work that needed doing.
The farm was modest but well-kept, with rolling fields of golden wheat and neat rows of vegetables that hinted at how hard you worked to keep everything running. Your tone shifted as you explained things, clear and confident as you outlined his responsibilities- though you had those written in the ad as well, and so he knew what to expect. There was no hesitation in the way you moved, and John found himself admiring the way your body seemed made for this life- strong and soft, with a natural grace that made him feel clumsy in comparison. A foreign feeling to him.
The work was grueling, but John threw himself into it with a determination that surprised even him. Fences were mended, fields were tilled, and hay was hauled, the strain in his muscles a welcome distraction from the heaviness in his chest, the daily routine providing a purpose heâd been searching for. You worked alongside him every day, your hands as dirty as his by the end of it. You didnât shy away from the harder tasks, your body bending and lifting with an ease that left him stealing glances when you werenât looking.
It didnât take long for you to notice the cracks in him, though. The way his eyes seemed haunted in the quieter moments, or how he would pause, his hands clenching into fists as if fighting off a memory. He wasnât sleeping well- you could tell by the dark circles under his eyes and the way he moved in the mornings, sluggish and stiff, gratefully accepting the tea youâd make. He wouldnât talk about it, but you saw the weight he carried, and it broke something in you.
You began helping him in your own quiet way. A warm, full plate of food at the end of a long day, a soft blanket folded neatly on the porch swing when you knew heâd sit there at night. You didnât pry, but youâd offer him small comforts, like the way youâd linger for a moment longer when handing him a glass of water, letting your fingers brush his.
âYouâre doing good work here, John,â you told him one evening as you set a plate of stew in front of him. Your voice was gentle, though it left no room for argument. âThank you. Iâm glad it was you who came by.â
He grunted in response, but the faintest smile tugged at the corner of his lips. He appreciated your kindness, though he didnât know how to express it. He couldnât shake the way you made him feel- not just useful, but seen.
The first visitor arrived a few weeks later, just as you were finishing up the morning chores. Simon- whom John introduced as Ghost, military callsigns were strange to you- was as imposing as his name suggested, his tall frame and masked face almost startling you when you turned the corner of the barn.
âDidnât mean to scare you,â he said, low and gravelly. His dark eyes studied you carefully, as if trying to assess whether you were friend or foe. âHeard John was here. Wanted to check on him.â
Simon stayed, though he didnât say why and you didnât ask. At first, it seemed like he was just there to make sure John was alright, but soon enough, he was pitching in, fixing broken tools and hauling heavy loads with an ease that belied his quiet nature. He was efficient and methodical, and your german shepherd dog, Riley, adored him from the get-go.
You noticed the way he watched you, his gaze lingering when you didnât think heâd notice. Simon had a way of positioning himself near you, as if he could ward off any harm just by being close. Heâd take over heavy tasks without you asking, broad shoulders and strong hands making easy work of things that left you breathless when John was busy doing something else.
The rain brought Kyle âGazâ Garrick to your doorstep after Simon, his clothes soaked through and his face muted with exhaustion. He knocked once, and when you opened the door, his lopsided grin and the sparkle in his brown eyes immediately disarmed you.
âYou must be the saint putting up with Price,â heâd joked, though his voice was warm as you fluttered and flitted about to bring him some towels, warm food and a chance to warm up. âMind if I dry off before I drown?â
Kyle brought a lightness to the farm that you hadnât even known had been missing, his laughter and teasing filling the air like birdsong. He quickly took to the work, his lean frame surprisingly strong as he helped with everything from repairing the chicken coop to plowing the fields. But you caught the way his eyes softened whenever he looked at you, his smile lingering when you were near, and especially bright whenever youâd poke back at him.
âYou sure youâre not too soft for this kind of work, Garrick?â you teased after he groaned about the weight of a hay bale, hands on your hips.
âSoft?â he shot back, flexing an arm, and then he winked at you. âThese are prime muscles, love. And donât think I havenât noticed how you keep sneakinâ looks.â
You rolled your eyes, but your cheeks warmed at the accusation, and Kyle smirked.
Johnny âSoapâ MacTavish arrived with the same energy as a summer storm, his laughter echoing through the fields before you even saw him. âHope youâve got room for one more!â he declared, his broad grin making you smile despite yourself.
Johnny was impossible to ignore, his enthusiasm infectious. He worked tirelessly, his hands calloused but gentle as he helped. He had a way of making you laugh, his jokes and compliments leaving your cheeks warm more often than not.
He immediately took to helping you with the animals especially, affectionately naming every goat and chicken, and teasing you about how they seemed to follow you everywhere.
âItâs because they know a good soul when they see one.â he said one evening, brushing hay from your hair. His fingers lingered a second too long before he pulled back, and you pretended your smile wasnât bashful and your heart wasnât thudding faster than baby goats running to drink their milk bottles.
The four of them fell into an easy rhythm just like that, their camaraderie seamless, and you truly understood just how close of a unit they must have been.
But what you didnât notice was the way they watched over you. Whether it was John stepping in to take a heavy load from your hands or Simon silently following you to make sure you were safe, they all seemed to share an unspoken agreement to protect you.
And then there was the way they looked at you- not just with admiration, but with something deeper. John admired the way you carried yourself, your curves soft yet strong, a quiet confidence in every step. Simon found himself drawn to your steadiness, your calm presence soothing the chaos in his mind. Kyle loved your kindness, the way you always seemed to know what they needed without asking. And Johnny? Johnny adored everything about you, from your laugh to the way your body moved with an effortless grace.
One evening, as the sun dipped below the horizon, you all sat on the porch, the scent of freshly cut hay hanging in the air.
âYouâve all been such a big help,â you said, your voice soft and happy as you looked at them, Riley curled near your feet. âI donât know what Iâd do without you.â
Johnâs eyes met Simonâs, and Kyle and Johnny exchanged a glance.
âWeâre not going anywhere,â John said finally, his voice steady. âNot if youâll have us.â
You smiled, a warmth spreading through your chest as you looked out at the fields.
You had⌠truly never expected your precious little farm to become such a sanctuary for others as it was for you, but you were glad. It meant you were doing something right.
Something very right, going by the way you caught them looking at you.
At first, you hadnât thought much of it. You were used to glances- it came with being a little softer, a little curvier than most women. People always seemed to look a little longer than they needed to, whether out of judgment or admiration, though youâd long since stopped trying to figure out which.
But this? This was different.
Johnâs gaze lingered when he thought you wouldnât notice, sharp blue eyes tracing the curve of your hips and the swell of your thighs as you bent to collect eggs or reached up to pull a stubborn weed. When your skirts brushed your legs in the breeze, you swore you saw his jaw tighten, the flicker of something restrained in his expression before he turned back to whatever task heâd assigned himself for the day.
Simon was harder to read, but not impossible. He was quiet, his eyes shadowed under the brim of his cap or the mask he still occasionally wore out of habit, but there was a weight to the way he watched you. He never let you out of his sight if he could help it, always a step behind you when you carried something too heavy, his broad frame so steady and reliable it made your breath catch sometimes. When your hands brushed- accidentally, at first- he didnât pull away quickly like most men would. Instead, he lingered just long enough for you to notice, just long enough to make you wonder how it would feel to have his fingers dig into your softness.
Kyle was far less subtle. He flirted openly, grinning whenever he managed to make you blush, which was often. Heâd find any excuse to compliment you- how strong you were, how beautiful your smile was, how lovely your hair looked in the sunlight. It was playful at first, but then came the moments when his teasing turned quiet, almost tender, like when he brushed dirt off your cheek or tucked a loose strand of hair behind your ear. His hands always hovered, careful but close enough to leave you wondering if heâd reach for you properly if you just gave him the smallest sign.
And Johnny? Johnny was a walking storm of affection. He wasnât shy about how much he adored you. From the way he complimented your cooking- âI swear, love, youâre a magician in that kitchenâ- to how he always seemed to find a reason to be near you, even when he wasnât working. Heâd lean against the doorframe, arms crossed and a crooked grin on his face as he watched you knead dough or arrange flowers in a vase. And then there were the touches- small, fleeting things, like his hand on the small of your back as he passed by or the way his fingers grazed yours when he handed you tools.
Youâd been blind to it at first, convincing yourself it was just gratitude for the work, for the meals, for the home youâd offered them. But as the days stretched into weeks and their gazes grew heavier, their presence closer, it became harder and harder to ignore the truth.
They admired you.
Not just as a caretaker or a friend, but as something more- something deeper.
It was there in the way Johnâs voice softened when he spoke to you, the way Simonâs posture shifted when anyone unfamiliar stepped onto the property, putting himself between you and whatever potential threat he saw. It was in the way Kyleâs jokes always seemed to circle back to how lovely you looked doing even the simplest things, and the way Johnnyâs laughter died in his throat whenever you smiled at him just a little too long.
And the realization left you flustered- unsure of what to do with the warmth that bloomed in your chest whenever they lingered too close or brushed against you without meaning to.
They all cared for you, and in a way that went far beyond just gratitude.
The knowledge sent your heart racing whenever one of them looked at you like that- like you were something precious, something worth protecting. Like you were worth staying for.
And maybe- just maybe- you were ready to let them.
#noona.writes#cod x reader#cod x you#cod#tf 141 x reader#tf 141 x you#tf 141#cod imagines#john price x reader#ghost x reader#simon ghost riley x reader#soap x reader#simon ghost riley x you#ghost x you#poly!141 x reader#gaz x reader#johnny soap mctavish x reader#poly 141 x you#poly 141 x reader#poly!141#poly 141#simon ghost riley imagines#johnny soap mctavish x you#soap x you#kyle gaz garrick x you#kyle gaz garrick x reader#gaz x you#john price x you
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oh my god
âSo here you are, standing in your nicest dress and balancing a stack of gifts you hope will amount to something, never enough but something, to repay the people who you feel have loved you more than you deserve. It's all you really have. You do your best, and yet you know when that door opens, it'll all be washed away in a high-tide flurry of hugs and laughter and the familiar press of Bobpul's wet nose against your leg. They're just those kinds of people-they would be just as happy if you didn't bring anything at all, and somehow that makes you feel even more guilty.â
i donât evenJDJSJD i donât even have the WORDS to describe the feelings that this paragraph made me feel. almost gut wrenching bc i completely understand what ocâs feeling? absolute perfection.
âThen you think of the pockmarked farmland beside your home, lacy with the fall harvest. Even now, you can trace the endless blue of the coastline all the way there, cut through all the maybes and just let the sound of the ocean fold you into sleep like you were a child again. You wonder if Seohyun, all the way on the other side of the world, ever misses it.â
need i say less, i think i found my new comfort (but hurt?) fic ever. the prose, the diction, the syntax?!?!? everything is sososo beautiful im absolutely gagged.
TO GROW LOVE (AND EAT IT TO THE CORE)
pairing: mingyu x gn!reader wc: 8.1k summary: your whole life, you've only wanted one thing. then you meet mingyu. suddenly you want too much, and you wish the summer never ended. notes: farmer!au, established relationship, angst/hurt/a little comfort
this is a birthday fic for my one and only cat @wuahae ! yes this is about half a year late but what can i say. all good things come with time. thank you for being so kind, funny, and thoughtful (and patient)! not a day goes by where iâm not thankful for our friendship :)
and a million thanks to hana @wqnwoos and jackie @97-liners for helping me with edits. literally you guys are insane writers and i will never stop looking up to you.
i. strawberries (the summer we were young)
When a strawberry is ripe, the seeds push out from the heart of the fruit, as if it's bursting from the inside out.
This is one of the few and only things you've learned by living in Seogwipo, where strawberry season comes like a supernova. The May sun, full and heavy, peels into summer, and the roadside farms open their doors, trying to catch stray vacationers from Jeju City on the other side of the island.
That being said, there are approximately two things to do here. One of them is farm. The other is pretend like you have a life, which is your childhood friend Yizhuo's favorite thing to do when she's back from university on summer break.
Today, this involved convincing her ritzy, too-good Seoul friends that they're missing out on this side of Jeju. (Missing out on what? You're not sure. Perhaps the chipped paint of the mural walls, or the endless flat-topped stretches of seagrass. Yizhuo isn't fooling anyone, but you've always liked stretching your legs out in the bed of her pick-up, even on the long drive to nowhere.)
Unsurprisingly, her friends quickly came to the same conclusion. Just one look at your local strawberry patch, with none of the glamour of the bloated tourist traps in the city, and they decided they'd rather spend the afternoon at the beach.
It was then, between the fragaria blooms, when you met Mingyu. He asked for your name, and the rest was history. Yizhuo and co. scattered like the grasping hands of an overripe dandelion and you learned that he was, one, the newly-graduated son of a pair of local farmers, and two, very, very attractive. Almost too much so, especially for a place like this.
Now he holds up a berry, a bright red murder between his fingers, and tells you to try it.
"You must be delusional if you think i'm taking food from a stranger," you laugh, perched on the fence bordering the field. It sprawls before you, melon stripes on the sunbaked ground.
"No, my name is Mingyu," he replies. "No idea who delusional is." His smile, all bright lip and snaggletooth, tears into the scarlet belly of a newly picked strawberry.
"We all know what happened to Persephone."
"Well, if the underworld was a strawberry patch, I wouldn't mind being stuck there for all of eternity."
"What're you picking all these for, anyway?" you ask, watching Mingyu struggle with his too-big straw hat between the vines. His woven basket bleeds over with little berries.
"Jam. I make it on the very first day of every summer."
"Why?"
"You ask a lot of questions for someone who trespassed on my farm. You're cute, but I won't let you off easy."
He laughs at how you balk, clearly red-handed. You're not sure how to tell him you don't think you were supposed to be here either. You don't do things like sit in the back of trucks, trespass, or talk to pretty farmer boys who take a fancy to you, but it's the summer before you graduate and you're not even sure how long you'll have to continue making bad decisions.
"Are you gonna take my first-born now?" you joke instead. The daylight runs down the rim of Mingyu's hat, trickles down his brow, and you wish you could pour the image of him into a jar and keep it forever.
"No, but I will invite you in for some fresh jam on toast. I baked a loaf this morning." and when you say nothing, he continues. "The strawberries are only good once a year. It's the best you'll ever have. Promise."
It's a whine and a half, and somehow you convince yourself this will be the last bad decision you'll make. You've been here long enough to know that good things don't come twice in Seogwipo, and he is unlikely to be an exception.
Yizhuo blows up your phone, you tie the gingham apron around Mingyu's tiny waist, and the basket turns to blood in the saucepan.
Mingyu is right. Love comes to you in that kitchen, high and red like the sun, and the jam never tastes as good as it does that summer.
ii. watermelon (hollowed out, like a magic trick)
"A good watermelon sounds like a heartbeat."
You watch Mingyu heave the fruit, small and striped, out of his grocery bag. It joins the array of egg sandwiches and banana milks you picked up from the store together earlier. (There should have been chocolate Pepero too, but you split the box on the walk).
You're on a picnic, sprawled out on the outcropping overlooking the water. The path up is basically right behind your house, but you had never cared to visit. It had always been the local makeout spot, a schlocky teen crawl for those with nothing better to do, and yet, with Mingyu stretched out beside you, it seems newer. More exciting.
You're still just friends, or at least that's what you told Yizhuo. But ever since you sat on Mingyu's kitchen counter and ate from his jam-covered spatula, you don't think you've gone a week without seeing him. It's been almost two months, which seems so long and yet not long enoughâhe makes it easy to be greedy.
"See?" He thumps the watermelon with the heel of his palm. "Try it."
You already went through this entire charade at the grocery store, right in front of all the local aunties, but you indulge him. There's little point to triple checking if it's still ripe, but you think he just likes hitting it.
"It sounds good," you say. "But how are we even gonna eat it? We don't have a knife."
"Watch this." Mingyu procures a coin from his pocket. "You didn't learn this in elementary school? I feel like everyone was doing it."
"Here?" you ask, incredulous.
"Yeah, here. I grew up here too, you know."
He holds the edge of the coin to the skin and slams his palm into it once more, so that it lodges itself into the rind, and begins dragging it around the fruit. You start to wonder if he bought the watermelon just to show you a party trickânot that you mind, though. The strain of his biceps peeks through his rolled up white tee, and you remember why he was able to stop you with just one look back when you first met.
"No way." The watermelon is so ripe, it bleeds around the incision. "I feel like I know everyone here. And I definitely would have remembered you."
"I was probably, like, two grades above you," he replies. "And my parents shipped me off to live with my cousins after elementary school. They said I should get out of Seogwipo and experience the real world."
"Good call. There's nothing here." You watch Mingyu spin the melon over to cut through the other side. The coin catches the sunlight, and it looks like gold. "I wish I left for university. The one here is so small."
"Really?" He pauses to show you his handiwork. The two melon halves roll over on their backs, their cut edge cruel and jagged. "Cool, huh?"
"Impressive," you say. "Honestly. I really didn't think that would work."
"I didn't either when I first saw someone do it. But Iâll try anything once," he replies, ripping open the packaging of the plastic spoon from the bag. "I can't believe you don't like it here."
"You do?"
"Yeah. A lot." He shoves the spoon in his mouth, and you watch the watermelon juice pool around his lips. "I missed home. The trees and the tall grass and the ocean. All the fruits. Everything. I learned to ride a bike, right down there by the water."
"Hm." He passes you the spoon. You don't want to hog it, so you carve out a piece bigger than you need. "Are you gonna work at the farm?"
"Maybe. Haven't decided yet," he says. "I think I want to be here, though. Maybe do something with food, but I want to be home."
"That's funny, because I think Iâve always wanted to live a different life. Or at least one somewhere else."
"You want to go to law school, right?"
"Yeah." Mingyu is right. The watermelon is all sugar, and you would almost feel guilty for eating it if it wasn't technically good for you. "Iâve always wanted to be a lawyer. It's something about the people watching, I think."
"Thatâs really cool," Mingyu says, mouth full but no less sincere. It's then that you notice your shoulders are almost touching, and your heart crawls back up to your mouth. "You know what you want. I admire that."
He makes it sound like a compliment, but you're sure it's a curse.
You think of your parents. There's a permanent wrinkle ironed into their foreheads, the paper crease of expectations and high standards. It's not that they didn't care, but their kind of care was a humbled sort, made heavy by a hard life. It didn't help that your big sister Seohyun went straight from Yonsei to work a big tech job in San Francisco and never once looked back.
But you can't blame any of themâwanting has always been a hereditary failing. Sometimes Yizhuo will catch you frowning at nothing, and then you remember that life isn't a performance and every day ends at the same time no matter how hard you work. But you don't know how to tell her that the only thing you can do sometimes is want, because otherwise you wouldn't really have much at all.
It seems like the exact opposite of how Mingyu livesâeverything about him seems to pass like the seasons. Maybe that's why you can't seem to get enough of each other.
"Thank you. Really." You dig the spoon into your half of the melon. There isn't much left. "You're way too nice to me."
"Itâs not hard to be," he laughs. "Maybe you're just too hard on yourself."
You're losing track of the distance between the two of you. You can almost feel the heat playing off his skin.
"Maybe."
It's then, under the veil of summer, where you meet Mingyu's gaze and, finally, things seem close to simple.
All you know are his eyes, heavy with sun, and then the slow, slow move of his lips against yours. He tastes like August, long and sweet, and for once you know what it's like to not only want, but to have, and to have again.
The ocean sings on the horizon, and the watermelon bellies weep.
iii. adzuki beans (or, the blood of a headless taiyaki)
Mingyu eats taiyaki headfirst because he says it hurts less.
"That makes no sense," you tell him, your pinkies linked. You never really liked holding hands, but yours fits so perfectly in Mingyu's and there's some girlish, childlike shine to it when you watch his finger search for yours after just a moment separated.
"What do you mean."
He breaks your gaze to eye a red bean taiyaki, like an unwilling predator sizing up their prey. It's the lamest, most embarrassing iteration of National Geographic you've ever seen, and yet you cannot find any fiber within yourself not deeply in love with the lion.
Fall is a forgiving place for your relationship to settle. You're now a senior at university and he's started his gap year. Gap implies he's in the middle of something, but in true Mingyu fashion, he leaves it up to fate, or chance, or something not nearly as kind (whim).
"Taiyaki isn't alive. And why would you want to pretend it is? Eating gummy bears would become an extinction event."
"It kind of is." He holds out the tail end of the taiyaki, the pastry almost explicitly flayed open, in front of you to eat. "Why does the Haribo bear have a face? Why do the gummy bears live in a gummy forest?"
"Great, so now I canât even enjoy gummy bears without feeling like a serial killer?"
You dig your pointer into his shoulders, broad from all the time he spends on the farm. To think that his hands, big and weathered, were made to pick berries (and now wrap around your pinky finger) is bruising, if not ridiculously funny.
"It's a crime of passion. Gummy passion. Prosecute that."
He kisses your cheek and your heart almost squeezes into two.
The terrible thing about being with Mingyu is how seemingly endless his affection is. Now he's feeding you in public and buying the two of you matching socks (cat and dog, to be exact), although you'll admit it's a little charming, even if the neighbors do gossip.
He's sweet, too sweet, and his kisses stick to the back of your throat.
But you can't be fooled. There's an unsaid violence to the way Mingyu loves. (The meticulous spiral of the peel he carves when you ask for him to cut you an apple. The grind, decisive and cruel, of a knife against a cutting board. A pair of canines against your neck, your jaw.)
Even now, he bites the head off another unwitting taiyaki before stuffing it back in the bag.
"We're still splitsing, right?" he says, with perhaps 1% of his mouth available for speaking and the other 99% murder machine.
Splits, he always says before you share food. You never had the heart to tell him that it's in the same family as mines or sharesies or takebacksâsilly childhood relics, ones that no one uses anymore because they don't mean anything.
This time, you don't hear him because you're thinking about the law school fair you went to before Mingyu picked you up. The future is so close, it scares you. A year from now, what ground would you be standing on? Would it smell like thisâthe peat, the thread-spool fields, the balm of the ocean? Would you still have Mingyu's finger wrapped round yours?
"Have you decided if you're staying at the farm?" you ask.
"Not really." He uses the back of his hand to wipe off his chin. "If my sister decides to take over, Iâm actually kinda thinking of going to pastry school instead of getting a masters."
Mingyu had been toying with the idea for some time after you had talked about it on the outlook. It started off as a joke (September; a galette), then a what if (October; green tea mochi), and now it sits at a kinda.
"Kinda?"
The word gathers speed in the pachinko machine of your mind. You never liked being a kinda person. For Mingyu, it seems like a luxury of a word, but for you, it's really just another thing to hide behind. Kinda talented, kinda ambitious, kinda just there. You're always one foot in, one foot out of something better.
"Yeah, kinda. Why?"
"I dunno. What if we both end up leaving?"
"Maybe. You still want to, right?"
You would be lying if you said you didn'tâit's what you always wanted. Seogwipo has been a sun-rot, too-small crutch for you, but you would also be lying if you said you weren't terrified that you'd eventually come back, limping like some doomed Icarus, unable to truly make it in the real world.
Then you think of the pockmarked farmland beside your home, lacy with the fall harvest. Even now, you can trace the endless blue of the coastline all the way there, cut through all the maybes and just let the sound of the ocean fold you into sleep like you were a child again. You wonder if Seohyun, all the way on the other side of the world, ever misses it.
"Iâm not sure," you say, because, as much as you don't like it, it's the only answer you have.
"It's ok. You'll figure it out. You always do." He squeezes your cheeks together between his thumb and index, laughing at how they pillow out underneath his fingers. "Screw pastry school. I could come with you. Who else would keep you fed?"
Mingyu's complete and unfounded belief in you makes you feel something close to betrayal. How could he say any of that? With what proof? Only someone like Mingyu would be able to hold the wrinkled fruit of your unremarkable life between his palms and see something better than that. Maybe it's because he grew up on a farm. Either that, or he already cares for you too much, too painfully.
Secrets are easy to keep when they look like yours. At least here, in the pit of your stomach, you can keep count, take attendance of them, all your tittering, small anxieties. Some days it feels like your ribs are pressing out, but it's better than cutting everything loose to spill out over what little you do have control over.
You can handle a little pressure. You have to.
What concerns you is the hand Mingyu's got across your chest. With one look, he just might gut you. A twist of the heart-knife, and all those carefully wound insides carved out in an instantâmaybe he'd pity you, but worse than that, he'd likely be disappointed.
For you, expectation has always stood taller than shame, and the idea that he sees something past you makes you want to run away.
"I could be a house husband," he says as easily as ever. "You'll be off saving the world, arguing with whoever, and I'll be there to run you a bath afterwards."
"Let's not get too ahead of ourselves," you reply, binding up the strange, hollow feeling in your stomach with a laugh.
There's a scared little girl hiding inside you, and whether Mingyu sees her or not hurts the same. A spade is a spade. You can only pretend so long.
You look at the taiyaki floating in their wax paper bag, blinded and wrought open by the same grin that now peels you down, and you're not hungry anymore.
iv. winter pears (rotten, outside your parents' house)
Mingyu's family loves Christmas.
You think it's because of the pear trees they have in the front yard. They stand bravely before the house, all emerald ash and wisdom in the December freeze. Run your palms over the knobs and it's like you can see into a sleepy visage of simpler days past. (Below its heart, carved: 1982, the year the farm was bought. Along the tangle of the roots: gyu waz here, in an unsure, childish scrawl.) Â
Winter comes to the countryside crawling on its hands and knees. On days it doesn't snow, there's a mist, boggy and clingy. You've come to realize the cold is more of a threat than a promise, and so the pear trees still bear fruit; the silvery branches hang heavy, faithful.
The first day of December, Mingyu's parents had tasked the two of you with decorating the farmhouse, a duty you took very seriously. You wrapped Mingyu up in string lights and watched him blink in and out like your own personal firefly.
It wasn't until you watched the rafters, the barn doors, the joyous vault of the ceiling all glow, like a spectacular firework, that you finally started to understand why Mingyu was so into the holidays.
It was in the yellow blush of the string lights that you had your first pear from the tree, which Mingyu insisted was a holiday tradition. We make poached pears, he said, mid-bite. You simmer the pear in syrup until it gets so soft, you can cut into it with a fork. Just like butter.
That same night, he kissed you, mouth hot and trembling and tasting of honey, and pressed you against the bark so hard, you could feel the grit of its veins against your skin.
You think December became your favorite month, and pears your favorite fruit.
So much so, that for the entire month, you try to put away your worries about law school applications to celebrate with Mingyu and his family.
You learn his mom makes the best hot chocolate (a cinnamon stick and a dogged devotion to the whisk), and that Mingyu has no clue on God's green earth how to ice skate. (He careens right into your chest the first time. You spend the next hour with him attached to you like a backpackâhe manages to find the most impractical ways to do anything, which you somehow admire the most). On Sundays, Yizhuo ditches her Seoul friends and instead accompanies you to the mall two towns over, where she watches you compare different ties and watches and collagen creams as you decide on gifts for his family. (Lilac is so last year, she'd say, stirring the straw of a watered-down milk tea.)
It's not until the weekend before Christmas when you realize just how serious things have gotten. Your feet understand the meander of the dirt path to the farmhouse, your bones the scent of the yellow-skinned apple, the faded wildflowers. Your palms crave the plush of the rug they have in front of the fireplace. Hell, you can't even eat soondubu without thinking of the kind Mingyu's dad makes, with extra anchovies and green onion.
You don't think about what this means. There are ten days left in December and love poured from a full cup never seems to run out.
"Please let me carry some of those," Mingyu wheedles. "Oh my god. I'm like the worst boyfriend in the world."
"No, you are not." you make your way up to his doorstep, taking care to one-two step over the stray roots of one of the pear trees. It's second nature to you by now. "The moment I hand you a box, you are gonna start trying to figure out what it is."
He harumphs and plucks the big one off the top anyway, the one he knows you can't reach. "I didn't even know you were getting us gifts. You didn't have to."
"It's the least I could do. Who shows up to a holiday dinner emptyhanded?" You stop at the front door. "And stop shaking it," you laugh, using the tip of your boot to nudge his shin.
"Okay. Okay," he says, saccharine, adoring, before grabbing the doorknob. "Ready? Are you nervous? You shouldn't be nervous, right? It's not fancy or anything, if you were worried about that."
And that's the thing that wedges itself between your ribs. Mingyu and his whole family are like this. They love and worry and love again; it presses deep into you, fills you, and overflows.
So here you are, standing in your nicest dress and balancing a stack of gifts you hope will amount to something, never enough but something, to repay the people who you feel have loved you more than you deserve. It's all you really have. You do your best, and yet you know when that door opens, it'll all be washed away in a high-tide flurry of hugs and laughter and the familiar press of Bobpul's wet nose against your leg. They're just those kinds of peopleâthey would be just as happy if you didn't bring anything at all, and somehow that makes you feel even more guilty.
"No, no," you wave him off. "Iâm fine. Excited."
When Mingyu opens the door, everything goes just as you expected. His sister takes your coat, your gifts are whisked away to the tree (Aji has already figured out which one is his), and his parents descend upon you in a choking swell of warmth and charity.
We baked some fresh bread for your parents (âThank you so much, but you really shouldn't have.). You look so beautiful in that color (âNo, no, you flatter me too much.). Mingyu better be taking good care of you (âHe is. He really, really is.).
The kitchen is gauzy with cinnamon, anise. They must be making their famous poached pears, which Mingyu remarks on, just like clockwork.
Dinner passes the same way. It bubbles over with affection, and you feel swallowed by an impossible yearning. Thisâa full table and a hand to hold underneath itâdid you deserve this? And could you keep it?
For an instant, you picture yourself, years later, at this same seat. Mingyu would be fussing over the rice cakes, his apron still gingham because it reminds him of the day you two met. His parents, grayer but no less happy, bickering over the shade of tinsel on the tree. And the dogs, coiled at your feet like they are now. The vision laps at your bones like you're a raft in a storm.
You're pulled back into the moment when Mingyu squeezes your hand, grounding and insistent. "Mom asked how school was going. I told her I think you're basically the smartest person I know, and Iâm pretty sure you're getting into whatever law school you want."
Mingyu's parents laugh, and they cut through their pears.
"Oh, sorry," you say. "Um."
Clink. Knife meets flesh, meets porcelain. Your cheeks are hot. You wanted to talk about anything other than yourself tonight. Clink.
"The top programs are a reach, but it'd be nice." clink. "I just want to get in somewhere."
"Theyâre all so far away," Mingyu's mom remarks. "So grown up. Any school will be lucky to have you. You'll get into all of them."
Clink.
"Or maybe you can stay here." You watch the prongs of Mingyu's father's fork disappear into the pear. "Keep us old folk company."
"No, no, I think Mingyu should take notes and get off his lazy ass," his sister says, teasing. "Going back to the city will be good for him."
"So you can, what, burn down the kitchen again?" Mingyu grumbles, and the whole table seems to boil over with laughter.
"Weâre kidding," his mom tells you. "No matter where you go, Iâm sure you'll do great. We can even throw you a party at the end of the year. For graduating."
Clink. Clink.
There's a horrible uneasiness writhing around in your stomach. It's pear and syrup and clove and a blackness, an anxious, selfish one that sucks up all the generosity of the evening and turns it into shame.
Mingyu's mom is talking about throwing you a graduation party, something you didn't even think to do for yourself, and here you are, thinking about the shaking moment you open your rejection letters and the lonely path you'll draw on your way back home.
It's ok. They missed out, Mingyu would say, pouring you a consolation drink, and then it would be over. You'd go home and sit on your bed and the trifold piece of paper would go round and round your head like it was in a washing machine.
Your heart, an inventory of tasks and goals and tally marks. Things you've taken and things you've owed. It's a soft, boneless excuse. Be grateful. Give them that, at least.
Clink.
Dessert ends before you can tell his family not to get their hopes up. Mingyu's mom sends you off with your loaf of bread and a kiss on the cheek, and the moment is gone.
"Gyu," you call out on the steps in front of the house.
There are words at the seam of your lips. You want to tell him you're sorry for worrying so much. For making the whole dinner about you and then very possibly having nothing to show for it when it matters. For the heaviness in your chest. Your cowardice. But none of it comes out.
Instead you watch Mingyu pull at the leaves of a pear tree, watching the frost-filigree they get at the end of the season. He looks over his shoulder and smiles at you, as if he's on the hazy cover of a magazine. His eyes bend so wonderfully at the corners when he looks at you, and it breaks your heart.
"You had fun, right?" he asks. "My parents like you a lot, you know. I think they really do."
But that's the problem, you want to say. You all do, and I have no idea why.
Some of the pears are beginning to rot now. You watch one drop off the vine, and it caves to the pavement like it was made of nothing at all.
v. wild barley (grows like weeds)
In March, you play house.
Your parents leave on a two week trip to see relatives, and Mingyu takes it upon himself to make sure you survive.
It's a kind, blinding charade.
(7 am, breakfast. You usually don't even eat breakfast, but you wake up to doenjang and a smile, one that presses itself to yours until you're wearing it on the long walk to school.)
(4 pm, the stretch between lunch and dinner. You're muddling through another useless club meeting when Mingyu sends you a picture of him in your mom's apron, making kimchi. Kiss the chef, he texts you. You promise to, over and over and over.)
It's good until it isn't.
That isn't to say that it's Mingyu's fault. In fact, it's never really Mingyu's fault, and that's the worst thing about your relationship. Sometimes you wish he was worse just so there was someone else to blame.
(1 am, a fridge-cold glass of water and a hand on the column of your spine. Can't sleep? He asks. Just had a weird dream, you say.
It's a lie. You're a liar.
You miss your parents and the first wave of acceptance letters comes out in two days. You're not like him. Sleep has never been a cure for the exhaustion you're feeling, and you have no way of telling him that however warm the bed is won't fix that.)
It's on a Thursday afternoon when you open your mailbox and see the tiny, thin envelope that you've been expecting for the past week. You don't need to open it to know what it says, and yet you do it anyway.
The sun is white, a ghost in the spring sky. The ocean bleeds into the overcast, the curly barley stands tall around your feet, and you let the worst letter you've gotten in your life fall upon your shoulders, word by terrible word.
Then you close it, pinching the seam shut, and draw up your brave face. Nothing left to do but be brave. You're convinced you've used up all the sadness in your relationshipâspend in pennies and the well still runs dry. Mingyu will cup your cheek and call you darling, pouring into your emptying basin, holey and broken.
You see him now through the kitchen window, Venus in his clamshell of a kitchen. Galbijjim day, he had said this morning. Now, he waves at you, glittery with recognition.
Your throat feels like crumpled paper.
Mingyu smiles at you, hazy through the glass. Your cheeks hurt and your mouth is paper mache, but you smile back anyway.
///
The letters come one after another.
You know what the envelopes hold and yet you keep opening them. The little folder you keep stashed in your bottom drawer gets fatter every passing day because you can't help but revisit your misery, almost as if you need to remind yourself it exists.
Mingyu is none the wiser. Today he decides he'll put off pastry school for one more year. "It doesn't feel like the right time," he says, rolling a log of burdock kimbap up. "You know what I mean?"
No, you don't. You never really do.
You do know, however, that it would feel really fucking bad that, come the end of the year, to have nothing. All your friends would be going somewhereâeven Yizhuo opened her acceptance to an MFA program in Shanghai yesterdayâand you would be here, still, feet firmly planted in the muddy Jeju dirt like they always had been.
"Hey, don't look so disappointed." he jokes. "Don't tell me you're already trying to get rid of me."
You're not, you really aren't. But part of you wonders if it's just a race to the bottom. If you got rid of him before he decided he wanted to get rid of you, maybe it would hurt a lot less. One less letter for the folder.
"Never. But imagine if you picked up a French accent at pastry school. Then Iâd consider it. Maybe."
You watch his knife rock back and forth on the cutting board as he cuts the kimbap.
"Some for you. And more for me," he says, in what you can only describe as someone attempting to speak French when they've never heard it before. "Unless you want more, mon cherie."
He brings the plates to the table, his grin nothing short of dizzying.
"Iâm irresistible, huh? Still wanna leave me now?"
"You're gonna have to try a little harder than that, I think."
The words roll off your tongue, easily, traitorously.
You watch the kimbap disappear off of Mingyu's plate.
Going, going, gone.
///
Seogwipo is always dark at night, only kept alive by the glow of the moonlit sea.
You can't sleep. Again. And so you sit out on the steps in front of your house, letting the twilight wrap around you like a blanket.
You got your last letter back earlier today. You held your breath and tore it open like you would a birthday card with money in it.
Waitlisted.
It was surely better than a rejection, but some naive, child-eyed part of you thought that if you had just closed your eyes and hoped hard enough, things would work out the way you had planned. Tragically, it wasn't enough this time. You wanted and wanted and you thought maybe that would mean you'd come close to deserving it.
Your parents called today. After managing to sideline the issue of basically the rest of your entire life, they had finally cut through your sad little charade. No good news yet, huh?
No, butâ
It was always like that with you. No, but it's not as bad as you think. No, but give me a chance. No, but Iâm trying. I've been trying.
You wish things didn't come out of you so complicated. That you could be like Seohyun, who could go through school with her eyes closed and still graduate at the top of her class. Instead, you parade around your little failures, trying to convince people it all could mean something only if they squinted. See? It isn't so bad.
You think you're past the point of crying about it. Your stomach hurts, you're cold, and most of all, you just want to go back to bed. Plus, although Mingyu sleeps like a log, you think he's developed a sixth sense for whenever you get up too early.
Time to be brave, you've been telling yourself, although you don't know who you're pretending for anymore.
So you nudge the front door openâit's so old, it wails if you come at it with any more forceâand, to your surprise, see the light above the kitchen sink turned on.
It's not very bright, but it's enough to make out Mingyu's broad silhouette, back turned to you as he makes a cup of tea. He's humming one of his made-up songs.
"Mingyu?"
"There you are," he says, turning around. "Just came out to check on you. And make you some tea."
The kettle whizzes. Your gut twists.
You still haven't said anything to Mingyu. To manage your own disappointment was one thingâyou don't think you could handle another person's. And yet when he stands there, Pororo mug between his huge hands, you feel as if you are holding a knife, big and guilty and bloody.
"I-I'm fine, Gyu. Honest." you watch his expression flicker, unreadable in the persimmon lamplight. "Sorry you had to come out. It's chilly out here."
"You know, you can tell me what's going on. I won't judge."
No, no, no. This is the last conversation you wanted to have, with the last person you wanted to have it with.
You feel feverish. You think your hands are shaking.
"Mingyu, I swearâ"
"Whatever it is, we can fix it. I know we can."
That almost makes you want to laugh if you didn't want to cry so bad. Of fucking course he would say that. Mingyu, who treats life like it's the watermelon trick he showed you on the outlook, wants to put a bandaid on this whole thing, as if that could come close to fixing it.
He'd tell you to curl up on the couch with a bad movie while he orders takeout. Kiss you on the top of the head. It's ok, baby. Just another bad day for the person who has the worst luck in the world. Another lump of problems for him to try and make better. If he isn't sick of you now, he sure would be soon enough.
"Itâs okay," you say, steeling your voice. "It really isn't a big deal. Let's just go back to sleep."
You try to walk away, but the hardness in Mingyu's eyes roots you down to the tile.
"Stop doing that."
"Doing what?"
"Pushing me away," he swallows. "Like you always do. I know something's going on."
"Iâm not, i justâ"
"You just what? You can't help it?"
"No, Iâ"
"Because you like to know that you can? That you can say whatever and then watch me come back?" A fragmented, heavy silence thrums between you. He's looking at you like he's daring you to say something, anything. His gaze is black. "What am I good for if you can't tell me anything?"
There's that familiar, stinging pressure behind your eyes. You think you're crying, but you're not sure. Maybe you've been crying this whole time.
"Fine," you bite. Your blood feels like hot metal. "You really wanna know? I didn't get into law school. There. Happy now?"
Mingyu looks stung.
"W-why didn't you tell me?"
Because I thought you would stop loving me. I thought you would have finally had enough.
"Because it's not all about you, Mingyu."
The words, selfish and damning, burn your tongue. Mingyu is right. This is what you always do. You fuck up and then make everyone else hurt for it.
"I'm sorry," Mingyu says. His voice doesn't sound like his. Instead, the words seem to hang in the air, trembling and holding their breath, waiting for an apology you can't give yet. "I shouldn't haveâ"
"It's ok." You swallow hard, and it hurts. "Let's just go back to bed."
It's getting colder and colder. You think there's a little hole in your sock, right above the cat's whiskers.
Mingyu doesn't reach for you as he passes to get to the hallway. Maybe he doesn't know how to anymore.
The Pororo cup is left abandoned on the counter. You walk over and read the label on the tea bagâbarley, because you have class tomorrow morning.
You pick it up, let the ceramic buzz between your hands with whatever warmth it has left, and hold it to your lips.
It's cold now, but all you can think to do is drink it. Erase all the evidence that tonight ever happened, and maybe it'll be nothing more than a bad dream in the morning.
There's honey at the bottom of the cup. It sears the back of your throat, but you drink until there's nothing left.
vi. the peach blossoms (without fail, bloom every August. I miss you.)
You broke up the next day.
Even now, you remember what happened. You had woken up early that morning to make your own breakfast because you couldn't allow Mingyu to give you any more of himself. Your hands could only hold, shatter, so much.
"Mingyu, I think we should...." You looked at the zigzags of jam on your toast, angry and uneven. "I think we should stop seeing each other. For now," you had added, as if that made anything better at all.
Somehow that seemed more merciful at the time. Really, you think it just showed your cowardice. If you were going to break his heart, you might as well have gone all the way the first time.
Maybe it was a good thing that Mingyu saw right through you. He always did.
"So that's it, huh? You're just gonna give up on us?"
"No, i just...need some time."
"How long?" he asked. "Be honest with me. Because you know Iâll wait."
"I don't know." You couldn't meet his gaze. His eyes reached and reached over that kitchen table and you denied him even that.
"Don't you always know?" he asked, pitifully, desperately. "Don't you want this to work?"
And you did. In fact, you don't think you had ever wanted anything more, and it was that that scared you. You had already lost law schoolâyou couldn't let the only other thing in your life let you go. So you pulled the trigger first.
"We should just end things. I'm sorry. I can't give you what you need."
He packed his bag within the hour, and you think everything, from then on, froze inside you. You didn't move from your seat until your parents came home from the airport later that day and asked why there were two plates of toast still on the table.
You think you knew, someplace, inevitably, this would happen. You, who only knew hunger, had reached deep inside Mingyu and rooted out a love you didn't think you were worthy of having. And yet you still ate from the vine, bite after guilty bite, until you couldn't take any more. The only time he asked you for anything at all, you couldn't give it to himâsuch was the irony of your relationship.
Maybe you were doomed the moment the first strawberry hit your tongue, just like you had said, all that time ago.
About a month later, you got another letter in the mail. Chungnam National University Law School, it read. This one was fat, in one of those brown envelopes lined with bubble wrap. Somehow, miraculously, that position on the waitlist had turned into an acceptance. You held the package to your chest and cried, loud and with abandon, as if taking a deep breath after almost drowning.
Ironically, the first person you wanted to tell was Mingyu. But the good news you needed to save your relationship came too little, too late. Perhaps that meant it had no legs to stand on in the first place, but that didn't stop you from missing it. Instead, you told Yizhuo, and she drove you to Jeju City and treated you to dinner. "You should just call him," she had said. "Hey, don't look at me like that. He'd probably pick up on the first ring."
The city is swathed in August's crimson summerâpeach season. The narrow streets are lined with peach trees, the fruits glowing like fat drops of sunlight. All you do these days is plan for your eventual move to Daejeon and the start of a life that seems newer and shinier than your own. But surrounded by the cicada song, the velvet treeline, the rain-soaked asphalt, somehow you think you're going to miss Seogwipo more than you think.
(Fickle, fickle heart. You always needed things to be taken away to really be able to appreciate them. Somehow, all that wanting had boiled down to something more satisfying, more filling.)
You wonder how Mingyu is. Now that you think about it, he seems just as much a part of Seogwipo as the farm he lives on. It was only last summer when you had first met him in the field, set on fire by the strawberry harvest. You think about him now, peddling around that ridiculous wicker basket to make jam. Maybe talking to another pretty girl, someone as naive, cruel as you had been.
Not long ago, you considered calling him to apologize, but that'd just be another thing to be selfish about. A little time and some warm weather, and Iâm calling to finally wash my hands of you. That's what it would sound like, no matter what you said. Still, it didn't stop you from thinking of him, every flower, every season.
"You know, I always wanted to grow peach trees. But I think we've always been a pear kind of family."
Mingyu. If a voice could cut through air, it'd be his.
You whip around, half-believing you're hearing things. Certainly that would be easier, but you're learning that there are some things you can't run from.
And like a picture, Mingyu stands tall, golden, framed by the peach blossoms. Not a thing about him has changed. Not even the way he looks at you.
"Mingyu," you breathe. Unfortunately, none of the times you replayed your last conversation with him help you come up with something to say, because in none of them did you anticipate him coming back. "W-what are you doing here?"
"I live here, silly."
"No way," you reply, scrambling. "Crazy, because I live here too."
You both laugh nervously, a silly, bubbly thing, but you feel like you're going to throw up. It's only now that you realize you're kind of on the walk to his place. Seogwipo has never had places to hide.
"I...um." you try and disentangle the guilt from the nostalgia from the scent of the peaches and the warmth on his face. They all look the same. You missed him. "I got into law school. In Daejeon."
"I heard," he says. "Not surprised at all. I always knew you would."
"Thank you. I mean it." The cicadas buzz around you, as if they know they have an important silence to fill. "You're staying in town, right?"
"Actually, I decided to apply to culinary school. It finally felt right, you know? I'm leaving at the end of the summer, but it's just in Jeju City. I couldn't leave the island."
"Thank goodness. I don't know if you could tell, but I kind of always hoped you would. I don't think Iâve ever eaten better food." Your voice wobbles, but it gets there. "You'll do amazing."
Then time stretches and forces you to recognize, reckon with, the moment you're in. You wonder if he feels the same way you doâbruised, overripe. If there's still a space in his heart for you.
Deep breath. Life only gives you so many chances.
"Mingyu, Iâm sorry. I'm sorry I couldn't make us work. You deserved better." Saying it feels like peeling the skin of your heart back. There's still a palpable distance between the two of youâyou think that had always been thereâbut it feels more comfortable in a way it never did before.
"Donât apologize," he says, easily, as he always does. Everything seems to flow off him like water, and you think that's the part of him you loved the most because it was the one thing you couldn't touch. "We loved each other. I think that much was true."
A jasmine breeze curls through the trees, sending the blossoms fluttering around you like ink in water. The very first time you met Mingyu, you thoughtthe image of him, haloed with the sunset, was the one you wanted to keep forever. And yet, somehow, you don't think you'll ever forget the way he looks right now.
"Will you ever come back to Seogwipo?" you ask.
"I was gonna ask you the same thingâyou were always the one who wanted to get out of here." He grins, ear to ear. "Of course I'm coming back. There's nowhere I'd rather be."
"Yeah. I think I know what you mean."
The sea, the clay dirt, Mingyu. Even yourself, clumsy and care-worn. You think, somewhere along the line, you forgot how to love. But you're learningâone step at a time.
"Friends," you say. "Let's be friends. If you'll let me."
"Thought you would never ask. Gladly. Always." The space between you seizes, like it's holding in a breath. Maybe one day, you'll think of closing it once more, but you like where you stand now. You can admire him better from a distance, without your fingerprints all over him. He stuffs his hands in his pockets, something he does before he gets ready to leave. But before he doesâ"I'll see you soon, okay? You better come back. Promise me."
For the first time, you see the honesty in his eyes and you really, truly believe him.
"Promise."
The Seogwipo sun is high and red in the sky when you wave Mingyu goodbye. It feels like you're coming to an end of a long summer, but you're not afraid. You watch the wind dance through the peach blossoms, their branches never searching, never wanting, and you finally feel as if you've arrived home.
#absolutely shell shocked#i literally stopped walking in the hallways in the rain to read this#(a few people mightâve cussed me out but itâs whatever bc this was SOO worth it)#this was actually so beautifully and well written like#i did double takes and triple takes#i rubbed my eyes to make sure what i was reading was right#THIS. is art#i canât believe this is being offered for free for the entire internet to read#op this is single handedly one of the most beautiful and intricate written works iâve ever read on this platform or ANY platform-#-for that matter#youâre so incredibly gifted oh my god#SORRY MY REVIEWS ARENT USUALLY THIS LONG BUT I JS HAD TO đ#kieâs fic recs!
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Ok a fic where reader and sylus are at a business meeting, she âoffersâ herself as payment (maybe as a joke or just to rile sylus idk) and he makes sure to remind her who she belongs to? Please???
Kindred Spirits
Word Count: 5.1k
Tags: sylus x fem!reader, possessiveness, ownership, spanking, hitting, slight blood mention, pet names like kitten & sweetie, creampie, rough sex, crying, slight fluff at the end :3
AN: Anon ur a literal genius. This has Sylus written all over it. Im so happy to be back posting another story for you all! Also happy to announce my masterlist is now complete and can be found in my pinned! Ty all! Enjoy and remember, my asks are open for any character, Sylus is just my husband LOL. Remember to read my pinned before requesting please! This is a bit tamer than my other stories but trust I am cooking up some deviant content as soon as I publish this one :33
âFinallyâŚâ
You nearly collapse near your front door. A whole week of your life. Gone. To what you ask? Dealing with wanderers on a special aid mission. Sure sure, the job paid well but it had been weeks since your last off day. Every time it seemed like one was around the corner here they go with some emergency call and a spill about how some rich politician needed help or something.
You were starting to get tired of cleaning up other peopleâs mistakes.
You fumbled with your keys, fingers numb from the biting cold. The wind whipped around you, making you shiver as you tried to fit the right key into the lock. Your breath came out in visible puffs, and you could feel the frustration building with each failed attempt. Finally, with a relieved sigh, you heard the click of the lock turning.
The still warm air is such a welcoming contrast to the wind and biting cold outside. You quickly shut your door and melt to the floor, your feet aching with relief as the pressure you had been putting on them subsided. Peace at last. Time for a hot shower an-
Your peace was cut short with the distinct tone of your phone ringing. And not just any ring tone. The one you had set specifically for a certain white haired man that only ever brought trouble. Wondering if you should even pick up, you bring the phone to your face, knowing that you were going to answer regardless.
âSylusâŚIâm really tired. Can we talk lat-"
âLong time no see kitten. You should stop by for a bit, hm?â
You roll your eyes, suppressing the urge to scoff out loud. Arrogant prick, you think, irritated by his inability to let you finish a sentence without interrupting. How did he even know you were home now?
You sigh deeply, feeling the tension building, and rub your temples to alleviate the mounting frustration. No, you tell yourself firmly. You wouldnât put up with this today. Maybe another day, but definitely not today.
"Actually, no. I just returned from a week-long aid mission. Not today," you say firmly, aiming to be clear and resolute in your decision to stay put. Sylus however, seems to sense the cracks in your resolve and only responds with a chuckle.
âI want to see you. Iâll have Luke and Kieran come get you since youâre so tiredâ.
âHu-â
âSee you soon. Theyâre en route. Ciaoâ
The phone clicks, signaling the end of the call. For whatever reason, your ever growing frustration simply dissipates, defeat taking its place. You should be used to this by now. Sylus always gets what he wants. And you always let him. It goes without saying that itâs the same way for you as well. At least, Sylus always gives you what you want if it doesnât interfere with his need to lay his eyes on you at least once in awhile. He knew that you wouldnât push this though. You both knew.
Deep down, you wanted to see him too.
You asked Luke and Kieran to wait outside for a bit while you took a brisk shower and freshened up. Those two had always been very patient and understanding. You felt bad âbossingâ them around, and yet they always insisted that you could. Though Luke had admitted on one occasion that he never expected to be helping a girl find hair ties or carrying shopping bags while working for Onychinus.
The statement had made you laugh a bit. You finally finish dressing in some plain sweats and rush to the car. Luke and Kieran are waiting outside of a dark colored jeep. Not too flashy as to not draw attention, but it was still clearly very expensive.
âActually miss, Boss wanted you to wear theseâ Luke says, holding out an expensive looking dress. Clearly designed by hand and tailored to your measurements. Kieran follows his lead, holding out a box containing a pair of earrings and a lavish looking necklace.
âHuh? Whatâs this for? A date?â
âBusiness. Thatâs all he saidâ Kieran chimed in. Although you couldnât see their faces, you knew they had no reason to lie to you about this.
âAh. Dragging me into more trouble. Got itâ.
When the three of you finally arrived to the location, the sun had already set for the day. You darted your eyes back and forth, squinting above at the bright neon sign of the establishment.
âWeâre not going to the N109 Zone? This is a nightclubâŚâ you mutter, taken aback by the unfamiliar surroundings. When did this even get here? There were plenty of clubs in Linkon of course, but you never seemed to notice this one. Not that you knew much about the night life to begin with. People were lined up at the entrance, chatting, fixing makeup, or texting.
âBoss wants you here. Heâs waiting inside. Enjoy your time missâ Luke said, amusement written all over his tone. He gets out of the passenger seat to open the door and lend you a hand. You rolled your eyes, not wanting to appear shaken up by the situation. Sylus was always full of surprises. This was no different, act confident.
At least, thatâs what you tried to tell yourself. After getting almost immediate entrance into the club with just a simple nod from the guard, you enter. As you walk inside the club, Luke and Kieran not far behind you, you can tell this was no ordinary night club. Everyone here was dressed lavishly and sharp, clearly possessing power and ulterior motives. A few eyes lay on you as you walk in, and you feel your hands start to sweat.
Keep cool. This isnât the first time youâve been around high ranking individuals. This is probably some test he set upâŚright? Or some kind of joke to get a laugh?
Clenching your fists, your eyes dart and search for a tall figure with white hair, feeling more nervous by the second that you donât see him. Youâre about to turn around and ask one of the twins, but at last your gaze settles on him, sipping on a glass of Gin Fizz. Heâs sitting in a velvety booth by himself, people watching. Heâs wearing his black button up with red streaks across it, coat hanging on his shoulders per usual. As if he felt you staring, his eyes shift to meet yours. He sets down his glass, giving you you a small smirk. His eyes narrow, sending a very clear message.
Come here.
As if you were suddenly possessed, your feet seem to start moving on their own. You werenât sure if you were relieved to see him or if it was just the relief of seeing a familiar face in an unfamiliar place. You take a few deep breaths as you approach, readying your witful replies to any of his attempts to make fun of you. Without making any sound or looking at him, you quietly slide in next to him.
âYou look nice. Seems I was right about this look on youâ Sylus says, taking another sip of his drink. His eyes wander up and down behind the glass, seemingly devouring you. You squirm under his gaze.
âHm. Thanks. This gift is the least you can do after dragging me to do whatever you want on a whim once againâ you scoff, eyeing the full glass that sits on the table. Itâs another glass of Gin Fizz, probably for Sylus. Thereâs three other very empty glasses on the table.
This man can definitely hold his alcohol.
He chuckles, taking a finger and pushing the glass of Gin closer to you.
âDonât be like that sweetie. Loosen up a bit, youâll need itâ
âFor what exactly? Business?â you mock, picking up the Gin. You didnât exactly like the taste of this particular alcohol of choice but Sylus was right about one thing. Some liquid courage was definitely needed for whatever shenanigans he was dragging you into tonight.
âYeah. Figured I could use Linkonâs darling Miss Hunter as backupâ Sylus chuckles, watching you nearly choke as you take three big gulps of the drink. You squeeze your eyes in disgust as you finish the rest of the glass, shooting a death glare in his direction as you set it down.
âYouâre perfectly capable. Donât mock me Sylusâ. You grit your teeth in irritation, almost ready to rip him to shreds with your words. Clearly your tone has no effect on him though, as all you get in return is a soft smile. Sylus places a hand on your upper leg, slowing sliding his fingers under your dress. You gasp, the coldness of his fingers making you twitch a bit. The warmness of your skin mixed with his cold touch makes the sensation feel like icy fire.
âOr what? Youâll use this on me?â he smirks, tugging on the concealed gun strapped under your dress. âIâm all for it honestlyâ
You slap his hand away, the woozy feeling from the Gin Fizz starting to kick in. What was in this drink? It was strong. Too strong.
âPervert. Always touching me, making fun of me. Maybe I will shoot you. Again.â you growl, turning your head away from him. You attempt to scoot away as well, but are met with a strong grip around your waist as youâre pulled into closer proximity with him. Sylus grabs your chin and lifts it towards his face. He leans down a bit, the smell of alcohol and his bourbon vanilla cologne making you feel even more dizzy.
âYou can put your claws away now kitten. Donât make me have to melt your little tantrum awayâ he coos, gently caressing your face with his thumb.
You stare at him, dumbfounded, desperately searching your sluggish brain for a comeback but finding yourself too flustered to form any words. The look in Sylusâs eyes shifts from a smug expression to a much softer, almost tender gaze, and you wonder what his next move will be. Your face starts to burn as you feel heat rising in your core, your heart pounding in your chest. Panic sets in as you consider the possibilities, your mind racing with the fear of what might come next.
Donât tell me heâs going toâŚ?!
"You're so...confusing" you mutter.
Youâre just about to try and squirm from his grip, when Luke and Kieran tap on the table, catching yalls attention.
âBoss man, Val says heâs ready for yaâ Luke says, nonchalantly ignoring the scene thatâs displayed in front of him. Sylus releases your face, his face going serious again. He gets up, reaching out a hand to help you out of the booth.
âTime for business, sweetieâ
Youâre guided by the twins and Sylus past the sweaty bodies on the dance floor to a somewhat hidden room located downstairs. The area the stairs led to was blocked off by a singular rope, clearly only meant for a select crowd.
In the room thereâs a long black table, cards and chips all over it. Thereâs a few prominent figures already seated, along with a few bodyguards standing near the door. Sylus pulls a seat out for you, before taking his own. You study the figure thatâs sitting at the head of the table as you sit. Heâs short, a bit chubby, dark hair, smoking a cigar. A scar sits angrily on his forehead and you wonder what kinda grudges led to such an injury. He notices you looking at him, and gives you a devilish grin. Some of his teeth are crooked or missing.
All that money and he can't fix his smile?
You shudder. Sylus looks over at you, and back to the man at the head of the table. Heâs reading you, clearly sensing your nervousness. He says nothing, simply reaching a hand over to rest on your thigh.
âWas starting to think you were going to keep me waiting Sylus. Seems you didnât run after allâ he laughs, wheezing a bit as he takes another puff of his cigar. You wrinkle your nose a bit as the potent smell hits your senses.
âI couldnât turn down a game of cards with my dear old friendâ Sylus says, irritation coating the last word. âLetâs keep things civil this time, hm Valentino?â
Valentino bursts into laughter, clearly amused. Despite his laughter, you couldnât ignore the murderous tension in the air. Something tells you this isnât any regular game of cards. You gulp, trying to force yourself to look at everyone at the table and smile.
âWell hello little lady. Sylus, you didnât tell me you kept such gorgeous companyâŚâ Val says, his eyes snaking all over your body. You feel Sylus squeeze your thigh, clearly irritated. He pulls out a coin from his coat pocket, seemingly trying to channel his frustrations into something else.
âYou know Iâm not really the type to share, Val. Sheâs all mine. Down to every single strand of hairâ. Sylus ends, catching the coin and shooting a glare in the manâs direction. It was plain, but conveyed a message very well.
You feel your palms start to sweat. Was he being serious right now?? You side eye him, trying to piece out whether or not this was some kind of facade youâre supposed to play into. Valentino clearly takes Sylusâs words as a challenge.
âIâll give you twenty million for her. Maybe fifty million if you make her give us a little strip show. What do ya say? She looks so soft. Probably makes cute noises tooâŚ~â he chuckles, likely enjoying the look of surprise that washes across your face.
Sylus remains quiet, his face unmoving, frozen in a pissed glare. You donât know if it was the alcohol you drank earlier, or if it was some inkling of an attempt to dissipate the tension, but you clear your throat and begin to speak.
âWell Sylus? You can share canât you? Itâs quite the generous offer Mr. Valentino. Iâm quite flattered actually.â you express, putting on your best smug look. Sylus stiffens, a somewhat shocked expression washing over him. Valentino erupts into yet another fit of laughter, seemingly unable to contain himself. Turning to look back at Sylus, you see it in his face briefly. An uncaged look of rage before it quickly dissipates.
Shit. Shouldnât have said that.
Far too late to stop now though.
âYou heard the lady Sylus. Why donât you try sharing just this once? What I would give to taste that sweet little body of he-â
Sylus slams a revolver on the table, then calmly starts picking up cards from the deck.
"I'd suggest you stop talking and start playing the game, Mr. Valentino," Sylus snarls, his words dripping with venom. The fury in his voice is palpable, and it's clear he's reached the end of his patience.
You give Val a sly look, feigning pity. âAh, sorry Valentino. Seems this one canât quite let me go yetâ. You donât know what you were trying to achieve, but itâs certainly not working to dissipate any tension. Val doesnât respond to you though, all his focus on Sylus now.
âMy dear friend. You should know me by now. Thereâs something Iâm much more interested in now than some money. Now I want the girl, or nothingâ.
Valentino wears a shit eating grin on his face, soaking in the fact that he thinks heâs gained some control of the situation, unaffected by the gun on the table. Sylus simply sighs, rubbing his fingers against the temple of his forehead.
âI see where this is going thenâ.
You barely process whatâs happening before everything and everyone starts moving. As soon as Sylus begins to stand, Valentinos guards start shooting. Sylus wastes no time flipping the large table, sending the cards and game chips flying everywhere. You yelp as he yanks you towards him using his body and the table to shield the oncoming attack of bullets. You hear Luke and Kieran joining in the frenzy, yelling obscenities as they begin shooting their own hidden weapons.
You swiftly reach for the weapon concealed beneath your dress, your fingers brushing against the cool metal as you draw it out. Turning to face Sylus, you ready yourself for his instructions, your body tense with anticipation. Instead of giving you orders, he locks eyes with you, his gaze piercing through you with an intensity that feels like it's reaching into your very soul. The silence is heavy, charged with unspoken tension as bullets whip past the both of you, and you can feel your heartbeat quicken in response.
âI need you alive for whatâs coming sweetie. Pay attention, stay closeâ
You blink. Twice. Unable to process his words before he yanks you both up, one hand using his evol to send the table crashing into several bodyguards. The four of you fight your way through the onslaught of people coming into the door, before eventually dashing up the stairs. People are running in all directions, seemingly caught up in the chaos of everything. You all manage to make it out the door and into the brisk cold air, the twins quickly hopping into the car to whisk you away.
âGo on, Iâll catch up soonâ Sylus states, hurriedly pushing you into the car and slamming the door before you could protest. He signals Kieran to drive off, and that he does.
âHeâsâŚgoing to level the building. Isnât he?â you sigh, sighing at the fact that Sylus seemed to conveniently forget that this was in fact not the lawless land of the N109 Zone. No doubt the Hunterâs Association would have to investigate for potential wanderer activity, and that would be a lot of paperwork.
"It's fine. He owned that place anyway. He'll just build another," Luke says, his voice calm and unbothered. Just as the words leave his mouth, a deafening boom erupts behind the car, shaking the ground beneath yall. The explosion's shockwave rattles the windows, and the sky lights up with a fiery glow, cutting off Luke's next sentence mid-breath.
You groan.
The twins did drive you to the N109 this time, swiftly helping you out the car and into Sylusâs private villa. When you entered the front door, a nightgown and lacy underwear were laid neatly out for you in his room, your arrival clearly anticipated.
It wasnât more than an hour before Sylus waltzed in the front door, eyeing your slouching figure on the couch. You sit up as soon as you see him, still somewhat annoyed.
âWhat took you so damn long? Also do you have to level every building you come across?â you spat, glaring at him. He says nothing though, walking straight past you and into his room.
âHuh? Sylus?? What the hellâŚâ
Not liking the feeling of being ignored, you hurriedly chased after him. You had never really been uncomfortable barging into his room. You had done it plenty of times at this point, the first time being when he had challenged you to steal the brooch from him. No point in being shy now. Heâs fumbling with something in his drawer when you reach up to tap his shoulder.
âSylus! Donât ignore me, I know you ca-â
He swiftly turns around, grabbing your wrist before you can touch him. His gaze is unreadable, cold even. You start to sweat, trying to take your arm back. But he only squeezes tighter.
"I was hoping you'd leave me be so I could calm down. But of course you're as petulant as ever" he says.
"Let go! What's wrong with you!?" You attempt to remove his hand from your wrist but he doesn't budge.
âGo to the bed. Place your hands on itâ he says, face unchanging.
âHuh??â
âI donât like to repeat myselfâ.
You freeze for only a moment before quickly moving to the bed. You meticulously put your hands where instructed, something deep in your core telling you that itâs likely best to listen for now. However, you canât help to look over your should to quip at Sylus. Youâre slightly bent at an angle, trying your best to keep your balance.
âWhatâs this about? Iâm not that upset that you reduced the building to rubbleâ
Sylus snakes his way behind you, quietly, as if thinking of what to say. He reaches out a hand, grabbing the ends of your nightgown and moving the soft fabric around in his fingers. You feel the heat rise to your face, the skin of your ass feeling a slight gush of cold air.
âYou like playing games with me, donât you? Testing meâ he says coldly, fingers trailing up the back of your legs slowly. You shiver, attempting to squirm away. His evol appears around you, its tight grip making you cry out.
Oh. This was about that.
âHuh?? No, I was just playing along. Just friendly banter yknow?â you say, voice wavering. Youâve clearly pissed him off. A part of you knows itâs a slight lie. You didnât want to admit it out loud but it was kind of amusing to see Sylus get so riled up over something. Over you especially. But you hadnât exactly done it fully on purpose. It was the alcohol.
But you knew he wasnât buying it, as observant as he was.
âSure. You were just pretending to act like a stray kitten trying to find a new owner?â he smirks, his fingers beginning to trace circles over the cloth of your panties. You let out a small whine, his touch just barely grazing your already wet cunt.
âOwner? I donât belong to you. Or anyoneâ you scoff, the resolve in your voice wavering with every little circle he completes on your skin. You almost whine in disappointment when he pulls away.
âAnd yetâŚâ Sylus trails off, leaving you with aching curiosity before youâre met with stinging pain on your ass. You cry out, unable to move with his evol still snaked around you. âYou did exactly what I told you to do just now, wear the clothes I leave out for you, and practically melt everytime I even barely touch youâ.
âSylus?! What the hell was thatâŚ?!â you exclaim, trying your hardest to process his words and the situation at hand. He doesnât respond, proceeding to gently caress the spot where he smacked you. The stinging pain gently eases away, and you feel yourself relaxing with his touch once again. He once again trails his fingers down to your clothed pussy, rubbing slow and meticulous circles around it. You start to whine, attempting to push yourself into his fingers for more friction. He pulls his hand away, making a disapproving sigh.
âActing like youâre in heat per usualâ he chuckles, watching as you wiggle around under the grip of his evol. âThis is a punishmentâ.
âFor what? Cause I let some sick and ugly looking crime boss think he had a chance with me?â
Sylus wastes no time bringing his hand to your ass again, earning another painful whine out of you. You feel tears forming in your eyes that you canât wipe away. Heâs certainly not holding back his strength, and yet you know this isnât even a third of the force he could use on you.
âFor entertaining himâ he says plainly.
Another smack.
âAnother for stupidly handing over your life, body and soul for a measly twenty millionâ
An even harder hit, this one fueled by rage.
âAnd lastlyâŚâ
You nearly choke as he delivers the final blow, your ass definitely bruising by now. Sylus offers no comfort this time, instead leaning down next to your crying face, breath hot against your ear.
âFor forgetting that you belong to me, just as much as I belong to you. Kindred spirits remember?â
You have no chance to respond before heâs flipping you on your back, your nightgown flying up to reveal your wet panties.
âI-im sorry, Syâ you choke, tears blurring your vision.
âShow me then, sweetie. Spread your legs. Wideâ he instructs, reaching up to brush your tears away. This isnât done lovingly, more like calculated and cold.
This is far from over.
You silently but shakingly open your legs, your ass still painfully aching from his assault. Youâre surprised when he doesnât rip your underwear in two, choosing to rather peel them off your legs slowly. You notice the hunger in his eyes as he does so, as if savoring the view of your cunt at his fingertips. A small drop of arousal pools down your ass, and Sylus scoops it up with one finger.
You watch as he puts his finger in his mouth, savoring the drop of you with swiftness. His piercing gaze never leaves yours though, and you want to suddenly run away and hide. This is beyond thrilling, but you try your best to remain as still as possible, scared that heâll think youâre enjoying it too much and punish you accordingly.
You suddenly canât take the tension anymore, and close your eyes. You hear the sound of Sylus removing his belt from its loops, then the loud clang as it hits the floor. You feel the bed shift as he lowers himself over you, his face stopping just inches over yours, indicated by the sudden feel and warmth of his breath. He grabs your face in his hand and squeezes your jaw. Hard.
âLook at me kittenâ he commands, his tone filled with unkempt rage and anger. Your eyes fly open, terrified.
âIâm the only one that will ever taste you. Repeat itâ he says. Before you can get a word out, heâs pushing the fat tip of his cock in your entrance. You cry out in agony, nowhere near ready to have been penetrated. But he doesnât stop filling you.
âRepeat it. Or Iâll hit you again. Do you want that?â
âYouâre t-theâŚah!â you whine, his cock halfway inside you at this point. Your poor cunt feels like itâs being impaled, splitting pain soaring through your core.
âTry againâ
You let out a whimper, trying your best to push through the pain and put thoughts into words.
âYouâre the oh-only one that gets to taste meâ you choke out, voice wavering and your eyes teary. Sylus gives a hard thrust, pushing the rest of his length inside you. You cry out again, feeling like youâre on the verge of passing out. Sylus seems unmoved by your outbursts though.
âAnd?â
You stare at him, barely able to see his face through the tears. What? What does he mean and? He didnât say anything else did he?
âHu-what?â
You hear him sigh with disapproval, giving you yet another hard thrust. And another. And another. Youâre clinging onto his back now, nails digging into his skin as the sound of the bed creaking and your pants fill the room. Blood has probably been drawn on his back, not that heâd even notice. You can hear him grunting in your ear, clearly enjoying the feeling of you tightening around him when you tense from the pain. Although it still hurts, you can feel yourself accumulating to the shape and size of his length, and the pain lessons a bit more with each thrust. He stops once again, tilting your face in his grip.
âWhat did I say you forgot? Or is this kitten filled with too much cock to think straight now?â he mocks. You can hear the smile on his face despite not being able to see him clearly. Heat creeps up on your cheeks as you wrack your brain for answers.
âI-youâŚweâre kindred spirits?â
âBefore that sweetieâ
You blink the tears on your face away, your vision becoming a bit more clear. Although heâs still gazing down at you, his expression is not as angry as before. Seems heâs gotten a bit of his pent up anger out now.
âI belong to you, Sylusâ you say, voice small and whiny from crying. Thatâs definitely what he wanted to hear, as he began to pepper kisses on your neck, on your cheek, and eventually resting on your lips. You greedily return his affection, leaning into this feverish kiss, the both of you only periodically stopping to pant for air between kisses. He stops, resting his forehead with yours, gazing into your eyes once more.
âAnd I belong to you. Whatâs mine is yours. All of itâ
You donât get a chance to respond before heâs thrusting again, this time with a continuous and steady pace. You cling onto him, the exchange of flowery words and rigorous thrusting already bringing you on the verge of ecstasy. Sylus already noticed long before you did though, as he brought his hand between the two of you, circling your clit further your stimulation.
âGo ahead, come undone for meâ he whispers, voice strained for nearly being at his end too. Your body obeys, unraveling and writhing with pleasure as Sylus continues to pound into you. You ride your orgasm to its end, till the touching of your clit becomes too much and you whine from overstimulation.
âSylusâŚ!â you moan, and he stops, already at the start of his own climax. You shudder as you feel him spill into you, his seed immediately beginning to pool down your cunt and to your ass. He pulls his heavy cock out of you, a feeling of emptiness taking its place. For a moment nothing is said, just the sound of the both of you catching your breath.
You decide to break the silence.
âSylusâŚIâm really sorryâ you start, looking up at him. He simply chuckles, placing a kiss on your cheek before getting up to grab a rag from the bathroom.
âYouâve taken your punishment quite well, why are you apologizing again sweetie?â he says from the bathroom, coming back to wipe you clean. You scoff, slightly tensing from the coldness of the cloth.
âHmph. Fine, I take it back then. Iâm holding a grudge anyways for how hard you hit meâ
He simply sighs as he finishes wiping you up. âBack with the infamous wit already? Canât a man catch a break?â
You sit up, feeling emboldened once more.
âNope. Maybe donât hit me with the strength of a thousand suns next time and weâll seeâ
Sylus tosses the rag in a laundry basket, making his way back to your side. He pulls you into his arms, embracing you in his warmth. You canât help but smile against his chest.
âWell, good thing I have all night to make it up to youâ
You lightly pinch his side, giggling into his embrace. A question crosses your mind.
"Did you mean it Sylus? We belong to each other?"
Sylus took your face in his hand, giving you a slight smile.
"I don't say stuff I don't mean. You know this"
That's the furthest he was willing to explain it. At least for now. Who knows what kind of power trip would ensue if you truly knew how much you had the big bad leader of Onychinus wrapped around your finger.
#umi writes âĄď¸#sylus x reader#love and deepspace#sylus#sylus x reader smut#love and deepspace smut#love and deepspace sylus#l&ds smut#lads#lads smut#lads fic#lads scenarios#l&ds sylus#l&ds#love and deep space x reader#l&ds x reader#sylus x reader fic#love and deep space smut#lads sylus
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LOVE STORY
Max Verstappen x Author!Reader
Authorâs Note: IM BACK!! To put things into perspective, I started this smau when Alexâs insta was still private! Tbh I started writing it cause I like love her, I canât call her mother cause sheâs like a month older than me, but thatâs cousin right there. Anyways sorry for the hiatus i was spiralling due to a man đđ it happens to the baddest bitches, and also sort of writers block so pls give me requests! But to make up for the fact that Iâve been gone, this fic is fat as fuck so enjoy
â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘
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alexandrasaintmleux just posted
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alexandrasaintmleux: gorgeous gorgeous girls are published authors!!!! y/n, y/n! I remember when you used to force me to read when I wanted to play princesses and now youâve written a goddam book!!! In awe of u đđĽ°đĽ°
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yn.reads : ALEXXXX!! my gorgeous sister! I couldnât have done it without you!! Love you endlessly!
â user1 : wait r they sisters???!!
â user5 : no! hope this helps.
â user6 : pls use your brain
â user7 : theyâve known eachother forever! y/n moved to Monaco when she was 4, so they refer to eachother as sisters.
charles_leclerc: bravo y/n! Well deserved
maxverstappen1: đđťđđť
â user43: đ¤¨đ¤¨
â user10: wait do they know eachother?
â user15: not as far as i knowâŚ
â user12: Max doesnât even follow Alex, why is he here?
â user17: interesting đ¤đ¤
â alexandrasaintmleux: very interestingâŚ
yn.reads just posted
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yn.reads: @alexandrasaintmleux thank you for letting me shake ass on your yacht, and cosplay as a rich monegasque while doing it! Your support has meant the world to me, youâre the reason Everything I Know About Love was written, cause you have taught me everything I know about love, friendship, life! You can purchase my book in just under a week guys!!
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alexandrasaintmleux: Iâm so proud of you baby xx
â yn.reads: i love you so much alex, i had to write 124,567 words to express it
â alexandrasaintmleux: đĽšđĽš
âcharles_leclerc: am i intruding on something?
â yn.reads: yes!
user12: no but Alex and y/nâs friendship is literally my favourite thing
user11: is y/n not a rich monegasque?
â user10: sheâs not even from Monaco, and she grew up with a single mum who Iâm p sure just has a normal job so no
user14: not y/n using Alex for her money
â yn.reads: do yâall never get tired? Or is hating on the internet like your job?
â user14: no I have an actual job you should try it sometimeâŚ
â yn.reads: girl???? I just wrote a book?????
maxverstappen1 : I will read this book
â yn.reads: thank you max verstappen, current f1 champion
â user16: đ¤¨đ¤¨đ¤¨
â alexandrasaintmleux: what am I witnessing rn
â yn.reads: đđ
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yn.reads: BOOKLAUNCHBOOKLAUNCHBOOKLAUNCH
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lewishamilton: đđžđđž
â yn.reads: WHAT THE FRICK LEWISHAMILTON??? What are you doing here??????!!
â alexandrasaintmleux: girl you good??
â yn.reads: am I good?? AM IGOOD?? Lewis freaking Hamilton knows I exist!!!
â charles_leclerc: please stop embarrassing me in front of my coworkers
â yn.reads: kick rocks leclerc
pierregasly: well done, me and kika already have our copies
â yn.reads: đĽşđĽş thank you pear and kiks
alexandrasaintmleux: so proud of you mon ange
â yn.reads: I love you so much alex
â user12: their friendship is so cute I canât
â yn.reads: friendship?? Weâre lovers!
â user12: wait are you actually???
â charles_lecelrc: NO
â yn.reads: donât be jealous sharl
charles_leclerc: well done I guess
â yn.reads: thank you I guess
â alexandrasaintmleux: aww my two favourite people getting along â¤ď¸đĽşđĽş
â user12: I need my doctor to prescribe me whatever the fuck Alex is on EXPEDITIOUSLY
user14: girl no one gives a fuck about your book launch, we want to know wtf happened at the after party??!
âuser15 wait, did I miss something what happened?
â user14: itâs all over social media but it starts with max and ends in verstappen
maxverstappen1: simply lovely
â user14: well well well
â user15: and she didnât even interact with his comment
â user14: very interestingâŚ
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maxverstappen1 just posted
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maxverstappen1: Iâve got a NYT bestselling author teaching me how to read
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charles_leclerc: I made this happen everyone! It was me! I did it!
â yn.reads: yes well done percy, weâre well aware
â user12: wait a minute Charles did something nice for y/n?
â user14: my moneys on the fact he was just trying to get rid of her so he could spend time with Alex
â charles_leclerc: what if i told you im a mastermind đ
yn.reads: it isnât much but itâs honest work đ
â danielricciardo: has he learnt his abcâs??
â yn.reads: just about he gets stuck on x, itâs a very difficult letter
â danielricciardo: happens to the best of us đ
â yn.reads: @/danielricciardo hey I actually have a question for you??
â maxverstappen1: NO!! Y/N DO NOT ASK UR QUESTION
â yn.reads: âšď¸âšď¸
user16: is this a hard launch??
â user14: Idek anymore đ
â user17: like knowing y/n she might actually just be giving him reading lessons
â maxverstappen1: guys of course I can actually read
â user16: yeah sure you can! Thatâs the spirit!
yn.reads: I bagged the baddest bitch yâall
âmaxverstappen1: đââď¸đââď¸đ
đźđ
đź
â alexandrasaintmleux: I thought I was the baddest bitch???
â yn.reads: oh my god⌠OH MY GOD, I didnât think this through⌠@/maxverstappen1 what do you think of a throuple??
â maxverstappen1: NO
â charles_leclerc: NO
â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘
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#f1 smau#formula 1 smau#formula one smau#f1 fanfic#f1 x reader#max verstappen smau#max verstappen x you#max verstappen x reader#max verstappen fic#max verstappen x black!reader#max verstappen imagine#f1 x black!reader#x black fem reader
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get you alone | ljn ( m )
ideally, jeno should have his hands full with teaching. (un)fortunately, he only seems to have his head full of you.
pairing: tutor!jeno x reader verse: college au rating: r ( minors, do not interact! ) warnings & tags: jeno is a college algebra math tutor & reader is failing, written in lapslock, not betaâd in any shape or form so please excuse mistakes, unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it, folks), piv, oral (f!receiving), use of pet names (kitten, angel, sweetheart), praise, reader calls jeno âsunbaeâ until she doesnât, size kink i guess if u squint! word count: 8.5k
a/n : actually this was written for a different fandom but iâve decided to make it a jeno fic bc idk why not! first time writing in a different perspective so itâs a bit odd for me & i can't say i fw with this style nor am i particularly proud of this fic but she is ... sumn! also i fear i have a thing for the math tutor trope but thatâs neither here nor there AHA enjoy !!Â
if you liked it, please consider reblogging to support (especially because this may get flagged for mature content)!
there wasnât anything special about your case; at least, thatâs what jeno had thought when he picked up your request before he met you. before he met you, you were just another student trying to demystify the painfully enigmatic art of getting through college algebra. before he met you, he had already tagged this case as another charity stint â a good way to get brownie points with the deanâs office and the mathematics and natural sciences department. in fact, thinking of all his tutoring cases as community service made them somewhat palatable, if not a little forgettable. he was quite sure, at the time, that youâd be in and out â both of the tutoring center and his memory. such was the case with most of his other tutees, anyway.Â
he hadnât expected you to be⌠well, you â a pretty little thing, with your sweet smile and your wide doe eyes. on the first day, youâd stood out; youâd arrived at the tutoring centerâs lobby in a short dress, knit cardigan, and coquettish makeup, as if every fiber of your being were bidding the spring a solid farewell. multiple heads had turned, including his, as you came up to the front desk and asked for one lee jeno for college algebra. you were eager for summer, jeno had learned as you broke the ice little by little, in part because you looked forward to visiting okinawa with your family, but also because you were eager to get your first semester out of the way. that much, you had in common with most of his other students â almost all of the ones seeking help in college algebra only took it as a depressing core requirement of whatever degree they were doing. you, specifically, were focusing on fashion design; that very vividly explained your attention to your looks. this mathematics class was a thorn in your side, a mandatory thing that was simply supposed to get you through later business-oriented classes in your degree program. for jeno, however, college algebra had become the perfect excuse from the moment heâd laid eyes on you.Â
the more time he spends with you, the more he thinks youâre exactly his taste. it starts off with little things he finds attractive, things he picks up while heâs watching you fill out the practice sheets heâs prepared for you on quadratic equations or while trying to get you to understand logarithms â your neat, tiny handwriting, almost like print; your habit of boxing your final answers in firm strokes, even if theyâre hopelessly wrong; your colored tabs, cascading down the page side of your textbook. but as the weeks wear on, he sees all the little things in between â the way your long eyelashes quiver when you stop and close your eyes as you think for the answer, the upturn of your plush lips when you have the same answer on the practice sheet as he does, the deepening of your artificial blush with a natural hue when you realize you donât know the answers to his gentle questions. he notices that you refuse to wear anything longer than a knee-length skirt despite the still-strong winds, notices that your tiny palms are always smooth and pink, that your hair always smells of coconut milk. these are things he canât help but jot down in his memory â that was exactly what you were, after all: memorable.Â
and the more he remembers about you, the more jeno wants you. yet heâs never made a move, never given so much as a hint of his interest, not only because there are prying eyes all around the building but also because you have never so much as shown a smidge of desire back. in fact, he has to wonder if youâve ever thought of him in a different capacity â not as a tutor, but as a man. if you have, youâve never made that obvious; you always talk to him respectfully, the little wall youâve erected between the both of you remaining steady, and you never let your eyes linger on his face for longer than it takes for him to explain what you donât know. jeno has had his fair share of female students, and in all of them, heâs seen the same kind of hunger â to few, heâs catered to their whims, if only to pass the time, if only for his own benefit. but you, with your ribbons in your hair and your sweet, sweet mouth, have never once shown that same kind of desire.Â
he doesnât know if it frustrates him, but he does know one thing â it makes him want you all the more.Â
he wants you even now, as you sit across from him, dolled up as usual. even now, as your eyes take on a glassy sheen of defeat, your cheeks puffing out in the way that tells him youâre admonishing yourself once again, he craves you â maddeningly so. and he realizes that it doesnât really matter if you're not the one to fall first, as long as he can still have you.Â
âtime out,â you beg, your fingers meeting the palm of your hand to signal a break. âmy brain feels like itâs going to explode.â
âyou just had a break ten minutes ago,â jeno reminds you, though thereâs a lighthearted amusement to his voice that makes you smile sheepishly. âat this rate, youâll be on more breaks than youâll be taking the time to actually learn.â
âiâm trying,â you groan, your fingers curling against your forehead as you bump your head against your fist. âi just donât think iâm cut out for this polynomial whatever â trial and error bullshit.âÂ
âyouâll hate me for saying this â but youâll never know unless you keep trying.âÂ
âfunny.â your sigh rustles the papers in front of you gently. âhow do you do it, sunbae?â
âhm?âÂ
âyouâre not only good at this stuff, but youâre so good youâre able to take the time to teach people like me.âÂ
âstrengths and weaknesses â itâs the natural way of the world.â jeno smiles gently at you, and he notes how his chest feels tighter when you return the sentiment shyly. âi could never do what youâre doing in your own degree, try as i might. anyway, youâll get there. i wonât let you become my first ever failed project, you know.â
âi wouldnât want to let you down either, sunbae, butââ the back end of your pencil taps lightly against the surface of the table. âit just feels hopeless. i canât focus on anything. itâs so⌠so abstract, and everyone here is talking all at once, and i donât even know what iâm ever going to get out of this class in the long run.âÂ
even when youâre dejected, you look pretty; your bottom lip juts out naturally when you whine like this, and for a moment, jeno canât say anything in response. heâs too busy wondering what your mouth would feel like on his â on him. when he snaps himself out of his brief reverie, he notices youâre looking around at everyone else â and he has to agree that with the noise level in this whole building, it isnât the most conducive site for learning, especially when the learner is already so averse to the subject matter.
âi canât help much in the way of it being too abstract,â he says kindly. âbut itâs not a requirement for us to have our sessions here. i know it can be quite distracting, all these voices flying around, so why donât you look for a place that better suits you, and we can start meeting there instead? the more comfortable you are in your environment, the better youâll be able to absorb the material, iâm sure.âÂ
âyou think?â your pencil comes to a slow halt as you refocus on him, a thoughtful light glimmering behind your gaze. âyeah â yeah, i actually wouldnât mind that. then, iâll look for a different place for us to meet, and we can start there next week. how does that sound?â
âwhatever suits you suits me,â he responds easily.Â
he lowers his gaze immediately after you flash him a blinding grin; there are far too many people here, as you both very well know, and if he keeps looking at you and your pretty little expressions any longer, he might just give them something to actually look at.Â
it had been your idea, not his, so why did jeno feel like heâd dragged you into a compromising situation?
youâd texted him over the weekend that your search for a new venue had been absolutely fruitless; every cafe and study space youâd been to was either too expensive or equally as packed with people, if not both. jeno had seen the preview to your message, but he hadnât been prepared for what it read out in full when heâd actually opened it.Â
sunbae, would it be too difficult to just meet at my apartment? i attached a map, so let me know!
it wouldnât be too difficult; logistics-wise, it was walking distance from campus and almost directly across the train station he takes home. it also definitely promised an environment you were comfortable in, and you wouldnât have to worry about excess noise from any other tutoring groups. no, the difficulty really only lied in himself â you two, all alone, would certainly mean his mind would be up to no good for the two hours every monday, wednesday, and thursday you would be together.Â
but for your sake, heâd try to rein it in, with the operative word being try.Â
your place is as neat and as pretty as you are; he doesnât know if youâve cleaned up for him, or if youâre naturally this organized, but he likes it all the same. it smells of toasted marshmallow and expensive perfume, and all your furniture matches. jeno supposes he likes that in a woman â someone able to care for herself, someone who cares about herself. and youâre always just as neat and pretty to match, with your hair always styled sweetly, your makeup always enhancing your features.Â
the problem is that now that heâs in here, where you live, and where you spend most of your time, jenoâs mind seems to wander too much towards thoughts about what you do in private. he rejects studying on the couch, not just because itâs bad for posture and concentration but also because he canât help but imagine you pressed into the cushions by his hand. he suggests the small dining table you have, but on the second meeting at your place, he starts thinking about what you might look like seated on the table, your ass hanging over the edge and his face buried between your thighs. whenever you look up to ask him something, he drinks in your lovely, made-up face again, and starts wondering what your makeup would look like ruined before he interrupts that trainwreck of a thought with the answer to your question.Â
by the end of the week, jenoâs defenses are all but shot, and he realizes that this situation might be optimal for you, but it definitely isnât doing him and his now constantly straining cock any great favors.Â
he supposes that your performance has somewhat improved; youâre less likely to trail off when youâre thinking and can actually do practice sets for a lot longer without all the noise and hubbub around you. your only real hindrance is yourself and your frustration; you have a habit of giving into your carelessness that sends you spiraling into despair, and it doesnât help that when you press your cheek against the surface of your dining table and whine, the comfort jeno offers is noticeably delayed because heâs too busy thinking about his cock between your lips.Â
âmy dadâs going to kill me if i fail this midterm,â you grumble, stabbing the practice sheet with your pencil; it skids sideways, and jeno robotically fixes it back into proper alignment for you, careful not to brush against the arm thatâs folded inwards, supporting your chin. âhe only agreed to let me take this degree because of the business aspect of it. as if iâll need to know aboutââ you check the header of the worksheet. âdomain and range when iâm doing actual design work.â
âyouâll never know what might be useful later on in life. i definitely thought this was nonsense back in high school â and then i got this job.âÂ
âand now youâre rolling in dough?â you smile slightly. jeno chuckles.Â
âiâm a long way away from having myself a scrooge mcduck golden pool, but i make enough to get by very comfortably, thanks to this.âÂ
âthanks to me, you mean.â
âyouâre not my only student,â he snorts, pinching your elbow; you cry out exaggeratedly. âfocus up. the hourâs almost over, and you should have finished with this much earlier.â
âcan you leave it as homework?â
ânot a chance.â
you blow out a sharp puff of air. âmy mom used to do this thing where sheâd give me rewards if i did well with my homework. i wish iâd still get something out of this.âÂ
âwhat kind of rewards did she give you?âÂ
âchocolates â candy, or sometimes weâd go out for milk tea together, if i did a particularly good job.â
âthis is math tutoring, not a trip to the dentist,â jeno says, amused.Â
âa trip to the dentist would be more enjoyable,â you mutter under your breath, picking up your pencil and doodling an angry face next to the number youâre only halfway through solving. âthis totally blows.âÂ
âtry to finish this before the hourâs up, and iâll see if i can get you something nice. out of my own paycheck,â he stresses, prodding at your cheek to shift your attention back to the paper. he doesnât miss the fact that your eyes light up, childish as the promise is.Â
he doesnât know if thatâs really what motivates you, but you do manage to finish the worksheet with a few minutes to spare before the clock hits seven, and that earns you some light, solo applause. it isnât much by way of true praise, but you flush with pride all the same. jeno packs his things in silence as you get yourself a glass of water, and you see him to the door. only there does he notice your eager eyes, your expectant smile.Â
âwhatâs going through that pretty little head of yours?â
âare you really going to give me a reward? i did great today, you know,â you respond bluntly.Â
âyou were serious about that?â he laughs.Â
âabsolutely. i earned it.â you raise a slim finger, wagging it in his face. he trails it with his gaze, no shortage of amusement in his eyes. ânext monday, i want something sweet.â
jeno takes in the sight of you, keeping your door open with your hip; he wonders if you know what youâre doing to him, what youâre asking of him â if you even know thereâs nothing that could possibly be sweeter than you at this very moment. he drinks in the sight of your feigned haughty expression on your pretty features, the unnervingly low dip of your tank top, the tempting hemline of your shorts, and feels like you must be aware of what heâs going to do next.Â
âif itâs something sweet you want, you donât have to wait until next week.âÂ
he does it before he can think it through â surely, thereâs nothing too harmful about a quick kiss? he angles your chin upward with his thumb and forefinger before you can even react to his words, and he tastes you like that for the first time. youâre just as soft and as sweet as heâd imagined, if not more so.Â
when jeno pulls away, you step back; thereâs shock written all over your face, your mouth still hanging open slightly. your voice is gentle, shaky when you start speaking.Â
âsunbae, whaââ
âsee you next week. rest up over the weekend, or thereâll be consequences.âÂ
he finds it easy to joke with you now, even after what heâs done â finds it easy to wave goodbye with nonchalance as he walks to the elevator, now that heâs gotten one thing out of his system. the look on your face, the growing blush across the bridge of your nose and your temples is indication enough for jeno to feel confident â if you hadnât thought about him that way before, you were sure to spend the next few days doing exactly that.Â
itâs exactly a week before your midterm exam, and jeno notices youâre less than focused.Â
heâd let you stew over the weekend, not expecting much by way of communication; indeed, his phone hadnât once been jostled by your texts. heâd taken that silence to assume that youâd been wrapped up in thoughts of the kiss heâd left you with, and you did not disappoint on that front; the next monday saw you fidgety, flushed, and constantly faltering in your words. you asked less questions, which normally indicated a problem, but today, heâd let it slide; you definitely had a little too much on that pretty little brain of yours.Â
he notices youâre still dolled up â your eyelids are shimmery, and your lips are glossy; youâre wearing a tennis skirt that hits all the right buttons for him, too. itâs true that youâre always pretty well-dressed and put together, but today somehow feels different. if before, jeno had always seen you dressed up simply to look good, today it feels a little more like youâre dressed up to look good for him. he knows itâs a little bit egotistical to assume as much, but he also doesnât miss the side glances you throw at him when you think heâs not looking at you answering your textbook or the way your cheeks glow when you make the slightest bit of eye contact.Â
still, you try to focus as much as you can; itâs adorable, in fact, to see all your valiant efforts to appear unperturbed. he figures heâll play along for as long as you will â what matters to him, after all, is that youâre in the game to begin with. you complain less today, focus on your worksheets, and jeno even manages to witness the sight of your forehead creasing up as you concentrate on a particularly difficult item. youâre adorable, in the kind of way that makes him want to pin you down and have his way with you.Â
you finish your work without a fuss today; you only actually asked for his help twice, which was a feat in and of itself. and again, when the session is over, you walk him to the door.
this time, when you linger, he waits; youâre clearly not good at hiding your true intentions, as itâs become clear you have something you want to say. as you try to piece your thoughts together, jeno reaches into his backpackâs front pocket and extracts todayâs gift â an actual chocolate bar, albeit a rather run of the mill one.Â
âwhatâs this?â you ask, your thought process clearly derailed as confusion takes over your features.Â
âyour reward. for a good job last week and today â you said you wanted one, didnât you?âÂ
âbut i thoughtââ you stop yourself, your mouth opening and closing, suddenly wordless. jeno grins.Â
ânot good enough? i picked that up from a convenience store on my way here, so it definitely isnât anything special, but i thought it would at least be a good motivator.â
youâre turning red, and thereâs turmoil in your eyes â he enjoys this, he realizes, the way he flusters you. if he had known this would be the result, he would have made a move much sooner. you shift your weight from one foot to the other, back and forth, obviously weighing out your options too. finally, you say, âalright.â
âyou seem disappointed.â
âiâm not.â
âiâll get you a better brand next time, if you really donât like it.âÂ
âitâs not that.â
âso what is it?â he doesnât expect you to say it, and you donât defy expectations; your bottom lip just quivers, and jeno chuckles low under his breath, stepping forward just past your doorway, just a little bit closer to you. âdonât tell me you wanted something completely different?â
you donât say so, but he knows; he can tell by the way you tilt your head back, the way your lips part slightly, the gloss still trailing along the seam. he can tell by the way your torso arches just a little bit closer, almost like an accident. he can tell by the way your eyes bore into his, almost pleading.Â
âwhat you did last weekâŚâ you start, but your voice trails off into nothing soon after. he chuckles again.
âah, that. i might have gotten ahead of myself.âÂ
âwas that all?â you press.
âand what would you do, if it wasnât?â
âwell â do you always like to play games?â
âi have a penchant for playing with my food before i eat it, if that answers your question.â he smiles down at your still-reddening face. âi was giving you a reward, as you wanted. i came up short on options then and there. youâll let it slide this once, wonât you?â
âyou did that just because i did well last week?â
âof course.â
âwell, i did well today, too.âÂ
âyou did, and thatâs why you have this.â he gestures to the chocolate bar in your hand.Â
âi donât want this.â your voice is stubborn now, heated and frustrated, and you stuff the chocolate back into his hand. you must not like having to ask for something so blatantly â itâs too bad jeno wants to hear it in those exact words.Â
âtell me what you really want, then.âÂ
youâre still unable to find the words, but your hands do the talking for you; they press into his shoulders and give you leverage to tiptoe until youâre just close enough to his lips. but you donât close that gap, your mouth quivering only inches away from his, and oh, jeno wants to toy with you, but youâre just too irresistible this close to him. his warm palms press against your jaw, keeping your face steady as he closes the gap, and this time, he doesnât just get a brief taste of you â jeno claims your lips with the thirst of a man whoâs stumbled upon an oasis in the desert.Â
you must have thought about this moment long and hard over the weekend, because the nonchalant side of you thatâs turned a blind eye to him is completely gone; he drinks in your soft noises and short, breathless gasps â all signs of your eagerness â until heâs drunk on the taste of you. the deeper the kiss gets, the less you can keep up, but you try, and jeno always likes rewarding your efforts, his wide tongue taut and flush against your tiny one in the sweet, warm cavern of your mouth. he licks every inch of it, leaves the mild nicotine taste of himself there, before he pulls away slowly. your eyes are still closed when he creates distance, fluttering open in a happy haze a few seconds later.Â
âgood enough for you?â he murmurs, tucking a soft lock of hair behind your ear. you hum in assent through your dazed smile, and jeno knows he wonât be the only one looking forward to this coming wednesday.
youâd done really well today.
jenoâs proud of you â prouder than heâs been of most of his students in his career here at the university, actually. youâd finally answered a worksheet almost perfectly, save for a couple of numbers where youâd forgotten to round up, and those things are absolutely negligible at this point (by his books, anyway). youâve been on your best behavior yet, avoiding all forms of complaint, and he knows fully well why, but he wonât criticize you for your hard work all the same, no matter the motivation behind it.Â
in fact, youâve done so good that he doesnât wait until heâs about to leave to give you your sweet reward â which is why, twenty minutes before heâs meant to go, heâs got you on your couch, your legs spread, each one hooked over his shoulders.Â
truth be told, youâd been good way before the lesson had started; youâd answered the door in a crop top and the tiniest pair of shorts youâve dared to wear yet â all clothes that you couldnât yet wear outside yet, given the weather. selfishly, jeno is thankful for this fact, and if he had to list down other things heâs thankful for, just off the top of his head, itâs that you no longer meet in the tutoring center and that your apartmentâs walls seem thick and well-reinforced.Â
âsunbae, donât tease me.â your silly little whining voice makes its first appearance of the day, but all jeno does is smile â itâs an almost wicked expression, set firmly between your thighs. âyou said i did really well today. donât tell me youâre backing out on rewarding me?â
ânot at all, sweetheart,â he hums, pressing a small kiss to your inner thigh. he likes seeing you shiver at the contact, likes the way youâre chewing on your lip in what appears to be slight agitation. âjust thinking of how much of a reward you deserve.âÂ
in all honesty, jeno would like to take every bit of you now; youâre already so ready for him, anyway. he can smell the faint perfume of your arousal, can see the way youâre anticipating the most from him, and a part of him doesnât want to deny you of that. the larger part of him has dreamed of burying his cock into you, anyway, and why wouldnât he do that? but something also tells him to wait â or, rather, to make you wait, to make you want him just a little more.Â
and so, he decides.
his mouth finds your skin again, pressing kisses up your thigh; they get wetter, hotter as his mouth moves up, until his nose and lips are buried against your clothed core. you squirm in response, but his grip on your thighs keeps you relatively steady, even as his tongue presses against thin fabric. the wet muscle pushes sharp against your tiny entrance, the tip meeting slight resistance against your shorts and panties, but he finds a way, burying half his tongue in alongside damp cloth.Â
youâre already wet like this, and so needy that it might be possible for jeno to get you off just like this, still clothed, but the hunger in him spikes once you call out to him.Â
âsunbae, pleaseâŚâ
with a groan, his fingers yank the fabric aside, exposing your pussy to the warmth of his breathing. itâs as pink, as pretty, as tiny as the rest of you, as fuckable as heâd imagined it would be, and he wastes no time in pressing his tongue flat against your folds, dragging it up in a wide, messy stripe; the muscle only tenses when it bumps against your clit, his tongue flicking upwards to tease it.Â
youâre so reactive, even at the slightest things â you whimper, you squeeze your eyes shut, you squirm. youâre begging to be fucked, and jenoâs cock is strained tight against his jeans, but your taste is so addicting that he canât help but dive back in. his tongue eases between your folds now, spreading them apart until theyâre lewd and sticky with his saliva, and the nub of your clit has grown so pronounced now â so pert and lovely that he canât help but purse his lips around it and suck with excess force.Â
âsunbae â fâfuck,â you mewl; you almost sound tearful. âfâfeels so goodâŚâ
jeno wants to tell you how fucking good you taste, how beautiful the sounds youâre making are, but his mouth is too busy; his teeth rake down your cunt lightly, earning him a jerk of your hips, and he has to place pressure down on your thighs again to make sure youâre still enough for him to slip his tongue into your cunt.Â
he can tell even just by that how tight youâd be around him; your walls are warm around his tongue, and thereâs a pressure against the muscle that tells him how good itâd feel for his cock to take its place. as if to simulate his desires, he presses his tongue deeper in, fucks you shallowly with its wetness until your whimpers become little sobs, broken and choked back. his thumb drags across your slit then settles against your clit, and he can feel the thrum of your pulse against the pad of his finger, beckoning him. he complies, easily, thumb tracing circles around the nub that start off slow, only for him to ramp up the pace alongside his tongue.Â
youâre easily at fault for that; the way you whine for him, call him sunbae, tell him how good it feels over and over â why wouldnât he want more of you?Â
heâs not sure which of you really earns the sweet reward today; you cum on his tongue, your cunt trembling against his mouth and your fingers threaded into his hair, but heâs the one who comes out licking his lips like heâs had the best treat of his damn life.
come the middle of next week, jeno finds himself face to face with a test paper â one already clearly marked, with a number circled on the top-right corner. ninety. a stellar grade for anyone, and especially for you.Â
you know it, and you look absolutely triumphant; youâre practically shining as you perch on your little dining table, your perfectly manicured finger jabbing at the score in emphasis.Â
âflying colors, wouldnât you say?âÂ
âcolor me impressed,â jeno replies smoothly, a genuine smile of pride tugging at his lips; he turns the page over, scanning your responses. you still draw your parabolas a little on the small side, making them a bit difficult to discern, and youâve still got the habit of not rounding your answers up, but this is tremendous work, and heâll be the first to praise you for it. âyour dad must be filled to the brim with joy now, right?â
âi havenât told him yet. you were the first.â
âwell, iâm proud of you, sweetheart.âÂ
âproud enough to give me a reward?âÂ
he looks down at you in feigned thoughtfulness. here you sit, back in your little tennis skirt, looking up at him with hopeful eyes under those long, curled lashes. for someone who spent the first half of this semester acting ostensibly nonchalant, youâd very easily shown your true colors soon after â not that he really minds. in fact, heâs taken a decided kind of liking to how eager and willing youâve come to be.Â
âweâve only just started our session, though,â he hums out, an idle thumb grazing his chin as he watches your expression turn from bright to cloudy, the beginnings of strategy darkening your gaze. itâs not like he wants to say no; he has no real intention to. but seeing you squirm in want makes him feel good about his decision to hold out a little longer â never mind the ache in his cock even then. âdonât we usually leave the rewards for a later time?âÂ
âi was thinking â since itâs the start of a new lesson ââÂ
âwe wouldnât want you falling behind from the start, would we?â
âi promise i wonât,â you pout. âi promise iâll put in my best effort next time.âÂ
ânext time? sweetheart, donât tell me youâre thinking to get off scot-free todayâŚâ jeno trails off, his hand falling to the nearest surface it can reach â which, logic seems to dictate, is your soft, milky thigh. he feels you tense under his palm, and he bites back a smile, keeping his expression level. âi just donât know.â
your small hands grip at the front of his shirt, and he hears you, for the first time, doing something heâs always wanted to hear you do.Â
âplease, sunbae?â
how could he say no to you? he hadnât really planned on it, had only wanted to see you do this, but itâs still too much and beyond his expectation â your misty gaze, your quivering lip. itâs almost laughable that you donât think heâd notice the way you shift yourself so that his hand, still warm against your thigh, slides up your skin, the hem of your skirt bunched up in the junction between his thumb and forefinger.
jeno chuckles â isnât this exactly where and how heâs always wanted you? âhow could you ask me like that and expect me to refuse, angel? in that case, i have no real choice but to dedicate all our time today to your reward.âÂ
your breathing hitches â in anticipation, in desire, in excitement â as his hand continues its trail upward, deliberately now, fingers hooking into the waistband of your panties. his head dips down, rests into the crook of your neck, and he inhales the thick, sweet scent of your perfume, your shampoo, of you and all that heâll take from you.Â
âjust remember, you asked for this,â he murmurs against your skin. âso iâm going to take every bit of you until thereâs nothing left for anyone else.âÂ
youâre so willing, so ready even before he can get his full bearings; your hips are rising slightly off the table, and jeno feels like itâs you thatâs telling him to move faster. he tugs down your panties, letting gravity take its course until theyâre a tiny puddle of fabric on the floor, and he slots himself between your legs. like this, you have no choice but to spread, and you do so without hesitation, your knees locking against his sides as he pulls you in for a tight, hungry kiss. thereâs that taste of you he loves, that clean, sweet buzz that draws him in, and his hands are bruisingly tight on your waist as he reclaims your lips.Â
you already look dazed when he pulls away, which is always cute, but a little unfair â jeno wants you to be aware still when he takes you, and damn, if he doesnât want to take you right fucking now. he kisses you again, harder and more demanding, as if willing your attention back to him, while his hands explore you â run up your thighs, fingers brushing against the plush curve of your ass. itâs not enough, not by a long shot, and heâs pushing the waistline of your skirt up your stomach with his hands, letting his warmth transfer onto your skin; he chuckles as your stomach sucks inward at his touch, just as you let out a gasp against his lips.
and he wants desperately to hear that noise again; in fact, he wants to know what you sound like in every capacity. his mouth works down your neck, pleased to find that suckling wet and languid on a spot just above your collarbone has you writhing and whimpering. are you sensitive or touch-starved? whatever the reason, he wants to draw all of that out of you, his hands drawing back down to hook under your thighs. jeno drags you to the edge of the table, until your bare cunt is flush against the front of his jeans, and he lets you feel him â a brief tease of whatâs to come.Â
âiâm sâso wet already,â you whisper, as if he doesnât know â as if you know itâs exactly what he wants to hear anyway. âsunbae, please, i need you.â
ânot that,â he murmurs, his teeth grazing your collarbone as he speaks. ânot sunbae. jeno. call me jeno, angel.â
âjeno,â you exhale shakily, and itâs music to his ears â as if the last thing holding him back from you had shattered.Â
âthatâs it â what a good girl,â he purrs, his hips rocking forward against your pussy before they retract, leaving just enough space for his hand to slip between. slender fingers trail down your folds, sticky and slick. âyou are all wet for me, arenât you? ready to take me deep inside?âÂ
even the way you nod, a tiny movement of assent, drives him wild, yet a part of him still wants to test the limit of your patience, his middle finger stretching to circle your entrance.Â
âwouldnât want to shock your tiny little pussy, though, would i? will you let me stretch you out first, kitten?â
âyes,â you mewl, sounding almost tearful. âanythingâ anything, please.â
jeno drinks in the long, drawn-out keen you set free when his digit sinks into you; heâs already felt your walls against his tongue, but a small part of him is still surprised at just how tight you are. that same part nags that he might not fit easily into you, but whatever that voice is is easily drowned out by a more assertive promise â heâll make it fit.Â
âcanât tell you how much iâve wanted to feel your pretty little hole around my cock,â he presses on, his finger pushing deeper in; he feels you tense a delicious kind of tightness, as if itâs almost too much for you. is it? âever since that first day you came into the tutoring center, dressed up all cute â did you do that on purpose, sweetheart?â
âyes,â you admit, breathless; the syllable is lengthened into a weak moan as jeno pumps his finger into you, slow, deep strokes that tease your tacky walls open. âwanted â wanted to make a good impressionâŚâ
âand you did, didnât you? kept looking so sweet for me, so pretty every single time â got me thinking about all the ways i wanted to have you. got me so fucking hard every time weâd meet â is that what you wanted?â
jeno doesnât give you much room to respond, but he can make his own answers to appease himself anyway; he reclaims your lips, already eager for another taste of you, and you comply with the same amount of desire, your soft whimpers melting against his teeth. in the space of pseudo silence, wet, messy noises, he manages to tease another digit into you, and you cry out against his lips as it pushes in, joining the first in how deep it reaches. he absorbs that too, takes in every minute sound you make, relishes the way you pulse around his fingers. even without the noises, he can tell your pleasureâs heightening, with the way you clench around him, your hips rocking pitifully as youâre eager to rut against his palm.Â
âlook at you now.â heâs selfish, but he doesnât care â he wants to ruin you, and if the telltale squelch of your cunt as he fucks his fingers into it isnât indication enough, then the way your mouth hangs open as he pulls away, letting his name fall freely from your lips, definitely is. âlegs spread, all desperate to feel good for me. what a needy little kitten you are. this good enough for you, angel?â
you shake your head, only to squeal as he pulls you closer, his fingers shoving deeper into you; your hips are re-angled, allowing him to brush the pads of his digits against the rough, sweet spot, and he feels triumph bloom in his chest as you throw your head back, teary eyes squeezed shut.
âno, no, no,â you babble, and he can see the bob of your throat as you swallow hard, clutching at sense to make words. âwant â need your cock, want to cum on your cock so badly, jeno â want you to fuck me, stretch me open, please ââ
âgreedy, arenât you?â he murmurs, leaning in to nip at the spot heâd left reddened above your collarbone. âgo on then â show me how much you want it. show me what a good girl you are, and cum on my fingers.âÂ
âbutââÂ
âcome on, angel,â he urges above the squelching noises, increasing surely in volume. his fingers meet resistance when they spread apart inside you, but all it does is create a delicious friction that has you squirming in his hold. âdonât hold back. let me see you fall apart.âÂ
and you do, so prettily, your eyes rolling back and your voice unrestrained. jenoâs fingers ride you through your orgasm, pumping deep and steady despite how slick youâve gotten, your juices coating his hand and wrist. he watches the flush rise to your neck, stopping at your cheeks, watches the heaving of your chest, the shine of your skin from a thin sheen of sweat, and he doesnât want to let you come down from this high, but his cock is aching â practically bursting from his jeans â and all he can do is make the silent vow that the next time you look like this, heâll be balls deep in you.Â
âthatâs my girl,â he coos gently, watching the tension slip from your shoulders; his free hand is at the small of your back quickly, easing you down as your torso falls back, and youâre laying on the table. âpretty little thing, arenât you? cumming so sweetly for me.âÂ
âjeno,â you groan out weakly, your tiny hand clasping around his wrist. âcock â i want your cock, pleaseââÂ
âcanât wait?â heâs indecent for sounding amused, but even that does nothing to stay his arousal; how eager you are simply makes him want you all the more. âokay, angel â since you asked so nicely.âÂ
a slight twinge of disappointment runs through him as he pulls his fingers out, but itâs quickly buried by the feeling he gets once he gives you a clear sweep of a once-over; how slutty you look, still half-dressed but already half-ruined, your thighs shaking in an effort to keep them open for him, the remnants of your last climax still leaking out of your hole. the sight of you has him so distracted that unbuttoning and unzipping his pants feels like a fever dream of an act; he barely notices what heâs doing until heâs already bare in front of you, and alertness has crawled halfway back into your consciousness as you push yourself up on your elbows to look at him.
âitâs soââ you have the decency to blush, though thereâs a pleased look on your face that tells him youâre not really embarrassed. âi didnât think youâd be this big.âÂ
âdoes that worry you?â
âiâve never had anyone⌠this big.â pride blooms in his chest â good, he thinks, because if he canât be as memorable as your first, then heâll take being the most in something as a prize. âi donât think â will it fit?â
âdoes it matter?â he chuckles, and your blush deepens. âno matter what â youâll take all of me in, wonât you?â
you chew on your bottom lip, as if considering your options, but to jeno, thereâs really only one choice â the correct one, and you make it when you nod your head.Â
âitâll feel good, though, you know,â he muses. his hand wrapped around his base, he lines himself up with you, the tip grazing against your folds. âeven better than just now.â
with just a little more pressure, he has his shaft flush against you; his girth sits against your slit, the tip pressed against your clit, and he starts to rock his hips â into his fist, against your cunt. your hips quiver, and a shiver runs through you as your pleasure spikes again, but he can tell it isnât enough. your bottom lip is back between your teeth, and your eyes are flitting between his face and his cock. jeno reaches out, eases your lip out from between your teeth, strokes it gently, almost tenderly.Â
âsay it,â he commands in a soft, silky voice.Â
âfuck me, jeno,â you breathe out, barely missing a beat. âfuck me, fuck my pussy, please.â
and if you ask that desperately, heâll waste no time; he draws his hips back, dragging his cock down until heâs aligned with your entrance. his eyes are trained on your face, even when he pushes in, so that he can take in your expression â the widening of your eyes as his tip breaches the first wave of resistance, the way your mouth falls agape as his fingers dig hard into your flesh. heâs never seen a prettier sight in his life.
âstretched you out already, but youâre still so fucking tight,â his voice is a soft, melodious croon, a stark contrast to the way heâs forcing past your tightness. âtight and wet, like a good girl.âÂ
âso big,â you whimper, your fingers stretched far enough to tickle the front of his shirt. âcanât â canât take it.âÂ
âof course you can, angel.â jeno doesnât give you the time to brace yourself fully before heâs rocking his hips in a little more sharply, his cock now halfway into you. your fingers curl into a little fist, immediately flying back to block the noise from your mouth. âah ah. donât get shy on me now; youâve been so noisy for me all this time.â
but he doesnât really mind the way you clap your palm over your mouth to muffle your high-pitched squeal as he thrusts in fully, the adjustment period after the last movement close to nothing; heâs too busy focusing on how good you feel around him, how warm and wet your insides are. this is heaven, easily, and jeno wants to stay here for as long as he can.Â
âgod, youâre fucking tight,â he repeats, an appreciatory gaze running over where youâre joined. his thumb stretches over your folds, rubbing them â something of an apology, perhaps, although all it does is stimulate you more, and you shiver at the extra contact. âhow deep is it, baby?â
âcan feel you here,â you mumble out, your small hand pressing just above your pelvis. he feels the tightness multiply as you place pressure, even just for a moment. âyour cockâs so much deeper than anyone else.âÂ
your hand falls away, limp, as he draws his hips back; you inhale, long and deep, before letting it out as a broken moan when he pushes back in. it drives him crazy, to start off this slow, when all he wants is to find a pace that has you sobbing, but the resistance of your pussy against his length isnât easy to ignore. jeno works you open, his jaw set and his grip tight against your frame, and it isnât long before heâs picking up speed, the slap of his flesh against yours fueling him exponentially, mingling with your cries, steadily increasing in volume.Â
âthatâs it. let everyone hear you,â he eggs on, his thumb now circling tight around your clit; your legs are quivering, threatening to close, but he keeps you steady, one arm wrapped around your thigh. his thrusts grow rougher, more deliberate, and when he looks up from where youâre joined back to your face, he sees your expression as a mixture of incredulity and ecstasy. a thin line of drool hangs from the corner of your mouth, your pretty pink lip gloss smeared, and fuck if he doesnât want to make sure you look like this every single time he comes over. âlet them know whoâs fucking you good, angel.â
âjâ jeno!â your voice hitches, lilts up as he presses in at a different, deeper angle, and he almost cums right then and there from the way your walls pulse around him. âyour cock feels so good, fucking me just rightâ more, god, moreââÂ
he complies without hesitation, gathering both your thighs and pushing them closer to your chest; you look even lewder like this, folded in half with your sopping cunt presented to him like itâs all his to take, and it is, isnât it? thereâs an increase in the intensity, the vigor in which he pumps his cock into you, and he knows heâs brushing repeatedly against your spot by the way youâre blubbering his name out in a way that suggests you sincerely think no one else in this building can hear you.Â
âthatâs my girl,â he hums approvingly, though thereâs a thickness in his voice that has him sounding a little more strained. âsuch a good girl, with your cunt all nice and sloppy for me. do you like it when i go this deep? does it feel good when i fuck you where no one else can?âÂ
âyes!â you sob out, your hands crumpling the end of your skirt up into tight fists. âjeno, iâ cum, i need to cum again, pleaseââ
âiâve got you, kitten,â his tone is reassuring, a stark contrast to the rigor of his hips. âdonât have to hang on for me, you know; always love seeing you fall apart.âÂ
âmâclose, so close ââÂ
âlet go, then,â he urges, his blunt nails digging into your flesh. âlet me feel that sweet cunt cum on my cock.âÂ
you comply without hesitation, though if youâd done it willingly, he canât really tell; he has to pin your hips down to stop you from bucking up and causing him to slip out, and you writhe against him as you sob in ecstasy, your walls fluttering before they clench. stray tears leak from your eyes, squeezed shut, and jeno wants nothing more than to eat you up like this â broken, fucked out.Â
youâre not even fully down from your high when he feels it â that sudden wrenching in his gut that tells him heâs about to follow suit. with a low groan, he peels your thighs apart again, lets you watch him as he bullies straight into your leaking hole. your voice is a staccato, punctuating every deep, sharp thrust into you, and itâs exactly to that melody that he wants to get off.Â
âtell me where you want it, angel.â he doesnât trust his voice, sharp and short as it is now. âshould i mark your pretty face? your stomach?â
âwant it against my pussy,â you whisper out, and jeno almost loses his mind as he watches you spread your folds apart with your forefinger and middle finger, inviting him. âmake a mess of it, sunbae.â
heâs barely able to pull out before heâs spilling against you; he ruts against your slit, coating your folds and the insides of your thighs in thick, creamy white. you hold your legs apart for as long as you can until they start to tremble, and he catches them and gently eases them down.Â
when you sit up to kiss him, youâre still demanding; he feels your hips rock closer, your sticky cunt pressing against the underside of his cock.
ânot enough,â you murmur against his lips, and jeno chuckles as you bind your hands around his neck.Â
âdonât worry, kitten,â he hums back. âweâve got all afternoon.â
#jeno x reader#jeno x you#jeno scenario#jeno scenarios#jeno imagines#jeno drabbles#jeno imagine#jeno drabble#jeno smut#nct x reader#nct dream x reader#nct dream x you#nct x you#nct drabbles#nct dream drabbles#nct dream imagines#nct imagines#nct scenarios#nct dream scenarios#nct smut
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ŕ§ăSLICE OF CAKEă( ě ěě° )
genreâfluff , established marriage , husband!wonwoo x wife!readerâââcwâfood mention (cake) , teasing , they're in love and make me feel single , not proofreadâââwcâ490ââârequestâ@k1eev for wonwoo + arms clasped around one's waist for the 3k eventââânoteâman i haven't written for svt in a while but this reminded me how insane i am for wonwoo ever since i wrote fire lord wonwoo. that fic truly changed me and my bias line. i hope you enjoy kie!!!ââânetâ@kstrucknet
âStop trying to run away. Come here.â Wonwooâs voice was gentle and steady as always, but there was a subtle hint of amusement in his tone that only you would pick up. His words made your body relax almost immediately and a small smile crept on your lips.
âWhy should I? You ate the last piece of cake,â you reminded him yet again, as if there was any possibility he would forget the fact with you reminding him every ten minutes the past hour.
âIâd buy you fifty cakes if thatâs what you wanted. Just come here,â he told you, holding out his arms, waiting for you to consider the offer. You were only dawdling to tease him. He looked awfully cute with his glasses perched on his nose and his slightly messy hair from his gaming headphones. He hadnât known you wanted the last piece of cake and had already apologized for it. He knew you were teasing him too, for just last week you had stolen food he had his eyes on as well.Â
So you relented, and padded over to him, allowing his arms to find their home on your waist. His touch was firm, portraying his clear intentions. He wasnât going to let you go until he had his fill. He hugged you close, lips right by your ear.
âDo you want me to buy you another cake?â he asked, and you giggled. He treated you too well.
âNo, love. Itâs okay. I donât want another cakeâ just want you to keep holding me.âÂ
âKeep holding you? I think I can do that,â he said, smiling wider now. His grip on your tightened ever so slightly, the comforting hug welcome. Feeling Wonwoo so close to you was everything you could ever want, and infinitely better than a slice of cake.
You snaked your arms around his waist as well to mirror the gesture, looking up at him with pure love in your eyes. He looked back down at you with nothing but the same feeling, and another gentle squeeze to your waist told you everything.Â
Your husband was a simple man, and it seemed like his only priority in life was to make sure you were happy. He did an excellent job at it, and you reminded him every day just how lucky you felt to have met him, fallen in love, and now be able to spend the rest of your life together. There was no better man you could have found, nor a better match for you than Wonwoo. Your perfect equal, even if he ate the last slice of cake sometimes.Â
âHow long do you want me to hold you?â he asked after a while. You looked like the last thing you wanted to do is make any moves to remove yourself from his arms.
âForever.â
âIâm afraid Iâm not so confident I can do that. But I can certainly try. Whatever my wife desires.â
svt taglist (bolded could not be tagged): @kangtaehyunzzz,, @eternalgyu,, @ddeonudepressions,, @hannahsophie0103,, @cham3li,,
@shuabby1994,, @icyminghao,, @98-0603,, @weird-bookworm,, @candewlsy,,
@wonwooz1,, @blossominghunnie,, @haecien,, @amara-mars,, @okshu,,
@parkjennykim,, @wootify,, @svtoose,, @seunghancore,, @ujisworld,,
@sobun1est,, @bananabubble,, @talkingsaxy,, @thesunsfullmoon,, @talking-saxy,,
@nicholasluvbot,, @cupidslovearrows,, @50-husbands,, @hursheys,, @gong-fourz,,
@nonononranghaee,, @forever-atiny,, @starshuas,, @raevyng,, @loserlvrss,,
@lexeees
#ficsăăâË°#eventsăăâË°#kstrucknet#wonwoo#jeon wonwoo#wonwoo x reader#jeon wonwoo x reader#seventeen#svt#svt x reader#seventeen x reader#wonwoo imagines#wonwoo scenarios#wonwoo fluff#wonwoo fic#svt imagines#svt scenarios#svt fluff#svt fic#seventeen imagines#seventeen scenarios#seventeen fluff#seventeen fic#kpop imagines#kpop scenarios
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ABOUT YOU | LUKE CASTELLAN
pairing: luke castellan x aphrodite!reader
request: luke x reader fluff w like an aphrodite!reader? reader is all sunshine and flowers and makes luke all soft/campers teasing luke abt the way reader changed him đ¤
word count: 1.6k
a/n: this is probably my favorite luke fic that i've written so far thank u so much anon for sending this request in! writing aphrodite!reader is so much fun, i'm such a sucker for the opposites trope. hope you all enjoy đ¤
You were the human embodiment of sunshine, a real life angel. Gentle, kind, and lovelyâ in other words, the complete and total opposite of Luke Castellan. He was dark and broody, strong and rough, and not totally unfriendly, but definitely intimidating.Â
But even if you werenât the daughter of Aphrodite, Luke believed that you would still be just as beautiful. There was something in the way you carried yourself that had made his heart surrender the second he laid eyes on you. You became the one and only exception in his long list of grievances.Â
So it came as no surprise to anyone at camp when the two of you started dating, just to the dismay of many of your admirers and a few of Lukeâs as well. If there was one thing you had in common, it was your beauty. With his puppy dog eyes and curly brown hair, Luke was a sight for sore eyes, almost as much as you were.Â
One day, you were walking hand in hand when one of the younger campers accidentally bumped into Luke. On any other occasion, Luke might have started an altercation, but today, he simply smiled and said, âJust be careful next time.â The camper stared at him, wide-eyed and shocked into place as you softly giggled.
âWhat?â he smiled, looking over at you as the kid took it as an opportunity to run away.Â
âNothing,â you mused. âJust that I think youâre getting soft, Luke Castellan.â You poked a finger at his chest playfully.Â
âWhat?â he shook his head. âNo, Iâm not.âÂ
Though he attempts to keep a serious face, you could see the amusement in his eyes. He often looked at you like this, ready to go along with anything you saidâ no matter how silly or whimsical your remarks.Â
âOkay, lover boy. Whatever you say,â you shrugged, offering him a kiss on his cheek that instantly causes color to rush into his face. Ignoring that heâs just proven your point, he attempts to hide his expression by seeking solace in the crook of your neck. He would never admit it to anyone, but he often thought his favorite place at camp was the spot in between your jaw and collarbone.Â
Even though most of the campers were still a little frightened by the idea of approaching Luke, his closest friends were not afraid to speak their minds.Â
âDude, youâre like, totally whipped for her,â Percy remarked over lunch once.Â
âAnd youâre like, totally fourteen years old,â Luke said.
âI think the fourteen year oldâs right,â Chris jumped in.
âDude! I thought you were supposed to have my back,â Luke throws up his arms in mock aggravation.
The two boys snickered, causing Luke to speak up again. âI am not whipped for Y/N.âÂ
âOh, sure,â Chris began. âSo the reason youâre practically skipping around camp and letting whatever team Aphrodite cabin is in win Capture the Flag is becauseâŚ?âÂ
âOh, and donât forget the constant checking his phone to see if she texted back and sharing his blanket with her at the campfire!â Percy pointed out. âMeanwhile, Iâm over here freezingâŚâÂ
âMaybe,â Luke scrambled to come up with an answer. âMaybe, I was just in a really good mood those days. It could have absolutely nothing to do with Y/N.âÂ
He barely believed the words himself, and Chris and Percy were certainly not convinced. Luke wasnât even sure why he felt the need to defend himself.Â
âDude, itâs okay if you are, sheâs literally your girlfriend,â Chris said.
âHey! I have an idea, letâs ask Annabeth!â Percy declared.
âAnnabeth? Why her?â Luke furrowed his brow.Â
âBecause, sheâs a girl. And sheâs known you the longest, she can give us a real answer,â Percy said matter-of-factly.Â
Luke thought it over. The young boy was technically right, Annabeth was like a little sister to him. If anyone could tell if he had changed since dating you, it would be her. This came as both a good and bad realization to him, because what if he had changed? Gods, was it that obvious?Â
Before he could agree to asking Annabeth, the young girl was already at their table. Percy must have called her over while Luke was thinking.Â
âWhatâs up?â she asked, sitting down across from him with her plate of food.Â
âOh, nothing, just talking about how soft Luke has gotten since he started dating Y/N,â Chris explained with a grin on his face.Â
âOh?â Annabeth said, seemingly amused.Â
âYeah, we actually wanted to get your opinion,â Percy continued. âWould you say you agree or disagree, that you know, Luke is nicer now that heâs with Y/N?â
Annabeth seemed to think it over for a second. âGods, you guys are such children,â she scoffed.Â
âThank you!â Luke cut in.
âI mean, all of you,â she looked at Luke pointedly. âWhy do you care what a bunch of kids think about you anyway? And not that it matters, but you, Castellan, are most definitely whipped for Y/N.âÂ
That shut Luke up immediately, and caused cheers to erupt from Chris and Percy, who were clapping each other on their backs as if they had just won Capture the Flag.Â
Annabeth smiled and shrugged her shoulders, as if to say âSorry, Luke. Itâs true.âÂ
Later that night, Luke snuck over to the Aphrodite Cabin to find you. You were surprised when Luke woke you up, it had been a while since he came seeking your comfort in the middle of the night. He used to have bad nightmares, but you noticed he had gotten better since you started dating. Youâd like to think it was because of you, but perhaps that would be thinking too highly of yourself. Â
In an effort to clear his mind, you suggested to go on a walk together. He agreed, and you climbed out of bed as quietly as you could.
You allowed him a few minutes of silence until his heavy breathing had slowed down and his grip on your hand had loosened.Â
âWhatâs on your mind, hon?â you asked softly.Â
Luke didnât respond at first, distracting himself by tracing the lines on the palm of your hand. You were happy to give him as much time as he needed, placing your other hand on his back and gently drawing circles.
After a while, he did speak up. âUhm, do you think that Iâm, like, unapproachable?âÂ
Your heart sank and you stopped in your tracks. âWhat makes you say that?âÂ
âI donât know, itâs just something thatâs been on my mind recently.âÂ
âLuke, is this about what I said to you the other day? Because I didnât mean it like thatââÂ
âNo, baby,â he rushed. The last thing he wanted was for you to think you had done something wrong. He wasnât sure that you could ever do wrong, not in his eyes. âI was just talking to Percy and Chris at lunch today and they were kind of teasing me.âÂ
You couldnât help but giggle at the thought of your boyfriend, Mr. Tough Guy, being teased by a few kids younger than him. âIâm sorry, babe. Continue,â you placed a supportive hand on his chest as you regained your composure.Â
âThey said that Iâve changed since we started dating.âÂ
Though you were an expert in human emotion, there were still times you couldnât read the expression on Lukeâs face. You couldnât tell if he thought of this as a bad thing, or if he was just curious to see what you thought. You decided on the latter. âChanged how so?âÂ
âThey think Iâm soft now because Iâm always in a good mood and stuffâŚâ he trailed off. Even now, in the dark of the night, you could tell he was blushing.
âWell,â you started, trying to find the right words. âYou know, I was just teasing you the other day, babe. I think youâve always been this way.âÂ
âWhat do you mean?âÂ
âI mean, I think youâve always been a giant teddy bear,â you grinned, unable to contain yourself. âLuke, youâre not as bad as everyone thinks you are.âÂ
By now, both of you had stopped walking. Ever since Luke arrived at camp, he had been characterized as the tough, stony, and slightly antagonistic guy. All because of a scar he carried and the stories of what he had gone through with Annabeth and Thalia. Many people were still intimidated by him, despite his position as the counselor in Hermes and his job to welcome newcomers. It had been so long, he wasnât sure if this was the way he was, or the way that he was made to be.Â
As if reading his thoughts, you said, âYou donât have to be what they tell you to be. Do you know the words I use to describe you when someone asks me about you?âÂ
Unable to speak, Luke simply shook his head.Â
âGentle, kind, and lovely.âÂ
Luke wasnât sure what he was expecting, but certainly nothing close to the words you had chosen. âYou do not,â he objected.Â
âI'm serious, baby,â you placed your hands on his cheeks and pulled him in until your foreheads were touching. âI think youâre the most wonderful and caring guy Iâve ever met. I think you always have been, you just donât always show it.â
He stared at you intently before pulling a loose strand of hair out of your face. You kissed the top of his head, âI must be one lucky girl.âÂ
âHey, if thereâs one thing Iâm sure about, itâs that Iâm the lucky one,â he said, before pulling you in for a kiss.Â
#luke castellan#luke castellan x reader#percy jackson series#percy jackson#pjo#charlie bushnell#charlie bushnell x reader#luke castellan imagine#percy jackson x reader#pjo x you#luke castellan x you
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Fall for Me
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Female Reader Summary: Bucky doesn't think he's good enough for you, but still wishes he could be your guy. Word Count: Over 1.4k Warnings: Longing, insecurities, "just friends" (for now), Steve is a good friend, slight feels (it's me), Bucky Barnes (he's a warning, okay?). A/N: We'll call this a Friday Feels inspired by a nonnie.â¤ď¸ Not beta read and written on my phone, so any and all mistakes are my own. Please follow @navybrat817-sideblog for new fics and notifications. Comments, reblogs, feedback are loved and appreciated!
It was a special kind of torture for Bucky to watch the person he loved flirt with someone else.
To be fair, he couldn't say for sure that you were flirting. Being friendly? Yes. You had a warm and welcoming personality, the kind he was drawn to the moment you two crossed paths months ago. One of the things he loved about you was how genuine you were. It was only natural that you pulled others in as well. Your compassion, charm, beauty, everything called to him.
You were the whole package, inside and out.
âWhat the hell am I doing here?â He muttered. He hadn't wanted to go to the bar, but Steve assured him it was a hole-in-the-wall sort of place. Not a lot of patrons on a night like this. Somewhere no one would bother them. He added at the last second that you were going.
Bucky grabbed his leather jacket to go as soon as those words left Steveâs mouth.
Instead of having a drink with you like he wanted or just talking, he simmered in silence in a booth while you stood at the bar. He narrowed his eyes as the guy you were talking to moved an inch closer. A bit too close for his liking.
Steve said his name was Will. They had met each other at some point in passing. Short blonde hair and a trimmed beard. Ex-military, but still built like he had a war to fight. Behind the guyâs blue eyes lurked pain, guilt, and regret that most would miss due to his general stoic demeanor. Bucky could relate all too well to horrors that haunted even the strongest of men.
But when Will looked at you, his eyes lit up. They held a sense of longing. Hope.
Once again, Bucky could relate all too well because that was how he looked at you.
âYouâre doing that staring thing again,â Steve said, grabbing a beer from the bucket and setting it down in front of him. âJust talk to her.â
Bucky took a swig, but didn't take his eyes off you. He was afraid if he looked away that Will might convince you to leave with him. âTalk to her about what?â
His best friend sighed. âYou know what.â
Steve knew how he felt about you. Talking about his feelings wasn't easy, but he had to tell his best friend. And it wasn't the first time Steve encouraged him to speak up. He said you had the right to know so the two of you could figure out how to move forward, whether as a couple or just friends, instead of dancing around it.
But how could Bucky admit how he felt when he didn't deserve someone like you?
âThereâs nothing to talk about,â he said.
âBullshit.â
âWe're friends,â Bucky stated. The words tasted as bitter as the beer he sipped. No, not bitter. He couldn't feel that way just because he had a piece of you when he wanted all of you.
Was he selfish for that?
He nearly shattered the bottle in his hand when you giggled at whatever Will said. Something akin to jealousy settled in his chest and he had no right to feel that way. The two of you weren't together. You were single and didn't owe him a thing.
But he knows if you gave him a chance, heâd treat you well. Better than any other guy before him. He would do his best to make you happy. Maybe that wasn't enough.
âWill is a good guy, but he isn't you, Buck. Youâre still one of the best guys I know,â Steve said.
âYou don't have to kiss my ass, punk,â he muttered, immediately regretting it. He was only trying to help and God knows he had done more than enough for him over the years.
Steve shook his head. âAnd you don't have to feel sorry for yourself, jerk.â
âIâm not,â he whispered. Maybe he was. He was sorry for so many things.
As if you sensed his sadness, you looked over your shoulder and met his gaze. You smiled at him, the kind of smile that stole the very breath from his lungs and made his head spin. He wanted to believe it was a smile you reserved only for him. And the softness in your beautiful eyes, he imagined he could see his future in them.
Could you see the endless love he had for you in his?
His heart ached when you turned away and put your hand on Willâs arm. Of course, you were attracted to the guy. Why wouldnât you be? The thought of you kissing him though, being intimate with him? He felt sick enough to finally look away.
Bucky glanced at his distorted reflection in the beer bottle. A long time ago, he would've called himself handsome. Not because he was full of himself, but because he knew himself then. He knew how to walk the line between confidence and cockiness. He was full of life and wonder once. Now the weight of his sins showed in how he carried himself.
Sins you never judged him for.
âJamie? Are you okay?â
Steve nudged him, snapping him out of his thoughts. He was so lost in his mind that he hadnât heard you call out to him. He shouldâve known since you were the only one who called him Jamie. When he looked up from his seat, he saw that you were no longer standing next to Will as he was still at the bar. And there was nothing but concern in your gaze as you set your drink down on the table.
âWhat? What happened?â He asked, not smooth at all.
Your eyes flickered to Steve and then back at him. âI asked if youâre okay. You donât look too well.â
âNot feeling so great,â he said, which wasnât a lie. âThis placeâŚâ
âOh,â you said, sliding into the booth beside him. He inhaled, your sweet scent soothing the pain in his heart and making it race all at once. âWell, why donât we head out? Thereâs no reason to stay if you donât want to stay.â
He gently smiled. You were always willing to go with the flow and change plans if things ever got too loud or too much for him. âIâm fine. Besides, you just got your drink and you havenât had a chance to play pool with Sam or Natasha,â he argued. He didnât want to spoil your night.
You put your hand on his arm, but it seemed different than when you touched Willâs arm. This was tender, soothing. âIf being here is making you uncomfortable, then I donât feel like sticking around. Theyâll understand. Steve, please, back me up on this.â
âSheâs right. You two should go,â Steve said, conveniently leaving himself and the others out of the equation.
Bucky spared Will a glance, who was now talking to the guys he went into the bar with. He swallowed hard before the next words left his mouth. âWhat about your new friend?â
âYou are my friend, Jamie,â you said. He winced inwardly at the reminder. Friends. You were just friends. âDonât worry about him. Letâs just go. How about a movie at your place? Something low-key so you feel better.â
âYou sure?â He asked, wondering just how eager he looked to leave with you.
âIâm sure,â you smiled, making his heart warm again.
âOkay. You convinced me,â he said. Not that it wouldâve taken much. Your smile could bend the will of just about anyone.
âYou know, I hear healthy conversations are also good to help people feel better,â Steve chimed in, earning an elbow to the side from Bucky.
You raised an eyebrow and slid out of the booth. âYeah. Sure. Jamie and I can have a healthy conversation and you all enjoy the rest of the night.â You offered Bucky a hand to help him out. He didnât want to let go. âCâmon. We have a movie waiting for us.â
âYes, maâam,â Bucky teased, proud of himself when you giggled.
Steve gave him an optimistic smile and he couldnât help but return it. He wasnât sure if Will had given you his number or if you planned to see him, but maybe heâd take a chance and tell you he had fallen for you. Maybe, if he was lucky, you had fallen for him, too.
Just maybe.
And maybe, just maybe, this could be a thing? Did Will give you his number? Will Bucky say how he feels? What's going to happen? Love and thanks for reading! â¤ď¸
Masterlist â Bucky Barnes Masterlist â Ko-Fi
#navybrat writes#bucky barnes#bucky barnes x reader#bucky barnes x female reader#bucky barnes x f!reader#bucky barnes x fem!reader#bucky barnes x you#bucky barnes x y/n#x reader#bucky barnes fluff#bucky barnes fanfiction#bucky barnes fic#james buchanan barnes#sebastian stan#bucky fic#bucky x reader#bucky x female reader#bucky barnes imagine#sebastian stan x reader#the winter soldier
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Rouge est perdue (Ëľ â˘Ě á´ - Ëľ ) â§
Roommate!Ellie who is a pervđ
đ. ° .⢠.đ .⢠° . đ . ° .⢠.đ
I remember somebody writing something like this but Iâve no idea who Ëâ Ë. This is literally a complete 180 from my previous fic LMAOđ itâs been over a year since Iâve written just pure smut,, idk if this is good or not but whatever.
C/w: FILTHY smut. Porn w a bit of plot. No use of Y/N. Fingering (both receiving). Pillow humping. dom!reader & sub!ellie. Kinda loser!ellie? Ellie is a perv but still needs consent >â˘<. Squirtingđ.
W/c: 2.7k
~ đ. ° .⢠.đ .⢠° . đ . ° .⢠.đ
âHeyyy Ellie? This is gonna sound weird,,, but like,, do you know where any of my underwear is?â
You feel so fucking weird asking your roommate this question. After all, itâs just so embarrassing, and youâve looked EVERYWHERE. If you didnât know where it is⌠she definitely didnât. I mean, the dryer eats up your socks all the time. Probably happens to Ellie too. Surely youâre not the only one with garments missing.
Ellie shifts a little on her feet, âWhat do ya mean?â She looks at you with those damn puppy dog eyes she loves to use, and you swear youâre not crazy when your stomach does the flip thing.
You try not to look her in the eye, âNot really bras but more like⌠panties?â
âOhhh okay. Ya I understand. Oh but no- havenât seen any that arenât mine.â She says nonchalantly while walking away.
You blink at her, âOh! well thanks anyway.â You shrug your shoulders as you walk back into your room.
~
She had promised herself only a couple pairs. Maximum 3. She tried to be smart about it - sheâd take one pair of each kind you had. That way it wouldnât look so suspicious, instead of only your pretty Victoriaâs Secret thongs going missing. One pair of briefs, one pair of bikinis,,, and of course her favorite thong of yours.
This whole⌠obsession⌠we can say, started on the second day the two moved in together. You two were sitting on the couch after youâd spent way too long lugging it inside together. You were texting your friends on your phone as she turned on the tv to some dinosaur channel. Ellie couldnât stop sneaking glances of you - your body and what you were wearing. She flashed her eyes down and saw this absolutely gorgeous pair of red panties peek out from under your leggings. Seeing you in those almost made her drop the remote. Why would you be wearing something like that? Who were you trying to impress?
From what she could tell from rummaging through your things when you moved in yesterday, you were single. In fact, you basically had lay it all out beautifully for her. All your bras, underwear, tights and sex toys were all in the same box. She licked her lips, no girl getting some good head at the moment would need a clit sucking vibrator. It all came together when she casually mentioned her last girlfriendâs around you, and she had to turn away to smile when you mentioned you like girls too.
Now, Ellie had this habit. Whenever youâd go out with your friends or off to work, sheâd waltz into her bedroom, lock the door (to be safe), and dig down deep in her underwear drawer until she found your own panties. She carefully had them hidden inside her own boxers, there was basically no way you could ever find them. Not like you would search her room without permission anyway, she knew you. And of course she didnât really steal them⌠she was borrowing them. She planned on returning them whenever she felt like it⌠whenever that might be.
~
Today Ellie went through her usual routine of waiting five minutes after you left, going into her room, and grabbing the red thong. She sighed and bit her lip. It was almost as pretty as you.. silk with soft mesh, see through basically everywhere except for where your pussy would lay. She played with the red bow on top, âThis is so fucking stupid.â She thought to herself.
Ellie pressed her lips together, reaching into her shorts and palming herself over her boxers. She sighed immediately, letting out a soft âfuuuckkkkâ as her eyes fluttered shut.
Sheâd been waiting about two weeks since she snagged your thong to fuck herself with it. Yeah, she was really fucking horny for you, but she wanted to draw it out as long as she could.
She hummed to herself, âMmmmm,, need more..â she sat down on her bed and took her shorts off. She inspected the panties once more, as if she hadnât done that one hundred times already. Just by feeling them she could tell they were new. Maybe you were feeling confident about your new life youâve started. New job, new roommate, new panties. She was absent-mindedly rocking her hips back and forth during this, thinking about how youâd look wearing them while laying on her bed.
She finally took off her boxers and dipped her fingers into her pussy. Her mouth opened a little, she was wetter than she thought sheâd be. âMmhh okay,â she sighs, âThasâ better.â Ellie brought her wet fingers up to her throbbing clit, just touching it, not even rubbing circles like how she desperately needed to. She couldnât take it and whimpered, pushing her fingers onto herself harder as punishment. She felt her clit fluttering faster each second she held her fingers there.
She suddenly stopped , getting up to grab a pillow. She situated it in between her legs. âOkay..â she sighed, slowly lowering herself onto it. She began rocking her hips back and forth again, knitting her eyebrows together. It felt so much fucking better than humping nothing, especially considering how firm the edge of the pillow was.
She kept going, making her movements faster, but she quickly grew annoyed as her shirt would become tucked underneath herself as she rides the pillow. Grunting, she quickly pulled the shirt off, completely bare and naked except for her black sports bra. She hastily grabbed your red panties and lost her mind humping the pillow. She whimpered and started to let out small, quiet moans as her actions grew more and more desperate.
âY-yesss.. hah- so good.. fuck me, more pleassssseâŚâ Ellie could feel that familiar tightness at her core start to arise.
~
As you approached the door to your appartement with your huge grocery haul in both hands, you heard the tv playing. You shook your head and smiled to yourself, âUgh Ellieâs always turning the tv up way too loud.. gonna get noise complaints soon.â You thought.
Quickly stepping inside, you set all the grocery bags down on the counter and walked to the living room to tell Ellie to turn down the tv. However, as soon as you walked in there was no Ellie, only the tv turned up and on some channel you knew Ellie didnât even watch. You raised an eyebrow but shook it off. She was probably invited somewhere last minute and, knowing Ellie, probably threw something on and ran out the door without turning off any lights or the tv.
You grabbed the remote from off the couch and watched the channel for a few seconds before deciding to click the power off button. The very second you turned off the tv, you werenât greeted by silence, but by Ellieâs voice doing something you never thought youâd hear: moaning.
Your whole face suddenly grew red, and you felt your stomach drop. Your mind began to race: Holy shit. Sheâs fucking someone in there. Why is she doing that today. Ohmygod I never said I was going to the store. She probably thought I was going to work and would be out for hours. Fuck. Fuck. Why is she fucking that girl and not me? No- fuck thatâs wrong. I canât think that about my roommate I barley know! Ohmygod I thought that when she said she was single she meant like- she didnât even do one night stands. Oh fuck me in the fucking ass-
Suddenly, your rapid stream of thoughts were cut off by Ellie moaning your name.
âMmmhhhmm.. hahhh fuck right there baby. Yes.. yes Iâm such a fuckinâ slut for you.â You hear her whine and fucking whimper. Your eyes grew as wide as balloons and you immediately dropped your purse on the couch. You take off your shoes so youâre not as loud, and sneak over to Ellieâs room where her door is closed.
You feel so fucking awkward you donât know what to do. Maybe you felt a little more horny than awkward however, because suddenly you notice yourself squeezing your thighs together and shifting on your feet.
âFuck it.â You thought. You reach for the door handle but stop as you go to turn it, second guessing yourself. Is this really right? Well I mean, sheâs the one masturbating to you and moaning your name⌠soâŚ
You turn the handle and slowly open the door. It creaks a little, causing Ellie to jump and freeze in place. The only thing you can manage to say is âHolyyyyy fuck.â Your super fucking hot ass tatted up roommate is riding her own pillow with your own red thong in hand moaning your own name. You feel like you canât even breathe.
âOhmygod wait-â Ellie starts, trying her best to hunch over and cover herself with the pillow, âOkay fuck Iâm really sorry I didnât even think youâd be home fuckingfuckmegoddammit I even turned on the tv super loud so no one would hear me and if I heard it turn off I would know you came back but ohmyfuckinggod I didnât hear it go silent imsofuckingsorry-â
You cut off her rambling of explanations and apologies, âHeyyyy, EllieâŚ?â You slowly take off your jacket and shirt, trying your very best to be sensual, but this was never your forte. âYou didnât finish⌠right?â You slowly look up at her.
âWha-? What? Why are you asking me-â
âYou didnât answer me.â You interrupt her. Your eyes become half lidded as you feel yourself becoming more confident. âDid you finish? Yes or no, Els.â
Ellie suddenly blushes at the nickname, âNo.â she whispers with wide eyes, looking right at you.
âLet me help you then.â
âFuck- please.â
Thatâs all the consent you need before you practically leap onto her, kissing her ravenously. The kiss quickly becomes sloppy and desperate, you pull away quickly to get some air, âFuck. Been wanting to do that since I moved in.â Without letting Ellie respond, you latch yourself onto her neck, kissing and taking in her scent that you love so much.
âMmmph- pleaseâŚâ She whimpers, quite pathetically. âCanât wait baby..â
You smile at the pet name, kissing her deeply again as your hands explore her toned body.
You swear itâs only ten seconds more and she breaks away, whispering âI-I need you.â
âOh I fucking know.â
Ellie watches you, eyes unfaltering as you plant kisses down her chest, toned abs, all the way down to her pussy.
Without warning, you start sliding a finger in, âWanna see how loose you are.â You mutter to yourself. You donât know why youâre even shocked when you easily push inside of her, deciding to slip another finger in.
Ellie moans immediately, grinding her hips rapidly down onto your hand. She throws her head back and her moans become louder, quicker. Suddenly, something red to the right of Ellie catches your eye as youâre finger fucking her. You were so tunnel visioned, ready to fuck her, that you completely forgot about your missing panties. The panties that she stole. You keep your eyes locked on your underwear as you speed up, as Ellie starts whining, basically crying about how sheâs âGonna cum soon.â
You can feel her g-spot so easily.
âYeah? Youâre gonna fucking tell me you took it or youâre not gonna cum. Use your words.â You instruct, never slowing down your pace.
Ellie gasps, she canât even pretend she doesnât know what youâre talking about, âYeah. Y-Yes I fucking took it. Mmm- wanted to see⌠needed you so bad.. aaaaahh..â she stammers out and you never stopped fucking her desperate little pussy, occasionally moaning in response to what she tried to say.
Finally getting the confession you needed, you curled your fingers up inside of her. âFuck- Iâm gonna cum Iâm gonna cum.. gonnacumbabyyyâŚâŚâ
âCum for me, Ellie.â
She finally does, finally gets to cum after everything thatâs happened. She gasps rapidly.
You talk her through her orgasm, saying things like, âThatâs it Ellie.â âGod youâre so fucking beautiful.â
As soon as she was done squirming, Ellie grabs your face and kisses you deeply. She sits the two of your up and slides her knee in between your thighs. You were so turned on, you swear you could cum just from doing this. It seems as though Ellie understood exactly what you wanted, because she swiftly flips you over onto your back and starts unbuttoning your pants.
You laugh, suddenly getting an idea, âWait, wait. Turn around and cover your eyes, Els.â
Sheâs skeptical, raising an eyebrow but complies anyway. After all, you just gave her the best orgasm sheâs probably ever had. She hears shuffling for a few seconds, and the zipper of your pants coming undone as you drop them to the floor.
âTadaaaa!â You exclaim, signaling to Ellie that itâs okay if she turns around.
You swear Ellieâs eyes have never been wider as she sees you wearing nothing but that damn red thong.
She almost drools, âHolyyyyy shiiiitttttt..â and slowly walks over to you, grabbing your waist with her sexy ass hands. âEven better than I was imagining.. need to fuck you right now okay..?â She mutters, mostly to herself, as sheâs still too distracted feeling up how the red silk hugs your body.
âBeen ready for so long, Els.â You say as you crawl back onto the bed, trying to break her out of her spell.
Ellie climbs on top of you and plays with your nipples, kissing and biting your neck at the same time. You whimper - thatâs definitely going to leave marks in the morning. Only after a few seconds her hands leave your chest, moving lower to peel away the red fabric and reveal your dripping pussy.
She gasps, staring for a few moments at how beautiful you are. âFuck, so so pretty.â She cracks her knuckles, âGod, youâre already so wet for me⌠Iâm gonna stretch you out baby, lemme know if you hurt âmkay?â
You whine in response, feeling the butterflies in your stomach erupt as she effortlessly slides two fingers in. You gasp as she starts moving, then slowly picking up the pace until sheâs basically slamming into your g-spot.
âOhhh.. f-fuck me.â
Ellie pants as she pumps her gorgeous fingers in and out of you, âThatâs jusâ what Iâm doinâ baby.â She smirks. Suddenly, she adds one more finger and brings her thumb up to rub your clit, and you almost scream.
It only takes a little more and youâre already on edge. She can feel you clenching around her. Youâre so close. She hisses sharply, sucking in the air through her teeth as you take her, âFuck, see my tattoo moving as I fuck you hon?â She pants, âDoinâ so good for me like this.â
âI- I think Iâm gonna cum soon..â You whimper and your legs start shaking. âAhh,, fuck Ellie-!!â
âGo on baby, you can cum.â
With just that little bit of motivation, you finally have the orgasm youâve so desperately wanted. Itâs so intense as she keeps fucking you senseless, you feel yourself squirt, which almost never happens, the warm fluid surprising you. You cover your face with your hands, so embarrassed that your body is doing this for Ellie. She hushes you, letting you know itâs okay.
You know youâre finally done when you throw your head back, trying to catch your breath. Ellie flops down beside you, smiling at you and waiting for the right time to say something.
âSo, wanna like⌠be my girlfriend now?â She says, absolutely way too nonchalantly.
You look at her and laugh, slapping her arm playfully, âYou literally made me see stars, Ellie! Gimme a second!!â
She throws her hands up in the air. âSorry, sorry! Just couldnât wait.â You both giggle.
You turn over on your side, kissing her cute little nose, âYeah.. yeah thatâd be nice.â
You smile and Ellieâs face lights up, she quickly plants fast kisses all over your face. âMy hot roommate wants to date me!!â She exclaims. You laugh and she pulls you in closer, hugging her arms around you.
She reaches over to turn off the lamp, and the two of you drift off to sleep.
âĄ
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