#sunny’s weird little freak guys

[omorinintendoswitchedition]

hi guys. can I show you my weird little freak guy. his name is franky and it’s been 3 years since he’s spoken to another human being. and also he has a virus. which is why he looks fucked up.

[simplyreveries]

I don't know if someone has already requested this, but can I request the first years with GN!Reader who always falls asleep in weird places like on a tree branch, in the closet, under the table, or in the middle of the field, etc.? So the boys have to carry them back to Ramshackle Dorm.

ace trappola

at first, he was confused and even shocked at your strange ability to feel comfortable enough to sleep practically anywhere but of course it turns into him snickering and laughing whenever he catches you. he'd nudge deuce and tell him you're doing it again. he seriously could've died laughing and had to hold it in when he saw riddles frustrated and confused expression when you were passed out asleep underneath a table after an unbirthday party.

it comes to a point where he doesn't seem fazed or concerned if you're missing from class or something- he'd probably shake his head playfully and think you're just off sleeping somewhere unusual. he'd go off to find you most of the time. doesn't know how to wake you up, he's a, (loving) ass but he likes to stack random things on you either until you wake up or it falls. he's gotten in trouble multiple times for which in class. he'll call you a "sleepyhead" and sometimes tries to fool you and tell you you've slept through the whole day-!

much to his surprise,,, during an instance where you're just too hazy and too tired to be fully there. he groans and resorts to helping you back to ramshackle having you lazily use him as some support when walking back together. he'd tease and tell you you're lazy- but ace has never left your side when it's getting late, and he needs to wake you up or help you get back to ramshackle with the help of deuce.

deuce spade

ok not going to lie he's a little concerned. he's literally wondering how you manage to remain perfectly fine and unharmed when you somehow fall asleep int he most inconvenient and even dangerous spots. he's usually nervous and has a look of worriedness for you. deuce literally never felt more confused and SCARED when you fell asleep once inside the alchemy room... it's just waiting for disaster with mishaps in there.

deuce felt unsure if he should wake you up half of the time and when he does try it's too light of shaking or too quiet of talking to do anything. around that time ace or grim try suggesting splashing water on your face. he'd immediately figure out how to wake you up as soon as they mention that.

the time when he visited ramshackle and found you curled up in front of the steps asleep (doesnt matter how many times he's used to this he still is freaked out a bit akjshjhksk) he'll probably end up asking the ghosts for help in getting you back inside... it's almost dark too! he worries at the thought if he hadn't come over. doesn't really scold you but nervously does try to remind you to be more careful-! the last thing he wants is for you to end up getting hurt yourself because of this unique quirk of yours.

jack howl

the first time he witnessed this was an... experience, he was in the middle of track, and you were just sprawled out laying in the grass in a sunny spot. at first, he thought you were resting maybe... not actually fully asleep. he kinda just stares and tries to figure out in his head only for grim to tell him "...ya this is normal for them".

jack gets concerned like deuce and genuinely doesn't know what to do. he wants to help you but not abruptly wake you up. so, in other times where he finds you doing it again and again- he gets kind of used to it by now and doesn't seem to question it. he silently does make sure you're fine. like that one time you were peacefully asleep on a bleacher, and he quickly had to catch and stop you before you quite literally ROLLED off. you have this poor guy sweating.

though, in another time when its getting late and knows you should be back at ramshackle, he huffs and prompts to bringing you back there himself - a little annoyed by grim's snicker and climbing onto his shoulder but he does seem to make sure to look out for you. jack just prays you don't wake up, so you won't have something to tease him about later on...

epel felmier

epel silently stared for a few seconds in shock, letting himself slip cursing slightly in confusion. he regains his composure and doesn't bother waking you up if you seem- alright? he seemed to tell ace and deuce about it and they were already used to this, ace only laughed.

he panicked slightly as he found you sleeping on the floor in pomefiore once- vil would not be impressed or happy to see that and give you and probably him some small lecture. or when he found you sleeping on the steps inside the school?? does your back not feel pain?? those are times he'd actually try to wake you up, even if it took him a few attempts.

he does take it upon himself to help you get back to ramshackle, when you're not too far from it yet still managed to fall asleep right by the gate. he found grim complaining and trying to wake you up, with no luck with his paws. like ace would, grim would have you lean on him groggy and tried and he'd help bring you to ramshackle, sighing but he started to even laugh at the whole ridiculousness of it all when he's telling you to be more careful outside.

sebek zigvolt

initially, he didn't even notice you fall asleep as he loudly going on about something. he was a little shocked at first but quickly didn't hesitate to wake you up, claiming with his booming voice that it was improper at school and dangerous...! "and i thought silvers sleeping habits were terrible...!"

he is a knight (in training) and is keen with good senses and quick reactions- so like with jack, if you're literally about to fall or roll in your sleep when your off asleep in some crazy spot he'll swiftly move and stop you. grumbling how unusual it is. and he would never admit it, but you did once startle him when he found you sleeping in a tucked area, he literally reached for his magic pen. would die if you found out and deny it profusely.

it doesn't matter with all the scolding... sebek does help you. and like all the other times wouldn't dare to admit it and his slight soft spot for you. after a few failed attempts at waking, you he'd make sure you get to ramshackle himself, which is no sweat for someone like him. he couldn't believe you were sleeping outside for so long it was starting to rain!

[rheiple]

He's Super Shy, Super Shy

-OneShot

▪︎SUMMARY↦ You’d think he’s avoiding you, but if he is then why is he watching you?

▪︎WARNING/s↦ None

▪︎CHARACTER/s↦ Moon, Reader, lil bits of Sun

▪︎WORD COUNT↦ 1769

▪︎AUTHOR'S NOTE��� This Fic is inspired by the song called “Talk to you” by Ricky Montgomery. You should check out his other songs to, it’s such a banger!!

There he goes again, leaving him to talk to you.

Moon, as quiet as a mouse, lifted himself up with his trusty hook and stayed at the ceiling. He observed how his Sunny counter part keeps chatting your ears off. You don’t seem to mind though, even butting in sometimes to speak out your thoughts.

He lets out a quiet sigh. He admires Sun, being able to socialize with anyone, and everyone liking his extroverted personality. He may be a clean freak, but he’s also very creative. Having no trouble to talk to anyone with anything on his mechanical mind. He likes that.

He also wished he had that ability.

At first, he didn’t really care. He had no one to talk to besides his other half. Almost everyone is scared to talk to him, much less even be in his presence. It stings, but just a little bit. It’s not like socializing is a necessity anyways.

His ruby eyes scanned your unique features. Unintentionally saving every detail to his data bank.

You… You make it seem like a need.

He noticed that your quite a chatter box whenever you “talk" to him during his repairs. The first time he met you. When he accidentally fell really high up, because his cable snapped. He had to shut down his body to save some energy. However he could still hear whatever's happening to his surroundings. He could also feel sensations, able to identify something that touched him. He felt like he had what you humans call a ‘coma’.

At first he was angered at being rough handled by a bunch of sweaty, and possibly grimy old hands. Getting strapped at what he knows is the cylinder repair station. He heard them talking, more so complaining about their job. But then they eventually got out.

It was silent for a moment, until a sound of someone entering the chamber ruined the quietness.

He didn’t expected to have gentle hands cupping his face.

He surprised himself that he welcomed the feeling of their soft and warm palms.

“Oh you poor guy. I’ll get you fixed in no time!”

He wanted to follow their hands again. He heard clicks and clanks of tools they needed to use. He felt their hands on his chest plate, opening up his case to replace it.

He didn’t really knew what happened after that. Floating in and out of consciousness because he was almost out of energy. He wanted to save up just so he could at least see you and maybe meet you again sometime. He could only bask in to your careful touch.

Time flies so fast he noticed. He was instantly greeted with darkness when he gained control on his body. He looks at the human responsible of fixing him.

….Hmm, how peculiar.

He’d never seem you before, are you perhaps a new hire? He doesn’t have your information yet. Are you only a mechanic that they called in?

He gave his face plate a little spin. And he sees you grinning triumphantly at the action. With your hands on your hips and your chest puffed up, you proudly boasted about your handiwork. You introduced yourself to him. Funny human. Why bother telling him your name, isn’t he just a bot to you? You even held out your hand for him to shake.

You’re strange. But he likes it for some reason. Maybe it’s because he is also weird.

He amused you by shaking your hand, and telling you his name.

“Moon huh? Classic name.”

“..Thank you..”

A ringtone emits from your best pocket. He turned his face plate upside down.

He waited for you to bid your goodbye to someone on the phone. And you looked at him with a smile. “Well Moon, you’re good to go! You’re cable is already getting worked on. I hope to see you around!”

He watched you left him for the outside.

He needed to know, after encountering you he waited and waited, hoped even to get to meet you again. Every time you enter this Plex he observed you during his free time. He wanted to know if you remembered what you told him. But did you even remembered him? He hoped so.

There are times you take a glance inside the Daycare. And he would be also there, but he’s hiding from you instead of approaching you, like what his brother self is doing.

He doesn’t understand himself. Why is he hesitant on approaching you? Is it because he’s afraid? Of what exactly, you’re the one who had the guts to act casual with him on your first meeting. So why?

Now that he thought hard about it, he… Didn’t know what to say if he were to come up at you. He doesn’t think you’d appreciate it if he just, stared at you. What do people say to start conversations? How’s the weather down there? Real nice.

He decided, it’d be much better to just admire you from afar like right now to save the both of you from his awkwardness.

He looks at Sun with a slight frown. While he admired his alter self, he also couldn’t help but envy him at the same time. He was given the ability to be a natural talker, he wished that they could’ve just have the same personality chip, so instead of watching the two of you he’d be also there at the table. Chatting along with you two.

He saw you bidding farewell, the other doing at same, but with a hug. His hands twitched, wanting to hug you like he did.

The solar animatronic went to the Daycare, and the lunar bot followed suit.

Upon opening the Daycare doors, He called out to him to come down the ceiling. He obliged as they noticed that the Daycare is in a messy state.

He focused on wiping down the kiddie tables with a clean wet range while he stacked up those big cylinder blocks. “So… when are ya stop acting like creep and start talking to them like a normal person?”

Moon clicked his tongue in annoyance. “I don’t appreciate being insulted.”

“Oh c'mon! But you know it’s true! Aren’t you tired of waiting for them to come up to you to talk to you? Make the first move! All you have to do is greet them, ask how they’ve been, and then ask about whatever you want to know about them. It’s easy as one, two, three – even a toddler would be able to follow!”

He grumbled, tucking in the chair. “Not as easy as you think it is…”

Sun lets out a tired sigh. “I could help you by introducing you to them, but then I’ll leave you two be. I’ll watch over you two from afar, to coach you up if you think you need help! How does that sound Moonie?”

The moon lets out a thoughtful hum. He, wasn’t sure if he’ll be able to do well. But he supposes it’s better than just watching. Going out of his comfort zone doesn’t sound so bad if it means being able to be friends with you.

He decided, rather than letting fate decide he’ll control it, just to meet you soon.

.

.

.

He can’t do it.

He’ll just let fate decide when you two could meet again, he wouldn’t mind waiting for years to happen. He’s a patient bot, he has the patience of a saint just for you.

He could feel the force from his back, that force being Sun trying to push him towards you. Who’s currently eating at one of the benches at the cafeteria.

Sun grunted in annoyance. “hngg, it’s now or never Moonie. Just go talk to them already!”

He pushed himself back just as harder. “You told me you’ll introduce me to them!...” He whispered yelled.

“I have to go help Vanessa- to-to locate a lost kid at arcade!”

“..Let’s switch..”

With all his might, he put all of his energy into pushing him. ”No!..Yo-you go talk to them..now!”

…

You saw him walking towards you. Well, it wasn’t really walking, it’s like someone pushed him towards you. You didn’t see who it was, but you guessed it was another animatronic. There’s no way a human would be able to push him that hard.

He sees your eye widen. “Moon was it? Good day to you.”

The tall animatronic fiddled with his hat.

“..Likewise..”

There was a pause for a moment, but you broke it by asking if he wanted to take a seat beside you. He seemed so nervous. But you’d be lying if you said you didn’t found it cute. He took a seat beside you and you began eating your lunch.

…It was quiet, yet you didn’t mind. You didn’t want to talk while your mouth was full. Moon however, seem to be on edge with the silence. You asked him if he’s alright, and he said he was fine. His tense slowly faded away as time passed.

He only waited for you to finish your food. When you bit off the last bits of your lunch, you went to drink fizzy faz you bought earlier. Seeing this as the right time, he asked you how your day went, and you responded well. You asked his day was going and he replied the same thing.

You asked him how his job is being a daycare attendant, and he replied with honesty. Telling you how most of the time it was ok, but the rest of the time it was very difficult.

As time went on, he noticed that you were taking the lead of the conversation. Did you noticed that he was nervous talking to you? You don’t seem to mind his quiet nature. He feels relaxed just by just being the listener between the two of you.

He made a witty comment on your story, and his circuits heated up when you laughed in joy. “Haha! I didn’t know you had that in ya Moonie!”

He too didn’t know. But he knows it’s because of you. He made you laugh, it was so pretty. It’s like having the same feeling of a fan hearing their favorite singer sing. Is this what Sun felt when he makes everyone around them smile brightly? He wanted this to last.

…

Seeing you and him chatting away, Sun puffed his chest out in pride. “Ugh!...Finally, now that wasn’t so hard now was it?”

Vanessa called for his assistance with carrying two big loaded carts. She asked him what was he talking about.

“Oh nothin’! Just cheering on a fool in love!”

“...Right.”

[sunny-starshine]

In Past relations, does Sun have stripes? Also toe beans!

YAY QUESTIONS!!! If you dont know already those two creatures in the comics are named Spunny and Poony! They are just little creature versions of the sillies... basically htf characters in a way tho

if its the outfit that threw you off in that comic spunny is just wearing a bra and pants, if its the scars than NOPE spunny has no stripes, I project myself a lot onto sunny including my bad habits, luckily wearing ribbons helps hide some things but at home and relaxing why care to hide!!

and for the paws I always give my silly guys paws! its the law!

I dont have many examples of this as I havent drawn a lot of suns feet cause idk its weird WHY DO YOU WANNA LOOK AT FEET! WEIRDO! WHY DONT YOU SNIFF EM TOO! FREAK! *Punches you* Anyways besides that hopefully that answered your question!! if not let me know cause i am a stupid dum dum and misunderstand a lot

[bellysoupset]

i’d actually requested this a while ago, and iirc it didn’t really fit with the timeline back then? when luke and vince weren’t talking.

i’d asked for a fic where lucas and vin watch leo take care of jon during a vertigo episode. like maybe they’re at jon and leo’s place and leo isn’t back from work yet when jonah gets hit with an episode. and both of them are lowkey freaking out. and leo comes in and takes over effortlessly and manages to calm jonah down so much better than either of them did

but if you’d not written this for some other reason then please feel free to ignore it! 🍄

This is probably my favorite fic so far. Maybe. Possibly. It's also long.

------------------------

“Hey, Monacelli,” Vince raised his head and saw Max tapping lightly on the half open door of his classroom. It was halfway through the day and Vince’s classes were already over. From what he had glanced at the overall teachers’ schedule, Daniels still had two more classes to teach, but Vince could go home… But that just seemed a little depressive. 

His parents were busy and his sisters were in class, so going home just meant being alone and he’d much rather stay in school and finish going over the kids’ papers. 

“Yeah?” Vince lowered his red pen and the blonde man pointed over his shoulder, to the sunny patio behind him. 

“Your boyfriend’s here,” Max said in a smug tone and Vince’s blood immediately boiled over. 

He could count in one hand the amount of transphobic shit he had witnessed with Wendy, but Vince wasn’t stupid. He was aware Doveport was fairly conservative and had been bracing for a bigoted comment for a while now.

“I don’t have a boyfriend, you asshole, I have a girlfriend,” he said sharply, dropping the pen immediately and Max jumped back, startled. 

“Uhm, okay, sorry for assuming? But there’s some guy in the parking lot waiting for you,” he shrugged, seeming offended, “geez,” the blonde turned around with an exasperated eye roll and power walked away, leaving a befuddled Vince behind. 

Vin grimaced, realizing he had assumed the worst for absolutely no reason and making a mental note to apologize to the other teacher, before the reality of some dude caught up with him. Weird, but a good surprise, Vince thought, packing up his bag and locking up his classroom. 

He fully expected to find Luke in the parking lot and was not wrong, the guy was sitting on the hood of his green jeep, sunglasses on and chuckling about something. What Vince did not expect was to see Jon standing right next to him, also wearing sunglasses and a jacket, smiling. 

Hell must have frozen over, Vince thought with a smirk, watching the two laugh. It wasn’t rare to see Jonah and Lucas laughing together, even if the two wanted everyone to think they hated each other, but today they looked particularly relaxed. 

“What is going on…?” Vince asked, opening a huge smile of his own when Luke promptly jumped from the hood of the car in order to tackle him into a hug. He squeezed the guy back, half hugging Luke with one arm as they pulled apart, in order to look at Jonah, “Jon?” 

“Hi,” Jonah gave him a small wave, “so uhm- Wendy showed me your birthday gift to her and uh- I wanted - I was wondering-”

It was so weird to watch Jon fumble with his words. Vince frowned, confused, then looked at Luke for an explanation. His best friend was blushing on Jon’s behalf, with a smile so gigantic Vince could see his molars. 

“Oh my god, Jonah!” He exclaimed after a minute, “he wants to buy Leo a ring.”

It took Vince a second, but then he let go of Lucas, all but yelling “YOU’RE GONNA PROPOSE TO LEO!?” and rushing to pull Jon into a hug. 

The other man stiffened, but he had no chance to fight Vince off, nor did he even want to and he melted into the hug for a minute, muffling a chuckle and mumbling a little sheepish “yeah… And I wanted your jewelry recommendation. I really liked Wendy’s birthday present and I think Leo would have my head if I got him a Cartier.” 

“And he wants our help to pick,” Lucas completed the unspoken truth and Jonah glared at him, turning a shade darker with a blush. 

“Shut up-”

“Yeah! YEah, of course, of course!” Vince interrupted the bickering, all but bouncing on his feet, his voice breaking and going up a note,  “Leo’s going to explode with happiness-”

It took Vin a moment to calm down and then yet another moment as they figured out the logistics of it all. Vince still had his motorcycle, so they decided he should just stick with it and drive ahead of them, Luke and Jon following in the jeep. 

The local jewelry shop where Vince had bought Wendy’s birthday was also owned by Italians. The old owner was a friend of Vin’s mom and he lit up as the three men walked into his store. 

“Back for more so soon, Vicenzo?” he asked in a thick italian accent, “I told you, there’s no coming back from the first diamond you get her.” 

“No,” Vince shook his head, planting his hands on Jonah’s shoulders and shaking him like a rattle toy, “today I’m here just as a helper. My friend wants to buy his man a ring.” 

“Hi, I’m Jonah,” Jonah tried to shrug Vince off, offering his hand to the owner.

“Niccolo Fanucci, it’s a pleasure.”

Luke was already inspecting the rings on display, crouching down to get a better look at them, “Leo wouldn’t want anything too flashy,” he said, tunnel vision fully on, “so what are you thinking? Yellow, silver? Tungsten?” 

Jonah wrinkled his nose, “tungsten?” he scoffed, “I’m not buying my fiance a tungsten ring.” 

“What’s wrong with them?” Vince frowned, completely out of his depth. Buying Wendy her birthday gift had taken him hours and he still wasn’t convinced he had done a good job. Probably had, Jonah wouldn’t be there if he didn’t think the quality and design were good enough. 

“Tungsten is extremely durable, almost impossible to scratch-” Luke shrugged and Jonah glared at him. 

“And cheap,” he said sharply, “I want a real ring for Leo.”

“How real?” Vince raised his eyebrows, noticing Niccolo — the owner — visibly perk up as it became clear Jon was down for purchasing the whole store if needed. 

“The best. I want a diamond. Or a bunch,” Jonah leaned over the display, as Niccolo hurried to get his best stuff out of the safe, as well as his design magazines. 

“You want personalized, son?” the man asked and Jon shook his head. 

“No time, I want to propose before his birthday,” he explained, “and that’s next month.”

“We could design something in time,” the man shrugged, opening the bunch of magazines, “how’s this boy of yours? Flashy? Shy?”

“Shy,” Luke got up from his crouched down position, “Leo would rather die than walk around with a huge sparkly ring, Jon, you know that.”

Jonah pouted, “but I want it to be a wedding ring,” he stressed, “I want everyone to know he’s married from across the court.”

“Lawyer?” Niccolo raised an eyebrow, shutting his magazine and throwing it to the side, opening a much older one, “is he traditional?” 

“More or less…” Jonah shook his head, while Vince interrupted him, nodding. 

“Yes,” he flicked at Jon’s ear, “he’s shy and not flashy at all. He also doesn’t wear jewelry, so it has to be comfy.”

“It has to be yellow,” Jon didn’t argue with Vince, despite grimacing. 

Luke frowned, “he’s blonde and super pasty, white gold would look prettier-”

“I want yellow gold, I want it to be clear it’s a wedding band.” 

“Don’t be silly,” Niccolo shook his head, “it can be white gold or platinum and still look like a wedding band.”

“He’s in a straight dominated field where men wear rings, if he has a silver band people will assume it's just some ring,” Jonah groaned, pinching the bridge of his nose, “this is pretty.”

“Absolutely not,” Vince and Luke chorused, looking at the yellow band Jon was pointing at, with three baguette diamonds in the peak. 

“Alright, so yellow gold,” Niccolo flipped through the pages, “and not flashy, but flashy enough people know.”

“It has to be something he likes,” Jonah sighed, studying the rings, “he’s gonna wear it until he dies, so.”

Luke let out a snort, “or not,” he mumbled, only to immediately recoil and jump back as Jon turned to face him like a snake, “because he might get a new one!” he exclaimed, hands raised as if his friend was gonna hit him, “relax!” 

“Shut up, you don’t know Leo enough. What do you think, Vin?” Jonah turned away from Luke and Vince grinned, noticing the other man pout behind Jon. 

“I think I agree with you about the yellow,” he shrugged, “but the diamonds are a bit much, man. Let’s focus on how thick it is, how about?” 

Jonah didn’t know it could take so long to pick a ring. He had expected it would take more than a couple of minutes, after all he was a perfectionist and not willing to compromise in this matter, but at every little thing he said, Luke and Vince had twenty different arguments. 

Finally, after about two hours of back and forth, they settled on a yellow gold ring, with a brushed finish instead of smooth polish and with a baguette small diamond sitting in the middle of it. 

“Now you need to pick the thickness,” Niccolo said, “wait a minute while I get my kit. Sit around, Vincenzo knows where the coffee is. Have a torrone.”

Jonah snorted quietly to himself, he had never been to a jewelry shop that offered a torrone or any type of sticky, sweet food. But then again he had never been in a locally owned shop. 

He walked outside, hearing as Vince and Luke bickered over the gem cut — Vince still thought the pear one was prettier, Luke was team no gem and partial to some design fussiness on the band — and then pressed his forehead to the brick wall outside the store and picked out his phone. 

There wasn’t a text from Leo, they had last spoken that morning, when Jonah had lied through his teeth that he had a surgery to watch that evening and so they couldn’t have lunch together. 

Jonah rolled his shoulders, letting out a breath. He felt stiff all over from stress, the huge weight of picking something that could make or break his proposal making him sweat. He felt nauseous too, but in all truth he had been feeling sick to his stomach with nerves ever since Leo got his promotion and Jon made up his mind about proposing. 

That had always been his plan, after all. Wait until his boyfriend got the promotion that would put them on equal pay, so Leo wouldn’t have a breakdown over wedding prices or feeling like he was being given anything when Jackie inevitably tried to hijack the bill…

“You okay?” Luke planted a hand on his elbow. 

Lucas was almost levitating with how happy he was. It was like he was the one getting married, the dude simply didn’t seem able to stop smiling, even now looking a little concerned and holding a paper cup of coffee. 

“Yeah,” Jonah wiped the sweat off and straightened up, “Niccolo is back?”

“Yep, we’re just waiting for you,” Luke chugged the rest of the coffee that his hyper ass definitely didn’t need and squeezed Jon’s bicep in a cuteness aggression fit, shoving him further inside the store. 

The old owner was holding a large hoop, with a bunch of silver rings on it. Upon Jonah arriving, he opened the hoop, so he could remove the rings one by one, “you said he’s traditional and shy, but not so traditional —” the man said, barely looking up, with that certainty of someone who’s been doing their job their entire life, “and you’ll have a diamond on the band, so you need some thickness, especially if you don’t want the bling to stand out that much…” 

He carefully pushed two bands towards Jon, “try these on and tell me what you think, son.”

Jonah went to grab it, only for his hand to completely miss it. He blinked a couple times, feeling Vince grab him by the elbow.

“Jon, hey- You wanna sit down?”

“No, I’m fine,” Jon shook his head, swallowing down the heightened nausea and grabbing the ring on the left. It was too large on his hand, he had thinner pianist fingers, but the important part was the width, “looks a bit bulky… What size is the rock again?”

Niccolo grabbed a tiny piece of sticker paper and measured, cutting it out and then planting the paper in the middle of the band, “this size.”

“Yeah, no…” Jon shook his head, “not this one.”

“That’s a 5.5mm, try the 4.5mm one,” Niccolo took the ring back, once again doing the paper trick, “that’s a more old fashioned groom width.”

“I think it looks better,” Luke said, as if someone asked him, poking his head in. Jonah nodded, suddenly feeling too woozy. He darted out a hand to grab on something… Anything… Then landed on Vince’s forearm and squeezed. 

“That’s the one,” Jon determined, dead set on getting the bloody ring before vertigo took him out, “uhm- Luke, can you…?”

“Yeah, yeah, I can,” Lucas stepped in front of him, smiling to the confused old man, “I’m buying.”

“I’m sorry, what?”

Jon overheard Niccolo say, but there was a ringing in his ears starting to drown everything out. He squeezed Vince’s arm, “help me outside…”

Vince helped him the couple of steps it took for them to get to the door, then he wrapped an arm around his waist and pulled Jon almost off his feet, dragging him to a bus stop bench. 

Jonah crumpled, spreading his legs and grabbing on the plastic of the bench with all his force, breathing through his mouth, “Fuck,” he sighed, cold sweat spreading down his back, “of all days…”

“I’m sorry, man,” Vince squeezed his nape, “help me here, what do I do?”

“No-nothing…” Jonah leaned forward even more, as his stomach rolled, the world turning into a complete blur. He let out a whimper, feeling like he was falling forward, except the ground never met his face, he just kept falling, falling-

“Should he be lying down!?” Vince’s voice broke through the fog, “I don’t know what to do, you’re the one who’s good with sick people!” 

“Not sick like this!” Luke’s voice answered and Jonah groaned, blindly trying to grab at Luke and shut him up.

“Ssssstop-” Jonah slurred, realizing his mouth felt super sticky and his pants humid. Oh no. Had he wet himself? 

Mortification caused Jon to open his eyes, only to realize the wet spot was just the fact he had puked the McBacon he had had with Luke on their way to Doveport all over the ground and his pants. 

The sight of the chunky brown mess caused his stomach to flip again and Jonah heaved once more, the movement ruining the sliver of balance he had regained and sending the world spinning on its axis once more. 

“ — My place?” Vince, his voice much closer now, as if he was talking in his ear. Jon let his head roll towards the sound and his cheek met something soft- Vince’s thigh? Stomach? 

“I guess!?” Lucas, sounding more than a little nervous, “should we call Leo? Wendy? Hell, your mom?!”

Jon groaned. He wanted none of these people, except maybe Wendy. He desperately wanted Leo’s comfort and the fact his boyfriend wouldn’t be freaking out like the two idiots, but that would mean telling Leo what he was doing in fucking Doveport and-

“Noo,” he slurred, his voice muffled by something, probably Vince’s shirt, “no k- no calling-” his stomach was done with his words and Jonah coughed again, as liquid rushed up his throat and world tilted completely to the left, then right-

“I’m calling Leo,” Lucas, all decisive, “there’s no way this is normal, right? I’m calling him.” 

“The fuck will Leo do if this isn’t?” Vince, sounding far away now. Jonah tried to cling to his voice and make himself responsive, but he just… Couldn’t. When he tried to open his eyes again, he realized he was in a completely different place. 

A pink room?

The black spots clumped in front of his eyes and Jonah let out a whimper, scared and humiliated, and then darkness swallowed him up.

-----------------------------

“Where is he?” Leo’s heart was hammering in his ears. He didn’t suppose anything was scarier than hearing the person you loved the most was completely down for the count, hours away. 

Luke’s call had come at the very end of his day, just as he was packing up to go home. Leo had never made it home, he picked it up on the elevator and felt his heart plummet down to his stomach. 

During the four hours of drive he had plenty of time to think, but had actually done none of that. His head was spinning, nothing made sense, but he didn’t actually give a shit about puzzling things together until he got a look on Jon, because from the way Luke described it, all panicked, it sounded like his worst case yet. 

In fucking Doveport.

He hadn’t been to Vince’s new place yet and for a second Leo felt completely out of place, standing outside of the small one bedroom apartment. Then Luke stepped out of the bedroom, the front of his shirt with a huge wet spot on it and looking visibly worried and Leo’s confusion melted straight into worry.

“He’s here, but he’s really out of it,” Luke leaned on the doorway as Leo walked past him, storming into Vince’s bedroom. 

Jonah was a sight to behold. His six foot tall boyfriend was curled up on his side, almost in a fetal position and looking terribly tiny.

“God, Jon…” Leo walked closer, sitting on the bed and touching the other man’s naked shoulder. Luke and Vince had stripped him down to just his boxers, but he had no fever, in fact he felt cold and clammy to the touch, “why did you dumbasses remove his clothes?”

“Uhm- He kinda, hurled all over ‘em?” Vince scratched at his cheeks, seeming embarrassed, “we didn’t know what to do, once we got them off every time we tried to move him to get him dressed he just seemed to get worse…”

“Great, that’s just fucking great,” Leo scoffed, scooting closer and stroking Jon’s cheek, pushing his tight curls back, “did you get any water in him? When did-”

“It was around 4 PM,” Luke answered, while Vince shook his head to the previous question. 

Leo glanced at his watch. 9:26 PM. Amazing.

“Get me some water, the meds that are in my car, in the glovebox, and a straw. And an empty bowl. And a big sweater, he’s fucking freezing,” he glared at the two, before returning his gaze back to Jon, stroking his head again, “Jonah…” he whispered, leaning in, “angel, I need you to wake up.”

His boyfriend was completely out. His breath smelled sweet, causing Leo’s nose to wrinkle, and he was shivering violently. Leo smoothed a hand down his naked back, moving even closer and feeling Jonah’s steady heartbeat. 

“Hey, Jon,” he pressed his hand in, instead of shaking him, “baby, wake up.”

It took another minute of gentle pushing and calling until Jon’s eyes slipped open. He was out of it and his eyes rolled back, taking another thirty seconds to fully focus on Leo.

“Oh no,” he groaned, curling up more, “not you.”

“Yeah, me,” Leo rolled his eyes, pushing the flash of hurt he felt at Jonah’s words away and grabbing the items Luke had planted on Vince’s bedside table, “I need you to drink some water, okay?”

“Won’t stay down…” Jonah whispered, closing his eyes again, a wrinkle appearing between his eyebrows as if he was in pain, “Leo, I don’t feel well…”

“I know, angel, I know,” Leo’s heart squeezed in sympathy and he leaned in, planting a kiss on his boyfriend’s brow, “trust me here, okay?” he squeezed Jon’s arm, before turning slightly around in order to dissolve the little pink pill that was supposed to help with the vertigo episodes in the glass of water. 

Technically speaking, Leo was aware he shouldn’t do this. Wendy had scolded him once about it… But so far it worked like a charm every time and Leo was not about to listen to Wendy when the matter was Jon. 

“Okay, just a tiny sip,” he held the straw between his fingers, pushing it in Jonah’s mouth and grabbing the man’s pillow in order to tilt his body up just enough he could swallow without choking, “just one, baby.”

It took some prodding, but eventually Jonah took what Leo counted as a fourth of the water. He glanced at his watch again. 09:41 PM. 

“Try to keep this down and we’ll try the rest in a bit,” Leo whispered, draping Vince’s older sweater around Jonah’s naked shoulders and continuing to pet his hair. 

Luke entered the room, every bit like a dog with his tail between his legs, “is he okay…?”

“He will be,” Leo rolled his tense shoulders, then turned his head until his jaw clicked, holding all the tension on his mouth, “what the fuck is he doing in Doveport?”

Luke and Vince exchanged a look, then they both shrugged.

Leo squinted at them, “well?”

“I called him,” Vince said, his whole face turning red, “I called them both, I’m sorry, I just- I was having a bit of a breakdown over Wendy and Jonah just came over to say I’m stupid and-”

“And he brought Luke?” Leo didn’t buy this for a second, but most importantly, the fact Vince was lying to his face only made him feel more furious, “okay.”

“He did! Because he knows I’m the only one who can get through Vince!” Luke sounded so smug about the lie, Leo stared at him, unimpressed. He let his eyes drift away from the dark haired men, looking around the room. 

Jonah’s clothes were folded on top of Vince’s little office table, alongside other papers and all sorts of school items, like stickers and scissors. One of Vin’s bedroom walls was painted dusty pink. 

“You called Jonah first?” Leo asked, feeling his blood turn to ice in his veins, as Vince nodded enthusiastically. 

“I mean, it was about Wendy,” he said, as if that explained everything. Leo nodded, looking over his shoulder. Outside the window he could see Luke’s green jeep parked all crooked in front of the place.

“Yeah, of course,” he agreed through his teeth, turning mechanically and grabbing the glass of water, “Jon, let’s try another sip, baby.”

It took nearly one hour to have Jon fully draining the glass and by then Leo was in full automatic pilot. If he thought too much about the lies, then his thoughts turned a dark, spiraling path that he didn’t enjoy and he didn’t want to indulge. 

Because lies or no lies, he knew Jonah would never do any of the things his brain kept sprouting up. Break up with him. Cheat. 

“I’m fine,” Leo overheard Luke say across the house, as Vince ordered all of them food from the living couch, “no, Bell, I’m really fine, I promise. I’m with Vin, Leo and Jon.”

Leo gulped down the knot in his throat and glanced down, to Jonah napping near his thigh, still all curled up. At least now he had quit shivering violently and none of the medicine had made it back up, so it was well into his bloodstream. 

They were out of the woods, as soon as Jon woke up he’d feed him another round of meds and then- 

“Leo?” Jonah whispered, curling up even more and pressing his forehead to the blonde’s knee, “Leo?”

“Hey,” Leo leaned in, folding in half and forcing his voice past the lump in his throat, “I’m here.”

“Uhm,” Jon let out a little pleased noise, then opened his eyes, “I wanna go home.”

“In a little bit,” Leo kissed his cheek, squeezing his arm, “let’s try sitting up first, okay? It’s a long trip, you really don’t wanna be in the car in case you’re not feeling your best-”

“Leo,” Jonah frowned at him, pushing himself up and letting out a moan, getting a gray cast as he paled, “what’s wrong?”

“My boyfriend is sick?” Leo rolled his eyes, trying to keep the bitterness from his voice, “how’s sitting up?”

“It’s fine,” Jonah raised a shaky hand to his face, rubbing the sleep off his eyes, “I wanna go home.”

“We’re leaving in a bit,” Leo said more firmly, pushing back and collecting his dignity. He felt terrible, equal parts worried and furious and intrigued and terrified – “drink some water, will you?”

Jonah obeyed, frowning, but he was right. He really was as fine as he was going to get so soon, even if weak and shaky, clearly nauseous still. 

Leo managed to keep him down for another one hour and a half, but by the time midnight rolled on — Vince flipping through the TV channels clearly trying to be a decent host, while Lucas had passed out on the floor next to the couch, his head tipped back as he snored —, Jonah glared at him and said in a firm voice, “I wanna sleep in my bed. Can we please go home?”

Leo nodded, rubbing his eyes and trying to feel a little less sleepy himself. He wasn’t so sure he could drive, but he was feeling too proud to admit to that. 

 “Are you sure?” Vince yawned, stumbling up as he saw Leo helping Jonah put on his clothes – they had already been washed and dried long before, “you can stay the night, guys, take my bed and I’ll take the couch and-”

“No, we’re leaving,” Jonah shook his head, holding tightly on the wall to stay upright, “thank you, for everything, but no.”

Vin didn’t look one bit pleased, “this is a horrible idea, it's super late... Leo tell him it’s a horrible idea-”

“We’re going,” Leo couldn’t feel a shred of sympathy for Vince. He was trying, but failing miserably. Now that Jonah was up and stubborn as ever, concern was quickly getting replaced with simple, unmitigated fury. 

“Please call me when you get there,” Vince hung at the door, “please? I’m gonna be up.”

“We’ll call,” Jonah agreed, stumbling to Leo’s car and bracing against it, breathing through his mouth. For a split second Leo considered staying, ignoring Jon’s stubbornness and his own pride and the anger and fear bubbling at the pit of his stomach and just stay and think all of this through in the morning- 

“Goodnight guys,” Vince said in a small voice and Jonah waved, opening a little secret smile to the guy and Leo’s second thoughts burst like a bubble. 

They needed to head home and only then he’d be able to think things through clearly.

Leo’s fingers drummed nervously on the steering wheel as they hit the road, Jon curling up against the window and watching the cars zoom past them. Headlights turning into lines of yellow and white and red.

“Why were you there?” Leo asked, one hour into the trip, when he could no longer hold it in. He turned up the heater, just a bit, noticing Jon was trembling again.

His boyfriend shrugged, but didn’t say anything, and Leo squeezed the steering wheel with a bit more force. 

“Jonah,” he said, his voice dropping, “I need you to talk with me, because I’m freaking out-”

“I can’t tell you,” Jonah’s voice was shot, “I can’t, okay? You just have to trust me-” 

“You already lied to me today, so cut the crap and tell me what were you doing in Doveport and not in surgery like you said-”

“Vince told you!” Jon exclaimed and Leo looked away from the road, his eyes wide in complete shock and anger. 

“You mean the lie he told me!? Do you think I’m stupid?!” Leo forced himself to look ahead, “Vince cannot lie to save his life and you want me-”

“It wasn’t a-”

“He called you first, but it was Luke’s jeep outside, not your car. In his story, you picked up Luke,” Leo hissed, starting to see red, “you lied to my face this morning, Jonah, so this was not some random, panicked call you got in the middle of your day. This was premeditated and-”

“Can’t you just please trust me?” Jonah glared at him, “Leo, what reason do you have not to trust me-”

“The fact that you’re LYING!?” Leo exclaimed, pulling the car to the dust shoulder and causing Jon to let out a whine at the sudden motion. He couldn’t drive like this, barely paying the road any attention. 

Jon was breathing through the dizziness when Leo turned to him, panting as he tried to keep his emotions at bay, “Jon, just be honest with me-”

“Please, please just drop it. It’s nothing bad-”

“Are you cheating on me?” Leo said without thinking and felt pathetic as he heard the words said out loud. He knew this wasn’t it, he knew it deep in his bones that whatever Jonah did, it would never be that. 

It didn’t stop the intrusive thought from continuously sprouting up.

Jonah’s head snapped and he glared at Leo, all vulnerability slipping away for a second and being replaced with anger, “oh my god, listen to yourself, Leo! You really think, I- God, you’re being fucking- You’re ruining everything,” he pushed the passenger door open and pushed himself out, causing Leo to jump out of the car as well. 

“I don’t know what to think! You’ve been acting weird for days and now you’re lying to me and your little buddies are all helping in the lie and I’m here, fucking nursing you-” 

“I DIDN’T FUCKING ASK YOU TO COME!” Jon yelled, hitting the car with a hand and Leo jumped at the explosion, his eyes wide and his heart speeding up, only to suddenly stop as Jonah’s shoulders shook and he folded in, grabbing on the top of the car with both hands and letting his head hang. 

Leo took a second, trying to make any sense of the scene in front of him, but then his body was moving before his mind caught up. Grabbing Jon by the shoulder, feeling his whole frame shake with sobs. 

“Jon- Shit, shit, shit, Jonah I didn’t mean to make you cry,” Leo mumbled frantically, his thoughts clearing up due to the searing certainty he had just messed up severely, “I didn’t mean to hurt you, baby, shit-” he cupped Jonah’s face and tried to wipe away the tears, only for the other man to shove his hands away. 

“Stop- Stop fucking t-touching me-” Jonah groaned, stumbling and falling sit on the passenger side, his legs still out of the car, covering his face with his hands as he continued to cry, “I can’t be-believe you think I- I would never- I-”

“No, I know, I know,” Leo sunk to his knees, mind reeling as he ignored Jon’s plea to stop touching him and grabbed his boyfriend’s wrist, “Jon, I’m so sorry, I’m an ass, I know you wouldn’t-”

Jonah’s whole frame shook with a sob and he angrily shoved Leo back, but in his movement the blonde got a decent look at his face and his heart broke in a billion pieces. Jonah looked genuinely hurt, tears streaming down his face and clinging to his chin, green eyes all red due to the crying-

“I’m so sorry,” Leo leaned in, pressing his forehead to Jonah’s and cupping his face, “baby, please stop crying-”

“I- I was-was,” Jonah pulled back, angrily wiping the tears and Leo let out a whine at the loss of contact. 

“I don’t wanna know,” he cut him off, “you’ll tell me later, a- another day,” Leo forced himself to say, “it’s fine, I don’t wanna-”

“I was buying your fucking proposal ring,” Jonah spat, glaring at him, his voice raspy, “and now you ruined it.”

Leo’s ears rang and he fell back on his ass in the humid grass, feeling like suddenly he was the one who had vertigo. He opened and closed his mouth, then felt tears springing up, “my proposal ring?” the question didn’t even sound like his voice.

Jonah scoffed, nodding, “yeah. You jackass, your proposal ring. Happy now? I was gonna propose at your birthday and they were just helping me and now you fucking ruined it and-”

“Yes,” Leo answered, without thinking and causing Jon’s mouth to snap shut, then open again, then shut in a tight line.

“No,” he glared at the blonde, “I’m not-”

“I’ll ask then,” Leo rolled his eyes, moving forward so he was resting on just one knee in front of the car door, “you can’t un-propose, you bought me a ring, I- I’ll ask. Are you gonna say no?”

Jonah frowned, clearly stuck between the rock and the sword, because he really didn’t want to propose on the side of the road, with his head throbbing from crying and puking, still wanting to strangle Leo and feeling wounded as fuck- With the ring on the pocket of his jacket… But there was simply no world or reality where he said no to Leo asking him to marry him. 

“You can’t steal my proposal,” Jonah scoffed, grabbing the box in his pocket and grossly sniffling, wiping the tears with the back of his hand, “you’re such a dick,” he opened the box. 

“You’re a romantic,” Leo grinned, then chuckled, “I can’t see the ring, it’s too dark.”

“SEE!” Jonah exclaimed, angry, “it’s a horrible proposal and you’re the one who ruined-” he never quite finished the complaint, as Leo leaped and kissed him, pushing Jon flat on his back inside the car. 

“I don’t need to see the ring,” Leo groaned, kissing him again and again, "the answer is always yes, Jon. Ring, no ring, it's always yes.”

[five-rivers]

Cryptid Crawl! 7

“You… aren’t a cryptid,” said the man who’d been chasing Danny for literal miles.

“What?” demanded the other unbelievable human being, who hadn’t been all that far behind the first guy.  “Did these guys hire you to make us look bad?”

“Uh, no?” said Danny, who realized he’d said it like a question.  “No,” he repeated, more confidently, because this was the plan.  “I am making you look bad freelance.”

“That’s the wrong word, dude,” said Tucker.  

“It’s pro bono,” corrected Sam.  

“Pro bono.”  He nodded.  “Like Peter Parker.”

“Still the wrong thing.”

“What does Spider-Man have to do with this?”

“We both wear cool costumes and have our pictures taken, duh,” said Danny, not mentioning the superhero thing.  He started to peel the contacts out of his eyes.  

“What are you doing going around dressed like the Amity Park Phantom, then?”

Danny snorted.  “There is no Amity Park Phantom.  It’s just me and sometimes my friends messing around.”

Crawly’s face turned dangerously furious.  “It’s what?”

“This is like…”  He waved his hand vaguely.  “A prank?  Follow people around, spook them a little?  It’s something we do sometimes, for the bit.”

“The bit?  What do you mean, the bit?”

“For the joke.  You don’t think Amity Park is really haunted, do you?”  Danny rolled his eyes theatrically.  “I was going to do the same thing today, but then you started chasing me.”  He pointed accusingly at Bill.  “Like, you chased me for blocks.  It freaked me out.”  That last bit was hardly even a lie.

“Uh,” said Bill.  “Sorry?”

“I mean, I guess it’s your job, but–”

“Wait, wait, wait,” said Az, who had lost a great deal of his for-television veneer.  “If you’re not a ghost, how were you running that fast?  How were either of you running that fast?  That kind of speed isn’t possible for normal humans!”

“Yeah, duh, that’s because Bill is an ex-military super-spy!” said Crawly, leaning on Bill’s shoulder.

“I’m retired from the spy business, actually.”

“That’s not the point!” said Az, throwing his hands up in the air.  He then pointed accusingly at Danny.  “You!” he said.  “Do you have any idea how this’ll affect our ratings?  I can’t afford to go job hunting again!  No one will hire Jimmy!  He doesn’t talk!”

“Oh, yeah,” said Danny, unzipping the top part of the fake hazmat suit so he could shrug halfway out of it and tie the arms around his waist, “where are the other two stooges?”

Az spun on the spot and stalked away, followed by a good deal of the camera crew.  Then he came back, dragging his brother and Jimmy with him.  Danny’s eyes met with Jimmy’s.  

Danny’s ghost sense started to go off– And he swallowed it.  No breathing a bunch of weird blue fog in the middle of a sunny spring day on camera.  Nope.  Danny had to admit he was impressed, though.  That was a very realistic human disguise.  

“You,” said Az, “are getting interviewed, and you,”  he turned his baleful finger at Crawly, “are getting off our set.”

“What set?  This is an abandoned lot.  You can’t make us do anything.”

They started bickering.

Apart from one of the hosts being a ghost, and the others being bizarre enough that Danny was wondering if they would fit in in Amity Park, this was actually going quite well.  Neither show would have a coherent enough episode to make Amity Park interesting to any wannabe ghost hunter tourists.  Or cryptid hunters.  Whatever.

Gosh, the only thing they needed now was for the UFO hunters to come out of the woodwork.  Or was Hannah enough of one to fulfill that category all by herself?

Before Danny could decide, a massive pillar of green light originating from a couple miles away lit up the sky.  The sky howled and pulsed.  

“What the hell was that?” demanded Az.  “You guys saw that, too, right?”

“Yep,” said Ned.  

“Hmm,” said Jimmy.  

“Bill,” said Crawly, “I think this trip just became worth it again.”

They all left.  

“What,” said Danny, “was that?”

“Uh,” said Tucker, “I’m working on it.  Get Ember.”

“Ember?”

“Or Desiree or someone else who can either cause a massive distraction or unscrew reality because I am–”  there was a crashing sound.  “

“I’ll get her,” said Jazz.  

Danny jumped.  “Have you been listening the whole time?”

“Yeah, but it’s busy here, so sue me.  I’ll talk to Ember, just tell me what you need.”

“Hey, Danny!”

“Dani!” exclaimed Danny, looking up.  “Val!”  He paused.  “Are you sure you should be hoverboarding this close to the cameras?”

“Shut up,” said Val, “we’re here to give you a ride to whatever that was.”

“I’m on my way, too,” said Sam.  “Hold on, there, Tucker.”

.

Danny, Val, and Jazz arrived to see most of the Groovy Ghost Blasters Extreme unconscious and stuck to various walls with bright green goo and Tucker trying to hack the GAV and Danny’s parents nowhere in sight.

“Where are Mom and Dad?” asked Danny, jumping off Valerie’s board.  Valerie tapped her heels together, retracting the board as soon as he was off.  

“Chasing the tiger.  Apparently they think it’s a ghost.”

“Great,” said Danny, rubbing his hand down over his face.  “Sam’s not going to be happy about that.”  He jogged over to the Groovy Ghost Blasters Extreme and started checking vitals.  “Everyone looks alive.”  Now, he should get them off the wall and to a hospital or something.  Getting knocked out wasn’t generally good for people…

“What should I do?” asked Dani.  

“Uh,” said Danny.  “I don’t know, Tucker?  What was your plan?”

“Uh,” said Tucker.  He pointed at a trailer that held the ruins of several vehicles.  “Stage.”  He pointed at the smoking holes in the street.  “Mist from black ice?”  He pointed at the GAV.  “Lighting and sound system?  I don’t know, man.  I’m just making things up.  There’s no way we can hide this on our own.”

“The hunters are getting closer,” said Sam.  “It’d be great if I had some help slowing them down.”

“Okay,” said Danny, “okay.”  He ran over to the GAV and used his handprint to sign in.  Most of the controls were still locked out for him - no driving license - but it got Tucker that little bit forward.  “Uh, then, Dani, you fill up anything smoking with dry ice, Val, you and me, we need to get those guys to a hospital.”

“I think I’ll have to do that myself,” said Val, “unless you have a hoverboard.”

“To cut them out,” said Danny, producing a pair of Fenton Scissors from his pocket and walking over.  “Otherwise, that stuff won’t come off unless you take a wall with it.”  He spoke from unfortunate experience.  Usually, he’d just phase them out, but… witnesses.

Things had been going so well, too.

.

“Babypop is letting me perform in his precious city?” asked Ember, eyebrow raised.  

“Assuming you do it fast, yes,” said Jazz, blowing a strand of hair out of her face.  She was covered in flour, eggs, butter, batter in various states of mixture, and icing.  “You know that your performances were never the problem.  The problem was the mind control.”

“But he’s suddenly okay with it now?”

“He’s got to hide the results of a ecto-gun fight between our parents and trigger happy ghost hunters.  Tucker thinks their ATV trailer could be covered up as a stage.”

“And why should I?  If Amity becomes famous, maybe some of that spills over.  More people to hear me play.  More people to shout my name.”

“Do you want to be famous in your own right, because of your music, or because you’re a ghost?” snapped Jazz.  

“What do you think, babe?” asked Ember, leaning back towards the rest of the ghosts.  

“Do it, and show them the error of underestimating you!” said Skulker, around a mouthful of cake, and how did that even work, exactly?  Jazz just… ugh.  She didn’t want to know.  

“Okay, yeah, sounds good.  I’ve performed on worse.  I’ll take a look.”

.

“Maybe we should call an ambulance, actually,” said Danny.  Getting knocked out like this and staying knocked out was generally a bad sign.  

“And screw things up for whatever friend you’ve got coming to turn this into some kind of rock show?” asked Valerie.  

“It’s just Fenton Sleeping Gas,” called Tucker.  “According to the weapons logs, anyway.”

Danny briefly looked skyward.  “Why do they even have that?  I swear…”

“I have Ember on her way, better get Valerie out of there.”

“Yeah,” said Danny, “just, uh.  Dani!  Help Val carry these guys, will you?”

Dani dropped another chunk of ice into a hole.  “On it!”

“Cool, cool, cool,” said Tucker.  “There’s so much stuff.  Why is there so much stuff?”

Danny wasn’t sure if he was talking about the code in the GAV, the weapons in the GAV, or the debris scattered all over the road.  In any case, there was a lot of stuff.  

But Valerie was flying off, and… “Sam, do we have an ETA on those guys?”

“You’re lucky they didn’t have cars,” said Sam.  “Halfway there.”

“Thanks.”  Danny transformed and started pushing stuff out of the way.  He also did the fastest structural ice-work of his life, covering up the trailer and making it look more stage-like.  He hid several of the gaping holes in the street– hopefully being filled with ice wouldn’t make them worse– and worked on putting out the few fires that were still going, despite Dani’s ice.  

Then he paused and surveyed his work.  It looked…

… Bad.  

Genuinely, there was no way around it.  

“Oi, babypop!” called Ember from above.  “What’re you doing chilling out when it’s time to rock on?”

Smiling at Ember was a new experience for Danny.  Maybe–

“Hey, uh.  That one terrifying camera guy is fighting a tiger, now, what do I do?”

The tiger.  The one his parents had been chasing.  

“Sorry, got to go!” he shouted.  

“Are you ditching me?” demanded Ember.  

“It’s not you,” said Tucker, “it’s the tiger.”

.

“That’s a tiger,” said Ned.  He might have been more concerned about the situation if the tiger wasn’t running away from Bill.  

“Hng,” said Jimmy.  

“Genuinely a tiger.  Just a tiger.”

“Hm,” said Jimmy.  

“You know what?  I’m done.”

“Yes!  Get it, Bill!  If we can’t have a cryptid we can at least get an anomalous big cat!”

“Hm?”

“Just done.  Done with this, done with the show, done with everything.  I want to retire and work on classic cars.”

“You can’t retire,” hissed Az, who was hiding behind Jimmy.  “You’re in your thirties!  And we don’t know what that light was, yet!”

Ned was very tempted to say screw the light.  

Behind him, the producer attempted and failed to call animal control.  

“Fine, we can go see what the light was about, but if we get there and it’s a kid in an iceberg–”

“What are you talking about?”

“Oh, like you never watch cartoons.”

“Yes!  Yes!  Now zoom in on its face.  I’ve never seen a tiger like this before, maybe it’s endangered!”

.

“Please, please set up,” begged Tucker.  “Please start playing.”

“Uh, no,” said Ember, crossing her arms.  “I’m not performing for an empty street.”

“You said–”

“I’d said I’d take a look.  So here I am.  Looking.”

“Ember,” squeaked Tucker.  “Come on.  You got free cake.”

“For staying hidden, yeah.  But that’s not my point, geek squad.  Don’t you think that me playing to absolutely no one would be suspicious?  No way this is a concert.  It’s a special effects test for later this week.  And you’d better believe that later this week, I’ll be collecting.”

.

Danny flashed into visibility in front of his parents and prepared himself for a very long chase.  

.

They eventually got hold of animal control.

.

“No, you can’t be here.  I’ve got it cleared with the city to test this stuff, and it’s proprietary. You’re lucky security is on break, so you’d better get your stupid cameras out of here before they get back.”

“But the light–” started Az.

“Pro. Pri. E. Tary.  What. Part. Don’t. You. Get.  Little T, how’s your martial arts class going, can you kick these guys out?”

“Uh,” said Tucker, who was honestly sort of impressed by Ember’s whole performance, improvised as it was.  But then, he supposed she had practice.  It must be hard getting a venue when you were dead and had no money.  Between how she’d altered the stage with her powers and what she was saying now, they might be able to pull this off.  “Maybe?”  He sized up the tallest of the three ‘Investigators.’ “Probably not, actually.”  Not without weapons, anyway.  

“Whatever, it’s not like that’s what I pay you for.”

“You know what?” asked Az, who was, at this point, staring dead-eyed into space.  “I’m done.  Let’s go get cake.”

“That’s the smartest thing you’ve said since we got here,” said Ned.  

“Cake,” said Jimmy.  

“Oh, crud,” mumbled Tucker.  

“What?” said Sam.  He could see her head peeking out of an alley a few blocks down.  “Are they not buying it?”

“Worse,” whispered Tucker.  “They’re going for cake.”

.

“Hey,” said Crawly, as the tiger was loaded into the truck by animal control.  “This might have been a bit of a bust, but we can still go get cake.”

“Any day where I get to wrestle a cryptid tiger is a good day,” said Bill.  

“Uh,” said one of the animal control people.  “It’s a regular tiger, just albino.”

Crawly held up a finger.  “Hush, you.”

[sugar-glaze-donut]

Hii!! <3

If it's alright with you, could do some drabbles/small hcs of the devil butlers who have an aruji-sama who is a long dragon/Chinese dragon? I've been thinking about this concept for a while, I still haven't seen any sort of supernatural MC in this fandom😭 I mean it makes sense since the game MC is supposed to be basically just a self insert of the player, but it would still be nice to see an aruji who's like nonhuman and stuff •w• sorry if I rambled a bit there (T_T)

Why hello Anon! I see you have an interesting request!

In my past few works, I wrote about Aruji-sama who's a devil, an angel and a fairy. But an Aruji-sama who's a Chinese dragon? I LOVE YOUR IDEA!!!

I did a lot of searching about the Chinese dragon, here are the sources I used! - Here! (Please let me know if some information is fake or isn't true!) (Also PLEASE tell me if anything I wrote here is offensive in any kind of way! I don't want to accidentally offend anyone here, I want my readers to feel comfortable reading my writing)

Headcanons under the cut!

Eyes

First of all, I'd like to imagine that Aruji-sama has eyes with a gradient of colours and slitted pupils. Colourful eyes are extremely unusual in the Human world, so Aruji-sama has to hide their identity by wearing colour contacts.

Ever since going to the Akuneko world and seeing the butler's MAJESTIC eyes, Aruji-sama probably thought that taking their contacts off would be a good idea...

But even if colourful eyes aren't unusual in that world, slitted eyes sure are!

▪️ ❤️ ▪️ 🐲 ▪️ ❤️ ▪️

Nac 🗝️: Oh Aruji-sama! Your eyes are stunning as always!

Aruji-sama ❤️: O-oh thanks-

Lucas 🍷: Is this some sort of unusual genetics from your world, Aruji-sama? May I have a closer look?

Aruji-sama ❤️: Yes, of course-

Lamli ⭐: Aruji-sama! Your eyes are sparkly... like, like stars!

Aruji-sama ❤️: *sobbing internally from embarrassment* (from my research, apparently Chinese Dragons are shy? Oh my! I suppose we have another case of slightly insecure and shy Aruji-sama, oh no!)

▪️ ❤️ ▪️ 🐲 ▪️ ❤️ ▪️

Scales and Tails

Just another note about Aruji-sama's appearance! Once they open up to the butlers, I'd like to think that they'd let their appearance slip through their human looks. From their tail suddenly popping out when they're happy, to showing their canine teeth when they're angry.

Think of it as... those Zhongli (from Genshin Impact) or Dan Heng (from Honkai Star Rail) in their half-dragon forms! That's what I imagine Dragon Aruji-sama to look like!

▪️ 🐲 ▪️ 🪭▪️ 🐲

Aruji-sama: Guys... I have to tell you something...

Berrien: Yes? What's wrong Aruji-sama?

Aruji-sama: I'm not human... *shows their dragon features*

The butlers: *gasp* 😯

Miyaji: Aruji-sama...

*insert Miyaji turning into his half-animal form after Aruji-sama unleashes his demon (why the fuck does that sound so wrong??)*

Miyaji: Me too...!

Aruji-sama: aww! *on the verge of tears cause they feel safe in the palace*

(if you know this meme take this 👑)

▪️ 🐲 ▪️ 🪭▪️ 🐲

Fortune and Rain

Last but not least, as Chinese Dragons represent "Good Fortune" and "Strength", I think that Aruji-sama's presence would give extreme luck to every butler in the palace

It can be small, unnoticeable things to unusual and terrifyingly weird events. Like Ammon's roses growing unusually well in bad weather, Nac feeling energized even after he only had a few hours of sleep, and... Haures actually succeeding in making something edible!?

The butlers might freak out (especially because of Haures's case).

And with the power of Google, I have found out that Chinese Dragons are usually associated with water. Occasional rainclouds here and there... oh and nobles slipping on puddles here and there... why is that noble drenched? Wasn't today sunny all day?

▪️ ⭐ ▪️ 🧧 ▪️ ⭐ ▪️

Boschi: Hey Ammon, don't you think things are going a little too well these days?

Ammon: Now that you mention it, that's kinda true...

Fennesz: It's not bad though... we should be on guard in case something happens-

Haures: Hey everybody look! I actually succeded in making cookies :D

Boschi: WHAT THE FUCK-

Ammon: YOU IMPOSTER! WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO THE REAL HAURES-SAN!

Fennesz: I'm hallucinating, I'm definitely hallucinating...

Haures: ...do you want to try my cookies at least? :(

...

The rest of the butlers: I feel a disturbance in the force...

Aruji-sama ❤️: a-ACHOO!

▪️ ⭐ ▪️ 🧧 ▪️ ⭐ ▪️

Some random noble: You and your butlers suck! *walks away*

Berrien: Are you alright Aruji-sama? Please don't listen to that noble. I'm sure they-

*Berrien hears a scream in the distance*

Berrien: Oh my! Was that the noble... why are they drenched?

Aruji-sama: *looks away awkwardly* Maybe a puddle just fell on them...

Berrien: Ah, of course, that makes sense- huh? Wait that's not right..

▪️ ⭐ ▪️ 🧧 ▪️ ⭐ ▪️

🍩Side note for anon: I hope I was able to get your request right! Sorry it took me so long to write this... 🍩

Last edited - January 29th 2024

✦ Want to read more of my works? Come and take a look at my Masterlist! Have a nice day, toodles! ✦

[silly-inky]

I feel like your trio would find the triplets reaction to my Sunny both funny and rather unfortunate.

Funny because three kings with reputations of being terrifying creatures of the night who strike madness into the hearts of men, raining disease upon those who disrespect the dead and dethroning monarchs for the crime of trying to slight Alex, are scared of the nicest guy you will ever meet

Unfortunate because my Sunny really wants to be friends with them but they won't because he freaks them the hell out, which is understandable because he's a very bizarre copy of them with a distorted voice, but still

I suppose they would feel more sorry for your sunny than anything, they've seen many horrific things and terrifying things, things that truly fuck with your head, they have seen and experienced weirder and I feel like the would genuinely feel sorry for you sunny because the only thing truly off with him is his voice, and to them it isn't even that disturbing, just a little hard to decipher sometimes, like or course it's weird to see some clone amalgamation of you and a few others but that's nothing off putting to them

I feel like they would poke fun at the other Boo's for not being able to handle him

[darishima]

bonesy here ! do the character ask thing with either ummmm aubrey omori (because you said shes you coded)(i know you havent finished the game im just thinking lots about it becuase im still formulating my response) or midari (because i know youre so abnormal abt her dari) or stan pines (because you keep posting about him) -🦴

hehe hiii bonesy. thats just your name now i guess. change it legally thats the rules

sidenote but the other day (yesterday actually) i was on a discord call w my friend and mentioned offhandedly something like "oh yeah theres an anon that regularly sends me stuff and the other day they asked--" and then they went "oh yeah i know i've seen bonesy asks" LIKE LMFAO.. bonesy truly just is your name now. and all my mutuals will know of you

anyway. hmm. for aubrey (please note i have played like 30 minutes of omori):

sexuality headcanon: lesbian gender headcanon: transfem aubrey is good but to me thats a she/they cis girl a ship i have with said character: AUBREY X KIM, EASY a BROTP I have with said character: kel and aubrey 4ever a NOTP I have with said character: aubrey x any man. any of them. especially sunny. sunburn makes me want to throw up and i dont respect anyone who ships it sorry. i pray youre not a sunburn shipper bonesy or i'll hafta kick you out of my inbox /j a random headcanon: hmm. she plays guitar or bass general opinion of said character: i like her :3 i'll like her a lot more when i actually . yk. finish omori.

also since my omori knowledge is limited i consulted my wonderful best friend-partner-mortal enemy @/stariacht, my resident omori expert (who im playing it with) and when i asked about his general opinion he said: "she’s such a good character and the omori fandom not only has no idea how to interpret her but they dumb her down so much and i refuse to talk to anyone about aubrey unless they prove to me they aren’t stupid LMAO" and to that i say he is right. and i agree

midari, i have some OPINIONS ABOUT WHICH WILL MAKE SOME PEOPLE ANGRY BUT IM OBJECTIVELY RIGHT:

sexuality headcanon: lesbian, only sexually involved with men for her own gain/pleasure, not actually attracted to them gender headcanon: i think outwardly she presents as a cis girl cause she doesnt really care what people think about her but internally she's like, genderqueer nonbinary, she/it/they, but she wouldnt bother coming out beyond occasional offhanded mentions of "not being a girl" a ship i have with said character: MIDARI X SAYAKA!!! also midari x yumeko because im WHAT? DELUSIONAL ! [im schizophrenic i can say that] a BROTP I have with said character: midari x runa, weird little freak creatures <3 a NOTP I have with said character: this is about to piss some people off . but yuriko x midari is my notp. i dont HATE IT necessarily its just.. such a nothingburger.. yuriko doesnt have enough characterization in canon for me to care about her beyond the version of yuriko that exists in my head so i dont want midari with her. theyre friends though and midari likes her. also midari x ryota is so disgusting it makes me want to slit my throat general opinion of said character: me irl /srs. my one true love. my world, my everything, the center of the universe, the point that my entire life and identity revolves around. without midari i am nothing. without midari i do not exist

stan pines:

sexuality headcanon: he feels kinda aroace i cant lie but maybe pansexual. or bisexual. or, more likely, he has no idea what any of the labels mean and just calls himself whatever will serve him in the moment LMAO gender headcanon: just a guy. jus some dude a ship i have with said character: none, really ? maybe stan x eda clawthorne cause its funny, but nobody from gf a BROTP I have with said character: stan and soos !!! a NOTP I have with said character: stan x bill. eugh a random headcanon: he secretly feeds waddles leftovers or scraps under the table at dinner. he loves that damn pig general opinion of said character: looove him. love him dearly. wish he was my uncle...

[singswan-springswan]

I dunno man I got nothing

words: 2217

rating: teen and up

warnings: mentions of prostitution

summary: Lucy wanders back to the marina and properly meets the merman that saved her life

read here on ao3 | part one | part two | part four | part five

@accidental-spice

Lucy had a brain worm. It would bother her less if she actually knew what song was stuck up there, or what the words were, or even how the tune was meant to go. All she had was the vaguest impression of music ringing back and forth between both ears, and it was something she’d lost a week of good sleep over.

It was sweet, she could say for sure at least. But the biggest feeling behind it was a staggering wistful loneliness, so raw and bitter that the kinder notes were weighed a whole octave down. Was that the right description? Music wasn’t Lucy’s forte. The song had been aching at the back of her brain for days, dismissable at first, but only growing louder as time passed. Even Grey noticed.

“Get some sleep, Chen.” He’d looked her up and down with the bordering judgemental stare he used to redirect concern. It was the end of her shift, and the next day she had off. Grey seemed grateful of that fact. “You look like a wreck.”

Lucy could only straighten and nod, because he wasn’t wrong. He might have been exaggerating, but Lucy was far from her best. She’d been distracted. And very tired. Plus the frenzy following the marina incident had left her feeling unfulfilled, even after they rounded up all the lunatics from the boat and had them detained. There was a trial date set. Still, Lucy felt unsettled.

She couldn’t sleep that night. And trying to carry her efforts well into the morning was a prospect that made her almost ill. So she got up, dressed, and tried to be productive. It was noon by the time she gave up on chores and studying to venture into the wild (walking out her door). There was only one place to go.

Ears ringing, Lucy wandered to the marina, almost spell-bound. By pure force of will alone did she manage to detour temporarily for lunch from Jho’s diner, where any cop worth their badge knew to spend the extra money. It was a convenient spot, so close to the station. Lucy had grown very fond of the food. She ordered two burgers. Weird and dumb of her, yes, but she ordered two.

She found the same rock shelf, found a flat spot to sit, unstrapped her sandals and laid them neatly to the side.

It was sunny. The sky was a warm shade of blue. A gentle motion stirred the air, softer than a breeze, and it smelled like casual California. Lucy stuck the tips of her toes into the lapping skim across the stones at her feet. The brisk feel was chilly. She unwrapped her burger.

It hadn't gone unnoted just how crazy it was to come back here. Had the event progressed any differently, Lucy might now be plagued with fresh PTSD and incredible discomfort. She was still a fairly green rookie. All these dramatic near-death experiences should have a weighty impact on her psyche. But this was different. For obvious reasons.

There was no sign of him now—not that that was saying anything. The marina was no resort, and its state of cleanliness sure reflected that fact. Lucy couldn’t blame him if he didn’t enjoy being here. It was a lot grosser than it looked at first glance. Still, her head was full of music, and she couldn’t help hoping that he’d show.

Lucy didn’t need validation. Not really. She knew what she’d seen, and she’d quickly made peace with it. No point agonizing over something like that, especially when there was no one she could rant to about it without risking time in an asylum. Anyway, she owed him her life. And she wasn’t about to disrespect that simply because his existence was a shock.

She wanted to see him. She didn’t need to… but she wanted to. She’d be nuts if she didn’t want to. Like most every little girl, she’d had a rampant mermaid obsession, and while she’d have preferred to meet the guy at that point in her life, the revelation was still cool now. In a freaky way. But still.

There were lots of questions she could ask. Just looking would be great too. But she couldn’t see any fish man frequenting the joint. In fact, she’d just taken the halfway bite of her burger when she decided he wouldn’t be making an appearance. Why would he?

It’d be hard to see him coming regardless, given where he’d be coming from. She consciously fixed her gaze to one spot. Scanning the surface and shoreline was doing nothing except make her eyeballs hurt. No point in that.

“I will literally prostitute myself to you for the rest of that burger.”

Lucy was. She was proud of herself for not reacting. Outwardly at least. Her heart might have stopped beating for a second or so. And—to be fair, she did pause midchew and flick her eyeline to where the voice came from. She should have seen him in her peripheral. 

He was sitting right in front of her. Granted, the water was dark and not the most crystal clear quality, but Lucy still mentally kicked herself. He was hard to miss. Even just the top half. 

For a prolonged and very awkward moment, Lucy stared. He was there. Right in front of her. An undeniable, real-life merman. 

It was unusual to see swimmers in the marina. Most people that frequented the place knew better. Hopefully if anyone saw him at a distance, they’d write him off as an idiot that didn’t know the restrictions, much less the health hazards. At a distance, the fins and gills weren’t too noticeable.

He was objectively hot. Lucy didn’t have a real chance to appreciate that before. Not that she’d expect any less from this particular strain of mythical creature. He had very pretty features, all hard lines, and sharp slopes, almost graceful in spite of the tension around his eyes. There was primal expectancy in his expression. The only thing keeping him from mugging her on the spot, it seemed, was some conditioned vestige of powerful self-control.

This was the single weirdest thing that had ever happened to Lucy. Even weirder than that incident with the pink tracksuit.

“...no need.” She managed around a mouthful of burger, then pushed the greasy bag towards him with her fingertips.

If his eyes tensed anymore, it’d look like he was narrowing them. His face remained blank otherwise.

It took another awkward moment before the realization settled in.

“You—”

“I got two of them. I don’t know why. You can have the other.”

He blinked firmly, then swallowed. Something close to awe flashed across his face. “Seriously?”

Lucy nodded with a quirk in the corner of her lips. “Yeah, uh. No… no prostitution necessary.”

Whatever desperation led to him making such an offer in the first place didn’t seem to rush him at her counter. His appreciation was slow, in fact. Slow and savory. He leaned forward and pulled the bag over, unrolled the top carefully, closed his eyes a fraction longer than an average blink and inhaled—actually inhaled out loud. Lucy watched utterly bemused as tears began to form.

“Are you okay?”

The way he unwrapped the burger was borderline sensual. It was weirding Lucy out a little bit.

“It’s been a long time s—” The wistfulness in his voice rang an alarm bell in her brain. Then she noticed. The music had stopped.

“Wait.” She interrupted. “You… it was you.”

He might have paused making love to his lunch and given her more attention if this wasn’t a long lost reunion of sorts. At least he looked at her over his first bite (the man had fangs).

“You did something when…” Lucy cleared her throat. “I couldn’t stop thinking about you all week.”

He had the audacity to raise an eyebrow. “Shocking.”

“No—! No, it’s not like that, I swear.” She thought about precursing her confession with a dumb disclaimer about it sounding weird, but after a second of consideration for the fact that she was watching a merman eat a cheeseburger from her favorite diner, she decided that any such statement would make her sound stupid. “I’ve been hearing music in my head ever since—you know. That’s gotta be you. Mermaids do music, right?”

Now he was giving her a judgy look. “First of all,” He talked with his mouth full too. “I’m not a mermaid.”

“Okay—”

“Second of all, that’s just your imagination.”

“The music?”

He was halfway through a euphoric bite when disgust overcame the pleasure in his features and made him reel back suddenly. “Ugh, what’s wrong with you? You eat tomatoes on your burger?”

Lucy was caught off guard. She could only watch, wholly miffed, as he squinted cynically and plucked the tomatoes off with surgical precision.

It couldn’t be her imagination. She’d never felt that way before. She lost sleep over it, without once associating the brain worm with the merman at all. There had to be a reason. This had to mean something.

“That one had everything on it. Listen—I’m not crazy, okay? I know what I—”

“You’re not?”

He had a lot of nerve. Lucy frowned at him.

“It was almost incapacitating. I felt like I had no choice but to come here, like I was in a trance. Tell me that doesn’t sound like typical mermaid pranking.”

The suggestion earned her a derogatory snort. “Pranking’s not the right word, boot. And what you’re describing isn’t possible. I didn’t sing to you.”

Lucy opened her mouth. She wanted to insist, but she didn’t know what to say to him—didn’t really have the authority to speak—not when she knew so little about what he was. “But, isn’t it possible?”

“It’s not what happened. I never—”

“How else can you explain the way it’s affecting me?”

“I already told you. It’s just your imagination.”

Accepting that didn’t feel right. Lucy’s frown deepened into a scowl. “I don’t believe you.”

“Of all things you’re not believing—”

“I got you a burger.”

“And I saved your life.”

For a tense moment, they stared each other down. He had a scary stare. He had stony TO energy. Lucy would hate him and his judgy presumptuousness if he was her TO. Did he come all this way just to give her a hard time? 

Whatever the case, her refusal to back down must have earned her a point or two, because when she turned the scowl to a glare, his expression softened a fraction.

“Okay.” He sighed, still looking annoyed. “Okay—maybe something slipped out—”

“What does that mean?”

“I didn’t sing to you, but a bit of it might have slipped out when you were gone, and the music is… it—it tends to find a target.”

“You put a spell on me?”

“No.” The next bite of his burger was aggressive. “If I did that, I’d have to do it on purpose.”

“So then why have I been losing sleep all week?”

“A few notes are still effective, even if they aren’t targeted. It just doesn’t strip your free will.” 

Was that the tradeoff for being rescued? Lucy supposed she could live with it if it didn't resume as soon as the merman left her sight. This could just be a small hiccup.

“...but it could?”

“I wouldn’t do that.”

It wasn’t the worst decision to trust him at his word. He did save her after all. If he wanted to harm her, there’d been plenty of unused opportunities.

“I’m sorry it happened.” He wasn’t looking at her when he said it, focused instead on clipping the parts of the burger that slipped out the back end of the bun. “It’s been a while since I’ve talked to a—human.”

Not a condemnable confession. Humans could suck. Probably to him especially, if the state of the marina was any judge. He’d taken a big risk by pulling her out of the water, by letting her see him, and Lucy wasn’t too violated by the music to hold a grudge in light of that. She set the rest of her burger aside and scrubbed her hands with a napkin.

“Um, I never did thank you for what you did.”

He raised an eyebrow. “For saving your life?”

“Thank you.”

His mouth twitched, halfway between bemused and pleased. “Don’t mention it.”

Yep, this was the single weirdest thing Lucy had ever experienced. She wasn’t tired enough to start hallucinating, but it was a funny thought to consider. For now, he’d have to be her own personal weird secret. 

“So,” She drew her knees up and laced her fingers at her ankles. “I’m uh, I’m Lucy.”

“Okay.”

“If you want to be friends, I need to know your name.”

He rolled his eyes with practiced, professional precision. She could see the exaggerated sigh pull his shoulders back. “It’s Tim.” He said, after a prolonged stint of grumbling.

“Oh—okay. That’s uh, nice.” Lucy would never admit to having expected something like Triton. Or Valdimar, or Proteus, or Neptune. Or some other merman-sounding name. Tim was so… normal. Tim was just A Guy.

Lucy ignored the amusement gleaming in his pretty predator eyes and stuck her hand straight out. “Nice to meet you, Tim.”

His grip was warm.

[ultra-raging-ghost]

Holding my hand out for adventure time au rambles!! Please do go off hehe!

SLAY okay so this idea started on one idea (bad being ice king/marcy being dapper bc i really fucking like remember me) so keep in mind i did not think abt like shipping or anything kbhvjgvhbj

so technically i have like 3 different ideas actually??

Idea 1 roles, this ones more "egg centric":

Marcy + bonnie as dapper and pomme (obv theyre siblings, not shipping the babies thats weird)

Simon as BBH, and skeppy as fucking... whats her name, betty

Sunny as flame princess and oddly enough SLIME as flame king!! I think about the "evil evil evil" candles and shit and i just giggle about it, thats so charlie

In all of these AUs i imagine tallulah as finn and chay as jake. Kinda controversial(/silly) but tallulah fits finn so much more than jake to me tbh.....

Leo as LPS. I dont take criticism shes a queen and i could see her and dapper fucking shit UP (i.e. that princess meeting episode where her and marcy fuck up a bunch of the breakfast kingdoms guards and castle)(my other candidate for this was richas) and obviously that would make foolish + vegetta her parents

As for breakfast princess, thats obviously empanada to me who else would she be

Pepito to ME is lemon hope... to ME!!!!!!!

The two lemon grabs are either Q and El q or osito and cujo.... id say q and el q tho because el q is a freak who would absolutely consume q to gain his power if given the opportunity (it wont happen bc hes too cringefail)

I like to imagine marcys dad, hunten abedeer or however you spell his name, thats kameto

and marcys mom...... pierre

I think finn's mom is phil and his dad is missa, missas too wet to EVER fit in that mans shoes (or lack of) but he is that cringefail to fuck up so hard and he'd be too bashful to go back.... horrific cubito abuse happening on my blog <3

to me germaine is ramon.... idk its just the vibe, its the hardcore vibes you gotta fuck w em, like have you seen that man? Ramon vibes

Bagi is uh!!!! whats his name!!!!! rootbeer head guy!!!! and his/her wife is tina!!!!!!! u see the vision!!!!

Idea 2:

MAJORLY THE SAME except instead of bbh as ice king, hes the tart toter

i dont know if you remember this fucking guy but god. god. god. bbh memory arc was JUST so similar to him

Idea 3, based off that cute little art i did:

BBH as marcy and pierre as PB

I imagine in this one the eggs would be mostly candy citizens, so for example dapper as peppermint butler, crunchy is pomme (if you know the lore u know how much this hurts, think abt FMA with that girl who was turned into a dog), etc.

think in this one foolish would be LSP for no reason other than i think its funny

And of course osito as simon.... and eye guy as betty/j

i had more ideas but im very tired so this is everything off the top of my head you enjoy this!!!!!

[threadsun]

Dude, I freaking SQUEAKED when I read that breeding line lol! Slowly becoming a dog toy for this ghost clown apparently, but hopefully he’ll chew on me for a while 😂 But yeah, I can see him acting more cocky when he was a teen to put out a persona that he’s a lot stronger than he actually felt (People who are insecure about their own strength or wish that they had someone who would’ve protected them from harm or want to protect others going through similar situations wind up trying to become buff and man is he BUFF), but most of it was fake to survive. When he separates himself from his old life to start fresh, he probably doesn’t want to hide who he actually is anymore, but still stays at least guarded because he fears rejection and getting hurt in multiple areas. I think his time playing the role of Sunny Day Jack was the only time he was the closest to being himself (kind, caring, sweet, charismatic, funny, maybe even a little flirty and calm) but look where that got him. Shot twice in the head by who knows, but it’s enough to solidify that being himself is the worst thing he could possibly do. Honestly, I think the positive traits of Jack ARE Joesph, he just doesn’t see it himself (of course it more amped up and slapped with a child friendly filter, but it’s still there). I can’t wait to see how you deep dive into this more in that Jack and Rory fic! GOD I love psychology lol. Speaking of, it’s understandable why Jack hasn’t been using what he’s learned from that psychologist because it wasn’t targeted towards helping Joesph and his trauma, it was based off the psychology of CHILDREN. Sure, he uses some of what he learned on his sunshine because we all are just giant kids on the inside, but with how vast the field of psychology is, you can’t just mix trauma therapy with child care. It’s like telling a doctor you have a scrap on your knee which they treat, but they don’t realize the main issue is that your leg is broken. It’s not the psychologist’s focus and therefore Joesph didn’t receive the tools or information used to specifically help himself, if that makes sense? I know I probably said it weird, but as someone who went through counseling for years for one thing, but the main issue wasn’t addressed to them so I didn’t receive the tools that would’ve actually HELPED me. That’s only because I wasn’t aware of it and he could’ve been in a similar situation too. Don’t know anything’s wrong if it’s seen as something normal. Do you think Joesph was sub-leaning because it’s what he’s used to or do you think he does enjoy it? I can see a lot of his experiences with sex not entirely being healthy or based off fear (will this blowjob be enough to pay off his rent? Can he order that burger from McDonald’s if he tries harder to please them with his dick? Will they give me love and attention if submit to them completely?) so I’m not entirely what a healthy Joesph would look like sexually. But I didn’t think about how Jack is so heavily a dom because of his experiences as Joesph. It’s such a crazy parallel honestly! Oh! I do want to mention that on the discord, the people who talked about bdsm test before mentioned that those test results are based on both Jack and Jacktor, so there’s some food for thought. Then again, I could be mistaken so don’t take it to heart! Desperate sunshine with desperate Jack leads to some very DESPERATE sexy times with heated kisses and lots of heavy petting I imagine. I think that’s definitely where the primal side truly shines, but that guy must have some earth signs in his birth chart that man’s patience is THROUGH THE ROOF. Me? I’d probably try to rip clothes the moment I’d get the chance or become a babbling mess. But him? Freaking man can STILL form coherent sentences even before he busts a load. He can still lose himself in the moment (his ahegao face and body language is a clear giveaway of what he TRULY wants. Such an expressive guy), but holding himself off long enough to let his sunshine finish first makes me believe that he’s a monk more than a clown!

-🎃

lmao I said that exact line to one of my friends once and she was like "how many clients and partners have you said that to?" Turns out online domming can make for some good lines~

Yes, exactly!! You get it!! He's just been doing whatever he can to survive and get any scrap of love and attention he possibly can, he's not a bad person! In terms of the subbing stuff, I definitely think that when he was doing survival sex work, he was often forced into a dominant role. People see a tall, strong, handsome man like him and just assume he's dominant. So people would pay him to dominate them. Which I feel like is why he'd prefer to sub with someone he loves. He wants to be the one who feels small and not in control. He wants to hand over power to someone else and let himself be used. He likes to submit because it makes him feel good to be useful to someone else! He'll dom, sure, but usually it's because his partner wants it and he wants to please. Submitting feels more deeply, authentically him. And it's a side of himself that he's not given the chance to really explore very often. Getting praised or degraded or manhandled or ordered around, they're all things that help him feel less Big And Scary, that let him be vulnerable.

And like... that vulnerability, both by being submissive and by opening up while he plays the role of Jack. Well, that might very well have been what got him killed. So when he becomes Jack, of course he's gonna fall back on domination. It's something he knows he's good at, it's a place where he feels he has control. He wants the power he lacked as Joseph. Even when he was dominant as Joseph, he never had true power, and that's what Jack craves.

Oh Jack has insane patience and self control. Which, given that his whole thing is moderation, kind makes sense. He knows that the payoff is better if you wait and make sure everything is set up perfectly before you act. So he can wait as long as he needs to get his Sunshine completely wrapped around his finger. He can hold himself together while they fall apart for him, and then use that as leverage to make them want him more. And then once he finally has his Sunshine for certain, that's when he can let go and lose his composure.

[77ngiez-archive]

basil and kiibo for the ask game

babil…:)

favorite thing about them the love he has for his friends and his photography themes! the way he takes photos of the things hes most afraid of losing.. augh..

least favorite thing about them not abt him as a person per se but i hate hate haaate yandere characterizations of him. shut up go away!!!

favorite line "these are all our memories together.. they’re a little sad now.. but we should be glad they happened" top 10 lines that break me

brOTP him and kim should be friends full stop

OTP SUNFLOWER CACTIFLOWER SUNKISSED. also i CAN like photobomb On Occasion but im verrryy picky abt it.

nOTP generally i dislike photobomb.. also i dont like kimsil. sir that is a gay man and a lesbian

random headcanon during the fight thing he pulled out sunny’s eye with his bare hands, as opposed to just cutting it with his garden shears like the majority of the fandom thinks he did (is this based off my kin mems? yes. shut up-)

unpopular opinion see the least favorite thing… also i wish people wouldn’t act like it was """creepy""" for him to have the idea to fake mari’s suicide. guy was clearly mentally ill from a young age + he was trying to protect sunny! stop trying to make him out to be a weirdo or a yandere or whatever

song i associate with them community gardens by the scary jokes (my friend recommended this song to me the other day and. yeah. babil song)

favorite picture of them i love how happy he looks here :]

kiibz

favorite thing about them i loove his intensity <3 love how invested he is in everything he tries

least favorite thing about them the "robophobic" thing bugs me because its clearly meant to be a homo/transphobic joke on sjws or whatever

favorite line "my status as a robot does not mean i am capable of performing superhuman feats! my vision is somewhat poor, and i only possess average physical strength and intelligence!" LOOK AT THIS FREAK /AFF

brOTP him and chihiro are fun! in my human kiibo au i hc them as stepsibs. also i like him and tenko or him and kaede

OTP SAIIBO. FULL STOP. kiinaga (is that their ship name?) is cute as well.

nOTP kiiruma… chiibo…

random headcanon worlds first autistic robot

unpopular opinion let him have hobbies and be weird and stop reducing his characterization to robot jokes.. this is an issue w the fandom in general but it’s especially prevalent towards v3 characters and kiibs is no exception. ALSO WRITE HIS NAME AS KIIBO AND NOT KEEBO YOU FUCKING COWARDS-

song i associate with them ik i already said this for chihiro but! digital/physical heart by vane :] and the disappearance of hatsune miku by

favorite picture of them

[deathbypufferfish]

Recurring things in my dreams because I just need to get it out of my system. Like I am constantly back here to the point I'm like "fuck this again" when I dream it again.

It's the zombie apocalypse AGAIN (I'm with the walking dead guys). I am amazing at shooting zombies.

I can float and no one thinks it's even a little bit cool. I've dreamt this for as long as I can remember. To the extent that I forget that is not real.

Skiing I'm always skiing I don't ski but I'm convinced I can ski now.

The weirdest longest narrowest public bathrooms ever.

I'm at a water park! Oh God I forgot to shave my bikini line. Half of it is standing in line getting into the park?? There is an air of danger to the water park.

I'm just buying souvenirs at Disneyland. Usually pirate stuff or christmas ornaments.

At CVS but they have REALLY cool stuff just for ME!

Buying Japanese blind boxes for like $1 each and I never open the goddamn things in the dream.

Buying beanie babies that do not exist at thrift shops! yippee!

This very specific concept for a sims world and it's starting to get to me. New England coast vibes. There's a boardwalk with half rabbitholes (movie theatre, bookshop) and half visit-able shops. There is a roller rink in the center. downtown is old brick buildings and there's small little apartments in them. BASEMENT apartments too. The brick apartment buildings are centered around one long main street instead of a neighborhood. You can own a business in one of the storefronts. There are fruit vendors, a grocery store, and other rabbit hole shops along the main street.

I'm in an elevator in a really big hotel and I don't know my floor OR room number.

Petting bears .

A super cool magical world and oh god I have to save everyone and there's a conspiracy.

Genuine horrors!

Hiking through a big forest with big streams and at some point we gotta run out of there parkour style because a big magical goo is coming.

Climbing this huge snowy mountain (usually with my mom or friends) and there is a tiny cabin at the top and a beautiful statue garden. It is very peaceful.

I'm in Skyrim and I'm stealing these rich bad guys lodge aw man I can't live here what the fuck I did this quest for nothing.

Beating up guys from my highschool.

Walking around this huge mansion/museum but we can't go to the top floor because the king is sleeping there..

I'm in a shitty arcade connected to my local movie theater that does NOT exist and also it is so shitty and the prizes suck.

God I'm in a Mario game and I have to do parkour fuck.

I forgot my bikini top on vacation so I just swim without one and I think everyone is looking at me but they do not give one shit.

Fancy beautiful wonderful showers ohohoho and I take a great shower OH SHIT I GOT WATER EVERYWHERE.

Exploring my grandma's old house but its a weird mansion with bathrooms that have little stairs going up to the toilet right under the ceiling and also the bathrooms are carpeted.

There is this giant secret part to my grandma's old house. Historical shit.

The freezer is filled with gas station ice cream yippee!!!!!!

I'm driving a car oh my god I can't drive oh and I'm driving from the passenger seat??????? How am I doing this?????? Whatever it's on autopilot I'm fine. I hope a cop does not see me driving this car from the passenger seat.

There's an apple orchard in my old town (there isn't).

I'm just trying to find the bathroom in this freak combination of all the schools I've been to someone help me.

Oh I found the school locker room oohh now I'm in a big open-air area in a barn??? Warehouse???? It's so sunny and warm and there's all these wooden stalls for outdoor showers yippee!!!!!

I'm getting fast food with my friends. I accidently order three sandwiches. I'm severely distressed over this.

I'm at the mall and I am looking at all the tasty snacks (great ice cream and coffee selections) and trying to find a hot topic oh no I'm lost.

QUICK TO THE ESCAPE POD ON THIS SPACESHIP.

I'm in a musical or dance recital and I do NOT know ANY of my lines or ANY choreography and I just have to wing it and NO ONE seems to notice.

THERE'S THIS HUGE T-SHIRT STORE. IT'S JUST T-SHIRTS BUT THEY'RE ALL THE WEIRD THRIFTED ONES I LOVE. I NEVER GET TO GO IN.

I'm at my Babushka's apartment building but it is 3 of them attached to each other and it's dystopian and scary.

I'm speaking Russian (I have not spoken Russian since I was like three and it wasn't even a lot).

I'm trying to break in to my elementary school (let me in).

I'm on a huge oh my god gigantic playground jungle gym I am going to die if I fall.

oh hey it's my sims hey you guys.

oh hey it's the munch story sims hey you guys.

sometimes I think I'm just walking through a wetland and that's it. Unclear if I am a wetland creature or not.

I'm sneaking through my ex-friend's house (SOMETIMES invisible)

Triple bunk beds

there's so much more but i can't morally make this post longer thank you for listening. Um tag yourself.

[platinummice]

Here with some questions to keep you busy :>

For Archer: 🍍🍑🍓🌽🍹🍻

And Django: 🍇🍆🍰🎂🍫🍷

🙏🙏🙏 bless

Archer:

🍍: Where does your OC feel most comfortable?

Arch can be comfortable in most places as long as hes not alone. If any part of his little pack is with him, then it’s no big deal where he is. For maximum comfort though? Definitely in the Safari park, surrounded by all of his pack, and where his friends are usually close by.

🍑: What sort of traits does your OC look for in a Significant Other?

Well I don’t quite know that he looks for anything in particular? He’s not the kind of guy to actively look for a partner, his relationship with Mason was kinda,,, stumbled upon? After he taught the man not to abuse animals for fun at least. And even then I’d say it was more Arch just kinda hanging out and also Mason was there. He does like that Mason doesn’t treat him weird when his mental illness gets the better of him. No babying, no acting like he’s a freak or anything crazy like that. Mason takes his breakdowns in stride and that’s probably the first thing that makes Arch go ‘….oh’. I guess the answer is Arch doesn’t look for anything in particular, he just stumbles into things.

🍓: Does your OC have any particular scents they like? Or hate?

Wet dog is a very weird but comforting scent to him. In general animal smells that most people would find offensive he gets good vibes from. He doesn’t like the smell of still water.

🌽: How does this OC feel about acts of affection? What's their favourite act of affection, physical or emotional?

He definitely thinks it’s strange at first, affection. He’s spent a good long time never getting any affection at all, and he learns a LOT from his first dog, Pup. She was a super affectionate puppy and never left Arch’s side. My man definitely loves puppy kisses. It’s even longer before he gets affection from other people? And I think mostly it’s mostly verbal and kinda scoffed out (to be fair all of his people friends are raiders and/or tough people who have been through a lot, i don’t think Arch even knows what a hug is when he meets Gage and I don’t know who would even teach him hugs lol). Once he knows hugs are a thing you KNOW he’s hugging people all the damn time. He will never have enough hug.

🍹: Does your OC have any funny anecdotes told about them?

Hm I don’t know if it counts but there’s definitely a little story passed around the raiders about some violent murders that happened after some people messed with his dogs.

🍻: What's your OC's favourite comfort ritual? How do they calm themselves down after a rough day?

You’ll find the man laying face down in the puppy pen just getting trampled by lil doggies. That or laying in a sunny spot with Ranger and Fletcher.

Django:

🍇: What sort of friend are they? Where are they in the group dynamic?

Django is that loud friend who sees you walk into the building and yell out “HEEY (insert name) IS HERE!!” And he doesn’t do it to embarrass people but is just genuinely excited to see them. He’s the one that will ask any dumb questions you have if you’re too embarrassed to ask yourself.

🍆: Does your OC have any favourite form of affection, physical or otherwise?

Man is a whore for hand holding. Also just uh gently touching his arm or back? Oop he’s a puddle.

🍰: What's something your OC counts as unforgivable?

Any kind of child abuse.

🎂: Has your OC have any contradictory interests or traits to the first preception people have of the? How do they surprise people?

Mm probably the most surprising thing about him is his psycobuff addiction. When he’s around the BoS he makes sure he’s well put together, that you can’t tell anything is wrong. But when he’s in the commonwealth he loses almost all of his wit and charisma. Once Barlowe is assigned to him he has to be more careful about it, and that’s when he starts to crack.

🍫: Where does your OC go to think?

Anywhere where there’s some water. Still water, moving water, it doesn’t matter. He finds it very comforting either way.

🍷: What's one of your OC's pet peeves concerning food?

I’m honestly so happy that you asked this because Django’s whole thing when he came to the commonwealth was to make sure his squadron was well fed. He studied any information he could find on what foods would be available to them locally before they were shipped out and he took his job very very seriously. With that being said his biggest pet peeve is unseasoned food. There are so many options for flavoring and seasonings in the commonwealth and when he sees people not using them it drives him nuts.

[joytraveler]

Joy Traveler: Screen 5

(Sunday, August 9, 2015)

normalnancy: hi magic -*-MAGIC_*_ hi who are you Llord_Kuruku: Hope Bea shows up soon HNV: Geez, who even are all these people? anthony1998x: an1 here from cali say yo normalnancy: hi lord kurku normalnancy: hi hnv berd_snerglar: She's usually on by now wtf. GlockRoach: u think she got freaked out aroseahorseboy: nah, bea has enviable chill

Bea arrives at last, looking a little worn. "Son of a bee it's been kind of a crazy night but okay. All good now, thanks for waiting! Had a little drama in the hive"

"BEA YOU FORGOT TO FEED THE DOGS!" "...hang on.."

anthony1998x: wtf r your parents here??? HNV: Dude, she's a millennial, we ALL live with our parents. Llord_Kuruku: ohmygodareyoufuckingserious. bea you have to show us the dogs aroseahorseboy: doggiiiiies

"Okay! Ready, my swarm!" She returns. "No, no, get down! You got wet paws! Out! I need an actual studio for this or something instead of just my nerd room, don't I"

"Welcome once again to Press Bea, picking up with Joy Traveler, part 5, and things have been...weird. We had Box Baby 2 and learned more about the Spanunkos and I haven't gone any further.. yet. It's tempting but I want to plumb the mysteries of this machine with my hive by my side! No I'm not scared!"

normalnancy: hi bea DueyDecimal: This gets more awesome every episode you guys, seriously calm down and watch bug_snuggler: bea can you play some of the actual good games you have GlockRoach: Dude you gotta stop changing your name every time, pick one. pick that one. Syrupentine: Everyone calm down, Bea can play what she wants... which is going to be more Planet of Pisces, right??

"Well I was thinking, I'll pick one to start and then you guys can pick the next, seems to work out pretty well most of the time"

DueyDecimal: I like that. aroseahorseboy: buckle up buzzers

Screen 5 shows a pastoral scene with a sunny field, a swimming hole, and a tree with a tire swing! Seated in front are two children, a boy and a girl, holding hands with their backs to the camera. In the sky appear the names of the 12 games for this screen:

49: Berry Batty 50: Teddy Bear Ballet 51: Impact Crate 52: Pralines & Cream 53: Whack-O Golf 54: Planet of Pisces 2: For Super Players 55: Kaveman 56: Crosswalk 57: Whirlwind Football 58: Fuzzed 59: Cat Rate 60: Sunny Spring Mornings

aroseahorseboy: is... is that... Syrupentine: omg omg omg POP2!!! Llord_Kuruku: HOLY SHHIIIIIIIII HNV: It's a trap! Play the last one, that's got to be a fakeout!

"Ok I know what you guys are thinking, and it IS a weird order but I don't think that really means anything. Crosswalk just sounds dull but we've though that before.. Oh you know what's boring? Golf!"

Syrupentine: ...Golf. DueyDecimal: God has forsaken us. snug_buggler: guys we can leave til the boring is over. why u hate us bea?

"Remember what this game did to soccer? And cooking? And other sports? Cooking is a sport you can't tell me otherwise"

HNV: Oh shit, you know what shows up in sports games, right? Llord_Kuruku: ...Spanunko time? HNV: Totally Spanunko time!

"DANGIT, how could I forget. Sure they're evil undead abominations but who can resist the thrill of competition..."

DueyDecimal: And they barf evil tapeworms! aroseahorseboy: my my yes it would be a shame to ever forget that