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#sunflowers and illusions
windmills123 · 2 years
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idk what to draw anymore so here's some fanart for the scene of all time ^ - ^
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fangsanddaggers · 10 months
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Tag dump
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thecupidwitch · 6 months
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Planetary Magick🌙
Sun
Zodiac: Leo
Metal: Gold
Day: Sunday
Colors: organge, yellow, amber
Stones: Amber, topaz, ruby, diamond
Tarot: The Sun
Herbs: Angelica, poppy, sunflower, marigold, hibiscus, mistletoe
Symbols: lion, hexagram, sparrow hawk, dragon, head, heart, swan
Influences: renown, potency, fortune, tyranny, pride, ambition, masculinity, arrogance, bigotry, vitality, health
Moon
Zodiac: cancer
Metal: sliver
Day: Monday
Colors: blue, sliver
Stones: moonstone, pearl
Tarot: The High Priestess, The Chariot
Herbs: eucalyptus, coconut, jasmine, lotus, myrrh, sandalwood
Symbols: bow and arrow, crab, cat, turtle, Sphinx, owl
Influences: gradtitufe, friendliness, safe, travel, physical health, wealth, protection for enemies, deception, illusion, women, emotions, healing, dreams
Mercury
Zodiac: Virgo, Gemini
Metal: aluminum, Mercury
Day: Wednesday
Colors: violet, gray, purple, indigo, yellow
Stones: opal agate
Tarot: The Lovers
Herbs: hyssop, juniper, betony, carrot, chickweed
Symbols: wand, octagram, the mind
Influences: good fortune, gratitude, gain, memory, understanding, divination, dreams, forgetfulness, communication, business, cleverness, creativity, information, intellect, memory, perception, science, wisdom, gambling, writing, root of dishonesty, deception
Venus
Zodiac: taurus, libra
Metal: copper
Day: Friday
Colors: green, pink
Stones: turquoise, emerald, sapphire, jade
Tarot: The Empress
Herbs: jimsonweed, violet, rose, alder, apple, angelica, olive, sesame
Symbols: sparrow, dove, swan, pentagram
Influences: peace, agreements, cooperation, fertility, joy, love, good fortune, jealousy, strife, promiscuity
Mars
Zodiac: aries, scorpio
Metal: iron, red brass, steel
Day: Tuesday
Color: Red
Stones: ruby, garnet, bloodstone, diamond
Tarot: The Tower
Herbs: ginger, mustard
Symbols: sword, pentagram, horse, bear, wolf, vulture
Influences: war, victory, judgements, submission of enemies, bleeding, stripping one of rank, harness, discord, conflict, aggression, lust, power, courage, goals, protection, motivation, ambition, strength
Jupiter
Zodiac: pisces, sagittarius
Metal: tin
Day: Thursday 
Colors: blue
Stone: sapphire
Tarot: The Wheel of Fortune
Herbs: balm, hyssop, maple leaf and bark, oak, sage, dandelion root
Symbols: eagle, dolphin
Influences: gains, riches, favor, peace, cooperation, appeasing enemies, dissolving
Saturn
Zodiac: capricorn
Metal: lead
Day: Saturday
Color: black
Stone: onyx
Taror: The World
Herbs: alder, apple, ash, asparagus, baneberry, belladonna, distort, hellebore, blackthorn, corm, cypress
Symbols: cuttlefish, mole
Influences: safety, power, success, positive response to requests, intellect, causes discord, strips honor, melancholy
Uranus
Zodiac: aquarius
Day: Thursday
Colors: blue-green, electric blue
Stones: quartz, labradorite, blue topaz, amber, amethyst, garnet, diamond
Tarot: The Fool
Herbs: clover, pokeweed, snowdrop, foxglove, love, rosemary, trees of heaven, hellebore, morning glory, sage, wintergreen, orchids, sweet woodruff
Symbols: dragonfly, butterfly
Influences: breaking connection, sudden and unexpected change, freedom, originality, radical and revolutionary ideas, enlightenment, equality, individuality, rebellion, instability, loneliness, boredom, mistrust of self
Neptune
Zodiac: pisces
Minerals: coral, aquamarine, platinum, neptunium
Colors: green, blue, lavender
Tarot: The Hanged Man
Herbs: morning glory, night-blooming jasmine, pine, water lily
Symbols: the sea, Trident, the spine
Influences: dissolving boundaries, expanding upon ideas, changing established rules, intuition, idealism, sacrifice, glamour, illusion, evolution, decay, visions, art, healing, inspiration, dreams, creativity, compassion, drifting from reality, carelessness, stubbornness, absent mind
Pluto
Zodiac: scorpio
Metal: plutonium, tin chrome, steel
Day: Tuesday
Colors: maroon, dark red, purple, white, black
Stones: snowflake obsidian, clack tourmaline
Tarot: Judgement
Herbs: pomegranate, rosemary, vanilla, basil, poppies, belladonna, foxglove
Symbols: Phoenix, snake, scorpion, fox, eagle
Influences; destruction making way for renewal, rebirth, knowledge, spirituality, transformation, destiny, the subconscious, desire, arrogance, death, obsession, destruction
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video-game-jams · 6 months
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Mother 3 - Sunflowers and Illusions
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xoxoxoazuraoxoxox · 2 months
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🌼🌻🌼
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C'mere, Love
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Pairing: Captain John Price x Reader
Potentially a 3 part series 👀
Summary: John is your man, he's everything you ever wanted in a partner and more, he's loving and he's consistent. And part of that consistency is saying those words that you love.
(No use of y/n or mention of gender/race)
warnings: Mostly fluff with illusions to smut at the end.
-💕-
You love it when he says those two words. Those words that are capable of pulling an innumerable range of emotions from you depending on the way he says them, where he says them. He sows them like a seasoned gardener that knows exactly how to get his yield. John always says -
C’mere, Love.
A burst of sparks jolted down your spine the first time he’d said them to you - on your second date. All those years ago. 
You’d both decided to go on a hike, it seemed so romantic and adventurous at the time, going far up into the hills and not quitting before you reached the top. Adventurous and also a little aspirational on your part. You wanted to seem tough, felt like you had to prove to the Captain - at that time Lieutenant - that you weren’t a weakling and that you could hike for six hours with no sweat. As if you’d kid him when you were breathing like a ten year old pug when you reached that godforsaken summit. 
Despite the difficulty you’d had traversing the hill, and pug breath aside, it was incredibly pretty at the top. The setting sun looked gorgeous in the grainy pictures you took on your phone and it was lovely to sit for a moment and bask in the fading sunflower glow. However, the sunset wasn’t so pretty on your way down - or rather your mood wasn’t.
He’d asked you earlier in the day if you were sure about leaving at the time you’d suggested, and you’d boldly (naively) said it would be fine and that you’d pack a big hoodie for when it got cold. Before long, the sky had fretted between every shade of blue and had settled on navy, punishing you with a deep chill for staying out once it fully darkened. It had you chattering your teeth and folding your arms around yourself into a clacking human pretzel, cursing the shadowy heather bushes and rocky outcrops as you walked down the endless decline. 
“Are you alright?” He’d asked, huffing a little as he took a steep step down from a boulder.
You were coming to realise that very little phased John. So when you’d turned to him and saw him smiling down at you, with his breath intact and his body unflinching as he walked, as if you were walking by the Seine in June, you almost screamed. Almost.
You proudly managed to hold yourself back for a few moments, bottling up all your grievances like your friends had sagely advised you should when you said you were hiking with the elite soldier. You even tried to nod and go back to walking, trying to continue on the high road without all the atrocious whining you wanted to do, but he gently grasped your shoulder and made you face him. He tipped his head forward at you, furrowing that already heavy brow of his at you as if to say ‘it’s ok, be honest with me’ and waited for your honest response. 
“No,” you whimpered.
Your eyes welled hot with tears, by some miracle they didn’t spill over, but you could feel every ache and pain in all your joints compounding and suddenly it started feeling like you were climbing down Everest. Your mind conjured up an insurmountable journey filled with cold and bone-ache and spiralled ever closer to turning you into an unattractive little brat. It was then that you’d vowed to never climb another hill over 1000 feet ever again. 
“I thought not,” he chuckled to himself, smoothing his roughened hand over the back of your neck. “C’mere, love.”
You jumped when he said it. It sounded like how a rich chocolate dessert tastes when you take the first bite, it made you forget all about the terrible hill and transported you to another place entirely. He had such a grizzly deep voice even in those younger days, affected deeply by his lifelong smoking habit that somehow failed to catch up with his lungs, it made you swoon. You faded into him, mind going fuzzy as he drew you close, close enough that his scratchy beard grazed your forehead (a beard that was yet to be chopped to muttons), and rubbed his arms up and down your back.
“You’re alright, aren’t you? You just need to get back to the car and get warm again. Not long to go, just stick close with me, ok,” he reassured you, his warm breaths tickling at your ear. 
At that moment you’d have gladly taken to mountain living. You wanted to say that you could forget all about the car and settle for lying under a bush if it meant that you could stay locked in his embrace. You could bury your face into his shoulder and he could curl his body around you and you’d breathe in the smell of cigarettes and spring fresh laundry detergent all night until dawn broke.
However you decided against saying all that, because you didn’t want him to think you were fucking mental. 
“Here, take this,” he said.
You gawped as he drew away from you and took off his big thick hoodie, bestowing it onto you in your bewildered state. You were about to protest and say how terrible you’d feel taking it off of him, but he gave you another serious look again - one you imagined he gave to the men in his command - and you bit your lip instead. 
You were glad you did too, because once you’d shimmied into it, you were warm as a bear and almost as big. The heavy fabric hung loose on you and swallowed your hands, but nevertheless he fished your left one out of the sleeve and took it in his, restarting the journey all over again.
He wasn’t even a little put out by the lack of coverage on his body, his grip was loose on you rather than taught and shivering and that vague smile of his didn’t break from his lips. It made you want to burst out laughing, you’d wondered who this man was, if they’d grown him in a lab or something and set him loose on the world. Why the hell had he asked you on a second date? You were so…average, you couldn’t even do a single hill walk for god’s sake!
“I take it this will be the final date then?” you’d joked, nervously vomiting the words before you could stop yourself. 
“What makes you say that?” He asked, his voice wavering a little. 
“Because you’ve just had to coddle a grown adult in walking down a little hill,” you sighed, feeling the full weight of your patheticism bear down on you. “And you’re - y’know - you.”
The tension in his arm dropped, you could feel his hand loosen on you as you gave your explanation. He took the hill like a champ, but apparently the idea of not seeing you again was a feat.
“What does that mean?” he laughed.
“You know what it means! You’re like…a big rugged soldier man that’s super fit and- and- capable and handsome and knows how to do lots of stuff,” you said, completely letting go of your filter and waving your free arm around for emphasis. 
“Come off it,” he snorted, giving you a playful nudge. “If I wanted someone that was ‘super fit’ and good at hill walking I wouldn’t bother leaving the base, darlin’. I wanted to go out with you again because I like you, ya dafty. I agreed to come out here, at what we can now safely agree was a stupid time, because I thought you really liked stuff like this.”
“I only suggested it because I thought you liked stuff like this,” you gasped. “You don’t stuff like this?”
“I like walking enough, would just prefer not to do it for six hours,” he said with a grin. “I get enough of shit like this at work.”
“Jesus god, that’s a relief,” you sighed, safe in the knowledge you wouldn’t be reliving your current trauma. 
“Does that mean you want to see me again?” He asked, raising an eyebrow.
“I think I’d allow it,” you say in pretend thought. “Probably sometime after the months it’ll take to recover from this.”
“Months? God, I’ll have to cancel that trip to the Andes I’d planned for us!”
“Shut it!”
“No seriously, I’ve pre rented llamas and everythin’, I even got you the appropriate footwear, unlike what you’re wear- hey!”
You’d slapped his arm playfully and rolled your eyes, attempting to get him to stop making fun of you, but you only served to light a fire in him instead. He made some comment about how once you engage in battle, neither party can step down until defeat or surrender and then you’d said something about running away. Then you’d proceeded to chase each other down the hill like children, giggling and shoving with careless abandon. 
In any case, though, he’d distracted you from the cold. He’d made you laugh. He made you forget about all the gripes and groans you could’ve moaned to your friends and family for hours about, and he’d filled you with smiles and hot flashing sparks instead.
The third date had gone even better, and then the one after that, and so on until something over a month had flown by. You were in a state of bliss, everyone made fun of you for how cheesy and disney-princess-like you’d become, but you couldn’t help it, you were so happy. 
Everyday since you’d met him was like a fairytale, until the day he’d turned up to your door with a huge bouquet of flowers and a gravely serious look on his face, you’d never remembered being so depthlessly mad before.
You’d gone from smiling and breezy to panicky and despairing all at once. You’d made him a pie from scratch and had been so proud of yourself, making sure to dress up in his favourite outfit of yours, that he’d said he loved and had done everything to ensure that his return from work would be perfect. Though once you’d seen his face and the way he was nervously scratching his fingers through his rough spikes of hair, you’d started to feel like an idiot. 
Is he breaking up with me? Has he done something terrible? Has he done something terrible and he’s breaking up with me? Oh my god, he’s gone and shagged someone while he’s been away and now this is his way of telling me. That bastard, that no good-
“Can I come in, love?” He said awkwardly, trying to conjure up a smile. 
The smile didn’t look right, it made him look queasy. It seemed as though he'd be over the toilet in a few moments more. It made you harden your stare at him and clamp your hand onto your doorframe, white knuckling it like a paper skinned crone. 
“That depends,” you said icily. “What have you done?”
“What have I-? What do you mean what have I done?” he laughed, those azure eyes of his sparkling at you. 
“What do you mean ‘what do i mean’? You’ve got a face like a storm cloud and you’ve brought me flowers - which you’ve never done before - which means you’ve got something awful to tell me. So you know what? Out with it, because I’m not gonna let you in and have you trying to console me after whatever it is you’re going to tell me!”
He paused for a moment, stunned like a deer that’s just spotted something in the thickets, but regained his composure, gripping the flowers in both hands now. He even managed to do that thing that made you dizzy sometimes - that thing where he tilts his head at you and quirks his brow, staring intensely with those lovely blue eyes of his.
“I hope I don’t have to console you after I tell you what I came to say, means I won’t get the answer I’m looking for,” he murmured. “Can I just come in and I’ll explain myself without all your nosy neighbours watching?”
“No! Out here, out with it, now,” you said, snapping out of your stupor. 
His eyes could be weapons all of their own.
He sighed and shook his head, genuinely grinning to himself. He was smiling the same way he had when you’d told him he’d look stupidly handsome no matter how long his facial hair was when he’d had to shave it for a wedding. The way he did when you did or said something that was so you. 
“It’s just- well…shit,” he sighed, trying to get a hold on his words (which only made your heart pound faster knowing he was never one to be unsure of himself) “I just wanted to say that you’re you’re really special to me and I don’t think there’s anyone like you in the world. And since we’ve been seeing each other a while now, I just wanted to ask if you’d like to…officially be together. Like a couple.”
You gawked at him.
Time had frozen and you were stuck in an endless replaying loop, having to think hard on his words before you could really comprehend them. You knew your face was probably stuck on an ugly confused expression, but that couldn't even begin to cross your mind when you had so much to consider. 
“Love?” John asked nervously, the plastic of the silly bouquet squeaking as his grip shifted. 
“Oh my god…” you murmured, finally putting your fears to rest. “Get in here!” 
You dove out of the doorway like a shark and yanked him into your lair by the arm. He stumbled in after you and in his confusion you were able to grab the flowers from him and toss them onto the stairs, leaving his hands free to hold you. And hold you they did, he gripped you like he’d been away from you for years. 
“I thought you were going to tell me you fucking cheated on me, you bastard!” You cursed, words muffling into his chest.
“What? Why would you think that!”
“Because of the way you showed up like- like- Jesus fucking Christ, you can’t turn up at someone’s door with a serious face like that and a big guilty fucking bouquet!” You said, laughing almost manically as all your fears were buried. “You’re some man, John!”
“I was nervous, love! I couldn’t help it,” He chuckled, stroking a hand over your head and planting a kiss over the smoothed hair.
“Well, now you know to explain yourself before I see you look like that again,” you sighed, finally breaking away from him so that you could kiss his stubbly cheek. “I feel like I’m recovering from a heart attack.”
“Noted, I’ll fix my face in future…However, i can’t say that I feel much better, cause you haven’t answered my question yet,” he said breathily. 
You blinked stupidly up at him and breathed out. Oh yes. You’d forgotten all about his little proposal in the light of your relief, and it all came rushing to your face at once, heating your cheeks like stewing apples. 
“I’m so sorry! You tried to do something so nice there and I thought you’d done something horrible and I ruined it. Crap! Right - hold on! Now… Ask me again.” 
John’s eyes were wide and his jaw dropped a little, you’d somehow managed to stun him. There was a heat in the hair, like you’d struck a match, something zipped through you both. It was probably the knowledge that your relationship was going to change. It had you shaking a little and him fumbling with his hands. 
You stood away from John and readjusted yourself, rolling your shoulders and testing a smile on your face. By the time you were finished getting into position, he looked like he’d recovered and was pursing his lips. He was looking at you in his John way. He looked at you with that ‘you’re in-fucking-corregible’ look. 
Nevertheless, he dutifully marched over to the stairs and grabbed the forgotten flowers - roses you noticed now that you weren’t furious with him - red as a bleeding heart, and clutched them to his chest again. Though this time he looked happy, his eyes were shimmering like an ocean in the tropics. 
He said your name, low and growly. Confident.
“Would you like to officially be with me?”
You gave it a second, letting the fake and real excitement swirl in your eyes, giving him a moment of suspense. Really you just needed to catch your breath. 
“Yes,” you murmured. “Yes, yes, yes!”
“Thank Christ! C’mere, love.”
And he was holding you close once more, roses planted into your back, his chest pressed into your face. It was like fireworks were going off all around you, with the way you felt. Then as you thought it, you registered just how nervous he must’ve been, his heart was beating like a war drum, it was so loud and thunderous, rammed right against your ears. Though, it comforted you as it settled and took on its familiar rhythm, and you felt your own chest lighten too. You both rested in each others arms, breathing contendly in peace.
“I made dinner for us,” you finally said.
Your voice was barely there, dinner was more of an afterthought now. The smell of pie less enticing as you were held close to your man. Your official man. He must’ve thought along the same lines too. 
“You know I love your cooking, darlin’,” he breathed, nuzzling into your hair, “but that’s not what I’m after right now. I think I’m hungry for something else.”
You squeaked as his admission and suddenly the mood had changed. The air was sucked from your lungs and your body started to practically vibrate with excitement. You were familiar with John’s hunger. You knew what that entailed, knew what he would become, knew what you would become. 
Cat and mouse. Captain and Captive. Rogue and Princess. There were lots of games you liked to play with each other, though It was all the same either way, no matter what ridiculous scenario you both liked to invent. It had one objective. 
You sprang away from him like a livewire and ran upstairs, squealing with a grin as you heard his growl. Your footsteps pounded up the stairs, loud and clumsy, his very carefully stepped up, purposeful and precise. You were already halfway to the bedroom before you heard him from the creaky step, the one in the middle that he liked to put all of his towering weight onto. 
“C’mere, love,” he called, voice low and raspy, eliciting an excited gasp from you. “You’re mine now, love. You’re all mine!”
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pallisia · 9 months
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the climax is so so so so good i replayed the whole game 4 times already just to see it (and i'll do it again. i can't be stopped) also the music slaps so hard i can't wait for an official release. i'm curious which tracks were yours and what kind of directions you gave for the ones toby did.
anyway, congrats for soulsov real, it may be only a couple hours long but it's already so impactful and i can't wait to see what's next !!
thanks so much! i'm excited to release the soundtrack eventually. for now, here's a proper songlist and more detailed credits (warning for vague spoilers):
title - "Prelude" (GGDG) whisper - "Whisper" (GGDG) loic - "Words in Lavender" (Toby Fox, GGDG) sadgirl - "Small Theme for a Sad Girl" (GGDG, Toby Fox) snowfall - "Snowfall" (GGDG, Toby Fox) loic_magic - "Fayim's Gift" (Toby Fox) hollow - "Hollow Temple" (Toby Fox) ysme_slow - "Master of Illusion" (Toby Fox) creepy - "Unease" (Toby Fox) sage_tension, sage_tension2 - "Frenzied Rite" (Toby Fox) loiclia - "Sunflowers" (Toby Fox) ysme_normal - "Normal Theme for a Normal Woman" (Toby Fox) lamp_7 - "Lamplight" (GGDG) sage_2, sage_pre - "Sage Invocation" (GGDG, Toby Fox) ysme_god - "Light and Hunger" (Toby Fox) end_2 - "Soul Tether" (GGDG, Toby Fox) whis2 - "Prayer to the Builder" (GGDG)
if my name is listed first, that means i composed an early version, then toby took it from there.
the general direction we went in with was "ps1 rpg," but i ended up taking a lot of influence from ffxi in my own compositions ("snowfall" in particular.)
for loic's theme, toby originally made "sunflowers" (the version that plays in the flashback) but i thought it sounded too warm and positive for general use, so i composed the minor-key version that you hear at the start.
"sage invocation" is my favorite of the tracks i composed. there was a weak, filler-y piano part in my original version, but toby replaced it with something much nicer.
"light and hunger" was the main track i wanted toby to take the reins on from start to finish. basically the only direction i gave was "kefka + sleazy casino music" and he knocked it out of the park.
those are the biggest points i can think of! it was such a joy working together on this soundtrack and i'm looking forward to more.
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fairyrona · 15 days
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What's wrong? Rainbow.
Okay this post is a little of a brain vomit, because I've read so many smart posts lately and I have some thoughts that kinda tie into all of them or maybe provide some pieces.
So, let's add some maybe fresh thoughts. If somebody had already said all that, please step forth lmao
First, the Zombie Boy drawing and different/changing timelines. (and project rainbow) For For context, @willbyersabyss 's post.
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S1 version mentioning the mind control experiments.
-> completely erasing that timeline/version of events by the said mind control. -> And now Will Byers has become the Zombie Boy
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It's almost unbelivable how much timeline-wrongness/loops S2 hides under it's sleeve.
Trapped in an artificially created time loop / timeline.
What's wrong with Mama? Rainbow. Timeline's wrong.
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Oh, what you say Nancy-in-Terry's overcoat/costume?
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Murray's? But not yours?
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Oh, then what if Murray's timeline?
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Zombie Boy version. The one that says Will got lost in the woods. Our timeline. And then we get Lucas telling Max the truth. (Events of s1, that represent the Zombie Boy version.) But on this particular timeline-train of thoughts, he literally repeats after Nancy:
Will didn't get lost in the woods. The timeline's wrong.
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And then it get's even more messy, because Max thinks this story feels derivative. This is literally us reading the s1 article. But then, why is she reacting to the s2 version like that?
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And then she calls him out for lying. We get told multiple times, that Lucas is not telling the true version of events.
Friends don't lie. Never ever. No matter what. Is that right? Then how do you explain this?
Out of order. The timeline is wrong. Out of order.
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Friends don't lie. Never ever. No matter what. Is that right? Then how do you explain this?
Now, lets go back a little. And add some MKUltra.
What's wrong with mama? Rainbow. Timeline's wrong. Out of order.
I don't think I've seen anyone mention the fact that we've got not 1, not 2, but at least 3 Rainbow Rooms.
terry ives' mind loop (with different colour-gradings)
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Ray's, the lab ward's home in Chicagoproject nina tape-based memories project nina tape-based memories (with different colour-gradings)
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While we're at HNL colour grading I wanna quickly add that Terry's sequences are a lot warmer, I'd even say the walls are different paint all together. But it could just visual clue of time passing, renovations and all.
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However. It's a cool detail that while Terry's memories are warm-ish-> turn greenish just as it cuts to little Jane and Kali and then the lighting immediately becomes cold - like in Will's scenes. (And Ray's, ''true'' version is warm as well. Outside of the girls nightgowns, that are more cool-toned. and that's another mindfuckery detail, bc Ray's kids are dressed more like lab subjects than the lab subjects.) (out of order)
I wanna talk bout the middle Rainbow Room. And its possible connection to MK Ultra.
First. Light is important. Here are two posts about light's and rainbow's involvement in the experiments'.
For context, go to the two @conflictofthemind 's posts.
breathe. sunflower. rainbow. three to the right, four to the left. four-fifty. breathe.
breathe. (He isn't breathing!)
sunflower. (follows the light. Joyce to find Will, El to talk to Terry etc. Will's house being all lit up in the pilot. AND the shed. And the light bulb thing. followed the light? and went back?)
rainbow.
(electromagnetic spectrum gets separated. different wavelengths reflect at a different angle. but in the end it's still just an optical illusion. it doesn't exist in a specific point in the sky.)
Rainbows are actually full circles. The antisolar point is the center of the circle. Viewers in aircraft can sometimes see these circular rainbows. (The horizon obstructs our view. It's as if the second half was under. In the Upside down.)
three to the right, four to the left. 43. 1943?
four-fifty. (Turning up the dial on the machine. 450° degree angle? it loops.
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breathe. it loops.
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Also, the safety vault, the rainbow and the dial is all circle shaped, and it ends on the dial being turned, as if we're actually going round on it's axis. (But in Terry's memories, and Ray's flat, we're only seeing one half of the story. S4? we get too many versions. A half circle, the rainbow going around the room, turning upside down etc.)
In that scene they are in Ray's apartament. (another light reference)
And I have a few theories. This is the writers telling us that
there are multiple versions of the event
these memories from another timeline. which i'll touch upon in a different post, to keep things in order
the event is replicating itself in different manners
Okay, now a rundown of the scene:
-> The Kali Gang bursts in. The RAY-guy begs for his life. Says he's gonna help El find Brenner.
-> Nobody believes the guy, neither the audience nor the characters, but the thing is - he was telling the truth! Now, after s4, after being introduced to yet another, COMPLETELY different rainbow room, we know that.
What also interest me is that Ray said Brenner trusts him - thus he knows Brenner is alive. Was that a secret between the bad men as well? Is Brenner being alive something more than not succumbing to injury circa s1?
The things is!! El and Kali never entered Ray's rainbow room.
And Ray telling us the truth feels like a check mark - this! This is the one!
I think either:
a) there are different versions of the event: Where the girls in the room were not El and Kali, but some other two kids, possibly actual siblings.
a.1) this only happened once - and Jane is not El.
b) The original event that keeps weaving itself into the plot his hasn't happened to Terry specifically.
c) Or there was no ''original'' but it keep's repeating to trigger something, or replicate an effect. Somebody finding two ''kids'' in a rainbow room.
This really feels more like a visual and storytelling metafor.
Same with @erikiara80 post about colour green.
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Especially with what happened st Ray's place.
El and Kali on different sides of conflict, Kali being the more blood-thirsty, revenge seeking one.
-> Kali and El want to kill Ray. But Kali want it to last, to make him suffer. -> For a moment El listens but then Kali-Gang find the girls in the rainbow room -> El notices a photo frame with Ray and his daughters and doesn't kill him in the end. -> This pisses off Kali, she want to kill him, but El stops her. And they evacuate without killing the guy.
vs. El showing 'empathy'.
But we know that NINA's memories are not entirely trust-worthy... (s4 Owens: how much did you skip?)
This might be a nod to the fact that El doesn't actually relate to the strong emotions Kali is feeling about this. (That El is not Jane, Ray didn't torture her mother.)(Or that they originate from different timelines.)
Oh and, let's not forget about the staring point. The Zombie Boy articles. And how Will-Joyce-Hopper are involved in that scene sequence.
Want it or not, in this color grading, this car looks like Joyce's green pinto.
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And this, also, looks like Joyce's green pinto.
Now, why am I suddenly pulling Joyce and Hopper into all of this? Because Hop says a funny line in s2.
"You wanna take him back to Chicago?'' (about Will having episodes. They also mention Boston, where another comic takes place.)
All in all, Hopper discourages Joyce from looking for help anywhere else but HNL.
But take this car parked by Ray's place, take that one line, and take the fact that Ray was not bullshitting El?
And to that let's add that the Zombie Boy event having ''Chief Hopper'' literally written all over the page? Zombie Boy is encircling him for gods sake. (in green) Pointing fingers.
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(Which Chief Hopper tho haha)
oh and
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I really hope this makes sense. Might not. Hopefully it does.
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🌈 Queer Books Coming Out in March 2024 🌈
🌈 Good afternoon, my bookish bats! Struggling to keep up with all the amazing queer books coming out this month? Here are a FEW of the stunning, diverse queer books you can add to your TBR before the year is over. Remember to #readqueerallyear! Happy reading!
[ Release dates may have changed. ]
❤️ Shift: A Memoir of Identity and Other Illusions - Penny Guisinger 🧡 Tempting Olivia - Clare Ashton 💛 Monilinia - Free Mints 💚 Guillaume - Aurora Dimitre 💙 The Marble Queen - Anna Kopp & Gabrielle Kari 💜 The Baker & the Bard - Fern Haught ❤️ Rainbow! - Sunny & Gloom 🧡 The Safe Zone - Amy Marsden 💛 The Weavers of Alamaxa - Hadeer Elsbai 💙 The No-Girlfriend Rule - Christen Randall 💜 A Different Kind of Brave by Lee Wind 🌈 Cirque du Slay - Rob Osler ❤️ Wizard’s Debt - Niranjan 🧡 One Last Breath - Ginny Myers Sain 💛 Nothing Special - Katie Cook 💚 I Feel Awful, Thanks - Lara Pickle 💙 The Tower - Flora Carr 💜 Be the Sea - Clara Ward ❤️ What Grows in the Dark - Jaq Evans 🧡 Heirs of Bone and Sea - Kay Adams 💛 The Haunting of Velkwood - Gwendolyn Kiste 💙 Thunder Song - Sasha taqwšəblu LaPointe 💜 Mona of the Manor - Armistead Maupin 🌈 Like Happiness - Ursula Villarreal-Moura
❤️ Ellipses - Vanessa Lawrence 🧡 Saint, Sorrow, Sinner - Freydís Moon 💛 Blood & Brujas - Mikayla D. Hornedo 💚 Infinity Kings - Adam Silvera 💙 Really Cute People - Markus Harwood-Jones 💜 How You Were Born - Kate Cayley ❤️ These Bodies Between Us - Sarah Van Name 🧡 Icarus - K. Ancrum 💛 The Emperor and the Endless Palace - Justinian Huang 💙 How Not to Date an Angel - Lana Kole 💜 Enemy Colours - R.M. Olson 🌈 Broken Parts Included - Alyson Root
❤️ Who's Afraid of Gender? - Judith Butler 🧡 The Duke’s Cowboy - Andrew Grey 💛 The Secret Something - Emily Wright 💚 Colstead & Andie - Olivia Janae 💙 Play It Again, Ma’am - Sienna Waters 💜 Love Is…? - K.J. Wrights ❤️ Welcome to Forever - Nathan Tavares 🧡 Just Another Epic Love Poem - Parisa Akhbari 💛 The Phoenix Bride - Natasha Siegel 💙 These Letters End in Tears - Musih Tedji Xaviere 💜 Truly Home - J.J. Hale 🌈 Monster Mixer - Robin Jo Margaret
❤️ The House of Hidden Meanings - RuPaul 🧡 Promised to the Queen - Barbara Winkes 💛 A Conclave of Crimson - Nicole Eigener & Beverley Lee 💚 A Hunt of Blood and Iron - Cara Nox 💙 The Fealty of Monsters - Ladz 💜 Ariel Crashes a Train - Olivia A. Cole ❤️ Those Beyond the Wall - Micaiah Johnson 🧡 Dancing Toward Stardust - Julia Underwood 💛 Heir to Dreams & Darkness - Ben Alderson 💙 Comet Cruise - Niska Morrow 💜 Dead Girls Walking - Sami Ellis 🌈 Blackout - Carlos E. Rivera
❤️ Monster Crush - Erin Ellie Franey 🧡 Blessed Water - Margot Douaihy 💛 These Fragile Graces, This Fugitive Heart - Izzy Wasserstein 💚 Kiss of Seduction - Rawnie Sabor 💙 Sunbringer - Hannah Kaner 💜 Evacuation to Love - C.A. Popovich ❤️ Sin - Brooke Matthews 🧡 Falls from Grace - Ruby Landers 💛 Lean in to Love - Catherine Lane 💙 A Small Apocalypse - Laura Chow Reeve 💜 Cascade Failure - L.M. Sagas 🌈 The Mars House - Natasha Pulley
❤️ All This Time - Sage Donnell 🧡 The Romance Lovers Book Club - MA Binfield 💛 View from the Top - Morgan Adams 💚 Number Call - Nagisa Furuya 💙 Crossing Bridges - Chelsey Lynford 💜 The Boyfriend Subscription - Steven Salvatore ❤️ Love the World or Get Killed Trying - Alvina Chamberland 🧡 Synthetic Sea - Franklyn S. Newton 💛 The Prince & His Stolen Groom - J.E. Ridge 💙 Chrysalis and Requiem - Quinton Li 💜 Where Sleeping Girls Lie - Faridah Àbíké-Íyímídé 🌈 A Botanical Daughter - Noah Medlock
❤️ Wednesday Nights - by Donna Jay 🧡 The Woods All Black - Lee Mandelo 💛 Song of the Huntress - Lucy Holland 💚 Rainbow Black - Maggie Thrash 💙 Spirits & Sunflowers - A.D. Armistead & Austin Daniel 💜 Floating Hotel - Grace Curtis ❤️ Far From Camelot - Rylee Hale 🧡 This Way to Change - Jezz Chung 💛 Mexican Bird - Luis Lopez-Maldonado 💙 Android Affection: Unveiling - Beau Van Dalen 💜 Welcome to the Damned - Astraea Long 🌈 She Came for Blood - Darva Green
❤️ Cover Story - Rachel Lacey 🧡 The Poisons We Drink - Bethany Baptiste 💛 The Perfect Guy Doesn't Exist - Sophie Gonzales 💚 In Walked Trouble - Dana Hawkins 💙 Never Leave, Never Lie - Thea Verdone 💜 Guardian: Zhen Hun - Priest ❤️ All the World Beside - Garrard Conley 🧡 Rainbows, Unicorns, and Triangles - Jessica Kingsley Publishers 💛 The Feast Makers - H.A. Clarke 💙 Synthetic Sea - Franklyn S. Newton 💜 All the Painted Stars - Emma Denny 🌈 A Hard Sell - Jennifer Moffatt
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marsmarbles · 8 months
Note
TeeHee have a DamselDuo one shot I wrote. They make me ill. Yay!! (1129 words)
Scott woke up in a cold sweat. His limbs ached, like he had been sleeping there for years instead of just a few minutes. As he surveyed himself for damage, memories came flooding back to him.
Burning hot lava. He had fallen in, been consumed by it while on his nether trip. He can still feel the fire licking his cheeks, encasing his face. Surveying his arms, he could still see burn scars that weren’t going away soon. They would stay to remind him of what he’s done, who he’s just killed.
Who he’s killed. Instead of his arms, his vision focuses on the chains trailing down his left arm. It fazes through the wall, because it’s not actually physical, just an illusion. Scott can see the vague color change from bright green to more of a lime, and he knows what color it will eventually become when it reaches his wrist.
You died. A voice whispers in his ear. Do you know what you did, Star?
“I’m pretty fucking aware, thanks.” He tries not to let the panic seep into his voice, but fails miserably. He can’t deal with the speakers right now, he has to check that he’s ok. Scott jumps out of bed, tripping his way out of the door of his cottage as he runs desperately to follow the chain. It turns from green to lime to a sickly yellow, confirming his worst fears. But really, they were confirmed the second he woke up.
He realizes halfway to his destination that he doesn’t have any of his items. His things were turned to ash in the lava, all of his iron armor and quartz lost to the fire. He ignores this best he can, trying not to think about the hours of work he wouldn’t get back.
Instead he runs faster, his footfalls echoing across the valley. Scott can feel tears prick at the corners of his eyes, whether from the stress or the wind whipping at his eyes, he isn’t sure. The other house comes into view, half built with three walls and several support beams. The chain shrinks as he gets closer, revealing the almost sunflower yellow. 
He rips open the door, looking around the house. Joel is in the middle of the floor, curled up with his head between his knees. “Joel, Joel, I’m so sorry! I-I am so sorry, I didn’t mean to, and-“
“Get out.”
“What?” 
Joel lifted his head from its perch. Scott realized his normally perfect hair was tangled everywhere, the green streak having changed to yellow. His eyes were a similar color, as were the chains around his wrists. He looked horrible, to put it lightly, as it was obvious he had shed at least a few tears. “You promised that you would keep me safe. You lied to me. Get out, Scott, before I go hunt down Pearl.”
“Joel, I-“
“Do you not have fucking ears? I said, ‘get out!’”
Scott flinched away, but refused to leave that easily. When Joel saw his stubborn expression, he just shuffled away and put his head down again. Scott looked around the half finished house, trying to find something, anything, he could use to apologize. He didn’t think he could stand for Joel to be mad at him, not like this.
Scott made his way around the house, doing his best to avoid the sullen figure on the floor. He opened the chests quietly, finding building supplies, stray snacks, and… a hairbrush. He smiled softly and picked it up, heading over to Joel and sitting behind him. 
Scott remembered the first time he had done this. It was their second day in these stupid games. He had discovered that, one, he was chained to Joel (obviously a cruel trick from the Watchers) and two, his hair was very long. Scott had experience with long hair, but Joel didn’t, and it showed. He had laughed and taken one of his ribbons, doing his best to take the leaves and sticks out of his hair before he braided it to match his. That was the first time he had seen Joel genuinely smile at him.
Now he took his hair again in his hands, humming as he brushed it out. Joel let him, keeping his head down. Slowly, he untangled the knots. It was hard work, considering how messy it was, but he finished soon enough. Softly putting the brush down, he split the mass into three strands and started braiding them together. Joel had lifted his head up at that point, not quite a pleased expression on his face, but it was close enough for Scott.
When he had finished, he used a stray ribbon he had (yellow, how ironic) to tie the end so it would stay. Scott silently slid around so he was facing Joel’s face now, and clasped his hands.
“I know there’s no real way I can apologize for what I’ve done, but I truly am sorry. I will do my best to be more careful. I-I woke up, and I was so afraid I had lost you, and-“ He took a shaky breath. “I am so, so sorry. I understand if you can’t forgive me. I’ll leave no-“ Scott stood to walk towards the door, but a hand caught his wrist and pulled him back down.
“I,” Joel took a breath. “I can forgive you. It’s fine, it would happen one day, we knew it was coming.” Joel offered him a toothy grin. “I still hate you though.”
Scott let out a wet laugh. “I love you too, Joel.” He dragged him into a hug, placing his face into his shoulder. “I love you too.”
The repetition meant something, something deeper that neither of them wanted to admit. When Scott pulled away, he offered a smile before he stood. “I’ll go tell Lizzie and Pearl what happened. I’ll be over tonight though.”
When he was less than fifteen feet from the house, an annoying voice spoke in his ear once again. 
Ooohhh, someone has a crush.
“I have standards. I don’t just fall for every guy I meet, you know.”
I don’t know, that seemed to be the case with Jimmy and Martyn and-
“Stop right there! Nope, nope, I will not have the gods metaling in my romantic life. That is something I would like to have control over, thank you very much.”
All in due time, Star.
The Speaker snickered as it flew away. Scott scoffed and kept walking, towards the house that Lizzie and Pearl inhabited. So what if he liked Joel a little more than normal? It wasn’t like anything would happen about it.
Still, as he walked, he couldn’t keep his mind off of how much yellow surprisingly fit Joel.
sorry it’s so long but I love them. Maybe expect more fanfic coming soon of Scar and Sausage???
-🌻
I’m…….im fucking speechless…..THIS IS SO GOOOODDDD RAMXKVKDKCMVMDMCN!!!!! Have you really read through my whole page???? Cuz all of this is too accurate.
Also also also!!!! HOW DID YOU KNOW I WAS GONNA HAVE THE SPEAKERS CALL SCOTT STAR!!!!!???!?!!?!! while I was reading I was “WHOT!!! THEY’RE SPYING ON ME THEY’RE SPYING ON ME!!!
You also captured the Speakers’s personality perfectly!!!
The whole time I was reading I was both smiling uncontrollably and on the verge of tears thank you so much!!! I’m so excited to read more(if you make more that is no pressure)!!!!
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the-mortuary-witch · 3 months
Text
PLANETARY MAGICK
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SUN
Zodiac: Leo
Metal: gold
Day: Sunday
Colours: orange, yellow, and amber
Stones: amber, topaz, ruby, and diamond
Tarot: The Sun 
Herbs: angelica, poppy, sunflower, marigold, hibiscus, and mistletoe
Symbols: lion, hexagram, sparrow hawk, dragon, head, heart, and swan
Influences: renown, potency, fortune, tyranny, pride, ambition, masculinity, arrogance, bigotry, vitality, and health
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MOON
Zodiac: Cancer
Metal: sliver
Day: Monday
Colours: blue and sliver
Stones: moonstone and pearl
Tarot: The High Priestess and The Chariot
Herbs: eucalyptus, coconut, jasmine, lotus, myrrh, and sandalwood
Symbols: bow and arrow, crab, cat, turtle, Sphinx, and owl
Influences: gratitude, friendliness, safe, travel, physical health, wealth, protection for enemies, deception, illusion, women, emotions, healing, and dreams. 
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MERCURY
Zodiacs: Virgo and Gemini
Metal: aluminum and mercury
Day: Wednesday
Colours: violet, grey, purple, indigo, and yellow
Stones: opal and agate
Tarot: The Lovers 
Herbs: hyssop, juniper, betony, carrot, and chickweed
Symbols: wand, octagram, and the mind
Influences: good fortune, gratitude, gain, memory, understanding, divination, dreams, forgetfulness, communication, business, cleverness, creativity, information, intellect, memory, perception, science, wisdom, gambling, writing, root of dishonesty, and deception
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VENUS
Zodiacs: Taurus and Libra
Metal: copper
Day: Friday
Colours: green and pink
Stones: turquoise, emerald, sapphire, and jade
Tarot: The Empress 
Herbs: jimsonweed, violet, rose, alder, apple, angelica, olive, and sesame
Symbols: sparrow, dove, swan, and pentagram
Influences: peace, agreements, cooperation, fertility, joy, love, good fortune, jealousy, strife, and promiscuity
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MARS
Zodiacs: Aries and Scorpio
Metal: iron, red brass, and steel
Day: Tuesday
Colour: red
Stones: ruby, garnet, bloodstone, and diamond
Tarot: The Tower 
Herbs: ginger and mustard
Symbols: sword, pentagram, horse, bear, wolf, and vulture
Influences: war, victory, judgements, submission of enemies, bleeding, stripping one of rank, harness, discord, conflict, aggression, lust, power, courage, goals, protection, motivation, ambition, and strength
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JUPITER
Zodiacs: Pisces and Sagittarius
Metal: tin
Day: Thursday 
Colour: blue
Stone: sapphire
Tarot: The Wheel of Fortune 
Herbs: balm, hyssop, maple leaf and bark, oak, sage, and dandelion root
Symbols: eagle and dolphin
Influences: gains, riches, favour, peace, cooperation, appeasing enemies, and dissolving
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SATURN
Zodiac: Capricorn
Metal: lead
Day: Saturday
Colour: black
Stone: onyx
Tarot: The World
Herbs: alder, apple, ash, asparagus, baneberry, belladonna, distort, hellebore, blackthorn, corm, and cypress
Symbols: cuttlefish and mole
Influences: safety, power, success, positive response to requests, intellect, causes discord, strips honour, and melancholy
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URANUS
Zodiac: Aquarius
Day: Thursday
Colours: blue-green and electric blue
Stones: quartz, labradorite, blue topaz, amber, amethyst, garnet, and diamond
Tarot: The Fool
Herbs: clover, pokeweed, snowdrop, foxglove, love, rosemary, trees of heaven, hellebore, morning glory, sage, wintergreen, orchids, and sweet woodruff
Symbols: dragonfly and butterfly
Influences: breaking connection, sudden and unexpected change, freedom, originality, radical and revolutionary ideas, enlightenment, equality, individuality, rebellion, instability, loneliness, boredom, and mistrust of self
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NEPTUNE
Zodiac: Pisces
Minerals: coral, aquamarine, platinum, and neptunium
Colours: green, blue, and lavender
Tarot: The Hanged Man 
Herbs: morning glory, night-blooming jasmine, pine, and water lily
Symbols: the sea, trident, and the spine
Influences: dissolving boundaries, expanding upon ideas, changing established rules, intuition, idealism, sacrifice, glamour, illusion, evolution, decay, visions, art, healing, inspiration, dreams, creativity, compassion, drifting from reality, carelessness, stubbornness, and absent mind
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PLUTO
Zodiac: Scorpio
Metal: plutonium, tin chrome, and steel
Day: Tuesday
Colours: maroon, dark red, purple, white, and black
Stones: snowflake obsidian and clack tourmaline
Tarot: Judgement
Herbs: pomegranate, rosemary, vanilla, basil, poppies, belladonna, and foxglove
Symbols: phoenix, snake, scorpion, fox, and eagle
Influences: destruction making way for renewal, rebirth, knowledge, spirituality, transformation, destiny, the subconscious, desire, arrogance, death, obsession, and destruction
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thefrogdalorian · 8 months
Text
The Best of Both Worlds - Chapter Seven
Din Djarin x Female Reader Modern!AU
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❁ Series Masterlist ❁ My Masterlist ❁ Read on AO3 ❁
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Word Count:  9456 Rating: General Summary: Despite feeling certain that you'll never see the ridiculously handsome man you gave a tour of the museum to, a special delivery is about to change everything... Content Warnings: Brief description of anxiety, reader feels a bit anxious in a crowded area. Author's Note: Big thanks once again to my amazing beta @suresnips!! I appreciate your feedback so much 💕  The slow burn is certainly slow burning. When I started posting this I was wondering whether I should tag it as slowburn which is ridiculous because 54k words in and they're still like THIS AUGHBSGJD just KISS you idiots! Anyway, really hope you enjoyed this one. I had a blast writing it. This is the last chapter I'd edited while writing, so updates might slow down a bit to once (but hopefully twice) per week now. Thanks for reading, I'd love to know if you're enjoying it so far!!
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6. You're The Sunflower [Reader's POV]
You were under no illusions that the odds of seeing Din again were slim to none, but no matter how hard you tried, you had not been able to stop thinking about him. Ever since you had given him a tour of the museum on Friday night, you had been unable to shake the memory of how incredible you had felt in his presence. Of course, you were instantly attracted to him and felt the spark when the two of you shook hands. Plus, there was that look on his face when he referred to the beauty of the exhibits as he gazed at you. You had been unable to get the way his eyes had softened as he looked at you from your mind, no matter how hard you tried.
Work brought you no relief. Everywhere you went, you were reminded of him. Any time you had to leave your office work behind to face the public, you were barely able to focus on giving the various groups that you had been entrusted with a proper tour. You kept looking out for the patient brown eyes and dark curls that had left an imprint on your mind after such a short amount of time. Several times your heart leapt when you thought you saw a man with just the right physique and height, with similar brown curls. But then his head would turn and your hopes would be dashed. Unfortunately, there were so many visitors to the museum each day that these moments were all too frequent, delivering a crushing blow each time. 
It was ridiculous, pining over Din and looking out for him like this. You were under no illusions to the fact that you would never see him again. The time you had spent together that evening as you gave him a tour of the museum was lovely. In another life, perhaps the two of you would have been able to explore the genuine connection. But in this life: this was it. Your paths were never going to cross again. It was utterly ridiculous to think otherwise, no matter how much you ached to see him again. You just had a little crush on an attractive older guy. You would forget about him before too long.
Fortunately, today you had no tours scheduled. You were tasked with cataloguing some of the museum’s extensive archival collection. Specifically, seventh-century Chinese pottery. Although sometimes you found such work dull, you appreciated that everything had an order to it and a system to be filed under. Once it was completed, it would be incredibly satisfying. So you had thrown yourself into such work, partly borne out of a desire to see it completed but mostly, if you were honest, to distract yourself from the kind brown eyes of a man you would never see again.
The task was going well and you were making storming progress, especially considering that it was only mid-morning. That was until the familiar presence of your manager, Julie, entered the office and disturbed your peace. The sound of a heavy object being placed on the desk with a thud, caused you to look up.
It was perhaps the biggest bunch of flowers you had ever seen, in an ornate vase with stunning patterns running the length of the glass. You could tell, just by looking at it, that it was a luxurious bouquet that had presumably set back whoever bought it several hundred pounds. Your heart skipped a beat. There was no way these could be for you.
When your racing mind finally focused on the flowers, your jaw dropped as you realised exactly what they were. With their tall, green stems and bright yellow petals, they were unmistakably sunflowers. 
As you sat there, aghast at the beautiful bouquet before you, Julie finally offered an explanation: “These came in from a flower shop this morning. The delivery guy said your name. I have no idea who they’re from and trust me, I had quite a battle to get them through security. Luckily a guy called Mo vouched for you. Maybe the card makes sense to you.” Julie said, winking at you as she walked away, leaving you sitting there at your desk, mouth hanging open.
Surely it couldn’t be… from him?
You noticed the little golden card nestled in amongst the sunflowers, with trembling hands you brought it towards your face so that you could see who the flowers were from. On it, the neat black handwriting read:
Let’s show the kid a real rhino. Meet me at the gates of London Zoo.
Saturday, 11:30 am.
– D 
When you saw the single letter at the bottom of the card, you almost fell backwards off your chair onto the hard wooden floor below. It was from him. You felt your skin warming furiously as you read the message. Then, you read it again to make sure that you weren't dreaming. This surely had to be a joke, right?! An elaborate scheme to poke fun at you. 
But that was ridiculous, apart from Ria, who was in a different country, and Mo, who had no idea of your affection for Din, no one had any idea that the two of you had interacted. Plus, given the evident expense of such flowers, it was unlikely someone would squander such an enormous sum on playing a prank. So with all possibilities of a prank ruled out… you finally allowed yourself to believe that this was real. That Din wanted to see you again as much as you wanted to see him. He had felt the spark too and now the two of you would meet again in just a few days. 
You were in complete and utter disbelief that this was real. That there was a possibility that Din felt the same way about you. That, he too, held that same curiosity towards you; that pull that made you want to get to know him better. How, though, could someone like him possibly feel this way about someone like… you?
Julie inched back into the room, clearly having kept her distance from you to allow you to process the flowers and the note. You suddenly panicked and wondered whether she had read the note, and was coming back here to reprimand you for using your job to potentially start a relationship with a visitor. You reasoned that even if she had read the note, Din had left it deliberately vague with just his initial. She would never guess it was the man you had shown around this very museum only a few days previously. 
“I won’t pry,” Julie said with a smile on her face. “But whoever sent those must really care about you.”
You let out a deep sigh of relief. Julie’s demeanour proved that she was anything but mad at you. Fortunately, you and Julie had always gotten along. Unlike some of the other managers at the museum who would have hit the roof if one of their employees had been delivered such a bouquet in the middle of the day, she had been nothing kind to you. She was a couple of decades older than you and she reminded you of a family friend from your childhood. You had leant on her for advice when you had first moved to the big city.
“I think so.” You squeaked, feeling your skin burning up in embarrassment.
“Well, I’m happy for you,” Julie said, placing a comforting hand on your shoulder. “I wish nothing but the best for you. If you want to take your lunch slightly earlier and head off now, you’re welcome to.”
“Thanks, Julie.” You said appreciatively.
Budget cuts and constraints meant that sometimes the museum was understaffed and you were overworked, but Julie was always firm yet fair on the staff. She was great at getting the best out of her employees, she knew who needed to be micromanaged and who could work just as productively while being left to their own devices. You fell firmly in the second category, much preferring to be left to your own thing. And now, Julie could sense that the arrival of a large bouquet and card would send your productivity levels plunging unless you got to take yourself off and have some time to process it.
Your phone was in your hand before you had even left the museum, you were rapidly firing off texts to Ria. It would be early morning for her, but you knew she should be awake for classes and you hoped she was there to help cease the trembling in your body that had overcome you since the arrival of the flowers on your desk.
[ilovemando] 11:37: RIAAAAA!!!!! remember din, the hot guy i showed around the museum with his son?? He fucking sent a bouquet of SUNFLOWERS to my work and said to meet him on saturday at the gates of the zoo i told him about and recommended him to visit with his kid???
[thisistheslay] 11:40: OMG WHAT!?!? FLOWERS TO YOUR DESK!!! THIS SOUNDS LIKE SOMETHING FROM A FANFIC I CAN’T BREATHE????
[ilovemando] 11:42 I KNOW. i was sure it was just my colleague pranking me but no, my manager confirmed it was hand-delivered by a flower shop this morning. and not any flower shop either, this one is like insanely london fancy. i’m just a peasant. i can’t believe this….. this kind of thing doesn’t happen to me!!
[thisistheslay] 11:45: Well, looks like it is happening to you, bestie. I’m so happy for you. What were the flowers like?
[ilovemando] 11:47: he got me sunflowers :’) after i told him van gogh was my favourite painter and i loved that piece. i can’t fucking breathe, honestly. my manager let me get lunch early and i have no idea how i’m going to eat let alone FUNCTION until saturday omg help me
[ilovemando] 11:50: but the thing is idk if it’s a date bc his kid is coming??? ahhhhh i dont wanna assume too much, maybe he just wants to be friends
You placed your phone back in your pocket as you found a place to sit in the park. Since the amount of money you had splurged on Mando merch at ForceCon, you had been forcing yourself to bring packed lunches to work in a bid to save money. It had mostly worked and you found that as the weather was improving, there was no greater delight than sitting outside in the park next to the museum and enjoying your lunch as you watched the world go by.
Once you had found an available bench, conveniently located underneath the tall trees that lined the edge of the park which partially protected you from the sun that was beating down as midday approached, you took your phone out and were relieved to see Ria had immediately texted you back. Your head had been swimming with possibilities over whether Din also viewed this as a date and you were eager to get a rational, outsider’s perspective. 
[thisistheslay] 11:53: I mean, if a guy was sending a fancy bouquet of sunflowers to MY desk, I would absolutely take that romantically. Maybe he just can’t leave his kid with someone and that’s why he’s coming, I wouldn’t take that as a bad thing necessarily.
You read Ria’s message and felt your stomach flutter with butterflies once again as she reminded you of what had just happened. Din had sent you flowers. At your desk. Not just any flowers, either. Flowers that were in a piece of art you adored, that your favourite painter had created. Din had remembered that little detail about you, despite you only mentioning it in passing. 
You shook your head and placed your phone in your pocket. You’d reply to Ria later. For now, you needed to eat your lunch and collect your thoughts so you could regain your composure and make progress on the task that you needed to complete at work that afternoon. 
When you returned to work after your lunch break, however, you found that it was a struggle to focus on carrying out important archival research when an insanely hot older guy that you had an enormous crush on had indicated that he wanted to see you again. Not only did he want to see you again, but he had enlisted a fancy London florist to deliver your favourite flowers, a detail that he had remembered from a brief comment, no less. It was probably the most romantic thing anyone had done for you, which was not exactly difficult. There had been a sad lack of romance in your life over recent years, aside from the Mando fanfics you had consumed each night before bed. Traditional books had fallen somewhat by the wayside when you were at University, but you found that you still had a voracious appetite for reading. Especially when it came to consuming stories where you were the object of Mando’s affections.
Work kept you so busy that you found yourself quite content to be single as it meant that your downtime was yours and yours alone. Plus, adjusting to living in a new city – especially a city as massive as London – had already been difficult enough, without introducing romance into that. Yet it appeared that when you had least been looking for it, a potential love story had fallen right into your lap. It was quite remarkable timing.
Your state of mind did not improve over the next few days. It was a struggle to maintain your composure for the rest of the week and focus on your tasks. Luckily, you had been moved to have a less public-facing role as you stayed behind the scenes in the offices, working on the extensive archives. Luckily, Julie had known exactly how to deal with the situation and had understood, perhaps even before you, that you were in no position to face visitors when your thoughts lay firmly elsewhere. 
Mercifully, with the help of some colleagues and a little bit of overtime, you completed the project on Friday afternoon, as planned. The relief and sense of achievement were immense, it had been no small undertaking to catalogue seventh-century Chinese pottery pretty much all on your own. You practically galloped out of work, excited for the weekend that lay ahead and in particular, to see Din again.
Despite your eagerness to leave work, you still took your time heading home, stopping for noodles at your favourite noodle shop on the way. You timed it just right so that you missed the main rush of commuters who were leaving London to return home and everyone else who was coming into London for a night out. You had had your fun in clubs and bars in the past, but you always felt ancient watching people heading for their nights out in skimpy clothes. There were a few of them, swigging from cans on the platform and laughing and chattering so loudly that you turned your headphones up to their maximum volume.
You did not begrudge them having a good time, but to you, it all just looked so uncomfortable. Rather than wearing uncomfortable clothing and cramming into overpriced bars to listen to awful music, you wanted to go home and sloth out on the couch in front of an episode of Mando. Although you had barely finished your last rewatch, you had just started another one. Despite how occupied your mind had been recently, it felt wrong somehow to not have a Mandalorian rewatch ongoing.
Lounging around on the couch in front of The Mandalorian was precisely how you spent your Friday night. With your comfortable pyjamas and facemask on, you felt somewhat relaxed, despite the churning that would commence in your stomach every time you thought about the prospect of seeing Din again tomorrow.
Although you were excited, you were also incredibly nervous. You wanted to make a good impression and hoped that the chemistry that had been there during the tour carried over to your day out at the zoo. But there were so many things to consider, questions to ask yourself about the whole situation. You found yourself dwelling on whether he viewed this as a date. You knew that you certainly wanted it to be one and sending such an extravagent bouquet probably indicated that there was at least some romantic intention there. But perhaps Din viewed going to the zoo to show Grogu a rhino as a purely platonic outing. You remained unsure of how to take it.
In addition, you were agonising over what to wear. You had triple, no quadruple checked your outfit for the zoo day out with Din. You fretted over how to style your hair, sending several shots to the groupchat to ask for their advice. As much as the groupchat had been helpful, you wished they had been physically present. There was just something about having people close that you couldn’t replicate online. Facetime and voice chats were helpful but you wished you had Ria by your side on the couch, giggling over the stupid goo facemasks you were slapping on your faces as you watched another episode of Mando. But Ria, and the rest of your friends, were thousands of miles away. You were all alone. Well, except for Mando, of course.
After finishing a steaming cup of your favourite herbal tea, you eventually turned in before midnight as you wanted to get up early to give yourself plenty of time. You were probably going to end up being at the zoo ridiculously early, but under no circumstances did you want to leave Din hanging, especially considering that you did not have his number. All you had was a time and a place to be. You were going to be there.
Despite how exhausting your week had been, sleep did not come easily. You tossed and turned, thinking about what tomorrow would bring. It was quite a turnaround of events, to go from believing that you would never see someone again to being only hours from facing them again. Nerves and excitement bubbled away in your stomach as you lay there, picturing the kind brown eyes and that crooked smile that you knew you were only hours away from seeing again…
The familiar tones of The Mandalorian’s theme song roused you from sleep at eight the following morning. You were a bundle of nerves and excitement, feeling as though your skin was tingling all over. As you lay there and slowly blinked your tired eyes open, you found yourself grinning from ear to ear as you remembered that you were awake so early on the weekend because the man whom you were incredibly attracted to wanted to see you again.
You knew there had been an undeniable spark between you and Din that evening at the museum. But you had doubted yourself and eventually convinced yourself that you were being delusional. How could he ever be interested in you? Din was just a polite, kind man, nothing more. How wrong you had been. Now, you were getting yourself ready to see him again.
Well, getting ready was yet to happen. First, you had to watch an episode of Mando as you ate your breakfast. It was a crutch you leaned on during times of great stress. If there was a big life event taking place, chances were that you had watched an episode of The Mandalorian at some point in the build-up to it. People leaned on all kinds of things, it just happened that yours was a sci-fi show that brought you an immense amount of joy. You might have been a little embarrassed about relying on it so heavily but, ultimately, you weren’t hurting anyone else with your hobby. You were proud that Mando had helped you through so much.
With your episode and breakfast finished, it was time to get ready. You had already agonised over the outfit for hours last night. However, in the early morning light, you doubted whether you looked good enough. You wanted to be comfortable considering how much walking you were sure to do, while also making an effort to impress Din. You ended up swapping out the skirt you had planned to wear for a pair of black and white striped cotton pants that were wide-legged enough to be cool in the summer. As you left your flat and headed to the station to make your way into London, you were glad for your last-minute outfit change. The thought of getting onto a busy transport network with all the grime and dirt of fellow passengers while wearing a skirt felt disgusting, somehow.
It was Saturday morning on the tube and mercifully, it wasn’t too busy. You were well accustomed to most routes by now and could use the tube with your eyes closed, if necessary. Today, however, you were so nervous that you felt yourself second-guessing your every move. Doubting whether you were heading in the right direction or on the right line and whether your tube would arrive at the zoo in time.
Fortunately, you remembered to bring your headphones, so you at least had the Mando soundtrack to keep you company. For a few minutes on the tube, you weren’t on an underground system hurtling underneath the streets of London at all. No, you were on a hyperloop pod on Coruscant, zooming along with Mando like you had seen him do several times in the show in pursuit of his most recent bounty. 
As strange as it probably sounded to anyone who did not love the show as much as you did, when you listened to the music you felt as though some of Mando’s certainty in himself and the confident way he carried himself was somehow being transferred to you. You loved Mando for many reasons, but one of them was how much you looked up to him and admired him as a person. He had many characteristics that you only wished you could possess yourself. You truly felt as though he was someone you aspired to be, even if he was fictional. 
You were so caught up in your fantasies, that you almost missed your stop. But fortunately, you realised in time and scrambled for the door. You glanced down at your watch and realised that you were pretty early, it was not even eleven yet. So, you decided to grab a coffee just outside the tube station so you wouldn’t be standing there at the zoo, looking like a little lost puppy. Plus, weren’t you meant to be fashionably late to dates? Or whatever this was? Wasn’t that a thing people did? 
The coffee shop you selected was a bit pretentious and hipster for your taste. You had no desire to order an oat milk two pump caramel chai latte macchiato or whatever it was that people who used a lot of beard cream ordered. So you just settled on a regular cappuccino, which came with a slightly judgmental look from the barista. With your order in hand, you settled down on a comfortable seat by the window in the corner of the shop and took out your phone, firing off a message to Ria.
[ilovemando] 10:49 - ik ur probably asleep now but i’m about to go to the date with din and im so nervous aaah. he’s so hot and i feel like im going to make a massive idiot out of myself. currently drowning myself in coffee. not sure it’ll help my nerves. text me when you wake up!!
Of course, Ria didn’t respond straight away. It was not even six for her and you gathered she was asleep like any normal human would be on a Saturday. With no internet friend to calm your nerves, you instead decided to pass the time by watching the people of London pass by your window. Usually, on a Saturday morning like this, you would be nowhere near the centre of the city, preferring to keep to your quieter neighbourhood. It was a treat to sit and watch people going about their business, young and old, families and alone. You felt as though you were seeing a real slice of life outside that window.
You liked being a wallflower, a quiet observer. You used to spend more time out and about before the pandemic but after everything had locked down you realised you didn’t like people that much, as harsh as that may sound. No, since those times you much preferred to spend your time inside, watching Mando or talking to your friends. So it was strange to be out on a Saturday morning in this part of the city, watching the world go by. The longer you sat there, you found that you didn’t hate it as much as you thought you would. It was a nice change of scenery. 
After a few minutes and drinking half of your cappuccino, you turned your attention inside the coffee shop. You noticed that there were plenty of couples here in this coffee shop, staring at each other affectionately from across the table, their hands clasped around their steaming mugs. It made your heart soar a little in hope, wondering whether those looks and these lazy mornings lay in your future with Din. Maybe you should do this more often. Maybe you and Din could come for a coffee here sometime.
Din, you thought with a start.
Thinking of him made you realise that you had completely lost track of time. It was now twenty past eleven and the Zoo was around a fifteen-minute walk away. You cursed yourself under your breath, you were always prone to daydreaming and could get so easily distracted sometimes, lost inside your own head. You had intended to be on time, maybe even early, to avoid giving any kind of impression that you weren’t eager to see Din again. Yet, now, to ensure that you would have to arrive there a sweaty mess, you would have to speed-walk to the zoo. 
Fortunately, you still had your headphones on and you switched to an upbeat playlist, soon falling into step with the fast guitar and drumbeat as you headed to the zoo. The streets were beginning to get busier now and your earlier musings about enjoying being in the city for a change were long forgotten, replaced by a general disdain for the human race. But then you remembered where you were going and who you were meeting. You couldn't help but feel a smile creep across your face. A smile that only got wider when you approached the zoo gates and you saw a familiar figure standing there, waiting for you.
You felt yourself instantly lighten as you noticed him. A stupid, insecure part of your brain had worried that you had somehow misinterpreted things and he wasn’t going to be there. But sure enough, Din was standing right outside the gates with Grogu nestled in his arms. They were facing away from you but it allowed you to appreciate how broad Din’s shoulders looked from the back as you approached him. You were equally delighted to see the sweet little boy again as you were to see his father. After all, if Grogu had not been so drawn to Dürer’s rhino, perhaps the three of you would not be here together now.
As you approached him, you appraised Din’s outfit. He was dressed in a grey knitted cardigan with a dark turtleneck underneath it and a similar pair of dark brown trousers to those he had worn at the museum. You noticed Din was wearing his trusty brown boots once again. You thought he was a bit overdressed considering it was almost July, but British summer was typically not the warmest, so perhaps he had got it just right. Grogu was wearing a light green, short-sleeved t-shirt and a pair of brown trousers. His curly hair was sticking up at all ends and you thought he looked thoroughly adorable. 
You were only a few feet away from Din now, but he still hadn’t spotted you. You weren’t quite sure how to play it – should you tap him on the shoulder? But you decided against that, you didn’t want to startle him with Grogu in his arms.
“Hi, Din,” you said quietly. Din turned around abruptly to face you as if your presence had startled him.
“You came!” Din said, his face suddenly lighting up, eyes crinkling in joy. The wrinkles beside his eyes were suddenly visible, a visual reminder that he was slightly older than you. But the reminder of his age did not make him look any less attractive. Din looked distinguished and handsome.
“Of course I came! Thank you for the flowers and suggestion to meet here. I loved them, it was very thoughtful of you to remember that I mentioned loving Van Gogh’s sunflowers,” you replied, voice shaking slightly with nerves.
“I’m glad you liked the flowers and didn’t find it, uh, creepy,” Din said nervously, placing his hand on the back of his neck again like he had done the first time you had met him in the museum. It was an adorable, bashful, mannerism that you adored.
“Of course not,” you smiled. “It was incredibly thoughtful of you. I’m so happy that you found a way to stay in touch.”
“Me too,” Din whispered, his eyes shimmering with an emotion that you could not quite place. Then he shook his head slightly and remembered the child that he was holding in his arms. “I hope you don’t mind me bringing Grogu along. But, like I said, wherever I go… he goes. And I believe you originally suggested the zoo because of his love for animals, so it wouldn’t have felt right to come here without him.”
“Of course it’s fine, Din,” You smiled. “Hi Grogu!” You beamed, giving a little wave to the little boy with the big brown eyes.
Grogu returned the smile, you were pleased to see that he seemed a lot calmer than he had at the museum. You saw Din visibly relax as you were fine with his son’s presence.
“It’s so good to see you again,” Din breathed. “I was nervous that you weren’t going to show up,” he admitted shyly.
“How could I refuse an invitation to a Zoo?” You questioned with a smile. 
“Really, you don’t get sick of something like this after working at a museum all week?” Din said, raising one eyebrow at you.
“Absolutely not! Well, a zoo is a bit different to a museum but either way, I always loved them since I was Grogu’s age. I was always the straggler during any school trip to a zoo or museum when I was younger. I could have spent hours there,” You began, but shook your head, realising that you were probably rambling. “But enough about me, why don’t we head inside and find those rhinos that I promised were here and that this little one would love?” You beamed, suddenly self-conscious that you were oversharing again.
Din did not seem to mind though. He seemed to enjoy your tangential little rants. Of course, a few days ago he had been a paying customer for them. Now it was just the two of you, and you were painfully aware that they could be annoying to certain people. Not everyone shared the boundless enthusiasm you held for things that you were passionate about. Not everyone found it sweet and endearing. You had learnt the hard way that people could be profoundly annoyed by your enthusiasm and did not understand that you were not trying to make them feel bad. But those judgmental people were far in the past now. 
It had taken a lot of time and a lot of hurt, but you had learnt the hard way that hiding parts of yourself was incredibly draining and only caused you more heartache and pain in the long term. So, with Din, you determined that things would be different. You were going to be nothing but one hundred per cent honest with him. After all, he wouldn’t have gone to all the trouble of picking out the flowers that you had mentioned just in passing if he didn’t like you on some level. It was time to be yourself and let Din see you for who you truly were.
That time had apparently come sooner than you were anticipating. As you made your way inside the zoo, you were suddenly getting the same vibe you had gotten at ForceCon. Where too many people were crammed into an impossibly small space, making things incredibly crowded. It was slightly panic-inducing, but you resolved to try and remain calm. Unfortunately, you did not have a comforting internet friend and a convenient staircase to hide under. It was far busier than you were anticipating. You usually visited the zoo when you had a half day off or on a Sunday afternoon when it seemed to be quieter. Since the weather had improved and it was a Saturday, though, it should have come as no surprise to see the zoo this busy.
Although you did not have Ria at your side, you were not completely alone. You glanced over at Din and instantly felt a rush of adrenaline course through your body. He looked so handsome, his strong side profile and beautiful nose silhouetted against the crowds of busy people. With his broad shoulders and looming presence, a feeling of calmness and security washed over you. Maybe if you had had him to ogle when you had been making your way through the crowds at ForceCon, you would have handled it better, you thought with a smirk.
That momentary relief was fleeting, though. The crowds did not cease, you found that same sensation of being swept away gnawing away in your gut that you had at the convention. But, you reasoned, you had handled that then, just like you would handle this now.
“Are you alright?” Din said, suddenly noticing that you looked slightly uncomfortable. You momentarily cringed, feeling self-conscious that he had noticed how much you were struggling. 
“I’m fine, just not a huge fan of crowds,” you admitted with a slight grimace. “It’ll be fine once we clear out of the entrance though and get on the paths to one of the enclosures. Actually, I think the rhinos are right at the back where hopefully not many people will head straight away. Maybe we could go there first, work against the crowds?”
Din agreed with your suggestion and was content to let you lead the way. The three of you headed down a path that seemed to be in the correct direction of where the rhinos were. It seemed like you were walking the same way as the crowds for a little while. You feared for a second that perhaps, everyone had the same idea as you to head to the back of the zoo first.
Eventually, the tide seemed to turn and more people began heading down the narrow path towards you. You had to squeeze in and get close to Din. You inhaled sharply at the way your skin tingled as you brushed shoulders with him. It was ridiculous that such a light touch, through a shirt, could set your entire body on fire like that. 
Then something bizarre happened. As you moved in to let the latest family pass, you noticed that Grogu was pointing at a young boy. You wondered for a second if they were perhaps friends, but when you looked a little closer you noticed the boy was wearing a shirt with Mando’s helmet on it. What a coincidence! You wondered if perhaps Grogu was a fan of the show. After all, despite its violent elements, it was surprisingly popular with kids. The comment Din had made in the museum about Grogu liking armour came to mind, too. 
You were about to ask Din whether he and Grogu had watched The Mandalorian, but you noticed a strange look suddenly sweep across his features. It seemed to you as if he wanted this family to move past you as quickly as possible. Din sped up and hurriedly walked a few paces ahead of you further up the path, clearly eager to get away from the child as quickly as possible. You frowned slightly and followed him, wondering what precisely it was about the tiny interaction that had spooked him so much. You didn’t question Din on his actions or push for answers. You guessed that he was just a little nervous with Grogu in the crowd. After all, the kid had a habit of running off which you were all too familiar with following his antics in the museum the previous week.
Fortunately, you did not have too long to dwell on the interaction as the path came to an end and you soon found yourselves at the edge of the rhino enclosure. Din picked Grogu up, lifting the little boy so he could take in the sights of the animals over the wire fences that bordered the enclosure.
“See, Grogu?” Din said, pointing in the direction of the beasts. “It’s the same animal we saw in that artwork the other day at the museum, a rhinoceros!”
Grogu chirped in delight, bringing his hands together in glee. The child seemed happy to be here, to be spending time with both of you. He was delighted, as he took in the fact that the same animal that he had seen in picture form a few days ago, was now here before him. Grogu could not convey it in words, but you were sure that he was delighted that you and Din had gone to the trouble of bringing him here.
You looked over at Din too, finding that he was equally enthralled by the rhinos, his brown eyes wide in awe as he watched them pace throughout the enclosure. It was sweet to see whatever stress that Din had endured after Grogu had been so drawn towards that Mando shirt, slowly releasing as he gazed at the magnificent, otherworldly beasts. 
You were still curious about Din’s adverse reaction to a seemingly innocent t-shirt. Perhaps Din just really hated that show, you reasoned. Pop culture was a topic that you had not really broached with Din thus far. You were a little afraid that your references might draw blanks from him given your slight age gap. Din being slightly older than you didn’t bother you and you felt as though there was no real power imbalance between the two of you. Plus, you loved how respectful and caring he was, in a way that guys your age were not.
As you and Din stood there admiring the rhinos, you found yourself mesmerised by the power of the beasts; the way their firm, coarse skin rippled as they took steps through the mud. It broke your heart to think that these creatures were poached for their horns and that some species were now critically endangered. Seeing them before you, they did not look real somehow. It was as though they were not from this universe and had fallen to Earth by mistake, one day. The rhinos looked like they did not belong here. In a way, you sympathised with them. 
Despite the fact you were here with Din, you found that your mind inevitably drifted back to Mando. You thought it was amusing in a way that Grogu had been so drawn towards rhinoceroses. They reminded you of the fictional creature in Star Wars, the mudhorn, that Mando wore on his pauldron. He had managed to slay one against all odds to get its egg and keep a group of unruly Jawas at bay. You remembered watching in awe as Mando used his cunning and strength to outwit the helpless creature. The rhinoceros was probably the closest thing to a mudhorn on this earth. It was an amusing coincidence, especially with Grogu’s attraction to the Mando shirt. 
After a few more minutes of gazing upon these magnificent creatures, you decided to leave the rhinos behind and head elsewhere in the zoo. Din had told you that in addition to rhinos, Grogu also liked frogs, so you headed towards the building that housed them. It was a magnificent brick building, with an ornate arch over the doorway. There were also plenty of windows to ensure that the reptiles inside were bathed in natural light. Unfortunately, it was also incredibly hot and humid inside, another measure necessary to keep the little creatures safe. You felt yourself beginning to clam up, both at the temperature change and the number of people crammed into this building. But then you looked at Grogu, his little face full of wonder as the three of you came to a halt in front of a large tank containing frogs, and your heart soared at the sight of him so excited. 
You moved to continue walking further around the Reptile House, but the sound of Din calling your name stopped you in your tracks. Grogu had forced his father to stop in front of one of the tanks and was practically squirming out of Din’s arms. The mischievous little boy tapped his small chubby hands onto the glass insistently, looking at the frogs almost as though he wanted to eat them. The kid loved frogs just as much as he loved the carving of the rhino, it seemed. You watched them with a smirk on your face, admiring the sweet scene before you. Well, it was mostly sweet, Grogu was undeniably being a bit of a menace. No matter how much Din tried to tell him that he wasn’t going to be able to touch the frogs, it seemed that the little boy could not handle that fact. He was devastated by the reality that the frogs were going to remain on the other side of the glass, out of his hands. 
You usually disliked small children, their wailing and constant need for attention irked you. Despite your usual disdain for children, you found it was impossible not to like Grogu. He was a cute kid, a complete charmer and, for the most part, very well-behaved. He had listened patiently to you at the museum the other day and had been exceedingly well-behaved on this trip to the zoo thus far. But it seemed that the frogs had pushed him over the edge. His bottom lip jutted out, beginning to pout. And then the wailing began. It was a terrible sound, one that was almost painful to your ears. You looked over to Din in panic, he had already gathered his son up in his arms and was pressing him against his shoulder in an attempt to console him. But nothing was working; the kid would not stop crying. 
“Shhhh, Grogu, shhhhh,” Din said, pleading as the toddler’s temper tantrum began to turn more than a few heads. “Sorry about this… I think it might be best if we head outside.”
“It’s fine Din.” You nodded and let him lead the way. 
Despite how busy the exhibit was, when a person had a wailing toddler in their arms, the crowds just parted instantly, without question or hesitation. You smirked as Din made his way through the crowd, mumbling ‘sorry’ and ‘excuse me’ with a frequency that any Brit would be proud of. You finally made it outside, blinking in the light. Din swung Grogu off his shoulder and looked at his son, caressing his cheek with his thumb, wiping the tears that were staining his chubby cheeks. You were in awe at the calmness and speed with which Din had approached the situation, undaunted by a wailing toddler which was, to you, a terrifying prospect. He was a natural at fatherhood, that much was obvious. 
“Alright, pal. We’re out of there now. Please calm down, Grogu,” Din pleaded, looking nervously around at the nosy onlookers.
You could tell that he was embarrassed and you felt incredibly sorry for him. After all, there was nothing to be ashamed about. Grogu was just a little boy, he didn’t understand that he couldn’t hold the frogs. You decided to step towards them and hopefully offer some words of comfort.
“Hey little guy, what’s the matter?” you asked, concernedly. “I know you love frogs, I really do… but you can’t touch them, Grogu. They have to stay in their tanks so they’re nice and warm. It keeps them safe and protects them. Just like you feel protected when you’re in your dad’s arms,” you smiled, hoping that your words were cutting through to the tearful little boy. Grogu stopped wailing and titled his head to the side, as though he was trying to process the new information you had given him and make his mind up whether it was agreeable. 
“That’s right, we wouldn’t want anything to happen to the frogs, would we?” Din joined in, nodding at you appreciatively for your intervention.
Grogu was still for a few moments but then began furiously shaking his head. It seemed that yours and Din’s kind words had finally gotten through to him. 
“Good boy! That’s it, Grogu, well done for understanding why you can’t touch them,” Din said proudly. 
“Well, you can’t touch those frogs, Grogu. But perhaps we can head to the gift shop on the way out and there might be a frog toy there for you?” You offered with a smile, hoping that Din was okay with such an offer.
Din nodded, seemingly approving of your suggestion and you felt relieved that you had not overstepped your boundaries. Thanks to yours and Din’s soothing words, Grogu soon calmed down. Now that you did not have a crying toddler to contend with, you turned around and noticed that you were standing by a play area that was currently deserted of any children. You laid eyes upon the swingset that was currently empty, a mischievous idea forming in your head.
“Shall we go on the swings?” You questioned playfully.
“It would be rude not to,” Din said with a smirk.
You made your way over to the swings, taking a seat as Din sat at the one next to you, Grogu sitting in his lap. Din told him to hold on but you had already begun moving yourself in earnest, kicking your legs out, determined to swing higher and higher. Din looked at you, a wide smile on his face as Grogu giggled. It wasn’t long before you and Din were both laughing hysterically.
Only moments before, Grogu had been violently wailing, but that terrible scene was now a distant memory as the three of you swung on the swing set. You knew that you would feel self-conscious about unleashing your inner childish side like this with most people. But with Din, you truly felt as though you could be yourself. You felt too, that the more he saw you interact with Grogu, the more he was also beginning to lower some kind of guard that he had encircled himself in. You continued happily swinging on the playground for a few more minutes until two small boys ran up to it, their faces dropping when they saw it was occupied. You felt as though you couldn’t stay there any longer with them watching you like that, so you looked at Din and the three of you climbed off and allowed the kids to play.
After leaving the swings behind, the two of you headed to the penguin enclosure, keen to see the magnificent black and white birds swimming around with your own eyes. As you and Din leant on the railings, Grogu between you, mesmerised by the creatures, the conversation shifted towards your romantic lives.
“So… uh, I was thinking perhaps we could go for some lunch at the cafe over there. Is that alright? I mean, there’s no one waiting for you back at home?” Din asked, his deep voice trembling as his brown eyes remained firmly fixed on the penguins.
“No, Din,” you breathed. “There’s no one waiting for me at home.”
“Wizard!” Din exclaimed. “Oh uh… I mean good, I wanted to spend the entire day with you.”
“Me too, Din,” you smiled. “I take it from your reaction that there is no one waiting for you, either.”
“No, it’s uh… it’s just me and Grogu. Always has been since I found him,” Din divulged and you thought you saw him grimace slightly as he admitted that. “I adopted him, you know. Don’t know much about his early life, but I’m all he has, now.”
“I gathered you had adopted him, but blood doesn’t always matter. I think you’re an amazing father,” you smiled at Din encouragingly.
“Thank you,” Din whispered, his voice cracking and eyes shimmering at your compliment.
At that moment, the little boy you had just been discussing so fondly decided to hold out his arms to Din, an indication that he wanted to be picked up. Din leaned down to scoop him up and the moment passed, but the implications of the conversation you had just shared were clear. You were both single. There were no barriers to you exploring something together. Grogu then began rubbing his stomach, an indication that he was hungry and the three of you headed towards the cafe that Din had earlier spotted.
After a delicious lunch, the rest of the afternoon passed without incident. Mercifully, Grogu did not encounter anything else that upset him as much as the Reptile House had. You and Din strolled around the remainder of the zoo at a leisurely pace, chatting to each other a little bit about your pasts as you went along. There was nothing in particular that either of you wanted to see, happy to let the mood dictate your pace. There was no pressure, nowhere for either of you to be. You gathered from comments that he had made about how busy he had been at work that week, that this was a rare, calm moment in Din’s schedule, as it was yours. He seemed to be relishing it as much as you did.
You were enjoying every moment in his presence, relieved that the spark you had first felt at the museum had carried over to your day out today. However, it was difficult to have a real conversation with him over the constant noise and toddler that you were accompanied by. Much as you had enjoyed your day out, you longed to see Din again in a quieter environment, perhaps just the two of you. But you would not make any demands or push him. Although he had been deliberately vague about what exactly it was that he did for a job, it sounded hectic and stressful. You completely understood if he wanted to spend his downtime with Grogu. You would put no pressure on him, expecting nothing even though you were extremely keen to see him again.
Eventually, you realised that it was almost closing time for the zoo. It was time to make your way to the exits and leave the animals and lush scenery behind. Though not before your promised visit to the Gift Shop, of course. You had promised Grogu a frog, after all. Fortunately, Grogu laid eyes upon the perfect toy to offset the disappointment that he had earlier felt at not being able to touch any of the amphibians. It was a bright green frog plush that he had toddled over to as soon as he laid eyes upon, pointing to it with a chubby hand, his brown eyes looking up at you expectantly.
Despite Din’s protestations that he would pay for it, you insisted. You wanted to treat the precious little boy and reward him for how well-behaved he had been throughout the day, despite his momentary lapse. Plus, Din had bought your tickets and the lunch you had enjoyed by the penguin enclosure. You felt it was the least you could do. The child was overjoyed, hugging his new frog friend tightly in one hand as he toddled alongside the pair of you out of the shop, Din clasping his other hand. 
As you made your way out of the zoo, there was an ice cream van by the entrance, clearly aimed at the crowd exiting the zoo, complete with persuasive children in tow. Grogu had locked eyes on the van that was selling the sweet, sugary treats and of course, there was only going to be one outcome, his big brown eyes were too much for Din to resist. So the three of you ordered a British summertime staple: a classic 99 Flake. It was soft-serve ice cream on a cone with a crumbly, flakey chocolate bar stuck in the ice cream.
After walking away from the van, the three of you found an empty bench to sit on, to watch the world go by and enjoy your treat. Grogu was perched contentedly on Din’s lap, and you noticed, heart skipping a beat, how close you and Din had naturally found yourselves sitting on the bench. Your shoulders and arms resting against each other, your thighs touching too. It felt surprisingly comfortable and affectionate considering how little time you had spent together. But you were certain of one thing: it felt so, so right. Of course, there were probably limits to what public displays of affection Din felt comfortable with in front of Grogu. You felt certain that this was a sign of his intentions, one that set your pulse racing.
After you had all finished your ice creams –  Grogu had ended up wearing more of his ice cream, the sweet treat smeared all around his lips, on his cheeks and nose – the three of you sat there in companionable silence. You watched as the dregs of the crowd filtered through the ornate gates where you had started your day hours before. The silence was pleasant, you were enjoying the sensation of being close to Din, his warm strong body resting against yours. You wondered if he had enjoyed the day as much as you had, hoped he had, at least. You wondered whether Din would like to see you again or if that was it. As if he could read your racing thoughts, Din broke the silence that had settled between the pair of you.
“So, uh. I was thinking… I would love to see you again, perhaps sometime in the week, after you finish work?” Din offered. “I can leave Grogu with a friend and meet you at the museum. Just be the two of us.”
“That sounds wonderful, Din,” You breathed, a shy smile crossing your lips as you looked into his soulful brown eyes. “I would love to.”
“Great!” Din said, smiling widely, clearly relieved that you were both on the same page about wanting to see each other again. “Let me give you my number, I’ll be in touch.”
You took your phone out of your pocket and held it towards your chest, unlocking it with slightly shaky fingers, overcome with excitement and tremendous relief that he had enjoyed your company. You were careful to hold your phone close to your body as you unlocked it so that Din could not see the picture that was your lockscreen. You weren’t sure how to explain the photo of you standing next to the incredible Mandalorian cosplayer that you had taken a picture with at ForceCon to someone like Din. Especially considering the way he had earlier responded to the Mando helmet t-shirt. You weren’t ready to show Din what level of nerd you were just yet. Surprisingly, you hadn’t brought Mando up to him yet. It was partly due to his reaction but also because you knew by your nature, how hard it would be to hide your true enthusiasm for it and just act like a casual fan. It was best left until you had gotten to know Din a bit better.
The unfamiliarity and uncertainty that lingered, despite how sure you were that you wanted to see Din again, was a reminder that this was only the second time you had spent time together. It was hard to believe that you had just met, because when you spent time with Din, you felt, somehow, that you knew him already. You had felt instantly comfortable in his presence, as though you had known him for many years.
And in a way, you had. You just didn’t know it.
Next Chapter
Taglist: @toxic-seduction @survivingandenduring @readingiskeepingmegoing
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manytoonepoet13 · 4 months
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Fragaria Memories - Your Melody Song Analysis Essay.
"It is at his most vulnerable, where the knight shall be at his strongest."
Collab with @chamalam0726
Read for more insights: Fragaria Memories - Ever Red Visual Analysis Essay. Poem inspired by this analysis: Your Melody – "Tell Me, My Dearest."
(Duration of analysis: February 2024 to May 2024.)
1.) Visuals. a.) Cover - album.
Hallritt - Notice how he has his hand curled up in a fist. Usually, this means that he's tense, having to use his strength to clench his fist. He's tense from all the harsh memories, from the harsh truth, it made him hard, cold, concealed, in comparison to the usual Hallritt. He's serious, not as bright and fun fun like usual - now have lost the purity he once possessed.
Merold - Notice the ribbon in between his middle and index, it's as if he's mimicking a pair of scissors, releasing himself from the bondage of fragmented memories and the vague, incomplete truth. And with that, he, too, has released Hallritt, now having someone to share this with, someone who will stand by his side. Like I said, releasing themselves from the bondage of the past and acknowledging their scars to acknowledge the truth and what's righteous.
"Hallritt's bouquet is the only bouquet that does not contain a ribbon. This could signify that the flowers in the bouquet are memories and that the ribbons represent what's restraining the characters from remembering the memories. Knowing Hallritt is the only one that remembers, it makes sense for his bouquet to not have a ribbon." - @ c h a m a l a m.
"So you see how Merold is holding the ribbon with his hands shaped like scissors and remembers how you told me that Merold was the first person Hallritt told him. To me, it seems as if he's now cutting the ties of what's restraining him from remembering - or the ribbons." - @ c h a m a l a m.
Rimicha - Notice how his hand is slightly hidden under the flower's petals, yet still open, holding the bouquet so delicately, as if relishing in the joy (what sunflowers usually mean) in being blind and innocent as a child. I believe that with this song, it made him more open to the truth, more willing to let go of the momentarily happiness for the sake of a much greater, ever lasting one. One that'll save the entire fragaria world. It may seem like a small sacrifice, but for Rimicha? I believe it meant everything to him, not because it's his duty as a knight, or because it's for his friends, but because it's something so personal to him. Rimicha is all for fun, for joy, and to have that taken away from him... must be hard, yet he knows it's for the best.
b.) Music Video's key elements.
Based on the video's visuals, I can create a hypothesis where this song talks about Merold casually enjoying this "peaceful" life he currently has in this timeline and based on the flowers I can identify; Sunflowers and roses means happiness, loyalty, adoration and love, royalty, beauty. sensuality, mysticism and secrecy. What is interesting about the last two: Mysticism and secrecy is that I can infer that he (Merold) feels like this "peaceful life" is an illusion, this is why I believe the corners were blurred in some scenes, and why they're situated in this luxurious mansion, He, or even majority of the knights, are fixated on this illusion.
But then again, Merold feels like something is missing, like a broken mirror showing every part of you but one specific and most important part: His memories. I feel like this song is about him talking and relearning about these "missing parts" of him that he can no longer remember, and how it affects him and how he views happiness, love, and passion he had for the world and for his friends.
There might even be purity mixed in with the love and passion Hallritt has for the world and his friends relating to the reoccurring line "The knights ask for nothing in return for their love.", Hallritt's purity and innocence mixed in with the love and passion he's feeling has caused this predicament they were once and currently in. Losing their precious memories of each other and the most important part of one's self because of him.
I believe this is Merold's awakening moment, where he'll finally remember everything that has happened in the past and would like to reconcile (-with Hallritt).
This relates to my and my best friend's reconciliation theory.
"Take it this way, we got into a big fight, I got amnesia, I no longer remember you and bestfriend J, but as I got reintroduced to more memories (Hallritt telling Merold), I start to remember more. And because I remember more, it makes me cherish the memories we once had, so it pushes me to want to reconcile. Simply because I want to experience more of those memories." - @ c h a m a l a m.
"Your Melody" or "Hallritt's Melody" rather, is what made Merold open his eyes to the truth, and how the truth feels like a paradox to him. How it'll be bad if he doesn't know the truth, but then again, there's nothing wrong with knowing it, maybe it's even for the better.
And now he's just listening to Hallritt's Melody as he takes this next step with him.
2.) Soundtrack. a. Instrumentals.
One thing I would really like to point out is the clock ticking sound at the beginning and end of the song which will most probably relate to my time loop theory. Though, I'll assume that because of the seed's corruption, not only did it erase everyone's memories, but it also disrupted time itself, therefore creating this time loop only Hallritt can know and understand.
3.) Lyrics.
"If you even brush against me, I'll melt into a slumber."
Complacency - Them falling and fixating on this illusion of a life that they have, being caught up in this bliss that they feel peaceful and comfortable enough to fall into this slumber.
"The fairytale of that day you told me about... The pleasantly soft and and sweet whispers, Just listen to them carefully, don't get flustered now."
Hallritt telling Merold about that day, when everything went wrong, what happened in the past. Allowing Merold to recall those memories.
"It's ok to deceive with an outright lie... because within it lingers a quiet love."
Talking about this seemingly peaceful and perfect life and how it is probably better to stay within this illusion, for the sake of everyone's safety.
"That MELODY of a season that has passed is our promise, so don't cry. The ending to that story was that I truly was happy being YOUR MELODY. The MELODY of a voice that you approached me with. If I were to ever stain your smile, then I would do away with this heart of mine.
This is where Merold is starting to remember more, wanting to reconcile because he wants to maintain this friendship he once cherish and will cherish and create more memories with him.
He doesn't want to hurt Hallritt's feelings even more, so, he does away from his past actions, and ultimately chose to reconcile with Hallritt.
"The signals from our talks that made my heart flutter... are now sinking down my ordinary wish to the bottom."
That "ordinary wish" being the want to continue this "peaceful life" that he has, but the more he and Hallritt are talking, he realizes just how this can be incredibly crucial to their story.
"As if two hearts laid atop each other's... may we be connected by their singular rhythm."
This gives me the impression that since the both of them now knows that there is more to this than this illusion of a life, they are now connected by their "singular rhythm", this newfound goal of theirs.
"Let me fill your gaze with bouquets of flowers blanketing the horizon. All those fragmented things are intensifying our MELODY. Come, let's turn the timidity into joy and dance to your MELODY in the scores. The MELODY of your voice that I want to remain beside, what if... If you want to cloud over the future, if it is sadness that you want to echo... then please let me play it from here."
"Song wise, the last words have a build up (Let me fill your gaze...). Since we correlated the memories as the flowers, "Let me fill your gaze with bouquets of flowers blanketing the horizon." to me is how the truth/memories are all coming clear now. Because there's a buildup in the notes, it makes me think that this is where things start to happen.
"Let me fill your gaze" suggests that the memories shouldn't be hindered from anyone as those memories rightfully belong to them. I think this also correlates with reconciliation being truthful is also considered as a form of that." - @ c h a m a l a m.
(Eyes has been used as a metaphor more often than not in Fragaria.)
I feel like there is some sort of limitation within that line, solely focusing on the "your" person (Hallritt) they're talking to.
So it's like "I did this to you, so whatever I will do, is for your eyes and your eyes only because this is between us two."
"Even with this fragile heart, above all else, you are my dearest. (Tell me, tell me why.) These overflowing feelings are a MELODY for you. (Tell me, tell me why.)"
For so long, he has uphold this strong knightly image, probably in an attempt to hide this fragile heart of his as well as to protect all of those who are dear to him, because despite how these feelings overflow, it is still for them, for you.
4.) Symbolisms.
(Just to elaborate certain visual elements.)
1.) Mirrors with flowers - Along with the clock ticking sound, there are also these flowers that came along each beat. Since we made a connection between the flowers and memories, I would also like to point out how these flowers may also symbolize their emotions that are being held back, inside the mirror.
2.) Merold in the broken mirror - Relating to what I noted prior, this also applies to this scene but with Merold instead of flowers. I would also like to note how Merold had his eyes closed when he was both in the meadow and in the broken mirror but then opened his eyes afterwards with a smile.
That's because he was truly happy now that the truth is out.
He is finally free.
3.) Feathers - "Across time and cultures, feathers have symbolized ascension, enlightenment, and spiritual evolution." charlesmcquillen.com.
I love how this choice of transition happened after they have the truth, therefore being enlightened and set free from this illusion, that's why it finished off with the three of them being in a meadow rather than being in that luxurious mansion they were in.
Now, they are reunited with their truest of emotions and memories, as they stand happily in the flower field.
Free.
4.) "Movie" Frame - My other best friend (bestfriend J) pointed out that the frames throughout the entire mv is reminiscent of those vintage movies, which was further proven by the grainy texture and vintage feel of the final scene.
This may relate to what I have pointed out in my Ever Red Analysis Essay as well, where it talks about how the mv is reminiscent of a videotape and that Hallritt was holding the camera (more on that in the Ever Red post).
These kinds of things stretch out even towards Blue Bouquet.
This relates to the reoccurring line in Ever Red "Live in Memories", because they are quite literally living in memories.
It is with these little recorded fragments of their memories can they actually learn their and live as their true selves if they want to save this world (and escape this time loop).
But until then, when the clock strikes, may it strike thrice.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"The knights ask for nothing in return for their love."
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psst, do you got any ford centric fic recommendations?
if so would you be so kind as to share them?
I HAVE. SO MANY
alas they would not all fit here so here are just a few
A Steady (Heart) Beat Goes 1, 2, 3, 4 and Seizing Up and Head Above Water by jackyrubou, all hurt/comfort fics set after weirdmaggedon when the stan twins are actually communicating with each other. the first two fics center around physical pain, heart conditions and tonic-clonic seizures respectively, while the third one focuses on emotional pain, specifically depression and suicidal ideation from ford
Drastic Measures by embulalia, a two-chapter fic focused on ford's experiences with the oracle, specifically stated to be through a platonic lens. i'm trying so hard to be unbiased. i'm trying so hard to be unbiased. i'm trying so hard to be unbiased. i'm trying so hard to be
Wherever We Go... by IncomingAlbatross, a hurt/comfort sea grunks fic that explores the idea of ford being afraid of being abandoned
Being There by redwoodroots, another hurt/comfort sea grunks fic, but this time about ford's ptsd
This Was Probably a Bad Idea, But Who Cares? You're A Vampire. by VenomQuill, a fic that claims to not be fiddauthor but. you'll see what i mean. still, it has bloodthirsty vampire ford in it, so i don't mind rereading it too much. features mystery trio
Filial Piety and Mind your Mind both by Chigrima. the first is about ford in the fearamid with a more...creative method of torture from bill, the second is about ford having the metal plate put in (without the oracle). both involve a lot of blood, violence, and graphic descriptions of injuries
April Fool's by ChromaticDreams, a sea grunks fic that does start from stan's perspective, but is entirely about ford and does feature his perspective for the end half
Jump In Front of Trains All Day and Stay Alive and Illusions of Safety (Delusions of Danger) both by Voidfish. both fics are about ford struggling after weirdmaggedon, and are based more around emotional pain than physical pain (though the first one is kickstarted by a physical reaction to the torture he went through)
hide and seek by parsnipit, a multi-chapter fic hurt/comfort sea grunks that's mostly from stan's perspective, but entirely about the idea of feral ford
and, finally SUNFLOWER, BABY by yearningsofthewind. what's this one about? i don't remember. but i know it's about portal ford and i also know it's the immediate first thing that pops into my head when i think about fanfiction, so it's gotta be pretty damn good right? sticks in my grey matter like glass between teeth
anyway, thank you for the ask, and i hope you enjoy reading some new fics!
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The First Time, Every Time: Eve
Rated X / 2567 words / Posted on AO3 / Tagging @today-in-fic
She feels like a world class idiot, partly due to being manipulated by a pair of homicidal eight year olds. But they managed to pull one over on everyone—including their own parents—so she can’t hold herself too much at fault there. What’s really bothering her is that she knew, or at least had her suspicions, that something was off with the girls, and she let her guard down anyway. She ignored her instincts, and it nearly got both her and Mulder killed. 
She sinks down onto the bed in her motel room and rubs her hands roughly over her face, cringing at the memory of how stupid she was. How naive. How uncharacteristically girlish. Allowing herself the tiny thrill of playing house with Mulder while the Eves were under their watch backfired gloriously, and as intelligent as the children are she has to imagine that was their intent. They capitalized on the vulnerability they saw in their adult escorts, stopping just short of directly calling them Mom and Dad, and it had worked so well it almost landed her in the autopsy bay. If a couple of prepubescent psychopaths can see it, it must be fairly obvious that she has a teensy little crush on Mulder. Hell, he’s a behavioral profiler, so it must be obvious to him, too. 
It’s not that she has any illusions that something might happen between them, and she honestly wouldn’t even want it to. They’re completely incompatible, and that’s to say nothing for the potential impact to her career were she to act on her urges. But he’s cute, and he only got cuter when he was playing the role of doting father, ushering his gaggle of girls into the truck stop for a bathroom break and a soda. Maybe she flirted a little, and maybe he flirted back, and those damn Eves saw right through them. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. 
She knows that it’s Mulder knocking on her door, and she briefly considers pretending that she’s not in. But it’s late—or early, depending how you look at it—and he has the keys to the rental, so where else would she be? She hauls herself up off the bed and reluctantly opens the door just wide enough for him to see her face. 
“Soda?” he asks, holding up a can of Diet Rite from the vending machine. “Factory sealed for your safety,” he adds, wiggling the can temptingly. 
She smirks, despite her best attempts to suppress it, and opens the door the rest of the way. Mulder walks in and sets the soda down in front of the TV, along with a second that he fishes out of the pocket of his suit jacket, and gives her an appraising look. 
“Wild night, huh?” he says, popping the tab on one of the cans.
An hour ago she was sure she’d never drink soda again, but the crack and hiss of the can opening sets off a Pavlovian response, making her mouth water. Mulder hands it to her and she takes an experimental sip. Not too sweet. 
“That’s one way of putting it,” she says. 
She sits on the end of the bed and he plops down beside her, close enough that his thigh brushes up against hers before he scoots millimeters away. He has a particular end-of-day smell that’s becoming familiar to her: remnants of cologne and deodorant, and the damp salted musk of sunflower seed hulls that line the bottom of his jacket pocket. She has an overwhelming urge to lean into him, but she doesn’t. 
“You okay?” he asks, and she looks up at him sharply, wondering what he sees that she hadn’t meant to show him.
“Yes,” she says, perhaps a little too emphatically. “I was just thinking about Cindy Reardon’s mother. I have no idea how we’re going to explain this to her.”
“You don’t think she knew?” he wonders aloud. “Maybe on some subconscious level?”
Scully shrugs and looks at the floor. 
“That little girl was the embodiment of all her hopes and dreams,” she says sadly. “Even if she knew something was off, she probably explained it away. I know I did.”
She feels him looking at her, but she keeps her eyes on the faded paisley carpet under her feet. 
“What do you mean?”
“I mean,” she says, pulling in a deep breath, “that I knew something was off about the girls, but I attributed it to the recent trauma they’d been through. I allowed my preconceptions about what innocent-looking eight year old girls are capable of to override my instincts, with nearly disastrous results.”
He bumps his shoulder against hers and she looks up at him to find a deliciously boyish smile on his face. 
“Don’t go stealing all the credit, Scully,” he says, leaning in. “I demand that my contributions to the truck stop disaster be accounted for.”
His breath smells sweet and his cheeks are becoming rough with stubble. She smiles, and his smile broadens in response. He really is very charming, and she doesn’t get the sense that it’s disingenuous. 
“And which contributions were those?” she asks cheekily. 
“Well, for starters, slapping that soda out of your hand,” he says ruefully. “Not my smoothest move.”
“Fair enough, though in any future circumstances where you see me actively drinking poison, you have my blessing to slap it out of my hand,” she counters. 
“Actually,” he says, sitting up, “I think my real mistake was saying I wanted to open your door for you. Way too unbelievable; even eight year olds know that chivalry is dead.”
She studies the side of his face while he takes a long drink of his soda, trying to decide if he’s being facetious. 
“You’re actually quite chivalrous, Mulder,” she says, careful with her tone so that he doesn’t think she’s teasing him. “You open doors for me all the time. The only odd thing about it was announcing your intention to do so across a parking lot.”
He gives her a long sideways glance that sets off a nervous flutter in her belly, though she couldn’t say why. 
“Does that bother you?” he asks, genuine concern in his voice. “Is it too patriarchal?”
“No,” she says immediately, and she can instantly see relief in his face. “Maybe it would if I felt like you didn’t respect me, or saw me as inferior, but you’ve never made me feel that way.”
She watches him fight off a prideful little smile before he lifts his soda can and hides it behind a drink. When he lowers the can back to his lap, his mouth is arranged into a neatly neutral expression. 
“Can I confess something?” he asks, his eyes flitting between her face and the wall behind her.
Her stomach does a backflip and her mouth goes dry. She takes a drink of her soda before answering
“Sure.”
“When we were with the Eves, I kept thinking about Samantha,” he says, pausing to gauge her reaction. She’s surprised, though she shouldn’t be; the Eves are eight, the same age Samantha was when she was taken. She smiles at him sadly, and he lowers his head. “It probably contributed to me not picking up on some red flags,” he continues. “I think I was having a little too much fun with it.”
She can’t allow him to wallow in his shame alone, as much as it terrifies her to consider admitting to her own flights of fancy regarding Mulder, herself, and a couple of kids. She slides one hand over his back and gives him a reassuring pat. 
“It was kind of fun,” she admits. “Until it wasn’t, anyway. And you were really good with them, Mulder.”
When he lifts his head to look at her, his face is much closer to hers than she was prepared for, and she resists the urge to move away. His eyes lock on hers and her heart picks up a little, anticipating something. 
“You really think so?” he asks, his eyes narrowing in self-doubt. 
Scully swallows and nods. 
“Yeah,” she says, but her voice comes out in a barely audible rasp. 
Two beats pass. Three. It starts to become awkward. It feels like they’re waiting for something, but neither of them appears to know what. By the fourth beat it’s unbearable and she looks away, withdrawing her hand from his back. 
“I should let you go,” she says, her entire body humming. 
“You kicking me out?” he asks playfully. “You have a boy coming over?”
She looks at him sharply. 
“What? No,” she says insistently, finding herself extremely bothered by the idea that he’d think that. 
Mulder laughs and shakes his head as he stands, tossing his empty soda can into the wastebasket and then holding his hand out to her. Slowly, cautiously, she slips her hand into his. For a second he doesn’t do anything, but then his fingers close around hers and he pulls her up in one sharp tug, and she lets out a surprised squeal just before the front of her body crashes into his. She wraps her other arm around his waist to avoid losing her balance, the half-empty soda can still in her hand, and then looks up at his face. 
He’s smirking devilishly, his hooded eyes full of mischief, and she suddenly feels like prey that’s fallen into his trap. The rational part of her mind is warning her to put a stop to this immediately, but she’s too hypnotized by the hungry way he’s looking at her to move. They’re pressed together from chest to pelvis, though their height difference means that his belt buckle is digging into her belly button, his groin bracketed by her hip bones. 
“I was just offering to take your can,” he says, a little bit sheepishly, and Scully feels the hot rush of embarrassment flood through her veins. Too ensnared to quickly get away, she drops her forehead against his chest to hide her face. 
“Oh,” she says, her eyes screwed shut tight and her mouth grimacing. “Sorry.”
She feels the vibration of Mulder’s chuckle in her skull, and then his hand running from between her shoulder blades to the small of her back. She shivers involuntarily, and he pulls her increments closer. 
“Don’t be,” he says, the pitch of his voice deeper than moments before. 
He doesn’t let go, and neither does she. Their joined hands are still pinned between the front of her shoulder and his rib cage, her soda-carrying arm wrapped around his waist. His hand on her back shifts down a little, and she only realizes that her body has at some point drawn an invisible line that Mulder’s casual touches never cross when he crosses it. She feels her skin tingle just above the crack of her ass, and she slowly lifts her head off his chest. 
His expression is somewhat vacant, his eyes zeroed in on her mouth. She lifts her chin and closes her eyes, allowing herself to believe that she won’t be responsible for what happens next. When she feels the heat of his mouth against hers, she begins to melt and simply doesn’t stop. 
Her body softens and leans into his, her neck bending languidly to the side as his lips warm her skin. She keeps her eyes carefully closed, suspending her own reality and receiving whatever reality this is. The one where a man who she trusts implicitly, who respects her, who looks damn good in a suit and tie, is tugging her blouse out of the waist of her slacks and running his rough fingertips up her bare back. The one where he asks for her consent half a dozen times, and she gives it over and over. The one where he strikes the perfect balance of dominance and deference, where he picks her up like she’s made of air and lays her down on the bed, then turns the lights off without her having to ask. 
It’s not that she has any illusions that it’s more than sex, and she honestly wouldn’t even want it to be. They’re completely incompatible, and that’s to say nothing for the potential impact to her career were she to become entangled in some kind of romantic relationship with her partner. But he’s cute, and he eats pussy like a god, and when she finally gets her hands on his dick she’s unable to stop herself from moaning in anticipation. 
They don’t have a condom, but she’s still on birth control after her breakup with Ethan, and she trusts him to pull out. She also trusts him when he tells her he hasn’t been with anyone in years, that he’s been tested. She trusts him with her body, her life. She trusts him more than she’s ever trusted any man she’s allowed inside her. 
He stretches her wide and she gasps from the pain, her fingernails digging into his shoulder. He stops, waiting until he feels her relax, and then rocks his hips slowly as she adjusts to him. She can’t comprehend how instinctively he touches her, how well he seems to know her body after such a brief introduction. He teases her to the edge and back more times than she can count until she finally shatters into a fit of gasps and wails, every cell in her body taking part in her orgasm. He pulls out of her sharply, the thick head of his cock brushing against the sensitive nerve endings around her opening and setting her off again as she feels the wet heat of his cum streaking across her belly. He slumps down beside her and they catch their breath in the murky dark, still too hopped up on dopamine to consider the impact of what they’ve just done. 
Eventually, Mulder feels his way into the bathroom for a towel, but instead of handing it to her he presses it between her legs, gently swiping up and then mopping his semen off her belly. It’s so tender, it catches her off guard, and she suddenly worries whether this means something to him that she’s not ready for. 
“Mulder—” she starts, but he lays a heavy hand on her naked hip to quiet her. 
“It’s okay,” he says, not sounding nearly as concerned as she does. “Wild night.”
Scully heaves a relieved sigh, nodding in the dark. 
“Yes. Wild night,” she agrees. 
He waits until she’s dressed to turn on the bedside lamp, and they both squint as their eyes adjust. He’s still shirtless, his pants on but unbuttoned, and she’s surprised to feel her clit throb at the sight of him. He smiles at her fondly, plucking her soda can off the floor and tossing it into the trash can with his. 
“See you tomorrow?” he asks, pulling on his undershirt. 
“Yep,” she says. 
It’s a little bit awkward, but not as much as she would have thought. 
She sits on the bed as she watches him leave, precluding an attempt at a goodnight kiss, and he pauses halfway through the door, looking back at her expectantly. 
“What?” she asks, a flush of worry making her belly tighten. Maybe this was a mistake. 
“You were really good with them too. The Eves, I mean,” he says, a nervous smile on his mouth. “You’re a natural.”
“Thank you, Mulder,” she says, feeling her cheeks warm. “Goodnight.”
“Goodnight,” he says, and then he is gone. 
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writing-in-sin · 1 year
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KaiShin scene fic idea: Kyoto arc
I dunno if it'll just be a part of a fic or a fic itself based on the idea of Kaito being there in Kyoto too simply to keep his reckless Tantei-kun safe but I just want Kaito to be there in Kyoto
Shinichi doesn't want to admit it, but he's happy and excited to have KID around not unlike when he mistakenly thought Vermouth was Kaito
It could be a willing favour he takes up when Haibara and Hakase told him about the school field trip (in this fic idea, they've come to a truce after the Bell Tree Express). While they dont know his identity yet, they do know Kaito hangs out at Blue Parrot since Jii is a friend of Hakase's
Anyways, since I headcanon that Kaito is a year older than Shinichi, Shinichi has a habit of calling Kaito 'senpai' or 'Kai' in private moments. While he has all the clues for KID's identity, Shinichi keeps it to himself as a sign of trust until KID himself does the reveal
Which Kaito does when he waits by his motorcycle at the hotel's entrance, phone in hand
---------
"Hello?" Shinichi answers, standing with the rest of his class as they wait for their teacher's instruction and feeling a little confused at the unknown number
A familiar voice chuckles, dark and smooth with dangerous mischief. "A little Ojou-chan told me that you're doin' something reckless without me. Which, unfair, so I'd thought of joining you."
"...hah?"
"What's wrong, Shinichi?" Ran asks
But Shinichi can't hear anything besides the thumping of his heart, anticipation and excitement coursing through him. "Are you--?"
"Look up, Tantei-kun."
And he does, eyes finding KID on instinct across from him and without realizing it, a beaming smile blooms across his face not unlike the sunflowers KID likes to give him
"Senpai!" a breathy laugh tumbles out, disbelief and excitement mixing as Shinichi jogs up to KID
KID pushes away from his bike, wearing his preferred style of clothing that he rarely wears around Ekoda to avoid questions about his more powerful physique because of his life as a phantom thief
Noting this, Shinichi takes in KID under the sunlight for the first time. The pitch black hair. The gold eyes that darkens into indigo-violet when they reach his pupils. The blue jeans and black leather jacket over a white v-neck that hides absolutely nothing of the powerful body underneath
But its the familiar roguish grin on a dangerously handsome face, the dark glint dancing in those summer night eyes that will always gives KID away
Shinichi reaches out, hand on cool leather above a beating heart and chuckles when it doesn't fade away into an illusion. "You're here. Under the sunlight."
"Thought it was about time that Kuroba Kaito gets to spend time with you too, Tantei-kun." Kaito smiles, soft and private when shocked blue eyes snap up at him as he tucks a sunflower behind Shinichi's ear. "Not like you didn't already know who I am though, hm, Meitantei?"
Shinichi blinks before returning the smile and lightly punches a sturdy shoulder. "Wanted you to tell me when you were ready, barou."
Kaito snickers
They break apart when a teacher calls out. "Would you be Kuroba-kun by any chance? The volunteer for the tour?"
"That's me." Giving a showman's bow, Kaito smiles with cool politeness and offers a rose to the woman. "At your service."
Amused at the flustered teacher, Shinichi raises a brow at the magician. "Volunteer?"
"I spend a lot of my time here because of a family friend." Kaito grins, sneaking an arm around Shinichi's waist to pull the detective close. His grin widens when Shinichi merely rolls his eyes before settling into his side, used to his antics by now. "So who better than me to offer a tour for this ancient capital?"
Shinichi huffs. "A local?"
"Ah, but knowing me, does that answer still stand?"
Knowing by now that KI- Kaito can most likely impersonate a local from decades past, Shinichi shakes his head. "Fine, fine."
They share a laugh, making their way to where the rest of Teitan are
-----
That's all I've got for now. If you've read this up until the end, thank you so much! I hope you enjoyed it
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