#summoning spell

[badstitched]

₊✩₊˚. 𓆩 A Study in Bats 𓆪 .⋆☾⋆₊✧ Have you ever tried to just will some bats to come to you? It's dusk, so the sky is darkening, the wind picks up, you see little silhouettes of bugs, and you wish… real hard… COME TO ME, BATS. It's ok if they don't come, you aren't speaking the right words. Try reading and stitching this book, A Study in Bats, and they'll come right to you.

Find the pattern in my etsy, currently on sale. along with all my other bat patterns.

[erophonemic]

slobbery head from a trans fag

[jotun-philosopher]

D&D monster: Vengeance Goose

This was inspired by a tumblr post which I've seen in screenshot form on imgur from time to time, though I'm having trouble tracking down the original post; the gist of it is, "don't wish death on your enemies -- wish geese on them. Infinite geese."

This appealed to my sense of humour, hence the following monster statblock (partly cribbed from the 'giant goose' from the 5e supplement Bigby Presents: Glory of the Giants, specifically some of the stats and the Actions section, especially the 'Thunderous Honk' move; it was the most goose-y statblock I could find) and accompanying summoning spell. Both monster and spell are deliberately overpowered jokes, so DMs, be judicious in using them with your table -- but if you do, definitely drop me a line because I'd LOVE to hear how it goes! (There's always one Big Bad Evil Guy who'd be soooooo satisfying to take down via swarm of cactus-wielding geese >:D Mwahahaha!!!)

In my mind, this monster resembles a Canada Goose (albeit larger), but feel free to sub in whichever type of goose you consider to be especially vicious b******s! :D

------

Long ago, a wizard specialising in transmutation magic (and not getting out in the fresh air enough) was seeking a more satisfying means than mere death for getting one over on his enemies. Remembering an incident in his youth and a plant from his homeland, he captured some local geese and magically engineered them to have enhanced aggression and the abilities to single-mindedly pursue a specified target and cast cactus-summoning magic.

Unfortunately for him, his original test subjects got loose and worked out their (very understandable) grudges against him, before escaping and mingling with the local goose population. Their descendants have lost none of their aggression or spellcasting ability, and are known to be violently territorial even by the standards of goose-kind, at least where non-avian intruders are concerned.

A group of adventurers who investigated the wizard's tower after his demise found his notes and managed to reverse-engineer them, creating a spell with which to summon one or more Vengeance Geese into temporary existence to assail an immediately present target. This spell is generally safe for adventuring mages to use; attempting to capture and tame Vengeance Geese from the wild is overwhelmingly discouraged by all reputable druidic organisations and any rangers with half an ounce of sense.

Vengeance Goose

Medium Beast, typically Chaotic Neutral

Armour Class: 16 (natural armour) Hit Points: 120 (16d8+48) Speed: 30ft., fly 30ft.

STR 18 (+4) DEX 14 (+2) CON 17 (+3) INT 12 (+1) WIS 18 (+4) CHA 12 (+1)

Saving Throws Dexterity +8, Constitution +6, Charisma +7

Skills Insight +7, Perception +7, Intimidation +7

Damage Resistances magical bludgeoning/slashing/piercing, force, poison

Damage Immunities piercing (own conjured cacti only), thunder

Condition Immunities blinded, charmed, deafened, exhausted, frightened, paralysed, poisoned

Senses truesight 30ft., darkvision 60 ft., tremorsense 30 ft., passive Perception 17

Languages Understands Common, Infernal, Celestial and Draconic but can't speak

Challenge 8 (3900 XP) Proficiency Bonus +3

Traits

Aggressive As a bonus action, the goose can move up to its speed toward a hostile creature it can see.

Magic Resistance The goose has advantage on saving throws against spells and other magical effects.

Action Surge (1/day) The goose can push itself through sheer vindictive aggressiveness to take one extra nonmagical action on its turn.

Innate Spellcasting The goose's spellcasting ability is Wisdom (spell save DC 17). The goose can innately cast the following spells, requiring no material components:

At will: Primal Savagery (2d10 acid damage)

3/day each: Ensnaring Strike (3d6 piercing damage/turn), Conjure Barrage (piercing damage), Plant Growth (1-action version only, goose takes no movement penalty from conjured plants), Grasping Vine

Cactus Growth The goose's Plant Growth spell exclusively creates cacti. A creature who comes into contact with these cacti gets pieces stuck to them, which inflict 1d6 piercing damage at the start of each of its turns until it or one of its allies uses an action to remove the pieces, making a DC 15 Dexterity save to avoid getting cactus'd in turn. The goose uses pieces of the cacti for its Conjure Barrage spell.

Actions

Multiattack The goose makes one Beak attack and either two Wing attacks or one Wing attack and one use of Spellcasting.

Beak Melee Weapon Attack: +7 to hit, reach 10 ft., one target. Hit: 11 (2d6 + 4) bludgeoning damage.

Wing. Melee Weapon Attack: +7 to hit, reach 5 ft., one target. Hit: 9 (1d10 + 4) bludgeoning damage, and the target must succeed on a DC 17 Strength saving throw or have the prone condition.

Thunderous Honk (Recharge 5–6) The goose honks with ear-splitting volume. Each other creature within 30 feet of the goose must make a DC 15 Constitution saving throw. On a failed save, a creature takes 16 (3d10) thunder damage and has the deafened condition until the start of the goose's next turn. On a successful save, a creature takes half as much damage only. The honk can be heard within 300 feet.

Spell: Summon Vengeance Goose

Summon Vengeance Goose

1st-level conjuration

Casting time: 1 action

Range: 30 feet

Components: V, S, M (a goose feather and a fragment of cactus)

Duration: Special

You designate a target within range that you can see and that is hostile to you, and call forth one Vengeance Goose, which manifests in an empty space within range. The Goose shares your initiative count, taking its turn directly after yours, and attacks its designated target relentlessly. It disappears when either it or its target is reduced to 0 hit points.

At higher levels When you cast this spell with a spell slot of 2nd level or higher, 1d20 extra Vengeance Geese are summoned for each slot level above 1st. These extra geese can all manifest at once, or appear 1d20 at a time on each of your turns after casting until all of the bonus geese are accounted for or the designated target falls to 0 hit points (you choose when you cast the spell).

Classes: Druid, Sorcerer, Wizard

Note: I went for the limited-but-still-potentially-amusingly-high number of geese because infinite geese, while very much in the spirit of the post that inspired this homebrew, would have some potentially awkward consequences; see the What If xkcd article 'A Mole of Moles' for more information.

Happy dungeoneering!

[gloombby]

@boylikermenlover come back online 🪄🪄🪄🪄🪄🪄🪄🪄🪄🪄

[probablybadrpgideas]

Circle of protection against capitalism

[luke769comics]

Haiku Haiku Hai

Haiku Haiku haiku hai

Haiku haiku hai

[hellsitegenetics]

...is this reaching you?

A little animal, on the floor of my chamber. I think I know what you are looking for.

You're stuck in a cycle, a repeating pattern. You want a way out.

Know that this does not make you special - every living thing shares that same frustration. From the microbes in the processing strata to me, who am, if you excuse me, godlike in comparison.

The good news first. In a way, I am what you are searching for. Me and my kind have as our purpose to solve that very oscillating claustrophobia in the chests of you and countless others. A strange charity - you the unknowing recipient, I the reluctant gift. The noble benefactors? Gone.

The bad news is that no definitive solution has been found. And every moment the equipment erodes to a new state of decay. I can't help you collectively, or individually. I can't even help myself.

For you though, there is another way. The old path. Go to the west past the Farm Arrays, and then down into the earth where the land fissures, as deep as you can reach, where the ancients built their temples and danced their silly rituals. The mark I gave you will let you through.

Not that it solves anyone's problem but yours.

String identified: … t acg ? A tt aa, t ca. t at a g . ' tc a cc, a atg att. at a a t. tat t t a ca - g tg a tat a tat. t c t cg tata t , a, c , g ca. T g t. a a, a at a acg . a a a t tat catg cata t ct a ct t. A tag cat - t g ct, t ctat gt. T act? G. T a tat t t a . A t t t t a tat ca. ca't cct, a. ca't . tg, t at a. T at. G t t t at t a Aa, a t t t at t a , a a ca ac, t act t t t a ac t ta. T a ga t tg. t tat t a' t .

Closest match: Cetonia aurata genome assembly, chromosome: 8 Common name: European Rose Chafer

(image source)

[bjfinn]

Sign languages are not considered to be spoken (you don't say that you "speak" ASL, you say that you "know" it), and since his name must be "spoken unbroken", signing his name wouldn't work.

Writing his name could possibly work if he were literate lol -- but since he says "Jesus I can't spell" I wonder if he would recognise his name in writing.

There is another option, though -- the Sanskrit/Avestan name for Betelgeuse is "Ardra", and there's an alchemical/astrological symbol associated with it:

If this symbol were to be written three times, it would likely work for someone who was unable to speak. (Ignore the "Lunar Station No. 6" lol.)

Hope this helps!

Beetlejuice poll

all right fans, put on your thinking caps

A situation has come up in an rp that has me scratching my head.

Everyone knows that you have to say Beetlejuice's name three times to summon him. But what if someone is mute? Can they sign "Beetlejuice" or finger spell his name and it works? What if they're deaf and they can't pronounce it? Would writing down his name and reading it be enough for him to appear?

I have my own opinions on it, but am interested other's thought and the possibilities that could come of it.

[flamingpudding]

A lot can happen in 1 minute

And the worst part was Bruce had not been able to do anything to stop the chaos as all of this started right in the middle of a Gala, his children and him attended.

Bruce could do nothing but watch with growing internal horror as he stared at what was happening before him, champagne glass still in hand.

It all started with a fanatic suddenly getting the entire galas attention. Screaming something about Bruce Wayne will fall for them as they slammed some sort of magic duck thingy on the ground.

A second later, John Constantine, off all people, appeared yelling about finally finding the lad that stole a highly dangerous artifact while green smoke rose towards the ceiling of the hall.

By now some guest have started screaming and started to evacuate while other appeared curious thinking this was some sort of show. And shamefully Bruce had to admit that he lost sight of his children during this.

Though not even 10 seconds after Constantines entrance Bruce spied one of his children, Nightwing, crashing into the hall in gear and tackling the fanatic that was now yelling something at the smoke about fulfilling their end of the deal and granting their wish of tying Bruce Wayne to them.

5 seconds later he noticed Constantine was chanting something and the gathering smoke below the ceiling now started to glow.

At this point Bruce really wanted to dip out and join the scene as Batman but was rooted in place by a buisness partner clinging to him and trying to pull him to safety.

Another 3 seconds passed, and the smoke glowed brightly in Lazarus green. Worried Bruce tried to at least find one of his other children aside from the one that was still wrestling with the fanatic and was internally horrified to make eye contact with a wide eyed Jason and his glowing green eyes.

In the following 7 seconds he had tried to get to his son, but before he could even manage to get rid of the buisness partner still holding on to him a bright light blinded everyone for another 4 seconds.

Once their sight returned it took them another 5 seconds to realize that one the smoke was gone, two John Constantine was cursing up a storm holding a black haired kid and three the fanatic used the light to escape.

There was a stunned silence of 3 seconds before John Constantine looked around the room and suddenly zeroed down on Bruce. Bruce did not stiffen as the Brite looked at him with narrowed eyes, then down at the teen in his arms before marching over to him within the next ten seconds.

"You! You're Bruce Wayne, right? Congratulations, you got another kid via magic now. Here is the kid and my card. Call me if anything weird is happening with them." Before Bruce could even say anything, the teen was disposed into his arms together with John's apparent business card. The magican turned away from Bruce before marching over to his son in gear and starting to drag him out.

"Nightwing! Help me catch this bloody magic thief before some other summoning shit with stolen artifacts to spice up another rich guys ball or whatever goes down! I got a tracker spell on them! And call Bats while you're at it"

Right at the one minute mark. The chaos concluded to the point that Bruce Wayne was standing in the middle of a gala with a teen in his arm that was apparently magically made to be his and the fanatics child.

That was when the next kind of chaos broke out as his reminding children fought their way over to him through the suddenly coming back to live press and reporters that started to bombard him with questions about the unconscious teen in his arms.

[fricc-darn]

Halloween double trouble (＃ﾟДﾟ) !!

(its never too late for halloween)

[mcybree]

[nelkcats]

Klarion's new interest

Young Justice was busy recently, this was because Klarion had been extremely active, attacking continuously. When they asked him about it in one of their battles, he said that the Order of Chaos had found "The key to immortality and absolute power over the dead" something that really did not interest him, so he distanced himself from the matter.

Young Justice forgot to inform the Justice League of this event due to how exhausted they felt. They remembered it at the moment that the Order of Chaos appeared again in a warehouse, although this time they seemed to have a hostage.

Danny had only spent 5 minutes with the cultists for the week and he was already getting tired. Cultists had a weird name and were complaining about a "failed spell", something about them wanting to attract someone very powerful and he coming instead, which, rude, but he wasn't going to correct them either.

Danny wondered if it was worth getting out of the chains, but that would probably tell them he was more than "a normal teen" so he didn't, either way Clockwork would probably warn him if he was in danger. He yawned, bored with all the talk and met the gaze of a boy with his hair in the shape of horns watching him carefully, he looked great. The halfa greeted him happily and the boy looked doubly confused.

Danny also noticed the people in colorful costumes on the roof but he didn't care much. The cultists seemed to come to terms and led him to the center of the circle, Danny raised an eyebrow as they performed the spell again. It didn't seem to work, as he vanished for a few seconds and reappeared in the same place.

"You're not very good at magic are you?" Danny asked with amusement, Klarion took a little more interest in him.

When all the heroes descended and most of them stopped paying attention to him, Danny looked at the cool haired guy (the only one staring) and grinned with all his fangs, winking at him (with his toxic green eyes) before disappear from sight.

[swiggity-swexual-i-am-asexual]

Danny Phantom doesn’t want to be king.

And the Observants also don’t want him to be king.

Frankly, very VERY few people want him to be king, dead or alive.

But opening the sarcophagus, even if it’s closed NOW, disrupted some magic protections. Until those can be fixed, summoning spells need to be answered by SOMEONE. Not all of summons, just like—once a month or so. Because if they don’t let that power outlet happen, all of those summon magics build up and suddenly Pariah Dark reigns again. Answering the summon basically dispels the built up magic, like opening a dam.

Again, Danny doesn’t WANT to do this either, but everyone else involved is a bad choice. He won’t even be named prince, because THEN that implies he COULD be king. He needs a title, of some kind, a position in the court, no matter how tenuous, so he can do the thing. Something where no one in their right or even WRONG mind would think to try to kill him for the position or try to marry him or something equally annoying to deal with.

So.

He becomes the Ghost Court Jester.

He even gets a fancy little outfit upgrade when he’s summoned, all black and white bell hats and shoes, a stupid little ruffle collar and black parachute pants, even face paint with a tiny dot of glowing neon green at the tip of his nose. The works. Better yet, if he hasn’t been ‘unsummoned’, his human form is just the exact same costume with swapped colors. He can change into his normal outfits, but until that circle has been disrupted, the next summon, or the next full or new moon, he’s stuck into the outfit when he first transforms from either form.

The Phantom Jester, which is a title more intimidating than Danny appears to be if we are to be honest, cracks jokes and never, EVER takes the summons seriously.

“Listen, I just had to get my hours in and it’s the last day of the lunar month, you got lucky I came at all.”

“I got the position by virtue of not wanting to go to Time Jail for a crime I technically didn’t commit and technically probably won’t but, well, eyes are the beholder of the grudge or something else equally cryptic to make you mad.”

“Is this a slumber party? … do you have cake? Bummer. Well, enjoy the bleeding walls then.”

“Whether I help you or not is entirely dependent on how well of a run down you can give me on this book I have to read that I have not at all touched.”

“Explain the reason in three sentences or less. I suggest less. And if it’s stupid I’m hitting you—oh you think this circle can contain me? Haha. It won’t.”

“Is that chicken blood? Why?? What did the chickens do to you?”

There are props in his costume but he literally never knows what he’s gonna pull out of his sleeves. Danny can’t even do a balloon animal and knows exactly zero card tricks, which would be more of an issue if the cards weren’t the size of a dinner plate. He barely even juggles and he’s honestly probably just utilizing his rarely-used telekinetic powers, but he does give people flowers if they haven’t been a total jerk. And if those flowers are like, rare and have seeds for propagation, well… he literally wouldn’t know. No, really, he doesn’t. He gets summoned by at least two ecology departments and he has no idea why, I mean, if he had a nickel—

He also had pies and is NOT afraid to use them.

[frenchublog]

suit tutorial

[hana-no-seiiki]

YANDERE! HERO: I’m here to save you, your highness!

YANDERE! HERO: And potentially get married!

YANDERE! HERO: And have your ki—

YANDERE! DEMON LORD(Who’s also your husband): How many times must I banish you, hero? They’re not interested!

READER: No, darling. Let me handle him this time.

READER: *sighs cause they’ve been dealing with yan! hero’s antics since childhood*

READER: *inhales* FIREBALL!

[willowaddison]