You know something I don't think I've ever seen people talk about is how Freddie changed the lyrics for Big Spender.
Because in case you don't know, all original versions of the song are sung by women - and it is made very clear that they are singing to men:
The minute you walked in the joint
I could see you were a man of distinction
A real big spender
[....]
So let me get right to the point:
I don't pop my cork for every man I see
Hey, big spender
Spend a little time with me
Probably not too surprising, then, that when Queen performed this song in 1974 Freddie had to do a bit of a gender-switch on it:
Though, it would probably be more accurate to say that Freddie made this song gender-neutral because he didn't change it to be about a woman. He eliminated the first use of "man" entirely and then sang "I don't pop my cork for everyone I see" (instead of "every man").
And honestly there's probably a whole dissertation you could write just about those changes alone, but what I really love is when Queen brought the song back in 1986 and Freddie changed the lyrics again:
Because yes he still dropped the first "man" but the "everyone" is changed and Freddie instead sang "every guy" with just the barest hint of a "-rl" sound at the end to give him plausible deniability if anyone asked about it.
So much of Freddie's music speaks to his experiences as a queer man but, because of the nature of the times in which he lived, he couldn't always be directly open about that fact. Most of his love songs are intentionally vague, and he sang about "somebody" or "you" to avoid having to use gendered terms as much as possible.
Freddie singing "I don't pop my cork for every GUYrl I see" wasn't just an adjustment to the original lyrics, it was a specific change from how Freddie had sang it before in order to make it more gay in a way that he could rarely be with his own music, and that is what I adore about this. It's such a little thing, but it gives such a unique insight into how Freddie balanced his sexuality and his stardom, and how the relationship between those two changed over the nearly 12 years between these performances.
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Only 5 days left in the 1980s
December 26, 1989. Tuesday. Espresso Cafe, Modesto, California
So, only five days left to “feel” the 80’s. Who om I now? For once out on the great “see” of the 90’s, which will rush more and more quickly toward the raging head waters of the next century, our little peace pool of time here will be long gone. It’s chance for seeing through compulsion is lost. So, as in place, sometimes in time we find ourselves at the crossroads . So, what do ya do with it? You back off from the bigger, major world to allow that calling to come through. Which is what I’m doing today. So, what am I after these crazy 80’s? Well, really and truly, what I am is simply truer, deeper version of what I was.
I held many mirrors up to my face in the 80’s in dark rooms so I could see—
The mirror of marriage, of private law practice, of 3rd year law student, of the bar exam, of new attorney, , of law firm attorney, of public defender
In a mirror, one sees what one is and what one is not.
The image of the money seeker did not appear, nor did that of the loving partner and father, nor did that of the well dressed beauty or of the world traveler. All of these came up, filtered in and melted away in the heat of their own reflection. In times like today, I hold the mirror up to see these images gone or greatly reduced.
And, who looks back?
Me.
Who was looking out on 12/31/1979? And who, after all these years, is still looking out?
A lover of life. A lover of active tear paper art. A lover of deep fault line need to be, to know,. A lover of great pain juxtaposed to great beauty. A lover of fight for truth in his own way. Through the courts in word, deed, action. Through holding melting hands and whispy hearts that form solid images, more solid than any flesh and blood.
I see a sweet repository of the now brittle yet fragrant petals of flowers once full, now withered.
I apply my fire time and time again and am rewarded with a fragrance bittersweet that won’t die but enhances all life it touches.
I see a clearer image of the healing power of the word
”no”.
I see guts, and bravado and gaudy humor and touch of Devine scarlet self pity.
I see an expanding of the love of the pause—of the listen.
I see others, too, in the mirror.
Not so much in a line, like in ’79 or invisible,but, more in a circle all with darks and lights that interlock or don’t here and there but form a union and unity just the same..
And, ya know, I truly believe that there ain’t much I gotta do. I t just lives itself through me. Guess I just got to ease up and let it live, laugh, dance, cry, scream, be , create, waltz through me!
End of entry
Notes: 6/3/2024
In the 1980’s I married a woman, woke up to the fact I was gay, left the marriage before we had children. I worked with people with Aids and helped them through their illness and death through an organization called Han to Hand and another called the Stanislaus County Aids Project. I wrote in coffee house like Espresso Cafe and I journaled through the entire decade.
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YALL I FUCKING DID IT I GOT MY RESULTS QUICKLY AND I BARELY GOT THERE BY 82% 😭😭😭 I DESERVE SUM FOODDD
Like I swear to God...I was looking at the first page of that test and everything that I have learned fucking went out Satan's den cuz I couldn't dig that bitch out anymore ...like it divorced me with the ring included on the kitchen counter with no explanations 💀💀...
I could have sworn I guessed on like 5 of em but u know what ....I ain't got nobody thank besides my daddies of the fictional world ..cuz half of that test was engulfed with thots of those men besides the equations I should have been filling out 🤡
ANYWAYYYYYY IM FINALLY FREEEE ✨️🩷🗣
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