#such a stupid ship lmao I hate them so much (affectionate)

[andro-dino]

I’ve been thinking so much about them recently I’m not gonna lie

[sanchezsimp]

Here are my random Rick Sanchez headcanons because why not!

TW: mentions of self harm !!

- He cries himself the fuck to sleep every night. If he doesn't, then he drinks until he's asleep, or works on a project. He can't just lay there, he'll overthink and get no rest.

- He often has nightmares about Diane or Morty

- He likes musicals. Because I say so.

- Have you seen how he likes his cereal?? I imagine he likes his coffee hella sugary too- With too much creamer, whipped cream, and rainbow sprinkles on top!

- He totally met and had a crush on Ford Pines. I know I ship them, but I headcanon that when they knew each other, Ford never actually returned that feeling. (I could probably elaborate on some of my Ford headcanons later... Oh! Maybe I can make another post of my headcanons for when they knew each other?) And they broke up (as friends) when Ford decided that Rick is, not only an asshole, but fucking insane.

- More on that last one-- I imagine that Rick would often have revenge fantasies about Prime. Constantly imagining the pain he wanted to inflict on him in graphic detail. (I headcanon that at some point, Ford found out somehow and was horrified.)

- He only stays still when he's overthinking. Otherwise, he's constantly stimming or making stupid noises (whenever he's not talking or occupying himself). He gets extremely fucking bored. He needs constant stimulation, always needs to be doin' something.

- He has scars on his arm and cuts frequently. He cuts in shame of how he's lost his wife, and in shame of the fact that he cares for Morty, because he's so afraid of losing him... And he cuts because it's him who killed her. Not him-him, of course, but I imagine he also holds himself responsible because it WAS himself... in a way. Does this make sense to ya?

- He has to resist the urge to rip his fucking face apart every time he looks in a mirror. Because he doesn't see himself anymore. He sees Prime. And it hurts.

- He HATES mirrors.

- I imagine that sometimes when he's drunk, he's more affectionate to Morty in a rather unsettling way. Like, he'll hug him and praise him, and Morty would be just confused as fuck (at first anyways, until he gets used to it lmao).

- He has green eyes. It just... makes sense to me? I dunno, maybe I'll talk more about my RaM eye colour headcanons later.

- I headcanon that he got like, some sort of crazy hair removal on his pits- 'cause he had a lot in Lawnmower Dog, and in the past in comics (like Flesh Curtains... some of it anyways. Their inconsistency with his hair bothers me.), then never again. Unfortunately. GOD, I miss that hair. (I'm so normal I swear-)

- He knows damn well he looks strange, and there is no actual reason. He's aware he's just a character, and so there is no real WHY he looks like that, it's just character design. And he's fine with that.

- He likes cute things. He just... likes cute things. He adores Morty and he adores adorable animals! I headcanon he has a soft spot for cats specifically. This is also based off of how he had Mr. Frundles and his only defense was "It was cute! FUCK!"

That's all for now- I'll post more of this if this doesn't flop, lol

Thanks for readin'!! And don't hesitate to ask for my random headcanons of other characters or fandoms, I'll be happy to write 'em!!

[buff-electra-truther]

Stex Appreciation Month: Electra

Fav actor: Koffi Missah is the best overall.  I think the MJ/Prince train angle is the most effective characterization for Electra and he looks, acts, and sounds perfect for that approach.  It’s fun and recognizable in the cheap seats in a language you don’t know.  But it also has a lot of potential for depth, there’s a double entendre to be made about the government/big companies conspiring against electric trains for being too successful and certain tropes about electrical powers. 

Mykal Rand is basically impossible to beat aesthetically for me.  I cannot look away from the absurdity of how smooth and girly his face is combined with how cartoonishly ripped he is.  Even footage of him on tiny tour stages in beat up ill-fitting costumes is captivating. He’s just so extreme and maximalist yet alien looking.  

I’m surprisingly unpicky on Electra actors as long as they aren’t boring.  That’s the only real crime.  But I tend to prefer ones who have/could pull off Greaseball because I prefer a bolder, louder Electra (and basically require it post 2018 so I don’t forget he even exists with that borderline camoflouge costume)

Fav songs/scenes: Dinah’s Disco because I love watching him get shoved, a nice more intense version of AC/DC, anything involving No Comeback or its leitmotif.  Once again, What Time Is It? is a terrible song but purely redeemed because Mykal is hilarious in it.

Fav costumes: Broadway/Bochum toothpaste is a classic, but I’m also weirdly fond of Late London because I love the cartoony look (especially on Chris Copeland since he went all in on the makeup style to match)

Ships/Friendships: already went over how I view him and Greaseball the other day.

I like to look at pictures from the JPN/AUS tours out of context and think Electra looks cold and lonely and in need of a buddy and Caboose coaxes him into fun bad ideas

Headcanons: 

-I habitually call Electra “he” because it’s what canon does 90% of the time, but view the character as neutral (all of them really).  Electra and the Components are about the only ones smart enough to realize these forms are an illusion and there’s no reason to play by human paradigms, it would be equally stupid if they subscribed to blood type personalities too.  They are VERY smug about this but slowly the message is spreading.  

-I vary in what exact basis I’ll give him but see him as either irl, alternate timeline, or outright sci-fi Amtrak’s choice of successor to the GG1.  He isn’t weak or terribly delicate if the infrastructure works (unless you keep him as 40101 lol), he follows in their tracks of being a huge effortless machine that’ll run away with basically anything you stick on it.  If he actually played it clean, he’d probably dominate going uphill vs Greaseball and especially Rusty, he just doesn’t flaunt strength much in canon because it’s not relevant to the race.

-Electra is a  Fully Automated Bi Space Communist who wants to run catenaries across the Rocky Mountains and Siberia

-If you turn the dials and knobs Electra will morph like a game’s character slider just like how it’s simple to regear electric locos for passenger/freight use.  

Unpopular opinions:  lmao I think all my Electra preferences are moderately to very fandom unpopular.  I’m a contrarian who likes the character for fundamentally different reasons than most.  I’ve vaguely known of the character for years but didn’t really fall in love with him until recently when I saw those 2013 tour videos people either love or hate. Yeah they have the worst staging and costumes but I went “oh hell yeah finally a less problematic alternative to my blorbos Ganondorf and Velvet von Ragnar”.  I think those two names alone make it pretty clear why I like a bulkier, hotter natured, more affectionate and competent Electra than most.  I crave novelty and get bored by oversaturated things so I’m naturally drawn to androgynous characters that aren’t twinks or prettyboys so seeing Mykal vs the more typical tall skinny Electras really made me more interested in the character, even if I think there’s more interesting characterizations than his.  

[ochrearia]

I dont know a lot about your other interests buuuuut maybe your favorite dragon prince character for the character ask thing, if you want? :]

Stares at you with the biggest eyes ever I'm picking RAYLA BECAUSE SHES SO FUCKING DUMB AND I HATE HER BUT NO I DON'T

Favorite Thing About Them: Can I be so damn honest. We share trauma. Like okay not like 1:1 but her parents """died""" when she was young and she had to deal with that. I had to deal with death early too. Not a family member but a friend and her entire family. And like. That's still rather traumatizing for an 8-9 year old kid especially because it was a fucking PLANE CRASH but yeah. Death trauma early on where the person dying had a really fucked up death. Rayla kind of runs away from her problems and so do I. Puts it all on herself and doesn't think that she matters at all so "doing the right thing" gets in the way of staying alive and she's fine with that but doesn't really clock that dying for the cause is going to traumatize someone else. But that's so like... me. I talk about seeing myself in Pico but Rayla steals the similarity contest from him easy. Also elf but like come on DSFDGF Rayla is to blame for my elfsona and my continuous use of pointed ears in my sonas ever since

Least Favorite Thing About Them: Girl you're an asshole. Like I'm sorry she can be a wonderful person but oh my god I am never forgiving her dumbass for doing what she did to Callum in Through The Moon. Dawg. Fucking idiot. I dislike liars man I already got trust issues but this BITCHHHHH she tells Callum they will go find Viren together and then she turns around and leaves in the middle of the night without him and only leaves him a NOTE to wake up to. On his BIRTHDAY BY THE FUCKING WAY ON HIS BIRTHDAY. ARE YOU DUMB??? ARE YOU DUMB. She's gone for 2 years. Girl what the fuck that's your boyfriend. Or you know was lol what is your issue. Like I know, you've got trauma and you believed that you were protecting him by going alone so he wasn't in danger but hoLY SHIT YOU DID SO MUCH MORE DAMAGE TO HIM THAT WAY. Christ. You would think that him jumping off the Storm Spire to catch you and save you from a splat death would tell you his damn dedication to you Rayla. Rayla. Look me in the eyes Rayla you cannot keep thinking in this mentality. I fully understand the idea that you think leaving someone would save them because I've considered that too but NO!!!! NO GET A GRIP OHUHUH I HATE YOU FOR DOING THAT RAYLA

Favorite Line: "Callum, you may be a dummy but you're not a fool!" ("Am I supposed to feel flattered about this?") Rayla is the reason "dummy" is in my vocabulary. Like dummy but in an affectionate way because that's the only context she uses it and it's always with Callum.

brOTP: Rayla and Soren <3 Rayla being the completely fucking done with this bitch adopted sister and Soren being his normal stupid himbo ass self. I love Soren ??? But like that's for another day to talk about

OTP: Rayllum, lmao, because I am in fact basic as fuck and am shipping the thing the show is handing to me. Honestly though pre-season 4 I was lowkey fucking with Claudia and Rayla in fandom context bc realistically they would. Never. Rayla would hate her ass. And its not elf-human racism because Claudia's dating Terry it's just Rayla would HATE HERRR

nOTP: Man I don't even wanna talk about it I've seen some weird shit but I genuinely think I have seen at least one instance of Viren x Rayla and absolutely the FUCK not. But I guess for one that's not just weird as fuck Soren x Rayla because they're not romantic to me in any context ever sorry to the people that do consider it though

Random Headcanon: Hitting this fucker with the bigender beam I do NOT care. She's bigender and uses she/he pronouns like me because I SAID SO

Unpopular Opinion: sighs... I'm no Callum guys. I think she deserved to suffer in the consequences of her actions more. 2 years with nothing but a note and a broken promise. Callum's stronger than me dude like I get it you love her and I like love but god that would break my trust for way longer. They never even really talked about it either. He just kinda forgave her after awhile. And yeah Rayla throughout the seasons shows that she knows it's on her but I THINK SHE DESERVED TO GET YELLED AT AT LEAST ONE TIME OKAY

Song I Associate With Them: Mama's Gun by Glass Animals and I am going to REFUSE to explain why because it's a years old thing and I'm not changing it. But just. Yeah that one

Favorite Picture Of Them: I could be mean and say the one where she's staring at the metal flowers in Ethari's pond and obviously about to cry but I won't. I'll be nice.

My current one methinks. She's pretty :] Shakes her by the shoulders I wanna loOK LIKE YOU

[ferallester]

hoo boy good morning everybody!

I saw the video title a few hours ago when I first woke up, and immediately went back to sleep bc I knew I wouldn’t be able to handle it at that hour LMAO

I just saw the thumbnail properly too

this is… this is gonna be an absolute trip huh

live reaction under the cut bc I’m Terrified!

first of all: THOSE ARE THE SAME FUCKING SHIRTS

second of all: ‘nostalgia cannon to the face’

correction: that is in fact a different shirt that Phil is wearing, but it is ridiculously similar, what the hell

‘quintessential emo’ ‘I was serving twink Karen’

‘it’s just… us’ ‘it’s just us being stupid’

‘you’re giving us full sphincter on YouTube’

‘ass and foot baiting’

‘quite restrained’ it’s 2012 of course you’re being restrained

HEART EYES HOWELL COMING IN FULL FORCE WHILE PHIL ATTEMPTS TO TOUCH HIS NECK

I think I found their favourite part of pinof 4 (the cursed Justin Bieber and HMS QEII masks) (lmao imagine if they made actual masks of the boat)

wow those are some really ugly glasses phil

why DO you boys have bugspray in here

‘unless they pressed their noses TOGETHER’ *a sound that normal humans make*

why aren’t they reacting to the blooper videos you guys do know you have bloopers available right

official rating: mid

THE CURSED DAN FACE WAS ON THE SUNDAY TIMES—

oh that is so incredibly unfortunate, why did they use that particular video as a photo reference LMAOOOOO

also who scanned this particular copy what the hell happened to that page

thank you Dan for a recreation

either they don’t want to talk about it or they forgot about 2012

ah. ah that explains a lot about why pinof 5 Looks Like That

PHIL— DAN—

THEY HAD TO REFILM PINOF 5–

the wrecking ball

Dan is fucking relentless with his past self

‘tit tackle’

oh that’s mildly horrifying how low they can go, I think I found an ick

YOU MOTHERFUCKERS— NOT THE REAL VOICES—

I hate them

weirdly the vibes of pinof 5, at least with these idiots reacting to themselves, have gotten. so much worse

Dan able to predict what his past self would do next…

‘crack protected’

oh Phil

a gingerphobic goose…

‘I feel like you’ve recovered from that’ ‘:|’ ‘no?’ ‘A—’

I really hope someone makes a gif of them arguing over the old handshake from pinof 6 and this video

‘assigned mother’ y’know that makes sense actually

successful monkfish backwards!

Phil looks at the camera and Dan just looks at Phil at the end, STOP

they literally JUST used fireside.caf for the shoulder thing actually

the sexy end screen dance also like… horrifically iconic

I always forget about their weird noises they make at the end AND THE BOYS ARE AMUSED

Phil… Phil there’s 8 billion people… on earth… XD

this is the pinof that came out just before I got into them :0

Dan’s hair is. Awful

MOTHERFUCKER DON’T YOU FUCKING DARE SHOW US FESTIVE DITL

shoutout to the vyous tho

love that Phil actively remembers that Dan complained about the thickness of the whiskers

‘I AM BECOME YOU’ also cheese umbrella is still awful (affectionate) to this day

THEY BOTH USED THE SUNGLASSES EMOJI MOST RECENTLY

also hello lobster emoji I know exactly why you’re here

pæch

THEY MOSTLY REMEMBERED THE LIZARD SONG—

rip that peace lily

the anaconda scene…

the game does indeed still work

‘TIMMY LIKES IT’

WHAT THE FUCK DID DAN SAY— also I think I found the most iconic moment of this video so far, they’re just DYING—

TATINOF reference

shut the FUCK UP boys we KNOW you’re touching

as someone who once ate a lemon near-whole bc fruit and who regularly eats lemon and lime slices, their flinching is a fail

existential crisis :(

boys isn’t the time for the merch outdated???? anyway moving on

SLUTTY CATBOY

my calendar and sweater are FINALLY shipping btw and I’m so excited!!!!

THEY’RE GONNA DO A TIERLIST :D

PINOF 7!!!! NEXT EPISODE IS PINOF 7, FINALLY I’LL BE ABLE TO RELATE AGAIN

THEY FINISHED RECORDING POPPY PLAYTIME CHAPTER 2 AT FOUR????

‘danisshowinghole’ ‘amazingtimmy’ thanks!

oh my god I can’t wait for part three actually

[vacantgodling]

1, 12, and 18 (idk what fandoms you're in. i'm sorry 😞)

haha no worries!!! i don’t tend to do fandom as much anymore i am a big lurker 🌚 let’s do haikyuu again why not

1. the character everyone gets wrong

surprisingly i think most people peg the haikyuu characters very well. i’ve seen Less Egregious character takes in this fandom than i have in any other so kudos to everyone great work understanding the fucking source material lmao

12. the unpopular character that you actually like and why more people should like them

tbh idk what the popularity rating for all the characters is at This Point in time but MY FAVORITE haikyuu character is tanaka ryuunosuke. i’m not normal about him. i love him. he’s so funny and ridiculous but dependable and approachable and kind and charismatic (even if he don’t always think it) idk i’m obsessed with him and his bald head. tanaka is everything ok!! you want a hype man he’s your guy!!! you want a dependable senpai he’s always got your back!!! he’s hard working and doesn’t give up and fights for his dreams!!! like he’d been gunning for kiyoko since hs and he got her!!! we love a man with follow through!!!! fucking stop sleeping on tanaka just cuz he doesn’t have hair ok 😭😭 the man is gold

18. it's absolutely criminal that the fandom has been sleeping on...

TANANOYA. hate to bring shipping discourse into it BUT the number of fics that i have suffered through with some goddamn one sided tananoya or just tananoya in the bg or barely thought of like i’m hunting y’all for fucking SPORT. best friends to lovers pipeline. they’re so comfortable with each other that they have so many inside jokes and similar mannerisms. the i was so comfortable with you i didn’t realize it was love vibes!!!! TANAKA CONSTANTLY LIFTS NOYA INTO THE AIR FOR FUCKS SAKE. they’re already physically affectionate!! they’re stupid!!! dumb of ass!!! but they work hard they play hard they care about their friends and each other like DJDJDJDJ JUST BECAUSE NOYA HAD THE HANG UP ABOUT ASAHI DOESNT MEAN THAT ITS MEANT TO BEEEEEEE UGHHHHH. like so many people view it as explicit romantic vibes and i get why but i read it as more: noya was upset with asahi for giving up when they were all fighting for the same dream. like they were all crushed by that loss but they still came back together to try and do better yet you wanna sit out cuz what???? you can’t see the other side of the net????? i’m killing you. that’s the vibe i got from that whole fiasco. the stop trying to do it by yourself when we’re all here for you fuck you!!! energy. not the i’m in love with you and i won’t play without you. it was less to do with *asahi* and more to do with proving the point that they’re a TEAM and asahi is stubborn so noya went drastic. SO LIKE. that’s my two cents tananoya for life miss me with that asa//////noya shit

[watery-melon-baller]

:3

Hunter?

ive gotten TWO (and a half) asks can you tell. i have a favorite

What I like about them

hes such a bitch (affectionate) and also a NERD hes sweet and likes to learn and is just a little awkward hes trying his best.

What I dislike about them

he needs to stop running off into the wood whenever he is having a panick attack and start relying on others. get better coping machinaisms

Favourite moment

oughh hm. love like every flapjack and hunter moment (rip)

Least favourite moment

any sport in a storm had a few minutes where the second hand embarassment was so bad i could not handle it. im like stupid sensitive to that kind of stuff and sometimes i have to leave a room when its TOO much. my guy please. i do like the episode i dont hate it at all i just was like. incapable of watching it lmao

A situation with this character that I want to see explored more

augh like. everyday coven life stuff (this also goes for lilith too). id love to see like a day in the life kind of thing espeically like before lilith left the coven. what chaos goes on in the castle,,,

An interesting AU for this character

I HAVE LIKE A BILLION AUS FOR HUNTER. uh. i have my reverse au. i have the 55k fic i wrote where he accidentally kills belos and has to secretly run the goverbment (go read weekend at belos's its funny i promise). i hae an antimatic im working about him. i also had one for a while where pre-canon he ran away from belos and fled to the human realm and just. worked at the 7/11 down the street while living in the portal shack and luz befriended him. i wrote a few ficlets for it but never posted anything but its a fun au i had. it was Luz getting her first friend + hunter realizing that belos kind of sucked actually and camila trying to adopt this rabdom teenager her daughter found (she genuinly thinks luz is lying about him or is talking about one of her book characters and then after she meets hunter shes like oh ok. adoption) its fun

A crossover

i dont really have any crossovers hmmm,,,

OTP (or OT3+ etc…. just… favourite ship)

augh im like. all my favs i hit with an aroace beam so. not really lol

Other ships?

i kind of bounce bwteen bi hunter and aroace hunter but like. he should go through the struggle of "damn they're pretty" and also appprecuating your frieends beauty.

BROTP

him and luz!! again. worte an entire fic of their shenaningans. they are obnoxious and love each other. i also think something with hunter and the collector would be interesting but i dont know if they would like. get along and be best buds or anything. also him and gus!! adultified buddies but like. they're adultified in oppostite ways so they can combine to be One Whole Guy. thats how hunter and luz work btw but with being neurodivergent

NOTP

againt jusy like. no weird age gaps and incest yada yada.

An assortment of headcanons! 

OKAY

have the headcanon that belos like. shoved him into a caretaker role (which we see a Bit of in canon but i take it to an extreme). loves to play it up as "sick weak frail old man who needs his nephews help" so parentification yay. hes good at like cooking and cleaning and knows how to make a bunch of BI ersion of 16th century dishes. if something happens thenhunter feels guilty because its His respoinisbibly to take care of belos beacuse belos doesnt have anyone else!!! (false belos is juts a needuy bastard who wants to be taken sre of by his older brother and likes to play house wiht his grimwalkers. i have so many feelings about that btw)

he is just. such an isolated kid. no one noticed/cared what was going on and i get a little infuriated every time i think about it. i have so many emotions about his little sprig plushie and whenever he has to leave it behind in a fic i get emotional. he goes back to the wreckage of the castle post canon and finds his room in the rubble and sure some things are destrpyed but a few books and knickkacks are salvegable. he finds sprig a little torn up but sews him up and its ok.

he likes learning about Everything. like theres so many intersting things all the time he wants to read!! in the human realm he just devours books about everything. wikipedia rabbit hole. kinda guy who knows a random fact for almost any occasion. multitracker hunter but tbh he wouldnt really do much at hexside besides like. hes doing it for his friends. i think he would help dell out with the palistrom trees and also specialize in potions (since you dont need magic for that). he has private tutors in the coven im sure so hes probably educated very well.

hes got all kinds of fun grimwalker traits. hes mostly immune to boiling water. his eyes glow in the dark. sometimes when willow is using plant magic he can feel it under his fingnails and his hair. his hands have weird scarring and peeling and listen. listen. evryone was so dissapoited that hunter didnt have scars under his gloves but i was on the hype train for day One since HUnting Palismen bitch. i give him gloves all the time bc sensory issues + hide fucked up hands + mepahor for hiding yourself.

also is neurodivergent and trans. personanly perfer ftm but every variation is good. mtf hunter would be named bailey. his medications are like. wird mix of plant and witch medicine because grimwalker. has a terrible time in the human realm bc hes super unmedicated for a while but they find a human equivalent and hes fine now. kind of.

ok thats enough of that

[mjjune]

3, 5, 6, 11 for red/woodsman

14, 18, 24, 39, 40 for danny/helio

omg so many!!! i'll put this under the cut so it's not clogging up anyone's dash <3

SHIP ASK GAME HERE <3

Red/Woodsman

3. What was their first impression of each other?

Well, it's the prologue, where Red has been visiting her "grandma" in the woods, except this time she gets attacked by The Wolf. The Woodsman happened to be within earshot, and rescued her. So her first impression of him is heroic stranger, and his first impression of her is... small child? lmao

5. Do they argue often? If so, what do they argue about?

Not really!! They banter a little, but really they communicate quite well and even when it comes to things they don't agree on, they won't argue. I think the closest they get is when she's worried about his safety.

6. How do they make up/apologize after an argument?

Going back to the previous question, they don't really need to make up. I imagine it would be a lot of nonverbal communication, knowing looks, and silent admitting the argument was stupid and then acting like it never happened haha

11. How do they feel about nicknames/pet names? If they like them, what pet names do they use? If they hate them, why do they feel that way?

Yes!! Red is a nickname, actually. Since she is a princess, he's the only person who calls her that, and it signifies that he sees her as basically a real person, rather than authority/figurehead like everyone else does. And she calls him a nickname as well, but it's a regular nickname that's just a shortened version of his first name, which he likes.

Danny/Helio

14. Do they enjoy PDA, or are they more private with affection?

I think mostly they are private, but it depends on where they are. Helio isn't the type to make out on the street or in a random shop, but when they are at Danny's club they are extremely affectionate. They've even fucked in his office lol

18. How do they care for each other when one of them is wounded/sick?

They are extremely sweet :3 On the page (in book 1 anyway :eyes:) you only see Danny taking care of Helio, who's wounded. It's a lot of gentle touches and trying to give him whatever he needs.

24. How do their personalities affect their relationship? Do their characteristics compliment each other, or clash often?

So after the initial "we're enemies (but not really)" passes, they actually complement each other quite well! The way they view the world is actually very similar, and Danny sees a lot of his younger self in Helio. If they do clash, it's probably because Helio is being insecure about something, but tbh Danny is too patient for there to be any real arguments are anything - after that initial angsty hate-fuck period, ofc.

39. When and how did they admit that they loved each other? If they haven’t yet, why?

Lol the real question is: will they ever actually admit out loud?? RIP maybe never. But they have other ways of saying it, but that's too much spoilers >:3

40. Do they have any regrets in their relationship?

As far as book 1 is concerned, I think Danny regrets how much (literal) danger Helio ended up in because of their relationship, but I don't think he regrets actually being with him. Danny does actually fuck up once, and regrets that, but Helio is so traumatized (see: dying) by the point Danny realizes he fucked up that it's kinda null and void, like it's not even on Helio's radar and he wouldn't even consider it a fuck up? lmao Besides, Danny makes up for it tenfold soon after, so it's just one of those things that he carries. By the end of the book I'd say he's over it though.

Tagging a few friends & betas I think will like to see these answers :D @bebewrites @isabellebissonrouthier @jamieanovels @vsnotresponding

[milfhandholder]

Fuckit, here's a whole list of things that I think would appear on the show:

Despite being in different classes, William and Grell are academic rivals but only from Grell's perspective bcs she hates that man (affectionately) but William is just "wow Sutcliff is very smart"

Eric and Grell would skip classes and hide somewhere in the school, one time they got locked inside of a storage room bcs they're stupid and had to phone Alan to unlock it. Imagine the rest on your own

The rival school is basically the demons and Sebastian and Hannah are there.... and Claude with the triplets too I guess

Most juniors are in love with Grell but the faculty and her grade knows the truth

Everyone is so jealous of Ron for casually being friends with her but he knows how cringe she is

A spectrum from people who consume TikTok daily to "what the fuck is tictac": Ron (probably post videos there) -> Grell = Eric (will do TikTok dances but not post them) -> Alan (he looks at Instagram reels instead) -> William (what.)

Grell dislikes sport festivals because she hates sweating so she'd come up with the shittiest excuse to just stand there and look pretty

She will participate in the tug of war between classes though bcs Eric made fun of her "for pulling like a girl" and she's going to rip him into shreds for saying that

Undertaker is considered as a successful alumni (spoilers: he has gifted kid burnout)

Othello was very messy as a student but got along somewhat well with Undertaker. Not friends but friendly acquaintances, they lost touch in adulthood though

Othello met Grell when she came home after beating a bunch of people up during her first year and he talked to her like it's normal I guess. What matters now is that on Saturday night, they'll have dinner at a convenience store while they chat

Eric and Ron are popular kids (derogatory)

Grell is pretty popular herself but not really in her grade. She's pretty but she's so scary bro

Alan would be pretty well-known within the faculty because he can't overexert himself due to his condition. He hates that fact very much so he becomes very studious to make up for it

Alan's classmates ship him and Eric ngl. As they should

Mandatory beach ep!! Alan invited Eric but then he chickened out last second and invited Ron to accompany them. Ron then invited Grell who invited Othello who invited William (bcs he knows she likes him),,,Undertaker's there too and so are the demons

Grell, Eric, Ron vs Sebastian, Claude, Hannah in a volleyball match. Claude gets his head bonked with the ball LMAO

Concept for a spinoff series: the reapers in a high school setting. No questions asked, they're just a bunch of cool 'teens'

[dbzebra]

I’m curious on your take on Gohan and Videl 😀 lol I’m sure mine is not the widely accepted opinion of them.

I love Hanvi! It’s adorable :) I really enjoy how starts, Gohan is the soft country boi just trying to mind his own business + Videl is the fighter from the city and shes like 👀 to him from day one lol. The flight training are some of my favorite episodes in Buu saga (mostly due to Goten but still lol)

When she’s trying to unmask Saiyaman in the anime that’s also so much fun, I could watch a whole series on that tbh. I know it’s a lot less prominent in the manga as she instantly figures it out but another reason I prefer the anime most of the time.

Also love how Videl was the only one who knew Gohan was still alive deep down in Buu Saga. which also kinda didn’t make sense since they thought he died but after the wish brought back everyone killed, Gohan didn’t appear?? So that would mean he didn’t die. Anyway the squad is stupid (affectionate) lmao

To be honest I kinda just love the highschool sweethearts trope.

I hate what they did to Videl in Super. I personally don’t mind her staying home to take care of baby Pan that much, because she still was a baby, which is fine maternity leave is a thing. But they stripped her of her whole personality too. Except for that one episode where the actor tries to paint Gohan as a cheater and she’s like nah fuck off get out of my house. But beyond that she’s got that blank stare going.

At least the movie gave her a job which is cool, but not my preferred job for her. (I hc she’d be a cop or detective or something, basically getting paid to fight crime since she already helps the police anyway.)

I do like how sweet Gohan is with her too

The 3 Son family ships (gochi marten and hanvi) are all amazing imo

[maria-scribbles]

loyalty’s all i got | part two

three years ago, you had it all: great friends, good grades, and an almost perfect relationship with your boyfriend, jj. it all came crashing down when your mom relocated your family to california for work and you were forced to trade the outer banks for malibu, leaving your broken heart behind in the place you were just starting to think of as home. now you're back in town for college and to pick up the pieces, hoping to make things right again with your friends and the boy you never stopped loving.

word count: 8.6k+

ship: jj maybank x female!reader, pogue friendship

warnings n stuff: angst angst angst all around (with a happy ending tho!!), the reader being a v. sad girl, mentions of anxiety/depression, failed long distance relationship, drifting apart, self-inflicted loneliness/isolation, the classic trope of 'they broke up but they're still in love with each other' that gives me feels, swearing (it's not my writing unless someone says 'fuck' at least once), reconciliation/mended relationships, traditional cheesy rom-com rain scene 'cause i'm a Dramatic Hoe™

a/n: and here's the second and final part of this looooong two-shot! thank you all so much for reading and i hope you enjoy the finale even though i low key kind of hate it 🙃. fun fact: surfrider beach is a real place in malibu known for its great waves :) also i apologize for how long this took to post, i dropped my laptop and the screen broke so i had to wait for it to get fixed lmao. unbetaed as usual, any mistakes are my b. 

~masterlist~

part two: like a ghost that no one knew

When you said goodbye to your friends three years ago, you should've known things would never be the same again. You were sixteen, still so young and naïve and full of an almost childlike hope that kept you from seeing the obvious: life wasn't fair. Sometimes, you could be holding all the right cards and still lose the game.

It should've been easy. You had a video chat schedule already figured out, promises of daily texts and Snapchats, a boyfriend willing -enthusiastically willing, in fact- to go long distance and make it work no matter what 'cause you both agreed that what you had was something worth fighting for. You and your friends had weathered many storms together, what was one more? It could've been easy but you underestimated just how cruel California would be.

You traded one coast for the other and watched the sun set over the Pacific alone when you would've given anything to watch it rise over the Atlantic with your friends. It hurt to surf solo but you did it anyway, even though it felt like a damn sucker punch each time you caught yourself scanning the sand for JJ and his proud smile when you successfully caught bigger and bigger waves at Surfrider Beach. 

Long distance was hard. You had days where all you wanted to do was lay on your bed for hours, safely curled up in his arms as he ran his fingers through your hair but you had to settle for his voice over the phone and one of his shirts from your closet instead. You missed everything about him: his pretty eyes that looked like the clearest ocean, the cheeky grin he'd send your way after making a stupid joke that had you affectionately rolling your eyes in exasperation, that adorable flush that spread across his face without fail each and every time you said you loved him. You longed for his constant affection; the way he always wanted to keep you close somehow, his arm around your shoulders, hand in your back pocket, or fingers entwined with yours; how he could never go a day without kissing you. Being apart was nothing short of torture.

"I fucking miss you." He said late one night during a rare FaceTime session -his phone was a piece of shit so he had to 'borrow' John B's whenever he could- and you smiled despite the knife twisting itself deeper and deeper into your heart as you played with the fraying sleeve of his old sweatshirt you wore. 

"I fucking miss you more, J." You whispered back, giggling quietly when he scrunched up his nose in playful skepticism. 

"Yeah, I don't think so, babe. There's no way." 

"Yes, way!"

Although it hurt like hell, you imagined being tangled up with him in the hammock hanging in the Chateau's yard under the North Carolina sky -the light from the moon would turn his blond hair a pale silver as he grinned down at you and cupped your cheek in his hand, closing that final distance between you for a kiss that'd fuel the fire racing through your veins- and you let that fleeting happiness carry you through the night, long after you said goodbye. You fell asleep with your phone in your hand, unaware that your mother had been listening from the other side of your closed door.

You'd been distant from her and your dad in the months since the move, obviously going out of your way to avoid them both by spending all your spare time surfing at the beach, coming home well past sunset and heading straight to your room without a word. They'd taught you forgiveness wasn't something to be given willingly -it had to be earned- and since neither of them had done anything worthy to deserve an absolution, you simply pretended they didn't exist and let yourself stew in your justified anger.

Until the morning after your video date with JJ, they'd wisely given you your space so you were pretty blind sighted to find them both waiting for you at the dining room table, one of your dad's famous cinnamon rolls on a plate set in front of your usual chair. You paused in the middle of tying one of your boyfriend's worn bandanas in your hair before abruptly continuing toward the front door, acting like you didn't see the hopeful looks on their faces that made guilt slowly start to burrow its way into your chest. 

"Y/N, wait," Your dad sprung from his seat and reached his hand out toward your elbow, his face falling when you instantly pulled back and crossed your arms. "Please, let's just talk for a second."

"I'm gonna be late for the bus," You lied and tried for the door again, sighing in frustration when he blocked your path and ushered you toward the table where your mom was sitting, biting her thumbnail. The guilt burrowed deeper: you thought she kicked that habit years ago but there she was, chewing her nail to shreds and it was all because of you (the empty satisfaction you felt knowing you were the cause of her stress made you hate yourself just a little more.).

"Jellybean, don't worry about that. I'll drive you." 

You bristled at the old nickname but sat in the chair your dad pulled out for you anyway. The smell of the cinnamon roll he pushed your way made your mouth water but you refused to eat and kept your eyes down as you played with the stack of bracelets adorning your wrist. "You wanted to talk?" You asked, deciding to just rip the band-aid off all at once 'cause knowing your mom when she was anxious and your dad being allergic to any type of confrontation, you'd have sat there all day until one of them worked up the courage to speak.

"Talk, right." Bill said with a nervous chuckle, shaking his head as he took a seat and swiped his own cinnamon roll from the pan in the middle of the table. "Uh, how are you?"

"Are you serious right now?" You asked incredulously, looking up from your lap with a raised eyebrow. "All this for 'how are you?'" 

"How would we know?" Your mom finally spoke up as she pulled her ruined nail from her mouth, only to start instantly drumming her fingers on the table. "You're always holed up in your room or at the beach, Y/N. You never talk to us anymore."

You rolled your eyes before fixing her with a deadpan stare. "Hmm, I wonder why."

"Honey, you know I'm sorry-"

"Don't, okay? Just don't." You swallowed thickly and dumped the cinnamon roll back into the pan, blinking away the awful burning pressure building behind your eyes. "I can't listen to some half-assed apology that you don't mean!"

"Y/N, we are sorry. Everything's gonna get better, just give it time." Your dad's reply was muffled by a mouthful of pastry and any other time, you'd usually be laughing at his chipmunk cheeks but instead you just stared back down at your hands again, lip quivering as you tried and failed to hold yourself together. You would not cry. You would not cry. You would not-

"Please, honey." Your mom tentatively reached out one hand like she was approaching a wounded animal, her voice so soft you could barely hear it above the rush of blood in your ears. "It hurts us to see you like this-"

Oh, fuck this shit.

"You're hurt?! Are you kidding me?" Your chair scraped along the tile as you rocketed to your feet, vision blurring when the dam finally broke. "You promised we wouldn't move again until after I graduated and you broke that promise. I let myself make friends for once in my goddamn life -I fucking fell in love, Mom! I fell in love with the most amazing boy who, by some miracle loves me, too despite me being a...a complete loser!" You were rambling now but you couldn't find it in yourself to care about or stop the words flying from your mouth. 

"God, I was happy -so, so disgustingly happy it kind of scared me, okay?" You laughed bitterly and roughly wiped the tears from your cheeks, only to have more immediately take their place. "And you didn't even stop to think before you took it all away from me! So don't even talk to me about being hurt 'cause you have no fucking idea!"

Your dad was frozen, eyes the same color as your own blown impossibly wide in the middle of another bite of cinnamon roll while your mom, two tears streaking perfect twin tracks down her cheeks, looked at you like you'd just told her the world was ending -to her, it just might've been but to you, it already had. Neither of them said another word as you snatched your backpack off the couch and stormed from the house, slamming the door behind you.

Halfway to the bus stop, you decided school just wasn't in the cards that day and doubled back, hiding behind the shed in your backyard until your tears had run dry and both of your parents left -Rebekah to the hospital, Bill to wherever he went while you were in class- before heading inside to change into your rash vest and grab your board. Despite it being early Friday morning, Surfrider Beach was full of life and you welcomed the hustle and bustle as you turned off your phone and buried it at the bottom of your bag, leaving your problems behind on the sand. 

You spent the whole day at the beach, blissfully alone and free to do what you wanted, until the sun dipped low in the sky and you were too exhausted to even think about anything but dragging yourself home so you could pass the fuck out. You caught one final wave before heading back to shore, waving goodbye to the group of other kids you'd surfed with all day (the one thing you loved about California: everyone was so chill) and trudged through the sand toward your things where, just as you expected, your sister sat on your towel, clad in a baggy UCLA long-sleeve with her phone in hand. 

"Bitch, you killed it out there!" She looked up as you dropped your board to the ground and sat down heavily beside her, slipping an old Kildare County High School sweatshirt -the first one you ever 'borrowed' from your boyfriend, much to his delight- over your head. "I mean, look at you go!"

You leaned closer to watch the video she took, the barest hint of a smile on your face when you watched yourself perform a near perfect cutback on the screen. "That's 'cause I had the best teacher." 

Daisy tagged you and posted it to Instagram before you could protest, then tossed the phone back into her bag and turned to you with a forced cheerfulness that kind of made you want to smack her. "So..."

"Mom and Dad sent you to clean up their mess." You finished quietly, tucking your knees to your chest and wrapping your arms around them as your sister sighed dramatically and offered a sympathetic wince. 

"As always." She copied your position and you both stared out at the sun sinking over the water, its fading rays turning the sky brilliant shades of orange and pink. It was typical of your parents to send Daisy after you when you were upset -after all, you'd both been each other's only friend for over half your lives- and normally, you'd be glad to see your sister's friendly face instead of your mom's or dad's. That evening, though? All you felt was...disappointment.

"Guess they really don't give a shit about me." You mumbled under your breath, half-hoping Daisy didn't hear you but from the way she snapped her head in your direction, you didn't get your wish.

"Y/N, that's not it. They're just..."

"Just what? Pretending that they didn't stab me in the back? Acting like everything's all hunky-dory and they actually cared about my feelings?" 

You hastily wiped at your face when your sister silently looped an arm around your shoulders and tucked you against her side, her fingers running soothingly through the ends of your damp hair as you vented all of your frustrations -everything you'd kept locked deep inside your heart- until your voice was hoarse and the sun had long disappeared from the horizon and you had no tears left to cry.

"You have no idea what it's like, being so lonely it hurts to breathe. It hurts knowing Mom and Dad have each other and you have Daniel and I'm alone all the time." You lifted your head from her shoulder and rubbed your red eyes with your sleeve. "Worst part is, they just keep acting like I'll wake up one day and magically be okay and everything'll be all sunshine and rainbows again." 

"First off, I wanna say that I'm sorry for not making more time for you. I knew you were struggling and I'm a terrible big sister for not being here for you like I should have," You squeezed Daisy's other hand in thanks as she tucked a loose strand of hair behind your ear, her voice soft and steady like the waves crashing against the shore. "Second, I definitely don't think Mom and Dad are handling this the way they should, but I think they're trying in the only way they know how. That should count for something, right?"

You sighed and tugged the sleeves of your sweatshirt over your hands. "I guess, but they haven't even tried to see where I'm coming from and they don't get that I'm not the only one they hurt. If I have to hear one more half-assed apology, I'm gonna lose my shit. Again."

"I'm not saying you have to forgive them right away 'cause I sure as hell wouldn't until they say they're sorry and mean it. But..." She said, pulling you to your feet and shaking the sand from the towel you were sitting on, "you shouldn't keep shutting them out, okay? It's not healthy."

You tucked your board under your arm as Daisy grabbed your bag and swung it onto her shoulder before you both started walking toward the parking lot. "What if I'm never ready to forgive them?"

"That's a question I don't have the answer to." She said with a shrug. "You've gotta figure that one out for yourself."

So you followed your sister's advice. You were civil and gradually, your relationship with your parents improved until you could stand to be in the same room as them and even carry on a short conversation, even though you knew you'd probably never be able to fully trust them again. You caught them exchanging glances you could only describe as wounded when you often turned down their invitations to go to the movies or get ice cream or other things you used to love doing when you were younger but for the most part, they took it in stride and you were grateful for their little efforts. Forgiveness wasn't in the cards quite yet but with each passing day, you felt the icy wall around your heart slowly start to melt away.

But every time you thought you were taking one step forward, life pushed you two steps back. Just when you were getting things back on track with your family, the train went flying off the rails when it came to your friends and it was all your fault.

It wasn't like you didn't try -God, did you try- to keep yourself from falling back into old habits but Malibu just had a way of bringing out the absolute worst in you. Your old self, the girl who kept to herself and pushed everyone away, someone you thought you buried in the deepest grave, slowly came back from the dead with a vengeance little by little, so subtly you didn't realize what was happening until it was too late. 

One missed phone call turned into two, texts went unanswered for days or not at all, FaceTime sessions happened less and less. The last video chat had been with Kiara and it ended terribly, after you blew up at her for mending her friendship with Sarah Cameron in the near two years since you'd been gone, spitting words you couldn't quite remember -something along the lines of 'didn't take you too long to replace me, huh' and calling the blonde girl a 'heinous bitch'- but knew you regretted with everything you had and hanging up before she had a chance to explain. You couldn't even recall the last time you talked to Pope or John B aside from the occasional Snapchat and your daily calls with JJ had turned to once a week, if you were lucky.

He was trying, you could tell, and so were you but the deck was stacked against you and you were never very good at cards, anyway. It hurt to try, it hurt not to try, everything just hurt. Nearly two years apart had done their damage and coupled with your debilitating fear of being forgotten that clawed at your chest like a rabid dog, your relationship was on unstable ground and for the first time in almost four years, you were thinking about the end. It wasn't like you didn't love him anymore (holy shit, were you still completely head over heels in love). In fact, you loved him so much you realized that he could do so, so much better than you and the thought rested heavy and bittersweet on your mind, lurking in the shadows until you were ready to bring it to light.

It happened on New Year's Eve. Alone in your room, your hands shook as you answered JJ's call at midnight, his voice tired and a little hoarse from celebrating the new year three hours earlier on the opposite coast and you nearly started crying right then and there when you replied with a shaky "I think we need to talk."

"Babe, what's wrong?"

You took a deep breath and said quietly, "Everything."

"Talk to me." The pure concern in those three words nearly convinced you to call it off, to tell him to forget you said anything and that you were fine, everything was just fine but deep down, you knew you couldn't.

"I've been thinking about us and I...I just think that you deserve better than me. Someone who can actually be there for you when you need her and hold you when your dad's an asshole and see you every day. Someone who can laugh at your silly jokes and share a joint with you and clean you up when you get into fights defending your friends-"

"Babe, what are you talking about? That girl is you."

"Maybe I was but I'm not anymore and I don't think I have been since I left. I just can't be the girl you want, I can't be the girl you deserve, J -I'm a total fucking mess and you can do so, so much better than me."

"Y/N."

You didn't know you were crying until you heard the broken way he breathed your name and salt water dripped from your chin onto the bracelet around your wrist. 

"...are you breaking up with me?" His voice was impossibly small, the quietest you'd ever heard it and the exact moment your battered heart shattered into pieces was when you realized he didn't even put up a fight. 

"I think so." The words tore through you like a gunshot as you cried, curling into yourself on the bed in an effort to ward off the worst pain you'd ever felt in your life and you wondered if it was possible to die from a wound that wasn't even physical. 

He was quiet for a long time, so long you thought he hung up without you noticing through your tears, until he sniffed on the other end of the line.

"Guess we had a pretty good run, huh?" He asked with a watery chuckle and you found yourself giving a tiny, shuddering giggle in response -God, even when you were breaking his heart he still managed to make you laugh.

"The best, baby." The pet name slipped out like second nature and you winced, hastily trying to cover your mistake with an awkward cough but from the sharp breath you heard him take, he'd heard it anyway.

("I'm sorry," you said, and it stood as an apology for more than just your slip-up.)

"I love you, Y/N. Probably always will."

"I'll never stop loving you, JJ. That's a promise."

You let yourself believe him as you laid there bleeding from a gash you couldn't see, a wound you knew would never heal, and you hoped he let himself believe you, too, even when you ended the call without another word and threw your phone away from you, not bothering to see where it landed. The sound of your heavy, broken sobs filled the room and you didn't even mind when your mom, who you knew had been listening from the other side of your closed door like always, barged in and took you into her arms, stroking your hair as you cried into her lap.

If you were supposed to avoid getting hurt by leaving first, why did it feel like everything in you was broken? If you were making the right choice, why did it feel so wrong? You didn't have the answers and no matter how hard you searched, you knew you'd ever find them.  

So you tried to stay busy. You joined the surf club at school, got a part-time job at the local aquarium, did anything you could to distract yourself from the hurt and the guilt and the way getting out of bed every morning was the hardest thing to do. Surf club introduced you to Mackenzie, the one girl who was more ostracized at school -an even richer version of the kook academy you hated -than you, her for being freakishly tall and you for your East Coast attitude, and the two of you became fast, if reluctant friends. Mack didn't try to stitch the gaping hole in your heart caused by your absent friends but she numbed the pain just enough to make it bearable and you were grateful for her calm, steady presence at your side, even as you both tried to keep each other at arm's length.  

Later, you found out she was just like you, friendless and awkward with no self-esteem and a tendency to push people away, and that just cemented your friendship through the summer and your final year of high school.

Mack told you all about her life, growing up with no siblings, having height that she never learned to deal with, and a debilitating social anxiety that made making friends near impossible, and in turn you told her about how you hopped from town to town on your mother's whims, the wonderful friends you let slip away, and the beautiful boyfriend you loved enough to let go, and you both cried together for the lives you could've led.

"You two looked so happy," She said during the first sleepover you hosted as she held one of the many picture frames littering your dresser, her lips turned upwards in a small smile.

You gently took the frame from her hands and ran your fingers over the grinning face of your ex-boyfriend, his arms wrapped around your shoulders as your painted lips planted a deep red kiss on his cheek, and the wave of longing washing over you was almost strong enough to bring you to your knees. "It was the happiest I've ever been."

"Do you miss him?"

"So much it hurts."

i miss you.

i'm so sorry.

i still love you.

You'd typed and erased those texts every day but never mustered the courage to hit send and you couldn't decide if that was a blessing in disguise or the worst possible curse. Of course you still loved JJ: you promised you would and even if you didn't, you couldn't stop if you tried. He was your first love, the boy you so willingly gave your whole heart and then some; you still kept his ring on your thumb -the one he gave you at the airport the day you left- and his bracelet around your wrist, his bandanas in your hair and his face in your dreams and you knew you always would.

Before you could blink, your eighteenth birthday flew by and graduation was upon you.

You thought the second you were done with high school you'd be gone, heading straight back to the Outer Banks and the life you left behind but you found yourself stalling on sending in an application to UNC -Chapel Hill until you missed the deadline for the fall semester. On the outside, you made up a semi-legit excuse about getting your basic courses done at a community college to save money but deep down you really knew why you procrastinated: you were terrified to go back. Ever since your break up with JJ, you hadn't spoken to him or any of your old friends other than the obligatory birthday wishes on Facebook and you wondered if the damage you'd done over the years was too much to come back from, even as you tried to work up the courage to find out for sure.

Another year passed: in between earning college credits, you and Daisy took a sister's trip to Disneyland, Mack asked you to tag along on a jaunt up the coast to San Francisco to see Alcatraz, your parents celebrated their 25th wedding anniversary (your gift was long-overdue forgiveness and they said it was the greatest thing you possibly could've given them). When the time came, you and Mack both sent out your applications to UNC -you for biology, her for chemistry- and the myriad of emotions you felt when you got in was nothing short of dizzying. The old you was terrified, screaming at you to rip up the letter and join your sister at UCLA instead of opening old wounds but the hopeful you, the girl who lived without fear, the girl who fell in love and let herself be loved, screamed louder.

And so you killed the old you once again, burying her even deeper than the last time in a locked chest and throwing the key as far as you could out into the Pacific where you knew you'd never find it. You clutched your acceptance letter close to your chest and took a step east, away from California and toward the place where your broken heart still rested, scattered in pieces across the sand.

Settling in at UNC was surprisingly easy. You and Mack already clicked pretty well as friends so making the transition to roommates was natural and, dare you say it, even a little fun and the two of you quickly fell into a comfortable routine in your tiny apartment off campus in Chapel Hill. Comfortable and yet...that happiness you once felt all those years ago was missing from your life and you found yourself just as restless as you were in Malibu. While you knew exactly what you needed to do, that fear kept rearing its ugly head in the back of your mind, poisoning your thoughts: what if they wouldn't be happy to see you, what if they forgot about you, what if they hated you? What if he hated you?

It was terrifying, picturing yourself turning up at the Chateau with a hopeful smile only to have the door slammed right in your face. Deep down, you knew they'd never do that to you no matter how badly you'd hurt them but when you'd spent your whole life expecting the worst, taking a leap of faith wasn't an easy feat -something Mack just couldn't wrap her head around.

"I don't get it."

You glanced up from where you were lounging on your bed, flipping through your biology notes in preparation for your lab exam the next morning and shot your roommate a confused look. "Get what?”

Mack sat at your desk, her own notebooks lying ignored as she spun the chair around to face you, arms crossed. "Why you haven't hopped on that ferry to go get your man yet!"

You froze for a moment too long before offering a half-hearted shrug as you fiddled with the beads at the end of your bracelet. "It's not that easy. He probably wants nothing to do with me and I don't blame him."

"How do you know? You haven't talked to JJ in over a year, right?" At your tight nod, she continued, "What if he's just like you-"

"Depressed?"

Mack fixed you with a flat, unamused look. "Still in love, dumbass."

You scoffed and propped your chin in your hand as you glanced back down at your study guide, trying not to latch onto that little thought -hope and pain all rolled into one- that sparked to life at her words. He'd said he would probably always love you that New Year's Eve and back then you'd let yourself believe him but now, you weren't so sure. "Yeah, right. No way he's still...still in love with me after I broke his heart."

"Maybe he is, maybe he isn't," Your roommate said with a shrug, spinning around on the chair to grab her things. "You'll never know if you don't get over there, track his fine ass down, and talk to him."

You stared down at your notes without actually seeing anything, the slanted letters of your handwriting blurring before your eyes as the other girl flipped her chemistry book closed and stood, shooting you an warm smile that you didn't see. 

"Listen, Y/N, you're my best friend and I want to see you happy more than anything but I can't take that jump for you. Yeah, it's scary and nerve wracking and you might end up hurt worse than before, so what? That's just...life."

Mack left after that, crossing the apartment to her room so she could get ready for a date with a girl from her psych class, leaving you alone with tears on your face and a million thoughts in your head, all of them terrifying and exciting and oh so loud.

She was right, of course -Mack always knew the right thing to say- and as you stared down at the bracelets on your wrists and the ring on your thumb, the pictures on your phone and the too-big shirt hanging off one shoulder, you realized sitting around moping wasn't gonna solve anything; if you wanted your happiness, your friends, the love of your life back, you needed to step up and fight for them with everything you had. And so you wiped the tears from your cheeks and walked to the cliff's edge with your head held high, ready for the fall and whatever came with it. You were ready to fix your mistakes, no matter how badly it might hurt.

Still, you couldn't do it all on your own. You needed some help to make things right again and while you knew just who to ask, you weren't quite sure if they'd be willing to lend a hand. Desperate times called for desperate measures though and you penned a good old-fashioned letter, feeling like a heroine in a Jane Austen novel as you poured all your thoughts -your dreams, wishes, hopes- onto a piece of paper in bold blue ink and sent it off to its destination on Figure 8, your Hail Mary for a happy ending sealed up neatly in a single envelope.

Mack, bless her heart, did her best to keep your spirits up as you waited on a response but even her ever reassuring presence couldn't keep you from worrying as one week passed by, then two. Halfway through the third you'd almost given up, already wracking your brain for another way to make your plan work when your phone chimed with a text from an unknown number.

i'll help you

And just like that, the moment you'd been waiting for was finally within your reach; you told your parents not to expect you for Thanksgiving break, called your sister for a much needed pep talk, and started counting down the days until you'd see your friends again, for better or worse.

When you left the Outer Banks three years ago, it was sunny. You were sixteen, young and in love and scared about the future.

When you returned, it was in the middle of a storm. You were nineteen, a little bit older but no less in love and definitely still scared about what was waiting for you at the end of the road.

Rain pounded against the roof of Sarah Cameron's SUV as she drove away from the docks and toward the Chateau, her fingers tapping along to the music playing quietly through the radio. You sat in the passenger seat, soaked to the bone from your ferry ride from the mainland and shaking like a leaf despite the towel wrapped around your shoulders and the warm air flowing from the car's vents.

"Thanks for coming to get me," You said, wincing at the awkward lilt of your voice echoing in the small space as you spun JJ's ring around your thumb and stared out the windshield at the familiar sights streaking by in blurred shades of green and brown. Being back opened a Pandora's box of emotions in your head, both good and bad, and instead of trying to sort them out, you let them bounce around in your brain like a pinball machine and concentrated on methodically twirling the warm metal ring in circles on your finger.

Sarah briefly glanced away from the road to shoot you a small smile, her kind eyes softening at your visible nervousness. "Not gonna lie, I was pretty sure you hated me so when I got your letter it kinda...threw me for a loop. Sorry it took me so long to reply."

You wished the heated leather seat would swallow you whole as you winced again and wrapped the towel tighter around your shoulders. "For the longest time, I thought I did hate you but I realized I was just...scared of losing my friends and I took it out on you. You didn't deserve to be labeled the villain in my story when I was the one, um, sabotaging myself, I guess." You took a deep breath and picked at a loose thread tickling your arm. "And I'm really, really grateful for your help."

It was more than you wanted to admit out loud -nearly the same words were written in the letter peeking out from the center console of the car- but at the same time, you knew it was what needed to be said and from the way the blonde girl's fingers stopped tapping against the steering wheel, she knew she needed to hear it. At a red light, she quickly tapped out a text on her phone before tossing in back into her bag with another tiny grin in your direction.

"Happy to help. For what it's worth, I'm so sorry if I made you feel like you were being replaced, I never intended to hurt you or steal your friends or...or, I don't know, usurp-" 

"Sarah, stop. Please," You held up a hand to cut off her apology and offered her a self-deprecating smile. "I'm the one who's sorry. I let my...jealousy get the best of me and I feel so bad about all the shit I said 'cause that wasn't fair to you at all and I hope you can forgive me-"

"Y/N, there's nothing to forgive! We all say stupid shit when we're mad -trust me, I know." She interrupted with a bubbly, contagious giggle that seemed to scare away the gloomy storm clouds gathered over your head for a moment in time. "But I was never pissed at you, ever. I just want you to know that."

Stunned, you settled deeper into the seat and started playing with your ring again as she kept driving on, unbothered by your lack of response. You felt like you were thirteen again, back when Sarah and Kiara were your only friends, before the birthday disaster and the whole pogue versus kook feud that got completely out of hand; it felt...nice and you found yourself hoping that the blonde girl would still want to be your friend again, no matter what the others thought about your sudden return. 

"Thank you."

Sarah gave no indication she heard your quiet confession of gratitude but from the way you watched her smile grow out of the corner of your eye, you knew she did. The rest of the drive passed in companionable silence as you retreated into your own thoughts, your nerves getting worse and worse the closer you got to your destination.

You took a deep breath and let it out slowly through your nose, feeling like your heart was trying to beat its way through your rib cage. You hadn't been this anxious in a long, long time, so long you almost forgot how much you hated the tightness in your chest, how your palms would start to sweat, the way you'd chew the inside of your cheek until you tasted blood on your tongue. By the time Sarah pulled into an open spot beside the achingly familiar Volkswagen parked in front of the Chateau, you were surprised you were still able to breathe.

The sight of the tiny house, one you spent so many carefree days and beautiful nights in alongside your friends, standing virtually unchanged in front of you was like a shot to the heart and your hands, curled into fists on your lap, began to shake without warning. Shit, you were a godforsaken mess; how the hell were you supposed to do this without having a mental breakdown?

"I'm so scared."

The whispered words, barely audible over the torrential rain against the roof, slipped from your mouth before you could stop them and Sarah slowly reached one hand over to give your trembling wrist a reassuring squeeze, the corners of her mouth curled upward in a slight smile.

"Don't be. They're gonna be so happy to see you!"

You turned to look at her, eyebrows knit together in disbelief. "How are you so sure they still care about me?"

"I'm sure 'cause I've seen it. My God, if only you could've heard all the times they talked about you -'I wish Y/N was here,' 'remember that time with Y/N,' hell, just straight 'I miss Y/N so fucking much,'" She said bluntly and shifted in the driver's seat to face you head on, smiling wider at the thunderstruck look on your face. "Pretty sure I haven't gone a week without JJ saying that last one at least once." 

"I thought..." You paused, tongue darting out to run over your dry lips as you tried to put your jumbled feelings into words, "I thought he'd hate me -I mean, after all I've done, you think he still..."

"Loves you? Are you kidding?" Her reply was so enthusiastic it was hard not to believe her as she went on, her words like sunshine brightening the darkest corners of your mind. "He's still head over heels, I've never seen him even look at another girl in three damn years. You know he still wears your necklace, the one with the silver star? Kie told me all about it."

"I-I didn't." You remembered giving it to him the day you left, managing a shaky smile through your tears as you carefully clasped it around his neck, your fingers running over his skin as you settled the charm perfectly alongside that little shark tooth you'd grown to love.

('Be careful with this, baby. It's my favorite.' You had said, crying harder when he'd taken off one of his rings and slipped it onto your thumb.

'Well, this one's my favorite so take good care of it, okay?' His voice had been light but his eyes were heavy with unspoken words that you'd heard loud and clear because you knew your gaze said the exact same things.

don't let me go

don't break my heart

don't stop loving me)

You coughed to disguise the fat tears that started rolling down your face, quickly wiping them away with your sleeve but the blonde girl wasn't fooled as she gave your hand another friendly squeeze.

"Come on, they're probably wondering what's taking me so long," She sent a conspiratorial wink your way and grabbed her bag from the center console. "I told them I was picking up some pizzas but I have a funny feeling they won't be too pissed that I lied."

With a desperate grip on the strap of your backpack and your heart racing, you trailed behind Sarah through the rain to the front porch. 

"Ready?" She glanced back where you lingered at the top of the stairs, anxiously shuffling from foot to foot, and shot you a smile that did little to calm your nerves. "Just wait here!"

She knocked on the door before you could reply and yelled loud enough to be heard over the pouring rain, "Hey, it's me! Can somebody get the door? My hands are kinda full."

"Got it!"

Your bag slipped from your fingers and fell onto the porch with a loud thump at the sound of the voice floating through the open windows, a voice you heard nearly every night as you slept, in your dreams of a future you wanted with everything you had. You knew it better than your knew your own, knew every pitch and tone and lilt; quiet and raspy in the mornings when you woke up in each other's arms, loud and carefree during long days spent under the golden sun with the rest of your friends, soft and warm and laid bare at night when he showed how much he loved you with more than just words.

Sarah gave you an enthusiastic thumbs up before stepping to the side just as the door opened and you suddenly found yourself struggling to breathe as you stared into the wide blue eyes of your ex-boyfriend. JJ stared right back, one of the hands you used to hold clenched so tight around the doorknob his knuckles were white, the lips you used to kiss parted in surprise, the blond hair you used to run your fingers through falling onto his forehead like always and the familiar, beautiful sight of him standing close enough to touch made your knees weak.

"You're not pizza."

It was such a JJ thing to say and you didn't know whether to laugh or cry as you swallowed thickly and shook your head. "Sorry to disappoint you."

"I'm not."

"Oh."

Hope flared white hot in your chest at his words but it quickly started to fade, replaced by fear when he made no move toward you, his fingers still gripping tight to the door, and you felt your face start to heat in embarrassment as Sarah looked back and forth between the two of you like she was watching a tennis match. 

God, you were so stupid. What did you expect would happen, showing up out of the blue after over a year of no contact? Everything would fall into place again with just one long, heavy look? Believing it could be that easy turned you into a complete and total fool, tongue-tied and insecure and weak.

"Yo, what's the hold up?" John B's voice asked from inside the house and Sarah leaned down to call through the open window, "Come out here and find out!"

A wave of dizziness hit you like a truck and you took a sudden step back toward the stairs, arms wrapping around your stomach as it twisted itself into knots. "I'm sorry, I-I shouldn't have come. This was a mistake." You didn't notice the stricken look that crossed JJ's face or the three familiar, stunned expressions that appeared behind him in the darkened doorway before turning away and stumbling off the porch toward the road, leaving your bag behind and you definitely didn't notice how you barely made it off the bottom stair before a set of footsteps hastily gave chase. 

"It wasn't a mistake, Y/N!" JJ's desperate voice stopped you in your tracks, halfway across the yard with more than just rain running down your face. "Not to me, never to me."

His soft touch on your wrist sent shockwaves through your body and you instantly became putty in his hands, letting him turn you around without a fight to face him, watching in fascination as the downpour started to darken his gray shirt and flatten his hair against his forehead. Three years hadn't changed much about him -he was a little taller, hair a little longer, the muscles in his arms a little more defined- and when you met his wide-eyed gaze, beads of rain dripping from his long eyelashes like diamonds, you wondered if he was thinking about the differences time created between the younger you of the past and the you of the right now, too.

"Oh." You repeated dumbly, struggling for something, anything to say that didn't make you sound like an illiterate fool. Even at nineteen, words still weren't your strong suit so you let your actions speak for you as your hand reached out on its own accord to caress the silver star still clasped around his neck, the thumb still wearing his ring brushing slowly against the dip between his collarbones; he shivered, and you weren't really sure if it was from your touch or the cold. 

"Y/N." JJ said your name like a prayer, like he couldn't believe you were there in front of him, and you inhaled sharply when both of his hands slowly, carefully moved to cup your face, his calloused thumbs habitually wiping the tears from your cheeks over and over, even as more instantly replaced the ones he swept away. "I fucking missed you."

You stood there, looking like a damned drowned rat with your hair dripping into your eyes, shivering in your soaked jeans and Kildare County High School sweatshirt, the love of your life cradling your face so gently in his hands, and so many things you wanted to say flooding your brain but only the one that mattered the most managed to get by your trembling lips.  

"I'm still in love with you." 

You noticed a lot when you put your heart on the line: the steady, soothing sound of water falling through the trees, the bright, clean taste of rain on your tongue, how the sun was just barely starting to peek out from behind the stormy clouds, but they all paled in comparison to the little things you noticed about the boy in front of you; blue irises made even brighter by the red rimming his eyes, how he stepped closer on the wet grass until the tips of his scuffed boots touched your worn gray high tops, the way his hands trembled ever so slightly against your flushed face. 

"Well, it's your lucky day 'cause I'm still in love with you, too."

All of the breath left your lungs in one big rush when JJ smiled hopefully -oh, how you loved everything about that smile: his slightly crooked teeth, that dimple in his cheek, the endearing pink blush swept across his nose- and you felt yourself return it without a second thought, your own hope once again burning bright in your chest.

"Even after...everything?" Your voice shook like the fingers you slid into the hair at his nape and he leaned down to rest his forehead against yours, close enough you could feel his breath on your lips when he spoke.

"I told you I'd always love you, didn't I?"

You nodded, a delicious shiver running down your spine when he tilted his head just so and gently bumped your nose with his. You remembered all the times he did that through the years, a dizzying slideshow of memories that flashed through your mind like lightning, and your fingers wove themselves deeper in his hair. 

"I have so many things to apologize for," You said with a tiny, quiet shake of your head, tearing your eyes away from his in shame and staring over his shoulder toward where the rest of your friends watched from the porch, all crowded together at the top of the stairs with identical enthralled expressions on their faces. "There are so many mistakes I've made and people I've hurt and I have no idea how to even start saying sorry for it all." 

"Babe."

The sound of your old pet name caused your gaze to snap right back to his and your heart felt like it was about to beat right out of your chest when one of his hands trailed down the sensitive skin of your neck and then lower until it traced along the curve of your hip and left a line of fire in its wake.

"We'll figure that out later, okay?" JJ said as his fingers tucked a loose strand of wet hair behind your ear, a coy, ardent grin on his face. "'Cause I've been waiting three years to kiss you again and if I don't get to do it soon, I'm gonna lose my fucking mind."

You smiled -a wide, joyful, elated smile- and rose up on your tiptoes in anticipation. "Then kiss me." 

You didn't have to tell him twice. His lips pressed against yours desperately, like he needed you to breathe, like you were the very air in his lungs, religiously, like your mouth was the altar and he was there to worship as he pulled you close, the fingers of one hand tangling in your hair while the others dug into your hip. You kissed him back just as hard and the familiar taste of him on your tongue -mint, smoke, salt- sent that dearly missed spark racing through your veins like wildfire.

It was a little cliché, having your long-awaited reunion kiss in the rain but it was honest and candid and real and so much better than anything you could've dreamed. You lost yourself in his touch like you used to, clinging to him like a lifeline and pouring your whole heart into every fierce brush of your lips against his, both of you pulling away for a moment only to dive right back in each time. It was addictive, intoxicating, and you could've spent the rest of your life standing there in the middle of the yard and kissing like there was no tomorrow if a loud, ear-piercing wolf whistle hadn't come from the direction of the porch.

The two of you broke apart just barely, with foreheads still pressed together and swollen lips, and you couldn't stop yourself from giggling when JJ blindly flipped the bird over his shoulder before pulling you back in for another eager kiss that filled your whole body with an exhilarating, heavenly heat that never faded, even after four enthusiastic voices suddenly surrounded you like an excited swarm of nosy, buzzing bees.

"You aren't the only one who missed her, J." Kiara said, smiling widely as you reached out to grab her hand and pull her into a powerful one-armed hug, her chin resting on your shoulder.

"Yeah, stop hogging all the love!" John B added, throwing himself into the pile along with Pope, who slung an arm around your shoulders as he said, "Great to have you back, Y/N."

Sarah was the last to join and she quietly tucked herself under John B's arm with a pleased grin on her face, nodding when you mouthed 'thank you' in her direction. The six of you stood there in the rain, smiling like fools, and as the sun started to scare away the dark clouds overhead and in your heart, a weight you didn't even realize had been crushing your chest slowly began to lift away with each freeing breath. 

You still had a lot of work to do: wrongs to be righted, apologies to be made, explanations -not excuses- to be given for every shitty thing you did in your past. But as happy tears started streaming down your face once again and you felt the arms of the friends you’d thought were lost to you forever tighten around you at the sight, you knew in your bones all would be forgiven. You knew that after three long years, you'd finally come home.

-

let me know what you think! i read each and every one of your comments and cry because they mean so much to me! ❤

taglist ❤: @sinkbeneathwaves​ @cordeliascrown​ @maysbanks​ @jjpogueprincess​ @bibliophilewednesday​ @k-n-e​ @jiaraendgame​ @alexa-playafricabytoto​ @heypearce​ @sexualparkour​ (send me an ask if you’d like to be added or removed!)

[sukirichi]

tag games!

@caizen, thank you so much for the tag bb, and I’m so glad you’re simping for jin too HAHAHAHAHA he is sooo perfect fufu!

her questions: not a question but, describe what your ideal life would be with your selfship/s and what your actual life would be with your selfship/s. optional: why is that your ideal/actual life with them? kind of like an expectation vs reality.

hmm my ideal life with my self ships *looks warily at naoya* and what my actual life would be with my self ships. alright, let’s do this!

NAOYA ZENIN

-          straight up, I ship myself with him. Yes, I know he’s awful, yes I know he’s sexist, but I’m 100% confident I can make him fall for me with just my personality alone. I mean, I’m pretty too but LMAO. Honestly, my ideal life with Naoya is not really a domestic one. I don’t know how to cook very well, I don’t deal well with children either, I don’t know how to do my laundry so…I can’t imagine myself being a housewife for him. I am capable of other things too, and my ideal life with Naoya is the two of us just being successful and contented in both our careers. This is going to sound weird, but I can always picture myself coming home late from work, taking my coat off and replacing my scrubs (if I don’t have my own clinic) with pajamas, and Naoya comes home a few minutes later, looking FINE and dashing in his suit. We’re both tired but satisfied, doing skincare side by side and we have our own sinks just because we like our space, brush our teeth together and then cuddle to bed. Complain when the alarm rings at 4am but we’ll get up anyway and it’s just a very nice routine of stability <3

-          My ACTUAL life with him though…if we’re going canon-wise, I think Naoya won’t be openly affectionate. I’ve got a feeling he won’t let me work too and just serve him instead. Now don’t hate me for this, I’m indulging myself in my fantasy, but I think I’ll be fine learning how to make him tea and basically be, as my header says, his trophy wife. We’re not the most romantic, we’re definitely not spoiling each other, but I think we’d be a great power couple

-          why is that my ideal/actual life with them? kind of like an expectation vs reality. That’s my ideal life with him because if Naoya wasn’t sexist, I feel like he’d be supportive with my career and studies too. I’m okay that he’s not overly affectionate, and I feel like Naoya isn’t big on overly romantic stuff either, so I’m really satisfied with just mundane things. And that’s my actual life with him because BRUH man is too busy trying to be head of the clan to even pay that much attention to me but like…I don’t mind LMFAO

 RYOUMEN SUKUNA

-          hear me out, wait!!! my ideal life with sukuna is I want to be a grand Queen beside him. Sukuna…I have a feeling he’s quite gentle and affectionate to his lover, so I know we won’t be toxic like Harley Quinn and Joker (that’s more Naoya’s scene LOL) but yes, I want us to just be happy somewhere in a temple. Maybe he does the hunting and I do the cooking, insert gratuitous forest sex with the moonlight shining on us and sometimes sitting on his lap because he’s the King of Curses and his lap is my throne <3 Yeah, I want Sukuna to be my daddy. I don’t have a daddy kink, but for Sukuna I will

-          the actual life with Sukuna…honestly I don’t think he’ll even let me get near him much. we’ll have a forbidden relationship and he’ll try to keep pushing me away because he doesn’t want to hurt me but I’m gonna be stupid and run to him anyway, and he just sighs and goes “fine…” and you know, I’m practically untouchable since I’m his precious little human <3 CAN ANYONE TELL IM INTO ALPHA MALES

 AKAASHI KEIJI

-          Let’s go Haikyuu brainrot wee woo! OKAY DUDE, THE ACTUAL AND IDEAL LIFE WITH AKAASHI IS THE SAME, MAN IS SO IDEAL HIMSELF LIKE HELLO? hes amazing, hes perfect, hes wonderful hes a gentleman? My ideal and actual life with him is anything we want it to be <3 yeah that’s it, things are simple with Akaashi man. it’s all about loving each other and it’s so gentle and nice and easily flowing like waterrr aaaahh I love him spspspss

that was fun LMAO but its also sad cuz I’m reminded again they don’t exist *cries in the corner* tagging besties @noritoshiikamo @fushigurocockslut @nakachuchu @sunatunaroll @strawberryakaashi @7tsumurai @goddessofchaosleo @daikon-dishes @gojos-mochi @aprosperlys @mod-officialsukuna you don’t have to do this if you don’t want to!

my questions for you guys is: 

in your self ships, what trait of yours would they like best and dislike the most and why?

how do you think your self ships would react to you confessing for the first time?

[agape-28]

I wanna hear about how you went from an anti to a larrie (and why you were an anti in the first place)

Buckle up, bestie!! I've already made a post of my origin here, but I don't mind saying it again!!!

I was an anti because I was a part of the general public (I was never a directioner, I probably can't even sing like more than five 1D songs), but since I was ingrained in fandom culture, I've always heard about how "Larries destroyed their friendship". I'm a very volatile, reactionary person; like sometimes I just go search up negative things to fight people LOL. I also had an underlying sense of internalized homophobia, and was very much in my "omg not everything is gay" phase. Additionally, I used to love K-Pop, and I always remember hearing fans say "Just don't act like a Larrie" (aka "make your faves uncomfortable by shipping them" or "actually believe that their relationship is real"). Really, RPF shippers have become synonymous with Larries.

When looking up lyrics and chords for Sweet Creature, I saw how so many Larries existed. And I was like "WTF? Why are there so many of you?" And then I sort of thought, well, if there are so many of you, what could be the reason? So I found myself looking up "harry"/"louis"/"harry louis" on Twitter, and was baffled by the amount of people who tweeted about them were Larries. I also searched up "larry stylinson" on Tiktok.

But it took me a long time to actually believe in Larry, you know? I think it's because, like I said, I was a K-Pop fan. Ships weren't new to me. A lot of idols say “I love you” or other flirty things to one another, so that fans could go wild over them. This is called "fanservice". So I actually thought that they were "Larrybaiting" (I know, I know). I also started looking up Larry on Tumblr, and I fell into a "Twarrie" phase (maybe they were together?). But I still had this sense of doubt because of my dislike for Harry (sorry!), because of how strong and potent his womanizer image was.

I think I accepted its realness around the time AFHF happened. This isn't what totally pushed me to believe it (like I didn't watch this and think YEAH LARRY IS REAL), but I remember watching Louis' GQ video where he discusses his tattoos, and he just... doesn't?? And I was like "Well that's stupid, why participate in this vid if you won't answer?"

Also, people saying like "that's just them being platonically affectionate"... IDK, I'm super platonically affectionate with my friends and we're all fucking gay, but I don't think I ever look at them like how Harry and Louis look at each other. (Shout-out to the X-Factor GIF where Louis was blindfolded and leaned in for a kiss and Harry genuinely looked like he was gonna go for it.)

I also got rid of my "Larrybaiting" thoughts by realizing that One Direction is like... old. LMAO not old in that way, but I was looking at it from a “modern” perspective, which was clouded by how I viewed K-Pop groups. I also thought that "Hmm, isn't it counterintuitive to Larrybait but also insist Larries ruined them?" As much as it sucks, if they weren't real, I think they would be much more bait-y, you know? Like, management would have no reason to be so scared, because they wouldn't be real. And if they truly hated each other, management wouldn't act like that. It's in everyone's best interest to act like they like one another.

in reference to this

[daisukefmd]

hey guys, it’s oli here, late as ever. sorry to be so tardy to the party, but work’s been kicking my ass for the past week ;-; but fortunately i have today and tomorrow off, so i’ll be around to plot and get some threads going! below the cut, you’ll find his background info, how he came to be an idol, present day stuff and everything in between. if you’re interested in plotting, just drop a like and i’ll shoot you a dm!

BACKGROUND

he’s the youngest of five children and he was born in kobe, japan. he’s always been a little bit on the more quieter side of things. his preschool teachers used to try to tell his parents that he was antisocial and wouldn’t interact with the other kids, but the truth was just that he was quiet and shy. his whole family is quiet and shy too, something his teachers found out when his parents came in for their meeting about daisuke. he was definitely a wall flower while he was growing up, which was pretty difficult to believe given the fact that he was always the tallest person in his class ever since he was a little kid. despite his height, he always managed to fade into the background.

he continued to fade into the background until he was about thirteen years old and he was scouted by a label in japan for his height and visuals. he was thrust into training, where they discovered that he had a pretty decent singing voice and they decided to make him the main vocal of that group. it was supposed to be an idol super group (think akb48 but with a bunch of guys instead). unfortunately the company lost more money than they gained and they ended up shutting down and his group disbanded before he could gain any real recognition with the public.

he had only been out of the group for a week before bc found him and asked his parents if they could take him to south korea to be in an idol group they were debuting. it didn’t take much to convince his parents, and a month later he was being shipped off to south korea. he arrived at the end of the summer in 2014 and officially joined bc entertainment as a trainee. 

being a foreigner made forming connections and bonds with others difficult for him as well. it didn’t help that he was socially awkward and tended to stick to himself when he wasn’t training or sitting through lessons. his first year and a half as a trainee was spent more or less on his own, which took a huge toll on his mental health at the time. he was lonely, but he had never really learned how to reach out and form friendships with one another. it didn’t help that he was so far away from his family, whom he had never spent more than a few days from at a time.

the year and a half mark brought along not only stronger korean language skills, but a certain comfortability being in south korea. he had grown used to it by then, and while he would have preferred to be home with his family, he had figured out a way to cope by just burying his negative feelings deep down until he didn’t really acknowledge them anymore. not the healthiest way to cope, but it was all he could do at the time. fortunately, on the brighter side of things, he had formed a handful of friendships that made being away from his family a little easier for him.

he had began to grow a little weary that his debut would never come because he had been a trainee for over two years, but then bc told him that he’d be participating in cloud6. usually, daisuke isn’t a competitive person, but he couldn’t lie and say that he didn’t give his all on the show. he knew that his personality fell flat, so he worked hard to make sure that his talent more than made up for his more subtle and underwhelming persona.

while he was praised by many for his hard work ethic and strong voice, he was attacked by just as many for being boring, some hateful comments even taking shots at his cultural background. while that was something he had been expecting, he wasn’t stupid enough to believe that everyone would be accepting of a foreigner, it did hit him very hard. he just wanted to sing and there he was, being attacked for something that he couldn’t even change.

despite all of that, he ended up ranking in third place on cloud6 and ended up debuting in cloud. he was happy to make it to the end, but he was also a little hesitant in his happiness because he was met with such criticism when his ranking was announced. people accused the show of rigging and giving daisuke his spot, and it made him question his own ranking for quite some time.  was his spot given to him? did he really earn it? those were thoughts that ran through his mind consistently, and still do whenever he’s in a particularly bad place mentally.

cloud’s success was a source of happiness for daisuke for a while - still is, however not as much. he was glad that they were being well received, but as the years dragged along, he couldn’t help but crave more. he wanted to start dipping his toes into other aspects of the entertainment industry, mainly creating his own music. he had learned a lot from the industry, and he wanted to step out of the realm that cloud had created for him and try out something new. he was given the opportunity to do so with his debut album and solo releases so far. however his next album will be completely his sound, different from anything cloud’s released before, and he’s excited that bc’s letting him experiment a bit more. 

DAISUKE’S OFFICIAL IMAGE 

while cloud’s overall image might be bright and refreshing, daisuke’s personality and persona don’t really fit into that category. on stage, he’s more than capable of putting out that vibe during performances, however once he steps foot off stage, he’s retreating back into his real self - quiet and reserved. despite bc trying consistently to bring him out of his shell during his trainee years and the first few months of cloud’s career, they eventually found an image that could work for him. daisuke’s job in cloud is to be the buffer. he’s the calm, cool and collected one. the mediator. he’s literally and figuratively the middle child of cloud. he balances the group out really well, adding a personality that’s the opposite of his group members’.

he’s marketed as mature, intelligent and hard working. the voice of reason in the group. respectful, the kind of guy your parents would trust their daughter with. a lot of cloud’s fans have even called him “regal” because of how he carries himself and speaks. the general public sees him as a strong vocalist, one of the better ones of the current k-pop generation, but they don’t know much about him aside from that. most of the time he makes headlines is because of his singing, and bc likes to keep it that way. there’s a slight air of mystery around him that makes him interesting enough to pay attention to. bc does have a habit of using that to their advantage whenever they can, and so far it has worked for daisuke. a lot of people are, surprisingly, drawn to his quiet demeanor and hard working attitude.

OTHER INFO

some people are a little intimidated by him because he’s not really smiley and he’s super tall (he’s about 6′5″) but he’s really not a bad guy. he’s just really quiet and shy, but if you can make your way through his shell, you’ll have a great friend. he loves his group members, although it may not seem like it because he’s not really affectionate, but he’s happy with them.

most people are shocked whenever he sings because his speaking voice is so deep and then he sings and that voice comes out of him lmao not to mention his physical appearance contradicts his singing

he knows that his stage name is ‘dai’ because it’s probably to make it easier for koreans to pronounce, but he hates it lmao he hates nicknames and pet names and anything of the like.

while he’s still a quiet guy that prefers to keep to himself, he’s not as much of a pushover as he used to be. he has a voice for himself, and he speaks up for himself when he needs to. 

[faetarou]

tag game.

tagged by. @melsun-primary ty mel <33

tagging. @sunkeiji , @kairakeiji , @koukisses , no pressure, and anyone else who wants to !!

rules: answer the questions about you and your favourite self-ship !!

i'm doing faetarou !! this is reminding me to finish my self-ship posts-

01. who offers their jacket when the other is cold? i don't get cold, like, ever, so i'd give rin my really big oversized jackets and hoodies when he's complaining about it being cold and then we laugh because he looks weird in smaller clothes

02. who giggles uncontrollably when the other playfully picks them up? this one is definitely me, i have a super loud laugh and i'm also short, so rin just goes ^^^

03. who compliments the other in front of everyone? probably both of us, i love embarrassing him >:)

04. who is more likely to tell a pun and what is the other's reaction to the pun? it would probably be me making a really bad academic pun and rin calling me a nerd, but i'm his nerd so <3

05. when one of them has a bad day, what does the other do to help cheer them up? when rin has a bad day, i make him food and i let him lie on my lap and complain to me, running my fingers through his hair. when i have a bad day, rin cuddles me and puts on my favourite music to cheer me up, even if he doesn't like the songs.

06. if they got to pick what one another wears for a day, what would one another wear? i would make rin wear a skirt not gonna lie because i think he would look amazing in a black skirt with a belt, a longsleeve black shirt under a pink t-shirt, and also pink high tops. the thing is, though i was trying to make fun of him, he would pull it off perfectly i think he would probably make me wear something really stupid, like a dirndl BYE ACTUALLY HE WOULD and then i would throw a knife at his head -_- [for those who don't know, a dirndl is a cultural german dress lmao]

07. who introduces their partner to their family first? how does it go? we met because i was tutoring his younger sister, so his family thinks i'm really smart and they like me without knowing that i'm an absolute menace

08. in a coffee shop AU, who would be the coffee shop employee and who would be the customer? i would be the employee, i think, except i hate coffee and i'm working there because it's my family friends' place, so i keep trying to convince him to stop coming in and ordering ten shots of espresso in the one cup and he keeps trying to convince mee that coffee is 'amazing'

09. when they sit side by side, do they touch one another? for example, does one person has their arm around the other, do they sit holding hands, or linked arms, etc. physical touch is my love language, so we are at the very least holding hands, but i think we would sit most often with rin's arm around me on my waist and my head on his shoulder

10. what is a small thing that one another does to make their partner happy? rin listens to me, no matter what stupid rant i'm going on, and he watches me with a pretty smile on my face even when i won't shut up. i give rin whatever affection he wants without question, whether its little kisses or cuddles lying down, to show him i love him.

11. what would they do to celebrate their one year anniversary? i'm someone who loves organising things, so i think i would arrange us having a day out like walking through parks and window shopping, and then we sit on the roof of a building with a picnic and watch the sunset together

12. when did they know that loved each other, and when did they first tell each other that they loved one another? i knew i loved rin when i started noticing how much i loved it when he smiled, no matter how rare that instance is. he fell for me when he realised that his playful insults for me like "nerd" or "smartass" became affectionate. we first started using the word "love" pretty early, because you only live once, so maybe a month or so into the relationship.

13. who likes to give the other hugs from behind followed by a kiss? this is rin. 100% rin.

14. who would make a playlist for the other person? what would be featured on the playlist? ME ME ME - and it would be a bunch of like arctic monkeys and chase atlantic, kinda dark vibe love songs, but i would also make him a sweet playlist filled with pretty songs about love

15. who would bring their partner on a romantic date under the stars? i think it would be me, but rin would very much enjoy it.

[spxllcxstxr]

🚢 — hi love, i was wondering if i could get ship for hp in the marauders era? i’m terribly sorry if these are closed, feel free to ignore this!!

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my pronouns are she/her or she/they... i’m still debating which set i like better haha and i would like a male ship pretty please <3

i am a ravenclaw, with some slytherin & hufflepuff traits here and there :) and i am an ambivert!

i am, much to my dismay, only 5’ 1.5” (to all my tall peeps out there... saying that i’m jealous of you would be an understatement.) i am quite curvy (and omg kinda insecure abt that ✌️) i have long, silky, and straight black hair that reaches the base of my back, and i love eyeliner so so much like i’m not even joking (on good days at least)

people often tell me that at first glance i seem bubbly, happy, and kinda quiet or shy hehe, and my friends have said that once you get to know me i am genuine, creative, funny, empathetic, a good listener, charming, painfully stubborn, righteous, and little loud, and very very dramatic jhjfk

i am pretty shy in new environments but with my friends i am loud asf, like seriously i need to shut up 😐 i am very very loyal and i value any bit of trust someone has in me.

my love language is definitely physical touch. i am one of those affectionate yet somehow touch-starved people haha! i find that sometimes words (or saying them atleast) can be a little bit hard and awkward for me, so i like to project my feelings and love for people through physical contact and all the affection they could ever dream of <3 and omg that thing where someone leans into your touch? marvelous. absolutley marvelous.

i like it when people play with my hair or touch me in some way, although if they’re a stranger then i will pull out my ninja moves and roundhouse kick them if they touch me 🤺 i also really like to play with other peoples hair!! (my love for long-ish hair is showing hnng-)

i could ramble about the sky, the stars, and just astronomy in general for days and never get tired of it, bc wow have you ever seen the night sky? i get so excited when i recognize a star or a constellation or a planet and agh i just love astronomy!! star gazing is one of my most favorite things to do <3 (and i have a these necklaces that i love so so much okay, one has the constellation of my zodiac, and the other has my fave constellation!!!)

i am a very very sassy, sarcastic, and witty person! i live for playful banter and teasing, i guess you could say that’s my way of flirting after me and the person i’m interested in have a friendship aha! i have comebacks for days and will not hesitate to roast someone into oblivion (although if it’s that harsh then i’ll immediately apologize bc i pinky promise i'm not mean okay)

i love to draw! i have a sketchbook and it’s strictly for my eyes only, UNLESS i deem someone special enough to view my sacred scribbles <33 i love to sketch people and things, and this might sound creepy but i have this urge to draw the people i’m close to sometimes (i did this a few times and omg i felt so embarrassed so i hid the drawings rip)

singing and music is also a big interest of mine! i’m not the best with instruments (i took viola for a while and i can still play but im no prodigy) but i am pretty good with my voice. people have told me that i have an ~aesthetic~ singing voice and that i have good vocal range hehe! sometimes i randomly break out into song around people i’m close to and they always either laugh or scoff and call me a ‘drama queen’ (i live for theatrics if you can’t tell, anyone who can match my dramatic flare is just yes <33)

oh and i am always down to do dangerous, stupid, and fun shit with my friends AHA 😙‼️i like to focus on the positive side of things, but i do have my icky days where i feel super insecure, sad, and useless ahaha 🥲✌️ my friends always make me feel better tho <3

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whoops omg this was so long, i am SO SORRY

(pls accept my apology bc i feel kinda bad now 🥲)

congratulations on 500!! you deserve each and every follower you have and i am just so so happy for you!

mwah mwah tysm and make sure you’re drinking water and taking care of yourself, love!! 💞💞

Ahhh thank you so so much!! ❤️❤️ don’t worry, these aren’t closed until the 26th I just haven’t been linking to it because I’m lazy 😳 anywayyyyy ship under the cut! ❤️

I ship you with: James Potter!

The ravenclaw tower is cool and all, but you totally going to be hanging out in the Gryffindor common room a lot

James will sneak into your common room though

I promise

You’re short. Just thought I should say that lmao

James thinks it’s so cute though

I’m going to say that James is going to give you piggyback rides throughout the castle

Like even to class

Loves that he has to reach things for you

“C’mon short stuff!”

“Don’t call me short stuff, James!”

“Then stop being short!”

James absolutely loves your body

Like is in love with it

And he will shower you in love all the time

And of you ever get insecure he is right by your side

No matter what

He loves you so much

HE LOVES YOUR HAIR

James will want to brush it and braid it and do weird shit with it

Please put eyeliner on James

He’d look so hot

Janes is a bubbly guy

So I just feel like your personalities match so well

Like you guys are the couple that is always laughing at something

Or making faces at each other from across the room

James doesn’t want you to shut up ever

Because he never shuts up

He loves your voice

Even if you’re just reading some boring book out loud

Falls in love with you every day

JAMES LOVES TOUCH

I swear he will always be touching you

Hand holding

Leaning on you

Anything

Always always touching

Does that thing where he kisses the back of your hand

Like I mentioned before

James loves hearing you talk

So please ramble about space

All the time

Takes you to stargaze

All the time

(You’re going to do his astronomy homework too)

Playful banter is a must

James is cocky and playful and just

Overall sarcastic and sassy

So you guys are going to have loads of fun

Loses his shit when you roast someone

Claps for no reason

“That’s my girl!”

YOU DRAW??? That’s so cool

James always wan s to see what you’re drawing

But respects your boundaries and your privacy

Will hang your drawings up in his room if you give anything to him

Loves them so much

Singing!!!!!

You guys will sing a lot

He will request the Beatles a lot

But like you can just burst out into song randomly and he goes wild

He’s your number one fan don’t worry

You are definitely part of the Marauders

So

Dangerous and crazy shit is a must

James will always be a shoulder for you to cry on

and like

He just loves you so much

Nd always wants to be around you

He hates seeing you insecure or doubt yourself

“You’re my girl. And I love my girl.”

I hope you like your ship! And drink some water!! ❤️