#such a fucking bitch to deal with. can it leave me alone . i’d like to feel comfortable please

[cakepoppresent]

Let Me Beat His Ass

A few things

Lol poor Daisuke his future wife is going through it and hasn't been returning his texts or calls

Malcolm truly is a big baby. Since Malcolm has been told "no" by Luna he doesn't know how to react. He's taking her wanting to see Andre as a personal attack against him rather than his sister just wanting to find out the truth.

Love Veronica and Luna, in an alt time they would have been GREAT

Transcript under the cut ~

Luna: She’s looking into it, she trying to find this “source”, Chantel isn’t saying who told her

The comments under the pic (it's much smaller on a phone than a computer)

@toucanman - I fucking knew it a rich girl like her would never actually be nice, she was just hiding her bitch ass attitude

@coochielicker - This isn’t the Luna I stan! All SMZ does is lie lie and LIE. Shes been acting for years and its only now shes a diva? Stop playing with my good sis!

@flo- Hmmm...I can see it tho, shes from a super wealthy family its probably her way or no way but who cares was anyone even hurt?

@fruitysims - LOL ive been waiting on something to come out on this hoe. Her nice girl shtick was so overbearing now her true colors are coming out. Thank god

----------------------

Veronica: What did Destiny say? Is she gonna do anything about this?

Veronica: You should send her bitch ass a lawyers letter or something. Can’t be legal to spread malaious rumors like that

Luna: I dunno. I’d rather find this source

Veronica: Where the hell is that man of yours? He must have connections he can use

Luna: Probably... he’s been calling but I don’t even have the time to deal with him right now. Malcolm that bitch still won’t talk to me and now Andre’s face is all over the news and my bitch Dad hasn't even called. It's...a lot right now

Veronica: Let’s travel then, How about Tomarang or Tartosa? Just until everything dies down and you figure out what to do next

Luna: No...I don’t want to leave Andre to deal with this alone and Malcolm is gonna crash out once he sees this online...I can’t leave right now

Veronica: Get off your phone babes. Reading all these comments is going to make you feel worse.

Luna: This is fucking awful and I miss Malcolm, can’t believe his ass won’t talk to me. Benji gives me updates but I’d like to meet Andre with Malcolm.

Veronica: Malcolm is the biggest fucking baby you gotta force him to see reason. If you don’t he’s just gonna pout and mop all day. Let me talk to him

Luna: What are you gonna do? Beat him up?

Veronica: Yes? Beat him up verbally at least. You’re hurting and he needs to get over himself, I'll help him see reason

Luna: He really does listen to you. Don’t be too harsh on him

Veronica: Hush. It's important you guys deal with this Andre thing. Malcolm needs to at least hear him out and stop punishing you for wanting to talk to Andre

Luna: Hahaha Malcolm has always been so sensitive, I wonder where he gets his bitch ass attitude from

Luna: V... it's been hell these past few days. It means a lot that you’re here with me now

Veronica: Babe. You’re basically my sister and I love you. Whatever is happening now will pass I know it will.

Luna: Feels like it's never going to end everything is going to fucking shit. I’ve never fought with Malcolm like this and Benji doesn’t know what to do he hates being in the middle of all this

Veronica: Sleep it off. I can’t help with what's going on online but I can and I WILL speak with Malcolm okay?

Luna: Okay...

Veronica: No more tears babe. I’ll beat his ass up if I have to. Just wait for my call okay?

Veronica: Love you too babes

Luna: Love you V

[mars-ipan]

oh my fucking god i hateeeee being dissociated so bad. i haven’t been this heavily Not Present since i got sick and that was mostly blood loss. put me back in my body NOW

[freedomfireflies]

404*

Summary: The one where you and Harry are software engineers on a project for Juno Inc.

And you can’t fucking stand each other.

Word Count: 2.6k

*Contains Mature and Explicit content! Please only consume what you feel comfortable with!💞You are so much more important!*

(Note: This edit is not mine!! I believe the @ is on it, but full credit to the incredible creator! It's so perfect!!)

“What the hell are you still doing here?”

Your eyes never leave the computer screen as Harry’s familiarly snippy question echoes across the empty lab. “Working,” you answer simply.

He snorts as the door falls shut behind him. “It’s two in the fucking morning, I thought you left hours ago.”

“I did. And then I came back.”

You vaguely hear him walk further into the dark room, slipping around the different tables as he moseys his way closer. “Why?”

“S’this fucking sequence,” you mumble, now glaring at the different variants that litter the test. “Every time I run the simulation, the connection fails. And it shouldn’t.”

Your peripheral catches the way he uses his knuckle to push his glasses further up the bridge of his nose. “Is there a missing link?”

“There shouldn’t be. I’ve run it before, and it’s worked fine. But now it’s not. It’s like something is broken.”

“Or missing,” he argues, coming to a stop behind your chair. He studies the project from over your shoulder, and you feel your muscles recoil when you get a whiff of his cologne. “There could be something wrong with the back end.”

“Okay, well, there’s not,” you retort, shooting him a quick glare. “I already checked.”

“Well maybe you missed it. You have a tendency to misplace things.”

“I didn’t misplace it, Harold, I studied every inch of that fucking code, and there was nothing broken or missing.”

He leans back, arms crossing as he regards both you and the program. “Maybe you should check it again.”

“And maybe you should bite me,” you huff, too overworked to deal with the snarky attitude. “I really don’t have time for this today, all right? Can you just leave me to it?”

“I’d like to, but clearly you don’t know what you’re doing,” he replies calmly, and even without looking at him, you can sense his smug smile. “Every time I leave you to it, I come back to find out you’ve wrecked our project.”

Your eyes roll. “First of all, it’s not our project. It’s my project. And second…why are you even here? I thought you had shit to do tonight.”

“I did, but I’m done now.”

“Oh, so, naturally you came back just to annoy me?”

“Naturally.” He places his hand on the desk beside you and leans down, hovering near your arm as he glances over the computer. “There could be something wrong with the framework. Try the sequence again, I wanna see how it behaves.”

“No thanks.”

Harry smirks, and you realize you don’t like how close his face is. “Relax, Tinkerbell, I just wanna help.”

“And I don’t want your help,” you remind him, using your elbow to shove him to the side. “I’ve spent months with this program, it’s my baby, and I will fix it alone.”

“We’re supposed to be working together,” he argues, but it’s much too coy. “So stop being such a bitch and just run the goddamn sequence.”

You snort under your breath as you spin around in your chair to look at him. “It was that bad, huh?”

He settles back against the table behind him, hands shoving into his pockets as he stares right back. “What was bad?”

“The sex.” You jut your chin toward him. “The thing you had to do tonight. It was bad enough that you had to come back here and start swinging your dick around just to feel better.”

He smirks, tongue running over his bottom lip. “It was fine.”

“Fine? Gee, how romantic.”

He exhales an amused laugh and glances around the lab. “She was still hung up on her ex. Think it lasted all of fifteen minutes, and I’m pretty sure she faked it.”

“Well, she was having sex with you. Of course she faked it.”

His smile gets a bit bigger. “Well, I faked it, too.”

“You?” you scoff. “No way. She could have sneezed on your cock, and you still would have cum.”

His head shakes, grinning wildly. “Normally, yeah. But we both just wanted to get out of there.”

“Poor girl.”

“Yeah? What about poor me?”

“Oh, I never feel sorry for you. You always find a way to get what you want eventually.”

His head tilts, green eyes sparkling behind the tortoiseshell frames of his glasses. “Do I?”

“Clearly.” You settle back into your chair, legs crossing. “I mean, have you ever heard the word no in your life?”

“Hear it all the time with you.”

“Exactly. I’m doing you a favor.”

“Oh, really?”

“Yeah. I’m keeping you humble.”

“Is that right?”

“It is.”

That smug look of endearment returns as the lab falls silent. He watches you for quite some time, and you think that you’d pay anything to hear what he’s really thinking.

Then, he smirks. “Good,” he says, and with that, he’s pushing off the desk and striding to you.

He bridges the five-foot gap between you with ease, and you aren’t even afforded the chance to take a breath before he’s grabbing hold of your face and kissing you.

His large body bends in order to reach you in the chair, but you can feel him tugging on you. Encouraging you up and into his hold as you gasp against his mouth and allow him to help you stand.

It’s a seamless dance. Familiar. He grabs onto your hips and slams you onto the desk, knocking a few pens and some of the various equipment out of the way.

His hands are sliding up your shirt. Memorizing the expanse of your skin as his lips press into your neck. Nipping and sucking just below your ear in the way he knows you love.

Your fingers have disappeared into his curls. They’re soft and oddly comforting. Perfect to tug on as you whimper gently and arch your back. Pressing your tits against his chest as he groans.

“Can I tell you a secret?” he murmurs, now sliding his hand toward the zipper on your jeans.

You nod quickly, mewling as you practically buck into his touch.

He smiles, mouth trailing across your jaw, “I was thinking about someone else, too.”

Your lashes flutter shut.

“The whole time,” he carries on, rough fingertips dancing down the front of your underwear. “When I was with her. Couldn’t think about anybody else but you. Every time she’d whine or say my name, I thought about how you’d do it. How you’d sound, how you’d feel.”

Your nails scratch down his black t-shirt, needing more than anything to feel his skin. See it littered with your marks. Your claim.

“She could never do it right,” he tells you, and it makes your stomach wrench. “Never do it like you.”

“Yeah?” you manage to breathe, wiggling in an effort to help him yank your pants down. “S’that why you couldn’t get hard?”

He grins as he flicks his belt undone. “Who says I couldn’t get hard?”

With a rather determined tug, he shoves your panties to the side, large hands stroking through your folds.

“Because if I’m thinking about you,” he whispers, eyes trained on your cunt, “I’m always fucking hard.”

You whine when he thrusts inside, two fingers to start. He’s rarely gentle, but you love it. And so does he, obsessed with the image of your pussy stretching around him. Any part of him. His tongue, his hands, his cock.

He’s bigger than most, and he always makes sure to prep you before he gives you what you really want. Granted, he taunts you with the idea of ruining you and splitting your poor cunt in half each time. Driving himself to the hilt before your tight little hole is ready. He likes the idea of corrupting you for someone else. 

“Relax,” he instructs, soft but firm. “S’gonna hurt a lot more if you don’t.”

You drop your head back and balance yourself on your hands, legs pushed open by his hips. “I’m trying,” you whimper, just to see his jaw clench.

“Gonna have to try harder,” he says, working his fingers into your wet cunt while his glasses slowly begin to slip down his nose. Settling at a crooked angle, and it makes you smile. “Can’t give you my cock if you don’t.”

You push your lips into a pout. “Please, Har.”

He looks up, the veins in his neck prominent as he seems to swallow another groan. “You’re so tight, Tink. Gonna wreck this pretty pussy if I don’t get you stretched.”

“Good,” you moan, thighs shaking as he brings a third finger closer. “Want you to.”

He grins. “Yeah?”

You nod fervently. “Want you to do whatever you want. I’m always good for you. Always fit you.”

“You do,” he agrees quietly, the heel of his hand pressing into your clit as he works through your arousal at a quicker pace. “Always take me so well. Even when it makes you cry.”

You whine again at the thought as he finally yanks his fingers free and moves to retrieve his cock. 

You’re nearly salivating at the idea, scooting toward the edge of the table in preparation as he pulls himself out and steps up to you.

Your eyes widen when you see him. Hard and heavy in his hand, leaking the most delicious looking drops of pre-cum that you’re already thrilled he never offered this other girl.

He runs the tip through your folds a time or two, making you both squirm before he gently begins to push in.

You have to give him props for the amount of restraint he always demonstrates for you. The ability to go slow and be delicate despite the fact all he wants to do is ram himself inside you and settle into your warm cunt.

Like now. You can see the effects of such sluggish movements, the way he holds himself back until he’s sure you’ll be all right. Teeth gritting, muscles tensed, cock throbbing.

You reach out and gently slide his glasses back up, making sure they’re comfortable and that he can see all right before kissing him. “Okay…okay, go.”

He kisses you back quickly before studying you. “Are you sure?”

“Yeah,” you whimper, hooking your leg around his hip. “Need it, Har, please.”

And that’s all it takes for him to sheath himself inside your aching pussy, disappearing completely between your legs as you both moan.

The quiet lab isn’t so quiet anymore, and you throw your arms around his neck as he begins to pull out and push back in.

“There she is,” he grunts, large hand squeezing your thigh to keep you still. “Look at you, Tink, taking me so well.”

“Always,” you exhale, pressing your mouth to his cheek. 

“Better than she ever was,” he continues, setting a quicker rhythm now. “So much better.”

He’s pounding you into the desk, hitting spots that make you see stars, and you clench around him until he gasps.

“Funny how well you take me…when you claim to hate me so much,” he says now, unable to resist needling you, and you whimper.

“I do,” you insist, despite the way you scratch down his back. “Fucking hate you.”

“Yeah?” His hips snap to yours. “S’that why you always beg for my cock?”

You don’t like the insinuation that you beg him for anything, especially when you know that he’s right. But you’re too far gone right now to take care, equally as depraved of pleasure as he seems to be.

The two of you don’t do this often. Maybe once or twice a month, if that. Most of the time, it’s incredibly unfriendly. A quick fuck in the supply closet or in his car in the parking lot. In between quippy remarks about how fucking unhinged the other is. How idiotic, and uncouth, and how goddamn annoying.

Because he is. So endlessly annoying and every day you have to resist the urge to slap those fucking glasses off his face.

But he knows how to fuck. That much is certain, and despite your immeasurable hatred for him, you can’t help but fall victim to his prowess.

In fact, moments like this are about the only time you don’t mind him. That you can actually stand him, and even want to submit to him.

Of course, you’re filled with regret and embarrassment the second you’re both finished, but for these few minutes…you don’t mind.

“Every fucking day,” he continues, holding onto your waist as he buries his cock deeper. “Have to watch you parade around like you’re fucking God’s gift to technology.”

You’d snort if you had enough air in your lungs to do so. 

“In your fucking tight little tank tops and see through dresses,” he seethes, dragging you back to the edge of the desk to angle you the way he likes. “With your hair always up in that stupid ponytail. Just begging to be pulled. To be yanked onto your knees while you take me down your throat.”

Your eyes roll back as you keen into his body. Memories of swallowing around him flooding your mind as you shiver.

Despite his aggravating remarks, he’s always so proud of you when you take his cock down your throat. He knows it’s a lot and he knows he can’t force you to do anything your body isn’t equipped to handle.

But he’s enamored with the way you try. Pleased to see you lick him, suck him, take as much of him as you can. He might hate you, but he praises you more than anybody else ever has.

And it’s one of the main reasons you can’t quit him.

“Then maybe…you shouldn’t look,” you pant, whimpering when he thrusts particularly hard. “I don’t wear that shit for you.”

He snorts, now grabbing onto your wrist and forcing your hand against your clit. He moves your fingers for you, pressing them into the sensitive nerves until you cry out and clamp down on him again.

“No?” he taunts, cock twitching inside you as he nears his release. “Then who do you wear it for, hm? Fucking Sam?”

You make another noise as he pushes your body into more immense pleasure, touch still locked atop yours.

“No, not Sam,” he decides. “Cause Sam can’t do it the way I can. S’why you came to me, isn’t it?”

You don’t dignify this with a response. You don’t have to. He knows.

“Sam can’t make you cum, can he?” Harry continues, almost vengefully as he feels you get closer. “Never fucking could. That’s why you only cum for me.”

It’s blinding. So intense that it makes your entire body ache as you fall victim to the wave of pleasure pulling you under.

He’s right behind you, spilling into your cunt before spilling out of it. Dripping down your legs, down the table, down his thighs as you both ride each other through the bliss.

He doesn’t let you release your clit for at least a good two minutes after, ignoring your pleas for mercy as your body struggles against the sensation.

It’s overwhelming. Hot, sticky, sweaty. He pulls out to go grab a towel from the supply closet before bringing it back and helping you clean up. 

He leaves a few teasing licks to your cunt in the process, and you swat your hand across his head in warning.

He smirks.

Once he’s finished, he pulls your jeans back on and up before tucking himself into his pants to do the same. 

Then, after helping you hop down, he offers you a lopsided grin and pushes his glasses back up.

“Now,” he says coyly, “go be a good girl and run the fucking sequence.”

Next Part:

~ Off the Shelf* (pt. 2)

~ Full 404 Masterlist

~ Main Masterlist

~ Blurb Masterlist

Taglist: @walkingintheheartbreaksatellite @keepdrivingkisses @swiftmendeshoran @tiredinwinter @straightontilmornin @justlemmeadoreyou @harrysdaydreams @tiaamberxx @peterparker1sgf @myfavfanficsever @littlenatilda @vamprry @fdl305 @tchalametishot @ssaama @indierockgirrl @likeapplejuicenpeach @vane28282

[scoonsalicious]

Unwanted: Chapter 16, Unaccompanied - Pt. 2

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Avenger!Fem!Reader

Summary: When your FWB relationship with your best friend Bucky Barnes turns into something more, you couldn’t be happier. That is, however, until a new Avenger sets her sights on your super soldier and he inadvertently breaks your heart. You take on a mission you might not be prepared for to put some distance between the two of you and open yourself up to past traumas. Too bad the only one who can help you heal is the one person you can no longer trust.

Warnings: (For this part only; see Story Masterlist for general Warnings) Language,

Word Count: 881

Previously On...: You were juuuuust about to leave for your first mission with Bucky, but have been felled by a nasty stomach bug, leaving Bucky to go off on the mission alone :(

A/N: Fuck it! I'm in a generous mood!

Dun, dun, DUN! NOTE! The tag list is a fickle bitch, so I'm not really going to be dealing with it anymore. If you want to be notified when I update, please enable notifications from my Blog page!

Banner By: The absolutely amazing @mrsbuckybarnes1917!

Thank you to all those who have been reading; if you like what you've read, likes, comments, and reblogs give me life, and I truly appreciate them, and you!

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You woke up a few hours later. You felt a bit better, but an all encompassing fatigue still settled over your body. You stretched and grabbed your phone to check the time. Glancing at your phone’s screen, you saw you had multiple missed calls from Bucky, and text messages asking you to call him back as soon as you could.

Concerned, you hit the button to dial him back. He picked up immediately.

“Baby,” he breathed, sounding relieved. “I am so sorry, I have no idea how this happened, but I swear, I had nothing to do with it. I was fully prepared to go by myself, but—”

“Bucky,” you interrupted, “what are you talking about?”

“Fucking Carthage,” he seethed, and you could feel his anger through the phone. “She’s on the Quinjet with me. I told Steve I was fine going alone, but I set the autopilot for takeoff and she was just there. I’m so sorry, sweets. I know you got no reason to believe me, but I didn’t ask for this. I don’t want this. She’s the last person I want to be trapped in this bird with, let alone on a mission with. I locked myself in the fucking cockpit just to keep her the hell away from me.”

Your stomach dropped, but you could hear the anxiety and rage in his voice, and maybe you were stupid, but you truly believed this had taken him by as much surprise as it had taken you. “It’s okay, baby,” you told him after you’d taken a breath, not realizing you’d let the endearment slip through. “I believe you; it’s not your fault.”

“I promised you I’d cut her out,” he bemoaned. “This makes me a fucking piece of shit all over again, and I hate it. I hate what it must be doing to you right now. I’m so sorry.”

You were feeling nauseous again, though from your stomach bug or the current situation, you weren’t quite sure. “You can’t help this, Buck. It’s beyond your control, I get that. I really do. I know I can’t expect you to ignore her while you’re on a mission together. You don’t have to worry about breaking your promise to me right now, okay? It’s extenuating circumstances.”

“I’ll only talk to her about mission-related shit,” he promised. “I’ll ignore everything else, I swear.”

“Yeah,” you said, running a hand through your hair. “Yeah, that’s good. We can work with that, Buck. It’s okay; we can get through this.

“I’m so sorry, Pocket.” Bucky’s voice was mournful. “It’s another promise I made to you that I’m not keeping. 

You talked to him for a while longer, reassuring him you didn’t blame him for the current state of affairs, and that you weren’t going to hold any contact he needed to have with her against him. Occasionally, you could hear Jade pounding on the cockpit door, and Bucky would shout that, if it wasn’t about the mission, he didn’t want to hear it. 

After about an hour and a half, Bucky swore softly. “I’m sorry, sweets– looks like we’re heading into a storm. I’m gonna have to take the jet off autopilot and fly her manual til we’re through it.”

“Yeah, of course, Buck,” you said, knowing he was telling you he had to hang up. “Text me when you land, okay?”

“‘Course, doll,” he said, and you could hear him smile into the phone. “I’ll be doin’ everything in my power to get this mission over as soon as possible.”

“Just come home to me safe and sound, Barnes,” you told him. “That’s the important thing.” 

“Always,” he said. “I’ll talk to you later.”

“Hey, Buck?” you asked, before he had a chance to hang up. “I love you, okay? So much.” You still did, despite everything, and you wanted him to know it.

“I don’t deserve you, sweetheart,” he said, “but I love you, too. More than anything.”

You said your goodbyes and were left in the quiet of your room. You needed to have a conversation with Tony, but before you set out to find him, you had one burning question you needed answered.

“Hey FRIDAY?” you called.

“Yes, Ms. (Y/L/N)?” came the disembodied Irish voice.

“Why didn’t you alert me when Sergeant Barnes and Ms. Carthage interacted aboard the Quinjet?” you asked.

“You asked for all interactions within the Tower,” FRIDAY replied. “The Quinjet does not technically meet the parameters of your request and thus was not included.”

You rolled your eyes. Of course the AI would get caught up in semantics. “Okay, fine. Adjust the parameters of the request to include any and all interactions occurring between the two on the Quinjet, as well,” you requested. 

The AI agreed, and you let out a sigh. You felt terrible about essentially spying on Bucky, but the truth was, you still didn’t fully trust him again. You wanted to, more than anything, but you just couldn’t. You hated what you had become, what the situation, his actions, had turned you into. If you were the kind of girl who believed in a higher power, you’d be praying to any deity who would listen that this mission would be over before your anxiety got the best of you.

<- Previous Part / Next Part ->

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Rock, Meet Hard Place 3

Warnings: this fic will include elements, some dark, such as noncon/dubcon, and other untagged triggers. Please take this into account before proceeding. It is up to curate your online consumption safely.

Summary: your boss makes a deal that proves less than beneficial for you.

Characters: Nick Fowler, Lloyd Hansen

Author’s Note: This is what you asked for so don’t even.

Please feel free to leave some feedback, reblog, and jump into my asks. I’m always happy to discuss with you and riff on idea. As always, you are cherished and adored! Stay safe, be kind, and treat yourself 💜

He thinks you don’t notice him slink in, but you do. You heard his sighs from down the hall. You look up just as he reaches his office door. 

“He all settled in then?” 

Fowler stops and slaps his hand on the door frame. He drops his chin, agitation ticking in his jaw. “He’s... going for a run? I don’t know. He said his ass was cramped from driving all day then tried to grab me again.” He shakes his head and looks at you. “Can you look into hotels?” 

“You’re sending him away already?” 

“No, it’s for me,” he sneers. 

You nearly laugh but you hold back. 

“I mean, he coulda pulled a knife?” You suggest. 

“I’d prefer that,” he drags his hand off the wall and crosses his arms. “Don’t grin at me like that.” 

“I’m not grinning. This is just how my face is.” 

“You’re fucking smirking,” he stomps closer. 

You roll your eyes, “alright,” you wipe your expression and dawn the bitch face you’ve spent decades honing. He nearly recoils. 

“Not better,” he chides. 

You push your shoulders up and sit back, “so, hotel? Executive sweet, extra wine?” 

“Forget it. I’ll deal with the idiot. I don’t trust him here alone.” 

“Wise. I was going to say but he’s really not my problem. I just handle the noise.” 

“You really have to gloat?” He huffs. 

“Gloat? Come on, Fowler, you can handle just as well as I did--” 

“No, I need him in line. I can’t go popping him in the face, as much as he might beg for it.” 

“Wow, character growth. Never thought I’d see the day,” you mock. 

“Hey,” he points at you, “don’t. You sound just like him.” 

You squint and stand, “now that’s just insulting.” You step up to him. “I could grow a way better mustache.” 

He snorts and turns away, “alright then. I need a drink.” 

“Me too,” you check your watch. “I’m gonna clock out--” 

“Clock out,” he pauses and looks over his shoulder. 

“Believe it or not, I have a life,” you jeer. “So, since you have that cretin on a leash, I’ll just be off mine.” 

You go to the rack and take your jacket and your bag. You sense him watching you. You face him. 

“Unless I’ve forgotten something?” 

“You’re abandoning me,” he accuses. 

“Oh, I am,” you confirm and turn on your heel, “ta.” 

You stride out and exhale as you head down the hall. You really just want to go home and soak in your tub with a glass of rose. For all the work you put in, you don’t get to enjoy the fruits of your labour as much as you’d like. 

As you get to the door, another approaches. You meet Hansen with a derisive look as his lips curl. 

“Ah there she is. Where’re you off too? Nicky Blue Eyes have you running out for lube--” 

He’s wearing a loose shirt with no sides, his ribs and stomach peeking out, his arms exposed. His running shorts stop high on his thigh and echo another era. You tilt your head at him wryly. 

“Don’t twist your ankle.” 

“Aw, you worried about me, baby cakes?” 

“I’m worried about listening to you whine,” you scoff. 

You reach for the door and he gets there first, blocking your path. 

“Where’re you off to in such a hurry? Got a date? Don’t tell me there’s a Mister at home.” 

“Hansen, kindly, get out of my way.” 

“Oooh, spicy. Mama, I love that. Talk dirty to me.” 

You cross your arms and stare him down. You keep your expression placid as you watch him. Patient. The stone sets in your eyes. 

He flinches and gives an emphatic shudder, “oof, you can do that on demand, eh? That’s cold.” He wiggles his shoulders and winks, “the ice queen must be upon her mission.” He opens the door and holds it as he waves through, “As long I get to watch you walk away, you’re free to go.” 

You don’t give him even the twitch of your eye. You step through march down the walk to the gate. He whistles behind you but you don’t catch his last comment. Whatever it is, isn’t worth hearing. 

As you come out the other side of the fence, you let your posture ease. You take out your personal phone and swipe through your notifications. There isn’t very much. Some promotions from the wine show you went to a few months back and some messages you’d rather not deal with. Yet, he is persistent. 

You get in your car and throw your purse in the other seat. You linger as you mull the texts. It would save you a trip to the grocery store. As long as the offer is still on the table. 

You key in your message; ‘home in thirty. If you’re still in the area, you may leave it at my door.’ 

You drop the phone on top of your bag and start the engine. You turn up the music, Ronstadt mostly, and start your drive home. You drift into the blur of traffic, following the usual twists and turns of your route. 

As you pull up to your walk-up, you slow. You could tear his hair out. Yes, you are aware, you take and don’t give, but that’s how it needs to be with his sort. Next to a crate of fresh produce, Cole sits, perking up as you approach the steps. 

“It’s late. Sorry, but I had a long day--” 

“I know,” he stands and lifts the box, “but I just wanted to say hi, you know? We never see each other. You’re so busy.” 

“As are you. I hear farm work is a lot,” you climb the stairs and face him. “Thank you for this.” 

“Anytime,” he keeps the box away from your reach. “Let me. It’s heavy.” 

“Really, there’s no need--” 

“I’ll just bring it in and go. Promise. Not like last time.” 

You sigh. You’re too tired. Tired of dealing with needy men. 

“In and out,” you demand. 

He grins bigger. You step past him and unlock the door. You enter and he follows, his elbow hitting the door. You point to the side table and he sets down the crate. 

“Good, now, goodbye.” You say. 

“Wait, please, what did I do--” 

“Cole, nothing. You did nothing. It was one night.” 

He pouts and slumps, “it could be more.” 

“I’m too busy. Go find a girl with time.” And interest... 

He nods mopily and turns reluctantly. You follow him to the door and close it behind him, almost pushing him out with it. The free delivery and fresh tomatoes are worth the excruciating encounter. You deal with worse than him. 

[myersmaniac]

~ Can I stay here?~

Parings- Billy Hargrove x Henderson! reader

TW: bullying

___

Alone, at night, in the cold rain. Sure it’s dangerous to be walking tonight but I needed some fresh air and I never minded the rain. I figured I’d pick a bag of chips or something like that up from the gas station then head back home.

____

I finally made it to the gas station and walked inside, there stood Jason Carver as soon as I opened the door. Usually he taunts me at school but thankfully no words were spoken, I grabbed some chips and a coke, went to check out then walked out the door but when I turned the corner he was still there. “ Henderson” Jason called out “ what you doing out so late?” All I could think to myself is why does he care and why is he talking to me, I rolled my eyes “ I asked you a question Henderson.” Jason said as he stepped closer.

“ and I never gave an answer Jason so back off.” I said very sternly. Jason just scoffed “ you know you really are a bitch.” He nudged at my shoulder, I’m not sure if he meant for me to fall or not but the ground was wet and he is much stronger than me. I scraped my elbow on the way down and it bled. “ fuck you dude.” I said getting off the ground. He finally left.

After that dreadful encounter I felt like I needed even more time to myself, time to ponder why assholes like him are the popular kids, time to think about how unnecessarily mean some people can be. As I walked around thinking about anything but the time I realized it was darker than before and definitely much later. When I left my house it was around 9:30 I thought to myself by now it has to be at least 11:00. I tend to get lost in my own mind so it doesn’t surprise me that I’ve been walking around for that long. I check my surroundings and I can see that I’m in a very familiar place, Max’s house. I’ve dropped her off and picked her up here many times, I’m so glad her and Dustin are friends. Since they’ve met she’s become like the little sister I never had.

Well it’s to late to walk all the way back home and I know max said her parents are out of town this week so I might as well crash here. I walk up to the door step and knock; I really hate to bother anyone this late but seriously the walk home would take forever and I’m already getting tired. I knock again this time calling out “ hellooo” I hear footsteps walking towards the door and I step back. Max’s brother Billy opens the door.

I’ve spoke to Billy a few times before, he knows our siblings are friends. He’s always been kind to me despite what other people might say about him. I really feel sorry for Billy, I know him and max both deal with a lot at home and I just don’t think people understand.

“ Henderson? What’s going on?” Billy questions looking like he just woke up, rubbing the sleepiness from his eyes. “ Billy I hate to intrude but can I stay here for the night? I’ll leave if you want but I just went out to clear my head a while ago and I just don’t feel to safe walking back this late.” I said to the boy in front of me. “ you’re bleeding.” Billy pointed out the scrape on my arm. “ it’s nothing really I just had a run in with Jason Carver.” Billy’s expression changed very quickly. “ come in and tell me what happened” he said. I came in and closed the door behind me, I tried to be as quiet as possible to avoid waking up Max.

I followed Billy down the hall and went into his room, we both sat on the bed. “ Well” I began “ I was at the gas station up the road and I was about to leave there and he’s outside just blabbing on about something then he pushed me and left. Nothing to it just Jason being Jason but I scrapped my elbow on the ground.” I could tell something was off with Billy as I told him what happened. “ you really could’ve gotten hurt you know, you don’t need to be out this late anyways.” Billy said standing up and going over to his dresser he pulled out a t-shirt and some boxers and reached them out towards me. I looked at him with a confused expression. “ the bathrooms down the hall and to the left, you’re soaked” he said. “Grab you a bandaid and some neosporin while your in there, it’s above the sink.” I got up, nodded and smiled “ thanks” i went to go get changed then came back to his room. “ you didn’t put on a bandaid.” He said, he was definitely still tired. I could tell by his short and straight responses. “ oh yeah it’s fine don’t worry about it.” I responded. He looked at me with an expression that read “ are you serious.” He left the room and came back with a bandaid. He squatted down underneath me as I sat on the edge of his bed and lifted up my elbow, he put on the neosporin and then the bandaid very carefully. “ Billy really it was fine, you didn’t have to do that.” I told him. “I did it for the nursing experience” he said jokingly, I let out a small laugh. “ you know you kind of woke me up and I’m still confused as to why your here no offense. What do you say you lay down on my bed and let’s both get some sleep and we’ll talk in the morning” billy said. “ your bed? Oh no billy I’ll sleep in the living room or in the floor.” I responded to him. “ That’s no way to treat my guest, get in the bed Henderson. I’ll sleep in the living room.” Billy said. He was so kind to me even when he didn’t have to be.

“ Fine. I’ll sleep in the bed. But just so you know I do feel bad about you sleeping in the living room.” I said to Billy as I laid under his blanket. His bed smelled like him. A musk of strong cologne and cigarettes. I could get used to that. It was comforting in its own way.

About ten minutes passed and I tossed and turned, I just couldn’t sleep maybe it was because I was in an unfamiliar area or because I kept thinking of Mine and Billy’s interaction tonight. I also didn’t like sleeping alone, normally I sleep with a teddy bear or hugging my pillow tight. I finally gave in and walked to the living room where I found Billy still awake. “ you okay?” He questioned. “ I just can’t sleep, can you come stay in there with me please?” He breathed a heavy Breath then made his way back into his room. “ listen billy I’m really sorry for all of this, barging in, taking your clothes, you having to patch me up-” he cut me off quickly. “ it was my pleasure, I don’t mind it one bit so don’t think that you’re bothering me.” He said, I smiled. He cut out the light then crawled up on the bed beside me. “ Night Henderson.” He said. “ Goodnight Hargrove.” I said back.

[cheesysoup-arlo]

Cady’s Cousin (pt.1)

(pt. 2)/(pt. 3)/(pt. 4)

You’re cady’s cousin and you had to transfer to north shore senior year

Warnings: homophobia, use of slur (d-slur), violence?(idk) sexual harassment? (I’m not good at warnings I’m sorry)

A/N: before anyone is like “Aaron already graduated” I don’t think he did that poor boy got held back in my opinion you’re allowed to disagree also everyone’s gay SURPRISE these are all just my opinions feel free to disagree

You were hanging out with your cousin the Saturday before school was due to start and she said she invited some friends over when they arrived you were pleasantly surprised. Once you got settled and started chatting you joked “hey Cads I didn’t know you had cool friends, I thought you’d only knew math nerds like yourself, oh and I’m (Y/N) by the way” “oh right, this is my cousin, everyone say hi” the group says hi “ooo nice pants” you say to a girl with dyed green tips in her hair and the coolest pants you’ve ever seen “thanks, the name’s Janis by the way” she sticks out her hand for you to shake and you do “nice to me you” you say with a wink “ew stop being gay” the blonde one jokes “Regina shut up you literally have a girlfriend” Janis says lightly punching the blonde in the arm. “Is anyone in this group straight?” You say through a laugh “as of last week, nope” says a boy with brown hair who you honestly expected to be the token straight shaking his head “ah yes our baby gay, this is Aaron he just came out be patient with him” Regina says patting Aaron’s head. Two more girls and a boy show up “sorry we’re late Karen lost her phone” the more visual anxious and shorter of the two girls says “it was in the freezer” the boy says “oh who is this?” The boy asks genuinely curious “Cady’s cousin” Aaron says with a smile “can we like rapid fire everyone’s name and pronouns really quick for me” you ask getting a little confused. “I’ll go first even though you already know my name Cady, she/her” “Janis, they/she but honestly any I don’t really care” “Regina, she/her” “Damian, the badest/bitch no I’m just kidding he/him or they/them is cool” “Aaron, he/him? Those are the boy ones, right?” “yes Aaron good job” Janis says laughing and giving him a thumbs up “Karen, she/they? I think” “Gretchen, also she/they” Cady is happy to see that you seem to like her friends “what about you (Y/N)?” Regina asks “oh um (your pronouns) works” you say with an awkward thumbs up “so (y/n) where are you from and what brings you here?” Gretchen asks excited to know more about you “oh um I’m from Florida and I recently got suspended from my last school so my dad thought it would be a good idea to send me here to live with my aunt and Cady to “think about my highly irresponsible and destructive behavior” I honestly don’t think what I did was that big of a deal given the circumstances” you say kind of annoyed, the annoyance directed at your father “ooo what’d you do?” Janis asks suddenly more intrigued “oh I punched a dude in his face and lit his backpack on fire for harassing me but like it’s honestly not my fault if we think about it, I reported his behavior twice and told him if he didn’t leave me alone I’d punch him in the face and light his backpack on fire, He for some reason thought I was joking and when I was walking to lunch slapped my ass and said “give me a chance this dick can turn any dyke straight” then winked at me so I punched him and pulled out my lighter and whoosh fire” you said doing jazz hands when you said fire “that’s freakin awesome” Janis says enthusiastically and the group turns to look at her confused “oh um not the getting harassed part but like what you did was to that dude, that was like so tits” she explains “tits?” you say confused “i got this, “tits” is one of Janis’ fun little words she uses and it typically means awesome, really cool, or fuck yeah” Damian explains with a smile “tits” you say with a small chuckle “wait you’re from Florida? Have you ever seen an alligator?” Karen asks “yes I have they’re not as scary as people say” you respond “that’s like really cool” Karen says with a smile “oh my gosh your hair is like so fetch” Gretchen says after looking at you for a little bit “um thank you? I’m assuming that also means cool?” You say slowly and confused “yeah pretty much” Regina says patting Gretchen on the shoulder before she freaks out. Hanging out with them, you thought they were really cool so switching to a new school and state for your last year of high school might not suck as much as you thought .

A/N: guys I don’t know anything about Florida but it felt homophobic so I used it lmao also I think I’m gonna do this in parts I know I said Janis x cady’s cousin and I will give that to you but I want to know if you like it so far before I go hardcore into the story lol

[cxhleel108]

LITG S8 Thots for this week: What a great day!

• Girl this compatibility test kinda made no sense like I’m just answering questions that so obviously correlate to Oakley or Shawn what is the point???😭

• And what guy would that be exactly?…

• Oakley being most compatible with me AHA! y’all are never tearing us apart idgaf😛

• She’s so me like why I’m kinda in love with her.

• Outfit time un!

• Ok um…roaring twenties!

• This is so Emel coded. Aw I kinda miss her a lil.

• That poem chile…Max you gotta go😭😭😭

• Claudia toying with Liam and Max lame asses ughh that’s my muva DOWN.

• Team Shawn and Kyle actually cuz Liam and Max fucking suck omg. Also yes Kyle romancers you’ve converted me a little bit, he’s cute.

• Pushing Liam in the pool wasn’t enough tbh like he needs to drown I’m sorry.

• “I can’t stop thinking about last night” You mean when I kicked you out and slept alone Shawn? Ok.

• Bro this same shit happened last season what the fuck did I need to put on a dress for just to go speak to niggas??? Fusebox will do anything for a bag😭

• Anyways, outfit time deux!

• Werk!

• Great! Now I have to deal with Liam for the rest of the season🙂

• Being forced to bring a boy back is actually so dumb. What is he gonna be there for other than to watch me ride Oakley’s dick constantly?

• As she should! Let’s not act like Theo wouldn’t JUMP at the chance to taste this coochie if I let him, please.

• Me just having the option to leave Shawn behind back at the Villa god I feel so bad. I still did it tho😛

• AHHHHH EXACTLY BOO EXACTLYYYYYY!!!

• PFFFFFFTTTTT BE FOR REAL BRUH🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

• BAD BITCH PARTY OF ONE! BAD BITCH PARTY OF ONE YOUR TABLE IS READY!

• I’m sorry but-

• So glad I get to let Shawn know right away that I’m a girl on a mission and he’s just gonna have to be okay with that.

• Bitch don’t make my girl already have to slide yo ass after being back for three minutes.

• The daybeds chat ughhkdkdksns just give him back to me already like y’all keep playing with me!

• Ok first off, I looooove Hazel already she’s so cutesy and fun and girlypop. Second off, I really don’t give a fuck what happened while I was gone cuz at the end of the day…Sienna is NOT badder than me…like at all.

• Outfit time trois!

• Cheetah print so I can show this ho just how fast I can reclaim my man oh exactly!

• Bea sis I love you but you can’t be mad at Liam for being an ignorant fool when you brought said ignorant fool in here like…

• Ooo wait this different scenario options for different LIs gave me Choices tease for a second…why they can’t do this more often???

• This shit had me giggling and kicking my feet god I love this man.

• Hazel and Hari are lowkey goals I love this.

• LMAOOOOOOO LAME ASS🫵🏽🤣

• Uhhhh Luna don’t be mad just cuz I got the attention of four niggas in here and you only got the attention of one. We may have made up but TRUST I got enough smoke for you and Sienna!

• Everybody just watched Oakley and I share this romantic ass, dramatic ass, chick flick ass kiss but they still gon act like there’s a chance I want somebody else I hate it here.

• Course it was Liam that started the big blow up.

• How dare y’all assume I’d rat my bestie Claudia out omg?

• Them bringing my name up in that argument between Theo and Claudia just for it to not even mean anything…like I said earlier anything for a fucking bag.

• You’re telling me Jin and Luna were actually able to end their pointless arguement in a time frame of under two minutes this time? Wow shit really is changing around here.

• AHHHHH YOU MAD🫵🏽😝

• Oh brother can we just tell Oakley that we’d never cheat on him and get to fucking already jesus why do we have to wait for that AGAIN???

[michaelarson]

// tw suicidal ideation, mentions of child death, hallucinations

It took around 10 minutes to drive there, and another 10 minutes to walk to the spot. He could’ve walked the whole way there, sure, but it’d take about an hour and a half. And that was with the benefit of his unlimited stamina. No thanks. He’d rather not deal with that.

The grave was right where he’d left it.

Granted, it was less of a grave and more of a small boulder he’d carried over and dropped on the ground half a mile from the road, but the sentiment still stood.

It was too dark to make out anything on the stone. Regardless, that didn’t matter to him; he knew the thing like the back of his hand. Better, actually, considering his hand was bandaged 90% of the time and he hated looking at any part of his body for more than 5 seconds.

He ran his finger along the rough surface. In the center, his own name, amateurly etched into the rock during a particularly bad break in 2000. The grave was oddly clean, save for some moss creeping up the bottom and dried blood on the side.

A face peaked out from behind the other side of the grave, and Michael heaved a sigh.

“You know, I’d kill you if I could.”

The little boy nodded.

“Like, throw you off a cliff, or something. Maybe I’ll try the old classic and stab you.”

He remained unperturbed, staring at her.

“I’ll set you on fire. It’ll hurt, a lot.”

The foxy mask covered up any expression that the boy was making.

“Why won’t you leave me alone?” She groaned, turning away. “You’re not real. I know you’re not real. It’s just my luck that alongside my dead brother and sister, I’m being haunted by my bratty younger self.”

[I’m not a brat,] the boy insisted. They both knew it was a lie.

“You’re a brat who bullies his younger brother because you’re too much of a pussy to admit you’re jealous of the guy. You think it makes you cool how you hate your family, and you brag about it to your bitch friends who’ll abandon you, rightfully so, when you kill CC. You’re going to spend your 13th birthday alone because you’re a murderer just like Father.”

[It was an accident! I just wanted- It was just a prank! I didn’t know it would go wrong-]

“Oh, shut the fuck up.” She snapped. The boy, for once, didn’t whine or complain. “You know what I’d do if I could go back in time?”

Silence.

“I’d kill you. And then I’d kill father. I wouldn’t kill Mum— she doesn’t deserve that— but I would give her a punch in the face for good measure. I’d make sure Liz and CC moved in with the Emilys, where they’d actually be cared for. Wouldn’t that be nice?”

[...You’re not a better person because you hate yourself, you know?] The boy said, and now he was 5, clutching onto a Foxy plushie he’d gotten for his birthday.

“I know,” Michael replied. She knew. This was not him trying to atone; No, he'd been doing that for his whole life, in the security room and in class and before CC had even died. The self-loathing was just a natural byproduct of being a terrible person.

“Dad,” Mike said, with Foxy in one hand and a worksheet in the other, “Can you- can you help me with this sum-”

“Michael, what are you doing with that thing?” William asked, a look of clear disapproval on his face.

“It's… It's Foxy. You made it for me-”

“Mike, you're 9 years old. you're not a child anymore.” William reached over, grabbing the plush from his hands.

“Wait, but-”

“Michael. Don't talk back to me.” His dad snapped. He wilted, lips pursed. “I'm giving it to CC.”

He wanted to complain, ‘But CC already has his Fredbear!’, but he knew better than to test dad’s patience. He just glared at the 3-year old with the force of a thousand suns.

Michael sat down and leaned against the grave. He wished he could cry.

What a hypocrite.

[imtooscaredforthis]

Antagonist

Chapter Eighteen: Lost

Mentions of: Drug use, Arguments, Fighting, Mild Violence, and Slight Homicidal Tendencies, etc.

A/N: Lots of drama in this chapter…Enjoy!!

Tags: @vandeaad @dead-bxxxtch-walking @mama-miya @moonshineinasippycup @prettycutebunny

You stood in the closet, frozen, while the rest of the legion stared at you. They stared at you for a long couple of seconds that felt like an eternity, before Julie finally moved. She turned to face Frank, glaring at him. “What is she doing here?”

“I have no idea. I don’t even know who that is.” He played dumb, only making things worse. “Bullshit.”

She hissed, grabbing you by the hem of your tank top and pulling you out from the closet. She leaned over and sniffed you, before shoving you away, causing you to stumble backwards slightly.

“You’ve been smoking with her. What the fuck, Frank?” She snapped.

“What’s the big deal? I’m an adult, Jules. I can hang out with whoever I want. And if you’re concerned about cheating or whatever, we’re hardly even friends.”

For some reason, you felt a slight sting at his words. You don’t know why. You’re the one that insisted that you weren’t friends..so why does it hurt? Why do you even care?

She rolled her eyes, groaning to herself. “We’ll talk about this later.” Then she turned to you. “I thought Susie made it clear that we don’t want anything to do with you, you dumb bitch. Stay the fuck away and mind your own buisness.”

You should just agree with her. It would make things so much easier, and maybe you could even get out of here alive..but your anger and pride got in the way.

“I wasn’t even trying to get into your business. Frank was the one who wanted to hang out with me in the first place. And you know what? I don’t blame him. If I was stuck with a psychotic controlling bitch, I’d want to get away too.”

It was quiet for a moment, nothing to be heard but Joey swearing under his breath in fear. Both boys knew that what happened next couldn’t be good, but neither wanted to get in the middle of it. She slapped you across the face, so hard that your cheek turned red. And that was when you decided that this bitch needed to be put down.

You’ve gotten into plenty of fights, no thanks to your awful temper. Most of the time, you’re fighting a guy. Sometimes you win, depending on their physicality. You’ve fought plenty of girls too, so much that it’s practically become second nature.

You shoved her against the wall, punching her jaw and her stomach, making her double over. She was only down for a few seconds, before she stood back up, even more enraged. You moved to hit her, but she grabbed your wrist, digging her nails into your skin, and drawing blood.

“Fucking psycho!” You seethed, tearing your arm from her grip. She grabbed your hair, slamming your head against the wall. “Stay away from my boyfriend and my friends, you stupid slut! Or I’ll fucking kill you!”

She continued smacking and scratching at you, the blows causing your lip to bleed. You tackled her to the ground, straddling her, hitting her hard. You continued punching, and punching, until your knuckles were bloodied, and her face was bruised.

You wanted her to stop. You wanted her to leave you alone. You hated her. You wanted her to die.

The next thing you knew, Frank and Joey were pulling you off of her, shouting at you, asking you what your problem was. “Did you not see what just happened? She attacked me! Fuck you, Frank. Fuck you for putting me in the middle of this. I can’t believe I thought I could trust you. I can’t believe I thought we could be friends.”

You shoved him away and stormed out, your body shaking from the adrenaline. You trudged out to a nearby locker, outside the lodge, taking a seat against it. You panted softly, your hands trembling, and your head throbbing in pain. To your surprise, someone had followed you.

“_______?” It was Susie. Her voice was quiet and concerned. You gazed up at the pinkette. “If you want to yell at me for hurting Julie, get it over with. But your other friends covered it pretty well.”

“I wasn’t going to do that. I…I brought you some ice.” She handed you the pack, letting you press it against your bruised and scratched face.

“Why are you being nice to me? I thought you hated me. And I just tried to kill your friend. I wanted to kill her..Fuck, what’s wrong with me?” You groaned.

“You were just defending yourself. I know Frank and Julie can be manipulative assholes, and I was a jerk too. So, I’m sorry. I’ve been wanting to apologize for a while, I just haven’t known how to say it.”

“I’m sorry too. I know you aren’t my sister. You just…you remind me of her so much. I shouldn’t have treated you like that. You’re your own person, and you make your own choices. You choose who you hang out with. You have your own life, and it’s none of my business. I just wanted to look out for you, that’s all.” You admitted.

You were both quiet for a moment, before you spoke again. “So, we’re all good?”

“Yeah, we’re good. You probably shouldn’t come back here again, though.” She remarked, making you laugh. “Yeah, you don’t have to worry about that.”

Suddenly, Joey called out to Susie, making her freeze and curse under her breath. “I have to go. Do you think you’ll be okay by yourself?”

“I’ll be fine.” You reassured her. While you were mildly disoriented, and pretty sure you had a concussion, you’ve had much worse than this. You would be fine. You needed the time alone to think, anyways.

So, after you said your goodbyes, you headed off to the woods, and back to the campfire. While it was nice to have Susie back, you were still determined to get out of here, and you were going to do it, with or without Frank’s help.

–

You were watching the flames from the campfire flicked hypnotically, deep in thought, when someone approached you. “Are you alright?”

It was Leon, a concerned look dawned upon his handsome features. “Oh, uh, yeah, I’m fine. Just got back from a shitty trial, heh.”

“I can help patch you up, if you’d like.” He offered. “Oh, um, sure. Thanks.”

He popped open a medkit, disinfecting your scratches and putting bandaids on them. He even helped patch up your lip. “So, who was your killer?”

“The legion.” You replied. He let out a huff of empathy and irritation. “They suck.”

“Yeah, they really do.”

“Leon, I need to talk to you.” One of his friends called him. You think his name is Chris? He’s new, but he knows Leon. You heard that they worked together, or something like that.

Chris gave you a small nod, and Leon flashed you an apologetic smile, before moving away. You watched as the two left, before letting out a long sigh. You really do have a lot to think about.

[clumsiestgiantess]

It’s story time once again! I can finally release this AU for the other-world universe, the Roommates AU!

This time, Alexis and Erica live in the same world — the same apartment! They're even the same size! But not for long…

————— Alexis POV —————

Erica had told me she was finally breaking up with John at least three or four days ago, so why did I find him in our apartment, rummaging around though our stuff like he’d lost something?  I’d just come home from work to find Erica’s supposed ex-boyfriend in our living room.  Stranger still, Erica herself was nowhere to be seen.  She wouldn’t leave him alone here — not in a million years.

"What are you doing?" I asked him demandingly.  John shot up from the floor in surprise, nearly slamming his head on the coffee table he’d been looking under.  What could he possibly be searching for?  Something to blackmail Erica with again?  I told her to cut him off the last time he’d pulled some stupid shit like that.  Or maybe.. had Erica stolen something of his to get revenge?  I have to admit, that is something she would do. 

"I left one of my uh.. things in here," he responded absentmindedly, gaze still sweeping the floor.  "Your fucking bitch of a roommate just left me out of the blue, and won’t let me even see her anymore, so I'm trying to get it back."  I glared at John as he returned to his search.  I know she’s far from the best, but Erica still seems like a pretty decent person to me. 

"Did you break in? How did you get in here?" I pressed. He shrugged, distracted.  "I have a spare key."  Indeed he did.  It was sitting on the counter in the kitchen.  Stepping further into my apartment, I snatched it up and stormed back over to the door.  "Alright, enough searching.  Whatever Erica stole from you I'll make her give it back.  But you need to get out now."  John huffed, "I'm not leaving until I find it!"  "Yes, you are," I shot back, "Or I'm calling the cops."  This muffed him a bit.  He slowly stood up and gave me a nasty look as he slid out the door.  "Fine.  She's stuck like that anyways," John grumbled, "Have fun dealing with Erica.  She's your problem now."  He slunk off down the hall, disappearing into the elevator. 

Once he was gone, I let out a breath of relief.  I've never met John before — Erica had only told me stories — but he was one sketchy dude.  Who knows how Erica had even fallen for him in the first place.

After bolting the door up tight, I sighed and put down my things.  Erica isn’t home; I'm guessing she's off somewhere where she knows she can avoid John entirely.  I ordered takeout for dinner and ate in my room.  With midterms coming up, I have a lot of work to do.  Most likely, I'll be staying up all night to get everything done.  I drowned out the rest of the world for a while and got down to business, besides a few breaks in between.  

However, when I finally decided to call it quits for the night, I realized it was two o'clock in the morning.  Double-checking the living room and Erica's room, I found that she hadn't come back yet.  Where is she?  Hopefully John hadn't found her.  Something about his attitude suggested that he wouldn't be too understanding towards her if he did.  There was a soft early morning silence settling over everything, growing more empty as I sat in the living room in thought.  I was in the middle of an internal debate on whether I should go out and look for my missing roommate, when I heard a small noise break the silence.

For a while I convinced myself it was the AC or something similar, but as I strained my ears to listen, I realized the noise sounded like soft crying.  I stood in shock and the noise ceased.  It sounded like it was coming from behind the cabinet and the TV.  Maybe it was someone in the neighboring apartment.  Stepping forward quietly, I put one ear to the wall and listened intently.  No matter how I strained my ears to listen, the sound was gone.  My gaze fell downward in defeat — eyes tiredly glazing right over the thing lying on the floor.  I was halfway down the hall, getting ready to just call it a night and go to bed, when my brain finally seemed to process what I saw. 

I gasped, racing back over to the cabinet.  There, in the small space between the television stand and the floor, was a glue trap.  Something fairly large was stuck on it, lying down, most likely dead.  "What the hell is that?" I whispered, pushing back the stand slightly.

At my movements, the creature in the trap thrashed about, causing me to flinch backwards.  Oh hell no.  I'm not dealing with a giant rat.  I rushed to the kitchen and grabbed an empty moving box and some rubber cleaning gloves.  Inching carefully towards the trap, I picked it up at the very edge of the corner and quickly threw it into the box, slamming the top shut.  "Ha!  Gotcha!" I shouted, relieved I hadn't accidently freed the awful creature.  At the same time, a shriek rang out from the box.  Wow, who knew rats could scream like that?  

I held the top tightly closed, slipped on my sandals, and headed outside.  Taking the fire exit, which has no alarm, I stepped into the lot behind the apartment complex and quickly tossed the trap outside.  I'd almost retreated back through the door before I heard a desperate cry that stopped me dead in my tracks.  "Wait!  Please!  It's me!  It's Erica!  Don't throw me out!  Come back!"  I whirled around in the doorway.  Why did she sound so far away?  "Erica?" I called, "Is that you?  Where.. are you?"  "Yes!  Yes, it's me!  I'm right here!  I'm in the glue trap!"

She's.. what?  Slowly, I stepped over to the trap, which had landed rightside up on the pavement.  Upon closer inspection, the thing I'd thought was a rat at a distance in the early morning darkness seemed to be something else entirely.  I knelt in front of the glue trap, staring down in awe at the tiny form of my roommate stuck sideways to the trap's surface.  A knot formed in my stomach as I slowly lifted it to see her.  Erica lay looking fearfully up at me, struggling slightly in the glue that stuck fast to everything that touched the piece of plastic.  

"Woah," I breathed, "You..  You're tiny!"  Erica whimpered, "Please.  I don't know what happened to me, but I'm realy fucking scared.  I'm begging you, don't leave me out here!"  "A- Alright."  I could barely get that single word out, that’s how shocked and utterly confused I was.�� Keeping the plastic plate as balanced as I could, I stood up and made my way back to our apartment in stunned silence.  Once I was inside, I placed the trap on top of the kitchen counter beside the sink.

What should I do with her?  I guess the first thing would be to get her out of all that glue, I answered myself.  Turning on the sink, I grabbed a hand soap dispenser and picked up the trap.  I didn’t have anything else to free her with, so water and soap would have to do.  Erica yelped in surprise as she was drenched in water from the kitchen sink.  "Hey!  What do you think you're doing?" she cried indignantly.  "I'm.. getting you out of there," I replied, brain working in slow motion.  "Now hold still." 

Lathering my hands with soap, I began scrubbing around the edges of Erica's tiny body.  She dealt with it for the most part, but once I started working near her head, she panicked.  I watched dumbfounded as Erica thrashed in the trap.  I guess I could've been a bit more considerate, but I was too mesmerized by a person so small that I didn't think twice about it.

After repeatedly dousing her in soap and water, I finally managed to peel Erica's squirming form off the plastic board.  She slid around in the soapy palm of my hand, trying to get out.  I tried to tighten my grip on her, but my hands were too slippery.  Erica fell out with a yelp into the half-full sink below.  The basin must be pool-size to her.  A few seconds passed and Erica had yet to come up for air.  That's when my brain finally caught up with the situation at hand, and I remembered a cheezy get-to-know-you game our friends made us play when we first moved in together.  One fact about Erica: she can't swim.

Immediately I reached into the sink, feeling around for her small body.  My brain had switched from half-dead to overreactive in less than a second. Moments later, my fingers brushed something warm and I hoisted it out.  I held Erica fearfully; she wasn't moving.  I was terrifyingly close to trying to perform CPR when she suddenly sprung back to life.  Erica coughed up water all over my hand, but I could care less so long as she was alive.  Slowly, she lifted her head to look up at me, wet hair plastered to the sides of her head, eyes wide with terror.  

"Don't kill me," she said weakly, shifting backwards in my hand.  "What?" I asked, confused.  "I'm not going to kill you.  Why would I do that?"  "I don't know!" she cried, "Why are you trying to kill me?  I-"  She paused to cough up a bit more water and I cringed.  "Aren't I your friend?  Is John making you do this to me?  To torture me?"  My mouth dropped slack.  'She's stuck like that anyways.  Have fun dealing with Erica.  She's your problem now.'  John did this to her?  How!?  Why!?  Oh my god, she was what he was looking for on the floor!  What was he planning to do to her?  Shrink her down and kidnap her?  Keep her like some kind of pet?  I shuddered, relieved Erica had managed to get away from him.  Thankfully I'd gotten home a bit early.  If I hadn't stopped him, he might have snuck away with her in his pocket and I never would've known.

Slowly, I lowered Erica down to the counter.  Her pathetic wet form inched backwards away from me as far as she dared, stopping a ways before the sheer drop of the opposite edge of it.  "I'm so sorry, Erica.  I- I forgot you couldn't swim.  I swear I'm not trying to kill you or hurt you or take advantage of you.  I just wanted to get you out of that trap, but I think I was too stunned.  It was like my brain was on autopilot. I just couldn’t process.. this."  

I paused, waiting for her to say something, but she didn't.  "Erica, what happened to you?  Did John do this somehow?"  My tiny roommate started shaking, tears rolled down her face.  She began to say something, but only a sob came from her mouth.  I watched sympathetically as she balled up on the counter, crying into her arms.  I let her be for a while, not wanting to upset her any further. 

The whole time she sobbed, I sat heavily on the couch in the connected living room, anxiously hoping I hadn’t frightened Erica too horribly.  As soon as she finished sobbing, I handed her a small piece of tissue.  Erica flinched away from me before noticing what I had and snatched it from my fingers.

Once she calmed down a bit, I pulled up a chair in front of the counter.  "Are you alright?"  "N- no.  But I guess I could be worse."  I nodded, thinking back to everything she must've been through.  Erica had to run and hide from her ex at a fraction of her size, got caught in a glue trap, I'd come and nearly left her outside, and now she'd almost drowned in the sink because of me.  Of course she’s scared of me.

"Erica."  She flinched and looked up at me with red-rimmed eyes.  "I meant what I said earlier.  I won't hurt you.  We are still friends, I promise."  "John shrank me," she whimpered.  "I know, Erica.  It's alright.  You'll be safe with me."  "But this won't last forever, right?  There has to be some way to lift this curse!"  John's parting words played through my head yet again.  She's stuck like that anyways.  "Yeah, I'm sure there's some magic-y thing we can do to reverse it," I said optimistically.  “He got you this way, so we can probably undo it the same way.”  "What happens until then?"  "I guess you'll have to stay in the apartment until you either grow back, or we find a way to lift the curse."

The room was dead silent for the longest time.  I almost fell asleep in my chair before Erica finally spoke again.  "I'm scared."  Tears crept at the edges of her voice.  "I don't want to be small forever."  "You won't be," I assured her.  Hesitantly, I lifted a hand towards her.  She stared warily at it, then me, but didn’t say anything.  I moved forward, letting the side of my hand rest on the counter beside her. In small careful movements, I curled her little tucked-up body against my palm with my fingers.  I wanted to hug her, but that was the closest thing I could offer.  Her breath hitched with sobs, but she leaned heavily against me, clinging to my palm.

After several long moments, Erica’s stomach growled hungrily, and I realized that she hadn't eaten dinner.  I ate my meal alone in my room earlier; Erica had already been shrunk for about an hour by then.  Scared, small, starving.. poor thing.  But she’s not just a ‘thing’, she’s my roommate — my friend.  It was insane to think about.  Erica, normally so strong and fearless, was suddenly a cowering mess with the removal of five feet of her height.  Though I guess I would be too in that situation.  “Here, I’ll get you something to eat,” I offered, gently sliding my hand away from her.  “What do you want for dinner?”  

Erica smiled slightly, grateful that despite everything, I still tried to treat her like nothing had changed.  I’d saved some leftovers from my meal for breakfast tomorrow, so I took them back out of the fridge and warmed it back up.  Her meal consisted of exactly four noodles and a small piece of chicken, yet she still hadn’t finished it.  Something about her tiny little bites of food made me smile.  It was so damn cute.  While she ate, Erica suddenly looked up and squinted at me.

“Why are you looking at me like that?”  I quickly turned away, “I- No reason.”  She chuckled, finishing up her meal while I stepped away to get ready for bed.  Once I came back, I found Erica pacing back and forth on the counter.  “Is something wrong?" I asked worriedly, "Well, other than the obvious?”  “I can’t even get down from the counter, how am I going to get all the way to my bed?”  “I could take you there,” I offered, holding out my cupped hands on the countertop.  She looked them over dubiously.  “You’re not going to grab me again, are you?  That’s scary, you know.  I couldn’t stop you if you tried to hurt me again.”  “Erica, I’m not trying to hurt you.  I’ll keep my hands perfectly flat the whole time if that makes you feel better.”  “Ok,” she said decisively, slowly stepping up to my fingers.

Butterflies flitted through my stomach as Erica’s little form pressed into my hand.  Her small weight settled evenly in the center of my palms.  She glanced back at me nervously, head tilted all the way up to see me.  “Just please don’t drop me,” she begged quietly.  I could feel her fingers dig into my skin to steady herself while I carefully walked her through our apartment to her room.  I gently placed her down on one of her pillows and pulled a blanket up so she could get beneath it.  “Goodnight, Erica,” I called, heading towards the door.  “Alexis, wait!”  I turned in the doorway, looking back at her tiny body sitting squarely on a single pillow.  “Yes?”  “I.. umm..  I have to use the bathroom.”  My face grew hot.  “Oh, I’ll, uh.. I guess I’ll have to take you, huh?”  “Yeah..”

I awkwardly came back over to her bedside and let her step up into my hands.  We silently crossed the hall to the bathroom, where I stood hesitantly in the doorway.  “So.. how are we going to do this?”  Erica shifted in my hand.  “I.. Well..” she stammered, “I can’t use the toilet..  What if.. I use the sink instead?”  I placed her down on the counter and looked her over.  Her face was beet red in embarrassment.  I tore up a single square of toilet paper and placed it down next to her. “I’ll be outside the door.  Call me whenever you’re done and I’ll take you back to bed, alright?” 

Erica nodded, turning quickly away from me as she buried her face in her hands.  After a few minutes waiting by the bathroom door, I heard Erica yell for me.  She was standing at the bottom of the sink when I came in.  Again, I offered her my hands and she climbed back on.  Putting her back in bed a second time, I bid her goodnight and headed to bed myself.  Who knew what tomorrow would bring?  At the very least, Erica would be safe.

————— Erica POV —————

All night I tossed and turned in my bed.  I just couldn’t get any sleep.  Everything was dangerous to me at my new size, and if it wasn’t dangerous, it was embarrassing.  I had to be helped to the bathroom and carried around like a little kid!  It was fucking humiliating!  But it could’ve been so so much worse.  I didn’t want to even think about what might’ve happened if John had caught me. 

Thankfully my roommate, Alexis, had recognized my voice when she did.  It was terrifying to be in her grasp; her fingers could easily bear down on me at any moment to end my life, or just hold me down.  You’re friends, I reassured myself, she wouldn’t hurt you.  Even so, she almost drowned me, albeit by mistake.  I don’t like being so small; it makes me feel awful and vulnerable.  I hate that I have to be handled by Alexis all the time, consistently trusting her with my life.  However, I would probably be dead without her, so I guess I do trust her with it.

She kicked John out before he could get to me.  If he’d looked just a little further past the coffee table to the cabinet where the tv stood, he would’ve found me.  A frightened wheeze escaped my throat just thinking about it.  It must’ve been something in my drink.  The second I downed that shot glass I felt tingly.  One minute I was at my own height, the next I was staring up at the couch.  As I fled, John threatened me with awful stuff — from caging me up to harming me for every bad thing I said about him, and that was a lot of things.

Even if I’d managed to hide until he gave up — which was super unlikely — I would still be stuck in that glue trap, that I stumbled onto while trying to get away. I hadn’t called out to Alexis earlier because of that.  I didn’t know how she’d react if she found me, and I was stuck, unable to run away if things went south.  I’ve barely known Alexis for a year.  What if she was secretly awful and took advantage of my size?  Thankfully she isn’t.  She treated me kindly, for the most part, and reassured me that everything would be alright when I broke down in fear.  Though she is slightly terrifying from my tiny perspective, I do feel safer with her around.  

Nightmarish thoughts filled my head as I lay in the dark.  My bed now seemed to stretch on for miles in front of me, vast and open and daunting.  By morning, I was exhausted.  From my room, I could hear Alexis getting up for the day.  It's Saturday, but she still has work.  Alexis came in to check on me after a while, stepping softly over to me before realizing I was already awake.

"Did you get any sleep last night?" she asked, sitting on the edge of my bed.  I shook my head, "I couldn't."  She sighed; her breath sounded like a gale-force wind at my small size.  "Alright, I have to go to work soon, but I'll make you some breakfast and leave you on the counter before I go."  "You're leaving me here?  Alone?" I asked, skeptical.  "Well, I can't take you around outside.  It's way too risky.  Just stay here.  The door's locked-"  "But John can get in!" I cried, "He has a spare key!  He'll kidnap me!"  Alexis shook her head and smiled slightly, "He used to have a spare key.  Now, I have it right here in my pocket.  You'll be fine, Erica."  I grumbled at my predicament.  Going outside would probably be extremely overwhelming, though.  "Ok," I sighed, "I guess I'll stay here."

Just as she said, Alexis made me a microwave waffle for breakfast and left me on the counter beside it.  "I'll be back before you know it," she told me on her way out the door.  "Yeah right," I muttered, chowing down on the oversized food in front of me.  Only a few hours later, I was practically dying of boredom.  "Ugh, why didn't I ask Alexis to leave my phone with me before she left?"  I hadn't had my phone on me when I shrank, so it would be TV-size compared to me, but it would still be some form of entertainment.  

I'll go get it then, I thought to myself, just because I'm small doesn't mean I'm helpless.  I peered over the edge of the counter to the floor below me.  If I jumped onto the cushion of a bar stool, then I could slide down one of its legs to the floor.  This was easier said than done, as it turns out.  When I finally worked up the courage to jump down, I hit the cushion with enough force to bounce back off it.  I was nearly thrown off the seat entirely.  

Falling onto the tile floor from this high up would certainly break a few of my bones, or if I fell in the right spot, it would just flat-out kill me.  I decided to be a bit more careful the rest of the way down.  Once I got to the floor, I was finally able to look around my apartment without being bombarded by a giant.  Er, well, technically I'm just really small and everyone else is normal, but in my perspective, everything was giant.  It was fascinating, seeing the apartment at such a massive scale.  All of our things suddenly looked a hell of a lot more impressive.

I wandered around the floors, making my way to the living room.  My phone was still sitting on the coffee table where I'd left it.  Now, how do I get up there?  Aha!  There was a fake houseplant across from the table, potted in a woven basket that was perfect for climbing.  If I could make the jump, then that phone would be mine.  I avoided the vent in the floor in front of the plant as I neared it.  I'd pulled it open a day ago because I dropped my earring down there, and it was still sitting wide open like a gaping chasm. 

Scaling the basket was easy, but the jump suddenly seemed a lot further from the top.  Alright, here goes nothing.  I took a running leap at the table, but my foot caught in one of the basket's woven loops I'd used to climb up.  Jerked backwards by my leg, I screamed as I plummeted down to the floor below.

Fortunately, it was carpeted, so the impact wasn't horribly painful.  Unfortunately, I rolled right off the carpet and kept falling.  That time I hit the ground hard.  I cried out in pain, grasping the arm I'd fallen on.  Looking up in terror, I realized where I'd fallen.  I was in the vent.  Ok, ok, don't panic.  When Alexis comes back, you can call her and she'll get you out.  Everything'll be fine. 

Were there bugs down here?  I sincerely hoped there weren't.  Time seemed to stretch on even slower than it had when I was waiting on the counter.  Why did I have to try some stupid shit like this?  I saw the vent right in front of that houseplant.  I knew this was here, dammit!  

While I mulled in the metal tube beneath the floor, I was startled by a low rumble.  Tremors started beneath my feet and I had about a split second to realize what was happening.  Oh no, the AC!  I was flung backwards by a blast of cold air, trying desperately to hold onto something, but the tube's sides were slick, and I slid backwards in the direction of the wind.

"No!  Wait!" I cried out as I was swept away from the opening, "Alexis!  Somebody!  Help!"  The force of the AC bashed me into wall after wall, violently dragging me further away from my only way out.  By the time it stopped, I had no clue where I was.  Immediately, claustrophobia set in.  There was nothing but darkness and metal piping all around me.  What's worse, I'm at a cross-section, and I have no idea what direction I'd come from.  I let out a cry of despair.  "I'm going to starve down here!" I whimpered, "I'm going to die here and not even Alexis will know what happened to me!"  

I sat and sobbed until I'd run out of tears.  I'm already desperately thirsty, but I have nothing to drink.  I'll probably dehydrate before I starve — unless, of course, I find an exit.  Solemnly, I picked a direction, and started walking.  There were vents through multiple apartments.  I could survive if I managed to make it out.  At this point, whose apartment doesn't even matter to me.

Exhausted, dirty, and in pain, I wandered aimlessly through the vent, searching for any openings.  It was dingy and almost pitch dark in here.  It's probably the most scared I've ever been in my life.  Actually, second most scared.  Being shrunk will likely always be my scariest memory.  

It felt like I'd been walking for ages, but I finally, finally, found a grate.  I scrambled towards the light in relief.  It was a vertical grate, meaning I could walk right through to freedom.  I jogged to the opening, throwing myself against the vent cover until it fell off.  I lay there panting as I celebrated my escape from the hellish labyrinth I'd been trapped in.  "Woah..  What are you?"  Huh?  

The thunderous sound of footsteps rumbled in my ears.  Suddenly, giant fingers gripped my torso and dragged me into the air, where I came face to face with a little girl.  She was probably six or seven at the most, but she was still terrifyingly huge.

"Let me go!" I cried the moment I could catch my breath, "I'm a person!  Put me down!"  The little girl placed me back onto the floor and I scrambled away from her.  "Are you sure you're a person?" she asked me confusedly as I tried to get my bearings, "Cuz you kinda look like a doll."  I froze, eyes widening in fear.  The little girl reached out for me again, but I quickly ducked out of her reach.  "Yes!  I'm very sure I'm a person.  I shrunk.  I'm not supposed to be this small."  I watched warily as the girl looked at me in fascination.  Slowly, her gaze shifted behind me to my right and I followed it.  She was staring thoughtfully at a massive dollhouse.  Oh fuck this.  I ran for the vent, but I was snatched up before I could get there.

"No!  No!  Let me go!  I'm not a doll!  LET ME GO!"  I gasped in pain as the little girl's grip tightened on me, crushing into my already bruised ribs.  Alexis had grabbed me before, but I hadn't realized how gentle she'd been.  I felt like my lungs were on fire; I couldn't even breathe!  An agonizing few seconds passed before I was dropped into the dollhouse.  It was horrifying how quickly a sweet little girl suddenly became my jailer.  I glared at her, seething as she placed more dolls beside me.  

"LET ME GO RIGHT NOW YOU PINT SIZED LITTLE SHIT!  I TOLD YOU I'M A PERSON!  A PERSON, YOU HEAR ME!?  YOU BETTER LET ME GO RIGHT NOW OR I'LL-"  My rant was interrupted by someone at the door.  A guy about my age, maybe a bit younger, stepped in looking slightly confused.  "Kate, what's going on in here?"  Before I could so much as think about calling for help, the little girl, Kate, grabbed me tightly.  Her thumb pressed over my mouth, stopping any attempt for me to speak.

"Nothing, Ivan!  I'm just playing with my dolls” she replied sweetly.  I desperately thrashed about, trying to break out of Kate's grasp, but I was well-hidden behind her back.  If I could just get my mouth free, I could call out to that guy for help.  He's definitely old enough to realize I'm not some toy.  However, as I tried to wriggle free, Kate's grip tightened again.  I let out a muffled scream of pain as my head was slowly crushed from the sides.  My vision started getting spotty with dark patches.  

"Huh, I thought I heard someone yelling," Ivan remarked.  Yes!  You did!  I'm right here!  Please see me!  To my dismay, he shrugged and turned to leave.  I had to get out, but Kate still had a vice-like grip on my skull, and she wasn't letting up.  If I stayed here much longer, I feared my head would quite literally burst.  Yanking my jaws open beneath her skin, I bit down as hard as I could.  Kate let out a scream and I was immediately released.

I gasped in pain and my head throbbed, making my vision blur in hazy doubles.  "I knew something was going on in here!"  Ivan had returned.  "Kate, what are you-"  His voice fell short; he must've seen me crawling my way to the vent.  "What is that thing!?  Did it bite you?  Katie, you can't hold wild animals, you could get sick if they bite you!"  No, not again.  This is the second time now that I've been mistaken for a weird animal.  Pushing myself onward, I scrambled back into the vent, flinching as something slammed into the floor a few inches away from me.  

"Get back here!" I heard Ivan yell, almost sounding desperate.  I turned to find him getting on his hands and knees.  He can still reach me here!  I have to get deeper!  With all the strength I had left, I dragged myself further into the vent.  "Wait.. what the..?"  I tilted my head just slightly to catch Ivan's stunned reaction.  He must've finally realized that I wasn't a feral rat.  "Hold on, come back!  You.. you're a person!" his arm shot into the vent after me.   I shrieked, terrified of being grabbed agian, and threw myself around a corner in the ventilation.

"Wait!" I heard Ivan call, "I can help you!  Come back!"  No, no, no, no, and no.  I'm getting the hell out of here while I still can.  I kept going until I couldn't hear the guy calling for me anymore.  Again, I felt as though I were going to die here.  This time I might just die of my injuries.  My head felt like it was split wide open, and my lungs still burned painfully.  Alexis should be home by now, I realized with a pang of sorrow.  She's probably searching all over our apartment for me right now.  I silently begged her to come find me, but I knew it was impossible for her to reach me here, even if she did miraculously know where I was.  To add insult to injury, the AC came back on, and at this point I was too exhausted to try and fight it.  I curled up as tightly as I could without too much pain from my ribs, and let myself be dragged around the vents again.

When the wind subsided, I slowly pulled myself up to find that the tube was backlit by sunlight.  I turned to find that I'd been thrown into another vertical grate.  By this time, I was desperate and a little delirious.  I fought my way into another apartment.  It was much more modern and blissfully quiet.  Whoever lives here must be still at work, thank god.  

I trudged over to the kitchen; I needed food and water badly.  Maybe if I was lucky, I might find some crumbs on the floor.  I laughed in my delirium, "Maybe I am a feral rat after all!"  I could barely see straight, but somehow I managed to find a pool of water close to the floor.  My muscles gave out and I let myself fall in.  It wasn't deep enough for me to drown, so I sat back and started drinking.  I gulped as much water as I could, gasping and choking on it as I went.  Once I was full, I collapsed in the shallow water.  

It took me some time to recover, but when I did, rational thoughts came back to me.  Wait.. where the hell am I?  I sat up slowly, rubbing the water from my eyes only to freeze as my heart nearly flew out of my chest.  I was sitting in a water bowl for a pet.  Said pet was sitting in front of me, gazing curiously at me with round, dilated pupils.  A cat.  Well, I'm dead.  It didn't make a move for me, not even as I slowly stood up to run.  Was it possible for me to outrun a cat at this size?  I guess I'm about to find out.  

At once I made a mad dash for the edge of the water bowl.  However, I hadn't accounted for the friction of the knee-deep water I stood in.  Jaws clamped around me faster than I expected.  I screamed and thrashed in a pathetic attempt to survive whatever awful fate awaited me.  The cat held me tight, trotting to the center of the kitchen with my sad tiny form hanging from its mouth.  It lay down, dropping me on the floor before pinning me down with its giant paws.  

This is it.  This is how I die.  Sharp thin teeth the size of my forearm gleamed in the fluorescent light as the cat opened its jaws wide.  Then it started tearing at me.  I braced myself, expecting my flesh to be torn off my body in sickening shreds, but the stupid animal wanted to toy with me.  It yanked away small pieces of my clothing, bit by bit.  Sometimes it cut into my skin, but most of the gashes yanked away shreds of fabric.  I silently awaited the moment when I would run out of material between its incisors and my skin.  My body started tingling all over, muscles shaking and quivering.  Was I having a spasm?  Maybe I'd be spared a brutal live mauling and just have a heart attack instead.  Suddenly, the cat was no longer above me.  It yowled and darted away in a panic, claws scrambling on the wooden floor.

All I did was lay and breathe.  I couldn't do much else.  Nothing more happened to me, but I still fought to stay conscious nonetheless.  Eventually, I had the courage to sit up.  The kitchen counter was only a few inches or so above my head.  The wood planks below me were thinner than my hands.  Ecstatic joy swelled through me and I cried in relief.  I had grown back.  Exactly twenty-four death-defying, nightmare-esque hours after I'd shrunk, I grew back.  I sat there simply enjoying my old height and the fact that I didn't have to fight for my life every waking second.  I stood up and gazed dazedly around the strange apartment.  It suddenly looked so much smaller.  The cat was nowhere to be seen.  I would've hunted it down and strangled it had I not remembered my roomate, desperately searching for me back home.

In a moment, I was out the door.  I checked the numbers on the doors in the hall and realized that I was on the floor below our apartment.  Not even bothering to wait for an elevator, I dashed up the stairs and tore down the hall, stopping heavily at my door.  I didn't have the keys to get in, but it didn't matter.  "Alexis!  Alexis, it's me! I-"  The door was thrown open seconds later, and a disheveled Alexis stood in the middle of the doorway, eyes wide.  She sobbed in relief and threw her arms around me, trapping me in a fierce hug.  I sucked in a pained breath of air and she drew backwards in alarm.  "Erica!  What happened to you!?  You- You're hurt!  Your clothes are all torn up and you're filthy!  Where were you?  What happened?"  I started sobbing, and Alexis had to guide me to the couch inside.

I tried to explain everything that had happened between a few relieved sobbs while shoving as much food as I could into my mouth.  Alexis had to forcefully stop me at some point, warning me that I would vomit if I ate any more.  Joke's on her though, I already feel like vomiting.  At the end of my horrible story, Alexis got up off the floor where she'd bandaged the cuts on my arms and legs from being dragged through the vents.  Careful not to jostle any of my numerous ice packs, for all the bruises, she slid onto the couch beside me.  I slowly lay down, resting my head on Alexis' lap.  She held me close, and I clung to her in a half-hug.  Murmuring a quiet 'thank you', I drifted off to sleep knowing that I was safe at last.

[harrywavycurly]

Hello! So the idea of Eddie being with a hairdresser just does things to me and I’m here to see if there’s anyway I could get some conversation things between them?😩

Hiii babes!! Sure you can, I hope these satisfy you, the idea of Eddie dating a hairdresser is just too good not to think about 😂 enjoy!💖

*Eddie knows a lot about hair but what the fuck is a money piece and why do you want to bleach it?*

“Baby please be gentle okay?” “Have I ever hurt you before?” “No…but you’ve got that…that look in your eyes that say you’re about to try to do something wild to my hair…” “French braids aren’t exactly wild Eddie but okay.” “Braids? As in more than one?” “Two to be exact.” “You’re not…you wouldn’t…tell me you wouldn’t.” “Wouldn’t what? Give you braided pig tails? I would and…well I currently am so…too late to stop now I’m halfway done with the first one.” “You’re so fucking lucky I love you.” “Yup so lucky…hair tie please.”

“Please Eddie you’d look so good with it.” “I don’t even know what the hell a money piece is?” “It’s the two little front sections of your hair…these right here…see? I’d just bleach them and then I can color them like blue or green…whatever color you want really the options are endless.” “Bleach my hair? Baby…wait..did you say blue? Like…I’d have blue hair?” “Well just these pieces would be blue and it’d blend in nicely with your dark brown so it wouldn’t be that noticeable…” “and how horrible will I look when it starts to grow out?” “Not bad since your roots are a dark brown and if we go like a dark shade of blue it wouldn’t be too bad…and if you hate it then we just dye it brown.” “If I do this what do I get in return?” “All my love and affection?” “As much as that sounds nice sweetheart…what else do I get?” “Cuddles and your favorite dinner tomorrow night? And I’ll even watch that scary movie with you about the dude with all the pins in his head.” “Ohh you’ll watch hellraiser with me? Deal….but if you try to sneak in any shade of pink onto my hair then no kisses or cuddles for a week.” “Oh please as if you could go a day without a kiss.” “Let’s not have to find out…” “okay okay no pink.”

“What’s this?” “It’s called a scrunchie…you use it to hold your hair up.” “Oh instead of rubber bands?” “You’ve been using rubber bands to put your hair up?” “Yeah…” “i…I can’t stand you sometimes. That’s why you get so mad when you take your hair down then? Because the rubber band rips it all out?” “Yeah those things hurt like a bitch to take out of my hair.” “They have these things called hair ties that are made for using on hair you know that right?” “I know…but I can’t ever find one when I need it so I just improvise…but this scrunchie thing feels nice.” “Come here let me put your hair up with it so you can see how it’s supposed to look.” “It’s pink.” “So? It’ll be in your hair no one will really see it.” “You don’t have any other ones?” “I’ll get you a few other colors at work tomorrow.” “Oh…this looks nice…you can totally see the pink…” “it looks so good!” “Thanks…I have a great hairstylist.”

“Just a shampoo and conditioning treatment?” “Yeah I think I’m good on a trim I got one last week.” “Last week? I didn’t work last week…” “Baby…sweetheart…please don’t try to drown me just because I let someone else trim my hair…” “who did it? Was it Stacy? You let Stacy touch your hair?” “It was Tammy…” “Tammy? Eddie she can’t even do even cuts let alone layers.” “I just had her trim the bangs that’s all the rest I had her leave alone.” “Oh thank god…so you need a trim then?” “No…I’m growing it out.” “I’m gonna give you a trim…just to get the split ends you know those drive me up a wall.” “Fine baby do whatever you want…can I get that stuff put in it that smells like apples?”

[amiharana]

some of my thoughts on link, zelda, and the champions

this post actually started off with me trying to answer the last part of this anon's ask, and then it spiraled into something else, so i'm going to have to make another post about the actual idea 😭 for now, you can have this long-ass fucking thinkpiece i typed up because i love the champions dearly and i wanted a much larger presence from them as i played botw. this post is really long so if you want to read it, please sit down and have a snack while you read.

so the last part of anon's original ask was about the champions singing together and the idea of a found family—

anonymous asked:

Also: imagine all champions, Link and Zelda hanging out on one of the Divine Beasts and singing a song together (i am very weak to champions being a found family)

like you're so #real for this anon. i honestly do hope we get more champions content in TOTK because nintendo completely missed on not expanding on a found family dynamic between link, zelda, and the champions. sure there's the champion's ballad DLC and age of calamity (i haven't played either of these. sorry. i will soon!), but that's not.. they're still dead in the DLC and AoC isn't considered canon i think it's more of an alternative timeline? so that doesn't really count.

me personally i think daruk and urbosa are very mother and father, and they probably were if riju and yunobo are their direct descendants (which is a whole other rabbit hole in itself; urbosa and daruk died most likely leaving little children and spouses behind ㅠㅠ). and maybe that is the point; daruk is the rock (because he's a goron lol) that keeps the family together and in the botw memories is seen to be taking initiative to lead and tell the other champions to get to their divine beasts when the calamity awakens. he’s steadfast and encouraging and jovial and that’s very father of him! as for urbosa, she straight up mothers zelda and link in-game, she's basically zelda's maternal figure after zelda's mom dies. she's not a stepmom, she's the mother that stepped up 💪❤️

mipha bears the Eldest Daughter Curse™ and revali is the moody teenager who’s Not going through a phase, it’s a LIFESTYLE MOM!!!1!1!1!1 and imo link and zelda kinda give goofy twin siblings (imagine like the pine twins) vibes to me

i like the headcanon that link had a younger sister pre-calamity, but i’d like to add my own twist to that. assuming that link used to live in hateno village, what if link's parents split after the birth of his younger sister, with his father taking link and moving closer to hyrule castle to fulfill his duty as a knight, and his mother not wanting to get involved with the war against the calamity and taking his sister to stay in hateno? link must have been really young at the time and barely remembers being able to play with his little sister :( so even if he had a sibling, he was basically raised alone for most of his life. and if his father was a knight of hyrule, i doubt that he could have been the most present father to link either... with zelda's mother dying when she was young and her father being a complete dick, that makes both link and zelda the "only child" kids that were raised in less than desirable familial conditions. and so, i think link and zelda would have their own difficulties integrating into this found family dynamic with the champions.

now i'm not an only child (i have demons for siblings tbh), but i think both link and zelda are very independent people who feel like they can only rely and trust themselves with the way they've been raised. it takes a lot for both of them to learn to be vulnerable and trust others, and they're very much not used to the mismatched deck of personalities they have to deal with within the champions, that being jolly father daruk, very cutthroat mother urbosa, sweet and soft-spoken mipha, and dickhead ass bitch bird revali. how can they navigate through these relationships with their lonely childhoods swept up in prophecies of old? it's much easier than you think and it has to do with anon's idea: strengthening rapport with each other by singing together atop a divine beast >:]

ok i'm joking, i think that's more the apex of the roadmap to becoming a found family, but it's a very cute idea 🥺 after link and zelda are finally cool with each other, there are so many opportunities for each of them to bond with the other champions individually. there's of course zelda falling asleep on mama urbosa in vah naboris, link and daruk have their father-son bonding time by daruk protecting link from getting smashed to a pulp by volcanic boulders, etc etc, but what about mipha taking zelda to all the monuments that detail zora history throughout the domain so that zelda can study them? what about revali teaching link how to use the paraglider so that he can actually hit targets at the flight range and get a chance to finally settle the score between him and link? i actually like that idea a lot, because then we could get an explanation as to why the paraglider even exists in the botw universe (revalink for the win ehehe). nintendo, my dear friend, there could be so much more to this world that you've introduced to us.

on one hand, of course botw is narratively focused on link and zelda and calamity ganon, and mechanically about the open-world map, shrines/divine beasts, etc, that break free from traditional zelda conventions. but it leaves the champions to only be side characters that, though they played critical roles in handling the divine beasts, are nothing more than ghostly figures with a handful of one-dimensional character traits that only create a further disconnect between the current world of hyrule vs. its pre-calamity past. which is why we get champion's ballad and age of calamity, which both somewhat expands on the champions as characters, but never more than giving them a few more traits and interactions that, to me personally, feel empty and inadequate. i want to have these intimate interactions with the champions as characters in the botw map, ones that i can walk up to chat with as though they were sidon or beedle or a random npc traveler. i want to feel close to the champions, and nintendo, though with weak attempts, doesn't give me that.

the picture that purah takes of the champions is so important to me. this right here is peak found family, a group of the most mismatched individuals that somehow meld perfectly together and balance each other out, and we only receive it through the DLC. that's so stupid. sorry nintendo, i want more than three minute long memories of a singular moment in a past life, i want more than npcs telling me who i used to be. i want king dorephan to tell us about the time zelda fell off of a waterfall and mipha immediately jumped after her to save her clumsy ass. i want to look through historical records of the gerudo and find one about urbosa launching daruk at the mouth of a molduking and daruk chewing her out for it later. i want elder kaneli gossip with me about an old rumor about how revali and the hylian champion of the past used to be found asleep together on the floor of the flight range's hut after a long night of training. i want the world of botw to give me signs and stories about how close the champions were with each other and to make my heart ache, to wish desperately to have known them, instead of like, 20 memories that only serve the plot, or honestly don't at all. but i digress!

i know for some people, the presence of the champions were meant to teach link about tragedy and loss and the effect of war and ruin and evil and cherishing your loved ones or whatever, but i simply did not get that message. that was not what i perceived the champions to be, because to me, the game lacked showing the relationships link and zelda had with the champions. like okay, you died and you also happened to know me. what if link doesn't really remember them at all? then what?

you receive twenty or so memories about the champions when including the DLC, and yes i do concede it gives us some more insight about their characters, but it doesn't do much more than that. the cutscene where mipha moves vah ruta to ready its lasers at the castle, where she wishes to see her father and sidon one more time, especially is an excellent example of emphasizing their significance to the people around them, to us as players and spectators to this hyrule... i want more of that.

i could be wrong about some of the stuff i've said, so disclaimer again that i haven't played the DLC or age of calamity, and maybe you do feel closer to the champions when you play those games! fanmade fic and art and headcanons have been really great ways of helping me view them in a multi-dimensional way, but going off the game's content itself, the champions feel like hollow spectres of people we never truly remember or get to know. maybe that's what they're supposed to feel like, but i don't want to feel that way about them. i'm too attached to them now, and i want to get to know them! curse you nintendo!!!

[yikesbin]

13 ways of looking at a fat girl : a review from an actual fat girl

**CW: eating disorders, body image, fat phobia, sexual fetishizing

Mona Awad invented the "fat girl gaze" with this book. Or at least, she put it into words.

I have never felt more seen & understood through a work of fiction in my entire life. I've struggled with body image and its effects on my females friendships since I hit puberty. And although I have never been an actual bitch straight to the faces of my skinny friends, this novel captures a perfect rendition of my internal monologue. Here's some of my thick girl thoughts about some of the themes discussed!

The Fat Girl Sexual Experience™️ :

The fat girl sexual experience is highly discussed throughout most of this book, and it is as similar to real life as it disgustingly could be. Because what is being a fat woman if not constantly being perceived as a piece of meat merely used for fucking? Or maybe it's the constant older-male sexual gratification that seals the deal. Either way, Awad does not shy away from the raw truth that dating as a fat girl is packed with weird fetishizes & the constant stripping of innocence. And something I find that this book does well, is explaining how fat women lean into a sexualized culture. Although that is not a want or a goal for me, it almost feels like I've had to appear from sexual to get any "attention" from men at all. Even if I'm not wanting to be sexual. And if attention is received, it's almost always in a negative, two-toned connotation, because apparently being a woman with boobs means I'm only here to fuck you. You can throw interpersonal communication out the window - my top says "skip the gentleness & just get to work!". So you lean into it. You become a sexual fantasy. At least you're not alone anymore. It's easier this way.

The Fear of Fat Loss :

But then comes after. Awad paints a picture of one my my greatest fears; losing my all my weight & somehow becoming more mad at the world than before.

When scrolling through many weight loss videos online, I often am reminded of how cruel society is, in ways that seem almost ingrained into the start of a person. How people become kinder to you after the weight is gone, or how those around you seem to keep the fat girl you once were in the back of their head. People hold open the door for you now, or they smile at you more.

And then I'm remember that looking at myself after weight-loss would be more grueling that being fat itself. Because you now feel foreign in your own body. You begin to judge others that looked like you at one point, and question how they can live such a happy life when they look like that. I finally got what I wanted, why am I so miserable? The truth is, you are not happy. Because skinniness does not equal happiness. It merely makes shopping easier. And maybe you can feel like you fit in with your friends more. But it's hard to accept yourself as skinny and happy when it took you bitterness & internalized fat phobia to get there. "Congratulations!" they say, and you sit there wondering how strange it is to congratulate someone on their own self-hatred. You are haunted by the fat girl inside.

As a final conclusion, I'll state that these are my opinions based on experiences I felt connected with the topics addressed in this work of FICTION. You don't have to agree, and I don't care if you disagree. Be kind. I'll leave this post with some one my favorite quotes, feel free to analyze them in the comments.

*Content Warning Reminder : eating disorders, body image, fat phobia, sexual fetishizing

“I’d spend hours hunting for something—anything—that would render me moderately fuckable. And if not fuckable, something in which I could grieve over the fact of not being fuckable with unbaubled dignity."

“Later on I'm going to be really fucking beautiful. I'm going to grow into that nose and develop an eating disorder. I'll be hungry and angry all my life but I'll also have a hell of a time.”

“My father has always felt that being fat was a choice. When I was in college I would sometimes meet him for lunch or coffee, and he would stare at my extra flesh like it was some weird piece of clothing I was wearing just to annoy him. Like my fat was an elaborate turban or Mel’s zombie tiara or some anarchy flag that, in my impetuous youth, I was choosing to hold up and wave in his face. Not really part of me, just something I was doing to rebel, prove him wrong."

“There was always that shadowy twin, thin when I was fat, fat when I was thin, myself in silvery negative, with dark teeth and shining white pupils glowing in the black sunlight of that other world." - Margaret Atwood

[mybabydenkikaminari]

Episode 6 (OPLA)

-Luffy’s zoning out because he isn’t available to deal with it 10/10

-”Someone needs to go back to Baratie” “Um, I’m really not hungry right now, Nami”

-Luffy still freaking out, love it

-Zeff complaining about the most stupid things driving nuts poor Sanji (and Zeff doing it on purpose)

-Sanji moving his lip to the “It needs more oregano”, I’m in love your honor

-Sanji also moving immediately to help Luffy, I’M IN LOVE YOUR HONOR

-Zeff using a fish to cure someone and drinking the whiskey instead of using it on the wound, so in character

-Mihawk sitting in Garp’s chair, Queen slay

-Luffy cleaning Zoro’s sword and trying to pronounce his name, cutie

-LUFFY REFUSING FOOD

-Also Sanji cooking in the Going Merry because he wants Zeff to leave him alone (also “Not wasting food” policy always) 

-Luffy trying to decide what is best for his boyf-, I mean friend, just friend

-”Oregano’s for savages” + “I’d rather die than have you season my food” BITCH GET A GRIP

-Also Zeff carrying a bullet belt with species instead of actual bullets

-Love we are doing it the manga way and he eat his own leg

-Luffy “can relate” and Sanji brushing it of

-”I’d eat both arms and legs to save Zoro’s life”

-Nami explaining the story of Jaya arc to Zoro

-Nami being angry to Luffy it’s so on point with her backstory 

-”And I’d do anything to save him”

-Also Luffy I can put myself between someone and his dream is so on point with his backstory too

-Nami’s my dream “It’s for Zoro to not die in my bed”, OH MY, Luffy has it bad but Nami it’s not far behind

-Coby your crush is showing!!!!!! Again btw

-Kind of like a lot Arlong being a boss

-Usopp trying to help Luffy and him open up a little bit about his insecurities, so fucking cuteeee

-”Me?”

-Sanji immediately  moving after hearing that Arlong is going to destroy Baratie if Zeff doesn't turn Luffy over because he knows that he isn’t going to turn over Chore Boy

-Luffy going to protect Baratie because he has a heart of gold 

-Sanji in love look at Luffy when his reason to help is that they fed them (oh no, I’m starting to see the appeal to LuSan too)

-Nami looking at Luffy like she is going to rip his head off because she knows that Arlong is going to kick their asses and she is scared

-I love being expose now to the equality problem with the fishmen because it makes Arlong hate for humans more believable and reasonable (he has no right to kill innocent people anyway though)

-Also makes sense that he is angry at the fishmen that works at Baratie (I am sure that Zeff treats him equally but Arlong doesn’t know or care)

-Buggy’s head in the bag 10/10 (also call out to Zoro who had the same idea in Syrup Village)

-Buggy as usual

-”Sorry, honey” I know that this two are not a thing but the PHRASING

-Zeff still trying to protect his Chore Boy

-Sanji screaming Zeff and kicks 10/10 (even if he gets his ass handed)

-Usopp under the table 10/10

-”Not bad for human” 

-Love the door crashing, Arlong always the dramatic bitch

-Nami’s sad confession to Zoro 10/10

-Nami saving Luffy’s live <3 (she knew that someone would have saved him from the water)

-Not gonna lie I am deeply in love with the design of Arlong’s tattoo

-Sanji taking the time to lose the tie and shirt it’s so in character

-Sanji’s abs, thank you

-Luffy’s heart is breaking

-Garp beloved hat making an appearance

-Koby’s realization that his words had the exact opposite effect (his heart is not handling it well)

-”At least I don’t drown everything in oregano”

-Zeff convincing Sanji that he needs to go follow his dreams in the worst way possible, it doesn’t have the same impact as the manga or anime but I like it  

-”You sure missed a big fight. Those fishmen guys were tough. You would’ve loved it”

-Luffy opening his heart completely to Zoro

-”And now I lost Nami. I lost the Grand Line map. And maybe I will lose you too”

-”I need you, Zoro”

-LUFFY STRADDLING ZORO HIPS WITH HIS OWN. LUFFY KEEPING HIMSELF ON TOP OF HIM PUTTING ONE HAND ON EACH SIDE. LUFFY REPEATING ZORO’S NAME MULTIPLE TIMES IN THAT SAME POSITION. LUFFY THROWING HIMSELF ON TOP OF ZORO’S CHEST AND HUGGING HIM. LUFFY PUTING THE BARE MINIMUM DISTANCE TO THEN CARESS ZORO’S FACE WITH HIS HAND. Oh my god… OH MY GOD! EXCUSE ME?! WHAT?! I HAVE NO WORDS, I AM JUST FUCKING DEAD (I survived the DDoS attack of AO3 but I couldn’t survive these XD)

-”You gonna to keep talking, or let me get some sleep”+”Right now, I’m wishing I was (dead)” Not gonna lie, MOOD

-Zoro hearing Nami’s sad confession and knowing that she left 

-Zoro making sure that Luffy knows that it’s not his fault

-”I, Roronoa Zoro, vow to stand by your side from now until the end. Until we find the One Piece or die trying. So bring on the Marines or pirates or sea beasts. You’re my captain, Luffy, and I’m your first mate.”

-HE PUT HIS FIST SOFTLY ON TOP OF LUFFY’S HEART AND LUFFY TOOK HIS HAND IN HIS. YES, I’M STILL DEAD, WHY DO YOU ASK?

-The fucking life action of One Piece just give us a 5 minute long canon fanfic of Luffy and Zoro and I am hear for it (Still not a ZoLu girl all the way though, I have to many ships in these show)

-”I wasn’t worried for a second” Yeah, right 

-Also after the most tender moment ever, with Zoro’s hand, the one on his chest, still on his own, Luffy almost kills Zoro himself moving him to hard

-Usopp showing off and Zoro’s smiling answer being “You scared’em off, The Great Captain Usopp” knowing full well that it’s just a lie is so fucking cute too

-”Lot of dried meat in these barrels. You think we brought too much?” ”You know who are you sailing with?” and proceeding to look the man that guide them to Baratie only using his nose

-Luffy getting super excited about Sanji joining them not only because he thinks he is a good guy and a good fighter, also because he is an excellent cook

-”Why are we bringing the waiter?” “Because we can’t boil water” (btw Zoro has no right to look this fucking good saying that)

-Sanji’s goodbye 10/10

-Buggy’s head bag <3

[bekahdoesnerdshit]

Scrawled on the first blank page of a stolen spellbook:

Day 1: Already working on a way to get you back; some rich old lady knows a way to get the magic we’re gonna need. She reminds me of that shitty “migration and language” professor you had, so you can imagine how much fun dealing with her has been.Met a weirdo in a mask who you’re gonna hate, and a little illiterate wizard who’s gonna give you a heart attack. Also been dealing with the burgermeister’s swaggering little attack dog, and you know how I prefer to deal with guys like that. I’d say you’ll hate him too, but I’m pretty sure you’re not gonna have the chance to meet him. Shame.

Stupid how quick I forgot how to not miss you. I hated you for decades, and having you back for a week was enough to ruin all that hard work. Really appreciate that, Hugh.

Day 2: Almost died today. Figured you’d want to know, so you can yell at me about it later. In fairness, it was because I was trying to be a good person. I could have just taken Kai and left, but I didn’t.…thought about doing it, though. Didn’t fucking matter in the end, but I guess I wanted you to know that too. That I tried to do the right thing. Anyway. Ireena’s dead. Turns out vampires here only know one trick; pick a fight nobody wants, kill one person, and leave. Izek’s(1) dead too though at least, so let’s count our victories where we find them. And then. And fucking then. That rich old bitch who’s supposed to help me get you back? Decided that our deal is off, because she got Strahd to do her dirty work for her. And then she had the fucking audacity to lock me up in her stupid, ugly house. I’m writing this now to keep from going to town with my crowbar in here until something happens. You’ll have to excuse me if my handwriting is shit right now; I’m fucking furious.

…I can’t believe this smug, entitled dickhead is keeping me from spending the night with you.

…I’m gonna pry up a floorboard and take a shit down there.

(1)Sorry. Izek is the ‘swaggering little attack dog’ from before. Dropped his name with a lot of confidence there before remembering I’d given exactly zero context. Thank god I had so fucking long to sit and proofread this thing tonight!

Day 3 Got screwed over for having a shred of empathy for someone who just lost someone they cared about. Started to forget that I’m the only one here who gives a shit about saving you but don’t worry: I got a swift kick-in-the-dick reminder and now my head’s back on straight. Not making that mistake again.

Strahd showed up in Vallaki which, I cannot stress enough, is not my fault. Not for lack of trying! But I didn’t get to help kill the burgermeister or hand over the anti-vampire bones. This mess is deeply, entirely, not my fault. Anyway. He made it clear that he calls the shots there now, and you know what? Say what you will about the guy, but he knows how to make a fucking entrance and command a crowd. I bet his Lang201 students never fall asleep during his lectures.

At least one good thing came of today: got to see one of the consorts(2) beat to shit and left to die. Other than that we picked up another stray (this one had a huge book of Barovian history; you know I started tearing through it immediately), fought some fucked up werewolves, and… oh yeah! Got backed into a corner and forced to waste a day helping out this random family and their vineyard, instead of going to Krezek after dropping Uke off. Like we had planned. Like I said, kick-in-the-dick reminder.

I don’t care what anyone has to say about it; I’m going to Krezk. Alone, if it comes to it. I’m not chasing after some fucking- gem, or whatever. They can figure it out on their own.

(2)Not Antonio. The one who killed Ireena, who I would have loved for you to meet. God, that would have been great. …great for me, that is. You would have hated her. And I would have loved that.

Day 4 I won’t admit that it was a fun fight. You’re going to be the only person who ever reads these, but I still won’t give them that satisfaction. As far as they get to know, I was mad to be forced to go and grumpy the whole time I was there. And to be clear; I was. Mad about it, that is. But it’s…fine. Because I’m so fucking nice, I’ll be the bigger person and let it go. We’re heading to Krezk in the morning, so at least we’re back on track.

Oh by the way, I took Dylan to get a tattoo for her last birthday. She said she wasn’t gonna tell you until she moved out, but she told me I could tell you if we ever spent twenty minutes together without fighting. She was obviously joking, but here we are. We’re well past twenty minutes, I think. It’s a little rainbow beetle on her bicep. It’s pretty cute, I think she did the sketch herself. She handled the whole thing like a champ.

Day 5 Spent most of today traveling to Krezk. Spent the rest of the day in Krezk. Great stuff.

Going to see the Abbot tomorrow. Supposedly he's the guy that can fix you, and I’m gonna knock him around until he does. See you soon, hopefully. I’m getting bored of journaling.

Day 6 Fuck them. Fucking spineless, brainless, self-righteous cowards. Sanctimonious hypocrites. Bastards.

I don’t answer to them. If they think that I’m going to bow down and let them rip this chance away from me without fighting back, they got another fucking think coming.

I’m not leaving Krezk without you. And I’ll burn the bridges I have to to make it happen.

forget he exists when you look away stay focused

writing in notebook. about us? followed us

[The writing is jumbled, scattered and hard to read]

puts thoughts in your head

Forget he exists when you look away

[Crosswritten with the previous line, illegible]

trades in secrets? knowledge? have to assume he takes it. BAD IDEA

Day 7 I didn’t write that.

No. Obviously I did. I hacked through my t’s at that annoying angle I picked up from you, and looped the l’s together in that way I picked up to annoy you. No one else has breathed on this thing in the last week. Obviously, I wrote it.

But I don’t remember doing it.

Am I going

Alright, alright. No point freaking out about it; let’s take it one step at a time. Way I see it, there’s three explanations:

Someone took and wrote in your spellbook since the last time I opened it, which was earlier this afternoon (found your weird Elder Tongue transcription by the way. You’re gonna be so mad if I crack it without you)

I’m not I’m starting to My mind isn’t reliable. Unlikely.

I wrote it, I’m right, and there’s a creepy little pervert skulking around the shadows.

Number one’s impossible, the only time your spellbook isn’t in my holster is if I’m writing in it. Leaves two and three, and between one where I’m losing my mind and I’m not, well. If there’s one brain I trust, it’s mine.

Day 8 You’ll never guess who showed his stupid, ugly face again.

Mhm. That’s right.

Y’know, I’ve been thinking about it the last few days, what I’d do when we ran into him again. I thought I might try to play it cool, not give him the satisfaction of having got to me. Get in some quips about not having to pay alimony anymore, or about getting full custody of the kids. I don’t know. But when I saw him, I just- I saw red. I didn’t hear a word out of his mouth, I just. I just shot him. And hit him. Over and over and it felt

Did it feel good? We didn’t kill him. I don’t think we came close. He almost killed Zavisza. Would have too, if Strahd hadn’t shown up to monologue at us again. He wants one of our tagalongs (both of them, technically, I guess. We gotta stop taking in strays) and instead of just letting him have the guy he wants (So sorry to see you go! Best of luck! We’ll miss you! Etc.) our stupid, self-important paladin and his dumbass little savior complex—

I can’t even put how stupid it is into words. Thank fuck I’m lucky enough that you’re going to be unlucky enough to have to sit through it with me. You’ll see. You’ll be just as annoyed as I am.

But. Apparently, there’s a scroll of Raise Dead in the ruins of a swamp town south of Vallaki. This is it, Hugh. This is- It has to be. It has to be. We’re going to go to this stupid swamp, we’re going to find this woman and take her scroll, and I’m gonna fix you.

See you soon.

Day 9 Another travel day. You should be proud of how responsible I was, even with Flips trying his hardest to get us killed by goading us on into the swamp tonight. We’re camping out here on the edge, and we’ll head in fresh in the morning. If nothing else goes wrong (one can dream), I’ll get my hands on that scroll and have you back tomorrow.

And, well. When something does go wrong, let’s at least hope it’s a quick detour. Because otherwise, we’re going back to Plan D(3).

(3)The “D” is for “De-face”, of course. Look, it made me laugh. You can lecture me about that joke being in poor taste tomorrow.

Day 10 Berez is, uh. Was, I guess. Berez was It was a shitshow. Who cares.

Almost got myself hanged when we went back to I mean. Who fucking cares.

Hugh, I’m scared. Terrified. Everything has gone wrong every step of the way to get you back, and this is going to be the same. Borris was dead when we got here, the scroll was gone. Who’s to even say it’ll actually be in this stupid tower when we get there? What if someone else has used it? Burned it? What if it doesn’t work, if resurrection just doesn’t work here? What if it does work but you come back wrong? Hurt? Broken? A rat?? What if this was all for nothing?

If I keep saying “tomorrow”, eventually I’ll be right.