#stronger than you realize
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fading is the easy thing to do. but to persist in spite of the temptation to disappear makes you stronger than you will ever allow yourself to realize
#writing#writeblr#writblr#writers#writers on tumblr#poem#poems#poems and quotes#poetry#poems on tumblr#poems and poetry#poetblr#original poem#original writing#writing community#creative writing#original#og writing#hope#persist#persistance#strength#fading#fade#loss of hope#temptation#temptation to fade#temptation to disappear#disappear#stronger than you realize
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love the idea of ness being physically strong . love it so so much . your loyal guard dog bf who treats you like an angel and looks sweet enough that catcallers don’t expect it when he absolutely wrecks their shit
#GIVE ME FERAL NESS OR GIVE ME DEATH ……….#the idea of him being sooo much stronger than he seems . phew#a little buff even#phew phew pheww#it does something to you but he’s soooooo clueless#i think he even makes himself smaller in your presence without realizing it . esp if you’re short and scrawny#he wants to appear non-threatening …. a wolf in sheep’s clothing one might say#>:3#<- thinking abt him#ari noises ✩
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What can I say? They're my favorite.
#twdg#twdg clouis#clouis#twdg clementine#twdg louis#sometimes they creep back into my mind and i'm like 'ah yes' like a crow admiring a pretty stone they found years ago and kept#also thank you pi for the screenshots. i used to have a whole folder full of them but that was when i was doing themed nights#the source for these is me i just have a random document full of dynamics and ship things i enjoy because.....i dunno i like keeping track#and so many of them apply to clouis but there's also an overlap of with clouis and rose/alistair [my warden from origins and alistair] like#alistair's romance route is like an evolved matured and extended version of clouis sksksks gee i wonder if i have a type#look you present me with a character who deflects with humor and isn't taken seriously by the rest of the group and the longer you know the#the more you realize how high they've built a wall around themselves and how *unwell* they really are and how they're not as sunshine#as they present themselves and also they avoid leadership and responsibility until they grow closer with someone who pushes them#and they end stronger and more balanced as a person while finding the affection they've craved#and also there's the daddy issues#present me with that character as a romantic option and i'm in no questions asked okay i don't want the mean broody one that's meh to me#i want the one that has every reason to be broody but chooses not to be because they have a completely different defense mechanism#and a warped sense of themselves and self-esteem issues they leave unaddressed until forced to face them#i'm just saying i'm aware that i have a type i'm always going to gravitate toward clouis nearly checks all the boxes#also the lack of clouis these days? my crops are thirsty and i have too many ongoing projects to do anything about it other than this sksks#so until i make time to finish my long ass louis/clouis analysis this is the best i can provide for now
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When you're one of the most selfish mc who only saves people because it's part of a job you never wanted and did not get to chose or you would've died, who took your co-workers' morals and ideals because you didn't have any and desperately wanted to fit in somewhere, be it with the heroes or the villains, who's activelly haunted by one the most tragic past to have been created and suffer from a psychosis so bad (dare I say schizophrenia) that even your enemies acknowledged that you are mentally ill and objectively flawed in your judgement, never hesitated to try to kill anyone and has the most egoistic reason to be a good person but the fandom still thinks you're just a kind crybaby "I don't know what a gun is" homosexual twink.
#him being refered as an angel by Shibuzawa is FUCKING IRONIC !!#ASAGIRI IS ALWAYS IRONIC WHEN IT COMES TO LIGHT NOVELS CENTERED AROUND ATSUSHI#Ex : The plot of 55min being parallele to the Decay of Angels arc#He's also called the Man-eating tiger and yes I do think that Dazai lied to him when he said he never ate anyone to preserve his psyche#and was also called “the man who can see the future” and has time travelled with Akutagawa like why aren't we talking about that#his relationship with Mori is also actually good#Mori is one if not the only character who saved and helped Atsushi during their first meeting and kept good contacts with him#because yes Atsushi has seen Mori knowing that he was the pm boss off-screen and they had a normal exchange#I also think that Shibuzawa Atsushi and Fyodor are connected to a form of Holy Trinity#Believer/God/Angel or Messenger#Joseph/Jesus/Mary#or Fyodor and Atsushi as Jesus and Judas#but the instance of trinity in bsd are dare I say extreme#Oda/Ango/Dazai#Sigma/Fyodor/Nikolai#Atsushi/Akutagawa/Kyoka#and so on#and the whole situation around his ability which is unlike any other#It turns him into Byakko (her own being) (similar to Natsume) and nullify his wounds no matter how lethal (similar to Dazai and Yosano)#and enhance him even with his ability off making him constantly stronger than other characters and dare I say equal to the hunting dogs#yk the MODIFIED humans#and the plot of both 55mins and Dead Apple being around abilities and giving us Atsushi lore make me think that Atsushi and Byakko are 1/2#probably a sort of higher being since some abilities are very religious centered (how Fyodor sees abilities and Shibuzawa) 2/2#but I think it would lend toward a “sinner” position which would be crazy because that Atsushi would then probably be the reason why Fyodor#hates abilities so much if Atsushi and Byakko are somehow be connected to the “sin” of abilities#and so you guys know Atsushi's orphanage was a church so yes he's related to christianity#and the Decay of Angels is LITTERALY full of religious people to different degrees#and it would be ironic (once again) if the antagonists were the “Angels” and the protagonist a demon#I just realized that I did a lot of typos sorry I got too excited#but yeah keep calling bsd bad written (we're on barely chap.115 no good manga was finished by chap.115 guys just wait for the rest to drop)
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in the span of maybe an hour, clara oswald goes from, "I already know - don't say it." to, "people like you and me should say things to each other" and I'll never get over it
she literally gets pulled out of time the moment before her death and learns he's been clawing his way back to her for 4.5 BILLION years?? Just to save her??? I would also suddenly and urgently have words
#doctor who#clara oswald#12th doctor#twelveclara#you say goodbye to the person who's most important in the whole universe to you#things between you are left unsaid but not unknown#and then just before your heart stops beating - he's there??#but he's frantic and desperate and angry and not entirely himself and when you look in his eyes#you know it's been more than a few minutes for him#but BILLIONS of years???#(Clara's stronger than me I'd pass out or go catatonic from the sheer enormity of that realization)#of course you have to say something in the face of something so terrible and beautiful#and frankly he's too consumed by grief and anger to hear her#but I imagine whatever she said was both a confession and a plea to never do that on her behalf again#dw#i think even at the end clara doesn't quite grasp the sheer depth of his love for her until then#and she never wanted to die - but she didn't want him to do THAT; that level of devotion was unfathomable#god im obsessed with them#when is it my turn
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I wonder what Frank's reaction would be to Howdy's visiting cousin... especially since Howdy would talk about his family, but now the rest of the neighbors get to see a relative? I can only imagine the antics bwaha!
(A silly thing, for you!)
AWEEE MY BB BOYO ;;;;; more for frank to absolutely obsess over got d a m-
#Frank gonn have to watch his back tho#Robbie has a primal instinct to catch anyone off guard and headbutt them into the air HSGDHDJJ#Aka angry horned beetles when they fight-#Gave howdy a few dotted scars in his back back in the day LMAO#however now that howdy is taller and stronger than him he can easily just grab onto his horns#Robbie just goes “awe poo”#I just realized that if howdy was to have a giant family get-together in the neighborhood#Frank would absolutely lose it-#Gets ascended into the heavens HZHDHDHHD#ALSO#My god howdy family ocs has got to be one of my favorite genders dawg#It's like he has so much family that technically all of the ocs made as siblings and such could be canon LMAO#Love love love AAAAAA#ALSO ANYWAY ENOUGH WITH ME RAMBLING GAH#YOU DRAW HIM SO CUTE DAMN IT XHHXJDJDJJDHDHDJ#HES JUST EXISTIN ;;;;;;;
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[PUT INTO PLACE, TIED DOWN AND ARRANGED, AND IS NEVER THE SAME, AGAIN.]<-listen to my favorite songs. VAMPIRES ARE WONDERFUL ARENT THEY. THE FLESH IS SO MUCH MORE DURABLE. SO MUCH STRETCHIER THAN HUMANS. THE STRESS DOESNT KILL A VAMPIRE THE SAME WAY IT DOES A HUMAN. YOU CAN TAKE THEM APART THREAD BY THREAD AND LEAVE THEM WIDE AWAKE WITHOUT WORRY OF THE BRAINMATTER SPOILING UNDER VINEGARY AGONY.
#cw gore#WEEEE WHIPPING OUT ALL MY BELOVED PIXEL HORROR GAME SOUNDTRACKS FOR THIS ONE#STILL A WIP#SORTA. FORKSFORKSFORKS INSPIRED ME TO START WORKIN AT IT AGAIN. AND NOW IT LIVES. IT LIIIVEESS!!!#MOSLT.Y ATLEAST. I MIGHT MESS W IT MORE LATER. WE SHALL SEE. ANYWAY GABRIEL MONTEZ HUH. WOW POOR GUY#THERES A FASCINATING FEELING THAT COMES WITH BEING ON A OPERATING TABLE.AND BEING IN IMMENSE PAIN#ONE OF MY FONDEST MEMORIES IS LAYING ON A DENTIST CHAIR. SHAKING AND INVOLUNTARILY CRYING AFTER MANY MANY#NEEDLES TO MY THE MOUTH. I METABOLIZE THE NUMBING STUFF QUICKLY APPARENTLY. THEY NEEDED ALOT OF NUMBING SHOTS#BUT I WASNT AFRAID OR DISTRESSED. THE DENTIST WAS VERYVERY NICE AND ALSO UH. PRETTY. BUT THATS BESIDE THE POINT#THE POINT IS. THAT IT WAS FASCINATING TO REALIZE MY PHYSICAL RESPONSE TO PAIN UNDER A CONTROLLED ENVIRONMENT#I DIDNT KNOW HOW EASY IT WAS TO SHAKE AND TO CRY PRYVIOUS TO THAT EXPERIENCE.MY DENTAL ADVENTURES CONTINUE#THEY CONTINUE TO HELP ME UNDERSTAND WHAT ITS LIKE FOR PAIN TO BOIL AWAY THE TIME. TO DISTORT THE PASSING HOURS AND CONSUME EVERY THOUGHT#DO YOU REMEMBER PAIN? THE MOST SEVERE PAIN IN YOUR LIFE? NOW WILL YOU IMAGINE RED LIGHTS? RED LIGHTS AND SHIFTING FIGURES#NOW WILL YOU IMAGINE PAIN UNRELENTING.PAIN WORLD SHATTERING.PAIN IMMORTAL.CAN YOU IMAGINE BEING PULLED APART#THE HUMAN MIND CAN ONLY WITHSTAND SO MUCH PAIN BEFORE IT SHUTS DOWN AND HIDES.IT NEEDS TO PROTECT ITSELF AFTERALL. PAIN CAN ALTER#PAIN SHIFTS THE CHEMISTY OF THE MIND OF THE FLESH OF THE SOUL. FOR HUMANS ATLEAST. BUT YOU ARE NO LONGER HUMAN#YOU CHOSE OTHERWISE DIDNT YOU BOY.BECAUSE YOU WANTED MORE.STATUS.POWER.APPROVAL.SECURITY.SAFET.Y.#OHHH YOU CAN WITHSTAND THE PAIN FOR THAT. FOR ALL THAT. YOU WERENT TOLD THERE WOULD BE PAIN BUT YOU KNOW WHAT YOU WERE PROMISED.#ITS ALL WORTH IT IN THE END. NOW LETS JUST HOPE SOME BLONDE TWERP DOESNT PROVE TO BE STRONGER THAN THE STRONGEST PEOPLE IN YOUR LIFE#LETS HOPE NO ONE FUCKS THIS UP. LETS HOPE NO ONE FUCKS THIS UP. I LOST MY TRAIN O THOUGHT#anyway dawww poorr gabeee that shit probably huuurrrrtttss but so much time has passed that your body got tired of screaming and squirming#why havnt you passed out yet? maybe you might as well have at this point. like sleeping with your eyes open and your nerves awake#OH HEY FUNFACT ABT THE ART. I FOUGHT W IT ALOT. TOOK A LONG WHILE FOR ME TO BE REMOTELY HAPPY W THIS.#i was thinking abt pixel horror video games when i made it.just as i do with all great things ofc ofc#i love you pixel horror game i love yooouuuuu.i struggled so much w the colors for so LONNGG UHGHGHGH but im finally happy...im finally fre
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𝟏𝟓 | 𝐋𝐚𝐬𝐭 𝐐𝐮𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐌𝐨𝐨𝐧
ー✧ prince!bakugou x royal guard!reader
"Two warriors with nowhere to let their adrenaline– two Alderans melting like beeswax and forgetting not to touch. Two of you, just the two of you, breathing."
slight cw drunken antics + slurred speech. shoestring patience. you are the only sober two left and carrying your friends to bed requires teamwork. remembering how to speak and pretending not to stare even though exhaustion makes Alderan eyes prettier. the first laughs– warm and uncontrollable. a quiet realization at the foot of the bed where your bodies keep curling closer 3.9k
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The Great Hall vibrates the entire castle tonight. The celebration is obscene. The king is home.
You do not eat in the Hall, you never do, but you stand guard– sit guard from the grand staircase outside just in case. Music rolls through the closed Hall doors up to the entryway's silver constellations. The observatory is finished. The king is home. He does not attend his own banquet tonight and so you do not worry for your company inside. How did he never occur to you? He who built the garden prison for his wife and made it so that there is nowhere to properly hide in Takoba. It’s probably because you’re Alderan that you don’t think much about kings.
If only just until you are found, you will sit on these frosty steps, obscured by their size, and watch the stars twinkle through the widow behind them. It is as tall as they are. This view must be older than this family is because someone built it with love. Because there is nothing behind this part of the castle except for glass and stars and sea.
You smile and long for your oak tree and then smile softer. The muscles in your back ache with overuse, your shoulders too. Sparring with the prince is like dancing.
“Y/n.”
Your head snaps up at the voice from where it had started to slouch with sleep and like a dream your prince is standing at the foot of the staircase. He’s in fine Alderan gold. Did he come through the Hall? How could you doze through the sound of that door opening? Bakugou cocks his head which shakes his ash hair right over his eyes and sends a long red earring to rest soft across his jaw. All you have is moonlight to see him glow.
He hesitates before speaking again, “Is this where you like to hide?”
“You’re one to talk about hiding,” you tease because you are sleepy and lacking basic judgment, and his flinch is hardly hidden, even in the absence of candlelight.
“I need your help.”
If you weren’t awake before you are now, judgment back squarely in place as you skip steps in your hurry to be beside him. Bakugou pulls the air with his temples to lead you to the Hall, boots clicking, hands stiff. Laughter and music vibrates from inside.
“Wait here,” he grumbles and pushes open the door enough to slip through, perfectly enough for the fat wave of alcohol to make you wince. The sound pushes you physically backward a step and your eyes can’t adjust fast enough to stop from squinting, but you can’t help watching even half blind and only mostly awake. It’s only been a few hours but people are standing together on tables in their beautiful frilly clothes, screaming the words to a song no one seems to know. A sea of crowds cheer them on from below, equally as drunk, and the scene stretches on from wall to wall. Line dancing between benches, liquor across the floors and a whole room of joy– Sero is linked arm in arm with two waitstaff at the back of the room, kicking their legs and laughing together at their lack of coordination.
You chuckle before you can think to be weary of so many people crammed together. Uraraka, ten feet off the ground, mimes riding a great stallion around the room with a glass of ale in her fist much to the joy of the soldiers sat below her doubled over with laughter. Shinsou’s not far off, surely to keep her from embarrassing the garrison, but his scowling hands are full of Kaminari who can’t quite stand right without the guard’s hand around his waist. You lean in a bit farther. Just a step. At the front of the room, the Todoroki siblings sit bunched at a clean table, quiet but still talking and drinking like the rest. They are delicate and beautiful and you would lament having a father like theirs if you hadn’t just caught sight of your prince at the table beside them.
He needs help– did something happen? He disappeared this afternoon after the mess in the soldiers’ quarters, is he injured? Is someone else?
Bakugou is grumpy on the best of days, tonight he is fuming. Mina is limp over his shoulder, squealing, and something’s dragging on the floor behind him. You can’t see anything beneath his hips in this crowd.
“What’re ya laughing at?” He hollers over the lively sea and catches you in a stare on his march back to the doors. Were you laughing?
Bakugou holds the stare like he’s got something to say all the way back to your side. A band somewhere under the chaos tunes their strings for another round.
“Alderans can’t hold their liquor,” he growls over the threshold, “like a fucking disease.” It’s Kirishima dragging on the floor behind him. The prince has his champion in a chokehold by the back of the collar. He leans over to drop Mina on the floor, “They’re gone. Can’t go a second without tryin to eat each other’s faces off.” Mina shrieks when she’s plopped to the floor.
He rolls his eyes when he gestures to the pile of drunkards at your feet, “I can’t carry them both upstairs.” Then runs one hand through his hair and flexes the other on his hip to assess the situation. Kirishima drools.
“Miss Mina,” you whisper and crouch in front of her, “can you hold onto me?”
She blinks one eye at a time and grins, “an’thing fr’ pretty lady.”
Kirishima is less lucky, slung across the prince’s shoulders like a training dummy. At least he’s docile. Mina giggles and reels backward every chance she gets from her spot on your back. She squeezes your waist with her thighs and the pressure keeps making you wheeze.
“Ticklish?” Bakugou grunts under the deadweight of his champion. Something catches in his throat and you struggle to keep your head on the hallway ahead instead of checking what kind of face he might be making. He is framed by stars in every window. He glows at the edges in the moonlight. You are ticklish, he knows that.
It’s the four of you trudging through the castle, getting your hair pulled at odd intervals and trying to breathe in the opposite direction of your inebriated company. Kirishima keeps stretching out of his fireman’s hold and with a crackling bark from your prince, ends up halfway down his back. He narrowly catches you when Mina tries to lean back on a staircase, your hands tight under her thighs and the front of your tunic tight in Bakugou’s fist. You would like to laugh. You’re not sure you don’t, but Bakugou doesn’t pause to revel in stupidity with you.
He stays frustrated and silent and you remember dusk bedtimes at camp. Time passed frowning on carriages. Trying as hard as he is now not to look at you. It is easy to hate him.
You might have lost your fury, but your job isn’t lost to you. You haven’t forgotten your responsibility to your kingdom. Protect her son and serve the queen and keep your place in the castle. Don’t kill the King of Takoba. Mina doesn’t weigh much and she keeps the cold away, one foot in front of the other. Bakugou’s golden hair rustles with each step beside you and his biceps, frustrated, flex around Kirishima’s legs. It’s easy, so easy, so much safer to hate him and you just can’t remember how.
Your drowsiness vanished with adrenaline and when adrenaline vanished there wasn’t anything left in its place, it would be awfully easy for something to slip inside.
“She didn’t understand,” you murmur hardly loud enough to hear. Mina twirls your hair.
Even for all his stoicism tonight, the prince still rumbles an, “eh?” into the corridor. Maybe he rolls his eyes? Regardless, he doesn’t stop marching with his barely-conscious cargo.
You murmur again, “Shuzenji.” And he stumbles a bit. His champion is too heavy. “When I thanked her for the room.”
Something inside him shifts beside you– you can hear it, just there under his ribs– like the crumbling of a campfire. He’s looking at you now so you remind yourself not to turn and stare. You smile. It’s getting easier.
“Thank you.”
“Don’t bother.”
“For saving me.”
It’s the two of you walking side by side, failing impossibly. Trying hard not to watch one another.
“Repaying a debt.”
Blood bursts gently under the skin. And you can no longer speak without the smile, no matter how hard you try to tuck your chin into the bundle of Mina’s fingers at your collarbones.
Jeanist and your oak tree, Mitsuki at midnight, how many people can you say fill you with ease?
Bakugou is holding his breath but being here is still easy. Walking is easy. Mina is slipping a bit to the side. Standing close to him is warm, not arson. Sparring with him has made the air too thin and if you’re not careful you’ll touch him again. He’s buckling under the weight of something and you think maybe one of you needs to be tense for the other to know peace–
A clap explodes through the chill of the nighttime castle and your heart pops, a quiet overflow, at the immediate need to account for one thousand things, surroundings, threat, variables, full arms, Bakugou, a pantry staircase, the dark, and when you jolt to fix Mina back upright, she resists. Her hand is planted firmly on the meat of your prince’s ass, where she made good on a t-up to slap him as hard as you’ve ever heard anything hit. He’s frozen. You spit. There’s nothing for it.
As you sink to your knees, her palm leaves a grip in the crease of his trousers and you can barely keep her attached to you with one hand, the other muffling your laughter.
“Attaboy,” Mina groans across your shoulder.
It happens so much faster than you’d expect. But of course he must love them this much for a reason– Bakugou’s lips burst apart in a puff and one rich chuckle breaks the surface. He doesn’t hide it this time. It is flint and tinder. You turn up to him with startled eyes and his smile might be the sun; it’s hardly there and he can’t hide it, doesn’t– he can’t and he doesn’t even try. Yours hasn’t fallen and you don’t think you could force it down for anything.
“dn’t tell kiri.”
Mina’s last words come before either of you try to look away from the other, and modesty evaporates. Bakugou’s grin erupts across his face and you disintegrate fully in hysterics on the rug. He tips his head back and roars.
His laugh is a bonfire, you can hardly hope to hear it and ever calm down, you will laugh together like this until you die surely. He stumbles in his giddiness and backs against the walls to support Kirishima’s weight– Kirishima who wheezes between the chill of the marble and the body of his friend. Tears shine in four Alderan eyes. Mina growls at your jostling. Your hands are stuck firmly to the ground to keep you both from falling over but, surrendering, she lets her fingers slip limp from your neck and tips right over sideways, sprawled.
“– wait Mina, fuck, gods–”
All it takes it one fuck to have Bakugou sliding down the wall like a ragdoll, a hand trying to stitch his gut back together. He’s wheezing now too, exhausted. His ears are red. The veins in the back of his fist threaten to spill from how hard he clenches in laughter.
One second of eye contact and you’re both inconsolable again on the ground. He and Kirishima hunched against the wall, you trembling over your lost cargo, “Mina come back,” you urge through gasps and giggles. Every time you look over to Bakugou, another bout of something bubbles up from your heart. It comes out with the laughter you can’t keep down, but they aren’t the same. They can’t be. One is rich and warm, and the other burns like sugar. Like breathing fire.
A foot soldier is not thrilled to find the four of you enjoying yourselves all over her post and doesn’t appear overly excited at the prospect of corralling Alderans to bed.
“Up,” someone grunts, so much softer than anyone you know. Prince Bakugou has steadied himself on his feet and Kirishima again on his back, and leans over where you’re trying to coax Mina’s arms over your shoulders. He tries to suppress it, but his canines poke sharp out of the corner of a grin. He looms close. Close enough to cast his shadow over you in the moonlight and waft caramel through your hair, “C’mon.”
You would have complied without an argument, if anything failed to contain a chuckle or two, but he doesn’t give you time. Bakugou loops one arm around Mina’s back and your chest and lifts both of you up in an effortless hoist. You rush to grab onto her in the seconds he lets you dangle a few good inches off the ground before setting you down again. He rolls his eyes at the Takoban guard, “Dead on my fucking feet,” and reaches for you to follow. He’s blinking at you like he didn’t just toss three full-grown Alderans around and you’re focusing hard to blink back. Your ears itch with an awful heat.
“Captain,” he looks between the guard– antsy and relieved– and you, and smirks with confusion, “let’s go.”
You hop twice to situate Mina and nod as politely to the guard as you can manage before falling in line beside your prince. Your shoulders bump in the rush. Not-looking was easier before you knew what his smile sounded like.
Mina’s room is in the guest wing, where they house drunk ball guests and foreign diplomats. It’s entirely plain. You ignore a pang of satisfaction at your new bedroom in the highest tower and knock the door open with your hip, boys close behind.
Bakugou hardly waits a second before he dumps Kirishima over his shoulder hard onto a white sofa. They both wheeze, Kirishima more of a subdued misery compared to his prince’s relief and the next sound is a creak not a breath because Bakugou’s feet are heavy on the floorboards when he walks away.
Your friends aren’t lords, but you’re still a soldier. You’ll be gentle. In the dark, you sit at the edge of Mina’s bed and lower her backward into the blankets where she lays, snoring, before you roll her onto her side. It’s pitch black with the curtains drawn, but you know from the silence the prince is long gone.
With a few pillows lined up behind Mina, you rise and make your way to the poor champion in a lump on a sofa much too small for him. You’ll need light for this. The curtains take two hands to tie back; they’re thick for winter weather but when you do, moonlight drowns the room and everyone inside begins to glow. Why are beautiful things here so cold? Your stomach aches from the laughter and you try to be thankful instead of anything else that the prince has gone to bed. This is your job after all. You can’t smell the sea with the windows closed and so it’s almost like being home, dead alone like always.
“What’re you doing?”
Your forehead cracks against the glass in surprise and you turn with both hands pressed hard to your head like you weren’t just falling asleep against the windowpane.
Bakugou raises an eyebrow behind a tall candle and shuts the door behind him. “You know you’re not actually talkin when you stare like that, right?” His grin is more sarcastic than before but no less warm. You gather yourself as the prince sets his candle in a slot beside the door and surveys his company. “Go to bed,” he clucks after a moment of thought.
He crosses the room and inspects three more fat candles melted together on a table in front of the sofa. Kirishima groans. Bakugou pinches a wick. Pink and white burst from under his fingernails and purple crackles under the light his sparks make. Red is next. Pinching, pinching, popping in the dark, until each candle has been lit by the smell of caramel.
He crosses again and lowers himself onto a pile of blankets at the foot of the bed as you watch and remember to speak, “Go.”
“I can’t leave them.”
“They’re fine.”
“I won’t.”
After weeks of defiance, why does he choose now to smile like that? “You’re a nightmare.”
“I can’t. If they aspirate–”
“They’ll deserve it.”
“Highness–”
“You think I can’t keep two drunk babies from dying in their sleep?” Bakugou rolls his eyes and finally scoops his chin up to look at you.
Weeks, months– years, of vitriol– and in three nights you’ve forgotten how his lips curl when he stares at something that he hates. How could you think of anything but home when he watches you with all his attention and the warmth of earthenware eyes? How does your heart hold its seams closed?
He will watch over his friends without sleep, he will suffer their boredom in a matchbox carriage so that they can see this ocean he hates so much. He will fight Takobans and diplomats and royalty to keep his party safe, he’ll sit in the kitchens and pluck your splinters instead of attending a feast in his honor and he will throw himself into the sea.
“Y/n.”
“I won’t leave you.”
His flinch would be bright enough to see on a starless night– in the blacks of shadows. You kneel beside the soft spot he’s made for himself at the foot of Mina’s bed and try to remember how easy it was to laugh with him now that the closeness makes your skin prickle at the hair. He clears his throat instead of teasing.
Two warriors with nowhere to let their adrenaline– two Alderans melting like beeswax and forgetting not to touch. Two of you, just the two of you, breathing.
His voice comes and you turn to look because you are incorrigible. His lips are the first thing that catch the light of the stars in the window beyond you. They’re crooked with attitude. He wets them when he’s thinking and they purse to the left as he speaks.
“I,” The sound is gravel underfoot, “I want..”
You hum, confused– exhausted– and he blinks once slowly, something between frustration and thought and the lull of bed, before turning to meet you. This isn’t the closest you’ve ever been. That helps you see him better. A scar you’ve never noticed catches the moonlight and shines in his hairline and you can count the sleep starting to gather in his pretty eyes.
“Yesterday– earlier I,” a shake of his head kills the thought. It’s hard to hear so you’re much too close and when your pinky presses his from how near you are leaning he turns away and frames himself again in starlight like a ruffled hen. “Earlier,” growling now, “Why unarmed?”
“Unarmed what?”
His jaw catches candlelight when he looks to you again so quickly, exasperated but seemingly entertained, “Combat, you oaf.”
“In the soldiers’ quarters?”
Where did the hatred go? There are mosquitoes you haven’t forgiven– is that what this is? Forgiveness. Sitting on your knees like a proper soldier but letting sleep take all other reason away? Pressing closer than you need to hear him because it is autumn in hell and fire radiates from his chest– a longing Alderan fire you lost somewhere in the sea.
Bakugou rolls amused eyes but nods at the question. Forgiveness isn’t right but you can’t move away, you will never be free of him. You will never want to be.
“It’s,” you start, distracted by weariness and the rhythm of Mina’s breathing– footsteps in the castle and a blue tinge on the windows edge like frost– he bumps your shoulder with his. Warmth finally bleeds into you. He watches just as close as you do because you’re both whispering hardly-awake, but his attention is firmly yours. Red flicks from your neck to an ear, and back again. From your eyes to your lips and back again.
“It’s harder to hold back with a weapon.”
He jerks back instead of spitting on you because his laughter comes faster than he can keep it down, but Kirishima groans and candles flicker and you close your eyes to eat the sound of his joy. You’re slipping. You curl towards him and rest your head on the curve of the bed as he regains the parts of himself that will help him sit up. When he faces you again he’s lost his shield and spear. The iron that clenched his jaw and furrowed his brows and slit his eyes and lace his scowl with hatred, gone. All that’s left is lionheart laughter and a fascination with your smile.
Two Alderans melting. Your legs are sliding out from under that proper kneel and his hands are slipping from the fists he tried to knot them in. Bakugou mirrors you when he rests his head on the edge of the mattress because his bonfire is burning down. Mina snores once loudly and startles herself.
“What does aspiration sound like?” Prince Bakugou Katsuki is his mother’s son smiling with a pale moon cheek smushed into the bedding that supports him. Always looking at you. Close enough to hold.
“Like someone choking on vomit.”
He laughs with everything he has left and rolls his face flat into the duvet. Everything he has left isn’t much, maybe just a candle. It’s enough that you’re smiling again in the pool of wax.
He peeks one eye out from the blanket, “Think we’re in the clear?”
He will roar, he will kill for his people and speak to strangers like ants. He will scare children and end wars and infuriate his dressmaker. He will glare. He will let his mages tease him because it makes them happy and he will watch over them when they’re too drunk to stand. He might laugh. Gods please laugh again. He will close every window and throw you a peach and he will make magic because he knows that you love it.
Suddenly it’s easy, not forgiveness, something new. You, spear and shield of the king. Something like devotion.
It’s a horrible thing to sleep on the floor and Bakugou wakes up first, facing the sunrise with your weight on his arm. You, the fierce and deadly dragon. Your cheek is pressed to his shoulder and the pressure makes you pout. Your lips tremble with breath.
He’ll watch your chest rise. He’ll let your fingers curl around his like ivy when he dares to move and he’ll close his eyes for a moment instead of thinking too hard about hunger or the pink scar that pokes out from the neck of your tunic. You will wake up slightly later than dawn, drooling, alone, blankets wrapped warmly around you.
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could not tag for some reason :(
#what happens when you realize your previously sworn enemy has stronger morals than god#what happens when it's kinda hot#thank you for all this support as always! i am spoiled by my readers <3 im so so happy you enjoy these two weirdos#a hymn to black water#bakugou x reader#bakugo x reader#bnha fantasy au#mha fantasy au#fantasy bakugou#fantasy bakugo#fantasy bakugou x reader#fantasy bakugo x reader#bnha x reader#mha x reader
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Unlike divorced!Kirishima (who told you he wanted to try taking a break before making anything official), I think Deku doesn’t mention anything at all before he tries to remove himself from your life.
Goes straight from simply acting busy and being distant to suddenly, fully ignoring you at home and over the phone; I don’t even think he tries to serve you divorce papers before he moves out entirely, so desperate to… what? You don’t know and probably never will.
(That is, until he returns after years of silence with tears in his eyes asking for you to take him back.)
#deku#tries to wedge himself back into your life like nothing happened and refuses to say what he was doing while separated or why he needed to#I’m imagining he wanted to keep you safe not realizing he traumatized you instead#or maybe went undercover if he wouldn’t even explain to kacchan or Shoto#who refuse to write him off entirely but loathe the person who he’s become#but also I think … in more angsty kiri-esque fashion.. maybe he thought not being wrapped around your finger would make him stronger ?#(I think he lasts a lot longer than Kiri. Kiri barely stays away the full summer season before he’s regretting even suggesting divorce)#but I think deku lasts anywhere from 2-5 years#before you find him as a big lump in your bed again and try to scratch his eyes out#it’s rough#and do you have kids?#would I be evil if I say yes ?#what if he leaves u with a little one#a tot… who remembers him……..#although that’s acting like his father which I don’t think he would#but .. maybe I can see it#not sure#divorced deku#shii posts#gen
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not kol and damiano, talking about forming an army or witches and newly vampires to conquer the world. ella and her mind. @damnatore.
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i know this is kinda minor..........but i'm OBSESSED with how u always draw akechi with sharp eyes w/ lines under them (not necessarily eyebags but just enough to show his fatigue) ITS JUST SOOOO.....LIKE IT RLY ADDS THE PERFECT TOUCH YK?
it feels like it's truly him. it shows the cracks in the facade he tries to keep up
AHH TY?????????? i love his pre-third semester look where he resembles a deer almost….the big brown doe eyes and elegant stance and charming demeanor that overall radiates a very trusting and soft appearance
but that’s what’s especially interesting because looks can be deceiving. just over the course of a single day his entire psyche and appearance warp into something far more sinister as he is revealed as the actual villain.
idk i find it so insane that he can just flip the switch like that, how quickly his facade can change. he’s an actor on shido’s stage, a pawn on his chessboard, and he’s learned to tuck away his innermost desires and thoughts to play the role of the detective prince who will save society. diabolical. actually terrifying.
#ho is u bipolar?#ppl actually say he suffers from multiple personality disorder but i feel like that’s not the case 😭#his acting is genuinely that good. they don’t realize that it’s only ren that causes him to falter#bc ren is the only one who showed him what he could be if he allowed himself to be saved. he was the only person who offered him salvation#wouldn’t there be a few cracks in your facade if someone who could undoom you literally SAVE you from your fate showed up#and then you’re destined to kill this guy?? 😭😭#it’s such a cruel irony that it’s actuallt laughable. akechi is stronger than me bc i would’ve crashed out MONTHS earlier#lotus’s asks
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Day 145 | id in alt
I am a FIRM believer that utahime vs Gojo would be basically sukuna vs Mahoraga and Gojo wouldn't be the sukuna of that fight.
#dailykugisaki#jjk#kugisaki nobara#fushiguro megumi#gojo satoru#utahime iori#you're telling me a woman that can amplify her skills by DANCIN wouldn't woop ass???#ngl utahime would be the most flames hand to hand combat instructor there is#ive watched too many monty oum animated fights can you tell#she would he INSANE to fight against because she is should be fluid as hell in her fights possibly moreso than the king of curses himself#i just want to see her get that shmoovment down while beating somebody into a paste#im thinking too hard she'd get stronger as the fight went on because fighting is just another form of dance to her and i would like to see#gege FUMBLED long ago and im tired of people just now realizing it#cursed technique? Nah dance dance revolution nuke#i forgot to draw her scar im gonna throw up
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HYDRA kidnaps Loki but all the goons look up to him and think he’s the coolest guy and keep kissing up to him because they really really want him to join their ranks
#and when he shows no interest in becoming a fellow cooperating agent they want to work under him instead#HYDRA turns into Loki’s gang gang#the goons overthrow the other guys running it#HYDRA accidentally gets a makeover and becomes a good organisation#the bad ones are weeded out#they focus on things like ecosystem recovery and killing corrupt politicians#goons: but you’re much stronger than Pierce?#Loki: this is true. prove your loyalties to me by weeding him out to the public. you won’t.#goons: DONE. what’s next Boss?#the remaining goons once they’re filtered out are largely people bribed or with no choice but to serve HYDRA#just regular people in tough places#the goons unionise and make Loki their figurehead#‘I joined because I wanted to do good in the world... and then when I realized it was too late to back out...’ alright#here’s a fund go start that medical research you wanted#HYDRA leaders: we shall torture the alien!#HYDRA goons in the lab room: no way! why would Thor do that?? what a jerk!!!! tell us more stories of Asgard Boss. we’ll avenge you!
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maybe in another lifetime. maybe in another universe he could have met you earlier, met you whole and unbroken.
he's aware how he only brings you pain, how he won't be enough, his soul smoke and ashes and there's nothing to save, nothing to pull together to offer you. and oh, how much he wants to present you with his heart, beating between his hands only for you. but his insides are nothing more than anger and grief, hatred and jealousy. what good would it be to show you this?
and in another life, maybe, he could have bared himself to you; his blackened bones, his rotting fear, his soft desperation, craving love more than revenge. in another place, he would have taken your hand, caressed your skin with his own, with another skin, with the skin of your love.
but there he is, hands empty, his insides covered and bulging. the blackness inside of him too overwhelming to ignore. who is he to still keep you? to keep you despite his skin, not the right one, not the one you need. and maybe for the first time in his life, he chooses to give up, he chooses to let you go, to let you drop before his fingertips blacken your bones.
he can't help but think: maybe in another lifetime.
#i am bored do not perceive me#random thought. did not reread it bc honestly idc oops#idk. the thought of dabi realizing he's not good for you?#and he cant change anything about it? it's too late for him?#soft dabi#me think idk#is he even truly capable of feeling love? probably.#is that love stronger than his hatred? no. not in this case oops#dabi x reader#dabi x you#designing the web
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I know they're both Vision users that can handle themselves fine, but I think it would be cute if Haitham and Kaveh commissioned Lumine to be their bodyguard whenever they can during desert trips. She's experienced in roaming the desert and really strong to booth, so she's the best option all around.
#you ever realize that lumine is like... stronger than anyone in sumeru#the only ones who can get close are cyno and wanderer#and the question of “how close” is kinda broad isn't it#not that i have concrete proof that lumine is miles and miles above them#but is kinda wild that she's so high up compared to other regions#genshin impact#lumine#alhaitham#al haitham#kaveh
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Hey hey genuine question do you guys think I should have a Temporary Breakup arc in my ship with Mojo 🤔🤔🤔 I discussed it with my gf a while back and I have been thinking about it but idk if I wanna make it canon or not that it like. Actually Happens to them 👀
#its mostly for the dramaaaaaa 💖 but i think it would also make the two fall back into love even stronger than before#the reason would definitely be some kind of betrayal of cherry's trust on mojo's part 💀 NOT FUCKING CHEATING THO#just like throwing her needs to the side to do an evil plan or something. maybe even accidentally she doesnt matter. oof#accidentally saying*#but then he'd realize how fucking lonely he is and want them back 🥺🥺🥺 and would have to prove his devotion this time 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺#man the more i talk about this the more i might make it canon. what do nyall think tho#ruby rambles#💜: loving you's a felony#self ship
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