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aonoexpat · 1 year

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Feeling untethered

12-05-2023

I'm long overdue for a blog update, I'm going to be honest: I've had a really rough couple of weeks, and I've simultaneously been wanting to wait until it's over and I'm feeling better so I can give y'all positive texts and happy pictures, and to write an honest and open update but feeling too low to actually sit down and do it. I'm not entirely sure where I'm at right now headspace-wise, but I'm gonna give it a try!

The common denominator over the past weeks is that I've been feeling tired and depleted. I'm leaking energy and unable to refill it quickly enough, due to a couple of reasons:

Work/money 💸 : I work about 25 hours a week, divided over both a bartending and a catering job. Beside that I try to go busking twice a week. Even though I enjoy all three of those things most of the time, I can't deny that they are tiring. Especially the catering job, since the service they aim to provide is a bit more high-end. And even though I clearly need my down time, I constantly feel like I'm not working enough. That road trip wasn't cheap, and, having been brought up Dutch, I felt (and still feel, frankly) the need to replenish my funds asap, which is hard to do when 1 grocery run of a couple of essentials costs me a day's wages, and my weekly(!) rent is $165, excluding power etc. That brings my monthly rent to ~$719, which equals about €417, and that's only because the Aotearoa Dollar isn't doing great at the moment. It's worth noting this is by far the cheapest room I could find (anything under $200 a week is a steal). Te Whanganui-a-tara is generally not a cheap place to live. Every time I feel like I'm gaining some ground financially, something comes up, like a broken amp for busking that needs replacement, or a week of few work shifts. I haven't managed to break even since I got to the country. I'm hoping I might manage this month, but I'm nowhere near saving any substantial amount.

Living situation 🏠 : my new living space is much closer to everything, which saves me time energy and money in bus fares, but it's not a house I'd call home, unfortunately. My flatmates are messy and unorganised (which, as I have learned today, attracts pests), and often fail to understand that loud noises (like them throwing up in the bathroom at 03:30 AM) aren't magically stopped by a half-closed door. I tend to be on edge when I'm home, which makes relaxing and re-energising a challenge. I try to make myself feel better by burning some incense and listening to music (nostalgic Dutch music if I can help it) with my noise cancelling headphones, which helps me feel more isolated and safe, but it's not a long-term solution.

Reflection 🪞 : being back in Te Whanganui-a-tara, I've gone right back to hanging out with settled people, even though I had a reminder of what it's like to chill with other travelers in Tāmaki-makau-rau. I don't really have as easy a way to get in touch with them here because I'm not staying in a backpackers. Because of that I think I've slipped into a strange limbo state of trying to feel at home here, and being bothered by failing at that, while simultaneously planning to get out of here. I find myself trying to build a life here as though I was in The Netherlands, and then realising that's not why I came here, and beating myself up about not making the most of my time here. Even though I did come here with the question in mind if this place could be home, so I should be evaluating that. But I'm pretty certain Te Whanganui-a-tara will not be home. So I tell myself to get out of here, but to do that I want to save up money, so for now I have to stay (though I'm starting to think I might be falling victim to a sunk-cost fallacy there). Besides that, my brain has just gotten moderately comfortable again in a new place, and is reluctant to mess everything up all over again. It's like when I left home I dipped my toes in the cold water of being on the road, traveling and the discomfort that comes with it, and then once I got here I quickly pulled back and said no, actually, this place is warm enough. But that won't do. It's interesting to observe though, and all the thoughts that come along with it. I'm having existential crises and revelations on the daily about what I want in my life, and realisations about what's important to me. I never used to have that back home. I did experience it on my last backpacking trip, but it's different this time. Last time I still had a clear path to return to: when the trip was over, I'd go to uni back home. Now, my future is one big question mark (not even talking about all the large scale societal threats). These questions and ponderings are a large reason why I wanted to go travel in the first place. But by god, it's exhausting. And scary.

I miss my family and my friends, I've started to realise how utterly alone I can feel here. I'm doing everything on my own, I'm dragging myself to work every day, I push myself to go out there and play music, I pick myself up when I'm a crying mess on the floor, I cook for myself, and I motivate myself to keep going, to evaluate what I want, and to find the next right thing. And sometimes I forget that that takes a toll on a person. I'm in an unfamiliar environment, with unfamiliar people, a whole new political climate, a different culture that undeniably has its own challenges, no matter how idyllic Aotearoa can seem from a distance.

And I'm actually goddamn proud of that. I'm strong. Because despite all of my challenges, I'm staying on top of everything. I'm never late for work, I answer all my emails, I pay weekly visits to the bank to exchange my busking coin, and I do my laundry. Go me 💪

So. What now?

I've been quite eager to find somebody to travel together with. I know public transport is very limited here, so traveling by car is pretty much a must. I am personally very uncomfortable in a car though, so I'm a bit defiant to give in. Driving is not my style, let alone flying short distances, and I feel like I would be able to get around without either of those. And I probably would, but it would make things a lot more difficult, that I can't deny. So if I have to drive, I would definitely prefer to have a travel buddy, so when the car breaks down we can panic together.

However, the other day a coworker asked me how I feel about traveling alone, and I told them I loved it. It's my favourite way to travel because you get to choose your own path and don't need to care about anybody else's plans… and then I realised I wasn't actually doing any of those things, and finding a travel buddy would completely defeat the purpose. A while back, I wrote an entry in my personal diary saying "I don't want to live in a city, I want a van with the back door opening to a sunset and a pillow and a cup of tea." So after talking to my friend yesterday, I did a full 180 and suddenly set my sights on trying to procure a van for myself. And even though it scares the absolute shit out of me to the point where the thought actually makes me cry, it also looks 100 times sunnier (metaphorically, it's 100% winter over here) in my mind than any of my previous plans. Only now I'm realising that my plan of getting a rideshare to the next town and doing the same thing there actually made me dream about going back home. And that's not the way I want to feel.

The past days I've felt sick so I've allowed myself to lie in bed and rest up (dw, covid test came back negative), but the coming week I'll hopefully actively start the hunt. My mind still swings back and forth between 'driving around in a van is an absolute dream' and 'driving around in a van is my worst nightmare', so I'm just letting it swing and I'll see where it lands, I suppose!

I've needed the past month to figure myself out. It's funny how, looking back, it feels like I've been wasting time here. Now that I have a bit of an idea of a next step, it's easy to forget what it was like not to know, and it seems like I've been making the wrong choices by letting myself get tired and depleted and have not the best time here. But rationally I know that every day I've spent here has been necessary to get me to where I am now. It's just like when I'm sick and I spend a day resting, and then I feel better, and it seems like there was no reason why I couldn't have been productive that day. But the rest is an essential part of the process, as much as perfectionism tries to deny that. So I'm giving myself positive affirmations and biding my time (and basking in Eurovision distractions 🤩) until I feel energised again!

Some happier notes because I can't help it:

Like I mentioned, the amp I used for busking broke so I needed to get a new one, and opted for the Vox Mini3 G2. It's a kilo lighter and almost twice as small as my old one, which has ultimately made my busking experience a lot nicer!

I made a necklace out of the pumice and sand from the beach of Taupō-nui-a-Tia and I'm actually really happy with how it turned out:

I paid another visit to Zealandia and got a closer look at the Takahē, I'm BEGGING you to turn the sound on and hear the little noises they make:

We went to Red Rocks at night to see the Southern lights, but they weren't visible with the naked eye. My friend's camera captured this though:

I'm off to bed now, I have another long day of work waiting for me tomorrow. Thanks for bearing with me ❤️

#aotearoa #backpacking

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360iris · 3 years

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Unlocking The Marauders Daddy Kink

Calling Remus “Daddy” for the first time:

It’s the summer before 7th year. Remus has been sleeping over at your house for two weeks before going to visit James and Sirius at the Potter’s.

You’re in the middle of putting together an Ikea couch that’s intended to go in the flat the two of you are getting after graduation, but in the meantime it’s staying in your room.

You’re focusing in on the directions and manage to accidentally get your finger pinched under the wood.

“Ouch!”

“What’s wrong?” Remus asks, popping up from the other side of the mountain of blocks and cushions. “Did you hurt yourself, angel?”

“Yeah.” You answer with a wince, showing him the finger. “I just pinched it, but damn that hurt!”

He chuckles at the pout on your lips, gently clasping your hand and pressing a comforting kiss against the offended digit.

“My poor baby, how’s that feel?” He asks in an overly sweet voice and you grin despite his patronizing tone.

“ ‘S okay now. Although I’d feel even better if you gave me more kisses, Daddy.”

You laughed at the way he froze, you loved the rare moments when you got to one-up him at quick thinking.

Something you didn’t account for was how his brow arched in intrigue, his tongue darting out to wet his lips before they slid into a sly smirk.

“Really now? Well I can give you more than just kisses, sweetheart. How would that make you feel?”

Calling James “Daddy” for the first time:

It was the morning of Hogsmeade weekend and you’d figured it wouldn’t hurt to check on the assigned plot in the greenhouses, that was granted to you by Professor Sprout, after breakfast.

And no matter how many warnings you gave, James insisted on tagging along even though it was clear he was freezing from the snow and extreme temperature drop.

He stood all but subtly shivering beside you as you checked the soil, watered the plants and fussed over whether or not they needed to be pruned.

“You could’ve waited inside the castle, love. It’s not like I’m in any sort of immediate danger out here.” You noted teasingly, beginning to put away your tools.

“I know.” He huffed, attempting to warm his hands for the umpteenth time. “Just didn’t want you to be alone. Besides, instead of you walking all the way back to the common room to find me, we can head straight to the Three Broomsticks from here.”

You laughed at his justification, not once since you’d started dating had he made a single decision without considering how it’d involve and affect you.

Cupping a hand on his shoulder and leaning up on your tippy toes, he ducked down closing the distance, allowing you to kiss his cheek sweetly.

“Hm, I have such a caring daddy. How’d I ever get so lucky?” You remarked with fond smile, turning back to the chore of clearing your work table.

Just as you closed your kit, you felt him lifting you over his shoulder, a firm arm hooked around your thighs.

“Oh! What are you doing!?” You tried not to scramble, desperately clawing at the back of his coat to keep you from slipping.

“Well, Hogsmeade’s canceled now, love. But don’t worry, we’ll still have plenty of fun.”

Calling Sirius “Daddy” for the first time:

“Don’t make such a put-out face, Y/N. I didn’t say no, I just said you’d have to wait.” He rolled his eyes dismissively at your severe pout, turning back to the unfinished Transfiguration essay on the table in front of him.

You looked down at your lap sadly, kicking your feet aimlessly and picking at your fingernails. His timing was impeccable. The exact minute you’d randomly slipped into a fuzzy headspace, he’d decided it was ample time to start his homework.

Your thoughts were moving very slowly, but the main idea at the forefront of your mind, was that you wanted him. It didn’t matter if he spent an hour teasing you, you just wanted to feel him. To run you fingers through his hair- to moan his name.

“I-“ You began, only to be interrupted.

“Y/N, I don’t want to hear it right now. Let me at least finish the initial draft. Don’t start acting like a brat.” He hadn’t even bothered to look at you and this snapped the thin cord of patience you’d been weakly trying to maintain.

Suddenly it didn’t matter that you were in the library or that you were a seventh year and not a preschooler.

He hadn’t given you the only thing that seemed to matter at that second and you couldn’t help but let the tears spill. Cradling your face, you sobbed weakly, your hands shaking.

“Are you- What are you crying for?” He asked exasperatedly, causing you to cry a little harder at the thought of upsetting him.

“I’m sorry.” You whined helplessly, working yourself up into nervous hiccups. “Didn’t mean to make you angry. I just wanted you, Daddy! Wanted to feel you in me.”

He tsked at your state, taking one good look at you before pulling you into his chest.

After a good minute of rubbing your back and reassuring you he wasn’t really cross with you, your sobs ceased and breathing evened. The only signs of your tantrum were your puffy eyes and the occasional hiccup.

“What did I tell you about looking so sorry for yourself.” He scolded mildly, tenderly yanking at your nose before moving to stand. Neatly collecting his parchment and quill set, he extended a broad hand your way.

“Cmon, dear. Let’s get you taken care of.”

#the marauders #the marauders x reader #remus lupin x reader #remus lupin #james potter #james potter x reader #sirius black #sirius black x reader #harry potter #harry potter smut #harry potter imagine #harry potter blurb #hp #hp blurb #hp imagine

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taekooktimeline · 2 years

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Hi everyone! I hope you’re all doing well💜

I feel like I say I’m not happy with my posts quite a bit, but the four I just uploaded are not as detailed. I’m heading to Hawaii next week for a much needed vacation and I wanted to cross off as much as I could before because I know when I come back my personal life will be hectic. I hope they are satisfactory enough in archiving the closeness and cuteness of Taekook🥰

Another thing that I thought I’d take the time to address - I think most people know at this point, but I have suffered with anxiety my entire life. My mind is my own worst enemy. I always find something to fixate on and be worried about, without fail. Even now, typing this makes me anxious! It’s so silly and frustrating. I’ve been writing a lot more recently, thanks to the encouragement of two dear friends, and that has helped as a distraction + studying Japanese takes my mind off things too.

The point I wanted to make with this is - I didn’t ever expect the timeline to blow up to the level it did. It blows my mind and I’m humbled by the support and response. It has been over 2 years since it was launched. Time flies! Of course, with the passage of time I look back and see things I think I could have worded better, but I’ve come to learn a lot of writers feel that way so I try not to think about it too much💜

Because I didn’t expect the blog to get as much attention as it did, my name and face are out there. Whereas a lot of people have the luxury of anonymity on platforms like twitter, I don’t. At this point I can’t change it so I just continue to upload sporadic personal updates because it is what it is now.

But due to that, and my anxiety, it means I’m a lot quieter. I tend to quietly like and RT posts. I love sassy, fiery Taekookers and do my best to like their posts as much as I can. But that’s just not my personal style as far as how I operate on platforms, to tweet and be loud. I admire those who do soooo much, and I have quite a few moots who do this and their tweets are favorites to read. I’m not going to apologize, though, because I’m quiet compared to others. I overthink things to the point even my simple tweets get read by three or four friends before I post. I highly doubt anyone else is like this! My mind works against me + I’ve seen people canceled for misconstrued things, and I’ve seen good friends doxed for an opinion, an opinion, which everyone is entitled to have, whether you agree or not, and it’s scary and disturbing. There’s life outside of Kpop and being online among strangers, but not for some people, sadly, and they have no problem taking their hateful hearts and malicious intents and harming people’s personal lives.

When I went to Vegas, harmless posts of me at the concert with a friend, taken by another friend + me posting my Taekook outfit, had hateful people quote tweeting us threatening violence. It was alarming, and it was sad. I still see those photos circulating with not so nice words. It’s disappointing people can be so vile over things like headbands (and it wasn’t just us wearing hybrid headbands). We made sure to enjoy the concert anyway, to not let their words have power over us. We didn’t spend that time and money for online keyboard trolls to ruin it. But it was not pleasant to see, tougher to get out of that negative headspace and enjoy the concert and it was a reminder I’m not interested in engaging with hateful people online.

I’m also tired of fandom police who think they should tell you who you should or shouldn’t follow, but that’s a complaint for another day.

I’d rather quietly and happily update my blog, tweet once in a while, and hype my moots who are loud. That’s my style. I barely even update on my personals on other platforms because it just gets to me. It shouldn’t. But it does. Anxiety just works that way. That’s just who I am. I’m here to support Taekook, not the people of the internet, and that means I’m going to support them in the way that is best for my mental health. The timeline takes up a lot of time, and I think some people fail to realize that. A 10 min video can easily take an hour to watch, draft, review and post, and I’m doing that in my free time, for free, because I want to and enjoy it. For me, my support comes from archiving their beautiful, precious moments. It may not be loud in the way some people tweet, but if we measured off of time and energy than I’d certainly be up there. I support in a different way is all.

Also - I think I’ve said this before, but I’m not in DMs, and haven’t been in quite some time. I hope no one finds this rude and I hope you understand. I’m very busy, more than anything. Plus, I don’t feel the need to be a temporary bandaid for someone’s insecurities or worries. Just believe what you like and don’t worry about what others think or say. I’m just here to support Taehyung and Jungkook, individually and together. And I believe, because they’re intrinsically good, humble people, beautiful inside and out, with so much talent, that the universe will always move in the favor. The rest - people’s negativity for instance - is background noise to me💜

I’m sorry if any of this disappoints people, and if someone has some sort of expectation of a level of loudness or response (on twitter for instance), but I’m under no obligation and I’m not going to feel pressured.

If this seems random, it’s because I’m tired of the occasional comment about it, and I wanted to address it. I hope you can understand.

All the love, Kayla💜

#taekook #taekooktimeline #asks #discussions

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hollyhomburg · 3 years

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Color me pretty

(Bts Little space au)

Summary: When it came to the littles, the caregivers knew there was no better activity than coloring.

Tags: SFW, implied bts x reader, pure fluff, little space, little! kookie, Little! m/c, Caregivers! bts,

W/c: 1.5k

A/n: If you don’t like this kind of content please just skip over it and pay it no mind! this is very sweet and fluffy. this can be read alone, but i did use the characters from my other little space ask au titled ‘the peanut butter to my jelly’ it’s linked at the end of the fic! i wrote this drabble in one sitting!

- On the nights that Koo and the m/c are non-verbal but still feeling energetic enough to need stimulation the caregivers have a special little ritual that they like to do.

- it’s something tucked away, always ready to have on hand when they need it, it never fails to calm an overly excited or sugar high little; the blanket made out of a special material that can be washed after it’s doodled on, painted, and made new.

- On those special days, the caregivers bring around all their ‘messy blankets’ the fort making supplies that no one minds if they get ruined, if koo gets his apple sauce on it or if a sippie mistakenly gets it’s lid taken off. they make a nest in the living room with markers and crayons and they’re allowed to get the blanket as colorful as possible.

- The blanket is magic in the littles eyes! filled with simple flowers that they can color in as many times as they want! All the laundry fairy (Taehyung) has to do is pop the blanket in the washer and voila! it’s all ready for more coloring! no more marker marks.

- I just picture her and Koo stretched out on it with half of their stuffed animals for “moral support” while cartoons play in the background coloring to their hearts content. Koo gets a little younger in his headspace sometimes than the m/c though they’re pretty equal in general.

- Eventually koo just gets so small that he forgoes coloring all together, instead busying himself with sucking on the end of a marker. while the m/c just giggles with her tongue hanging out, swinging her feet, the picture of adorable concentration as she struggles to keep her pink marker inside the lines.

- Occasionally one of the caregivers will come in to check on them. And they’d come pet over their heads and koo and the m/c just excitedly gesture to the mess they’ve made! their brains too cottony to make many words other than “flower! made’ pink!!!” koo in his little sing song voice going “flower flower flower~”

- And whichever caregiver who is on “baby duty” will praise them, today it’s yoongi who takes a second to sit, each of the littles tucked under an arm. yoongi leaning in close and tracing his finger along their pretty lines. “you guys got so far today! almost all of them are filled!” he loves how puffed up both of your chests get at the praise.

- He can almost tell how far down they were when they first started coloring. on the outside border the flowers are carefully patterned, but the ones just under where you where sitting are full of wilds scribbles. Yoongi reminds himself to take a picture before they wash it, wanting to save a memory of today.

- “Oh did you make this for us little ones? I bet Joonie’s going to love it you know how much he loves nature! and you even gave each of them little stems.”

- And of course, eventually they find the m/c and koo are asleep in their little puddle of markers. Maybe the m/c has a little bit of purple splotch on her cheek. After they wake them up to put them to bed she whines softly when they clean it off her cheek “oh you poor fussy baby, don’t worry it will only take a second” her cute pout demanding a kiss for every rub.

- Eventually she presses into bed and koo kisses the faintly red spot on her face. his kiss a little wet and open mouthed but so innocent it makes the caregivers bookending them on either side coo. it’s as much of a sorry as koo can articulate right now. his mind feels like marshmellows and stuffed animals, like a too squeezed juice pouch and an empty packet of fruit snacks. totally devoid of big scary thoughts.

- The caregivers are glad they made the decision to throw out all and every permanent marker in the house after the last little incident when Koo decided that people were a viable canvas. I think their whole house would be full of little doodles from the two littles. When they get big they always blush and say that they don’t need to pin them to every available surface. But the caregivers just shush them because they honestly love their drawings.

-To the caregivers, their collection of drawings is a representation of the love they have for their two youngest. A mark of a healthy relationship- that they can give love in a way that matters to the two of them. Maybe jimin gets a tattoo of one of their flowers, a little purple one for koo and a pink one for the m/c on his hip at once point.

- Maybe one day the m/c has what they affectionately call a ‘tiny day’ where she’s small and can’t seem to snap out of it. she tries valiantly, but after that catch her pouting down at her coffee and staring wistfully at her stuffy on the bed they tell her it’s okay. she can be small today and they’ll handle all of the big thoughts.

- Of course they can’t stay home because they have a track due soon, and alas they are adults, so certain things have to be accounted for. There have been many times that the m/c has had to pretend to be at least a little big in public, luckily for the caregivers their littles are always remarkably well behaved.

- They treat it as a game, today, bunny is a secret agent and cannot be discovered by anyone, sent to protect the princess. Nothing can happen to her as long as bunny’s there. But no one can see bunny- or else his powers are nullified. It does the trick. They love to see her nodd seriously when Tae weaves the story for her. it makes their heart hurt when they catch her talking to the bunny. “i gots you.” it makes it so hard to seperate from her for the day.

- Seokjin packs up a day bag and gets her in the comfiest clothes possible and she spends the whole day quietly coloring in the corner of Joonie’s studio with her favorite bunny stuffie in her lap. She’s always careful to tuck him under her blanket and hide him whenever someone comes knocking, pretending to tap away on Namjoon’s tablet, but luckily no one pays her much mind, used to her presence.

- When the noise and the stimulation gets too much for her namjoon puts her in a pair of noise canceling headphones that play soft nature sounds and pretty soon when he turns around to check on her he finds she’s nodded off in his couch. And he gets up to fix the blanket around her before he goes back to work for a few more hours.

- She’s still asleep when the others finish up and decide to pry joonie away from work (a feat in itself) and when the others softly knock at the door she gets up, all bleary-eyed and honestly half-asleep rubbing at her eyes with a closed fist. almost tripping in happiness when she sees jungkook. hitting into his chest with a little ooof, almost tripping to get out of her blanket. So excited to see him- her favorite playmate “Koo play now!? koo get tiny!!!??”

- Already the stress is weighing on Jungkook’s shoulders, his eyes getting all misty when he sees her bunny and the blanket and just wants to regress so bad. He starts to help her clean up the day bag but seokjin and Namjoon ease him away from it.

- “You’ve got to watch her for us Kookie, can you do that? can you be a good boy?” by now they know how to softly nudge Jungkook into his headspace and it does the trick, lets him have a task before he can truly let go. they end up giggling softly with their foreheads pressed up against each other, telling stupid little jokes that are no doubt from jin and playing with each others hands.

- On the ride Home, they both hold onto one of bunnies ears in the backseat of their car. Their heads loling by the time they pull into their safe underground parking garage ready for some snuggles and probably a nice relaxing bath for kookie because he hates feeling sweaty from practice when he’s little. He Just wants to sit and play with some bubbles and bath toys while someone runs shampoo through his hair, the soft-smelling kind that's meant for babies.

- Inevitably Koo always looks up from his bubble bath and points at himself and says “baby?” Hobi nods sagely while smoothing his hair into a goofy mohawk, “baby” he agrees.

- But that’s not exactly true- the better term would be ‘their babies’

~Fin~

Please reblog and comment! Likes are nice- but they do little to support content creators!

(You can find more little space content here)

#bts x reader #bts little space #bts age regression #jungkook x reader #bts fluff #bts comfort #little space #bts littlespace #bts #bts fanfic #bts au #bts poly au #jeon jungkook x reader #bangtan sonyeondan #sfw bts

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howdoyousleep3 · 4 years

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Bucky and Daddy Steve in quarantine...how do they cope?

Yes amazing incredible brilliant I have been waiting for this question.

Let’t talk feelings:

Steve is torn. Half of him is like, “thank fuck I can finally be home” and the other half of him is hella anxious about being able to do his job well away from the office

He is always a man with a plan but everything being up in the air and in question does not sit well with Steve. He knows he has to stay calm and has to shoulder the responsibility of having to look after Bucky.

Bucky is freaking out. He cries when his classes get cancelled and when he realizes he has to take it seriously and not see Natasha. He worries about his family back in Indiana but his mom calls him almost every day for the first week because he is in New York fucking City

Bucky knows rough times are ahead and knows that he needs to brace for them and make plans and lists for what to do if things get bad for him mentally

Work and School:

Steve and communication!!!! He knows they need to talk about what they both need to stay on top of their work. Steve needs longer periods of time without interruptions and he needs to work in his office to feel focused. Bucky needs some sort of schedule, needs to be told when to take a break, and also needs a space to focus

Steve makes Bucky a cute little work space in the kitchen at the table because of the windows and light. He sets up a little speaker, and shows Bucky the snacks he bought for him, got a little picture frame with a picture of the two of them within it.

Steve wakes Bucky up around 7 each morning, slow wake-ups, makes sure coffee is ready. They agree to eat lunch together at noon each day, agree that the stopping point for each day is 4 PM.

Working from home is a bitch for Steve. He’s so used to having his people and his resources all in one spot and to not makes things harder.

School for Bucky is also a bitch. He finds himself not being able to stay on top of his workload at first and the temptation to move to the couch is far too high and almost constant

They’re both far too tempted by the other being within seconds of them

They get the hang of things but there are good days and there are bad days (Hell Zone Days) and they never really know how it’s going to turn out.

How to Stay Busy:

The typical answer-- Netflix. They find some shows to binge and some new movies to watch. Bucky introduces Steve to Parks and Rec and Steve makes a valiant attempt at showing Bucky the Fast and Furious movies.

Bucky FaceTimes Nat often, mostly to work together, but it’s absolutely necessary that he talk to her and see her face

Steve buys a lot of puzzles and Bucky tries, he really tries, but he hates them, detests them, can’t understand how Steve can keep looking at the same pieces over and over again trying to figure out where they go

Bucky loves playing Animal Crossing, even buys Sims and gets back into that

Steve works out every morning, runs on the treadmill in the basement, lifts some weights, same ‘ol. Sometimes Bucky will take a break and do some yoga, stretching after sitting for so long, which Steve finds so deliciously distracting

They both start to find a love for being in the kitchen. They’ve both always had it but have grown so used to eating out. Steve loves planning and preparing these crazy delicious dinners and Bucky groans about how he’ll need to start working out with Steve in order to maintain his weight

Bucky prefers to bake, likes the weighing of ingredients and how meticulous it is, likes that focus. It’s Steve’s turn to gripe about how he’s going to have to up his workout in the morning, in length and weight, but Bucky tells him he might be more than okay if Daddy got a little thicker

Relationship:

There are sweet times, so much extra time for sexy times: lunch break blowjobs, lazy couch sex, rimming in the shower. So much extra time to take things long and slow and it’s seriously the best.

This is quite the test for the two of them. They have never had such a prolonged period of time spent together. It is natural that they butt heads a bit.

They get into the stupidest fights. Steve would get irritated that Bucky won’t separate lights and darks when he does laundry or leaves coffee cups in the sink. Bucky would get upset at Steve for being so calm and relaxed and for leaving his sweaty towels piled up in the bathroom.

They’d raise their voices, Steve trying to stay as calm as possible, knows that Bucky has been hanging on by a thread. Steve would have no choice but to walk away and Bucky would pout, take an hour, go back to Steve’s office and climb into his lap, whispering his apologies. Steve wouldn’t let him apologize, saying it’s his fault, and they’d go back and forth with kisses and coos.

But there’s one point where Bucky’s anxiety gets so bad even Steve doesn’t know what to do and he resorts to something they’ve never tried before--

Shibari:

Steve’s had this set of navy blue ropes he bought within two weeks of dating Bucky but they’ve never gotten around to properly use them but there isn’t a better time

Bucky had two panic attacks yesterday, one of them Steve walked in on while the other Bucky came to him, and Bucky hasn’t ever had his anxiety this high while with Steve

He’s at a loss and hurting, can’t watch Bucky hurt anymore

He doesn’t consult Bucky, makes the decision for the two of them when Bucky is on the cusp of another attack one afternoon. Luckily, Bucky has grown comforted by Steve’s touch when he gets this way, so Steve pulls him close, carries him to their bedroom, lays him out on the bed

“I’m gonna do something, Buck, somethin’ we’ve never done before. It’s gonna help you and me and make you feel better. What do you say if you want it to stop? S’good, sugar. You trust me? Yeah? I want you to take your clothes off, fold them, and put them on that chair.”

Bucky barely reacts to the ropes, Steve having to pull his bottom lip out of his mouth before it bleeds. Steve is a little nervous, hasn’t done this in a while, never with Bucky, but it feels different now that so much rests on his own shoulders

Steve tells Bucky he loves him, makes Bucky say it back even though he doesn’t need to force it, takes his shirt off, and begins

The motions come back to Steve like he had never taken a break from this in so long, makes him almost miss it...

He’s gentle when he moves Bucky, when he makes his knots, kisses at his soft skin before crossing rope over it.

Bucky starts to leave him almost immediately, always soft for Daddy’s hands on his body, but there’s never been something that stays behind after Daddy’s hands leave him like this.

“You goin’ sweet on me already, sugar? A’course, Buck that’s great, s’all okay, baby. I got ya, always got ya...”

He rolls Bucky onto his front, wraps and ties and knots an intricate pattern to ensure Bucky’s arms are restrained to his sides, curled at the elbow behind his back. When he rolls Bucky back onto his front he gives him a few sweet kisses on a slack mouth, tells Bucky he loves him again

By the time Steve has connected the ropes around his front, hooking the crease of his hips, his thighs, the rope is cradling Bucky’s cock but not restraining his thighs in any way (not for his first time)

And Steve is worried he’s going to blow from arousal and adoration

He can’t remember a time Bucky has looked more beautiful. He looks like an angel almost, navy blue rope on creamy skin on a backdrop of crisp white sheets.

Bucky’s hard and Steve is almost certain Bucky isn’t aware of it. His eyes are half-open, lips curled up at the corners, cheeks flushed. Steve isn’t sure he’s seen Bucky so gone.

Steve’s never been so in love

He’s bends and kisses his way up Bucky’s chest, his neck, his lips. “You good, sweetheart?” he whispers in Bucky’s ear and barely feels the tick of a nod, barely hears the breathy slur of an “Uh-huh...”

And thus Steve picks up another Quarantine hobby

Drawing Bucky while he’s tied up and at his mercy and so fucking beautiful

He pulls up a chair next to the bed and digs around in the closet for an old sketchpad, finds a pencil, and sits there and sketches Bucky in such a vulnerable position

He sits there for almost two hours and sketches Bucky, periodically moving him into different positions to ensure he’s still floaty and to draw him in another fashion. He gives him sweet kisses and whispers how pretty Bucky looks and sits back into his chair

He misses sketching, misses Shibari, wonders if Bucky will want to do this in the future. (Answer: he does)

After Steve has moved him into four different positions, has a bit of a hand cramp, he moves back to the bed and joins Bucky naked, crawls over his form, kisses at his chest, his nipples.

He’s been more than half-hard for over two hours now, Bucky having been sporting an angry erection almost the entire time, and when he brings his hand to curl around Bucky’s cock Bucky makes such a soft noise Steve thinks he might tear up

“Want you to come, Buck. Want you come knowing that I love you and that you’re okay and that you’re the strongest and most beautiful human being I’ve ever fucking met--”

Bucky starts coming before Steve even finishes his first sentence, doesn’t make any noises except for a heavy exhale that almost resembles a whine, the tiniest grin on his lips

Steve gets a hand on himself as soon as he can, is still whispering to Bucky how much he loves him and adores him and finds him beautiful and how perfect he is and adds to the mess already on Bucky’s stomach, his chest

They talk about this experience for the both of them in the bath later:

Steve lets Bucky ask questions. Had Steve done this before? Was Bucky’s reaction “normal”? Will it always put him in that headspace? Was it supposed to feel that good?

Bucky liked it so much it makes him nervous, wonders if it could happen again, worries there might be a chance of him relying on it too much, has never felt more relaxed in his entire goddamn life.

Steve tries to tell Bucky how it made him felt, how breathtaking it was for Steve, how much he loved seeing Bucky give into him and his pleasure and to watch his worries leave his body.

They agree to explore it in the future, especially after Bucky hears Steve went lighter, used bonds and a pattern that were simple, but they both agree that it shouldn’t become and extremely frequent thing, just when they both are in the correct headspace for it.

Steve shows Bucky his sketches that evening, Bucky gasping and blushing at seeing himself in such a way, shocked that Steve is so talented. But he’s surprisingly aroused, that sweet space still tingly in his mind, and tucks into Steve’s neck, tells him he loves him.

“I love you too, sugar...”

I am so fucking sorry this is like the longest answer I’ve ever given, wowow. I’ve never written them doing this and it totally got away from me!

#askK

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ghostboybabies · 4 years

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little ghost boy || [JATP Agere/CGLRE]- “Panic Attacks and Secrets” (Chapter 8)

A/N: been planning *this* plot point for a while. Hope y'all enjoy.

Reggie panics and involuntarily regresses after a nightmare, Alex meets up with Willie at a skatepark when band practice is cancelled, and Reggie makes a big decision.

Reggie wanted Luke.

Now.

He couldn't breathe. Or at least, it felt that way. He didn't remember what was so scary about his dream at first, all he knew is that it upset him.

Tears ran down his face as he sobbed, sniffling. He sat up, taking in his surroundings. He was in Julie's bed. He didn't recall why, but he was glad he had the stuffed bear Julie gave him for comfort.

He knew that he was very little but he didn't care. This was to much for him. And he needed Luke.

"Reggie, it's time to get up for band practice-"

Reggie heard Julie's voice as she opened the door, speaking casually until she got a glance of him. "Oh my god, Reg! What happened?" She shut her door behind her, and quickly came to sit next to him on the bed.

She had let him nap in her room because he had stayed up late the night before doing something, planning to come wake him up before band practice.

Reggie shook his head, closing in on himself and squeezing the bear. "Mama!" Reggie cried, babbling over his words. He panicked, his breathing becoming more quickened and panicky.

"Baby, I need you to breathe for me. Like me, okay?" Julie continued to breathe in deeply, and then out. Reggie nodded, attempting to follow her lead. She didn't care that he was little at a bad time, she just wanted him to be okay. Julie didn't ask for an explanation, nor did she question what was going on. In the moment, she just did everything she could to help him calm down.

She continued on, muttering praise and reassurance until his breathing was more level. "Bad dream, mama! Scary and I wan Luke..." he whined, still sniffling.

"It's okay, baby," Julie opened her arms, letting him hug her. He snuggled into her chest, hugging her tightly. "And I'll see if I can get Luke for you, yeah?"

"Band pwactice?" Reggie pulled away, tilting his head. "Gotta be big."

"No, you don't. You just had some sort of panic attack and that's what this is for, remember? To deal with your mental health and emotions."

Reggie nodded, and Julie continued. "We don't have a gig for a week, we'll come up with another time to practice. And...I'll come up with something to tell Alex. You just play with your stuffie, okay?"

Reggie picked the bear back up from the bed, hugging it and nodding. Julie's breathing exercise and affection helped comfort him a bit, but he still didn't feel well. He wanted Luke.

Luke's comfort seemed so important in the moment due to the contents of his dream. The nightmare made him afraid of losing Luke, and he needed to know that he wouldn't.

Julie leaned forward and kissed his forehead. Reggie hugged the stuffed animal, trying to focus on keeping his breathing level for the time being, watching his Mama leave the room.

"Julie!" Luke cheered once Julie entered the studio, dropping his smile when he saw how serious she looked. "Where's Reggie?"

"I need to talk to you," Julie said, in a serious tone that scared him a bit. . Luke lifted his guitar over his head, going over and setting it on his stand.

"I'll be back." He told Alex, following Julie out of the studio and leaving the blonde very confused. Once they were outside, and the garage doors were shut behind him, he spoke aloud, questioning what was going on.

"What's up, Jules?"

"Reggie had a panic attack," Julie sighed, seemingly worried. "He said something about a bad dream and he's very little and he's asking for you. Can we cancel band practice? Can you please go spend some time with him?" Julie pleaded. She was really worried.

"Of course...I'll tell Alex that Reggie had a nightmare but leave out the details. He used to get them pretty bad, about his parents and stuff, and he'd be sensitive after. I'm sure he won't think anything of it," Luke decided, nodding. "I'll talk to Reggie, and then we can all do something as a distraction for him, okay?"

"Sounds like a plan." Julie confirmed, still on-edge.

"Hey," Luke spoke softly to her, picking up on her stress. "He's gonna be okay. We'll figure this out."

Julie hummed, nodding. "Yeah...thanks for that." She thanked him for the comfort, and Luke smiled.

"Of course."

"Nightmares? I feel so bad...I thought those went away," Alex frowned, worried for his friend. "Can I see him? I used to help him when he had them when we were alive."

"No!" Julie said, immediately. She awkwardly chuckled, "We got this. You go hang out with Willie or something, and we can all hang out later tonight." she compromised. Julie understood that Alex was worried and tried to come up with a solution that would allow him to see Reggie, without exposing him for being an age regressor.

"O-okay, yeah. You sure you got this?" Alex looked to Luke, who nodded. "When I come back, can we talk all about something?" Alex asked.

"Uh, yeah. Whatever you want, just not right now." Luke wasn't really worried about whatever he was planning to bring up, just trying to get him out so that he could go help his baby.

Alex nodded, setting his drumsticks down and stepping away from the drum set. Luke gave him a soft smile, before poofing out as Julie exited through the door. Alex didn't know what was up, but he was worried.

It seemed like Luke was always trying to keep him out of the house, and while he loved spending time with his boyfriend, he was missing his friends too. But he was kinda thankful about it, because they never questioned why he was gone all the time, they just seemed to be glad that he wasn't in the house to discover whatever they were keeping from him.

They were hiding something from him, but he was hiding something too. It wasn't his secret to tell anyways. It was Willie's.

He figured that he should go check on the boy in question anyways. With everything going on, Willie was always pretty stressed. Hiding a relationship from the person who owns your soul will do that to you. He poofed out, appearing on a bench at a empty skate park.

How long would it be before it hit them that their secrets were exactly the same? At least, Willie and Reggie's were.

"Luke!" Reggie made grabby hands towards his friend the moment he appeared in the room. Luke came forward, leaning down to hug him without making him get up from the bed. Reggie cuddled into his chest. "Scary dream, Luke! You didn't wanna be friends anymore- and Julie left too. And Alex-" he started rambling, working himself back to tears again.

"Baby, none of us would ever leave you, okay? I know nightmares can be scary but they're not real. " Luke assured, kissing the top of Reggie's head softly. "None of us are going anywhere, I promise you."

He let go of Reggie, letting him settle back into the bed. "I heard you kinda panicked. Are you feeling okay?" Luke sat on the bed next to him, hearing the door open as Julie entered. She didn't interrupt, closing the door behind her and taking her spot on the other side of Reggie as he replied.

"Still sad." he mumbled, shaking his head. "Don't wanna lose you," he said.

"I know, baby. You won't," Luke repeated. Julie seemed concerned. "Do you wanna tell Mama what the dream was about?"

Reggie turned to Julie, bringing his thumb to his lip. "Lost Luke, and yous, and Alex. Didn't wanna be friends anymore," he pouted.

"Poor baby," Julie opened his arms, letting him hug her. "Luke's right, we're not going anywhere. I can promise you that, Little Prince."

Reggie hummed, cuddling into her too. "Hey, Rockstar?" Luke asked after a minute of just them hugging. Reggie pulled away from Julie, tilting his head as he looked over at him. "Will a movie make you feel a bit better?" Luke asked.

Reggie shrugged. "We could watch Winnie the Pooh!" Julie suggested, in a excited tone that made Reggie really wanna watch it. He pouted though, shaking his head. "Why not, Flower?"

"Makes me littler," he mumbled shyly, his face a little pink.

Luke gave an amused smile. "And exactly how big are you right now?" he questioned in a teasing tone.

"Dunno," Reggie pouted. "Not a baby," he decided.

"Hmm, well...does Winnie the Pooh make you happy?" Julie interrupted, joining back in on the conversation. Reggie nodded slowly. "Then what does it matter if it triggers a younger headspace? You're allowed to be little, even if 'little' is very young."

Reggie seemed hesitant to agree, but Julie leaned forward and kissed him on the forehead, distracting him from whatever he was going to say. "I'll set up the show. Julie, is there any way to get more blankets so that the baby is more comfy? We can build a little pillow fort!"

Reggie bounced it place. "Yeah, Mama, can we?"

Julie rolled her eyes, playfully glaring at Luke, chuckling a bit. "Yeah, I'll see what I can do. Reggie, you can be my little helper!"

"That's a very important job, mister." Luke said playfully. Reggie nodded, seeming determined to help Julie with whatever she needed. Julie stood up, reaching out her hand for Reggie to take.

What Reggie needed right now was a distraction. And Julie and Luke were providing just that. They always seemed to know what he needed and how to help him.

And Reggie would always be thankful for that.

Alex poofed onto a bench in an empty skate park, looking around for Willie.

"Alex!" Willie cheered, stopping his skateboard in front of the bench. He sat down next to him. Alex still had no idea how they were always able to correctly guess where the other was most of the time. It was weird.

"Hey, Willie," Alex chuckled at his excitement. "How are you?"

"Not little, if that's what you're getting at," Willie told him. "Actually though, I'm pretty okay at the moment! I've been skating and just hanging out. You?"

"Well, I was supposed to practice with the band today but then they cancelled it because of Reggie. He was pretty shaken up after a nightmare, they wouldn't let me see him for some reason." Alex explained.

"It sounds like they're hiding something related to Reggie from you. Do you have any ideas on what it could be?" Willie frowned, sitting back in the bench and getting settled.

"Actually, I think I might."

"Go on," Willie seemed interested.

"At first I thought it was just a weird Reggie thing- but on Halloween night, I caught Reggie sleeping and sucking his thumb. I-i think he might be like you," Alex seemed hesitant, like he wasn't completely sure.

"I mean, I think that's possible. You said that he deals with anxiety too, right? And that he didn't have the best childhood?"

Alex nodded in affirmation. "Those are both two things people can use age regression to deal with."

Alex nodded again, "There's so many other things too. I was thinking it in the back of my mind since you told me about you a month ago, but I didn't know for sure. He will disappear with either Julie or Luke, or both, for extended periods of time. Whenever I come home, one of them will distract me until the other two come back, and Reggie always is kinda shy."

"Like I am when I come out of littlespace," Willie connected.

"Yeah, I don't know, but I do think it's possible. Either way, I'm gonna ask them about it tonight, see if I can figure out what they're keeping from me." Alex ran his fingers through his hair. "But while I'm here, do you wanna do something?"

"I-i know I said I wasn't little-"

"You can be if you want." Alex cut him off, smiling at him. Willie smiled back, nodding.

"Okay. Cool. Can we go to the park?" Willie was thankful. He could only ever feel comfortable being little away from the club, and it was much easier to be a kid when you had someone to play with.

"Of course."

"Luke! Look at all the blankies we got!" Reggie giggled, coming over to Julie's bed and dumping a pile of soft blankets on the bed. He looked so proud of himself for helping, even though it was obvious that Julie carried more and did all the work.

"Whoa! Those are a lot! You must be so strong, baby."

Reggie blushed a little bit. He was still getting used to the praise thing. Instead of pointing out things he did wrong, or getting mad at him, they made a point to tell him what he did well. While softly correcting and helping him improve in spots he could do better. Instead of 'You're not good enough', it was 'You're amazing, and we're gonna help you be even better'.

"Now you get to help me set this up! I don't know how we're gonna do a fort though..." she trailed off, looking around her room. "We could pull the chair over here, and use the stool to create a roof? Just drape the blanket across it and set up on the floor?"

They eventually figured out the blanket fort thing, setting it up on the ground. They all cuddled up inside of it, Reggie sitting between his friends with the computer on his lap. Reggie was definitely right about the show making him littler.

He was sucking on his thumb and cuddling both his bear and Luke. Julie had been the one mainly taking care of Reggie the past few times he regressed, and he seemed to want Luke now. That dream spooked him, and out of the two people he trusted, he wanted the one he knew longer. Julie didn't take offence to that, just glad that he was feeling better.

Reggie kept giggling at the movie, but he eventually fell back asleep against Luke. Luke reached forward,pressing the spacebar on the laptop to pause the show once he was sure the baby was sleeping. "We should let him get some more sleep. He can stay in the pillow fort, though." Luke suggested.

Julie nodded, "The crying probably tired him back out. We can let him sleep for a while and hopefully he'll be big when he wakes up."

Luke nodded a bit in response, closing the laptop and setting it aside, working to carefully lay Reggie down without waking him up. He stirred a bit at the last minute, whining. "No go.." Reggie mumbled sleepily. He fell back asleep basically immediately, but Luke's heart melted.

"Julie, he's so adorable-"

"I know, but if you spend a million years cooing over him, we're never gonna come up with something to tell Alex."

Luke rolled his eyes, proceeding to climb out of their little fort, followed by Julie.

Little did they know, there was no need to lie to Alex. They'll figure it out eventually.

"I have to go home, kiddo. I'm sorry," Alex looked at the pouty kid in front of him, frowning a bit.

"But Awex!" Willie whined. "Wanna keep playin'."

Alex smiled a bit at his mispronunciation of his name, "I know, Little One. But we can always play later, right?"

Willie nodded, casting his eyes down. "Mkay. I miss you."

"I'll miss you too, Willie." Alex opened his arms, letting the little hug him. Little Willie had an older headspace age then Little Reggie, for sure, but they were alike in many ways. When they eventually met, and interacted in littlespace, it was undoubtedly going to be an absolutely adorable sight to see.

But of course, there were many things that needed to happen before they got there. Many secrets to be told. Many conversations to be had.

"Can you be a big kid for me, buddy? I know big Willie can take care of himself, I don't know about you, though."

Willie pouted, but he nodded nonetheless. "Be big after you leave, pwomise." he held out his pinky childishly.

Alex gave an amused smile, wrapping his pinky around his. "I know it's hard to pull yourself out of headspace. It's okay."

After a moment of silence, Alex leaned forward, kissing Willie's forehead before smiling at him. "I'll see you later."

Willie hummed, stepping back as he poofed out. Willie frowned, sad that he was gone. He stepped back onto the playground, going over to the swings and taking a seat.

He had to be big before heading back to the club. Sometimes, Caleb wasn't the nicest person about the more childish part of him. Only sometimes, when things at the club weren't doing well and there was a lot going on. And Willie knew he had been pretty stressed after failing to possess a teenage boy for more then a few day. And getting yelled at for not being able to understand orders wasn't something on his 'to-do' list for today.

He was glad he got to spend some time with Alex, though.

"There, all the pillow fort stuff is put away. I think Alex will be heading back soon, though." Luke said, looking over to a nervous Reggie as he set one of Julie's pillows back in place on her bed.

"Are you sure you wanna tell him? We can come up with a lie." Julie offered, coming to sit next to him. Reggie shook his head a bit.

"I'm okay. I-i'm sure about this. Nervous out of my mind, but sure."

"Okay, Reg. Just let us know if you change your mind." Luke told him, sitting down as well.

"I will." Reggie assured, biting on his lip and bouncing his knee. He was very nervous. This was the first time he'd be willingly telling someone, and it was terrifying. He could still back out, but he didn't think he wanted to. He trusted Alex, and he knew somewhere, deep down, that he'd probably be okay with it.

The most he'd do is tease him playfully like Luke did. But it was still scary.

Alex walked through the door, talking about how he had gone to the studio to find them first. Reggie waited until he was done with his rambling, speaking up nervously.

"Alex, I have something to tell you..."

Was he really doing this?

A/N: Reblogs and asks with your thoughts/reactions to this chapter are very much appreciated! Thank you for reading!

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x--daughters-of-darkness--x · 4 years

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TAYLOR MOMSEN OF THE PRETTY RECKLESS ON HER BATTLE CRY FOR LIFE, “DEATH BY ROCK AND ROLL,” OVERCOMING TRAGEDY, AND HEALING THROUGH MUSIC

“Without this album, I don’t know where I would be right now, I don’t know if I would still be around. I was that low.” Death, tragedy, substance abuse – in the 4 years since her last album for The Pretty Reckless, to say Taylor Momsen has been through a lot would be an understatement. After the passing of her long time friend and collaborator, Soundgarden’s Chris Cornell, who tragically died while touring with the band, followed by the death of their producer Kato Khandwala, her album “Death By Rock and Roll” essentially became a lifeline for her, pulling her out of a deep depression, where she had lost all hope or desire to live. She was brought back by listening to her favorite heroes including The Beatles, Led Zeppelin, and The Who, while songwriting her way back to life. What has been borne out of her darkness is an incredibly mature sound, a more sophisticated look, and soulful personal awakening that has skyrocketed the album’s title track “Death By Rock and Roll” to No 1 on the radio charts. The full album was released on February 14th, hitting No 1 on iTunes in the United States, UK, Australia, Canada, and more.

The Pretty Reckless was never the average rock band by any means. Since forming in 2008 they have had the distinction of being the first female-fronted band to have back-to-back No. 1 singles at the active rock format and the first female-fronted act to have five No. 1 singles on the Billboard chart. Momsen’s last album “Going to Hell” released in 2016 crashed the Top 5 of the Billboard Top 200, including three No. 1 hits – a feat that had not been accomplished by a female-fronted group since The Pretenders in 1984. With over half-a-billion streams, The Pretty Reckless have headlined countless sold-out shows and toured with the likes of Guns N’ Roses. “Death By Rock and Roll” marks a new era for the band, as they continue to propel themselves forward despite the pandemic or any other obstacle that may have been in their way. “I think anytime you go through loss and trauma, and one hit after the other, when life is just feeling like it’s beating you down… it forces you to grow up whether you want to or not.” Momsen was “reborn” wiser and stronger, with the music literally “pouring” out of her, “I think that this album is really, in my humble opinion, the best album we’ve ever made because it was created from such a raw and vulnerable, honest place that you can’t manufacture…”

The Untitled Magazine’s Indira Cesarine caught up with The Pretty Reckless’s frontwoman Taylor Momsen for an in-depth exclusive about her personal journey from darkness and tragedy to healing through music, how she navigated making a new album and music videos amidst the pandemic, as well as what has inspired her latest tracks, new look, and fiery, raw new direction.

I love the title of your new album “Death by Rock and Roll,” what was the inspiration behind it?

“Death by Rock and Roll“ started out as a phrase that Kato, our producer who passed and who was my best friend in the world, used to say all the time. It was kind of an ethic that we lived our life by, back in 2008 when we formed the band. It was this code of “Death by Rock and Roll” which was not morbid at all – it came from a place of “ live life your own way, go out your own way, don’t let anyone tell you differently – rock and roll till I die..”. So it’s very much like a battle cry for life. And when he passed that phrase just kept ringing in my head and I couldn’t get it out. It just made a lot of sense. It was the start of this album. I can say this is probably the first album that I had titled before I had actually written all of the material for it.

I understand you had back-to-back tragedies in your life between Chris Cornell and your producer Kato Khandwala both passing, did those experiences impact the writing on the album?

100%. Not to immediately get very heavy, but there is no way to speak about this record without talking about it. We were on tour with Soundgarden which was just the most amazing experience of my life. I’m the biggest Soundgarden fan in the world so to be opening for them and to be on that tour was absolutely incredible and then to have it end so tragically – a shock is an understatement. We were all just devastated. We were still in the middle of touring at the time, we were promoting our last record and we had another year of touring planned. We played a few shows after that but I came to the conclusion that I wasn’t in a good headspace to be public – I couldn’t get on stage every night and fake my way through a show when I was dealing with my own personal grief. So I took a step back and I canceled everything. I needed to go home to process this in my own time and not in front of the entire world. So we did that and left touring – which was not the best business decision but it was something that I really needed to do. Chris’s passing really affected all of us deeply. Soundgarden was one of the reasons we all bonded in the first place over 10 years ago. It was The Beatles and Soundgarden – so we were all going through it together. I started to write again and I was calling them [the band] and I was saying we need to move forward, let’s get in the studio – I have a few songs I don’t know what they are for, I don’t know if it’s for a record or an EP or just maybe nothing but let’s start doing something.

As soon as we started to put those plans in motion I got the phone call that Kato had died in a motorcycle accident and that was just the fucking nail in the coffin for me. I couldn’t process it. I went extraordinarily downhill very quickly into this dark headspace of just depression and substance abuse and everything that comes along with loss and grief and trauma. I didn’t really know how to get out of it. I think the bigger thing is that I didn’t know if I wanted to. I had kind of thrown my hands up into the air and was like “I quit life”. I felt like “everything I love is dead, I don’t see a future here” and that’s a really dangerous headspace to be in. To make a very long story short it took months and months and months for me to wrap my head around it and I still don’t think I have my head wrapped around it fully, but I finally got to a place where I needed music. I had shunned music for a while just because everything I listened to – no matter what the band or what the artist was – brought back some sort of memory that I wasn’t equipped to deal with – it all brought back some sort of emotion which was just too painful.

I finally hit, I don’t want to say a rock bottom, but one of the bottoms. I needed music again so I started by listening to what made me love music in the first place – the simple answer was The Beatles. I started by listening to the Beatles again and basically started from the beginning to rebuild my love of music from scratch, from the start. I started by listening to all the Beatles records from front to back and delving into all the demos and then the anthology and from that, it turned into Led Zeppelin and The Who and Pink Floyd and eventually leading to me being able to listen to Soundgarden again and have it bring me some joy instead of just painful memories. That was the turning point for me. I eventually started to pick up a guitar.

This record is very different from our previous albums in the sense that I didn’t have to try to write it. It just poured out of me whether I wanted it to or not. It was like I opened the floodgates and this record was just born. Normally when you go to write a record or write anything you have to search for inspiration. It’s a very tortuous process – not knowing if it’s going to come or not. In this case, inspiration had been pounding me in the face and I had just been ignoring it and repressing it. So when I finally opened the floodgates it was like a dam being broken. That was really the start of the healing process where I just allowed it to flow. I wasn’t writing with any purpose, like thinking anyone would hear it, or even thinking far enough that we would even record these songs. It was just something I needed to do for my own catharsis and my own healing process. That was the start of getting my shit together or at least attempting to. So as cliché as it might sound, this music is my life. Without this album I don’t know where I would be right now, I don’t know if I would still be around. I was that low. So it really does prove the point that music saves – and it has healing power, unlike any other art form, in my opinion. I think that this album is really, in my humble opinion, the best album we’ve ever made because it was created from such a raw and vulnerable, honest place that you can’t manufacture and can’t duplicate.

So what was the first song that came out of you as you were working on it? Was it 25? What was the first track that got you rolling?

“25” was one of the first ones. It was kinda a combination. “Death by Rock and Roll” the song was something we had been working on and started writing 10 years ago but never finished. That was something we revisited early on. Finishing the lyrics and finishing writing that. But 25 was certainly the first song that I had really completed. I wrote the song when I was 24 and we recorded it right after I turned 25. It was the first song recorded for the record. That was a moment where I was in a very reflective state. It’s a very autobiographical song in a lot of ways. Just me looking back on my life. I think everyone does when they have a birthday coming up! And going through my life, where I’m at now. Even though it was written from a dark place it’s actually quite a hopeful song. It tells my life story in a metaphorical way. When I finished it, I took a step back and I looked at it and I went, I think that this might be really good, I think I might have just gotten way better. I think I might have taken a step forward in my writing. That was the start that spearheaded the rest of the record. “Death by Rock and Roll” and “25” are the two that we really started with.

Having been to your previous performances and familiar with your prior music, “25” seems like a far more mature song in many ways. It definitely seems like you’re coming from a place that’s, I don’t want to use the word “grown-up,” but it comes from a far more sophisticated point of view. And with the music video, I feel like you pushed your work in a more sophisticated direction than you have in the past. It definitely seems like a turning point for you, that song.

Thank you, and I think it certainly was. That came from just all the shit we went through, I think anytime you go through loss and trauma, and one hit after the other, when life is just feeling like it’s beating you down – that eventually your not living in a child’s mindset anymore. It forces you to grow up whether you want to or not. I feel like I grew. I aged quite a few years in a very short period of time, I guess if you want to put it that way. Cause you know when you’re confronted with death and things like that are so heavy and so real, there is no avoiding them even if you as much as you may try. It ages you. It’s just a part of life. I grew up exponentially. I don’t want to say quickly – you know I started at 24 and I’m now 27 – so it took a while, but in one way it feels like it was overnight. I think that is a huge part of that, just a lot of growth that happened in my own life very quickly that just made me start seeing things from a wiser, more grown-up perspective.

I would have to say considering you started working at the age of 2, you probably already have a more experienced view of the world than the average person. The average kid does not start working as a model and actor at 2 years old or go through the things that you went through at such a young age. If age were the sort of thing we could quantify based on experience and wisdom you probably are much older than your years.

I hear that a lot, it’s something people have told me throughout my life, “you’re so much older than your age.” I always take that with a grain of salt. Yeah, I’ve lived a very strange life. It’s not exactly average, and all of those experiences lead to who I am now. It’s all a combination of growth. I only know me so to compare myself with someone else in retrospect, it’s like well am I older or am I younger? Somedays I feel like I’m 107 and somedays I feel like I’m a 2-year-old child again. It kind of depends on the day. I never really know what I’m doing. I’m just kind of living and trying to constantly grow as a person and grow as an artist and just better everything that I do. If the last thing was great the next thing has to be better. If we were on tour and we had a great show the night before the next shows got to be better! We have to keep moving forward. I think as soon as you start to feel stagnant or you come to a conclusion that this is the best I can be, that is the death of an artist. You always have to be thinking ahead and thinking forward. As soon as you’re comfortable I feel like that’s the death of art right there.

Yeah art often comes from angst.

Yes, art comes from everywhere! Look at any artist and any sort of pain or trauma. It doesn’t always have to be negative. Positive things that have happened in one’s life, that all is a part of who you are and you have to indulge all sides of that. You have to draw from all aspects of life and sometimes that means going to the darker sides of life, subject matters that are uncomfortable to talk about. If you limit yourself in any way, like I’m just going to write about this side of things or that side of things, then you’re stunting yourself. And that’s never a good thing. You really have to be an open book which is sometimes difficult.

What is your process for writing songs, do you do it in solitude or do you work with the band while you’re writing?

There is no process! Believe me, I wish there was, it would make it a lot simpler. The only kind of constant is that Ben and I are the two songwriters of the band and we write separately but we always come together at the end. The only thing that is consistent is that it starts with an idea, and that has to be an inspired idea. It can’t be something that’s manufactured. I could sit down and craft you a song, but that’s not the kinda art that I want to put out into the world. I’m trying to make something that’s going to last a lifetime, an eternity, not something that’s just going to be a fleeting moment. That can be a struggle sometimes especially now we’re living in such a fast-paced world. Something comes out and people have already moved on before it’s been released. It’s a very A to Z society especially with social media and the way music is put out now. It’s very single-based. Call it old school if you want, I still very much love the album. To me, the album is the highest art form. An album encapsulates a moment in an artist’s life. Sometimes it’s a long moment, sometimes it’s a short one, but it encapsulates a time period. Cherry-picking songs and singles have always been a challenge for me because it doesn’t tell the whole story. You really have to listen to the whole album from front to back to get the whole picture. I can’t write with people. There’s a lot of people who do writing sessions where you sit in a room with lots of people and brainstorm ideas. That has never made sense to me. It takes isolation for me. It takes time with your own thoughts. Sometimes the song can come in 5 minutes and that’s amazing when that happens. Sometimes you spend months or years working on something. So there is no process. The only constant is that it’s me and Ben and we have a really symbiotic relationship that just works and that’s just a very lucky and fortunate thing where we’re always in sync with each other.

You can definitely tell that when the two of you are together. You don’t even need to speak, you can tell there is a sort of unspoken communication.

We definitely have that going on, and Kato was a part of that. He never wrote the songs, but he was a part of that kind of symbiotic relationship. When the band formed, I met Ben and Kato at the same time. When the three of us met it was just this kismet relationship that none of us were expecting. You meet a lot of people in life and none of us were expecting to all just click in this weird way. We felt like we had all known each other forever. In past lives, in future lives, like ‘I’ve known you my whole life’ and were just meeting. That’s something that is just so lucky. It was a very weird thing to lose him. It felt like losing a piece of myself because we were all so close. There wouldn’t be a Pretty Reckless if I had never met Kato. I met Mark and Jamie shortly after I met Ben and Kato, but he was essentially the fifth member of the band he just didn’t tour with us.

Let’s talk about your track “And So It Went,” which I understand is about the state of civil unrest. Tell me about the inspiration for the song as well as the video where you are wearing that awesome pink suit?

It’s kind of crazy looking back at it now. The song was written and recorded way before the pandemic, so it’s insane to me how relevant some of those lyrics are in particular to what’s going on in the world right now. I think that’s something that happens a lot in art. Does life imitate art? Does art imitate life? I think it’s probably a combination of both. That song came about a few years back when I was feeling like the world was starting to feel a little off. You could just kind of feel that tug where civil unrest was starting and the world was kinda starting to go crazy. So then I wrote about it. It’s very socially driven, the song itself. I don’t want to get too detailed into it. I don’t like doing that with songs because I think it’s unfair to the listener. I just think that it takes away an element. I always say the music is mine, it’s like my child and it’s mine. It’s my baby and I raised it and I gave birth to it and all those things. But once you put it out into the world it doesn’t belong to you anymore. It’s like sending a kid off to college or something – you have to say goodbye and you know I hope I did a good job but now it’s up to you. Since the album is just coming out I don’t want my personal take to take the song away from the listener. It doesn’t matter what it’s about to me anymore, it’s about how you relate to it and how you connect to it, and how you associate it with your own life. That’s the pinnacle right there. I think it’s strange to talk about music. It’s not meant to be talked about, it’s meant to be listened to and everything I have to say is within the song itself. I don’t really consider myself a good speaker, I’m a songwriter.

You are a very good speaker!

Thank you, but you know what I mean. Everything I’m thinking and my point of view is the way I see things. It’s all in the song that’s all right there for you to interpret but it’s not my place to preach my point of view at you.

With regards to the video, I noticed that you had these contrasting personalities – the persona in the pink suit with the crown and then the persona of you with the fishnet headgear. What was your inspiration in regards to those choices of styling? I felt like there must be something specific that you were going for?

I’m not entirely sure where all of that came from but I was really specific about it. I don’t know if it came in a dream, but I saw it in my head. Like my songs, I spend a lot of time conceiving them, as well as the videos and picturing what they should be. Then you get on set and you have to shove it all in one day. It’s a lot of prep work of me mentally working out what this video should look like and how it should flow. It’s always kind of a challenge, especially with rock music, to make a video that feels like the song. You don’t want to make something that overshadows the song and you don’t want to make something that’s completely contrasting to it. You want to make a visual representation that accentuates the music and is somehow entertaining but also makes you think and maybe listen to the song again and take it from a different perspective. I was going through and watching tons and tons of videos and was like ok, what are the best videos? it doesn’t matter the time period. I was watching a lot of Madonna and Micheal Jackson and epics like “Thriller”. Videos that were really the turning point in the music video game and how can we attempt to make something that is that visually entertaining and still hold the integrity of the music and really just put rock music back on the map again. It used to be something that was so powerful but that’s kinda dwindled over the years. I wanted to make the rock video something that was relevant again. That’s my goal with all the videos we’ve made and the ones we’re going to continue to make. To make something that holds artistic integrity and also is entertaining at the end of the day. The suit idea came from watching Annie Lennox. Her song actually has a lot of strange structure to it and an outfit that fits that kind of powerful condition that the song conveys. I don’t think I’ve ever worn a suit in my life, and you can’t go wrong with Versace. The video featured a juxtaposition with kids showing innocence and violence at the same time and how you transform over the years as you get older. There are a lot of elements to it.

I have a feeling that a lot of people are going to try to read a lot into it, with the kids with the masks, you and the crown, and your sort of snaky persona. There’s a lot of strong references going on there that definitely could warrant all kinds of interesting storylines.

I rarely read comments so when I do and read someone who’s written a whole exposé on what everything means I’m like, that’s awesome! I love reading people’s interpretations of it, it’s so fun.

Yeah, it’s great to throw it out into the world to be taken in as they will.

Yeah, and make something that’s just fun to watch and goes with the song in the best way possible. I have a lot of different sides to my personality so reflecting that in a video is important. I’m not just one-dimensional. With “25” I was sort of doing the same thing – showing different versions of myself. A woman at a bar telling her story to a ghostly bartender and a woman on a jazz stage singing to this kinda absent and ghostly audience. The rooftop scene is essentially a woman on a rooftop waiting for her lover. In “25,” I really wanted to make New York City the love of the video because I’ve had a love affair with New York since I was a baby. It felt like that was the right thing instead of making it a person.

Are you currently in New York?

No, I’m back in Maine which is good, but it’s fucking cold in February. I miss New York desperately. Even during COVID – just being there a week and a half, even though we were working nonstop – just to feel a little bit of the energy again was like a breath of fresh air. I haven’t left Maine – we made the record here and so I’ve been in Maine for quite a while. I’m a New York girl. That’s where I primarily live but I feel like it made sense to stay in Maine during all of this madness.

Do you have a studio in your house?

I don’t have a studio but I do have a little recording setup that I’ve had to figure out. That was my biggest challenge of COVID was figuring out how to record myself from home because I don’t do that, I’m not an engineer. I write songs, I play the songs, I sing the songs. I am not a recording engineer by any means. I’m very technologically challenged. It was probably the first time I’ve opened a computer in 8 years while figuring out how to do a zoom meeting. Trying to record on the computer, I gave up on that really quickly. It just didn’t feel organic. I didn’t like it so I went back to how I used to record myself when I was young with my battery-packed analog four-track. That’s how I’ve been making all of the songs and recordings that we’ve done during the pandemic – which is probably not the easiest way, but it works for me.

Is the whole band recording at the house in Maine or are you guys separated and coming together to work on stuff, how do you have it set up?

No, we’re all separated. But we are all relatively close. The whole reason I got a house in Maine in the first place was because of the band. Ben and I live in New York but Mark and Jamie live in New England and our rehearsal stage is up here. We were supposed to be going on tour back in the beginning of 2020. After the record cover photoshoot which was back in March, I was coming back up here to rehearse. We were starting rehearsals and the pandemic hit and the lockdown hit. I just got stuck up here and decided to stay. I love Maine. Maine and New York are kind of the perfect juxtaposition of each other because one has such energy and one has such isolation – it’s great for when you just need to get inside your own head. I’m a huge Stephen King fan and it made a lot of sense for him that he had a place where he wrote all his masterpieces. And I have always loved England and have wanted to move to England, so New England is a good first step.

So you came to New York for a week or so and shot all of your videos back to back. How was that experience? Was it incredibly overwhelming to deal with that level of interaction with people and intensity? It must have been one extreme to the other to be in Maine and then to come to New York to work on all those productions.

It was like jumping into the deep end again. It was really fun though. Even though we weren’t playing a show and we were making videos – you know those drums are still real, Jamie’s still hitting the drums. The amp is still plugged in. It was almost a celebration in one way because it was the first time I’d seen the guys in over a year. That alone was just super fun. I’m such a hypochondriac, so the weeks leading up to it I was freaking out a bit about having to be around all those people. We took every safety protocol possible. We had COVID officers on set, with every test possible – 48-hour tests, 24-hour tests, 12-hour tests, and 15 minute testing on set. You were cleared before you were allowed in the building every day. It was a lot of prep work to make sure everyone was as safe as possible. Once I cleared that out of my mind, I just went into work mode. I almost got tunnel vision where I can’t see anything but what’s in front of me which is creating something amazing or at least attempting to. The fear of [Covid] kinda drifted away. My mindset went to art immediately. Once I’m in that mindset it’s hard to get me out of it. It was hard to come back to Maine afterward, I was on such an adrenaline rush. It took me two weeks to be able to calm down. To come back to complete isolation – like I was in the middle of nowhere on an island off the coast of Maine – it’s that remote. So to come back to that after all that excitement was a little like, I don’t know what to do with myself now!

Are you planning any interesting activations with the new album due to the pandemic with tours on hold? I’m assuming you can’t tour at the moment?

We can not. We keep booking tours and they keep getting postponed. So we’re kind of in the same boat as every other band right now, it’s just a waiting game. I just don’t know when it’s actually going to come back, I’m hopeful that it will be sooner than later, but who knows. I miss it desperately, so fingers crossed. it’s very strange times we’re living in and you got to ride out the storm.

Are you doing any virtual programming aside from the music videos and track releases?

It’s certainly something we’ve been talking about and depending on how the world continues to go it’s something that we’re considering at this point. But it’s not the same as singing in the room with a live show. It’s one night where your relationship with your instrument, the band, being on stage, that symbiotic relationship you get with the fans is unlike anything else. It’s like a drug, it’s like a high you can’t get anywhere else. During the lockdown, just to keep my creative juices flowing, I’ve been doing quite a few acoustic things on our own songs. I’ve done a piano version of “House On a Hill,” which is something I’ve been wanting to do for many years but had never gotten around to it. So in one way, it’s kind of a blessing in disguise where I’ve gotten to do collaborations and covers of songs which is not something I generally gravitate towards doing. I covered the “Keeper” with Alain Johannes and “Half Way There” with Matt Cameron. Most recently I was just a part of the David Bowie tribute concert. Things like that have been keeping me going. As much as I love acoustic guitar I’m desperately missing electricity! I’m looking forward to the day where I can just get back in a rehearsal space with the four of us. Let’s just start there where we can actually plugin and turn it up, because there is nothing else like it. The deprivation of that is starting to wear on me – like it is for everyone. I’m not the first person to say this. I think everyone is missing it. So fingers crossed for the future!

I’m really excited for people to hear this album. We have worked so incredibly hard on it and I’m so, so proud of it. I’m really excited for it to be out in the world and for everyone to be able to listen to it.

#Taylor Momsen #the pretty reckless #2021 interviews

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everybodylovesrand · 4 years

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Raje Judkins answered some questions about the show. Filming spoilers for the show below:

Q: What part of the books should you be caught up on for the first season?

A: Depends on if you like to read something before you watch it or not.

Q: What are you finding most challenging about going from book to screen? A: The hardest thing is the physicality of production. In the first book alone they go to more than 20 villages and cities. To try to do that is physically impossible for the show, so most of the work we don in the room is geographical, figuring how to condense the story and move it through places we can physically create.

Q: Do you have a favorite chapter from the whole saga? Mine is Veins of Gold. A: So many. But Honey in the Tea is the one off the top of my head.

Q: We can’t wait to see Elayne, Aviendha and Min

A: Me either. Three of my favorites.

Q: Has any post-production work begun or does that not start until filming is completed?

A: Nope! We do it simultaneously. Before the corona hit, I was prepping 2 episodes, shooting 2 episodes, in post on 4 episodes and writing Season 2 simultaneously :-0

Q: Will there be a soundtrack? Who’s the composer? A: Of course! David Buckley. Plus a few incredible musical guests we’ve already had.

Q: Are Min/Elayne in season 1? A: The Wheel weaves as the wheel wills

Q: Are you going to merge Min and Elayne? A: Hell no

Q: First moment you were speechless on set? A: First time walking into Emond’s Field with my mom

Q: Is mat fluent in the old tongue yet? A: We’ve had a couple cast members speak in it already and they NAILED IT

Q: Which character has your favorite costume so far? A: Ooo this is tough. Probably Geofram Bornhald.

Q: How is the cast and crew weathering the pandemic? A: Our team in Prague did an amazing job of getting everyone out and keeping them safe. And now everyone’s home and we all live on Instagram.

Q: Who is your favorite Forsaken? A: Ahhh. I love the ladies. Graendal, Lanfear, Moghedien. And Ishamael holds a special place in my heart the more time I spend with him

Q: What’s been your favourite shooting location so far? A: Slovenia! Spectacular stuff there

Q: Yes or no. Have you had to make any cuts be it a scene or character, that has been painful for you? A: Yes.

Q: How are you planning to handle the visualization of the weaves? Any little tidbits? A: We are trying to stay as true to the books as possible. I’ve been giving a bunch of VFX folks long diatribes about channeling, weaves, threads, earth vs. air, etc and they early stuff has started coming in. It looks FUCKING AWESOME. I screamed when Rosamund started channeling

Q: Similar to Them performing in an old Inn, what other iconic moment filmed stands out to u? A: Rand and Tam walking through the Westwood

Q: Blink twice if Min is in season 1. A: 😉😉

Q: Will Jeff Probst be one of the Aiel? Can you make some calls? A: If he dyes his hair red 😉

Q: Which WOT book title best describes your self isolation experience? A: A Memory of Light…

Q: Can we expect a trailer for the show anytime soon? A: Probably not for a long while sadly.

Q: Can you guys do a big WoT Wed announcement during the hiatus to keep all us fans hyped instead of al A: Yea! It would cheer us all up and we have some fun news

Q: Is Lan going to be as much or an absolute stud in the show as he is in the books? A: You’ve seen @danielhenney right?

Q: If you were an Aes Sedai, what Ajah would you choose? A: Such a good question. They all have merits but GREEN for the win. If only to hang with @priyankabose20

Q: Will we have to wait till season 2 to see any Aiel? (Other than Rand)

A: Nope. And the one you see will shock you. Hah. Amazon shouldn’t let me be on here when I’ve been cooped up for a week.

Q: RJ writes a lot of internal headspace stuff. What’s 1 hint on how the show will handle that? A: That’s the biggest difficulty of any novel adaptation. Figuring out how to make the internal monologue come out clearly to the audience. A lot of the changes we make and stories we tell differently are designed to serve exactly that purpose – showing you what those characters internal monologues from the book are without them just saying it out loud in exposition

Q: Are you using taller actors to portray the Aiel, or camera trickery? A: Trying to get tall folks. But I’m less concerned with height and more concerned with acting ability.

Q: Since JordanCon was cancelled, can we maybe get an extra treat next month? A: Sure! What do you want?

Q: Do you have a favorite Wise One? A: Avi

Q: How many trollocs do I have to take out to become a writing assistant? A: Violence is never the answer

Q: What would you say the CGI to practical ratio is going to be? A: Tring to do as much in camera as we possibly can!

Q: How are you handling sword forms and their names? A: We have a for real sword master on the show who walks into every room and tests out everything as a weapon. He could most definitely kill me with any item in my office.

Q: How are the horses on set? Is Mandarb spectacular? A: They are so great. Honestly I love our horses. Mandarb and Aldieb are downright sexy

Q: When will we get more casting announcements to hold us over? A: I’ll try to get them to put out something soon. A lot of folks in all departments are affected by the state of the world right now though, so I can’t promise a timeline

Q: will we see the prologue from the Eye of the World on screen in season 1 A: You will hear that phrase

Q: What has been your favorite set so far? A: Fal Dara!

Q: Please tell me you’ve cut Narg!! A: Never!!

Q To what extent has Harriet McDougal been involved with the project? A: She’s a consulting producer so she’s been out to Prague to the sets and reads all the scripts and sends me her notes on them. She and Maria are hugely helpful for maintaining the truth of the series and always keep me honest when it comes to things that change too much

Q: Is any aspect of the show still in development, or has it all stalled because of the virus? A: A lot can be done virtually! I’m still doing VFX, editing and the Season Two Virtual Writers Room! And I can do it all in pajamas

Q: Will min, elayne, and avienda have to be combined into a single character?

A: Girl you crazy. I’m not going to combine huge characters like that. Maybe sometimes a minor character folded into a more major one to make better use of our cast but nothing nutso

Q: RJ created 1000’s of character. Given that did you feel the need to create new characters? A: Anyone “new” is inspired by characters in the books or a number of characters combined. If we paid to cast all speaking roles in the book we could only afford to have a radio play

Q: So far, what is your favorite prop in the show? A: Great Serpent Ring. We all want one.

Q: Will Loial portray the Ogier species, or will he be humanised for screen? A: He’s an Ogier!

Q: How involved, if involved at all, is Sanderson in the writers room? A: Brandon is hugely helpful. I talked to him before we started Season Two while he was in Prague to get advice and he reads all the scripts and gives notes. He’s incredibly thoughtful and understands the process of adaptation and what’s required from it. I feel so lucky to have him involved. I would have him do more if I could make him!

Q: What words of hope would you offer a fan afraid that the show will cut out a lot of content? A: I genuinely think we are cutting less than most people think. When I see people ask questions like “are you cutting Min?” It blows my mind. I don’t know how you do an adaptation without some of these characters. I think it’ll be more of the smaller stories you’ll miss. We can’t have Rand and May (sic) travel to many many inns on their travels across the countryside for instance. It’s just not producible. So that will be more of what you miss I think, and the books always exist to read for that 🙂

Q: I think Bella is such an important character, will the same horse play bella through the series A: We’ve already had to have two Belas. It turns out a horse for riding on film is not the same as a horse for pulling a cart and SHE MUST DO BOTH

Q: Can you please make sure you do a great job? Book are so great A: This is are a really good idea

Q: Now you’ve met them, settle the score: who’s better with women? Rand, Mat or Perrin? A: I think they’d all say it’s the other

Q: Will the show be understandable for those who didn’t read the books? A: That’s the idea. If there are little things they don’t get though, luckily google exists

Q: Who is your favorite Aes Sedai in the books? And you can’t say Moiraine/Siuan or the Wonder Girls A: So many rules. I honestly love all of them though (except Galina that bitch) Alanna Liandrin and Verin are probably my Top 3. And Siuan! There’s too many I love. Sheriam! Pevara!

https://www.wotseries.com/2020/03/22/show-runner-rafe-judkins-does-an-ama-on-instagram/

#Wheel of Time #The wheel of Time #Rafe Judkins #answers questions #WOTonPrime

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thotthumb · 4 years

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Rappa (BNHA) NSFT ABC’s

Because this guy doesn’t have enough content and we THIRSTY.

So obvious warning for some smut but you already knew that 💅🏻

A = Aftercare (What they’re like after sex)

Aftercare? What’s that?

Okay well he’s not THAT bad but that’s after you somehow manage to teach this boy some manners. Not the best but he tries (some times at least).

B = Body part (Their favourite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

You’d think his arms right? Okay well you’re not completely wrong but his shoulders more specifically. Why? Well because his cute lil’ S/O can’t help but to leave scratches on him and his shoulders he can show them off easier.

On his S/O? Their thighs. Yep you heard me, Rappa is a thigh man. Muscle thighs? Amazing. Soft thighs? Perfect pillow. It’s not just because he can lay on their lap tho if he really wanted to. There’s also the fact that he can fuck their thighs and throw in some dry humping when he can’t do that.

C = Cum (Anything to do with cum basically… I’m a disgusting person)

Okay so Rappa’s a big dude, so there’s gonna be a LOT. That stuff is shooting out at you before the last bit is kinda dripping down.

It’s pretty thick and doesn’t taste the best. Tell this guy to get a better diet because his cum tastes like you dipped your tongue in some SALT.

Speaking of taste, this lil’ big shit is probably make you swallow. Yep so how you know how to down some liquid or you might struggle. Not that he minds seeing some dripping down your chin...

D = Dirty Secret (Pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

He won’t admit it but he like the idea of having whoever he’s with use their quirk on him (like not shigaraki kinda quirk but yeah). He’ll definitely say something though if he’s not feeling it.

E = Experience (How experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?)

His body count isn’t that high really, like maybe 2 or 3. But those were probably one night stands. The thing is though? He has a good idea of what he’s doing. Sure, it’s probably from a lot of ahem, films, but he knows a thing or two.

F = Favourite Position (This goes without saying. Will probably include a visual)

Literally any position that puts him in power is a go. Anything that has his partner on his knees is high on his list.

G = Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc)

Kinda both? Like he’s gonna tease and laugh but he’s not going to be telling jokes or anything like that. He’s tryna get some so he’s got a goal here.

H = Hair (How well groomed are they, does the carpet match the drapes, etc.)

He kinda keeps everything trimmed? Sometimes he straight up forgets to trim it down a little bit

Curly hair and wild as hell. Like that’s a forest floor not just a bush.

I = Intimacy (How are they during the moment, romantic aspect…)

The only Rappa has for Romance is the “R”. Like he just isn’t that great at showing it. So he uses sex as a way to show it, even if it’s not the conventional way.

J = Jack Off (Masturbation headcanon)

Keep your hand out of your damn pants, jeez. A solid FIVE days out of the week and more than likely more than once a day if he can. But he’d rather it be his S/O instead of his hand.

He’s chasing that release like his life depends on it. Fast movements, probably leaning against a wall or splayed out on a bed. Kind of rough with himself in all honesty.

K = Kink (One or more of their kinks)

Size Kink. Yeah it’s expected but there’s just something about him knowing that if he really wanted to, he could totally break his S/O. They’re just so damn tiny.

Breeding Kink. Yeahhhhhh, boy is feral. Like he doesn’t want the kid but it’s just so animalistic that he loves it. Also the mess. The mess afterwards is a huge positive.

Overstimulation. Mostly on his S/O. Just watching them squirm around, pushing at his hand and full on whimpering sets him OFF. He’ll want to go another round because of that. On him? He won’t complain but it isn’t his favorite. He’ll growl and let out grunts, jerking his hips, his thighs twitching and gripping at whatever he can.

L = Location (Favourite places to do the do)

Anywhere or at least, just about anywhere. He doesn’t like to share so as much as he loves the thrill of possibly being caught, he doesn’t want to get caught. He’s the only one who gets to see his little S/O red faced, trembling, and begging for more.

M = Motivation (What turns them on, gets them going)

Strength and being able to take a hit. He got so hyped over Fatgum not just flying off somewhere and being down for the count so combine that kind of energy with his partner being his. Like you manage to pin him somewhere? Oh shit, his pants are tight. He sees you fighting and you don’t back down? He’ll be up for some “extra training” with you.

N = NO (Something they wouldn’t do, turn-offs)

Sharing. Nope, your his. Nobody else gets to see you like that. Nobody gets to see how desperate you get bent over a counter. Nobody gets to see how you’re scratching at his back as he pounds into you.

O = Oral (Preference for giving or receiving, skill, etc)

Prefers to receive. Hope you’ve got some stamina and a mouth bordering on a snake. Also don’t be surprised if he grabs the back of your head and starts fucking your face.

He can give though but he’s not up for it. You’re a lady want him to eat you out? He’ll go down on you and he’ll hold you still so he can get his fill. You’re a dude and you want him to suck you off? Hell yeah. Because he’s massive, he could probably take you all the way into his mouth and get some licking in there too. Oh and fair warning, nasty man eats cake.

P = Pace (Are they fats and rough? Slow and sensual? etc.)

Man out here acting like Sonic okay bad joke I know but shush. He doesn’t really do slow. He’s going hard and fast. Boy is more of a break your back kinda guy really.

Q = Quickie (Their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc.)

Not apposed to it but they don’t happen too often. He likes to go for a while and you can’t really do that in 15 minutes in some nasty gas station bathroom.

R = Risk (Are they game to experiment, do they take risks, etc.)

Hella. He’s down for a risk. I mean, he’s a villain here. It’s kinda his thing. As long as he doesn’t get caught he’s fine.

S = Stamina (How many rounds can they go for, how long do they last…)

Man’s a HORSE. He can for maybe 3 to 4 rounds and lasts for maybe 30 minutes each. He just can’t get enough of his partner.

T = Toy (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?)

Not really. He doesn’t have much of need for them personally and he feels that he’s more than capable of pleasing his partner without some silicone assistance.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

He’s a tease. Being, during and after. Before doesnt last that long because he’s impatient and just wants to get going. Oh and dirty talk? There’s a lot. Like, Overho would die with how dirty.

V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make)

He’s kinda loud but not like screaming loud. Most grunts, groans and growls. He prefers making any noises in his partners ear so they hear just how good they are.

W = Wild Card (Get a random headcanon for the character of your choice)

Has definitely thought about getting maybe a ladder or and Prince Albert piercing but never went through with it.

X = X-Ray (Let’s see what’s going on in those pants, picture or words)

He’s a big guy so he’s packing but it’s in proportion. But it’s big for most people. Probably around 8 or 9 inches so not super long but it’s built like a Pepsi can. You might need two hands to go all the way around. Curves up and has a big vein on the right side. Lick that.

It’s honestly really pretty? Like it it matches his body in skin tone and gets flushed around the head. It turns are really pretty shade of pink.

Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?)

To infinity and beyond! Plus Ultra if you will. Basically, through the roof. But if you won’t let him tap, well. Poor boy gets snappy and the second you do let him (consent is important and he understands that), please cancel all plans for the next few days. You’ll be walking funny assuming you can walk.

Z = ZZZ (… how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

Borderline immediately. After he learns how aftercare works and how it’s kinda important, he’ll keep himself awake long enough to make sure nobody’s hurt (like injury hurt) and in a good headspace. Of course, you do have to tell him most of the time but he tries.

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mystic-kitten-writer · 4 years

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You’re so sweet for being so reassuring and not minding at all how I ramble about astrology 🧡 I’m very flattered with how you said how observant I am, thank you for that! But oh my gosh, please, there’s nothing to be jealous about. I personally feel like I get bogged down by details that at times I get too caught up and the bigger picture gets overlooked. (1/9)

And Zuko really is the poster child of a Mars man, you summed it up perfectly!! I am far from being an expert, but I love the validation you shower me with 🥰 Though I actually would love to reach a level where I can offer chart readings to anyone interested and have it be some kind of little side job one day. But ahh, there’s still so much I have to learn, from traditional to modern, it’s a discipline really worth getting into. (2/9)

I’ve never really thought about Azula’s nor Mai’s sign. Now I really want to think + look into it! It would be fun to analyze how that affected their dynamic with Zuko. I’ve been meaning to do a rewatch of the entire series due to quarantine, but even with staying home, there’s still school. And I find myself more stressed and not in the proper headspace to do a whole rewatch + be able to appreciate it properly. Idk if that made any sense, but hopefully I get over it soon. (3/9)

I’m hypothesizing that Azula has strong Leo/Scorpio to her, though she shows the negative qualities. She’s very loud, loud as in she makes people take notice of her + seeks praise/basks in any praise given to her, feeling entitled to all of it. Though I have to give it to her, she has this compelling vibe to her, so her entitlement is valid. She’s also cunning + manipulative and is a master at being so. Though none of that is her fault, she just really didn’t know any better. (4/9)

I would associate Mai’s no bull-shit attitude with Capricorn/Aquarius. I actually haven’t read the comics but her no bull-shit persona shines in the series and it’s fantastic! She’s not upfront with her feelings, but blunt with everything else. At the same time, she didn’t have a problem with stepping up when needed, such as stepping up to Azula. All of which fit into the archetypes of Cap/Aqua. And I agree communication between her and Zuko would be crucial for understanding between them. (5/9)

Those are my best guesses, I’ll get back to you more on how their signs played into their interactions with Zuko when I get to rewatching the series later! Yue’s gentleness comes from her Venus energy, and it’s wonderful how it allows Zuko’s inner Cancer to be visible. I also just realized Yue’s Libra energy and Zuko’s Aries energy play a part as to why they’re so appealing to each other too. They are opposites that just absolutely complement each other! (6/9)

Oh, I’m a Taurus + Libra moon + Sagittarius ascendant! Thanks for being curious ☺️ Going back to how you said you’re a Scorpio and your sister is a Taurus, I can relate. My mom is a Scorpio, and similarly, it took growing up for me to understand where my mom is coming from because we used to disagree on a bunch of things. I don’t have a proper explanation for it tbh. Other than the fact that Taurus and Scorpio are naturally opposites, so misunderstandings can easily arise. (7/9)

Though funny enough, I have a lot of people in my life that have Scorpio in their chart, and I’ve read a few times that if signs that naturally oppose each other make the effort to connect, then the connection is extraordinary. And as a Taurus, the people who positively affected me most are people with Scorpio energy, so I guess it’s the universe’s way of bringing balance. (8/9)

Omg, all of my asks basically make up a whole essay on astrology, and I really can’t believe I typed all that out. But thank you for sharing my enthusiasm for it 💓 I promise I can talk about things other than astrology though, aha. The next time I send you a message it’ll be on a different topic for sure! Also, I have no idea if any parts duplicated/are missing because Tumblr made me wait an hour before I could send everything. So I hope everything shows up properly! (9/9) - 🌻

I don’t know if it’s just me – but it makes my DAY getting long asks.

I love reading people’s words because you can tell how much effort and joy the person has while writing something (whatever the topic is). Like high-key, I wait for your asks because they’re always so long and in-depth, and as someone who suffers from word vomit – I can appreciate the passion and overall love. So, you better not send me short asks – I will hold it against you 😂 LOOL I need an essay buddy~! 😉

I AM CLAIMING DIBS ON BEING YOUR FIRST CUSTOMER. You can read my whole soul damnit because while I totally agree with you that Astrology is a broad discipline with much material to learn and cover, you have a vast knowledge on the topic already. I can totally see you doing it! You explain things very well, and as I read, I find myself learning stuff, and as someone who loves learning – your attention to detail and how clear you are is much appreciated.

Trust me, I get that feeling of stress. Like even though I finished school, and I can relax for the summer because my summer classes got cancelled, being stuck at home is starting to get to me. I’m very much an ambivert (leaning towards introverted), and usually, being alone is my fav zone. Still, I do enjoy going for walks and staying active (even if it's solo activities #Idontdoteamworkandusuallyendedupplayingsoloevents). But the weather has been poor, and I think all my family and friends are starting to get cabin fever 😅. Are you done your classes for the semester yet, or do you still have time to go?

OUUU, I see that mix of Leo Scorpio. Gosh, you're so good at this stuff. I can ask you questions all day LOOL. Like that manipulative aspect is, no doubt in my mind, a Scorpio thing 🙈. Like I’m a Scorpio, and even I can admit it – we’re master manipulators (for better or worse). But I’m surprised by the Mai one! Not because I don’t agree, but because I couldn’t pin one down for her, but I think you nailed it. I’m excited to see if you change your opinions once you watch the show. Because something I notice that happens naturally as you age, is certain traits of the zodiac signs become more prominent or disappear. Because, unsurprisingly, first episode Zuko to comic books Zuko are pretty much two completely different characters. He went from ‘don’t touch me’ to starting every single hug in the comic books with Aang and Sokka, etc. (Soft Zuko does things to me 🤭).

SO, QUESTION – how does Yue’s Venus influence Zuko’s cancer, and how does Yue’s Libra’s energy influence Zuko’s Aries? Like I know, they influence each other, but I’m trying to find the right words, or examples, of it happening. Or ways to describe how they affect each other. I’m sorry if I’m not making any sense. I just – there’s so much to learn, and I want to know more and more 🤯

HANDS DOWN, I would not label you as a Taurus!

I was going to label you as a Libra (so I’m happy I got that one right, kind of), but I’m so shooketh about the Taurus. But I can’t agree with you more on the fact that while Taurus/Scorpio’s are opposites, if they put effort into the relationship, it's incredible. Because I think a lot of it stems from miscommunication. Like I believe communication is vital in any given relationship, obliviously, but certain signs need an extra sprinkle of it to work.

My sister just had a second baby, and her first baby is a Libra/Scorpio cusp, and the second girl is Scorpio, and her husband is also a Libra/Scorpio cusp. I had to laugh and say good luck raising two mini-mes! She’s like I shot myself in the foot LOOL 😂😂😂

And don’t worry about it, hunny! If I ever miss a part, I’ll send a post right away in search of your missing ones because I need your words 😉

#ask me anything #anon answered #zuko #atla #astrology #🌻#🌻 anon #sunflower anon

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lovemesomesurveys · 4 years

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Have you ever read the Hunger Games series? Yep and watched all the movies. I was really into it at the time. When was the last time you ran into something? Hmm. I don’t recall. Do you enjoy dressing up? Nah. Do you live in the city or a rural area? I live in the city. Would you say you have a sense of style? My sense of style consists of mostly graphic tees and leggings, but also some Adidas clothes. And shoes.

What’s your biggest fear? This question comes up all the damn time. Have you ever been bitten by a wild animal? Nooo. Are you close to any of your cousins? Aww, I used to be close to a few of my cousins. Not anymore, though. :( That’s all my fault. I became really distant and withdrawn from friends and even family outside of my immediate family. Have you ever been lost in the woods? No, thankfully. Where did you last travel? Disneyland back in February. Do you enjoy driving? I don’t drive. What song did you last listen to? I mentioned this in a previous survey already, but I’ve had Savage by Megan the Stallion stuck in my head because of TikTok. If you have a job, how often do you work? I don’t have a job. What time do you normally go to sleep at night? For the past month I’ve been going to bed after 6AM. :X Do you watch a lot of movies? Hmm. Not a lot, no. I watch more TV shows. Do you like Tom Petty? ”Now I’m freeeeeee Free fallin’.” Would you rather have snow or rain? I love rainy days. It doesn’t snow here, but I wish it did. Do you own a lot of sweaters? I own a lot of sweatshirts. Have you ever tried rock-climbing? Well, no. For obvious reasons. Ever ridden in a police car? Nope. Favorite decade of music? That’s tough cause I like music that spans across decades, but I think the 90s and early 2000′s will hold a special spot. Have any of your best friends been your best friend longer than a year? My longest was my best friend of 15 years. Ever witnessed a murder? Noooo. Does your room have a ceiling fan? Yep. Have you ever tried blogging? Before Tumblr I had Xanga for a long time. Favorite television channel? E!, MTV, The Hallmark Channel, TeenNick, TVLand, and the ID Channel. Have you ever lied under oath? I’ve never had to be under oath. What are your religious views? I’m a Christian. When did you last change your bed sheets? A week ago. Would you consider yourself a flirt? No. At what age do you plan to be married? I don’t plan on getting married. Do you eat a lot of junk food? Honestly, all I eat is sandwiches, ramen, eggs, and Wingstop. Sometimes pizza and pasta. When did you last go on vacation? I’ve answered this 3 times now tonight, but I went to Disneyland back in February. Are you resilient? I was when I was younger. Definitely not anymore. Have you ever failed a subject before? I failed one math course in community college and had to retake it again. I ended up doing a lot better the 2nd time. I honestly believe it’s because I had a better teacher. If so, what was the class? ^^^ Do you wear more bright or dull colors? Dull. Majority of my clothes are black. Do you know anyone who has attempted suicide? Yes. What’s your favorite quote? Blah. How many clocks are in your house? Like 20 including all the electronics. Do you play any sports? Nope. What is your biggest life regret? I have a lot of those. Have you ever been injured in a car accident? No, thankfully. If you could be anywhere in the world right now, where would you be? Well obviously right now I only want to be at home, but I look forward to the day I can go to the beach. Have you ever had highlights in your hair? Yeah, I had them for years. Favorite fast food restaurant? I’m not into fast food anymore like I used to be. I was a fast food junkie before. The only takeout I’m into is Wingstop. And pizza from a local place, but I haven’t had that in awhile. In what country were you born? US of A. Are your eyes more than one color? Nope, just brown. Have you ever caught something on fire? Something in the microwave once, something in the oven once, the tips of my hair.... What would you consider your biggest flaw? Oh boy where to start. What do you think your best quality is? I don’t know. Do you enjoy listening to others’ problems? I used to be the person people came to if they needed advice or just someone to talk to and I was good at it. I liked being there and helping any way I could. People told me they felt comfortable talking to me and I was easy to talk to. It could also be overwhelming and draining at times. Especially leading up to when I fell into a really low, dark place a few years ago. I couldn’t be that person anymore. I wasn’t in a good headspace. I pushed everyone away and became very distant and withdrawn. That was 4 years ago and I’m still out of that place. :/

Do you keep any plants in your house? Nope. What is your mother’s occupation? She’s a manager at Walgreens. Do any of your friends like your musical style? My family and I share some musical interests. What are you most looking forward to? I wanna say this quarantine ending, but I know resuming life in the real world would also be making me anxious when the time comes. I guess I’m most excited for seeing Gabie again, because I haven’t seen March 7th. <<< SAME to the first part. What was your favorite television show as a child? Disney Channel, Nickelodeon, PBS, Saturday morning cartoons on ABC, WB Kids... all the kid shows in the 90s, basically. Are you afraid of insects? YES. ALL of them. Are you cold-natured? I’m very warm blooded, I feel like I’m always hot. I like when I’m actually cold and can wear a hoodie/sweatshirt or curl up under a blanket. How old were you when you got your first pet? We had a dog when I was a baby. Did you / do you enjoy high school? I liked parts of it. What would you say was your favorite age? Childhood. What annoys you most about social networking? Trolls, fake news, cancel culture.

Are you the center of attention most of the time? Nooo. I never want to be the center of attention. What are you currently reading? I’m starting the 2nd book in the Jack Ryder Mystery Series by Willow Rose. When did you last go to the library? Sometime back in 2014 when I was still in school. Are you ill at the moment? Not with a virus or anything like that, thankfully. I just always feel crappy for other reasons. Do people tease you about anything? How I’m too sensitive. How late did you stay up last night and why? Last night I went to bed at 4 in the morning, which is really early for me these days. Have you ever written poetry? I dabbled with it when I was 16. I still have the diary I wrote them in and yikes they’re so cringe-y haha. Curtains or shades? Curtains. How many people have you spoken to in the last hour? Zero, everyone in my house is asleep. Do you tend to text a lot? Nope. Ever lost a great best friend? Yes. What is your favorite kind of flower? Eh, I just say roses but I don’t really have one. Do you own any guns? No. What would you say is your favorite book of all-time? I could never choose. What’s your least favorite part of the day? Late evening always seems to go by really slow.

Have you ever won an award for a speech? No. Do you tend to curse a lot? Nah. Have you ever played on the Ouija board? Nooo. I don’t mess with that kind of stuff. Do you sleepwalk? Nope. Have you ever slept on the floor before? Yeah. Are you a fan of public displays of affection? I don’t care for like heavy make out sessions or groping all over each other, but I don’t care about a kiss, cuddling, or hand holding. When did you last attend a yard sale? When I was a kid. We had a family friend who had them often. What goals do you wish to accomplish tomorrow? I don’t have anything I want to accomplish tomorrow. When is your birthday? July 28th. What was the best part of today? It’s only 430 in the morning. Do you attempt to stay away from drama? Involving me yes, but I like celebrity gossip and drama. What liquid did you last drink? Starbucks Doubleshot energy drink. Do you ever prefer to be alone? Yeah, I need to have some alone time. Have you ever had a deadly animal as a pet? No. Favorite Disney movie? Alice in Wonderland, Winnie the Pooh, A Goofy Movie, and Toy Story. Have you ever been to the beach? Countless times. I love the beach. If you have, how many times have you been? ^^^^ What was your dream occupation at age ten? I wanted to be a teacher back then. Are you terrified at the idea of weight-gain? No. I’m underweight and need to gain some weight. Do you drink a lot of water? I only get like 2-3 glasses a day. :X Does your room have carpet or hard-wood floors? Carpet. Do you take naps daily? No.

Who were you named after? No one in particular. Do you plan on traveling this spring or summer? No, we’re still going to be dealing with all this. :/ Do you know anyone who is colorblind? Nope. Have you ever been a teacher’s pet? I guess so. I was always the good kid, the “pleasure to have in class.” Teachers loved me. What is your absolute favorite hobby? Reading, surveys, coloring. Ever been to a tanning bed before? No. I have no interest in that. Are you satisfied with your financial stability? I have enough to pay my bills and a little extra for other stuff, so I’m grateful for that. Who is your favorite actor / actress? Alexander Skarsgard. Are your nails painted? Nope. Do you ever accidentally talk to inanimate objects? Not accidentally, but I talk to inanimate objects when they don’t cooperate. More like talk shit, but haha. What’s your favorite flavor of ice cream? Strawberry. Have you ever kissed someone of the same gender? No. Do you receive any hate mail? No. Have you ever sent a letter in the mail? Yeah. If you could, would you have a pen pal? I did in 3rd grade. It was fun. We even got to meet them toward the end of the year during a field trip. I wouldn’t want one now, though. What color are the pants you’re wearing? I’m wearing black leggings. What is your life philosophy? Hmm. Who last sent you a goodnight text message? No one does. Do you own any clothes that are your favorite color? Yeah. One of my favorite colors is black and most of my clothes are black. I have a few items that are my other favorite colors as well. Have you ever been in a hot tub before? Once for a short time. I didn’t like it. What’s your favorite comedy movie? I have several, but the one that came to mind first was Bridesmaids. In which year were you born? 1989.

#personal #text #survey #surveys

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