#still trying to understand the context of the first photo
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he is officially the happiest man in the world
#him and his little boys <3#still trying to understand the context of the first photo#their happiness is being my serotonin#leo messi#messi#lionel messi#thiago messi#mateo messi
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I think in this new age of A.I. the general public is going to need to increase their photography and lighting literacy. The response to this photo has just been a shit show.
There are people pointing out perfectly normal edge lighting and misunderstanding how reflections work.
First the plane is parked at an angle. The tail is farther back than the nose. But also that is a curved surface and it tapers. It's reflecting the area to the right of the photo.
And the bottom of the plane is reflecting what is directly underneath. Which is the tarmac, not the crowd.
It should also be noted that photo was shot with a very telephoto lens and everything is super compressed. The crowd appears much closer to the airplane than they actually are.
But then someone who should have good understanding of lighting said this...
And now I'm worried for her clients. Because that's very... wrong.
Well, wrong-ish.
First, let's try to understand why this photo is setting off some alarm bells.
The crowd toward the rear is in shadow, but they are still very well exposed. But then there is also a bright light source creating a strong edge light on them. Looking at this photo with just the context of what is in it, there are some things that seem uncanny.
The information we do not have is the people in the shadow area are inside a very brightly lit airplane hangar.
So they have artificial light blasting them from the top.
But that light is still much dimmer than the sunlit areas outside so they appear in shade. But we are used to shade being much darker than areas in direct sun. So the balance seems off in our brain. We expect the people to be darker because we don't have the context of the bright hangar lights above them.
But the other issue is that the photo was post processed. It wasn't manipulated. The pixels weren't changed. But the exposure balance was altered.
If I were to guess, the original photo looked more like this...
But newer digital cameras can have 13 to 15 stops of dynamic range. And if you shoot in RAW, you can easily lift shadows and bring down highlights. You can balance the exposure so the dark parts aren't as dark and the bright parts aren't as bright. This photographer might have overdone it a bit in this case, but this is a fairly standard edit used to bring balance to photos.
And lastly, where does the edge light come from?
Edge lighting or backlighting or rim lighting (all the same) should probably be called wrap-around lighting if you want to be more accurate.
It comes from a homogenous light source that is larger than the subject being lit. So with my knife photo, I placed it on a large LED panel light.
The light source was bigger than the subject so it wrapped around the edges.
And I'm afraid the airplane is not nearly large enough to create a light source to wrap around everyone in the crowd. It isn't even reflecting direct sunlight. So I'm sorry to say that lighting designer was mostly mistaken despite the confidence.
The light source is... everything.
That entire red area I highlighted is the light source.
As well as everything above and everything to the sides.
And the biggest aspect of that light source would be the sky above. I think people always forget the sky is a light source. If you are seeing blue, you are seeing light. And I guess the plane is included in that, but that entire highlighted red area is so bright, and so filled with sunlight bouncing around, that it creates basically a giant softbox. It becomes a huge single light source for the people in the hangar.
If you look at footage taken from way inside the hangar, you can see the camera adjusting exposure for the crowd inside, but look at what happens to the sunlit area outside.
What does that look like?
A giant softbox.
A single homogenous light source blasting light inside the hangar.
The sun is so incredibly bright that even when it is not directly lighting something, the light just bouncing around outside is enough to overpower the very bright hangar lights.
So, what have we learned from this?
Perhaps people should hire me to be their lighting designer.
Though I'm sure she is actually very talented. She seems to work with stage lights and this is more physics and photography.
Phystography.
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Hello, an apology, I don't know if you are still posting with the Slashers but if you can I would really like a reaction from them.
How would the Slashers react to seeing that their partner prepared a dessert with a somewhat sadistic theme? (Context: I saw a video where there is a person who makes a cake with details of a face, and when you cut it juice comes out of the red fruit, he also makes cookies with eyes [Clearly they are not real])
An apology if I have spelling mistakes, but I don't know how to write English very well. If you can't make the publication I understand. Have a nice day.
SLASHERS WITH A BAKER S/O THAT MAKES TERRIFYING DESERTS
WARNINGS: disturbing imagery I guess, nothing else really
This is what I had in mind when righting this
MICHAEL
Michael comes home from killing and he sees you taking photos of a heart on a plate. He's so confused. Did you kill someone and take their heart out while he was gone? He's even more confused when you pick up a knife and cut into. This is when he decides to make his present known. You look up and smile, all proud, asking him if he likes the cake. He is shocked that's a cake. It looks so real, it's trippy. But yes, he likes it and is now more interested in your craft. So be warned you will probably have Michael hovering around you next time you bake.
OTIS
It's Halloween, and it's yours and Otis anniversary. So you decided to make something special for you and Otis to enjoy together. But you don't want it to be a plain and boring looking. So you rack your brain then the idea of making a cherry pie then making the top crust a face. It was perfectly macabre, so you slaved away in the kitchen making it. Then when you and Otis were alone, you presented to him and he is amazed to say the least. You thought of this? You made this? You are so creative darling; it looks almost too good to eat. So yeah, you created a monster, and he expects only beautifully macabre deserts when you bake.
PATRICK
It’s was yours and Patrick’s first Valentine’s Day as a couple. Taking this opportunity to show off Patrick you take him to Dorsia. You guys have a wonderful night before you head back to your place. You show Patrick the cake and explain how you made it. He listens intently, appreciating your work. He loves how real it looks. How you took your time to craft such a work for him. FOR HIM. He’s flattered and doesn’t turn down your offer to hand feed the cake to him before the nigh turned more macabre and the true fun started.
VINCENT
You wanted a pie but you knew Bo and Lester would want some so you decided to try a deterrent that being the creepy ass face you put in the pie. Boy did they both stay away from it claiming it was cursed. Proud of your work and new found deterrent you showed Vincent the pie. He found it quite funny that his brothers thought it was cursed. Yes it looked frightening but in a weird way it was beautiful. It was definitely a work created from your hands and mind and Vincent loved that. He loved anytime you made things like this. He also loved that he got a piece of the pie because most time it would’ve already been gone by the time he could get a slice so he appreciated your macabre deterrent a bit more than others.
#michael myers#otis driftwood#patrick bateman#vincent sinclair#slashers#michael myers x male reader#michael myers x reader#otis driftwood x male reader#otis driftwood x reader#patrick bateman x male reader#patrick bateman x reader#vincent sinclair x male reader#vincent sinclair x reader#slashers x male reader#slashers x reader
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I’m following the DPRK debates (or trying to at least) but ultimately I’m struggling to understand how to glorify a nation that impedes so heavily on its citizen’s human rights, any insight?
Two things:
First, you shouldn't be trying to glorify anything. You should be trying to understand things and separating truth from fiction.
Second, in that vein, you should be seriously questioning what is being said about the DPRK and why. The US and its allies have a vested interest in ensuring that any socialist project fails, and when they are unable to cause a real failure, they work to make the public believe that it has failed anyway.
The two main sources of the most egregious human rights violations are defector testimony and US/ROK intelligence. If you've been following what I've posted about the DPRK on this blog then you should already know the problems with defector testimony (you can watch this short documentary if you want to know more about that and hear from a few former DPRK residents who rebut many typical defector narratives,) but suffice it to say that the ROK actively pays defectors to make false and scripted statements in the South Korean media, and those who do not go along with the ROK government narrative or who actively contradict it are censored and even face prison time.
Meanwhile, Western intelligence is inherently unverifiable. The best you're going to get is a satellite photo with a building labeled "torture facility" as if we're supposed to look at a roof and be like "uh-huh, that looks like a torture facility to me". US and ROK intelligence officials can and do say whatever they like, but at the end of the day they are the direct enemies of the DPRK and their claims cannot be trusted.
The two Korean governments are still at war; they have never signed a peace treaty. Their conduct must be viewed first and foremost in this context. Both the ROK and the DPRK block movement of people across the DMZ. Both the ROK and the DPRK prevent the dissemination of information coming from each other's nations. Both the ROK and the DPRK surveil their citizens and place controls on the media. Both the ROK and the DPRK place limits on political and cultural activity. The ROK acts to suppress anti-capitalist movements and protect the capitalist way of life, and the DPRK acts to suppress anti-socialist movements and protect the socialist way of life, as both sides view their own political and economic systems as vital to the protection of human rights. On any of these grounds, you cannot fault one side without faulting the other, which is why Western media often opts instead to focus on the more exaggerated and unverifiable claims except when explicitly advocating in favor of capitalism over socialism.
Finally, there is the issue of contradictory ideas of human rights. The capitalist West will insist time and time again that the right to private property is a basic human right, while avoiding or even denying the idea of a right to food, shelter, clothing, healthcare, etc. as a basic human right. To the West, a landlord's right to evict a tenant is inviolable. To the West, denying a person shelter is more of a human right than granting them shelter. The opposite is true in socialist nations such as the DPRK. That the DPRK holds different values as human rights does not then mean that the DPRK is some terrible oppressive violator of human rights. The right to be a capitalist should not be considered a human right. The right to be a saboteur should not be considered a human right.
The DPRK Association for Human Rights Studies, a non-governmental organization in Pyongyang, published a report in 2014 on human rights from the perspective of the DPRK, outlining their objections to US-led international human rights standards and the progress being made in the DPRK towards guaranteeing human rights. You can call it propaganda if you like, but if you do not even look at the statements coming out of the DPRK, how can you have a rounded view of the situation?
Had the DPRK not succeeded in withstanding the attacks against it, had it managed to become subjugated by the US and other imperialist forces, I do not think we could then say that human rights in North Korea would have been secured and safeguarded. The poverty and inequality that the proletariat of South Korea are afflicted with today would have become the norm across the whole peninsula. Even if you believe that human rights are violated today in the DPRK, you must at least admit that the victory of the US and its puppet government in the South cannot be a means of combating any alleged human rights violations in the North.
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The call has ended, but the final recording still has a bit further to go.
BEGINNING || PREVIOUS || NEXT MASTER POST
Sorry these past several updates have been such downers. I promise the next one will have some fun banter. Can’t wait to get back to the real world with less digital effects and data dump. I don’t know how Donnie deals with all of it.
Below the cut I’ve added a little talk about Donnie and the way he handled this heavy conversation, something I fear might come off a little harsh without the proper context clues. Also, below is a fun little discovery I made about Omega!
I’ve already had a few people express how Donnie seems mean to his family in this update, which I totally understand how it can come off like that. A certain amount of nuance is lost in this sort of comic format with neither descriptors, actual voice acting, or even Donnie’s face to give context for the way he is saying certain lines. It’s an artistic choice I made, but one I still wish to clarify.
I see the sudden hang up as less Donnie being a jerk and more him having to cut the conversation short because he has to keep focus and he’s scared of Leo talking him down from the ledge he’s standing on. He’s sticking to his guns and it hurts him to see how much it’s hurting his family and so all he can do is distance himself before the strong emotions cause him to make a mistake in the middle of enemy territory (placing legitimate logical concerns over emotional ones). At the same time he is attempting to remain calm if only to try and let some of that wash onto Leo and April, because he knows if Leo freaks out too much he could risk bleeding out faster, which is why he was pressing for April to care for him first and foremost. Were he a better liar he might have done so just to keep Leo calm a little longer, but no such luck. Donnie holds so much love for his family, and I don’t think an apocalypse has changed that, he just has difficulty at times knowing the hierarchy of emotions expected of such a rare and dire situation and instead chooses to focus on the logical issues because at least those are some things he has certain control over. He wants to keep his family safe at all costs and if he has to cut off the last conversation he initiated and desperately wanted with his family to do so then he will. I hope that clears some things up. I might make this paragraph into it’s own post tomorrow for those who might have missed this update.
On another note, I discovered something fun while researching Donnie’s screen UI! (Extra photos under the cut:) Omega is actually in the movie (kind of)! Look at the lil’ guy! All sorts of dead!
Thanks as always for your support and comments, it means a ton!
#rottmnt replica#replica#rottmnt#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#future leo#Future Donnie#future april#future bootyyy shaker#kathaynesart#unpause rise of the tmnt#unpause rottmnt#save rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#violence
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Gravity Falls DVD Commentary Highlights
(just a huge, and I mean huge, dump of random quotes that stuck out to me, which I sorta separated into characters+their relationships and it's probably gonna be obvious that Stan is my fave lmao
I dunno how to make this legible for anyone but whatever, just take all these rando character tidbits. Stan Twin pranks! Sonployee essays! The concept for a post-Weirdmageddon episode that Alex insists is just too miserable but I want it anyway! The Pines family making me cry!)
Stan
"We love the idea of Stan [in Boss Mabel] having a minute to uh, having a context where we want to see him be his worst self and seeing his big brash personality in like a setting that everyone can understand, because the Mystery Shack is a little bit ungrounded because he's in his world of his characters, but seeing him out in the outside world is funny weird."
We really enjoyed the fact that he's as awful as ever and he's rewarded for it. We like those anti-morals where Stan uses his terribleness to succeed incredibly well.
I think it was a little hard for people to understand in the writer's room at the beginning of the series was that, even though Stan is following a lot of these tropes of being a miser, he's not grumpy. Like he actually loves being himself. He really revels in it like even though he's got some kind of sorrow inside, his kind of day-to-day like he's more about just the uncle who loves to hear himself and make dumb jokes than he is somebody who's mean or cruel or cynical per se.
The [NWHS] storyboards managed to make Stan this awesome action hero while still keeping him Stan. Like I like the fact that he steals a wallet in the middle of it. He steals a wallet, he smashes somebody against the wall, he sasses him but he also has this just great Inception moment. And it's because we're building to a big question about “who is Stan?”, I felt a moment of seeing him be kind of awesome further increases your “who is this guy?” He keeps going back and forth between like “oh geez my back” and you're like “all right that's the Stan I know” and then like “whoa, he just did an awesome jailbreak! Is he some kind of super villain? Who is he really?
There's more of Ford in Stan than I think Stan realizes that I think only comes out in certain moments.”
Why did Stan keep a clipping of himself titled “grifter at large”? I think he thought he looked cool in that picture. “You know I kind of have a Clint Eastwood look in this grifter at large photo. I think maybe I'll use this as an About the Author one day. I gotta hold on to this one. You know what, I'm a criminal but I'm a nostalgic criminal! Loving the past is my greatest crime now!”
I know how Stan feels in this [Principal talking to his family] scene, when somebody comes in and says like “You know what? There was a race you didn't know you were running and you're already behind, way behind.”
And you know even though Stan is a guy who looks like he's having a fun time, I always, in my gut, thought of him as somebody who is a huge well of sadness, a loss of human connection. And that need to please, that trying to get laughs from the crowd and constantly telling dumb jokes and you know putting on a big show in the Mystery Shack, he's trying to get from them the affection that he never got from his family and lost with his brother.
Stan has been waiting for years to have a reunion with his brother. He's always felt like a screw-up. Stan once again had an idea of how he thought things were going to go. He thought that his brother was saying “I need your help” for the first time. He's going to go up there, they're gonna have some drinks, they're gonna catch up and instead he ended up shoving his brother into another dimension and running out of food and money. It's sort of his worst nightmare. But this was Stan's entire character, from the very beginning of the series, was built around this idea that he's living with this tragedy. He's a guy who outwardly seems like he doesn't appreciate family but in fact wants it more than anything in the world and feels like maybe he's not worthy of it and would do anything to prove that he is.
Seeing Stan figure out what he's good at felt important to me. Like he's never been good at anything in his life and he makes a stupid hokey joke and it suddenly turns into a profit. I felt like without [showing how the Mystery Shack was created], I was missing something and understanding why he would do this, how this would be the solution to his problem.
We would like the idea that Stan appears to win through dumb luck, that it's sort of Intelligence versus Guts but Stan wouldn't actually bet everyone's life on a dice roll. He's a cheater! At the end of the day, I believe Stan has been thrown out of Vegas for counting cards and for weighing dies and I believe he could con his way out of any game, particularly for an obnoxious wizard like this. The idea that Stan would gamble everyone on pure chance is like no. No, he's got a plan. This is the guy who escaped prison using gravity leaps, he's got a way out.
The one big thing [The Stanchurian Candidate] does is really highlights Stan's inferiority complex compared to his brother. Part of what he's doing is he's trying to be an important man here and this episode is actually a pretty good setup in many ways for Weirdmageddon Part 3. When we see Ford they're all going on this rescue mission to rescue Ford and this episode shows you just how much Stan wants to be the hero like the reason that he can't shake Ford's hand when they're in that circle. The cold open of this where he sees everyone loves Ford and now that Ford's back, he's the best. Stan's like “well, how about I run for mayor!” It's just to boost his ego and make him feel better about himself.
Dipper and Mabel
“Straight man protagonists are really hard to write because every other character had a comedic hook. We understand that Soos is kind of this weirdo, his brain is in another place. Mabel has this exuberance and sees the best in every situation and is very creative. Stan is a crooked conman. Dipper is… the normal guy and a character like that can often feel like they don’t have agency, start to feel just reactive.
Waddles is Mabel's only love that lasts the summer. Mabel is very prone to love at first sight and Waddles is able to love back with Mabel's degree of love.
[In Sock Opera] Mabel's in love with Gabe, Dipper's in love with the Author and they're both willing to do something crazy to get get closer to that thing
There kept being layers of adjustment to make it, “okay what would it take to get Dipper to make a deal with Bill?” 1: He would have to not understand the rules of the deal. He's been tricked, he thinks he's just giving a puppet, he didn't know was himself. Classic genie rules, you get what you wish for in a way you didn't expect. 2: There's a little ticking clock that just started, which if he doesn't do it by now, he's gonna lose all this. 3: Bill rightfully points out that Mabel has been kind of not sacrificing for him and he maybe needs another ally right now 4: He was sleep deprived and actually you'll notice that Dipper blinks right before Bill arrives and that's our way of suggesting that that countdown might not have even existed
I think Dipper and Mabel are of equal exact intelligence but Dipper's insecure. He sees his accomplishments as a way to make himself better and thus is motivated to focus on things that are accomplishment type things. And Mabel is very confident and likes having fun and when she's having a good time, she has a little tunnel vision for the people and the things around her. That's one of her biggest flaws. She's actually really, really sweet when she notices and understands your pain but not when she's doing a bit, when she's doing a scene, when she's doing a gag.
Ford
Originally [the fake Author] looked a little bit more like an oddball wacky inventor and I felt he had to be pretty idiosyncratic. There's certain color things about him you'll notice. He's more or less got the color scheme of the Journal, you know maroons and golds, so that you kind of feel instinctively like maybe that's him. A lot of these motifs though we would end up using in Ford's design, as well the gloves and the coat and all that but much cooler later on but preparing you, it's Ford Lite.
Now this is there's no logical reason that Ford would break [the warnings about the portal] up into all these books this way but up until this point he's been shown as this sort of all-knowing mysterious Puzzle Master that it felt appropriate, even though it's not logical.
It works for the storytelling so when Ford wrote that, that's when he was super sleep deprived. He realized that Bill had betrayed him, he was starting to have a hard time differentiating between fantasy and reality, he was losing sleep and scribbling all sorts of lunatic serial killer looking stuff about the end of the world.
In Time Traveler’s Pig, we see what should be a young Stanford Pines even though again, the design's a little off but we knew big sideburns, bushy hair. Although that Stanford looked a little bit more swole than this guy and that's one of the what we thought were very subtle clues in season one that helped a lot of fans figure figure everything out way too soon.
[Using the memory gun on the agents scene] needs to show that Ford's really awesome and so we could get rid of the agents and show that Ford can pretty much handle anything that Stan can't and also call back to our memory ray all in one.
There was a lot of fan speculation when we first met Ford. Generally when television shows introduce a new mysterious character late in the game, they turn out to be a villain like 9 out of 10 times. They turn out to be a villain or they're there to get killed off to show the stakes of something and like we could have made Ford evil but I always felt that that would be less interesting. The point that I was trying to get to is that Stan and Ford had this relationship that fell apart and it was both of their faults and I thought that if I'm Stan, I'd be more frustrated if Ford is actually a good guy. It would drive me insane if he's pretty reasonable, pretty rational, better at me than everything.
So we've flirted with this brief moment where it seems like he's a villain and we worked really hard to make it so that like his eyes are being covered by the reflection of the light. His dialogue is ambiguous enough here that for a moment you believe what Dipper believes, which is “maybe he's possessed by Bill.” You just saw him shaking Bill's hand, what is he supposed to believe?
I like that Ford has this photo with him, he had for a really really long time all the way through multiple dimensions. And he's probably told himself- I almost imagined if McGucket found that photo in his coat while they were working on the portal or something, like “What's this here?” and Ford would say “oh yes, that's a photo of a very important moment! That's when I… that's when I first decided I want to be an inventor!” There would be no reference to the real reason he's keeping it. “This is me and my brother.” It would be like, “oh yes I was thinking about science as a horizon, a frontier to reach towards– you know like a boat, like a ship, like science! It's about science!”
Soos
You choose family. That you create over the course of your life and if that somebody earns being your family, like the Mystery Shack. These kids and Stan, they’re Soos' family and he's happy about that.
I feel like Soos gained something out of [Blendin’s Game]. He gains the knowledge that like “I'm tired of thinking about this man who I'm missing, who doesn't care about me. I'm going to concentrate on the people in front of me, the people that are my true family.”
Soos is a fan of the show even though he's in it. He's a big fan of Gravity Falls and [NWHS] killed him.
I always knew what I wanted Soos’ end to be Soos running the Mystery Shack. I imagine that Soos is actually way better at giving tours than Stan is because he loves all that stuff truly and he believes it. That's part of the difference. Stan’s like “um, all right suckers, this stagnant puddle is the befuddle puddle!” while Soos is like “yeah, one time I looked in there, I think i saw like a cyclops dude. Like, I really think I saw one! Like it might have been a reflection combining my pupils, but like?” and people are like “Whoa, really??”
McGucket
They hired a bunch of people and then they erased their memory. That’s my explanation for why there's like such amazing inventions that would take whole teams of people. McGucket secretly hired a number of contractors and erased their minds. Like I think of McGucket as being like a really sweet nice guy completely in over his head who just like “oh well, once I've erased one guy's mind, I gotta erase ten more guys’ minds to cover it up” and it just sort of builds into like “I guess I'm kind of this kingpin of crime and I'm starting a cult I didn't mean to. Whoopsy daisy!”
When we get to Ford and see their backstory and see their relationship, it just makes all the stuff that happens with the portal and what happens with Ford and all that more poignant that he had someone there who was not only his friend but also a voice of reason and telling him to stop and that he wouldn't listen to him, as opposed to Ford being down there on his own with nobody to bounce off, anybody to say “hey wait a minute, is this a good idea?”
“McGucket was the assistant and he was maybe this assistant who was sort of put upon and Ford kind of brought a college buddy together with him. You know Ford as somebody who lost Stan, and even though he rejected his brother, he kind of needs that other person and he tried to find that in this kind of sweet prodigy and he just pushed him too far.
[The test scene] is meant to show sort of what it was that McGucket needed to erase, what it was that drove him to madness. It was partially seeing the Nightmare Verse and the way it messed with his head and also partly just realizing that this thing has apocalyptic consequences and he doesn't want to be a part of it. And if he can't destroy it or talk Ford out of something, he can forget about it.
Because If Ford's weakness is pride, McGucket's weakness is weakness. He's got a kind heart and he can't stop people, he can't destroy things. I mean he should have basically knocked Ford out with a wrench and take this thing apart piece by piece. He's the one who understood how to build it but I think he's kind of a follower and I think he's the kind of person who could get suckered in by a cult leader. He’s the kind of person looking for instruction and he really respects Stanford and can't bring himself to uh, he's like “I just got out of a bunker! I don't want to go work for another guy down in another bunker! This is my third doomsday cult this year!”
Stan and the kids
Stan and Mabel have such a different life perspective it seemed natural that at some point they would get to a major conflict
Seeing Grunkle Stan and Dipper bond like, I sort of believe that both of them are bad with women and both of them would rather believe there's a giant conspiracy than that they have they just can't get ladies
Can this idea about Mabel's relationship with Waddles actually reveal a rift between Mabel and Stan where Mabel and Stan actually get along pretty well in the series you know? When they they're both such strong stubborn personalities that when they conflict, they conflict hard like in Boss Mabel. But this idea that Waddles is sort of a metaphor for what Mabel loves and Stan loves Mabel but he doesn't really think that anything she thinks is necessarily smart or right. He loves her like “guys she's my sweet niece but she doesn't know anything you know? She doesn't know anything about a pig” She forgives a lot with Stan but like Waddles sort of represents like the purity of her deepest love and the idea that Stan would threaten that is genuinely a shock
In the previous season it ends with Dipper giving up his journal and there was a lot of argument about “oh is it lame if he just gets his journal back?” Another thing we struggled with, we knew that Stan knows the importance of this journal he wouldn't give the journal back to Dipper so it was a bit of a convolution we'd written ourselves into a corner. We wrote ourselves out, we said “okay he's photocopied it. he's giving it to Dipper because he knows that Dipper's really precocious and he'll never stop asking.”
“We knew that we wanted everything to come to a head when the kids are going to discover Stan's secret and they're going to discover it in such a way that they only get little bits and pieces and they have to decide for themselves based on the limited information. Is Stan's a good guy or if he's a bad guy? Ultimately that decision will be a decision of heart versus mind. And Dipper's mind, Mabel is heart and they're fighting with the scraps of information they have. Should we trust our heart about how we feel about this guy over the course of the summer and everything we've been through or should we trust the clues? That seemed like a believable way to get Dipper and Mabel to begin a rift between them that is resolved by the end of the series.”
The way Stan acts in [NWHS] is like, to me part of what feels so grounded about it is like I'm a child of divorce and like I know that when parents or parent figures know that hard times are coming for the kids. They kind of lay it on thick they're like who wants ice cream you know what I mean? Like Stan being extra nice to them at the beginning is like it's kind of a realistic thing that that adults do when they know like big changes are coming.
I felt it was really important that we added the scene where they're at maximum bonding. They're up on the roof, they're shooting firecrackers. Stan knows in his heart that when his brother arrives everything is going to change in ways he can't predict and he's really savoring this moment because he knows, even if things goes completely smoothly, which they don't. the kids are still going to be mad at him, especially Dipper for basically lying. They had this big meeting after the end of Scaryoke where of course Dipper also crossed his finger but Stan crosses his fingers and says “oh I'm telling you everything” and he knows that the kids are not going to be happy about the fact that he's been keeping this all from them because they've done amazing things together already and he should have trusted them before now.
This act break is them saying, “wait, Stan might be a random grifter who maybe killed our real uncle!” That's pretty heavy for any show let alone a cartoon show.
What that would mean for them if all this stuff is true is so much further than just like, “oh he lied to us about a couple things.” It's just like, “no he's straight up just some random dude that we don't even know uh and the guy that I've been pining for this whole time is dead!” We really try to stack the deck so it's like Mabel's perspective and Dipper's perspective are both kind of racing to see who gets in front and there'll be a moment where it's like yeah you kind of buy with Mabel she feels good about about Stan and then this scene is the most you’re ever with Dipper where we discover this huge crazy curveball and this feeling that you have looking at this newspaper and looking through these fake IDs this is how Dipper feels all the time. If you want a window about what it's like to be Dipper, this moment where a giant conspiracy reveals itself out of little pieces and seems to suggest that no one is trustworthy like that's that's where Dipper lives and this to him confirms every bit of suspicion and every bit of paranoia he's ever had and he's willing to run with it.
I love these characters so much that, for me I was like “I need to see Stan saying goodbye to the kids at that bus. And I don't want him to be some guy who isn't Stan, who doesn't even remember the kids.” That would be really dramatic. It might make you cry more but to me it doesn't actually mean anything. Their relationship which they've built, he was willing to sacrifice his memories to save them. That's how much they meant to him but because he was willing to do that, I think he deserves to get him back.
Stan and Ford
But I think Stan's hope is, that in Stan's mind this is going to play out one way which is that; he's going to free his brother, his brother's gonna come out of that portal after 30 years. Stan's probably imagining that Ford is weak, emaciated, wrapped in a blanket, that he'll stumble forward, through a beard. through blurry eyes, he'll be “my brother, is that you?” He'll embrace Stan, he'll hug him, he'll say, “all these years I thought I was goner but you saved me! I was wrong to mock you, I was wrong to call you the stupid twin! Dad was wrong about you! You're the greatest man and let's be friends again and who are these niece and nephew?” Like that was what Stan was kind of hoping. He knows it's there's a million things that could go wrong, including potentially the destruction of this dimension, but he so desperately needs to believe that he can make up for the problems of the past. He's hoping for this but he knows that things are going to change
When I started the series, I always knew Stan had a twin but all I knew about Ford from the jump was that he's everything Stan Isn't. So Stan is a guy with a huge chip on his shoulder, he's kind of a loser at life. There's somebody who is a winner at life or at least was a winner in all these ways that Stan wasn't.
We realized that in order to bring out the maximum amount of frustration in Stan, [Ford] needed to have a bit of a heart. Like here we see him being kind to the kids, he's not he's not all bad which is what's so infuriating to Stan. The idea that he would quickly get along with the kids when he can't get any respect from them. Ford is designed for what would bring out the most amount of conflict in the family. What would be Dipper's hero, what would be Stan's rival and who's somebody that we could empathize with. I mean, it’s hard to empathize with a character that comes out and punches one of your characters in the face, basically before he almost says anything.
You see that at this age, that all the stuff [in their room] that would cross over, that would appeal to both of them. It's not just like “there's science stuff here” and then there's “what Stan would be into.” but no, they both like all this.
There was also a version [of ToTS] where early on, they'd rigged the school water fountain. They did sort of like a caper, it was science and a scam together when they were in elementary school but we decided to save the science for the science fair stuff.
We played around with the idea that you would see them working together doing little science games or pulling little pranks. There was actually a scene that some of it was even storyboarded where they're in a treehouse together and Crampelter and his friends have tracked them down and are begging for their lunch money and Stan and Ford have used their jerkiness and geniusness to rig up like a water balloon throwing machine that knocks Crampelter in the head. I remember him saying, “oh no, my old-timey paper crown!” We were really hanging a lampshade on all these sort of Little Rascal cliches.
Ford's not a villain. You know he's getting in Stan's face and saying “I want my life back” but hopefully by the end of the episode even though you don't root for his perspective, you understand his perspective where it's like Stan ruined his science project, Stan shoved him into the portal, Stan took over his house. He’s not completely unreasonable to want it back and he's not completely unreasonable about his request. He says “okay you've got till the end of the summer” and Stan's little look there tells you everything you need to know about how he feels about the situation.
We needed pressure to be at the point where Stan and Ford recognize their lifelong rivalry and Ford does a sincere apology to Stan and almost more importantly, he acknowledges Stan's intelligence. He says “you wouldn't have fallen for Bill's nonsense.” He recognizes that his brother has a kind of intelligence he doesn't.
I always imagined that as kids, Stan and Ford were like this dynamic duo. They were getting into scrapes and like planning pranks and with Stan's creativity and Ford's genius that they were an unstoppable awesome team, before life turned them against each other. I imagine that as kids they were always swapping glasses and tricking their parents so that they could get double presents. And this is a move they did back in New Jersey constantly. We had to figure out who's gonna make a sacrifice and how and even though it's Stan who agrees to be “I'll be the one erase my mind, it's fine, it's worth it”, it's a sacrifice for both. Ford at this point is willing to get his brother back and he has to lose him again.
Stan and Ford, when they can finally work together, do bring out the best in each other. They just have been missing it for so long.
Post-mind return, Stan and Ford get along and that scene where they both threaten the bus driver gives a hint of what would happen if their powers were combined. We've never seen them working together as adults, they would be a really formidable duo.
Pines Family
[The Blind Eye has] such a great scene between Mabel and Wendy. We don't have a lot of scenes that are just them hanging out and she can kind of be like the cool older sister. Mabel's so obsessed with boys and Wendy's just like "yeah, whatever. They're a dime a dozen."
“in the storyboard, the postcard that Soos is holding up from New Orleans actually said Vegas and at the last minute we got really worried that people were gonna see that and think that that was a clue that Stan was Soos's deadbeat father. And because like our audience, we've trained them to look for clues and to connect dots, they start connecting dots that are not connected. And I called a late retake because, and I see people be like, “wouldn't that be cool if Stan was actually Soos's father” and I hate that headcanon. Whoever's listening and you think “that's a great idea!��-- that's a terrible idea!! Because it means that Stan ran out on his kid and then came back in his life. And weirdly pretends to not be his dad. It flies against the moral of this entire episode which is like, you know this guy who is Soos’ blood relative like cast him out and didn't come back and didn't make time for him and all these people did. These people are Soos’ real family and to say “Stan would be Soos' real father more if he was genetically–”, I'm like “no, no forget that!” Like relationships are about what you do. To me friendship is thicker than water and family is something you can create so I really didn't want anyone to think that we were suggesting that because to me, it actually wasn't just the wrong idea, it was like thematically against what the show's about.” "
"[In NWHS] Every character faces their worst possible choice, which is “Mabel must choose between Dipper and Stan” and “Soos must choose between Stan and the kids,” like “guard that thing with your life. I'm not going to explain to you why.” I believe that Soos would do anything to guard Mr Pines's secrets and these are the only two characters that could possibly make him doubt Stan, these two kids that he loves so much."
"For [DD&MD], you want to set it up as being like [Ford]'s like the coolest toy that's down in the basement that Dipper really wants to play with and he is not allowed to play with him."
"The first three quarters of the series are sort of about Dipper's crush on Wendy and this final quarter is sort of about his crush on the Author. He's such a fan of this guy and he's so used to being denied that which he's a fan of and he's never found anybody who cares about his nerdy stuff. Mabel doesn't care, Stan doesn't care, Soos cares but on a different level. He's so hungry for the approval of somebody like Ford This idea that they would bond over a nerdy board game felt like sort of the way to do this big idea in a sort of grounded way that I like better than like Ford presented Dipper with the Five Trials of the Genius Boy. “I passed these when I was your age! Can you do it too?” and it's like nope he just likes the same dork game that he does."
"The arrival of Ford is creating the two sets of twins starting to pair off between the Brainiacs and the Maniacs"
"Actually I enjoyed that [Ford putting the die in a cheap plastic case] got a little bit of a reckless side because it shows you the Stan part of him. The Stan part of Ford, the little bit that likes a little bit of danger, he likes a little bit of risk. If he would show that side, it would be in when he feels at ease, with a kindred spirit. Around Dipper he’d be like “isn't this pretty cool?” He'd never be that irresponsible around Stan. I like that Dipper is sort of a little bit of a Achilles heel for Ford as well. Ford has certain blind spots and Dipper exacerbates some of those just because he's willing to encourage, he's willing to “yes and” Ford towards whatever dumb idea he might have."
"Dipper, Mabel, Stan and Ford, they're all characters who need each other. Without Dipper, Mabel's just in a fantasy land. Without Mabel, Dipper is just sort of just spiraling into misery, spiraling into his own neurosis and not being pulled into those social situations, not growing as a person."
"You want [Stan] to be true to our various awful grandfathers, so I feel like for the most part you know that [being shitty to women] a plausible thing for Stan to do, that you only forgive because you know he's not a role model. Nobody wants to be like Stan. The kids never look up to him. The only person who looks up to Stan is Soos and Soos is enough of a comedy character that you understand the joke is “oh this guy thinks the worst way to live is good.” And then at one point you realize why. We made it clear why Soos looks up to Stan is because he gave him his job. He gave him a father basically, he’s essentially Soos’ father. And of course Stan who's had a life of just chaos and disappointment, the only person who would be a surrogate son is [Soos] but also Soos has the biggest heart in the world. So only the biggest heart in the world could forgive all of Stan's many flaws and also if Soos can love Stan, then maybe there's something in there worth loving, then maybe we can too."
"Stan, even when he's sweet, he still has to threaten to murder his niece and nephew."
"I do think the value of [Stanchurian Candidate] is that we're learning just how important it is that [Stan]’s seen. At this point, the kids have become a surrogate family. At the beginning of the show, they were just kind of a little nuisance and then he kind of tried out getting the family from them that he never got from his brother and the idea that he would lose them to his brother is his greatest nightmare and the only way he can really express that is by trying to be impressive to them and trying to be his brother's rival."
"Ford offers Dipper this apprenticeship because Ford sees Dipper as somebody who's special like himself. That Ford's great flaw is arrogance. He believes that there's special people and everyone else and that you can be held back by your siblings. That human attachments are actually weaknesses. The song and dance that he's giving Dipper right now is the exact song of dance that he gave McGucket back when they were younger which is like “sure you could continue working on your job and computers but you and me are different. We're better than everyone else, we have a path that no one else can understand. Only us can do this.” And it’s a very seductive idea for Dipper but he starts to be a little insecure here. He’s kind of “I can't believe it” and he's sort of right to be suspicious because Dipper is a smart kid but Ford's projecting. Ford loves Dipper because he sees someone who tell him yes to everything. He'll never challenge him and if Dipper had taken Ford's apprenticeship,Dipper probably would have gone the way of McGucket, turned into a kind of insane paranoid hermit with no friends, just kind of losing his mind. Like it's a seductive offer but also ultimately Dipper needs to learn not to try to grow up too fast."
"This entire time Dipper's been having this journey of self-discovery and seeing his future as this wonderful thing that he can't wait for. Mabel has been, piece by piece, seeing her idea of the summer fall apart."
"As Ford and Dipper's relationship grow stronger, Stan and Mabel also find much more sort of connection. They both feel like the sibling that's getting kind of sidelined."
"I think [amnesiac!Stan] would be hardest on Soos, second hardest on Ford but Soos would show it. Probably third hardest on Mabel, fourth hardest on Dipper just because where their hearts are. Dipper's not heartless, that's a testament to just how heartbroken those other characters are."
Series goal+ The Finale
"So our idea was; the memory gun can erase a concept as designated by the dial. It stores it. It records you and it keeps that recording and that if you watch that recording things start to come back a little bit, that it hasn't actually completely erased it from your mind. It's more sublimated somewhere where it's really really hard to reach and in the series finale, my concept of Bill is that; if he hadn't gotten in all those forms and fought Stan, Stan is the one that destroyed Bill. Were it just the mind eraser itself that he would be sublimated somewhere but he was weakened in the mindscape and destroyed in the mindscape. But Stan's memories were being sublimated and by looking at the scrapbook in the same way that McGucket's memories come back, they start to come back to the surface."
"I think part of what makes [NWHS] work also is that it has the strongest ticking clock. Yeah, I mean. it has a literal ticking clock. Also the sun is going down it's also, the town is starting to drift apart as the characters are starting to drift apart. There's just such a sense of Doomsday and even though we have like a three-part apocalypse, to me nothing feels as apocalyptic as this episode now."
"The entire purpose of [ToTS] is that Stan and his brother have had this huge rivalry that remains to this day and threatens to tear apart Dipper and Mabel and briefly does, and then Dipper and Mabel are able to find their way together, which is meant to repair Stan and his brother's past."
"Here we're teeing up the rest of the conclusion of the series which is just “whoa this is different. The status quo is shifted and is it going to shift us?” and that was the mission of this entire story was shift. Shift things such that it pits Dipper and Mabel against each other so that they can ultimately make things right and fix their uncles’ trauma in the process."
"“Let's try to set things into motion such that all of these characters who we love, who love each other are placed at maximum odds”. So Ford's entire existence in the series is basically a wrench in the relationships between Stan, Dipper and Mabel, that Stan has had a sibling who he didn't get along with and they've grown up having this horrible rift. Dipper and Mabel are these two twins who love each other but are very very different and are at this sort of volatile growing up moment where if something goes wrong could they turn out like Stan and Ford."
"[The convincing Gideon] scene works for me because it sort of represents the full completion of Dipper's Wendy Arc. Even though he's talking about Gideon and Mabel, he's really talking about himself. That idea that you can't force someone to love you but you can strive to be someone worthy of loving. It really does come down to like be the best you, you can be and the right person will see and feel that."
"It was gonna be W1, W2, W3 and then some kind of goodbye story. I remember it being something vaguely about some sort of other time travel. Bringing Blendin back because he just kind of vamoosed in the middle of this big story. There was that discussed like time traveling back to the first day when the kids arrived. The challenge was thinking of a valuable arc. So like each episode needs to have like a new problem and a new resolution and I was trying to brainstorm what's something that could feel valuable for like a final episode after the apocalypse, after Stan's mind has been erased and he's in the process of getting it back. "
"The thing I remember I wrote one out it was it's the last day of summer. Dipper and Mabel are packing uh they're planning to go home, they're feeling like nostalgic, they kind of don't want to leave. Blendin shows up and he explains that there's all these time bubbles left over, these weird anomalies because of all the time business and what Bill has done and just to watch out and be careful. Then Dipper and Mabel actually accidentally trip into one of these bubbles that are sent back to the very first episode or actually beyond the first episode, their first day in Gravity Falls um and somehow this was meant their character arc was to go from being like a little sad that they're going to leave Gravity Falls to seeing what it was like on the first day. When they were scared to be in Gravity Falls. The idea is like their first day they're like “oh Grunkle Stan, he's this weird old man and we hate living in this house and like we missed our place of comfort back home! And this is a kind of scary new adventure that we don't like.” The kids see their own growth and realize like “the way we felt about going to Gravity Falls like we don't think we can handle it, is how we feel about leaving.” That feeling of going into a new experience means that something new and exciting is going to happen you're going to grow. There was some thought that maybe over the course of that episode, Stan would get his memory back and something that the kids had done in the past would help him in the present, get his memory back.
"What's supposed to be happening here isn't that Stan's entire memory reappears in an instant. It's supposed to be a couple days of work and we see the beginning of that process when he looks at the scrapbook and then we're kind of jumping ahead a few days. maybe a week of just intensive memory therapy with Stan before he gets there."
"When we were trying to crack the half hour episode after Weirdmageddon, it felt like we were just kind of wallowing and Stan not having his memories. It was a very depressing thing. And we didn’t get to have Stan for the last episode, which was like “it's a great it's great i think you get the emotion like in this episode. It tears you apart when you see it. You could last a little bit longer on it. But going much longer, then you just feels like well what are we doing? Why are we just kind of wallowing in our own sorrows for no good reason.”
"When we had discussed the idea of an episode beyond this episode, a fourth episode, it was basically 20 minutes of [amnesiac!Stan]. This is so intense, you might think you want it but good lord, this is enough."
"Bill singing “We’ll meet again” was something that just felt like the perfect reference because this is kind of an ending about endings in a lot of ways and we know we know Bill's going to be defeated. We know that people like Vill and have grown attached to him and for him to sing “We’ll meet again” is sort of the perfect mysterious way to say like “I might be going, I might not be going.” It’s a reference to Dr Strangelove, a movie that famously ends with nuclear apocalypse and the song “We’ll meet again” so it's for those pop culture savvy. It's already tinged with a kind of a fear and an irony and the apocalypse built in, so it's perfect on a number of levels."
"The concept of the Zodiac as existing in our current canon is this idea that the prophecy was that friends and enemies would need to come together, seemingly impossible alliances would need to be made to stand up to Bill for this prophetic moment. You know that characters like Gideon who was who used to be an enemy, characters like Pacifica, like Robbie, that we've reached the point where thanks to the kids’ kindness and growth, they are now friends with Pacifica, they've resolved Robbie's jerkiness, they've helped McGucket with his memory. They've even overcome this issue with Gideon in W1 and so it seems like friends and enemies have all been restored, leaving only one thing which is Stan and Ford have to shake hands. And their pride once again is what dooms the entire world but they get so close."
"It's clear Stan, even though he's being stubborn here and holds things up, he's ready to do it. He clasps Ford's hand and then Ford can't help but correct his ignorant brother with something that doesn't matter at all after professing how important all this is and how important it is to put pettiness aside, he's the one who ends up being petty in the end."
"I like that Stan [during the deal] is just thinking “all right, think white, think white, think white.” He's like “think about nothing but sitting on your lazy boy.” "
"Stan and Bill had never interacted in the series up until this moment because he had just been taken over when he was asleep. We'd seen a lot of Ford and Bill, but Stan and Bill has never happened. And Bill sort of represents all the mystery and weirdness, and Stan is the guy who just wants to have a good life and protect his family. He's the one who never invited Bill in but he's willing to take Bill out."
"If Mabel's going home with a pig, Dipper's going home with this symbol of his friendship with Wendy. And even Stan he's wearing that Mabel sweater. That's a visual symbol of; he's softened up, he's embraced family, he doesn't need to be the tough guy all the time."
#gravity falls#stanley pines#stan pines#stanford pines#ford pines#mabel pines#dipper pines#soos ramirez#fiddleford mcgucket#i haven't even gone through all the eps for this lmao i decided this was way too much#anyway gravity falls is a story of found family and moving on from abuse and hurt#it's about growing up but keeping that childish wonder with you#and also how romance is overrated lol#like seriously so much of the family is chasing after crushes and that form of love#but in the end all they need is each other and learning to love themselves#stan hating himself while actually loving being who he is hurts me real bad tho...
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AITA for asking my boyfriend to stop watching porn?
This is pretty simple tbh. NSFW mentions of porn, sex, and masturbation.
🐣🐣
I am a transgender man and struggle a lot with sexual intimacy. I don’t think I’m on the ace spectrum, I just have a lot of insecurities and dysphoria that I’m working through. I still crave sexual intimacy, I just get very anxious about it. My boyfriend is understanding but a little pushy at times because he’s got a high sex drive. He doesn’t do it on purpose and backs off when I tell him to. Important to mention that my boyfriend is cis. So, because of this, my boyfriend usually takes care of himself. I help out whenever I feel comfortable.
Recently, we somehow started talking about porn and hentai (don’t remember the context of the conversation) and I asked him what he does when he takes care of himself. He said he watches porn, which I was surprised to hear but it makes sense because he has aphantasia. So, he can’t really imagine me or anything. Sometimes he uses my photos, but he said he needs some movement. At first I was fine with it, but then he mentioned that he only watches straight porn.
Now, I know my reaction was out of line, because I started crying and calling him an asshole for watching straight porn when he’s dating a trans guy. He’s pansexual, so he can really watch any kind of porn he wants, but I just started freaking out for some reason.
He kept telling me that there was no good gay stuff or ftm stuff, which is just straight up not true. There’s plenty of ftm nsfw content, but when I mentioned that, he said it felt weird and fetishistic.
I told him it hurts me when he watches straight porn, he said that’s stupid and he needs something to get off to. Fair enough but it still hurts me. There’s just something about me trying so hard to get past my anxiety and dysphoria so we can finally be intimate with each other and him blatantly disrespecting my gender identity that hurts like hell.
Plus, every time I suggested we do something that I’m into, he shot me down. I’m a bit of a kinkier guy and he’s very vanilla, despite insisting that he’s into the same stuff as me. I 100% respect his boundaries and never brought it up again. But I don’t think it’s fair that he won’t even try stuff with me that might make intimacy more enjoyable for me and then goes and watches straight porn. I keep trying to make our sex live work and he can’t even be bothered to figure out ftm bodies. Idk.
I talked to an online friend and they called me biphobic.
Am I out of line for trying to tell him what kind of porn to watch? Am I overreacting?
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That Damn Polaroid™ (and Some Thoughts on the Events in April/InStyle Stunt)
This polaroid... Nicola, Nicola, Nicola 😂
This polaroid still gets me today. Like, yes, this was for PR to some extent, BUT this was also SUCH a public statement. We know N has her phone ALL THE TIME. And (from what we know) the picture was on her phone for WEEKS (MONTHS technically). L appeared fine too with it being there (at least from what we know in the interviews where they talked about it). And that wasn't just like a cutesy little picture of two friends/coworkers. It was a 🔥/powerful pic. And as I mentioned here, N uses pictures as a way of communicating with others. And her excuse that she just "didn't have any pockets at the time", so she put the photo there (and proceeded to keep it there for MONTHS) 🙄 Sure Jan... So, with all of this context, I'm first going to talk about some of my thoughts on what was going on between L/A between the end of February to beginning of April, what was going on between L/N in April up until the Italy stops (including thoughts on the InStyle Stunt), and then at the end I will talk about my thoughts on WHY N had that photo on her phone for such a long time and the deeper meaning it might have had then just promoting the show.
Heads up, this is going to be a longg post...
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I think this post from @newghlan pretty much sums up what I think was going on between L/A during end of February to early April. There was MAJOR flirty energy between L/N during the VDay event and BAFTAs. I talked a little bit here about how there was a very brief clip from the BAFTAs where they look like they got caught when they were embracing each other. I highly recommend checking out the video if you haven't already, because the noverbal cues speak VOLUMES. And it's just interesting that they would look like they got caught at this public event? It read to me that for SOME reason, they did not want that small clip to be captured and put out to the public 🤔
My theories are that by the BAFTAs, A was NOT happy about L/N's chemistry and connection. Maybeee L promised to redirect his attention to A, which is why L wasn't seen at/didn't go to the Big Mood premiere, and why L took A to LA with him and agreed to the InStyle Stunt to appease her. I've never doubted that L has probably had feelings for A (although I still think it was/is fairly casual), but like tbh, I'm CERTAIN his feelings for N are SO MUCH DEEPER. So when those feelings came flooding back when they did reshoots in December 2023, and then had to proceed right into working on promotion in January (which I think just made all the feelings stronger), I feel like he probably had some guilt because he was TRYING to explore his relationship with A. BUT L was reconnecting with N, and I think emotionally, that's where his heart is at. And A noticed this, so she was upset (which honestly, is understandable imo- some of A's actions though because of these feelings she was having I definitely don't agree with). I think L was unsure though about going there again with N, and so he wanted to prove to A (and SPECIFICALLY to himself) that A was the one he wanted to be with. So he focuses his energies on A, agrees to the InStyle Stunt so she gets SOME kind of public acknowledgement (which was a BIG goal of hers in the relationship), and tries to distance some from N. That didn't reallyyyy work though, and then we got what we did for the rest of the tour between L/N.
Before I get to my thoughts on April between L/N, I want to list some specific timeline things around the InStyle Stunt:
L does the InStyle interview (in LA I believe?) near the end of March (so that's when L/A were in LA)
A posts the LA photos on her IG on April 7th and April 14th (and L likes these posts)- I believe she has since deleted another set of these LA photos, so idk what date she posted those photos (sometime in early April though I believe)
The InStyle article comes out on April 29th (with the accompanying Polaroid pics that prove A was in LA with him- this also confirmed that L had coordinated these photos with A to acknowledge (without publicly acknowledging) that he and A were an item)
L posts the non-polaroid photos from the InStyle article on his IG on April 29th (and N likes the post and comments (on April 29) "Yess dude!!")
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April/Early May Between L/N
L/N attend the Bridgerton Season 3 London Photocall on April 12 (which is where the photo above was taken AND where the infamous polaroid was taken). Earlier that day (I believe), L/N also did a series of interviews for the show, and those interviews had some SERIOUS flirty/sexual energy to them (including one of L's (not so subtle) butt pinches with N). I would highly recommend rewatching those interviews if you haven't. If anyone has the links to these particular interviews (N is wearing the same necklace, and L the same tank top and jacket that they are wearing in the picture above), please link them in the comments below.
L/N are at events in Bowral, Australia from April 21-23
L/N in Milan May 9 (with the interviews where they are disconnected and likely beefing)
L/N in Verona May 10 (and they are all cutesy with each other and seem back on the same page)
So here are my thoughts (and why the InStyle Stunt/article might have come into play as to why they had been beefing in Milan):
As I mentioned, I think L was TRYING to distance himself some from N in March and refocus his attention on A. However, I think that pull with N was still really strong, and BTS they were still having to see each other and communicate in order to prepare for their upcoming promotional events. My guess is that all this sexual/flirty tension was building up between them BTS in March, which is why they were soooo unhinged in those interviews before the London Photocall on April 12. I also think early April is when L was starting to realize that his feelings for N were coming back full force, and was maybeeee getting a little green light from N that the feelings were reciprocated (but they weren't actually addressing it because I think they were scared/nervous). However, I think they continue flirting with each other in April (maybe secretly through messaging, and also when they were in person).
Note: We also have to remember that L gave those polaroids to InStyle (most likely) at the end of March when he did the interview. Therefore, the InStyle Stunt was set in motion by that point. I've been wondering though recently, if he had known what was going to happen between him and N in April and early May, if he might not have gone along/set up the InStyle stunt 🤔 Just some thoughts I've been having...
Then we get to the Bowral events near the end of April (BEFORE the InStyle article comes out though, confirming L had coordinated this with A), and it seems pretty obvious to me that L is trying to test the water with N and see how she's feeling about them (they are both being a little publicly flirty, but L much more so imo (N still seems to have a lot of her walls up in public)). It makes sense L might be hesitant to open himself back up to N when, as I talked about here, I think he got his heart broken a little by N. However, I think N was starting to open herself up to the possibility of really trying with L (because I think she has ALSO loved him for a while, but just was never in the place to really commit to the relationship for various reasons). I think she was finally feeling though that she was ready to give this relationship a serious shot, but knew L was kind of in a relationship. I think N was under the impression though that it wasn't super serious, so I think she was hopeful she and L might be able to figure it out.
A lot of people have been commenting that the InStyle Stunt/article wouldn't have upset N because she would have already known about it because of the pictures A posted in early April. I disagree. Now, we obviously don't know 100% if N knew that L was going to add those polaroids to the article. Tbh, we also don't 100% know if she even knew about the pictures that A posted of the LA trip (because I don't get the sense N exerts a whole lot of energy and time following what A does). Yes, N commented and liked L's post on April 29 related to the InStyle article. However, that does not confirm that she had already read the article. And she wasn't going to unlike and remove her comment, because fans would have noticed and flipped out. I am more inclined to believe that she really wasn't aware that this was all going to go down, mainly because I think L didn't want N to know/was trying to be sneaky about it. I think once N figured it all out after the article came out, the thing she was most upset by was how this article proved L had coordinated with A to indirectly publicly announce that they were an item (while L was continually putting out to the press at that point that he was single). Therefore, I think N was pi**ed because she didn't want this to impact their tour/her (their) public image. And secondly, I think she was upset because of the feelings she was having for him, and how flirty he had been with her the last few months. I think it all caught N off gaurd, and her walls went WAY back up. And we have to remember that this all happened just a few days before the Milan event, so I think that energy between them just spilled over and resulted in their very disconnected nonverbal cues in Milan.
I talked a little bit more about my thoughts on Italy here, but I think after L/N got back on the same page emotionally, it was pretty much game over emotionally with A for L. His heart wasn't really in it anymore (and tbh, I don't think it ever really was). Also, I've said this multiple times, but Italy is when N starts posting the "boyfriend pics" of L (which L obviously agreed to). Personally, I think N (and indirectly L) were sending a message to a certain someone 🤔 But just a theory... I have also already talked about it here and here on my theories on why L was never going to be able to publicly untangle himself from A for a while, regardless of what was going on BTS with L/N.
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What Could be the Deeper Meaning Behind the Polaroid?
So, my point with everything is this. I think early April was a MAJOR turning point for N in terms of her feelings/emotions for L. Here are my thoughts (outside of PR) on why N put THAT Polaroid on her phone from the London Photcall event on April 12 (and for MONTHS):
First, we need to acknowledge that L obviously approved of this photo being on her phone (or at least was complicit to it), which I think speaks VOLUMES about where L was at emotionally with N at the time (and where L WASN'T at emotionally with A). This confirms to me that things just weren't that serious with A, even if he was TRYING to refocus his attention on A. L's heart was still with N.
N wanted people to know that they were a unit through this experience, and that N truly loves him and their friendship/connection. She wanted to share to the world how special he AND their experience on Bridgerton is to her.
I think she put that SPECIFIC picture on her phone because her feelings were STARTING to change for L around this event/that general time period. I think N was starting to see L in a bit of a new light (in a positive way), and was seeing some real potential between them.
Lastly, I think one of the reasons she kept the photo on her phone for so long (outside of the PR), is because her walls were starting to come down, things were getting more serious between her and L, and she was happy (and she wanted the public to know 😉). And L/N could kind of hide behind this unspoken public narrative that it was just for "PR" (which I NEVER bought).
Now yes, she has since changed the polaroid. However, we have NO idea what the photo is of now (or if she is consistently changing it out/or completely changed her phone case). She knows our obsession with the Polaroid though, so I think she likes to tease us about it. She knows what she is doing 😉 That OG polaroid though during the PR tour had a MUCH deeper meaning than just promoting the show, and was a significant public statement about her relationship with L. Just my theory though...
#just my thoughts#lukola theories#timelines#InStyle Stunt#that damn polaroid 😂#a picture is worth a thousand words#April was a MAJOR turning point for N me thinks 🤔#What I wouldn't give to know EXACTLY WHY N had that polaroid on her phone for the whole world to see 😂😅
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𝕰𝖞𝖊𝖘 𝖜𝖎𝖙𝖍𝖔𝖚𝖙 𝖆 𝖋𝖆𝖈𝖊 𝕭𝖎𝖑𝖑𝖞 𝕷𝖔𝖔𝖒𝖎𝖘 𝖝 𝕽𝖊𝖆𝖉𝖊𝖗
Tw:Toxic relationships, cheater!Billy, Y!Billy, unhealthy obsession, possessive behavior.
You knew he was cheating on you. He had made it quite obvious. He always acted like the boyfriend of Sidney Prescott which he was. You couldn’t blame her she didn’t know that you were originally his partner.
You didn’t know how to tell her would she get mad? I bet she would, if she had knew he had slept with other women. You were definitely not over that.
You didn’t know if anyone would believe you. If the whole group would go against you then the whole school. Since many girls liked Billy and would probably believe anything that came out of his mouth.
So you didn’t say anything. For a little while Billy would taunt you in a way by bringing girls over at your place. Saying that you were nothing to him. Telling you that he only used you for your body (you never fucked) basically slut shaming you for sharing nude pictures of yourself.
You only sent him those because he had practically manipulated you into doing it. Saying how he’ll break up with you or it’ll make him sad if you don’t.
He also scared you back then. He had anger issues still has. But you were scared of him going into an anger outburst worrying that he would hurt you.
He would never in reality.
You could never understand him one day he would be all loving on you then the next go cheat on you. It also reminded you about the times you we’re together alone it was just silence with Billy ignoring you existence not even alone. When you were out in public at school he would act like you weren’t even there. In front of everyone. Even when you gave him a lot of attention. Fuck you had gave him small gifts you thought he’d like. You were there during his darkest time and this is want he fucking does. Of course you weren’t expecting anything of it but you wouldn’t think he would do this. Well you had enough, realizing that the relationship you were in was unhealthy and awful. you broke up with him. You had sadly wasted your life.
At first he could careless. You were nothing to him only something he could use for his own pleasure.
Soon he felt empty. He didn’t feel the same like he did with you. He tried his best to shake it off but he couldn’t. When he was with random girls or Sidney. He doesn’t feel anything. It doesn’t help that you stopped hanging out with the group. He couldn’t even see your face anymore. He didn’t know what came over him but he needed your affection. Once you left he felt like his whole world was gone. He never felt complete or comfortable. He knew you didn’t want to see him again. After everything he had done.
But his ego was stopping him from apologizing. So he tried his best to forget you. But he couldn’t. It didn’t help that he had some of your stuff those photos, the gifts that he dug up. Since he had carelessly thrown those to the side not caring about the thought you had put into them. He was just starting to realize that he undermined everything you had done for him. He missed it. It didn’t help that you we’re finding comfort in different friends. It made his made his blood boil when he saw you hanging out with other guys.
He didn’t care for the context he felt heart broken that you had moved on that easily. He wished that he could kill everyone one of those guys who dared to speak to you.
You felt more happier then you ever did. You questioned why you never broke up sooner. You felt more free. But you never would have thought the roles would be reversed.
It was soon Billy constantly calling you wanting to get back together. Leaving gifts in your locker. You didn’t know what could have gotten into him. Suddenly he was sweet with you. Was he just manipulating you? So he could do it all over again if you get back with him.
Billy is always cornering trying to get you to talk to him. You don’t say anything though but shove him away each time. He doesn’t get why you don’t want to be with him. He shown he’s sorry, and doing so much for you. Aren’t you able to forgive him a bit.
But he crossed the line a little. One day he hugged you from behind whispering sweet nothings to you in your ear. Venting his frustrations about you talking to other guys. Then telling you something you won’t forget.
“I won’t ever let you go”
*I’m sorry for not posting in a while. And sorry if the end seems rushed it was this was also a little test for something I want to know if you would want me to go more in depth for this.
#slashers x reader#slashers#scream x reader#scream#yandere billy loomis#yandere billy loomis x reader#billy loomis x reader#billy loomis#cheater billy
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The Art of Asking Girls to Pose with or for you
It happens more often than you'd think: guys asking me for a photo somewhere. It could be in the city, in the park, at a bar, or even in a store. While sometimes I agree, 9 our of 10 I say no. And it's not because I always wouldn't do it, it's just because most guys are clueless on how to ask.
Let's explore why girls might not want to take photos with you and how you can increase your chances of getting a positive response.
This is just from my experience and I am just trying to help by talking about the things guys have done wrong, ok?
Why Girls Will Say No
Personal Boundaries: Everyone has different comfort levels with personal space and interactions. A girl might not feel comfortable taking a photo with someone she doesn't know well.
Privacy Concerns: In an age where photos can be shared instantly online, some girls might be wary of where their image could end up. We don't like the idea to be shown around as your girlfriend somewhere!!
Mood and Context: If she's having a bad day, is in a rush, or simply doesn't feel like it, she might decline.
Safety: Unfortunately, there are instances where women have to be cautious about their interactions with strangers for their own safety. Creeeeeps!
It's crucial to understand that it is always up to the girl whether she wants to take a photo with you. Respect her decision without any negative reactions.
How to Increase Your Chances
1. Judge Her Context:
• Is she in a rush? If she looks like she's on a mission, it's best to let her go.
• Does she need help? If she seems like she could use assistance, offering help or being useful can be a good way to start a conversation, for example if you can help her with a suitcase. Make sure you help her first, before you ask for the photo though!!
2. Make It About Her:
Use the context to show that you care about her comfort and interests. For example, if you're at a park and she seems to be enjoying the scenery, you could mention how beautiful the park is and ask if she'd like to capture the moment together.
The good news about this tip is, it really works any guy, no matter what you look like. Most girls don't care about looks in guy, but more about how he makes them feel. It's like the biggest superpower guys have and most don't even know it!
3. Be sensitive, dial down the creep factor
Don't come on too strong. Being overly enthusiastic or intense can be off-putting. Keep the interaction light and friendly.
4. Offer a Compliment (yup, those still work!)
A genuine compliment can go a long way. For example you can compliment her for the choice of outfit she made for a specific night out in the context she is in, like playing pool at a bar.
Girls put a lot of thought into what to wear. Showing that you are into fashion from her point of view and care about the effort she put in is a great ice breaker!
Try to make it about her and not about the clothes she has on. E.g., "I love how you choose a leather mini for this occasion. Such a cool idea." Not: I love your leather mini. Huuuuge difference.
5. Pay close attention to her Reaction:
Pay attention to her body language and verbal cues. If she seems receptive and positive, you can proceed to ask for a photo. Don't continue if she looks mad, regardless of if you think you messed up or not. Just say sorry and leave. Trust me! Nothing is more aggravating than a guy who can't find the exit in a moment like this.
6. Finally, the Ask: Make her 100% comfortable and be transparent.
When you ask, do so politely and respectfully. Always ask "Is it okay if..." or "Can I..." before each step to make her feel in control.
Ask if you can be in the shot or not, first! Don't assume she agreed on a selfie!
Turn on the shutter sound, so she knows you only took one photo at a time.
Always show her the photo right away so she can see how it turned out.
If she doesn't like it, delete it immediately. Don't argue. Just delete it immediately!
Ask for her permission to take a new one, each time!
If she asks you to delete the photo, do so immediately and show her that you've deleted it from the trash as well. This shows that you respect her wishes and privacy.
Remember, the key is to be respectful and considerate. A positive interaction is more likely to lead to a positive response. Happy photo-taking!
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Teory📔📘; When Blue Meets Yellow In The West
I have been replaying the Third Season for a few days now, and the most iconic phrase within it; "when blue and yellow meet in the west" has made me very curious.
In ST these tones are used to symbolize how couples (both in a friendly and loving context) begin to know or "find" such tones we find in scenes such as
The photos of Eleven and Max;
and on the tiles of the bathrooms where Steve and Robin were;
Just as these tones are found in different scenes used in contexts with couples that were previously presented to us. But what matters here is that this phrase is present in moments prior to which two specific characters are about to share important moments between them.
And ow this symbolizes personal growth for both people.
In the case of Eleven and Max, Max makes Eleven learn that her individual life is much more than what Hopper or Mike tell her, and that there are more better things in the world than "stupid boys."
Teaches her to be herself, and at the same time Max becomes Eleven's first best friend, which is important for both of them even later in the S4. Max provokes in Eleven a feeling of independence and empowerment.
Which she later uses to end her relationship with Mike after he lied to her (I'll talk about that specific scene in another blog).
Also!!: I would like to honor the detail that Max has the green during this specific scene that shows Eleven the Wonder Woman comics, which in simpler words symbolizes the fact that Max already has the blue and yellow in she
Moving on to the Robin and Steve scene, specifically Robin is a character that is used to be related to Steve for the same reason as Eleven and Max.
Of course, each scene is different, but if we realize, in both contexts they have a similar problem, which is love problems.
In the bathroom scene where Robin and Steve talk, Steve begins to give Robin some hints that show that he is romantically attracted to her.
She ends up rejecting him by coming out to him as a lesbian woman, but even so she does not act offended by this, but rather a friendship arises directly between them. something that Steve also needs, realizing that there is more to the world than just wanting to get a girlfriend, and that he still has a lot of internal development ahead of him.
(I will also analyze this scene in another blog)
Taking into account the scenes that we have just rescued where yellow and blue are predominant in both couples, yellow and blue are not as such couple tones, as in the case of Mike and Eleven.
Something that is even somewhat difficult to find using these shades while the two are together, not counting the covers, and also the moments like this one that I have marked.
Taking the fact that explains that in the context of "when yellow meets blue in the west" symbolizing that they are important colors that are taken for important moments and where there is an individual advancement in both people being united.
Why then does the original couple, who are supposed to have yellow and blue predominating in them, not move forward together?
The answer is simple: They do not advance in the way that is expected when being together.
Let's take for example a dialogue that was supposed to be important for both of them, the scene in which they were trying to heal Eleven's injured leg after training against the MindFlayer.
During this scene we are presented with Mike trying to talk to Eleven, as Lucas had repeatedly told him earlier in the episodes after she finished him off.
We can see that during these dialogues, Mike tries to talk to Eleven more directly about how he feels about her, the simple act of apologizing, telling her that he was an idiot for lying to her, or perhaps a simple "I love you, forgive me for not telling you the truth" but while he tries he only manages to stumble over his words and confuse Eleven, not knowing what he was referring to, not understanding Mike's hints in his words and the way in which he himself was trying to tell them.
And can even take into account that before telling him something important he is interrupted by the walkie talkie.
So why didn't Mike just try to tell Eleven directly what he had screamed moments before she got hurt?
It's simple, both had already found their yellow and blue moments before, both realized different things, which later causes their development to begin to fall behind, because they both (specially Eleven) don't need that.
and that's why in this scene, after talking to Eleven about being in contact with her, he acts so confused after she brings up what he had said earlier, and Mike just says he doesn't remember.
That is why when she kisses him and tells him that she loves him, he acts confused, his simple gestures are as if he did not expect that to happen, because he was thinking of saying something very different to Eleven during the failed dialogue they had.
But now, let's see about the yellow one that Mike found when Eleven was not with him.
In which he even had the green with him during that specific scene that I would like to discuss.
Taking into account this specific scene we can realize that it is the complete opposite of how he is expected to behave with Mike, when Eleven tells him that they broke up, Mike does nothing but get upset and go home being angry as hell. same way, but when he has this argument with Will during the pressure of the moment, he simply makes the decision to go after him, knock on his door until he gets tired and tell him that he had been a complete idiot, that he wanted to talk things over with him and without letting him to shout his name and knock on his door.
At the same time, we can take into account that both scenes are totally different, in the scene where Eleven ends up with Mike, there is a big sun, a lot of people, a relaxed atmosphere, but when Mike argues with Will, everything becomes sad, there is no sun, it's raining.
And both end up with emotions twice as strong as they were before.
We can take this as the fact that Eleven had already found her blue, and she felt complete because of it, she didn't need Mike. But in Mike's case everything got even sadder because he still didn't get his yellow, and he felt like he was losing him.
In the case of Robin and Steve, they did not have yellow and blue in their clothes, but there was in their surroundings. I would like to use it in this context to show that although we already gave a more psychological meaning to yellow and blue, the phrase, taken literally can represents a sunset.
and we not only see this in the scene we took, but also in the scene from the season before this one, "crazy together."
and in another scene later, the scene after the fourth season ended
Specifically, I use this because it is an allegory to what I am trying to communicate with this, they are both sitting together, and the sun is touching them both.
At the same time, if I remember correctly, several of the most important scenes in the context of Mike and Will have been after "yellow and blue meet."
I know what you may be wondering, if I'm using the phrase for a more friendly context when putting friendly couples, why specifically Mike and Will don't I put them there too?.
It's simple, because they have already passed that phase, and their relationship has been growing over time, in a more personal and even deeper way even if they were not together, and because the phrase is not only used for friendly couples.
and, no, yellow and blue does not represent Mike and Eleven's relationship, because we can see that after several important moments during Eleven's individual development, she stops using yellow or blue, even during season four she begins to use the blue.
They make it clear to us that Eleven does not need a yellow or a blue to be able to move forward, because if the previous development she had with Max left her.
Is that she can be her own blue and yellow, even another different tone or the one that she wants to use.
For that same reason during the scene where Mike and Will meet after fighting, Mike wears green, hoping that Will could see that he would be both shades for both of them, but, at the end of the day, they would end up completely matching each other.
That's the same reason why, in previous seasons and even episodes within that season, they both continue to use them individually, and have so many important moments together.
Thanks so much for reading. 💛💙
#stranger things#stranger things 4#the party#mike wheeler#st5#will byers#byler tumblr#byler endgame#byler is canon#when blue meets yellow in the west#platonic mileven#eleven hopper#byler#eleven stranger things#eleven x max#robin stranger things#the duffer brothers#please duffers#max stranger things#byler nation#stranger things 5#elmike#teory
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AITA for not bringing my brother’s dead horse back to life immediately?
Some context, my brother is also my husband (and before you cancel me- I have no marital options other than family members or some naked guy with flasks on his butt, also I’m attaching a photo of my brother and you’ll understand) and he has a horse called Leonard who he loves (probably more than he loves me).
Seriously, he learnt gravity magic to keep this horse around. Gravity magic. He’s the strongest gravity sorcerer in the lands between for this horse.
So anyway we had a vow and I brought him back to life as part of that vow, and immediately he was like ‘where’s Leonard?’. Now he didn’t mention Leonard when we made the vow, but in fairness to him given he learnt gravity magic for this horse I should have realised he’d want the horse brought back to life too.
I don’t actually know how to bring a horse back to life- are the laws different for a horse versus a demigod? I already messed up bringing a demigod back to life once too, so I’m a bit worried.
Anyway, obviously I’m gunna bring the horse back to life. I just want some time to a, bring my sister back to life first and b, work out how to bring a horse back to life.
But my husband keeps saying that the horse is more important than my sister, I think he’s still mad that she beat his ass in a fight? (Im still mad that they were fighting at all but here we are).
Anyway, I’ve sent my followers to go find a horse corpse to give this a go, but they haven’t come back yet. Im starting to worry about them T H it’s been a while. Am I the asshole for not bringing Leonard back immediately?
Update 1: Followers still aren’t back with horse corpse, not sure what to do at this point.
Update 2: the naked guy with flasks on his butt is here and covered in blood, really concerned about my followers.
Update 3: this naked guy is saying he killed my sister and my husband is trying to start beef with him. Horse issue might be on hold for a while.
Update 4: we’ve beaten this naked guy like 60 times but he keeps coming back this is definitely going to delay finding a horse corpse.
Written by myself and @cereselcosplay
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while i understand why some viewers would be puzzled by Achi's quietness, reserved energy, and the way he nearly always lets Karan take the lead - which might make it seem like he isn't invested in the relationship - for me that is actually an element I really like because it makes certain moments hit a lot harder.
the way I've been interpreting it is that Achi's critical insecurity and lack of self-worth is still deeply rooted and trying to keep him stuck in his default closed off/blend into your environment behavior model. that is certainly not going to go away overnight, but the more he interacts with Karan in this new romantic relationship context, the more opportunity Karan has to start chipping away at the barrier that keeps Achi from letting himself feel comfortable in a state of being loved. and it seems like a challenge that Karan is more than happy to take on, because you can see how giddy he gets when he's able to get a full-bodied positive reaction out of Achi. like when Karan said, cheezily and with an air of ridiculousness, that he had opened the bottle for Achi so Achi wouldn't wear himself out.
like Karan is RELISHING having elicited this wide, full-faced smile out of Achi.
we also saw Achi being treated like an object of beauty as Karan poses him for photos. he's being handled preciously by Karan, and for me this read as 'aaaaaahhhhhh my heart is racing i cant breathe, i've never felt like this before, i love this feeling.' It's a quiet and inward-facing response, but it has a huge amount of significance in regards to Achi's self-image. He is realizing through all of Karan's careful and loving gestures and affectionate gazes that he is beautiful in Karan's eyes - and he's starting to believe it himself, helping him build the confidence to begin responding fully to Karan and extending himself in turn.
We can estimate that Achi has probably never been comfortable with photo taking because he is so self-conscious about his body, and it takes the first half of the date for him to loosen up. but later on when Karan asks Achi if he would be interested in being photographed even more to fill the time before dinner, Achi agrees readily and with a smile, because he has become that comfortable in Karan's company. and Karan, again, is delighted at this slow but steady change in Achi's receptiveness to being loved and adored.
It does seem like Achi isn't vocalizing his feelings nearly as much as Karan. But remember - most of Karan's deepest, most intense romantic pinings have occurred in his thoughts and not out loud, because he's very concerned with Achi's comfort and doesn't want to scare or overwhelm him. Karan is open with his body language and more than comfortable offering signs of his care and affection, a stark contrast to Achi.
Achi, on the other hand, hasn't quite let himself believe that he's worthy of Karan's love and instead seems to think that Karan has made a horrible mistake. This is changing, and we are starting to see how Achi is slowly letting himself believe that this is real and that Karan knows who he is and is in love with him, the real him - and this naturally leads Achi to start viewing himself as a lovable person.
But one side effect of Achi having spent so long doubting Karan's affection for him is that he seems to have tried to squash any hope he might have inside him that anything good could happen to him, that he could really have a claim to Karan and Karan a claim to him. This is an act of self-preservation, in case Karan 'comes to his senses' and realizes that Achi is actually boring, unremarkable, and unworthy of being cared for by anyone.
So when Achi starts to let hope seep in, it really is precious. in episode 7, he expresses genuine fear about revealing his mindreading to Karan - because the outcome could likely be that Karan will be put off and not want to be around Achi anymore. he and Karan had reached a point of promise and new beginnings (love! hope!), and Achi doesn't want to risk losing Karan as a lover.
Achi also had a moment of real vulnerability this episode, when he tells Tanaka that Karan's support has been a source of motivation for him to continue striving for self-growth. Achi's eyes are welling with emotion, and Karan definitely wasn't expecting an admission like this from Achi.
Achi is visibly having a rough time in the meeting with Tanaka, and reacts with a look of panic when Tanaka asks what would happen if he and Karan broke up, as well as when Karan offered to resign.
Achi had allowed himself to feel hope at the prospect of having Karan be a part of his life, and is starting to panic as complications threaten their ability to start laying a foundation for their relationship in earnest. He's racking his brain for ways to help Karan, covering his eyes as he builds himself up to look at Karan's sales number like its a horror film, and checking in with him/worrying about Karan non-stop.
Favorite moment of the episode: Karan being as explicit as he's ever been about his romantic aspirations ("No obstacles can come between our love now") and Achi looking like he feels like the most special boy in the universe, UNDENIABLY very excited to hear it but also embarrassed - and Karan is so tickled to have gotten that reaction from him.
The episode ends with Achi singing along with the song in Karan's head and being adorably playful when Karan brings him candy. I feel like Achi is a stray cat that Karan is trying to tame, except in this case Achi's feral quality is his insecurity hindering outward expression and Karan is 'taming' him by providing him the comfort and safety to be himself. Every time Karan wins a moment of Achi allowing his true feelings and personality to shine through, I think of someone being like 'mom, the cat I've been trying to win over - he's coming up to sniff my hand now!'
Something to be excited about in next week's episode based on the preview: they have clearly broken through the physical affection barrier. Ecstatic hugs, heads in laps, holding hands in bed, piggy back rides...Achi is going to further permit himself to feel and want things and indulge those wants, and also give Karan affection in return, showing that he is just as happy to be with Karan as Karan is to be with him, and just as invested in the future of their love story. While its been a journey mixed with slow and subtle growth, I really do love and appreciate how the narrative is allowing Achi the time and space to transform how he views himself and how that translates to his relationship with Karan.
more thoughts here
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When Love Reveals Itself
The intersection of public and private in life and art.
A few years ago I watched Her Private Life, a k-drama starring Park Min-young and Kim Jae-wook, both of whom I love seeing on-screen, and ONE (Jung Jae-won) who is adorably cute in this series.
If you haven't seen it, here's a synopsis...
It's ostensibly about an art gallery curator - Doekmi - and her relationship with Ryan, the newly appointed director of the gallery (a position she deserved but of course didn't get). That part of narrative is a highly satisfying but predictable rom-com.
Doekmi is also a secret fangirl, and tries desperately (hilariously) to hide this side of her life, but that doesn't work out. I love the way this is dealt with and the understanding of the complexities of fan culture shown by the writers and cast. It's very relatable.
But maybe most importantly, this was one of the first k-dramas I watched that had an overtly queer narrative strand. I wont spoil anything but Ryan (Kim Jae-wook) is an absolute fucking legend in his efforts to be an LGBTQIA+ ally, even if he gets EVERYTHING wrong.
So how does this relate to our photo of Jimin, knee deep in water and smiling like this?
Episode 5 of Her Private Life has one of the most poignant scenes I've ever watched in a k-drama.
The scene isn't part of a major plot point but there are SPOILERS here.
The scene centres on an unpublished self-portrait taken by (deceased) renowned photographer-Yoon who was famous for his landscape photography. The portrait was his final photograph, taken just before he died.
The portrait was gifted to a reclusive writer who was lifelong friends with photographer-Yoon. He owns the rights to the photo, and he won't release it for publication.
The portrait in question
Deokmi and Ryan are trying to convince the writer to allow the portrait to be displayed in an upcoming exhibition of work by photographer Yoon. The writer adamantly refuses.
Why?
Yoon is looking at someone he loves.
As Deokmi observes, the portrait shows Yoon smiling not at the camera, but at someone in front of the camera.
He is looking at someone he loves.
For the writer, the portrait reveals too much. It exposes photographer-Yoon's feelings for the person in front of the camera, who is of course the writer himself. The writer knew of Yoon's feelings for him but could never acknowledge them while his friend was alive.
Lets go back to the photo of Jimin.
Something that really struck me about this photo of Jimin is the context of it. It was during the LGO MV shooting. He was splashing Jin and laughing, creating a small, happy moment for the music video (for us).
But covid was rife and the world was at a standstill. Jimin was personally and privately devastated during this time*. It was part of the MV brief, I'm sure, to show that you could still find joy in simple things but we know he himself was not happy.
So the happiness we see in those images is not his personal happiness. Even though he does genuinely look like hes having fun, that happiness is manufactured for us.
And then he looks up at the photographer and this we get this poignant, beautiful smile. Open, unguarded, and holding nothing back, his expression is so soft, so genuinely glad to see the person behind the camera.
He is looking at someone he loves and who he knows loves him in return.
"I see you, and everything is better. The sun comes out because you’re here with me," It says.
There's a stillness in this image, as though Jimin -singled out - stopped what he was doing to look back at the photographer, shutting out all the activity surrounding the two of them and stealing a quiet moment with that person.
And that stolen moment would have remained secret and private forever, had the photographer not shared this photo.
But they did.
The photographer gave it to us.
Was this just for aesthetic reasons?
I don't believe so.
Of course, it is a beautiful portrait of Jimin. Aesthetically and emotively it's a striking photograph, but there must me HUNDREDS of beautiful photos of Jimin. The photographer could have chosen ANY of them. But they chose this one.
Now we have this moment on record.
We get to see Jimin feeling this love. We see him the way the photographer sees him. And yes, we know who he is looking at.
We know who was behind the camera.... because the photograher shared this with us too.
Jungkook makes sure we know who took that photograph.
His Private Life becomes Art
In the drama series, the writer relents and takes Doekmi and Ryan upstairs to show them a locked room. It is full of photographs of himself, taken by photographer-Yoon over many years. In all of the pictures, he looks happy. Deokmi describes it as 'a love letter to the writer, from Photographer Yoon'.
The writer admits that he is ashamed that he never acknowledged Yoon's feelings. He didn't dislike them but he didn't have the courage to respond to them, which is why he can't release the portrait now. He can't reveal to the world how Yoon felt, when its too late to tell him that he knew, and that he didn't reject that love.
Ryan looks around at all the photos and says "Did you really ignore his heart? This smile does not look like it. You did not know your own heart, but photographer Yoon could have known it. As a photographer, how could he not notice it. He knew."
Their Private Life becomes public
That photo of Jimin is everywhere. Jungkook made sure of that.
The reticence of the two men in Her Private Life is nowhere to be found here.
Jungkook took this photo of the man he loves and one look at Jimin's face tells us that love is returned.
Just like photographer Yoon, Jungkook saw it and he knew we would all see it too.
But instead of hiding the picture in a locked room for decades, Jungkook published it in the most public forum imaginable. He put it into the music video for Life Goes On.
He consciously chose for us to see that photo.
Don't forget, he was the director of that music video too...
That private stolen moment, full of love and fondness, shows Jimin at his softest and his most vulnerable.
And maybe that's a side of Jimin only Jungkook sees. Maybe Jungkook wants us to know the Jimin HE knows. The open, unguarded Jimin who wears his heart on his sleeve the way Jungkook does. The most authentic, unafraid, beautiful Jimin.
The Jimin he loves the most.
💛💜
°~☆~°
*He told us in his Vlives, he told us in his album, he told us in his interviews. It was a hard, hard time for him.
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Now I cant stop thinking about when Ghost eventually brings Soap over for dinner:
Gf all dolled up, looking at him all pretty, greeting him with the sweetest smile and he can’t stop his mind from wandering to the filthy pictures he has seen of you.
She cooked up something really good (babbling something about keeping her boys strong and healthy, she likes them well fed), it's A5 Wagyu steak (the best cut the butcher had to offer) obviously payed with Ghost's money. He rarely splurges on himself but when it comes to his gf and Soap he doesn’t hold back.
The dinner can go two ways:
1.Lovie seated next to Soap, across from him Ghost. Halfway through his steak he notices a slight touch to his knee, but he brushes it off not acknowledging it further. When that touch gets firmer and starts to wander up his thigh he definitely notices. His body shudders and he almost chokes on the food in his mouth (much to Ghost's enjoyment), his eyes fall on you shooting him a lazy smile and oh my god are your eyes seductive like in the pics.
2.You sitting next to Ghost with Soap across from him. Both men engaged in a conversation about their last Op. When you play the oldest trick written in the books: oops I dropped my fork let me get it from under the table. It helps that Soap is still not fully used to Ghost's unmasked face, so he doesn’t notice you diving under the table. What he does notice is something heavy on his thigh and two hands ghosting over his belt buckle. He visibly jumps a little, his gaze falling into his lap, where you look up at him all doe-eyed, head resting on his right leg, waiting for permission.
In either scenario, a gruff voice brings Soap to snap his eyes back up holding eye-contact with his Lieutenant(who’s completely ignoring your antics):
"Enjoying yourself, Sergeant?"
Anyway it ends with cream pie for dessert <3
(Please tell me off, if i ever cross your boundaries or make you feel uncomfortable it’s the last thing i want to do when sending in nasty thoughts)
you're very sweet to check in about my boundaries!!! don't worry though - as long as the comments aren't aimed towards me (which maybe would be a bit off putting) and they're just related to stuff I'm writing ahah, I don't really care. I probably should think about and then clarify if I have any boundaries on my pinned post, but rn you're totally good!
(nsfw below)
Oh my god that last option has my brain melting out of my ears. Especially if Soap's still half-unsure if they're fucking with him or not, or if this is a one time thing that they're including him on. He obviously doesn't want to blow his only shot if this is the only time he'll ever get to fuck you.
Also there's something so surreal to him about you being on your knees in front of him after he's been literally jerked off in the middle of the desert by the man sitting across the table from him. To photos of you. In any other circumstance, if Soap had met you first and this was just a dinner between the two of you, he wouldn't be half as nervous; he'd be so comfortable and needy while you fit his length down your throat, palming the back of your head and maybe trying to fit more than you can manage before backing off and apologizing 😔
With Ghost sitting there though, just staring at him (and Soap has a fairly good understanding of Ghost as a person, but even he has trouble really getting a read on the guy), he's not sure if he should just sit there motionlessly as you undo his jeans and pull his dick out or if he should touch you. He can't stop looking from your face pressed up against the bulge in his briefs back to Ghost's (no mask now that they're at home away from everyone, but his real face is so much more intimidating somehow in this context).
Ghost at one point going, "Not gonna thank her for all her hard work?" and Soap can only whine and pat the back of your head shakily after coming down your throat, your lips still a bit wet with him when you pull away.
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my boyfriend's boyfriend
jamie drysdale x fem reader ft. trevor zegras
requested by @corneliaskates: "okay in light of these photos… I’m making you write jamie for me what about like moving in with him but like moving in with him also means moving in with trevor and… chaos ensues"
wc: 2.3k
warnings: blood in the context of undercooked food and also minor injury, reference to Jamie's shoulder injury and doctors offices, swearing, mention of drugs in a medical context, chaos, buffoonary
a/n: just some fun casual writing for a collection of scenes that i think you’d likely see upon moving into the zegras/drysdale household, pls enjoy the chaos! lots of this unhinged behavior we already knew about the 2 of them but a few details came from the recent "The Players Lounge" podcast episodes with jamie and trevor so go listen! (also would the homies wanna see me write for mason mctavish cause i really would love to do so)
Jamie stares blankly at the doctor as he continues to come to. He doesn’t hear the inquisition the doctor made. The first thought on his mind is the only thought he's had since he skated off the ice, his left shoulder in a dead hang: his season is over, there’s no way around it.
“Mr. Drysdale?” The physician tries to get Jamie’s attention.
“Yes, umm I’ll be there to help him. I’ve taken time off work.” Jamie turns his head slowly to look at you. He barely registers what you’ve said. He almost wants to ask you to repeat it but he knows he heard you right. The doctor shifts toward you, flipping through the aftercare instructions and various medications Jamie will have to take. You’re collected, attentive, and receptive all the while Jamie’s eyes bore into your profile, trying to understand. He’s still drowning in self-wallowing and frustration and now is trying to parse through the funny sort of feeling in his heart watching you prepare yourself to be a part time caretaker for him. Not only are you here right now, you’ve just admitted out loud, without any previous discussion between the two of you that you are not just willing but going to help him during his recovery?? He feels an intensity to communicate his love and appreciation for you that he’s not used to but ends up manifesting as,
“Will you move in with me?” The door to the exam room has just barely clicked shut from the doctor’s exit. Your spine is rod straight now from where you were previously collecting your purse and coat. Jamie’s always been a fiddler, twitching and messing with loose skin on his finger or the belt loop of your jeans, but now he sits perfectly still as he stares at you.
“Where’s the big red button, I think they gave you too much of something bud.” Humor always serves as a great deflection tactic for you but Jamie won’t let you off the hook.
“No no, I’m serious. Do you want to move in with me?” Your expression remains slightly standoffish as you draw closer to the bed. As you prop yourself on the hospital bed, you notice his eyes are inviting, stoic: a safe place to land. Lazy fingers reach to soothe Jamie’s uninjured arm.
“Would you have asked me if you hadn’t torn your shoulder?” Jamie’s nod is emphatic.
“Yes, it probably just would’ve taken me a bit longer to ask. You still make me nervous-- but like in a good way, in a good way.” Jamie stumbling over his words endears you like nothing else. “I kind of hate being without you, not in a weird codependent way, I just really like who I am when you’re around.”
Your mind is already made up after Jamie’s unbridled honesty but you still have to ask,
“Shouldn’t you run this by Trev first maybe?” He is a member of the household, though not much of a contributing one. To sell his conviction, Jamie’s eyes don’t leave yours as he reaches for his phone in the back pocket of the jeans he thinks he’s wearing. He gets an awful fright meeting bare skin under the hospital gown. Creasing at the waist with laughter doesn’t hinder you too much as you dig for his phone in your purse. He takes it sheepishly from your grasp. As he dials Trevor’s number, you urge him to put it on speaker phone.
“Jimmy! How high are you, man??”
“Z, Y/N’s gonna move in with us.”
“I thought she already lived here?”
—
Since the moment of Jamie’s injury you’ve been practically inseparable. Surgeon consultations, post op, helping him dress, cooking for him, you’ve truly been there for it all for Jamie. Now that he’s several months post op and regained most all of his range of motion, he’s been eager to pick up some slack.
“Are they closed?”
“Jamie my love, yes. I’ve literally had them closed every time you’ve asked in the last 15 minutes.” You sigh, patience thinning at both the frequent reminders and… well… how goddamn slow Jamie’s being. To pass the time, you’ve taken to concocting a game with the yellow spots on the inside of your closed eyelids.
“Dude it’s been fucking hours would you hurry up already?”
“Trevor, no one asked you.” Jamie snips at his childish best friend. It’s date night tonight and Jamie wanted to cook for you. Trevor decided, because he is cripplingly codependent, that he just had to sit on the living room couch to scroll Instagram. You’ve mentally taken the under on Trevor stealing some of your bread with olive oil within the first five minutes of it being in front of you because ‘Jimmy why didn’t you make any for me too?’
“Okay it's ready, you can open!” Slowly doing as you’re told to readjust to the well lit dining room, you catch Jamie scurrying around to his side of the table. His face holds an adorably pleased expression, you can tell he’s very proud of himself. The spread in front of you is barbequed steak, bread with olive oil, and a green salad; a shockingly balanced meal. A normally restless boy, Jamie vibrates with excitement even more now as he waits for your appraisal.
“Jamie baby, it looks amazing! Thank you!” Crows' feet emerge to compensate for his smile becoming impossibly wider, yet he’s still a bit shy, bashful after your praise.
“I’d hope so, it took you long enough Jimbo,” the peanut gallery croons again. You don’t even acknowledge Trevor as you begin to saw through your steak… until red liquid begins to pour out… Stunned and surprised, your mouth gapes for a moment, finding the gentlest way to put things.
“Jamie,” drawing out the final vowel, your eyes flick to his. His expression is eager with eyebrows raised in question.
“How long was this steak on the barbeque for?”
“Like 10 minutes I think? Why?” Jamie pales slightly at your question.
“I think the heat was too high babe.” Jamie observes his steak with a close eye and then oggles yours from across the table before reaching for his knife.
“What do you mean? You said it looks amazing, I mean look at those char marks!”
“Jamie baby, it's practically still moo’ing…” Trevor bursts out laughing, his stupid wheeze accompanying Jamie’s panic. As his knife breaches the admittedly lovely crust, bloody liquid pours out of Jamie’s steak as well. The color of his cheeks grows to match that of what's on his plate. Jamie starts to say something but it’s Trevor’s voice you both hear instead.
“Just put it in the microwave.”
—
The team returned last night from the East coast road trip. You and Jamie have been in denial about Trevor’s return, trying to stretch out the silence with a lazy day on the couch. Trevor however has had other plans.
“Why do I have the least blanket right now? I’m literally the tallest of us three.”
“Because no one invited you to join?” You shove at Trevor’s toes that are digging into your thigh from how you’re sardine-d on the couch. He whines as you do so, pushing at you back. Harder. “Ow Trevor stop!”
“What I’m not fucking doing anything!”
“Guys! I can’t hear what they’re saying!” Jamie bursts, effectively shutting you both up. Trevor glares at you as you snuggle further into Jamie’s chest, Jamie's arm visibly tightening around you. The face you give Trevor is smug.
“Fine, I’ll just go somewhere else then.” As he stands from the couch he makes an equally childish display of flipping the blanket up and over your head, messing up your hair and covering your eyes.
Jamie coos quietly at you not to say anything or react so you remain calm and settle in to watch the rest of the current episode of Yellowstone with your boyfriend.
A few minutes later when there is a distinct cacophony of falling caps, banging metal doors, and at least a liter container of liquid (hopefully closed) hitting the floor, it’s not hard to tell Trevor has decided to do his laundry. He comes back upstairs acting as if nothing was afoot.
It’s not until an hour later when Trevor has made the switch to the dryer that you notice something actually might be off. Wafting up from downstairs is a distinct smell of burning. You pause to be sure your nose isn’t confusing something else before voicing your worry.
“Do you smell that?” Jamie sniffs violently enough to be audible.
“What are you– oh shit!” Jamie moves from behind your back leaving you flopping onto yours from his quickness. “Trevor!!” He shouts while bounding down the stairs. “I told you, you have to clean the lint trap every single time you use the dryer!” His voice grows inaudible the farther downstairs he gets. Trevor peeks his head out from his room.
“Was he talking to me?” You can’t help but laugh, hands covering your face in disbelief.
“Why are we friends with you?”
“I’m fucking awesome, duh.”
—
“Okay don’t panic–” Is all you hear before you start to panic. “But umm Z might’ve slipped on the roof…”
“Tell me you’re joking. Why are you calling me? Oh my god Jamie, call the trainer or something! Is he hurt?” It’s brisk in the shade where you stepped out of your office to answer the incessant calls from your boyfriend. You’re still not off for another hour.
“I think he’s okay. Definitely tore open his leg but we put some stuff on it. He’s still complaining about it but you know him, he’s always complaining about something so I think he’s okay.” As Jamie finishes, your phone vibrates with a text. “I sent you a picture of it.” The picture reveals a shallow cut about 6 inches long down the front of Trevor’s calf. There’s still remnants of blood around the cut itself and more notably about 12 normal sized bandaids placed like a patchwork quilt over the area of interest. Idiots. “We didn’t wanna get in trouble with the team…” Jamie says softly, decidedly embarrassed.
“I see. Okay well great job with the band aids you guys. I’ll pick some more up on the way home and some other supplies. Why were you up there?”
“I was playing guitar and Trevor came up to tell me he could do it better and then promptly took it from me.” There’s a pouty lilt to Jamie’s voice that makes you wonder if Trevor’s really the one that got hurt.
“Did he damage your guitar Jim Jam?” A shiver rakes your body as you’re desperate to get back inside the office.
“No, thank god.” He’s quiet, waiting for your reply.
“You’re doing great Jamie, it’s really coming along baby.” He chirps a thank you, easily excited by your dismissal of Trevor’s insult. The two of you say your goodbye’s over Trevor’s whining in the background.
On your way home, as promised, you stop at a drugstore to grab some gauze and larger wraps for Trevor’s ‘injury.’ You send a snarky picture of two contending boxes of Band Aids side by side to Trevor. Your caption ‘Mandalorian or Tangled?’ Something tells you Trevor’s reply is completely serious when your phone lights up with ‘Flynn Rider.’
—
Jamie slips into your shared bathroom as you’re fanning gently at your face. He smiles kindly but doesn’t start a conversation. Instead he reaches for his toothbrush and sets to brushing his teeth. The two of you don’t normally get ready for bed together at the exact same time. Typically one of you is asleep on the couch and being prodded at by the other to come to bed. Well, you normally prod at Jamie while he normally gallantly carries you to bed without disturbing your sleep. As he brushes his teeth, Jamie observes you as his entertainment. He steadies himself with a hip popped against the counter and one foot crossed in front of the other.
Jamie’s attention does not bother you. Being the type not to speak until prompted, Jamie’s stays silent, his watchful gaze comforting if anything. That is until his lips form a small smile around his toothbrush that begins to grow. Finally you flick your eyes over to him in the mirror and notice toothpaste beginning to trickle down his chin. A drop that was lingering ominously begins to fall so you lurch forward to catch it in the palm of your hand, not wanting to risk the white carpet square Jamie’s standing on.
“If you keep smiling like that you’re gonna get toothpaste on yourself Jamie. Be careful.” The toothpaste in your palm is flicked into the sink before you promptly rinse your hand. Jamie heeds your warning, deciding it's time for him to rinse as well. After his hands are towel dried he moves to hug you from behind. The smile is still on his face.
“Seriously, what are you smiling about, mister?” A giggle escapes your chest. You feel Jamie’s shrug against your back as you dig for another product in the drawer next to you.
“Dunno, I’m just so happy you’re here.” Around you, Jamie’s never shied away from honesty and it’s something you’ve always appreciated. The last few months living with Jamie and Trevor has been chaos, hell at times, and insanely stressful but you’ve still found joy in every moment. So you meet Jamie’s honesty with some of your own when you say,
“There’s no place I’d rather be.”
Later, when the two of you find yourselves curled around each other in bed, under an excessive number of blankets, it’s like Trevor has ESP for when he’s being left out of affections. A knock on the conjoining wall confirms this theory. His voice is muffled but you can still make it out.
“I love you guys.” Jamie chuckles and kisses your forehead, shaking with laughter of your own.
“We love you too Trevor.”
#jamie drysdale#jamie drysdale x reader#jamie drysdale imagine#trevor zegras#trevor zegras imagine#anaheim ducks#nhl imagine#hockey imagine#ducks hockey#my writing
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