#still trying to catch up on posting these here

[thepitlanepress]

BREAK DOWN –

↳ oscar piastri + gf!reader

⌗ :: masterlist

⌗ :: a/n: coming out of the aus gp with no will to live and an idea for a fic is probably the worst thing ever but here we are...

oscar was devastated.

you knew it, from the moment he spun out of the race, you knew he was crushed. his words on the radio were filled with so much sadness and you had to fight the urge to run out of the garage and hug him as soon as he finished.

you could see it in the way he got out of the car, you could see it in the way he held himself during interviews, you could see it in the way he was walking.

you had always been able to read oscar like a book, and it was moments like these when you were grateful you were so fluent in him. because you can see his hurt and the disappointment coursing through him. he puts on a brave face that falters every so often and fans catch onto that but you can see past it.

it crushes your soul when you watch the post race interview through a screen tucked away in a corner of his drivers room. you so badly want to comfort him, to assure him everything will be okay.

when he does walk through the door, he's quiet and hard cleaning up his things and ignoring you, sitting down and just resting there in silence. you don't take it personally though, and wait for him to let you in.

after about half an hour of quiet he shuffles over and offers you his hand, you take it, instantly offering support in whatever way you can, gently rubbing your thumb over the back of his hand.

you sit like that for a long while you playing gently with his hand while he holds onto your tightly, staying in the private bubble of his drivers room, politely declining all of the people who stop by trying to talk to him.

and eventually when its time to go home, he stands in silence, still gripping your hand as if its the only thing tethering him to earth. you walk out of the paddock together ignoring the reporters and cameras shoved in your faces with you leading the way back to your car.

he's silent all the way back home, not saying anything but still holding onto your hand. its the only thing that tells you that he's still here with you- that he still wants you with him.

you walk into the apartment together, dropping your bags on the kitchen counter and watching as he lets go of your hand and makes his way into the bedroom, you hear shuffling for a bit and then the shower starts running.

deciding to keep yourself busy while he's in there you walk over to the couch and flick through some of his favourite shows, settling on one and pressing pause as you wait for him to emerge from the shower.

oscar's soft footsteps announce his arrival and when you look up you can see the last cracks in his amor shatter. he collapses into your arms sobbing violently, his body wracked with tremors as he loses his composure.

your arms instantly come around him wrapping him and a fierce hug and rubbing his back trying to soothe him in anyway you can.

his tears break your heart clean open and he tightly wraps his arms around you, refusing to let go. you gently run your hands through his hand pressing kisses to his head and whispering soft assurances in his ear.

"its my fault," he says through cries. "i fucked over the win."

"shhh," you whisper into his hair. "it's okay, its okay, its okay."

"i could've won. i could've won and i fucked myself over. i'm so worthless, whats the point if i can't even keep myself from spinning out?"

"you listen to me oscar piastri," you say your voice soft but fierce. "you are not worthless, and it was not your fault, it was the weather the track was wet you hit the gravel and you accidentally spun out. you are so talented. you wouldn't be here if you weren't."

"i should've anticipated the wet track though, i should've been better," he says into your lap.

"you forget how amazing you are baby," you say quietly pressing another kiss to his head and playing with his hair, "you are so extremely talented, i wish you could see that."

you fall back into silence after that, the only sound filling the apartment is oscar's quiet sobs and your murmurs as you calm him down.

soon he stops crying his body no longer shaking with sobs and tears no longer falling down his face. he still has a death grip on you and he nestles in closer to you, sighing softly when he registers your hands running though his hair.

you stay together like that for half of the night. and no matter how many nights over time that end up like this - not that you hoped these types of days happened ever again - you would stick by oscar's side.

for all the times he felt crushed, you would be there to build him back up, you would be there for the days he felt like shit, you would be there for all of it.

especially when he won.

because oscar was worth it.

[deadrobinthoughts]

† love me anyway : various.

⋆˙⟡ "Love me in the quiet, in the chaos, in the ruin. Love me when I am sharp edges and storm-torn hands. Love me not for what I could be, but for what I am and if I break, love me still".

⋆˙⟡ request: not a request - just something from a notebook. ⋆˙⟡ featuring: dick grayson, jason todd, tim drake, damian wayne, cassandra cain, bruce wayne, clark kent, kon-el ↦ kalico note: it's the fact i am nervous to even post. i may take a break from posting anything big for a while, i apologize everyone.

⋆˙⟡ 𝐓𝐢𝐦 𝐃𝐫𝐚𝐤𝐞

the room feels smaller now, heavy and tight, as if the walls are inching closer every second you stand there in silence. tim hasn’t looked up from the floor since it began, his fingers curled into loose fists at his sides, tension visible in his frame like he’s fighting a battle you can’t see. it’s quiet - too quiet - broken only by the faint hum of traffic through the walls, the muffled life of the city that hates you both doing nothing for the darkening mood.

you shift on your feet, swallowing hard, chest tight with something bitter and heavy. “tim,” you whisper; it’s soft, cracked, because you don’t even know how to start, how to make this feel right again. his gaze flickers to yours, exhaustion etched deep in every shadow of his face, his eyes haunted by the kind of doubt that eats someone alive from the inside out. you feel your throat tighten, struggling against the burning in your jaw, the way every word catches, jagged and painful.

“i don’t know what you expect from me,” you finally whisper, voice tight and strained with emotion. it hurts to say, like pulling glass from your chest, like exposing every wound, every hurt, every insecurity you’ve both tried so hard to keep hidden beneath the surface. “i don’t know how to fix this, tim. i don’t.. i don’t know how to make you believe that you’re enough, you pull away more and more every time i try. and i-” your voice cracks, sharp and sudden, shattering against the quiet. “i don’t know what you want.”

tim’s expression doesn’t shift, but something in his eyes flickers; a flash of hurt, brief but intense enough to sting. he swallows, fingers flexing at his sides, knuckles white with restraint as he fights to keep himself still and composed. but the pain is there; it bleeds through in every line of his face, in every shaky exhale, in the unsteady rise and fall of his chest beneath his thin, worn t-shirt.

“love me anyway,” he says suddenly, his voice rough and low, barely above a whisper. it feels loud, echoing through the room, through your chest, through every fiber of your being. he lifts his head, meeting your eyes, and the way he looks at you nearly tears you apart. it’s desperate and vulnerable in ways tim so rarely lets himself be. “even if you don’t know how. even if i don’t deserve it- even if you think it’s pointless. even if you’re tired. even if it’s hard. i know, i forget to be present, i have days when i'm barely here at all and i know.. i know ive heard you say you need and i..” he swallows roughly, jaw tightening as he forces out the words. “just love me anyway.”

and something inside you splinters, crumbling beneath the weight of his plea. you’re frozen, rooted to the spot with an aching in your chest from how how wounded he sounds. you want to reach for him, to close the distance, to promise him every impossible thing he’s asking for but your voice dies in your throat, caught in the crushing realization that he’d ever doubted it at all.

tim looks away, the silence returning heavier than before, swallowing the fragile moment whole. “i think… we need a break,” he says quietly, his voice barely audible now. it’s like he’s conceding defeat, like he’s finally admitting to himself - and to you - that maybe neither of you can keep pushing through walls that neither knows how to break down.

and you realize, standing there in the silence, heart heavy with the echo of words you can’t unsay, that loving someone doesn’t always mean you know how to save them. sometimes, love isn’t enough to bridge every gap. sometimes, it just means watching helplessly as they disappear behind walls neither of you built but both of you suffer behind.

┈┈・୨ ✦ ୧・┈┈

⋆˙⟡ 𝐃𝐢𝐜𝐤 𝐆𝐫𝐚𝐲𝐬𝐨𝐧

the apartment feels too small, too still, as if the silence is pressing down on you, wrapping around your throat and squeezing until you’re breathless. dick stands across from you, still soaked from the rain, his jacket clinging heavily to his shoulders, a silent testament to the urgency that drove him here. his chest heaves slightly with uneven breaths, shoulders rising and falling beneath damp leather and the faint chill that clings to his skin. he doesn’t say anything, but his eyes - god, his eyes say enough, shadowed and exhausted, pleading with you to understand something he can’t quite put into words.

your chest aches with the weight of everything you’ve left unsaid, weeks of holding back finally fraying at the edges, spilling out in a voice that trembles despite your best effort to hold it steady; “i don’t know what you wanted me to do, dick. i don’t know what you expect from me!”

he visibly flinches at the rawness in your words, like each one lands sharper than the last, forcing him to finally look you in the eye. his jaw tenses, his shoulders drawing up defensively, and then something snaps in him, a fragile thread he's been clinging to finally giving way.

“love me anyway!” he shouts, voice cracking halfway through, rough and desperate, filled with the ache of a man who’s always been strong. a man that's always held the weight of everyone else’s world but never learned how to build his own. his hands curl into fists at his sides, knuckles white, his expression a mix of anger and pain. “that’s all i ever wanted! i screw up, i know. i run, i get in trouble, i - i never stop, and i hate that i do that to you.” his voice drops, quieter but no less intense, eyes burning with unshed tears. “i know it’s not fair. but goddammit.. love me anyway.”

your throat tightens, every second of silence after his plea stretching painfully between you. the vulnerability on his face hurts worse than any wound, cuts deeper than any fight you've ever had. you’ve always loved him through everything, even when it hurt, even when he pushed you away but this feels different.

something vital is hanging in the balance.

you’re still, your heartbeat a dull ache against your ribs, hands trembling as you force yourself to speak, voice hoarse and barely audible. “i think...i think we need a break.”

the words settle like lead between you, heavy and irreversible. dick steps back as if you've struck him, his expression shifting from desperate to blank in the blink of an eye, the shock and pain flickering briefly across his face before fading into a hollow resignation. you can feel the space opening wider, see the way he begins closing off, like the words themselves have forced distance he doesn’t want but somehow expected.

he doesn’t respond right away, just looks away from you, breathing deeply, and you wonder - achingly, hopelessly - if this is the moment everything finally breaks for good.

┈┈・୨ ✦ ୧・┈┈

⋆˙⟡ 𝐃𝐚𝐦𝐢𝐚𝐧 𝐖𝐚𝐲𝐧𝐞

the fight burns in a slow, devastating silence before either of you speaks a word, and it's almost worse this way because silence means damian is thinking, analyzing, preparing. he's pulling away, stepping backward, eyes dark, focused and distant, like he's already starting to construct walls. preparing to shut you out. his posture is painfully rigid, a soldier at attention, a prince too proud to bend, to break - even in front of you.

you can’t handle it. not tonight. not when the air feels charged like a storm. electric and impossibly heavy with the weight of unspoken hurt. you step forward, swallowing back the lump in your throat, forcing words past trembling lips because he needs to understand.

"i don't know what you expect from me, damian," you say, voice soft but threaded with frustration; with an exhaustion you've been carrying far too long. "i don't.. i don't know what else you want me to do."

he lifts his gaze sharply, eyes narrowing, brows furrowing in an instant. but there's something beneath the anger - a brief flash of vulnerability, a crack in the carefully constructed armor that damian has worn from the moment you first met.

"love me anyway," he finally snaps, voice sharp but laced with something deeply wounded, something young and aching and desperately trying not to break. "is that so impossible for you?"

there's the truth of it; the fragile heart beneath the fierce exterior, the boy who still expects rejection, who still braces for it every time love is offered, every time tenderness is shown. your heart shatters because, beneath everything, damian still believes he's unworthy. he still believes he has to earn your love, to prove himself, to constantly fight for something he fears will slip from his fingers at any second.

"damian.." you begin gently, stepping toward him, wanting to reach out but hesitating because he looks so guarded, so closed off. "i do love you. you know that."

he shakes his head sharply, lips pressed into a tight, thin line. "not enough to accept me. not enough to trust that i want you exactly as you are - that i do not need you to change." his voice cracks just slightly, barely perceptible, but you feel it deep down in your bones. "if you can't - if you won't - i believe.. perhaps, we need a break."

the words freeze your blood. damian never retreats, never surrenders - not to anyone, not even you. yet here he stands, voice unsteady and broken, telling you that he'd rather let you go than endure the pain of not being enough. you stare at him, throat burning, eyes stinging with unshed tears because you see it clearly now; the careful defenses, the self-inflicted punishment he believes he deserves.

"i don't want a break," you whisper, heart beginning to ache. "i just want you. i just-"

he inhales sharply, gaze suddenly intense, eyes bright with a pain he's been holding back for far too long. "then prove it," he says softly, desperately. "because right now.. right now, i do not know how to believe you."

┈┈・୨ ✦ ୧・┈┈

⋆˙⟡ 𝐉𝐚𝐬𝐨𝐧 𝐓𝐨𝐝𝐝

the air in the apartment feels suffocating, thick with unspoken words and tension that coils around your lungs until every breath feels like swallowing razor blades. jason stands near the window, silhouetted against the dim glow of the streetlights below, his back turned to you as though he can't bear to face what's happening head-on.

he’s painfully still, shoulders rigid beneath his worn leather jacket, fists clenched tightly at his sides. you can practically feel the barely contained storm radiating off him; the anger, the frustration, the quiet, desperate hurt that's been building for far too long.

your voice finally breaks the silence, quiet and strained, exhaustion pulling at every syllable. "i don't know what you expect me to do anymore, jason.." your voice cracks under the weight of honesty, frustration, and helplessness. "i keep trying, but.. nothing changes. you won't let me help and you won't let me in. what am i supposed to do? tell me what to do."

jason turns sharply, the motion quick and sudden, like your words have sliced through whatever fragile restraint he had left. his eyes are burning, fierce with anger but deeper still with hurt that he's tried so hard to bury beneath layers of bitterness, control, and sarcasm. his jaw tightens, muscles twitching as he tries to keep steady, and when he finally speaks, his voice is rough, low, breaking under the strain of what he's feeling.

"love me anyway," he snaps, almost desperately, the words shattering like glass between you. his eyes burn into yours, fierce yet wounded, daring you to deny him, challenging you to turn your back; to prove every fear he's ever had right.

"even if i'm fucked up. even if you hate the way i push you away. even if i don't deserve it.. even if it's impossible to keep dealing with me, just-" he falters, breathing sharply through clenched teeth, eyes glistening, more vulnerable than you've ever seen. "just love me anyway. you're supposed to-"

your chest feels like it's caving in, his words echoing sharply inside your ribcage, leaving bruises no one else could see. you want to reach out, to hold him, but you feel paralyzed, stuck between your own hurt and his pain. jason swallows hard, looking away now, eyes darkening as something closes off inside him again, shielding that fleeting vulnerability behind thick walls once more.

after a heavy pause, his voice returns, quieter now, hollowed out by acceptance. "we should take a break," he says, sharp, not meeting your gaze. his eyes fix on the floor, shoulders tense, as if bracing himself against your response, against the hurt he's sure will follow. you stare at him, the ache spreading slowly through your bones, settling into your marrow. neither of you moves, the words hanging heavy and bitter between you, and for a moment, all that's left is silence, stretched unbearably thin.

because loving jason todd has always been complicated; beautiful, painful, chaotic, deep - but you realize, for the first time, that maybe love isn't always enough to save someone who won't let you in. even if you want to love him anyway.

┈┈・୨ ✦ ୧・┈┈

⋆˙⟡ 𝐂𝐚𝐬𝐬𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐫𝐚 𝐂𝐚𝐢𝐧

cass stands quietly, the air around her tense, as if the world itself has paused to listen. her eyes remain fixed on the floor between you, shadows dancing across her features beneath the dim lighting of the training room. you've always been able to read her, even without words, but now the silence feels suffocating rather than comforting. it hangs in the space, heavier with every breath she doesn't take, every move she doesn't make, every heartbeat that feels painfully slow. she's never been good with words, and yet you both know something needs to be said.

"i don't know what you expect from me, cass," you finally say, your voice strained under the weight of exhaustion and frustration, a quiet desperation settling into your bones. "i can't guess what you're thinking or feeling all the time, and it's starting to feel like… like it's not enough. like i'm not enough."

cassandra flinches subtly, her eyes wide and dark, flickering with emotions she struggles to name but you see clearly: confusion, hurt, fear. her fingers twitch restlessly at her sides while she desperately tries to find the words to fix it all. then, uncharacteristically, she takes a careful step forward, eyes locked on yours, silently pleading for you to understand her, to hear what she can't say.

"love me anyway," she whispers, her voice shaking softly, like each word costs her something she can't afford to lose. her gaze searches yours, the quiet tremble in her voice revealing more than she's ever willingly shown. "please…just love me anyway."

you can feel your heart fracturing at the quiet, pleading desperation in her voice. because you do, you love her so fiercely it aches, but it's not enough, not right now, not with this distance growing between you, leaving you both feeling lost and uncertain; distant despite standing mere inches apart. your eyes blur with tears you fight to hold back as you take a slow, shaky breath and whisper words that you know will break you both.

"i think…i think we need a break, cass."

she freezes, shoulders stiffening, the vulnerability in her eyes turning to open, stark panic. cassandra doesn't speak, doesn't make a sound, but her expression says everything she can't. for the first time, you've genuinely shaken her, genuinely hurt her, and the knowledge makes you sick.

she doesn't cry, doesn't shout, but she looks at you as though you've taken something vital away from her, leaving her unsteady, lost.

and yet, even in this silence, even in this hurt, you both know it isn't an end. it feels more like a desperate attempt at preserving what's left, at giving yourselves time to breathe, to heal, to find your way back through the fractures that have grown between you. and as cassie slowly draws herself up, taking a breath that's a little too shaky, a little too unsteady, you wonder if the space will heal or widen the cracks you've already made.

┈┈・୨ ✦ ୧・┈┈

⋆˙⟡ 𝐁𝐫𝐮𝐜𝐞 𝐖𝐚𝐲𝐧𝐞

the air is heavy, tense with the kind of silence only bruce can summon. he stands there, halfway turned away from you, his profile sharp against the pale glow of the batcomputer. his posture is rigid, shoulders tense beneath the thick fabric of his suit, and you can see the way his jaw is clenched. everything between you is raw, an open wound you've both pretended wasn't there, but now the illusion has shattered completely.

"i don’t know what else you expect me to do," you finally say, your voice softer than you intended, heavy with exhaustion. you've carried this burden for so long; loving him, accepting the shadows, the secrets, the distance. you've given all you could, pouring your heart into a man who always seems just out of reach, a shadow slipping between your fingers. "i've done everything, bruce. i've tried to be everything. i've tried to be what you need, what gotham lets you have."

bruce turns then, slow and deliberate, fixing you with a look that makes your heart ache. his eyes are dark, guarded, but beneath that practiced stoicism is a flicker of hurt, a quiet desperation that few ever get to see. "you love me when it's easy," he mumbles, voice rough as sandpaper, each word heavy with accusation. "you love me when it doesn’t hurt. but this-" he gestures toward the cavern around you, to the shadows lingering in every corner, the endless responsibilities of a city that never sleeps- "this was never going to be easy. not for me. not for us."

"you've never made it easy, bruce. not once. but i've always stayed," you manage, feeling your voice break despite your best attempts to hold yourself together. your throat aching from the strain of holding back tears. you don't want to crumble now, not in front of him, not when every part of you feels exposed. "i just.. i just don't think i can do it anymore. i think.. we need a break."

his reaction is subtle, almost imperceptible. a flicker of his eyelids, a brief tightening of his lips, but to you, it feels like an earthquake. he's silent for a long, heavy moment, staring at you as if he's trying to decipher a code, trying to understand how he let it get this far. when he speaks, it's softer, lower, more vulnerable than you've ever heard him.

"is that what you really want?"

and god, it hurts. because you don't know how to answer. you're not even sure what you want anymore, what you can bear. you only know this ache, this constant, relentless hurt is tearing you apart. your silence seems to be answer enough and he takes a step toward you, his voice quiet yet impossibly heavy as he finally whispers:

"or just… love me anyway."

the words hit you with enough force that you're not sure if your knees will hold. your vision blurs with unshed tears, your chest painfully tight. you want to say you already do - you have, you always have - but the words won't come. instead, you stare at him, heartbroken, desperately wishing things were different, knowing nothing is ever simple with bruce wayne.

┈┈・୨ ✦ ୧・┈┈

⋆˙⟡ 𝐂𝐥𝐚𝐫𝐤 𝐊𝐞𝐧𝐭

the farmhouse is quiet, the soft hum of the wind outside making the silence between you and clark seem louder, heavier, as if every unspoken word had been bottled and finally shattered against the kitchen floor. he stands near the window, bathed in moonlight that makes him look both ethereal and distant, the set of his shoulders carrying the unbearable weight of too many lives; too many expectations. his head is bowed slightly, hands resting against the window ledge, grounding himself against the storm he feels coming. he hasn't looked at you yet, hasn't let you see the hurt he knows is reflected clear as day in his eyes, but you can feel it, radiating off of him in painful waves.

you draw a breath but it feels sharp, uneven, scraping against your ribs. your words come out quieter than intended, a whisper edged with frustration, exhaustion, and confusion. “i don’t know what you want from me anymore, clark. i don’t know what you expect me to do.”

he turns at that, expression tight with something that almost looks like desperation. it's rare - unsettlingly rare - to see him shaken, the unwavering calm he wears for the world fraying at the edges. his jaw is tense, muscles flexing as he pushes back an anger that's not truly meant for you, but for the crushing reality of what loving him means. "i need you to love me anyway," he says firmly, voice edged with raw honesty and aching vulnerability. "even if i can't always be here, even if i have to choose the world over us.. i need you to love me anyway."

your chest tightens painfully, heart squeezing in your chest at the stark truth laid bare between you. it feels like your throat is closing up, because you've always known. you've known that loving clark kent meant sharing him, not just with metropolis, but with the world. you'd accepted it willingly, openly, long ago. but now, standing here in the silence, the truth feels crushing. because sometimes you want selfishness. sometimes you want him to choose you first, even if it’s just this once.

your voice breaks quietly into the heavy silence, rough with the ache in your throat and the tears you’re barely holding back. "maybe…maybe we need a break then, clark."

the words hang there, still and final, and clark's expression shifts immediately. pain flashes openly across his face, unguarded and profound. he looks like you've struck him harder than kryptonite ever could, and you watch his fingers tighten against the windowsill, gripping it so hard you’re almost certain the wood will splinter beneath his touch. he takes a breath, slow and shaky, then looks away, nodding faintly in acceptance as if he'd somehow known this was coming but hoped desperately it wouldn't.

┈┈・୨ ✦ ୧・┈┈

⋆˙⟡ 𝐊𝐨𝐧

the headquarters feels too quiet, unbearably empty despite the distant murmur of voices in another room. kon stands with his back pressed against the kitchen counter, eyes cast down toward the cracked tile floor, brows furrowed in frustration. the tension between you is thick, stretched thin, like a rubber band about to snap. he's always so casual, so good at brushing things off, shrugging away the weight of the world with an easy smile and a cocky tilt of his sunglasses. but now? that armor has slipped away, leaving something broken and hurt exposed beneath.

you can see it in the hard line of his jaw, the way his shoulders are pulled tight, the bitter edge to his usually carefree expression. kon doesn't show vulnerability easily; he hides behind bravado, sarcasm, and a careful mask of arrogance. but tonight, there's none of that. tonight, he's just standing there, wounded and open, looking at you like he's waiting for something, anything to make sense of the fracture between you.

"i don't know what you expect from me, kon," you finally say, voice trembling but steady, the hurt and exhaustion plain in every quiet syllable. "you're always pushing me away, but then you look at me like i’m the one leaving. what do you want me to do?"

his eyes flash sharply behind his sunglasses and in one swift movement, he pulls them away, dropping them carelessly onto the counter. his gaze is intense, open, painfully honest in a way that steals your breath away. there's a rawness there you've never seen from him, as if something inside him is breaking apart and he's desperately trying to hold it together.

"love me anyway," he says fiercely, voice hoarse and tight by the force of his own emotions. "that's it. that's all i've ever wanted. from anyone. i know- i know i'm a mess, alright? i know i don't always make it easy, but i just- i need you to love me anyway."

your heart twists painfully in your chest, because you've always known. you’ve known that kon’s cocky grin and fearless bravado mask something deeper. you've always loved him through it all, every sharp edge and every hidden hurt. but tonight, standing across from him, you finally understand that love alone isn't enough to fix what's broken between you.

not when he won't let you.

"maybe…" you whisper softly, the ache pressing sharply against your throat, heavy and painful, "maybe we just need a break."

he freezes, breath catching painfully, and you watch the quiet devastation spread slowly across his features, shattering whatever confidence had managed to remain. he opens his mouth as if to say something, then stops, swallowing thickly before looking away.

you stand silently in the hollow aftermath, wishing desperately it didn’t feel so final, watching as kon struggles to piece together a response, realizing too late that words aren’t always enough; especially when they're the wrong ones.

[kathlare]

hii i love ur fics so much honestly ur writing is amazing. i was just wondering if u could write like a present day smuttier fic w lando and amelie like after the Oscars or after one of her shows or something xx :)

Hii!! First of all, thank you so much for your kind words, it means a lot 🫶🥹 And of course, thank you for the request! I loved the idea, so here’s what you asked for — a little present-day, post-concert Lando and Amelie moment 😏✨ I hope you enjoy it! Let me know what you think 💕

the stage between us

Lando Norris x Amelie Dayman

Summary: Amelie delivers a sultry performance that takes an unexpected turn when Lando steps in to replace her usual dancer.

Wordcount: 4.6 k

Warnings: smut

full masterlist // request over here!

March 9th, 2025 - London, United Kingdom

Amelie stepped off the stage, the sound of her heels clicking against the O2 Arena's floor as she made her way toward the side. Her heart was still pounding from the last few moments of the show, and she could already hear the faint buzz of anticipation in the air. It was only hours before showtime, and the final touches were being done on soundcheck.

She turned her head, catching sight of Lando, who was perched on the stands, chatting with some members of her crew. She smiled to herself—he looked so out of place in his casual hoodie and jeans, but he was still unmistakably Lando.

She grabbed a water bottle and took a sip, her eyes never leaving him. She loved watching him interact with everyone—he was easygoing, charming, and always managed to make people laugh. But what really made her heart flutter was the way he looked at her when he didn’t think anyone was paying attention.

—How’s my favorite race car driver doing up there?— Amelie called to him, leaning against the sound booth, arms crossed over her chest.

Lando looked down, his lips curling into that lazy smile of his. —You know, just trying to survive the madness.— He waved to a couple of people before making his way down the stands, his eyes never leaving hers.

—You’ve been with here before. Surely, the madness can’t be that bad.—

He rolled his eyes but smiled as he reached her, slipping an arm around her waist and pulling her into a quick, lingering kiss. —It’s still tiring, baby, but I’ll survive if it means I get to see you perform every night.—

Amelie smiled, feeling that familiar warmth spread through her at his words. She leaned into him, resting her head on his shoulder as they stood there for a moment, enjoying the quiet before the chaos of the show. It was rare for them to get these little moments, and she was savoring every second of it.

—You’re lucky I’m such a great performer, huh?— she teased, nudging him playfully.

Lando laughed, his hand sliding down to her lower back as he looked down at her. —No, you’re lucky I’m such a great boyfriend. You couldn’t do this without me.—

Amelie tilted her head up, giving him a mischievous look. —Oh, really? I think I’m doing just fine without you, Lan.—

He raised an eyebrow, giving her a mock glare. —You’re lucky I’m too tired to argue right now.—

—Mm, yeah, well, lucky for you, I’m feeling generous.— She smiled up at him before planting a soft kiss on his lips.

Lando grinned, his hand gently squeezing her waist. —Generous, huh? Well, I’ll take it.—

But just as the moment seemed to settle into a peaceful lull, Amelie felt the nagging pull of reality. Tonight was their last night together before he had to fly out to Australia. She had known this for a while, but it still felt like a punch to the gut. Their time together had been so full, and she couldn’t bear the thought of spending even a few days apart, especially with everything they’d been through.

She broke the kiss, pulling away from him just enough to meet his gaze. Her expression softened as she spoke.

—Lan, can you do something for me?— she asked, her voice a little quieter than usual.

Lando glanced down at her, sensing the shift in her tone. —Of course. What’s up?—

Amelie hesitated for a moment, her fingers nervously fiddling with the hem of her shirt. —So... you know the bed chem outro, right?— she asked, her words slightly rushed, like she wasn’t sure how he would react.

Lando raised an eyebrow, clearly confused. —The bed chem outro?— He repeated slowly, looking at her with a slight frown. —You want me to... what, exactly?—

Amelie bit her lip, trying to hide the grin threatening to break through. —You know, the part of the show where Peter comes in with a camcorder, and we move behind the curtains for a more... private moment?—

Lando’s eyes widened, and he shook his head with a chuckle. —No fucking way. Not happening, Ames. I’m not doing that, not tonight.—

Amelie pouted, her bottom lip sticking out in a way that made Lando’s heart skip a beat. She crossed her arms, and for a moment, she just stared at him, an exaggerated look of offense spreading across her face.

—What do you mean, no fucking way?— she huffed, raising an eyebrow. —You're acting like it's such a big deal. It’s part of the damn show. Everyone knows it!—

—But… I don't know, Ames, it's just a bit… too much. You're, like, famous, and... fuck, people will be watching. I’ll be on the jumbotron, and I’ll look like I don’t know what I’m doing.— He winced just thinking about it.

Amelie rolled her eyes with an exaggerated sigh. —Fine, you win, I guess I’ll just have to do it alone. I’m sure I’ll manage just fine without you there to help me.— She turned to walk away, but before she could take a full step, she felt Lando’s arm pull her back gently.

—Wait, wait, wait.— His voice was softer, quieter. —Don’t... don't do that. You know I can’t say no to you when you look like that. Fine, I'll do it, but only because it’s our last night, and I’m... I'm not going to leave you hanging like that.—

—C’mon, we need to practice it during soundcheck,— she said, grabbing his hand and dragging him toward the stage.

—Practice?— Lando groaned. —You’re seriously gonna make me do this in front of your entire team?—

—Oh, don’t be shy now, Norris. I’ve seen you do the most ridiculous shit on Twitch for years. This is nothing.—

Lando narrowed his eyes at her. —That’s different. There’s no... implied...— he hesitated, struggling to find the words, —...sexual tension involved.—

Amelie snorted. —Oh, baby, you’re already oozing sexual tension. Trust me.—

Lando flushed a deep shade of red, and Amelie couldn’t help but laugh. God, she loved how easy he was to tease.

As they stepped onto the stage, her crew was already adjusting lighting and sound. Peter, her usual backup dancer, was off to the side, smirking knowingly as Lando reluctantly took his place.

—Peter, show him how it's done,— Amelie called, grinning.

Peter raised the camcorder and moved through the routine with ease, slipping behind the closing curtain with Amelie in a way that made the audience lose their minds every single night. Lando watched, arms crossed, a mixture of amusement and pure panic on his face.

—You’ve got this, baby,— Amelie teased, leaning in close enough for her breath to brush against his neck. —Just pretend it’s... you know... one of those nights in Monaco. No cameras. Just us.—

Lando groaned, covering his face with his hands. —You’re evil, you know that?—

Amelie grinned. —I know.—

They ran through the outro once, twice. By the third time, Lando was starting to get the hang of it

—See? You're a natural,— Amelie teased as they stepped behind the curtain, her body pressed against his as the stage lights dimmed.

Lando let out a breath, shaking his head. —I still feel like an idiot.—

—You look hot as fuck, actually,— she murmured against his jaw, pressing a kiss there before pulling away and walking back onto the stage. —The fans are gonna lose their minds tonight.—

Lando groaned dramatically, trailing after her. —Great. Just what I need. More attention.—

Amelie laughed, reaching for his hand and intertwining their fingers as they walked back toward her crew. Lando's heart softened at how easily she always grounded him, even when he was completely out of his comfort zone.

As they wrapped up soundcheck, Amelie’s band and crew scattered to prepare for the show. Lando lingered by the edge of the stage, watching her talk to her team, her energy electric as always. It was one of the things that made him fall for her in the first place—how effortlessly she commanded a room without even trying.

But beneath the confidence, he knew her. Knew the girl who still sometimes doubted herself. Who still struggled with the pressure, the noise, and the ghosts of her past. And tonight, he could feel her holding on to him a little tighter, knowing that after this, he’d be gone for weeks.

-------------

liked by ameliedaymanupdates, lanmelieshippers, and others

shortnsweetupdate: @ameliedayman pictured onstage in new blue bodysuit with ruffles! #LondonShortnSweet

View all 47,583 comments

f1baby: She’s glowing and thriving, we love to see it 🫶🏼💙 → lanmelieforever: @f1baby literally, she’s in her “I’m dating a McLaren driver” era and it SHOWS.

queenamelie: The outfit. The vocals. The stage presence. Everything about her is perfect.

notafan: She’s so overrated. I don’t get the hype. → ameliefanclub: @notafan girl you’re obsessed, you’re always in her comments 💀

landoslover: She looks unreal in blue omg

checotogoat: The fact she can do this and still pull up to the paddock and be an F1 wag... Mother. → gridprincess: @checotogoat she’s literally the queen of the grid now, everyone else can go home.

fan1: Okay but THIS OUTFIT?! The way she just gets prettier every day, it’s actually unfair. 😩💙 → fan2: @fan1 No bc she looks like a literal princess. The ruffles?? The color?? She ATE.

ameliesfairy: She looks so good, I’m actually SOBBING. The way she gives us a show every night 🫠✨ → lanmelieupdates: @ameliesfairy girl imagine Lando’s reaction when she walked out in THIS. Boy is down bad 😭 → fan3: @lanmelieupdates if he even saw it 😬 where is he tonight?!

hatersunited: She thinks this outfit is gonna make us forget what she did?? Girl bye 💀

norrisnation: Okay but real talk, where IS Lando?? Man hasn’t been spotted all night 😭

f1tea: So… no Lando in the audience tonight? 👀

ameliesbff: People saying Lando isn’t there… babes, he’s probably the one who took half these photos 😭 → landosimp: @ameliesbff EXACTLY, this man is obsessed with her and I love it

-------------

The lights dimmed, and the familiar haunting melody of Bed Chem echoed through the O2 Arena. The audience, already entranced by Amelie's sultry performance, erupted in anticipation as the camcorder effect flickered on the big screen.

But tonight, something was different.

As the male figure stepped onto the stage, camcorder in hand, the crowd expected Peter, her usual dancer. But when the spotlight hit him, the arena practically exploded.

It wasn’t Peter.

It was Lando Norris.

The screams were deafening, a mix of pure shock and absolute chaos as fans realized who had just taken Peter's place. Phones shot up in the air, fans recording the moment like their lives depended on it.

Lando grinned, cheeks flushed, clearly fighting back the nerves that had been eating him alive all day. But the second his eyes met Amelie's, everything else faded away.

He was just... hers.

Amelie smirked as she slowly backed up toward the closing curtain, her hand teasingly sliding up her body as she sang the final lines of the song. Lando followed, the camcorder capturing every sultry movement, every glance she threw his way.

The crowd's reaction was insane, but Amelie barely heard them. All she saw was him.

As the curtains closed behind them, the stage lights dimming until only their shadows could be seen, Lando dropped the camcorder and stepped closer to her.

Amelie’s back pressed against the velvet curtain, her breathing already uneven as Lando’s hands found her waist, pulling her flush against him. The audience could only see their silhouettes, but that made it even worse — they knew exactly what was happening.

The screams intensified as Amelie’s shadow leaned back, her hands slipping into Lando’s curls as he dipped his head to her neck.

—You're really playing the part now, huh?— she whispered against his ear, breathless from the tension.

Lando smirked against her skin, pressing a slow, open-mouthed kiss to the sensitive spot below her jaw.

—Thought I’d give the people a show,— he murmured, voice low and teasing. —But mostly... I just wanted an excuse to touch you like this.—

Amelie felt her knees weaken when Lando’s hands slid down her thighs, guiding her to lie down on the stage floor. Her legs instinctively wrapped around his waist as he positioned himself between them.

The crowd lost their absolute minds.

From their perspective, all they could see was Amelie’s silhouette beneath Lando, her legs hooked around him as he hovered over her, his mouth moving down her neck.

Lando's breath was hot against her skin as he whispered:

—You have no idea how much I’m going to miss you, baby. I’ve been spoiled with you all winter.—

Amelie’s heart raced as she felt his hands slowly slide up her thighs, teasingly squeezing as his lips brushed against her collarbone.

—Lando...— she breathed, already dizzy from the way he was touching her, from the fact that they could barely do anything right now.

—Mmm?— Lando hummed, kissing just below her ear. —What’s wrong, baby? I thought this was just acting...—

—You're such a fucking tease.—

Lando chuckled darkly against her skin, pressing his hips against hers just enough to make her gasp.

—You started this. I’m just... committing to the role.—

Amelie let out a soft, frustrated moan, fingers tugging at his curls.

—You're so lucky I have a show to finish, or I’d actually kill you right now.—

Lando grinned, kissing the corner of her mouth before whispering:

—Don’t worry, love. We’ve got all night after this.—

-------------

liked by lando4champion, ameliemyqueen, and others

shortnsweetupdates: GUYS. During the bed chem outro, Lando was the guy behind the curtain with Amelie... holy f*ck. We're actually living in a fanfic at this point. 🫣💖

View all 109,232 comments

shortnsweetfandom: Omg. Lando literally taking Peter's spot behind the curtain during the bed chem outro?? This is a WHOLE new level of relationship goals 😭💜

f1tea: Wait wait wait... Lando was behind the curtain with her during bed chem??? WHAT. Is this real life??? 💀💀 → speedyboi44: @f1tea literally what i need a better camera angle. i'm obsessed with them

thetruthhurtsfan: Oh, great, now we get to watch them make out behind the curtains. So mature and classy. 🙄 → ameliesswag: @thetruthhurtsfan lol, jealous much? You don't have to watch if you don't wanna. 😂 It's cute tho, let them live.

itsactuallycute: Ok but can we just appreciate how obsessed they are with each other? Like, it's literally adorable 🥺💜 → f1_lover22: @itsactuallycute I KNOW, right? They’re so cute together.

babygirl121: The way they’re always looking for ways to be together? Goals. 😍💖

hearteyesbabe: Look, I can’t even pretend I’m not obsessed with these two. Like, I’m sitting here screaming at my phone. 😍😭 → realfanlovers: @hearteyesbabe Honestly, same. I can’t even focus on the show because of how much I’m losing it over them. 😂

f1dreamer2025: No, like, we ALL KNOW what's going on back there. The shadows gave it away 😏 → racing_fanatics: @f1dreamer2025 Honestly, anyone who says they didn’t know what was happening is lying. 😂 You can feel the tension even from the shadows. → f1dreamer2025: @racing_fanatics exactly!! They wanted us to see. They wanted us to lose our minds tonight. 💀🔥

-------------

The roar of the O2, still echoing faintly in their ears, faded into the quiet hum of the London night as Lando pulled the McLaren Artura into the underground parking of Amelie’s apartment building. Amelie, her hair still slightly tousled from the stage, leaned her head against the cool leather of the seat, a soft sigh escaping her lips.

—That was… insane,— she murmured, a contented smile playing on her lips.

Lando reached over, gently squeezing her hand. —You were incredible, Ames. Absolutely incredible. Honestly, I’m still buzzing.—

They rode the elevator in comfortable silence, the unspoken weight of their impending separation hanging in the air. As they stepped into the penthouse apartment, Benny, the fluffy cream British Shorthair, bounded towards them, meowing a greeting that bordered on demanding. Björn, the grey one, remained perched on the back of the sofa, watching them with a disdainful glare.

—Hey, Benny-bear,— Amelie cooed, scooping the cat into her arms. —Someone missed me, didn’t you?—

—He misses you more than I do, little one,— Lando teased, a playful grin stretching across his face as he watched her fuss over the cat. —Which is saying something, considering I’ve been counting down the seconds until I could get you alone again.—

Amelie rolled her eyes, but a blush crept up her neck. —Oh, shut up, Lan. You’re such a sap.— She put Benny down, who promptly began weaving between Lando’s legs, purring loudly. —Go on, you two, entertain yourselves. I’m going to change.—

She disappeared into her bedroom, the sound of her heels clicking against the hardwood floor fading as the door closed. Lando watched her go, a slow smile spreading across his face. He bent down, scratching Benny behind the ears.

Lando chuckled, watching Benny’s enthusiastic purrs vibrate against his fingers. —You’re a good lad, aren’t you? Just like your mum, always wanting attention.— He glanced towards the closed bedroom door, a familiar warmth spreading through him. —Though, I’m hoping she’ll want my attention tonight.—

He wandered over to the living room, sinking into the plush sofa. Björn, with a theatrical flick of his tail, jumped down and stalked off towards the kitchen, a clear display of feline indifference. Lando grinned, undeterred. He knew Amelie loved the cats, and he loved watching her with them. It was another layer to her, a soft, domestic side that contrasted sharply with the fierce performer he’d just witnessed on stage.

A few minutes later, Amelie emerged from the bedroom, now clad in a silk robe that shimmered in the soft light of the apartment. Her hair, freed from its elaborate styling, cascaded down her shoulders in loose waves. Lando’s breath hitched slightly. She looked effortlessly beautiful, a vision of relaxed elegance.

—Better?— she asked, a slight smile curving her lips as she walked towards him.

Lando’s gaze darkened as it lazily trailed down her figure, taking in the way the silk robe clung to her curves.

—Much better,— he murmured, his voice dropping an octave as she settled beside him on the sofa. —Though, to be honest, I always liked it better on the floor.—

Amelie let out a soft laugh, rolling her eyes, but her body betrayed her — her thighs instinctively pressed together at the way he was looking at her.

—You’re actually insufferable,— she teased, though her voice was softer now.

Lando grinned, inching closer, his hand finding her thigh and squeezing lightly through the thin fabric of the robe.

—And yet, you’re obsessed with me,— he whispered against her ear, his lips brushing her skin just enough to make her shiver.

—Fuck off,— she mumbled, already feeling her body reacting to him.

Lando chuckled darkly, leaning in to press a slow, lingering kiss to her neck. —No, baby. You love when I talk to you like this. Don't you?—

Amelie’s breath hitched as his hand slipped beneath her robe, warm fingers tracing slow circles on her inner thigh.

—Lando...— she breathed, eyes fluttering shut.

—Mmm?— he hummed, lips trailing up to her jaw. —Gonna miss me, aren’t you? Gonna miss having me between your legs for the next four weeks?—

Amelie let out a quiet whimper, her head falling back against the sofa as he kissed down her neck, teeth grazing her skin in a way that made her body burn.

—You’re a complete and utter bastard,— she managed, her voice thick with desire. —And yes, I’m going to miss you. A lot.—

Lando’s grin widened, a predatory gleam in his eyes. —Good. Because I’m going to miss you too, Ames. Especially this.— His hand moved higher, cupping her intimately through the silk. —And this.—

He leaned in, capturing her lips in a deep, hungry kiss. Amelie’s hands found their way to his hair, tugging gently as the kiss grew more intense. The world outside the apartment faded away, leaving only the two of them, the heat of their bodies, the unspoken promises hanging in the air.

The kiss broke, both of them gasping for air. Lando’s eyes, dark with desire, met hers. —Let’s not waste any time, shall we?— he murmured, his voice husky.

Amelie nodded, her eyes mirroring his desire. With a swift movement, he lifted her into his arms, carrying her towards the bedroom. He gently laid her on the bed, his eyes never leaving hers.

He began to slowly undress her, his touch reverent, each caress sending shivers down her spine. The silk robe pooled around her feet, revealing the curves of her body, the soft skin that he knew so well. Amelie watched him, her breath catching in her throat as his eyes traced every inch of her.

—You’re so beautiful, Ames,— he whispered, his voice thick with emotion. —So fucking beautiful.—

He shed his own clothes, his eyes never leaving hers, the anticipation building between them. He knelt on the bed, his hand reaching out to trace the curve of her hip.

—Tell me you want me, baby,— he murmured, his voice low and demanding.

—I want you, Lando,— she breathed, her voice barely a whisper. —God, I want you so much.—

He leaned in, capturing her lips in another searing kiss, his hand moving between her legs, teasing her until she gasped. He moved over her, his body settling between her thighs. Amelie wrapped her legs around his waist, pulling him closer, desperate for the feeling of him inside her.

—Ready?— he whispered, his eyes searching hers.

She nodded, her eyes filled with a mixture of desire and anticipation. He entered her slowly, stretching her, filling her with his warmth. Amelie gasped, her body arching beneath him.

—Fuck, Lan,— she breathed, her nails digging into his back.

He began to move, slow and deliberate, building the tension between them. Amelie’s moans filled the room, her body moving in sync with his. He increased his pace, the rhythm building, their bodies moving together in a dance as old as time.

—You feel so good, Ames,— he groaned, his voice thick with desire. —So fucking good.—

The room was a symphony of soft moans and whispered curses, the air thick with the scent of arousal. Amelie’s hands gripped Lando’s shoulders, her nails digging into his skin as the pleasure intensified.

—Lando… oh god,— she gasped, her body trembling.

—That’s it, baby,— he murmured, his voice rough.

He shifted, pulling her legs higher, his movements growing more urgent. —Ride me, Ames. Just like this. Show me how much you want me.—

Amelie’s eyes widened, a flicker of surprise mixed with raw desire flashing across her face. This was new, a departure from their usual dynamic, but the command in his voice, the raw intensity in his eyes, sent a thrill through her. Without hesitation, she lifted herself, her body rising and falling against his, the friction igniting a fire within her.

—Fuck, Ames,— Lando groaned, his hands gripping her hips, guiding her movements. —That’s it. Just like that. You’re driving me crazy.—

Amelie’s breath came in ragged gasps, her body moving with a newfound confidence. The control, the power, it was intoxicating. She leaned forward, her lips finding his, her tongue tangling with his as she rode him harder, faster.

—You like this, don’t you?— he whispered against her lips, his voice thick with lust. —You like being in control.—

—Yes,— she breathed, her voice raw with desire. —God, yes.—

—Good girl,— he murmured, his hands tightening on her hips, urging her on. —Ride me, baby. Ride me until you scream my name.—

Amelie’s moans grew louder, her body trembling as she reached the edge. The pleasure was overwhelming, a wave crashing over her, sending shivers down her spine.

—Lando!— she cried out, her body convulsing around him.

He followed her, his own release a guttural groan, his body shuddering as he spilled inside her. They collapsed against each other, their breaths mingling, their bodies still thrumming with the aftershocks of their shared pleasure.

A comfortable silence settled over them, broken only by the soft sounds of their breathing. Lando’s hand traced lazy circles on Amelie’s back, his fingers lingering on the soft skin beneath his touch.

—God, Ames,— he murmured, his voice husky. —You were incredible.—

Amelie smiled against his chest, her heart still pounding in her ears. —You weren’t so bad yourself, Lan,— she teased, her voice soft.

He chuckled, tightening his hold on her. —I’m going to miss this,— he whispered, his voice tinged with regret.

—Me too,— she breathed, her fingers tracing the lines of his chest. —Four weeks is a long time.—

—Too long,— Lando agreed, his voice low. He kissed the top of her head, his lips lingering for a moment. —But we’ll make it. Japan will be here before we know it.—

They lay tangled together, the warmth of their bodies a comforting presence in the quiet room. Eventually, exhaustion claimed them, and they drifted off to sleep, their bodies still intertwined.

Amelie swallowed the lump forming in her throat and forced a shaky smile.

—It doesn’t matter what happens in the race, Lan,— she murmured, her thumb brushing over his lips. —I’ll always be proud of you. Always.—

Lando’s eyes glistened with something she couldn’t quite place as he leaned into her touch, pressing a soft kiss to her palm.

—Fuck, Ames. You’re going to kill me with that.—

Her heart shattered at the sound of his voice, thick with emotion.

—Come here,— she whispered, tugging him down until their foreheads touched.

His breath fanned against her lips as he kissed her, slow and deep, like he was trying to memorize her taste. Amelie whimpered into his mouth, her fingers tangling in his curls, desperate to hold onto him for just a few more seconds.

When he pulled away, her tears had already spilled over, trailing down her cheeks. Lando wiped them away with his thumbs, kissing her once more, this time softer.

—Four weeks. That’s all, baby,— he whispered against her lips. —We’ve survived worse, remember?—

She let out a choked laugh, nodding. —When you broke my heart in 2021, yeah.—

Lando groaned, his head falling against her chest.

—Are you seriously bringing that up right now? Jesus, woman.—

Amelie giggled through her tears, tugging his curls playfully. —You deserve it for leaving me like this.—

He lifted his head, eyes narrowing. —You’re evil. I’m genuinely obsessed with you, and you’re making me suffer on purpose.—

She smirked, brushing her lips against his. —I know. And you love it.—

Lando groaned, his hands gripping her waist.

—You’re fucking unbearable. I swear when I get to Japan, I’m not letting you leave the hotel room for the entire weekend.—

Amelie’s stomach flipped at the thought.

—Promise?— she whispered, eyes darkening.

Lando kissed her again, rough and desperate.

—Promise.—

He finally pulled back, but not before pressing one last lingering kiss to her forehead.

—Go back to sleep, baby. I’ll text you when I land.—

Amelie nodded, her vision blurry as she watched him grab his suitcase and quietly slip out the door. The sound of the lock clicking echoed through the empty apartment, and suddenly, the weight of his absence hit her like a freight train.

She curled into his side of the bed, pulling his hoodie from the night before over her head and inhaling the faint scent of his cologne that still lingered on the fabric.

Benny hopped onto the bed, curling against her chest, purring softly as if he knew her heart was breaking.

—Four weeks, baby boy,— Amelie whispered, stroking the cat’s fur as tears streamed down her face. —I can survive four weeks... right?—

Benny meowed softly in response, pressing his little head against her.

She let out a shaky breath, her chest aching with longing.

Four weeks felt like an eternity.

But for him... she’d wait forever.

[khaoala]

Lore request number 1847389291 (sorry I've been asking so much lmao new som som trying my best to catch up) what happened at firsts graduation I saw that hug and that kt almost didn't go but no details help? Pls?

anon, first of all, feel free to send fk lore questions whenever you like. i'll try to give as much context as i can, and people also add things in, and it's a blast, i love when these come in.

second of all, i'm so very glad you're making me talk about first's graduation. it's probably one of my favorite firstkhao moments.

first's graduation (he has a bachelor's degree in cyber business management and graduated with honors, he's that guy) happened on december 15, 2021, so two weeks after the announcement of the eclipse during gmmtv 2022. this event is what we (or at least i do) like to call "the event that inspired the plot of our skyy 2 x the eclipse" because it's basically what happened 😏😏

as you can imagine, graduating is a very important moment and in thailand they do this thing a lot of holding fan gatherings when an artist graduates and many of their friends come to congratulate them too (like when earth, firstkhao and arm went to mix's graduation last year).

first had a lot people over to see him. besides his family members, ofc, first's favorite bruda (tay tawan) attended, gawin, ciize, louis, love, nanon and many many others.

but khaotung, being the rascal that he is, told first that something came up and that he wouldn't be able to attend first's graduation which made first properly sulky. i'm not even kidding. they were all using masks ofc because 2021, covid, all that shit, but we know mr. kanaphan to have amazingly expressive eyes and baby boy looked so sad and pouty because his best friend said he wouldn't attend (tumblr doesn't let me post more than one video, but i'll link you to the videos and the graduation tag so you can check out his contained tantrum in the end of this post).

at some point when ciize (who is the founder of this fandom, may i add, since when they were just a ghostship, she was already in the trenches) approached first, and he was talking in the phone with khaotung and first offered her the phone and she asked "what did you do to make him so angry, khaotung?!"

ofc khaotung was just joking and ofc he wouldn't miss his best friend's graduation. he showed up and i kid you not, it was like first's sunny disposition came back to him in a blink. ofc, he was still annoyed bc khaotung fooled him and there were many instances where it looked like he was going to hit khaotung, but khaotung knows his baby bestie and stayed by his side all the time. there were a few moments when first would be talking to other people but his hand would stay around khaotung (there's one particular video of them talking to what i believe is one of the staff, and while first's eyes are on them, he keeps caressing khaotung's back absentmindedly because the next thing we assume happens is that first scolded khaotung - again - for pranking him).

khaotung was having a blast that day playing around with first. and first was also trying to look nonchalant at some point which was so adorable. you know how in the end of our skyy 2, after ayan's surprise to akk and how he says, "i told you i loved seeing you get pranked. when you make an angry face, you look so… (cute)". that is firstkhaotung during first's graduation.

you can search the tag #FirstkpGraduation on twitter where you'll find many more videos and pictures and here's the links to some of my favorite videos since i can't post them here:

[ link one ] [ link two ] [ link three ] [ link four ] [ link five ] [ link six ]

[moldychefboyardeecan]

Too Close!

A Sanji one shot I thought was cute.

WC: 1.17k

Parings: youxsanji

tags: cooking?, comfort, cute,injury,might be ooc

a/n: i get injured/weak..a lot. I often feel like a burden since so many people have to re-accommodate me. So..I guess take it from my perspective, this is how I feel. Last real post before Japan yahoo.!

When it came to Vinsmoke Sanji, you didn’t know how much of a fragile man he is. After finding out, it drew you closer to him. For so long, he kept you stable, a reminder that there’s a window to open, and he would be the sun. Always pampering you and the crew, but always kept his gaze lingering, and you seemed to have matched that too; because every time you meet his eyes, you give him a small smile, while he turns red, his eyes practically becoming hearts.

After a while, you both were more adventurous than before when it came with each other. A giggle here, a laugh there, a brush of hair away from your face and his. It was starting to become more common between the two of you to stay close together. You started washing the dishes after him, and he tried to teach you how to cook. In which you burned your fingers by placing them  too close to the torch when you were trying to flambé something.

“Fuck! Im sorry..” you muttered, placing the finger which was most in pain by your mouth, basically sucking the burn, as if the irritation would go away, but at most, all it did was give you a sense of temporary relief. Sanji took your hand and kissed your finger. “Mon Soleil, it happens. I’ll finish up here. Go to Chopper and I’ll meet you in your quarters to check on you.” Your face turned red and you were giggling— until you realized where you were and this wasn’t a daydream. Then your face, fully red in embarrassment now, gave him a hesitant ‘thank you’ before dashing out of the kitchen, trying to catch your breath from that moment.

Too Close..! Too close! Too-

..Close. A hand holds your shoulder, and by the sleeve, you recognize who it is: Sanji. Too close. But not in a way to not be friends..

..right?

“You okay? You seemed a bit..off in there. I told you to go to Chopper damnit! Not just stand outside the kitchen doors!” He gritted his teeth between his phrases, trying to hold himself back from shaking you back and forth to remind you to get a grip on yourself.

You give off a soft chuckle, in awe of his care and concern for you.

Maybe we can be this close, as friends.

After a good scolding from Sanji reminding you to be careful in the kitchen, Chopper's initial shock from your injury, you were in your quarters, your hand feeling a bit better, your fingers throbbing still. Chopper bandaged your middle and ring finger together, making it a bit harder to move the two fingers on your left hand. You sit on the edge of your bed, and lay your back against the mattress, your legs still hanging on the edge. You were a good wildcard for the Straw Hats, having helped Nami draw a map, and Franky with some repairs. But this injury would have you out of service for a few days, since most of your handiwork on the ship required both hands.

If only I didn’t fuck up that flambé, maybe I wouldn’t be so useless right now.

You sighed and stared at your ceiling, thinking about how you could still stay valuable to these pirates, who allowed you to be here, to be free. Maybe you could practice your switchblade? After all, you fight with that small thing, and you’re often well off just with that.

 No, I’d just hurt my hands more..

Cooking?

I can’t hold the pan right now, I burnt myself today.

Drawing?

My left hand can’t handle the pressure of holding something down.

Reading?

I can’t hold the book.

You groan in frustration, feeling tears form.

Why am I so damn useless right now?!

You get up and place your hand on your counter to carry you up. Your left hand. The sensitive skin behind the bandages react to the sudden pressure and in return you feel the pain burning your fingers again. You hate sitting on your ass, watching everyone work hard while you couldn’t do anything but just that. Watch. Watch how they carry their weight while you have to be put on rest. Watch them sweat while you rest. Watch them laugh. It hurt, knowing that you were on the sides for now. Those thoughts finally broke you, sending tears to your eyes. Trying to hold back a sob, you bite your lip and take deep breath through your nose. You give in to the sadness and start crying, letting it all out, whimpering and sounding like a small child. You move into your bed, away from your table, curling yourself in, leaving your injured arm out, while your other arm wraps around you.

“Am..I, really..that..useless?..” You whisper to yourself, in between sniffles. You felt your other arm wrap around yo— Wait. Your injured arm is still out. You look up and see a blonde man, hair covering one side of his face, only showing one of his big beautiful blue eyes and his curly eyebrows. Sanji.

“No, you aren’t.” He said, rubbing your side while he sat on the edge of your bed. “Trust me, you’re amazing. More than anyone would know. More than we let on, actually.” He ended with a chuckle, feeling his genuine heart echoing from him. He laid his back on the bed, his legs on the edge, as if he were still sitting. “I think I’m probably the biggest burden here, if we’re being honest.” He added.

You try to recuperate your voice back , but all that comes out are hesitant, shaking words. “What makes you say that? You’ve benefited me in many ways.”

He smiles softly, before slowly turning his demeanor to a solemn one. “I'm glad. At least you think I can help.”

Your face stiffens up, and forms a concerned look. “I'm serious. You mean..a lot to me.” You gulp down the anxiety and tension, preparing yourself for anything that would come after that.  “A lot more than I thought.”

He looks up at you, his face melting slowly once again, his eyes already swollen with a quivering lip. “You..mean it?.”

“Why wouldn’t I?”

With that, he crashed into your shoulder, pulling you into a hug tight and close.

“Then we can mean a lot to each other.” He cupped your face, and pressed your forehead against his, before pulling your lips into his. It wasn’t rough, it wasn’t careless, but a promise. A promise to both of you, to be enough not for everyone, but for the only other people that mattered in the world at that moment: eachother.

You were right. This isn’t too close. This is perfect.

[beforetimes]

Hello! I was catching up on your Shizun Luo Binghe/demon disciple Shen Yuan and I had a question about the second post.

How did Jin Lan City plague occur without svsss Shen Yuan saving Zhuzhi-lang while retrieving the mushroom seeds?

Shen Yuan was in the abyss during that time and wouldn’t have been there. If he’d gone before while he was still a disciple, Jin Lan City would have happened sooner. So did Shen Yuan just speed run the abyss with his meta knowledge faster then svsss Luo Binghe?

Or is there some other factor that caused Luo Binghe to somehow save Zhuzhi-lang while Shen Yuan was in the abyss?

Because Jin Lan City plague wouldn’t have happened if Zhuzhi-lang hadn’t been trying to pay Shen Qingqiu “back” (in his warped sense of repayment) for saving his life so he could hide him from humanity and require him away in the demon realm. That’s why it caught Shen Qingqiu off guard in canon.

So if Luo Binghe saved Zhuzhi-lang somehow (maybe he was out with Liu Qingge who was trying to distract his friend from his grief and himself from his own and ran into Zhuzhi-lang and saved him because all he could see when he saw a demon was the expression on Shen Yuan’s face as he pleaded before he died), it would make sense that Zhuzhi-lang to fixate on Luo Binghe (a human in this) and still need to go through the attempt to separate someone from the human realm.

Obviously, this would play out differently than Shen Qingqiu’s version. Luo Binghe wouldn’t be going on trial at Huan Hua probably (unless HHPM still had a thing for LBH’s mom and was trying to creepily come up with a reason to lock him up in HHP for creepy reasons??) and I can’t think of a reason Luo Binghe would have been after the mushroom to have gotten it for Zhuzhi-lang— AND ACTUALLY I HAVE A COMPLETELY DIFFERENT TANGENTIALLY RELATED QUESTION!!

Okay so if Luo Binghe is 100% human does that mean he’s not the son of Tianlang-Jun in this. Or is Tianlang-Jun human in this?? And where would that place Zhuzhi-lang??

Either Zhuzhi lang is a human and then we have a hole to fill of why sowers went to Jin Lan City. Or he’s a demon and we have a different hole to fill of who he’s obsessively devoted to and trying to save. Would there even be anyone to save?? If Tianlang-Jun is human, who was sealed under Bailu Mountain?? Was anyone sealed??

…okay I’ll stop spiraling.. I could spiral on this for hours but this is already long and I need to go to sleep 😅

going to be so honest with you because this blog is a place where we don't lie in hindsight but like. i saw the prompt in my inbox at around three in the morning and thought wow! that's so fun and angsty! and wrote the blurb out at four in the morning in my notes app while actively drifting in and out of sleep before turning in. so like. i didn't even consider 2% of this when writing that out. lmfao.

but! on that note i loveeee the ideas here so much... especially with zhuzhi lang! the idea of luo binghe learning to empathize with demons in a way he never has before because seeing shen yuan die thinking he was hated traumatizing him so much > > > actually peak. i think in this scenario, because i imagine tianlang-jun is a human and no one is really. sealed under the mountain. since i imagine that shen yuan would be the first humanoid demonic big bad of the cultivation world rather than tianlang-jun. and if luo binghe did help zhuzhi lang it would be trying to help him get his human body back or something along those lines, while luo binghe was looking for the sun and moon dew mushrooms [or whatever they're called] in some half-hearted last ditch event to somehow prove his disciple was alive.

honestly a lot of these could have much more interesting explanations / ways to tackle them i just am not built to figure it out lmfaoooo. i think my issue is that i like character-focused stories so much more than heavily indulging specific plot points. so in my head i'm like it would be so fun to break down this toxic relationship between shen yuan and luo binghe if it was the other way around while all these details about the sowers and zhuzhi lang etc etc etc get lost.

though i ALSO!!! really like the idea that the huan hua palace master was trying to lure luo binghe to the water prison because of his hang ups with his mother. because i feel that makes a tad more sense than the random-ish 'shen qingqiu is a bad person so we should lock him up' i vaguely remember from canon (says girl who hasn't read these books in years. do not quiz me please)

many fun things to think about. thank you for reminding me all these things happened LOL

[gamesetattach]

On the Record

Jannik Sinner x Reader A well liked personality in the tennis world, reader is one the favored sports commentators. Her interviews always make headlines for all the right reasons—the people love to watch her crack all their favorite players... especially Jannik Sinner because, I mean, the poor boy seems to just shatter. Honestly. Somewhere in time, this was an 800 word blurb... And now it's nearly 8,000. Not sure when that happened. This just became a tennis player personality study at some point, tbh

---

You weren’t just another sports commentator—you’d quickly made a name for yourself in your short career in the tennis world. The networks and the fans loved you, and so did the players. Your approach was the kind where players actually liked talking, one that made post-match interviews feel less like an obligation and more like an easy conversation. You had built a reputation for striking the perfect balance—professional and sharp, but always with just the right amount of humor to put players at ease.

It wasn’t uncommon for your analyses and your interviews to be clipped and spread, tennis fans enjoyed your commentary and admired how effortlessly you got athletes to open up. You asked questions that felt fresh, steering clear of the usual clichés that players had answered a hundred times before. You could tease them just enough to get a smile, knew when to pull back, when to lean in. And many of the players responded more than favorably to that.

---

Ben Shelton was a natural entertainer—electric on the court, brimming with confidence, always ready with a quip. But post-match interviews? Reporters could easily get him ticked off—understandably so. Questions were too often repetitive, formulaic, and sometimes interviews could be straight up disrespectful.

But with you holding the mic, it was never that.

"Ben! Congratulations on the win—another five-setter. You really like giving the crowd a show, huh?" you teased once, microphone in hand as he wiped sweat from his forehead.

Shelton grinned, shaking his head. "Look, I’m just trying to keep ticket sales up. If I finish in straights, what’s the fun in that?"

You raised an eyebrow. "Tell us, do you hold back on that power serve of yours sometimes—just to keep the game going?"

"I don’t know about all that," he replied smoothly, "But I will say, the longer I’m out here, the more entertainment value there is. I’m doing everyone else a favor."

"Selfless. A true man of the people." The crowd laughed, and so did you. “I can see why they like you.”

Ben nodded at you, moving to dap you up as the cameraman dipped the lens for the interview to wrap up. "See, you get it."

The moment was well loved, fans loving the ease of your exchanges. And that was nothing unusual—your interviews often made waves.

---

Your position often called for a sensitive touch, and your intuition meant you navigated that aspect better than most. You were always sure to respect the players’ boundaries.

When Jack Draper won his first top-ten match of the season, it hadn’t been pretty. He had barely scraped through in three sets, visibly struggling throughout, even throwing up courtside between games. It was impressive tennis, but it had been the kind of match that took everything out of both players, winner or not.

Networks had a certain, set agenda, and the players all knew of that obligation. And so some commentators might’ve been waiting, mic in hand—ready to pounce with questions about endurance, fitness, and whether he should’ve retired—without being mindful of the condition he was in. You’d offered Draper’s circumstance more tact and understanding than others would have.

You caught sight of him near the bench, after barely celebrating and stumbling his way to the net to shake hands with his opponent. He was still catching his breath as he toweled off and gathered his things, the sideline cameras were on him as your own crew quickly assembled in the middle of the court. You’d gently approached, mic cast behind your back to prevent any sound from being picked up, crouching slightly so he wouldn’t have to stop his movements to answer you. 

The exhaustion was evident in his features to all who watched, his skin pale beneath the sweat, and you kept your voice soft, careful. "Jack, hey—no pressure. Are you feeling up for the interview? All good if not, I can cover for you."

Jack blinked up at you, sluggish, like it took effort to focus. For a split second, you’d even wondered if you should’ve asked at all—maybe it was better to deflect the crowd and let him slip away. But then recognition clicked in his eyes, and for a moment you thought he might wave you off, but he moved his head just a fraction down in a nod.

With a small, grateful smile at his lips, he said. "Nah, I’m good. Just… maybe we keep it short?"

You nodded immediately. "Of course. I got you."

So you’d kept the interview brief and simple, unprobing. Your voice stayed even, the questions light and general.

"Jack, congratulations. That was an impressive win against an impressive opponent. What are your thoughts coming out of it?" You asked, keeping the question away from his state.

 "Yeah, tough one today, but looking forward to tomorrow." Jack exhaled, running a hand through his hair. “Apologizes for the throw up, everyone.”

A soft chuckle rippled through the crowd.

You’d smiled, keeping it easy. "I won’t keep you long, but one thing’s for sure—you showed a lot of fight out there and we’re sure you will tomorrow as well. Anything more you’d like to say to the crowd, along with that?"

Jack turned toward the stands, where the crowd erupted into cheers just at the acknowledgment. "Yeah, just… thanks for sticking it out with me. You all carried me through."

You gave him a nod, and he backed out of the frame with a grateful look as he took your okay to head out. "Alright. Go get some rest, Jack. You’ve earned it."

---

Sometimes, you’d poke fun with the players—though you never crossed the line. And those interviews always showed the strength of your rapport with those on tour.

Carlos Alcaraz was truly sunshine personified. Always wearing that wide smile, he was friendly with everyone. And, with you, he was always outright charmed, knowing the interview would be memorable and fun.

After yet another dramatic comeback win, you stood across from him, shaking your head. "Carlos, you make my job so hard. I try to plan questions, but every time you pack the game with so many good shots I have a hard time choosing which one to talk about."

“Sorry.” He said, grinning and laughing up at the crowd. "You know, maybe I'll make it easy for you next time."

"Now, don’t do that. We love watching you fall into the splits and run all over the place." You both chuckled, and you continued with your questions. “Tell me, today was a spectacular match—now you're moving on to the finals—will you get a tattoo of the match date?”

“We’ll see,” Carlos’s smile had widened at that, if even possible. "If I win, maybe. Let’s see."

“What makes a day great enough to qualify for a tattoo of the date?”

“I always just try and play well, but if there’s something really special—then I like to remember that.” He shifted his weight back and forth between his feet, nodding up at the crowd as they cheered. “Especially with the great fan atmosphere, like here in the tournament.”

"Well Carlos, if you continue playing as well as you did today, I think you may run out of space pretty soon."

He’d grinned, pointing to the tiny text of his newest addition. "I get them small, still have lots of room. On the legs and all—"

You shook your head. "I say, skip the legs—go straight for the forehead."

He threw his head back at that, leaning up and away from the mic for a full-bellied laugh, and the crowd erupted with him. "We’ll see, we’ll see."

"Alright, Carlos! Thank you for your time. Great tennis tonight, we’ll see you again in two nights against Rune!" You easily finished, wrapping up the interview as he waved once more to the crowd.

---

The same often went with Andrey Rublev, a character loved by all. An intense firestorm on the court, but forever soft-spoken off it. He was one that could be reserved and bashful in interviews, even though he often couldn’t help his witty remarks—a large part of why he was so well liked. 

“Andrey, congratulations! You’re having a great year so far—making it to the finals again after just winning a title,” He nodded, taking off his headband as you began the interview. “I was wondering, do you have any new superstitions this season? Or any old ones that have evolved over time?"

“Superstitions… I don’t know...” Rublev exhaled, brushing a hand through his damp hair. His eyes landed on the headband he was spinning on a finger. "Maybe this one—the headband. When I was younger, in juniors or something, I didn't have this long hair, but now before the match I’m tying like this every time."

“Ah yes, I’ve had the privilege of seeing you primp and preen before a match.” You’d teased, laughing lightly. “It’s quite the routine.”

“Yes…” He smiled, looking down a little. “It’s not so easy.”

“I mean, yeah, with that head of hair—I believe it.” You grinned at him. “I know you always looked up to Rafa Nadal growing up, do you feel like it’s kind of an ode to him?”

“Yes, of course. He was always my favorite—I was… when I was little, I was always wearing the same kit as him. Same shorts and shirt, and headband—everything. But, yes, it takes some time in front of the mirror.”

“That it does—you diva.” You laughed, and those in the stands followed suit.

“No… Diva? What is this?” Rublev glanced off camera before looking back at you, perplexed but smiling still.

“Don’t worry about it… They know.” The crowd cheered again.

He shook his head at you, chuckling a little before he gestured to you in confusion at the crowd.

You continued on, still laughing to yourself. “Everyone, Andrey Rublev! Our finalist—thank you Andrey!”

With that, the sound of your mics cut out and the other commentators came back into the audio, but the camera stayed on you and Rublev—panning out a bit. The remainder of your teasing conversation could be seen, with you presumably explaining what you had meant by diva between laughs and him playfully swatting you away immediately after. 

It was a fan favorite moment, one that Rublev couldn’t seem to escape for the rest of the season. He was always sure to give you shit for it whenever he saw you around, but no one—including him—could deny that you always carried out the most entertaining interviews.

Though no interview was watched quite as closely as your ones with Jannik Sinner, however…

---

When it came to Jannik, the lens people would watch your interviews with became something else entirely.

The same reason people loved your interviews still held true—the way you got players to open up, the way you made even the most media-wary athletes feel at ease.

And Jannik wasn’t cold by any means, but he was careful. Composed. Someone who, in most press conferences and interviews, gave measured almost scripted answers, efficient and to the point. He was never rude—just reserved. He’d smile, be polite, but rarely let people in further than he had to.

And yet, every time it was you standing across from him, microphone in hand, his expression changed—softer, just barely perceptible. But people started to catch on… And when they did, they started to look for it as well.

A flicker of something lighter in his eyes, the way his usual, fidgety stance seemed to relax. If fans didn’t know him well, they might’ve missed it. But those who did could always tell that, even if he would never express it outright, he genuinely enjoyed talking to you.

---

One of the first times people noticed it was soon after your promotion, when you conducted one of your earlier on-court interviews.

It was after an iconic, comeback three-set win of Jannik’s. And something about the way he answered your questions—the way he looked at you—set the viewers abuzz. It was like the crowd had faded away for him. He still inserted his usual expressions of gratitude, but it seemed you and your questions were the center of his focus. 

"Jannik, long night for you. With quite an abrupt turnaround," you had started, a smile in your voice as he nodded at your words. "Was there ever a moment where you doubted that you could take back the match? You were down for the first half there."

“No—,” He blinked, a smile slowly growing on his face. "What do you think of me? I try not to doubt… Of course, it’s not so easy but…"

He grinned at you as he trailed off, and you jumped right back in. "Oh, so you always knew you could take the game back is what you’re saying?"

His eyes stayed on you, corners of his lips twitching up again. "No, but—it’s important to stay positive. You know… I just try and play well."

“You just try…” You scoffed and looked at the camera. “You know, I think on most people’s best and most positive days, they probably can't serve so many aces in a row…”

Jannik shrugged, smiling up at the crowd as the crowd laughed at his nonchalant reaction.

It wasn’t necessarily a funny answer, or even a funny question, but Jannik’s cheeky smile and your quiet laughs in response added another layer to the tone of the interview. The audience cheered at his demeanor, a rare display of tasteful gloating from one of the world's best players. 

That interview reemerged pretty consistently, you just brought out a different side of him. Not too many saw it then, but those who did were hooked.

---

The moment people most loved to replay the most went down after a late-afternoon match, the sun casting long shadows over the court as Jannik walked back on court for the interview, exhausted but victorious against his self-proclaimed rival. When he saw you waiting for him on the service, he didn’t just nod in acknowledgement and snap into his professional, media mode—his face visibly brightened, a slow smile tugging at his lips before he even reached you.

The smile stayed on his face, eyes fixed on you as you gave the cursory congratulations and eased the viewers into the interview while welcoming Jannik to the frame. "—and you had quite a few dives today, are you still in one piece?" You transitioned the introduction into the first question, microphone poised at his mouth after asking.

He nodded, eyes having never left you, but stayed quiet. His mouth opened as if starting to answer, but then he stopped and shook his head, hands on his hips. "... Sorry, can you repeat the question."

He pushed down protruding hairs under the brim of his cap with a sheepish smile as the audience laughed.

“Wow, zoning out already—that was only the first question Jannik.” You shook your head in teasing disapproval at the camera, and the corner of his mouth lifted to widen his smile at your reaction. “That might have been an answer to the question in and of itself—maybe you’re not in one piece… I asked about the dives you took during the match—any scrapes or scratches?”

“Ah, okay,” He nodded in understanding, catching up and smiling when people laughed once more. “No I—I’m okay. It is hard court, yes, but no scrapes so far.”

“Seems like Carlos has that effect on you, doesn’t he? You’re always diving after his balls—” You cut yourself off immediately, hand slapping to cover your mouth when you realized how that last sentence could have been interpreted.

You doubled over in laughter, unable to help yourself, and Jannik joined in when he pieced it together. It took you too long to recover, more time than was professional for sure, but the stadium was laughing along with you. Jannik watched as you tried again and again to compose yourself before you broke back into laughter each time, he chuckled at you while wagging a finger at the camera.

Then he set his palm on top of yours, taking your hand holding the mic to lift it to his mouth. “What kind of interview is this?”

The crowd went wild, pleased to see Jannik play into the humor of the situation. You wiped tears from your eyes and covered your face in embarrassment, his hand still over yours for longer than it needed to be. 

When he returned the mic, and your hand, you gave an exaggerated look of regret towards the camera, breaking the fourth wall in more ways than one. “So sorry if I violated any network guidelines with that one… Did not mean for the interview to take this turn…”

And then the production assistant behind the camera, also in tears from laughter, signaled that time was almost up. Jannik teasingly threw his hands in the air when he saw the count down, poking fun at the fact that you’d derailed the interview and eaten up the screen time.

You lifted the mic and continued, shaking your head at yourself once more while smiling. “Looks like we need to wrap this up… Jannik any final words?”

“Well this is also some of my first words…” He laughed as you mouthed something in response. Don’t remind me, you’d mimed. “But I want to thank everyone here for the good energy and Carlos for another great game… And, of course, thank you for finishing off this day with such a… interesting interview.”

He said the last bit towards you, not missing the opportunity to tease you further—and nobody missed that.

The interview had understandably blown up. It had all the makings of a viral moment. An accidental, suggestive line implicating both Carlos and Jannik was bound to spread like a wildfire. Adding Jannik’s funny reaction on top of that only fueled the fire. People enjoyed seeing the facade of his usual composure break, fans were quick to interact with those rare moments where he revealed more of his charm and humor. 

Though somehow, with all the traction the clip received, the discourse always seemed to land on you. Or rather, how he was with you. After getting past the comedic banter in the video, people started commenting on his behavior. On how he looked at you, how he seemed to miss the first question because he was admiring you. How he took your hand with no hesitation, and how you seemed unfazed by the touch. He was clearly comfortable with you—and you with him, judging by how naturally you took his teasing.

And so, anyone who wasn't already watching the two of you closely certainly started to after that.

---

It wasn’t just post-match interviews people watched. It was media days, press conferences, those brief moments of footage where your paths crossed in hallways.

Fans really started to notice the way his eyes would stay on you, taking just a second longer than necessary before answering the question. The way he always seemed to open up when it was you on the other side of the mic. 

Jannik wasn’t the type to talk much during an interview, he kept his answers concise, but with you, there was always something—an easy joke, a quick remark, sometimes he’d even ramble on in an answer. 

"Try to behave this one," he had joked when you were up to interview him after another game against Carlos, referencing that one, fateful slipup of yours a few months after its debut. You gave him a look, that line was sure to spread everywhere whether or not the rest of the interview was entertaining, and you both knew it. The people present in the stands were already whooping.

"I’ll try my best,” You smirked anyways. “I’ll try my best not to mention how Carlos gets you to fall for him.”

The crowd roared, and he shifted his jaw as he laughed with you. “That’s not how you said this the last time.”

“Well, I made many promises to many important people that I wouldn’t say anything like last time. Ever again.” You winked at the camera. “—Not on TV, at least.”

He inhaled a laugh, “Good. It’s for the best.”

"Okay… Let’s leave that behind us." You raised your brows at him as you offered a hand to shake in truce.

“Okay. Promise.” He took your hand, trying to look serious while fighting back a smile.

“Okay.” You nodded up at him, matching his expression even though your lips pursed with an incoming laugh, hands intertwined.

You both just stood like that for a beat, looking at each other with your hands clasped in a stilled handshake, laughter clearly threatening to take over. He was the first to break the silence.

“Are you going to ask a question, or what?” A smile ripped onto his face, and then your laugh just had to come out. Everyone in the stands had been in pieces since the interview’s start, but the laughter doubled at that.

“Yeah, yeah,” You shook your head. “What am I going to do with you—I’m going to be out of a job.”

“Ah, no. You’re too good for that.” His own laugh had faded into an amused smile. An affectionate one, even.

“Hear that?” You address the camera, deadpanning. “Glad we got that on tape.”

That interview continued on without any inappropriate hitches, though it stayed just as entertaining throughout. 

And it wasn’t just a one-off thing. The more you interviewed him, the more obvious it became—it was a pattern. And the common denominator was you.

Fans were relentless. They clipped every smirk, every subtle glance. Every moment where Jannik let himself react.

He’s always laughing when its her She’s the only one who gets him to act like this. i love how he forgets all his media training when he’s with her Jannik, blink twice if you’re in love There’s no way they’re not a thing. If theyre not, they should be. Like now.

---

The best part? The most implicating part? You never even tried to make those moments with him. It just… happened. It always happened.

Like the time you’d been interviewing another player on court—someone else entirely, an opponent he’d lost to. Jannik could be seen in the back of the frame, still packing up at his bench. You hadn’t given any sign of noticing him, there was no moment of acknowledgement, you were faced away from Jannik as you interviewed the winning player with your usual, unique questions and comfortable professionalism—but the viewers’ eyes were on Jannik in the distance more than the interview itself, because the camera had caught everything. 

It seemed the moment Jannik realized it was you speaking, that it was you on court, his head snapped to your direction. He was slower in gathering his things, looking back at you often. Even when signing things for fans on the sidelines, he’d turn his face to you every time you laughed. When he did finally walk out, his eyes stayed trained on you, turning his neck towards you until you simply had to leave line of sight. 

And, even after the loss, it seemed he had a slight smile playing on his lips when he left. The soft kind, the same one he always seemed to wear when you were around. 

Fans had slowed it down frame by frame, zooming in—and they saw it all.

---

The phenomenon quickly took on a life of its own. People had moved past just noticing, fan just straight up speculated after a while. Even other players and commentators were aware of the trope—it was everywhere online and it was hard to ignore the dynamic between you and him even in person.

It started small. A few viral clips, some curious tweets, the occasional comment under a post-match interview: He never laughs like that with anyone else. But that phase passed quickly. Then the compilation videos came in swarms soon after. The frame-by-frame breakdowns of every interview, every shared glance, every moment where Jannik seemed just a little too engaged, a little too interested.

"It’s the way he looks at her," Coco Guaff even said in a WTA YouTube video, the content being a montage of players’ talking about associations and relationships with umpires and broadcasters. You and Coco had an easy friendship, despite your role usually landing on the ATP side, so it only made sense that she dropped your name… 

But it just so happened that her mention of you very quickly devolved into propaganda supporting those fan speculations of Jannik’s relationship to you.

"I mean, that’s not normal." She continued, shrugging at the camera as she giggled to herself. “The proof is in the footage, I don’t know what to tell you.” 

And that wasn’t the only instance—Coco herself being notorious for backing the allegations.

Once, a post on a tennis podcast’s Instagram had gone doubly viral after she liked it. It was a screenshot of Jannik in mid-interview with you, visibly engaged, stars in his eyes. The text above the image read: Mans has never been happier in his life.

And the comments were rampant.

Need someone to look at me like that Guys, Coco liked?? You’d never know he just won a title, looks like the highlight of his day is just her Si vede che è cotto! Uh, heyy Coco

Another, a comparison of images—A photo of Jannik immediately after a match, visibly drained, side-by-side with another of him only minutes after, beaming down at you. Find someone who looks at you the way Jannik Sinner looks at his favorite commentator.

Forget clostebol, bros drug is just love Si vede che è cotto a puntino if they have no fans, im dead 

Even official tennis accounts and sports networks got in on it, subtly referencing it in posts and during match breakdowns and things of that sort. 

The ATP social team once posted a story of you two laughing behind the scenes on media day. And people immediately jumped on it, the screenshot spreading all over twitter.

Tennis Channel’s table of commentators once referenced you after discussing the tennis rankings and Jannik’s consistent performance.

“How does he do it?” One asked, after running through Jannik’s match statistics and win streak.

“I’m not sure, but I doubt he’d say.”

“We gotta get [Your Name] to ask, then I’m sure he’ll tell all.” Another chimed in.

Everyone at the table laughed, very obviously understanding the context. “It’s true, it’s true.”

And, of course, that clip was everywhere within minutes of it airing, as well.

...But the kick of it all was that neither of you ever seemed to deny the rumors—no matter how many times they were thrown at your face…

It wasn’t like anyone was subtle about it.

---

Once, Frances Tiafoe, never one to pass up the chance for a joke, had been sitting in the player locker lounge when Jannik walked in after a win. 

“The match was tough,” He said as he briefly looked up from his phone to clap Jannik’s hand in congratulations. Then Frances smiled to himself before tacking on a cheeky line for the room to hear. “I’m sure the extra motivation helped… Knowing you’d get your favorite interviewer after, and all that."

Frances immediately seized with laughter, cracking himself up, and others around chuckled with equal enjoyment.

Jannik only shook his head as he made his way to the stationary bikes, smiling at Tiafoe’s antics, but he was mostly unfazed. He didn’t bother to give a response—no denial, not even much overt amusement—just that calm, neutral reaction. Masterfully deflecting without a single word.

It was the response he always gave when people brought it up, behind closed doors or otherwise.

Like when John McEnroe playfully called Jannik out on camera during a post-match interview after a Grand Slams quarterfinals. When Jannik approached the court again after winning, waving at the stands, it was McEnroe waiting to ask questions, mic in hand. 

The crowd still listened and cheered throughout the interview, hanging on to all of Jannik’s words, but it was nothing compared to the reactions your interviews always prompted.

McEnroe decided to bring you up towards the end of his questions, dramatically sighing and shaking his head. "Alright, thanks for humoring me Jannik—Sorry it’s me today and not your favorite commentator."

The audience roared at your mention, but Jannik only exhaled a laugh, catching one of his ankles in his hands to stretch as he simply shook his head. 

And McEnroe took Jannik’s lack of response as an answer. "Won’t even deny it, huh?"

Jannik just smiled, eyes drifting off to his box, and McEnroe took the action as reason to continue. Looking towards the camera in exaggerated belief, he threw his hands up, “And now he’s looking away from me—Wow, I can’t even keep his attention.”

Jannik laughed at that, placing a friendly hand on McEnroe’s shoulder. “No, I just—I saw my team say something so I looked over.”

“Right, right.” McEnroe kept on with his lamenting, teasing at the point further. “I was only the World Number One for a bit, won 70 titles…”

“I think—I think we go back to the questions, maybe.” Jannik said jokingly and McEnroe let out one more incredulous laugh. 

“Okay, I’ll try… but I’m starting to doubt if I’m any good at that now…”

“I have no favorite.” Jannik finally offered, his voice faint as the mic was still pointed away from him.

“Too late, Jannik, it’s too late.” 

The moment was all in jest, and John was sure to relay the interaction back to you later that day, as if you hadn't already watched it unfold live. You only laughed in response, teasingly placating him but never touching on what he’d suggested in the interview. McEnroe was just one of many peers in the sports broadcasting world that would make little comments to you, and you never gave them much of anything.

It was harder when players called you out though—especially when they did it live, in front of thousands of people.

Fresh off a hard-fought win, Matteo was still slightly out of breath when you grinned at him for the interview. "Matteo, great tennis out there today! We’ve been seeing you play at the net a lot more since your return—more confident, more aggressive with those volleys—tell us about that."

"No, no, I think I've always felt comfortable at the net.” He shook his head immediately, ducking his head down to really look at you, teasing glint in his eyes. “Maybe you’re too young to know my earlier game… or maybe you’re getting me confused with someone else."

The crowd already latched on to the reference, a collective ooh passing through the stands, you tried your best to play dumb despite that. You went the first reason he offered,  "I mean I remember watching your games before I got on the job, but if I blocked out memories of volleys like today’s, then no one’s more sorry than I am."

Matteo smirked, looking out toward the crowd, not letting you change the subject or take the easy way out. "I know we’re both Italian, but come on."

You allowed a laugh, but were quick to move on, not lingering on Matteo’s implication very long.

The exchange had made the highlight reels, fans eating up both Matteo’s teasing and your barely-there reaction, and the way you had to abruptly ask the next question to avoid it from dragging on too long.

But the teasing, the compilations, the endless speculation—it was all fun, all harmless. Because as far as anyone knew, it was just a fan theory. Just playful banter and an easy chemistry that everyone got to bear witness to. And, if yours and Jannik’s response to all the teasing was anything to go by, it really was just baseless guess work—after all, neither of you had ever given concrete proof on any of it.

But most continued to entertain it anyways, because if it was true: it was only a matter of time before it came out…

---

The long-awaited proof came after an especially grueling match of Jannik’s.

The game had been absolutely brutal.

It was one of those that felt less like a tennis match and more like a battle of sheer will. Four and a half hours in the sweltering heat, the air thick and unmoving, turning every rally into a war of attrition. Jannik had fought through service games that stretched over ten minutes, through back-to-back tie-breaks where every point had felt like a match in itself. He had been pushed to his limits, his legs leaden, his body aching from the relentless pace. Every time it seemed like he had finally broken free, his opponent clawed back, forcing another hold, another deuce, another impossibly long rally. 

By the final set, even his renowned movements had lost their usual crispness, his footwork a fraction slower, his serves just a little less sharp. But he refused to let up.

So when he finally won—when the last point ended and his opponent’s shot sailed long—it took him a second to process it. It took a second for everyone watching, too.

He barely lifted his arms in victory, letting his head drop as he panted. The stadium erupted around him, the crowd on their feet, but it seemed that all he could think about was how his entire body felt like it had been wrung out. He made his way to the net, movements heavy but thoughtful in his handshake and hug as he offered a good game to the opponent that matched and elevated his level throughout the game. Then trudging toward his bench with a nod to the umpire, shoulders still rising and falling with every exhausted breath.

The play had tested endurance more than anything—over four hours under the blazing afternoon sun, and no easy points. He held his face into his towel for a long moment, and then flicked water from his bottle over his face and on the back of his neck, his usual expression one of raw exhaustion. 

He barely had enough left in him to toss a fist into the air when he made his way back onto the court, though the crowd had yet to cease their cheering. And then he all but stumbled his way over to you.

You. Waiting just off the service line, a steady presence in the chaos, a welcome face after the intense match.

And the familiarity of it, of you, cut through his exhaustion. Your expression was still pleasant, but it was different from the smile you usually had during interviews. There was something tight under your professional exterior—concern, maybe subtle, but unmistakable once anyone saw it. It was in the way your eyes flickered over him, assessing, before you even said a word.

And still, as he approached, his gaze softened—as it always did when his eyes landed on you. But his face was flushed from the heat, sweat dampening the curls at the nape of his neck, so as he stepped closer, you instinctively reached up, fingertips brushing against his arm before you pulled back.

Maybe people would pick up the small gesture later, but for now the stadium was still roaring, the energy crackling through the stands. You hadn’t moved to begin the interview yet, your crew still assembling beside you.

He gave you the slightest of nods, eyelids low and heavy. You held his eyes, raising a single brow, before giving the go-ahead to the production assistant. And then the mic was live, and you fell into interview mode.

Or you tried to, as best as you could.

"Jannik—what can I even say? That was a battle out there," you started. "I know you love tennis, but a part of you has to hate it at least a little right now. I mean, congratulations for sure, but are you regretting any life decisions?"

His head was down for most of your intro, chin tucked to his chest as he rolled out his ankles and looked at you through the brim of his cap. He smiled, despite himself—he could always count on you to keep the mood high.

“What do you mean? That was the most fun I’ve had in my life.” His voice was a little labored, but he managed to answer lightly.

“The scary part is, I believe you.” The crowd laughed. “I think we can all agree, watching that match was the most fun any tennis fan could have. Honestly.”

You had to raise your volume towards the end of your praise as the audience joined in to cheer in agreement. It really had been an incredible display of the sport.

The stands then erupted into a joint song, all chanting his name in unison. You dropped the mic as he stepped back to humbly receive the attention, and he looked up at the people while you looked up at him.

You held the mic back to him after the chants subsided, knowing his next move would be to thank the crowd. “Thank you everyone for supporting. It really is an incredible thing to play such tennis with this amazing crowd—it’s very special. Thank you!”

He waved up at everyone for a moment longer before returning his attention back to you. You were waiting patiently, watching him with a tender smile. 

“We should probably be grateful that even such a taxing match could only make you love tennis more.” You restarted, picking back up from your initial question. “I don’t know if the sport could take it if that wasn’t the case.”

“No, I will be honest—” Jannik interjected, and you tilted the mic to him so it could catch his voice properly. “I will be honest. Right now I feel good, tired, but good. But maybe tomorrow, when I wake up, my legs will be sore and this kind of things… and then I might hate tennis—just a little bit. I will still be happy, but…”

“Wow, thank you for the honesty.” You laughed at the confession. “But even then, you say hate but it’s probably just like a ‘minus one’, right?”

“That’s true, 'minus one' on a scale of ten.”

“So where do you usually rank tennis, when you're not terribly sore? On a scale of ten?”

“... At least 11, maybe higher.” He said grinning, proud of the answer.

“So, we’re right back where we started then.” You threw up your hands in fake exasperation. “I’m trying to make you look bad here, at least help me a little.”

He shrugged and continued to smile at you, and you shook your head before moving the interview along. “In two days, hopefully after recovering from any remaining soreness, you’ll face off with De Minaur. He’s been playing really well throughout the tournament, how do you plan to approach that?”

He nodded thoughtfully, as he shifted to stretch his legs. It seemed that his adrenaline had faded again, along with the banter and the peak of the crowd’s celebration. The tension of exhaustion furrowed his eyebrows once more as his smile lessened while he took a moment to deliberate an answer. 

“Alex and I are good friends, we practice together often and he’s a great player. I look forward to playing him in the finals. And hopefully, we can make a good match like today.”

You cast a glance at your production assistant, who signaled that you still had half the allotted session for the interview left, before nodding at Jannik’s answer. You decided to use up the bulk of the remaining time yourself, to help take the weight of Jannik a bit, and so you let your next question have a long and wordy lead up.

“You and Alex go way back. You kind of made your breakthrough a little after his, winning the ATP Next Gen tournament against him soon after he broached the top 20. You’ve kind of revolved near each other since then—you practice together often, like you mentioned—and it seems you and him often make big evolutions for your respective careers in and around the same tournaments.” You droned on, stalling an actual ask of any question, and you hoped no one took notice.

His face was strained, though his eyes were still on you—even though you hoped to cover your intent naturally, it seemed Jannik had caught on to your attempt to alleviate the need for him to use any further brain power. You could tell he’d switched off from listening because of it, now focusing on his body. You continued to string together facts in the background, trying to catalog Jannik’s state as you did. 

Within the minute and half you spoke, it seemed he couldn’t help fidget in all his fatigue. He flexed his right wrist once. And lifted one heel, and then the other. Rolling his shoulders back four times and then forward three times. He hit the heel of his palm against his quads, once, then once more. And his fingers twitched, rubbing absently at the sorest spots—digging into the tender muscle of his forearm, kneading at the base of his neck. 

Every shift in position came with the faintest grimace, something only you could catch in your proximity to him. In all your closeness to him.

Then Jannik parted his mouth every so slightly, a quiet exhale leaving him as he did. He shifted his jaw side to side in a slow, stiff motion, testing the tension held there before it clicked with a faint pop. And, words on autopilot, you forgot yourself.

You kept speaking, though the spiel was probably well past erring on excessive, but you unconsciously reached a hand up. Your palm settled on the side of his face, index on the bone behind his ear, thumb on hinge of his jaw. Your fingers nestled under the hair at the nape of his neck as you gently rubbed your thumb back and forth. 

It was a simple, almost thoughtless action. An instinct, an undeniably intimate one. And then, before you could move to pull away, he caught your hand in his.

He lifted it ever so slightly, so your palm rested on his cheek, and he pressed his own hand into yours as he leaned his face into your touch. 

The gesture was effortless, organic, like he had done it a hundred times before. Like he needed it then.

He sighed and his eyes flickered closed. His thumb brushed against the back of your hand, and he didn’t let go immediately. And when he did open his eyes, his expression softened just slightly as he glanced at you, as if all his strain melted away with your warmth.  

The whole display happened within just a handful of seconds, but it was like the stadium fell still. And it might have just been the moment between you, but as you slipped your hand back to your side from underneath his, it really did feel like the entirety of the crowd was holding their breath.

You had trailed off somewhere in your monologue, and you couldn’t be sure of where, but you didn’t dare risk a look at the camera or towards your crew. The audience came alive again, murmurs rippling through the stands.

Jannik ran a hand over his face, taking only a beat to reset and set his attention back to the interview, looking as collected as ever. You tried to follow suit and compose yourself, finally asking the last question. "So, how do you plan to go into the match with Alex?"

You resisted smacking your hand to your face as soon as you said it. That might as well have been the exact question you’d asked earlier—it basically was—and it was far from the natural recovery you’d wanted. But Jannik, to his credit, took the redundant ask in stride and mixed up his response from his last one.

“Alex has kind of this defensive playing style that matches well with mine, and, of course, he’s fast and has the ability to return every ball. I’ve seen him grow and develop into an even better player in the past few years… so, it will be a very tough match—but, we’ll see.”

“Yes, we will!” You tried not to slump in relief when you caught the times-up signal in your periphery, and faked the best, most enthusiastic camera voice you could muster. “Thank you, Jannik, and good luck!”

You avoided his eyes, and the lens of the camera, and he smirked a little at that as he waved once more to the crowd before walking back to his bag. You allowed a single glance back when he moved to the tunnel after signing some autographs, and he was already looking towards you. His smile was small and teasing, and you could see the mirth in his eyes even from your distance. You shook your head at his expression, just enough for him to see—he should’ve been more scared.

Because you both were in for it. It was all out now.

---

The internet lost its mind.

For a year—two, even—everyone had speculated. The entirety of the tennis world.

They analyzed every glance, every subtle moment, every clipped interaction, convinced there was something there. And now? There was no denying it.

What you both pulled in that last interview couldn’t be faked, it couldn’t be rationalized. This wasn’t playful banter or a viral compilation of smirks and long-held eye contact. This was something neither of you could explain away. It was intrinsic. Reflexive intimacy, something was too practiced, too familiar.

It was proof.

Slow-motion replays were everywhere even before you ended the interview. The reception flooded all social media platforms.

Okay that wasn’t just chemistry. That was straight-up muscle memory. This whole time??? This WHOLE time?? I KNEW IT. I KNEW IT. Guys we called it

Tennis journalists tried to stay professional, but even the most formal accounts posted some variation of "well, this is interesting… "

And the fan posts were endless. Someone strung together a complete timeline of your relationship, tracing back all the way to when you started your role. Another person edited a fake wedding invite. 

And the players—the players…

When Jannik walked into the gym to cool down, it was like stepping into an ambush. All eyes were on him.

Everyone behind the scenes has stopped in their tracks to watch the legendary game of his that had just gone down. And so, everyone behind the scenes also witnessed your accidental reveal. The confirmation.

Every congratulations he received was immediately followed up with some sort of reference to it.

“Great game,” Alex De Minuar said. “...And, mate… the whole time?

"That game was insane, man…" Ben Shelton patted Jannik on the back as he passed, turning as he added. "And I guess now's as good a time as any… to hard launch I mean."

“No words, no words.” Carlos Alcaraz, from where he was stretching, shook his head up at Jannik in disbelief. “For that match, and for the reveal.”

Jannik chuckled a little with Carlos, shaking his head to himself as he moved deeper into the facility.

“I knew it so—” Coco just watched from a distance, her and Madi Keys stopping mid conversation when Jannik entered. "Like literally the whole time, I believed it."

"Niente da dire?" Nothing to say? Matteo drawled, clapping Jannik on the back with a smirk. "Neanche una spiegazioncine?" Not even a little explanation? 

And, around then, you’d made your way back to the commentary box, bracing yourself. You heard John McEnroe's voice from behind the door before you even entered. You couldn't help but cringe at the volume.

“Where is she?” The sound of a headset being placed down, with significant force. Laughter came from around him. “Where is she at?”

“Here we go.” You whispered to yourself.

---

Okay so, tell me, like for real, were you surprised? Did you know they were together all along, or did I get you? Because, I meant to get you, I did. Tell me where you realized, please please. It's okay if it wasn't a surpise, dw

Okay anyways, this was so fun. Too fun. Got carried away, in a lot of places, but I hope it's a fun read. Did not in fact edit, don't care, too long, didn't read—jk I'll go back in at some point soon. But if you're one of the lucky early few, read with one eye closed, and with the other mostly squinted.

Got almost all my favs in here, not nearly enough of the ladies, but my near-goat Ms. Coco has a cameo and what else really matters. What else really matters? And maybe, while reading, you were wondering: when is Jannik coming in? Does he ever? Well, I was wondering the same, okay...

K , kisses xx

[slvtfornegan]

“That another way of yours to thank me?”

Warnings: smut, a small fight, swearing, (s10 Negan)

Notes: idk how i feel about this one, it’s kinda rushed, i js wanted to post something. Also i wanted to write Negan more sub but I’ll leave that for another time.

—

The night air was cool against your skin, carrying the scent of damp earth and the faint, lingering smoke from someone’s late-night fire. The ground beneath your feet was uneven, soft from the earlier rain, and the distant hoot of an owl echoed in the trees just beyond Alexandria’s walls. Most of the town was asleep by now, save for a few guards on patrol. You should’ve been in your house too, enjoying some peace and quiet—but Jesse had made that impossible.

You kept your back against the wooden side of a tool shed, listening.

Footsteps. Slow, deliberate.

Damn it.

You had been avoiding him all day. Jesse had taken an interest in you a while ago, and no matter how many times you brushed him off, he just didn’t get it. He followed you around like a lost puppy, flashing that same eager smile, acting like the world hadn’t gone to complete shit. It was exhausting. Annoying.

And tonight? It was flat-out creepy.

He’d seen you leave the main street, and like clockwork, he’d started following you. Again.

You weren’t scared of him—just frustrated, irritated that you even had to hide in the first place. If he’d been some asshole trying to hurt you, that would’ve been simple. But Jesse wasn’t a threat. He was just persistent. Too damn persistent.

You shifted your weight, preparing to move toward the alley that ran behind the houses, when you stepped back—right into something solid.

Someone.

A firm hand caught your shoulder, keeping you from stumbling. Your heart jumped into your throat as you turned sharply, ready to shove whoever it was.

Then you saw him.

Negan.

Even in the dim light, you could see the familiar smirk tugging at the corner of his mouth his eyebrows raised up in his forehead.

A familiar chuckle rumbled against you.

“Shit. Didn’t know I was in the fuckin’ way.”

It had been months since he was let out of that cell, and people still treated him like a caged animal, watching, waiting for him to snap. But you had never really been part of that crowd. Yeah, you knew what he’d done. Hell, everyone did. But he wasn’t just that guy anymore. And you couldn’t bring yourself to hate him, not entirely. There were a glances, a few teasing comments, sometimes a wink from the distance, thrown in your direction that made you smile.

You took a step back, clearing your throat. “Sorry. I didn’t see you.”

“No shit,” he said, raising a brow. “Damn near knocked me on my ass.” His eyes flicked over your shoulder. “You look like you saw a ghost, or somethin’ worse.”

You hesitated, then exhaled through your nose, deciding it wasn’t worth hiding. “Jesse.”

Negan let out a low hum, tilting his head. “The kid with the stupid haircut?”

Despite yourself, a small amused snort escaped.

Negan grinned. “Figured. He’s been sniffin’ around you like a damn bloodhound.”

You groaned, crossing your arms. “Tell me about it.”

For a moment, neither of you spoke. The distant murmur of crickets filled the silence, and the flickering streetlights cast long shadows across the road.

Negan studied you, eyes sharp despite the lazy grin still lingering on his face. You knew what he was thinking—why the hell were you standing here, talking to him?

You weren’t sure how to answer that.

There were a lot of things about Negan that should’ve made you stay away. The past. The things he’d done. The lives he had taken.

And yet...

He wasn’t all bad.

People liked to paint him as a monster, as if that was all he’d ever been, but you had seen the cracks in that image. The way he’d helped Judith. The way he had stayed, even when he could have run. The way he looked at you now—not as someone beneath him, but as someone worth listening to.

And you’d be damned if you didn’t catch yourself checking him out more than once. He was older than you, yet he looked good. Too damn good you’d say.

But you’d never make a move though. You were too much of a pussy. You were scared about what people would think if they saw you making hearts eyes at Negan. People in Alexandria weren’t the ones to forget easily.

You sighed shaking the thought away. “He won’t take ‘no’ for an answer. It’s pissing me the fuck off.” You saw his expression shift into something more serious. He understood.

You crossed your arms. “If I have to tell him one more time, I swear—”

“There you are.”

The sound of Jesse’s voice made your stomach twist. You turned just in time to see him step out from between two houses, his silhouette cutting against the dim glow of a porchlight. His eyes flicked to Negan, his lips twitching like he wasn’t sure whether to be annoyed or amused.

“What’s this?” Jesse asked, stepping closer. “Didn’t know you and him were friends.”

You exhaled through your nose and stepped forward. “Jesse, go home.”

Jesse’s smile didn’t budge. If anything, it got wider, but there was something mean curling at the edges now. “Come on, don’t be like that,” he said, like he was the victim here. “I just wanted to talk. You’ve been dodging me all day.”

“For a reason.” You folded your arms, feeling your patience run out. “I don’t want to talk to you.”

Jesse’s smile thinned. His eyes flickered to Negan, and something in them darkened, like he was sizing up a threat. Which was stupid. Negan wasn’t even doing anything—yet. Just watching carefully.

“You got a problem, old man?” Jesse finally said, turning his full attention on him and moved closer.

Negan lifted a brow, tilting his head slightly. “Old man? Shit, kid, you got a death wish?”

Negan gave him a slow, deliberate once-over. “In the matter of fact i do have a fucking problem. Y’know, I don’t usually waste my time on little pricks with Napoleon complexes, but you’re really pushin’ it. The lady said no, so why don’t you skedaddle?”

Fuck he really didn’t want to cause trouble, he just got out of that freaking cell, but this asshole was asking for it. And to be truthful, Jesse wasn’t the only one sniffing around Y/n. Thought he’d never made a move. He didn’t want to cross that thin line because it could’ve burned him.

Jesse scoffed, puffing out his chest like he actually had something to prove. “Yeah? You’re gonna do something about it?”

“I just might.” Negan drawled lowly

This situation was getting ridiculous. That wouldn’t bring to nothing good, might even get Negan in trouble after.

“You two done measuring who’s balls are bigger? Jesse just go.”

“No no,” he waved his hand in the air dramatically “If gramps wanna prove a point here, let him do it.”

Negan let out a low chuckle shaking his head.

You blinked and It happened.

Negan swung first.

The punch cracked across Jesse’s jaw, snapping his head to the side. He staggered, but he recovered quick, launching himself at Negan with a snarl. The two of them collided hard, boots scraping against the dirt as they grappled. Jesse was younger, maybe even faster, but that didn’t stop Negan anyway.

“No stop it!” You yelled

But none of them morons listened. You watched as he twisted, using Jesse’s own momentum against him, slamming him into the side of the tool shed with a heavy thud. Jesse grunted, throwing a punch that clipped Negan’s jaw his head jerking to the side.

The men were caught in a fight of fists and kicks trying to knock each other on the ground.

You groaned. “Are you two actually serious right now?”

You had to end this before it attracted people’s attention.

You grabbed at Jesse’s shirt pulling him away from Negan and pushed him away, making Jesse stumble a few feet back.

“Stop!” You shoved Negan’s chest, not hard, just enough to make him step back. Negan ran his tongue over the inside of his cheek, tasting the blood on his tongue, a smug look on his face as he looked over Jesse. You stayed at Negan’s side also breathing heavily. “I’m telling you one more time to leave, before I personally will kick your ass.” You hissed

Jesse wiped at his mouth, breathing hard. His eyes burned with anger, but there was something else too—humiliation. He’d lost, and he knew it.

“You really chose to hang around with him?” Jesse spat, glaring between the two of you.

He clenched his fists, jaw tightening like he wanted to say something, but he thought better of it. With one last sharp glare at you, he turned and stalked off, disappearing into the night.

You let out a slow breath, tension draining from your shoulders. “Fucking finally.”

Negan let out a low grunt, rubbing his jaw where Jesse’s punch had landed. “Little shit’s got a mean right hook. Weak as hell, but gotta give him credit for effort.”

You shot him a look. “Oh, yeah? You want me to call him back so you two can go another round?”

Negan smirked. “Nah, sweetheart. ‘Less you’re offerin’ to nurse me back to health.” His brows waggled playfully. “Got a soft touch, do ya?”

You rolled your eyes, but truth be told, he did look like he needed something for that bruised cheek. You sighed. “Come on. Let’s get you some ice before your face swells up.”

Negan blinked, then let out a short laugh. “You serious?”

“Yeah.” You turned, leading the way toward your house. “You helped me out. Least I can do.”

“Well, shit,” he muttered under his breath, following you. “Didn’t expect a goddamn reward.”

You made your way through the quiet streets of Alexandria, the houses standing still and silent under the dim glow of streetlights. Most people were asleep by now, save for the occasional guard patrolling the walls. The air smelled of damp wood and earth, a reminder of the earlier rain. Your footsteps were soft against the dirt path, and Negan walked just behind you, his presence oddly steady.

Your house was on the smaller side, tucked away near the edge of the community. When you stepped up onto the porch and unlocked the door, Negan let out a low whistle. “Nice place.”

You flicked on a lantern, casting a warm glow over the space. It wasn’t much, but it was cozy—worn wooden floors, a couch, with a coffee table, a big book shelf. A few personal touches here and there. It wasn’t one of the biggest houses in Alexandria, but you lived alone so it was enough for you.

He plopped down onto the couch with a satisfied groan, stretching his legs out.

You wrapped some ice in a cloth, shaking your head as you walked back to the living room. Negan was sprawled out on your couch like he owned the damn place, one arm draped over the back, his long legs stretched out. He had that cocky smirk on his lips.

Asshole. He was definitely been staring at your ass.

You sat next to him, tilting his chin with your free hand and pressing the ice pack to his cheek without warning.

“Shit—” he hissed through his teeth. “Be gentle woman, i’m wounded.” He pouted softly in a joking manner and you rolled your eyes.

Carefully, you adjusted the ice, holding it steady against his bruised cheek. You hadn’t even realized how gentle you were being with him—how your fingers weren’t just holding the ice, but brushing lightly against his skin, how you weren’t pulling away even though you probably should’ve.

Your eyes trailed his features from up close. Fuck why did he have to look this good? Those dark eyes, the gray stubble that covered his chiseled jaw and the greying hair. The dimple lines under his beard complimenting his face.

Negan noticed.

His smirk faded slightly, his gaze darkening as it flickered between your eyes and your mouth.

You noticed that. Trying to ignore the heat increasing in your body from his intense gaze you broke the silence “thank you though… it was idiotic, but at least i got rid of Jesse for a while.” You murmured.

“You don’t have to thank me doll. Didn’t know I was gettin’ a reward, though. Gotta say… I like this part.” His voice dipped lower, rich with something you didn’t want to put a name to.

You swallowed, but didn’t pull away.

His smirk deepened, but his expression wasn’t just cocky—it was searching, reading between the lines. He always did that, looking at people like he could see right through them. And right now? He was seeing through you.

“You’re real fuckin’ soft for me, huh?” he murmured, tilting his head just slightly.

What were you supposed to say? Your eyes found his and for a moment you froze.

Negan’s smirk disappeared entirely, his lips parting slightly. He didn’t pull away—didn’t tease, didn’t throw out another crude joke. He just sat there, waiting, letting you make the choice.

And hell, you made it.

Your lips met his, slow at first—uncertain. But Negan? He wasn’t the uncertain type.

A low sound rumbled from his chest, and suddenly his hand was at the back of your neck, pulling you in like he’d been waiting for this just as much as you had. His lips moved against yours, rough but deliberate, like he wanted to take his time.

And you? You melted into it, the ice in your hands long forgotten and dropped on the floor, your hands moving to cup his face.

He pulled away after a moment looking at you through hooded eyes “That another way of yours to thank me?” His tone was huskier than usual .

“Can you just shut the hell up for a moment?” You asked breathlessly

He smirked “ yes ma’am.” He murmured before his lips claimed yours again.

Your fingers curled into his navy blue shirt, pulling him closer without even realizing it. The heat of his body was solid against yours, his scruff scratching your skin making a pleasant tingly feeling, as his lips moved against yours, slow but sure, deepening the kiss just enough to make your stomach flip.

You leaned in, your hand moved to his hair, and the other one slid down his body. Negan made a low noise in his throat, and the hand on your neck slid down to your waist, fingers pressing against your hip dragging you onto his lap.

You obliged, straddling him, the room feeling with your soft sighs and the most delicious wet nosies of your lips moving against each others.

You could feel him reacting to your touch, his erection pressing against your ass and you couldn’t help but grind against him trying to cause at least some friction.

The motion made him whimper in your mouth, as he broke the kiss to look at your face, his pupils blown with lust, his brows furrowed, all panting and wanting, aching with need.

The look on his face made you moan, a low breathless sound. And the sound made him twitch under you. Your lips nipped gently at his neck, kissing up his throat, making his head fall back with a low groan escaping from his lips.

His hands rested on your thighs gripping harder than before as he spoke his voice low and rough “You’re making it real hard to behave myself here, doll..” in a swift motion he was on top of you, his lips attached to your your skin, as you both tried to get rid of your clothes.

He was more eager than he intended, but years being locked up and now having such a pretty thing underneath him, acting so needy for him, was driving him mad.

Your shirt was now on the floor so was his. Swiftly he undid the zipper of your jeans and pulled them aside leaving you only in your underwear. He ran his hands ran up you legs, feeling the smoothness of your skin. His touch gentle making goosebumps raise all over your body.

“Fuck look at you…” he breathed out, taking you in, laid down beneath him “so fucking beautiful..”

You had a moment to admire him too, his tattoo covered skin, chest arms, the slim yet muscular body, the v line with a happy trail that leaded right in his boxers, before he dipped his head down his lips attaching to your neck again, his beard scraping your soft skin.

His hands moved up your inner thighs, his touch making you tremble slightly under him, your hips bucking up involuntarily. He pushed your panties aside His eyes gazed over the curves of your form, your glistening cunt ready for him. his fingers finding your slick folds and he moaned lowly at the wetness between your legs.

“So wet f’me.” his fingers traced along the delicate skin of your pussy, collecting the slick on his thick, your back arching your hips pushing up to press against his calloused fingers- then bringing them up to his mouth to taste your arousal with a satisfied hum.

“Negan…” you panted “don’t tease.”

“Patience is a fucking virtue.” He teased before with one hand he reached down in his boxers freeing his hard cock, the tip pressing against your entrance making both of you moan.

“Yeah and you’re so fucking vice. Just fuck me already!” You hissed nudging your heel against his ass. But you knew he wanted to tease you more. He chuckled lowly but let out a low curse as you grabbed his shoulders and switched the position, pushing him down onto the couch, making him grunt in surprise his back hitting the cushions.

“Bossy are we?” He teased.

Slowly, you began to sink down onto him, your slick folds parting around his thick shaft. You gasped softly at the stretch, your inner walls clenching and fluttering around his length.

“Fuck..” he sighed as he heard the sweet sounds of your voice, his hips moving in a steady peace giving you time to adjust.

You followed that rhythm, gradually increasing your pace but never bouncing up and down on him. You wanted him to relish in each movement as you rode him, wanted to hear his pleasure.

As if Negan doesn’t feel cocky enough, the mere sight of you riding him makes him even more emboldened. Bringing eyes veiled with lust back to you, he reached around to grasp your ass, guiding your movements. “That’s it baby, you feel so fucking good.” He praised “fuck you’ll be the death of me, at least I’ll enjoy every second of it.”

He watched as your breasts bounced with each thrust. Your mouth agape, your eyes half-linded and skin flushed. It was a sight worth to die for.

But the peace you set was driving him mad, he wanted more.

He sat up, switching the position once more, before he slammed back into you. As your walls enveloped him completely, his head buried in the crook of your neck.

Those sounds coming out of your mouth didn’t seem to belong to you. You whimpered and moaned with every thrust. He filled you perfectly, fucked you perfectly. He was rough but not too rough for your taste, looking at you with adoration, hunger and possession combined.

His low hoarse voice in your ear, saying how good you were for him, how perfect and beautiful and all kind of praises between low grunts and pants feeling how his words affected you as you clenched around him.

“Cmon baby, let go for me.” He panted, his lips nipping at your skin moving down to your breast sucking on it, and feeling you arch.

“Yes—God!” Was the only thing you could gasp out. Your head fell back, his name slipping past your lips as he fucked you through your orgasm, his own release following immediately after his hips coming to a stop as he filled her up.

He looked down at you a lazy smile stretched on his lips, and let out a content sigh as he pulled out. He stole a small kiss from you and gave your bare ass a slight pinch making you whimper in his mouth before, he slumped down on the couch next to you careful not crash you. His arm snuck around your waist pulling you against him

“Well that was fucking amazing.” He grinned lazily, turning to look at you as you rested your head on his chest, your fingers tracing his skin.

The quiet of the room was now broken only by the soft hum of your breathing. It was surreal—this whole situation felt like it shouldn’t be happening.

You rested your head on his chest, the rhythm of his breath calm, slow. His hand rested gently on your waist, fingers tracing lazy patterns on your skin.

“You alright?” He murmured looking down at you.

“Mhmm..” you hummed once more, rolling on top of him with a smile you hand tracing his tattooed chest.

Negan chuckled, his chest vibrating beneath you. “Shit, if this is what I get for throwin’ one punch, I might have to start pickin’ more fights.”

You swatted at his side, rolling your eyes. “Don’t push your luck.”

Negan grinned, tilting his head slightly as he studied you. “Yeah? And here I thought you were startin’ to like havin’ me around. Or it was just it then? A pity fuck?” He joked arching a brow.

You let out a huff. “No.”

“Then it means you like me?” His grin stretched wider chasing your lips but you pulled away and threw him a half annoyed half amused glare but didn’t reply anything.

You stood up from the couch making him sigh dramatically, as he watched you move across the room, his eyes trailing your body and admired your bare ass from his laid position. He bit his lip at the view you were giving him.

You stopped in the doorway looking over your shoulder seeing how his gaze traveled your body hungrily, and you smirked.

“I’m gonna take a shower. Wanna join?” You threw him a sly look.

Shit, you were gonna be the death of him.

Negan’s eyes glinted with amusement, a wicked grin creeping up on his face. “Hell, I’m not one to turn down an invitation like that.”

[cozycryptidcorner]

post apocalyptic vampire/reader, pt 1

OLD PATREON STORY I FOUND WHILE DIGGING AROUND!!

“You’re holding her wrong.”

It’s all you can force your closing throat to say, the scent of blood and filth putrid in your nostrils. You can’t breathe, nor do you want to, if that somehow disturbs the creature clutching your infant daughter in its hands.

It looks up, ruby-red eyes narrow, like it cannot believe the fucking gall you have to interrupt such an intimate moment.

“You need to support her head.”

A silent, still moment passes, one where you urge your body not to move, every cell beneath your skin and teeth holding still at attention.

Then, like a prayer answered from god himself, the creature slowly shifts, moving his fingers up until the head of your baby is supported, easing the tension away from her airway and spine. You breathe a sigh of relief, and she sneezes, still asleep, not at all aware of the danger she is cradled in. Her lip puckers as her arms flail, only briefly, as though she could gain any sort of security in this current position.

The creature licks his teeth, all sharp and predatory, eyes downcast as he observes every little contour that your child takes up, from the dark hair upon her head to the swaddled feet that tend to kick away her blankets. One of your bunker neighbors whimpers, suddenly realizing that some of their limbs no longer belong to the rest of their body, but your eyes focus on the movement of this monster’s fingers.

After a period of reflection overstays its welcome, the creature finally says something. “Why did you run?”

You swallow thickly, palms against rusting metal. “Would you have believed me?”

No, the unspoken answer hangs heavy in the air. No, he would have ripped your throat out and drank from your arteries, drowning your unborn child, still so small, in your womb.

“You should have tried-”

“And risk everything?” You’re getting brave, an emotion almost beaten out of you as a teen. “Are you saying you would have waited until she was born to make the judgement?”

No, this monster has a temper. You don’t doubt it would have clutched your neck in its claws, angry tears running down its face, accusing you of crimes you never committed. You needed to run, so you did.

You don’t regret the six months away from the blood-bank camps.

He somehow understands this, so much better than you thought he would, rocking your baby back and forth. HIs baby, too, the monstrous voice in your head reminds your conscious, the miracle child of a living human and corpse.

“Julian,” you whisper, one last-ditch effort to plead your case. “There never was anyone else.”

The creature looks up, almost shocked, like he’s seeing you for the first time. Then, again, down at the little half-living baby in his embrace. You know he must sense something different with her, otherwise, he would have snapped her frail little neck in two the moment he laid hands on her. She’s alive because he can sense it, somehow, through scent or through sight. That’s… your only hope, your only reassurance that he will let you both live.

“Has it received a name, yet?” His voice is gruff, clogged, the most unsure of himself that you’ve heard.

“No.” She’s been out of you and breathing on her own for awhile, now, but you haven’t managed to narrow a name down.

He looks at her again, running his thumbs over her face. Her eyes open, her thickly disproportionate fingers reaching for his face.

“Julian,” you’re pleading now, and you don’t like that, not even for this situation, “the hunting party will be back soon. If they catch you here…”

“I’ll kill them,” he says, so very easily.

“And what of our child?” You prod, keeping your arms crossed around your wrists. “Can you fight a dozen soldiers and keep her safe without practice?”

That causes him to pause and think, brow furrowed, ruby-red eyes looking you up and down as though trying to figure out a threat level. But while his kind might be filled only with lust, anger, and violence, you’ve always found him… remarkably logical, even alongside those vices.

Best yet, he listens when wrong.

“Was there really no one else?” He asks, like he’s nothing more than a human boy, prodding for reassurance. As though he doesn’t have leagues of abominations at his beck and call.

You want to throttle him, but you tamper down the desire. Swallowing thickly, you hold your arms open, trying to appear as vulnerable as possible. “You can sense it, can’t you? This child is barely on the brink of living, like a piece of her calls from hell.”

He pauses for a moment before he stands, tall and dangerous, holding your baby out for you to take. Of course he can tell, why else would he spare her life? Trying not to seem too eager or concerned, you step over the pool of blood that separates you from him, clutching your baby close to your chest. After a moment with his head cocked to his side, he simply walks out of your provided bunker compartment, merely mumbling come, as some sort of order.

“Collect your things,” he says, almost generously. Like you have reason to thank him for granted you the permission necessary to collect your daughter’s clothes and diapers.

The carnage he left in his wake… it sickens you, but you try not to allow your eyes to dwell on a body for too long. This wasn’t the first human sanctuary you’ve sheltered with, nor do you think it will be your last, but you feel awful for the people to fall first to his wrath.

The air is thick with humidity, sharp and cold with a winter that has lasted for years. The sun barely pierces down from a thick haze of volcanic ash, so diluted that the father of your child prances about like his kind is the next to inherit the earth,

Carefully, as snow crunches beneath your boots, you wrap your baby in the scarf around your neck. The forest seems to swallow the shelter as you follow your beast into the forest, with only stripped, bare trees to witness your devotion.

For her.

[tinkerbellini21]

A Stranger's Jacket: Part 9

Evan "Buck" Buckley x plus size! reader

Word Count: 2.3k

Warnings: angst, comfort

Author's notes: I spent my first day of break at work, and I felt bad I didn't get this posted last night!

Masterlist | Taglist

Bobby arrived after giving his statement to the police. He looked absolutely shattered- bloodshot eyes, worry lines etched into his face. Hen had told you that Bobby saw Buck as a son, taking him under his wing. He didn’t say much, occasionally turning to talk to Athena. You hadn’t learned much about her yet— only that she was Bobby’s wife and a police sergeant— but this wasn’t the time nor the place for introductions. She wrapped an arm around his shoulders, rubbing his arm as she leaned her head against him. Like she was the glue holding him together, bending to fit around his slumped over figure. 

After Maddie had her meltdown, she was able to hold herself together- that was until she had made the call to her parents. She was not looking forward to it. She knew what their answer was going to be. Chimney had convinced her that they deserved to know that Buck was in the hospital. 

You understood her hesitation when she made the call. They weren’t coming. They would call when he was awake. Maddie was silent for a few beats. 

Then she let loose, years of hurt and frustration boiling over. And she did not hold back.

You couldn’t hear what they were saying, but Maddie wasn’t having it.

“Do you know how much this will hurt him? His own parents couldn’t even make it to see him. Scratch that, you aren’t even parents! My brother could have died, Phillip and Margaret, and you can’t take the time to come see him?”

She’d spat out their names, words seething with fire. They tried to speak but she cut them off, not wanting to hear anything else leave their lips.

“Don’t even worry about him. His family is here!” Maddie’s voice breaks with a high note..

You glanced up discreetly, no one daring to look directly at her. She paced along the wall, tearing into her parents. You noticed her pulling on the ends of her sleeve with her free hand, an anxious tick you know all too well.

“I’ll deal with his hurt, like always.”

The fabric stretches as she wraps it around her fist, bringing it to her side. Soon after, she started hitting her thigh, tears in her eyes. 

It’s silent, not even a muffled response through the phone. All of the white noise from the waiting room is seemingly gone. As if time had halted to a stop. 

“I hate you every time his face drops and he—” 

She paused as her voice broke with a hiccup. She takes a deep breath and pushes it out, not wanting to give them the satisfaction of hearing her own hurt.

You closed your eyes, that familiar ache settling in your bones. How could someone disregard their own son, much less someone as kind and loyal as Buck? Someone who yearned for his parent’s love and attention. 

“He deserves so much more. So you know what Mom and Dad?” A short pause, a breath of courage as she mocks them. “Fuck you.”

She hangs up before they can respond. Chimney doesn’t move. No one speaks.  Everyone is on the same page—Maddie needs space. 

She pressed her lips to her covered knuckles, turning to look out the window. Her chest rose with a deep breath, exhaling shakily.Her other arm, wrapped around her torso. She was trying to hold herself together. 

 She tried to make sure that everyone he loved was here. But she couldn’t do that. 

She couldn’t do anything but wait. 

And her heart was breaking. 

It was quiet again after that. You had opened up your phone to catch up on the news. When that got boring, you laid your head back against the wall with your eyes closed. Nurses were talking amongst themselves. You could hear the mechanical lock of a door being opened and then the sound of it shutting with a gentle thud.

Eddie volunteered to go on a food run after his stomach made a loud growl. You were adamant that you weren’t hungry, but he had still gotten you something to eat, that wasn’t a granola bar. You apologized again for your reaction earlier but he laid a hand on your shoulder, looked you in your eyes, and told you not to worry about it. With some gentle coaxing, he had managed to get you to eat a small bag of Cheez-Its.

With each small update that signaled Buck was stable, the waiting room crowd slowly dissipated. At one point, you were counting how many steps it took a person to come or go, the repetitive nature keeping your mind occupied from the negative thought. While some left on calls, others were eager to get out of the hospital, the place that typically meant something bad had happened.

The last update you remember was they were starting to repair the achilles tendon in his leg. That was around 10:45. You were still exhausted from your own trauma the previous week, and staying up this late was already a challenge. But you fought to stay awake. Or at least tried.

The first time you fell asleep, it wasn’t for long. You startled awake with a gasp, covered in cold sweat. You brought your hands to your head, taking even breaths to calm your racing heart. To ease the pounding in your ears.

The nightmare happened again, but with a different twist. This time, Dr. Daniel’s wasn’t on the floor. Buck was. You were so close to getting him into the office, but it was too late. Dead. Both of you. 

You could feel eyes on you. Whose? You weren’t sure. But you had an inkling it was Eddie. You take another deep breath. Your ankle starts to shake back and forth anxiously. 

“Nightmare?”

“Yeah.” 

You take another deep breath, now aware that Eddie is watching you. But it wasn’t uncomfortable. You didn’t feel alone. Nor did you feel pressured to tell him about it. 

 You dug your fingertips into the corner of your eyes to help slow the headache coming on. It was strange to think that just 24 hours ago, you were in bed with Buck who was fighting your nightmares off. 

“I used to get them badly after Afghanistan.” Eddie opens up, drumming his fingers on his thigh. “Therapy helped a lot. I journaled for a bit, and it was surprisingly useful. It gave me things to remember to talk about in therapy. And getting it out of your head, and onto paper—it makes it easier to process.”

You let it sit out there for a moment. Would it be okay to talk about your trauma when he experienced far worse in Afghanistan? He had technically opened the door, but in comparison to you? 

Stop it. Stop comparing your trauma to others. You deserve your feelings, too. 

The words, a combination from your therapist and Buck, ring in the back of your head. You turn your body to face him, straightening up to present yourself as more open. 

“I haven’t had a real bad one until I went back to campus Monday, and saw Buck.”

“Yeah, I heard someone was your dream catcher last night.” Eddie teases, stretching his legs out. You let out a laugh, louder than you’d like to admit. 

“He called himself my knight in shining turnout gear.”

That gains the attention of a few others, who join in on the laughing. Even Bobby looks a little amused as he rolls an empty coffee cup in between his hands. 

“He’s Prince Charming for sure.” Athena chips in whilst walking back with another cup of coffee for Bobby. “Very endearing, wormed his way into my heart.”

“That was back when Buck stole fire trucks and slep-”

Hen shuts Chimney down fast.

“Nope, not here or now, Chim.”

The second time you fall asleep, you’re gently shaken awake. 

You blink your eyes open slowly. The white of the room is still blinding. You would think they’d dim it down for the night. The faint smell of coffee remains in the air. Your neck is stiff. You exhale sleepily, finding the strength to sit up and force your eyes open. Hen is standing above you.

“How long was I out?”

“A few hours.” 

“Mmhm, what time is it?”

“A little after four.” She responds, standing above you. “He’s out of surgery.”

You’re wide awake now. 

Buck is out. He’s okay.

“For how long?”

“About an hour. They let everyone see him briefly, and we didn’t want to wake you until everyone was done.”

You let out a breath you didn’t know were holding. Tension you were holding in your shoulders slowly starts to melt away.

“Can I see him?”

Hen nods, taking you up to the next floor to see Buck in the ICU. You feel stuck, but instead of unable to move, you want to run down the halls to see him. You don’t have any trouble moving once the elevator reaches the floor. However, the walk down the hall seems longer than it is. 

The room is dark, illuminated by the small light above the bed. The beeping of the heart monitor is steady, a light whoosh of oxygen filling the silence.

Maddie leans across the railing, fingers combing through Buck’s hair. He doesn’t stir.

His leg is held by a sling, cushioned by a pillow. Bandages cover his knee down to his ankle, holding him still. 

Your breath hitches in your throat. You reach for Hen’s arm to steady yourself without thinking. Holding you up when Buck can’t. 

“Oh Evan.” You whisper softly, tilting your head, a sad upturn of your lips settling in.

“He’ll be mostly out of it for the next few hours.” Maddie pauses, tilting her head to briefly look your way. You don’t miss the adoration on her face. “He ordered flowers and was going to bring you coffee and a granola bar for your first day of teaching. He was so proud of his plan.” 

You bite your lip, willing yourself not to cry.

God damn it, Buck. You told me you’d be safe. 

“I can go,” you offer, feet frozen in place. You bend your elbows, anxiously playing with your fingers. You don’t want to leave.Your mind is screaming at you to stay. But he’s not your family. 

“No.” She gives a firm shake of her head. “He’d want you here.” 

You don’t know if she’s just being nice. Or if she really wants you here. After today, you hope she does.

“Are you sure?”

You don’t want her to feel pressured to say yes.

“I am.” She motions to the empty seat. “Besides, they think you’re his girlfriend.”

Your heart stutters . Maddie told them you’re his girlfriend? 

“Sit down. I’ll walk Hen out, I have to use the restroom anyway.”

You glance up at Hen, who gives a smile. Courage to move. You carefully sit down.

“I’ll be right back.”

As soon as they leave, you reach over to grab his hand, careful not to disturb the IV. His hand is warm, and you carefully wrap your hand around his fingers. . 

You lose yourself in your thoughts. Or maybe you’re just groggy, because you actually aren’t thinking. You’re zoned out. 

You feel like a muscle has moved in his hand. You look down for a few seconds, seeing nothing. You’re imagining things.

Your eyes drift down to his leg, which is bandaged and being held together with pins. After a whole truck fell ontop of him, you were surprised that they didn’t have to amputate his leg. It’s a miracle they were even able to save his leg. 

“Ow.”

Your brows furrow together. Are you hearing things now? 

A low, pained groan gets your attention. Buck’s lashes flutter, eyes fighting to stay open. He barely lifts his head, seeing his leg wrapped up. His face drops in devastation. 

Then he spots you, his eyes lighting up. 

You push yourself up, fingers tightening around his hand as he squeezes back, warm and strong. 

“Hey, don’t move, okay? I’ll get a nurse.” 

“Wait.”

He’s groggy, his voice soft, slow. You keep a hold of his hand, watching him. You stay quiet. Let him take this all in. The dark room. The beeping of machines. The pain. His blue orbs are glossy, confused. It’d be cute if he wasn’t almost crushed to death by a firetruck.

“I tried.”

“I know.” You let go of his hand. Your hands are shaking, nervous at the idea of jolting him wrong and causing him pain. Your fingers lightly graze the skin of his cheek, and when he 

shows no signs of being hurt, you gently lay your palms on his face. You rub your fingers up and down his jawline. He lets his eyes shut. “I heard you asked about me.”

“Mhmm, I did.” Except it comes out as more of a question. It sounds like something he’d do, but he likely doesn’t remember it. You laugh softly, a tear rolling down your cheek. You quickly reach up to wipe it away.

“Kiss me.”

His eyes are open again. With a bite of your lip, your eyes flutter shut. It wouldn’t be right for you to kiss him. Not in this state. He’s still coming out of anesthesia.

“Here.” You lean forward to press a kiss to his forehead. Your lips linger, and he leans into your touch. “Ask me again later, okay?”

“Mmmkay.”

“Rest. Maddie will be back soon. She’s going to be so happy that you’re awake.”

A long pause of silence. You sit back down, hand returning to him. He firmly holds onto your hand, and you rub your thumb soothingly across his palm.

“Y/N.”

“Evan.”

“Thank you.”

You think back to earlier, Maddie pacing the length of the waiting room, doing her best to stay cool until she exploded. Maybe, deep in his mind, he knows that his parents aren’t coming. You swallow hard, leaning forward to stroke his cheek. 

“I’ll always be here, Evan.”

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

🔥 taglist: @nickie-amore, @mimisweetz

[xuchiya]

Young Gen Love || jeong yunho || 800 follower special

| genre: fluff. slice of life. slow-burn-ish | mentions: nothing much. just a little anxiety but it is more of yunho being a gentleman.

thank you all so much, my loves! My journey here in this platform has been amazing, met a lot and lots of my loves! 🤍🥹

January 16, 2025

It was my first day on my night classes that my mom told me to apply to since it coordinates with my chosen course in college. I walk in the computer classroom, greeting everyone and the professor, I sat at the back and settle my bag down. Night classes always had a different kind of energy—dimly lit hallways, the hum of fluorescent lights, and the quiet murmur of students trying to absorb the lessons after an already long day.

I scanned my surroundings. Most of my classmates were older—some around my parents’ age, others even older. They were here to learn the basics of computers, eager but sometimes struggling with the difference between software and hardware. I admired their determination, but at the same time, a small disappointment settled in my chest.

There was no one my age. And it would be fun having someone close or older or younger than me would be my classmate, I spun on my chair, turning on my designated computer.

Just as I resigned myself to being the odd one out, the door creaked open. A tall figure walked in, gripping the strap of his backpack. Brunette hair slightly tousled, sharp eyes taking in the room, a quiet but undeniable presence. Our professor gestured for him to introduce himself.

"I'm Jeong Yunho, I'm 24 and ..." he said, voice steady, but there was a hint of nervousness underneath. "I’m here to learn more about computers. I only have basic knowledge, so... please take care of me." He bows his head before moving towards his seat which was just on my right side.

My lips quirked up.

He was a few months younger than me—just a small gap—but enough to make me feel relieved. I wasn’t alone anymore.

For two weeks, we didn’t speak. We barely even acknowledged each other kudos to my stuttering and introverted personality, but slowly, the class dynamics shifted. People became more comfortable, more familiar. I started moving around, observing other groups engagin conversatoins with them and having few shared laughters, taking notes on how they configured the computers, absorbing techniques like a sponge.

One night, I found myself hovering near his table. He was struggling on one of the tasks. Yunho was focused, brows furrowed as he listened to our professor’s explanation, his hands hovering uncertainly over the keyboard. He was clearly still learning, still figuring things out, but he was determined.

He always came to face the same error for the past 5 minutes until he sighs, "I have to redo this again ..." I chuckle, pulling a chair beside him, "You just miss one step that's why you were facing this error ... let me help."

He glances at me before nodding. He followed my instructions, even explaining to him why it needs to apply or how it functions when applied. He nods as we finish the task, he sighs in relief, turning to me.

"You're good." Yunho compliments. I chuckle, waving off his compliment but that didn't stop my cheeks from burning.

"No I'm not. I barely started my task." He looks at my open computer then back to me. A playful look on his eyebrows, "Or you're just lying to me right now and finished hours ago."

I chuckle shaking my head, "Believe me, I haven't even open File explorer."

Somehow, without realizing it, we started spending more time together—small moments, like exchanging notes, grabbing snacks during breaks, or sharing casual stories. Weeks passed, turning into months, and something about him pulled me in.

And that's where I started to notice things.

February 13, 2025

The night air was crisp, the streetlights casting a soft yellow glow along the sidewalk. The usual post-class chatter had faded as our classmates rushed off to catch their trains, leaving just the two of us walking down the main road toward my bus stop.

The city was still alive—cars rolling past with their headlights cutting through the night, distant honks echoing, and the occasional murmur of people walking ahead. I pulled my jacket tighter around me, my bag slung over one shoulder, as Yunho walked in step beside me, his hands casually tucked into his pockets.

I didn't think much of it at first, but as we walked, I noticed the way he moved—subtle, instinctive. When I unconsciously veered too close to the curb, he shifted, placing himself between me and the street without a word. I glanced up at him, but his face remained neutral, as if he hadn’t even realized he was doing it.

Curious, I tested it. I deliberately took a step closer to the road, pretending to adjust my bag strap.

Without missing a beat, he adjusted too, his shoulder brushing mine as he once again positioned himself between me and the passing cars.

I bit back a smile. But then I tried to walk in front of him, doing a little skip as I near to the road to see if he’d follow.

And he did.

A hand was suddenly were on my shoulder and pushes me gently back on the sidewalk and position himself beside me. A warmth spread through my chest. It wasn’t exaggerated. It wasn’t done for attention. He simply moved with me, like an unspoken promise to keep me safe.

"You know the rule" I finally murmured, breaking the comfortable silence. He turned his head slightly, looking down at me with mild confusion. "What rule?"

"The sidewalk rule." I lifted a brow, tilting my head toward him. For a moment, he didn’t respond, just kept walking. Then, he let out a small chuckle, rubbing the back of his neck, his ears turning red. "It’s just a habit, I guess."

"A habit?"

"Yeah." His voice was softer now. "I was raised to always walk on the side closest to the street when I’m with someone I—" He paused, clearing his throat, looking away. "—when I’m with someone important."

My breath hitched.

I turned my head away, hoping the cool air would calm the sudden rush of warmth creeping up my neck. My heart pounded so loudly I was certain he could hear it.

We walked in silence for a few more steps until the bus stop came into view. Yunho slowed his pace beside me, as if reluctant to reach it too soon.

And I realized, at that moment, I didn’t want the walk to end either.

February 21, 2025

It was late, the night air cool as our group made their way down the sidewalk towards the train station. Streetlights flickered overhead, their warm glow casting long shadows along the pavement. Conversations were scattered—some laughing, some yawning, everyone eager to get home after another long class.

As we approached my usual bus stop, the others barely slowed, waving quick goodbyes as they hurried off to catch their trains. I watched them disappear down the road, my breath fogging slightly in the chilly air.

All except one.

"You guys go ahead," Yunho’s voice came from beside me. His hands were stuffed into his jacket pockets, his posture relaxed, yet there was an undeniable certainty in his tone. "I'll wait for her til' the bus comes."

I froze.

My heart stuttered so hard I thought for sure he'd hear it. I turned slightly, expecting some kind of teasing grin, but there was none. Just him, standing there as if it were the most natural thing in the world.

The others didn’t question it. They just nodded and waved, disappearing into the night. And suddenly, it was just the two of us.

The bus stop felt quieter than usual, the occasional car humming past as we stood beneath the soft glow of the streetlight. I shifted my weight from one foot to the other, trying to ignore the way my pulse quickened. "You really didn’t have to wait, you know," I murmured, glancing up at him.

He shrugged. "It’s fine." Then, a small smirk tugged at his lips. "Can’t have you standing out here all alone, can I?"

I swallowed, warmth creeping up my neck.

For the next few minutes, we talked—about class, about the ridiculous things our professor said that night, about how our classmates were still struggling with the configurations. His voice was smooth, casual, as if this was just another normal moment. But for me?

I was barely keeping it together.

The way he stood close enough that our arms almost brushed. The way his laughter rumbled softly in the quiet night. The way he looked down at me whenever I spoke, his eyes warm and focused, like nothing else existed in that moment but me.

Then, headlights appeared in the distance. My bus.

I felt a strange disappointment settle in my chest. As the bus slowed to a stop, I turned to him, unsure of what to say. "Thanks for waiting with me," I said, my voice softer than intended.

Yunho just smiled, tilting his head slightly. "Of course."

I took a step toward the open doors, but before I could climb in, I felt a gentle tug on my wrist.

I turned, wide-eyed. Yunho’s fingers curled lightly around mine, his grip warm even in the cold air, "Get home safe ... I-" he said, his voice quieter now, more intentional yet cutting himself off which made me curious.

And then, just like that, he let go, stepping back with an easy smile, as if he hadn’t just tilted my entire world.

I somehow managed to get on the bus, my legs feeling suspiciously weak. As the doors closed and the vehicle pulled away, I turned toward the window, watching as he stood there, hands back in his pockets, watching me leave.

He didn’t move until I was completely out of sight.

I barely survived that night without combusting.

February 26, 2025

I was late.

Again.

The clock glared at me with red, unrelenting numbers as I rushed out of my internship office, my heart pounding with a mix of exhaustion and urgency. The overtime had stretched longer than expected, eating into my class hours, and by the time I finally made it to the campus, an entire hour had slipped through my fingers.

I hated this. Hated the way I stumbled into the classroom, breathless, trying to make myself as invisible as possible while my professor continued the discussion without sparing me a glance. But I knew he noticed. His sharp, fleeting glance from the corner of his eye said enough.

I barely managed to slide into a chair before the weight of my lateness pressed into my chest like a cinderblock. The screen in front of me was filled with configuration steps and code I had no context for. My classmates were already deep into the task, their fingers flying over keyboards with an ease that only familiarity could bring.

I was lost.

The frustration built in my throat, burning hot and bitter. My fingers hovered uselessly over my touchpad as my eyes flickered between the screen and my classmates' progress. I tried to piece together what I had missed, but the more I stared, the more my thoughts tangled into a suffocating mess.

Then, a voice.

Low, familiar—steady.

"You okay?"

I blinked, snapping out of my panic just enough to register the presence beside me.

Yunho.

When had he moved closer? He had been at one of our classmate's table earlier helping on the task, but now he was right beside me, his presence a quiet force against my frazzled nerves. His scent—rich, chocolate-sweet cologne—wrapped around me, grounding and distracting all at once.

I turned my head slightly, and that’s when I realized just how close he was.

Too close.

He wasn’t even pretending to keep a respectable distance. His shoulder nearly brushed mine, his face mere inches away. The dim glow of the computer monitor cast soft shadows across his features, making the sharp angles of his jawline look impossibly gentle.

I nodded, moving to one of our friend's computer as he navigates the task, I watch the task unfolding, hoping I could catch up but with Yunho's presence really close to me was a challenge I don't think I'll success.

A small smile tugged at his lips, almost amused. "Focus," he murmured, voice dipping lower. "I need you to teach me."

Teach him?

The irony almost made me laugh. I was the one barely keeping my head above water, the one scrambling to understand what I had missed, and yet here he was—acting like I had everything under control.

But there was something in his tone. Something reassuring, something that pulled me away from my spiraling frustration and anchored me to the moment.

To him.

I swallowed, forcing myself to nod. "Right. Okay."

I tried to focus, I really did.

But every time he leaned in to ask our friend what he did, every time his voice brushed against my ear, my brain short-circuited. The deep timbre of his words sent shivers down my spine, making it nearly impossible to concentrate.

At one point, I had been leaning forward too long, my back protesting from the awkward position. I shifted, stretching slightly as I took a small step back—only for my heel to catch against something solid.

A box.

A stupid box filled with unused wires.

I barely had time to gasp before I lost my balance, the world tilting as I braced for impact. But I never hit the ground.

Warm hands caught me. One gripping my waist, firm and steady. The other securing my forearm, his fingers wrapping around my wrist like a lifeline.

My breath hitched.

For a moment, neither of us moved. The air between us was thick, electric, charged with something unspoken. My heart pounded wildly against my ribs as I slowly lifted my gaze, and that’s when I realized—he was staring at me.

Really staring.

His expression had shifted from his usual playful ease to something deeper, something unreadable. His dark eyes searched mine, his grip on me unwavering.

"You okay?" His voice had softened, laced with concern.

I could barely breathe. My entire body was frozen, caught in the intensity of his gaze, in the warmth of his hands still steadying me.

I nodded—too quickly. "Y-Yeah. I just—I should—" I cleared my throat, forcing my voice to sound normal. "I should get back to my seat."

His hands lingered for half a second longer before he finally let go, and I nearly stumbled again—not because of the wires this time, but because my knees felt ridiculously weak.

I didn’t dare look at him as I hurried back to my seat, my heart still hammering, my skin burning where his hands had been.

But minutes later, a chair scraped against the floor, and before I knew it, he was sitting behind me. I inhaled sharply, trying to calm my racing pulse, "Go to the partition first," Yunho instructed, his voice steady, as if nothing had just happened. "You need a drive to place your folder."

I nodded, gripping the mouse, determined to focus. But my fingers didn’t move the pointer to the right place.

He noticed, "There," he pointed, his patience unwavering.

I tried again. Fumbled. And then—his hand covered mine. Large. Warm. Steady. Guiding the mouse effortlessly, his fingers brushed against mine, sending a sharp jolt of electricity up my spine.

My breath hitched. My whole body stiffened. The world outside this moment ceased to exist. The quiet murmurs of our classmates, the soft hum of the computers, the faint tapping of keyboards—it all faded into nothingness.

All I could focus on was him.

His warmth against my skin.

The way his fingers curled slightly over mine, his grip neither forceful nor hesitant, just there—as if this wasn’t something he had to think about, as if guiding my hand was the most natural thing in the world.

Seconds stretched endlessly. I forgot how to breathe, forgot how to think, forgot how to function.

He didn’t move.

Neither did I.

The space between us shrank, charged with something unspoken, something that made the air feel heavier. I could feel his breath ghosting near my temple, slow and steady, in complete contrast to the erratic drumming of my own heartbeat.

I swallowed hard, my throat dry.

I should pull away. I should.

But I didn’t. Because for all the chaos in my head, for all the ways my body betrayed me with its nervous tremors, there was one undeniable truth—

I liked this.

I like him.

March 14, 2025

Guilt settled heavily on my chest as I walked toward campus, my steps slower than usual.

I had clocked out overtime again, staying later than planned at my internship. It was becoming a habit, one that weighed on me more than I cared to admit. The familiar exhaustion clung to my body, but it was nothing compared to the quiet guilt pressing down on me.

By the time I arrived at my night class, the discussion had already been going on for an hour. I barely took a breath before sliding the door open.

The creak of the door was louder than I intended, loud enough to make heads turn. The room fell into momentary silence, the professor pausing mid-sentence.

I bowed my head slightly. "Sorry I’m late."

Keeping my voice steady, I gently closed the door behind me. My friends greeted me with small smiles as I passed, but I barely acknowledged them. My mind was still occupied—by my professor’s earlier warning, by the weight of my internship hours, by the nagging feeling that I was always two steps behind.

I settled into my seat, adjusting my chair as I exhaled quietly. It was only then that I felt it. I didn’t have to look to know whose they were.

Even as I focused on my computer, booting it up, I could feel his gaze lingering on me—not intrusive, just there. A quiet presence, unwavering, as if he had been waiting.

The soft glow of my friend’s screen pulled my attention. They were exchanging files, peer-to-peer, laughing as they successfully transferred them. The energy in the room felt light, carefree—so different from the tightness in my chest.

I sighed, rubbing at my temple before shifting my gaze to the board. The task was written clearly, the instructions laid out in neat bullet points. I had to catch up. Again.

"You'll catch up quickly." His voice cut through my thoughts just as a familiar scent—warm, chocolate-sweet cologne—wrapped around me.

My body instantly relaxed.

I leaned back slightly, eyes flickering to my side, where Yunho sat comfortably beside me. He wasn’t even looking at his own screen—just watching me with a quiet sort of amusement.

I scoffed lightly, turning back to my task. "Barely…"

He noticed something in my tone, something unspoken. His breath came out in a quiet sigh. "You don’t have to worry about being late when you can catch up this fast."

I turned to him, frowning slightly. "If only I wasn’t being called out…"

Before he could respond, one of our classmates announced that we could take a break. I grabbed my snacks and drink, slipping out of the room before the air inside became too suffocating.

The campus at night was quiet, peaceful.

Most of the buildings were dark, the hallways emptied out as students took their breaks in small groups. I walked up a few steps, my feet leading me instinctively to the open soccer field. It wasn’t particularly grand—just an expanse of grass surrounded by empty bleachers—but the sky above it made all the difference.

Stars.

They scattered across the vast darkness, twinkling softly, stretching endlessly beyond my reach. The sight alone eased some of the tightness in my chest, the weight of the day slowly lifting.

I sat on the benches, nibbling on a cookie from my container, my gaze locked onto the sky. The quiet, the solitude—it was exactly what I needed.

Until I felt presence sat beside me, his usual cologne had been my cravings ever since and I didn’t need to look to know who it was. He didn’t say anything at first, simply making himself comfortable next to me.

"Stars make you calm."

It wasn’t a question. It was a statement. A fact. A truth only he seemed to know.

I glanced at him, but he was already looking at the sky, his features relaxed in the dim glow of the field lights. Something about the way he sat beside me—so effortlessly, as if he belonged there—made my chest ache in a way I couldn’t quite name.

Without thinking, I tilted my cookie container toward him in silent offering. He glanced down, a small smile playing on his lips before he shook his head. "I’m good."

I shrugged, taking another bite, savoring the sweetness on my tongue as the night stretched around us. The air was cool, tinged with the distant scent of damp grass, and the silence between us was easy—comfortable in a way that made my heart ache.

Then I noticed an arm—his arm—outstretched just behind me.

Not quite touching. Not quite reaching. Just there.

I glanced down, my breath catching slightly when I saw his hand resting flat on the seat, fingers lightly curled against the worn wood, mere inches from where I sat. Close enough that if I leaned back even slightly, I would feel the warmth of him.

For a moment, my mind raced. Had he meant to do that? Or was it just a natural movement? But then I realized—this bench had no backrest. And his arm wasn’t just there.

It was there for me.

A quiet, unspoken shield. A presence that kept me from leaning too far back, from losing balance on the edge of the bench. A silent protection. My throat tightened, a warmth blooming in my chest that had nothing to do with the night air.

I swallowed hard, staring back up at the stars as if I hadn’t noticed. But I had. And from the way Yunho sat, his posture relaxed yet deliberate, I knew he had too.

Class had ended, but I wasn’t free just yet. I lingered in the quiet classroom, shifting my weight from foot to foot as my professor gave me a patient but pointed look.

"I know your internship keeps you busy," he said, his voice gentle yet firm. "But you’re missing too much of the discussion. Try to balance it better, alright?"

Guilt pricked at my chest. I nodded, murmuring an apology, though my mind was already running through the hours I had spent at my internship today. The exhaustion from overtime clung to me like a second skin, pressing into my shoulders, but I couldn’t let it show.

As I stepped out of the classroom, the hallway stretched before me, eerily empty. The faint hum of a vending machine buzzed from the corner, the overhead fluorescent lights flickering slightly, casting soft shadows on the polished tiles.

A heavy sigh escaped my lips. I adjusted the strap of my bag and headed for the exit. A shadow shifted near the corner of the hallway, just beyond the reach of the dim light. My breath hitched, my pulse jumping in surprise.

"Ah!—" I barely had time to react before a familiar chuckle cut through the silence.

"Did I scare you?" He stepped forward, emerging from the dim glow like a scene straight out of a dream. His hands were stuffed into the pockets of his dark jacket, the fabric slightly wrinkled from the way he had been leaning against the wall. His hair was tousled, the strands catching the light in a way that made my heart stutter.

My shoulders relaxed, but my pulse refused to slow down. "Argh! Yunho!" He chuckles as we walk down the hallway, I turn to him frowning, "What are you doing here? I thought you left with the others."

He shrugged, falling into step beside me as we exited the building. "I figured you’d be held back."

I narrowed my eyes at him. "You figured?" He turned his head slightly, giving me a look that made my stomach flip. "You were late today, figured Sir Coups will speak to you. Again."

Heat crept up my neck. I tried to look indifferent, but the knowing glint in his eyes told me he had already seen through me. Before I could defend myself, he nudged my arm lightly.

I blinked up at him. "What?"

"Smile… You look pretty." he murmured, his voice carried something unspoken. I shake my head but my lips still curled up into a small smile.

The silence that followed wasn’t uncomfortable. If anything, it was charged—thick with something lingering between us, something neither of us had yet put into words. The air felt heavier, warmer, despite the cool night breeze brushing against my skin.

We reached the front gate, and I instinctively slowed my steps, scanning the road for any sign of my bus. But there was nothing. No buses, no jeepneys, no taxis—just the dimly lit street stretching into the distance, eerily quiet. I was hoping a bus or anything will pass by so I could climb in as soon as possible.

But looks like fate has different plans.

With a resigned sigh, I started walking toward the next stop, and as expected, Yunho followed without hesitation.

The streetlights cast long shadows as we walked, the soft glow bouncing off the pavement. The only sounds were the distant hum of traffic and the rhythmic steps of our shoes against the sidewalk.

I hesitated before speaking. "Won’t your parents worry about you getting home this late?" He exhaled a soft chuckle, shaking his head. "No, they don’t mind… as long as they know I get you home safely."

I stopped mid-step.

For a moment, everything around me faded—the city lights, the distant sounds of passing cars, even the cool breeze nipping at my skin. My heart thudded violently in my chest, so loud I was sure he could hear it.

My smartwatch vibrated against my wrist. Abnormal pulse detected.

Of course. Of course, it did. Not with him for always making my heart abnormally fast!

I swallowed thickly, my face burning. Get me home safely? Had he really just said that? So casually, as if it was the most natural thing in the world? Before I could fully recover, Yunho turned slightly, his expression amused. "You okay? You look a little—"

"I’m fine!" I blurted out, shoving his arm lightly as I marched ahead, desperate to escape the warmth blooming across my face. He let out a soft laugh, the sound deep and rich, but he didn’t push me further. Instead, he fell back into step beside me, hands still tucked in his pockets.

A few more minutes passed before my bus finally appeared in the distance, its headlights cutting through the dim glow of the streetlamps. I exhaled in relief, stepping forward as it slowed to a stop.

But just as I reached for the handrails, something warm wrapped around my wrist.

I turned—and everything stopped.

Yunho’s fingers curled gently around mine, his grip neither loose nor forceful. Just enough to hold me there. Just enough to make my breath hitch.

The warmth of his touch seeped into my skin, spreading like wildfire through my veins. I looked up, wide-eyed, and he only smiled—a soft, knowing smile that made my stomach twist in the most unbearable way.

"Get home safe," he murmured, his voice quieter now, deeper, as if he were speaking directly into my soul. And there was no longer hesitation in his eyes. "I still need to take you out on a date."

My brain short-circuited.

A date?

Before I could even process it, before I could react, before I could breathe—

He lifted my hand and pressed a soft, feather-light kiss against the back of it.

The world blurred.

The sounds of the city dulled into silence.

Even my own heartbeat seemed to pause, as if it couldn’t decide whether to stop completely or speed up until it burst. His lips barely lingered for a second, but the warmth of his touch burned into my skin, leaving behind something I knew I’d never forget.

The bus doors hissed open behind me, but my feet refused to move. I stared at him, my mind racing, my heart a mess of erratic beats.

Yunho pulled away, his eyes never leaving mine. His fingers slowly slipped from my wrist, the absence of his touch leaving a void I wasn’t ready to acknowledge.

The driver cleared his throat, snapping me out of my trance. Dazed, I stepped onto the bus, my legs trembling beneath me.

The doors slid shut. The bus rolled forward.

Through the glass window, I saw him—standing on the sidewalk, hands in his pockets, watching with a smile on his lips until I was gone. A breath I hadn’t realized I was holding escaped my lips.

The bus driver chuckled, shaking his head as he glanced at me through the rearview mirror, "Young love," he mused, his voice tinged with amusement.

I swallowed, my fingers grazing the spot where Yunho’s lips had touched. A slow, giddy smile spread across my face.

[otomeorangejuice]

The last post I reblogged sent me on a spiral so here's how all the LADS LIs are nerds.

Zayne: He's a surgeon, that went through med school. Next.

Jk. Definitely the kinda guy to tell you random facts about the body, forgetting how gross some of them are and getting really embarrassed when his medical nerd talk puts you off your dinner. Loves explaining things whether it's his job or weird things about the human body. Tbh if he wasn't a doctor he'd probs be a teacher. Also ik it's his job but the lab coat SCREAMS nerd.

Caleb: military pilot with gravity powers, NERD. His fave subjects in school were probably physics and maths. Can name pretty much any aircraft at a glance and will yap to you about physics theories and the inner working of his favourite planes if you let him.

Everybody except those closest to him thinks he's just smart and cool but MC, Zayne and Gideon know that he's a chronic nerd that shows his affection by yapping at you about how cool planes are.

Rafayel: Art nerd. Now I don't think he'd care much about human art history overall, although I do feel he'd have a soft spot for the likes of Impressionism. But he's a nerd about the craft, the materials. He canonically creates his own pigments from seashells and such (which as a fellow art nerd I find so cool) but I personally believe he's probably experimented with trying to get natural pigments from all sorts of things.

This man is a colour theory girlie and he will ramble on to anyone about specific pigments and how he's aiming to achieve them. Thomas can pretty much rattle off the way he works by memory and sometimes finds himself looking at different things and wondering if that will give Rafayel the shade he's looking for. He low-key hates it but he tells himself it's for the good of the exhibitions and the art scene at the end of the day.

Sylus: Now I know we all joke that he's an old man but personally I think he's both a music and tech nerd. Like every person who knows about technology only trusts it so much (Catch him hating how much AI junk is infecting our lives ATM) plus Mephisto exists, like I think his tech parts are Sylus' doing. He's also a nerd about weapons and mostly collects them for fun only having a few that he actually uses for combat while overall preferring to use his fists and his evol.

Now he can't play music to save his life but he has the best audio systems money can buy, he has several record players, some vintage, some modern and he collects all sorts of vintage music paraphernalia. (Catch him having one of Eddie Van Halen's guitars on display). He canonically likes the Beatles (there's a pile of records as a decoration for his room on one of them is labeled Beatles) so I think he'd be a classic rock fan (Fits his vibe) but he still enjoys classical and opera

Xavier: Now Xavier is the only one who I don't think is a nerd. He's worse. This man is a gamer. From old school Nintendo to the newest VR releases he's played a good mix of everything. Personally I feel like he leans towards cozy games, has the cutest animal crossing island and the most impressive farm on stardew valley. Has definitely made himself and MC in the Sims (and then made Charlie and removed the ladder while he was in the pool). But he's also a god at the likes of the Bloodborne series. If he's feeling particularly jealous or pent up a few rounds of bashing bosses on Elden Ring will make him feel better. Also don't try playing a fighting game with him, he'll wreck you at Street Fighter.

And there we are the nerd (and gamer) squad.

[maraskywalkers]

if Buck & Eddie talk every day but then there comes a week where they keep missing each other & it doesn't usually happen more than once or twice but this week they just can't seem to catch each other at the right time

Buck has a busy shift so there's no downtime & he crashes when he gets home & he's apparently been going on dates again and Eddie is still adjusting to a new job & navigating how to find his footing in Chris's life & dealing with his parents still trying to control everything & he has no real say in anything & he just wants to talk Buck because Buck's his person & he can help make sense of everything & be a sounding board to help Eddie figure out what to do but again they can't seem to catch each other

& then finally there's some 118 get together & it's low-key and casual but Eddie sees them talking about it in the group chat & that's fine except that apparently Buck brings a date, someone he's been seeing that he likes & wants to see if it could be going anywhere & so Eddie doesn't suggest they FaceTime then instead just tells them all to have a good time & they'll have to plan a visit soon

& it's all fine he knows they miss him & he tries to make plans with Chris but his parents are like he's busy this weekend & we can't disrupt his routine or whatever

& so he's at home alone when he sees pics from the 118 get together posted online & it's like the last straw of a terrible week bc he misses them, he misses LA, the 118, the family he chose for himself, he misses Chris even tho they're in the same zip code again bc it feels like they're still hundreds of miles apart & nothing he does feels like it's bringing them any closer, & he misses Buck who is hundreds of miles away & who feels like he's drifting further & further from with each missed phone call, declined FaceTime, & delayed text reply

so he ends up getting drunk on his kitchen floor & leaving Buck a sad voicemail telling Buck how much he wishes Buck was here with him & how much he wants to talk to him & some other things he can't remember before Eddie goes to bed tipsy & emotional & so so tired & he wakes up the next morning having slept past his alarm bc his phone is dead & he has a hangover & he thinks about just sleeping in some more but then there's a knock on his front door

when he opens it, it's Buck with a small suitcase & an anxious smile & he's rambling about how he got Eddie's voicemail but Eddie didn't answer is phone & is he okay, he didn't sound okay, so he got Bobby to approve some time off & he knows it's impulsive but Eddie said he needed him so he just figured he'd show up is that okay Eddie please say something

& that's when everything Eddie's been feeling this past week, month, year finally boils over and he chokes out Buck's name & then Buck is holding Eddie while he cries into Buck's big stupid chest & Buck rubs his back and says something like

I'm here, I've got your back

& Eddie says something like

I know, you always do

& they just stand there holding each other for while

[the-mpreg-guy]

always thinking about how castiel probably had friends before, and definitely went against heaven before, but when he said "dean we will all be hunted" dean says "it's worth it" and when castiel comes back after being exploded dean keeps him updated throughout the entirety of season 5 (except for point of no return but. like. that's the point of the episode that dean is rejecting everyone in his life). dean said "if you fall, i'll be there with you" and castiel went unlobotomized for several seasons. dean said "you fall, i'll be there to help catch you" and castiel went. i think i can try and rebel knowing that. NOT KNOWING... THAT DEAN HAS PLACED HIM ON A PATH TO FINALLY ESCAPE HEAVEN'S LEASH BY SEASON 8. AFTER THAT HE'S FREE!!! AND HE DOESNT KNOW THAT TRUSTING THIS ONE HUMAN WILL SAVE HIM. AAAAAAAAAAAAUGH

CASTIEL HAS REBELLED MANY TIMES, BUT HAD BEEN ALONE EACH TIME (that we know of) AND THIS TIME SOMEONE SAID "I'LL BE WITH YOU" AND HE FINALLY FREED HIMSELF.

You're tapping into something that I wanted to talk about here a few days ago, so forgive me for rambling incoherently about this.

I feel like there's two different ways that people misunderstand Cas's defection from Heaven; people either tend to discredit Cas's choice of free will and chalk the entirety of his character development up to Dean's influence only, or they completely disregard the fact that Cas couldn't/wouldn't have defected if Dean hadn't been there to facilitate it.

Cas's friendships with other angels are born out of comradery in a "we're all soldiers on the same battlefield" way. We see in later seasons that Cas still refers to his "brothers and sisters" as soldiers. I think the only time we see Cas have an angel friendship that breaks that specific mold is between him and Hannah (and maybe Uriel), but that's another post I don't care to make.

Dean is a unique friendship because Dean is supposed to be one of the soldiers in the war, but Dean says fuck the war, if we're going to fight we're going to do it on the side of humans. He is a confident for Cas who is actually a confident. I think about Cas asking Dean if he can tell him something if he promises to never tell anyone else. Cas knew that his superiors wouldn't have liked to hear that and he knew that he would have been in trouble for saying it. Dean is a safe person for him to go to with his doubts and fears.

And Dean is the person who facilitates Cas's rebellion! He's the secret third option! He thought it was either obey or fall, but Dean said hey actually you can be something else! You don't have to pick between Heaven and Hell, you can pick what's right, which is what Cas had been trying to pick the entire time, but had no one helping him.

My favorite thing about Cas saying "good things do happen, Dean" is that Cas is the good thing that happened to Dean, but Dean is also the good thing that happened to Cas.

[sleepsucks]

[nunkisketches]

They can get cute sometimes🧡💚