#still learning how to best blog fanfics here

[flamingpudding]

Part 3 of Ghost Kid in Gotham

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Feral brother of mine

When Damien first saw the video from Todd's helmet he only thought of his older brother as an imbecile that apparently couldn't handle children that was until Drake paused the video on the child's face before the video cut off.

Then Richard pointed out the similarities to Damien and of course his first thought was that his mother had made another clone again that they would need to dispose of. That was until he took a closer look at the image when Drake zoomed in. It was still blurry but Damien would recognise that face anywhere and in any state.

Despite his memory being faded it was the face of someone he never wanted to forget and would let freely hunt his dreams. Even if it was to recall the good times or even the bad times through nightmares. Freckles that mirrored constellations and scar by the ear from a training session when the others' dodging ability had not yet been up to par when they were five. Hair longer than his own and less tameable.

Danyal Al Ghul.

His twin that he killed at the age of eight when their grandfather forced them into a fight to death. This was not a simple clone of Damien himself and the teen was pretty sure that his mother must have lost it. Because what else then a clone of his own brother could this be, she probably must have preserved some of Danyal's DNA if not his entire body for this. He must also applaud her cruelty, for the clone was at the exact age his brother had died at.

He does not know why nor how his mother had managed to cause glowing Lazarus green eyes. None of his clones had ever shown these before but a part of him didn't want to know. It already made him sick enough to know that his mother would go so far as to clone Danyal.

All he wanted was to get rid of this cruel clone that wore his long dead brother's face. The knowledge of his brother was something Damien held dear. It was something that belonged to him only and the burden of his death was not something he ever wanted to share either. Besides what use would it be to his family to mourn a member they never would have gotten to meet.

Even as he glared at Todd, who had let loose the feral clone. He could not bring himself to tell them that this was most likely not just a simple clone of himself.

"Come on guys, there is a child running around the Bat Cave. You can fight later about how to safely keep the boy in check."

Clicking his tongue he turned away from his older siblings and drew out his katana. "<tt> I will get rid of that thing myself."

A thing, that was what it was. Damien didn't need his personal feelings or his memories of a twin that could smile brighter than the desert sun despite their pain, get in the way of his rationality. He could not allow this mockery of his twin brother to live on.

He went for the darker areas of the Cave knowing the league trained mind and he was in luck as he was the first to find the feral child hidden away in the area that lead to the medbay. By now the thing was even armed. Damien recognised the dagger as one of his training once, he probably had accidentally left it out of its casing after training right before patrol.

The ex-league prodigy did not give the clone time to react as he attacked without warning. Chasing it through the Bat Cave as it avoided his attacks yet made no move to attack him the way it had Todd. At times the way it dodged made Damien stutter slightly something that never happened before. He slashed at it, ignoring his siblings that shouted for him to stop from the side lines. Ignoring the flashes in his mind of a fight years ago that was similar yet so different.

"I will not let this mockery run free." He muttered pointing his blade as it hissed at him in return. What a feral thing it was, he waited for it to make the first move this time. Clones were not perfect, their forms were lacking, They might retain skills of their original but they rarely were the same let alone cable of thinking outside of what their creator, his mother wanted. He pointedly ignored anything he new about certain clones. They weren't created by his mother, therefore did not count in regards to his conclusion. Yet it was painful seeing this mockery of his dead brother appearing like a perfect copy.

The stance it held with the dagger, despite the feral hissing and movements, it was the exact same his brother had. Sword stances, like martial arts stances had a basic form, every wielder learned and then developed further into their own unique one with time. Danyal had one where he tended to hold the dagger or even swords backwards in his left hand while his right arm covered his empty side with a slight tilt to the back, always ready to reach for any weapon he would carry in hidden pockets on his back.

It was painful to see this clone, this thing mimicking his brother's stand this perfectly. Damien could only narrow his eyes in determination, or was it desperation by now? This was just one more reason to get rid of it. It just hurt even more when with a quick gaze towards the hand that held the dagger Damien also noticed a bad habit his brother had always retained and the league had also never been able to train out of him. It was a small habit, unnoticeable if you wouldn't look for it, yet dangerous to the sword / dagger wielder if they were inexperienced.

Danyal tended to let his thumb rest against the guard if the blade had one or against the blade itself even if it didn't have one. He knows that his twin used to have scaring on his thumb from this habit, especially from their early training years.

This thing was even imitating his brother's habit.

He wanted it gone. Rip it apart and present it to his mother with all the anger and grief it brought to him.

"Guys stop Damien now! That is not a clone!" He heard Drake yell from where the Batcomputer was but he didn't care. This was a clone, so he lunged at the it again. Ignoring how the clone had studied him like he had it. Ignoring how its stance had changed the longer they had watched each other and how that thing let its guard down all of a sudden.

"Damien! Stop!"

It dropped all defenses and Damien could only see that as his chance to deal the final blow to get rid of it. But what he didn't expect despite the dropped defenses was for the clone to also just drop the dagger, close its eyes and smile. The same smile that still hunted his nightmares. His mind flashed back to eight years ago.

"Demon brat! Calm the fuck down!"

The blade stopped inches from the same fatal placement that had killed his brother before. Drake and Richard were right behind him while Todd was by the clone's side gripping at the blade with his bare hands, most likely bleeding already.

"Why?" Damien uttered quietly, his eyes trained on the thing. Richard must have thought that his question had been directed towards them stopping him but that wasn't the case.

"Look Dami, how about listening to what Tim found out first before we decide what to do with that child?"

"Not you." He couldn't help but snap back at them as he withdrew his katana, hearing Todd mutter something about sharp blades and bandaids as well as several curses under his breath. His eyes stayed on the thing. "Why would you let me kill you? Why drop your defence ces? Why not dodge?"

The thing titled its head its glowing green eyes were trained on Damien and he noticed how they flickered into a blue that was so familiar yet so different with the way they glowed. It made chirping noises before it whispered something.

"ahbak, Dami"

Damien froze for a moment there at the quiet words the thing had whispered. How was he supposed to react now? Was this even a clone, no he knew this was a clone. There was no way Danyal was alive let alone still eight years old. He had killed his own brother, he had held him in his own arms as Danyal took his final breath, smiling at him and uttering the same words he had just heard again after so many years.

Even if Danyal had survived somehow then he should be the same age as him. Not the age he had died at. Besides, their grandfather would have never allowed them to use the pits to revive his twin.

"FUCK!"

Intentionally or not Todd's outcry had ripped him out of his thoughts by a rather pathetic yowl of pain. It was like a switch had been flipped in the clone's mind as his brother had reached out to probably detain it again. The moment Todd had touched him, the thing had bitten into his hand before letting go, hissing and running away from them once more.

But instead of running after that thing Damien stood frozen in place, his mind still racing. He could feel Richard's hands on his shoulders, grounding the teenager with the warmth they provided. "You okay there Baby Bird? You seem rather out of it suddenly."

"<tt> I am fine." His only offered answer, ignoring the worried looks he was getting as he moved to wipe Todd's blood off his blade. He needed a distraction before his mind became any more chaotic and unreasonable. "What did Drake find out?"

"Right… you sure you want to hear that right now?" Giving Richard an unimpressed stare, the oldest sighed looking over towards Drake.

"Well I got good news and probably bad news." Side eyeing his brother Damien kept silent waiting for him to continue.

"I can safely say that the child is not a clone. His DNA does not 100% match yours. It differs too much but - and this is where it's probably bad news - it matches with you to 45%, with a matching to Bruce to about 50%, same with Talia. If I run a paternity test I am sure it would be a hit for Bruce and Talia."

Damien swallowed taking in that information, knowing what it meant. Was he horrified? Yes. Did it also awaken a strange sort of hope? Also, Yes.

"But there was a third compartment of the child's DNA structure which was impossible to test. It could even corrupt DNA samples if not taken apart from the rest. It probably has something to do with the green specs I found in his blood too. So I ran a substance analysis and - you probably won't like this - but it got a hit from a substance we have recorded in our database."

"What substance?" Damien knew, he just knew he wouldn't like the next words Drake would say. He could feel Richard squeezing his shoulder as if to help him keep stable.

"Lazarus Water. It matched with what we have recorded from the Lazarus Pits."

"Drake, are you telling me that after eight years, my mother who apparently had preserved my dead twin brother's body, dropped said body into the Lazarus Pits to revive him and then drop him off with Todd of all people?"

"Yes, wait… dead twin brother's body?"

[planetallure]

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧ fic recs

CW: these works contain explicit content intended for those 18+. make sure to read the rules of the writers before interacting.

@peterthepark : coming back to this blog made me realize when exactly i started back reading fanfic fr. the moment that was eddie mf munson, touched something in me. reign was one of my first intros that really stuck with me. it kinda blew my mind and scared me at the same time because i was like…how do i move on…what’s better than this??? brilliance. creative genius. like what more do you want from me? reign, i miss you. <3

i rec literally anything she’s written about eddie or tasm!peter parker.

@ohcaptains : i really don’t know what to tell you man. leah. is. HER. she simply does not miss. funny story: when i first started my old blog, it was ageless so i ended up getting blocked. so i pm’d her basically begging to come back home because i knew what i had lost. i’m not ashamed.

"dealers choice" - if you happened to miss the moment that was eddie munson or you miss his character or you were never really into him, this lil universe is for you. <3

"learning in public" - carmy x fem!reader. he needs it. he wants it. he has to have it. a man on his knees. enjoy.

"don't you dare fall in love" - heads up this one was discontinued and will not be continued (so don’t go harassing her about it) but the last part has an open ending so don’t let that stop you. college student/dealer!ellie x fem!reader. it’s beautiful and perfect. enjoy.

also ALL of her frank castle, abby anderson, tasm!peter parker fics. thank youuu

@inknopewetrust : this woman is a W R I T E R. the beautiful angsty things that come from her brain need to be cherished. thank you for your service.

“hoping i’ll find [a glimpse of us]” - when i tell you this shit was so fricking good!!!!!?! another piece of LITERATURE that i couldn’t believe i got to read for free on tumblr. i am such a sucker for a angsty slow burn and this still lives in me head rent free to this day. the tension had me giggling and laughing and biting my nail and crying. i need to spin back. i need to feel something!!

“secret” : now this one was a sexy forbidden romance. eddie’s our man who isn’t our man but is and oh m gee the angst in this one got me too, though it wasn’t as much. preppy!reader x eddie munson iykyk.

@etherealising : the absolute sweetest person i’ve met on here. every interaction i have with her just makes me smile. on TOP of that she’s a beautiful writer and storyteller. vee you have my heart.

“all i ever knew only you” - the best carmy x oc fic i’ve ever had the pleasure of reading on here. i’m so emotionally attached to this series, its characters and i think it has such re-readablity . the characterization is also so well done carmy x baby 4life. it’s currently discontinued but she is currently doing a rewrite and it’s going really well! in the meantime, please don’t let that stop you from reading the original while it’s still up. you won’t regret it.

“a buried and a burning flame” - vee single-handedly has me looking a richie different now. like…wait a minute :)) the bickering and banter is so fun. tension? check. spice?? check.

“flew like a moth to you” - a continuation of the one above. babyyyy!!! yes, yes, uh huh 🙂‍↕️ these two? LOVE EM. he’s officially in my heart.

@totheblood : star is so kind and super creative. she has created some of my favorite ellie williams smau’s on here.

"the hard way" - rockstar!ellie williams x ex-gf!reader smau. you guys are brought together again to solve the mystery that is the anonymous account blackmailing the two of you. mmm, nothing like the takedown of a shady mf to bring the girls together again :)

@cherriesxinthespring : another sweetheart with a beautiful mind. ik people get the characterization/true nature of ellie so wrong, but not rosie. she gets it.

“wasteland, baby!” - the wlw true enemies to lovers slow burn i’ve been dreaming of. tap in. right now.

@elliesbelle

“nobody compares to you” : a deliciously angsty slow burn second chance romance (ex!ellie x f!reader)

all the text convos for abby and ellie.

@newasskid : this blog makes me so nostalgic. THE first fic series that i read and rebloged when i started my first ff blog, came from this writer. i honestly feel it was my first time reading fanfic that wasn’t a silly little wattpad story or imagine and i was honestly gagged. i was like, “this…this is literature.” what can i say? i love good ass characterization! and this one was no exception.

“hard knock life” - like i said i was gagged with how good it was. i read the first two chapters back in 2022 and i still remember the feeling i felt reading them. this new blog i’m making is a fresh start for me and a chance for me to get back into old fandoms. will be revisiting this one soon.

@lovelettersfromluna

"one of your girls" - biker!ellie/roommate!ellie/camgirl!ellie x f!reader ALL rolled into to this ridiculously sexy little universe!! i love these two so much :’(

"compass" - vampire!ellie !!!! my new favorite thing. the way luna writes her feeding on reader ALONE is the most erotic and intimate thing. my god this was hot.

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

sending all of this beautiful writers my love and respect y’all are amazing and so important. <3

[zepskies]

hi! so I had a question, how long did it take you to build a following on tumblr? how long have you been writing for spn as a whole (I assume you started with it but I’m not sure I meant when did you start writing on the app mostly) and do you think it usually takes as long as it did for you for other people? (I hope the wuestion made sense)

Hi there, lovely anon!

Oh, these are great questions, and I'm happy to answer. I'm going to be referencing this post, as someone asked me a similar question.

I also talk a lot about my beginning fanfic/coming to Tumblr experience and building a following in this interview I did with the @idlingintheimpalapodcast.

That being said, here's how I got started in SPN fandom and on Tumblr, and 6 Tumblr Tips related to how I've tried to grow my blog:

Learn How Tumblr Functions

Create a Tag List

Posting Schedules, Announcements, and Sneak Previews

People are Visual (Use Images & Design Elements) + shoutouts to blogs I looked to for inspo

Support Your Fellow Writers! Reblog/Comment on What You Read & Enjoy

When I Do Get Engagement, I Reply to Comments and Reblogs

Deeper dive below the cut:

Writing for SPN & Starting on Tumblr

To be honest, I'm a bit late to the party when it comes to Tumblr. I've written for many different fandoms over the 15 years or so I've been writing fanfic, but I've been writing for Supernatural in particular since around 2015. I wrote on platforms like Fanfiction.net, and later I moved over to Ao3.

I dabbled with Tumblr starting in 2021 while I was working on a Billy Butcher x OC story for the Boys (And So It Goes). But after watching the last season of SPN, I got the SPN bug again, so I started dipping back into the fandom.

But I wasn't really that active on Tumblr until January 2023, when I wrote my first soulmate AU series for Dean Winchester, called Never Say Goodbye (Dean x soulmate!Reader).

That started a very fun journey for me in the Tumblr world, engaging with people and making friends here with awesome people! 💕

Now, here are a few tips on what I've learned in building my following. You don't have to do exactly what I did. This is just my advice based on my personal experience here:

Tip #1: Learn How Tumblr Functions

Everything has been a process of trial and error. I have a professional background in content and social media marketing, so that knowledge has helped me a lot with some elements I'll get into later.

But it took me time to learn the Tumblr landscape. I had to figure out:

Why it's important to reblog -- not just your own work in replying to people's comments, but what you read and enjoy. It's what makes Tumblr go 'round.

The different mobile vs. desktop views and functions.

How to format my posts and use hashtags that would best optimize my fics and posts, based on the most followed tags in the fandom I was writing for.

How to create design elements, like banners, dividers, and headers that matched my aesthetic and the fandom.

Make sure my blog is easy to read, visually, and easy to navigate, technically (links to my masterlists, series masterlists, tag list, my fic library side blog, Patreon, etc.).

I'm still adjusting all these things now and then as I figure out new ways to keep readers engaged, and make my blog as easy to navigate as possible.

Tip #2: Create a Tag List

A tag list is a list of blog users that request to be tagged in your upcoming fics. (See this post on tips for formatting tag lists and optimizing hashtags on posts.)

Some authors don't do tag lists anymore because they find it a hassle (and it can be), but even if you're just starting out, advertise your tag list -- I suggest at the end of a fic and in your bio, your masterlist, and/or navigation page. It will get more eyes on your posts, and hopefully more engagement.

I used Google Forms to build up my tag lists because it's easy to use and it creates a Google spreadsheet for you based on the responses you get (an idea I got from another writer who was doing the same thing). You can also create more sheets within the file to organize the responses by character, for example.

On my tag list, I gave readers options to choose which character they wanted to be tagged on based on the fandoms I write for. I also created tag lists for new series to go with the series masterlist. Like I said above, I created spreadsheets for each of these lists within my tag list form master sheet.

Now, you don't have to do it exactly this way. There are many ways to keep track of a tag list.

Some people may think my approach is too much work, but this was very successful for me in building up my tag lists and increasing my following. Staying organized is key! 🤓✌🏽

I have since created a side blog @zepskieswrites for people to follow with notifications on, since my character tag lists are full.

Tip #3: Posting Schedules, Announcements & Sneak Previews

When my blog started to gain traction from my first SPN series, I knew I wanted to post consistently to keep people's interests. For me, this meant once a week (sometimes more if the mood strikes me), to keep that momentum going. YouTube vloggers do the same thing for this reason. They have a set posting schedule and give announcements.

You don't have to post once a week. You don't even have to have a set schedule. That's just what I did last year to increase engagement, but also because I love to write, I was getting inspired, and I made the time for it!

Remember that writing and sharing your work and being a part of the fandom on Tumblr is supposed to be fun! At the same time, what you get out of something depends on how much time you have to put into it.

Basically what I’m saying is, I’ve put a lot of time and energy into my writing and my blog, but only because it’s been very fun to do it! 😉

Now, going back to being consistent. It can help you! When people know they have content waiting for them by a certain timeframe, and they see that you stick to that deadline, they're more likely to tune in and engage with your work.

Of course, real life comes first, always, and things can derail you, but on the whole I make sure that I keep my word when I say I'm going to post something. Tumblr has a scheduling feature that allows you to schedule posts ahead of time, which I use on a daily basis. That can help you as well.

To try and generate buzz around new stories, I give writing updates or announcements, often with sneak previews, and the dates when I plan to drop the upcoming story. When I'm writing a series, on each chapter I give a preview of the next one, so I can try to keep people invested and waiting for the next chapter.

Tip #4: People are Visual (Use Images & Design Elements)

A huge element of successful content and social media is visuals. The first thing people are often drawn to when they look at a web page, an ad, or any kind of digital content is the picture -- and any other visual elements. Then they look at the title/headline, followed by the rest of the story.

This is why I always lead with the title of the story/headline and a GIF or image at the top of the post for a story. Draw readers in with their eyes to the visual, and then the content. I now create my own design elements, including story headers.

When I got started here on Tumblr, I also took a closer look at how other popular blogs I admired were organizing their masterlists, formatting their stories with banners, dividers, tags/warnings, word count, creating tag lists, and more -- both to create their blog aesthetic and to make it easier for readers to enjoy their work on different levels -- the content itself, and the visual elements.

Shoutouts to some of those writers I looked to, who have a lovely blog aesthetic and organization: @luci-in-trenchcoats @deanwinchesterswitch @deanbrainrotwritings @dean-winchester-is-a-warrior

Form and function is a balance, and they should work together. For example, there are some design/post formatting elements that are getting popular now on Tumblr that I personally don't vibe with, because I think it takes away from the reader's experience.

Like making the entire post or story in small case. Readers that have trouble seeing small fonts won't want to read this.

or making everything in the story lower case. this just bothers me for grammatical reasons. guarantee i will be turned off from reading. 😂

Also, most people browse Tumblr on their phone rather than on desktop. (About 62% according to current Semrush statistics.) So certain things that are small in your desktop version will be even smaller on mobile.

If you have a custom blog design, some design elements may not transfer well visually on mobile vs. desktop, and vice versa. So you'll want to check both versions to see how it looks, and possibly make adjustments.

Now, this isn't to say you have to become a graphic designer if that's not your thing. There are plenty of people who share their lovely designs for free, as long as you make sure to credit them if you use one of their banners, dividers, etc. Check out @cafekitsune and @firefly-graphics, for example.

Some of them even take requests. Just make sure to check their bio to see if they state whether they're currently taking requests or not. (This also goes for writers on fic requests.)

Tip #5: Support Your Fellow Writers! Reblog/Comment on What You Read & Enjoy

This is part of the fun when you start truly engaging with the fandoms you love.

Likes are cool. Comments are wonderful. Reblogs with comments are awesome, because not only do they get that engagement/feedback that they can reply to, but the reblog helps your fellow writers get seen. And while they aren't obligated to, they might be more inclined to do the same for you.

You'll also start to develop relationships within your fandom community. This is how I've made many friends and gained new readers on Tumblr -- by reblogging, sharing, commenting on what I liked about the fics I read. 💜

I try my best to support my fellow writers, no matter how new or how popular they are. Just because a writer has a bigger following, doesn't mean they appreciate feedback any less.

Feedback gives us writers energy and fuels us to write more. It can lead to more inspiration, and to continue the series you might be so invested in.

So if I took the time to read something, if I enjoyed it, I'm usually reblogging it and sharing my thoughts, even if it's just a gif or a couple of lines, or a long raving review. 💖

Tip #6: When I Do Get Engagement, I Reply to Comments and Reblogs

Along with supporting my fellow writers, engaging with the lovely people who read my work is just good fun! It's the best part of sharing my work on here and on Ao3. And it lets them know that you value and appreciate them for taking the time to comment and/or comment in a reblog. 💓💓💓

I hope these tips are helpful! Now, to answer your last question...

Do you think it usually takes as long as it did for you

[to build a following] for other people?

Interesting, but the truth is, I'm not sure. My knowledge of content and social media marketing has probably given me a leg up, I think, even though it took me a while to learn the Tumblrscape. I've also been writing fanfic for a long time. Long before I ever heard about Tumblr.

I've spent years studying literature, creative writing, and screenwriting, and putting it into practice. I've spent years writing for other voices besides my own, outside of the fanfic world. Like anyone else, I can only go by what I've learned, my own instincts, my frame of reference, and what I want to write about next.

Like anyone else, I can only hope that what I put out there vibes with people and touches them in some way, enough that they feel comfortable letting me know what they thought about it. 💜

In the meantime, I'll just keep getting inspiration from this guy (and other characters):

[pink-sparkly-witch]

Girls Night

Summary: Jensen’s girlfriend comes home a bit drunk after a girls night and tries to seduce him.

Pairing: Jensen Ackles x Female Reader

Warnings: Fluff, implied sexy times to come.

Words: 0.7k

A/N: I’m so proud that I set out to drabble and succeeded! 🥳 I’m a wordy bitch, so usually, when I set out to drabble, I fail epically 😅 All mistakes are my own.

Consider reblogging to spread this far and wide around this Hellsite or leaving a comment. It really does fuel a creative’s muse. If you’re too shy or too cool for people to know you read fanfic and don’t want it showing on your blog, you can submit an anonymous ask or drop me a DM. 💖

My Masterlist     AO3    Ko-Fi

“It’s been far too long since we last did this!” you declare, slamming another empty shot glass onto the wooden table.

“I know! And we say this every time, but we shouldn’t leave it so long next time,” Fiona shivers violently at the aftertaste of the tequila.

“Well,” Robin smirks, “if y’all put hoes before bros every now and then, we’d see each other a lot more often!”

“Excuse you,” you feign outrage. “If I remember right, you,” you point your finger for good measure, “are the one who didn’t come last time so you could ‘Netflix and Chill’ with Scott. I hadn’t seen Jensen in six weeks, and I came!”

“Oh, I came, alright!” Robin grins when you and your closest friends descend into laughter.

The familiar intro of Lionel Richie’s “Dancing on the Ceiling” begins, and you and the girls quickly make your way onto the dance floor. 

You spend the rest of the night cutting your best moves, singing at the top of your lungs and drinking tequila.

Walking into the hallway with your heels in your hand, you try to be as quiet as possible. Jensen has been working hard at the brewery and had been learning a script for a movie that starts shooting next week, so you knew he was likely sleeping at this late hour.

You carefully hold onto the handrail and climb the stairs, shushing your shoes every time the heel hits the wooden rail. 

Once at the top of the stairs, you frown when you see the bedroom light still on. You walk with heavy feet towards the door, peeking your head through the gap.

“Hey, baby,” Jensen smiles as he looks up at you. “Did you have a good time?”

“It was the best! We drank and talked and danced and drank. Did I already say that part? I think I already said that part. Anyway, we danced and sang. My throat will hurt tomorrow,” you stumble over to the bathroom and drop your shoes haphazardly on the floor. “But it was worth it,” you giggle.

“I’m glad,” Jensen grins. He always says you’re adorable when you’re drunk. Always so happy and carefree.

“What are you doing still up?” you ask.

“Gotta learn this script, baby. I’ve put it off too long,” he rubs at his tired eyes and smiles wide as you leave the bathroom in your underwear. “What are you doing, sweetheart?”

You climb on the bed—surprisingly gracefully, given your drunken state—and crawl up Jensen’s body. Straddling his waist, you run your hands under his shirt and up his stomach and grin as you feel his muscles twitch under your touch.

“Been thinking about you all night, Jensen. How much I wanted to be here with you, how you make me feel. I want you so bad, baby.”

“As much as I wanna say yes, baby girl, you’re too drunk,” Jensen says as his hands slide up your thighs.

“I’m not that drunk,” you pout more than complain.

“Even so, I think it’s best we just cuddle,” Jensen soothes.

“Ugh, fine!” you huff, throwing yourself off his lap and onto the bed. “But I want your A-game tomorrow!”

“When have I ever not brought my A-game?” Jensen laughs as you pull at the bed covers and ungracefully try to get into bed.

“Uhm, when I wore that dress to the 300th episode party? You barely lasted ten seconds!” you laugh.

“Excuse me! You looked really fucking hot that night! You knew I’d been ready for you since you’d stepped out of the hotel bathroom wearing that thing! And I made it up to you!”

“Yeah, you did!” you giggle. “Alright,” you say as you finally tuck yourself under the duvet. “What about the thirty second fumble on Jared’s boat?”

“Really? You really want me to explain to you how incredibly sexy it was rubbing sun tan lotion all over you and the idea that anyone could have seen me fucking you that day?”

“Okay, I’ll give you that one too,” you yawn and lie down, shuffling into his side and twisting your legs around his. “Just promise me you’ll bring you’re A-game in the morning.”

Snuggling further into him, you lay your head on his chest and your hand on his collarbone. Jensen wraps an arm around your shoulders and pushes the script he was reading to the floor.

“I promise. Good night, baby, I love you,” he chuckles softly as the heavy breathing tells him you’ve fallen asleep.

“Not that drunk, my ass!” he whispers as he kisses your head and turns out the bedside lamp.

Tags: @akshi8278 @ashbatz @candy-coated-misery0731 @chriszgirl92 @deans-baby-momma @deans-spinster-witch @deansbbyx @deanwanddamons @duncanhillscoffeecups @foxyjwls007 @giggles1026 @globetrotter28 @hobby27 @hoboal87 @impala67rollingthroughtown @iprobablyshipit91 @jackles010378 @jamerlynn @jc-winchester @k-slla @kazsrm67 @kmc1989 @lacilou @ladysparkles78 @leigh70 @lyarr24 @michecolegate @mrsjenniferwinchester @nancymcl @negans-lucille-tblr @perpetualabsurdity @roseblue373 @sandlee44 @sexyvixen7 @snackles87 @spnwoman @stixnstripesworld @stoneyggirl2 @suckitands33 @synmorite @tristanrosspada-ackles  @twinkleinadiamondsky @waters-2567 @winchestergirl1720

[canonicallyobserving911]

Buddie: I'm excited to see what's next for Buck, Eddie and Chris

Going forward, unless it's for reference purposes, I will NO LONGER post anything about BT 2.0.

Before I explain why I won't be posting anything about BT 2.0, I'll begin with a brief summary. In 2021, I watched "The Shooting" live (related post linked here) and it was one of the best scenes in television I'd ever seen. Since then, I've probably watched it more than a hundred times and during the hiatus between seasons 4 and 5, I purchased every episode of 9-1-1's previous seasons and I spent the entire summer watching seasons 2 - 4 because I wanted to know more about Buck and Eddie's relationship. I noticed the emotional and casual intimacy they shared and when I compared it to the relationships they had with love interests, it was easy to see there was a huge and noticeable difference.

My excitement for the show dramatically increased before season 5 began in September 2021 and later that year, I found the Buddie fandom here on Tumblr and I was even more excited because I didn't know fandoms for TV shows even existed. By the time April 2022 rolled around, I finally decided to rejoin Tumblr (after being off it for a while) because I wanted to communicate with people who liked Buddie and the Buckley-Diaz family.

I started out by doing small posts regarding the things I noticed but a whole knew world was opened to me after I started reading METAs fanfics and theories along with viewing GIF sets and fanart. It didn't take me long to start posting my own METAs and speculations and I when I wanted to add GIFs to my posts, I taught myself how to make them on my iPad. In January 2023, I started posting some of the fanfics I wrote during season 5 and my fandom experience was further enhanced. It was an exciting time and I loved every minute of it.

Even though Season 5 was exhausting as hell because of BT 1.0, I still enjoyed it because of Eddie's PTSD arc and the Buckley-Diaz family scenes that were included. Eddie's my favorite character and I was happy to see him moving forward with his therapy and his life in general. BT 1.0 was dragged out for the entire season but season 6 looked promising... at least it did until it ended. I spent more than three months writing "Constructive Criticism" posts about all the things I didn't like and I was on the fence about whether I was even going to watch season 7. But after the str*kes ended and the promos for the new season began airing on a new network looked promising, I was excited again especially since the original showrunner (TM) had returned from LS and I couldn't wait to see where he would take Buck's and Eddie's storylines.

Similar to the title of episode 2x17, I should have been careful about what I wished for because even though it started out strong, after the opening disaster, it turned into a complete and utter dumpster fire and my experience in this fandom not only became exhausting; it was horrifically horrible because of a kiss between Buck and a PLOT DEVICE. Almost immediately, Buddie shippers started being harassed and were sent asks from blank blogs (they weren't anonymous for me because I don't accept those) telling shippers to stop posting about Buddie because they were never going to be better than BT and that we should just accept BT because they were CANON 🙄.

Anyway, needless to say, the last 7 months have been pure hell because of toxic BT Stans who have no boundaries, morals or fandom etiquette. Therefore, since I can't control anyone but myself, this morning, I made a decision that going forward, I'm turning the page on the BT 2.0 relationship because it's over and I'm tired of talking about it. I don't give a rat's ass about why TM chose to do what he did and why they didn't let Buck learn anything from it especially since this wouldn't have happened if whatever they were doing had ended in 7x5 but I digress.

Be clear, this is not a vague post at anyone in particular. I'm simply stating that I will no longer participate in fandom discourse about that relationship because I'm sick of it and I'm f~cking glad it's finally done. For me, it's taken a backseat just like EddieShannon, EddieMarisol, EddieAna, BuckAbby, BuckTaylor, BuckAli and BuckNaTalia because they're over and the characters are barely being mentioned in CANON, if at all. I'm done posting about these 'sunk ships' and the only time I'll include them in a blog post is when I have to reference them. Otherwise, I've moved on and I will not add anti BT or anti TK tags to my posts unless it's for blacklisting and filtering purposes because I don't give a flying f~ck about T.K. 2.0 anymore.

Now that it's over, I'm excited about writing Buddie METAs, speculations and theories again. Prior to season 8, I stopped writing them because I didn't want to and I didn't have the energy or the desire to do it due to all the toxicity. Since I was tired of being jump scared, I stopped watching live after 7x6 aired and even though I did watch 7x10, I wished I hadn't because it was a big nothing burger.

I'm excited because I don't have to worry about seeing Buck with that one-dimensional love interest who couldn't act his way out of a paper bag.

This Thursday, for the first time in months, I'll be watching live again and I might live blog the episode. I miss doing that and I can't wait to see what's going to happen with the call on the "Hotshots" set that has a fake firefighter hanging from the aerial and I wonder if Eddie will have flashbacks about the night him and Buck got struck by the same bolt of lightning.

The purpose of this long post is to say, I've moved on and I will no longer dedicate any of my blog space, writings or anything else to that relationship because the character doesn't deserve my attention. It's even more exhausting than BT 1.0 and they were in a relationship for the entirety of season 5.

Since I love Eddie, I'm ready to focus my METAs and speculation on what's next for him. I was planning to do a long post on 8x6 but I won't since I've already done two long posts about BT 2.0's breakup. So now my attention will be focused solely on Eddie until I finish the posts I want to do regarding his scenes. I loved the fact that he got the majority of the screen time at the end of 8x6 and when Buck showed up, that made it even better.

I ONLY SHIP BUDDIE! I ALWAYS HAVE AND I ALWAYS WILL.

I've turned the page and I'm excited to see where Buddie is going next. I'm ready for them to enjoy spending time together again without Temu third wheeling and infringing on their relationship. I'm ready for their son to come home so the Buckley-Diazes can spend time together again too. I don't know when Chris will return but I don't think it was a coincidence that there was a picture of him on the sofa table that's next to the door underneath a picture of Texas especially since it was in the middle of Eddie and Buck.

So, here's to me being excited for Buddie and ignoring anything BT 2.0 related 🥳🍾🥂🎆.

I'm ready to enjoy my Buddie fandom experience again by creating METAs, theories, speculation, GIF sets and continuing to write fanfics and I can't wait!

[xviiper-rents-houses]

Yandere Sonic

Yes, yes, this is a bit of a random drabble. Grammar might not be the best but, hey, you get something! I'll probably do some writing for this guy later on, we'll see!

Sonic

Ah yes, the name of the games, comics and films: Sonic. Honestly, good character. He's smart, fast, funny and replies with quick combacks when battling enemies or participating in playful banter. Sonic has a bit of an ego as well, flamboyant and loves to show off, making you wonder why you should even root for him in the first place.

That's where the writers get you with Sonic constantly being humbled and told to slow down. His need for speed and impatience are two of the biggest weaknesses he bears, hindering Sonic from being whole. However, he learns from his mistakes and keeps trying; Sonic does not give up. Sonic also hyperfixates on problems that bother him, probably digging far too deeply into an issue that might not need that much solving, thus creating further problems.

That's where I get the idea that he could be a yandere. I mean, (this was mentioned in another blog) how scary would it be if he was your stalker? Petrifying, I'll tell you that. Honestly, you could be minding your own business, going on a simple walk or maybe doing a favorite hobby, being followed by Sonic and when you turn your back, there's no trace of your stalker.

Here's what makes it even better, (or worse, depending upon how you feel) Sonic in my interpretation would absolutely focus on you. Sure, he'd still interact with other characters but, you are his top priority. He'd chose you over anything. Sonic's good at putting up an act, he can downplay any accusations with his good reputation and charm.

Gaslight, gatekeep, girlboss. Sonic doesn't give up, as mentioned before, he will find a way to make you his. He's saved so many Mobians and Mobius itself alike, gone on interdimensional missions, fought in space; the blue hedgehog is a traveling connoisseur. Each adventure he went on, Sonic made it out alive and better than before. He's had a lot of down points, I see this as a reoccurring issue he has to deal with, and still, he finds a way out of it.

Perhaps his constant down points give him paranoia? I'm thinking with the amount of things Sonic has endured he'd be worried about losing you. Maybe not to the point of isolating you from the entire world, (I think Sonic would still let you speak to your friends under watchful eyes and listening ears) but he would make sure that he's always around and ready to protect you.

Yeaaaaah, that's about it. Let me know what you guys think! I'll probably work on writing some random drabbles about other characters, fanfics, y'know, the usual.

[headcanonsandmore]

Thasmin Fanfic Recommendations, a master post

Hi all! A fandom is at its healthiest when we share things, so I thought it'd be a good idea to share a list of all my favourite Thasmin (Thirteenth Doctor/Yasmin Khan) fanfics that I've read over the past few years. I'd highly recommend all of these. And, if you have any to add, please reblog with the links!

I Think You Might Like Me by Holie47. The Doctor asks Yaz to try and help her figure out what's going on and ends up coming to a realisation. Rated G for General Audiences. Cute Thasmin first kiss.

In This World Of Strangers I Belong To Someone by timetravelbypen. Autumn, 1904, London. Yasmin Khan is newly arrived in the city, eager to start the law degree she's spent so much time working towards. Determined to prove her worth to sceptical classmates and professors, she throws herself into her work. But a chance encounter with eccentric clockmaker Johanna Smith - and a mystery surrounding a progressive pamphlet written by someone called the Doctor - might just remind her she's worth more than her doubters could ever imagine. Rated T for Teen and Up Audiences. Edwardian!AU with human!Thirteenth Doctor. One of the best Thasmin fics I’ve ever read (if not THE best!). There’s also a series of short sequels which you can find here.

to know how it ends and still begin to sing it again (as if it might turn out this time) by  Eriadu (@eriadu-in-the-wildwood) and timetravelbypen (@timetravelbypen). They’ve been here before. The Doctor always sidestepping, always avoiding; Yaz always following, always hoping. But in a museum simulation of the 1906 San Francisco earthquake, confronted by an all-too familiar tragedy, the cracks begin to show. If they’re going to get out alive, something has to change. They’ve been here before… this time, can they make it through? Rated T for Teen and Up Audiences. Thasmin fic, set inbetween ‘Legend Of The Sea Devils’ and ‘The Power Of The Doctor’; some really interesting and in-depth characterisation for both Yaz and the Thirteenth Doctor, with some awesome sci-fi elements too.

Flying Lessons by timetravelbypen. A series of vignettes set between Ryan and Graham's departure in Revolution of the Daleks and the end of The Power of the Doctor. In which Yaz learns to fly the TARDIS, and learns just how capable - and how loved - she is in the process. Rated T for Teen and Up Audiences. Just a word of warning, to quote the author; “there is a reference to an attempted suicide/self-harm in line with its depiction in Can You Hear Me as Yaz and the Doctor encounter someone else in a similar situation and Yaz deals with some flashbacks. If you would prefer not to read that, you can skip Lesson Five: Controlled Fall.”.

falling down the stairs (of your love) by timetravelbypen. The gravitational pull Yaz has over the Doctor is unavoidable, inescapable. The Doctor is falling for Yaz... and the Doctor is also falling. Rated T for Teen and Up Audiences. Thasmin sweetness set after ‘Legend Of The Sea Devils’. Fluffy with a bit of angst; very sweet.

Two Idiots In A Box by timetravelbypen. Dan realizes quickly that, if left to their own devices, Yaz and the Doctor are never going to just talk to each other like functional adults. So he and the TARDIS hatch a plan. Rated T for Teen and Up Audiences. So funny and so sweet!

In fact, just read anything by timetravelbypen; they’re an amazing writer and understand these characters and Doctor Who so well! Their Tumblr blog is here; @timetravelbypen; send them some love!

Miniature #13 - The World Will Wait For Us by vaelerius. Yaz and the Doctor go on a totally-not-an-actual-D.A.T.E in Sheffield to Yaz's favourite restaurant. What could possibly go wrong? Rated G for General Audiences. Easily one of the funniest Thasmin fics out there; this is a good one to read when you want cheering-up.

You Have A Wife??? By LonelySpaceAce. Yaz asks the Doctor about something that she's been wondering about since they fought the Sea Devils. Rated G for General Audiences. This is written by one of my awesome Tumblr friends, so please check it out.

You Have Kids??? by LonelySpaceAce. Yaz learns that not all the Doctor's companions have been in love with them A sort of sequel to "you have a wife???”. Rated G for General Audiences. It also scratches my particular itch for having Thasmin with a side helping of Tegan/Nyssa.

(Un)familiar by EvvieJo. Yaz is trying to settle into her post-Doctor, UNIT life. Rated G for General Audiences. Less of a Thasmin fic per-say as opposed to a bit of closure for Yaz after leaving the Doctor, although it does have a lot of Thasmin elements to it.

The year of the cat by zurau. post-lotsd. thirteen disappears, again. a cat appears. it's some consolation. Rated T for Teen and Up Audiences. Funny fic about a mysterious cat that appears whilst the Thirteen Doctor has disappeared; you can probably guess where this is going…

Candy Floss And A Carousel by 13beautifulghostmonument. Team TARDIS make a festive stop over in Cardiff. Yaz and the Doctor finally admit to their feelings. Rated G for General Audiences. Very cute and sweet.

Courage & Stupidity by seaunicorn. Yaz was his best friend and, much like the Doctor, Dan would do anything for her. Four years marooned in the past can forge quite the friendship, and he would go to great lengths to protect her from anything, or anyone, that hurt her. Including the Doctor herself. After Dan learns what happened on the beach, he confronts the Doctor. Rated T for Teen and Up Audiences. Set after ‘Legend Of The Sea Devils’ and with some excellent character work.

giving up and giving in by seaunicorn. It takes Yaz almost dying for the Doctor to actually confront her feelings. Rated T for Teen and Up Audiences. Really sweet fluff and first kiss stuff.

All The Time In The World by Metal_Gear_Steve. Yasmin has developed feelings for the Doctor, but she isn't sure how to bring this up with anyone. Ryan and Graham have settled after their first few crazy adventures, so it's not like she can rely on the "adrenaline and whimsy" excuse to explain her standoffish behavior forever - sooner or later, she has to bite the bullet and confess her feelings to the Doctor. But there's so much that she doesn't know about the Doctor, and any number of factors could get in the way of a potential relationship. Will Yasmin's confession be successful? Is there room in The Doctor's heart for a new love after a multitude of relationships, most ending in disaster? Will Graham get to try that alien ice cream again, with what's-its-name seeds in it? I guess we'll find out - we've got All the Time in the World. Rated G for General Audiences. Some really wonderful fluff; super sweet.

Our Moment on the Beach by docwhovians. When Yaz and the Doctor find themselves held prisoner a hostile pirate ship, there's not a whole lot they can do except talk. Feelings that have been brewing come to a head. When the moment is interrupted by an order to walk the plank, things get interesting. Rated G for General Audiences. Really cute fluff with some pirate stuff.

A Home For The Holidays by mag_lex. In which Yaz and the Doctor visit Yaz’s family for Christmas after the events of the Flux, and Najia decides to intervene when she realises something is going on between them… Rated T for Teen and Up Audiences. Sweet domestic fluff and a little bit of angst thrown in (since it is related to series 13 of the modern series).

i will always hold you close but i will learn to let you go by jodieoswald. Yaz listens to Dan's advice, and takes the leap, hoping that the Doctor will listen. Rated T for Teen and Up Audiences. Angst with some fluff and a happy ending. Very sweet and tender.

The One With The Hen Do by isabrella. Yaz takes the Doctor to a friend's hen party to cheer her up. Rated T for Teen and Up Audiences. Angst with a happy ending; very tender. 

Confessions by SimpleSapphic. Set directly after Eve of the Daleks (and directly after thasmin becoming canon may I add akshakdhsksh), Dan does what Dan does best: he plays wingman to get those two to *finally* confess their feelings and actually do something about it. Rated T for Teen and Up Audiences. A fair bit of angst but with some really sweet fluff at the end. Gotta love wingman Dan!

The Lodger by bells_n_roses. The Doctor moves in with Yaz to investigate the mysterious upstairs lodger. As they spend more time together, however, feelings start to build. Rated T for Teen and Up Audiences. Very cute and sweet, but with some mild angst mixed in.

I Still Burn For You by timelostdoctor. Yazmin Khan and the Doctor's relationship has been over for ten months. Ten months in which they haven't seen or spoken to each other. With Sonya and Ryan getting married, they are both part of the wedding party. How can they find happiness for their friends when they both wish it was their wedding instead. Rated T for Teen and Up Audiences. Oooh, mate; this is one of the tenderest Thasmin fics I’ve ever read (complete with a human!Thirteenth Doctor); sweet with just the right mix of angst, and a good bit of humour as well! Always worth a read when you want something to get lost it (and, yes, I hope that Mandip Gill has read this one since she asked for fanfic recs).

Love is a lottery, and I’m betting on you by riptheh. The Doctor knows how it is with the female companions. Lived it dozens of times before. And this time, she's determined to make sure it doesn't happen. Or, five times the Doctor was so busy making sure Yasmin Khan didn't fall in love with her, she failed to realize that the opposite was happening. Rated T for Teen and Up Audiences. Tons of fluff, mistaken-for-a-couple, bed sharing, this fic has it all!

February by softestbutch. The Doctor stepped a little closer, still partially obscured from view, still animated in the quiet orange glow. ‘Oh, it’s a little silly,’ she said. Yaz raised an eyebrow for her to continue. ‘I can go,’ she said, and Yaz breathed an endeared laugh.‘What is it, Doctor?’ she asked. A pause. ‘It’s snowing,’ the Doctor said. In short: the doctor is incredibly excited about the snow, and yaz is incredibly in love with her. Rated T for Teen and Up Audiences. A cute fluffy fic about Yaz and the Thirteenth Doctor having fun on a snowy day.

Live inside my mind forever by timelxrd. Yaz fell asleep precisely ten minutes and thirty-two seconds ago. The Doctor knows, because it’s been ten minutes and thirty seconds since she’d had to consciously regulate her breathing and the rise and fall of her chest against Yaz’s soft cheek so not to jostle her. Rated G for General Audiences. Cute fluff about cuddling and hair-plaiting.

A trusted place to rest by multifanwho. After she manages a prison break, the Doctor finds herself exhausted with her feet carrying her to the one place on Earth she feels most safe. Rated T for Teen and Up Audiences. Fluff with a side ordering of angst.

Cuppa? by softly-penned-valkyrie (softly_speaking_valkyrie). The Doctor's slipping and she knows it. Everything's getting too much for the first time in thousands of years and she's finally having trouble coping with it mentally. How often does that happen? Following a double adventure involving the Judoon, incredible revelations and alien birds, it all becomes too much to handle, and when the TARDIS itself nudges at Yaz to go help the Doctor alone, it becomes a little too much for the copper too. But when the Doctor lands in Yaz's kitchen desperate for help, how can she refuse the woman she loves.... Rated T for Teen and Up Audiences. Fluff, hurt/comfort and some mild angst.

not-so-fake-feelings (and their very real consequences) by ActuallyMe. Yaz needs someone to pretend to be her partner whilst some really annoying family friends are in town. Turns out, the Thirteenth Doctor is happy to play along… Rated T for Teen and Up Audiences. Fake dating scenario, with some hilarious fluff.

astronomy in reverse (it was me who was discovered) by transboytwelve. Fake dating, bed-sharing, camping fic; Thirteen has to pretend to be Yaz’s partner for a family get-together. Hijinks and definitely-not-just-platonic confusion ensues. Rated T for Teen and Up Audiences.

Around The Rink by sheregenerated. The Doctor and Yaz get a bit competitive, Graham has some cocoa, and Ryan rides a reindeer (sort of). Rated T for Teen and Up Audiences. Cute fluffy goodness.

The Changing of the Seasons by rubyofkukundu. The Doctor gets her first period. Thankfully, Yaz is on hand to help. Rated T for Teen and Up Audiences. Fluff with a bit of hurt/comfort and humour.

Hooked on all these feelings by Moonlightkitten (orphan_account). In which Thirteen wants a set of earrings to match Yasmin's and won't take no for an answer. The only problem? She doesn't have pierced ears. Yet. Rated T for Teen and Up Audiences. Very sweet and very funny. The person who wrote this has since orphaned their account.

Erlebnisse by Val_Creative. The Doctor surprises a very ill Yasmin with a visit. Rated T for Teen and Up Audiences. Very cute and sweet.

I Met Her On The Beach by C1ashi1dr. While Graham and Ryan are taking a break from traveling, the Doctor and Yaz head for a relaxing day on the beach. Rated T for Teen and Up Audiences. Some really lovely fluffy goodness.

Trick or Treat by HalfBakedPoet. What do the court of King Louis XIV, a futuristic pumpkin-based religion, a secret pumpkin carving society, and a two-person horse costume have in common? The Doctor and Yaz celebrate Halloween in a variety of ways. Apple bobbing ensues. Leads up to (presumably, hopefully) the beginning of Flux. Rated T for Teen and Up Audiences. Some fun Halloween fluff.

Hope you all enjoy these fics; I know I certainly did! Remember, if you enjoy a fic, please leave a comment; authors love it when we recieve comments and it inspires us to create more!

[signfromeywa]

I have to say: I love your blog 🥰. I love everything, your OCs, the lore you show little by little, the interesting but fluffy couple dynamics. Etc etc.

I just came here to leave my opinión about Turner and Ana

I feel that, to a certain extent, Turner needed that avatar more than Ana. The circumstances in which he received it were not the best (oh Ana... 😭) But from what I understood from that little story you wrote, Turner was basically just hours away from dying, It's interesting to see how his character arc is basically that he was given a second chance to live and he must learn not to waste it and start a new and healthy one.

As for Ana... Her relationship with Ean'tu is interesting, usually in canon and fanfics involving a relationship between a Na'vi and a human, the human has an avatar that they then transfer to. I'm not complaining, but I feel like it's wasted potential to not explore a dynamic where the human STAYS human. We are talking about a romance that has every chance of failing... but it doesn't, that despite biological, physical and cultural differences, it prospered until it became something beautiful ❤️ even if it ends tragically 💔

Hello! Thank you for your kind words and all your thoughts about my characters 🥰 I am happy that you enjoy them and my blog!

To Turner:

Yes he needed that body even if he would never have dared to ask for one. He always thought he was not worth a second chance in life. He feels damn guilty that he has the body and the second chance and his friend Ana is not. This thoughts keeps him awake at night.

But also he learned to accept the new body and find joy in his new life doing the training from the Na'vi and Mo'at helping him, to accept the body. He needed a lot of spiritual training to get one with his body, because it was a traumatic event when he moved to his new body. It needed time to heal.

About Ana:

Ana and Ean'tu love each other despite the differences in species. She never had and never will get an Avatar. Ean'tu always said, he is aware that she is different, she is human. But he loves her the way she is. He fell in love with a human and thinks she is beautiful in the way she is. He doesn't want to change her. He wants the real Ana by his side.

Also Ana doesn't see the need in an Avatar body. Yes it's hard in Pandora that she can't breathe the air. Also the size difference and that she can't eat everything that grows on Pandora, but still she takes all that burden to be with her husband. To live along with him! She knows from the beginning she doesn't have an Avatar and that she falls in love with Ean'tu, a Na'vi! She knew that this would come with problems she has to overcome and she did! But still they can be together!

Even if they would offer Ana a Na'vi body, Ean'tu and Ana would not want it. He loves her like she is and she knows that he fully accepts her how she is. He loves her pale skin and her brown hair with the little pointy nose. He likes how elegant and filigree she is. He is madly in love with his human wife. And of course what really counts is the soul.

He would recognize and love her in every form and color. 💜

(also both are aware that she will not live as long as Ean'tu. But they still stay together and Ean'tu will be with her till she dies and he is prepared 🥺💜)

[orchideous-nox]

Fanfic recommendation query: Are you a good person to ask for a Rosekiller recommendation? Under 50k words, and complete? (if the answer is yes, could you tag the recommendation as... rosekiller trial?) I've never read a thing about them, and I'm interested in some good characterisations. I have a good shape of Barty in my head, but...

Absolutely! I have a few I've written myself in my masterlist but I love recommending other people's fics too so here's some that meet your criteria from ao3 (there are many more I could include that are either longer or incomplete so if you ever want more let me know!) I also have no idea if you are a minor...if you are then this is not the blog for you, I'm so sorry. This is 80% smut but the characterisation is still there.

my way or the highway by heartnipnops // nsfw // 6.1k words

While going on a road trip to visit Evan's sister, Evan learns just how much of a menace Barty can be when bored in a car. Luckily Evan spots an exit leading to a gas station with a bathroom not long after, allowing him the opportunity to teach his brat of a boyfriend a lesson.

sharpshooter by heartnipnops // nsfw // 4.7k words

After spending far too long unable to, due to Evan's strict rules during exam season, Barty finally gives Evan a rather sloppy and messy blowjob in the nearest bathroom after Evan's last oral exam. Barty's take on an oral exam turns out to be quite a bit more pleasant than what Evan had to deal with.

Closing Hours by MajorToast // nsfw // 3.8k words

A minimum wage job – one of the supporting pillars of consumer behaviour… and Evan’s personal hell. But – oh well – that’s what you’re getting for chasing the thrill rather than logic, or – in other words – sell crack to children. It’s a last-ditch effort for him to turn his life around, abandon his wicked ways. And it would have worked – hadn’t it been for his utterly stupid (and unfairly handsome) coworker, Bartemius Crouch Jnr.

Game On by MajorToast // nsfw // 4.9k words

To win Evan over, Barty needs to win the 2023 League of Legends Championship. A dare, that not only ends with a lesson learned, but also the fuck of Barty’s life. Two can play that game.

Love You Better by star4daisy // sfw // 11k words

the one where Barty and Evan try to love each other better in entirely different ways

Barty Crouch Jr. and The Terrible Inconvenience of Having a Fit Best Friend by localwolfgoesawooo // nsfw // 8.1k words

Barty is an emotionally repressed, oblivious prat, who thinks his best friend is the most gorgeous person in the world - in a strictly platonic way, of course. When a bloke Barty deems unworthy chats up Evan - makes him laugh - Barty inserts himself into their conversation. You know, since he’s such a good friend.

stoned off you (now i'm stone cold sober) by 214lilacsky // nsfw // 30.5k words

Barty Crouch Jr. is pretty sure he could go his whole life without finding love. Who needs it? He has Regulus, Dorcas, Pandora. He has a steady job, even if it is boring as fuck. He finally has a body he can stand looking at in the mirror.

One thing he absolutely cannot go without is consistent and reliable access to weed.

Enter: Barty's new dealer, Evan Rosier aka Rosie, aka the man who has got Barty down bad.

a double-edged sword by faun_writes_things // nsfw // 6.9k words

a double-edged sword (idiom); a situation with an equally good or bad outcome.

ex; barty hitting on the new next-door neighbor, who may or may not hate his guts.

Under A Spell, You're Hypnotized by spoonstars // nsfw // 3.5k words

Barty really wants to know how a dick piercing feels, so him and Evan brew polyjuice so he can find out.

Ant Pile by sommerregenjuniluft // nsfw // 21.3k words

This is a story about two boys raised by the sun.

Florida heat, being a teenager, best friends and how falling in love works when you've already loved them for as long as you can remember.

[deuxcherise]

Masterlist

A/n: So since I've gotten up to more than 10 posts now on the entire blog, I've decided to make a masterlist before the number of my posts becomes overwhelming. Still learning Tumblr... Okay! Here goes!

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[Current Status / Past Updates] - Link

Latest Update (November 15, 2024)

So compared to the last update, I'm not really on a hiatus anymore, but I am also not going to stick to an entirely consistent schedule due to time management issues and real life events (and sometimes just plain writer's block).

However, when I do post, it'll typically be on a Thursday around 5PM. Else if there is a special occasion, then I will post on those days- like a random example could be Pancake Day or official holidays like Christmas.

So yeah, that's pretty much it. I do appreciate and enjoy when I see readers come onto this space and show their love. Thank you so much, everyone! Love you all! 💕

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[Request Information] - Link

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[Original Content]

SFW / Slight NSFW

Collar Crimes

You are just a regular hard-working citizen of a corrupt city owned by many groups of scary people, but you make the best of it. That is, until you meet a bunch of people who may or may not want to kill you. One definitely wants to love you though... maybe two... or three...? Between love, obsession and crime, how will you survive? Ch 0: Red Letter Ch 1: Weasel In Ch 2: Cat Burglar Ch 3: All Bark, No Bite (1/2) | (2/2) Ch 4: Cat Got Your Tongue? Ch 5: Pop Goes the Weasel Ch 6: Self-Preservations Ch 7: Don't be Crabby Ch 8: [In hiatus...]

Look At Me

You may have endured cruelty and inflicted cruelty onto others, but there is one person who wants to do nothing but simp for his queen, you. He has only one simple request.

Breakin' Dishes

Your husband left you at home with a lot of breakable dishes and no entertainment. A dangerous combo. So you decide to make your own entertainment.

Honey

You find yourself in bed, unable to leave the embrace of your dear wifey, to go to work...

The Hare and the Fox

You are a noble fox and he is just a dumb rabbit you picked up from the middle of the woods, or so you think...

Feeling Blue

After a breakup (or ghosting, in this case), you spend some time in your feelings for a while... Just a little while though.

~~~~~

NSFW (all the random explicit spice!)

Depravity

Let Me Solo Him

Salacious

Deviancy

Sacrilegious

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[Fanfics]

~~Genshin Impact Stuff~~

~Ayato Kamisato~

Notice Me, Mrs. Kamisato! (unofficial title lol)

In which your husband, Ayato, tries anything and everything to get you to react in various ways to him. Part 1: Cats vs Dogs Part 2: Lend a Hand Part 3: Fear of Cucumbers Part 4: Brother vs Sister Part 5: [In hiatus...]

~Dottore~

Rebirth

The Doctor can't bear the subject of his upmost interest to leave him alone in this mortal realm... Part I & Part II

~Neuvillette~

Operation Otterly-In-Love

You, a young bachelor who was born to inherit your family's legacy, are more interested in capturing the heart of a certain hydro dragon.

~~~~~

~~Honkai Star Rail Stuff~~

~Sunday~

Sunday (Slight NSFW)

Sunday has decided to lock you up in a birdcage.

Sunday Pt. 2 (NSFW)

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[Other Stuff]

Imagines / Random Thoughts

Operation YAN

Thanks For Giving Answers [Soon...]

[acourtofmishapandmistakes]

What if Fedra and Rhys lost the baby and Nyx did not exist? I want the angstttt

(Also I know this is a sensitive topic, you don’t have to even consider it if it makes you uncomfortable)

Hey there! Thanks for being my first fic request - even if it is a dark one.

To be honest, I've never written angst before so this is new for me and may be very.... not great... but I tried my best at dipping my toes in. I did keep it on the shorter side just because I am learning how to best write angst/despair so feel free to give notes.

That being said, here is my interpretation of if Feyre and Rhys lost their baby and little Nyx hadn't become part of their lives.

Please keep in mind that everyone processes grief differently and this topic is incredibly heavy. Take what you can while taking care of yourself. Be kind and gentle with your mind and body.

Content Warning: Miscarriage/loss of a child

For more fanfics and writings check out my fic blog @a-court-of-fics-and-errors

Feyre sat in the armchair of the sitting room, her chin resting on her knees, curled to her chest. She leaned her head against the back of the chair, her gaze fixed on two raindrops racing down the window. The world outside was still cold as March melted into April, the days blurring together in a relentless, gray march forward. She felt as if time had ceased to hold any meaning.

She watched the smaller raindrop hit a long slide, racing quickly downward. The slightly larger raindrop followed, colliding with the smaller one, absorbing it, and continuing its path until it pooled on the windowsill.

The sitting room was dark, shadows creeping in from every corner, with only the cold, gray light from outside seeping in. Feyre closed her eyes, taking a deep breath in and out, allowing the world to close in around her.

Rhys stood in the entryway to the room, his forearm propped against the doorway as he looked at his mate. She was without color, the soft pinks of her cheeks reduced to a muted gray, her eyes sunken and faded, and her hair lay loosely around her shoulders. Nuala and Cerridwen had bathed her a day or so ago after she’d been sitting in the chair, unmoving. They told him she hadn’t spoken during her bath, only stared ahead, lost in her own mind. He had no doubt she knew he was standing there, but she lacked the strength to turn and look at him.

Rhysand considered breaking the silence, walking in, sitting down, and holding her. But instead, he turned and walked back down the hallway. That's how it seemed they were now, ghosts of each other, passing in the halls and never quite touching.

Rhys turned into his office, papers strewn about everywhere, untidied and listless. He sighed to himself and began gathering papers from the floor, snatching and balling them up, throwing them into the basket. After the first few, the balling and throwing became more intense. He started ripping pages, then stacks of pages, until he was breathing heavily, throwing them across the room, tearing books off shelves in rage, and ripping their spines. He continued until almost every book had been pulled from the shelves, standing in the middle of the room, panting, holding back a sob as he pressed his mouth and chin into his palm.

Azriel cleared his throat, and Rhys whipped around, suddenly aware of his outburst.

Rhys looked around the room and then back to Azriel, who looked nowhere but at him. “Now not a good time?” Azriel finally asked.

Rhys coughed, running his hand through his hair. “No, no, it’s-” he started, “it’s fine.” A pause. “Now is fine.”

Azriel gazed around the room. “You’re sure?”

Rhys moved towards him. “Yes, yes, please, come in.”

Rhys tossed a ripped book off the sitting chair, motioning for Azriel to sit down, which he did. Rhys took his usual spot in the chair across from him, sitting down and leaning forward, his forearms on his knees. Azriel just stared at him. Rhys pulled his lips into his teeth, rubbing his hands together, fidgeting as he waited for his brother to break the silence.

“How are you doing?” Azriel finally asked.

Rhys sniffled slightly before leaning back, running his hands up and down the lengths of his thighs. “I’m fine.”

Azriel looked at him as Rhys continued to fidget. “Are you?”

Rhys sniffled again, his left leg bouncing rapidly as he pressed his hands into his thighs, looking up towards the window where the rain ran down in droves, considering his answer.

Without words, Rhys pulled his lips into his teeth again, looking towards the floor and shaking his head no. Azriel looked at him knowingly. “I know.”

Rhys continued to shake his leg, feeling his eyes burn as tears filled them. He rubbed his nose with the back of his hand as he tilted his head to the sky, willing the tears back in and clearing his throat to avoid the sob. “Rhys-” Azriel started, “I can’t imagine what you’re going through.” Azriel leaned forward, bracing himself on his thighs.

Rhysand didn’t respond, still looking towards the sky, pressing his eyes shut as he shook his head back and forth and wiped his eyes.

Azriel continued, “None of us can,” a silent pause, “Losing a child, I-” he paused again, searching Rhys’s face for a response as he continued to bounce his leg and squeeze his eyes shut, “losing a child has to be the biggest heartbreak anyone can feel.”

Rhys, unable to speak, finally opened his eyes to Azriel, who looked at him with such sadness that it caught him off guard. Rhysand sniffled again, trying to find anything to say back. He finally got out, “I just don’t know what to do.”

Another pause, as the world shifted around them and time seemed to stop. “I don’t-” Rhys continued, “I can’t fix this.” He shook his head, casting his eyes to the floor. “I can’t fix this for anyone. I can’t fix it for her. I can’t-” He started to spiral, a sob stopping him as he let his head fall into his hands.

Azriel remained seated across from him, watching the High Lord sob and sob until his cries were merely silent. How could he respond to this? After months of waiting, expecting, and anticipating, of daydreaming and wishing, there had been no babe. Instead, there was a lifeless body, pulled from Feyre too early, and Nesta arriving just slightly too late, only being able to bring back one. No one blamed Nesta. If Feyre had died, Rhysand would have died too. But it seemed as though it was harder to live now than to die then, and Nesta felt responsibility for that, regardless of how much the rest of them had reassured her she had made the right decision.

“There’s nothing to fix,” Azriel finally said.

Rhysand shouted, “There’s everything to fix!” He stared up at his brother, his eyes bloodshot, hands out, almost pleading. “There’s- there’s so many moments I should have done something, said something. I just- it’s my fault it’s like this. I should have said something.”

Azriel never broke eye contact with Rhys as he wailed out the words of blame. “Rhys, you can’t do this to yourself.”

“What else can I do, Azriel? Tell me. What else can I do for her?” Rhysand pointed towards the sitting room where Feyre still sat, hearing the destruction in the office but not having the energy to move and check.

Azriel looked towards the room. “She is grieving. She needs time,” he reassured him.

“She can never forgive me. She will never forgive me,” Rhysand stammered out, dropping his head to his hands once more. “I failed her. I failed both of them.”

Azriel looked at his brother, a father whose child was stolen from him, and would never get to see the world. Rhysand, who had spent every waking moment for the last nine months thinking about this unborn babe, his hands constantly searching for his mate's pregnant stomach, smiling at kicks and praying to whoever was listening at night that both the babe and Feyre be safe. But it seemed the gods had left them.

Rhysand’s frantic eyes looked to his brother for any form of reassurance and Azriel stared back, unsure of what to say.

Suddenly Rhys stood, pushing his palms into his eyes as he sniffled through another sob, releasing a deep exhale. “Azriel,” He finally said, looking down towards him, “How do I move forward? How do I-” he paused, “How do I live like this when it feels like my body is burning alive, and like-” a sob, “like my heart was ripped out of my chest.” He looked towards the sitting room, “I can feel her dying in there, every day. I feel her, her whole body is screaming and tearing itself apart, her mind, it’s-” he brought his hands up, shaking them around his head, “it’s so loud and it’s so hateful, and she blames herself. She’s constantly screaming and she’s shattering and I can’t do anything about it.” He stared at his brother, who remained in the chair. “She hasn’t spoken, she hasn’t said anything since that day and yet inside she’s just screaming.” Rhys pulled back another sob.

“Have you talked to her?” Azriel finally asked.

Rhys looked at him, intensely, “What would I say?” he shook his hands and head in almost disbelief, “What would I say to her?”

Azriel waited, looking around the room before finding his brother's face again, “Anything.”

Rhys shook his head, stifling out another sob and walking to the window to stare out at the rain. From behind him Azriel said, “The world is very bleak for her. And she’s lost, Rhys. And you might not be able to tell her the way back, but you can at least find her in the woods.”

A few tears escaped Rhys’s eyes, sliding down his cheeks. He didn’t wipe them away. Azriel stood, walking towards Rhysand who didn’t turn until Azriel was next to him. Without saying a word, Azriel pulled Rhys into a tight embrace, rubbing his hand up and down his back as his brother sank into him,

letting heavy sobs escape his lips as he choked out wail after wail. Azriel held him, feeling his body rise and fall as he heaved out the incredible sadness kept in the deepest recesses of his body. Azriel held him until Rhys had found exhaustion and had lost all of the tears he could muster. Azriel held him.

Rhys pressed his forehead into Azriel’s shoulder as Azriel pressed a kiss into the side of his head. “I know,” he whispered. “I know.”

What felt like hours passed in a few minutes before Rhys finally pulled out of the embrace. Azriel took his brother's face in his hands, looking him deeply in his eyes before simply saying, “You have to find her.” Rhys nodded, his eyes shutting as Azriel dropped his hands to his sides, turning and silently leaving.

When Rhys opened them, he was alone in the room, surrounded by the destruction. He wiped his face clean, stifling another few sobs before exiting the office and making his way down towards the sitting room where Feyre sat in the same position he had left her. Mustering up courage, he stepped through the entryway, walking up to her and dropping to his knees in front of her. He reached out to touch her, to take her hand, and when he did she did not grip back.

He ran a gentle thumb down the length of her now bony hand. “I don’t know what to say. And I don’t know what to do.” Rhys finally started after silently searching for the words. Feyre didn’t turn to him, her eyes slowly blinking shut and back open as she continued to watch the rain outside. “I have so many things I wish I could do- I have-” he paused, trying to pull back the tears again, “I have so many things I want to do for you. To help you.” He shook his head, squeezing her hand, “But I can’t. I can’t fix this my darling.” He looked at her, as tears filled her eyes, but she still did not face him. “If I could take away this pain for you I would. If I could do anything, if I could meet with the Mother herself I would fall to my knees and beg her to bring him back to us. I would trade my soul to her just to make this different than it is now.” A single tear fell down Feyre’s cheek as he continued, “I would burn the world for you, my darling, I would-” He paused. “I can feel how you’re breaking, and I know that it hurts. I know that this is unbearable, and I don’t know what to do- I just- I don’t know what to do.” He shook his head, pressing his lips to her hand while he squeezed his eyes shut, tears flowing down them. “I should have done so many things, I should have said something, I should have-” He stopped, “I can’t take it back. I can’t fix it. But my darling, if I could, I would do anything just to bring him back to us. Just to have him here, even for a second.” He let out a sob, which was followed by another and another until he completely let go, “I’m so sorry,” he let out between cries, “I want him back.” Rhys let himself fall back as he pulled his legs to his chest, sobbing into his own hands. Feyre’s hand fell to the chair as tears fell in heavy succession from her own eyes.

“I wish he was here too.” Feyre finally said, her voice cracked and broken. “I want my little baby boy.” And with that she had finally broken. Her body heaved in sobs as she brought her hands to her face. Rhys, eyes wide at her response, finally realized what had happened and rushed to her side, pulling her close as he knelt by her. Her sobs mixing with his as he held her. She continued to repeat, “I want my baby back.”

Rhys pressed his face to her hair as she curled into his chest. “I know, Feyre Darling,” he cried into her quietly, “I want him back too.”

[the-unpopular-opinion]

Fan fiction writing and why you as a reader and writer need to care that what happens now is not right

And here is What The Popular WRITERS from THAT fandom taught me about fanfiction writing, and why I won't try that again

And The 10....More Than 10 Lessons I wish I knew earlier about fanfic writing in a fandom

Let me tell you my story....

I wish I've never posted, and if I knew, how the general new author is being treated around I most definitely would not. Or at least I would think twice....or more times.

I thought, that people are genuinely so supportive, to all and every author, by observing interactions between people.

Turns out .....They. Are. NOT.

THERE IS NO SOLIDARITY TO THE FELLOW AUTHOR ESPECIALLY IF YOU ARE NEW.

NO ONE CARES TO CHECK YOUR THING.

NO ONE CARES TO HELP.

NOTHING.

THEY GO TO THEIR FAVORITES AND PRAISE THEM PUBLICLY and all the time AND THAT’S ABOUT IT.

A LOT OF PEOPLE GIVE UP AND QUIT BUT THEY COULDN’T CARE LESS.

* I have seen authors write anonymously to other writers blog, asking for advice, after they have been trying a long time but have been ignored, discarded and etc. despite doing their best.  Trying to get into the writing guild, or telling their pain of being exhausted trying.

I never wrote to another blog, but it's horrible that there is not even a way to tell how disappointed you are. I wrote on mine, but none of my followers gave a f*, neither whoever else from the fandom, so I quit trying.

At the end: I got 2 kind messages from people, who were not even my followers. I'm greatly and forever thankful to them!

But nobody else cared anyway.

That's the most horrible part of it.

After being ignored for long, at the end there is no one to talk to about it.

-- Here what I've learned though. Go there on your own risk.

The following post contains: cynicism, sarcasm and correct facts. With a pinch of salt. If you are under the age that grants EMOTIONAL MATURITY  and critical thinking you may as well skip.

I would advise you to read it if you are a new author and want to post your thing or an author that had seen it with their own eyes....

AND IF YOU CARE ABOUT THE FUTURE OF FAN FICTION AS SUCH AND THE DIVERSITY OF IT, YOU NEED TO TRY TO ACT DIFFERENTLY.

OTHERWISE...THAT WON’T BE THE FIRST OR THE LAST FANDOM THAT WILL SEE THE CLIQUES AND ALL THE ELSE THAT COMES WITH IT.

One of the places I saw.....Not the fandom I come from but you get the idea.....

SO HERE.....

The 10..... More Than 10 Lessons, I wish I knew earlier about fanfic writing in a fandom

Lesson One

It doesn't matter how good you are.

You might be the finest author out there and write great and all......

and STILL get nothing under your fics ( or 10 to 20 notes mostly likes), no comments or engagement - no matter how good you are.

I say this,IN CASE you posted and got nothing, SO YOU to know that probably, 99,9% probably, IT’S NOT YOU.

And in  A LOT OF CASES - it DOESN’T GET BETTER WITH TIME.

I CAN’T TELL YOU IF IT WILL GET BETTER....because SOMETIMES IS DOESN’T AND SOMETIMES IT DOES.

That’s how most of the authors ( new authors and not-seen but good authors) GET TREATED IN GENERAL.

Lesson Two

The ONLY thing that matters is, who are your ...."friends".

And to make the right kind of....."friends", you need to BECOME A PROFESSIONAL SYCOPHANT, AND go on popular blogs TO EXERCISE EXCESSIVE FLATTERY, in hopes that you and your fan-fics will get noticed.

The hard truth:

You only become seen and/or  popular if popular blogs - the more popular the better - reblog you and recommend you.

Or if you have many ENGAGED WITH YOUR WORK friends and/or followers.

The catch is....that your followers and/or friends NEED TO CARE ABOUT YOU AND YOUR WORK, and reblog, comment and engage with it.

Otherwise it all empty numbers in a list that does nothing!

Side note: I, personally, would recommend going to REDDIT.

Those people know the truth, and we talk active authors, who fic write 10 years and more. The name of the fandom does not mater, because all this is in every fandom on tumblr.

Yes - it does happen. And no - it's not right but...no one else cares. Except me, and may be someone else I don't know personally.

However - I'm no part of any fandom, and am practically free agent with no moral obligation to sugarcoat s***t.

Here is me, leaving you clues. Anyways, I base that all on research that took a year and a lot of googling....so ...yeah

Back to our program:

So if you want to make....”friends” on the right places......

You need to heavily socialize, leave long sophisticated comments as if it is your day to day highs paying job in case you want to be an author.

AND IN CASE YOU HAVE ANY LIMITATIONS such as:

sensory overload

social anxieties

making friends is hard for you for one or other reason

anxieties of any kind

and etcetera

You have got yourself a problem.

And now about the writers guild here.....Ah, the writer guild - here what I have seen:

Lesson Next

The Other authors treat you like competition

*If that's not how you got treated - good for you.

In all other cases:

Unless you are in one of their friends circles they won't:

engage with you and/or your fics

even try to help in some way

They will keep to themselves and their groups.

And if you sink - you sink.

They couldn't care less about:

you being new, and needing the most of support only to gain some sort of visibility, other than 20 likes/ notes.

In fact - the less competition with fics, the better

99 % Silent treatment , 1% Else

If you get lucky.....You will know it.

Lesson Four

A lot of authors use their free fan fic writing, as a stepping stone to original books....which would sell.

And that means they try gather a following, that will probably buy their original books only because they were fans of their fic.

You will feel it.

That's why they treat you like competition in a first place.

Otherwise no one, could be so cold hearted, and just ignore cries for help by a fellow writer.

Unless it is a business or about something people need.

Unless you want to get rid of those people, and have less competition.

Not to mention that comment I read under someone's writing "If someday you publish a book I will buy it...."

And then watching that ALREADY HAPPENING as Someone else “published*”a book ( *welcome in the era of self-publishing), and now offered the said book, signed and etc.it as a “reward” in a “follower CELEBRATION” EVENT.

Yeah, it seems.

I will wonder no more why people act like they do.

Well I thought it's for fun....

There is no fun in stepping on others because you need to to do marketing for your (future) writing endeavors.

Some of us were there just for fun and sharing with like minded people.....But ah well.....

Lesson Next and even the last point aside....

As someone else mentioned,  some people may "reject" you simply because they secretly envy you.

Or perceive you as a "threat".

Or simply because...they don’t like you...or your avatar

( *shrug*)

No one however would tell you how they feel, they will "smile and nod" and then stab you in the back.

So BE AWARE.....

Lesson

A lot of authors will ONLY INTERACT WITH YOU, and your writing, no matter the quality of it, and with respect and consider you, IF YOU ARE A POPULAR  BLOG....especially popular writing blog.

It does not matter how good you write, or what good you do.

You may be a great writer, and a person, and they will still ignore you.

Because they ONLY need the POPULAR BLOGS SUPPORT.

BECAUSE....THEY ARE POPULAR.

Your support as  not-popular, means nothing to them.

Because, the only way to get higher in "fandom hierarchy" is to ...FLATTER and CATER TO POPULAR  writing BLOGS, in a hope than they will become friendly and/or recommend  your fic.

That's THE ONLY WAY  your fic to be read and seen.

And Unless you have a lot of engaged followers and friends is the other option.....

But the usual way is the fic/ fics to be recommended by others...and most importantly POPULAR OTHERS.

So that that type of writer blogs/ people -

will rather compliment, and flatter a bad  fic and writing BUT POPULAR author, THAN to  tell / recommend  anyone who is NOT.

As those authors aim to get seen themselves that's what they do.

Lesson

Being  POPULAR  does NOT guarantee a good writing or a GENUINE E PERSON BEHIND THE NAME

That's was the most disappointing of it all.

Lesson

BEING  POPULAR AND BEING GOOD IN WRITING, ARE TWO SEPARATE, AND COMPLETELY DIFFERENT THINGS to start with.

As I mentioned earlier....

I personally have seen "bad" writers get more notes. attention, a$$ kissing, and love by the fandom than good ones.

And if you ask why....I can't tell you because I don't have a clue.

-- On the questions of how to get into the writers circles--

There is NO guarantee that you will succeed though.

NO MATTER WHAT YOU DO.

Lesson

You need to be proactive in "making friends".

IMO - That "you must do this, or that or else" demand, is not a fun thing.  That "making friends because otherwise no one would read, you" is NOT a friendly activity.

It's more like mutual benefits. and that is not a friendship.

It becomes a barter - "read mine I will read yours" kind of deal, or authors gives what the crowd needs, because they do not read otherwise.

Once you go there, once you go to the barter side of it -because it's a barter-a fic material/s for engagement... and it becomes a "business".

Yes, no one pays you ( fanfics must be free copyright and all in mind).

But the time investment still stands. Both sides.

The readers though invests time for enjoyment.

And the writer......THE WRITER DOES THE WORK

THE WRITERS do all the work, including activities such like but not limited to:  

cold pitches = reaching to other blogs* not knowing what the outcome will be * mainly popular blogs*

marketing = bringing your fic to the attention of your readers

design = designing your dividers, mood boards, fic covers and etc.

investing time in it = writing  ( for free *)

And the problem:

if you can’t even get some attention - comments, reblogs, some talk or anything at all on your work - what's the point?

Investing time, no one will return you, in something that gives nothing back? Not a wise "investment"* (* fanfiction is free taking in account copyrights and al that. And should stay that way.)

Also such writing for online posting becomes:

Dull

Time wasting activity

It becomes HARD WORK

And hard work for nothing is NOT "fun"

No engagement = no fun

You may become bitter, and quit writing altogether

and etcetera

And it's supposed to be fun.

And as added bonus:  Business is where people would play dirty, if they need to. AND THEY DO.

P:S Don't get me wrong though. I'm sure that some people could find friends like that. But at large - it is not the right way to do it. And in general - not a good idea.

Lesson

Unless you are (already) popular, or have many friends, or belong to a large group, in which people support each other's writing, mostly  based on personal internal relations and friendships, or have exceptional people/social skills - you are doomed.

That's about it.

And in case you have any sort of social anxiety, get sensory overload  by too much online interactions, or have any other limitation...No one cares.

In general they do the silent treatment.

They may also rather discriminate, and then marking and covering  that up as "I owe no one nothing" if you try to say something. Or they would simply ignore all legitimate complains, or worries you may have.

Unless you are popular, have many engaged followers/friends and etc.  Then you get the special treatment.  

Ah, well. That leads to Lesson Next.

Lesson Next

There is no place where a new, or not so new authors can voice their concerns.Nothing organized and no one will show you to one even if it existed.

You either write ANONYMOUSLY on other blogs, preferably popular, or the fandom may exile you and other pleasantries, if you even try to point a problem.

Otherwise, if you are not popular, and you write on your blog, your posts would most likely:

get ignored - unless you have engaged followers

get no notes - unless you have engaged followers

Lesson

It doesn't matter how good you are, it only matters if you are at the right place, at the right time.

In other words, AT THE END,  if you have got the lucky, is all that matters.

And if you are lucky, you will know.

--And now and more lessons - fic wise--

Lesson

The only fics that are being written are x reader content.

Want to write OC?

Tough luck.

You try. Prepare for disappointment.

Don't theorize about it. Don't EVEN think about it.

DON'T.

Unless you are already popular, or have many engaged with your writing friends, or belong to large group in which people support each other writing...sounds familiar ?

My case: I wrote with not described, not named OC btw. I used "she" instead of "you". Got 10 likes, and people not giving a fuck. Based on other fics that were getting 90 and more notes and interaction mine was not bad. Nevertheless. No one cared.

Even popular writers, when writing with characters, and not 'x reader' fics, were getting less notes on their writing, compared to their x reader fics.

Lesson

No one wants to write what's not popular. And that leads to.....There is No diversity.

Because it would not be read, because the "almighty" readers, who  have the power to "praise and punish" with their attention.

And what for an author would write hours and hours only to be rejected.

Anyways here it is...

And that lead to LESSON NEXT

Lesson

EVERYONE WRITES TO WIN

also know as being seen fanfic author in a fandom. ( also as - Getting more than 99 notes on your writing)

There is no organic, natural interaction.

It's either mutual benefiting friendships

....quid pro quo AND only if you are lucky. A lot of people CAN’T even get that no matter how many times they recommend and read others...

Also servility and sycophancy

or you are on your own.

It's either praises on popular blogs, and in friend circles or complete silence.

But you may get lucky if you like gambling with the unknown. In that case - good for you.

And as winning - being seen and known author - is the one goal here, despite the fact what they will try to make you think.....

They will play DIRTY, if they need to.

AND THAT OFFERS NEXT LESSON ON ITS OWN:

Lesson

Sycophancy, Servility and Flattery  or

How to get into a writers friend circle as a new author

If You want to get in writers friend circle, a.k.a become a seen fanfic author, you do that by exercising general and/or high level sycophancy, servility and extreme flattery on popular blogs.

And it does not matter whether you really like what you read or not.

Note : You may, in fact, enjoy popular writers, some are very good. Some of them are genuinely good people too. But you need to be careful.

In the most cases. though.....

You need to:

write sophisticated comments

interact for hours, and as if it is your high-end paid everyday job -- 'cause authors love that s**t,

And if you don't do that - you don't exist, and they will forget about ya.

Also - you need to write ungodly amounts of fiction, BUT only one that fits their taste...otherwise...or ELSE.

And in short:

if you want to be seen as an author, and/or to become popular, you need to do it and be very social about it no matter if you have limitations of whatever kind. Otherwise no one will help.

Though.....There is the downside......

You may never get in one of those circles, no matter what you do, no matter how hard you try, and  for one reason or another.

EVEN if you do the sycophancy and flattery and servile stuff.

Even if you sell your soul, it may not happen and have the desired effect, because it's a question of luck.

So - choose wisely. Wanna play roulette with a loaded gun with all bullets present but one?  That's the odds.

Anyways, and in case you don't succeed to enter one of their circles:

Then you get ignored, because no one gives a f***** otherwise.

And you write, create and put efforts and time into nothing.

Unless you don't mind to be ignored, or you create and write nevertheless, and not for any attention.

Side Note: It's not about popularity as such  by the way. It's about a normal amount of attention, every creator needs now and then.

LESSON

EVERYONE  in the fandom is a “WRITER”. ALSO AVID READER AND WRITER COMBO

Which you may or may not be.

And even if you comment under other people fics and recommend, you may NOT get anything back.

( I saw many people say that while I was searching ....)

That’s why I said that all that sycophancy and friends with benefits is bad....

It becomes work you need to do for some reason other than enjoying writing and reading fiction and communicating, and it becomes messy.

._.

--Lessons about characters--

Lesson NEXT

The People in the fandom, have and are entitled to a group, fandom-shared, pre-conception of what behaviour certain characters of the actor NEED TO EXHIBIT in the fiction written, in order to be acceptable in writing.

You either write a lot of what they need, want, crave and etc. otherwise - no one reads you, if you do not comply.

And never, in no case, don't you dare to forget. that you the writer MUST, in all and every case, to write ALWAYS and ONLY, with "YOU"......or else.

They punish by ignoring, exercising their "right" to do whatever, and in this case exercising their "right" to ignore, and do the the silent treatment, because what for ill-meant audacity is you- the writer, to offer something for diversity.

( /sarcasm intended. And please think for yourself why such behaviour is UNACCEPTABLE).

It does not matter, if you have an interesting story.

Unless you are lucky, and get the jackpot like that one person I followed.

Or unless you only create what they think the character should be like, and a lot of it.

(Or unless you are backed by a lot of people who love all you do.)

In all other cases - you are doomed to fail.

Here more about the characters.

Examples:

* Markus Pike is a sweetheart.

I saw a fic about a "bad "Marcus once. It had 42 notes. The usual amount of notes, that this same author was getting on their fics was about 800 and more.....

Next - The EQ 2 character.

Oh dear. I can talk about that for hours. Don't even get me started.....

He is usually perceived as rude and mean. And is always like 99,9 % always dominant. The mean, rude, heartless dominant kind of them.

He usually spits....on things, cheats his wife, bangs the babysitter, calls you a wh******, and he is possessive and all that.

And sometimes he is abuser and that kind of thing. And sometimes there are fics about him being submissive. And they allllll ( except some) are in some sort of Pit.

And that's it.

No other men on tumblr.'s fanfiction All Dominant. The rude kind. All into BDSM dynamic. That's it.

--

Side Note: I don't have problems with dominant characters!!!!! And I don't have problems with personal preferences and kinks.

I do however have problem with the lack of diversity. Because there is NO diversity.  

People from the dominant spectrum, come in varieties as  everyone else. Also people as a whole are different.

Lesson Unless you follow the unwritten rules of THAT writing fandom, you are doomed as new writer.

Or unless you get lucky...whatever you have, and get.

Have an genuine author need to write something out of love or whatever ?

You better be popular, or have a large friends and/or followers circle.

And last, but not least:

CLIQUES.

Cliques everywhere

Wanna genuine high-school rejection feeling?

You are on the right place.

So that's that.

If you did any of those, and you've succeeded, you are probably:

already in a writers friend circle and you "enjoy" fics and friendly talks with your writer friends

and/or are seen author.

Good for you. Congratulations for things working ot in your favour

----------Otherwise--------------

Welcome to The Void of The Ignored -- We don't have fun here.

-- Thank you for reading my observations and  for the utmost patience. Thank you for not getting offended by my cynicism and sarcasm. My intention is not to "offend".  I don't like to be rude.

But to point out things that need fixing

In conclusion -

I don't think that this way of behaviour is welcoming to new authors or authors who may have limitations - like social anxiety, sensory overload for one reason or another, or anything else on that note that makes it harder for them, to be authors under your ruler ship.

I personally won't ever post fan fiction online, especially in this community.

But if you, whoever read this all, think you can handle the rejection and the pain that comes with it - You are welcome to try.

Your time, your life.

And If you are lucky, you may have it better.

I however won't do that again. I only felt like my duty to leave a warning.

Because no one warned me, and I needed counseling because I got PTSD because of all that ( and not only). That's what they told me.

So my rating personally:

- 10000000 stars Would NOT recommend.

--

Disclaimer :

As I mentioned, that's how I was treated and what I saw. Also apparently, that's a standard way in which the writers on tumblr behave as a whole. ( by doing some research you find some very interesting and unsettling things. )

P:S I put so many disclaimers and side notes, because the last time I tried to states something politely, that was my opinion, and my feelings, with me being in a state of depression because of that "fine treatment" no one warned me about,  it was taken as "offense" - which it was not.

See my rules of online conduit and behaviour here. Ones I adhere to, and I never go against.

I believe in common courtesy, thank you.

I apologize, if that is too old-school to you.

That resulted in me being dumped by my EX-fave, content creator. Because their bestie got "offended", that they were no longer able to use my deleted content for their fic. And they were a heavy user of  my content. I wonder though, and what if I was the one who had 2000 followers, not the other way around....what it would be then?

And for the record - I DON'T PARTICIPATE IN friendship triangulation. Whoever wanted that, was NOT me.

--

Also - I won't tolerate to be "punished" for having an opinion.

One, stated in not rude manner. I ALWAYS try my best not to be rude.

But seriously, some people get offended, if you do not think like them, and that's childish at it's best.

[vashbug]

Just As Human

Hello, this is my first post on this Trigun side-blog. This a fanfic that is Vash x GN Reader, with the Vash specifically from Stampede, from before the last episodes :’) I hope you enjoy.

Read on AO3: Here

You sit at a campfire in the middle of nowhere, cooking worms and whatever rations you could into a meager stew. You offered to cook, given you’re the best out of the group at these sorts of things, and you really don’t mind having something to concentrate on. The others stand near the car, chatting about what to do next, and you can barely hear them over the crackle of the fire. You’re so concentrated on the task at hand that you don’t notice when a familiar figure sits down near you. He is quiet as he watches your face in the firelight, the flames reflecting off his yellow-tinted glasses.

He coughs quietly, startling you and making you drop your ladle into the pot with a clink.

“Vash!” You clutch your chest, trying to slow your heartbeat. “Don’t scare me like that, oh my god.”

He chuckles and gives you an apologetic smile. “Sorry,” he says, “I didn’t mean to frighten you. I just came over to see how you’re doing.”

Every time he is around you, you can’t seem to calm your nerves. “I’m doing alright, dinner is almost ready. I know it’s not much but…” You trail off as you reach your hand towards the pot to retrieve your ladle. For some reason, your hands are trembling slightly, and you miss the ladle and touch the tips of your fingers to the hot rim of the pot. You let out a yelp and pull your hand towards you.

“Are you okay?” Vash is at your side the moment you make a sound, kneeling in the sand next to you and taking your hand in his. “Let me take a look.” He inspects the tips of your fingers closely before taking out a flask of water and spilling it over your hand.

The concern in his voice makes your face hot. It feels crazy to you that he, an immortal being, cares so much about humans, or you. He fusses over your burned fingertips and you can’t seem to look directly at him.

“Does it hurt a lot?” He asks, and then without waiting for an answer, he begins blowing air onto your burns. This gesture makes your heart practically leap out of your throat as you fall backwards into the sand with a yelp. He looks startled at your reaction, and then he chuckles bashfully, running his mechanical hand through his hair and looking down. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to surprise you, I thought it would help. Are you okay? You seem a little on edge.”

You take a moment to gather your senses before returning to a kneeling position next to him by the fire. “I’m fine! The burn isn’t even that bad, it doesn’t really hurt.”

He’s having a hard time understanding your behavior, and you feel bad that you’re making him worry. You realize this and muster up the courage to look him in the eyes as you hold up your burnt hand and say, “See? Everything is in working order.” You smile as you wiggle your fingers.

He breathes a small sigh of relief and gives you a small, apologetic smile. “Okay, if you say so. Let me know if it starts to hurt more. Are you okay to keep cooking?”

You turn back to your pot, thankful for an excuse to look away. “Yes, I’ve got it.” Your heart is still beating hard in your chest.

Vash sits back a little and continues to watch you stir and add ingredients. You can feel his eyes follow you and pretend that you don’t notice. It’s quiet for a while before either of you say anything.

“You know,” he begins, “I’ve met a lot of humans, and every single one of them knows something different. I’m always learning, I guess.” He chuckles softly. “No matter how long I’m around, I doubt I’ll ever meet two people that are exactly the same.”

You laugh softly. “I doubt I have anything new or interesting to offer. I can’t fight, I’m not particularly strong, and all I can do is follow everyone else around, really…” Your words trail off as you feel a hand gently tug on your shirt from behind.

“That’t not true.” Suddenly his tone is serious, and you find yourself turning to face him. “That’s not true,” He repeats. When you look behind you, he is leaning forwards, knees on the ground, arm still outstretched and holding onto the back of your shirt. His face is serious, almost determined. He sits upright with his hands on his thighs. “You shouldn’t talk about yourself like that. You might not be any good in a fight,” You wince internally at this remark, “But you’re strong in other ways. You…” He pauses, averting his eyes. “I wish you knew that. And I wish you knew what you mean to me.” His face is red now, and you’ve never seen him look this shy before.

You feel guilt rise in your chest in place of your embarrassment, and you turn fully to face him, your back to the fire. “I’m sorry, Vash. It’s just that everyone else here is so much stronger, and they can use weapons. I’m really just a regular human.”

“But you’re not!” He replies immediately, his voice raised slightly higher than before. The others look over, and Vash looks slightly embarrassed as he continues in a softer tone. “You’re not just a regular human. I mean, no human is just ‘regular’, but you, you’re special.” He flushes red. He begins again, his hands moving as he talks. “You’re special to me. It’s been a long time since anyone told me that I deserve a normal life, maybe even a happy one.” He begins to ramble. “And you’re always taking care of everyone, and making sure they eat, and you’re honest, but in a nice way, and you make me feel-“ He catches himself. “You make us feel like we’re… Somewhere like home.” He is starting at you with that determined look on his face again.

You’re sure you’re bright red by now, and you do your best to keep your face composed. Vash is looking at you expectantly, and you know you have to say something, but your heart is in your throat. Your thoughts race as you consider what to do next. You reason with yourself, no, you can’t do this, don’t fall for him, he’s practically immortal, he’s on another level entirely. Besides, there’s no way he could love you… But god, you want to reach out to him so badly your hands itch. You imaging grabbing his face in your hands…

Instead, you swallow your heart and look down at your lap.

“You’re right, I know I’m too hard on myself. But I want to become stronger so I can stay with all of you.” You look at the burns on your fingers and sigh. “But thank you, I know you really mean it.” You flash him the most convincing smile you can manage.

This seems to satisfy him enough to drop it, but his gaze is still locked on your face. You can’t really tell what his expression means. Hurt? Disappointment? It hurts so much to have him look so directly at you that you have to look away. You turn back to the fire, back to your purpose here, and finish your task for the evening.

***

Later that night the fire has become dim, and everyone has settled into their tents or sleeping bags. Vash is sleeping in the back of the trailer, hands placed lazily behind his head. Or at least you think he’s sleeping. You realize you left your warmer coat in the car, and the night is chilly without the fire. You are on your way past the trailer when a quiet voice nearly sends you stumbling into the sand.

“Hey,” You hear Vash shift around slightly in the back of the trailer, but he’s still looking up at the sky. He hears you trip and gasp, and lets out a soft chuckle. “Sorry again,” he whispers, “But you should come up here, I want to show you something.”

You make your way clumsily up the side of the trailer, careful not to make too much noise. Vash doesn’t look up as you sit cross-legged and awkward next to him. Instead, he points up at the sky.

You look upwards and it takes everything in your power not to gasp. Millions—maybe billions—of worms, floating and flying around in a swarm far above your camp illuminate the sky with a beautiful, soft green light. You’ve never seen anything like it, usually staying close to the fire and low to the ground when you camp at night. You can’t hide the look of awe on your face and you take in the sight. For a moment, you forget about Vash laying next to you.

You don’t realize he’s not looking at the sky anymore. He’s studying your face instead, his gaze soft and admiring. He likes that you are able to see that there are beautiful things in this world, things that many others don’t take the time to notice. He likes that even though you have been through so much you are still so kind.

“Come on, lay down next to me. Your neck will hurt otherwise.” His voice sounds a little eager, but he’s hiding it well. You don’t hesitate this time, leaning back and settling down next to him about a foot away. You are careful to put some distance between the two of you. He’s quiet for a while, looking up at the sky, lost in thought.

When he finally speaks, you can hardly hear him. “I meant what I said, you know.” You turn to look at him, but he’s still looking at the sky. “You don’t give yourself enough credit.” He turns his head to face you, and suddenly the foot of space between you doesn’t feel like enough. Your heart beats so loud you swear he can hear it too. “I understand, kind of, how you feel.” He gives a soft laugh. “Well, maybe not exactly. But I know I’m too hard on myself and that I blame myself for things that weren’t my fault. At least, now I know.” His gaze is so warm, it’s almost too much for you. “Thanks to you.”

“Vash…” You say his name so quietly it’s barely a whisper. There is no denying it now, that look he’s giving you. Like he cares about you, like he admires you. You turn your face back up towards the sky and try to drown the hope you feel rising in your chest. You don’t say anything for a long time, instead focusing on the sky and your thundering heart. After a while, you realize how cold you are, and you feel yourself begin to shiver.

Vash notices that you’re shaking immediately. “Hey, are you cold?” Before waiting for an answer, he sits up and strips off his red jacket, placing it over you in a single fluid motion. You nod and smile as a thank you, but your teeth are still chattering. You sit up awkwardly, pulling his coat around your shoulders.

“That’s still not enough, huh.” Vash leans back against a crate and motions for you to come closer. He has his arms open, and the look on his face is inviting you to sit against him. “I really don’t want to be responsible for you freezing tonight,” he chuckles.

You hesitate a moment before the cold wins against your better judgement and you settle with your back against his chest, his coat still wrapped around you. Suddenly, you feel really small. His arms are strong as they wrap around you, and you can feel his mouth close to your ear. You can feel his heart beating behind your back and wonder if all plant hearts beat this fast.

You sit with him, trying to concentrate on the sky. His thumb absently rubs against your arm, and every movement makes your heart palpitate. Despite your best efforts, you notice every breath he takes and the slightest shift in weight against your back.

“I want you to stay with me,” He whispers, breaking the silence. His voice is so close to your ear it makes your hair stand on end. “It might be dangerous, and you can say no, but I’d like for you to stay with me.” He laughs, and this time it sounds a little forced. “I know it’s selfish, that I’m being selfish and I should tell you to stay away. But…” He pauses and takes a breath. “I think you’re good for us. I think… You’re good for me.” He exhales, as if he is relieved that he finally said it. “You make me feel almost human.”

You debate whether or not you want to look up at him over your shoulder. You are burning hot and your heart feels like it might escape from your chest. You so badly want to see what kind of face he’s making that curiosity finally wins out and you look up at him.

He’s making an expression you haven’t quite seen before. It’s the same kind of look he gives people when he feels like he’s let them down, almost apologetic, but softer. You can tell he’s waiting for you to say something. “What… What are you saying, Vash?” Your voice sounds high-pitched and strained.

“I’m saying,” He begins, reaching down and sliding his hand over the back of yours, locking your fingers in his, “That I want you to stay. With me. We can travel together, we can keep running. I know it’s a lot to ask, but I promise that I’ll protect you. I’ll take really good care of you and make sure that you’re always safe.” He squeezes your hand gently, as if to reaffirm that he means it. The expression on his face, his closeness, the softness of his voice—all of it is making your head swim. You realize, for the first time, just how much you love him.

This realization opens a flood gate within you, and suddenly, you can’t take it anymore. You twist slightly and bring your free hand up to his face, cupping his cheek in your palm. He looks surprised, but you don’t give him time to say anything else before you press your lips to his. He stiffens, immediately letting go of your other hand. For a moment he doesn’t seem to know what to do with himself, but quickly he relaxes, reaching his hand up and gently lacing it through your hair. He melts into your kiss, and it is a long moment before you pull back to look at him. He looks at you like he doesn’t understand know what just happened, and you realize what you’ve just done.

“Oh my god…” You bring a hand to your mouth in disbelief. “I can’t believe I just did that. I’m so sorry, I just- you’re just so-“ You aren’t sure what to say. “That’s so funny, I think I hear someone calling me.” You make a weak excuse as begin to untangle yourself from his lap and his coat. You’re embarrassed, and he is sitting there, stunned and breathless.

You get halfway to your feet before you realize he’s grabbed your hand, cold crystal pressing against your palm.

“Wait, look at me.” He doesn’t pull on you, and he is holding your hand so gently it feels like he’s worried he’ll break you. You turn to look at him and his eyes are clear, bright, and serious. You’re entirely sure you look like a deer caught in headlights, eyes wide with panic. “I know it seems crazy, and I know I don’t deserve it, but would you please give me a chance? I want you to be with me.” His voice sounds slightly unsteady. You’re taken aback by his forwardness—his willingness to say what you wouldn’t dare to.

“Give you a chance?” You scoff in disbelief, and he immediately looks hurt. “I’m just a human, a human that can’t do more than stand on the sidelines and offer a few words of encouragement. And you,” you gesture vaguely at him, “You are a plant, you’re powerful, you’re unique, you’re clever, and you’re so… so…” You trail off as you search his face, trying to decide what to say next. He looks wounded at your words. His head falls, and his hair covers his face.

“I get it, I know. You don’t want to get caught up in the Humanoid Typhoon. I can’t blame you for not wanting to be anywhere near me.” He releases you hand and when he looks back up at you, he is wearing that same strained, apologetic smile he always does. “It’s okay, you don’t have to stay with me. You can travel with me for as long as you want, and move on when you need to.”

You stand in front of him under the glow of the worms and look carefully at him. You’re used to looking at his back in front of you, whether he is shielding you or leaving you, that to see him in front of you now makes him seem so much *smaller*, and so much more *human*. You feel a pang in your chest and you realize something.

You realize that he’s just as human as you, whether he lives forever, or has powers you can’t understand. He loves people, and he loses them, and he makes mistakes, and he carries that guilt with him everywhere he goes. Just like you. Just like any other human. Your heart pounds loudly in your chest. He’s just as human as me.

“I was going to say that… You’re so beautiful,” you manage to whisper, your vocal cords tight in your throat. His head snaps up and he looks at you, bewildered. “You’re beautiful a-and you’re clever, and you’re also so stupid,” you say with a laugh. “I was worried that maybe you were too plant, and that I was too human, and how could someone like you care about me, and there are so many things to consider…” you’re rambling, looking at your hands as you talk. “But I realized that even though you were born a plant, you’re just as human as me-“

He doesn’t wait for you to finish. He’s on his feet so quickly you hardly see him move. You barely have a moment to register that he’s grabbed your face before your lips connect. He is firm but gentle as he pulls you closer to him, until your chest is pressed against his. His lips are soft against yours, and your skin is so hot you can barely stand it. You reach your hands up and wrap them around his neck, bracing yourself against him like you might collapse without his support. The kiss lasts until you can’t breathe anymore and you have to pull away. He rests his forehead against yours, eyes closed, and lets you have a moment to breathe.

“I’m sorry,” he laughs lightly. “I couldn’t take it anymore.” He brings his real hand up to your face, the mechanical one still wrapped around your waist. “I don’t care that you’re human, and I don’t care about how long I’ll live, and how long you’ll…” he lets the sentence die in his throat. “I know my life will never be normal, and we have so many things to talk about, but I don’t want to lose you.” It is one of those moments where he looks so much weaker and younger than he actually is, and you feel like you’ll be the one to break him.

You let out a breathy, shaky sigh. “Well, we won’t know unless we try. I mean,” you chuckle softly. “I was going to be traveling with you anyways. It’s not like I have anywhere to be.” You wrap your arms around him tighter, pressing your face into the crook of his neck above his collar, where you kiss him lightly. You feel him startle slightly. “I already knew that my life would be different since I met you, and I was aware of the danger.”

He laughs quietly, almost ruefully. “If you get hurt while you’re with me, I’ll never forgive myself.” His hand is on the back of your head now, holding you against him. You can feel that he’s holding you as tightly as he’ll allow himself.

“Then you’ll just have to teach me how to defend myself.” You smirk into his neck. “I’ll have the privilege of learning marksmanship from the one and only Vash the Stampede.”

“Ha, ha.” He lets out a mocking laugh. For a while you both stand there, pressed into each other. You’re not sure how long you stay like that before he whispers, “Maybe we should get some sleep and talk more about this tomorrow.” His voice sounds meek, but hopeful.

You pull away so you can look at his face, and you realize for the first time how red he is. It’s so cute you almost can’t stand it.

“Okay,” you say. You can’t help yourself, and you lean in for another kiss. This time it is much softer, and less passionate, but for some reason it makes your heart race even faster. You decide to stay in the back of the trailer with Vash for the night, regardless of what the others will think in the morning. The two of you settle down under the glow of the worms, your back pressed into his chest, his face in your hair. You’re not sure if you’ve ever slept this well in the desert.

[choicesficwriterscreations]

September 2023 WOTM: lilyoffandoms

Each month CFWC highlights one of our talented fanfic writers, and this month’s writer of the month is @lilyoffandoms. We hope you will enjoy learning more about them and their work below! The writer is selected at random. More info can be found on the navigation page.

This month's Writer of the Month was selected a little differently than normal. We announced that we would be selecting the WOTM from the participants in last month's Writer Appreciation Event. But the eleven writers involved all agreed the honor belonged to Lily. Lily has been a staple in the Choices community for so long, and they continuously go out of their way to support creators and spread positivity while continuing to inspire and create themselves. We couldn't think of anyone better suited for the honor, so please join us in congratulating Lily... September's Writer of the Month!

Quick Links:

Tumblr Blog Name: lilyoffandoms Blog Masterlist

How do you want to be known on Tumblr? Lily is fine (they/them preferred)

1- When did you start playing Choices? What was the first book you played? 

Best guess would be back in January of 2018. It was a joke at first since a friend saw one of their god-awful ads and said we should both try it. Next thing you know, we were both arguing over which books were better and regretting our decision to start. Though their opinions on what constitutes good books are almost as bad as the Choices ad that got us to jokingly play (and I say this most lovingly because they are awesome and I love them). I started with Most Wanted, and my friend started with The Freshman. 

2- When and why did you join Choices fandom?

Oh gods! I joined back in March 2019. I know I’m a Tumblr baby by most everyone’s standards, but that feels like a really long time. I joined when Open Heart book one was released. I had lurked, reading fanfics, for a few months before biting the bullet and creating a blog and actually posting. Only joined because I was taking my editor’s advice and writing something entirely outside my norm to break a particularly bad case of writer’s block. Thought I might as well share those silly things if I was taking the time to write them. Maybe someone would enjoy them. Never did plan on sticking around, but found so many lovely people that I’ve come to call friends.

3- How did you pick your blog name? 

It was lilyofchoices. My name + Choices because I am super creative like that with those sorts of naming things 😅 I changed it to lilyoffandoms when I left the Choices fandom for a bit. I’ve thought about changing it more times than I can count but I can’t bring myself to actually follow through on it. How do y’all’s change your blog name with each new book release? You are a crazy different breed of tumblr and you fascinate me.

4- Pull up the first post in your archive, and tell us about it!  

I deleted the first one years ago. It was my first drabble. Currently, as it stands, the first thing in my archive is this post about Desire and Decorum, and it still makes me giggle.

5- How long have you been writing fanfiction?

I’ve only been writing fanfic since I joined Tumblr. I never really tried writing fanfic before that. Some nonfiction personal things before that but never anything like this world. It's been an adventure, to say the least haha

6- What is your favorite Choices book, and what is your favorite Choices book to write about?

My favorite book is probably Blades of Light and Shadow, book one, but there are plenty that are really close behind. This is also the book I’d say I enjoy writing for the most because it is my favorite book, contains my favorite LI, and has one of my favorite OCs (Maiele) in it.

Though recently, I’ve been writing more for Crimes of Passion because it's more of a challenge for me. It's a different vibe between the MC and the LI and it's one I don’t often explore so I’m here for that right now. But I have a sneaky suspicion once Blades 2 drops I’ll be back on my bullshit with that again.

7- Share the first fanfic you wrote with us. Do you still like it, or would you change it if you were writing it today?

I don’t think it exists on this site anymore. Maybe in someone’s reblog? I still have it in my files. It was an Ethan x MC drabble featuring my MC, Merida. I still like it. I’d not change it cuz I’m a firm believer in writing it and don’t look back haha.

This is it:

He swallowed the lump forming in his throat, trying to hold back the tears that were threatening to form in his eyes. There it was. He had told her. Dr. Banerji was dying and Ethan was at a loss as to what was ailing his mentor and friend. Ethan stared at the young woman in front of him and then to the floor. He cleared his throat and made a small motion to turn back into Naveen’s room but froze instantly the moment he noticed her take a step towards him.

She threw her arms around him and hugged him, wishing to take away all of his pain, all of his loneliness. Silently willing him to understand that she cared for him. Cared deeply for him and much more than she should. “Ethan. I’m so sorry,” she whispered, one hand stroked through his hair while the other grasped his neck and slowly bent his head toward her shoulders as she raised herself to her tiptoes to meet him halfway.

He tensed upon feeling her arms around him. Arms, he thought to himself, that he had imagined holding him for a number of weeks now. Ever since that night spent sitting up with her watching little baby Ethan. “Merida,” he sighed as he gradually relaxed into the embrace.

She didn’t let up on the hug, squeezing him to her just a bit more tightly. God, she had wanted to comfort him when Dolores died but she didn’t know how he would respond. Now, he was facing the possibility of another friend dying and she couldn’t help herself.

He responded to the increased pressure of her hug and tightened his own hold upon her. Finding himself tracing circles up her spine and imagining what it would feel like to move his hands to tease along the skin of her back where her pants met her shirt.

Her breath caught when she felt his hands move lower. No longer making gentle movements along her spine but increasing their pressure upon her body, nearly massaging their way lower. She brought one of her own hands around to his chest, lightly bunching his white coat in her fist to try and pull him closer to her.

A loud crash echoed down the hall. “Shit!” a construction worker cursed. The two doctors jumped back from each other both staring into each other’s eyes seeming to question if they had both felt the same in the other’s arms. She blushed slightly. “I should see to my other patients. Dr. Banerji’s condition stays between us. Understand, Rookie?” he stated, his eyes narrowing. She nodded and he turned and marched down the hall.

8- What is your favorite fic that you’ve written?

I love asking this question of others but don’t like it asked of me. I’m so bad at self-rep and advertising my wares 😂 But if I had to pick one, I’d say this one. It was so far outside my comfort zone when it came to writing that I almost abandoned it two paragraphs in. But I’m a stubborn person, and I refused to let it beat me. Plus, I had been wanting to write a noir fic for this book since it was released. Furthermore, I adore Hayden’s work too much not to gift a little something back for all the art he shares with us, so I knew I just had to make it work.

9- Do you have a fic that you didn’t expect to be well received, but it was? What about one you expected to be but found could use a little more love?

I didn’t expect last year’s Luck of the Draw fic to garner much love. Attention? Maybe. But not love and definitely not the response I got. I really enjoyed writing that one. 

10- If you could write only angst, fluff, or smut for the rest of your writing life, which would it be and why? 

Fluff. I’m a sucker for happy-ever-afters and an endless hopeless romantic. Give me the fluff. All the fluff. 

I pull a lot of what I toss into my silly drabbles from real life. Always been a believer in writing, most often what you know, and sprinkle that all with a dash of the stuff you don’t as a treat. And my life is pretty fluffy thanks to my incredible partner. 

However, I do so adore angst I’m just not able to write it often because it hurts more to write. But I’ll always always read it. That pain is *chef’s kisses*

11- Do you ever recognize yourself in any of your MCs or in your writing?

Maiele, my Blades MC, is most definitely me coded. His whole personality, his choice of partner when it comes to personality, his constant flirting with said partner, his sense of humor, his lack of a filter most times, it’s all pretty much me. Gabriel, my CoP MC, is me when it comes to romantic gestures and Valentine’s Day. I may be a romantic, but I get weird when it’s aimed at me 😂 

12- What element of writing do you struggle with most?

Editing. I refuse to do it. I hate it with the burning light of a thousand suns. Those of you that manage to edit your fics have all my admiration. I honestly don’t know how y’all do it. Doesn’t it just bore you to no end? 

13- Do you have any neglected work you really want to finish?

I have more drafts than I care to admit. I would like to complete a series I started long ago for Ethan x Merida, but I don’t know if I’ll ever do that. I’d settle for finishing one of my drafts 😅

14- If someone you know in real life (who isn’t involved in fandoms) asked to read your work, would you let them? If yes, what would you recommend they read first? 

Nope, haha, I’d not be able to do that. If I were that brave, I’d recommend this one maybe. I do so love Flynn. Or this one, mostly because I do so love the idea of Gabriel just pouting on the couch.

15 - Are there any writers (published authors and/or fanfic writers) who influenced your writing?

Not really. I mean all of em probably. I read a lot of books in a lot of genres. Mostly I use my drabbles as morning warm ups for my day job. 

There are definitely fanfic writers I admire around here that encourage me to share my silly things everyday. Especially all those queer writers out there that have a rather thankless existence sometimes around here but keep sharing their stories! They are all my heroes!!

16- Which one of your stories would you most like to see as a movie/series? 

Any and all of my Maiele and Tyril stories. I just love them sooooo much!!

17- Do you write original fiction? 

Yes, but until recently, I wrote mostly nonfiction.

I do have a fic I began a few years back when I was still teaching. I had a student who hated their writing class, so I promised to write a short story alongside them and read it to the class like all the students had to if they gave it an honest go. 

They did and so I did too, and I was asked the following year to do it again by more students and so I continued the same story. I’ve since continued that same fic, and maybe someday I’ll actually go looking to publish it. 

18 -  What other hobbies do you have?

I love the outdoors. Hiking, spelunking, kayaking, gardening, camping, anything and everything outdoors. My other favorite hobby, which I've done for years and years, is fencing. I still am part of a club and teach a few levels. 

19 - What’s your favorite emoji? 

😅 because it’s legit my state of existence at this point in life. 

20: BONUS - tell us anything you’d like (if you want to).

I want to send a special shout-out to all the absolutely lovely participants of August’s writer appreciation event I hosted. I still cannot believe y’all did this for me. 😘 These are each of my favorite fics you’ve written. Thank you for making our fandom a little brighter each and every day!

@aallotarenunelma Bathed in Sunlight @coffeeheartaddict2 Moths to a Flame @karahalloway A Leviathan Surprise @jerzwriter A Mother's Journal @ladylamrian Ma Cherie @mydemonsdrivealimo Run, Run @peonyblossom We're Gonna Get Married @petiteboheme Familia @storyofmychoices Passing Shower @tessa-liam All is Fair in Love and War @trappedinfanfiction What's In a Name? Lily's Top Three Commissions can be found here:

Crimes of Passion by @javsarts

A Year of Kisses by various artists: @lethendralis-paints @cashweasel @kundool @deheerkonijn @javsarts @weetlebeetle @kollapsar @mooreaux @rosefuckinggenius @/ArtbyAinna (IG) @littlestpersimmon @callmebeem

Trystan x Noel by @rosefuckinggenius

[luciluck2046-utdr]

Welcome to the (non) official

BLOG!!! (For short LUW)

This AU is my own idea. There may be some questions you may ask yourself, but first let me explain what this blog is for.

This post is the main one, I recommend checking it if you're new to this AU. Here I'll post everything Luci's Underwitch related. Or almost everything. I'll try. (I may have missed some art from my main acc, it is @artsycrow46)

Also, if you want to ask any character anything, on @lucisunderwitchasks you can ask them! Edit: The account was deleted and moved here(i have way too many accounts so I need to do some cleaning from time to time)

Let me give you a brief explanation of the AU. Luci's Underwitch is an AU where all monsters are actually humanized, being called Witches. Frisk is 12 during their travel around the Underground, doing the Pacifist Run, and in the end, accepting the job as the ambassador of Witches, but going 'home' to their dad. Chara fallows them pretty much everywhere, and likes Frisk very much, being besties.

Now several months fast forward, Frisk lives with the Dreemurr Family. Asriel (11 y/o) and Kris(5 y/o) are their siblings, and Toriel takes care of all of them, dating Sans (mhm, I'm one of them Soriel shipers).

Ten years later, Frisk and Asriel are at college, and Kris found out about the Dark Worlds!.. The year now it's 2025, and Kris with Susie are now at their homes, waiting for their siblings to come back from college for Easter! Scarlett is one of Frisk's best friends, maybe even more than friends! And Asriel is still single since he's autistic as fvck.

Toghether, Frisk (with Chara ofc), Kris, Asriel, Susie and Ralsei are going into a steampunk adventure in Frisk's closet.(all of this is happening after Chapter 2. I am going to play the next Chapters when they're out, and add them to another fanfic)

Under the cut you'll have more, and at the end there will be the questions.

'kay, the explanation wasn't that brief. I am going to make a comic about it, but I am still learning about how to draw perspective and hair sooooooo y'all won't get this soon.

I have two fanfics on the way with this AU, and a third one might appear after I finish the second.

The main fanfic is called Lost Souls, The First Part explaining different events from Frisk's life after they got out of the Underground, and The Second Part is going to fallow the two humans into the closet adventure! (The closet has nothing to do with lgbt, but the fanfic surely has a bunch of lgbt in it)

I might upload several chapters in a day, or forget about it for weeks. If anyone wants to read more and I haven't uploaded a new chapter in a long while, uhhhhh tell me? (My dumbass my forget fast)🫡🫡🫡

The link to it? I might add an AO3 link too after I figure out how to use that website-

The second fanfic is called Underground Adventures, fallowing Frisk trough the Underground. This one will be out all at once, not by parts, so it's no worth to put the link here.

Now the third fanfic. It's going to be called Runes And Adventures. It's going to be abt Kris in the dark world, during Chapter 1-2. The Chapters 3-4 are going to get a separate fanfic, since they're gonna be AFTER the steampunk adventure. I am not even working on how to write it or any ideas, since it's going to take a long time, and it's not the biggest deal. I might not write it at all, since you get to see most of Kris's interactions in the game already, but who knows?

NOW!!! The possible questions(since I can't say FAQ)

1. Why is it called Luci's Underwitch?

Well, it was supposed to be called Underwitch. But apparently that exists already so I had to add my name to it. TwT

2. How do the characters look?

Well, if you've been on my main, @luciluck2046, you would see a bunch of fanarts, but I'll post them here too a bit later.

3. Comic?

Not yet. I suck.

4. Inspiration?

I got inspired to make this AU after I finished TOH(The Owl House), and also I liked the idea of humans with magic that UnderMate has. So yeah, I kinda combined those two with Undertale and my creativity, and I got this AU!

Reference sheets

Welp, it seems you got to the end of the main post! I might update this often, but who knows? See you later my friend, and have fun reading!

[moonlit-escape]

⋆⛧°. ⋆ Sasha Mystreet headcanons !!

i have a tummy ache rn from eating too much. anyway here's sasha i lobe her

half russian, half korean

demisexual (this is me projecting not just bc of her color palette i promise dont LOOK at me like that)

still pretty closed off, cold, and stoic. but, once in a blue moon, gene and zenix get her to genuinely laugh or mouth off and get angry and they absolutely relish in it

they're best friends :(

the only one of the three who can currently legally drive.

breakcore / hyperpop-punk Queen !! (crystal castles, quinn, swrslvt/cynthoni, laura les, snafu, charli xcx, xn88ax. yknow, shit i added to her playlist)

PIERCINGS!! honestly w all these headcanons, if they are/were a punk, they have piercings. she has double eyebrow piercings, a bellybutton piercing, and a tongue piercing

got deeper into and still practices witchcraft, just not potions or spells. she prefers her palm-reading, tarot, herbal mixtures and remedies, and crystal charges

im planning on making her patron saint someone from MCD that didn't get to mystreet, but first i have to actually Watch MCD.

loves scented candles and incense. she has pretty incense holders all around the house

favourite video game is luigi's mansion

always plays luigi during mario party and always loses. but it's fine bc she always wins mario kart (zenix is always princess peach and gene always plays one of the fuckin monster goons: dry bones, shy guy, goomba, one of the koopa kids)

had a crush on gene at one point, and they even tried out a relationship in uni, but then realized they were just doing the same exact things they did as friends and weren't really going anywhere, so they stayed besties

uses potion bottles as water bottles because they're just more practical

runs a vampire fanfic tumblr blog. she makes really fuckin good vampire au fanfics of really popular fandoms

has a butterfly knife and switchblade collection. they're all really pretty

zenix made her match phone charms with him, but he tells everyone she forced him (nobody believes him)

her and gene used to be skater buddies (zenix couldnt figure out how to skate for the life of him), but she's the only one who still skates around sometimes

i don't know how to explain this to anyone and it is honestly just my own delusion but oh my God did sasha have a mini crush on katelyn in high school

like it wasn't anything super. but she cannot lie to herself and say she didn't have fun during gym getting to see katelyn

typical "goth gf" reads classic literature and edgar allen poe poems and short stories. but also she has to work, so she listens to audiobooks

it's not that she doesn't feel her emotions or anything, but more-so she's just not used to expressing them, and doesn't know how to properly. and now, she feels like it's too late and would be too awkward to learn how

so, she expresses herself in other ways. like through her loud music, or her witchcraft, or through pen sketches and painting

she likes to go on walks every once in a while in completely random or strange places. yknow, ones where it feels like you shouldn't really be going. and sometimes she sketches whatever she finds there and thinks about

whenever she has a particularly.. excruciatingly stressful day, she likes to lay on the floor with her astral projector light, listen to music, and take an edible. it helps her calm down, and feel like she's in a different world for a while

it has backfired before though, because her mind went to the wrong place, and she ended up having a panic attack. so, she makes sure she only does it when both of the guys are home to check on her and ground her if she does start spiraling

Don't do drugs, kids. And if you REALLY have to try it because you're stupid, don't do it Stupidly. have a babysitter. a Trusted babysitter. and don't start with edibles. Be safe, or fuck up and die