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littlemissmarvelous · 5 years ago

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Save Me

(This is part 2 to grand piano)

The beginning of Bucky and I was quick, passionate, and wild. People thought I was crazy for falling in love with the former winter soldier, and even more insane to be willing to marry him. Sam in particular always joked about how Bucky shouldn’t take that he has a dime like me for granted. I remember when he would laugh and his cheeks would get warm and red before he would kiss me softly. “I don’t think i could ever be stupid enough to lose the love of my life.”

Oh I wish his past self could see him now.

I thought i knew what heartbreak was. I thought it hurt, but that everyone exaggerated about it. That it would mend quickly…I couldn’t have been more wrong. You could see it from a distance; I was broken. It could be seen in the way I moved, the way I tried to get an impression from the overwhelming world around me. It could be noticed in the way I talked a bit softer every time somebody told me to speak up. I was broken, scattered in thousands of pieces, and nobody was there to pick me up again.

It’s been three days since and I haven’t left the solace of my bed. I know I need a shower, and a decent meal but my body is aching and my eyes haven’t really taken a break from crying. A loud knock sounds, making me groan at the fact that I indeed have to get out of bed. Trudging to the door, I peek through the peep hole to spot a very anxious looking redhead on my doorstep.

“Hey Nat.” I say after opening the door.

“Hey? Just hey after having not heard from you in days? Me and Steve have been really worried y/n, but we wanted to give you space.” I nod and quickly apologize. I didn’t intentiontially shut them out...it just works better for me to be on my own at the beginning. Her green eyes scanned my appearance and the state of my home before going to my face.

“Are you doing okay, y/n?”

The dam breaks.

I sob and whisper, “I can’t stop hurting, Nat. This hurts so much. I miss him but I don’t want to be near him. I love him but I also fucking hate him and I don’t know if I want him to hold me or stay the hell away from me because half the time my skin crawls now at the thought of his touch...knowing he placed those hands on someone else. He was giving his heart to someone else while I was stupid enough to believe I was the only one.” At the end of my spiel I was gasping for breath. Word vomit has a funny way of knocking the wind out of you sometimes. She frowns, eyes still trained on me. “I’m going to make you some tea okay? Go shower and maybe we can go somewhere, yeah?” I wipe my tears before replying, “yeah okay.” Turns out that shower was a godsend and much needed.

Nat ended up taking me to brunch that was filled with delicious mimosas. “You know what?” I ask.

“What?” She smiles.

“I want to go out tonight. Out out.”

Nat thinks for a moment before shrugging. “Yeah let’s do it. Get you back in the game, I’m sure Wanda and Sharon would be down to go too.” I grin before yelling, “Girls night!!!” And just like that the wound hurt a little bit less.

Later that night the four of us stood in Nat’s bedroom dressed to impress. She had placed me in a small red dress that had a high slit on the left and a deep v to emphasize my cleavage. With makeup done and heels on, we traveled to the kitchen for some pregame drinks while we ordered the Uber.

“You look absolutely smashing, y/n.” Sharon gushed to me, making me blush. Nat and Wanda quickly agreed with fast nods.

“She’s right y/n, you look like a frigging snack every man there will want to eat.” Wanda teased but winced after earning an elbow from Nat and Sharon.

My grip tightened around my glass, knuckles turning white. Other men. That was scary for me, the concept of other men. Bucky and I had just separated...I was nowhere near ready. A hand on my shoulder brought me out of my head and my eyes met Nat’s green ones.

“Hey, you don’t need to do anything you don’t want to. Just have fun okay. That’s what tonight’s about.” I smile gratefully at her and our moment was interrupted by the ding of Wanda’s phone.

“Uber’s here!”

5 shots.

3 mixed drinks.

And 3 Jell-O shots.

That’s how many I had when my legs decided to stop working and my vision was beginning to get fuzzy as I neared a blackout. Dragging myself to our table I fumbled for my phone and dialed the only number I could call.

“Hello?”

“STTTTTEEEVVVEEE!”

“Y/n? What’s wrong? Are you okay?” He asked with a concerned tone.

“Mmmphh. I am VERYyyy drunks Mr. Steve ! Wanna shleep.” A giggle erupts from me and suddenly it was hard to stop.

“I’m coming right now. Stay there. Tell Nat I’m coming. “

“Ayyye ayeee my cap!!” I laugh and hang up and look up to find Nat in my drunk daze. Luckily she was already coming my way and I yelled “Natty!!!! Stevie is comin to take me to bed! Okay!”

“Get it girl!” She laughed and with that I made my way to the entrance, holding the walls for support to keep myself up. Once just outside I found a spot against the wall and slipped my heels off my aching feet without falling over. Hugging myself, I pray that Steve hurries up because it was absolutely freezing.

“I can warm you up hottie.” My eyes quickly went up to see an ugly older man grinning at me with chipped teeth and a malicious look in his eyes.

“No thanks.” I quip and look away to the streets looking for Steve’s car.

“Looks like you’re ride ain’t gonna be here for a while hot stuff. I’m real good with my hands. Lemme just warm you up.” He smirked and pounced. His hands grabbed my wrists and pushed me against the wall hard causing me to yelp.

“Get OFF!” I scream. He just laughs in return and his hands go to my dress to lift it up. Tears flow freely from my eyes as I realize what’s really happening and my movements are too slow and my hits too weak because I’m drunk. I’m sobbing at this point and begging him to stop.

It was my second beg and just before he got to my panties that a fist flew to his face and he dropped to the floor in pain. “She SAID to stop!” He seethed.

Steve came just in time. As I stared at him, tears in my eyes, I realized he always was there in time. His eyes went to me and his hand cupped my face as he looked me over.

“Are you okay, y/n?” I nod and all I can let out is another sob. He pulls me in for a hug and holds me tight. “I’m sorry I wasn’t here quicker. Let’s get you home.”

The drive home was silent but he held my hand in comfort, and I didn’t pull away. When the car finally stopped at the tower Steve quickly turned off the car and ran around to open my door and help me out of the car, wobbly legs and all. Holding me heels in my left hand we slowly walk towards the entrance but before I could get there my legs finally betrayed me and I fell hard to the ground.

I groan. “Aw damn that hurt.” Trying to get back up seemed almost impossible, the alcohol had managed to turn me into a human sized noodle. “Stevieeeee can you help a girl out?” He laughed and I let out a shriek as he picked me up bridal style and walked with ease into the tower. My arms wrapped around his neck and my head found its way to the crook of his neck. “You’re such a sweetie Stevie why don’t you have a girl?” His shoulders shrugged and he hummed in thought.

“I dont think the one I want is ready yet. Or rather if it’s even right for me to act. It’s difficult.” His words made gears work in my drunk mind as the elevator took us up to our floor. Finally reaching my room, he sets me down at the door. “Alright this is it.”

“Steve?” My cheeks are flushed and my eyes are wide as I gaze up at him.

“Yeah y/n?” His eyes lock with mine and my heart begins to race.

“Is...is the girl you’re talking about...me?” My voice shakes in nervousness and my shoulders tense as I await his response. His hand goes to the back of his neck and his cheeks are suddenly pink. Lord he was so cute sometimes.

“Uh...yeah, yeah it is. I’m sorry.” I didn’t think, I didn’t speak, I didn’t even debate it.

My lips were on his before I could even really fathom his words, his hands finding my hips as his mouth moved with mine. After a long moment he slowly pulled away and looked me over.

“Look, y/n, you’re still pretty drunk. I don’t want you doing anything you’ll regret. You might not actually like me once the alcohol leaves your system.” His blue eyes are drowning in disappointment, a pang of hurt hitting my heart. “Look, get some sleep, I’ll see you in the morning and we can talk.” His words suddenly sobered me up enough that i had to do what i did next. He begins to walk away but I grab his hand before he could get farther away and halt his movements. I take a deep breath and whisper, “please don’t go.” His eyesbrows go up in question.

“I...would like you to stay. With me. In my bed.” I mumble. I had never seen Steve’s face so red before that very moment since he walked In on Sam and Wanda’s “workout” session. “I-I meant to just sleep. I would really appreciate your company. Clothing on and everything. I’m sorry if that makes you uncomfortable.”

He smiles warmly and takes my hand in his, intertwining our fingers. “I don’t mind at all, sweetheart. Lead the way.”

Changed and makeup free, I got under the covers and waited for him to join me. He stared at the covers unsure, causing me to giggle.

“Steve, get under the covers silly. It’s fine.” He chuckles and lifts the covers on his side so he could slide in next to me. Both of us lied on our backs after turning out the bedside lights, staring at the sleek ceiling above us. “Hey Steve?” I whisper.

“Yeah?” He whispers back.

“Can you hold me?” I ask timidly, not wanting him to think of it weird.

“Yeah,” He opens his arm for me to cuddle to his side, “Come here.” I sigh gratefully and cuddle up to his side as his arms wrap around him. My eyelids and body are growing heavy as the tiredness part of alcohol consumption started to hit me.

“Just to let you know Steve, everything that was said and done tonight...I wont forget or regret it. I like you too. I always have, Bucky just got here first.”

But thank you for saving me, I wanted to say.

Not even a few seconds later I was out like a light. Tomorrow morning was going to be interesting.

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