#stella replies to kind words

[stellar-solar-flare]

Suuuuuper random, but I spent the day re-reading your Christmas fic— The Great Christmas Debacle and it’s such a fix for whenever I’m craving a good “idiots in love” trope. A delicious angst with a HEA that just scratched all the dopamine centers in my brain LOL anyways just reminded me how your fics got me back into loving Steve fics again and wanted to just share my appreciation for your work— you’re so good. Along with Arrhythmia but that’s another adoration post to talk about later so good.

Loving how your blog is coming together too! Beyond gassin’ you up ✨, I was curious about how our Century!Steve and Reader are doing?? I miss this power couple!! 🗡️👑

Hope you’re having a great day, lad~

Oh my goodness, this message is so wonderfully kind! Thank you for taking the time to tell me all this - I'm always super excited to hear that someone is rereading an old fic of mine. I'm glad that The Great Christmas Debacle (AO3) hit the right spot!

And it's beyond flattering to hear that my fics have gotten you back into Steve fics! That's among the best compliments I've ever gotten, so thank you.

It's been wonderful to be here on tumblr, and people have been so kind and welcoming to me! Thank you again for the lovely message. If you ever feel like sharing, I look forward to hearing your thoughts on Mission-Induced Arrhythmia (AO3), too.

As for the next For Centuries (AO3), I have the next chapter in the works, and it's quite a major one at that. Under the cut is a small sneak peek from Chapter 18, so MAJOR SPOILERS for the fic For Centuries if you aren't caught up (haven't read the CH 17). I hope you enjoy! Very much unedited still.

(My overall spoiler tag is 'spoilers to ssf fics', in case you want to block that, but any sneak peeks that are spoilery will be under a cut.)

You broke the eye contact between you and Archduke Rogers, because looking into the endless, deep blue that seemed to be lit from within much like the stained glass in the high hall had been certainly wasn’t helping you gather your rattled thoughts. You deliberately let your gaze unfocus so that you could focus on everything that was running through your head, to make some sense of it. A low, metallic sound drifted into your consciousness — Archduke Rogers sheathing his sword, and you more sensed than saw him sharpen next to you. Where did you go, my duchess? he had asked you. Where had you gone? It was as if your soul was only barely contained by the edges of your being, something rattling the cage inside and ready to grow until it would burst at the seams. Your mind was scattering into a million different directions, but in the end, every half-formed, haphazard thought found one destination. Soulmates. The word drummed in your head, echoing something you could not describe. You weren’t certain that even after the conversation you had had with him today, you were ready to call the Smith sentimental, but something about all this made you ask more questions you didn’t have an answer to. Slowly, you turned towards the bowl for the ritual, still resting on the small table. The very last embers were shining in the kindling underneath, and of course, you had heard of certain mages inhaling all kinds of smoke to gain insight from the gods, and yet, it seemed like too obvious an explanation to what you and Archduke Rogers had experienced in that other realm. The presence of the gods, the power of the goddess of fire flowing through you. If stars were fire, fire that made the world, fire into which all would once return to be made anew… Then what was the true nature of its goddess, and how could the love of someone so powerful to be so doomed, if the story of the northern king was true? “Those that love are the fiercest of them all,” you whispered. “What are the contents of a heart filled with love if not fire? What is this burning that consumes me if not a pyre; and it shall warm the forge in which I shall sharpen my sword.” “That is beautiful,” Archduke Rogers murmured, and only when he did, you realized you had spoken out loud. “Is it a prayer?” “It is from a play,” you replied, feeling the heat on your cheeks. “From a monologue of Prince Wulfric, who claims he shall slay the whole world if it tries to separate him from the woman he loves.” “A man after my own heart,” Archduke Rogers said, his mouth curling up into an one-sided smirk, and your heart lost its steady rhythm as you realized what he was alluding to.

[meowshark12]

i know it won't work (rc)(3)

series summary: you're best friends with topper, kelce, and rafe. it has never bothered you to see them with other girls, knowing that they usually only have flings, but, when rafe gets what appears to be a girlfriend, how does this change things?

(not canon)rafe x kook!reader, original characters

chapter 3 summary: the after effects of Topper's party. I'll leave it at that.

warnings: rafe is pissing me off.

2.4k words, basically unedited.

1 2 3

chapter 3: why

...

Topper's party ends with you, Stella, and Macey walking back over to your house after the vast majority of the crowd had dissipated. All who remained there ended up crashing somewhere in the great unknown of Topper's parent's estate.

You wake up in your bed next to a snoring Macey and an already awake Stella, who greets you with a soft smile and your water bottle. You sit up.

"Thanks," you whisper, careful to not wake Macey. You take a few sips of your water, not realizing how thirsty you actually were. "what time is it?" you ask.

"only 8" Stella responds, which prompts you to lay back down (dramatically) and open your phone.

You are met with 11 messages from Topper from last night.

...

top

yoooooo wya??

sent 1:28am

yn. are you here

sent 1:31am

did you fr go home?

sent 1:32am

omfg I see ur light on.

sent 1:32am

you actual pos

sent 1:32am

kelce and rafe are asking where you guys went

sent 1:36am

they say they're coming over

sent 1:37am

I told them not to. why did you leave?

sent 1:41am

what's wrong.

sent 1:45am

pls respond.

sent 1:46am

ok gn then. dont be mad.

sent 2:19am

...

You sigh. Stella shoots a questioning look your way before you show her your phone and she understands.

Macey stirs, though it is much too early yet for her to arise. She hums in her sleep, probably to tell you guys to be quiet.

"what do I even say to all this?" you ask, nobody answers, but you didn't really need an answer. You knew that you would explain to Topper that you and the girls just needed a girls night, but you also knew that he wouldn't buy it for a second.

You respond to Topper, and ask if he would want to meet you at the club for lunch, somewhat disregarding his messages but knowing he would force you into talking about last night somehow. Topper may not be the brightest, but he is much more in tune with emotions than someone might think. He says yes to lunch, and you turn your phone off, satisfied with the way you bought yourself a few more hours.

You think about the best way to approach the subject with Topper. Because 'hey me and the girls don't like that beautiful girl that you and the boys hangout with and we want you all to ourselves because it works better that way' doesn't seem like the right thing to say. Topper texts you again, asking if you could do coffee and bagels instead. You take a minute to respond though you know you'll say yes anyway. You were hungry and did need a hangover-curing coffee, as did your girls, you were sure.

You reply a nonchalant 'sure' to Topper before telling Stella your plans and that you'll bring her and Macey back their faves. Topper offered to drive, so you begin your walk to his house.

As you open the fence and walk through, you see Rafe's truck pulling out of the driveway with Amber in the passenger seat. You have to stifle a reaction, but you did not expect to see Rafe and Amber interact ever again. Rafe was usually a one-night kind of guy, not a one-night and drive you home the morning after kind of guy.

You had heard your fair share of Rafe's escapades in your group's conversations, but nobody in the group ever seemed phased to hear about anyone else's hookup stories.

Though, there was the one time that you shared a story that the boys, and especially Rafe, were not fond of.

You had just turned 17, and had all begun the night drinking your beverages of choice and hanging out in Kelce's room, if you could even call it that. Kelce's parents only had one kid, and they let him have free reign of their finished basement. So, as you all sprawled on the various couches and chairs there was conversation flowing aimlessly throughout the group.

Though, you started out talking to the girls (who prompted you) about your recent endeavors with a boy named John, the boys begun listening after they realized the topic of conversation. You were never entirely open with the boys about your personal life, so they were completely intrigued with the conversation.

You paused partway through your long story before realizing that the three nosy boys on the other side of the room had stopped their conversation to listen to you. You laughed, saying a quick "stop listening!" before rolling your eyes and turning back to the girls. When you saw that the boys had no intention of stopping their listening, you turned back to them and didn't speak.

"Oh come on, yn, we never get to hear about this stuff!" Kelce begins, raising his eyebrows and giving you a look to try to persuade you to continue.

"Yeah, yn, you know all about our lives, how come we rarely get to know about yours?" Topper chimes in, agreeing with Kelce's sentiment. Rafe is quiet, not sure if he wants to hear what you are going to say, but his gaze on you is intent, almost silently willing you to continue talking.

"Ugh. Okay. Well..." you begin, without really knowing how to continue. All you had really told the girls was that you had hooked up with John Townsend, the boy whose parents were the sole contributors of the Kildare Yacht Club. But, the boys hadn't been listening to who, all they heard was that you had hooked up with someone.

"Go on..." Macey says, hoping her prompting will elicit a reaction out of you.

"We've just hooked up a few times. It's not that big of a deal." You spit out finally, waiting to see what your friends will say.

"A few times?!?" Stella nearly yells. "I thought it was only the one time at his house?" She finishes, waiting for you to say something. Before you can, Macey interrupts.

"His house?!? I thought it was only at the..." she starts before glancing at the boys, "...you know where I thought it was." she finished meekly. The boys erupt in a series of "what"s and "no way"s, turning to you for an explanation.

You laugh and cover your face with your hands, your cheeks turning a shade of red that you didn't even know existed before now. The boys are all slack jawed and waiting for you to talk.

"Oh what? Like you all haven't had your fair share of hookups??" You start, "why is this so crazy?"

"because its YOU, yn. You've never told us about this stuff before, even when we ask!" Topper says, still bewildered. You look between the boys. Rafe seemingly deep in thought, Kelce wide eyed, and Topper's mouth still hanging open.

You begin to defend yourself before you are cut off by Rafe asking "Who is this guy?" and that's when you realize that they hadn't been listening the whole time. Topper and Kelce hum to show that they also want to know. You look over at Stella and Macey, both of whom are making faces at you to show that maybe you shouldn't tell the boys who this mystery man is that you've hooked up with more than one time.

"Ummmmmmm..." you start, not intending to share with them.

"Fine. If you don't want to share, we'll just got through your phone and find out ourselves." Topper says, lunging toward your phone with an open hand.

You protest, holding it out of reach. Some semblance of a fight ensues, the girls trying to keep them away and the boys pushing through (to the best of their ability without trampling a bunch of 17 year old girls) to get to your phone.

"FINE!" you finally shout, stopping the fight. "If you really want to know that bad... it was John Townsend." You finish.

Rafe is the first to speak. "What?" He says plainly.

"Did you really not hear me?" you say.

"no, I think I heard you. I just- what??" he finally answers.

You look at the rest of the group, the girls looking relieved but worried, and the other boys looking somewhat the same as Rafe.

"What's the problem with John?" you ask innocently.

"What's the problem? Yn what's NOT the problem?" Kelce begins before Topper finishes his sentence.

"Yeah, yn, that guy is bad news. His parents might be hot shit in Kildare, but he's a weirdo. Especially for younger girls, like you." Topper says, not intending to hurt you with his words, but they do sting a little.

Rafe is still silent, and you look to him to say something. He avoids your gaze, waiting for the other boys to be done.

"I think they just mean that you should be careful, yn" Stella begins, trying to fix the tension in the room.

"No, Stel, we mean that she shouldn't be so stupid to fuck around with a dirty loser like that guy." Rafe finally speaks up, and his words hurt you the most. "I mean really, yn. Be serious right now."

You're on the verge of tears, not expecting to be belittled in front of your only friends.

"Alright that's enough dumbass." Macey says. "She's allowed to do whatever she wants and doesn't need approval from anyone, especially not you idiots."

You give her a small smile. You're not sure why Rafe's words affected you that much. You all are silent for a moment before conversation restarts. You excuse yourself to go to the bathroom, hoping to get your bearings back.

Stella and Macey follow not long after you, and soon you are all on the bathroom floor. They begin explaining to you that the boys were just being stupid and protective like they always were, and that it just got out of hand. You agreed, and soon everything was back to normal. But, you had always thought about that moment before beginning to share something with your friends from that moment on.

Overall, the relationships of your friends were private from your friend group. In a way, all of your most important relationships were with each other. So why would you want that to change? Nobody ever really had serious relationships anyway, and you all liked it that way. At least you thought you all liked it that way.

Soon after you see Rafe and Amber leave, Topper comes out of the house and sees you leaning against the passenger door of his Jeep.

He gives you a small smile before unlocking his car. You open the passenger door and get in.

Topper climbs into the driver's seat right after you. "Coffee first or bagels?" he asks, avoiding the obvious awkwardness between the two of you.

"Bagels, probably? I'm gonna get coffee for the girls too, don't want it to melt," you reply easily, since conversation with Topper has always come naturally for you. Topper nods, turning up the music that was playing and rolling down the windows.

The drive to get bagels was short, short enough that neither of the two of you had tried to initiate conversation, but long enough that the awkwardness began to brew. After getting bagels, you buckled yourself in and felt the rumble of the engine, but Topper didn't shift the car to begin driving.

You knew that leaving early normally wouldn't have been a big deal for other people. Especially since you lived right next door, it makes sense to sleep in your own bed after a party instead of cramming into one person's house. But, the six of you always stayed, and if you didn't, you wouldn't leave without saying goodbye.

"So," Topper begins, "what's up with you?" he says, not necessarily intending to blame you for leaving early, but maybe he knew it was your idea to leave.

"What do you mean?" you challenge, hoping he will give you some information before you explain yourself.

"I don't know, it's just weird that you guys left yesterday," he says, pausing to take in your reaction. You nod with him, understanding why he would be upset about it. "Why did you leave without telling us? I mean, we know you live right there, but that's just never happened before. We were kinda worried... Rafe suggested showing up to your house and then Kelce wanted to go with him, but I figured we should just leave you guys be." At the mention of Rafe, your ears perk up. Why had he of all people suggested going over? Wasn't he preoccupied with Amber?

"Yeah, I know we should've told you we left," you say honestly, feeling bad that you left him high and dry. "Honestly," you begin, and Topper is now staring at you, "we were just not exactly feeling it, it was kind of a weird vibe outside with you guys... and Amber... and I don't know, we just figured we would go back to mine kinda early," you pause, seeing Topper's gaze soften. "I'm really sorry though, Top. You know I didn't mean to leave you like that. We aren't mad at you, the vibe was just off and we felt weird still being there." you finish.

"Okay... well if that's really it, and you're not mad, then we are all good. We just don't want to mess around with a mad yn, or a mad Macey, for that matter." You laugh, glad to have been able to dance around the point enough to satisfy Topper's craving for an answer from you.

The two of you finish your coffee run and come back to your house to a wide awake Stella and Macey awaiting your arrival.

"Finally!" Macey says dramatically, as if she hadn't woken up ten minutes prior.

"I think she means 'thank you'" Stella explains while helping you with their drinks.

"You're welcome," you respond, and Topper trails in behind you. After the two of you made up, you figured you might as well invite him in for breakfast.

After the four of you eat together, a notification from your group chat lights up your phone.

...

rafe

ward not home. druthers today at 12?

...

Kelce has already responded 'yes' and the four of you are in agreement as well. Today was going to be a day on the boat. You were hopeful that this would be able to mend the crack slowly forming in the group of the six of you.

But, your hopes were soon crushed when you arrived to the Druthers and see Rafe and Amber awaiting your arrival.

You look at the girls, and they're already looking at you. You sigh, shrug, and hope that you all can make the best out of the day ahead of you.

🏷️list: @flvredcas @rafesno1bae @kiiyomei @silkylovey @girlwedontcare @sunny1616 @asterizee @pillowprincess4him @patychieffi @rafeslittleangel @anightlikethisss @drewsdirtyslut @mattyskies @theyluvmesblog @gothamgirl2024 @ujws5 @kmhbygss @kaiparkerwifes

a/n: hope you all keep enjoying! sorry for huge delay in posting. ill be back hopefully for a while!

[itsmarsss]

Scandalous (Blitzø x Fem!Succubus!Reader x Stolas) [Helluva Boss] pt. 5 - Monster

How the mighty do fall. (Getting into a weird three-way situation with an imp and a succubus isn't exactly considered classy, Stolas)

If they’re only with him as prisoners, what kind of monster does that make him? 

pt. 1 | pt. 2 | pt. 3 | pt. 4 | 1st bonus | pt. 6 | pt. 7 | pt. 8 | pt. 9

Warnings: mentions of sex as usual, some depressing thoughts, slight mention of an abusive relationship (stella), you guys ready for a time jump? this happens after the season 1 finale. don't worry we'll find out what happens during that in a later chapter! a lot of the dialogue here comes straight from the show. this is all solely in stolas' pov!!

Word count: 6,005

Stolas almost wishes he’d have the guts to kick the two demons out after they were done with the… activities agreed upon.  

He almost wishes they’d see themselves out immediately after, not leaving him a single, mere second to get used to their presence. He almost wishes their talk of not staying the night weren’t so empty, the promise broken by a simple plea for them to stay. He almost wishes he’d have the willpower to refrain himself from pleading. He almost wishes they had never let him have a taste of feeling their weight on his mattress next to his own body or to their body heat keeping him warm under his fancy bedsheets, to begin with. He almost wishes they’d never let him have an insight into how a life as their lover could be like, waking up to their half-dressed bodies still lazily holding onto his in some way in the morning. 

Then again, Stolas is a hypocrite. A self-aware one at that, too. 

Because he could intervene and he could stop all of these things from happening. He could tell them they had to go. He could not ask them to stay. He could never see them again. Because he’d been the one to propose they start this complicated situation they all found themselves in and he was the only one, really, who could realistically put an end to it, given they still needed their part of the deal. Because he could have done it a long while ago, cut the problem at its roots, stopped himself from falling, never have pushed them into this, and he’s well aware of it. He never really did, though. 

He should have. 

As the months went by, the more Stolas’ feelings- real, scary, romantic feelings- grew. And, with it, the more he started to see their arrangement in a different light. Back when he didn’t care all that much, he didn’t really think it through. They wanted something of his, he wanted something from them. It seemed fair and simple in his mind at the time. 

But he cares now. And at times it makes him feel disgusting. What was he thinking, anyway, tying them to himself against their will? Sure, they agreed when they could have denied it. But then again, he held the power in all of this. He had the book and they needed it badly. They’d probably do whatever he wanted for it. 

The thought had started to make him sick.

If they’re only with him as prisoners, what kind of monster does that make him? 

He buries those thoughts and conceals those feelings whenever he sees the two, making place for the momentary happiness that comes with their visits, but it eats him alive. 

He hadn’t seen either of them in a while, ever since… what happened at Ozzie's. He’d texted both Blitzo and y/n the day after that, and, upon receiving a disappointing one-letter text in reply from the imp and a nicer, but still dry and impersonal one from the succubus, he didn’t know why he still expected more than that. 

Then again, he’d never really looked at the situation through a lens other than his own. Why should he expect anything? It wasn’t their fault that he cared about them beyond the sexual nature of their relationship when their agreement ended at that. 

The whole divorce ordeal was coming close to making him lose his mind. When he announced he wanted a divorce, he thought that would be enough. He’d even felt bad about how he did all of that in front of Stella’s friends, how he embarrassed her.

But the aftermath of it reminded him of how that’s all she used to do to him, over and over again, and now she wasn’t accepting the idea all that well, seen as she still stayed around the palace, as if nothing had changed. 

It annoyed him to no end. 

“I cannot do this anymore, I want you out. Now.”

“What do you mean… ‘out’?”

“I mean out! Out of this palace. Out of my life. We are getting the divorce.”

“How dare you? What do you think the rest of the Goetia family will think? And Andrealphus-” Stella raised her hand, surely to slap him the face. It wasn’t something she did often, but Stolas couldn’t say it had never happened before. He’d allowed it, then, deeming himself deserving of it. 

He wouldn’t allow it this time. Never again. 

Stopping her made him realize how easily he could have done it all those other times, had he had the courage to. Announcing the divorce had unknowingly been the first step he needed to find the guts to begin standing up for himself. It was scary, but it was thrilling, at the same time. “I don’t care what your arrogant brother thinks!And the only thing the Goetia family wanted from our marriage is already seventeen, so it’s over. I’m done.”

Stolas knew what he did, and he knew Stella wouldn’t forgive him for it. He could only ever hope Via could, someday, understand. Still, he supposed what was in his power now that he had done it was to not let things fall into what they were before. He couldn’t have gotten things so messy for nothing. 

He didn’t even know what to think of the fact that he just couldn’t feel bad for what he’d done. Things were falling apart, and as much as he wished all of this didn’t affect Via, he didn’t regret it, now that it was done. In fact, he was relieved. Because he couldn’t go back now.

And he was fine with not wanting to.

So no more pretending to be fine, no more putting everyone else’s wishes before his own.  

… It’s easier said than done when that’s all you’ve ever known. 

[. . .]

Stolas woke up with a headache. Fuck, it was moving day. 

Well, for Stella, that is. And she wasn’t moving, per se. She had moved out the same night he demanded that she did, but every single day after that she’d come over to the palace again, claiming to have forgotten something she so desperately needed. 

The night before, he’d had enough of it, making sure to pull whatever strings he could to have all of her things out of his home by the end of the next day. 

So he woke up early, with a pounding headache, put on his robes, and walked himself straight to the front door, not stopping to get himself breakfast as he usually did. He could already hear some commotion. Good, at least people were already there to start on getting her absurd amount of belongings. Maybe they’d be done early enough that he could enjoy the rest of the day. Honestly, all Stolas had been longing for was a peaceful day. 

It was quickly proven to him that this wasn’t going to be one of those. 

As soon as he laid his foot on the first floor, the phone started ringing, and a servant ran over to bring it to him. He let out a sigh. Stella, surely. 

He was right. 

[. . .]

The phone call was going on half an hour with no signs of ending any time soon, when Via walked in.

It was hard to properly talk to her when Stella was whining on the other side of the call, so he deemed it better to dismiss her and have a conversation when he and her mother were done yelling at each other. “Darling, can we not talk about this now? Your mother is being a real B-I-T-C-H.”

Stella yelled incoherent insults at him for that. “Well how was I supposed to know you can spell? I’ve never seen you read!”

About an hour later, only a couple minutes after finally being able to hang up the phone, it rang again. He let out a groan in annoyance. Did she ever, ever shut up? 

He picked the phone up again, ready to curse at her when a voice came through first- one that wasn’t hers.

“Heyyy, Stolas, so, your daughter came by, took your book and teleported off to who-the-fuck-knows-where and we have no way of getting either of them back. Okay? Okay, good talk. Byyee!” Blitzø blurted it all out at once before hanging up abruptly. 

What. The actual. Fuck. 

In an instant, Stolas was there, in his full demon form without having even noticed he’d changed into it, angry beyond he’s ever been at the imp. 

“BLITZ!”

“Heeeyy, Stolas,” Blitzo tried (and failed miserably) to act nonchalant, earning angry looks from his employees.

Stolas turned back into his normal self, now worried more than anything, pacing back and forth on the reception floor as he tried to assimilate the situation. “How could this happen? Do you just let anyone waltz into your office and grab infinitely powerful artifacts?” He shouted. “Why would she do this? How are we supposed to find her? Where would she go?”

Blitzo’s daughter, Loona, tried sniffing around. Was it even possible that she’d be able to smell that? Apparently, she was successful, as she announced… “Well, it reeks of urine and desperation, so-”

“L.A.?” y/n asked, interrupting her. She seemed to be hoping she was wrong.

Loona confirmed with a nod. ‘L.A.”

Stolas didn’t understand exactly how she’d managed to do that, or even why y/n knew immediately where she was talking about just from those disgusting things she’d said about the place- that place must be awful. The thought only got him more worried, come to think of it. How was Via going to deal with a place that seemed to be so terrible in a realm she’d never visited? 

Stolas tilted his head to the side. “What is this ‘L.A.’ place like?”

“It’s not that different from here. She’ll be fine, I’m sure,” y/n tried to reassure him. It didn’t work all that much. 

He grimaced in preoccupation as he conjured a portal.

Blitzø was the last to walk through it. “Alright, Loona, let’s make this quick. In and out before anyone notices we’re here.” He looked around, taking the view in. “Oh, this doesn’t look much different from Hell.”

“I told ya,” y/n tells him. 

“Alright, well, let’s get to work. Loony, sniff!”

“How am I supposed to smell anything in this city?”

“Can’t you even do one thing right?” Moxxie complained, annoyed.

“Can't you finally do something about how fat you are?” The hellhound retorted.

“I’m not!”

Blitzø joined the conversation. “You know, it wouldn't kill ya to put a salad in your body every now and then.”

“What? But I'm not fat! I’m not!”

Great. He had no idea where Via was and the people supposed to help him find her were arguing about… whatever that was.

Blitzø climbed on top of a dumpster, grabbing a megaphone from satan-knows-where and talking into it. “Now! First things first, if we’re gonna do this the old-fashioned way, we’re gonna need disguises.”

Okay, now that Stolas could do. In an instant, he morphed into his human form, as did Loona and y/n, making Millie clap, amused at their abilities. He still couldn’t fathom the fact that the other three imps didn’t have real human disguises, and apparently just walked around the human realm as they were. 

Stolas could almost swear Blitzø looked amused as well, but it only lasted a second. Maybe he’d imagined it. He didn’t dwell on it- there was no time for anything other than finding his baby. 

“No chance you could conjure us a couple of those… can ya?” Blitzø asked him.

“Sadly, no. I’m afraid without my Grimoire my powers are just a tad limited in the human world,” Stolas explained. 

Blitzø scoffed. “What, you can’t memorize your fucking spells?”

“Oh, your memory’s so great? What’s his phone number?” Stolas motioned at Moxxie.

“Fuck you.”

Stolas smiled, content that he’d gotten his point across. “Eeeeexactly.”

As they all walk out of the alley they were in, Stolas grabs himself a pair of red-tinted sunglasses that he puts on his head, where his second pair of eyes would be. Yeah, that feels better. He watches as y/n grabs a pair too- purple heart-shaped ones- and pays for both. Where she’d gotten human money he didn’t know, but he found it endearing that she would spend it on their glasses when she could have just walked out with them. 

They continue on their way- which Stolas admittedly didn't know exactly to where, when y/n stops walking, asking them to wait. She’s turned around now, talking to Millie while Moxxie talked to a funny-looking human man. 

“What’s he doing?”

Moxxie hisses at Millie as she tries to take whatever it was he was holding from him. She sighs. “Look we’ll find ya, alright? I’ll just stick around so he doesn't do anything stupid.” 

“You sure?”

“Yeah, we can handle ourselves. Right?”

“Right.” Y/n turns back around, cueing for everyone to keep walking.

“You worry too much,” Blitzø remarks.

“Oh shut the fuck up. Let’s find you something to wear.”

“What’s wrong with what I’m wearing?”

Stolas shared a look with her. “Blitz, you’re not exactly… passing as a human right now.”

“And whose fault is that?” He jabs at Stolas. 

Y/n rolls her eyes at the comment, grabbing both demons by the hand and dragging them around until they found a shop she deemed useful. 

She grabbed some cash and gave it to Blitzø , sending him on his way inside the store, opting to wait outside. Stolas decided it would be best if he did the same. He tapped his foot nervously on the sidewalk as they waited and tilted his head to the side when Blitzø walked out the door with human clothes and gigantic costume ears to conceal his horns. Perhaps not changing would’ve brought less attention to him. 

“Now that’s disturbing,” Stolas pointed out. 

Blitzo looked like he was about to say something in return, but wasn’t able to- someone started yelling beside them. “Ahh! Look everyone! It’s Hollywood star, Brannon Ragers!”

“What?” Y/n asked no one in particular. 

“The fuck is a Brandon Rager- ohh,” Blitzø looked up behind himself, and the two demons did the same. Ohh, indeed. There it was, a billboard, huge as can be, with a guy’s- well, apparently Brannon Ragers’ face on it. The similarity between that guy and whatever was going on with Blitzo’s appearance right now was uncanny.

Stolas’ eyes widened. “Oh, dear.” If they didn’t want attention then, now things were getting so, so much worse.

A hoard of fans quickly surrounded Blitzø, to the point of almost suffocating him, as they asked for selfies or autographs or simply smothered him to the ground trying to hug him. “Millie! Where the fuck are you and your whorebag husband?” Stolas could hear him scream, but couldn’t for the life of him see him in the middle of so many people.

“Can you do something about this?” He asked y/n, unsure if either of them should even do anything. 

“I mean, technically I could wipe ‘em out but I don't think we want that, do we?”

No, definitely not. 

As the three of them tried to push their way into the crowd to get to Blitzø, someone blew a whistle, which made Loona’s ears hurt and caused everyone else to pay attention to whoever had done it- apparently, some guy with ugly glasses brandishing a diploma from ‘cinephile university’, whatever that meant. 

Satan, this place was so much more chaotic than Hell was.

It worked, though- the crowd dispersed, and Blitzø was released from someone’s grip, getting dropped face-first onto the sidewalk. Some other guy made his way over to him. “Mr. Ragers, we’ve been looking for you everywhere! You were supposed to be on set an hour ago!” As he spoke, two other guys, assumedly bodyguards, grabbed Blitzø up from the ground, holding him by his arms. 

“The fuck are you talking about?” Blitzø questioned.

“Shit, they think he’s that weirdo from the billboard,” Stolas heard y/n tell Loona.

“Your guest spot on ‘Sweetie, I’m in The House”! We’re taping tonight. Now, hurry up and get in the car.”

“Oh, no, no, no, no, no, I’m not going anywhere with you, jizz biscuit,” Blitzø flipped him off. 

The guy didn’t seem bothered at all. “Very funny, Mr. Ragers. Now get in the car-” was he- was he making cat noises at him? “Come on, boy, come on,” he kept on, apparently trying to bribe him with fruit snacks, which only made everything so much more confusing. Was this Brannon Ragers guy flat-out stupid?

“Get your fucking hands off me!” Blitzø tried to release himself from the two bodyguards’ grip, but was unsuccessful, only making things worse for himself. “Loona, Stolas, y/n, a little help here?” He called out, now being forcefully dragged. His fake ears came off, but it didn't even faze anyone there. Humans are weird.

“Oh, shit,” y/n muttered. Apparently, like Stolas, she’d imagined Blitzø would have been able to get himself out of that situation, but things were going out of control now.

Stolas had to think, and fast. The crowd was going wild again, so he used his height as an advantage, the only one out of the three who could actually see over people. “Excuse me, sir, uhhhh” Shit, if they left Blitzø alone, who knew where they would take him? “I’m…. Mr. Ragers’ agent!” He found himself exclaiming. “I don’t believe you can just-” Yet another bodyguard simply grabbed him off the floor, taking him with them with no effort. That got him distracted for a second. “Oh, you are strong!” 

“No! What the fuck are you doing?” Y/n yelled after him, which was fair. He hadn’t really put much thought into what he’d done. No use thinking about it now that he and Blitzø were getting aggressively thown into the back of a van.

It only took a couple seconds for Stolas to realize what that meant- how was he going to look for Octavia from there?

“Blitz, we don’t have time for this. Via could be anywhere… She could be in danger.”

For a second, Blitzø looked worried too, until it seemed he’d had an idea. “Don’t worry, I’m on it.” He punched the window so he could stick his head out of it, looking for Loona and y/n. “You two! Go find Via! We’ll catch up soon!”

He was met with a middle finger from both of them. 

“Yeah! Way to be a team!” He yelled out, getting himself back into the van. “She’s in great hands.”

Stolas let himself smile weakly. He didn’t know if that was true, but he wanted to believe it- after all, Loona had been able to track Via up here, and y/n was sure to do the best she could. 

[. . .]

As they got to what apparently was their destination- Starstruck Studios, as it read- Blitzø was dragged around the set, barely able to keep up to what they were doing to him. They styled his fake hair, poked his eyes with something, applied heavy makeup on him- which, for some reason, did nothing to conceal his obvious red skin, and gave him a pat on the back, telling him he was ready and would be on in five. At some point during all of that, Stolas was handed what could be anywhere between 10 and 600 water bottles. 

“What? Five what? I can’t be in a sitcom.”

“Should’ve had an ego crisis before signing the contract,” the producer guy mocked him. 

Stolas took a good look at him. He looked nervous. He killed people for a living, was on the brink of getting killed every single day, and this was making him nervous. 

“I- I- I- I- I don’t even know the fucking lines, idiot!”

“Well, that’s why god invented teleprompters.” 

Stolas hardly believed teleprompter could ever be described as a creation of god’s, but sure. Blitzø looked like he was on the verge of collapsing. Stolas tried to help out. “Shouldn't he rehearse or something?”

“No can do, we’re live in 10… 9…-” They guy started counting out, and with each second that passed Blitzø seemed to spiral even more.

“Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit, I- I- I can’t do this! No, not again.” He began pacing back and forth around the room. “I- I haven’t performed since-”

Alright, time to be the level-headed one. 

Stolas walked towards him. “Blitz, if your performance on stage is half as good as it is in bed, you’ll leave them… breathless,” he cooed, satisfied at the gulp he could see the imp take when he whispered the last word, free hand running over his throat. 

But no more time for that. He pushed Blitzø towards the stage. “Now hurry up and wow them so we can get back to finding Via!” Blitzø stopped at the door in front of him, and Stolas opened it, pushing him again, this time right onto the stage. “Break a leg, darling!” 

Suddenly, the lights were on. The crowd wasn’t huge, but there was a considerable amount of people there to watch the live recording. The actor who was already sitting on the couch delivered the first line. “Well if it isn’t our neighbor, Ronney! You feel that earthquake earlier?”

Blitzø looked terrified. Oh, no. “Say something,” Stolas urged him in a whisper from behind the camera.

Someone thankfully got him the teleprompter. He looked like he was barely present as he read his line from the screen. “Oh, yeah. Yeah! That was just… my wife… rolling out of bed.”

Stolas looked at the audience, worried no one would laugh at the joke. If no one laughed at his joke Blitzø might as well collapse. He was relieved when they started laughing. Blitzø, in turn, was beyond relieved- his eyes were almost sparkling with joy. He’d made people laugh!

Granted, they might have only done so because of the big signs telling them to, but Blitzø didn’t need to know that. Whatever was going on, it seemed to put him in a much better place, as he no longer looked like he was halfway through spiraling. It granted him the courage to keep on and even improvise. 

“Yeah! Yeah, and then that bitch hit her head on the way down and shattered her skull!”

Stolas didn’t even register the crowd’s reaction this time. He’d forgotten Blitzø is a performer. He couldn’t contain a laugh. 

Blitzø went on. “There was blood everywhere. Peed her pants,” Stolas was full on giggling now, though it took him a second to realize people had only now started laughing along. How did they not find this funny? No matter. 

Why did Blitzø even kill people anyway when this is what he’s supposed to do? He’s funny and- and… Blitzø winked at him, and immediately Stolas could feel his cheeks burn, downing some of the many water bottles he was holding to cool himself down. 

Where was he? Oh, right. He was funny and interesting and charming. Why had he given up performing? Perhaps Stolas could ask him about it at a later time.

The material of the show certainly wasn’t helping much. After a while, things were getting repetitive and, frankly, boring. And Stolas could see he was definitely not the only one who thought so, as the guy on his right had left the place altogether and the one on his left had literally fallen asleep.

Was this shoot ever going to end?

Blitzø’s character was rambling to the ugly tiny dog they’d brought in about it being the fifth couch he’d ruined that year.  “You know, maybe it's time I find you a new home, one that can put up with your attitude.”

A little girl walked into the set for the first time since the scene had started. “I can take him, Mr. Ronney! I’d be happy to adopt old Ugie and give him all the attention he needs!”

The crowd let out an ‘aw’ at the scene, everyone a little more interested now. Okay, good, it sounded like the episode was coming to an end, finally.

Blitzø held on to the dog’s collar, kneeling on the floor in front of it. “Yeah… yeah, maybe you should adopt.”

Oh, no, what was going on? Blitzø looked lost in thought, an unreadable look taking over his features. It didn’t look like a good sign at all. 

 “No. No, no, no, you can’t have her!” Her? “She’s mine and I love her!” Now that didn’t seem like acting. His expression was that of worry. 

He was right back to spiraling. 

“But Mr. Ronney, you gotta let me have the puppy. You’ve just gotta!” The kid tried salvaging the scene. 

Blitzø full-on hissed at her, shoving her away. “Don’t you touch her, you little anal fissure!”

Yep, he was definitely not doing well, whatever it was that suddenly caused this. Stolas found himself stuck, debating whether he should go there and do something.

The crowd laughed at what Blitzø said, which had been good before, but it was terrible timing now. “Oh, you think this is funny, assholes? She’s not fit to be a mother! I saw her doing lines of coke in her dressing room!”

“Hey, maybe-” Stolas tried talking to the cameraman, but was interrupted by the commotion of the bodyguards from earlier trying to get to Blitzø and contain him. 

Bad idea for them, but they didn’t know that yet. 

Another actress tried, once again, to salvage the scene, which was bonkers. What was there to even salvage after this? “Now, uh, Ronney, I think maybe you should-” she tried taking the dog from him, which was clearly the wrong move here. He pushed her onto the ground, her wig even falling off in the process. 

“No! You can’t have my baby, bitch! I’ll never get rid of her!”  Oh. This was about Loona. He took out his gun, swinging it around. One of the bodyguards tried tackling him to the ground- wrong move again. Without a second to think, Blitzø shot him in the head, still holding the dog as he did so.

And then it was chaos.

 In a couple seconds, Blitzø had already shot at least four people, and many more were coming to try to stop him. 

Yeah, time to do something, Stolas. “I’m coming, Bliiitzz-” he exclaimed, tripping over himself on the way to the commotion. He tried making his way into it, excusing himself, but to no use. Grabbing the last water bottle left on him, he threw it on someone as a last attempt. 

For… some reason… it worked. He didn’t even want to know what was in this place’s water, because the moment it touched the producer guy’s skin, it started burning its way right off, which was disturbing, but also wildly convenient at the moment. In an instant, the entire set was engulfed by fire, chaos running free as people screamed and ran around aimlessly. One guy almost tripped Stolas, and the prince would certainly have fallen if Blitzø didn’t grab him by the hand, pulling him up to stand again. 

“Alright, let’s go find our daughters,” Blitzø announced. The sight was one for the books, in Stolas’ humble opinion- he stood, holding him in place, shirt quite literally ripped open and gun in his hand, looking fiercely into the distance. The fake hair was a little distracting, but oh was this working for him.

Focus, Stolas! He snapped himself right out of it as they walked out.

“So, what happened back there… it was about Loona, wasn’t it?”

“I don’t wanna talk about it.”

“Oh, that’s fine.” They both stayed in silence for a couple minutes, as Blitzø dragged Stolas around the streets. “Where are we going?”

“Well, where do goth teenage daughters go?” Blitzø showed him his phone screen as he tried to look for Not Topic on his maps app, but it kept suggesting to him this place called Hot Topic, which was a stupid knock-off name for a store. “If we could just find where-”

A portal appeared right in front of them, startling them both. Loona walked through it first. 

“Oh, Loona, my sweet baby girl! I’m so sorry! I’ll never replace you no matter what you-” Blitzø ran up to Loona, meaning to hug her. She wasn’t having it, literally kicking him off of her. Stolas was startled by that, not used to this kind of… affection. “You’re good,” was all she said.

“Dad, I’m so sorry,” Octavia started, looking at the ground as if embarrassed at herself. 

Stolas threw himself onto her immediately, shifting out of his human form and interrupting her with a hug. “I’m just relieved you’re okay! But what could possess you to do such a thing? You know I haven’t taught you spells like this yet.”

“I just wanted to see the stars you promised.”

“The stars?” Stolas looked around, confused. He gasped when he realized what Via meant. “Anathoths’s tears! Oh, no, my dear, sweet Via, I am so-”

Octavia was the one to interrupt him with a hug this time, holding him tight. “I know, dad. It’s okay. You’re here now.”

He smiled, holding her closer to his chest, relieved. 

“Thank you,” he told y/n, holding a hand of hers in his for a brief second, to show his gratitude was sincere. “For finding her. And keeping her safe.”

Blitzø turned to face her too. “S´ppose I should say thank you too or whatever.” He eyed the two holding hands with a weird expression, and it made them withdraw them in an instant.

“Where would the two of you be without me?” Y/n quipped, trying to lessen the awkwardness of whatever had just happened. 

“Okay, don’t flatter yourself too much now,” Blitzø feigned annoyance, but clearly tried to fight a smile. He tried to hug Loona again, but she slapped him across the face with the Grimoire. She didn’t look irritated though. Stolas realized it really was her weird way of showing affection. 

Some sort of colorful shooting stars appeared in their sight but it was as if they were coming from the ground and going through some sort of explosion when they hit the night sky. Weird. Stolas had never seen those in his books. 

It was pretty, nonetheless. 

“What the fuck is that?” Loona questioned, seemingly also enamored by them.

“My acting career,” Blitzø replied bitterly. 

“They’re called fireworks,” y/n explained to them. 

“Fireworks?” Stolas questioned, intrigued. He kept forgetting how much she knew about this realm, and he almost felt inadequate when he was reminded of it. But he’d ask more about them later. 

Now, he was watching the stars with his daughter. 

“Ooh, Look at that one! Did you see that one?” Via asked, excited, and his heart swelled. He’d live in this moment forever if he could. 

“Now, where the fuck are M&M?” Blitzø questioned, which disturbed the moment a bit, but he supposed it was a fair question. Where were the other imps all day?

“Last Mills told me they were…” y/n took out her phone, re-reading the texts sent between them, “‘singing a love-song duet for money’,” she paraphrased.

“Well that makes no sense. Hold on.” Blitzø took out his own phone, texting Millie. She replied within the second.“They’re… still at the alley, apparently.”

“I’ll conjure them a different portal,” Stolas tells them all, waving his hand and conjuring one of his own. “We should return now.”

[. . .]

Back at the palace, Stolas tried to make things seem normal. “So, was your visit to the human realm eventful, at least, sweetheart?”

“Oh, not that much. I spent the whole day trying to find some place where I could see the stars. Turns out you can't really see the stars from there.”

Stolas’ mood deflated. Via noticed. “It’s fine though. I took some cool pictures and we got to see the fireworks!”

“I am really sorry I missed Anathoth’s tears, my sweet Via. I really am.”

“I know you are. I talked to Loona. And Y/n.”

“Whatever about?”

“Well they said you’re not perfect. And you fuck up sometimes. Which is true. But they also said you’re trying, and you’re making an effort. And I can see that now. That’s good for me.”

Stolas couldn’t find his words for a couple of seconds. “...I’m glad it is, darling.”

“I like her.”

“Who?”

“Y/n. As much as I don't like that you… you know. She’s not that bad, I guess.”

“And Blitzø?”

“Don’t push it, dad. That’s all you’re getting from me. I’m gonna go to bed now, alright?” She walked over to him, kissing his cheek. “G´night, dad!”

“Goodnight, Octavia.”

As soon as she was out of sight, he broke down. 

How awful of him, to be so absorbed in his own chaotic life that he didn’t remember, didn’t notice. 

What kind of father was he? 

Was he really the kind to let his daughter think that him fucking up all the time was okay? That it was enough because he was trying? 

Stolas wished to be a father who was there. Who didn’t fuck up. A father who remembered important things and didn’t dismiss his own daughter when she was trying to talk to him about them. A father who didn’t ever have to worry about her being in danger because he paid attention, and prevented her from getting herself into dangerous situations. 

Amidst his own drama, he’d forgotten to be a father altogether. 

How selfish. How awful. How disgusting.

Perhaps whatever it is he had with the two demons did have to end, he reflected. At least in the way it currently stood. 

He had obligations more important than spending his time worrying about whether his feelings were requited, analyzing their behavior for a sliver of hope, tending to their times of need. 

He’d had the time to think of himself, but it seemed he couldn’t trust himself to do so without forgetting to think of others all around. 

And now it was time to think about Octavia. 

He had to be a parent, and if he was unable to do it right while his life was a mess, then he was solving that mess altogether.

He’d deal with the consequences later, and if it shattered him, then so be it. 

[. . .]

Stolas tapped his foot on the floor as he waited, catching himself inspecting the feathers in his forearm and trying to resist the urge to  try and pluck some, more to not make a mess out of the room than to stop the harm of it. For better or for worse, the bandage around his unhealed arm made it impossible to do it without causing excruciating pain. 

The huge door was pulled open in front of him, and he stood up from the couch in the waiting room. 

“Stolas!” Amodeus called, opening his arms to greet him. “Hey there, birdy babe. Haven’t seen you since you crashed my club.” Stolas grimaced at the memory, following the Sin into his office. “How you been?” Ozzie closed the door behind them, leading him inside. He let out a laugh. “Still getting your kink on with my girl and that feisty imp?” 

This was going to be uncomfortable. Stolas let out a nervous laugh, trying to calm himself down before he can get to what he wants to say. 

But he’s doing this. He’s giving them the crystal and setting them free. Free to make a choice, whatever that choice ends up being. 

Stolas almost hopes they will choose him. No, he fully does.

But that’s not his call to make.

Yeah, he’s doing this.

“Well, um, that’s actually what I’m here about.”

A/N:  first bonus chapter comes tomorrow or the day after that! look out for it it has a little hint of something we'll find out in a later chapter <3 i hope you guys like this one, i'm a little self-conscious abt it but it's exactly what i intended it to be so.

[cameronspecial]

A New Kind Of Normal (Part 3)

Pairing: Dad!Rafe Cameron x Reader

Warnings: Fight With A Parent, Swearing, and Fear of Relapse

Pronouns: She/Her

Word Count: 3.0K

Summary: Rafe has accomplished his goals and is now able to meet his daughter for the first time.

Masterlist

Over the past month, Rafe has gotten a chance to learn more about Stella from his weekly meetings with Y/N. Stella was born on May 17th, 2020 at 10:59 A.M. Her first word was Joshy, said at eleven months old when she was calling for help from her uncle Josh when her uncle Benedict would mercilessly tickle her. At two years old, she became obsessed with witches after her mother read her a book about them and it has been her favourite topic of conversation since. Her favourite colour is dark purple and her favourite food is any soup in general because she likes to pretend she is drinking a witch's potion when she eats it. The most important fact of all to Rafe: Stella Rachel Y/L/N is his little girl’s full name. Y/N had tried her best to come up with a name close to Rafe, but all the names closer she found on the internet didn’t go with Stella. Nonetheless, the action still touched him when Y/N told him that was the reason.

And now, he’ll finally get to meet his little star. His hand fidgets with the small nob on his watch, making the hands go clockwise and counterclockwise. He watches as Y/N reads over his toxicology report. She didn’t require him to do a weekly toxicology report to prove that he was staying sober, but he wanted to show her she could trust him. The logical part of him knows she won’t say that he can’t meet Stella, yet a small part of him fears she might. 

The small smile she gives him relieves him of his anxiety, “This is great, Button. I’m so proud of the work you put into staying sober.” Forming a friendship with Y/N was another amazing thing that happened this month. When she started using the nickname she gave him the night Stella was conceived, he felt the air leave his lungs just like it does now. “Thanks. I was really scared that I might relapse this week after I got into an argument with my dad, but I called Diana, did some breathing exercises and looked at my picture of Stella. It all helped me get through it,” he replies truthfully. He had truly felt fear that week when he found himself on the road towards Barry’s trailer. Luckily, he was able to fight through his desire and pull over the car before he got there. Y/N nods and reaches out to place a reassuring hand on his, “Well, I’m glad you were able to recognize your craving and reach out for help with managing it. So do you want to come over after we finish our coffee?” 

His lips stretch so far apart that people would think he is the Joker. He pulls out his phone to check his schedule, “No, I won’t have enough time to go home and change if I come tonight. I also need to get her a few things before I meet her. How about tomorrow afternoon? Is that okay?” “You know you don’t have to make a big deal about this with the changing and the gifts. As long as you love her and show her that love, she is going to reciprocate those feelings,” Y/N argues. 

“I know, I just… Meeting her is all I have been dreaming about for the last month and I want it to be perfect. Plus, it really couldn’t hurt to get her a few bribery toys.”

“I understand how you feel. When Benny came home the week before Stella was born with the wrong colour paint for her room, I almost threw a chair at him. I wanted Finch yellow, but he got funky yellow. It didn’t matter that they were virtually the same colour. I just need her room to be exactly how I planned it. So you can come over tomorrow. Just don’t buy her too many toys.” 

“I can’t be held to a gift-buying limit. I have to make up for five years.”

——

Y/N watches as Stella tries to get ready by herself, thinking about what is going to happen in just ten minutes. “Mommy, help, please,” Stella cries out for help. Y/N’s focus returns to her daughter and she has to stop herself from laughing. Stella has gotten her shirt stuck on her head because she has been trying to get her head through the armhole. Y/N approaches the young girl and helps put her head through the right hole. “You were almost there, Stells. I’m proud of you,” she praises, giving the little girl a kiss on the head. Stella shouts a thank you as she runs into her mom’s room. 

Y/N follows her daughter to her room and carries Stella over to the bed. Once Stella is safely on the bed, Y/N turns toward her dresser to get her perfume. “One tiny spray for this wrist,” Y/N pushes the top of the perfume so the scent falls on her daughter’s wrist. “And one tiny spray for the other. Now, you are ready to go. Why don’t you wait in the living room for Mommy’s special guest to arrive.” The little girl runs off as her mother suggested and Y/N is left alone in her room. She looks at herself in her mirror, wondering how her life is going to change once Stella meets her dad. It’s not that Y/N doesn’t trust Rafe, he has shown her that he really is trying. It’s that Stella isn’t going to be solely Y/N’s anymore. She will have to share some parenting duties with Rafe and it feels strange for her to do that. She is the one who stayed up with Stella when she was puking all night last year. She is the one who would read the little girl a bedtime story every day. She is the one Stella goes to when she is scared. Now, Y/N is going to have to learn to let Rafe do those things too. 

Rafe nervously wipes the sweat off of his palm and adjusts the hat on his head. The time on the clock shows he is five minutes early, but he can’t wait any longer. He knocks on the door and rocks on the balls of his feet. The door creaks open, yet Rafe is met with an empty doorway. It is only when he looks down that he sees the perfect little star staring up at him with her brilliant blue eyes. “Stella Rachel Y/L/N, what have I told you about answering the door to strangers?” Y/N scolds, walking into the room with an adorable motherly look. Stella looks back at her mother with a pouty look, “I’m sorry, Mommy. But I knows we were going to have a special guest.”

Rafe is in awe at how adorable she is, but he takes this as his chance to do the first fatherly act he will ever do. “Your mother is right, Stella. What if I was a stranger?” he poses, kneeling down to her level. She gives him wide eyes, “But you weren’t. You are the man who Mommy yelled at.” Her words cause pain to shoot through his heart. The first memory his little girl has of him is his argument with her mother. Y/N can see the hurt that crosses Rafe’s face and beckons the pair away from the doorway. “Yes, he is, Baby. But he apologized to Mommy and we are friends again. Did you see his hat?” Y/N points out. The small blue eyes move from his face up to his head and her eyes turn to delight. “You’re wearing a witch’s hat!” she exclaims, reaching up to her father’s head to try it on. “Can I try it on, please?” Glad that his conversation start is working, he takes the hat off and places it on her tiny head. Everyone giggles as the big hat falls over her eyes. 

Now, that the ice has been sufficiently broken, Y/N decides it is time to make the introduction Rafe has been waiting for. “Stella, do you know why I asked my special friend to come visit?” Y/N sits on the couch, bringing Stella on her lap. The little girl shakes her head and rests it on her mother’s chest. “He’s your Daddy, Baby.” The excitement in his daughter’s eyes as she turns toward him sends him over the moon. The tiny girl flings herself into her arms and screams his new name. He never thought someone would call him those words, but now it’s the only one he wants to hear. “Does that mean you can play witch with me? I have a hat you can borrow.” With her now in his arms, he can smell the familiar vanilla fragrance of Y/N’s perfume. It makes him smile that she wants to be just like her mommy. Before he can answer, she runs off to her room to get her toys. She returns dragging a big plastic cauldron behind her. Rafe feels his father's instinct kick in. He jumps off of the couch and runs over to pick her and the cauldron up in his arms. Stella looks at him in awe, “Wow, my Daddy is super strong.” This absolutely kills him and he kisses her on the cheek. 

——

Y/N, Stella and Rafe have spent the afternoon playing various games their daughter wanted to play. When it got closer to dinner time, the three of them worked together to make something to eat. “Button, can you please pour me some more water?” Y/N asks, holding up her glass for him to do it. He picks up the water pitcher and pours it for her, “Of course, Buttercup.” Stella may be three and eleven months old, but she is very observant. Throughout the afternoon, she noticed the tiny glances Rafe would send Y/N’s way. She noticed how his hand would reach to find her skin, yet it never seemed to land. She noticed how he would always ask for Y/N’s approval. And just now, she saw how his lips formed a massive smile because of her mother’s attention. 

The small girl starts to form a plan in her head; she can see how much her father is pining for her mother. He clearly needs her help. “Mommy, I like Daddy’s hair. Do you?” she questions, looking back and forward between her parents. Y/N looks up from her food to look at Rafe, “I do like his hair. It looks nice when the front of his hair falls down like a little curtain.” He stops mid-stab of the pasta to look up at her through his lashes. “I’ll take note of that then, Buttercup,” he brings his hand up to hide the blush on his cheeks. Stella is very satisfied with the results of the beginning of her plan. She feels like a genius. Y/N doesn’t know that she is going to regret letting Stella watch Hallmark movies with her. 

——

After dinner, Rafe is preparing for the roughly hour-and-a-half drive back to the Outer Banks. Stella is holding on to Rafe for dear life because she isn’t ready for him to go. “Mommy, why can’t Daddy stay?” she begs, looking at her mother sadly. Y/N frowns at her daughter, “I’m sorry, Baby. Not yet, there is nowhere for him to sleep. Plus, Daddy has work tomorrow and you have daycare.” Rafe can see the struggle Y/N is having with saying no to Stella and he helps her out. “How about I go over to the diner on Friday? I’ll be there when you get back from daycare. Maybe I’ll even have a surprise,” he offers, whispering the last part in her ear. 

The darling’s eyes light up like a Christmas tree and loosens her arms from his neck. “Okay! I can’t wait to see you. Bye, Daddy. I love you,” she bids adieu. She hops down from his arms and runs to get ready for bed. The quicker she goes to bed, the faster Friday comes. Rafe calls back I love you. The two adults laugh at the child as they watch her run off. The laughter dies down and Y/N turns her body toward Rafe. “It’s okay that I come by on Friday, right?” Rafe confirms with a hopeful smile. 

“Of course, as long as you are sober, I won’t stop you from seeing her. The extra business is good too.” 

“Haha, I’ll make sure to deposit my paycheck before I go in then. Also, please let me know if you need anything. Money for food, rent, toys, clothes, tuition. Anything, okay. I want to pull my weight. She’s my daughter too.”

“I will, I promise. Thank you for coming over tonight. You made her day.”

They both look at each other for a second and then notice the time. “I should probably get going. It’s getting late,” Rafe concludes, taking a step closer to the door. Y/N tries to hide her slight disappointment, “Uh, yeah. Drive safe. See you on Friday.” Rafe nods his head and opens the door. “See you on Friday.” Y/N stays by the door as she watches Rafe walk down her driveway. She waves goodbye to him as he gets into his car and drives away. Once he is out of sight, she closes the door and reflects on the day. It was strange to have Rafe there, but she doesn’t regret the decision. She saw how much he cared for Stella and it solidified the idea in her mind that he is meant to be a father. This is a new kind of normal that she can get used to. 

——

Since Sarah and Rafe moved out of Tannyhill, Ward insisted on having family dinner every week. Everyone knows Sarah’s departure is the main reason why Ward wanted to do so, especially since Ward tried to have just Sarah come to dinner. However, thanks to Sarah, Ward gave in to inviting Rafe. Most dinners start with Ward getting small talk with Rafe about work out of the way before he moves on with asking Sarah about a full second-by-second breakdown of her week. And this Wednesday is not any different, but Rafe has something else other than work to talk to his dad about. 

“Actually, Dad, there is something I want to talk to you about,” Rafe brings to the table, looking Ward dead in his eyes. Ward stops chewing, not really expecting Rafe to have anything else to say. Ward tilts the end of his fork toward Rafe, “Okay, what is it?” “I have a daughter. Her name is Stella. She is three years old, almost four. And she looks exactly like me,” Rafe gets everything out in one go. He may have known about Stella for a month now, but he didn’t want to tell his family until he knew he could step up and be the person his daughter needed. This causes everyone at the table to freeze and look at Rafe in surprise. Ward’s eyes narrow; his brows become one. “What do you mean?” he gets out in a rough tone. 

“I mean that five years ago, I had sex with Y/N and she had a baby nine months after that. I didn’t know about Stella until last month. I didn’t want to tell you guys until I was a month sober and certain that I could be there for her.”

“You better tell me that this is a joke because I can’t believe that you could be that much of a screw-up. How do you even know she is your daughter?”

“I told you, she looks exactly like me.”

“How do you know that’s not because you want to believe she does? How do you know that bitch isn’t lying to you? You were so useless that you didn’t even get a paternity.” 

Rafe stands up at what Ward calls Y/N and points a finger at his father. “You have no right to call her that. I know she isn’t lying because I trust her. I won’t make her get a paternity test,” he yells. Ward lets out a low chuckle, “Okay, fine. Do whatever you want. But I’m going to need you to get a lawyer and write up a contract for child support if that’s what the bitch is after. There is no way you are actually going to raise that kid.” “You need to stop calling the mother of your granddaughter a bitch. And why can’t I raise my daughter? You are always telling me I need to take responsibility and I am. Why can’t you just be proud of me?” he argues, his anger getting to a whole other level. The other members of the dinner see that this fight is not about to end any time soon, so Sarah steps in. “Dad, stop. This isn’t going anywhere. And you should be proud of Rafe. He overcame his addiction just so that he could be a better father. That’s amazing and I’m proud of him for that. I, for one, am excited to meet my niece,” Sarah reasons. Wheezie butts in too, “I want to meet Stella too.” Rafe gives them a thankful smile but gets up angrily.  

“Thank you guys for your support. I’ll talk to Y/N to find out when you can meet Stells. Dad, I wish I could say that I am surprised but I’m not,” he begins. “No matter what I do, I will never compare to Sarah and I won’t force you to meet your granddaughter. I think I’m going to go. Goodbye.” Rafe storms out of the house and slams the door. He gets to his truck and is about to drive away, yet he knows he shouldn’t. If he goes now, he is scared it will lead him to Barry’s. Instead, he pulls out his phone and dials a number that recently entered his contacts. “Hey, Button. Is everything okay?” Her voice is like a light guiding him back to home base. He vehemently shakes his head, “No, I’m not. Do you have time to talk?” Y/N immediately stops what she is doing and gives him her full attention for the whole night. 

Taglist: @loves0phelia @thelomlisrafecameron @wickedlovely121 @thepatriarchykeychain @drewsmusee @starkowswife @maybankslover @forstarkey @loving-and-dreaming @drewstarkeyswifehoe @kisstaya @magicalyoura @mp-littlebit @loverfu55ii @dark1paradise @sublimepenguinpeach-blog @alyisdead @emeloyy @js-a-writer

[collecting-stories]

Hey hey hope I’m not too late with this 🫢

100 Compliments - #72 "You always look good."

Brian “Otis” Zvonecek x fem because Otis always does look so good in everything he wears 😍

You Always Look Good - Brian 'Otis' Zvonecek

Summary: Otis dresses up for a shift at Molly's in hopes of impressing you.

A/N: Sorry this took so long to write! School has been crazy!!

✰ ✰ ✰ ✰

"Look at you," Stella teased, pinching Otis' side as she walked past him behind the bar at Molly's . 

Otis flinched at the feeling, shoving her hand away, as his cheeks reddened. "I look the same as I always do," he defended. Still, he straightened the button down shirt that he was wearing, navy with little pineapples printed all over it. 

Stella was unbothered by Otis' defensiveness. She stopped and looked back at him, eyes traveling up and down as she assessed him. "I don't know, something different 'bout you tonight," she replied, "you do something to your hair?"

"No," he insisted, running a hand subconsciously through his hair. 

Sensing his unusually high nerves, Stella offered him a smile, "okay. I'm not trying to give you a hard time, I promise." 

Just like she knew he would, Otis deflated, leaning against the bar and looking toward the door of Molly's before looking back at Stella. "I've been...putting feelers out...I met someone, here. She works at the hospital and she's...she's awesome. Incredible. Gorgeous. And I just wanna ya know, look good."

Before Stella could respond to his spiral of nerves, a voice cut in from the other side of the bar, "you always look good."

Otis' eyes went wide and he turned quickly to see the very person of his affection, you, standing there smiling at him. 

"Hey," you gave a small wave, leaning against your side of the bar as if that might lessen the distance the wooden countertop created between you and Otis. 

Stella backed away, smiling from ear to ear and no doubt going to find Herrmann or Mouch (or anyone that she could gossip with about you and Otis and how red he had turned when you told him that he looked good). 

"Hey," he replied, mimicking your wave but quickly lowering his hand in case you could tell how clammy his palms felt right now. If Cruz was here he would definitely give him a hard time for acting like this. Not that anyone could accuse him of being suave but he wasn't lacking in confidence either. Well, he was lacking in the kind of confidence Severide or Casey possessed but he had a decent amount. "Can I, uh, get you a beer? Or something?"

"A beer is good," you replied, taking a seat on one of the stools and watching Otis as he grabbed a bottle of Blue Moon for you, "so...I'm awesome?" 

"And incredible," he admitted, a smile creeping onto his face, "and gorgeous." 

"A triple threat," you teased, "guess we're evenly matched then?"

It took a few seconds for the words to process in Otis' head, the recognition slowly taking over as he nodded almost dumbly, full on smile breaking through and ears going as red as the rest of his face was. "Yeah?" He meant to sound less like a question but he couldn't help the way his voice raised at the end of the word, turning it into uncertainty. 

"Definitely," you replied holding up your pointer finger as you listed out the first of three things, "awesome: you watched all the Star Wars movies with me in one sitting -"

"I mean, you can't not celebrate May 4th correctly."

You held up your middle finger next, ignoring him, "Incredible: you literally save people's lives like, on the daily," finally you held up your thumb, "Gorgeous: self-explanatory. Look at you."

Otis leaned against the bar, trying to look casual and not completely flustered by your comment.  "Well, I can't argue with that."

You laughed, "oh can't you?" and leaned over the rest of the way to kiss him. 

"Hey! No PDA with the customers Otis!" Herrmann shouted from the other side of the bar. 

You pulled away trying to fight a smile as you looked down the bar to Herrmann, Mouch, and Stella, who had obviously been watching you and Otis the entire time. 

"How late are you working then?" You asked, "I mean, how many bartenders does this place need tonight?" You glanced around Molly's, slow for a random Tuesday, and then back to Otis, "not that I'm suggesting you ditch your job."

"No, of course not," he said, already turning to Herrmann, "I'm gonna head out, seems like you and Stella have it covered."

"Whoa-"

"Have fun!" Stella cut in, smiling mischievously, "be safe!"

"Oh god," the pink cheeks were back on Otis as he rounded the counter to meet you on your side. 

"Hey, she didn't pay for her beer!" Herrmann realized as he watched you and Otis make a break for the door. 

[yenqa]

ADVANTAGES

in which…

on jay’s live, fans point out a stuffed animal on his bed, one that seems to be the other piece to your notorious missing pair. as imaginary pieces start to connect for fans, the viewers beg for some kind of interaction. and though you and jay have never met before, why not use this situation to your advantage?

warnings : haters ❌, y/n is a roblox player

wc : 1028

green hair

“Hi, chat!” You wave to the camera, watching as viewers flow in. You prop your legs up, hugging your knees as you try to read the overflowing chat.

strawberrylimesoda : HII Y/NNN

popcornpops : WE MISSED YOUU

Laughing at the sweet comment, answering “Chat, I streamed two days ago, remember?”

Messages flow in as you try to keep up with the fast paced comments. Though you can barely comprehend them quick enough to answer one, your eye catches on one.

Bluebirdfly : IS JAY WITH YOU?

Your smile falters slightly, ignoring the comment with an awkward chuckle, “Anyways, how are you guys?”

stellaverse : IM GOODD HOW ARE YOU??? I LOVE YOUR HAIRR

“Thank you, Stella! I styled it better today for some reason.” Brushing your hands between your front strands, you fix the hairs that are sticking out. Your eyes catch on the viewer count deciding to actually start the stream. Clapping, you welcome everybody in.

“Welcome to my stream everyone!” A smile grows on your face, ready for the reaction of your chat.

You pause to build suspense, then soon continuing “Today we have a special guest joining us!” Using your desk as a drum, you point to the camera, letting your guest know to say something. Jay’s low tone fill your headphones. “Hi, chat.”

The comments spiral, reading some, “Guys stop—Hyeju’s not my only friend, everyone please welcome Jay!”

You could hear the grin Jay has on his face, saying “Don’t get too excited Y/n.”

Rolling your eyes, you snap back “Wasn’t planning on it.”

Folding in your lips you can hear Jay barely holding his laugh in, letting out a snicker. You both burst into laughter, you hit the chair slightly, laughing at your antics.

Letting your giggles die down, you open the game you’re going to play, reading the recognizable “ROBLOX” loading screen. Spotting a green dot next to Jay’s username you click on his profile automatically joining him.

Switching tabs so the stream can see your joining screen, you watch as the chat laughs at the game choice.

Jay’s voice fills your ears again, a slight rasp to it, “She chose the game, guys. Not me.”

Your jaw drops, retorting, “Nothing wrong with Royale high, it’s the best dress up game on the planet.” Your eyes meet the familiar castle, walking up to the fountain you’re met with Jay’s avatar. Though clearly not decorated at all since he made the account, you can’t help but laugh at his skin.

“Hey wait—you have to go through the intro to get here, have you played this game before, Jay?” You accuse.

His avatar turns away from you, “No comment.” He replies.

ilovegreenbeans : JAY PLAYS ROYALE HIGH ON THE DAILY I BET

Giggling, you read the comment so Jay can respond, “Someone said that you play Royale high on the daily, is that true?” You tilt your head slightly, awaiting his remark back.

“Hey! I do not play Royale High a lot. I joined yesterday so I could get through the intro—It was for the good of the stream!”

You skeptically nod, letting out an “Uh-huh” before showing Jay how to decorate his avatar and how to get special hair colors. It’s much harder to help him when you’re not next to him, but this would work for now.

“Jay if you want the cool hair colors you have to buy the gamepass!” You nag him.

He sighs, “Y/n I am not spending money on this game, no matter how little.”

“I know you want that bright green hair, it would look so awesome on your avatar! Jay please—for the stream. Chat, help me convince him! Spam “Jay buy the gamepass!”

Comments flood in, all chanting the same four words over and over again. Pointing to the chat right next to your webcam you exclaim, “See the chat agrees too!”

lilaclavender : JAY FOR THE STREAM BUY THE GAMEPASS

Bluebirdfly : JAY BUY THE GAMEPASS 🙏

strawberrylimesoda : WE NEED GREEN HAIR JAY

“That’s because you told them to—whatever I give up, give me a second to buy it.” His audibly exhale is covered by your cheers, clapping your hands together as you excitedly tell chat that it worked.

user18127983 : AWW HES SO WHIPPED FOR HER

popcornpops : need a man who cant say no to me like jay cant say no to y/n

You want to smile at the comments, but you’re unsure whether or not to prove those to be false. Instead you let it go, deciding that it wasn’t worth replying. A minute or two passes by, you’re entertaining your viewers when you spot Jay’s bright green hair from the corner of your eye. You squeal, commenting, “Jay it looks so good! Aren’t you glad you decided to buy the gamepass?”

He lets out his nth sigh of the stream, and you take that answer as a “yes”.

☆

Two hours later you say goodbye to your viewers, ending a stream with a relieved sigh, finally leaning back into your chair.

“Tired?” He asks, before you can answer, you let a yawn out, eyes watery.

He laughs, urging you to go get ready for bed. You drowsily get up, basically stomping to the bathroom with your heaved footsteps. You brush your teeth and do your skincare before walking back to your desk, you see Jay’s webcam, waiting for you on his phone.

“Did you get ready for bed before the stream?” You ask, positioning your headphones to a comfortable position. His head shoots up, a soft smile grows when he sees your bare face.

“If I start the stream after like 9:00 I always do, so after I could crash. But today I’m not that tired for some reason.”

You hum, nodding as best as you can. He spots how your head falls every few seconds, and how your eyes drop “Hey—Y/n you can go to sleep, it’s okay.”

He doesn’t get a response from you, but he doesn’t mind. In fact he finds it kind of cute how you are when you’re sleepy. He lets out a soft “Sweet dreams” before finding a comfortable spot on his chair and drifting off to sleep.

☆

back masterlist next

yenqa > if you dont know what royale high is, its just a fairy dress up game thats based off winx

taglist : @yeokii @hanniluvi @euncsace @taejaysmain @mrchweeee @fakeuwus @ashy1um @rikisly @filmofhybe @nwjws @yizhoutv @soov @tocupid @tzke1ta @yannew @manooffline @mars101 @haechansbbg @enhaz1 @teddywonss @en-happiness @kim2005bomi @sunooscheek @luvswonyoung @flwoie @lilriswife4life @nicholasluvbot @ikeusol @lylovw @alwayswook @astrae4 @choi-beomgyulvr @aishigrey @infpistj @jiawji @planethyuka @mari-oclock @222brainrot @jakevascaino @rory-cant-sleep @hyehae @vixensss @hearts4hanni @kgneptun @tongtongie @www-jungwon @lovejunz @fluerz @jiyeons-closet

yenqa © please do not copy, steal or translate.

[pengweng-quack]

Being a Witch with Vampires

Carlisle Cullen x Witch!OC

Summary: Stella (A witch) and Carlisle (A vampire), and how they blossomed from roommates to friends(?) to partners

Chapter 1/7

Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Chapter 4, Chapter 5, Chapter 6, Chapter 7

Notes:

This was inspired by this fanfic on tumblr by lis-likes-fics titled "In My Defense, I Was Left Unsupervised"

This is also on Ao3 under the same title and same username too if you'd like to read it there (https://archiveofourown.org/works/53448940)

Posting is random lol, hope you guys enjoy this story

Word Count: 5095 words

TW for this chapter: vomitting, blood mentions

Masterlist

~1700~

Stella Allicere was out and about late at night. She'd just come out of a heated argument with her partner, in which the two of them were on the verge of casting terrible spells at each other had she not decided to just leave. With the dramatic rise in vampire assaults in Italy, which she knew that the Volturi was behind, she knew she shouldn't be out this late. But she'd rather battle vampires than deal with her demanding, controlling mate.

“Witch’s blood. Enticing.” A voice hissed behind her, getting her attention “Never thought I’d live to tell the tale of tasting one.”

“Now, now, we shall not be selfish in what could be shared.” Another voice scolded. She had a feeling there were four vampires around, but she was never good at guessing, so she braced herself for more.

“And she feels our presence.” A third voice taunted, and with their vampiric speed, there were at least five vampires in front of her

“You wouldn’t want this, I assure you.” Stella said, preparing herself for another battle

“And the witch speaks!” A feminine voice fake cheered, earning mocking laughs from the other

“I suggest you don’t attack her.” A tone that expresses nothing but superiority ordered from behind Stella “You do know the treaty that we have with witches, right?”

“And once we've drained every ounce of blood from her, that pact will still be honored.” The leader of the coven hissed at the guy “The treaty only asks to not attack them. It said nothing about not finishing the witch themselves.”

“I’m too tired to deal with anything today. Give me a break.” Stella sighed and motioned for the five vampires to be lifted into the air with her hands. Red cords were now all around them, barring any movement from the five vampires, thanks to another movement of her hands.

The red ropes caught fire in an instant. Thanks to additional manipulation from the witch's fingers, the wire was now on their neck, gently but steadily detaching their heads from their bodies. The heads of the vampires were detached and flung away with a single snap from her, while the body was left to burn.

“You looked to be having a bad day if you were killing vampires in this manner.” The guy earlier, who was watching in astonishment, pointed out, as he steps closer to Stella

“Don’t wonder too much. Curiosity kills the cat.” Stella growled, snapping her fingers and watching the decapitated vampires' bodies burn to ash

“Carlisle Cullen.” The guy, Carlisle, introduced himself “An honor to meet your kind.”

“Stella Allicere.” Stella introduced herself, just to be civil

“What got you so heated up in the first place?” Carlisle inquired as she turned around and began going in the opposite direction. He seemed to take that as an invitation to go around with her, so he did just that.

“My mate. Or so they say is my mate.” Stella replied, accepting the vampire's unannounced but not unwanted presence

“Do you witches just not know whether someone is their mate or not?” He asked curiously

“We just feel it, we don’t particularly just know.” She answered quickly “Why, do you get some sort of feeling when someone is your mate?”

“Wouldn’t know myself, I haven’t met my mate.” Carlisle answered with a shrug

“You work for the Volturi, right?” Stella asked, and he nodded without hesitation “Are you planning on drinking my blood?”

“Despite my colleagues' attempts to persuade me to drink human or witch blood, I have no desire to do so as we could survive just fine with animal blood as an alternative.” He answered earnestly 

“Interesting.” Stella nodded “That explains your golden eyes in comparison to the red eyes I've seen on other vampires, doesn't it?”

“Exactly.” He answered her curiosity

Throughout the night, the two of them continued to talk and wander around the city. Only until the sunshine struck Carlisle's arm, where it began to gleam brightly, did they realize they'd spent the night together. 

Stella was astounded by what she was witnessing; what she believed were legends was literally happening right in front of her eyes. The shimmer reminded Stella of diamonds being struck by light, but it was clear on Carlisle’s face that it wasn't something he wanted her to witness.

“Please accept my apologies; I believe the clock is signaling that it is time for me to return back to the castle.” Carlisle said sheepishly, pulling his arm away to the shadow areas

Stella turned the skies cloudy with a wave of her fingers, allowing Carlisle to walk around freely as they spent the last minutes before they had to part ways.

For eternity?

She hopes not.

“You didn’t have to—

“Well, good for you, because I wanted to.” Stella answered with a small smile just as they reach the Volturi castle

“Are you safe?” Carlisle asked “You know, from your mate?”

“I was deemed the blessed witch of today way back when my mother was still carrying me, therefore I should be able to defend myself enough.” Stella answered with a chuckle, sensing his genuine concern on her “And, you know, I have a certain vegetarian vampire on standby in case I can't handle him alone.”

“You already know who to seek.” Carlisle giggled, playfully winking at her

“I seem to have forgotten. You don’t mind reminding me, do you?” Stella teased, a smile slowly forming on the corners of her lips

Stella looked at Carlisle, his gold eyes showing nothing other than kindness and compassion. ‘He was different,’ she noted. If he ever offers her to be his everlasting mate, she would ponder before answering.

He’s different.

Carlisle's golden eyes flashed at that moment. He desired nothing more than to disappear into the witch's grey eyes. It perplexed him since he'd read a lot of books in his life, but none of them specifically mentioned a vampire-witch pairing. And, given that he had barely met Stella, he was cautious to claim her as his mate too. He did, however, desire her presence with him always.

Carlisle may deny it, but he has a sneaking suspicion that this certain confident witch will be his everlasting companion.

~1720~

“Who decided that knocking at night is acceptable?” Stella hissed as she opened the door, only to discover Carlisle, who appeared to have been in a fight. His once posh looking hair was messy, and he seemed to be rattled, and in a rush

“Join me.” He invited at once

“Join you in what?” Stella asked “And what happened to you?”

“I left the Volturi.” He answered “Aro didn’t take it well. He ordered the guards to try and stop me.”

“Carlisle!” Stella scolded “What were you thinking?!”

“Who’s in there?” Sam, Stella’s supposed mate, asked.

If Carlisle had a heart, it would have dropped in realization already. He was forcing her to leave her mate, whether declared or not. He was robbing her of a life of peace. But he needed her.

He’ll always need her.

“None of your concern.” Stella answered to him before he turned around and closed the door of his room

“Join me.” Carlisle invited again

Stella would not deny that the previous two decades he's spent with Carlisle had made her question whether a witch-vampire mate was feasible, despite the fact that no texts backed the theory. 

Now that Carlisle is encouraging her to live a life other than that of a housewife, she realizes that it wasn't her desire to leave that lifestyle that prompted her to consider joining, but rather the simple fact that Carlisle was the one inviting her.

She would choose a life with Carlisle, no matter how rough the outcome will be.

“No pressure, dear Stella,” Carlisle said, looking warily behind him “But we have to move now if we want to be away quickly.”

“Give me a moment to prepare some stuff.” Stella argued before motioning her hands and allowing a number of her belongings to fly around and land in a neighboring trunk.

“How about Sam?” Carlisle asked

As Carlisle watched Stella scramble around the house for stuff that she thinks they’ll need while on the run, all he could think about was how much he wanted Stella to accompany him on his journey around the world. Forgetting that Stella has a partner with whom she has spent more time than they have. 

He knew it was selfish of him to request Stella's presence 

But he wanted nothing more than to be selfish of her.

“He’s not my mate.” Stella simply said, grabbing the trunk and walking out the house with Carlisle “You know he’s not my mate.”

“He deserves to know,” Carlisle argued

“And if he knew, I wouldn’t be able to accompany you. He’ll bring this to my family, his family. We wouldn’t even be able to step out of Italy.” Stella argued back “So much in asking me to join you.”

With what she stated, Carlisle remained silent. Stella clearly desired to reclaim the independence she had lost when Sam was announced as her partner. But now, as they walked to the outskirts of town, he was deep in contemplation, debating whether bringing her into the mess he had created was a good idea or a selfish gesture.

“Are you second-guessing?” Stella asked him

“You have till now to express your disinterest in joining me. I'll understand.” Carlisle realized that he needed to provide her with a choice. If he pulls her away from everything she's built, he'll feel extremely terrible

“Don't you think if I wasn’t truly interested in joining you, I would have notified you as soon as possible?” Stella asked him. Why was he second-guessing his decision when she was a self-assured witch who would speak out when she believed it was necessary?

“Are you sure?” Carlisle asked her again

“Yes,” Stella answered without hesitation

“You’re not getting rid of me that easily now, you know?” Carlisle asked her, lightening the mood the he ruined earlier

“Well, good for me. I’m not sure for you though.” Stella shrugged, before smiling widely at him

Carlisle realized that the punishments he would have from the Volturi was something he couldn't easily avoid but he was assured that he would be secure with the assistance of her confident witch. At least for the time being.

~1918~

“Stella?” Carlisle called, entering the home the two own. Carlisle was well aware that there were days when Stella was completely absorbed in her studies, and the mere sight of him after he stayed for a while helping in the hospitals surprised her. So much for being a witch who is mindful of her surroundings.

“Here!” Stella announced, stepping out of the kitchen

“Baking?” Carlisle asked, seeing the stray flour on her cheeks. 

‘She looked so…human at that moment. And it was like I was her husband, getting home from work.’

‘Husband?’

‘Do I want her to be my wife?’

“Yeah, it got too messy seeing as— who is he?” Stella asked, cutting Carlisle’s pondering as she sees the new guy behind Carlisle, who was trying to sneak away

“Edward Cullen.” Carlisle introduced to the shy guy who stopped in his tracks once he was called out

“Carlisle—

“His mother begged me to keep him alive—

“Not for eternity!”

Carlisle was terrified at the prospect of Stella being outraged by his decision. He was terrified of offending her in any way after their first encounter. However, she just must understand this one. 

“That’s why you were gone for a while, weren’t you?” Stella asked in and oddly calm manner “Because you were helping his thirst?”

“You know he won't be able to control himself if he was exposed to you too soon,” Carlisle explained “Because the smell of your blood is very alluring to us vampires.”

“You got him under control now, right?” Stella asked again in the same calm tone

“Yes, but in the meanwhile, I recommend that you share a room with me.” Carlisle offered, getting Stella to raise her eyebrows at him “You know, for your safety?”

“Sure.” Stella agreed, though not convinced that it was just the reason

“Please don’t think of things like that.” Edward asked in a barely audible tone

“You can read my mind?” Stella asked quietly

“I can hear both of your thoughts, yours a bit harder but I could still do so. Both are messy and all over the place.” He replied, answering her question “However, I chose to concentrate on only one. It wasn't really enjoyable.”

“Alright, I’ll keep note of your telepathy.” Stella frowned, knowing that she doesn’t have any sort of privacy now if it weren’t for her own mental abilities “Carlisle, mind if we have a talk?”

“Y-yeah.” Carlisle stuttered, and quickly followed her to their shared room in the mean time

“You owe me an explanation.” Stella hissed at him the moment the door of their room was shut

“And I’ll give it, just calm down pretty woman.” Carlisle said, sitting on the bed that he had in his room, for aesthetic purposes obviously

“Spanish Influenza, he was nearing death.” Carlisle started, staring at the witch, who was waiting for additional information, in front of him “His mother pleaded with me to save him and keep him alive; I know I have you, and that's more than enough; but he was alone in this world. His mother had died, his father had died, and he was alone. I couldn't abandon him, you understand that, right?”

“This won’t be the last time you’re doing that, are you?” Stella asked with raised eyebrows

Carlisle was at a loss for what to say in response to her desire for a commitment. He was a doctor who saved lives and was ready to convert people into vampires to save them, but was this ethical? 

“It won’t be.” Stella answered to her own question “Look, let’s come down to an agreement.”

“I let you know if I’m turning someone into a vampire?” Carlisle asked her

“No. That’s too much work. And you need to help their thirst before you introduce them to me anyways.” Stella disagreed “You quickly explain to me if you’re taking another vampire home, no trying to hide them or anything.”

“That could be managed.” Carlisle said, standing up and hugging Stella, feeling the warmth of her skin in contrast to his cold ones

~1933~

“Carlisle— hello there.” Stella said, startled at the presence of another woman in their living room

“Rosalie Hale.” Edward introduced to the woman

“Are you alright?” Stella quickly asked, sensing how she was anxious

“Stella— and you’ve met her before I introduced her to you.” Carlisle said as he walked into the room before seeing that Stella has met Rosalie already, making him sigh lightly “I’m nearing me getting yelled at by you again, huh?”

“You’re terrible at hiding surprises.” Stella teased lightly before sitting next to Rosalie

“Are you also a vampire?” Rosalie asked her, ‘it seemed like she wasn’t enticed by her blood’ Stella noted

“No.” Stella answered, shaking her head “But, I'm a witch if you’re wondering, there's no need to be afraid of harming me so terribly. I'm almost as tough as all vampires. Can fend off myself.”

“Almost.” Carlisle gave emphasis to the word

“What happened to you anyways?” Stella asked her

“Monsters happened. They’re all monsters.” Rosalie said through gritted teeth “I’ll get them back. Slowly and brutally.”

“Who did this to you?” Stella asked again, feeling a sense of protecting the woman next to her right now

“Her fiancé and his friends.” Edward answered, probably seeing the answer to Stella’s question in Rosalie’s thoughts

“I’m getting you a gown to wear when murdering them.” Stella decided at once, standing up and walking to her room to prepare for getting the gown

“Stella.” Carlisle warned, close on her heel as they enter their room

“Are they together?” Rosalie asked Edward who could only shrug in response

“Been with them since the 1920’s, never had an answer if they were together.” Edward answered “So, much for being the mind reader, don’t you think?”

Carlisle could only watch as Stella used her magic to create the perfect wedding gown for Rosalie as they entered the chamber. He quickly saw how determined Stella was to assisting Rosalie with her vengeance, something that she was always so against with. And that changed his opinion on her.

He just realized how right he was with his suspicion all those decades ago.

~1935~

“Carlisle!” Rosalie’s desperate voice yelled from outside, startling the two who were having a lazy day

“Carlisle! Stella!” Edward now called out, getting the two to quickly stand up and see why both Rosalie and Edward were calling for them

Stella and Carlisle were both surprised to see a bleeding guy on Rosalie's arm as they walked out of the room. She was visibly upset, prompting Stella and Carlisle to act quickly. 

“What happened?” Carlisle asked, seeing for any signs of survival on the man

“He was mauled and assaulted by a bear. I was going to personally change him, but I wasn't sure I'd be able to do it, his blood is enticing me so much. So, I brought him to you.” Rosalie sobbed, and it was clear that if tears could flow down her cheeks that she had already shed some. 

“You have to help him Carlisle.” Edward, who was always so against with Carlisle changing people to vampires, begged him. Stella had a feeling that he saw how distressed Rosalie’s thoughts were, and that got him to help her in getting Carlisle to change the man

“Stella, can you prolong his existence for a little longer?” Carlisle asked

“I can’t.” Stella immediately responded, knowing that it was a different branch of magic, one that she had sworn she would never study in fear of being hooked to it and using it in exchange of accepting the consequences

“You have to do it now.” Stella urged him, sensing the life fading away from the man in Rosalie’s arm

With Stella’s urging, as well as Edward and Rosalie’s begging, Carlisle went and bit his neck. Starting the man’s transformation to a vampire. Soon, he was pulling away from the guy’s neck. Wiping his mouth and looking at the guy 

“Stella?” Carlisle asked, seeing the sickened look on the witch’s face. In a quick act, Carlisle took Stella and carried her bridal style, taking her to the rest room where she just barely made it to the toilet. He patiently watched as she started puking her guts out in disgust from what she just witnessed

"I'm sorry, you didn't have to witness that." Stella murmured, just as Carlisle passed her a bundled-up tissue which she used to wipe her mouth

"Are you alright?" Carlisle asked, rubbing her back in an attempt to soothe her down

"It must have been all too much for me." Stella weakly answered, resting her figure on the bathroom walls and catching her breath

"It's alright. No need to feel bad just because you reached your limits." Carlisle assured her “Though, why’d you stay?”

"I was already feeling sick the moment Rosalie brought him in, you know, the blood and everything, but I wanted to stay. Because Rosalie was lost and didn't know what to do at that moment. I tried extremely hard to keep it together until it was all done, but it was just too much." Stella rambled, while Carlisle watched her with nothing but adoration on his face

Carlisle was well aware of Stella's willingness to make sacrifices for their new forming family; her being with them was already a huge risk for her. But the fact that she sat through something she didn't want to watch to console his adoptive daughter made his dead heart quiver. She was the reason he felt human again.

All those decades ago, it was just a feeling Stella was his match. But now, he knew Stella was his soul mate. He just needed to know if she felt the same way for him as well

‘Or if this was all a ploy for your demise’ a part of his brain taunted to him

Knowing about how her blood affects vampires from one of her books lightly scared him. Though it also proved his point that the witches have always been stronger than vampires. It’s just the vampires are more…full of themselves, as she says.

Would she really spend this long just for one vampire’s demise?

Everyone was looking forward to the newborn vampire's emergence a few days later. Rosalie is more jittery than normal due to her anxiety. Carlisle has ordered Stella to remain away for a time, to her dismay, but with the help of Rosalie and Edward, she has been able to get around the home. She's the only one who can make them feel better.

"Is he awake?" Rosalie asked Stella who was peaking. The guy was still changing, it was slow but Stella had some assurance that he was changing

"Carlisle's coming." Edward informed. Stella and Rosalie had one look at each other before Stella hugged her for assurance.

"I have to go. I'll see you soon." Stella said, rubbing her back one last time before sneaking out the nearby window

Stella heard Rosalie's call for help to Carlisle before she could fully escape. Stella realized that the newborn vampire was awake. She dashed back into the home, instantly understanding that she was the source of the problem. While Carlisle, Rosalie, and Edward fought to stop him, the man was trying all in his power to get to Stella.

"Stella!" Carlisle called as the three of them were thrown aside by the guy and quickly attacked Stella

He was quicker than Stella so she couldn't run. As a result, she made the decision to protect herself. With a rapid stroke of her fingers, the newborn had red ropes wrapped around his body and legs, tripping him up as he attempted what he could do to get free off the cords.

"I told you not be here!" Carlisle yelled, rushing to be in front of Stella in an attempt to protect her

"Let him free, we'll hunt with him." Edward said

"No!" Rosalie argued immediately "We have to take him out the house first! It's too dangerous for Stella if we free him now."

"Set him free once we step out the house. Then we'll quickly hunt." Carlisle ordered "Rosalie, stay with Stella."

As they walked out the door, Edward and Carlisle assisted the newborn in standing up. Stella swiftly removed the wires she had conjured up on him after the door was shut, and they went off to hunt.

"He's angry at you, isn't he?" Rosalie asked, guilt laced in her tone

"It'll pass." Stella coolly answered

"I'm sorry. You wouldn't do this if you didn't sense that we were anxious for him. Because of that, your life was just placed in danger." Rosalie apologized, sitting on the couch as she waits for the three

"Don't apologize." Stella assured, sitting next to her "I willingly helped you two out. I wouldn't do it if I didn't want to."

"Why'd you think he's mad at you?" Rosalie asked after a long silence between the two

"I don't particularly think that he's mad at me that way. He wouldn't specifically be that vocal if he's mad." Stella frowned "I think he's more hurt than mad."

"Hurt?" Rosalie asked

"It's easier to say why you're mad as to why you're hurt." Stella explained "He'll find it easier to explain that he was mad at me for not listening to him than explaining that he's hurt because of my actions."

"Does he believe that or that's what you've noticed on him?" Rosalie asked

"A bit of both, I guess." Stella shrugged

Edward, Carlisle, and the newborn, who had introduced himself as Emmett, returned from their hunting trip a little time later. Carlisle was the first to enter the home, rushing up to Stella to protect her.

“Hi.” Emmett greeted, waving his hand at the two that he just met

“Hi.” Carlisle said in a rush, before dragging Stella up to their room

“Are they together?” Emmett asked as both Edward and Rosalie shrugged in response

“Why were you there?” Carlisle hissed the moment that the door was shut, separating them from the outside world and leaving them on their own for a while, giving them the illusion of privacy in a house filled with vampires with vampiric senses

“Because they needed me.” Stella hissed back, ready to argue “Edward had no idea how to console others, and Rosie – poor Rosie – had no idea what to anticipate. I couldn’t leave them alone at that moment, you know I can’t.”

“What about me? Who needs you being alive and well just as much as they do? How will you have stayed with me if you – wishing to whatever deity there is that it never happens – didn’t make it out alive tonight?” Carlisle asked in a tone louder than how he usually would when they argued

What he said took Stella by surprise. They've been together for decades, but she was taken aback when he stated flatly that he relies on her for his desire to continue living. She was well aware that she, too, was reliant on him for the desire to continue living, but she would never confess it, particularly to him.

“Say something.” Carlisle said, startling Stella

“Witches are the most powerful supernatural beings that there is. A witch is exceptionally difficult to be killed, especially by vampires. They will only be severely harmed if attacked.” Stella explained to him, ignoring the strong heartbeats in her chest “You came across me when five vampires attempted to group up on me. I know you believe in me and my abilities, so why have you begun to mistrust me?”

“I don’t doubt you and your abilities. I never did.” Carlisle said, sitting down on his bed

“It’s just— you know what, never mind. Just don’t do something like that again.” Carlisle started to continue before changing his mind “Don’t be too reckless. I need you.”

Stella could have sworn with all her might that she felt human again when Carlisle told her that he needed her. The sensation of blood racing up her cheeks, turning them a pale scarlet, the sensation of butterflies in her stomach, and the desire to rush up to him and kiss him. He made her feel human again, a feeling that she missed

Stella realized at that instant that this particular vampire was her true mate. Now she just needed to know if he thought of her the same way.

~1950~

Rosalie, Emmett, Edward, and Carlisle were out hunting for the night and Stella was busy finishing a book when she heard a knock on the door

“Carlisle, you can enter without knocking in your own home!” Stella groaned, bothered that someone disrupted her reading

“I’m not Carlisle.” A sweet woman’s voice said from outside the door. Which confused Stella, they weren’t expecting any guests, especially this late. So, she did what any sane witches would do…

“Who are you and what are your intentions?” She loudly asked, preparing for a battle

“I’m Alice!” Alice sweetly introduced, and Stella was more intrigued than ever, because why is she introducing herself if she has plans to attack?

Stella approached the door, carefully opening it and peering outside to see who was speaking. She noticed two persons, one of them was a small female with pixie-like features and was exceedingly thin. Her glossy black hair was cropped short and pointed in every way. She was accompanied by a tall man with honey blond hair that dropped just below his collar. He is robust but not big in appearance. 

Like the other Cullens, they both has pale, marble-like skin, otherworldly beauty, and bruise-like purple shadows under their eyes. If Stella had not spent multiple decades with the other Cullens, she was certain to have confused them as one as well.

“Stella?” Carlisle asked, seeing the two unknown vampires in their front porch interacting with his confident witch

“Carlisle Cullen!” Alice sweetly said, as if she was excited that she was finally meeting him

“How do you know us?” Carlisle asked, motioning Edward, Rosalie, and Emmett to stay behind as he steps closer

“Oh, we mean no harm!” Alice said in the sweet voice that she had earlier “I can see into the future, and I saw that we were gonna be joining the Cullens. I’m Alice and this is Jasper.”

“She’s not lying.” Edward backed her up “She also knows that we will move back to Forks once every Cullen has full control over their thirst.”

“It’s certain?” Rosalie asked

“The reason is because Forks is Stella’s favorite town.” Edward added, getting Stella to furrow her eyebrows

“Of course.” Emmett teased 

“Who said that Carlisle is the man of the house when Stella is right there? Just one ‘pretty please’ from Carlisle, and suddenly, we’re doing said plead from her.” Emmett continued, getting Rosalie to laugh

“Okay, too much.” Carlisle said, stopping them from saying more about their future “I supposed these two are another addition to our growing family.”

“You’re still very terrible with surprises, you know that?” Stella teased Carlisle

“Oh, you’re in for more surprises though.” Edward said in a teasing tone before walking in the house and leaving them all dumbfounded

“Okay, all of you, to your rooms.” Carlisle said, urging the two “There’s a spare room in the house, but I have a feeling that you know that already?”

“Oh yes.” Alice answered, reaching for Jasper hand and walking into the house. Rosalie and Emmett following next who was side-eyeing each other after hearing what was in their future

“A mind reader, a drop-dead gorgeous woman, someone who could murder me in a flash, a future seer, and someone who might kill me in a flash again are adopted by a doctor and a witch.” Stella listed down, laughing as her and Carlisle entered the house and to their room “When you asked me to join you over a century ago, I didn’t think that it was to build a family.”

“To be fair, I didn’t think that it was gonna end this way too.” Carlisle agreed with her as he rested his arms on her shoulders, pulling her closer to him

[certifiedcallahanstan]

The memoir of a horny fangirl (H.C Series)

Pairing: Hazel Callahan x Fem!reader

College AU

Summary:

After a two years of studying abroad in Australia for marine biology you return back to your college for your senior year, everything is how you remember it..

Josie and Isabel moved in together.

P.J is still horny as ever.

but one thing is different..Hazel is a professional baseball player.

Word count: 3.2k

Warnings: Angst!!, Confident Hazel (bc she’s got as fuck), Fuck boy Hazel but not really, Sometimes insufferable reader, eventual smut

This is a slow burn series, there will smut but not in the first chapter

Chapter 1-

You had been in Australia at a marine biology internship for the the past two years of university. You were excited to see at your friends, really you were but after three cancelled flights, two delays and having to sit next to a fifty something year old man who snores could’ve sent the plane down, you were really excited to just lay in your bed and sleep. Your friends however had other plans.

Isabel, Josie, Stella-Rebecca, Brittany, Hazel and P.J had gotten a extra key to your apartment from your parents (which you didn’t even know they had), and had spent five hours furnishing it with balloons, streamers, printed out pictures of sea animals and a big banner that says “welcome home mate”.

To say you were surprised was an understatement, as soon as your hand twisted the door knob and pushed the door open, cheers erupted from your friends and choruses of “welcome back” and “damn how did you get even hotter” filled the room.

As you take in the scene of your friends' enthusiastic welcome, you can't help but feel overwhelmed with warmth and happiness. Despite the exhaustion from your journey, their energy is infectious. Your heart swells with affection for each of them, especially as Isabel, and soon everyone else tackles you in a hug.

well everyone except P.J that is, she just kind of presses her lips together and tilts her head towards you in acknowledgment, never being one for affection.

After everyone has gotten their hugs in you can’t help but notice one face is notably absent, you scan the room for the shaggy haired brunette but she is nowhere to be seen, stirring a mix of emotions within you.

You try to push aside any feelings of disappointment , focusing instead on the joy of being reunited with your friends after such a long time away.

Everyone settles on the couch, Isabel and Josie cuddled together, they’ve been together close to three years which warmed your heart. Stella-Rebecca gushed about how she got asked to do her first ever run way show, and Brittany had officially signed a deal with a celebrity to help promise her jewelry business. And P.J had finally lost her virginity, which came from a slightly tipsy Stella-Rebecca leading to a slightly more annoyed P.J. You chose to leave it alone.

You’re curled up on the couch listening to all of your friends conversing when you hear your apartment door open.

Your heart skips a beat as you turn to see the familiar figure entering the room. The shaggy-haired brunette, the one you've been eagerly awaiting, finally arrives, and a rush of emotions floods over you (it’s just because you haven’t seen her in a while, you swear).

Despite trying to play it cool, you can't hide the smile that spreads across your face as she joins the group. It's as if the puzzle is finally complete with their presence, and you feel a sense of contentment settle over you.

“Sorry i’m late” she huffs out as she sets her backpack on the table by your door “Practice ran late”

"It's alright, we're just glad you're here," you reply, trying to hide the relief in your voice. You gesture for her to join you on the couch.

She graciously accepts the gesture and sits by you and you can’t help but notice how different she looks. When you left two years ago she was still the shy awkward girl you knew from highschool who wouldn’t stop talking about star wars and bomb making.

As you take in her transformation, you're struck by how stunning she looks. Gone is the shy, awkward girl you once knew, replaced by this confident, stylish version of herself. The way she carries herself, the subtle accessories that accentuate her outfit—all of it adds to her allure.

She still had the same mullet rocker hairstyle but her facial features seem to have gotten sharper and her muscle’s definitely more defined (not that you were looking because you definitely weren’t)

Your heart patters as you hear Brittany gasp and look at you “Did Hazel tell you about making the team?!”

Your eyebrows knit in confusion as you turn and look at hazel “no..what team?”

The brunette rubs her ring adorned hand on the back of her neck “it’s really no big deal-“

“No big deal?!” P.J interrupts smacking her hands on the couch “You got signed with the mother fucking NBA!”

Your eyes widen in shock as the news sinks in. The NBA? you swear you could feel your panties dampen. You knew she liked watching baseball and was pretty good at it, but you’ve never gotten to see her play. The thought of her in a baseball uniform makes you unusually horny.

You quickly snap out of your momentary distraction, realizing everyone is waiting for your response. Blushing slightly, you smile, "That's incredible, Hazel! Congratulations!" Your voice carries genuine excitement and admiration.

Her excitement is contagious, and you find yourself beaming along with her. You offer her a congratulatory hug which she happily obliges to.

As everyone converses and gets slightly more tipsy you and hazel sit by each other conversing and you realize how much you’ve missed this.

“I can’t wait to see you in action Miss NBA all star”

Hazel huffs out a chuckle tracing the rim of her cup and you can’t help but notice how prominent the veins are in her hand.

“I actually have a game this weekend. You should come” she smiles and licks her bottom lip in a way that should be illegal. You sensed a hint of flirtatiousness in her voice but you chalked it down to both of you being a little bit more than tipsy.

“Of course Haze” You smile as you squeeze her free hand “you know i wouldn’t miss it for the world”

“OH MY GOD I FUCKING LOVE THIS SONG” Isabel screeches and she pulls a stunned hazel up and starts screaming the words to “HOT TO GO”

As the night winds down and it's just you and Hazel left as she helps you clean up the mess that has consumed your apartment. The intimate setting allows your feelings for her to surface, even if only in the privacy of your thoughts.

You’ve always kind of had a thing for Hazel, the way she was always so kind to everyone even if they didn’t deserve it. How she could make jokes at the perfect time, and the fucking smile of hers.

You’re consumed in your thoughts as “living on a prayer” softly fills your apartment when you hear Hazel say something.

“Sorry” you say looking up from the trash bag you were tying and looking to her “what was that”

“you’re always in you’re own world aren’t you” she chuckles which causes the apples of your cheeks to turn pink “I said it’s good to see you again, it hasn’t been the same without you”

“Yeah, it's good to see you too," you reply, trying to keep your voice steady despite the flutter in your chest. "I've missed our late-night clean-up sessions."

And it’s true, Hazel was always the one to stay after and help you clean up after any kind of event.

An hour later everything is in its place and As Hazel gets ready to leave, you feel a pang of reluctance, not wanting the night to end just yet. "Hey, Hazel," you say, your voice a little softer than before, "thanks for helping out tonight, and for everything, really." You offer her a genuine smile

Hazel returns your smile, her gaze lingering for a moment longer than usual. "Anytime," she replies, her tone equally sincere. "And hey, don't forget about the game this weekend. I'll save you a seat." With a playful wink, she heads towards the door.

You watch her go, feeling a mixture of emotions swirling within you. As the door clicks shut behind her, you're left alone with your thoughts once more, the echoes of the night's events lingering in the air.

————————————

You didn’t see Hazel for the rest of the week, which left you restless and longing for her presence. Each day passed with a sense of anticipation for her baseball game on Saturday.

As the days went by, you couldn't shake the feeling of unease that settled in the pit of your stomach. You missed her more than you cared to admit.

As Saturday rolled around, you sat with them at Josie's house, Isabel was standing in a pile of clothes, determined to find you, quote on quote “the most pussy dripping outfit” and after what seems like an eternity she throws a tank top and short blue denim shorts to you and smiles.

You pick up the articles of clothing and laugh slightly. As you slip into the tank top and shorts, you can't help but feel a surge of confidence wash over you. Sure, the outfit may be on the more revealing side for a baseball game, but you can't deny that you look good in it. With a playful smile, you give Isabel a nod of approval and Josie whistles.

“Hazel isn’t going to be able to focus on the game seeing you” she says “and i mean this in the least offensive most feminist way, your tits look amazing” she huffs out as she gives you the “ok” hand symbol

"Thanks, Josie," you reply with a grin, feeling a warmth spread through you at her words.

With a final adjustment to your outfit, you three head to the stadium and Isabel grabs your hand and drags you to the VIP seating, As you approach the group, you're greeted by Annie, Sylvie, P.J, and Brittany, who are deep in conversation.

“I’m just saying” Sylvie huffs out in between handfuls of popcorn “If god didn’t make weed for people to smoke, what did he make it for“

“Not for you to get high off of and run into a rive butt ass naked!” Annie screeches

"Hey, everyone," you greet the group with a smile. "What's all this about running into rivers naked?" You raise an eyebrow, feigning curiosity as you take a seat among them.

Annie chuckles, shaking her head. "Long story," she replies, shooting a playful glare at Sylvie. "Let's just say Sylvie here had a little too much fun with nature last summer."

Sylvie shrugs, grinning sheepishly. "Hey, it was a dare," she defends herself, reaching for another handful of popcorn.

Soon enough the players start to take their positions on the field, your heart skips a beat when you spot Hazel on the pitcher's mound. The sight of her, with black eye paint under her eyes, which is enough to make you come undone on the spot.

With bated breath, you watch as she lifts her leg up and delivers the first pitch, her focus and determination evident with each movement. As the game progresses, you find yourself cheering louder and more enthusiastically with each play, feeling a sense of pride swell within you with every pitch she throws.

You can feel the anticipation in the air as the score remains neck and neck. Then, in the final moments, Hazel winds up and delivers the winning pitch, sending the ball soaring with precision and determination.

A collective roar erupts from the crowd as the ball connects with the catcher's mitt, signaling victory for Hazel's team. Cheers and applause fill the stadium as fans jump to their feet.

Josie pumps her fist in the air, her infectious energy spreading to the rest of the group.

And for the first time you realize how many girls are wearing Callahan jerseys and you hear a couple screaming “marry me” and “fuck me hazel”, even seeing a few flashing her and you can’t help but feel a pant of jealousy.

Despite knowing that Hazel is just basking in the admiration of her fans, seeing others openly express their attraction to her stirs up feelings of insecurity within you. You hadn’t realized how popular Hazel was until now.

—————————————

Josie declared an obligatory house party after the game, so soon enough her house was filled with drunk college students.

Music thumped through the speakers, laughter echoed in every corner, and the scent of alcohol lingered in the air. You search for Hazel, not being able to have seen her after the game due to the numerous interviewers surrounding her.

You spot her surrounded by girls hanging off of her. You meet her gaze and you can’t help but notice how her eyes travel to your cleavage and the smirk that adorns her face before she turns her attention back to the girls. Isabel comes up to you and bumps your shoulder “fun day huh?”

You tear your eyes away from Hazel and smile “Yeah it was the best, i didn’t realize haze was so popular though, i mean i swear i saw a girl faint when she came out”

Isabel laughs as she grabs another cup from the kitchen counter “Yeah Hazel is like..the gay awakening for every girl across America”

You hum in acknowledgment as you turn your focus back to where Hazel is..or was, and you notice she is walking towards you.

As Hazel makes her way toward you, your heart skips a beat, feeling a mix of excitement and nervousness. You can't help but notice the way her eyes linger on you for a moment before she joins you, the smirk on her lips not escaping your notice.

She’s dressed in a black tank top and blue washed jeans with a silver chain glistening around her neck and you can’t help but wonder what it would look like with her head between your thighs.

"Hey," she says, pulling out of your frankly embarrassing day dream, her voice warm as she approaches. "Sorry about the crowd back there. It's been a bit hectic with all the interviews and fans."

You smile, trying to hide the flutter in your chest as you meet her gaze. "No worries," you reply, mustering up a casual tone. "Looks like you've got quite the fan club."

She shrugs as she messes with the red cup in her hand, her eyes scanning your outfit, still the same one that you had worn to the baseball game.

"You look great," she says, her voice genuine as she meets your gaze, you chew on your bottom lip as she whispers in your ear, “how did you know my favorite color was red”

a shiver runs down your spine at the proximity of her breath. Her words catch you off guard, and you can feel your cheeks flush with warmth. You spot Josie with her eyebrows raised and a shit eating grin on her face.

"I, uh, didn't know," you admit, feeling a flutter of excitement at her whispered confession. "I just... wore what I had."

Hazel's lips curl into a playful smirk as she leans back, her gaze locking with yours. "Well, it suits you," she says, her voice low and teasing. "Red looks good on you."

Since when did Hazel get so fucking good at flirting? You shift your standing position, pressing your thighs together as arousal sweeps over you.

“Hazel!” a drunk P.J calls out as soon as you were about to respond “Do shots with me”

Hazel hesitates before muttering “duty awaits” and giving you a two finger salute and she makes her way to the drunk blonde

"Sure, duty calls," you reply with a forced smile, trying to push aside the twinge of longing that tugs at your chest. With a final glance in Hazel's direction, you watch as she makes her way over to P.J, the momentary connection between you fading into the background as the party continues to unfold.

You find yourself leaning against the wall in a secluded hallway, not because you don’t like the party but because Sylvie keeps trying to challenge you in a game of “who can eat the most edibles”

Footsteps pat against the floors and you let your gaze look to see who was coming to disturb your peace only to find out it was a smiling Hazel.

“Trying to hide from me already?” she chuckles out as she stands infront of you and you can smell her cologne from here.

“Oh yeah” " you reply with a playful smirk, leaning back against the wall. "But I guess you found me."

Hazel chuckles, her eyes sparkling with amusement as she leans in closer, her cologne enveloping you in its intoxicating scent.

“I feel like i’ve barely had any time to talk to you” your words slightly slurred from the alcohol as you look at her.

a frown takes over her face as she tilts her head "Yeah, it's been pretty hectic," she admits, her voice tinged with regret.

You can’t help but notice how good she looks right now with her hair messy and the slight shine from sweat.

Now you wouldn’t call yourself a particularly bold person, but you’re also three vodka cranberries and four shots deep so logic isn’t really on your side right now.

you press your arms closer to your body making your cleavage your prominent as you push your lips out into a fake pout “maybe you can make it up to me”

Hazels eyebrows furrow as she brushes some hair from your face “What do you need?”

There’s her sweet oblivious Hazel, it’s comforting to know she hadn’t totally changed.

You’re about to respond when you feel acid in your throat. With a panicked gasp, you shove Hazel out of the way and rush to the bathroom, your hand clamped over your mouth as you desperately try to contain the rising bile.

As you reach the toilet, your stomach lurches, and you double over, emptying its contents into the bowl Through the haze of nausea, you vaguely register P.J’s concerned voice, asking if you're okay.

Obviously fucking not.

As the worst of the nausea passes, you lean back against the bathroom wall, feeling drained and shaky. Isabel grabs all of your belongings and drags you up from the floor as she takes you home.

——————————————

As you’re curled up in bed about to drift off to sleep your phone pings and you groan.

You swear to god if it’s Annie sending another fucking puking gif you will take her church shoe and shove it so far up her ass.

As you flip your phone over you see that instead of a lewd gif, it’s a message from Hazel.

“I hope you’re doing okay, i’ll bring over some soup tomorrow :)”

You can’t help the smile that spread across your face as you drift off into a peaceful sleep.

Until you got another ping.

This time it was from an unknown number which was odd because you swore you’ve blocked all the scammers.

In the message is a singular photo. a photo containing a petite red head pressed up against hazel, and as she zooms in she realizes their lips are interlocked.

stupid fucking stupid is the only thing you could think of.

With a heavy sigh, you block the number before sending hazel a message and tossing your phone across the room, burying your face in your pillow falling asleep with a tear streaked face.

“don’t bother. i’m fine.”

[urmultideadfandomperson]

How would the Arcana Twilight boys would react if the MC is an actual polar bear. Or turned into a polar bear? 🐻‍❄️

MC Turns into a Polar Bear

Character/s: Summoner (MC), Arcturus, Spica, Pollux, Alpheratz, Sirius, Vega

Genre/s: Fluff, Cracks

Warning/s: None

Summary: There was a failed experiment with a certain potion, resulting MC turning into a polar bear! What will the Guides do?

Requested by: Anonymous

Note: Thank you for the first ask, anon! I apologize if this was released very long. My schedule this April is particularly busy, and I cannot focus on every task at once. MC being a literal polar bear has already been done by @pomegranateboba. Thank you for being patient, though! May you enjoy your read!

Arcturus

This sorcerer was very surprised in seeing you in such a form.

"Summoner? Is that you??"

No wonder you did not answer his calls on your Stella Tab!

He was about to attack you earlier with his wand when he saw the necklace on your furry neck, and then he realizes that it was you.

Arcturus knows the potion's effect is temporary, so he was kind enough to help you in Contell while being a polar bear.

You cannot speak at anybody, you can only roar in response. Somehow Arcky understands you and was able to translate your roars as words.

Arcturus has knowledge about animals. When he remembered that polar bears usually survive in the cold, he did not hesitate in taking you to a cold room.

When you poofed back, he was both happy and disappointed because (1) the effects finally wore off! But (2), the softness of your fur is gone :(

Either way, he's just happy you're back <3

Spica

He was both surprised and disappointed, maybe even slightly amused.

"Summoner, what... *sighs* what happened? And what did you do?"

Spica was still sane enough to handle this mess.

Though he thought he was dumb for asking you questions when you can only reply with roars.

He helped you throughout the school period in Contell, helping you adjust to your temporary form.

Spica was rather relieved that nobody minded too much about you being a polar bear.

But some students did scream.

And he had a headache trying to calm the students. You had to help him calm down by letting him rest on your fur.

So when you poofed back, the sorcerer was quick to ask if you were alright. After that, he served you some tea.

Pollux

One of the students who screamed.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAA IT'S A BEAR— W-Wait, Summoner?!!"

Pollux was quick to ask you what happened, but just like Spica, he felt stupid because your only replies were roars.

Either way, he was more than happy to help you throughout class!

When partnered for projects, the sorcerer was more than happy to help you. He wished to do the work, but if you insist in helping him, why not?

He kept flexing you to everyone, saying that he befriended a polar bear

One of the sorcerers who just love to groom your fur! His fingers running through your fur is very ticklish.

When you poof back, he is similar to Arcturus who will pout because you're no longer a bear.

But hey! Pollux is still thankful that you turned back. He wouldn't admit it, but he would panic if the effect was permanent.

Alpheratz

Oh. My. Goodness.

"Bless the stars, Summoner. You turned into a bear... can I sleep on you?"

This man is living the life of having a pillow, even for just a short amount of time.

But that doesn't mean he will not help you. Honestly, it's more of an excuse for him to stay with you longer. But don't take this the wrong way!

Alpheratz is a genius, thus he'd definitely understand your roars. He is the second polar bear translator in Contell.

He knows that polar bears survive in the cold, and what he did was take you to a clearing that was very cool because of the trees giving oxygen. Then he snuggled you to sleep there.

And not gonna lie, it actually felt good just sleeping like this with him.

You swore you almost heard Alpheratz groan in disappointment when you poofed back.

But eventually, he was glad you're back. You're still napping with him in that clearing, though.

Sirius

For some reason, he knew before he even saw you.

"A failed experiment with the potions, I see? Summoner, you could've been careful and you wouldn't end up this way,"

He likes to tease you, but not too much that will make you uncomfortable.

Sirius is actually pretty helpful while you stay in that form. He has a bit of difficulties trying to translate your roars, but it ends well.

This man will definitely just say to everybody of how you ended up like this. The fact he says it so casually wants you to punch him.

This menace is the opposite of Pollux. If the latter will groom your fur, this guy right here will mess with it, leaving you with messy fur.

Now you look like a bear who went through a hurricane.

When you poofed back, Sirius was actually surprised when you roared like a bear at his face for the excessive teasing.

After that, he laughs and continues to mess with you. You cannot escape this maniac because you love him.

Vega

As soon as he saw you, Vega took out his sword and points it at you.

"How did a bear get here in Contell?... wait, Summoner, is that you?"

Once he realizes, he draws back his weapon and apologizes for frightening you like that.

To make it up for you, Vega helps you around Contell and the classes.

When another sorcerer teases you (mainly Sirius), he will not hesitate to draw his sword to them as a warning.

While helping you, he likes to touch your fur with his hands. Heck, the sorcerer is so tempted, he actually took off his gloves just to feel you.

Vega is aware that it is rather hazardous for you, but he likes feeds you with his raspberry gelato.

When you poofed back, he asks if you have any discomforts from the effect of the failed potion. He sighs in relief when you reassure him you are okay.

Regardless of your form, whether you're a human or a polar bear, Vega will always see you as his best friend.

[i-spaced-sorry]

Hi

I just wanted to tell you that I love your writing so much!!!!

Also I was wondering if you could please write a Jay Helstead x little sister reader??

Like maybe Jay has had custody of her since she was a baby and now she starts asking questions about their parents. Like why it has only ever been Jay taking care of her and where is her mom? Maybe the reader is like 6, just started kindergarten and maybe this is what stems the question asking (other kids talking about their own parents and asking why the reader only ever talks about Jay)

Thank you for all that you do

this is 100% your choice and feel free to make any changes

Hi! Thanks for requesting! I hope you like it, it kind of went dark! I'm also enjoying playing around with writing time skips, so I hope you enjoy that (if not, sorry)

TW: mention of past abuse, mention of death during childbirth

Title: Why?

“Why” you asked while you sat down to eat your cereal.

Almost dropping the coffee pot, you watched as your brother Jay placed it back on the machine and sighed, “I thought we left this stage when you were 3”

“No, why” you tried again, beginning to whine when your brother didn’t understand your vague question. 

Sitting across from you at the table, Jay placed his coffee down and asked, “why, what? I need more than just a word.”

You chewed your cereal bite and swallowed before you wiped your mouth with the back of your hand. 

“Why is it just you and me and occasionally Will? What happened to mommy and daddy?”

Jay knew this day was coming. Though he was hoping it wouldn’t happen until you were at least out of elementary school. But he should have known better, 6yr olds are relentless if he remembered his time in school correctly. 

“Uh, just because it was easier this way. Can I ask where this is coming from?”

***

“And where did she say it was coming from?” asked Hailey, while the two of them sat in the surveillance van watching the corner store for their suspect. 

Continuing the look through the binoculars, Jay responded, “some of her friends were talking about how they were excited for some donuts and dads party their class is having in a few weeks.” 

“Okay, follow up question, what did you tell her when she asked?” asked Hailey, putting a pin in the stupid class party that definitely is leaving kids who don’t have dads out. 

Turning to face his partner, he wiped his hand down his face and sighed, “I panicked and told her it was easier this way.”

“Jay. You didn’t answer her question at all.”

“I know, but what was I supposed to say? Hey Y/N, you live with me because mom died during childbirth and dad went off the rails and abused you mentally for the first 3 yrs of your life and it wasn’t until I came home from the War that I realized how bad it had got and now dad is in jail and you have a restraining order against him where if he comes within 50 ft of you, I’m allowed to tackle him and call the police on him? Yea, I’ll pass”

Laughing slightly at her partner's bluntness, Hailey replied, “I’m not saying say all that to your 6yr old sister. But I do think she deserves some explanation”

When she notices her partner opening his mouth to protest, she adds, 

“Age appropriate Jay. Age appropriate.”

**

You were sitting at the kitchen table coloring, while your babysitter for the evening, Stella, was putting together your after school snack. 

“Okay munchkin, here is your snack” she said as she placed your apple slices and peanut butter beside you. Seeing your paper she asked curiously, “what ya coloring there?”

Not looking up you replied, “a picture duh” 

“Okay sassy pants” was all Stella replied before walking away trying to process what you drew. 

When Jay got home, he thanked Stella and walked her to the door. 

“Thanks again, Eva was stuck studying for her final exams and I didn’t want her to be torn away every few minutes to deal with the monkey”

While shrugging on her coat, Stella smiled, “it’s no problem. I like hanging out with Y/N. Though, I don’t know what’s going on with her, but she was drawing some interesting pictures this afternoon”

That caught Jay’s attention, “interesting how?” he probed. 

“Nothing bad, just she was drawing a shadowy figure outside the house, you, Will, and her were inside, but she was crying in her drawing.”

Sighing, Jay replied, “thanks”

And with that Stella left and he shut the door behind her and turned around. 

“Now or never” he muttered. 

Walking over to where you were eating dinner, Jay sat down. 

“Do you want to hear about why it’s just you and me and occasionally Will?”

You looked up from your spaghetti, “Yes!” you just about screamed while nodding your head insistently. 

“Okay, so when you were being born, mommy was not very well. The doctors had to make a decision. And I want you to know the decision that was made is not and will never be your fault.”

You felt tears prick your eyes, “mommy died?” 

Jay felt his own eyes prick, “Yes, but I will tell you as many stories about her. Whenever you want. And I bet you, Will, will too , if you ask him nicely.” 

You stared for a few moments taking everything in. “Okay, so that explains mommy. What about daddy?”

Jay didn’t really know how to appropriately tell you that your dad had abused you, so he went with a toddler age appropriate response and hoped you wouldn’t probe for more. 

“So, when mommy died, I went away right”

“To fight a war!” you inserted!

Nodding, Jay kept going, “yes, to fight a war. So it was just you and dad. But dad was really sad about mom and he did some bad things. Will and I didn’t know what these bad things entailed until I came home and Will came back from school for the summer.”

“Bad things?” you inquired. 

Mentally screaming fuck, Jay calmly replied, “he was hurting and took it out on others and was just not being a good dad. So he had to go away for a long time.”

“But why you? Why not Will or grandma or grandpa?” you probed. 

“Will was still in school and wasn’t in a good spot to care for himself, go to school, and care for you. Grandma and Grandpa both have their own slew of health issues and we thought it would be better if they didn’t have to restart the parenting process. I had come home from the war for good by that time and it was decided I had the most stable housing and money coming in. So that’s how it was decided it would be me, you, and occasionally Will.”

You thought for a few minutes, taking in everything you just learned. When you finally slipped out of your chair, came around the table and hugged your brother exclaiming, “thank you” over and over again.

[keep-the-wolves-close]

Steady Heart

Chapter 21: Shameless

* Pairing: Slow-burn Kayce Dutton x OFC Stella Daniels

* Rating: M

* Warnings: NSWF, language, smut, sex, p in v penetration, no condom, biting

* Word count: 3,350ish

I would love to give credits to @dameronscopilot and @deanscroissant for being sounding boards for me during this whole process, giving outsider insight, being cheerleaders, and allowing me to screech at them about things that have happened during the writing process. I seriously couldn't have gotten this far without y'all!

Special mention: @deanscroissant & @lexixstewart and the couple friends who don’t have tumblr so I can’t tag them, for giving me their honest opinions on the smut because, y’all I blacked out 💀💀😂

Author's note: Oh shit y’all! We’re here! 👀 I hope everyone is enjoying so far! I hope you love this chapter as well! Pretend in the gif that’s Stella and they’re inside and not in the forest 😅😂. Also please be gentle. This is my first attempt at writing smut and being serious with myself 😂

I’m posting this a day early because I’m nervous and ripping the bandaid off lmao. Also sinful things on a Sunday are a hilarious juxtaposition to me lmao. So feel free to comment or hit my ask box and flail with me lol. Just please be kind. 🤓💛

Stella rutched around in the waiting room chair. Her phone went off with a text from Ryan. Any update on Mr. Dutton?

She and Kayce had been here for quite a few hours. His dad was out of surgery and resting. John's current nurse just told Kayce he was allowed to go back and talk to him for a few minutes. She replied quickly. Out of surgery. Finally able to go talk to him. BRB.

She reached out for Kayce’s hand. “Do you want me to go with you?”

Kayce contemplated. “Sure.” He squeezed her hand and guided her along through the big double doors to the room he was told. When they got to the door, he paused.

Stella turned and checked him out. He hesitated to go in. “Hey,” she reached out for Kayce and pulled him into a hug. He wrapped his arms around her. “Everything is gonna be okay.” He hid his face in her neck. She gently rubbed his back. She whispered to him. “We’ll go in when you’re ready.”

He let out a hard sigh. “Let’s go.”

The pair walked through the door. They peeked around to the right at John's bed. He looked like he was fast asleep. Stella directed Kayce to the chair next to the bed.

The legs of the chair made a dragging noise and that seemed to perk Kayce’s dad up. “Who the hell is trying to bother me now?” He grumbled.

The friends shared a chuckle. Kayce reached out for his dad’s hand. “It’s just me and Stella, dad.”

“Hey, John.” She announced her presence since his eyes were still partly closed.

“So when did they say I could leave?” John started messing around with his blankets.

Kayce jumped to his feet to try and stop John from getting up. Stella rounded the bed to help on the other side. Kayce instructed his dad. “Woah woah woah. You ain’t leavin’ tonight, that’s for sure.” John still must have been under the effects of whatever medicines they had him on because he stopped fighting against them easily. Kayce smiled at his dad. “We’ll discuss all of that in the morning.”

“Are you going back home?”

“I can stay if you want.”

John looked up at Stella. It shook her, seeing him vulnerable. A memory of her dad floated through. “Stella get him home. I don’t need a babysitter.”

Stella laughed through her nose. “I’ll do my best, sir.” Someone knocked on the door behind them.

“Excuse me guys. Visiting hours are over. The nurses need in here to prepare him for the night.”

Stella approached the nurse. “Can we give them like five more minutes? Then I promise I’ll get us out of your hair.”

The nurse sighed. “Okay, sure. But only five more minutes and I’ll be back.”

“Thank you!” Stella moved to Kayce who was still standing at his father’s bed. “Hey I got you five more minutes. I’ll be right outside the door, okay?” She looked at John. “And you, sir, get to feelin’ better.” There was a gruff chuckle in response. Kayce grabbed her hand before she could leave. The two locked eyes, but didn’t say anything. Stella smiled and Kayce slowly let her hand go to continue talking to his dad.

She walked out of the door and leaned against the wall to wait for Kayce. She had to figure out how to convince the youngest Dutton to leave the hospital for the night. Looking around, she remembered how much she hated being in a hospital. Memories of before she and Ryan ran away came back. All the hospital visits for not only their own injuries, but when their dad got sick. When John had looked up at her from the bed, it was like she saw her dad all over again. She shook her head to clear the thoughts.

Thinking of Ryan, she messaged him back. He’s alright. In as rare a form as ever. I’m gonna take Kayce back to my house, if I can convince him, so he can actually sleep. You need anything?

The team of nurses came around the corner, ready to settle John in for the night. Stella reached behind her and knocked on the door to let Kayce know his time was almost up for the evening. Thankfully he came to the door, smiled politely at the nurses, and grabbed Stella’s hand.

Back out in the waiting room, Kayce sat again with Stella next to him. He still hadn’t let go of her hand. Anyone could see that he was an anxious ball of nerves. Stella rubbed her thumb across his hand. “Kayce?” He looked at her. “Let’s go back to my house.” She said softly.

“Stella, I don't know if I should leave.”

She fixed her glasses with her opposite hand. “I understand your fear of leaving him here. But he’s in the safest place he can be, with the best help in the state. They have your number. They’ll call if they need anything. There’s nothing we can do right now anyway.” She gave his hand a squeeze. “He doesn’t seem like he’s gonna be too much trouble tonight. You need to rest and I guarantee you aren’t gonna do that here.”

She pleaded to him. “My house is closer than the ranch. I’ll even let you use the bed tonight.”

“Okay, but —,” Kayce started saying, but Stella butted in.

“But if they call we’ll leave at the drop of a hat. I’ll also bring you back here bright and early too.” They started to stand.

“Wait, who said you’re driving?”

“I did.” She giggled. “I also still have the keys.” Stella jangled them at him. He tried to swipe them and Stella ran through the main hospital door. He watched her as she dashed for the truck. Kayce laughed to himself because they both knew he’d let her drive.

Ryan answered as Stella clicked her seat belt into place in the truck. Nah, I’m good. You be safe and take care of Kayce.

Stella joked walking into her house. “Man, I feel like this is déjà vu.”

“Stella, it was yesterday.”

She let out a laugh. “Can’t have any fun with you, can I?”

“Now you know that’s a bold faced lie.” Kayce took off his boots and placed his hat on the table.

They both just stood there. Not really sure what step was next. Stella motioned up the stairs. “Well, I guess we should get some shut eye, right?”

“Is this the first time we’re meeting or something?” Kayce smirked.

“Shut up, you doofus.” Stella laughed as the awkwardness dissolved. “C’mon.” She climbed the stairs.

However, once in her room, the bashfulness returned for Stella. Yeah they used to sleep together wherever they fell when they were younger, but being in the same bedroom as Kayce felt different. Now that she thought about it, being in a bedroom with Kayce always felt intimidating in a way.

Stella cleared her throat and offered. “Do you want the same clothes from the last night? I’m sure I’ve got some different ones?” She preoccupied herself picking things up around her room. It wasn’t messy, but there were some articles of clothing she didn’t want him to catch sight of, especially if she could nab them up before she turned the light on. Her cheeks flushed. ‘You really gotta start making sure you utilise the hamper.’

“Nah, the ones from the yesterday will be fine.”

“Okay I’ll go grab them for you.” She stopped herself so quickly she almost tripped. “Wait, where did you leave them?”

“Uhhh…,” Kayce tried to remember where he changed before they left. “I actually think I came up here to the bathroom.”

“Oh! I’ll be right back then. I just put the bedding on like, three days ago. So I can change it if you want, but it should be fine. I only slept on it once. I’ll take the couch tonight.” Stella babbled nervously.

Waltzing out of her bedroom she wanted to hit her own forehead. ‘You're literally acting like you’ve never spoken to him a day in your life. Stop being weird.’ She fixed her glasses and found the clothes where Kayce left them. They were neatly placed on the bathroom counter. She smiled at his manners slipping through. She grabbed them and walked back to her room to give them to Kayce.

“Thank you for —,” she stopped herself when she noticed he wasn’t in the middle of the room anymore where the light from the open door reached. Without a light on in the room, an oversight on her part, she couldn’t see shit. “Kayce?” The lamp on her bedside table painted the room with light.

“Damn!” Stella squinted. “Could’ve given a girl some warning.”

“I’m sorry, didn’t mean to blind ya.”

Stella giggled. “It’s okay.” Her eyes focused on him. It was very apparent to Stella that Kayce had something on his mind. He was holding himself back from saying it. In a delicate tone she asked, “penny for your thoughts?”

He eyed Stella up and decided to take the leap. “Would it really bother you if they talked?”

Her head cocked to the side. “Do you mean about us?” Kayce nodded.

She stayed silent for a few seconds. Apparently her reaction to the potential of being caught crossing a line in their friendship still weighed on him. She assumed his thoughts on the matter were the same. To find out they weren’t and he wanted to push that boundary, floored her. Slowly, but surely, she shook her head. “No. They’ve always talked about us, you know that. So regardless of what we do or don’t do, they’re gonna talk. Whether it’s us, or someone else; their jaws are gonna be flappin’ like old ladies on a Sunday in a salon.” The only person she knew she would catch serious flak from would be her brother or Rip. “So no. I don’t care.”

Kayce’s shoulders dropped. Whether it was relief or not, Stella didn’t know. Kayce nodded quickly. He didn’t give her time to figure it out.

He uttered a gravelly, “good,” before he stepped across the room in three long strides to her. He grabbed her face and they collided. Stella unceremoniously dropped the clothes she still had in her hand. She trailed her hands to his sides and pulled him closer while she scrunched his shirt in her hands.

“Fuck, Kayce. What’re we doing?” Stella mumbled against his mouth. Her mind felt like a dense fog had draped over it.

“Are you okay with it?” He brought his head back slightly and touched his forehead to hers. Nervous he’d gone too far.

She said breathlessly, shaking her head forcefully. “Yeah.” Kayce moved his arms to give her more space. Stella leaned into him and wound her fingers in his hair. She brought his face back to hers.

Kayce trailed his hands down her sides. Past her sore side, her hips, and wrapped them around the backs of her thighs. He squeezed and pulled her up. She let out a gasp and she circled her legs around his waist. He braced her and walked to her bed. She tossed her glasses off to the side. ‘I’ll find them in the morning.’

Gently he laid her down, her legs still around him. Looking up at him through half lidded eyes, she smiled and brushed some hair out of his face. Stella was taken back by how Kayce was looking at her with wonder. If she wasn’t already breathless she would have the wind knocked out of her. It was like he was seeing her with new eyes.

He was enamored by her at that moment. Her hair started to come loose and her lips were swollen from all the attention. The way she smiled up at him made him dive back in. “God,” he breathed.

The scratchy feeling of his facial hair gave her arms goosebumps as he chose a spot on her collarbone to pay attention to. Her eyes fell shut. Kayce moved back causing her legs to fall apart and grabbed the hem of her shirt. He gave it a pull upward. He remembered what happened the last time he gave too much exploration to the visible part of her neck, so he would go lower. Slowly the bruise on her side from the bull came into view. He placed several featherlight kisses along it. “No more cowboy poker. Ya hear me?” He examined the large doe and flowers tattoo that was partially covered in a bruise on her side that matched his buck and gave it a kiss.

“Who’s gonna stop me?” She asked playfully while removing her shirt the rest of the way.

Kayce pulled her down to be eye level. “I will.”

“Are you threatening me, Kayce Dutton?” She laughed.

“No, it's a promise.”

Her eyebrows popped up. “Oh really?”

Kayce placed a soft kiss on the left side of her chest and the scar that resided there. “Really.”

The kiss to the sensitive skin made Stella’s eyes flutter closed. He nipped at her collar bone above the scar. Stella let out a sigh. He worked his way down to the top of her pants. He tapped her stomach to gain her focus. When Stella’s heavy lidded eyes met his, there was a silent question of whether she wanted to keep going because there wouldn’t be much turning back they could do after this.

Stella nodded, but knew he needed to hear it. “Yes Kayce.” He smiled up at her and it took her breath away. He worked the belt loose and the button, and gave Stella room to shimmy her pants down far enough that he could yank them farther down. When they got far enough, she kicked them the rest of the way off, underwear included.

Kayce climbed fully on the bed on top of her. She took a moment to appreciate feeling small and safe. Reaching down she grabbed the bottom of his shirt. She pulled it and frowned. “Off please, too many clothes,” she mumbled.

He sat up straight and yanked his shirt off. When he leaned back down Stella grabbed at his torso, wanting to feel his skin beneath her fingers. He wasn’t cut like most people expected cowboys to be. He had a nice layer that made him soft. Stella dug her fingers into his hips at the top of his waistband.

He quickly stood back off the bed. Stella thought she had done something wrong, but realized it was the exact opposite. Kayce desperately made quick work of his jeans and boxer briefs. She scrambled to sit up and took off the black lace bralette that remained of her clothes. She barely had time to register that he sprang free from the hold his boxer briefs had on him before he was crawling back to her. It was apparently now or never.

Her heart pounded in her chest as he trapped her under his body weight. She could feel his hand drift down between them. He stopped at her breasts to give her nipples a quick pinch, which brought out a breathless moan of his name from Stella. His rough fingertips deftly drifted lower to her entrance. They dipped in between her folds collecting the slick that had built up and spread it up to her clit. He gave a few slow circles around it coaxing a moan from Stella. He grabbed his throbbing cock and pumped a few times. He slid himself through her slick and let himself drive home slowly until he felt the resistance of her cervix.

They both moaned, almost in relief, as he slid home. It had been a while since Stella had been with anyone. It was tight on the way in, and that made her feel all the more full. She placed her feet flat on the bed and squeezed his hips with her bent knees. When she did his hips thrusted ever so slightly and made her completely lose all sense and inhibition. She draped her arms around the back of his neck and found his lips and kissed him greedily. “Fuck, Kayce. Please move.”

He dragged his cock out slow, savoring the feeling of her, and then pumped it back in, hitting her cervix every time. Small moans puffed out of Stella’s mouth each time he connected and she bounced. He hit her back wall hard, but at the same angle every time. “Jesus fuck, oh my god.” Her eyes rolled back and shut. She couldn’t believe this was happening. Kayce gave her a quick and hard two taps, ripping her out of her head with a moan. It was almost like he knew.

He locked eyes with her, despite the closeness, and guided her. “Stay with me baby.” If Stella was able to form a cognitive thought, she would have been drooling. He slipped his arm behind her back and scooted her up farther on her bed so she could lay her head on her pillows. He sat up, bracing her legs on his thighs and placed his hands behind her knees. He continued the rhythm but picked up the pace. He bent toward her, bringing her knees with him.

She gasped at the new angle. “Oh shit.” Her hands reached up to grab any part of him she could. She tried to get to his hips to convince him to move faster. “Faster Kayce. Please.”

His hips slammed at a new pace and Stella swore she saw the universe. Small moans of, ‘oh fuck, oh god, oh fuck, oh fuck,’ slipped out of her as her eyes rolled back again. Kayce put her calves on his shoulders and leaned down to kiss her. Stella thought for certain she would combust at how deep she could feel him.

In this position, with every thrust that he gave her he could feel her cunt squeeze him back, almost pleading with him to stay. “Shit Stella,” he whispered against her mouth. “You like that huh?”

“Oh fuck yes.” Stella breathed out. “I’m close Kayce, keep going,” she panted, pleading, “don’t stop.” Kayce was more than happy to oblige and kicked it up a notch. He panted as his hips snapped against hers. Stella grappled to get any sort of leverage as he manhandled her while he focused on chasing that delicious high. He bit roughly at the base of her neck where it connected to her shoulder and a delighted moan released from both of them.

A few more sharp thrusts and both of them shattered. Stella saw stars erupt behind her eyes and she forced them back open to see Kayce. The look on his face was absolute bliss and she felt a swell in her chest. Both of them moaned each other's names, caught on the high tide. They grabbed at each other trying to tether themselves back in reality.

Stella dropped her legs from his shoulders feeling herself twitch every so often. Kayce remained on top of her trying to catch his breath. She wrapped her arms around him and kissed the side of his head.

They laid there, still entangled in each other. Kayce laid on her chest, her hand running through his hair. She felt peace. Stella let out a big yawn.

Kayce encircled her and moved them so they were laying next to each other. Her head and hand were placed on his chest. She remained quiet. Trying to figure out just what the hell had gotten into her. Into both of them, really. There were no complaints from her, but the whiplash was real.

Stella softly tapped his chest. “We should get some sleep.” She said slowly. To Kayce it sounded like she was half asleep already. “We gotta be up early.” Kayce remained quiet. Tilting her head, she glanced up at him.

“You know you don’t have to use the couch anymore, right?” He smirked at her.

He felt her nod. “I know, but I wanna give you your space.”

Kayce pulled a face. “You’re worried about space? I was just inside you. Space went out the window then.” He laughed.

“Okay okay, fine,” she laughed along with him. “You just don’t wanna sleep alone, do you?”

“Maybe.”

“Okay. I’ll stay.” Stella moved her head to get comfortable again. “Can you turn out the light?”

[stellar-solar-flare]

okay one more thing i cant wait to see it on tumblr ITS SO FUCKING SWEET like everyone needs to see it and reach that ending i literally said those four words out loud after finishing the epilogue

Thank you for the kind words! I'm very flattered that you think everyone should see The Great Christmas Debacle (AO3). And I'm so glad you liked the ending - I wanted to give that story a full-on sugary happily ever after that fit the whole holiday trope extravaganza.

As for posting on tumblr: at least for now, my older long longfics will live only on AO3 because that's more logistically manageable for me, and it makes it easier for me to focus on the stories I'm yet to tell without being overwhelmed. That may change at some point, but right now I don't have plans to repost my entire AO3 archive over here, since my works on AO3 are open for guests. Right now my available time for all fandom stuff is limited, and I'm prioritizing writing my WIPs.

[smolvenger]

The Boat in the Water: A Beauty and the Beast Story (Loki x Stella Ransome, An MCU/The Essex Serpent Crossover Multi-Part) Chapter Four

Summary: Having lost her health and her husband's fidelity and love, Stella has nothing more to lose than her life. Then...she is swept away to another realm, to an enchanted castle. A castle whose master is a god...a god with a striking resemblance to her husband.

Chapter Word Count: 5K

Chapter Warnings: Pregnancy, childbirth, loss of a child, cheating (I play the Will/Cora affair in a negative light, and if that doesn't sound like your cup of tea, this isn't the fic for you), a bit of violence. If I miss something, please alert me so I can add onto it. A cliffhanger bc I choose violence. Some thirst, but no actual smut

Chapter Word Count: 7K (get water and snacks)

A/N: If someone knows or has immediate access or recalls if the Essex Serpent canonically mentions how the two children of Stella and Will died and I got it wrong, please let me know. I just had to guess. Thank you!

A03//My Ko-Fi//My Etsy Shop//Masterlist//Wattpad

Taglist: @anukulee @asgards-princess-of-mischief @jennyggggrrr @five-miles-over @fictive-sl0th @ladycamillewrites @villainousshakespeare @holdmytesseract @eleniblue @twhxhck @lokisgoodgirl @lovelysizzlingbluebird @raqnarokr @holymultiplefandomsbatman @michelleleewise @wolfsmom1 @cheekyscamp @mochie85 @fandxmslxt69 @skittslackoffilter @mischief2sarawr @jijilaufeyson

They continued to sit on the floor. The fire crackled and Stella found her sandwich was delicious. It was a relief. Some of the dinners could get particularly heavy and would make her stomach hurt if she was not careful. Especially since with the consumption healing, her appetite was returning. This one had the right balance of bread and tomato. Not mushy and with the right crunch of the texture. 

Loki looked relaxed. His dark curls had fallen down, they looked as soft as the feathers of a bird’s wings. Or an angel. He tore off the crust and ate it delicately bit by bit. He looked most handsome when he was at peace.

“All of this is hidden with your magic?” she asked him.

“It is the reverse. It is only certain magical elements that reveal it. I managed to control it. It took some practice, but I can open and close the Jotun form. And you think it not frightening? These beings that have done horrible things.”

“Humans have done horrible things too,” she said.

He hated he was right. Hated she was right about everything she said. It made him silently angry. And yet silently awed. He just wanted more. To hear her speak. To know how she came up with this, and what made her conclude this.

“What other kind of spells can you do?” she asked.

He raised an eyebrow. She set down her sandwich, her eyes dipping down. The nice sky blue ballgown she had on. The skirt was wide enough to balloon around her as they were sitting down. 

“Let me see…”

She began to count on her fingers.

“You can make duplicates, control shadows, change your form...” 

Loki wiped off the crumbs from his leathers.

“I can travel across worlds. Create illusions. Bend things to my will. I can read the memories of people, on special occasions,” he listed.

“Memories?” she repeated.

“Yes.”

“Have you already read mine?” she asked nervously.

“Oh, no- I only watched in my various forms what was happening. It was how I knew about the boat.”

She felt her face burn, but not from the fire. What was it- shame, perhaps?

“I know you must…must pity me. Think me a weak, silly woman,” she added.

“Yet something happened that woman was left to think that was the only action she could take…” he replied.

She looked up. Her plate was already left empty. She didn’t know how she could express it all. Say a word of what occurred in Aldwinter. There were so many words she wanted to say, but she didn’t know how to say it in the right way. Or in a way that her weaknesses would get a better hold of her and cloud her judgment. Or say something unfairly ill of someone.  But a memory- that would be a better, more unbiased way. To have him see everything that happened.

“What is it like? I am only curious… and I feel…you would…would understand everything more in-depth than me telling you,” she prodded.

She thought she saw his lips curl up just slightly.

“Oh, you would like me to read your memories, little star?” he asked.

“Yes, yes I would, please. I won’t mind it. But will it hurt?” she asked.

“No, not at all. All I need do is touch your forehead,” he instructed.

“Alright. You may read my memories Loki.” she permitted.

He set down his place. He nudged closer to her.

“Just one? Or any of them?” he asked.

“Whatever you can find. It won’t bother me.”

“And what if… I see you and your Lusty Vicar in a moment that was…intimate, shall we say?” he teased, a little laugh in his voice.

“Then please don’t dwell on it and move on!” she insisted. Her face was a little red.

He laughed.

“Oh, how I love watching you squirm! Alright…let me try…”

With his long fingers, as lightly as if she were the most valuable porcelain in the palace, he touched her forehead. 

Taking a deep inhale, he began to search through. He found not just one memory, but a lot of them. 

He saw Stella was a young woman. A rosebud amongst the clergypeople at church one Sunday morning. He felt her heart racing as she noticed the handsome young curate with curly hair and hints of a beard, and could feel the warmth in her cheeks whenever for a split second their eyes met. She would return down demurely. But when they went back up, he was still staring at her. As if she was the only one in the cold, grey church.

Then another. He bent his head as he stepped into the house. In his vest rather than his black and white. He had a bunch of flowers in his hand, which he offered to her. It was his second visit. And he brought flowers then too. All throughout tea, he still had that gaze at her.Like she that he was a predator and she was prey. She would blush and pretend she didn’t notice.

He then saw the heartbeat out of its cage as he confessed his feelings. “I love you, Stella.” He went on, though she was too astonished to speak. Praising her beauty, kindness, and virtue. She was crying happy tears. He asked to marry her to follow God’s path for them together and how eagerly she said yes.

He then saw an evening in her room. Her mother was behind her on the bed, combing her hair and rebranding it. And talking.

“The first time it happens, you will bleed. He might be large and it will hurt when he goes inside you, which he will want more than anything else to do. That or to have to pleasure him with your mouth. That’s what all men want.”

He could feel the gasp that couldn’t get out of her and how she felt so hot.

“I wish not to shock you,  Stella. But for you to be ready to be his wife. Even if he is a priest,  he is a man. It’s what men are. You cannot close him off. Much less on your wedding night. The one thing all wives must do- we must consider our husband’s happiness, not our own. It was what God designed us to do- to submit. You must think of that, and fulfill your duty to him once he is your husband. It is not for pleasure, but for duty” while combing her hair.

“What if I can’t…please him?” she asked.

“Then…the truth is, they will find someone else who can,” her mother informed her.

He saw a town hall decked with flowers. Saw flower petals being thrown all over. People dancing. A tuxedo and Stella being spun around, laughing and smiling. Will took her arms and spun her in her wedding gown in the hall, almost childishly. But the adoration and laughter on his face made her forget her anxieties about that night.

He saw the aftermath of the night. He was over her, on top of her. His curls over her face. His pants. And then kissing her, asking her if he hurt her. She said he didn’t. But all Stella could think about was how this was the closest she ever felt to being in heaven.

He saw a peaceful evening, Will sitting and reading as she sewed by the fire. It rained and it was very cozy.

He saw her first pregnancy. Their gasps of surprise. The baby forming in her belly. She felt a little sick, a little dizzy, but thrilled. But how it was excused as she had to go and vomit in a washbin.

He saw the first childbirth. The pain splitting her apart. Her tears, asking for her mother who was there, holding her hand. Then the endless joy as the baby was brought out to be held.

He saw the second pregnancy. She was cramping badly. Sighing as she made another cup of tea. Grateful her maternity corset had the laces on the side. There was going to be a meeting with the deacons soon and she would hear all about it. But what should she make for the women’s bible study? She couldn’t decide. She felt sick again- and the baby was still sobbing in the cradle, a red face and hair with chubby arms and legs. 

She felt the cry stir her, but she rocked the child. She hoped the baby wouldn’t cry during church. Eyes would all go to the front row and she would have to excuse herself out to rock the baby as they all listened to her sermon. Whispering about her. Being a vicar’s wife was being a bug beneath a looking glass. Or the audience for a tightrope walker at a circus. Waiting for the moment she would slip and fall and be disgraced forever. Especially for a small, conservative town. One wrong move from her, or even from her children, and her husband’s ministry and position was done for.

The second childbirth. She was scared, there was pain. The cramps, but worse. Pushing, confused. The faces and voices. There was blood. Then a delivery. Relief flooding through her and happy tears poured down her face.

Then later- there were two little girls tucked into their bed from Mama and Papa. As they slept as sweetly as cherubs, Will would wrap her in an embrace. 

“I live for you, for us, for what we have. You are my life, Stella. Before God, I have you.”

She would smile and kiss his cheek, his beard scratching her.’

“And I for you, my darling,” she replied.

The third pregnancy. It was at the church's Christmas Eve service. One where after his sermon, he went down to sit next to her as the choir sang. The baby began to kick for the first time. She put Will’s hand on it and they smiled.

The third childbirth. Pain and blood. It was a long labor. She wondered if she was going to die.

Only it wasn’t her who emerged dead. It was the baby.

Then, the next year, she entered the nursery one day.

The cloth draped over the little bed. The shape of a child’s body beneath it.

Stella nearly fell down. She felt a sound escape her mouth.

They were going to take Julianna Ransome away. Take away the child…only that wasn’t a child anymore. That was a body. The soul was with God. She had already held her…her last moment, the last thing she ever did, her last embrace and moment of earth was in her mother’s arms as she kissed her forehead. 

Will would rush up, and put a hand on her shoulder.

She went up, wishing to kiss the forehead- tell Julianna that Mama loved her one last time, even if she wasn’t here to hear it.

But the men were coming to dress the body and prepare her for the funeral.

She felt one rough hand from a man push her away roughly. Will held her back as she sobbed. They already had a casket prepared. They lifted the little girl and put her in. Stella couldn’t speak. She couldn't go, clutch protectively over the child.

They carried the casket and left the room and the house.

The second her husband’s arms loosened, Stella felt herself crumple onto the floor. Sobbing violently. Sounds coming out of her that weren’t human. Will over her, a hand on her back and shoulder. He then held her as she sobbed for the daughter they had and lost.

The Fourth Pregnancy. She was craving things but fought them. She had to remain slender somehow. She was always tired. Her feet almost were too swollen for her shoes. She was always tired, trying so hard not to doze at church when Will wasn’t speaking.

The Fourth Childbirth. Blood and pain. It was a breech. The feet was coming out before the head was- and that would stifle her and Will’s child. They had to move it in her belly. Then delivery. The little boy was brought forth safely. 

Jo was starting to walk. Will held her hands as she took her first steps. Stella opened her arms as she walked right to her mother. Then she rocked John in his cradle. A healthy, happy baby having his first laugh. She never thought a laugh would sound so beautiful to her.

Another night of coital bliss. Ecstasy spinning in Stella’s system as Will panted beside her in that bed. She was so glad that her mother was very, very wrong.

The fifth pregnancy. The baby was kicking like a horse. She was feeling sick all of the time.  The doctor advised Will to be careful. She needed some rest after this one. It was taking a toll.

The fifth childbirth. Push, push, push. The baby’s head had retracted back in, so she had to push him out again. She was in pain, splitting her apart. This was ten times any cramp she had during her courses.  There was so much blood. She thought this was her end. 

But the baby arrived. He already had dark, curly hair and she loved him more than anything, holding and kissing him. Calling him the name she and Will decided on if it was a boy.

“Hello James, I’m your mama,” she cooed to the tiny face.

Years later. John and James were in the church playing leapfrog after one service. 

Then he saw Jo collecting books and getting bigger. Claiming she was now a grown-up at the dinner table. Saying she wanted to be a doctor or a lawyer at dinner.

Then…the dead body was discovered on the beach- the second one. The horror of the town in their stillness and big eyes. People crossing themselves. Whispers of a Serpent. One that would even abduct children…perhaps one of their own, Stella feared. She could only hold her husband's hand. She remembered those words- “It’s God’s punishment, but we’ll get it through together.”

Then a dinner. She wore her nice pearl earrings and a nice dress for a guest.

“My husband will not judge you,” she assured the guest.

A woman with blonde hair, round cheeks, and squinty eyes, but slim and pretty. Who ate beside a young boy with dark brown hair. In the dim light of the dark house, one could see streaks of red in the woman’s astonishingly golden hair.

Her husband looking at the woman intensely. Hypnotized. Like he couldn’t tear his eyes off. Like she was art.

Once upon a time, he looked at Stella like that.

But she would not say anything. She cut up her meat in delicate, small bites and ate slowly. Listening to the woman discuss science. 

Then another. Will in a tuxedo. He was dancing with that woman. She could only watch from the corner as everyone stared at them like they were a fairytale.

She didn’t matter anymore. And she would learn to accept she didn’t matter anymore. 

Then a bed. Her bloody handkerchiefs. Nothing but a room full of blue crosses and her blue bed. Nothing, nothing, nothing. 

He was done. There was no doubt where he was.

She could sense it and she would not stop it.

Will told her God wanted him to lie with Cora.

I’ve done my duty, God. I’ve done my duty, mother. My time is done.  God is calling me and I must follow Him without question. She thought.

All as her heart still beat.

Loki let go. He had seen so much. He retracted his fingers and found himself in the present.

She was crying a little.

“- I-I’m so sorry…” he apologized. He conjured a handkerchief and handed it to her.

She shook her head, accepting it.

‘No, I’m glad you saw. So you would understand just a little.” she recalled.

“You saw it?” he asked.

“Yes…” she confirmed. She wiped a few tears, doing her best to gather herself.

“I do understand. Everything,” he said.

She took a deep breath. She had purged her memories, her past. Just a mere few of many. She then extended her hand.

“Lok….let us dance now in that ballroom. I’d like to dance a waltz with you, please…”

He cocked his head. His old mischief returned to him. “A waltz? Well, Little Star, we haven’t waltzed before! A waltz is….it has an interesting history of being a little bit scandalous because it involves…”

“I would like to waltz with you, Loki.” she interrupted. 

He led her to the ballroom. There were candles lit around the wide space to make it brighter, the pale, hard floors echoing beneath her steps.

 He wrapped her in an embrace. 

“Loki, I have one more request. Could you do it?” she asked.

‘Why, that depends on what the request is.”

“You’ve seen so much of me, but I have only seen so much of you. Loki…could I dance with you in your form?”

‘I am in it.’

“Your real form.”

“This is my real form. If you wish to dance-”

“Your Frost Giant Form, I mean.”

He transformed. He was blue and with red eyes His skin chilled her touch, sending shivers down her spine but keeping her awake and alert.

With a nod of his head, there were violins playing a song in three-quarter time. They began to move into a square. She kept her eyes down a little to watch her feet. She could feel a stiff silence in Loki- as if she was now afraid of his Frost Giant form. But keeping her eyes away, it made the words pour out of her mouth easier.

“He was my entire life and I didn’t satisfy him. I didn’t make him happy…so he looked elsewhere.… I failed my duty.” she mourned.

Loki tightened his hold on her and nearly swung her into the next step.

“Don’t say that! You never once failed in your duty, Stella!”

She perked up as he said her name. There was an added fierceness that the bright crimson of his eyes made apparent. Though the music was playing, Loki’s voice could easily be heard over it.

“I have seen your life. You are anything but a failure. You never failed the priest. He failed you as a husband, have you ever considered that?”

“No,” she replied.

“You love. Intensely. Fiercely. More than anyone knows. More than anyone I have met. I have nothing but hate inside me, but you have nothing but love inside you. But you shouldn’t let that love allow others to treat you like you’re their servant and not an equal to them…”

“It’s…it could be sinful,” she replied meekly.

“Your mortal ways and faith. Is saying no a sin? Is being angry that you were mistreated, taken advantage of a sin? Is it a sin to fight back? To protect yourself? I can tell you, here there is no such thing!”

“I don’t want to complain or be ungrateful.”

“You never did! But keeping it inside and letting them torment you will kill you, Stella, faster than that mortal illness ever could. Fight. Fight, Stella. Fight back. Be furious. Sob. Scream. But fight.” he insisted.

She stared up at him in wonder, though they continued to move. 

“I was always so ashamed after I cried after I fell to anger…” she confessed.

The music continued. She heard a violin trill.

“I’d rather you feel the pain than not feel at all…do you feel any pain now?” he asked.

“No… I don’t…”

He gave her a smirk,

“Good,”

“Do you feel any pain, Loki?”

“No, because you are an excellent dancer…”

They walked for a few minutes in silence. It sounded like the song was going to end. She leaned closer. There was a last chord in major that resolved, the echoes of the strings melting away. 

“Loki…the music is over, but…hold me. Please. Just for a little.”

He leaned forward and wrapped his arms around her. She hugged him back. He felt cold, yet she held on. She then heard a sound like a ruffle of feathers and from the corner of her eye, there was a green light. He changed to his form with pale skin. How…warm he felt compared to the ice. Soft and comforting.  She rested her forehead on his chest. For a god, he felt so human, so real, so comforting. She felt his long arms wrap around her, envelop her as if they were wings. She nestled further. Enjoying the closeness, the tenderness of his touch. 

She held on as long as she needed to. And then she let go.

“You just wanted an embrace.”

“Yes…”

“I’m glad you asked. Don’t be afraid to,” he said.

“I…I won’t, Loki,” she replied.

He escorted her to her room. 

“Loki I….” the words came out of her. He tilted his head.

She restrained herself. She wouldn’t. She couldn’t. She’d be as bad as her husband.

“I hope you sleep well, goodnight.”

“Goodnight, my little star.”

She felt herself blush at “my” as she closed the door.

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

The next morning, Stella woke up. She felt oddly refreshed like a weight was lifted off of her. 

She went down to the piece of paper on the vanity. She began to comb her hair. Looking a the bed, she admitted that last night…the temptation was there. She admitted it silently to herself. She was a few steps away from the precipice, asking Loki to stay with her in her room for the night. Just to hold her, talk to her, and…no, what if it progressed? What if he kissed her? What if he- she couldn’t even name what else her weakness would have let her do! Only glad her strength prevailed.

But…she did like that song from that one time. When the illness attacked her and he sang. If only she could understand the words!

She looked down at the paper.

“Hello there. I know it’s been a minute. But, what were the words of the song Loki sang to me? The night I got sick?”

The words were listed there.

“Which one was the part he sang lower at the beginning?” she asked.

It shortened to the lyrics. Though she liked the two words that read as “Star Mojen.” It sounded like “star maiden” which was a pretty image in her head.

Then…it struck her…the hand kiss. That was the very line he kissed her hand on…

“And what do they mean in English?”

The translation appeared.

““In stormy black mountains

I wander alone

Over the glacier I move forward”

She found this meaning in the line with the star maiden line.

“In the apple orchard stands the maiden, so beautiful.”

Warm tingles appeared all over her. That was the line he dedicated to her! He was making her the maiden in the song.

The rest of the translation of that bit appeared:

“And sings, ‘When will you come home?’”

She looked about the place. Once, she longed to be back in the white house on the marshes again. But now…the longer she stayed there, the more she was home. And the more being with Loki felt like being home.

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

He only appeared at dinner that time. Wearing a grand cape with yellow on the inside. She noticed how long he had grown his hair. His dark curls were falling down to his shoulders.

“I wanted to thank you for last night,” she began once he sat down.

He conjured himself a glass of wine. “Oh, really I should be the one thanking you.”

“I wish I had your boldness, your confidence, Loki,” Stella replied. She got out her knife and fork and began to politely take small bites of her roast chicken.

“And I wish I had your heart. I don’t think at times I could ever forgive my father…” he said.

“Your father? What did he do?” she asked.

He took a sip as if for liquid courage.

“Well, he was the one who plucked me as an infant from Jotunheim. He brought me to live in Asgard in the palace. As the second-born son to the throne. The runner-up. Second best. But not the favorite, as my dear brother is,” he hissed bitterly.

She spoke no words of judgment. Only wiped her mouth with her napkin before placing it on her lap.

“Well, he was always letting Thor do whatever he wanted and letting him be his heir and me the unequal. Oh, and did I mention, he kept me being a Frost Giant as a secret until I found out by accident!” he vented.

“Oh, Loki, he shouldn’t have,” she commented.

“And do you know what he said? He said my birthright was to die! And that I should be grateful!” his face colored bright red and his eyebrows furrowed.

“A parent shouldn’t say that to a child…” she agreed.

“At times, I wish I could shove him off of the rainbow bridge, I would, and I-”

“Loki, how is containing all of this anger and rage going to make you any happier?” she asked.

He silently fumed. Two hands over his cup of wine.

“You have to talk to him. Tell him that you were hurt. If I hurt my John, I would rather him tell me than silently hate me.”

“All I can think of now is how I will get the throne to be my own-”

“Loki, did you know your brother came by and asked for you?”

He blinked.

“What?! That dolt of a brother arrived here?” he asked.

“Yes! He has been looking for you! He loves you and misses you! And your mother worries about you…Loki, tearing yourself away from people who care about you will only make things worse. If you let your hate for Odin consume you, eat you away…how will you see all the people who love you who are willing to help you?”

“Thor is arrogant and dangerous-”

“You can be jealous of someone and love them too. You can be angry at someone and love them. And sitting down stewing in fury and doing nothing isn’t going to solve a wit of your problems.”

He looked at her. She, who had been through so much, who was loved and thrown to the side like a child’s toy. Yet she still loved people, cared for them, and had hope, had kindness inside of her.

“It…it won’t solve anything…” he agreed.

“You can tell someone how they hurt you. And you can love someone the same, and treasure what love you have in your life…” she said.

“My Frost Giant form though…that is a sight some of them will have to get used to.”

“I think it’s beautiful,” she said.

He cocked an eyebrow. He then got up. He used magic to conjure his chair to be next to her.

“Oh! A Frost Giant- beautiful, you say?” he asked.

“You’re…well, beautiful in every form,” she admitted, with a shy glance down at her napkin.

He paused. He drank her in. Her ballgown. The soft blonde of her hair and sweet eyes. 

He couldn’t help himself. He added in-

“As are you.”

Her eyes went big. Her hands clenched where they were laying on the table. She looked back down.

“Well, I have, I have marks on me from the pregnancies and I am not Mrs. Seaborne, but-”

He cut her off. He went to her, even closer. She felt her breath catch as he cupped her face, forcing her to look into his eyes.

“Stella are beautiful in your nightgown. You’re beautiful in your gowns. You were beautiful when you were swollen with child. You were beautiful when you brought each child out. You are beautiful with your hair free and undone. You’re beautiful when you braid it. You are beautiful when your hands and skirt are dirty from the garden. You’re beautiful when you sit and sew without a speck of dirt on you. I will never be worthy to even be seen standing next to you, and anyone who sees us will ask questions about what a great beauty like you is doing being seen next to me. Just because you are alive and here- that is what makes me think of nothing but you, because you are the very stars in your name. Internally and on your person.”

She was frozen for a minute. Processing it all. Her mouth lowered and could only release a little air. She could see the blue of his eyes, the soft elegance of his features.

 Then, at last, she said, “I haven’t been called beautiful for months.”

Loki’s eyes turned shiny 

“What…really? You should be called beautiful. Every day,” he said. 

 Her breath returned to her. She smiled. 

“Loki, if you are a monster…how could you come up with that? You have more goodness in you than you think. I…I…thank you,” she continued.

They danced something other than a waltz. Loki was glad. He didn’t want to hold her in his arms again. Every time he touched her, he wanted more. And every time she got close, he didn’t want to let her go.

“She’s just a mortal. One of a million. Who am I to get involved with some lowly mortal woman? And that’s not to mention she isn’t free,” Loki thought, scolding himself.

Those thoughts dissipated as the music ended and they bowed and curtsied.

He only wished her goodnight. Still…part of him hoped she would weaken. Give into temptation. Ask for him at night. To lie with him, be with him…He felt something stirring in his groin at the image of her naked in that bed. He hated himself for it and increased his pace further from her room. 

But he knew her better than that. Part of him wanted to curse and throw something. Her husband could roll about in the grass with a hundred women and swim nude in the sea and even touch himself in its waters whenever he wanted- but she couldn’t!

He said nothing but clenched his fists tight. He then stormed off to find another room to douse himself in cold water.

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

Stella sat Writing more letters to her family one afternoon. She set them on the chest in her room and it vanished to be delivered to them.

She missed….she thought she missed them, but she missed people. Having someone, anyone to talk to during the day. It then struck her how lonely she was. Loki had appeared only sometimes during the day. Would he appear before dinner like he sometimes did with the sheep episode? Then they’d eat and dance. Then he was gone. Did he even sleep here? Considering how big the castle was, he might have been in some secret room.

Her life was always busy, for there were three children, a dog, a church, a village, and a husband to keep up with. When it was declared she was sick, everything was so quiet. There was nothing to do but lie in bed and wait to die. She would spend whole days alone in that house, on that bed, with no energy except to sometimes ask for visitors to see them again and to stare out the window at the marshes. And pray for God to prepare her to enter heaven.

Now there was no longer a threat of death. She was due for a visit to the healers today to check on her. But as used as she was to being alone…she felt lonely. If only Loki could be there to conjure some trick or say something to make her laugh or blush. She…she missed him.

And why should she sit around waiting in an enchanted castle like she did every day here? Even cleaning and gardening was getting tiresome. As she looked around, she saw there was a shining golden city. And the carriage was going to take her to the healer's cottage for her appointment today. The city was just outside of it…but the city itself was only a ten-minute walk from their cottage.

What was Asgard like? And the people too…how different were they from Midgardians?

She waited for the carriage. It took her to the appointment in the healer's cottage. They declared she was improving after a few tests. As she stepped out, she looked at the nearby gates and the tops of the buildings peeking out.

Besides, she couldn’t help but be curious. 

She went down to the cottage and sat in it. But instead of asking it to return, she knocked on it’s ceiling and asked aloud:

“I’d like to visit that city over there, please!”

It took her down, further to Asgard. A shining city full of people going about with long robes for clothes and elaborately braided hair. White birds flew about looking for crumbs that grandmothers tossed to them. Children ran about and played without any fear of a serpent lurking anywhere to eat them.

Stella stepped out. She felt a little embarrassed in her day dress of light blue still having puffed sleeves and petticoats compared to everyone else. She noticed a dress shop on one corner and walked to it.

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

“You…you spoke with who again?! There are too many names, just how many friends did you make?” Loki cried.

She smiled. She sat proudly in her cerulian Asgardian dress she bought. Her shoulders were exposed and her hair in its side braid.

“Oh, Audur!, she’s delightful. She is a new mother and I was glad to give her some advice and help her with the baby- she had the sweetest little boy, he hardly cried and he’s so small! Oh, and there’s the shop Seigfriend owns- I felt odd going about in these clothes, but I find the Asgardian fashions fascinating. He managed to give me this one on sale. Oh, and I also saw a temple and was curious- your people do make offerings and they vanish! How fascinating! A priest named Tristan said he would explain more to me. I was invited to a little book club and sewing circle by Brunhilde and a few other ladies who sensed I was new and wanted to welcome me-Oh! And these!”

She reached into her pockets and pulled out the pebbles, pure dark blue with sparkles inside them.

“I found these just on the ground! They’re beautiful! Like gems! Isn’t it like the night sky?” she boasted.

He cocked an eyebrow.

“Why aren’t you amazed?” she asked.

“Little Star, They’re ordinary! They’re everywhere in Asgard!

“Oh, but you can find so much beauty and meaning in the most ordinary of things, Loki. You just have to look…conjure my box, please.”

He did as she requested. She opened the lid on the table, digging about. Then she brought out a seashell. A conch that curled into itself with a hole. She held it over to him. He felt the edges.

“It’s beautiful. Like a piece of art,” she said. “Do you see the little edges? And how smooth it is. And this was not made by man…nature made it. It did that naturally. Why is that not amazing?” she asked.

‘It is..” he admitted.

She then handed him the blue stone.

“And this one…we have the whole sky above our heads. But here, we can just hold it in our hands easily. Isn’t that beautiful in itself? I know you’re a god, Loki, but when I merely cup this, I feel like a goddess myself. I feel what it is like to have a whole thing, a whole existence just in your hand…”

He ran a thumb over it. And then he returned it to her hand. Their skin brushed against each other.

“Could I invite Brunhilde and a few others over to the palace?” she asked.

Loki grinned. A mischievous light in his eyes. 

“I tell you what- we should throw a ball!”

“A ball?” she repeated.

“Would you like that? To invite your friends? You will be in charge of invitations! I don’t think you’ve ever been to a grand ball before, Stella. I’ll make sure everything looks up to par and that there’s enough food and your friends can all enjoy themselves?”

Stella’s eyes beamed. Then she released her hands from his. She set the pebbles in the box and closed the lid.

“I will on one condition…you be there. You go too, as a guest. You are the first I would like to invite.”

Loki put a hand to his chest in fake surprise.

“Why! I would be delighted! We should take a bit of time to plan, and then we can set a date. Until then, we better brush up on our dancing, don’t you agree,  little star?”

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

Will knelt down to pray that evening. He couldn’t sleep. He was still clothed, pacing about the bedroom. Everything suddenly felt empty- as if she was dead and buried already. His mind reeling.

He knelt next to that bed.

“Dear Lord…bring her back to me. Keep her safe.” he prayed.

Whoever this “Loki” was as he called himself, he was keeping her safe and had apparent access to a cure. He wasn’t sure if this was the man he saw. He wasn’t sure how he and Stella managed to vanish in the blink of an eye or how. Or even where this city called Asgard could be found…or if she would return. He could only pray and wait.

Then, he jumped. His jaw went slack, for there was something there he had never seen before.

A portal opened. The rim was green and had golden light glowing from it. He heard music and laughter. Inside, he thought he saw a ballroom and a crowd of people.

Crossing himself, he walked through.

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

Meticulously as they planned it, the ball began smoothly. Stella’s friends in Asgard invited their friends and then their friends. For they heard of an enchanted castle and wanted to see it, as well as hear and see the famous trickster god reappearing among them.

Stella wanted to somehow invite the royal family. But the guards would not let some puny mortal pass as much as a letter through their gates. Perhaps there would be another time.

The Aesir in their robes were all gasping at the sight of the palace. It had an older, even Midgardian style to the place. Audur went up and greeted Stella. Saying how glad she and her husband found a babysitter for the night. Brunhilde embraced her as if she had known her for years. Music was already playing, not that it stopped all the chatter.

The violins had settled. Loki appeared before her. His curls were washed and looked soft and beautiful. He dressed in his finer robes. He wore no cape, but his black and green had hints of golden armor. Stella herself was wearing a gown that was more Asgardian in its longness and simple sleeves, its exposed neck. It was a pastel blue as if she was the day sky melting into the night.

“You are radiance itself today,” he said.

“My, how gallant of you!” she replied at him.

There was a starting cord.

“I must tell you, I asked them to give us the first dance…shall we do it together? Or, would you rather the others partner up?” he asked.

He held out his hand.

“Oh, that is nothing I cannot take. We can dance, Loki,” she replied.

She touched her hand on his. With a grin, he led her onto the floor. There was a clearing and here they were in the center. 

They got into position. He lifted her hand up in the air, their fingers intertwining.

Loki saw Will out of the corner of his eye. There in the crowd. Stella was clearly oblivious to him, for his plain vest blended amid the Asgardian colors.

Loki put his hand on the small of Stella’s back and pulled her in tighter.

Stella was starting to shiver again. She nearly forgot the steps. Something about Loki being close…and everyone watching, watching them embrace. She clutched onto his arm as if he were a raft keeping her above the water.

The music began and they waltzed.

He was smiling. And for once, a large, happy smile was on her face as well. She didn’t want to look away. He was so beautiful. So real. And there.

They covered more ground. Going a little faster. She kept up with his steps well. She felt like she was truly flying, her blue skirt swishing about.

She looked at him, and she broke into a smile so big, she bared her teeth. She felt a small laugh break out from her in her happiness.

Loki relaxed his posture and smiled softly at her too. That look on her face, the pure joy on it…

 She was all that made sense. All that was real and true and good in the world. He could have held her and danced for eternity.

Stella went to Loki and locked eyes. It was a waltz. They did it before. But he held her tighter. 

Will stood there, watching helplessly. People smiled as they watched. He could only see the look of adoration in Stella’s eyes to this man. Her eyes were so bright, her happiness beaming across the room like light. This was not a smile she would reserve for anyone.

It then hit him, His wife was dancing with a man she was in love with.

Loki couldn’t help but force a smirk at bay as he felt Will’s presence in the crowd. His portal worked as planned. And the vicar was there to seep in the rich, rich irony of it all of his own medicine being fed to him in a big, hearty dose.

As the music rose to a crescendo, Loki then grabbed his hands around her waist. Stella gasped. Then easily, he lifted her up and twirled her around, her skirt flying around her like a water painting. But she only laughed in delight. He then set her down as the final chord resolved.

The crowd applauded. There was going to be another dance in a few minutes. But Stella went away to talk to some friends. They led her off to the table to enjoy the delicacies that was served. Excitedly chatting away as they went over, blending into the crowd.

Loki was catching his breath when he heard a voice. A voice just like his own say-

‘Pardon me, sir!”

Will went forward to him. Loki felt his whole body tighten. Loki wasn’t sure to be excited, miserable, angry, thrilled all at once. Despite the similarity in their features, people hardly glanced at them. For one had dark hair and the other auburn-blonde-brown, no one would notice their similarities unless they looked closer and heard the voices.

“Sir- where is Mrs. Stella Ransome? Do you know where she went?” Will asked.

Loki frowned. He glared down at the man with as much intimidation as he could. He responded with the same voice. 

“Then answer me this- why should I take you to her? Why should I let you in the same room she is in?  Why let you look at her and hear her voice when you aren’t worthy to as much as kiss the ground she walks on? Why should I let you as much as lay your filthy hands on one hair on her head? Why should I give her to you?” the god demanded. 

People were starting to turn heads. There was silence, for the music could not even play as people quieted to watch.

Stella turned around. Her eyes took in long, curly hair. A wisp of a goatee. A vest. High cheekbones and blue eyes.

She dropped her plate to where it dropped her salad onto the floor. She began to tremble. She couldn’t think, couldn’t breathe, couldn’t speak. 

Will held his ground. He looked directly into the god’s eyes.

“Because she is my wife.”

There was a pause. Only a flicker of a second too long for anyone to intervene.

Loki got out his dagger and stabbed Will.

[its-time-to-write]

ch. 4 - hustling for the good life

table of contents Oh hey it’s Jamie’s side of things

also. I don’t proofread. yes I’m sorry, no I won’t change my ways.

takes one to know one

Here’s the thing. While you’ve been hopping around London, doing interviews and press and meeting all sorts of talented musicians, Jamie’s been doing his own work. Namely, badgering Keeley about his chances with you.

“She’s really pretty,” he confessed in the car on the way home from Isaac and Stella’s. “She’s like, fucking I don’t know, ethereal or some shit.” Keeley’s basically passed out, which is why Jamie is talking so freely. He knows she won’t remember shit. 

“Learned that word the other day,” he continues, “It’s like something you see can can’t totally understand. Or like, out of your league. Anyway, that’s her. Think she was all freaked out, though. Maybe too many people. Weird, innit, international star like her anxious in a crowd of people. But I really liked talking to her. Fuck, Keeley, she’s smart. You can tell in her lyrics.”

Keeley responds with a snore.

Jamie chuckles. “Yeah, alright, we’re almost to Roy’s. Don’t breathe a word of this to anyone, yeah? Like I said, not like she’d go with someone like me anyway.”

—

Jamie severely underestimated Keeley’s ability to retain juicy gossip. Yeah she was sloshed, so much so that Roy had to carry her inside and onto the bed, but that didn’t stop her from sending Jamie a text the next morning that said, ?????? and a gif of your face.

Jamie replied in kind. ??????

U fucking kno what im asking, Keeley replied. U like her.

Jamie responds, that aint a question, keels

Fine, Keeley writes, here’s one

What the fuck did you mean, ‘someone like me????’

Jamie grimaces and puts his phone down. He’ll respond to that later but now, he has to go running around the field and puke his guts out because Roy’s a fucking sadist.

—

Jamie’s been a fan of your music since, like, your first single. He’s not even sure how he first heard it but he did, and then he’d listen to it when no one could catch him.

Then you started gaining popularity, and it was more acceptable for him to listen to your soft yet upbeat songs. He came home one weekend to find his mum playing Blue Glass on a speaker in the kitchen, and they sat down at the counter and listened to the entire album, not speaking the whole time while Simon puttered around cooking dinner.

He’s followed your career through the trade from Manchester to Richmond, then back to Man City and then Richmond again. 

And yeah, he’s had a little bit of a crush.

But god, there’s no fucking way he has a shot in hell. Sure, he’s the Premier League’s top player, but you? You’re on another level.

Paps don’t even bother trying to slander you anymore because they’ll never find a speck of dirt on you. There are always pictures of you volunteering, or visiting kids in hospitals, or petting dogs or some shit. Stuff that’s usually staged, but with you it isn’t.

You’ve never had a scandal hit the papers, always been spotted out with a famous model/actor/singer boyfriend who has never once been seen cheating on you. Jamie wonders if anyone could even consider cheating on someone with as much talent and kindness as you seem to possess.

Anyway, you’d never go for someone with his relatively checkered past. All you have to do is google “Jamie Tartt,” and there he is, making out with models, headlining cheating scandals, and having sex in fucking jacuzzis.

Yeah, you’d never go for it.

But as he’s at training, running drills and practicing goals, he keeps thinking about the way you looked with your feet in the pool, hair blowing softly in the breeze.

He decides to have a serious chat with Keeley.

—

He turns up to Keeley’s house and fucking Roy’s there, except this time it’s not really a surprise. Roy opens the door, scoffs, then walks away. 

“Prick’s here,” he calls to Keeley somewhere in the house, except it’s not as angry as it used to be. Jamie can almost trick himself into thinking it’s affectionate.

“Hello to you too, grandad,” he says to Roy’s back. Roy grunts and heads to the kitchen, presumably to finish making dinner. 

Keeley bounds down the stairs and wraps Jamie in a hug. “Glad you’re here, babe. Now we can have a good chat.”

She leads him to the couch and hands him a fluffy pink pillow, one that Jamie remembers throwing across the room more than once. Fuck, there’s another reminder why he shouldn’t even be thinking of seeing you again. He couldn’t properly emote when he was with Keeley, so how’s he supposed to navigate a serious relationship?

“Oi, stop overthinking,” Keeley says, snapping her fingers in front of his face.

“Weren’t overthinking,” Jamie replies automatically. “And since when are you a mindreader?” 

Keeley grins at that. “I’m not. Your face was just all twisty and shit, which means you’re actually using your brain for once. So come on, out with it.”

Jamie’s not entirely sure where to begin, but he opens his mouth and everything sort of comes spilling out. How he talked to you for ten seconds and is pretty sure he’ll never actually love again. And he’s convinced himself that he might have a shot but then he’s reminded of all his shitty choices and thinks he’ll never measure up but god fucking damnit, he wants something real and yeah, you’re another celebrity, but there’s something about your eyes or maybe it’s the way you move your hands, but he knows for sure that if you were just a regular girl he saw on the street, he’d feel the exact same way. 

Except neither of you are like, actually regular people, but for different reasons. And his fucking shitbag of a father is always looming in the back of his mind, especially since playing Man City the other week, and he won’t let his dad try to have any sort of hold over you because that would be shitty. So anyway, he’s pretty sure that’s everything and he’s probably going to die alone.

Keeley says, “Whoa,” with big eyes once he’s finished, and for a moment Jamie thinks she’s going to call a mental institute, but then she cocks her head and says, “Jamie, you do know that nothing’s actually happened, right? Like, you haven’t even asked her out?” and Jamie realizes that he’s been knee deep in his mind for a fucking long time.

“I mean, Roy’s no saint,” she continues while Roy shouts, “Oi!” from the kitchen, “and we still got together.”

Jamie just looks at her.

“Alright, bad example,” she says. “But hey, you’ll never know if you don’t try. I mean come on, you’re Jamie fucking Tartt! You’re like, the best footballer in all of England! And you’re right fit,” she says just loud enough for Roy to hear.

“I can’t cook for shit,” Jamie says miserably, and Roy barks out a short laugh while Keeley pats Jamie’s arm.

“You’re way too far in your fucking head, babe,” she says sympathetically. “Take it one day at a time, yeah? You don’t even know if you’ll see her again.”

table of contents

[cameronspecial]

A New Kind Of Normal (Part 6)

Pairing: Dad!Rafe Cameron x Reader

Warnings: Drug Use, Mentions about Relapse and Talks About Getting Better After a Relapse

Pronouns: She/Her

Word Count: 2.0K

Summary: Rafe doesn't know if he has what it takes to be the person that Stella and Y/N deserve.

Masterlist

Rafe has been giving Y/N her space, but it didn’t mean he stopped trying to get her to forgive him. He sent letter after letter. Gift after gift. All of them returned. NA meetings, anger management sessions, therapy appointments and calls from Diana all go ignored as he seeks solace in his drug of choice and ways of getting Y/N to let him back into her life. It is safe to say his week is not going so great.

Lucky or maybe unlucky for him, Wheezie and Sarah were still allowed to see the light of his life and would report back to him how she had been doing. Learning how much Stella misses him causes guilt to form in his stomach. He told his father he wouldn’t be the type of father to leave his daughter, but it was his decision that forced Y/N to create that distance. Every fibre of his body wants to hate Y/N for taking Stella away from him and causing Stella pain by doing so, yet he only seems to crave Y/N’s smile and proximity. He craves their late-night phone calls and her reassurance that he can stay sober. The silence on her end makes him believe she has given up on him. That he has no hope of getting back on the proverbial horse. Again, the only thing that can help remove the little voice inside his head saying he isn’t good enough for his dad, Y/N and Stella is the powder the powder that dries up his nose.. 

After yet another attempt to gain Y/N’s forgiveness doesn’t work, Rafe finds himself returning home from Barry’s with Ziploc bags in his pockets. He has been sleeping in his house in the Outer Banks since his apartment near Y/N’s only reminds him of what he has lost. Before he met Stella, he thought the big house was all he could ask for. That the material things could fill him with happiness. But with Y/N and Stella now in his life, he knows he could not have been more wrong. He begins to feel he will never be happy again without them in his life and he rushes to the closest flat surface. 

His hands shake as he tears the bag open, letting the coke spill all over the entranceway table. He takes his credit card out and starts to form line after line. One finger comes up to his nose to block one of his nostrils so the other can inhale the drug. He does every single line until he runs out. Frustration overcomes him when he can’t get the next bag out of his pocket, so he gives up and opts to try to sleep to help dull his toxic thoughts. He is too lazy to move out of the front room, lying down in the middle of the room spread out like a starfish. 

——

Sarah and Wheezie find their older brother as soon as they open his front door. Sarah would have walked on top of him if she wasn’t looking where she was going. Both girls knew what had happened and that he wasn’t faring well. They knew he had started using again. Wheezie kneels beside Rafe’s head and slaps him awake. He bolts forward, letting out a gasp of fear. “What did you do that for?” he groans, rubbing his cheek. She looks at him with slight disappointment, “We both know you wouldn’t have woken up if we tried a nicer way of doing it.” “Okay, that may be true. What are you doing here?” he questions. It is Sarah’s turn to reply. “We are worried about you. We know you are using again and you are never going to get sober again if you don’t talk to someone.” He lies back down with a shake of his head, “What is the point of getting sober again if I’m never going to see Stella again?” 

Sarah doesn’t respond for a second; instead, she looks for something in her purse. She finally finds what she is looking for and pulls out a piece of paper. Rafe takes the outstretched paper hesitantly. The worry that he is about to read a custody agreement from Y/N fills him with dread. However, he carefully unfolds the paper to find a drawing. The stick figures with pointy hats would not make any sense to most people, but to her father, he knew exactly what they were meant to be. It is a picture of him and his little girl holding hands with witches’ hats on their heads. The big round circle beside him must be a cauldron and the black blob beside Stella must be the cat she has always wanted. The only word he can make out from the indecipherable letters is Stella’s name. Y/N is doing such a great job at teaching Stella to write her name. 

Wheezie can see the confusion about the words on Rafe’s face and goes in to translate for him. “It says get well soon. Y/N told Stella the reason you aren’t coming over is because you are sick. You want a reason to get sober?” Wheezie starts to explain. “That’s your reason to get sober again. Yes, you may not be able to see her right now, but that little girl is waiting for you to come back and you are never going to do that if you keep spiralling.” He sits back up to see the picture in a better light. Tears start to form in his eyes as all his feelings about missing his daughter come crashing down. 

“She needs me still,” he whispers to himself. Yes, his father and Y/N may think he is useless but Stella doesn’t. She hasn’t forgotten about him and still wants him to come back even after he hasn’t talked to her in a week. That is one thought he doesn’t want to leave his head, except he realizes it always does whenever he seeks comfort from the cocaine. It may help him forget about the pain Ward has caused him, but he also forgets the love he gets from Stella. And that beats every other feeling. He gets up from the floor, pulling the rest of the coke easily out of his pocket now that he can think a little more clearly. He hands it to Sarah, “Get rid of this for me, please?” She nods her head and he brings both of his sisters in for a hug. “Thank you for not giving up on me. I promise I’m going to try again,” he tells them. They both return the hug, Wheezie pressing her head against his shoulder, “We believe you and we are here to help.” He may never hear those words from his father, but he is so glad he has his sisters to give him the support their father never could. 

——

“I screwed up, Diana. She’s never going to forgive me.” Diana gives him a concerned look, “Rafe, it’s going to take more than a week for her to forgive you, especially since you only decided to try to get sober today.” Rafe nods his head, playing with the band of his watch. “Right… So you think I have a chance,” he hopes. She gives him a soft smile, “I do. If you give her time and take this one day at a time, I think she’ll come around. Show her how much they both mean to you.” “I can do that. One day at a day,” he repeats. 

——

Luna’s Diner feels so much darker with the knowledge that Y/N is angry at him. He knows he should give her space, but this week has been the longest he has gone without seeing Stella or Y/N. He’s nervous as he listens to the little bell announce his arrival. The little girl at the counter looks up from her colouring and her face lights up when she sees who it is. “Daddy!” she yells, running over to him. He picks her up and brings her into a tight hug. “Are you feeling better, Daddy?” He gives her a kiss on the temple, “I am, little witch. Thank you for my card. I loved it.” Rafe sits on a stool with Stella in his lap. She tells him everything he has missed during their week away. Sabrina is now her friend again because they realize Will is a gross boy. Stella and Sabrina are now dating and their wedding is on Monday. 

“Uncle Benny and I made sculptures. His was as tall as me,” she recounts, throwing her arms apart to exaggerate. Rafe giggles at how happy she is. The sight Y/N comes back to angers her and she is about to blow a fuse. “What are you doing here?” she grits through her teeth. She rounds the counter to take Stella in her hands. He stands up with his hands in the air to show he meant no harm, “I just wanted to talk to you. And catch up with Stella.” “You lost the right to do that when you rela- when you did what you did while Stella was home,” she argues. 

“I know, you know I regret that completely. I will never forgive myself for putting her in danger. I want you to know I’m back on track to getting better.” 

“That’s great. But I can’t just trust you like that again Rafe,” she snaps her fingers to iterate her point. “I want you to leave, please.” Stella looks between the two adults in confusion, wondering why it seemed they were talking in code. Rafe looks into Y/N’s eyes and sees the frustrations she feels. He doesn’t want to cause her any more trouble, so he heads toward the door. “Daddy, where are you going? Aren’t you going to play with me?” Stella calls out in a plea. His heart stops for a second and he doesn’t know how to get it to start beating again. He shakes his head sadly, “I’m sorry, little witch, but I have to go. I have work tomorrow.” Stella’s eyes start to brim with tears. “But you didn’t give me a hug yet,” she cries, holding out her arms for him. He looks at Y/N to confirm he is allowed to and she gives a solemn nod. She can’t deny her daughter a moment with her father. 

Y/N puts Stella down on the floor and Stella runs to her father. She goes into his arms, burying her head into his neck, “Bye-bye, Daddy. Forever and always?” He returns the intensity of her hug and kisses her. “Forever and always.” Her feet find the floor again and she watches as Rafe leaves her. He turns around when on the other side of the glass, blowing the little girl a kiss. Stella may not understand what is going on between her parents, but she can sense something has changed between them and that she might never see her father again. She goes back to her mother with hopeful eyes, “When can we see Daddy again?” “I don’t know, Baby. I’m sorry,” Y/N hates to say, giving the girl a hug to comfort her. 

——

Rafe does not blame Y/N for still being mad at him and for being hesitant to bring her back into their lives. He broke her trust, which is a sacred thing. The gifts were obviously not working and he is honestly glad it doesn't. Thinking back on it, he wants to gain her trust back through actions instead of materialistic things. He isn’t sure how to make it up to her, but he knows he can start a plan. First things, booking his next therapy appointment and increasing how often he sees Dr. Winters. Next, he will meet with Diana and reflect on why he relapsed so he can make a relapse prevention plan. Finally, make a list of possible places to go to rehab if he feels he can’t get sober in his current environment. 

Yes, this plan isn’t about getting back Y/N, but it helps him with recovering from his relapse and this will hopefully show Y/N how serious he is. As he writes down his plan, he vows to do everything in his power to gain back Y/N’s trust and show her he will never make the mistake of putting Stella in danger again.  

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[blueshistorysims]

September 1922, Henford-on-Bagley, England

Before he decided to visit the smaller country house, he had it updated with modern plumbing and electricity. Walshstone Park had been built in the early 1800s for a residence of a younger son and his family, though it had been used as a dowager house. While still a rather large house, it wasn’t a castle, and the cost to run it was two-thirds less than Henford Castle.

He hadn’t told the servants yet, mostly because he felt bad about letting most of them go. He planned to give them a good severance check and reference, considering he was downsizing considerably—Walshstone Park only needed a butler, housekeeper, two maids, a cook, two kitchen maids, a footman,  a valet, and lady’s maid, a measly ten compared to the several dozen that lived in Henford Castle. Byron didn’t plan on having a valet, and Stella had refused to hire a lady’s maid in England. He didn’t plan on keeping any of Thomas Walsh’s staff. 

He would still own most of the land, only selling the specific part of the land where the castle grounds sat. From the money of the castle’s sale, he’d decorate it to what he liked. He’d even thought about sending a telegram to Elspeth MacGregor, though she’d likely refuse to decorate the home of a duke, related by marriage or not. 

When he returned to Henford Castle, Caplan told him that the duchess had returned. He was shocked by the news, having not known when she was returning from New York. 

“Why didn’t you write and say you were returning?”

She shrugged. “I didn’t plan on returning this soon.”

“Soon? It’s been three months since I last saw you.”

“I wanted to see you.”

Her words were kind, but the tone of voice was not. She sounded bored, distant. Like she came because she had to. 

“...Well, I’m glad to see you.”

Even the sex was distant. She was there in body, but not in mind, and a creeping feeling began to slither into Byron’s mind: There was a reason why she was there, and it wasn’t a good one. 

“Caplan told me you gave your sister the London house,” she stated afterward. It was accusatory.

“So what? It was just sitting there gathering dust. You never used it.”

“It was our house.”

“It’s not now.” He swallowed. “I’m selling the castle too. We can’t afford to keep it running on the title’s wealth. And I doubt you want to put your money into it.”

She didn’t answer. 

“The smaller country house, Walshstone Park, is lovely. I’ve updated the electricity and plumbing, though the landscaping needs work. We’ll take a picnic there tomorrow.” He tried to sound gentle, but he couldn’t help the exasperation coming out of his voice. 

“Why’d you give the house to your sister?” She repeated, angrier. 

“Stella. It will be put to better use. Don’t be upset. I truly have missed you.”

Stella took a deep breath and frowned, looking away from him.

“I love you, darling,” he whispered, trying to smile.

She didn’t reply.