#stede bonnett

[umulata]

when i was asked to draw "a steddyhands lil kiss" i confidently went for the straight girl threeway lesbo kiss........

[rosamayarts]

something about the parallels between Stede's iconic 'passive aggression' scene that leads to the boat catching fire and sinking, and Calico Jack telling the story of when Ed set fire to a boat killing everyone onboard and using it as an example of how ruthless Blackbeard is. something about Ed being ashamed of his actions and distancing himself from them 'technically, I didn't kill those people, the fire did', while Stede just laughs at the chaos he creates. The show often takes the stance that vicious words can be just as brutal as physical violence, most obviously in the scene where Ed is appalled when he learns about passive aggression and calls it 'diabolical.' And I just love that Ed and Stede's relationship isn't as simple as 'edgelord x cinnamon roll.' Stede wouldn't be nearly as great a character if it wasn't for that darker side he has. I'd love to see more of it in season 2 fr

[create-chaos]

Fellow OFMD fans, how we doing on this fine* Thursday?

*Everything is fine. Absolutely fine, nothing is wrong whatsoever I'M FINE

[itspanzee]

WE GOT STEDE IN THE RED SHIRT YESSSS HE LOOKS SO GOOD IN THAT. THE V NECK OPENING? HE BETTER BE IN THAT THE REST OF THE EPISODE

[princessofdorkness]

neither alive nor dead but a secret third thing (at sea)

[avastyetwats]

The Pentleman Girate

Continued from here. @fxckin-blackbeard

Five glasses.

Five glasses of whiskey! Now that was something to be proud of, wasn't it?

...If Stede Bonnet had actually managed to drink five. That's what his impressive goal had been anyway, but he already hit the floor with just one drink in him. That was probably just as impressive because who is taken out by just one drink?

"The Pentleman Girate, Bede Stonnet. That's who!"

He hadn't meant to say that out loud.

In his defense the whiskey was strong and Stede had never really drank anything that strong before. In fact, he rarely drank at all, not even when he was still in Barbados. A drink or two here and there was fine, but becoming drunk? Wasted? Why, that was unbecoming. He lets out a scoff mixed laugh at the thought - or what was supposed to be a laugh anyway - because gods, aristocrats were ridiculous. He was glad to have left that life behind and peruse a life of dangerous adventure! Which included trying alcohol, something Stede always thought he'd be able to handle just fine, and hoped he would if at least to impress Ed, but alas... he did not handle it fine. He didn't handle it at all, really.

Because here he was on the floor with his arms out, claiming he was merely hugging the floor because... well, didn't everyone need a hug? Or everything at this point. "My ship is already floating, Ed. We're in it!" A friendly reminder, though not at all correct since they were in an unmoving and very grounded building that they were trying to turn into an inn. He feels Ed's hands on his body, lifting him up from the ground and Stede struggles to assist him. "It's not mmmade up! Luciusss told me. It means," He pauses as he walks with Ed towards the couch. He felt far more drunk on the floor than he did on his feet, probably because laying still made the entire room spin. He was fiiiiine. "It means..." He sighs in frustration before he snaps his fingers. "Before after everyone!" Then he hums. "No, wait..." He thinks again, grunting when he's sat on the couch. "Before... anyone else! That's the one." He beams. "And that's what you are, Ed. Before after everyone anyone else." He smiles so sweetly at him, his words meant to be loving, even if he completely butchered them.

"Funny that this is called a love seat, isn't it?" Now his voice sounds flirtatious, his grin matching, or trying to. "As though it were meant for us."

[jollysunflora]

#LOOOOOOOL

Galaxy brain idea for how Stede can continue to be just absolutely loaded in a modern AU: he kept asking his estranged father for thousands of dollars for conversion therapy and put it all into a savings account. Every few months for a couple years he'd just drop his dad a line and be like "hey 👋🏻 I'm still gay 😞🏳‍🌈🌈 maybe ten thousand more dollars will make me straight 🙏🏼" and his father fell for it every single time

[umulata]

A collection of OFMD chibies 🌸

You can commission your very own here on my ko-fi ✨

[candylovestheshield]

So we all know a captain can officiate a marriage and there’s a possibility that Stede might marry Pete and Lucius…but can 2 captains officiate their own marriage?

[hypermania]

i feel like there's been this trend lately of people being upset that a queer storyline isn't catering specifically to what they personally want out of queer storytelling and i find it utterly baffling. it's like people see one piece of media do it in a way that speaks to them and their experiences and then when any other story does it differently in any way whatsoever, they're disappointed and view it as a failing. and that's just silly to me. the reason different pieces of media are doing it differently is because they are different. being queer is not a one size fits all situation. there is a reason that these stories are being told differently and that's good. the cut away from colin hughes coming out was not the righteous fury that james flint needed was not the soft oh moment that stede bonnett needed was not the building realization and catharsis that nick nelson needed was not the monumental unburdening that castiel needed was not the quiet broken admission that chiron needed was not the loud acceptance and declarations that eric effiong need was not the–

[gaypirateslife4me]

He died doing what he loved - being annoyed at Stede and Ed.

Maybe after the Zaddy thing. Izzy was simply ready to die

[strangeauthor]

ok so lets pretend ofmd wasnt ran by zionists. the show is still about slave owners and stede fucking bonnett. its bad

[youngscoobsblog]

This show was truly one of a kind. Its one of the first shows I've watched maybe ever that doesn't include coming out, homophobia, or similar themes to create conflict, and still includes queer relationships. It is so hilarious and so heartfelt at the same time. And it's historical fiction about pirates that actually existed! (Highly recommend reading the Stede Bonnett wikipedia). I only watched this show a couple weeks ago but I am mourning with everyone else today about S3 not getting picked up. As a proud member of the LGBTQ+ community I am so extremely happy this show is out there and can't wait to see it pave the way for more shows about queer joy. All the fanart and support I've seen on here is really incredible! Love yall ❤️

[ellaenchanting]

Hypnovember 2023 Day 2: Brain Drain

I have committed Our Flag Means Death fanfiction! I am so sorry. Stede/Ed, Ed/Izzy, somehow happy poly and happy metamours making a lovely vee. Takes place in some AU season 2 where the last arc of the season never happened. Izzy is living his best happy masochist life.

Author knows fuck all about ships.

Izzy had gotten much more comfortable spending time with his shipmates since the Calypso's birthday incident.

There was nothing like a round of torture to bring a crew together, he thought.

Tonight the whole group had gathered in the galley under the ship, laughing and chatting long past when they usually went into their quarters for the evening. The sea had been calm that day and the mood was social. Everyone seemed quite relaxed.

Only two members were missing.

Oluwande looked up from his cuddle pile with Jim and Archie. He seemed to have read Izzy's mind. "Hey," he called out to the gathered group, "Has anyone seen the captains this evening?"

"No!" a few people responded.

"Thank God," snarked Black Pete. "Blackbeard...well Ed has been freaking me out. Yelled at me earlier about trimming the sails and you KNOW I keep them the trimmest, babe," he said to his partner Lucius.

"Yeah, he snarled at me when I told him 'hello' earlier," said Archie. "Like this!" She contorted her face into a frankly over-the-top grimace. "Made me nearly jump out of my skin. I may have heard him yell at some seagulls too? Or dolphins?"

Roach looked worried. "Neither captain has come down for dinner, yet," he said.

"Perhaps they are...occupied in the captain's quarters," speculated Izzy.

"Oh? Feeling left out, are you?" joked Frenchie, the little shit. Izzy tactfully ignored him.

Roach replied, still concerned. "Captain Stede will usually come down and request provisions in advance if they're having a long night alone," said Roach. "Thinks he's being sneaky, says they need extra energy 'for planning raids.'"

"My room is below theirs. Trust me, they've not been buggering today," piped up Wee John. "Unless they've learned to be much more quiet about it."

"Maybe they've gotten into a spat and someone's gotten pushed off the ship," spat Lucius. "That'll happen with him, you know."

"OK, that's enough," said Izzy, trying to regain control over the situation as everyone began to talk at once. "You're like gossipy fishwives, all of you. I'll go check on the captains. Make sure Bonnet's not running the ship into a cliff or something."

Izzy climbed up the stairs and started to look around the ship. Ed and Stede weren't in the captain's quarters (being quiet for once). There was no sign of them on the deck. He even craned his neck up to the bird's nest and checked. No captains there.

He finally spotted them at the back of the ship- on a little bit of the stern mostly hidden from view. They were both sitting facing out at the ocean. From a distance, Izzy could see Stede's arm was bent around Ed's shoulder, his hand occasionally reaching up to rock Ed's drooped head into slow, almost imperceptible little circles. Aside from the rocking, Ed's body was remarkably still. It was a huge change from the tense, coiled menace that Ed's frame had carried earlier in the day. Now, he looked almost like a puppet with his strings cut, only responding to Stede's guidance. His arms rested gently besides his legs, lax and pliant.

Izzy could hear Bonnett speaking in a low, soothing voice near Ed's ear but he was too far to make out any words.

Ed had mentioned mesmerism to Izzy before. It was one of the many upperclass daliances that Bonnet had introduced him to- one of those many trifling hobbies that Izzy would never begin to understand the appeal of. Izzy even knew that Bonnet had used his skills on Ed previously. His captain confided that Bonnett's fancy mesmerism routine had helped him find quiet during his not-infrequent emotional storms, that it evened out his seemingly uncontrollable highs and lows. In Izzy's mind, he had pictured the whole thing looking quite comical- Bonnett with wiggly fingers staring daggers into Ed's eyes (maybe with rays), Edward swooning and fainting away in response like a lady whose corset was too tight.

This was quieter than what he had pictured. Gentle. Intimate, even. As he looked over at the scene, he had the sudden feeling that perhaps he shouldn't intrude.

He began to walk away when Stede turned his head and look directly at him. Izzy froze for a moment, unsure what to do. Stede quietly waved him over to where the couple was sitting.

As Izzy approached, he began to get a closer look at Ed's face. His eyes were closed and his face relaxed. His chest slowly rose and fell with each breath. As he come closer, he noticed Ed's eyes were making little flickers underneath his eyelids like he was dreaming.

Izzy wondered what dreams were happening below those lids.

Ed's brows furrowed a bit as Izzy came closer, picking up the noise.

Stede stroked a reassuring hand through his hair. He spoke in his ear, this time loud enough so Izzy could hear: "Shhhhhhh sweetness. It's OK. Relax. You're not in charge right now, remember? Just rest."

Ed's expression immediately cleared. He let held breath with a sigh.

"Izzy's here," Stede continued. "He and I are going to have a chat for a bit. But you don't have to pay attention to that right now, ok? Just drift. Why don't you see how deep you can count yourself down for me while we talk? I'll be right here. I'll touch your leg when it's time for you to listen to me again, ok?"

Ed gave a slight, dreamy nod. His lips barely moved as he began to count silently.

Seemingly satisfied, Stede gestured for Izzy to sit and moved over closer to him.

Izzy sat down, still staring at Ed's lax face. Somehow that by itself was just fascinating. Ed seemed so vulnerable and bare right now. Izzy wasn't sure if he should feel honored or spooked.

"He had a bad day," Stede said gently, nodding over to their entranced boyfriend. "You know how he gets. He needed out of his head for a bit."

Izzy DID understand how Ed got- probably more than his dandyish captain ever would. Hopefully more that Stede ever would, he corrected himself. Ed had certainly told his other boyfriend at least a bit about the hurricane that had been his and Izzy's relationship in the past. When times were bad, they had only known how to take their energy out on each other. They bit and snarled and scratched at one another just to drown out all the noise inside. Izzy had always assumed Ed had NEEDED all of that- needed to hurt and make Izzy suffer the same way that Izzy needed to hurt and suffer for him. That's how they worked. That's who they were together.

Since arriving on the Revenge, though, Izzy had seen more and more of the hidden soft side of Blackbeard. The side that enjoyed fancy clothes and fine foods. The side that kissed Stede's cheek sweetly when he didn't think anyone else was looking. The side that, even now, sat loose and drifting and unguarded while his two boyfriends stayed by him and had a chat.

"Can he hear us?" Izzy asked Stede, curiously.

Stede smiled. "He can hear us, he's just..focused elsewhere right now. Mesmerism's not a magic spell, it's more like- a nice version of where Ed's brain goes when he's navigating. Or how he is when he's trying to sniff out a storm."

Izzy was familiar with his captain's tendency to tune everything out while trying to read the sea. He pictured the absolute, unshakeable concentration of his focused gaze. "Only with nice, clear skies?"

Stede nodded. "Only with nice clear skies." He looked fondly at Ed's dreaming face. "No rain. Nothing to worry about right now." He had dropped into a lighter, dreamy tone- and for a moment, Izzy wasn't sure if he was still speaking to Ed or Izzy or even somehow mesmerizing himself.

Izzy had seen many things in his travels. He once heard a street charlatan talk about mesmerism- saying mesmerism somehow balanced out a person's magnetic forces (y'know- whatever magnetic forces were). He wasn't one for all of Stede's little tricks but- he did understand about needing balance.

Izzy had initially misunderstood Ed's relationship to Stede. He worried that the gentleman pirate would make Ed weak. That he would seduce him away. That he would try to turn the great Blackbeard into one of Stede's fancy little gentleman friends. Izzy had been terrified there would be nothing left of the Ed that he loved after Stede was through.

But Ed was still Izzy's Ed, even now. He could still fight and outwit and outmaneuver anyone else on the sea. He would still protect his crew with all the fierceness of his notorious reputation. He and Izzy could still lose themselves in each other- in their old married couple bickering, in their fighting and fucking, in their indulgences of Ed's sadism and Izzy's corresponding masochism. It just- felt more controlled now. Izzy no longer wondered if Ed actually hated him or if he was just looking for someone convenient to break. He no longer worried that Blackbeard would maim him so badly that he couldn't look after the crew. Even when Ed hurt him now- and he WOULD still hurt him, Stede didn't magic that part away- Izzy was always rewarded with a kiss and some praise afterwards. "That's so good, Izzy. You did so well for me," he would say. Edward seemed so much stronger in these moments now- able to control his own fierceness and use it as a weapon- but also to hold Izzy as he fell apart for him.

Izzy looked over at Ed's quiet countenance- so different than before. It was otherworldy seeing him this serene and distant. He had a sudden desire to protect this version of Ed- Stede's gentle Ed. To keep him safe. A mad, possessive impulse made it to Izzy's mouth before he could stop it.

"Can I touch him?" he asked. "Like this?"

Stede looked surprised. "By touch, do you mean....?"

"His face, Bonnet" Izzy replied, snarkily. "Or his hand or something. His hair. Not going to wank him off on the deck, now am I?"

Stede bit back a laugh. He leaned over to gently touch Ed's leg.

Ed reacted with an almost imperceptible startle before gently settling- serene like the moon going back behind a cloud.

"Shhh- that's OK, love, you can stay relaxed. Good," Stede soothed. "Izzy was wondering if he could touch you while you're in trance. Would that be OK?"

Ed took a moment to respond, as though the words were reaching him from a great distance. Then he nodded his assent.

Stede smiled back at Izzy, reassuringly. Izzy took a breath- then reached over to slowly stroke Ed's hair.

His fearsome Blackbeard smiled in return to the gesture- giving a happy little murmur. He slightly leaned his head in. Just like an affectionate kitten, Izzy thought.

"Good," soothed Bonnet at Ed. "I bet that feels nice."

Izzy grinned too, feeling oddly proud to be trusted with this quiet moment. He and Ed had never been conventional. Maybe it was OK that Ed and Stede weren't either. Maybe it was ok that their relationships were so different- that they saw such different aspects of the same person.

Maybe it was all ok.

Maybe it all balanced.

They sat quietly for a long moment on the deck, letting the peace of the atmosphere soothe them.

Gradually Stede stirred. "Izzy- I forgot to ask: Did the men send you? Were they looking for us?"

"There's no emergency, they were just curious where you were," replied Izzy.

Stede nodded. "We should probably get back, then. Or at least get off deck. Love," he said, moving his voice back into that hypnotic tone. He touched Ed's leg to refocus him. "Are you ready to come up out of trance for me?"

Ed took a deep breath and nodded.

"Good, I'll count to 5 then. It's just to guide you- I know you know how to come up at your own pace. Bring back any of this peace and calm that you want with you, ok?"

Stede started counting- his voice slowly gaining energy as he reminded Ed to connect back with his body and helped him reorient to the ship. It all didn't seem particularly magical to Izzy- but then again he rarely tried to understand Bonnet's ways anyway. Ed finally blinked his eyes open when Stede reached 5.

He blinked a few more times, adjusting. Then, his gaze lost it's bleariness as he looked adoringly up at Stede.

"Hi, there," said Stede, smiling gently. "Back with us, love?"

"Mmmmph mostly," said Ed, scritching his beard and stretching to rouse himself. He looked over at Izzy as though reminding himself he was there and smiled. "Heya, Izz!" Ed leaned up to kiss him.

Izzy grinned into their kiss. "Heya, Captain. Didn't want to interrupt your little daydream session. Crew was just looking for you."

"Ah, we missed dinner!" exclaimed Stede. "I should have asked Roach for..."

"Provisions for planning raids, I heard," smirked Izzy. "Yes, we're all very snowed by your clever euphemisms."

"Fuck provisions, I could eat a horse," said Ed. He practically bounced up and put an arm around both of his boyfriends. "C'mon, let's get some grub!"

Helpless to his whims as always, both of his partners joyfully followed him to dinner.

Fanfic is new to me so would love some thoughts! Also this is unbeta'd so will love you forever if you would point out spelling/grammar mistakes or if there's unclear writing. I'm considering posting this to AO3 but- don't want to embarrass myself in front of the REAL fanfic writers, you know? Feedback welcomed!

Tagging @mentat101posts and @thekinkycocktailclub .If you want to be tagged in these, just lmk!

Tagging @darthkyra @linnybeenaughty @pearlqueensposts @thiskenisftm @deeperforme because they wanted OFMD hypnokink and I blame/thank you for the inspiration to actually get this down!

[gaypirateslife4me]

My ot3. My golden triad. My, my sweet-baby-angel murderers. My 'how much trauma can FJenkins fit into 3 souls - turns out a lot' trio.

[soulpunchftw]

UNCOMFORTABLE ADVANCE WARS RECAP

We got:

* Orange Star! Pew pew, ‘Murica! Just like in real life, they’re the main characters of everything. Our commanders include President Hot Aunt Vibes, Ash Ketchum with wrenches, Steroids Man, GI Jane, and a little old Japanese shop keeper for some reason.

* Blue Moon! Russia but without the unrelenting horror! So many vague communist aesthetics but without anything to show for it, you’d think it was the Democratic Socialists of America. Our commanders include Actual General Winter, Lazy Cowboy, and a rich nepotism baby who fights with human wave tactics (which might be the most Russian thing ever put in a game).

* Gold Comet! Imperial Japan but now with 100% fewer blood-curdling war crimes! Originally called ‘Yellow Comet,’ but someone at Nintendo finally realized that this was a REALLY questionable thing to call an Asian country. Our commanders include an emperor who proves that it’s possible to be both Japanese AND a weeb, the only intelligent person in the entire series, and Grandpa ‘Nam Veteran.

* Green Earth! Slutty Eurotrash with tanks! Very insistent that nothing whatsoever happened between 1933 and 1945, thank you very much. Our commanders include Blitzkrieg Bishonen, the lovechild of Stede Bonnett and Jimmy Buffett, and tank lesbian.

* Black Hole! They’re the Bad Guys! They appear to be aliens, Nazis, and/or Hot Topic mall goths- but their similarities to the people of New Hampshire end there. They’re here to conquer the planet, despoil the environment, and make angry YouTube videos complaining about ’forced diversity.’ Commanders include Literally Darth Hitler, the obligatory dumb brute that every bad guy squad is required to hire thanks to Affirmative Action, Ebony Dark'ness Dementia Raven Way, a sexier Marilyn Manson, and Scar Fullmetal Alchemist.

Dual Strike, which is (honestly thankfully) not included in the remake, also adds the following commanders: Nuclear Nepotism, a white boy trying to become a rapper, another rich communist, Kamikaze Wario, Don fucking Quixote, meme robot, hobbit ninja, Karen, and Somehow Palpatine Has Returned