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leupagus · 5 months

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Selyse is not a "who's this bitch" kind of person but honestly, she should be forgiven for meeting Sansa like this and going "who's this bitch"

Just then there was a call from outside the tent, asking for the king. Davos opened the flap and a young solder ducked inside, bowing low to the king first, then to Lady Melisandre, then to Selyse. "Your Grace," he said, "riders were just spotted on the pass below, making their way up to our camp."

"Spotted on the pass?" snorted Davos. "Are they riding snow bears? Or elks?"

As though in answer, an horn sounded in the distance. The king started, his expression as queer as any Selyse had seen on his face in their near twenty years of marriage. It seemed almost...hopeful. "That call," he said, as though to himself.

Davos shook his head. "I don't recognize it, Your Grace. Do you?"

"Oh, yes," said Stannis softly. "I remember it very well."

The party climbing up the pass was small — a hundred men at most — in two long rows, the banners of all of Stark's promised houses unfurled. They were mounted on the great lumbering beasts that passed for horses in the North. In the pearl-grey of dawn, Selyse could see the front pair dragging behind them a curious leather-and plate device. It was shaped for all the world like the prow of a ship and it cut through the snow with ease. The party moved only slightly slower than a full canter; even as she watched, the two horses affixed to the contraption slowed and stopped, their riders giving them full rein to blow out great puffs of air into the snow. The whole party halted in an orderly queue behind them, and the two mounted soldiers directly behind circled round to unhook the lead pair (without bothering to dismount) and attaching their own horses. The party then resumed its swift pace up the mountain pass. The two who had been in the lead rejoined smoothly at the end, where the snow been packed down to a tidy path.

"Ingenious," remarked Davos. Lady Melisandre said nothing, only quirked an eyebrow. Shireen asked some imbecilic question about something, and the king made a patient response.

"Perhaps these men of the North will bring you the miracle you seek, Your Grace," said Lady Melisandre, as the riders at last drew level.

"Certainly they seem to have performed the miracle of moving in this snow," Stannis observed.

Most of the riders remained at the foot of the camp, but a small group began to make their way toward them, their behemoth horses even more ridiculous as they drew closer, with their hoofs near as wide as platters and their tails cut short as a broomstick. As they halted before their king, the riders dismounted. Despite the bitter cold, not one of them showed any sign of discomfort, their thick boots and cloaks making them appear almost as outsized as their horses.

The king took a breath, as if to ask for their leader, when a hooded figure on a great chestnut beast came out from the midst of them. Her cloak and skirts were dirty from the road and snows, her copper-bright hair in a simple peasant's braid as she pushed back her hood. A half-dozen young men surged forward to hand her from her horse, but it was a giantess in armor who helped her down and followed closely behind as she approached them.

It took Selyse a long moment to realize who the girl was: Sansa, Catelyn's eldest daughter. (Eldest child, now that the usurper Robb Stark was dead — and Catelyn too, and Lord Stark before them.) She had more of her mother's look to her than her father's, which must have pleased the Imp when he married her; Tyrion had always liked his whores pretty and clever. There was something in the way that she carried herself, however, that made Selyse suspect Sansa might be rather too clever.

The girl made no move to bow to the king, merely drew within a length as her retinue fanned out behind her. "Your Grace," she greeted Stannis. At least she had the good sense to recognize her rightful king. "I am Lady Sansa, of House Stark."

"Lady Stark," the king replied, or began to, because at that moment the damned direwolf, that unnatural creature the Lord Commander had foisted upon them, came hurtling in from wherever the devils he'd been and lunged for the girl, sending her sprawling to the ground with a scream more chilling than Shireen's, horrifyingly cut off as she—

As she laughed, the creature licking frantically at her face with its great tail wagging. The girl brought her arms around its monstrous neck and hugged it closer to her, burying her face in its fur, unconcerned entirely by the spectacle. Her Northern lords looked well pleased, in fact, nodding and smiling at one another in shared understanding. He'll recognize her, Jon had told Shireen when she'd asked how Ghost would know who Sansa was. The pack knows its own. It seemed the whole of the North knew.

The king's people were nearly as susceptible. Davos was smiling like a dolt and Shireen looked as though she wanted nothing more than to join in the undignified affair. Lady Melisandre, at least, showed little sign of being moved; she was watching with an air of interest but no warmth. Only the king was truly inscrutable, as he stared down at the tangle of girl and dog with another expression she had never seen before. This time, she could not guess as to what it meant.

At long last, the beast allowed Sansa Stark to rise, once again accepting help only from her giantess. "My apologies, Your Grace," she said. Her smile was broad and bright even as she wiped at a streak of mud across her nose. "But as you might guess, Stark reunions are rare these days."

#if anybody in Stannis's retinue is thinking 'who's this bitch'#let's be real: it's probably Stannis #I'm just saying #also did I spend way too much time researching into how people got through the snow in ye oldene dayes? MAYBE #and for anyone worried: Shireen's scream is from a nightmare she had SHE IS FINE #in fact spoiler alert: none of the kids die in this fic #that's right I looked at Shireen and Tommen and Myrcella and Ned Umber and Lyanna Mormont and were like: u lived bitch #game of thrones motherfuckers #got: bitches get stuff done

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oops-its-a-fanwork · 9 months

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Bountyhunter/Thief reader x the Pirates ☆

Based on the pirate au by @mega-punani, check out her stuff if you enjoy this! They are currently not creating content for it but what is there is really lovely :3

Reader is trying to catch the crew for their bounty! Or at the very least, get some of their fabled treasures for themselves. Your specialities are thievery and catching people or crews alive, which usually yields more bounty anyway. Not to mention that if you can get people to talk, they may reveal more valuable information, items or treasures. Your skills are becoming pretty well known around te area, and that reputation will grow even bigger when you finally catch one of the big dogs~

Yeah thats right, the Skull Pirates' ship just docked nearby! A perfect opportunity. You realize it would be easier to pick them off one by one (fighting the entire crew is obviously a Bad Time) but oops the first one you picked is like kinda cute actually?? Wait scratch that you're here for the money! ...even if they have some redeeming qualities that make them not that bad and- hey wait when did you end up on their team?

Sans It takes him such a long time to wake up from the knock-out that you are frustrated before he even starts talking. After that it really doesn't help that he starts talking to you as if you were buddies chatting during break instead of, I don't know, a hostage situation?? You press a knife to his neck to shut him up but he just keeps talking, telling you he thinks you'll like some of the edgier types on his crew and making puns about sharp edges and this not being very knife of you, chill as ever. When a loud bang rings through the air and your hideout shakes, he breaks the news: his team is getting him back right now and he has decided you are joining the crew. He thinks you're cute and you've got skills if you can manage to knock out and kidnap someone like him. You know you don't stand a chance against his entire crew so begrudgingly you join, letting your displeasure be known every single step of the way. Even if they start to grow on you rather quickly. The crew is confused and amused about your arrival but they at least tolerate you due to you being introduced by Sans.

Papyrus You tried to lure him into following you with flattery, talking about his interests and even sharing gossip from the village. Asking him to assist you with something was far too easy and he seemed happy to help, stating that he would let his brother know where he was going just in case! He's been told there's some sketchy folk around ;) Before you can stop him he's marched off. You mentally debate on simply leaving now before deciding against it. When he returns he lets you know that his brother is excited to meet you! You are pretty much carried aboard by the pirate before you can even object, where a few curious crewmembers give you a quick nod before continuing their tasks. Shit, now half of the ship knows your face, your surprise attack is ruined! When Papyrus sees you pout he immediately makes it his mission to cheer you up again: he showers you in compliments, shows you every nook and cranny of the ship since you seem so interested in it and he encourages you to talk about your home some more. In the chaos of Papyrus's boundless energy he manages to introduce you to Sans and ask if you can join the crew ('Wait wha-'). Sans agrees easily ('No seriously wait-'), recognizing you from a wanted poster and knowing that keeping an eye on you is far easier like this. Not to mention that he can clearly see that his brother really likes you and that he is already winning you over bit by bit. Welcome to the crew kiddo.

Blue He's clearly trying to impress you. You can use that. He's another one you tried to lure with talking, but he was too stubborn to lure with flattery alone so you used the next best thing: a bet. Feigning innocence as a random townsperson simply curious about the new faces resembling the famous Skull crew, you challenged his abilities. Surely they can't be all people crack them up to be? If you lost, you would tell them more about that lost treasure your town has rumors about, and you would accept that he is simply amazing. If you won, he would help you carry those heavy groceries of yours to your home to make up for the lost time. You knew he was strong so you expected to lose. You were hoping to be introduced as an innocent citizen so the crew won't be suspicious if you show up again to snoop around. Maybe the cutie fool can even vouch for you! Worst case scenario you can get him alone in your hideout and knock him out, then get the information you need by force. Either way, you were getting a good deal out of this. Aaaah bummer, you lost~ Guess you'll give his crew any intel you have! Feeling accomplished, you let him lead you to the ship... where he promptly introduced you to the others as the famous bounty hunter they had been hearing so much about. He knew all along???

Stretch He woke up to the sound of someone softly playing some notes on his banjo, his hands and feet tied. He was too tired and hazy to think too much, but looking a little to his right, he saw you softly inspecting his beloved instrument: gentle touches over the wood, fingers following the pretty carvings along the handle. Soft notes filled the room when you'd pluck the strings gently, listening to the notes intently as you waited for him to wake up. You could've been a siren with how entranced he was... until you snapped him out of it by looking up to him with a mischievous, self assured smile, putting the banjo aside and moving far too close to him. Oh boy. When he was inevitably rescued by his brother, you escaped quickly through a window with a smile and a wink his way, intensifying his orange blush as he looked away. You still follow them around, looking to get some riches here or there. Whenever you encounter each other he can never look you in the eye, a rush of magic spreading across his face, which only makes the chase more fun for you. Eventually the crew outvotes him on trying to get you on board, and he really doesn't make too much of a fuss about it. At this point everyone just wants to see how this turns out between you two. (including him.)

Red Just because you flirted with him when trying to get him alone, doesn't mean he gets to keep flirting when he wakes up!! Every part of you gets complimented, every conversation topic gets turned into a pickup line, and every time you threaten him he tells you he's into that shit. You didn't even know skeletons had... eyebrows?? brow-bones?? but he keeps waggling them at you every time you try to get to the point. It's absolutely infuriating! Annoying! Revolting even! (so stop blushing!!) You are this close to hitting him in the face but he'll probably make a flirt out of that too. When his brother shows up to rescue collect him, you pretty much just shove Red at him and tell them both to get lost. Now every time you encounter each other he drops everything to flirt with you and to convince you to join them, even mid-fight. The crew knows about the whole thing too so you don't have the element of surprise anymore. God damn it.

Edge BITES YOU BITES YOU BITES YOU BITES YOU BITES YOU- No but seriously he is pissed. You had jumped him from up high before he could set any traps to protect the ship's anchoring point! He would be even more pissed to be rescued by his crewmates, hoping to bust out by himself at least, or preferably even return without anyone knowing what had happened at all. Instead, you riled him up into talking, stole his keys and fled the little hideout to steal some of their treasure. Since most of the crew was looking for him on the shore you actually managed to steal some gems, but you were eventually cornered a few days later. He actually kinda respects your skills, he's just very butthurt to have been your first victim as the crew teases him for it a lot. In an act of reconciliation you prank the others and capture/'torture' them if any of them do something stupid or rude, showing everyone it's your skills that did him in and that he was no fool for falling prey to them. Although he nags about it to both them and you, he very quickly realizes that you are helping him keep the crew in check when they do dumb shit and you both reconnect from there. Now you're a terrifying couple to do stupid things around and you have quite the reputation. You both enjoy that a lot.

Razz You are confusing him with the way you act. You flatter him by calling him the most dangerous one there, saying how much research you had to do due to his reputation, telling him just how difficult it was to get some seastone to keep his powers in check... and you've stolen one of his maps too!! He is livid, seething, but keeps getting caught off guard by the flirtatious ways you address him. By the end of the day he's exhausted by the constant emotional whiplash you've been creating. When the crew comes for him you've already fled, leaving him tied to his chair. (insulting!!!) You sold his map for good money, which is how they tracked you down as he immediately recognises his own detailed work. You besting a guy like him made a good part of the crew curious about you though so now you are cautiously accepted in the group. Razz always brags about the quality of his maps to you and you tease him by telling him you'll steal them and sell them for a lot. Somehow, this has become the way you communicate. The higher a prize you name for a map, the higher its quality (and the more he blushes). When you're mad at him you tell him they won't sell cuz they look shitty. It's raining those days.

Cash He looked so tired and lanky that you hadn't realized he was part of the famed skeleton crew until you almost walked past him. It seems you surprised both yourself and him when you swiftly turned around and knocked him on the head, dragging him to your nearby hideout. Good thing you were always prepared for anything! And that no-one was watching. Now that he's awake, he's... far to meek. Almost a little smug, actually. You are suspicious of him, but he can't really do anything shackled up like this. Cash found himself in a really fun situation upon waking up: a good looking person standing over him, clearly ready to write things down in a little notebook and threatening him with the cutest little pocket knife he has ever seen. You remind him of his brother just a little bit... Welp, that does it. He's going to bully you into joining, this is too funny to pass up! Good thing he had impulsively stolen the keys from you before getting knocked out. Cash took you by surprise and carried you onto the ship, introducing you to everybody. He will never stop being a smug idiot about that story either.

Bear He's just sitting there, red eye on you and face blue. Maybe you shouldn't have come so close to threaten him, because as soon as you entered his personal space he completely spaced out. Fuck, did you get the mute one? How can you get information out of him like this! He's not holding anything of value either... maybe you can hand him in alone? It would ruin your beautiful complete-crew-cleanup-plan though... While you are contemplating just what to do with this guy, Bear is contemplating a few things himself: you're clearly not the most buff person, having relied on a sneak attack and the binds to keep him at bay. You were working on your own, which in a place like this likely meant you didn't have any close friends or family or you would've been in their gang instead. You also clearly didn't give a shit about his size, intimidating looks or injury, and while those thoughts made his face warm, it also meant you clearly had no sense of self preservation. Guess he has to take things into his own hands. He takes you by surprise by breaking the chair he was seated on, thus giving him enough space to remove his binds, and simply picking you up and taking you with him. He and the crew will take care of you from now on.

Cinnamon Ok you feel bad. He pretty much stumbled into your arms, apologizing profusely, called you pretty while looking up at you from within your arms and then apologized for the out of the blue statement in a whirlwind of stutters and sorrys. When after a second you recognised him from the wanted posters you knocked him over the head and he was out. You weren't even really hunting for the crew that day to be honest, just taking a stroll through the town for groceries. Now he's awake and stuttering so much you're not getting anything interesting out of him. You got close to his face to interrogate him properly and he almost passed out again. You end up dumping an awake him unceremoniously into his brother's lap, and now they know about you and are hunting you to be on their team instead. Sigh.

#sans x reader #papyrus x reader #pirate au #papyrus au #sans au #homemade fanworks #undertale au #Bear voice: so you are lonely fragile and stupid. Well guess what we are adopting you you'd fit right in.#Also my face feels warm when I see you. In order to fix this I will feed you soup. Perhaps a stew.#and Cinnamon is simping so hard the crew needs to try and get you on their team so he'll stop being distracted all the time.#Spoiler alert: it does not make him less distracted when u join lol

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