#spoccoy

[sshbpodcast]

Episode 28: As Heard On The Internet

TOS: "The Ultimate Computer" and "Bread and Circuses"

It's the SSHB Podcast! It doesn't slice, dice, or julienne fries, but you can certainly set it and listen to it! I can't legally say we're brought to you by RonCo, but we might as well be this episode. It's a week of invention as Doctor Daystrom brings "The Ultimate Computer" around to the Starfleet science fair, and Ames invents a scenario for some "Bread and Circuses" fanfic.

Also this week: M5's boners and a little eye candy for the ladies, for once.

Content warning: I'm starting to realize TOS has a lot of uncomfortable sexual situations from the number of times I've had to write these. There's a scene with, AGAIN, some really unfortunate consent issues that leads to a (super) brief discussion of rape.

Timestamps: synopses: 1:35; The Ultimate Computer: 17:14; Bread and Circuses: 43:35

[lovelywaterbuffaloes]

I love you ain’t that the worst thing you ever heard?

[prince-just-prince]

[gayspock]

SEARCH FOR SPOCK LETS GO GO GO GO

- ARE YOU KIDDING ME?

YOU OPEN WITH THIS SHUT UP THE WOUND IS STILL SO RAW I CANT TAKE IT

- IT BEING ALL WASHED IN BLUE AND SLOWLY COMING INTO COLOUR AS JAMES RECOUNTS HIS PARITNG SPEECH TO SPOCK ENOUGH I AM 21 YEARS OLD NOW YOU CANNOT REDUCE ME LIKE THIS IM GOING TO HAVE A FUCKIGN MOMENT

- sincerely i think im just too emotional today i truly am i have been for a while and i knew i was going to be rough today hence why im watching this (to cope) and yet despite knowing this im like screaming at myself for tearing up at the title sequence girl literally get a grip!

- you’re telling me im incapable of coping also, kirk, im going to lose my mind here

- “we paid with our dearest blood” he rellalty is dear isnt he. spock come back im sick of it. 

- big fan of this butt ugly alien dog that keeps snarling and looks so so bad but what a good boy. what a good puppy. mwah!

- AND IF MY GRANDMOTHER HAD WHEELS, SHE’D BE A BIKE!

- everyone obsessed with spock’s death yeah we all are, kirk, im fucking going cazy im losing my mind and i know the man isnt even dead and whoevers in his god damn quarters . GOD.

- also chekov just randomly speaking russian to scotty and scotty beinglike “what” and chekov doing it again me too

- bones is bones okay my king bones are you literally okay

-  i have been thinking for a while as i am one to do and i dont know ive always wanted a tattoo and stay with me here im thinking if i ever want one i have to sit with the idea for at least 2 years (since if i were to get one, i’d have to sit with it longer for that) and all these shots of the enterprise.... well. im being convinced moreso every day. no im not kidding this shit has rotted my brain severely

- sincerely though this has been the most ive felt in a while and god i love little liveblogs my little admission here i just like to feel a little less lonely watching movies dont you girlies

- are david and saavik going to be a thing. i think thats cute honestly bless their hearts. also kirk boys have a type i guess

- THE LOOKS THEYRE ALL BRINGIGOIDJGISJFHSJFHJSHJSHHGD. KIRK THE OUTFIT LOOKS LIKE IT SELLS FOR AN ARM AND A LEG ON DEPOP.  sulu im also like alarmed i love sulu’s outfit personally like king shit. BUT KIRK. LIKE I MEAN, YOUR PERFORMANCE WAS FINE, SHATNER: I BELIVED, FULLY, THAT KIRK WAS HAVING A MIDLIFE CRISIS. BUT ALL OF THAT PALES IN COMPARISON TO THIS OUTFIT. YOU COULD HAVE JUST ROCKED IN WEARING THIS, DAY 1, AND I WOULD BE LIKE AHA YUP MAN’S LOST  IT

- SAREK?

- KIRK, YOU BOYFRIEND’S DAD CAME TO FUCKING YELL AT YOU. HOW IS IT GOING MAN.

- this scene . . okay . okay (breathes) no offence but sarek getting kirk to relive it all and kirk almost crying and whispering no. now hang on girls.  (starts pacing around)

- NOT to unpack but sarek assuming that spock, rightfully, entrusted everything he was and everything he knew with kirk’s mind... that in his dying moments, spock would give it all to kirk.... okay. hang on. fuck off.

- “what you ask is difficult” kirk dont give me that horseshit and pretend like you’re dragging your feet, here. dont act coy. we know DAMN well the number of times and the amount of bullshit you’ve done to save both spock and bones and what they both have also done

“but if spock has an eternal soul, then it is my responsibility.” “yours?” “as surely as if it were my very own” LITERALLY OKAY THEN!

- AGAIN WITH THE OUTFITS. JIM WHAT YOU’RE WEARING IS SO CLOSE TO BEING OKAY BUT ITS ATROCIOUS. MEANWHILE IM A LITTLE OBSESSED, PERSONALLY, WITH CHEKOV AND SULU’S MATCHING LEATHER NUMBERS. GENTLEMEN. (NODS POLITELY... RESPECTFULLY)

- personally im actually all for mccoy/spock hybrid going to a bar .

- no hang on NO IM OBSESSED WITH THE MCCOY/SPOCK FUSION NONSENSE. “WHERE’S THE LOGIC IN OFFERING ME A RIDE HOME, IDIOT?” THAT’S PIRCELES TO ME. ABSOLUTELY PRICELESS.

- people say this about me in both the gay way and the mentally ill way and well that’s also the same with spoccoy (which is what im lovingly calling the fucked up trifle their brain is right now)  so well

- has.

- has star trek sworn before this?

- not sure why but this took me out in that sense LIKE DID MCCOY EVER SAY BITCH BEFORE THIS. AM I LOSING IT. AM I. SINCERELY. BECAUSE IT TOOK ME OUT. BITCH? BITCH? MCCOY, DID YOU JUST CALL SPOCK A BITCH?

- here’s the thing stay with me here . there are so, so few characters i headcanon as specifically not-gay do you know what i mean. and even now i say this that as a JOKE, and not really seriously: because the only reason why im here for straight sulu, is because i think it’s very funny to imagine tos sulu as straight, given how they specifically made him gay in aos and george takei was like “i sincerely wish you didnt.” like i do find that very funny. personally. but all of that being said, i reiterate i say that mostly in jest because right now... sulu, the outfit. the vibes. so immaculate. unparalleled.

[hurt-spock]

SpocCoy

[depressedkakashihatake]

Leonard returning from vacation on earth with a bright blue strip of hair on his head. Bright enough that it sticks out to everyone and they can all that that it is very much there and not his standard brown hair.

    Nyota bugging Leonard about this blue strand of hair because absolutely no one figured this is something he would do, not even Jim and Nyota two of his best friends.

   Hikaru high fiving him because it looks awesome and Leonard looks genuinely happy with himself for getting the dye job. He can’t wait to see if Leonard keeps it blue and decides to switch colours, because the way he talks he’s excited about trying out all of the new styles.

      Pavlov and Scotty not knowing what exactly to say when they see Leonard’s hair and realize that the gossip is true. That he actually did this. They don’t know how to process the usually gruff doctor looking so proud of himself.

   Jim laughing his ass off because he dared Leonard to do something like this while they were in the academy and god damn it took years but he finally did it. He actually dyed his hair. 

    But Spock, Spock easily has the best response to it. Spock, who Leonard is expecting to get a lecture from about professionalism (ya, that’s still a problem with the Vulcan’s who don’t like this human trend of dying their hair) and an order to fix his hair. Spock who keeps his distance for a total of two days before walking right up to Leonard in Medical and being unable to stop him from kissing that stupid smirk off of his face. Spock, who didn’t realize that Leonard would look so damn good with something as stupid as a blue strand of hair. A blue strand that matches the blue in his uniform. that looks ridiculous and gorgeous at the same time.

    Leonard definitely loves his new hair even more than he did before, especially when he gets to watch Spock walking out of his bedroom the next morning. He thinks he'll keep the blue