#spencer reid character study
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imagining-in-the-margins · 2 years ago
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Autistic Spencer Reid
Happy Autism Acceptance Month, everyone! By request, my wonderful friends and I have taken on the daunting task of documenting the reasons why Spencer Reid is considered Autistic. Big thank you to you @spencer-reids-adventures and @foxy-eva specifically for their help. We hope everyone enjoys! This is not an exhaustive list.
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Stimming/Self-Stimulatory behavior, including rocking/spinning in his chair, twiddling with his fingers, gripping sheets, bouncing his legs, biting his lip/tongue, rubbing his eyes, spinning pens, pacing (e.g., S6E12 "Corazon")
Averse to touch, dislikes hugs (S7E13 "Snake Eyes" & S11E11 "Entropy")
Explains multiple attempts at masking, including "being more conversational," (S2E19 "Ashes and Dust"), scripting conversation (S15E4 "Saturdays"), saying what people want to hear (S6E20 "Hanley Waters")
Verbosity - Difficulty recognizing when he's talking too much/speaking at inappropriate times (e.g., S1E16 "The Tribe" & S10E16 "Lockdown")
Began studying behavioral science to understand behavior that made him frustrated/confused (S11E22 "The Storm")
Averse to hosting/hanging out in his space; didn't invite his friends to his apartment for over 15 years (S15E9 "Face Off")
The only team member capable of proficient communication with other Autistic people (S6E16 "Coda" & S11E22 "The Storm")
He is referred to as Autistic by multiple characters, including a literal profiler, and does not deny or question it (S1E5 "Broken Mirror" & S8E3 "Through the Looking Glass")
Lack of social awareness, such as focusing on a convention while at a workplace shooter crime scene (S7E3 "Dorado Falls")
Various special interests, like Doctor Who (S6E16 "Coda" & S7E23 "Hit")
Literal thinking, such as focusing on scientific accuracy of a star-based fable (S5E13 "Risky Business")
Difficulty recognizing common phrases, such as the "sitting in a tree" song (S3E14 "Damaged") or jokes (S7E9 "Self-Fulfilling Prophecy" & S1E8 "Natural Born Killer")
Makes inappropriate references, such as to Derek's playboy behavior (S1E18 "Somebody's Watching") and Rossi's age (S7E13 "Snake Eyes")
Coordination/Spatial deficits (S1E17 "A Real Rain" & S8E6 "The Apprenticeship")
Hyperfocuses on a task to the point he doesn't notice his surroundings (S5E20 "A Thousand Words")
Unusual/hyper-specific pedantic language (S3E6 "Remembrance of Things Past")
Resistance to change, manifested as a luddite dislike of technology (S6E7 "Middle Man" & S8E4 "God Complex") and struggling with Gideon's death (S10E14 "Hero Worship")
He receives (apparent disability) accommodations to be in the field (S6E10 "What Happens At Home...")
Introverted, difficulty sharing emotions, even with his closest friends (S10E13 "Nelson's Sparrow")
Heavily bullied as a child (S3E16 "Elephant's Memory")
Difficulty making friends (S2E1 "The Fisher King Part 2")
Trouble with eye contact, which persists throughout the series
His mother is schizophrenic, which has a strong genetic link to Autism
Dislikes small talk (S8E3 “Through the Looking Glass”)
Enjoys memorizing lists (S7E11, “True Genius”)
Savant skills - eidetic memory and hyperlexia
Matthew Gray Gubler has also explained that, regardless of the canonical confirmation, he views and portrayed Spencer Reid as Autistic. Specifically, he stated:
"He's an eccentric genius, with hints of schizophrenia and minor autism, Asperger's syndrome. Reid is 24, 25 years old with three Ph.D.'s and one can't usually achieve that without some form of autism." (Note: Asperger's is an outdated term with Nazi origins, which is now referred to as a part of "Autism Spectrum Disorder" by most countries)
DISCLAIMER: I am Autistic, as diagnosed when I was a toddler. These thoughts are my own and shared for fun. If you disagree, please make your own post about it rather than posting them here. This was a labor of love for fans like me and those who love Autistic people and the characters like us. Thank you for respecting and understanding my boundaries!
Looking for more to read? Check out my Autistic headcanon posts for Penelope and Hotch!
Thank you everyone! 🌈♾️❤️
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snarkylinda · 1 year ago
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Relating to the last reblog- kind of obsessed over how Spencer and Derek have a very particular way to hug that is reserved for each other. Like the way Spencer puts his arms around his waist to be as close as humanly possible, when it last long enough even going as far as burying his whole face on Derek's shoulder and the way Derek grabs the back of his head/neck to keep him in place ugh I love them 😔😔
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caladeniablue · 7 months ago
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One Genius Is Enough
Sometimes, Rossi wonders about the intelligence of two of his co-workers.
An AO3 fanfic, because I seem to have fallen into the very large hole that is Criminal Minds.
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softestqueeen · 3 months ago
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pretty when i cry
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pairing: spencer reid x reader
summary: When Spencer returns home he gets immediately worried when he sees you bawling your eyes out. Little does he know, it’s just because of a book.
warnings: inaccurate facts (I made that all up, sorry not sorry) fluffy fluff, comforting, crying
wordcount: 514 words
a/n: i think criminal minds is my new addiction. he’s such a loser I need him. enjoy <3
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When Spencer returns from a case that took way too long to solve and kept him away from you for too long, he is greeted with the sight of the one thing he despises the most: the sight of you crying.
He drops his bag and slips out of his shoes before joining you in the living room. You were currently rolled up on the couch with a book in your hand and a soft blanket covering your silently crying form.
“Hey, I’m home. Is everything alright?” Spencer asked unsure of what else to say. You haven’t noticed him yet and almost had a heart attack when you saw him standing there.
When you did notice him though and when he asked if you were alright in that soft voice that was already so much comfort to you, you could only answer with a silent no before you start to sob. Your boyfriend doesn’t hesitate to take you into his arms, sitting down on the couch next to you. He pulls you closer and strokes your hair.
“What’s wrong, huh? Are you alright, what happened?” no matter how soft his voice was he couldn’t hide how concerned he was. Were you hurt? Did he do anything wrong? Has anything happened while he was gone?
His soft words calmed you down enough to get at least a few words out. “It’s just in this book I’m reading one of the characters dies for no reason and she was so nice and I just-“ your voice breaks up as another sob recks your body.
Spencer was relieved to hear that you were only in distress because of the book you were reading, that he now gently took from your shaking hands to put it on the desk next to the sofa. He then immediately goes back to soothing you.
“I’m so sorry, baby. But it’s only a book, it’s alright. Did you know that there are multiple studies about the emotional reaction of people when reading books? It’s actually quite interesting how people get so lost in a story that it affects them to such matters. When being presented with a sad scene, more than 70% of all participants showed a physical reaction and over 50% even started crying. It’s completely normal to feel sad about this. But don’t worry, I got you.”
You loved hearing him ramble, no matter what he was talking about. While concentrating on what he was saying, you could feel your breathing getting even again and your tears slowly coming to stop.
Turning around in Spencer’s embrace, you wrapped your arms around his neck, while his adjusted themselves on your waist. You were both contempt to bask in the comforting silence and Spencer was glad that he could calm you down a bit. Still, he decides to further distract you.
“What’s the book about?”
You lean back to look into his eyes, before a smile forms on your lips and you start to tell him in detail about the contents of your book.
He was just glad you were smiling again.
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a/n: i hope you liked this, if so please leave some notes, likes, reblogs and comments! feedback is very appreciated!
please also consider supporting my ao3: @ softestqueen
requests open!
taglist: @silvermagnolias @milywatermelon @BigBananaa
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mrs-weasley-reid · 5 months ago
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TEN'S A GOOD NUMBER
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Aaron Hotchner x psychiatrist!reader
Sypnosis: After Aaron's traumatizing encounter with Peter Lewis, he's sent to you, but who knew a profiler is the worst patient you'll ever have? Warning: enemies to lovers— ish(?) angst. a dash of fluff. light mentions of death and trauma. a few curses. went ballistic— it's lengthy, so pace yourself. A/N: loosely follows Mr. Scratch timeline for three seasons.
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Monday, May 4, 8:34 AM
Aaron Hotchner sits across from you.
He studies you in every detail like he's about to take an exam, and you're the topic.
The weight of your scribbles—light, almost featherlike. Ink leaves a soft trail of words, a map of your thoughts, your perception of him.
The speed of your hand. Swift and elegant. Each movement portrays a scene in a movie. As if they're telling a quiet story, your story he is yet to unravel.
The way you deprive him of eye contact.
What are you hiding?
Why can't you look him in the eye?
The occasional nod to remind him that you're listening—not like anything's coming out from his end.
In conclusion, just about everything you do, really.
To Aaron, you're a cheat sheet. His way back to the field, to work—the part of his life that cannot be halted despite the need for a break.
"Your hand is heavier," Aaron vaguely goads.
You silently stare at him, waiting for the rest of his thoughts to spill out of his mouth.
"Usually, you write like you're afraid to puncture the paper, but just right now, your strikes are deeper. Your grip on your pen is also tighter. Am I annoying you?"
Creative.
You think to yourself as he rakes his eyes down the canvas of your face, blank and land of nothing but mirroring eyes.
Although you prefer Aaron's comment about your new lipstick and how it makes your skin glow—something about your prospect of finding a lover—fifteen minutes into your session. You didn't peg him as a man who knows his lipstick shades, but you stand corrected as he says coral with the utmost confidence for a man who wears his tie like a choker.
Aaron does it all the time. Every five minutes, he says one thing he's noticed about you and then proceeds to zip his mouth, denying you details about him like you're some hired criminal paid to torture the King's hidden fortune out of him.
And as per your entertainment, you'd do something out of your character to throw him off. If you can laugh at his gullibility, you would.
His goal is to intimidate you. Pressure you. Make you tick like every other serial killer he's encountered. Because he'd really rather be across an unsub than you. Aaron would rather be the one to ask questions and not you. In his eyes, you're no better than a small-town detective ignorantly interrogating a serial killer for a cheap gas station robbery, unaware of the skeletons in his closet.
At this moment, Aaron ponders why he agreed to meet with you once a week only to sit in almost absolute silence for about an hour, then go about his day like he hadn't just wasted minutes of his—and your—life.
It's always the same.
He arrives, flaunts his profiling skills for an accumulated total of twelve minutes, and then sits across you like a rock for the remaining forty minutes.
Aaron could've talked more, but...
He despises you.
Well, not you, per se. He despises the profession, and you just happen to choose it as your career. Nonetheless, Aaron generalizes and includes you on his list.
He finds it unnecessary and a waste of one's valuable time. Presenting a series of well-thought-out facts that he's sure Spencer Reid will enjoy. A list of reasons why talking to a psychiatrist isn't as helpful as people perceive it to be.
Aaron spits the words 'family' and 'friends' for the sake of ease and comfort as if he doesn't flinch at the words 'your father' and his face hasn't been frozen into a permanent stern. Because why talk to someone who doesn't know you when there are people who know you best? He lies through his teeth. He lies to himself.
Then, there's you.
You don't know him enough to trust his lies.
"Profiling me won't get you cleared," you state out of the blue. "This is our seventh session, and you haven't said anything." You add, finally lifting your gaze.
Aaron feels taken aback. He'd never encountered a shrink with such pride at their job—they managed to infuriate him. You infuriate him.
Now that you've granted him the wish—your eyes meeting his—it's having an effect on him instead. One that he wishes he didn't feel creep under his skin, stimulating the anxiety he's worked hard to ignore.
Still, Aaron squares his shoulder, "Nothing is wrong with me," He claims like he's not feeling the pit of his stomach churn with every word. "I'm only here for the formalities." He says.
"Ahh," You deadpan, pulling your eyes down on your clipboard. Hushed scribbles echo in the room. "Is that what you told, Dr. Briar? Or Dr. McCormick? Stiles doesn't seem to remember you at all—"
"They deemed me fit to go back to work, which you don't seem to realize." Aaron cuts you off. He doesn't notice the slight lilt of his voice. How a vein peeked on his forehead as he furrows his brows.
You have an effect on him, and Aaron's in strong denial.
"How?" You lean a bit, propping against your lap. It's the first time he's ever let himself tear out of his 'I don't break' shell. You consider it a crumb of a breakthrough and a laughable stain on your pride.
Challenging his stability—you raise your brows—makes him tick.
A faux frown draws on your face—patronizing, "Did you play a staring contest, and they lost against you?" You notice the little twitch of his eye masked as a blink.
It's a little unprofessional to provoke your patient, but you do, anyway.
This one's been particularly adamant about manipulating you into permitting him back to work like you were born yesterday. You think it hilarious how smug he's been for the past six sessions. It is as if you didn't spend almost half of your life devoted to the study of behavior. Like you hadn't figured out his plans from the get-go.
Profilers. They catch a criminal out of idea of sorts, and they think they can read everyone. It makes you want to laugh while pointing at him.
Aaron stares at you with his usual stoic expression, intimidating eyes filled with unforeseen horrors, and a straight mouth that's no use in your four walls.
He decides then that he hates you with a passion.
You feel a vibration on your wrist, "Would you look at that? Your time's up, Hotchner." You withdraw, straightening your back as you scribble yet another word Aaron is curious to know.
If he only knew you're not really writing anything new about the nature of his mental state or anything legible at all, you imagine Aaron exploding like a stack of case files blown by harsh wind.
But can he blame you when he's given you nothing to write?
"Agent Hotchner," He corrects with gritted teeth. Aaron's jaw clenches as he pierces his gaze through you. His hands intertwined with each other as if he's preventing himself from clawing at you.
You smile at him, "In this room, you're just Aaron Hotchner. A patient. A case." You know the specific word will piss him off, much less the motherly tone you paired it with.
A tactic. Unlike him, you don't need a team of agents to get a rise out of a culprit. The bare idea of you, a stranger who has access to his life on a piece of paper, is enough a stimuli to get an individual aiming at your neck.
"So, between you and me, I think you should start talking if you ever want to fly to wherever city your team wanders in. The longer you take, the less progress we make, and the less progress you make, the more possible that the bureau will assign a new psychiatrist for you." You say nonchalantly, letting his anger lead him right into your trap.
The words float like small fire specks of dust, both dazzling and dangerous to the eyes. Getting assigned to a new psychiatrist is like getting an easy case directly handed to Aaron. However, it also means he'll have to restart his psych evaluation process, and he knows firsthand how time-consuming that is.
"But, then again, who knows? Maybe the next fella will let you slide like the others did. Or you'll have to attend a series of sessions again for a lengthy psych evaluation. I've got friends too, you know? They might do me a favor and make your life more… difficult." You're bluffing. In no way, shape, or form will you jeopardize his health, even if Aaron's the most stubborn patient you have ever met in your lifetime.
His nose flares as he stands up. You know that he's done and murdered you in his mind at the way he's glaring at you with invisible daggers, but you play it well and act blameless.
Aaron marches out of your office with blazing hatred. You watch as he dulls every vicinity he's stepped into like death taking a stroll. A part of you is apologetic to his colleagues. They'll be having one hell of a day.
Retreating back inside your office, you plop on your chair behind your desk as a heavy sigh escapes your lips.
You stare at Aaron Hotchner's patient chart.
"What am I going to do with you?" You ask rhetorically in the air.
Aaron Hotchner is—for you at least—a special case. A case so intricate you had to be careful how you'd tread the water, wary of its fragile ripples.
When Aaron's chart landed on your desk, you immediately knew that he'd be toilsome. He'd make it his goal to skip the talk and jump back onto another case. The same routine he did with his old therapists and psychologist, anyone that was able to write a note and say he's fine when he's really not—never have been for a long time.
You already had enough patients on your plate, but you just couldn't say no to your favorite Italian patient; you only had one. You're the best bureau-mandated psychiatrist. His words, not yours.
Then, again, you never fail to mentally brag about how easily you read Aaron just from his chart, his image, and the first step he took to get inside your office. You read him like an open toddler's book, a piece of cake.
During the first session, you learn how badly Aaron's last case had affected him. The intonation of his voice. The way he'd shake his hand, your hand. His scorn. His fiddling fingers.
It's amazing how he's managed to divert his anger towards you instead of the man who traumatized him.
Melodic ringing snaps you out of your trance.
Aaron Hotchner might just get what he wants.
Sunday, May 10, 11:51 PM
A sniffle tickles your nose as you lay flat on the carpet floor of your apartment.
Your face stings from tear stains, and you muse how horrid you must look after your makeup runs dry. Your chunky heels were still on. In a minute or two, you expect one of your feet to cramp.
The day has been hostile towards you.
The mind, which used to be an oasis of positive thoughts, has gone draught. Sleep begins to blur your vision, and you don't hesitate to let it take over.
Until a bombarding knock jolts you up.
"I'm here! I'm here! Calm down!" You shout as you swing the door open. A familiar man stands in front of you with a dour face. Your eyebrows narrow tightly, "Mr. Hotchner—"
"What did you write?!" Aaron badgers as he storms inside your apartment like he owns the place. He pivots on the balls of his feet once he's reached your living room, glowering at you with scalding fury. "I was relieved to know that you released me from your care and looked forward to my clearance. So, tell me why a random therapist called me this morning to confirm an appointment I didn't even know I had. What did you write on my report that I have to go through this again for the second time? Is dealing with your sick games not enough? I'm fine. I know I'm fine. I'm straight in the head to go back in the field. I aced the psych evaluation questions. Your sessions are the problem. You're the problem." His ears, face, and neck are burning red. If he's a cartoon character, you imagine he'd be steaming with smoke by now.
Quite surprised; you're standing speechless. You're watching Aaron like he's a crazy old hag yapping about the Revolutionary War and how she hates not having the power to shoot every redcoat for the sake of rage.
You head towards your sofa, taking a seat.
Aaron examines you in confusion, furrowing his brows.
After a moment, you look at him expectantly. "Don't be shy, Mr. Hotchner. By any means—" you nod towards the armchair across you, glancing back and forth between him and the empty space "—continue with your thoughts. You already started. Might as well let it all out."
He only clenches his hands inside his pockets as he bores holes into your head.
What a sad little man.
You scoff in your mind.
You lean against the back of the sofa, tilting your head to meet dagger-like brown eyes aiming at you. "No? Suit yourself, then." You shrug, feeling the soft cushions under your palms.
"Let me remind you that I'm a federal agent, and I can make your life a living hell if I want to." He threatens, glaring at you as if the twitch of his eye is enough to make you combust into thin air.
But all you see is a child on a tantrum, deprived of getting what he wants.
"Answer my question. What. Did. You. Write?" He growls.
Silence coats the two of you.
His heavy breathing fills the deafening air. Your nonchalance fuels his hatred more than ever and the sentiment is beginning to emit from both ends. It takes a lot out of you to think of multiple ways to sprinkle some salty sense onto him without stinging his wounds.
One thing you learned well enough in time is how good Aaron is when pushing someone's buttons. A perk of his prosecutor days and seasoned by his bureau career.
He's just troubled.
He's just in denial of his own pain.
You chant the words in your head—uncertain of its purpose. Detachment ironically detaches from your senses like old velcro.
"You're not the first agent in my office, Mr. Hotchner. And frankly, you should be thanking me for taking you in. Unlike your old therapists, I actually read through your chart and took the time to understand you to the best of my ability. I cared—" Shocked as he is, your eyes subtly widen.
Before you can continue Aaron speaks over you, "I do not care about your pity. What I wanted was for you to do your damn job and clear me back to work. But that's just little to no pay for a shrink, isn't it? You need messed up people to stay messed up so they can continue knocking on your door." A clear hint of a demeaning smirk flashes across his face.
The sheer irreverence makes you dizzy. The calm snaps, banishing kindness and composure out the window. And rage knocks on your door.
"That's the problem. You don't care. You don't care about yourself." Your tone is sharp—stern.
You knew. You knew from the moment his file thudded on your wooden desk. The moment SSA David Rossi charmed his way to get your favor. You know that Aaron Hotchner does what he believes is right. Not because the unit chief title has gotten in his head. No. Not the slightest. But because he only cares about his values and people.
And you're neither.
It's not you to hold grudges. So, you had it down and set before you accepted Rossi's request. You had it tattooed in your mind that no matter how sharp-tongued and insensitive the man before you might be, he's still just a man under the weight of the world's greatest horrors.
You cannot break. You're not allowed to break.
Pieces of you shatter at the realization that some patients under your care inevitably slip away from your fingers. How your promised oath to do no harm did nothing—not enough to stop the monsters that haunt the world. Not enough to stop you, Aaron's psychiatrist, from dumping your own frustration onto him the same way he's currently doing to you.
But you're not Aaron's psychiatrist today. You're not anything today. You're not on the clock. And no one except Aaron—to your demise—will ever witness such an ugly sight. If ever he shuts up about his dilemma, that is.
"I did my job exactly as I should." You declare, licking the bottom of your lips. Damned the Hippocratic Oath. You wonder if the healing gods will forgive you.
You really shouldn't say the words that are about to leave your mouth, but you've been taking whatever hostility he's got for the last two months; the capacity has reached its limit. A little bit of harshness wouldn't hurt, would it?
"When are you going to admit that the reason you can't sleep at night is not because of all the serial killers you claim I prevent you from catching?" You finally stand. You are a few inches shorter, yet you have never felt taller than you do right now.
You grit your teeth as you move closer to Aaron, almost a breath away, tiptoeing. "When will you admit that the mighty SSA Aaron Hotchner, unit chief, doesn't blink, not once, because he's afraid he'd become the very thing he promised to put away." You raise your brows, challenging him.
Aaron's face morphs into bewilderment and perturbation. His brows are sewn shut. His jawline pops out as he grinds his teeth.
Resentment. Fury. Vexation. Chagrin.
All Aaron felt was anger.
Antagonized.
A walking tower of pure acrimony, finger-pointing towards the innocent.
"Don't you dare compare me to those— I'm anything but." He towers over you, losing his words through the stream of lividity flooding all over his senses.
"Do you really believe that?"
Aaron studies your face. It's different. It's raw and maimed. A squeeze of guilt whispers, but he shoves it quickly.
"What did you write?" He asks once more, earning a scoff out of you.
You step back, staring straight into his glare. Crossed arms tight against your chest. Brows rest over your deadpan eyes.
"While SSA Aaron Hotchner is proficient at his skills and rather placid in physically and mentally challenging situations, I strongly recommend further evaluation in psychotherapy as his emotional capacity is at its limits. The stress accumulated from the job itself has given him little to no time to allow himself the indulgence to properly process certain impacts of the stimulus he encounters on the job. Will update after further observation. Is what I wrote… so far."
You pause.
"Aaron Hotchner is an insufferable, pompous idiot who's afraid of nothing but himself. He is incapable of stepping off his pedestal and refuses to cooperate while complaining about the consequences he himself caused. He has been through enormous trauma. It will be torture to try and help him cope properly. I do not want him in my care as he is a danger to his own progress, and I don't want any part of it. Is what I wanted to write."
Silence.
For him to reflect.
For you to breathe.
Aaron's frozen before you. A pale statue bleached under the moon's harsh reality. Words that used to be superficial insecurities float in the wind of truth, forming into a cage he's sentenced for life.
Your fuse still runs—a long time coming from two months of his deliberate disrespect. The silence annoys you, so you break it. "Excuse my hostility. No one's invaded my privacy and barged into my household at such an unreasonable hour before." The impassive smile on your lips can haunt anyone.
Maybe you've gone too far.
Maybe it's evil to say such blunt things to someone fragile.
But Aaron started the countdown. He lit the fuse. Now, you're exploding right before his eyes, reaping what he sowed. And he's forced to eat up all the debris.
His eyes twitch, scanning your face for any sign of bluff, any sign of fallacy. Any sign that he successfully pissed you off and your words were nothing but overwhelmed impulse.
"I—" he closes his mouth, then agape. Any sign. Aaron will take anything besides the forthright expression on your face. He inhales, "I'm sorry." The sound dies before it can roll off his tongue.
It's like watching a bully shrink into the tiniest man who's ever lived.
Okay, maybe you were a little bit brutal.
You gulp as guilt creeps along your veins, wishing that someone out there would just do you both a favor and snipe you out before the embarrassment settles.
Drawing in a gentle breath, you take another step back from Aaron with a delicate voice, "You're not starting a new evaluation, but you're not done either. I transferred you under someone else's care because of personal reasons. My life doesn't revolve around you, Mr. Hotchner. So, if you have nothing else to say, go home." Your eyes drift to the vast selection of objects in your living room to diffuse the growing pity you can't help but harbor.
Only then does Aaron discern his impulsivity. Internally arguing with himself as he allows himself to look at you. One thing he's never done since the moment he met you with screwed brows and unwavering bias. His gaze instantly softens like a thick fog around him finally dissipates. Like he's achieved a clearer vision.
The first thing he notices is the state of your face. The dry mascara that drew faded stripes down your cheeks. Your puffy eyes are now faint pink, but he recalls them being red when he arrived.
Then Aaron brings his attention to your black dress. It's a simple formal, mesh midi dress, but he admits how it elegantly fits you. But he doesn't say it aloud because there's only one reason why you'd wear such an article of depressing clothing.
As if your words and his own realizations aren't enough, he gets a glimpse of the clock on your wall that reads 12:03 AM.
His blood suddenly stops flowing—skin clammy and pale. Aaron's lightheaded from guilt and penitence.
Without another word, you lead him towards the door, swinging it open. The past 24 hours already drained you, and Aaron just about made it fifty times worse. All you wanted was to get a shuteye.
Aaron swallows the shame and makes his way out. Before he leaves, though, he turns to face you once more. Genuine curiosity pinches his brows.
"Why didn't you just clear me out like the others did if I was such a difficult case?" The word tastes bitter in his mouth. What used to be a desired flavor turned rotten on his palette.
He asks with utter softness, leaving you skeptical to respond.
"Same reason why you kept attending my sessions even though you clearly hated it." You slightly close the door, only leaving enough space for the two of you to see each other.
He looks at you like the answer's all over your face but written in some foreign language he's not familiar with. Aaron barely opens his mouth when you answer the question in his mind.
"You needed a place where you can just be."
The door shuts.
Friday, June 19, 11:02 PM
"I didn't know where to go."
You pore at Aaron Hotchner with nothing but a flimsy robe to prevent his imagination from going rampant—and dirty.
It's eleven in the evening. It's been one month since you last saw him. It's been a month since he barged into your apartment like an entitled brat. It's been a month since you let your emotions take over. It's been a month since the two of you revealed parts of yourselves either of you don't dare think of.
A month and no contact.
You didn't wonder; just hoped and prayed that Aaron finally finds it in him to let go of the emotional turmoil that's torturing the soul out of his body.
Sighing, you step aside and let him in, closing the door behind you like it's normal to stop by one's ex-psychiatrist's apartment in the middle of the night without prior notice and, most importantly, without meter to run the minutes he's inconveniencing you.
Aaron walks in, and the heavy humidity of arousal immediately hits him.
Oh.
Well...
If he had something to say, Aaron kept his mouth shut. He is at fault for driving straight to your place like he's your bestest friend. So, he doesn't mention it, ignoring the fact that you're barely clothed.
Besides, after your last interaction with him, Aaron's certain he didn't have any prerogative in how you'd like to spend your Friday evening.
"Take a seat. I'll be with you in a minute." Your steps are light behind him—feet nimbly grazing the wooden floor.
He turns to face you but quickly averts his gaze to avoid the glistening sight of your thighs. "Thank you..." He does his best to sound normal, choking in between syllables.
Aaron begins to regret his decision. Though, not enough to leave your place.
You disappear in the corner of the hallway. Allowing Aaron to finally release the breath he didn't know he was holding.
With you out of sight, his mind deliberately wanders...
What were you doing?
Aaron shakes his head vigorously like a worm under a storm of salt. The thought is undiscovered—untouched territory, forbidden to be exact. Should he form such thoughts, he'll do it somewhere else or rather about someone else.
Just as he caters to the sudden dizziness caused by his action, a man, half-dressed, walks past him, cursing under his breath and buttoning his shirt. Aaron's eyes widen a little, keeping his stoic face.
Oh, that's what you were doing.
Ick—as Aaron would like to call your visitor—had brown and curly, unruly hair. He was tall and definitely had a face, which, Aaron assumes, is nothing like the one he envisioned you're attracted to.
Somehow not a pleasant discovery compared to what he attempted to imagine—you, alone.
Ick looks at Aaron with a scoff echoing out of his throat, "Oh, what a surprise! She's a slut." He states smugly.
"Or she just wants someone better." The words spill out without hesitation, fired on sight. Aaron doesn't know where the boldness came from as he leans against the seat with a cocky smirk on his face. Definitely no more perplexed than the uncertainty of anger boiling inside of him. He glares at the man either way.
The man scoffs again before leaving with a couple more insults that Aaron thinks he's lucky to whisper, or your visitor would've left your apartment in an ambulance.
Ick slams the door, shaking the vase on the accent chest by the entrance.
Where did that come from?
He's questionably not as big of a hater as he was before, but Aaron can't determine the motivation that made him act the way he just did with a person who has business with you, which he should have no interest in.
Moments later, you come back, fully clothed, in an oversized hoodie and a pair of wide-leg linen pants. Comfy and a 180 contrast on how you dress at work, plus the garments you had on minutes ago.
You make a beeline to your kitchen, "Water or scotch?" You holler out, opening cabinets with a creek on their hinges.
The question is rhetorical. You place a glass with brown liquid glinting under the warm ambient light on the coffee table in front of Aaron, then plop on the armchair across from him, catering your own glass.
He stares between you and the glass while you kiss yours, never breaking your gaze. You hum in delight, making a popping sound with your lips.
Aaron opens his mouth and then closes it, falling into a cycle like a fish underwater. How should he explain himself? How does one explain why they're bothering their ex-psychiatrist past working hours? After making a scene a month ago? He swallows the thick void in his throat.
"Don't talk, just drink. Sit here for an hour. Then, go home." You say, opening up a book that's been sitting on the table since he arrived.
Aaron feels a surge of relief. He reaches for the drink and lets the smoky taste trail down his throat without hesitation. He wouldn't have guessed you as a fan of scotch—or anything not clear or fruity. This is the first he's seen you without some sort of filter he can't read through, and the observation prints you under a new light.
The silence comforts him. The occasional scrape of paper against paper with each flip of a page provides him reassurance. The company he finds within your presence gives him solace.
You let him be. Asked no questions, reading in peace like he was just any other friend who needed company.
He does as you said. Indulging in the hour of tranquility and stillness. His nerves tame. And he forgets why he went to you in the first place.
Why did he go to you?
Of all people. Of all the friends he brags about. The family he cherishes. His feet dragged—drove him to you.
The onerous unit chief chose to wander to your front door, sipping scotch as he enjoyed the silence and absence of others' guilting worry and constant craving to make him feel better when all he wanted was peace and letting the ache pass in gradual acceptance.
By the end of the hour, you call him a cab with the instructions for him to pick up his car the next day.
Aaron slept effortlessly that night.
Saturday, October 24, 9:24 PM
Aaron expected some sort of rejection or for you to slam the door close, or worse, ignore him as soon as you see his face through the peephole.
One can only tolerate a couple of unannounced visits from an insufferable ex-patient, right? He's surprised you haven't called the cops on him.
He skims your face for any sign of irritation or annoyance as soon as you reveal yourself behind your door, standing next to it to give him way. Aaron saw nothing but impatience.
You knit your brows, slightly tilting your head at his frozen build outside the frame of your door. "Well? Are you stuck or something? Get in, Hotchner—" You turn before you can even finish talking, disappearing down the small entryway.
He turns deaf for a moment. Your voice rings in his ears as if a bomb had just popped the only working drum he had left.
Hotchner.
Agent.
Mister—
Just Hotchner.
One simple change, and the light above your head suddenly looks brighter.
Like he's found something good. Something he can say he knows. Something he can trust(?)
"Don't forget to take your shoes off and shut the door!" You holler from the living room—unfazed.
Aaron flinches, snapping out of his trance. He wonders where you'd gone to, furrowing his brows, and yet enters your apartment with the permission you'd given him. He closes the door, pivoting on the soles of his dress shoes as he tentatively takes them off per your instructions.
He emerges back in your peripheral while you stare at the screen on your laptop, blue-filtered glasses back on. Your fingers hammer on the keys, soft sighs slipping past your lips every once in a while.
You glance at Aaron when his figure stays at the corner of your eye, cupping a coffee mug between your hands. "There's fresh coffee if you'd like. Are you hungry? I don't usually eat dinner, so I have nothing ready to eat, but I can whip something up." You blow over the surface of caffeine, and steam wafts on the tip of your nose.
"No—" He shakes his head, scoffing in confusion, "I'm sorry—"
"Apology accepted," You muffle into the mug.
Aaron's brows connect tighter, and his forehead creases. He looks at you like he's under an illusion, a hypnotic dream he can't quite distinguish.
"Hold on," He hoists his hand up as if to pause a scene in the movie. "I'm very confused. What is going on? Why are you being… casual and nice?"
"You say it like I'm incapable of human decency." Your back makes contact with the cushion of your sofa, pulling your legs close to your chest while one hand holds the handle of your mug. You roll your eyes when Aaron only stares at you, "Are you uncomfortable? Do you want to leave?"
Aaron shakes his head.
"Problem solved, then?" Confusion is still fresh on his blank face. You mentally smack your forehead. "There are patients who lack temporal sense, but turning them away when they clearly need immediate tending to would be a form of negligence on my part. So, feel at home." You theatrically stretch your arms, offering every corner of your space as his own.
"But I'm not your patient anymore. I've been back on duty for weeks." Aaron informs. Although he finds a place for his go bag on your floor.
If you didn't know any better, you'd assume he's about to stay for a sleepover—coming to your apartment late at night.
You wrinkle your nose, "Okay?" You look around as if someone else is in the room with you two. "Is that why you went here? You wanted to brag?"
Three months.
Aaron's been back to his usual routine for the past three months. And it's been four since he drank scotch on the very couch you're comfortably in.
A chuckle.
The sound tickles your ears, filling you with unexpected pride.
"No," Aaron shakes his head as the chuckle resonates through his chest. "I… I don't really know why I came here, if I'm being honest." He swallows air.
You nod, setting your laptop back on your lap. "Like I said, you're free to feel at home. Scotch is in the third cupboard. Coffee's in the pot. I've got some stuff to take care of, so help yourself." Your eyes are already fixed on the screen, hands jumping from one key to the other.
With your permission, Aaron ventures into your kitchen. Neat. Clean. Cozy. He somehow imagines you cooking as a hobby.
He settles for coffee. Asking you from the kitchen island if you'd like a refill—which you took without a thought, hoisting your cup up—and taking out a couple of his files to get a head start on his paperwork. He wasn't allowed to bring them outside the bureau's building, but it didn't matter at the moment.
Your apartment becomes a haven.
Aaron, for the first time in years, feels comfortable to slouch. He had no collection of when and how, but turns out he'd changed into a quarter-zip and one of his pajamas tucked in his go bag through the hours.
The two of you silently took care of your own thing until 1 AM strikes, and a yawn pulls you back into the earth.
You turn your head towards the kitchen to find Aaron scribbling over your kitchen island. He's sipping coffee—a fresh batch he made not long ago.
Stretching, you make your way past him. After placing the mug into the sink, you lean against it, crossing your arms as you stare at him. "Ten."
"What's that?" Aaron halts on his seat, lifting his head to look at you.
"I'm granting you ten visits," You announce.
"And that means?.."
Your face deadpans, and he does well at stifling a smile. "You can come here whenever you want—need, but only for ten free visits. It doesn't matter if it's late, too early, or unreasonable. I'm allowing you to knock on my door whenever you need. Any more than that, you have to attend my sessions in my office, where I get paid."
"What's the catch?" Aaron entwines his eyebrows, straightening his back as he props on the edge of the counter.
"No catch. Just one condition," You shift your weight on your other leg, "Don't come empty-handed. Food, drink, things, a person, anything. Bring something." Your brows hang on your forehead, anticipating any type of response.
Aaron weighs his choices. Calculated every possible outcome and benefit. He meets your eyes again. Index and thumb rubbing the growing stubble on his chin.
"Ten's a good number," He says as he nods.
Wednesday, March 2, 7:31 PM
Eleven months pass by in the blink of an eye.
It's the seventh time Aaron showed up without warning, and by this point in whatever acquaintance you two had, you aren't fazed or surprised anymore.
The fourth time he knocked on your door, he was carrying a hefty price of whiskey. An odd reason for a psychiatrist and a former patient to bond with, but you had no qualms about sipping neat whiskey that night.
At first, he stayed for an hour. Then, an hour turned into three. One time, a case hit too deep, and three became seven, but that only happened once—all you remember was a Wednesday night.
"Are you okay?"
Gentle sighs escape shivering lips. Tears pooling deep inside sockets.
One sharp sniff breaks it all.
You sob under Aaron's worried eyes as your grip on the knob almost snaps it off the door.
His brows twists and he reflexively yanks you by the back of your head into his chest, bringing you out of your apartment and into the complex's hallway.
"What happened?" He carefully inquires while he rests his chin atop your head.
You're a mess in his arms. Uncontrollable whimpers muffled in his soaked chest.
Aaron suggested that you two step inside for more privacy and heat, but he didn't complain when you two stayed frozen in the end of winter evening.
When it stops. The suffocating ache. You lightly push yourself off him, wiping the leftover tears off your cheeks—half of it already dampened his shirt.
Fifty-three minutes and seventeen seconds.
You cried to the point of dehydration.
"Sorry," you mutter, eyes down. "We should go inside if we don't want to catch hypothermia." You sniffle.
"Oh, we don't want that," Aaron attempts to joke, closely observing whether you'd react to it.
You didn't.
He closes the door behind him, following your figure as you practically drag yourself to your unofficial designated spot on the sofa.
"I know I'm the last person you'd want to hear this from, but would you like to talk about it?" He bites his inner cheek.
Nothing.
You only mold yourself into a ball.
Aaron hesitates whether to stay or leave you alone. It's true that you said he's welcome anytime, but you're definitely in no condition to entertain his own problems when you can't even look him in the eye the way you would, no matter how insufferable he is.
But he can't just leave you by yourself either. Nothing is stopping him, but he's not cold-blooded enough.
"It's not easy," Aaron fractures out of his trance at the sound of your small voice. You look at him with a tight-lipped smile. "This job, I mean."
You inhale a sharp breath, tucking your lower lip between your teeth. "I can be hopeful, positive, supportive… Everything to prove that a better life is possible, but at the end of the day, it's not my choice." You wryly chuckle. "It's the patient's. It's your decision to want to feel better. To want to change. To want to live—" You choke, and the tears flow once more.
"It's not about me, but I can't help feeling like a failure." Sobs spill off your lips, gasping for air. "I was supposed to make everything better. I was supposed to heal everyone and save everyone from whatever monster was hurting them. She said she's never felt so much better. She said it's the first time she felt so peaceful for years, Hotchner. She said she was looking forward to our next session. But she just… I didn't—" You gulp—struggling. "I didn't catch it. I didn't catch her lie. And hours later, I get a call from her mother telling me she— she died." Your hands shakily clasp your mouth to push the sobs back, but you fail.
Aaron doesn't know what to say.
But he knows what to feel.
He knows it well.
The guilt. The shame of never living up to your own promise. The pain of losing someone you swore to keep safe.
Then, it hits him like a wrecking ball.
How difficult of a patient was he before?
Has he ever made you cry before?
It's a stretch that you'd ever shed a tear over his stubbornness, but Aaron hopes you never did.
Because he's never seen anyone care so much despite getting all the hate. Despite taking all the blame. You stood your ground and became other people's foundation. You became their comfort.
You became the only thing that gave him serenity.
With the little time he's known you—a total of 43 genuine friendly hours—Aaron can testify in heaven that they had mistakenly dropped you into the earth. And he's never felt blessed to have someone like you. Never felt lucky enough to find someone with who he could feel broken as much as he could but never needed to save face.
So, he's heartbroken for you. And guilty that more than half of the time you'd known him, he made your passion a miserable experience.
And also guilty of developing feelings for you.
Saturday, August 13, 4:16 PM
"I'm not playing favorites, but your tech analyst definitely deserves better than being cooped up in the bureau's building." You say, plopping on the sofa with a soft bounce and a squeak from the coil spring.
Aaron hands you a glass of bourbon while sipping his own. Eyes fixated on the board on your coffee table. "I have no other choice. It's the only way to keep her safe. Unless you're willing to adopt her, I don't want to hear it." He chuckles, connecting his brows at the sight of your winning streak.
You two are playing Scrabble. It was Monopoly twenty minutes ago, but along the lines, you learned how butt-hurt a six-foot and two-inch man can get. Not an enlightening experience. It would have been two stars if you had to rate it.
So, you switched to Scrabble.
And Aaron is losing again.
Boy, were you so entertained.
He just came back from a fairly short case from Los Angeles. The case is not heavy or mentally draining—according to Aaron, but Jack's at a two-day sleepover, and Aaron has no idea how to spend the rest of his day—turning down Derek Morgan's and David Rossi's invitation to grab a drink at O'Keefe's with you in mind.
Aaron leans on the back of his seat. You don't know when your reclining armchair became his designated seat, but you noticed how lax he is in it and didn't question it further.
Months and months of relaxing stillness in your home—only ever full of bizarre surprises and irresistible joy whenever Aaron knocks at your door. With no means of communication or ever seeing each other at either workplace, Aaron's visits are welcomed but never fully anticipated. Thrilling.
Spelling the word 'loser' on the board with triple points, you bite the tissue inside your lower lip. "Maybe you can play Scrabble with her. Who knows, maybe you'll get lucky and win." You grin smugly at him.
Aaron gapes at you with a mixture of disbelief and merriment. He looks down on the flat entertainment, then back to you as he blinks. "You're cheating." He declares, pointing an accusatory finger at you.
A hearty laugh Aaron's never heard before roars out of you, and it's melodic to his ears. The meringue light spills through the forgotten open blinds of your window, painting your face with a dreamy filter. Aaron feels dizzy at the sight.
Your smile is contagious, and out of nowhere, his heart starts to pick up as if he'd caught whatever illness your radiant lips had by only staring at it. The loose hair over your forehead frames your face differently—different good. Like you'd been glowing, and the watts in your core mysteriously increased, so you're as bright as the sun and as warm as its light.
"You're just a sore loser. Suck it up, Hotchner." You shake with mirth, casually running dainty fingers along the curve of your ear.
"Aaron," He blurts too fast, too soon—too late to take back.
With a nonchalant shrug, you rephrase, "Suck. It. Up. Aaron." Much more emphasis and friskiness.
You tease him more about his lack of greatness in board games compared to his undeniable talent in every case the BAU encountered. But Aaron's already dazed by your lips calling his name.
Without either of you realizing it, 4 PM became AM.
Talk about abusing one's privileges. Aaron's moderately good at that. You conclude he's simply a strutting opportunist.
After the longest winning streak you've ever had in your life, you and Aaron decided to take a much-needed break and fell into silent reading—or, in your case, grooming your schedule for the next five months.
Midnight strikes along the grumble of Aaron's stomach. You two were too quiet. It echoed all over your apartment. Both of you fell into an obstreperous fit of laughter for another hour, stopping for a minute in between only to laugh some more as soon as you met each other's eyes.
Now, it's four in the morning. You're busy munching on Chinese takeout from a 24-hour restaurant Aaron called in. He claims he has handsome privilege courtesy of the owner, which you mockingly laughed at, to his dismay.
"I'm still terrified." He blurts.
The case must've been very difficult, then. He lied yesterday. However, at this point in your friendship, you expect him to do so, even if it's obvious.
You'd long given up on coaxing Aaron to talk about the case that brought him to your office. Or any other cases that got him knocking on your door at the most unreasonable hour. You thought that the best you could offer him was the comfort that no matter how beaten up he looked, you'd ask no questions and let him sort his boggled mind until he was ready to talk about it.
Looks like tonight's the moment. It only took more than a year, so it is not a big deal—to either of you, at least.
He looks at you when you remain quiet, silently asking for your permission. You nod, and he continues, "What Peter Lewis did to me was terrorizing. I always wonder whether I'm making the right decision or sending my agents straight to their deaths. I second guess. I'm scared that a part of him is still in my head, driving me to make a fatal mistake." Aaron starts playing with his food, poking an orange chicken with his chopsticks.
The memory brings a tangy taste to his tongue, and Aaron can't help but cringe. It's the first time he's ever talked about Peter Lewis. Granted, Aaron spoke about the event numerous times but never about how it made him feel. Never how it broke him.
Is it weird to say you're a little proud of Aaron?
Of course, you don't tell him that. Not out loud. You know he knows you're proud of him. And that's enough said.
With a few audible chews—caused by a carrot bit stuck between your teeth—that somehow doesn't piss Aaron off, you swallow the food and draw your lips into a thin line. You place the chopsticks on the side, wiping the rim of your mouth.
You know he's watching you. Anticipatingly waiting for a response for anything other than the silence he's accustomed to.
"Breathe," You gently instruct, clear enough for him to hear but not too loud for Aaron to jump in shock.
And he does.
His shoulder blades rise and fall into a soft rhythm. Aaron was holding his breath, and you knew. Of course, you knew.
"Do you know the purpose of defense mechanisms?" You quiz him, earning a nod from Aaron, and yet no following answer. "You were already mad at me even before we met. And for what? Nothing concrete, I'm sure."
Aaron was about to object, but you raised your hand to stop him, "I'm not trying to attack you. All I'm saying is that rather than being in denial, you displaced your frustration on someone else less threatening—me."
Silence.
"I'm sorry—"
"I'm not done, shush!" You close your fist to mute him, cutting him off.
Aaron subtly rolls his eyes. He started doing so on his fifth visit when Aaron brought Jack and a few video games.
He told you that Jack's heard about your interest in a couple of games and wanted to play with you, but you know damn well Aaron bought the game for himself. Nonetheless, you entertained them by teaming up with Jack and obliterating Aaron. He vowed never to play against you ever again, at least not to your face.
"I would never know the pain and suffering that you went through. And somehow, even with that fact, a part of your life was in the palm of my hand. You had no control, but I did. So, instead of understanding the why, you hated the wrong who. And it's okay."
You take a sip from your straw, and a bubbly sensation fills you. Your tongue glides over your lips as you lean against the counter. "In short, for a man who's been through a lot, you know how to cope." A shrug ends your sentence, grabbing another bite of chow mein on your plate.
"Yeah, right," Aaron scoffs. The sincerity in your voice sparks something in him. It's giddy and tempting. But he can't possibly show the smile that's itching to spread his lips.
But his nonchalance may have triggered something in you because Aaron doesn't expect your next move. His neck felt like a snapped glow stick after you manually turned his head to face you—grabbing him by the space between his neck and chin. Aaron widens his eyes in the process.
"Listen here, you stubborn poopy head." You start, forehead creasing.
Aaron badly wanted to poke fun at your poor, intimidating skills, but he realized you didn't need any pointers just by the glare in your eyes.
"Peter Lewis got to your head, but that doesn't mean you were weak to let him. Yes, you fought through the influence of the drug heroically. Yes, you saved your agents and, most importantly, yourself. But it's still okay to be scared. It's okay that you feel broken. Who says broken things aren't great?"
It might be the sleep deprivation that's hitting Aaron, but he's very much enjoying your little fuse. How your words meant nothing like how you sound.
"That silver watch of yours—" you glance at his wrist "—has been broken for years, but I bet if you pawn it, it'll be more valuable than me. Antiques are expensive because they have unique histories. They survived beaten up, scratched, damaged, but still as beautiful as ever."
You're rambling, explaining more than you need to. Felt obligated to drill in his mind that despite the bad things, Aaron remains good. You're uncertain—clueless—as to why you felt the need to prove his praiseworthy, almost as if you're trying to convince yourself rather than him.
"From my observation, you're a sharper profiler despite all the things you went through. A part of you suffered and died in that house and many houses before. Of course, you'll be broken. You're a human being, Aaron. Act like one for Pete's sake!"
"I don't know whether you're being nice or mean." He chuckles with a mischievous grin, marveling at the way your eyes narrow as you look at him.
"I liked you better when you didn't talk." You tut, rolling your eyes.
For a moment, your senses heighten, and the simple brush of his hand against the skin over your wrist, as he takes your hold off him, sends billions of electricity throughout your body.
Aaron smiles—genuinely. "Thank you," He says softly, clearing his throat. His hand is still tight around your wrist. "You simply could've slammed the door the first time I knocked, but you always let me in. I appreciate you tolerating me."
You laugh, retracting your hands off his skin before you melt in his grasp. "I did not let you in the first time. You barged in like I'm some fugitive." You fix your posture on the stool beneath you, looking away.
His chuckle wakes the butterflies in your stomach, and you shove them right back down by stuffing your mouth with food.
Your eyes catch a glimpse of the time, "Y-you better go home and change before your son wonders why his father smells like Chinese food for Sunday brunch. Jack's a big fan of good 'ole syrupy pancakes, there's a good one by the bureau's building. Better hurry up and pick him up." It's amazing how much you almost choked and stuttered as you spoke, hoping that Aaron wouldn't question the way your demeanor changed.
Aaron takes one last bite before towering next to you, "Let me clean up. It's the least I can do for imposing half of your weekend." He insists, swiping the styrofoam off your hands.
"Glad you got manners," You nod approvingly, earning another chuckle from him, making sure you gave him enough space to move around without brushing any part of your body, or you wouldn't know what the brewing feeling in your chest would make you do.
You mindlessly peer at Aaron's broad shoulders and dark hair that looks so soft you wonder if it'll melt with your touch. You blink, catching yourself mid-swoon.
After a few minutes, Aaron bids you goodbye and you wish him well, asking to relay a short message to Jack.
"I think you're only nice to me because of Jack," He jokes, pivoting on the heel of his shoes to get one last glimpse of you.
You give him a tight smile, raising your brows as you shrug.
One visit left.
Thursday, May 5, 12:51 PM
The news said Mr. Scratch escaped prison. Peter Lewis is out and about, no doubt, planning serious harm against Aaron. You turn the TV off. The image shrinks into a small diamond spark 'til it leaves a dark screen.
Ninety-eight beats per minute are your normal, but you surmise it's about a hundred and twelve at the moment as your mind anxiously ruminates your not-so-favorite-unofficial patient's well-being.
You glance at your phone, debating whether to give him a call, but even if you gain the guts to do so, you don't have his number. Who knew that refusing personal contacts would backfire? Aaron can knock anytime, you said. It doesn't matter whether he texts or calls before, you said.
Now, you have no means of contacting him, and you refuse to resort to his ways—going through his file like he went through yours.
It's a shitty feeling.
You keep your fingers as far away from your mouth as possible, afraid you'll bite your nails to its quick. If Aaron was with you, he'd say something annoyingly witty about how your anxiety's too easy to read, and you'd be bantering back a remark about his tells that not many notice but sure slightly pisses him off that you know him like the back of your hand.
Eyes dart in the direction of your entryway, waiting for any distinctive sound only Aaron makes whenever he closes the door like a teenager coming home past curfew.
"This is driving me crazy!" You ruffle your own hair, rubbing your face in frustration.
Tempted to wait outside your door for Aaron to arrive, in need of a company. A once-in-a-lifetime bone-crushing hug, given by yours truly. Or open up the 1997 Old Forester bourbon on top of your shelf that Aaron's been eyeing for a year.
You need to know if he's okay. You need to see that he's okay. Physically, mentally, and emotionally okay.
No one ever knocked.
Friday, November 18, 2:33 PM
"Aren't you curious?"
You look at Rossi, "About?" Your eyebrows pinch together. You backtrack the entire session in your mind, trying to remember if there is anything you are supposed to be curious about.
There's none.
Rossi turns to face you, a hand emerging out of his pocket. "You're not curious where he's been? I've known him for years, and I've never been more curious about his whereabouts 'til now." The hand waves around as each syllable flows, and slices the air every emphasis he makes like a conductor of his emotions.
He usually talks with his hand whenever he's emotionally troubled, attempting to make a point to himself, justifying that his feelings are reasonable.
David Rossi has been your patient for years; you can write any and everything about him into a best-selling book.
"You said it yourself, Dave," You shrugged with your arms. "You've known him for years. He and I saw each other a couple of times during our physician-patient interaction. Any interaction we had after is just the two of us drowning in silence."
Aaron never knocked that day.
He hasn't redeemed his last visit for the past five months. While it isn't the longest time he's never stopped by, you're bitter about it.
You couldn't sleep for a week after Peter Lewis escaped prison. You were afraid that Aaron's name would flash across any type of screen or mark a headline on every article and newspaper. You had to take anxiety medication to stop your body from trembling whenever the thought of him crossed your mind.
It was hell.
The utter hopelessness and lack of courage teared you apart. The strangeness. The nonexistence. You don't reckon a conversation with Aaron that involves you and him. Only you or him or whatever depressing topic comes up. You're not even sure if you had actual conversations. Always wallowing in silence while sipping either scotch or coffee.
But you two had a deal. No catch. Not even feelings. Developing one for Aaron did not cross your mind when you granted him the power to bother you at any running time.
All of it is to say you wish you had known Aaron's last visit was, in fact, the last.
Rossi squints, "You're telling me the quietness you shared didn't matter? That his company didn't benefit you the same way it did for him?" He stands tall, pleased with his words.
It did.
Of course, it did.
And you loved every second of it.
Even if you realize it too late.
But you won't say that to Rossi. Or to anyone ever.
A sigh drops your shoulders. You give him a blank stare, letting his question hover for a moment. "What do you want me to say?" You continue packing up your things on your desk, breaking eye contact.
If you knew David Rossi like the back of your hand, David Rossi knew you like every family of the victims he managed to save.
Worried.
Heartbroken.
Hurt.
Aaron never told Rossi about any interactions with you after he was released from your care. It's information Rossi's only ever heard a confirmation from you. But he knew it from the moment Aaron came to work after his first session with you and couldn't seem to get the specific idea of you out of his head.
"We're doing everything we can to catch Peter Lewis. Aaron will be back, I promise."
Pause.
You fight your every single sense to remain composed. Hearing Aaron's name instantly made you crumble. The sound of it hitting your chest with such force you had to bite the tissue behind your closed lip. You badly wanted—needed to cry and throw a tantrum.
The inner ends of your brows lift up as you nod, "Good for you... and for him. I'll see you in two weeks, Dave." You dismiss, walking around your desk to push him out of your office.
"Wait, wait! Just listen!" You retract your hands off his back and let him face you. "He's okay. He and Jack are safe somewhere I, unfortunately, don't know." He tries to meet your gaze—successful. "But! But that's a good thing. Not knowing where he is while in protective custody is good. Safe. I just thought you'd want to know."
You nod, "Certainly a good information, Dave. But not really necessary." Your tongue subtly swipes the bottom of your lips. "Aa—Agent Hotchner was a patient. Anything outside of that is not my business." Liar.
Rossi tucks his mouth into a thin line, nodding. "See you in two weeks, kid."
Tuesday, March 27, 6:12 PM
It's a nice Spring.
Your hair dances like the breeze is music as you trudge back to your apartment against the rush hour sidewalk traffic.
A year and a half.
You moved to a different place since then.
Moved on— from something that never existed, but really, your old complex just ran out of business.
You couldn't possibly move on, even if you wanted to.
"Good evening, Mrs. Willows," You smile at the old lady as she steps on the base of the stairs.
Mrs. Willows was old, close to ninety. And she's the best landlady you've ever met.
She smiles back, "Oh, just in time!" She waddles towards you, scraping the soles of her flats against the creaky floorboards.
"Did you need anything, Mrs—"
The old lady doesn't let you finish when she yanks you back up the stairs. Confusion fills you, but if you are being honest, you're more amazed by her speed. You didn't know it was possible for her to have that much energy.
"There's this handsome boy knocking at your door earlier. So, I let him in."
You dig your feet on one of the steps, halting her. "Mrs. Willows, you let a stranger in my house?" Your brows knit.
She looks at you, "Well, I figured it's one of your patients." She shrugs.
"I wasn't expecting any home visit today." You announce, peeking at the top of the stairs. "And I would've been home if there was…"
You excuse yourself, cautiously walking towards your door. The floor plan is different from your old apartment. But everything still felt the same.
The anxiety of a random stranger going through your place left you rushing to the living room. You don't exactly let any random patient inside your home. It's usually the profilers that seem to have a liking to you that lucked the privilege to visit your home at any given time.
"I'm sorry, but you're gonna have to set an appointment at the clinic—" you abruptly stop, blinking.
Aaron Hotchner.
He's sat on the armchair, only lifting his gaze after he'd closed the book you were reading before you decided to step out to run some errands.
He is wearing a navy blue quarter zip sweater and a white shirt, peeking from under. It's paired with loose-fitting gray casual pants. Like his closet had an upset stomach and threw up all over him.
The bags under his eyes are almost invisible. It used to be a tint of greenish purple. A proof of his late nights and stressful days. He's caught up with sleep for a while now.
His hair, a little longer than you're accustomed to, somehow made him look young and boyish. Probably why Mrs. Willows referred to him as a boy.
It's quite an image. Not one you'd expect to see upon opening your front door, but you mentally admit liking it.
He looks refreshing and well-rested.
"I heard you started your own practice?" He didn't mean to form it as a question, tongue-tied by nervousness. He flashes an awkward, subtle smile, dipping his hands into his pockets.
Your lashes flutter like butterflies gliding through the soft wind of Spring, except you're struggling to go against the breeze, winded by the city pollution.
"H-have you eaten?" You ask, snapping out of your trance as you head to the kitchen. Great. A question for a question. You're as nervous as he is, and you don't feel the need to hide it, though you aren't inclined to admit it.
He chuckles, and it still makes you melt after a year of trying to remember how it sounds, "That's your first question? Not 'What are you doing here?' or 'How did you find me?'" He follows you to the kitchen, it's a lot smaller than the one at your old place but you had a dinner table now, which still feels like an upgrade.
You turn and face him, leaning against the counter, "I'll just charge the entire team on their next visit. But I have a feeling David's the culprit." You blurt, earning raised brows from Aaron. "Oh? They didn't tell you? Your team unofficially designated me as their psychiatrist. I guess they also kept an important information from you." You twist on your feet to focus on the produce you carefully picked in hopes someone would join you for dinner.
But you didn't expect Aaron to be that person.
"Are you mad at me?"
"No!" You almost stumble as you spin back to face him. "I'm in no position to be mad. If a patient doesn't need my services, then I have no say." You lick the lower of your lip, biting it as soon as your tongue glides past. Heat pooling in the back of your eyes.
Aaron steps closer, "I didn't mean to—"
"I told you I'm not mad."
"You're really going to lie to an FBI profiler?"
"Former," You correct him, sniffing as you fight the tears from rolling down your cheeks. Your head's tilted up, almost facing the ceiling. Anger and frustration hammer into your chest.
He rolls his eyes, trying to catch yours. "Former, right." He parrots with a little more sarcasm. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you anything... I needed to make sure Jack's safe." He softly speaks, making sure you understand every syllable.
It's your turn to roll your eyes, blinking and letting a tear fall in the process. "You don't have to apologize for protecting your son. I'm not evil, Hotchner. I'll do the same thing for my family. I'm completely indifferent about your disappearance, and i-it's allergy season. I'm fine." You wipe the tear stain off your face.
"I missed hearing you say my name like it's a foul word." Aaron smiles so brightly you thought you were dead and some divine was just using his image to guide you across.
"Seriously? That's what you took from it?" You shake your head, turning your back to him once more. "I feel bad for Jack now that you're a full-time father."
Aaron laughs, and by definition. "Oh, he's had enough of me." His eyebrows jump on his forehead, drifting his eyes aside as if he's replaying every instance Jack's complained to him.
You laugh, too. A full hearty laugh that seems to source from the casualty between the two of you despite the irritation you felt.
It's still the same. The ease. The effortless flow and connection despite anxious nerves. It felt like talking to an old friend you've known longer than you are alive.
You nibble on your lips, "So? You're off protective custody, or do I have to call you Brad?" You quiz airily, back still facing him to hide any form of amusement that's forming on your facial features.
"Brad?" He scoffs, crossing his arms and knitting his brows. He sounds about offended as if you'd disrespected his entire bloodline.
"Yeah, you look like a Brad to me." You remember a story from the women in the BAU. One that they happily shared one evening at Rossi's before they all begged to be added to your list of patients once you start your private practice.
Aaron lets out another scoff. "No, I'm just Aaron. Aaron to everyone. Aaron to you." He grumbles something under his breath that you don't hear, but a clear indication of his disapproval regarding the name.
You stifle a giggle, "Well, just Aaron. Consider yourself lucky that I got a free slot. I would've been with a patient by now." You state.
"Am I really just a patient to you?" Aaron inquires from behind you. He attentively observes for any subtle movement or expression in your voice. There's a longing look in his eyes that you aren't aware of. A frown drops his lips as he adds, "I at least thought we were friends."
"Mm," You hum a chuckle, "More like my stalker. But sure, we'll go with yours... friends—"
He spins you by the waist, and you're not sure if your initial thought of dreaming is ending anytime soon as your body tenses under his hold.
A small yelp squeaks out of you, hands flying behind you on the counter as if to hold yourself up from your wobbly feet. And you're certain both of you can hear the loud pulse on your carotid.
"Hotchner, what the hell?!" You chastise, pulling back, but to no avail. Caged and pinned by his strength, and you're too baffled to react accordingly.
"I'd like to redeem my tenth visit." Aaron smiles from ear to ear. You never thought it possible for a stern-faced man to ever grin this wide. To ever be this bright and bubbly.
Aaron keeps the two of you that way for a few minutes. His face is a few inches from yours. You can hear him calculating in his head.
Only the busy street outside and one of your neighbor's loud TV fills the silence.
"Your pupils are dilated." Aaron grins mischievously. He further scans your face, the same way he did when he used to be your patient, reading you like it's his job to know every micro-movement and expression you make.
Your eyes widen, "Stop—" Your voice barely comes out, breath hitching halfway through your throat. "—profiling me." The space between you and his body feels suffocatingly good. It's making you dizzy.
"Usually, you're composed, but you can barely look me in the eyes." His hands remain on your hips, and every twitch of it makes you stiff like a statue. "Am I making you nervous?" He quips wittily.
Like a switch, your heart rate steadies, and his image becomes clear.
It's Aaron Hotchner.
Just Aaron, he said.
Warmth surges through your veins. You stare at the grin on his face.
Your head tilts, and you blink excruciatingly slow. "Are you trying to ask me out, Hotchner?" You mirror the trail of his eyes like a map.
Aaron beams like he'd won the lottery. Sending you impulsive thoughts such as kissing the smile off his face.
It's tempting and nauseating.
And if he doesn't stop, you just might.
"Ten."
Your eyebrows merge in confusion, "What?"
"Ten dates," He breathes as he looks you in the eye. "Let me take you out on ten dates. Then you can decide if I'm just one of your many stubborn patients or if I can be more. Let me make it up to you in ten dates. Please." He implores, hopeful, or rather knowing that you'd say yes.
And he'd be right.
All you want at that moment is to say yes.
But teasing him won't hurt, at least not you.
"And what's in it for me?" You try your best not to smile as you taunt him.
Aaron rolls his eyes, but his grin tugs the corner of his lips up. "You get unlimited access to me?"
"Wow, that's... very compelling." And you burst out laughing, folding on your stomach as you lean against his chest. You inhale, "Sorry, I expected better negotiation. Uh, any catch?" You say between chuckles.
He shakes his head, "Just one condition," He's chuckling now, too. Not immune from your contagious giggles. "I spend most of my days with you. Even if it's just sitting in silence. I want it to be with you." He lets go of one of your hips and tucks a strand behind your ear.
The giggles die down a bit, gazing at him with reverie. You nod after a few seconds, squeezing his arms. You lift yourself, tiptoeing, closing the gap.
You leave a quick, soft peck on his lips, smiling as you get back on your feet.
Aaron smiles, and you're as ecstatic as he is.
Another nod fills your chest with utter joy as you breathe in euphoria.
"Ten's a good number."
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misserabella · 6 months ago
Text
two geniuses (don’t get along)
enemies to lovers;; spencer reid x fem reader!
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
masterlist!
note; in this fic lila’s episode happens after elle’s departure to make the story have more sense. (S1 E18). also there have been some changes :))
synopsis; spencer reid; doctor spencer reid. some of them (mostly of them), would say he’s a genius. but if he was, then so you were. maybe that’s why you hate each other. maybe that’s why you can’t stand him.
cw;; +18 content! minors dni!, reader and spencer’s competitive asses, talk of murder, graphic scenes, weapons, guns, blood, shots being fired, lila flirting, spencer kissing lila, lots of fighting, lots of tension, teasing, apologies, reader getting hurt (mentions of stitches), threats, murder of secondary characters, talk about kinks and trauma (spencer being a smartaas), mention of spencer’s childhood and her mom… ( i bet there’s so much more but i can’t remember rn) angst, fluff and smut in upcoming chapters!!!
“another coffee, pretty boy? you wanna die?” morgan inquired the puppy eyed profiler, whose right hand held a cup of freshly brewed coffee.
“actually, the caffeine in coffee has been found in animal and cell studies to protect cells in the brain that produce dopamine. in a large prospective cohort of more than 500,000 people followed for 10 years, an association was found between drinking higher amounts of coffee and lower rates of death from all causes.” he easily spat in less than a mere minute, making morgan scoff.
“it’s not considered coffee if a 99% of it is sugar, reid.” you barged into their conversation, taking a look at the files of new cases.
“sugar is one type of carbohydrate, as are fiber and starch. carbohydrates are essential macronutrients.” he defended himself, taking a sip of his coffee-sugar.
“wrong. although carbohydrates are essential macronutrients since the body uses them in large amounts, something wrong about your thesis is that sugar is not one of those macronutrients. the body doesn’t use it. in fact, the effects of added sugar intake which are higher blood pressure, inflammation, weight gain, diabetes, and fatty liver disease, are all linked to an increased risk for heart attack and stroke. so yeah. technically, morgan was right. you might die.” you nodded towards the man, who smiled at you, walking towards you and taking your face in between his hands.
“have i told you how much i love that brain of yours?” he inquired, leaving a kiss to your forehead. “brilliant.” he smiled, raising his hands in victory since for once he had won spencer and his extensive knowledge. the profiler simply rolled his eyes.
“thanks.” spencer spat at you, to what you smiled.
“you’re very welcome, agent.”
“it’s doctor.”
“yeah, yeah. whatever.”
spencer reid. with an IQ of 187, an eidetic memory, and the ability to read 20,000 words per minute, he was considered a real walking genius. maybe that’s why the two of you seemed to despise each other so much. people say geniuses actually like each other. well, you and spencer were the exception. it was easy to get on his nerves. he was not used to having someone smart enough to actually suppose a threat to his intelligence. yet there you were. you had been jumping your way up to college since you were twelve, and at the ripe age of 22, and numerous phds later, you had found yourself working at the BAU.
you had been hired after elle had left the team, and everyone had seemed happy greeting you. you had specially made quick friends of penelope and morgan. something reid didn’t seem to like. well… he didn’t exceptionally like you. something that seemed stupid ‘cause you two were the perfect pair. there was nothing the two of you didn’t know, nothing you wouldn’t catch or realize. maybe that’s why spencer despised you. ‘cause now they had you too, not only him.
it was actually a pity. you liked smart people. you liked to share opinions and learn new things you might not know with the help of others. but spencer was borderline narcissistic, and that made your body cringe in disgust. and worst of all, he was really attractive. curly caramel hair, hazel puppy eyes, full lips, small straight nose, tall stature, pretty hands… also his voice…
well, anyways. you were losing focus.
so you’d decided to match his energy. and that only seemed to make the situation worse. sure, you two worked together, but only because you had to, if you could you’d much prefer to do everything alone rather than have to share office with reid.
hotch caught your attention as he pushed a file on your table.
“and what’s this…?” you sung as you took it, inspecting it.
“training program in los angeles.” you looked at him. he was leaning against your table. “want you to go with gideon and reid.” you let out a single chuckle, tossing the paper on your table.
“no.” you simply said, watching the man sigh. “tell jj to go! or prentiss!” you offered.
“can’t. jj is helping penelope to trace an unsub and prentiss is new, need someone who has been on the ropes longer.”
“then what about morgan? he’s not doing anything.” you pointed at the man who played with a mini football.
hotch looked at you. “please? you are the only one who gets reid. you know how he can be…”
“a narcissistic, egocentric, babbling, childlike, fourteen looking mess? yeah, i know.” you smiled. “but what do i win in this situation? i mean i must gain something if i’m gonna spend more time than necessary with him.”
“a free weekend.”
“done.” you gave him your hand. “a pleasure doing business with you, sir.”
-
“spencer! spencer reid!” you hear someone call for your work-mate, a tall smiling man approaching him and shaking his hand just as the three of you entered an art exhibition. “look at you. you look just the same.” he chuckled as he gives him a quick hug. “nothing changed… spencer was the only 12-year-old in our graduating class. just the same.”
“thanks.” spencer awkwardly says, giving the man a tight smile. “these are special agents jason gideon and (y/n) (l/n). this is parker dunley. we went to high school together as you can probably gather.” he introduces all of you.
“hey. it’s a beautiful gallery.” jason gives him his hand in a shake.
“oh, thank you, thank you. parker smiles, later on turning towards you.
“contemporary art… right?” you inquire offering him your hand, to what he nods. “contemporary modern art includes a wide range of mediums and genres. it is often characterized by its use of new media, such as video and installation art, as well as its rejection of traditional art forms. contemporary modern artists often experiment with form and content, and their work can be highly conceptual.” you say, making the man chuckle.
“i see you brought your computers.” parker jokes with gideon about spencer and you. “another genius like spencer?”
“oh no, men are just smart. woman are the geniuses.” you smile, making him chuckle.
“and funny, huh? i see, i see.”
spencer coughs to grab the man’s attention. “jason’s a big contemporary art enthusiast.”
“well, we’re exhibiting four up-and-coming artists in this show. everything is for sale. and i could definitely swing a nice discount for a friend of…” he loses focus as a blonde beautiful woman enters the exhibition. “lila! hey. guys, come on.” he invites you three towards his friend, coming up to her to say hello.
“do i look 12-years-old to you?” spencer inquired gideon, to what you scoffed, thanking the waiter that offered and served you a glass of champagne.
“oh, totally.” you said as you took it, taking a sip as you heard spencer crack a fake laugh.
“real funny.”
you three made your way towards parker and… lila. she was a beautiful blue eyes-blonde young girl. the basic american beauty standard.
“spencer. you ever met a real movie star?” the man asks, to what the girl beside the blonde scoffs.
“movie star? please. she has a supporting role on a television series about beach volleyball. totally blue-collar.” your eyebrows slightly rise.
“what a friend…” you whisper to your glass, taking another sip of the champagne.
“i’m lila.” the girl gives a sweet smile to spencer, and you almost roll your eyes.
it’s only a matter of time.
“hi, im doctor spencer reid… i’m spencer. you don’t have to call me doctor.” he corrects himself.
lila chuckles. in 3… 2… 1… and tucks her hair behind her ear. there we go.
“cool.” you say, turning around without even introducing yourself, it’s not as if she’d pay attention to you. she’s too focused on spencer to care as you make your way through the gallery, taking the artwork in, trying to scape the probable flirting that was about to go down.
later on you found the two of them chatting in front of a picture in which the blue and green dominate.
“does it make you feel anything?” the blonde asked him, and you silently expect an answer from spencer.
“like what?” he asks. god he sucks.
“i can’t tell you how to feel.” lila chuckles at his frown.
“right now i feel pretty good.” he smiled and you roll your eyes.
“lila? can i talk to you for a moment?” parker interrupts their chatting and the girl nods, quickly glancing at spencer.
“excuse me.”
“sure!” he gently says, and you make your way towards him.
“feeling pretty good, huh?” you inquire him, teasingly, and he groans. “you totally suck.” you take a sip of your glass and he looks at you. “poor girl seems desperate.”
“desperate for what?” he inquires, frowning.
“oh come on, reid. and you call yourself a profiler? it’s obvious she likes you. she was trying to flirt with you.” you obviously state. “she was trying so hard and you were not catching on…” you laugh, and he sighs.
“you know ogling on other’s business is rude, right?” he questions you.
“we’re the fbi. we’re on everybody’s business. that’s our job, reid.” you ignore him, taking a look at the photograph lila and him were staring at. “calming, isn’t it?” you say and he looks at the photograph as well, taking it in.
“sometimes, the color blue is associated with loneliness and sadness. it usually happens when you combine it with specific elements, like rain.” he spits and you chuckle.
“i know that, genius. the thing is not how it’s supposed to make you feel, it’s how it really makes you feel.” he looks at you as you sip from your cup. “with lila, you might feel good, ‘cause you enjoy her company, with me on the other side, you might not even want to be here, staring at a photograph that you’ve probably seen before. that’s because you focus on everything too much. you need to see what the picture actually tells you, not focus on the person you’re staring at it with.”
spencer’s hazel eyes go back to the picture, trying to focus on it, not on your presence, or the amount of voices that surrounded him.
the exhibited photograph shows an empty gas station, lights of green engulfing it as the nightlight blue sky surrounds it. it takes spencer back to his childhood. to those days in which even if he loved his mother, he couldn’t spend another minute by her side and left his house late in the afternoon for a walk. it helped him get out of his head. he remembers watching the sun go down as the night took over the sky, studying and calling out the constellations above his head, trying to find a solution to his mother’s illness. the stars never worked, and he was always left…
“it makes me feel alone.”
-
“you know, we really can get ourselves to the airport.” gideon said, reid and you trailing behind him as the police officer guided you to his car.
“i didn’t invite the fbi here to let them make their own way around town.” he says, never minding gideon.
“we really appreciate it.” reid says and you whistle.
“so you have manners, huh?” to what he groans.
“oh, shut up.”
“hey, i can’t thank you guys enough for conducting the seminar.” kim smiles.
“well, don’t hesitate to call if there’s anything we can help with.” gideon offered, putting his bags on the trunk of the car.
you stretched your arms after having pushed in your own. “can’t wait for that free weekend.” you muster happily, to what spencer frowns.
“free weekend? what are you talking about?”
“a special thanks from hotch for coming all the way here and putting up with you.” his mouth falls open at your words.
“i didn’t get any free time and i had to put up with you!”
“that let’s you know who’s the problem in this equation.” you falsely smiled at him, patting her shoulder, and you relished on the way his jaw tightened.
your conversation ends as the three of you watch officer kim end a phone call with a not very enthusiastic ‘great’.
“everything alright?” jason asks.
“double murder at hollywood bungalow.” he informs. “a celebrity. a young movie star, natalie ryan, and her fiancé shot to death.”
“very romantic.” you mutter.
“it’s gonna be a major pain in the ass. hey, you guys care to take a quick look before i drive you to the airport? it’s on the way.” he asks, and gideon accepts the offer.
“absolutely.”
you sigh as you get on the back of the car along with spencer.
“seems like that weekend is gonna have to wait.” he happily and teasingly smiles and you send daggers in his direction.
“i’ll choke you with my bare hands.”
“did you get that kink by exposure or trauma?” your mouth falls and your eyes widen.
“what?” you almost yell, watching him ponder.
“maybe it’s because you like to have power and control. have you talked about this with a therapist?”
“you’re gonna have to see a therapist after the torture i’m gonna put you through if you don’t stop that fucking nonsense.” you warn him, and he raises his hands.
“i’m just saying, there’s nothing bad about seeking mental help-”
“spencer!”
-
“no sign of forced entry.” reid points out as the four of you enter the murder scene.
“same weapon.” gideon informs watching at the two bodies.
you stare at the female, getting closer. “the girl was shot execution style, once in the head. the male three times in the torso.”
“so you have two different MOs.” jason wonders before going back to officer kim, talking about the case. you crouch down to take a better look at the man’s corpse.
“what? you found anything?” spencer inquired from behind you, to what you shook your head.
“nah. just fantasizing.” he frowns.
“fantasizing. what the- what would you possibly be fantasizing about in a murder scene?”
“oh you know… you… in that position… you know? it’s really sexy, you should try it. here don’t move let me get my gun.” you offer while getting up, and he just rolls his eyes, leaving you behind.
“what do you think?” gideon asks the officer about the case, wanting his insight.
“i’ve had a couple other cases recently, past few months. same type of weapon, 22 caliber handgun, both shot in the head.” you look at the bodies. “the first was an established film producer, wally melman, and the second was chloe harris, another young actress. though not as well-known as natalie here.”
“any forensic evidence?” reid asks as you step away from them, taking in your surroundings.
“no, and the guys have been going through this place all morning and haven’t come up with anything.”
“so he clearly knows how to cover his tracks.”
“or hers.” you mutter to yourself.
“twenty-two’s are small but efficient. they bounce around inside a person like a pinball.” jason said.
“preferred weapon of the mafia.” spencer added. “you know, there’s no obvious sexual component to these crimes, which is usually the case with serial murders.”
“so you’re thinking this is a serial killer?” kim asks.
“well, it’s certainly a series of murders. we don’t know enough yet to call them serial.” you step into the conversation.
“would you consider hanging out in LA a little while? let me lean on your expertise until we do figure out what we’ve got?” the officer inquires and gideon nods.
“yeah, just cancel the flights. we’ll have the rest of pit team out here ASAP.”
-
the unsub seemed to follow his victims, since he knew their schedules. there was not a single witness, he knows how to blend in and hide in plain sight. he’s meticulous.
and everybody is watching.
just like everybody was watching spencer and lila.
after finding out that the unsub was actually stalking the blonde, and killing people to help her with her career, she had somehow scurried her way under spencer’s protection. it actually bothered you. ‘cause spencer seemed so distracted. and it was totally unprofessional to get involved with a target being their agent.
you were on her studio, studying everyone surrounding her. but it was one person that caught your attention.
“who’s that?” you question prentiss.
“that’s maggie, maggie lowe. for what i know she just works here.” she answers you. “why?”
“they seem pretty close, don’t you think?” you ponder, watching her physical language. “she also seems nervous, she avoids lila’s eyes.”
“maybe she’s just shy.” she shrugs, but knows what you’re pointing out.
“maybe…” then, jj appears.
“what are you guys talking about?”
“lila and possible unsubs.” emily fills her in, accepting the coffee she offers her, you take the one she handles you too with a thanks.
“talking about lila… look who’s approaching her.” she devilishly smiles. you almost groan at the sight of spencer talking to the blonde. “they seem to have hit it off.”
“ugh don’t start. he’s so focused on her when in reality he should be focused on his job…” you sip at your coffee, not realizing the shared look the other two girls send each other. “so unprofessional.” you shake your head.
“are you really mad because he’s distracted from his job or by the fact that a pretty girl is distracting him?” jj asked you, taking in your frown and confused expression.
“what?”
“oh come on, really? do you really not feel it?” emily pushes in too, and you look at them.
“feel what? i-i don’t understand.”
“there’s this weird tension in between the two of you.” the brunette explains, being backed up by the blonde.
“it’s like when two little kids like each other and they don’t know how to show it so they just mess with each other.” you scoff.
“you’re saying that spencer and i are attracted to each other?” you inquired them both and they looked at the other. “come on guys, have you seen him? have you actually worked with him? he’s a fucking narcissist, he makes my life impossible just because i’m as smart as him. i don’t like him. at all. i can’t even stand him!” you rant. “he does this thing when he’s focused, playing with his hands and pencils, it’s so distracting. and when i state a fact, he just has to find something to actually make it wrong. every single time. and let’s not talk about how fucking childish he is, if you guys had been here for the training program, i swear to god he said this stupid things about kinks and me having trauma, oh my god i wanted to fucking kill him. he diminishes me, and thinks he’s better than me. and it just makes me sick…” you take a deep breath when you notice how much you had actually talked and your friends’ looks. “what i mean to say is, no. i don’t like spencer reid. and if he wants to fuck his job up, i’d be more than happy.”
morgan suddenly appeared, hotch right behind him.
“guys. there’s something you have to know…” the first talked.
“michael ryer’s dead.” the second finished.
“oh shit.” emily cursed.
“does lila know?” jj asked.
they shook their head.
“she’s gonna be devastated.” jj said to what you sipped at your coffee.
“well at least she has spencer, right?”
“oh, yeah. can we talk about that real quick?!” morgan inquired, astonished.
“no, morgan!” the girls stop him and he raised his hands.
“okay… but the kid has game.”
-
“woah. i like your house.” spencer said as you two entered lila’s house.
how had you managed to end up with the two of them alone, you didn’t know, and you didn’t like.
“i rent it.” the girl smiled.
“nice.” he nodded.
“lila, you should probably change all your phone numbers.” you said, messaging your team, they’d found something concerning nude photos of the young artist.
“i’m unlisted.”
“anytime you call an 800 or an 888 number your phone number’s put into a data bank that’s then sold to telemarketers. if someone gets your phone number they can go online and research all your records.” you actually responded.
“woah, are you a genius like spencer too?” spencer.
“no. i’m actually smarter.” you gave her a small smile, making her chuckle.
“uh… you should probably carry a piece of paper and pen with you wherever you go in case you see any suspicious license plates that often reappear.” spencer tries to change the conversation as you two followed the blonde towards her kitchen. “and a security dog too.”
“allergic.” she simply answered. “do you guys want some tea?”
you shrugged. “yeah, sure. thanks.” spencer nodded as well. it was already getting late, the sun leaving the city’s sky.
“i’m gonna go change while the water boils, make yourselves comfortable.” she said while making her way upstairs.
you went back towards the salon, your eyes wandering towards a collage on lila’s wall. spencer got your left side, his white stripped button up shirt’s sleeves rolled up to his elbows.
“feel anything yet?” you asked him.
“there is something definitely appealing about this one.” he said and you nodded.
“like lila?”
he looked at you, his mouth falling open to say something, but just as the words were to fall from his lips, the blonde returned in a a more comfortable outfit, making her way towards the patio of her house, beside the pool.
“what are you doing?” spencer inquired her.
“i just need some air. the tea is on the kitchen.” she responded.
“what? no, lila…” your eyes rolled to the back of your head as you watched him go after her.
you could hear them talk and spencer beg her to come inside since there was a psychotic killer aiming at her. you made your way back to the kitchen just as fast as you saw the blonde lean into him, one of her hands tugging at his tie to pull him down. great.
your hands took the cup of steaming tea that lila had prepared you, your eyes on spencer’s as you took a sip. but the warm liquid was poured all over the floor of the kitchen, your head spinning at the blunt trauma that stroke you. your hands went to the side of your forehead as you fell, taking in the sight of your blood. you groaned as someone took you from your hair, pulling you and dragging you across the floor, your hands getting cuts from the smashed cup of tea.
“come here.” the unsub said, taking away your gun, and… you knew that voice. your eyes met the blonde’s.
“maggie lowe?” you muttered to yourself. so you were right. she was the killer and stalker.
you got dragged all the way to the salon, where you could see lila and spencer kissing from the distance. but the kiss quickly broke when maggie fired a shot up into the ceiling, capturing their attentions. spencer quickly pulled out his weapon, pointing at maggie, whose gun’s barbell was right against your head.
“maggie?” lila inquired as they slowly made their way towards you two.
“why’d you have to bring these people here?” she asked lila. “put down the gun.” she ordered spencer, clocking the weapon that kissed your skin. he quickly lowered it, calling out for the killer. “don’t call me maggie! you don’t know me!” “come on lila, let’s go. we gotta go baby, let’s go.” she ordered the actress in a soft yet hurt voice.
“maggie don’t hurt her, you don’t need to hurt her.” you didn’t know if he was talking about lila or you. or maybe both.
“you don’t know anything. i would never do anything to hurt lila. i created her.”
“no, you didn’t.” lila said.
“yes, i did!” you closed your eyes when the barbell dug harsher against your temple. “i did everything for you! and you betray me by bringing these people here… to our house!!!”
“so ungrateful…” you say, loud enough for maggie to hear you. “look at you… you gave her everything and you saw what she did to you… she kissed him. she told him she loved him.” you lied, looking at spencer. he caught on.
“what?” maggie incredulously said.
“i heard them. i saw them kissing each other like animals!” you yelled. “he abandoned me… and now i’m here. about to be killed because of him!” you spat, meeting maggie’s eyes. “you don’t have to hurt me. they don’t deserve us. i’m on your side maggie… i know how you feel. i know how it feels to be betrayed like this…” you nodded, seeing her eyes change. “give me my gun… i’ll kill him for you. and then you can have lila back. i’ll let the two of you go.” you promised, slowly rising up to your feet, extending your hand.
and just as she pointed her gun down, you tackled her, taking the weapons from her and throwing them aside as she fought against your hold.
“reid!” you called out for your work mate, who quickly came to you and handcuffed maggie, who just started crying and begging for you to kill her.
“i gave her everything…”
you looked at spencer, wiping off the blood from your eyes.
“and that’s why we need to stay professional.”
-
“are you okay, pretty girl?” morgan came to you as the paramedics wiped clean your wound.
“yeah, they say i have a light concussion. a couple of stitches and i’ll be alright.” you gave him a small smile.
“what happened in there, huh? we only got what the paparazzi had on camera, which is…” you nodded.
“yeah. well, maggie got into the house with lila’s spare keys, and basically almost killed me. it was good luck that spencer kissed lila, or else i don’t know what i would’ve done.” the rest of the team had gathered around you.
“you did good. spencer told me how you got into her head.” gideon said.
“thanks.” you responded.
“make sure you’re on the clear before getting up. we’ll be right back, gotta fill in the other officers.” hotch informed you, to what you nodded.
they all left except spencer, who silently looked at you.
“i’m sorry.” spencer said, looking at his feet. “this shouldn’t have happened, if i hadn’t…”
“… played barbie?” you finished off for him, catching his attention. “look spencer. i don’t really care about it. it’s your life and you make your own decisions, just… make sure to not put any of us in danger while doing it. even lila. one of us three could have died tonight.” he nodded. you reached on your back pockets, pulling out the films of the paparazzi’s camera. “i guess this is yours.” he called out for you once again, probably to apologize one more time, but you were still pretty shaken up and you were still pretty mad at him. “would you mind? my head is killing me.” you asked of him and he nodded, silently turning around and walking its way towards morgan and emily. your mind went back to her words the moment the needle punctured your skin. oh ‘come on, really? do you really not feel it?’ ‘there’s this weird tension in between the two of you.’. and then back to jj’s. ‘it’s like when two little kids like each other and they don’t know how to show it so they just mess with each other’. you couldn’t help but chuckle.
you liking spencer? no way.
if there was anything you felt for spencer reid that was hate.
-
a/n; im so excited for this series!!!! so much angst and fluff and smut yet to come!🤭
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moonstruckme · 1 year ago
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Omg Mae more Spence please!! I love him ❤️❤️ what about the team is out at the bar after a case and some guy is flirting with reader and not taking no for an answer and spencer steps in even tho it’s out of character for him bc he’s so so jealous
Thanks for requesting :)
cw: minor assault, fictional confirmation that most guys are douchebags
Spencer Reid x bau!reader ♡ 926 words
“Right,” JJ says, “so Henry had actually been trying to say ‘fork,’ but of course everyone heard ‘fuck.’” 
You double over, laughter bubbling to the surface even easier than usual with the help of the couple of drinks you’ve had. Garcia has far surpassed you, tears leaking from her eyes as Morgan all but holds her upright. 
“And Will’s mom was…” JJ shakes her head with a smile, taking a sip of her drink. “Well, she was pretty upset. She accused Will of using that language around Henry, because she said he’s always had a potty mouth.” 
“Will?” Garcia cackles. “Our sweet southern beaux? There’s no way.” 
“I don’t know,” Emily muses. “I can see it. But he wouldn’t do it around Henry, for sure.” 
“Actually,” Spencer pipes up, “studies show that many children pick up swear words regardless of their parents’ usage. Even if they don’t know what they mean, most have a vocabulary of thirty to forty offensive words by the time they start school.”
The humor drains from JJ’s face. “Like, kindergarten?”
“Sometimes earlier,” Spencer says, before seeming to realize JJ finds these facts more alarming than fascinating. “I’m sure Henry will have a higher vocabulary than that by the time he gets to that age, though.” he adds hastily. “Probably won’t even need to resort to swear words.” You grin at him, laying your head on his shoulder consolingly. You might not have done it if you were completely sober, but right now it feels like the most natural thing in the world, and Spencer only tenses for a second before relaxing.
It’s Garcia who notices first, stiffening and straightening in her seat, but Hotch is the one to ask, “Can we help you?”
“I think so,” drawls a voice from behind you. “You can give me your friend’s number.”
You turn, finding yourself too close to the man standing with his hand presumptuously on the back of your chair and grinning like your agreement is a done deal. 
“Thanks,” you say, not unkindly, “but I’m not looking for anything.” 
The man tilts his head as if to say come on. “But don’t you just love when you find it anyways?”
“I’m here with my friends.” 
“And I’m not asking you to leave them.” He moves his hand to your shoulder, undeterred when you lean away. “Just give me your number, and next time you can be here with me.” 
“She said she’s not interested.” Emily’s voice is hard. If this guy weren’t so unpleasant, you’d be impressed that he’s still here, with your whole team staring daggers at him. 
The douchebag only smiles. “She didn’t say that, though. Did you, sweetheart?”
Your blood runs hot at his disregard of Emily. A man like this, you know—the assertive, overly masculine type—can be dangerous to piss off. But so can you. “I’m not," you say, finally letting the disgust you’ve been holding back seep into your voice. “Leave us alone.” 
Anger sparks in the man’s eyes, just like you knew it would. You don’t expect your gaze looks much different. His grip on your shoulder tightens as he gets in your face, close enough for you to smell the alcohol on his breath. “I know you don’t mean that.” 
You tense, ready to shake him off you and drag him back to whatever musty corner of the bar he’d come from, but Spencer beats you to it. 
“Okay, that’s enough,” he says, prying the fingers from your shoulder. You stand, a protective instinct moving you in front of Spencer, but he pushes past you, badge outheld. “FBI. Do you really wanna pursue this? Because if so, I’ll have no problem cuffing you and explaining it to the local police.” 
The guy makes like he’s going to dart for you again, but Spencer steps in his way, pushing him back with a hand on his shoulder. His voice is quiet but clear. “Do not touch her.”
“Fuck off,” the guy shakes Spencer’s hand off, stalking away. He’s drunker than you thought, wobbling his way back to the bar. 
“Spence,” you say, taking his hand as though mere contact with the man’s shoulder could hurt it. “You didn’t have to do that, I could have handled it.” 
“You shouldn’t have to,” he replies, pulling back the collar of your shirt distractedly. His fingers skim over tender skin, and you look down to find your shoulder is red where the man had gripped it. It’ll probably be a bruise tomorrow. Spencer’s eyes darken. “I can still arrest him. That’s assault.”
“It’s fine.” You move your shirt back into place, pulling him back to your seats. “I’m fine, really. Sorry about the scene, guys.” 
“You’ve got nothing to apologize for,” Hotch says severely, still eyeing the man from across the room. 
Morgan lets out a low whistle, relaxing back into his seat. “Way to go, wonder boy. Got a little jealous there, did we?”
Spencer lets out a little laugh, though it sounds more strained than usual. “I just did what all of us wanted to do.” 
“Agreed,” Emily says gruffly, toasting with her beer. “I thought I was going to have to go all the way around the table to kick that guy’s ass.” 
You laugh. “I appreciate the support, but I can take care of myself, you know.” You adjust your collar self-consciously, and as soon as you drop your hand back to your lap, Spencer’s taking it in his under the table. 
“Yeah,” he says casually, thumb stroking soothingly at your wrist. “We know.”
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rainydayathogwarts · 6 months ago
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Curtain call - Spencer Reid
Summary: You're an actress. Opening night of the show, a cast member is killed. FBI finds out you were the real target... Warnings: mentions of blood, a kiss 2k wc
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Adrenaline rushes through you as you run through the wings, catching your breath as you made your way across the backstage. You had just about a minute until you had to be on stage once more, the big number now coming to its end. Rushing into the costume room, you barely acknowledge the one thing obviously wrong with the messy space until you reach for your next costume on the rack, moving all other clothes aside to find it. There’s something inappropriate about your outfit. One, there isn’t supposed to be any blood on it yet there it is, a bloody handprint, running all the way to the bottom of your dress. That’s when your eyes trail down to the bottom of the clothing rack, where you get a clear look of the body lying underneath the row of clothes. Blood was soaking through her entire costume and her skin was turning blue. It’s only when someone runs into the changing room at risk of missing your cue that you hear a gut-wrenching scream. Later, you’d be told that it had come from you. 
Being called into the theatre the next day for “mandatory debriefing” was not what you had expected after such a traumatic experience, but you came in nonetheless, afraid of losing the job after the scene you had caused the night before. After screaming bloody-murder, half the cast ran into the changing rooms to find you hysterically crying over your cast mate’s body, holding her cold hand. The audience had been scared half to death, and after the authorities made it onto the scene, everyone was evacuated out of the theatre. By finding her body, you had cost everyone a night of the show. 
But once you got to the theatre, angry yellow tape cutting off access to the public, you were approached by a handsome man with a serious face and confident posture, offering you his hand even as he walked towards you. “Miss L/N? It’s nice to meet you, I’m Agent Morgan with the FBI, and this is Dr. Reid. We just have a few questions we would like you to answer for us.” Agent Morgan had been a very kind man, who told you every formality that was written in the book, however the man he had introduced to you as Dr. Reid caught your attention in a way you weren’t aware would be good or bad. Dr. Reid stayed silent as Agent Morgan questioned you, deeply staring at you as you answered all that was thrown at you, shooting you quizzical looks every now and then and glancing down at your fidgety hands. 
“Thank you so much for all this Miss L/N, that’s all our questions.” As Agent Morgan began to stand, Dr. Reid looked up at you, “Actually, I do have a few more if you don’t mind.” Agent Morgan shot his partner a confused look, slowly backing down into his seat once more. “Do you know why Evelyn was in the costume room when she was? With my limited understanding of the play, I was under the impression that her character didn’t have any costume changes up to the point you had gotten to before she was killed.” And then those that followed:
“Was anyone other than you supposed to be in the changing rooms at that moment?”
“Is there anyone in the cast who has taken a specific liking or dislike towards you?” 
“Can you remember any specific encounters with anyone as you were going in or out of the theatre?”
“Have you received any eye catching letters from fans recently?” 
Finally, Dr. Reid’s prying had gotten you somewhere, leaving you more terrified than ever, with Agent Morgan reassuring you “It’s just a theory that Dr. Reid has, so we’re only taking precaution. There’s nothing to worry about just yet.” The two agents drove you back to your place where you led them to the cursed fan-letter drawer in your study. "I don't usually read them because there are so many." You admitted, crossing your arms tightly over your torso, observing as the doctor starting frantically pulling letters out of the tidied drawer, eyes briefly scanning the name on the front of each envelope. He threw several to the side, dropping the rest onto the floor after reading the name until nearly ten minutes later, all the letters laid on the floor.
Dr. Reid scrambled to gather the letters he had tossed to the side, standing up hurriedly. You stared at the pile in his hands, glancing back up at the two men for an explanation. "These are all sent from the same person. I'd like to read them and see if I can analyse the language used. I think one of us should stay here with you for the mean time." You nodded at Dr. Reid's words, briefly looking over to his partner for confirmation. "I think Reid should stay here as he looks over the letters." He moved his attention from you to Dr. Reid "You can ask her any questions you might have and it'll be good protection." The partners nodded to each other and almost instantly, Agent Morgan exited the room.
Dr. Reid's hand came up before hesitantly placing it on your shoulder. "Do you mind if I get settled here? Ask some questions?" You shook your head silently before asking "Um, since you'll be here awhile, can I get you something? Coffee?" Dr. Reid nodded, muttering a quiet "That would be lovely." You don't know what it was: maybe the fact that he was here to protect to or trying to save your life, but felt your heart beat in your chest aggressively, as though trying to break through your skin. You brought him coffee, sugar and packets of cream on the side just in case and watched in awe as he emptied out the small cup of sugar. Sweet, just like him.
"Dr. Reid-" "Spencer. Please." You nodded, scooting your chair closer to him as he took a sip of coffee. "Did I make a mistake by not reading these?" The envelopes made loud unfolding noises every time he pulled a letter out of a different one, and he shook his head. "No. I know I wouldn't open so many of these and I have an IQ of 187." You grinned, your chest bubbling with a giggle. Spencer perked up at the sound of your laughter, smiling gently at you. He wasn't trying to joke around, but he was happy to uplift your mood. He studied all the letters laid out in front of him, and immediately noticed a pattern.
'02.02.18, I saw you in Oliver! today, you make an amazing Nancy.'
'14.02.18, I watched you in Oliver! again. You somehow get better the more I see you on stage.'
'07.03.18 I loved you today in the show. I watched the evening show. Did you see me too?'
'17.03.18 I saw your show again. I can be your Bill Sykes if you'd let me."
'11.04.18 I've been waiting anxiously to see you again since Oliver stopped touring. You make a wonderful Veronica.'
'15.04.18 We can be Seventeen together! Let me be your JD.'
"This isn't good." Without any further explanation, he pulled his phone out, dialling a number. "He's using obsessive language and saw her in Oliver! and Heathers, both of which have abusive partners who either kill or try to kill who Y/N's playing. You need to go visit his address right now." Coincidentally, just as he hangs up the phone, your doorbell rings. Your blood runs cold and you stand up instantly, but Spencer steps in front of you, blocking you from going anywhere. "Stay behind me, but stay close." He mutters, pulling his gun from his hostler. Spencer watches you closely, and the profiler in him notices how your breath begins to speed up and your eyes glaze with tears.
One of his hands comes up to cup your cheek and he whispers "Breathe. I'm right here so no one's going to hurt you, okay?" You nod, staying as close as you can to him without touching him until you get to the front door. He peeks through the peephole and his shoulders drop as an "Oh." Escapes him. He opens and closes the door faster than you can register, now holding another letter in his hand, identical to all the ones scattered on your desk.
Six words are written on the letter when Spencer opens him, and his face pales. It was meant to be you. Spencer grabs your hand, dragging you back into your study - the one room in your house with no windows. He locks the door, pressing numbers on his phone again before it's against his ear. "It's definitely him, he just sent another letter. We're in her study but he might be around the premises or returning to his house. I don't plan on getting her out of the study until you get him." The second the words leave his mouth you're processing them, and tears are welling in your eyes once more.
The sound of sniffling gets his attention back to you and his hands are gently coming up to your shoulders, leading you to sit down in a chair. "I'm scared." You whisper helplessly, looking up at the doctor. He crouches down to your level, and hand on your knee. "Hey, what did I say before?" He looks at you intently waiting for an answer. "No one's gonna hurt me." Spencer nods, a soft smile gracing his features. "Yes, exactly. No one's going to hurt you. I have an excellent team looking for that son of a bitch as we speak and I am right here with you."
You nod, not entirely convinced, which he can apparently tell, so he continues with "Come on, look at these muscles. You think anyone will get to you when I have these babies?" His tongue pokes out slightly as he flexes his arms, which are actually more toned than you realise. You laugh again and feel yourself launching your body at him before you can stop yourself, pulling him into a tight hug. He hesitates, but eventually, his arms are pulling you even closer to him, one hand rubbing circles on your back to soothe you. You break the hug, but before you can help yourself, you realise you're leaning into him, pressing your lips against his in a passionate kiss. To your surprise he immediately returns the kiss, his hands cupping your face as he deepens the kiss.
He's panting when he pulls away from you, whispering "This is unprofessional. I'm sorry, I like you, I do, but I shouldn't." Cocking your head to the side, you can't help but smile slightly. "It's only unprofessional for one of us so technically it's not unprofessional at all." His face twists in confusion as he tries processing your words. "That's not how it wo-mmph." the rest of his words are muffled by the second kiss you give him, which you feel him melting into as one of his hands comes to rest on your hip. "After- after the case. After the case, I'll take you on a date." His face falls at his own words, his face reddening in embarrassment. "That is- I mean that's only if you want. I wouldn't take you on a date if you didn't want to, that's totally fine."
The door to the study slams open just as he finishes rambling and you scream in fear, tightly gripping Spencer's hand and turning around expecting to find a middle aged balding creep, only to find a much sexier bald man, putting his gun back in his hostler. "Did you not hear us screaming for you? We thought he might have gotten to you before we found him. Ms. L/N, you're safe, we found him." Agent Morgan's gaze slowly trails to where your hand tightly grips Spencer's, and when he sees the flush on Spencer's face he makes a "Huh" noise, before walking out of the room once more.
taglist: @ineedtosusoutmyreadinglist
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nickynclark · 8 months ago
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I'D BE ONE NOCTURNAL SON OF A GUN
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Eddie Munson x Female! Reader
Word Count: 2,748
Content warning: SMUT (18+ only below the cut), no use of (Y/N), lowkey toxic parents, harsh language, mentions of drug use (mary jane, bby), mentions of reader being on birth control, oral sex (m and f receiving), unprotected p in v sex (wrap it before you tap it for the love of god), choking and breeding if you squint.
Summary: Your parents hate Eddie Munson, and you just can't find it in you to leave the crazy haired freak.
Authors Note: Y'all this is porn with plot. And it's my first ever smut so pls be nice to me. I'll be publishing a Spencer Reid fic soon enough ;) Love ya! - nick
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Growing up, you were a perfect child. You did ballet and took piano lessons. You ate all of your vegetables. You got straight A’s. You played nicely with the other children.
So you can imagine your parents’ reaction when their perfect little girl told them about her friendship with Eddie Munson.
“That freak?��� Your mom gasped, “my god, you must be joking.”
“Are you doing drugs with him?” Your dad quickly intervened.
You sat in front of them like a kicked puppy, quietly looking at your hands as they lectured you over Eddie.
You and Eddie met your freshman year of high school in chemistry class. He wasn’t good at english or science, and you were. You would help him do his homework (aka give him your answers) and he would let you sit with his odd ball friends at lunch. To you, rumors and all, he was lovely.
You two had been best friends for a long time, despite your parents' distaste. They even decided to set you up on a date with Steve Harrington your senior year: a sad attempt to separate you and Eddie.
It only lasted a week or two, and when you explained the situation to Steve, he understood. He was kind and promised to never let your parents know you even broke up.
“I could tell,” Steve said on your last date, “your head is always somewhere else. No sweat.”
To your parents, you are back to their perfect daughter. But everyday after school, when your parents think you're at a study hall, you're in the little room with a group of ‘freaks’, Eddie wearing the crown.
***
Eddie displayed the table in front of him, with only two characters left standing- yourself and Vecna.
“There is nothing wrong with running, sweetheart." Eddie's tone is cocky, "You can walk away now, everything will be okay.”
You squint up at him, “when have you ever known me to run?”
Eddie just laughs, signature smirk on his lips, “then roll.”
You grab the twenty sided die, fondling it in your hand. You roll the die between your fingers, a focused look on your face.
“C'mon! Just walk away,” Mike whispered, “if you roll then you can lose. Walking away isn’t a loss.”
“Shut up, Freshy,” you smile and elbow him in the side, “you’ve only been with me through one campaign. I never run away.”
You bring the die up to your lips and blow on it, keeping eye contact with Eddie through the process. He keeps his signature smirk on his face, but his eyes are nervous.
With a final smile, the die leaves your hand, rolling across the table, clambering it’s way down.
When it stops, Eddie looks down with a smile on his face, “natural twenty, sweetheart," he looks back up to you, "that's a hit."
The group at the table erupted into cheers, Dustin laughing at Eddie while pointing aggressively.
“Well done, Princess.” Eddie smiles and sits back in his throne.
**
After all the boys clear out, it’s just you and Eddie in the Hellfire room. Eddie let his smile falter as soon as they were gone; you knew he hated to lose a campaign, but it was always a little easier on him when you were the last man standing.
You walk towards him and stand in between his spread knees, “hi,” you look down at his slumped body, “hell of a campaign, you know. I was convinced I wasn’t going to roll right, you know my luck.”
Eddie looks at you shyly, “I know, Sweetheart. But I was really expecting a loss from you guys.”
“You always are, Eds.”
He smiles and sits up a little bit, “you’re right,” then he shifts himself to lean closer to you, “how’s Harrington?”
You step back from him with a small smile, “Done. He couldn’t handle me.”
Eddie sits up all the way, smirking, “no one can, Princess,” his hands lift to rest on your hips, “except me, my Queen of Hellfire.”
You laugh, “it was my call, though. He wasn’t my guy.”
“How so?”
You step back up into him looking down at him, “he’s not tall enough, he doesn’t have enough tattoos,” Eddie begins to stand up to tower over you, “he doesn’t smoke, and, most of all,” you move your hand to his hair, his face inches away from yours, “he doesn’t have good enough curly hair.”
Eddies breath hitches in his throat, clearly nervous and excited, and, when you almost gave in, your parent’s voice came into your head.
You back up from him reluctantly “It was a great campaign, Eds.”
And you walked out of the room listening for Eddie to call for you, but he never did.
**
Two days later, your parents were at church while you stayed home. Around 10 o'clock that morning, you heard a knock on the door. You quickly pulled your hair back and went to the front door. When you opened it, you were shocked to see Eddie standing in front of you, hair disheveled, still in his flannel pajama bottoms and a crinkled white shirt, smelling of weed and a his woody cologne.
He looked down at you as if you were a stranger before speaking, “why did you do that?”
“Eddie, why did I do what?”
“Friday. After Hellfire. Why did you do that?” He reached his hand up to rest on your cheek, “did you not know what you do to me?”
You stutter out an apology, “Eds, I’m so sorry. I didn’t know it would upset you-“
“Upset me?” Eddie laughed, “Sweetheart, I need to know if it was a play. Did you mean what you said?”
You look into his chocolate eyes before finally giving in, lean into his warm touch, “yes, Eddie, god, yes, I meant every word.”
And then he kissed you.
The kiss was bruising, and the entire time you couldn’t stop thinking about how bad you needed to know how he tasted, and now you knew: a beautiful mix of mint and herb.
As you pulled away panting, he rested his forehead against yours.
“My parents will kill me if they see you here,” you tell him quietly through kisses.
He picked you up bridal style, kissing your forehead and whispering “I won’t let them,” while he carries you upstairs to your room.
You planted gentle kisses to his neck until he dropped you onto your bed, leaning over you and kissing you roughly. As he kissed you, his hands found their way to your hips and yours around his neck.
“Fuck, Princess, I’ve waited for this for too damn long,” Eddie whispered into your neck where he was sucking and biting, attacking the soft skin connecting your neck and shoulder.
You started to tug on his hair, “Eds,” and he pulled up and looked at you, “you are my perfect person.”
He smiled softly and kissed your lips, hands finding your pajama shorts and slipping his pinkie underneath the band, touching more of your bare hips. Your back arched up into his grip as his rings chilled your skin, and he smirked into your kiss.
“Eddie, please,” you whine to him.
“Please what, sweetheart?”
“Anything, Eddie, please.”
Eddie looks up at you before his hands fully grip your waistband, “are you sure?”
You lift your hips, begging, “yes, Eddie, god yes, please.”
He smirked, pulling down your sleep shorts, “easy, Tiger.”
As soon as your shorts are down your legs, you are pulling off the lace thong that conceals you from him.
When he notices this, he’s sliding down to the foot of your bed, grabbing your ankles and pulling you down with him. He makes easy work of spreading your thighs, smiling as he sees your already wet pussy.
“Damn, Sweetheart, is all of this for me?” He mumbles as he moves his hand up to spread your lips, getting a better view.
You whine at the contact, “yes Eddie, all for you.”
Eddie starts to plant open mouthed kisses on the inside of your thighs while he slowly slides one of his ringed fingers inside of you, watching you wiggle at the sensitive contact. He starts to suck deep purple bruises onto your thighs as he inserts another finger, quickly curling and scissoring them, smiling as you moan loudly at his doing, your hands finding their way to his hair.
“Eddie, god, babe, your mouth, please,” you whine loudly, causing him to bite down on your thigh.
“You want my mouth, darling? Want my tongue?” You whimper in response, “Words, baby.”
You huff loudly, “yes, Eds, I need your mouth on me.”
He licked a thick stripe up your opening to your clit, moaning at the taste. He took your clit it into his mouth and started sucking lightly, causing you to see stars.
He continued to eat you out like his life depends on it, his fingers finding their way back inside of you, working you closer and closer to your orgasm.
He adds one more finger, stretching you out so fully arounds his three large digits, and licking and sucking so feverishly you don’t know how much longer you can last.
“Eddie, baby, fuck-“ you moan, grinding on his tongue, “I’m going to cum. Fuck, can I come? Should I even be asking you?”
Eddie laughs at you rambling, sending a vibration through your pussy up to the knot in your stomach.
He keeps working you until your thighs are shaking and trying to close around his head. He works you into a mewling mess, and only then does he pull away just enough to say, “come on my tongue, princess.”
His lips reconnect with you, working you through your high, your moans loud until you finally come to a stop.
Eddie climbs up your body, kissing you feverishly, and you taste yourself on his tongue.
“Baby, you’re so sweet. Could eat you out forever.”
You smile and kiss him, sitting up, “your turn.”
He stands up, and you sink to your knees in front of him. He watches happily as you work his pants off of him, your eyes growing at the print of him in his boxers. He was long and thick, and had a glorious spot of pre-cum on the fabric. You connect your lips to the wet spot, moaning at the salty flavor.
“Sweetheart,” Eddie placed a hand on your cheek pulling you away from him, “we can stop at any time. You don’t have to do this.”
You smile up at him from your knees, “I want to. Stop worrying.”
He looks down at you lovingly, swiping your cheek with his thumb, “then, as much as I love how it looks on you, that hellfire shirt’s got to go.”
You raise your arms as he pulls it off of you, groaning at the sight of your braless chest.
You quickly pull down his boxers, admiring the beautiful cock in front of you. It’s thick and even longer than it looked when concealed. It has a vein running along the side of it, and his tip is a pretty pink color with a bead of pre-cum leaking out of his slit.
You lean in and place a quick kiss to his tip before taking it into your mouth, sucking softly on his cock, then quickly pulling off.
“Of course your cock would be pretty too,” you smile before licking a stripe underneath him, then taking him into your mouth until he hits the back of your throat.
He moans loudly, his hands gripping your hair as you settle on a tempo, occasionally popping off to breathe or spit onto his dick.
“Sweetheart, holy hell,” Eddie moans as you look up at him as innocently as you can with a mouth stuffed with his cock, “I can’t tell if you came from, fuck, heaven or hell with that mouth. I could have had this this entire time?”
You hum around him in agreement, causing him to moan again.
After a little while of constant sucking, a sore jaw, and hands gripping his thighs, he stills your head and begins fucking your face.
You gag around him at the intrusion, then you settle into the pace, meeting him half way.
“Fuck, darling, I won’t last. Sweetheart, god fuck-“ he pulls away from me before he’s able to finish.
“Why’d you-“
He smiles, “ I want to cum inside you for our first time,” he rushes over to his pants and feels the pocket, “shit. I left my wallet at home, do you have condoms?”
You shake your head quietly.
He sighs, “it’s okay, I’ll just-“
“I'm on the pill.”
He smiles, “you sure?” And you nod.
As he climbs on top of you, with a panicked look, he starts, “you promise this isn’t some weird way of getting child support out of me? ‘Cause selling weed doesn’t exactly pay the-“
You laugh loudly, “Hey, Eddie?”
“Hey, baby?”
You look at him with doe eyes, “wanna fuck me?”
He groans loudly, “God, I thought you’d never ask.”
He climbed on top of you, spreading your legs apart and lining his dick up with your slick hole, “you ready, sweetheart?”
You smile softly, “yes, please.”
As soon as you feel the tip of him slip inside of you, a loud moan leaves your lips, your eyes widening and your hands gripping Eddies back.
He rests his head on your shoulder, leaving soft kisses on your neck, “I know baby, I know. Tell me if it’s too much.”
He slowly pushes in further until he’s all the way inside of you, then he stills to allow you to adjust to his size.
His teeth sink into the skin of your neck as he grunts, "you're so tight, Baby."
You whimper at the praise, “God, Eddie, move, please god, fuck me.”
He didn't need any more convincing. His hips suddenly snap in and out of you with fever. The sound of skin hitting skin and your moans mixing together fills your small room.
Eddie bites and sucks on your chest, moaning at the sensation, “fuck, princess, 's like you were made for me. Can’t wait to ruin this sweet pussy of yours.”
As Eddie keeps talking, fucking you harder and faster, your head is spinning with ecstasy, moans slipping out of your mouth faster than you can stop them, until, quickly, Eddie pushes one of your knees to your chest, pushing himself even deeper inside of you.
“Fuck, Eds. Right there, baby! Shit!”
Eddie moves one of his hands to your throat, pounding into you rapidly, showing no mercy to your body.
“Eds, fuck! I’m gunna cum, can I please fucking cum?” Your moans echo around the small room.
Eddie holds onto you tightly, his thrusts becoming sloppy and irregular, “hang on, sweetheart, I’m almost there,” he thrusts quickly, “where do you want it?”
You drag your nails down his back, “inside me.”
“Are you sure?”
You moan, “yes! Eddie, please! Fill me up with your cum, please!”
He groans and thrusted once or twice more, “cum, baby, cum with me.”
The knot that built in your stomach untied as you felt hot spurts of cum filling you up. You let out loud whimpers of ecstasy while Eddie rocked you through it, whispering sweet praises into your ear.
As you finished, he rolled off of you, laying next to you on your bed.
“Wow.”
You giggle in agreement, “definitely wow.”
Suddenly, the front door slams open, “honey, we’re home!”
Your mom shouts through the house, causing you and Eddie to scramble getting dressed.
Your mom walked in just as you both got clothed, sitting on the bed with a magazine and him messing with his guitar pick necklace.
“Hi,” you say gently, as if Eddies cum wasn’t leaking out of you onto your light pink bed spread beneath you.
“Honey," her tone is sickly sweet, "what is he doing here?” She smiled tightly.
“Oh, him?” You point to Eddie, “we’re just hanging out. He is my boyfriend you know.”
Eddie looks at you shocked before a smirk settles on his kiss swollen lips, and he reaches out to hold your hand.
Your mom looks at you, her smile now a glare.
“You can either leave this man, or never see the light of day again.”
Eddie stood up and grabbed his shoes, preparing to leave. His lips sat in a frown.
He thought this was over.
“Hey babe?” You grab his arm.
“Huh?” He looked at you confused.
You give him a quick kiss and your mom gasps, “I’ll see you at sunset.”
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Taglist: @ill-be-okay-soon-enough @deadbolted
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mordredisacoolname · 3 months ago
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CRIMINAL MINDS CHARACTERS - JEALOUSY
Male reader (can be read as gn)
The characters and jealousy before you're dating
Characters: Aaron, Emily, Derek, Spencer, JJ, Penelope, Tara, Luke, Elias
CW: mention of almost getting shot
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•Aaron hotchner
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-he doesn't get jealous easily
-when you talk with other men/women he doesn't mind at all
-especially if he personality knows the person you're speaking with
-even when someone flirts with you he knows they're not competition
-if you do start liking someone he does get a little jealous
-but he doesn't show it, he doesn't have any plans on starting a relationship with you
-if you're not a profiler he doesn't want you to be in danger because of him
-if you are one, he doesn't want to date a coworker
-so even if he gets jealous he won't show it or say anything
-but of course the others notice
-its very subtle but they are trained to study and notice behavior
-they don't dare tease him about it
-depends on who you're closer with on the team they will talk to you about it
-when you say you have feelings for him they will try to encourage you to say something to him
-david or Emily will probably hint him something in between the lines to not ignore his feelings
-so trying to get him jealous or be hard to get isn't gonna work, just talk to him
•Emily Prentiss
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-if you're both interested in each other, which you are, she will be flirting with you
-when knows you're interested
-emily won't try anything tho, she believes in not dating a coworker
-if you're not a profiler she still will be reluctant to start a relationship with you, afraid of commitment
-she cares for you deeply
-so she does get jealous
-she won't say it but she will show it
-they flirting will stop, and she'll be more formal with you
-you don't know what's wrong
-only when Derek ir jj, ir even pen tell you why's she acting like this you'll understand
-so you try joking with with her and pointing out her jealousy
-she gets the hint and plays along
-eventually you two meet up together and talk about it, like adults, and decide what to do
•derek Morgan
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-oh he flirts with you so much people already think you're dating
-so there's not much to be jealous about
-but if someone does show interest in you he'll observe from the side with an amused face
-laughing to himself first and then actually starts to worry you'll show interest in someone else
-so he kinda tones down the flirting with you because he thinks you no longer have feelings for him
-one day you ask him why's that and if you did something wrong
-he'll brush it off telling you everything's fine
-but you don't buy it
-you decide to go on a date
-but end up thinking about Derek the whole time
-so you confess to him
-he then explains he thought you had feeling for someone else and stopped with the flirting to not make you uncomfortable
•spencer Reid
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-you try flirting with him, but he doesn't get it
-so you think it's hopeless and stop
-you try ignoring your feelings for Spencer but it doesn't work
-so you decide to start dating, maybe you'll meet someone you like and forget about Spencer
-but it doesn't work, and you're so exhausted
-of course everyone on the team notices
-even Penelope sees how you look at Spencer, and how he looks at you
-derek gets fed up with this pining and decides to talk with Spencer
-but Spencer himself doesn't know he has feelings for you
-he describes to Derek what he feels everytime you talk to someone attractive and everytime you tell the team you went on a date
-he says he feels weird, a mix of sadness and anger
-so Derek tells him that feeling is jealousy
-spencer then starts paying more attention to this feeling, and your behavior
-of course once someone told him to pay attention to how you behave yourself around him he understands you too, have feelings for him
-so he gathers up the courage to ask you out, not on a date, but just to hang out
-he's weirdly shy and awkward
-usually he's very comfortable with you
-you ask him what's wrong, and he tells you
-they rest of the evening is up to you
•Jennifer Jareau
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-she denies her feeling for you, completely ignoring them
-once a deputy you're working with on a case starts flirting with you
-and that she can't ignore
-it distracts her from the case
-she's constantly thinking about you
-because of that she made a mistake and almost got herself hurt
-so she goes up to you at the end of the day, when the case is solved
-"um, you know, I was thinking maybe we could go out and get coffee before work tomorrow?"
-she avoids eye contact
-you of course agree
-the weather is exceptional, you two sit outside of the coffee shop, talking and looking at the view
-she tells you how she couldn't focus on the case
-you ask her why, after all it was a regular one, nothing special
-so Jeniffer tells you how she couldn't stop thinking about that deputy who wouldn't stop flirting with you, and how it made her angry
-you didn't think she liked you back
-so you're over the moon
•penelope Garcia
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-your relationship with pen always involved teasing
-little playful comments here and there
-it was fun, you liked it
-so when she noticed you getting closer to a fellow FBI agent from another department she got upset
-the snarky comments were no longer playful
-she was actually hurt, you didn't know what you did wrong
-you try asking her but she ignores you telling you you're just paranoid
-but you know she's lying
-you show up to her house one night, inviting yourself in
-she's surprised, did she forget you two had plans?
-so you tell her you know something's up and you won't leave until she explains herself
-she gets a little mad, you're so oblivious
-you're actually in shock
-penelope likes you back??
-but you thought she flirts with everyone of her friends
-you apologize, and she tells you there's no need, she should've been more forward
-so you decide to have a date, right here and now
•tara lewis
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-she doesn't get jealous
-if she doesn't think you have feelings for her she leaves you alone and understands you have the right to flirt with everyone you'd like
-but you give her signs
-maybe you do like her?
-she decides to just ask you, straight forward
-you confess to each other and decide on a date
-she's a very straightforward person, a d is not afraid to show her emotions
•luke Alves
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-you flirt, a lot
-but he won't make a move
-and given that he also kinda flirts with Penelope, tho not like he does with you, you don't think anything of that
-so you start dating someone
-he's at a loss of words when you tell him
-he pretends to be happy for you
-but you see there's something he's not telling you
-you decide to have a chat with Penelope
-"oh god you're like two teenagers" she acts annoyed (she secretly thinks it's cute)
-she tells the both of you separately to just talk to each other, confess your feelings
-you're both skeptical but she says to trust her and just do it
-so you do
-you go up to him and at the same time you tell each other you have something to say
-you confess first
-he's in shock, and you both start laughing
-it's safe to say your current boyfriend is no longer your boyfriend by the end of the day
•elias Voit (ok don't @ me he's too cute ik I'm not the only one)
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-you first hate him
-everything he's done
-when the team decides to work with him you're so mad
-you ignore him altogether
-but when he sees you for the first time he's locked on on you
-he will let everyone around you know he wants you
-you think he's just playing
-and it annoys you, because you can't help and fall for his charm
-one time your team needs help from him, some information
-so they send you to talk to him
-they moment he sees you he puts his game on
-he can't finish one sentence without a flirty comment
-you get fed up and tell him pretending to like you won't get him anywhere
-he says there's no reason for him to pretend, but you still don't believe him
-he finds it funny but is also kinda pissed
-one time when you use him as bait, you almost get shot, dodging the bullet only thanks to Elias
-you both look at each other, and at that moment you feel it
-you know he's not playing
-of you're so fucked
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deanscherrypie420 · 5 months ago
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ℙ𝕣𝕖𝕥𝕥𝕪 𝕘𝕚𝕣𝕝
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A/N: This is my first criminal minds fic but I figured I should cause I LOVE the show... I haven't watched the new season yet cause of personal reasons but, ya know, I'll get there. <3 I hope you enjoy
Characters: Spencer Reid, Reader Y/N, JJ, Emily Prentiss, Luke Alvez,
Pairing: Reader X Spencer
Warnings: Mentions of murder, interrogation, violence, angst, fluff, suggestive dialogue, arguing, praise kink, Dom/sub, age gap, implied smut, (6 years) (NO ACTUAL SMUT.) (Let me know if I missed anything!)
Summary: After taking you into custody, the team tries to get a confession out of you for a crime they suspect you committed. The only thing you seem to want is to play. They bring in Reid as a last resort, and you can't help but like him... Even if he is a pain in the ass.
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Y/N was walking around in the mall, stopping to check out Victoria Secret. She loved the store, the fragrances, the clothes, or lack there of. Lingerie made her feel pretty, and she loved it.
After selecting a few sets that she liked, along with a set of perfume and lotion, she went to the checkout. She opened her wallet and grabbed one of her many cards, handing it to the cashier with a smile.
"Thank you for shopping with us, have a lovely day." The woman told her, and she rolled her eyes. Once she left the store she took the escalator downstairs, making her way to the parking lot. When she arrived, she noticed the swarm of cop cars.
"Ironic." She told herself, keeping her head down and making her way to her car. She opened her passenger door and set the bag down. When she turned around, she was met by two agents.
"Y/N Y/L/N, you're under arrest for suspected murder, accomplice to murder, and grand theft." The taller man spoke, and she nodded, a small smile creeping onto her lips.
"How fun." She said as she put her hands behind her back, hiding a small blade within her sleeve. The man turned her around and pressed her against the car. Before he could inform her of her rights, she maneuvered the blade from its confinement and sliced the agent's wrist.
It wasn't meant to help her escape, but simply to vex the man. He grunted and slammed her harder against her vehicle, tightening the cuffs harshly around her wrists. She gasped and bit her lip, "That hurts!" She protested, but was quickly shut up by his partner. "Karma's a bitch."
She was led to a black SUV, a large hand covering the back of her head as she got in. The drive was quiet, she spent most of her time studying the agents. One was a blonde, slim, confident woman. The other was a brown haired, taller man.
She slouched down, moving her elbow to undo her seat-belt. Once it was off, she leaned forward and grinned. "Officer, do I get to keep my stuff?" She cooed in the man's ear. He looked back at her in the rear-view mirror and tsked in disapproval. "You got out of your seatbelt."
"Sit back, head against the headrest." The woman ordered. Y/N pouted her lip, falling back into her seat. "It's not like I have my hands. I can't hurt you." She complained, but she was ignored.
Ugh, so rude, she thought.
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Now, she was sitting alone in an interrogation room. She tilted back in her chair, her handcuffs binding her to the table. "I'm bored! Come on guys, where are you?" She shouted at the mirror, a sick smile on her face. "Play with me!"
She had already spoken to quite a few agents. She had fun with all of them, watching them get mad. Oh, how she loved it. Her smile only grew as a new woman came in.
"Oh goody! I love meeting new people." She feigned innocence, her tone high pitch and bubbly. "I'm Agent Prentiss. I'm assuming you know why you're here?" Her tone was gentle, like a parent soothing a child.
"Is this your new tactic? Baby me and hope I confess?" Y/N giggled, soaking up Emily's irritated look. "Y'know, you have a really bad poker face. You're pissed!" She broke out in a fit of laughter, swinging back in her chair and tilting her head back.
Emily abruptly left the room, taken aback by the young woman's demeanor. When she closed the door, she turned to her group. "Do you guys see this? We played all of our cards here. She's not gonna talk until we get something we can use."
Jennifer shook her head, rubbing her temples with her fingers. "We literally brought Daniel up, and she didn't flinch. How does that not affect her?" She sounded exasperated, so ready to be done with this case.
Suddenly, Spencer barged into the room. He seemed to be in a hurry, a file in his hand. "Let me. I think I can get something out of her." He asked quickly. Emily just nodded and motioned towards the door.
Y/N raised her eyebrows when he came in, kicking the chair in front of her out from beneath the table. "You're the guy from the car." She acknowledged, and he nodded.
"You're being held for suspected murder and theft. How do you feel about that?" He asked, and she thought for a moment. "Hmmm... I think it's awesome. What about you?" She teased, and he gave her a stern look.
She didn't know why, but she felt her stomach turn. She leaned back in her chair and scoffed. "You're no fun. Why are you here?" He shook his head and opened her file, not bothering to answer her.
"Hey, I asked you a question." She hissed, annoyance creeping in. "Answer me!" She whined, and he slammed his hand down on the table. "Shut up. Speak when I ask you to."
She felt her cheeks warm, embarrassment evident on her face. She bit down on her lip and kicked his legs beneath the table. "You're a douche." She muttered and he ignored her again, setting the file down and flipping it for her to see.
"Your accomplice is Daniel Turner, correct?" He questioned and she rolled her eyes, her turn to blow him off. He didn't let it slide though, standing and grabbing her face. "Correct?" He repeated, and she swallowed hard.
"Correct." Her voice was quiet now, polar opposite to what it was before. He smiled and sat back down. "Good girl." He praised. She froze, eyes locked on him. She felt a warm feeling pool in her core, overwhelming her. He, on the other hand, continued skimming through her file. He knew what he was doing.
The profile read dysfunctional family, so he knew she had some sort of parental issues. They had tried both approaches, Luke playing the role of the proud dad and Emily as the proud mother. It didn't work for either of them, so they abandoned the idea.
He didn't know why it wasn't obvious before, but an older man wasn't enough. Reid was thirty-two and she was twenty-six, but she wanted dominance. Luke had taken the soft approach and it didn't work, so Spencer decided to try it the other way around. So far, he was successful.
She bit her lip as she watched him, squirming slightly in her seat. She was hot and bothered, and tried to hide it. She knew it would be used as a leverage. What she didn't know, was that it already was.
"Stop moving." He ordered her, and she scoffed. "I'm sorry, these cuffs aren't exactly comfortable." She spat at him and he looked up at her. Quickly, he got up and pulled out the key. He removed her handcuffs and set them on the table. She was about to say something smug, but he was quicker.
"Lose the attitude." He paused then glanced down at her, "Also, you're cuffs have nothing to do with your legs. Don't lie to me again." That seemed to shut her up, her cheeks burning with red as she nodded. After a few minutes he set the file back down, flipping to a specific page. "You murdered this man, correct?" She looked down at the picture, her face subconsciously contorting in disgust. She quickly fixed her face, plastering a smile onto it. "I don't know, did I?" She teased and he glared at her.
It was a warning. A warning for her to change her tone or she'd be a bad girl. "Yes, sir." She mumbled and he raised a brow. Spencer shook his head and stood up to leave. "W-wait, where are you going?" She asked, the eagerness in her voice betraying her.
"I don't like liars, Y/N. Do you want to try that again?" He scolded, and she moved back in her chair. She knew she was supposed to be taking the blame for this, she was the cover-up, but she knew she wanted him more.
"I, uh, I do." Her eyes were glued to her feet, and he smiled. "Look at me when you speak." He told her, and she hesitated, but held eye contact as he sat down. "I didn't... I didn't do that." She motioned to the picture, not wanting to look at it again.
"But you know who did. Can you tell me?" His tone was different now. It was still stern, but it had a softer edge. He was coaxing the answering out of her, rewarding her good behavior by being gentle.
"No.." She shook her head slowly, now staring at the wall behind him. He raised a brow and frowned. "Why is that?" He prodded, and her teeth sunk into her lip.
She cleared her throat and tried to upkeep her tough demeanor. "I don't know anything. You don't have anything to charge me with so I want to leave." She held eye contact with him, and he gave a pity grin.
He raised his wrist and pulled down his sleeve, revealing the deep, crimson slice she had inflicted earlier. "Assaulting law enforcement is a charge, and if you don't cooperate I'll be sure to press that." He warned and she crossed her arms, leaning back in her chair.
Her cheeks were pink and she looked nervous, with more than just her current situation. "Talk to me." He said as he stood up and moved in front of her, kneeling down.
She choked on her words, tears beginning to well in her eyes. "I didn't know... I mean, I know now but I didn't know this is what he made me cover for. This c-could ruin my life." Her voice was barely a whisper, tears falling into her lap.
He reached up and wiped her cheek with his thumb, then carefully taking her hands from her lap and squeezing them. "We know Daniel did the digital work, who committed the murder." He questioned further and she broke.
She started crying, the most vulnerable they've seen her. She confessed everything she knew, Spencer occasionally having to calm her down so she could breathe.
After she spilled her guts, they had a name. Anthony Velasquez, 30 year old male. Spencer quickly got up, picking the file up to leave the room. She knew he would leave. but she felt used. She didn't know why.
Reid paused at the door and turned to her. "For your cooperation, you are free to go. You might have to stick around for a bit to answer more questions, though." She nodded and wiped her eyes, letting out a shaky breath.
He walked back over to her and helped her stand up before wrapping her in a tight hug. "You did great," He rubbed her back and cradled her head in his free hand.
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A few days had gone by since the incident. Y/N was home alone, laying in her bed and processing the last few days. Suddenly, her phone rang and she jumped.
She fumbled it in her hands for a moment before she pressed accept. "Hello?" She croaked, her throat dry. "Hey, it's Spencer. I was wondering if you wanted to go to dinner with me?" He asked casually. On the other end, he was at his desk, fidgeting with a pen.
"Oh. I mean, sure, yes. Yes, of course. Not of course, but yes, I would like that." She rambled for a moment, her cheeks warm. She was flustered and a bit nervous. She had assumed she was just another case, but maybe not...
"Okay great, I'll pick you up at eight. Text me the address. Bye." She didn't have to see him to hear his smile, which only made hers grow. "Okay, bye." She checked her home screen, realizing she only had two hours to get ready.
She had showered in record time, carefully selecting an outfit afterwards. She couldn't decide between two dresses. Both were red, and both ended at her mid-thigh. The only difference was the texture. One was silk, and one was covered in lace designs.
She walked to her mirror and pressed them to her body. She ended up deciding the lace dress, sliding it on and returning to the closet. She selected a matching pair of red heels and put them on, twirling in front of the mirror in triumph.
She then sat down at her vanity and brushed her hair out, painting her nails and doing her makeup. She hadn't been on a date in awhile, so she was a little nervous.
She felt pathetic, staring at her phone and waiting for him to arrive. Once it neared 8:15, she wondered if it was a joke, if he even liked her. She sat up on her bed and thought for a moment, her insecurities bombarding her mind.
All of her worries seemed to fade when she heard a knock at her door. She quickly made her way across the apartment, opening her door carefully. She was greeted by Spencer, he was wearing a nice suit and dress shoes.
She smiled and opened the door fully. "Hi, sorry. I forgot my bag, give me a second." She said as she turned away from the door, leaving it ajar. He stepped inside and looked around, finding her choice of decor adorable. He thought she was adorable.
She came back from her room, and he looked her up and down. She looked magnificent. "Sorry, I didn't know if it was a nice restaurant or not.. I feel like an idiot, I haven't been on a date in who knows how long. Sorry, I'm rambling, I get really nervous. I mean, I am really nervous. Not because you make me nervous, but I mean you do, but-" He cut her off, striding forward and cupping her face.
He kissed her. She froze for a second but quickly leaned into it. They stumbled back onto a wall and he caged her in, devouring her lips. She tasted heavenly, and he never wanted to let go.
She however, needed to breathe and gently pulled back. She giggled when she saw him, her red lipstick smudged all over his mouth. "What?" He questioned, and she reached up and swiped his lips. "You have my lipstick all over your face." They both laughed and he bit his lip, moving his hand to her mouth. His thumb pulled down her bottom lip and he smiled.
"Pretty girl." He whispered before leaning back down and connecting their lips again. He tapped her hip with his finger, letting her know he was about to pick her up, and he did.
She gasped and looked down at him, her hair falling down her shoulders. "What about dinner?" She breathed out, a smile spread across her face. He leaned up and kissed her, "I have a better idea." He murmured against her lips, his hands travelling up her back, pushing her dress up. He carried her to her bedroom, kissing up her neck. She gasped and ran her fingers through his hair, tugging at the strands.
He groaned and tossed her onto the bed, a loud yelp escaping Y/N, followed by a giggle. Spencer looked down at her and bit his lip, "You're so beautiful." He praised, climbing on top of her and claiming her lips again.
My pretty girl
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A/N: I didn't proofread yet, I just kinda rushed it. I COULDN'T HELP IT I WANTED SPENCER REID!! I hope you enjoyed, thank you for reading!
Follow, reblog, and like! Send requests <3
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railingsofsorrow · 3 months ago
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tiny
[spencer reid]
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summary: diana reid has her dad wrapped around her pinky
pairing: none
warnings/content: dad & daughter moments; minor character death (mentioned)
a/n: stay with this fluffy blurb with dad!spencer. I wrote this at 1am trying to sleep. sorry I've been MIA I've been really busy with uni :(
navi
masterpost
cm masterlist
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spencer is too absorbed in the doctor who's episode playing on tv to properly pay attention to his surroundings. but he does, either way, because the soft pitter-patter of small feet following to the living room in a rapid pace is engrained into his brain.
so when the small body of his five year old jumps on his stomach, causing him to let out a huff in mock surprise, he already knows the drill.
he knows all of diana's tells and quirks when she wakes up in the middle of the night.
“hi, tiny.”
the little girl squirms on top of him, pursing her lips in a pout that makes spencer wants to fit her in his pocket.
“'m not tiny, daddy.”
“okay.” his lips twitches as he attempts to fix her messy honey brown curls. it's foolish. she got his hair and that's a fact. “can't sleep? I just tucked you in.”
“it's been forty-five minutes and fourteen seconds, daddy.” she retorts, sitting up on his stomach to cross her arms to make her look invincible. “fourteen seconds when I leave my bed.”
“when you left your bed?” spencer corrects her english while adjusting her winnie the pooh pajamas because it's all crooked.
ever since she learned how to count and how to learn the time — spencer taught her the latter one time when they were waiting in the doctor's office and she just kept asking every time she saw a clock on the wall — she's been ready to tell him whenever he's late to pick her up from school or literally use it as an argument to prove he's wrong about something.
“are you not sleepy anymore?”
she gives him a tight-lipped smile he feels like looking in the mirror every time. “no.”
spencer bops her nose and pats his chest. she lays down with a giddy smile, curling up against his chest, half her body resting against the couch. spencer remembers when she was too tiny he was scared she would fall off if he as much as moved an inch.
his heart pinches at the thought that his little girl is growing up.
“daddy,” diana whispers, he knows a request is coming.
“mhm?”
“play that episode?”
spencer stretches his arm with difficulty to grab the remote. they may have watched the episode around twenty seven times, but she loves it and he can't say he's tired. if anything, it will help her to sleep again.
“can we light a candle for grandma tomorrow?”
spencer is rubbing her back soothingly and he can feel she's about to drift off when she asks the question. we light a candle for the ones who have passed, so we talk to them. it helps when we miss them. he told diana once when she was trying to grasp the fact that some people that used to be around her were no longe there. she doesn't fully get the concept of death yet, she's too young. but lighting a candle not only brings her comfort but provides it for spencer, too.
like an old friend once told him it would.
“do you want to do it now?” he asks, tone of voice bordering on a whisper to not disturb her.
diana usually holds two of his fingers when she's falling asleep. spencer read a study that toddlers often search for sensations familiar to them as babies. touching and skin-to-skin contact, for instance. these behaviours are a result of forming neural pathways and helping a child feel a sense of security.
she doesn't answer him, just holds his fingers with her tiny hands as her soft snores take over. he watches his daughter fall asleep with a soft smile on his lips, hands cradling her to his chest. at last, he kisses the crown of her head and turns his neck to watch the rest of the doctor who episode he already knows every line of.
diana doesn't wake up in the middle of the night again, she's fast asleep, drooling when he walks up to her bedroom before he goes to his.
he can't help but linger at the doorway, thinking about what he wants to say to his mom tomorrow when they light up the candle and if she would be proud of him today.
he hopes she is.
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snarkylinda · 1 year ago
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*steps onto stage, takes the microphone* Spencer is really easy to take advantage of not because he is naive, but because he craves affection to a point where it would drive him to.... circumstances.
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ma1dita · 8 months ago
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SET IT UP!
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spencer reid x HRT!reader (gender neutral)
(set between cm seasons 3 & 4, inspired by the netflix film 'set it up')
MINI-SERIES MASTERPOST
synopsis: (gender-neutral reader, nickname: ripley)
Everybody just wants to be good at their job—and you are, despite what your FBI-issued therapist says on her reports. It’s been two rotations since your mandatory medical leave and you’re itching to prove that you deserve to be back on the Bureau’s elite Hostage and Rescue Team (HRT).  After a run-in with Dr. Spencer Reid over a cup of shitty coffee, it’s clear that he’s in a similar test of will with the newly-returned SSA David Rossi. The both of you put your big brains together for some matchmaking and mayhem; and with a lot to prove and your jobs on the line—you’ll get what you want, whether anyone believes it or not.
status report: chapter 2 (in progress)
[case details]
warnings: brief depictions of drug & alcohol abuse, ptsd, grief, some gore related to cases/missions -> sfw, additional tags to be added -> canon compliant/inspired by movie 'set it up' on netflix & follows cm season 3&4 -> HEA! any works, updates, thoughts, musings, etc about this series will be tagged under #ripley!verse ! playlist character study : spencer reid character study: ripley (hrt!reader)
the four steps of marksmanship
i. ready your position [3x9: Penelope] ii. take your aim [3x16: Elephant's Memory] iii. breathe in, breathe out [3x20: Lo-Fi / 4x1: Mayhem] iv. give it your best shot [4x3: Minimal Loss] v. bullseye [epilogue; 4x24: Amplification]
a/n: biting the bullet here... not abandoning the trouble!verse but reminding yall i can write for other characters lmfao everyone thank @hotchfiles for enabling me
comment to be added/removed from taglist!
@the-tpd-bau @anomiatartle @koressecretidentity @marvelescvpe @iliketopgun @theadventuresofanartist @sarai-ibn-la-ahad @pleasantwitchgarden @person-005 @the-sylver-dragon @inlovewithfictionalppl @sp3ncelle @sunny747 @un-knownperson @ficmeouttahere @sweetpeterparker
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blackdollette · 1 year ago
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⊹ ࣪ ˖ 𝐥𝐢𝐯'𝐬 𝐥𝐢𝐛𝐫𝐚𝐫𝐲. ‎‎₊˚⊹ 𐦍༘⋆₊ ⊹
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#RULES!
what i will write.
i will primarily write rory culkin content on this blog, but i am now writing for miguel o'hara, spencer reid and the outsiders. i try my best to answer all requests that i get, unless they go against things that i write. i write 18+ content.
what i won't write.
incest, pedophilia, scat play, & watersports.
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#MASTERLIST!
kinktober masterlist.
be my valentine. ₊˚⊹♡: masterlist
☆ = nsfw
charlie walker.
if i cant have you, no one can. you & charlie stalking eachother. getting down with charlie. ☆ charlie's personal camgirl. ☆ pretty when he cries. ☆ subby charlie giving you head. ☆ trashy tutor session. ☆ trashier study session. ☆ prettiest girl he's ever seen. best friend. childhood crush.
euronymous.
dating euronymous hcs. giving euronymous head after a show. ☆ euronymous' fucktoy. ☆ meeting euronymous at a party. meeting euronymous at a party (part 2). ☆ admiring from afar. taking his virginity. ☆ bimbo and the beast. ☆ first time doing anal. ☆ little black bimbo. ☆ rough sex. ☆ throatfucking. ☆ gonna play with myself. ☆ ps girlfriend hcs. ☆ the shape of my body. ☆ threesome with dead. ☆ i'm the boss. ☆ friday night fight. grinding in the pale moonlight. ☆ cheater. ☆ loving you is hard, being here is harder. blessed with beauty and rage. private session. ☆ brother's best friend. ☆ sweetest melodies.
clyde.
dating clyde hcs. making edibles on a stormy night. crying on his shoulder. bathtime with clyde. ☆ intoxicated sex. ☆ sloppy sex. ☆ meet me at the diner. dating clyde hcs (again.) shotgun. ☆ taking his virginity. ☆ tired n sickly. ☆ fingerbanging at coachella. ☆ kissing behind the skate structure. do you want me or do you not? the bad girl next door. ☆ forever wild. ☆
jack thurlow.
having sex with jack. ☆ jack's worst addiction. jack's keepsake. ☆ your first time. ☆ your wife won't mind. ☆ hold me, love me, touch me. ☆ i need you. ☆ guided masturbation. ☆ sun & moon, december & june. let's ride. ☆ sad girl. a little party never hurt no one. dom x dom. ☆ somnophilia. ☆
ollie sway.
giving ollie a striptease. ☆ public sex. ☆ first orgasm. ☆ attempt to be dominant. ☆ watching me get undressed. ☆
kappa.
one night stand with kappa. ☆ a friendly visitor. caught masturbation. ☆ jealous girl. ☆ softcore babyface. (ft. dan cooper) ☆ don't forget me. ☆ got a knife in my shirt. ☆ my cult leader. ☆
dan cooper.
dan's first time using a toy. ☆ dry humping. ☆ two little bunnies. ☆ pegging danny. ☆ dan cockwarming. ☆ world's biggest whore. ☆ danny dom. ☆ feminization. ☆ softcore babyface. (ft. kappa) ☆ daisy chains. ☆
chris kenton.
friends with benefits. ☆ private dancer. ☆ truth or dare. ☆ blowjob. ☆ got me feeling so much. ☆
marcus (swarm).
putting him into subspace. ☆ that damn bowl of strawberries.
spencer reid. (criminal minds)
you wanna make the switch? ☆ heard that you like the bad girls.
more characters to be added.
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credits to ©444rockstargf.
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aliteralsemicolon · 3 months ago
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what do u think about Maeve as a character and as a love interest for Spencer?
Well she definitely exists. She was definitely a canon love interest 😐 I choose to forget a lot of details from that whole incident on purpose. Talking about this is just beating a dead horse bc I think my opinion is just a general consensus.
but here's what I think anyway:
The storyline
I won't talk about it for long because I feel like it's obvious, but the whole situation was handled so poorly. It kinda just showed up out of no where on one random peaceful day. What do you mean Maeve didn't want Spencer to get the BAU involved because 'it could endanger him'? Babe, he's already in danger just by being in a relationship with you, but I guess that just doesn't fucking matter. Also, what the fuck do you mean that Spencer just went along with it? I'm sorry? Spencer Reid, who becomes very impulsive when it comes to the wellbeing of his loved ones? He just agreed to sit back? Not even investigate in his free time?! By the time ZUGZWANG happens, we as viewers know how the BAU operates. The BAU was more than equipped to successfully deal with Diane. We know what they're supposed to do in a stalker situation, but for some reason they ignore nearly every goddamn protocol and then they're surprised when Maeve dies??
Maeve as a character
Listen, I don't dislike her because she was Spencers love interest. I'm actually somebody who's very keen on love interests for Spencer. I want that poor man to be happy. I dislike Maeve because she's one of the worst recurring characters on the show. She's very morally annoying. Not grey, annoying. Maeve is a geneticist. Geneticists, for the most part, study gene interactions and evolution. She has no fucking business diagnosing and prescribing shit from one look at an MRI scan. I don't even wanna talk about how medically inaccurate the migraine bit of the storyline is. Somehow it gets dumber. I don't know what she said for sure, but I know for a fact that she said something like she had to get to know Spencer because of how interesting he seemed. FROM HIS MRI SCANS?! Are we ignoring how unethical this is? Please, I cannot fucking do this. But there's more. Apparently she loves Spencer. She says as much at the end of a phone call AND literally writes that one love quote in the Narrative of John Smith for him. She loves Spencer, but fails to mention how she was engaged literally not long before she met him. And she doesn't feel an ounce of guilt or sadness when he ex-fiancé (whom she also supposedly loved) gets shot in the head in front of her? Also there's certain times where she just comes off as very emotionally manipulative, but in the dumbest way possible. The thing is that I don't even hate her because she's like this. Some of these things actually give the character potential to become a really interesting and complex character. It's because she tries to come across as the opposite. The writers try very hard to portray her as an intelligent, good and innocent character, but everything she does is very selfish and stupid. Personally, if I was a geneticist and some fucker reached out to me to ask about his MRI scans I would redirect him to a fucking neurologist or something.
Maeve as Spencer's love interest
She's introduced to us a mysterious woman over the payphone. We get glimpses of her body in a dark room and we watch her fiddle with things while walking around, but we don't actually get to see her face until later. Her voice is meek and sultry. If this sounds like some wattpad introduction then that's because that's literally what it is. Maeve is introduced to us in a very Y/N esc way. The whole relationship is very much wattpad story written by a 14YO back in the day. Wait I take that back, even fucking 14YO's writer better shit. At least their stories were worth ruining your sleep schedule for. I can't even be upset, Maeve is literally not the first female character portrayed this way on the show *cough* Jane Seaver *cough*. MGG didn't want Spencer to have a love interest so Maeve was written to die. I just wish they at least tried to do the characters and the story justice. Viewers couldn't even connect to Maeve because she was just thrown at us one day and then literally killed a second later. Even if she wasn't unlikable I find it very hard to imagine that I would've cared about her death, because I literally had no time to bond with the character. It's also just very awkward when she shows up after her death because I feel disconnected with Spencer's emotions. Mentally, I know that she's his first great love or whatever, but emotionally, I do not give a fuck. She does not match Spencer's freak. What she is, essentially, is a female version of Spencer (but through the male gaze because she's a woman so ofc she's slightly dumber and Y/Nified). Spencer is one of the most complex established characters on the show and Maeve as a partner for him is just very boring. And even if she's was interesting, I PERSONALLY FEEL LIKE the actors have no chemistry together. He's had more chemistry with love interests that lasted for a way shorter period than he does Maeve. Ironically, the most chemistry he has is with the one person he despises the most (Cat Adams) and I think that speaks volumes. God, I wish so badly that they utilised the bar tender he did a magic trick for or the forensic scientist in that bombing episode.
Again, I'm pretty sure most of the fandom feels this way. I'm fairly confident that I might have more to say, but I cannot be bothered anymore.
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