#today I woke up more character study than usual uwu

[snarkylinda]

*steps onto stage, takes the microphone* Spencer is really easy to take advantage of not because he is naive, but because he craves affection to a point where it would drive him to.... circumstances.

[dirt-apple-productions]

This megapost will be updated twice a day until NaNoWriMo 2021 is done. Minimal, microscopic spoilers for Seraphite. Alura, one of its predecessors, is available here and won NaNoWriMo 2019. Starwalker is still with betas atm, but should be out around February.

For those unaware, Seraphite is a post-canon story meant to redeem Shadow Weaver and condemn the glorified suicide that was portrayed in the show. I haven’t come up with a good synopsis yet.

Day 1: November 1, 2021

So far, things have been sailing smoothly. At the last minute, I decided to mess with the prelude letters and change the author entirely. I don’t normally do this, but I think it works because this is the final act in my trilogy.

I’m not used to writing Adora’s point of view. I’ve done multiple character studies on her, but because she’s the lead of She-Ra, she’s a bit tricky to write since there’s not a lot of wiggle room with her POV like Shadow Weaver and Micah. I’m sure I’ll get the hang of it soon, though.

This scene was very interesting to write. My intention was not for it to be erotic in any way (although some of my alpha readers interpreted it that way back when the idea was in the germinal stage). Rather, it’s supposed to show a “rebirth” of sorts, and in my opinion it fits very well with the title of Part 1: “Grave to Cradle”.

Right! My word count for today was 3,256 words.

Day 2: November 2, 2021

Well, today got off to a rough start. I woke up at 4:30 am and I’m downright miserable, but I still managed to write 1,418 words in my first session. A lot of it is garbled, emotional bullcrap about Catra, but at least I got the words on the page. Once I start Draft 2 I’ll be more judicious about writing when I feel like garbage.

On that topic: Catra. Although this fic is from Shadow Weaver’s POV as the lead, I wanted to show that not everyone forgave Shadow Weaver even when she chose to change. While I don’t think this is ideal - people should let go of grudges even if there’s no reconciliation - it does happen in real life, and one doesn’t have to be forgiven in order to be a better person. I also had a lot of beef with Catra’s arc in Season 5 and felt like it was broken on a fundamental level, so I wanted to complete it in a more honest way, rather than relying on the “pure catgirl uwu” image we got in Season 5. That to me justifies her actions, and I want to show a struggle for redemption on her part just as much as Shadow Weaver, especially since they’re supposed to parallel one another.

I went back in the afternoon and wrote another 927 words. Tried to squeeze out the last bit of Adderall from my system before I fell asleep again. These scenes dealt a lot with Micah’s psychosis and how it affected him post-Beast Island. I think that it was mild in S5, to the point where he might see a rat scurrying along the walls every so often when nothing’s there, but after Shadow Weaver died it got much worse. I never liked how the show refused to show any meaningful interactions between them, so Seraphite will have many of those.

Today I wrote a total of 2,299 words. My total currently is 5,555 words.

Day 3: November 3, 2021

Today was off to a slow start, but upon waking up (after a much better night of sleep), I wrote 979 words. Though I’m not exactly worried about meeting my WC goal each day - I usually end up writing twice or 3 times as much as what’s required, and even if I did miss it, I could fall back on that to survive with 50K+ - I’m finding that I have a very large succession of short scenes all at once. I’m not sure this is normal or good for the story, but if it doesn’t work, I suppose I can just change the beginning. I’ll have to do that anyway because the pacing is REALLY janky starting out.

I think in this story the biggest defining feature has to be directionlessness. So much of the world has changed since Prime’s defeat - heck, even the supercontinent was split into many smaller pieces, not to mention how much our characters have lost to the war. Micah in particular has had it especially rough. He’s lost his wife, his old teacher, and Glimmer is having a hard time reconnecting with this strange man she’s never met before. The only person he has is Nell, his doctor and companion.

Speaking of Nell, I realized some people are a bit confused about him. He’s my OC, obviously. He plays a major role in Starwalker so I won’t spoil too much for you all, but suffice it to say that he’s in love with Shadow Weaver and he’s also Micah’s best friend. There’s a lot more to his story, but you’ll have to RAFO once Starwalker is out. :P

I returned for two more “mini sessions” to write, because I was tired and panicked that Seraphite would end up badly written. I think that I’ve narrowed down the outline errors to the following: 1.) too many points of view, 2.) jumping into the action too early, 3.) just not enough scenes in general, and/or 4.) the time gap between Seraphite and Starwalker being so large that I probably need to write the memories first. Luckily these are things that can be easily solved with minimal reworking to the outline, so I think I’m going to keep writing.

Today I wrote a total of 3,229 words. My current total is 8,784 words.

Day 4: November 4, 2021

Today was the day to write a scene about the Velvet Glove! First session yielded 1,267 words. My writer’s block is much lower today because I know that the outline is fixable and I’ve been revising it as I go (if you guys don’t have Campfire you seriously need to get it - it’s a literal lifesaver when dealing with outlining and stuff).

As far as content goes, I’m very much enjoying the idea of Hordak’s clone rehab airship picking up survivors from the Velvet Glove (Tree). My friend and beta-reader @luna-tiel has already offered her OCs to me, and I’m planning to get more information on that before I keep writing. I figured it was the best way to repay her for all she’s done for me since reading Alura last year!

Bonus: have a snippet from Catra that’s an ode to the wonderful Entrapdak fandom.

Second writing session yielded 1,548 words, bringing my total word count to 11,599! I’m getting more confident in my ability to write this draft and do it well enough so I have a schematic for the rewrite.

I’m enjoying Catra a lot more than I thought I would. Her point of view skews a lot similar to my own in how I’ve characterized her, and her dialogue is very fun to write. I’m having her bounce off of Nell a bit (if you don’t know much about him, take a look at this fic, as well as this one too for a general idea of his characterization), and it’s SUPER AWESOME. They’ve got such interesting interactions!

Catra: Dad (derogatory).

Day 5: November 5, 2021

Woke up feeling fine (aside from swollen eyes because of a school-related meltdown yesterday 🥲), and I chugged 1,671 words this morning. My anxiety about the story has decreased heavily. The only thing I have to worry about now is the introduction and whether I need to subtract POVs, but that’s an issue for future Joye I suppose.

I’m really, REALLY thanking my writing software for existing and helping me so much. I will never get over how easy it is to revise the outline as I go if I sense more scenes need to be added next draft. That was by far the best thing about switching to a digital outline. Tip for all my NaNo buddies: if you win, you’ll get sales on writing software, classes, and more - and Campfire is one of the possible discounts! Depending on the amount of worldbuilding you do, the software can be $50-$75 USD, but it’s totally worth it!

If there’s one thing that I wanted to explore thoroughly in Seraphite, it’s the idea that returning to the past is sometimes impossible. All the character arcs demonstrate this to a degree. Realistically, I think that not everyone survived the unchipping process, especially Illuras since it was one of the first places Horde Prime destroyed and invaded. This scene does a lot for Adora in my mind because before, she’d held onto the reassurance that she was able to save everyone - and that helped her hold it together after Shadow Weaver’s suicide. But not everyone can be saved, and the only thing one can do is their best before they need to move forward, both for their own sake and that of others.

I didn’t end up writing more today because I had so much school to do, but I still wrote just above the word count goal and I’m sitting pretty at 13,270 words, so I think this day was still a success.

Day 6: November 6, 2021

I woke up and wrote 787 words, which is honestly way too low. I’m not sure why writing Adora’s point of view is so hard for me (if anyone is willing to let me bounce ideas off of them, please let me know), but it’s making all her scenes extremely short. I may need to seriously rework her chapters. Actually, that probably will absolutely need to happen. I need to reorganize the POVs way better for this rewrite because it feels like the story is way too thin.

I’m not going to be giving specifics due to spoilers, but I’m taking heavy evidence from the Steven Universe episode “Storm in the Room” for something major that happens in Part 3. I’ve been brainstorming this idea pretty much ever since I’ve decided to write Seraphite, and it’ll be wonderful to have it come to fruition.

Scarcely half an hour later, I went back to writing and did 1,807 words, bringing my total for the day to 2,594 and my overall total to 15,864. I’m thinking that I either need to add a lot more meat to Adora’s subplot or just have it so she’s aboard the Gossamer, and I’m not sure how much more I can develop this subplot exactly. Ah well. Notes for next time, I suppose.

Day 7: November 7, 2021

I woke up at 5 am and was able to pump out 1,125 words. I only have about 300 left to go, but given that I’m an overachiever, it’s probably going to be way more than that.

I’m finding as I write that Seraphite is much more a sequel to Season 5 of She-Ra than it is a sequel to Starwalker. I know that sounds weird, but it takes place after so much time that I feel explaining things would be fruitless. I can’t do much except recommend the show to others, but given that I prefer my writing to be accessible to everyone regardless, it’s a little disappointing. But I have to let the book be what it wants to be, so that’s that.

I went back about an hour later and wrote another 1,791 words, bringing my daily count to 2,916 words and my overall total to 18,780. I’m thinking that I might try a Stormlight-Archive style of POVs where I focus on different points of view depending on whose arc needs the most work. I think that may make the process of setting everything up more manageable.

Razz is so fun to write! People have asked me how I’m able to write her so well. My answer: I snort a big load of this guy before I go to write. Always.

Day 8: November 8, 2021

Well, I woke up at 3:30 am, because why not? Seriously though, this is one of the worst nights of sleep I’ve had in recent memory. I was able to get 1,297 words in on my first session, but most of what I wrote I wrote with my eyes closed. Why? Because I knew whatever I wrote would be garbage, so I decided I didn’t have to look at it. Plus, I would have just kept deleting everything I wrote over and over again.

Getting close to the end of Act 1! I’m definitely going to have to rework the plot on the next go, but just knowing that is actually relieving. Starwalker went through production hell because I didn’t alter the second draft enough from the first, and I really couldn’t take something like that happening again, given the stage of life I’m in right now as an overworked college student.

A few minutes after writing the first session, I fell back asleep till noon. After eating a tuna sandwich and taking my antidepressant way too late, I went to write again. Only 758 words, but at this point that’s exactly what I’m expecting from this crappy draft. Oh well. Total count is 20,835 words, which is pretty good for Part 1.

Tomorrow I finish Act 1! Woot woot!

Day 9: November 9, 2021

While I was talking to my best friend @kriff-the-jedi (who is doing her own NaNo megapost writing a Persona 5 fanfiction), I realized the problem with my outline. It’s the same issue as with Starwalker. The overarching problem is that the subplots feel very disjointed. One rule of thumb in writing is that every plot thread should be intimately connected with the others, and if it’s not, the story will feel “spread too thin”. I was confused at first why I couldn’t manage 6 POVs considering Starwalker 3.0 had 7 of them and I managed just fine, and that’s why. So, yay!

I finished Act 1, writing 759 words on my first session. From here on out I’m going to be avoiding posting snippets of my progress, considering the next draft will be very different on a fundamental level and I don’t want people to judge the fic too early. I’m sure everyone can understand.

During session 2, I wrote another 643 words, bringing my total to 22,237 words. Not the best, but at this point I’ve accepted I’ll need to rework the story’s outline on a fundamental level. I do plan to finish this draft before rewriting it just so I can have some sort of schematic to work with, but truth be told, I’m not exactly worried about the word count. I think I’m finally getting laid-back about my rough drafts.

Day 10: November 10, 2021

Well, I woke up at 4:15 am today because I was crying over math class yesterday and I can’t sleep when that happens apparently. I got 945 words on the page, and now that Adora’s subplot is starting to actually include relevant content, I’m having an easier time with it. Here’s hoping I don’t fall freakishly behind…

Speaking in terms of just general dynamics, I’ve had a very interesting time writing Nell. Nell’s past involves physical parental abuse, and though in the past he was fiancé to Shadow Weaver, the knowledge of what she did to Catra and Adora kind of broke him. He’s having a hard time forgiving her in this story, and considering the direction I want their dynamic to take later on, I have to be very careful not to invalidate his feelings for the sake of romance (which is what I felt like Season 5 did with Catradora).

Wow. Somehow when I went back to write, I managed to write 1,155 words, bringing my total for the day to 2,100 and my overall total to 24,337 words. I’m roughly halfway there! Here’s hoping I don’t have more tricky days where meeting the goal is a pain in the keister.

Day 11: November 11, 2021

Well, I woke up at 4:50 am after going to sleep at 8:30, so that’s still 8.5-ish hours of sleep. I can live with this. (I mean, I always do if it means NaNo.) On my first session, I wrote 1,234 words. It was a very good session and I’m glad I was able to actually write enough to feel like I’m getting somewhere in terms of progress.

I’m going to keep plot details vague to avoid spoilers, but when your story takes a direction you didn’t expect, it can feel so incredibly satisfying. I’m not even mad that I’ll have to rework my outline - I’m just happy that I have new ideas to play around with (and more words to write)! I’m taking a lot of inspiration from Sanderson’s Rhythm of War for this story, and I have no regrets.

I went back after crocheting and watching Carmen Sandiego, and got another 1,367 words down. This brings my word total for the day to 2,601 words and my overall total to 26,938 words. I deleted about half of Part 2 because of that direction the story took, but it’s no big deal. I’m going to be reworking the outline greatly anyway. I am getting close to the midpoint as a result of this change, though. That will signal a turning point in the book.

I think in this book one of the biggest themes is about forgiveness. This should be obvious for a redemption fic, but it shows that even the redeemed villain has to work on it, as well as her support group. It’s tricky, but I can work with it. This will be a good story in the end.

Day 12: November 12, 2021

Finally, I got a good night of sleep. This first session yielded 1,009 words, just above my preferred count for each writing sprint. I’m slowly making mental notes regarding what needs to be changed in the next draft, but knowing this one will be a pile of dog crap is pretty relieving.

I’m finding Catra’s character to be very easy and fun to write, which I wasn’t expecting given I loathed her arc in S5 and became a little bitter toward her because Shadow Weaver was sacrificed meaninglessly for the sake of a ship I didn’t even like. I’ve given her the hobbies of painting and singing in this story, and I think they suit her in a “goth-punk” way.

Went back after doing roughly 4 and a half hours of math, and I nailed another 1,267 words down, bringing my word total to 29,216 words. I had to make a sharp pivot regarding Nell’s character because the way I wrote him yesterday was so out-of-character I developed writer’s block just thinking about it. Luckily I was able to yeetus deletus the scene from the Seraphite Draft 1 canon, and now I’m doing much better. (No, I didn’t literally delete it. Never delete your work. Always keep a separate doc for cut scenes and all that.)

Day 13: November 13, 2021

I woke up at 6:10 am and wrote 1,132 words on my first session. I’m coming up on the first plot point of my story! Because Seraphite is a 4-act structured story, the midpoint actually occurs at the end of Part 3 (aka the middle of Act 3), instead of the middle of Act 2. I’m having a good time with this story, even if it’s going to be dog crap once I’m done.

I was talking to @kriff-the-jedi yesterday (who is my bestie and if you like Persona 5 she’s your girl). My basic trouble was that I knew this draft was going to be garbage, and the next one I’d have to reoutline completely from scratch. She seemed perplexed that I was doing NaNo if I thought this draft wouldn’t be a functional schematic, but we do have very different writing styles (I’m a discovery writer). Basically, I do think most of the ideas I have are redeemable, but I need to rework them in order for them to function better on the page and integrate with one another. I need to know what works and what doesn’t just on a fundamental level, and dog-crap drafts can still be useful in that regard.

I went back just before going to bed after doing some great work in math (if I do say so myself), and I wrote 1,793 words. That brings my total count to 32,141 words, and I am loving it! The midpoint is going to be nice even if I hate myself the whole way through this draft because I can finally start writing Nellura fluff. Whoever reads this story when it comes out is in for a real treat.

Day 14: November 14, 2021

I woke up at 5 am because I’ve resolved to finish two objectives of math today and I need to work on that. But not before NaNo! This session yielded 1,318 words, and I got past the midpoint. I’m having a decent amount of fun, but ignoring my writer’s instinct that something is Very Wrong with this draft is pretty difficult.

I’ve been working on this story for two weeks now! That’s pretty crazy. It doesn’t feel like that long, but it is! I’m 66.92% there to my goal, according to my NaNo dashboard.

This first session was a 3-scene one because my writer’s block got in the way today. I realized I had only 755 words written and realized I need to majorly up my game if I want to keep making good progress. I can do this! 👍🏻

I went back after checking on my Animal Crossing town and doing some crochet while watching Carmen Sandiego, as is my morning routine, and wrote 1,141 words. That brings my total word count up to 34,600 words, which is pretty great I’ll say. I’m trying my best to write at least 2,000 words a day, but it’s very hard some days because of how much I’m suffering with this outline. But I must soldier on.

Obligatory disclaimer about not giving too many plot details, but one important thing I had to research for this book was comas. One tender thing I learned was that talking kindly to the person and holding their hand/giving loving touches can sometimes be enough to pull them out of a coma. It’s got the potential for so much fluff in this story. ❤️ I may be struggling but I do enjoy the prospect of writing at least some of my disjointed ideas onto the page.

Day 15: November 15, 2021

Wrote 1,148 words on my first goal! So that’s something!

Well, I’ve reached the absolute. I’ve gotten to the stage where I’m writing random garbage that’s so repetitive it’s mind-numbing. I changed my mind - once I’m done with NaNo I’m going to be aborting this draft. There’s just too much wrong with it that I didn’t consider, so I’m just going to be puzzling that out till January when I go back to edit Starwalker again.

Day 16: November 16, 2021

I woke up at 7 am! Yay! Unfortunately, I have decided to abort this draft and start over. This does not mean I am stopping NaNoWriMo! The rules don’t say anything about working on multiple drafts, so I’m working on outlining the story right now. I can definitely still meet my goal if I miss a few days - I only have 15K words left and they’re going to be easy if I can figure out this stupid outline.

I have to be honest - the hardest part about Seraphite has to be the fact that I’ve been fantasizing about it for a LONG time. Normally this would mean I’d be able to write more passionately, but the problem is that my fantasies are very self-inserted. For example, I sanded down Micah and Shadow Weaver’s relationship a LOT because I personally would want comfort from loved ones after committing suicide and returning from the dead. The issue is that for them, it’s not that simple. I don’t want to turn into Noelle where I project my own desires onto characters for whom it just doesn’t work (that’s how we ended up with that dumpster fire of an arc for Shads to begin with). Thus, I’m going to be putting in conscious effort to write this story with a more nuanced lens.

Day 17: November 17, 2021

I had another good night of sleep! Let’s hope it lasts so I don’t keep falling behind in school. In other news, I’ve re-outlined Part 2 of Seraphite, and I feel a LOT better about this new draft so far. The path the story should take is a lot more clear to me, and I’m no longer feeling like I have to force myself to come up with something.

Assuming that I have the energy after going to lecture today, I plan to outline Part 3 as well. I could take 6 days off to outline and still be above my word count goal (thereby meaning I could still win), but since I’m an overachiever, I’m going to keep plugging away so I can get back to work ASAP.

Day 18: November 18, 2021

I managed to reoutline Seraphite in record time! I will update this post once I update my suffering word count.

Only wrote 864 words today but I already feel like this draft is an improvement. I’m just exhausted as heck and have no concentration abilities right now…

Day 19: November 19, 2021

I woke up at 5 am or so and wrote 1,207 words. I’m definitely still going to win - there are many perks to being such a chronic overachiever that you can win NaNo of all challenges after missing 2 days and straight up not meeting the goal for like, a week.

I’m feeling a lot better about this draft. There’s definitely stuff I still want to change, and I’m still slow-going, but I’m also suffering from intense school burnout so I’m not sure if my writer’s brain is already screaming at me that this draft sucks or if I’m just so tired that getting “in the zone” is hard. Time will tell, I suppose.

I went back in the late afternoon and wrote 1,630 words, bringing my word count up to 39,449 words. Yeah, I’m totally going to ace this contest despite my groove getting thrown off. It happens, but that’s the advantage of being an overachiever.

Day 20: November 20, 2021

After having an emotionally difficult night, I woke up at 7 am and wrote 1,121 words. I don’t really have much comment on this, except to once again shill for my writing software. With the worldbuilding panel I have, I can actually establish “systems”. Basically where you can organize characters, relationships, events, locations, arcs, and more into flowcharts and easily-accessible notes. How does this fit into Seraphite? Well, it makes organizing plot threads VERY easy and simple. I greatly enjoy working with Campfire Pro.

In this draft, I really wanted to rework the outline so Nell and Adora got more page time together. In the pilot draft, I think one of the most troubling things I observed was that I’d set up a relationship between them without actually letting them be in the same location for much of the book - not to mention that later on, Nell is very much focused on Shadow Weaver’s recovery, which already makes reconnecting with her abused daughter very tricky. Long story short, I think I’ve struck a good balance between the two relationships, although this will be the hardest story I’ve ever written by a country mile.

I went back and wrote 1,993 words, bringing my total up to 42,563 words. I’m 85.13% of the way to my goal! I feel very proud for recognizing the issues in my draft very early on and reoutlining in a way that establishes and does more with the established relationships in the story.

This is definitely the day for Dad!Nell scenes. I feel so good about this draft that I’m just going to blaze through it after NaNo so I can get it done. I’m not daring to hope that I can get away with this as the “working draft”, but if that did happen I would jump for joy.

Day 21: November 21, 2021

I woke up at 5 am and wrote 1,062 words, though I think the relatively low count is probably because of my exhaustion and annoyance from not letting myself sleep in. I don’t really have much more to say other than that.

1,278 words! Now my word count is at 44,903. Only about 5,000 words to go! I wrote a trash scene, but eh. Sometimes it happens.

Day 22: November 22, 2021

Despite it being the week of Thanksgiving, I still have to go to lecture. Hooray! At least I got 1,376 words down my first session. It’ll impede my ability to play Animal Crossing, but I’m so close to my goal I don’t mind anymore.

I’m finding that adding a little bit at a time to my finalized “timeline” as opposed to dumping it all in at once and dealing with disorganization later is hugely more helpful. I have it outlined scene by scene already, but finalizing a little at a time makes adding additional scenes loads easier.

I went back this evening and wrote another 1,065 words. This draft is like buttah! The plot is also picking up - I think one of the hardest things about beginning a story with six dynamic characters taking place 12 years after its predecessor is that you need a LOT of space to catch the reader up. And even catch yourself up.

Catra insulting Hordak when he doesn’t speak Meyan like she does is peak comedy. Change my mind.

Day 23: November 23, 2021

I woke up at 7:30 am because I was exhausted and anxious yesterday, and wrote 1,242 words. Due to being 97.17% done with my word count goal, I’m going to try and get to 50K today. Here’s hoping I can do it!

I’m getting close to finishing Part 1 of Draft 1.0. The pilot draft I’ve decided to call “0.1.” I think until I can figure out how to outline stuff better, I’ll have quite a few pilot drafts of future novels, especially considering I’m writing with completely original characters next year.

I wrote another 1,922 words today and updated my count! I have 50,508 words, meaning I have officially won NaNo and am eligible for the sales and prizes. But I’m not done updating this post! I said I would stop once the event was over. And as of now, it is not yet over.

I am enjoying Nell and Micah, though I am struggling with how they feel about Shadow Weaver. It is very complicated and not at all what I was expecting.

Day 24: November 24, 2021

I woke up at 5 am for lecture (because I don’t get a Thanksgiving break 😤) and wrote 1,135 words. It was a bit of a struggle to get over 1K, but I think that’s because these scenes I wrote are shorter by design. It’s nothing to do with the overall mentality or stamina I’ve got. Sometimes, there’s nothing left to say.

Went back after a lecture and wrote 1,595 words! I’m getting close to the end of Part 1, and that’s good news, because it means that hopefully I’ll be more engaged with my draft afterward. It is a slog to write, but not because of plot issues. Mainly just because there’s so much introduction that the action can’t really begin till Part 2. But don’t worry - it’s going to be good.

Day 25: November 25, 2021

Happy Thanksgiving everyone! I woke up at 6:30 and wrote 1,070 words. I also completed Part 1 of Seraphite, on the official first draft. I’m still feeling great about this version of the story, and I’m sure things will be better.

For this draft, I opted for a Metroman-Megamind reveal that Shadow Weaver was alive. Because I can.

After stuffing myself with turkey, I wrote another 1,360 words. Currently character interactions are feeling very stilted, but I may be able to fix that with an edit or two. I think Micah might be aware that Shadow Weaver is alive before he goes - that would give them time to cut right to the chase without all the “filler,” so to speak.

Part 2 has begun! I’m hoping for a better time on this draft, considering the pilot draft started becoming literal torture.

I’m up to 19,920 words on this draft (since that’s the relevant information right now). Still very low for one part, but I’m not too worried about exact word count anymore.

Day 26: November 26, 2021

I woke up at 7 am and wrote 1,023 words today. I’m sensing something is still extremely tricky with the way Micah, Nell, and Shadow Weaver are interacting. The point is that the reunion is supposed to be awkward, but right now I can’t tell if it’s awkward because I wrote it that way, or awkward because I myself am having a hard time pinning down exact emotions.

Today I learned via Google that the Roman numeral for 40 is XL. Random, but cool.

I didn’t end up doing a second session because I had to go to the ER for a concussion. Yay.

Day 27: November 27, 2021

I woke up at 8 am (very late for me) and wrote 1,056 words. I think I’m getting better at uncovering my characters’ secrets in terms of their emotions. I think I’m going to keep writing and discovering, and see if there’s anything I can do to make this process better.

At 8 pm, I finished writing 2,062 words. Things are getting very interesting now because I decided to give an important revelation earlier on. Gotta create that juicy conflict, after all! ❤️ My total word count on this draft is 24,063 words.

Day 28: November 28, 2021

I woke up at 5 am for church and wrote 1,079 words. The aftermath of the bomb I dropped on my characters (a bomb that went undropped until Act 3/4 in the pilot draft) is so intense and significant that I’m feeling evil. 😈

Wow! My story SERIOUSLY ran away from me this time. I decided that Catra was going to kind of flirt with the enemy in this story on the spot, and honestly? It’s unexpected, but I like the idea, so into the outline it goes! I’m very excited to see where the story goes with this spontaneous idea in there. But I will absolutely have to alter the outline to accommodate this.

I wrote another 1,753 words, bringing my draft word count up to 26,894. I’m pretty proud of having written half an official “novel” within only 10 days. Pretty impressive, if I do say so myself.

Day 29: November 29, 2021

I woke up at 5 am for lecture and wrote 1,264 words over 3 scenes. I’m getting close to the midpoint, and I think the way I’m writing Micah, Nell, and Shadow Weaver’s subplot is passable at least. I sense something is off, but I’m not overly worried about it since it’s a little minor.

[thisnoodlewritesao3]

Once Upon A Dream | Kyoutani Kentarou/Reader

Characters: Kyoutani Kentarou, Reader, Aoba Johsai Club Members

Pairing: Kyoutani Kentarou/Reader

Genre: Fluff, just happy fluffy times

Warnings: I don’t think there are any, but if you see any, tell me please!

Word Count: 2111

Summary: For almost 3 years, Kyoutani had seen glimpses of your life in his dreams. It was his favourite part of the day. So, when you move to Miyagi, he's far too excited to meet you. Only, he doesn't know your name or your what you look like. And what's a soulmate supposed to do when you go silent at school?

A/N: This has sort of been shoddily thrown together to help me get out of my weird funk lately, but I like it, so sue me. UwU. Check it out, I posted it on AO3 too (here)

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Kyoutani hated school. Not for any other reason than the fact that the people just annoyed him - much less the fact that he wasn’t particularly good at his - his grades could attest to that. Sure, he loved volleyball, and that might’ve been his favourite part of the day; except his favourite part was sleeping. That was because during the times of slumber, he could see glimpses of what happened during his soulmates day - what happened during your day.

He’d never admit to anyone how happy it made him. He’d do anything to learn everything about you.

At this point, he was sure he knew just about everything about you. Most nights you’d feign studying to your mom - you’d always end up watching far too many episodes of the latest anime that had you hooked - even so, you somehow had almost perfect grades. Every time you were in lessons, you took notes effortlessly, though he only ever saw those notes during class. When you weren’t watching anime, you were writing, listening to music far too loud; a thousand playlists that he could never wrap his head around - he was never sure how you’d managed to memorise where one song in each playlist was all because it took you too much effort just to like it. You couldn’t sing very well, that didn’t seem to stop you - he thought the same about your dancing - but something about seeing a section of that from your day always made him extra happy in the morning. You got along well with your mom, most of those clips you were laughing about something incomprehensible. You seemed to get along with a lot of people, though your closest friends were a pair of twins by the names of Anaka and Anoko. You lived in Tokyo, which hurt his heart far too much than he’d admit.

The one thing that irked him was your dislike for sports, you put in little effort to gym every time. Waking up after those clips of your day were his least favourite thing - he’d even put school before that.

Despite the fact he knew everything about you, or as much as he could, there were two things he didn’t know: your name or your face. He hated that so much. It was as if you never looked at your reflection, or took any pictures of yourself. He had a basic idea of what your hair looked like, but most of the time the strands were out of his vision.

From what he could tell, you were in the year below him; it wasn’t that that particularly mattered to him, it just meant he’d been seeing your life for a year longer than you’d been seeing his life. For the almost three years that he’d been able to see you, you’d barely had two years.

One night, a week before he’d be transitioning into his second year, he’d dreamt of you:

The world zipped by through the car window; you rested your elbow on the door hands, leaning your head into your open palm, forehead pressed against the glass. The view wasn’t one he was used to seeing, it looked more like the countryside rather than the cityscapes; a gentle wave of sadness mused inside of you.

“I know it’s going to be a lot to get used to-”

“You have no idea…” you cut off your mother, not even bothering to glance in her direction. Sadness was replaced with an eruption of aggression. You hid it, opting to clench your fist. Your jaw tightened so much that it ached.

“Isn’t this what you wanted?” Her voice was soft. You let out a soft sigh, nodding slowly. “I mean, you were so happy when you found out what high school he went to. Although, even the idea that you’re going to meet your soulmate won’t take away from the fact we’re leaving behind…” she paused, grip tightening on the steering wheel.

You finally tilted your head to look at her. Something swirled in the pit of your stomach and you reached out, placing a gentle hand on her shoulder.

There weren’t any more words needed between the two of you. It was easy.

Kyoutani woke up, running his hand through his short hair. That felt different than normal. He couldn’t explain it, not well, at least. And what had your mom said about meeting your soulmate? None of it made sense. Did you actually move to an entirely new place? Why?

It frustrated him more than it was worth.

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Weeks passed and nothing.

Kyoutani had hoped for something, anything. There hadn’t even been a single sight of you in person. He saw you in his dreams; in class, your stare would be focused out of the window intently; you were quiet, rarely interacting with your classmates. You looked at them with such an indifference.

He loved the days when he could see you at home; you did your usual song and dance, but this time you had a small puppy at home. You’d shower it with endless affection. You didn’t seem to watch as much anime before - he even saw you studying sometimes - but the joy in his heart when he listened to you lazily sing an opening was unfiltered and so pure.

He still had yet to see your face, to hear your name.

At the start of volleyball practise, Oikawa announced that the team would be getting a manager - as long as things went well with them, that is. Most of them were confused, Kyoutani included, until Iwaizumi explained that unlike the others, and there had been so many others, this girl wasn’t interested in Oikawa in the slightest - in fact, she didn’t even know who he was. Kindaichi confirmed this, since she talked to him about this.

Out of nowhere, a girl appeared at the door, she seemed frazzled. Completely in a daze. By that point, Kyoutani had zoned out, choosing to focus on literally anything else.

He missed the looks she gave him the entire practise.

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Sleep could not come sooner for him. He wondered what you were seeing right now, if you were even asleep; he wanted to know so badly what you thought of him, how you felt, he wanted to see your face. Just once. That was all, if he saw your face just once, he would be happy.

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Time passed and still nothing. He hated it. He hated how close you were to him, yet how out of reach. Things didn’t change much. You were still as quiet as ever in class; you were still as loud as ever at home. He memorized each word you spoke like it was gospel, because what if you just happened to talk near him one day? How else was he supposed to recognise you if it weren’t for your voice?

He didn’t learn much about the new manager. She was quiet, too quiet. She agreed to things too quickly and acted like she would break. Because of that, everyone treated her like she was going to.

He had caught her staring at him a few times, something that pissed him off because he didn’t want her, he wanted his soulmate. Wherever she was…

If he were being honest, he’d really tried his hardest to find her. No one in particular caught his eyes. He searched every first year classroom several times a week to make sure that he had never missed anyone on any particular day, the idea that you could be somewhere else other than right there hurt him. He looked at the desk where you normally sat. Every time he went it was empty. It sucked.

Oikawa only noticed his mood get more foul as time went on - even managing to hold off on commenting about it considering how he looked like he might actually kill someone.

One night, during his dream, it felt like all the pieces finally fell together.

You stared down at the ground- were you wearing sneakers? -rubbing your thumbs together nervously. There was light conversation in the background. He couldn’t make out a lot of what was being said. Not until you stepped towards a bench, grabbing a vibrant yellow water bottle. “Thanks, L/N!” Kindaichi’s voice chimed, puffing out his chest. He was dripping with sweat.

You gave him a half smile before your eyes wandered around. This sight had become a typical one for you, watching the volleyball club running around and practising. Your eyes land on someone in particular and your heart races, although it doesn’t last long, not until he turns and meets your eyes, glaring.

Maybe you just had your hopes too high; he clearly wasn’t interested in having a soulmate. You turned your head away quickly. Giving him a side glance. “Oh Kyou…” you muttered, turning away.

Kyoutani shot up awake. Never had his body been more alert in the morning. The volleyball manager hadn’t just been some girl, but it had been you? All this time you never said a word to him about it, and he had just glared at you like you were nothing.

It made him sick. The idea that he had been hurting you.

Never had he rushed to get dressed faster. Never had he been so excited to go to school. His uniform was haphazardly tossed onto his body, he almost forgot his bag. Everything felt heightened. The wind was hitting his face harder than normal - that might’ve been because he was sprinting - the ache in his legs was nothing compared to the excitement in his heart. The closer he got to the gym, the more nervous he became.

“You’re here early…” Yahaba snickered - normally Kyoutani would have threatened the brunette, but not today. His eyes were almost frantic as he changed into his gym clothes, darting around like there was something big he was waiting for. Because there was something big he was waiting for. That was you. For you to finally appear. So that he-

“Good morning, L/N!” Kindaichi cheered towards the door of the gym, waving frantically at you. You smiled and offered him a small wave before yawning, glancing towards Kyoutani. When you met his eyes, you seemed to pause mid-yawn, tears building up in your eyes.

He walked over to you. Not really knowing what he was going to say. Not really knowing what he wanted to say. Just knowing that he needed to be next to you. To talk to you. To hear your voice again, right now, right in front of him.

When he stopped in front of you, you almost seemed scared, sucking in a deep breath and leaning back slightly. You averted your eyes, not wanting to upset him in any way. He didn’t move, not an inch. His eyes danced over you, examining every part of your face that he hadn’t been taking the time to examine. This was his first time actually seeing you.

“Beautiful…” it slipped out before he could do anything to stop it. A warmth rushed to your cheeks as you smiled awkwardly, looking away from him.

“Um… thank you… Kyou…” The look on your face could only be described as elated, even as you avoided his eyes, you knew he meant it.

All of the other members looked at you confused, trying to understand what Kyoutani had said that had made you so flustered. That was quickly washed away when he grabbed your chin, lifted your head up and smashed his lips against yours.

Your eyes shot open wide, body frozen before you seemed to collapse. His arm caught you, holding you against him with such a need that it was destroying you. When he pulled away, the gym erupted into screams.

“Took you long enough.” You muttered, gently punching his chest.

“I… I never saw your face before-”

“You see it every day?” You tilted your head.

“No. I mean… t-this…”

“Oh…” He didn’t need to explain. You knew exactly what he meant, “I don’t really like my own reflection. So I just… avoid it?” An awkward laugh slipped out.

“But you’re beautiful.” He caressed your cheek, such a softness in his eyes that you didn’t know he was capable of.

“Can someone explain what just happened?” Kindaichi yelled, eyes darting between both of you as you shared such a tender moment.

“That’s what a pair of soulmates looks like,” Oikawa mused, wrapping his arm around the first year, “well, at least she’s cute. Sucks she has such a… strange soulmate.”

Kyoutani slipped away and pounced on the setter.

You simply laughed at them.

After all this time, you’d finally met him.

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