#specifically more schools outside my comfort zone

[girlscience]

trying to get to better as a person is so nauseating. was lonely yesterday so i messaged friends to try and plan hang outs. forced myself to ask about reference letters today even though i turned bright red and felt like crying. messaged friends tonight to ask if they could help keep me accountable so i don't feel like i'm doing everything alone. barf. i hate this. i want to hide in a hole

[drunkenkissesatdusk]

Can u maybe do like a Damian wayne x reader where they're friends and all but sometimes they (reader) tends to zone out a lot and think abt a lot of deep ish things that cause her to make weird faces without even realizing? Like she's much more quieter than usual and when he turns to look at her, he sees that she's visibly very upset but for seemingly no reason.

Oh, and if u want angst, maybe the specific thing she's thinking abt has something to do with him so she's really annoyed and snappy when he asks her what's wrong? Like she's be thinking abt how rude guys in their school are and then it kinda reminds her of Damian. Idk🙈🙉

(*ˊᗜˋ*)ᵗᑋᵃᐢᵏ ᵞᵒᵘ

am i good at angst? no… will i try? absolutely.

NOT YOUR FAULT.

pairings — damian wayne - al ghul x reader (platonic)

warnings — i tried to write angst but gave up, that’s all (and the ending sucks that’s not my fault (it is))

summary — pretty much what the request is gangsters

notes — i don’t know how to write angst 😞

━━━━━━━ YOU SHOULD’VE SEEN THE SIGNS before it was too late. you were sleeping more, food was suddenly too plain, you were easy to irritate, and you felt like you couldn’t do anything.

but, of course, you hadn’t understood when they began, you just blamed it on stress, since you had tons of tests coming up that you were relentlessly studying.

at some point, your grades had started slipping, and your teachers didn’t miss that. you were forgetting to turn in assignments, and whenever you suddenly couldn’t sleep the night before, you started falling asleep in class.

multiple teachers had brought it up after class with you, and you were able to come up with excuse after excuse.

eventually, Damian noticed. Damian, one of the only kids who didn’t ignore you this year, your first year of high school. but, obviously, that wasn’t always the case. Damian had originally been mean, tormenting you alongside all his other friends.

Damian only noticed because of your lack of emotions throughout the time you’d spend with him. on top of that, said time was clearly dwindling.

“hey, hey.” Damian called after you, catching up soon after and walking with you outside, far enough away from other kids so that the two of you could talk without anyone being nosy.

“what’s going on? you’ve been acting weird the past few days.” Damian’s face was clearly concerned, which irritated you further.

sure, you’d been quieter recently, and you almost always had a sour look on your face, but why would he bring it up?

“nothing, im fine.” you defensively crossed your arms over your chest — also doing so for a little bit of extra comfort as Damian seemed to be interrogating you.

“bullshit. talk to me, i’m your friend.” Damian stared at you, face full of worry.

“nothing.” you reiterated, “i said i’m fine, Damian. i’m fine.” you put emphasis on your words.

“you’re not a good liar.” he stated.

“like you even care.” you scoffed, turning on your heel and walking away. you found semblance in the school library, in the back of the room where you doubted anyone would go looking for you in.

with the silence of the room suddenly hitting you, your guard was up and your eyes were relentlessly looking around.

you probably looked angry. if anyone were to look at you, they’d probably think you were pissed off. were you? yeah, probably. why were you mad? you had no clue.

inhaling carefully, you felt your body begin to unwind, your heart rate slowly slowed.

guilt and regret flooded your system. you could then remember the way you’d treated Damian.

he was truthfully your only friend, he hadn’t deserved that.

i’m sorry, you sent the message. i didn’t mean to be so rude, you sent afterwards. he read the messages almost instantly.

it’s fine, not ur fault, he sent back.

sleepover at mine? you asked him, gathering yourself again before making your way to your next class. he agreed, and the day went on swimmingly.

the sleepover was practically the same, nothing bad happened, and it was easier to talk about it with him.

masterlist — reminder that asks / requests are open!!

[darkbluekies]

This is just me happy ranting, I'm in my feels don't mind me

I'm so happy that I created these characters and this blog, I really am.

I had been on wattpad for 4 years when I started this account and I could feel how things had started to change.my kpop fanfictions weren't doing as well as they once had and I felt limited in my writing. Although the stories and my imagination weren't that much different from what I'm writing now, writing these stuff (especially Silas's things) felt wrong to do since I was writing about real people so I didn't. I watered down my works so that I wouldn't feel bad, but eventually, those also felt too much. I officially left that account, and took down everything, a year ago.

So, in November 2022, I decided to create a new space, where I could start over. I wrote "intruder" and had it in my drafts for a few days, hesitating. I then published it but privated it because I was scared lol. I'm so happy I decided to make it public again.

I still remember creating Hedwig, specifically. I was out on my daily walk, it was dark outside and I was thinking of the characters I should use, a set amount. I had Silas, Kry and had in my plans to introduce Jerry as the last character. I was actually writing a character that was supposed to be the "quiet kid" in school, but i thought that using a girl in a school atmosphere would be more interesting. I wanted this "typical" yandere setting. I thought about different appearances for her, different characteristics. I had made Jerry 2 or 3 years earlier and thought "why not make someone completely opposite?" Hedwig wasn't meant to be rich from the beginning, just a normal girl. But I added it to have a bigger play field. I remember coming up with it and being like "fuck yes, write that down she's now rich".

I remember how Edmund came to life too. I was watching an old music video that I liked when I was a kid (Masquerade by Eric Saade), it was a Friday night and I was in bed. I got so inspired to write the Masquerade Massacre one-shot that I wrote it in one sitting. If you read the story, you'll notice that Edmund doesn't have a name in it. I hadn't chosen one and wasn't planning on making him one of the set characters, but it quickly became my most popular and liked one shot and people wanted continuations so I decided to make him the fifth and final character. His name was originally Edward, I had put that in his character masterlist and in the full masterlist, but changed it since one of my main characters in one of my private novels is called Edward ... and they're quite similar in both looks and behavior. I wanted something similar ... and decided upon Edmund.

I have gone out of my comfort zone on this account and I couldn't be happier, the people on here have been very supportive of me and my writing and it makes me so happy. I love you all a lot<333333

[poisonlove]

Miss Ortega|  j.o

jenna ortega x lector

Before entering the new school year, I never thought that changing my calculus teacher would change my life completely. Specifically, brown eyes and freckles left me with no choice but to surrender to them. Jenna Ortega, the new calculus teacher was going to come into the life of many students, who were only going to see her as one more teacher among many in the school. But unlike them, Professor Ortega was not only going to advise me for an academic contest, but also, to divert me from the path to what had once been my comfort zone.

“Did you hear that there will be a new Calculus teacher?" Enid said with a hint of happiness. A new school year began at Nevermore Academy, and all the students were excited about the news. Mr. Brown was an old grump who spent half of his time belittling boys and girls because they didn't understand his classes. Countless times I had argued with that idiot, suppressing the urge to gouge his eyes out every time he made Enid cry, calling her things like "stupid" and "I should have failed you." Despite that, he had never said anything offensive to me, perhaps because I was his only student who excelled in his class. Maybe it was that motivation that gave me the courage to confront him and defend my best friend. Half the time, I couldn't bear to argue with this old man, and as a result, I visited the principal's office quite often. I knew his office by heart. I closed my locker with a dull thud and smiled at Enid while holding my books. Ironically, we were going to have Calculus as our first class, and to make it even more dreadful, it was going to be two hours long. 

Two endless hours.

 I hope this new teacher is pleasant.

"Actually, yes, I'm glad that old grump is gone. I couldn't stand him anymore," I rolled my eyes with annoyance, starting to walk towards our destination. Enid walked faster, catching up to me, trying to catch her breath. "But you were his favorite!" Enid interlocked our arms, walking slower in the hallway. "Maybe, but that doesn't change the fact that he has been unbearable," I tilted my head, feeling somewhat uncertain about my words. Enid furrowed her brow, and her grip on my arm loosened as we entered our classroom. We took the last seats. "Hey T/N, have you seen Spencer? She's not responding to my messages," the blonde looked at her phone with a pout, typing something I couldn't identify. I shook my head slowly, turning on my phone. A notification made me smile at the coincidence. It was from Spencer.

S: Hey T/N, I'm staying home today. I'm feeling sick.

                                                             Me: Don't worry, see you later.

"Spencer isn't coming, she's sick," I turned off my phone, putting it in a corner of my desk. The blonde looked somewhat annoyed at me. "Well, she's MY friend, and she doesn't even take the time to let me know, but she does with you," she took out her pencil case and books, muttering words I couldn't catch. "What can I say? I'm amazing," I smiled at her, and she rolled her eyes in feigned annoyance. The bell rang, signaling the start of the school year, and all the students entered their respective classrooms. The murmurs and curiosity were palpable in this school; everyone wanted to find out who the new teacher was. I rested my head on my desk, scanning the hallway outside the window. The sound of heels approaching made me shiver, and unconsciously, I looked towards the classroom door. As the sound of heels drew nearer, my heart pounded rapidly against my ribcage from nervousness. "It seems like it's a female teacher," Enid whispered beside me, nervous and excited about the news. I looked at Enid with a trembling smile. The murmurs grew louder until they ceased completely. Confused, I looked towards the door, and my breath got stuck in my throat when I saw who was standing there. A woman, too young I must admit, looked curiously at her new class. She was wearing jeans, a simple white tank top, and black heels. Her right hand held a small backpack. A ghost of a smile played on her face as she amusedly observed the students' reactions.

She... she can't be a teacher...

She entered the classroom, walking slowly towards her desk. She sat on it, swinging her legs. She smiled as she looked at us, trying to be friendly. "Hello, everyone. I'm Jenna Ortega, your new Calculus teacher," she smiled at us with a hint of mischief in her eyes.

This has to be a joke.

[londonfog-chan]

Eddie Munson x Fem!Reader: Rite Here, Rite Now Part 1

This two shot fic is dedicated to that poor soul on TikTok getting shitty comments about a headcanon of Eddie liking Ghost. Fandom has become so damn toxic bro. Who cares about what an imaginary character likes or dislikes?? We are cringe, we are legion. We make out of pocket headcanons sometimes. Like come on, Eddie might “theoretically” dislike Mary On A Cross specifically for various reasons, but I could see him having some favorites. You can’t say he would entirely hate Ghost when fucking Year Zero and Mummy Dust exist. Or the whole of Prequelle as an album. I had to laugh at one person saying he liked Avenged Sevenfold (it didn’t exist in the 80’s and neither did Ghost like we are literally arguing about shit he wouldn’t have known about be so serious rn). But I digress. I’ve even gotten a couple hateful comments on a fun little TikTok I made and I honestly have just been deleting them and blocking. Don’t even want to deal with people’s bullshit anymore. Please enjoy this spite fic and continue writing and having fun babes. Go against the flow and make Eddie proud.

Part 1 (You are Here), Part 2

***

Every member of Corroded Coffin could tell when you arrived to a function. Eddie knew the sound of your car like a cat that knows when its owner is home, and he’d be waiting outside the school to greet you first. That and the car make and model. Someone always called it if not Eddie. He’d been off his game today though, definitely the excited nerves. Jeff called out your 1979 Volkswagen Beetle heading up the driveway by slugging Eddie hard on the bicep, Gareth and Dougie immediately following up with calling “no tag backs” as they rushed to hit each other and Eddie like a bunch of middle schoolers. Eddie almost got nailed by Dougie’s beefy fist until he nimbly dodged out of the way, cradling his prized Warlock like it was a newborn.

“God dammit, easy asshole!” Eddie laughed. “Don’t be hitting my baby! I need her intact if I’m going to impress our songstress.”

“Trust me Ed, she doesn’t need more impressing. You had her in a tizzy when you asked her to write a song for you. I wonder what she came up with.” Gareth said, leaning forward so his hands were settled on both his high and medium toms, he was watching your approach intently with a gleam in his eye. “She didn’t even make it to campaign on Friday. Must have really been in the zone.”

You parked the car against the side of the driveway, emerging looking as though you’d just swallowed a whole mouthful of cry baby sour gum. Your lips were pressed tightly together, clutching your fat Trapper Keeper to your chest as you approached the group.

“Hey sweetheart!” Eddie called, waving you over enthusiastically. “You okay?”

“Eddie… God it’s so bad… It’s worse than I thought.” You said, grimacing.

God you looked delicious. He couldn’t help himself but to stare and smile like a dope. With each step your flowing gray skirt swished enticingly side to side, and with a bit of pride Eddie noticed you were wearing the Twisted Sister shirt he’d distressed for you, looking like an adorable snack of a metalhead with your black clothes, black opaque tights and dirty Chucks.

Eddie’s smile faltered only slightly when he heard your self depreciation.

“Oh come on, can’t be that bad. Not with those grades you’ve got in English. Let me see…”

“Fuck no! No seriously… it’s worse than you think.” You insisted, shaking your head and pulling away from his outstretched hand, “It’s so… God dammit! What the hell was I thinking…?”

Gareth, Jeff and Dougie left their instruments to approach you, Eddie putting both hands on your shoulders to comfort you.

“Hey, hey… come on, don’t be like that.” He said, smile gone and a more serious look on his face. “I get it, I really do. It comes with the territory of writing your own songs. Trust me, I’ve done it for years. You won’t pick it up overnight, and whatever you think is weak we can work on it together. I’m a DM honey, I can have my pen out faster than you can blink and help redraft as many times as it takes.”

“Oh… god dammit… okay, fine…”

You reluctantly handed Eddie the trapper keeper, the velcro making a harsh rip as he pulled it open to the first page where your lyrics neatly sat waiting for him to peruse. Eddie’s eyebrow raised when he saw the title, “Square Hammer”, outlined in red ink.

“ ‘Square Hammer’? … Huh… I like it, that’s good.” Eddie nodded, and continued to read on.

The lyrics were certainly unique to say the least. It was obvious you’d tried to go with a theme based on the prompt he’d given you: something that oozes the brooding dark metal he envisioned Corroded Coffin would croon to thousands of fans. You certainly had an affinity for the macabre, and he knew he could trust you with everything he wanted in his vision. Then again you could have written the cheesiest, poppy trash in the world and he would have loved it. He was extremely biased, far too sweet on you for his own good. But these weren’t bad at all. The lyrics reminded him of old Hollywood vampire movies, echoing the work of Doctor Faustus with the thematic element in the song. The voice of the lyrics seemed to be coming from an otherworldly entity, one summoned to offer power and prestige to the listener.

And Eddie was obsessed with every word the further he read on.

“Woah, woah…”

His eyes widened with every sentence he read.

“Holy shit…”

Powers clandestine, solving a crooked rhyme… Every line, no matter how simple, packed a lot when combined in the collective.

Eddie finally looked up at you, completely bewildered.

“You wrote this by yourself?!” He croaked.

You were embarrassed to hell, curling in on yourself and looking like you wanted to die.

“Ye… yeah… I… When you asked me to write for you, I got really stuck on what I wanted to do. But I remember you mentioned Black Sabbath was one of your first covers, and then I couldn’t get the image of the coffin out of my head because, you know, “Corroded Coffin”… and then we were reading Faustus in Mrs. O’Donnell’s class and I thought since you asked me to do you this favor and Faustus is all about favors…-“

You were rambling. Not even paying attention to Eddie’s continually growing grin. He was bouncing on the balls of his feet the longer you ranted on, until his untamable outburst silenced you.

“THIS IS AMAZING!” Eddie was screaming, scaring the shit out of everyone. “Holy fuck sweetheart! Are you bullshitting me?! This is… fuck! We’ve been stressing for new material for next month’s gig at The Hideout and you just gave it to us on a silver platter?! Jesus H.!”

“Bwha-?!”

“Check this out…!” Eddie turned away to show his friends while you quietly protested, unable to speak as he passed the paper around. The guys crowded around, each one shouting out when they saw a favorite part, “hammering the nails into the sacred coffin” quickly became a favorite, because they immediately began trying to work out how they could fit the lyrics to sound.

“All we gotta do is work out a melody and we’re in business baby!” Eddie said. “This is bitchin’!”

“But it doesn’t even make any sense!” You argued. “Like seriously? The entrance to the shrine part does not fucking fit, I only wrote it because I couldn’t come up with a better rhyme with clandestine!”

“Who cares?” Eddie cried. “It’s badass as hell! The imagery is absolutely savage… ‘Hiding from the night, sacrificing nothing’, and don’t let me forget about the little tongue in cheek line you added about hammering nails into a sacred coffin!”

“It’s fucking great!” Echoed Jeff.

“You should be proud. You managed to take our style and give it a unique spin, that’s not something anyone can do.” Eddie praised. “God dammit… I’d have been a millionaire by now if I could write like this.”

“You… you really liked those parts?” You asked cautiously.

“Of course I did sweetheart! This is real metal shit right here. And the part with the ‘crooked rhyme’? That really captured the creep factor I was looking for. Shit… what’s more metal than summoning a demon for a deal? That’s exactly what Corroded Coffin needs in its material. I love this little brain of yours!”

“Don’t forget Ed!” Dougie cut in. “ ‘Are you ready to swear right here right now before the devil’?!”

“Bitchin’! Keep this up, and I’m gonna wanna make you write all of Corroded Coffin’s songs from now on!” Eddie beamed happily.

“We gotta get the melody worked out!” Jeff said, “Any ideas? I could come up with a few…”

The boys began gabbing together, Eddie unable to help himself as he began to strum his precious 1984 BC Warlock, his black beauty. Without a doubt he could already envision how he could make his baby purr for you, impress you, take you out finally.

And then you changed his world forever.

“… I had an idea for a melody already…” you said quietly.

All eyes turned to you. The guys were thunderstruck.

“Seriously?! Lyrics and a melody?! You’re spoiling the shit out of me sweetheart! Jeff, let her borrow your…-“

“No… no I… I don’t know how to play guitar…” you said, cutting off Eddie sheepishly, “But I… I brought my Casio with me…”

“Where is it?!”

“In the trunk of my bug…”

“Well go get it! Show me whatcha got sweetheart!”

Eddie followed you to the front of the Volkswagen. Everyone always thought the front trunk was the coolest shit ever and he was no exception. The cool car only added to the many things he liked about you. You took out the obnoxiously large keyboard and the stand, fumbling to close the trunk until Eddie stepped in with an “easy… I got it”, slamming the trunk shut and helping you lift the Casio like a gentleman. You were shaking, vibrating with embarrassment so hard that Eddie had to help you plug everything in and adjust the sound, hovering and reaching over you on purpose hoping you’d notice and feel his burn for you.

“Alright sweetheart? Show us what you’ve got.”

You turned on the Casio and fingered the keys gently, warming up with a few chords as you tried to soothe the shaking in your fingers. Fiddling with the settings, you stalled as long as you could while the boys waited patiently. Once you found the setting you wanted, you went for it.

It was like a demon had possessed your body. The melody was quick, but it packed a hell of a punch. It was in the key of D minor, and you had ironically chosen what sounded like a combination of 1960’s psychedelic sticky rhodes and Transylvanian organ to achieve the effect you wanted. The sound overall was eerie, yet enchantingly fun all at the same time. And your singing! You were singing softly under your breath, rocking yourself to the melody on the tips of your worn out sneakers, and you had quite the set of pipes! Despite your shot nerves, you’d clearly come up with something truly special that no one else in the entire world could have conceived of.

It wasn’t the traditional metal Eddie had in mind, more avant-garde, theatrical even. Whereas he had expected a sound more like Black Sabbath, you played something not out of place at a theater performance of Dracula. But this sound… there was something that nagged him about it. It was a sound that Eddie could imagine playing to arenas of screaming, adoring fans.

“Gentlemen… that’s our fucking song!” Eddie cried, “That’s our song, it’s a goddamned masterpiece!”

The Casio halted, and your mouth was hanging open mid play.

“What?! How-…” you began.

“I can already hear the riff, Ed what do you think of following with standard tuning instead of going to D minor?” Jeff picked up his Gibson and began to play, mimicking what he heard on your Casio by ear. “If you move it, the sound is way off from what I’m envisioning. But if you keep it at standard you leave it easier on the fingers with the couple of open notes when you start stretching.”

“Yeah, yeah! If you tune it down it’s going to sound off with her playing when you hit the chords.” Eddie agreed, immediately looking back at you. “Play it one more time sweetheart?”

You cautiously complied, going through the melody one more time as Jeff began to follow with you. Eddie was completely absorbed in your music, listening to both you and Jeff play and following along quietly. The warlock in his hands eventually couldn’t be helped, humming to life when he started playing a chord at a time by ear. As he played, he kept you repeating the melody over and over, both Eddie and Jeff deep in concentration on the sound. It was getting almost exhausting trying to continually repeat the sound until they got it right.

“D minor.” Eddie said, playing a note.

“Then she does B flat there.” Jeff played.

“A minor.” They said in unison.

“C. And that’s what I’m thinking your rhythm guitar can do, meanwhile, I’ll keep the root of the chords for the riff so I can follow her keys.” Eddie said, and he began to perfectly copy your melody. “Okay sweetheart, just one more time… and then let’s bring everything together.”

[camaro-and-smokes]

Get Out of My Dreams, Get into My Car

Chapter 7: You Got It

Notes: Moodboard by the lovely @a-redharlequin 💜

Summary: Billy had already given Steve an hour-long lecture about the basics, taught Steve to wax his board, and assured that they wouldn’t even have to catch waves today. Unless Steve specifically wanted. Steve didn’t. But he might still try it though if it got Billy's attention.

Read on AO3 >>

:::::::::::::::

On the next morning, Steve was waiting for Billy in their living room wearing his new wetsuit.

“You can swim, can you?” Billy asked Steve with a smirk, pulling the zipper of his own wetsuit closed as he passed Steve on his way to his board.

“I was the captain of the swimming team in high school and a lifeguard at the community pool for two summers. I can swim,” Steve huffed mock-offended, holding his board up. Though, yes, while he was a strong swimmer, The Pacific ocean was a whole another beast than Lake Michigan where he’d spend his childhood summers.

“Just checking,” Billy chuckled, and patted Steve on the shoulder. “C’mon, let’s get started,” he continued and walked out into the sunshine from their living room.

The day was glorious; warm breeze ensured the heat of the sun wasn’t too much and kept the waves small. People were gathered on the beach, seagulls were screeching in the distance.

It wasn’t even midday yet, but Steve had decided not to risk it with his pale skin and had covered every area that wasn’t protected by the wetsuit as much sunscreen as he could. His nose was white with the excess, but better to be careful than sorry.

Billy had already given Steve an hour-long lecture about the basics, taught Steve to wax his board, and assured that they wouldn’t even have to catch waves today. Unless Steve specifically wanted.

Steve didn’t.

He’d tried to keep a brave face throughout, but the closer they got to getting into the water, the more nervous he became. When they were practicing the pop-up on the beach, he couldn’t keep it in anymore. He sat down on the board and looked at Billy, who was on his own board displaying the right position. “Listen, Billy…”

“Yeah?”

“I don’t think…this is for me.”

“How so?” Billy asked, sounding genuinely curious.

“All this…safety and technique and…”

Steve hadn’t expected Billy’s smile to be so gentle. “You have practiced new skills before, haven’t you?”

“Yeah…”

“So, you know you gotta do the thing in order to master it. Right?”

Steve chewed his cheek.

“Hey. You said you wanted to try this. This was your idea. But we don’t have to do this. I’m not forcing you to do anything.”

Steve had half hoped Billy would’ve at least sounded annoyed. But of course he didn’t. He was a professional instructor, no matter what. “Yeah, I know.”

Billy sat down on his own board and wrapped his arms loosely around his knees. “I was happy when I saw you in all that gear when I came home the other day. It felt like…” He shook his head and smiled. “It felt like you wanted to try something new and fun, something I liked and…I got really excited. Everyone here knows how to surf and how amazing it is. It felt great you wanted to learn, too.” He paused, looking at the sand, and then looked back up at Steve. “And I thought it would be great to have a hobby we could do together.”

Steve instantly felt like shit. He knew why he was being such a chicken. He was already so far outside his comfort zone, trying this, and, in addition, finally having Billy’s undivided attention. It was all exactly what he’d wanted. Maybe he hadn’t realized how easy it would get it and now he was like a fish out of water. Suddenly, he hoped that he’d have the chance to call Robin and ask her for assurance that he was doing the right thing.

“We’re this far already,” Billy pleaded. “Why not go a bit further and get into the water? Just try staying on the board and paddle a little? No need to even try the pop-up.”

Steve couldn’t help smiling. “You sound like you’ve taught kids at some point.”

“I have. Still do.”

Steve realized that this was something he, even after two months of living with Billy, had no idea of. “Really?”

Billy nodded with a wide smile. “Yeah. Every Saturday morning.”

Steve’s stomach dropped. “You…turned down kids to teach me instead?”

“No, they were gone before you got up. They come in at sunrise, we ride some waves, I give them pointers, and then they’re gone around nine. And it’s not a paying gig. They’re kids from foster care. Argyle’s shop did a fundraiser that got these kids here. He provides the gear, and I donated my time in order to get them into it.”

The way Billy’s face lit up when he spoke about the kids made something fuzzy swell in Steve’s chest. “You’ve actually managed to get them to come here at that hour?”

“The time wasn’t my idea. The kids want to come here the moment they wake up. And since I live here on the beach, it’s not a problem. I salute the foster parents who make it happen.”

Steve bit his lip and nodded. This was a whole new aspect to Billy, and he liked it. A lot. “Okay. Let’s do this.”

The smile that spread across Billy’s face alone was worth a try, at least.

Billy was glad the mention of the kids got Steve to at least give the real deal a try. He led them into thigh-high water with Steve’s board. “Okay, we’ll just try paddling. Nothing more.”

“Yeah, okay,” Steve replied, sitting onto the board that Billy held in place, and laid down.

The waves were small, but big enough to go over the board and directly on his face. He tried paddling, but the waves kept pushing back, and he lost his balance from the first wave that hit him, making him fall into the water. He tried again, with the same result. “How do you stay on this thing?”

“I told you, you gotta start paddling at once if you don’t want to get overthrown by these baby-waves,” Billy said and came to help again. “Go on, try again. I’ll keep you steady so that you get the idea.”

Steve laid down on the board once again, facing the open ocean and the waves that were coming at him lazily.

Billy took a deep breath, knowing he would have to touch Steve, but this time without an excuse, and grabbed the board from both sides, his other arm over Steve’s legs. “Okay, now start paddling,” he said as he gently pushed the board through the first wave, then the second while Steve paddled with his both hands and propelled the board forward. When they got through the first three waves, Billy let go. “Now you got it!”

The board glided through the small waves, up and down, through one and down again. Steve couldn’t help smiling. This was amazing, and he wasn’t yet even actually surfing. He turned his head to shout to Billy how great this was, but that, of course, distracted him. A slightly bigger wave made him lose his balance, plunging him into the turquoise. He was rolling in the water and took a gulp of the saltwater, of course inhaling it. Panicking, he got disoriented for a while until a firm hand caught his arm and pulled him above the surface. He started coughing immediately.

“Hey, you’re okay,” Billy said and rubbed Steve’s back. “You’re on the surface.”

“Mayb—maybe we’re…” Steve started, but he had to halt to cough more water from his lungs. “…done for today,” he finally wheezed.

“Yeah, I agree,” Billy replied with a smile, giving Steve’s shoulder a gentle squeeze and taking the board, leading them back to the beach.

Steve sat down on the side of the wooden terrace of the bungalow to take a proper breath and have his heartbeat slow down a little.

Billy pushed Steve’s board to stand in the sand. Before sitting next to Steve, he opened his wetsuit, pushing the top part of it to hang on his hips.

Steve made a point of not looking.

“Hey, that can happen to anyone,” Billy said, pushing his hair back from his face with his hand. “I’ve taken a dive like that more times than I can count.”

“I have sand everywhere,” Steve muttered.

Billy let out a soft laugh. “Yeah, probably.”

“You ever thought you might drown when surfing?”

“Not drowning, no, not really. Though worried about being bitten by a shark once, yes.”

“Oh god,” Steve moaned and buried his face in his hands. “I’d forgotten those.”

“Hey,” Billy said, patting Steve’s shoulder. “That was one time. One, and I’ve surfed my whole life—apart those few years in Hawkins. It’s not as frequent as it’s made to be. More of bad luck. If you get bitten, that is.”

“I don’t know if I can try again.”

“Maybe now is not the best moment to decide that. You being shocked and all.”

Steve glanced at Billy, who was looking back at with a kind smile. “I bet you’re great with the kids.”

Billy’s smile widened. “You should come a watch sometime. The kids are amazing.”

Steve smiled a little. “Maybe I will.”

“Wanna get rid of all the sand?”

“Preferably.”

“You gotta take off the suit out here on the terrace and let it dry. Then you can just shake it all out. If you bring it in wet, there’s sand everywhere inside too. I prefer keeping the sand here on the beach.”

“Sure, I’ll do that. Would you bring me a towel?”

“Yeah.”

When Billy went back out with the towel and a bottle of water for the both of them, Steve had removed the top of the wetsuit and was looking at the surfers that were riding waves further on the beach.

Billy swallowed. He didn’t remember Steve having that much chest hair in high-school. He didn’t care for that much hair on his men, but on Steve…He was willing to make an exception.

“I’m proud that you tried,” he said to Steve as he gave him the towel.

Steve took it, now smiling a little. “Yeah. Well, I had to,” he said as he wrapped the towel around his waist and stepped out of the wetsuit. “You kept pestering me about it. I really had no choice.”

“Me? Pestering? Never,” Billy said with a smirk, mock-offended.

Steve was smiling, too, and Billy knew there was something happening between them, even if he wasn’t entirely sure what. Steve had bought everything he’d need for surfing, just like that, and asking nothing from him. No tips, what kind of board to get…Honestly, it would’ve made more sense for Steve to ask him to borrow a suit and a board from him for the first few tries rather than just buy his own out of the blue. But Steve had surprised him with this whole thing, suddenly wanting to try and having all the gear…So, either he had really gotten the idea of try surfing stuck to Steve’s mind or…Billy didn’t want to let himself go there, but he knew he already had; Steve wanted to try something Billy loved to get to know him better.

Billy looked as Steve downed the entire water bottle in one swig. Steve fit on the beach. The wind blew his hair all over, but he didn’t seem to mind. He was tall and fit, and sure, maybe he was a little pale, but that would be fixed if he wanted to get on the board again. And besides, the moles he was dotted with, they stood out better like this. Billy found himself thinking he wanted to touch them, to examine them one by one, trail them with his finger, find all the constellations hidden in them.

He felt hope in his heart for the first time, even though he knew it was dangerous. From all his previous experience, he’d learned that hope was a recipe for a disaster. But Steve, he surely wouldn’t do that to him? Break his heart?

When Steve finished his water, he glanced at Billy and caught him staring. Billy’s soft gaze made something warm bloomed in his chest. “What?” he asked, smiling.

Billy smiled back. “Nothing. Just thought you fit on the beach.”

“I do?”

Billy nodded, folding his arms over his chest. “Maybe you’re a bit too pale to fit in properly, but we can fix that.”

“I’m still not sure if I want to get back on the board.”

“That’s okay. You can stay on land and watch. Work on your tan instead.”

Steve laughed. “Sure.”

They looked at the other surfers for a moment again. Steve felt that he’d accomplished something even if the try had ended in a disaster. Though, he also felt stupid, even though he knew no one could handle something like this on the first try. But he’d fallen off, rolled in sand, and inhaled salt water right in front of Billy, which made it extra humiliating. He hadn’t wanted to mess up that badly.

“Don’t worry about the fall,” Billy said, as if he’d heard Steve’s thoughts. “You tried, and that is enough as itself.”

Yeah, Steve was proud about that, of trying. And that Billy acknowledged it. He’d done what he set out to do; to get Billy’s attention. This was a good start.

“Hey, go ahead and take a shower. I can take one after you. Won’t hog all the hot water from you,” Billy said, winking, and took Steve’s wetsuit and hung it to the hook next to the terrace door.

“Well, that’s a first,” Steve said with a short laugh as he walked inside.

[literary-illuminati]

2024 Book Review #10 – The Last Graduate by Naomi Novik

I read A Deadly Education last year and quite enjoyed it (and Novik’s unrelated Spinning Silver is just one of my favourite low fantasy books full stop so she has quite a bit of my trust), so I finally got around to putting in a hold request for the sequel. Broadening your horizons and reading outside your comfort zone means swimming through 400 pages of YA a couple times a year, right? Anyway, despite only barely remembering who anyone but El and Orion were when I went into this, was a fun read!

The book picks up more or less directly where A Deadly Education stops – with the horrible murderous monster-infested extradimensional wizard high school’s cleansing machinery repaired for the first time in generations, and the place therefor incredibly less monster-infested than previously. El, prophesied future dark lady of the apocalypse with a savant’s talent for specifically the sort of magic you cast after cackling and before someone puts a sword in you, doesn’t get to enjoy that much – her senior year seems destined to be spent being the target of just about every monster that’s left. Eventually you really have to wonder if the school is trying to kill you – and that question is where the plot really starts to go off.

So I said it before, but this is very much YA. I don’t mean that as an insult, or even a marker of quality, just that it’s a book from the perspective of a 17 year old looking down the end of high school and clearly written to provide a relatable emotional reality for an assumed audience of the same. So El sometimes acts like a cartoon character, and is pathologically incapable of expressing her emotions coherently or expressing affection for the guy she likes in any sane manner, and is far more blase about murder attempts and soul-eating monsters than emotionally awkward conversations – but honestly all that just rings as pretty true to life. Deeply aggravating at times, and her internal monologue and all its snark and doublethink does occasionally grate a bit, but overall it really works. She’s just a fun character to spend time in the head of, (and far less irritating in basically every way than she was in the last book. So hey, maturity!).

The emotional beats were all pretty simple and clearly telegraphed, and it isn’t exactly a book that requires you to sit down and ponder deep symbolism or metaphor to comprehend, but the pacing is tight and it’s very readable. The prose isn’t really anything to write home about – especially knowing what Novik can do when she decides to get fancy and show off a bit – but it very clear and just dripping with El’s personality on every page. I read this at the same time as I was picking through an incredibly dense and citation-heavy historical reader, and the contrast made me very appreciative of those virtues.

Character-wise – well, there’s El, and Orion (love interest, single-minded and near divinely-ordained monster hunter, golden boy of the most powerful enclave in the world), and there’s El’s few close friends, and then there’s a cast of dozens of students with maybe one memorable character trait who kind of drift in and out of the narrative as required. The amount of nuance and exploration someone gets drops off dramatically with each step down the list you go. Most of the cast shows up precisely when required and is more or less forgotten about directly afterwards – which does sell this being a school with over a thousand students in it! But the number of characters who really feel real drops off pretty rapidly.

(Also like, I assume it just comes down to social progress in the 2010s coming at you fast, but you really get the sense that at some point between the books getting written the publishers sent down a memo that you were allowed to say queer people existed now.)

Even more than Deadly Education, this is a book without any sort of singular villain, or even really any consistent antagonists. Some of the other students are assholes, sure, but the book’s whole thesis is that no one is that murderous or awful for the sake of it – they are because they’re rats in a cage, convinced that amoral self-interest and husbanding and acquiring every resource they can is the only hope they have of maybe living to see their families again. Offered a chance to do good, to actually change things for the better and help everyone without getting themselves killed in the process, just about everyone takes it. Even the semi-intelligent school itself gets in on it by the end, pressing the senior class to figure something out and make it obsolete – and the whole conflict of the final act is how and whether everyone will.

El and Orion can both kill basically arbitrarily large numbers of monsters (or people), so the monster-killing is never really where the book finds its drama either. I mean, both do a lot of it through the climax, but the actual tension mostly comes down to crowd management and logistics and whether everyone else is as committed to this as the two of them are.

As for what they’re struggling against – so like, this isn’t Divergent, by the standards of the YA I read in high school, the social commentary is both subtle and nuanced. But I mean, it’s also a story where highschool is four years or murder-hell-prison and justified only because it’s barely the lesser of two evils, and also a story where the poor and marginalized are only kept around more-or-less explicitly as ablative bodies for the kids the powers that be care about, with their only hope of good life being so impressive and useful to those kids that they try to bring them along when they ascend back up to the gilded paradise that is their birthright. So like, not that subtle.

As far as teenage romances go (which, for me, really isn’t very fair at all), El and Orion’s was surprisingly tolerable. It helps that they’re both actually deeply profoundly weird about it, and also that the book didn’t try to milk any drama out of will-they/won’t-they stuff or a love triangle. The ‘and they have sex for the first time the night before the final climactic struggle where one or both of them could very well die’ did feel right out of an old bioware game, though. (Also I’m just a sucker for tragedy and ironic mirroring/repetition, so the ending was great for me).

Look forward to finishing the series whenever I get around to it sometime in the fall.

[trash-gobby]

✨🦇 Trash Gobby Intro 2.0 🦇✨

AO3: severenvansickle

Ways of Supporting me

Ko-Fi Link!!!

Redbubble: DreamScapeSev7n

Hello! I am trash_gobby, also known as trash. I kinda disappeared for a really long time from this tumblr account, only really showing up in small spurts to post or reblog stuff.

I've been dealing with a LOT of personal stuff that has made it really hard for me to keep up with this blog in general. Not for lack of desire. What's been going on in my personal life isn't really something I want to share here or anywhere regardless of my anonymity. Needless to say it's been rough and now things have really started to improve for me. I've even gotten published in an indie published anthology which was a real special thing for me.

Now I've been focusing a lot on my original works of fiction and improving things personally. I still want to post here. However, I won't be taking requests anymore and will be reformatting my content around posting only fanfics or headcanons which I will come up with. There are some stuff which people have requested in the past which I may consider working on if the mood strikes me.

A lot has changed for me in the past two years so I want to focus more on content which personally interests me right now.

There will most likely be a follow up post which goes into more detail about formatting and how things are gonna be organized once I've actually found time to devise a proper system for my old works. It might take a while though, considering I'm working full time now, and also doing a lot of important life stuff outside this blog.

Rules

1. I will DON’T encourage anyone who interacts with NSFW content who is underage.

2. Be respectful!!! No hate speech allowed (this includes anything transphobic, homophobic, transphobic, racist, fatphobic, antisemitic, ableist, Islamophobic etc.)

3. Constructive criticism is ALWAYS WELCOME!! This is a place where I want people to feel welcome to give respectful critiques of my work as I’m always trying to improve.

4. I won't be writing things from specific fandoms I've grown a certain sourness towards (usually because of the person who is in charge and not the fandom itself). I.e. Harry Potter is a bit of a sore spot for me and I have no interest in writing for it (I don't have an issue with others doing so since it's not up to me what others write and I think everyone is entitled to their own opinion and feelings about a fandom or work).

5. Relating to rule 2. - please don't bring any anti-palestinian sentiments to this space (this is not an invitation for others to be anti-Semitic so don't get things twisted. I support Judaism and the right for Jewish people to exist in peace and security within ALL countries and to be able to self determine. I think the same rights should also be extended to the Palestinian people who have been ignored by many and have had their rights and humanity stripped from them). This is not the blog of a Zionist and I would encourage others to follow or unfollow accordingly. Free Palestine 🇵🇸

✨ What I Write!!: Fluff, Headcanons, platonic/friendships, NSFW, Dating/SFW, LGBTQ+, tragedy/angst, crossover, reader x insert, character x character, mini-fics, character preferences

✨ What I WON’T write: p*dophelia, r*pe/non-con, tortue p*rn, BDSM that’s to outside of my comfort zone, b*astiality, incest, raceplay

Fun Facts About Me

1. I crochet lots of things for fun

2. I am a gender gremlin

3. My favourite all time characters are Severen (Near Dark 1987), Bishop (Aliens 1986), David (TLB 1987)

4. I am a huge A24 movie studio fan, because I am a pretentious film school graduate (I'm not a fan of Christopher Nolan or Quentin Tarantino though. Which I guess means I'm not as pretentious as I thought?? 🤔)

5. I have an AO3 account which has more stuff on it then this blog.

6. I am an aspiring author with a short story already published in a small indie press anthology (won't name here because my irl name is in the anthology). Little Ghost Books is the publisher though, and I would encourage y'all to check them out if you like 2SLGBTQIA+ horror often published indie and major horror titles. They are very worth it 💖

Masterlist for works

[twistedwonderlandobsession]

Hi! I was really interested in this post and I thought that I’d try it! 

My ingame name is Flick, she/they, I’m b-day twins with Leona, and I’m 15 going on 16 soon! (So no staff matches, please!)

I’m an introvert, and I’m on the spectrum. Probably ADHD or OCD? I’m still on the waiting list for a psych evaluation. I tend to overshare and get defensive easily.

I can’t stand clutter. If I’m in a messy environment I can’t function. I’m only productive if I need to do something I’m interested in. My lifestyle is based on my mood, so it fluctuates a lot. I consider myself to have pretty intense mood swings.

I like sunshine, grape juice, graphic novels, writing, drawing and cats. I dislike bugs, clutter, my siblings, hot weather and alarm clocks.

I’m homeschooled b/c my experience in public school wasn’t good. I hyperfixate on things. The current object of my obsession is Twisted Wonderland.

When in a good environment, I perform very well academically. I enjoy being physical (like in P.E.), but haven’t recently.

My life is kind of in a slump right now. My mental health is high, and I’ve been working on improving myself, but I haven’t gotten anywhere with social or physical health.

I’m hoping to change that soon and get out of my comfort zone. I want to have friends and be able to not get flustered or freak out around people. That’s a big goal of mine.

I think I’m a little like Rook, but I only focus on the beauty in art. Not people or architecture, just art. I feel happiest when I find a graphic novel that boasts the art style I admire.

Okay, sorry if that was too long! Thank you so much for looking at this, I look forward to seeing who I’ll match with! (Please do platonic and romantic!)

I match you with Kalim Al-Asim

(platonic)

The First Impression:

As soon as Kalim accidently made eye contact with you one time in the hall he was immediately attached to your side. Determined to be your friend.

The Relationship:

No matter how much you "overshare" kalim was right next to you eagerly listening to each word like a podcast....he may not remember all of it but he tries! No matter how defensive you become this clueless ball of sunshine was never taking any of it personally and always tried to make you more comfortable with him. Honestly it's hard to tell if he is extremely patient with your mood swings or just dosen't notice them.

Any intrests of yours are always fascinating to him, and as soon as you mention any Hobbie Jamil is physically holding him back from spending hundreds of thousands on supplies so he can join your fun. Though after Jamil is done wrestling him feel free to talk his ear off about your current hyperfixation. He is eagerly listening while nodding.

Being homeschooled and a bit deprived of social interaction was something both of you had experienced when younger and while kalim may refuse to feel negativity about this experience burying his emotions deep deep down it dose give him something to relate to you about.

Knowing that you love sunshine he always would try to get you to hang out at a park or eat outside with him, but would always avoid Scarabia or any hot and humid places prioritizing your comfort above all else.

As soon as he head you mention once in passing that you wanted to get out a bit more and make more friends this boy was all over it, dragging you around and introducing you to everyone he knew, constantly encouraging you to step out out your comfort zone.

He means well just put your hand on his shoulder and tell him to slow down a little.

I match you with Jade Leech

(Romantic)

The First Impression:

Jade was intrigued by you, or rather more specifically your tendencies. Granted, that they were nothing too outlandish but nonetheless the variety of emotions, reactions, tendencies and appearance mixed together at times could be quit the contradiction and always made his eyes linger on you whenever near

Why He Fell:

Honestly no one knows why Jade fell, perhaps not even Jade himself. Granted even if the Leech twin did happen to know it was very unlikely that he would tell you. Though over time it became clear how he would subtly glance around the room, or how he would casually inch twords you, even getting to the point where he would randomly muse to himself about whatever had your focus raising his voice ever so slightly louder than usual or interject in your conversations. Soon this turned into light touches such as picking a leaf off your uniform or brushing your hair out of your face, which became bolder casually grabbing your arm or shoulder to steer you eventually morphing into him putting a arm around your shoulders or resting his chin atop your head.

The Relationship:

When you did begin dating the closer you got the more that it was clear that Jade was in no way the more reasonable twin, he just happened to be more composed and less upfront than Floyd was. This was made clear the more time you spent with him being just as chaotic as his brother, having a tendency to hang around whatever he had deemed amusing.

Being that he has a rather moody brother himself the male delt with your mood swings quite well, even if they were particularly bad at times he always managed to take whatever you threw at him with an amused smile already being adjusted to have to live with a rather unpredictable and moody person since birth.

He was eerily good at picking up on your mood, interests, and current hyperfixations. Always knowing just where the line was and making sure to never cross it. Despite his surprisingly teasing nature at times that to some may come off as intimidating and everything in-between your relationship was built off of a mutual respect for one another's boundaries and care for eachothers needs.

It was good for him that he noticed how much you loved the sun and enjoyed being active, using this information to his advantage he began taking you on hikes with him. After a while of this happening he happening to note you tended to have more energy the day after and seemed to be more positive and productive causing him to make these hikes a annual thing making sure you have them at least once a week if not more.

As soon as you accepted Jade Leech as your partner that was it, there was not getting rid of him. There was no way he was letting you go over trivial fights and such like most relationships downfall. As far as he was concerned he was just waiting for the time to pass till he could legally make you his life partner. Though despite this he never stopped working on maintaining your relationship and keeping clear communication about the important things so that one day he will be able to get a ring on that finger. Though until then he'll just enjoy the ride.

[strawbubbysugar]

Ok, so I have another set of questions about the world, particularly about the Cultural differences between Porphyal and Atomata.

1. What is the traditional look/outfits of each kingdom? Do they have specific colors? Accessories? Textile decorations?

2. What is the architecture like? What does it look like? What materials are used?

3. Is there any traditional music for each kingdom? (Lol I just pictured techno being played in Atomata for all occasions, I apologize for my immaturity)

4. What is the main language that is spoken in each kingdom? Do they have other dialects?

5. I imagine they have spies during the war that get intel for the kingdoms, but do they have any citizens that are genuinely invested in the other culture? Like, citizens that would love to go visit and write books about what they learned? Obviously they can’t because war, but maybe they have libraries with information?

6. What traditional festivities do they have that the other culture may find confusing or maybe be blown away by it if relations were better?

7. What urban legends do they have? Or traditional cautionary tales? Stories children or young bots are told during bedtime/charge time?

8. What are the schools like or rather how does each culture handle education?

9. What would you say is one of the coolest thing about each culture you really like?

10. Is there a tradition Sun, Moon, Pry/ncess dislike/love about their culture?

I hope these aren’t too many questions… 😅

Never too many questions! 1. In general, I lean towards whatever looks coolest/most interesting, but its really just fantasy medieval clothing. However I will say that Atomatan clothing leans far more colourful with big shapes and styles, while Porphyal leans more into subtle textures and practicality

2. For porphyal, classic medieval architecture! For Atomata, classic medieval architecture with a TWIST that it all looks like sets for a childrens tv show! I have a pinterest board here with some examples! Atomata: https://www.pinterest.ca/strawbubbysugar/atomata/ Porphyal: https://www.pinterest.ca/strawbubbysugar/porphyal/

3. Porphyal enjoys a classic lute, while Atomatan instruments mimic human ones, but sound like chiptunes/8bit music! Like this!

4. its just "common", like dnd, so as not to single it out as being english for people who read in other languages :) There are def dialects, for animatronics their dialects mimic humans but they also have varying levels of echo/static to their voices. Older models tend to have far more echo

5. Of course! Both sides have citizens that are just normal people, and want to see the war end!

6. Animatronics know all about the human world's holidays/festivities, but they all are shifted ever so slightly. Humans know little to nothing about animatronic festivities, thanks to the level of information control in porphyal

7. Humans have an urban legend of "The Mangle", an animatronic that steals people from their beds and twists their bodies into something unrecognizable. Animatronics have an urban legend about a purple man, but it differs so widely from person to person, there isnt a consensus on how the story goes

8. Simple schooling for humans, small villages usually have one person that teaches children in the same class regardless of age, simple stuff like reading & writing, maybe a small bit of math, and some history. Animatronics have basic knowledge downloaded into them at birth, and if they want more knowledge they need to seek it out themselves

9. Ooo good question! I love that human beings are practically built to create, and any human can make art if given the tools and time to do so. I love that animatronics use kindness and compassion as a staple of daily life, with being anything else an outlier

10. Sun loves animatronic kindness and willingness to share, but he hates how hard it is for them to step outside their comfort zone. Moon loves the ease of access to knowledge, but hates that kindness is expected when it is not earned. Pry/ncess has a hard time feeling any particular way about anything in porphyal. Theyre a little bottled up about those feelings.

[einsatzzz]

grinding and cooking so hard 🫡🫡🫡 i was so productive today, i can't believe sdfnsjkdfbds i managed to finalize some parts of my chapter timeline (specifically the 1st school term) + got into character deep dives. i will def complete at least ch1 this month!!! 💪💪✨ also here's a chibi tsuna from my drafts, he's so cute 🥰🥰🥰 he's abt to suffer

setting up the draft is so fun! tho my fave part of the art process is coloring hahaha so advanced apologies for what would be a not-so-clean lineart for this because i need to rush to my wife who needs me so badly asap - coloring. even when i'm just setting up the draft, im already itching to color, but if i color these super messy sketches, it's gonna look so ass!

anyway, let's if i can finish this within 1.5 weeks 🤔🤔🤔 because if i can, then i can def complete until ch2 this nov too...? or that i can release new chapters more often? only two things that can fuck me over now are backgrounds and complex perspectives dsjbhjdbhd there will def be things outside my usual art comfort zone, but i'll just try to keep it not too far away outside hahaha

my only bad news wrt chapter order is that, sorry kana enjoyers sjhfhgsdfgsdf patience is the key...bc im a kana enjoyer too...i'll just draw a bit more art of her outside of the webcomic 🥹😂🥹😂🥹😂

we're following the manga here, so it'll be slice of life fun for a while! (<-this user also needs to train their art skills for when we go into actual battle shonen mode...i mean there will still be action in between but that's 🥴🥴🥴)

[hey-hamlet]

Hello hi!! I kinda miss your au talk, so is it okay to ask for more? I really want to know more about your newest villain's quarter au, but if there's a specific au you'd like to talk about I'd love to read it <33

It's always ok to ask for more! I've been missing a bit bc my body had stopped feeling hunger for like a month and it's really hard to eat - coupled with uni starting again I'm just exhausted haha! But! I have still had AUs on the brain so lemme yell ab them.

Aizawa goes to the villain's quarter pretty regularly - its not a good idea to arrest someone within one because you'll get put on every shit list ever and also, in the moment, pumped full of lead. Daylight heroes don't enter for a few reasons - they'll get shot at, every villain in the area will actively try to hunt them down and also the HPSC doesn't pay heroes for incidents resolved within dead zones. It's a legal limbo tbh. However, a few underground heroes tend to frequent each one - there is always someone willing to sell out a competitor, or someone who talks too much in the clubs and casinos people from outside pretend they don't visit.

Hes confused to learn the fancy bar has started opening during the day and even move confused when he finds out its now selling food. It doesn't have a set menu - there is a meal each day, one option with meat and one without, a bowl of rice and a small soup. If you can pay, it's 700 yen. If you can't, its free. The catch is the people running the bar are very well connected and know if you can pay - if you run without paying, you get banned.

Given that its the only restaurant in the villain's quarter - the only place many people feel they can go for food without getting harassed or arrested, its very popular. Aizawa would, at a later date, say he'd gone to get some information - but, at the time, he was honestly just curious. And hungry. The shogayaki was sweet with an intense almost caramelised ginger flavour, the salad was light, the egg drop soup was light with fine ribbons of egg and the rice was soft and fluffy with little packet of furikake and seaweed if he wanted it. It was really good - not gourmet, but warm and homey. Intensely comforting.

Not something you'd expect to find in a bar deep inside the Mutsutafu Dead Zone.

The sight of a young teen humming to himself in the kitchen as he neatly shreds more cabbage is concerning, but its Sunday afternoon - he might be helping out a family member, or, worse but not terrible - young enough that this was the only place that would employ him. He was too thin, but not to a medically concerning degree, right on the line between naturally thin and just plain hungry. When he comes in about a week later, 10am on a Wednesday when any kid should be in school and the kid is still there, tasting a pot of admittedly amazing smelling curry, he gets Very Worried. He keeps coming, wanting desperately to be able to help but not knowing where to start, other than just looking out where he can, talking to the kid, letting him know someone cares.

Tomura wants to kill him, Kurogiri swears he feels familiar, AFO is suddenly hit but a very awkward reminder that Shirakumo was not a random fun dead body he picked up but had friends who mourned him and then proceeded to cope in unhealthy ways by becoming underground heroes who didn't sleep.

Izuku had to go shriek in the walk in fridge when he realised he'd been chatting to Eraserhead the whole time.

[deadbeandrop]

is lumpus a city boy

y'know i really love asking in that way (there's something cute yet almost mocking about the phrase) but you get me, see, i already have a list of this stuff i've been trying to figure out for everyone

for the record, at the same time i've also been trying to nail down the other factors that come with a family situation there, like, work statuses of the household, wealth, what time frame i'm working from (it's such a nightmare trying to get a job and own a house in comparison rn...) so i'll talk about that a bit too... and there is also the ever present "do you guys know how fucking Expensive it actually is to stay at a summer camp this long???" thing that unfortunately my very specific brain has me thinking about even though it doesn't matter in Cartoon Land and i simply have a Prablem

(i'm also still learning about some of these terms i use because i have no life experience but i hope this still paints a picture here even if it might not be fully correct...?)

so for lumpus specifically we're looking at

- two parents who aren't particularly young when he's born (my friends not too much older than me talk about their 50+ parents and i'm like What???)

- a span of years where it's still easier to make enough money to own a house and be alright on one good source of income (his father works but i'm not sure what his job is yet... maybe he should go work at the nuclear power plant all homer simpson-style and die ☺️ idk)

- a flashback that i'm working off of where things look pretty average over there (i do still have the idea that the house is a hand-me-down from one of their parents on the table though... in general my brain still tilts to working class in a different era but this is subject to change a bit)

- me having already placed a general area in the state that i've been playing in (i've been eyeing sort of the southwest here but i do need to think about it more and the distance from camp further north)

- at least enough money to be sent to camp for the summer (even if he has to scrounge it up over the year, but i've also been thinking of camp kidney already being a bit different/weird on this front)

- and a character where camp being something of an "escape" for him is actually pretty important

so i don't think he's a country boy, but i also definitely haven't been imagining things directly in the city, so i placed him in the middle zone, which means they're either somewhere in suburbs or a little bit outside of that... not overwhelmingly urban but still not too far. i'm only learning today what i might be thinking is usually called the exurbs, maybe...? i don't have a strong sense of reference for a lot of things so a lot of my thinking is based in places where i've lived... and he very likely may not have a super accessible woods to go and frolic in but maybe the issue is just that he has no one to do it with cus he's an only child with no friends growing up LOL

the Main part of the Escape aspect is still on other factors, i.e. he's lonely at home, his parents fight a lot and his dad's an alcoholic and he has a very complicated relationship with them (you know how it goes), he's not the best in school and gets picked on and in trouble a lot there as well, etc.

and i think it's almost helpful to describe everything in contrast to slinkman's family, which in comparison is a bit easier to pin down. his family is more on the side of upper middle class (?) and they have a good sized house with passive income (father's a landlord) to be comfortable with and are actively involved in their community. they do live in the suburbs just because a mix of the of the type of people they are (his father's a city boy but his mother's on the country end) and cus they do have the privilege to do so. they're able to pay for slinkman to go to college/uni and for lumpus to fuck around over there but for slinkman to still feel like he's leeching off of their support too much... and it's almost that feeling to me when i visit an older relative who's got an actual House, and it's a decent size, its always clean, and there's a spare bedroom or two, and they're always busy or off doing something, and it still feels like they have the money to spare on whatever even if they don't really... to me that's still almost the feeling lumpus gets when he stays with slinkman and his parents for a while LOL

so the difference between their situations at least in translation to today is something like this to me:

To me middle class is staying afloat - you make enough money, can save up for a minor goal like a vacation or even a medium goal like a car down payment but you’d probably finance the car rather than purchase it in cash. A minor emergency or car issue won’t break you but it’ll delay other priorities (like vacation would get delayed by a year)

Upper middle class is making enough to support your day to day life and having a decent amount of excess income to where you can save quite a bit while taking a family vacation a couple of times a year (maybe overseas for a couple of weeks a year). You may be working towards saving for a rental property and investing in a 401k, IRA, and maybe even taxable brokerage account. Rainy day fund is fully funded so you won’t have an issue with regular maintenance on your car or needing braces for the kids.

lumpus' family still struggles at times, is probably in debt in some areas, they don't always have the money for what they want and something like camp becomes an exception (there is definitely still the threat of lumpus worrying he won't be able to go to camp if too much comes up...) and slinkman's family is over here with assets and money to spare even if they can't go crazy... but everything also sort of feeds into slinkman's "it's easier to just follow someone else's lead" thing too, like, his dad is like ''son why don't you go to college for (XYZ)'' and slinkman's like ''ok'' because he literally had his only sense of self aspiration crushed barely a couple of years ago and he has no idea what to do with himself and they'll have the money to do so and so he just sort of goes along with it

anyway. yeah. i have a lot of shit locked and loaded at any given time thank you for the quastion 😁

[br1ghtestlight]

my angsty bob's burgers au that's like a character study for bob and louise (specifically how they enable each other's worst traits as linda pointed out) <3

when louise is three years old, gene is five and tina is seven linda goes to pick up gene and tina from school and gets into a car accident where all three of them are killed. bob was working at the restaurant and louise was w/ him

obviously they both take it pretty hard, since bob lost two of his kids and louise lost her mom and her siblings :( bob tries to keep it together for louise & continues running the restaurant and taking care of her while struggling with grief. he doesn't want to be like his dad and emotionally shut out louise or avoid all discussion of her dead family so he really TRIES to be there for her and vunerable and talk about her siblings and mom but it's hard and louise was already not a very social kid. they end up being pretty isolated from their community and mostly keep to themselves without having any friends or family to rely on. outcast type vibes </3 very similar to norman bates and his mom in bates motel (but less incest and murder-y). but louise is DEFINITELY a daddy's girl and has a very strong connection to him (and fear of losing him)

linda's family (and especially gayle) are obviously devastated without her and don't really talk to louise or bob anymore bcuz they're just a living reminder of what they lost. gayle didn't get along super well with louise to begin with

big bob tries to be there to support bob and louise bcuz he's been where they are, but it's hard on him too, losing two of his grandkids after he already lost his wife. and without linda there to repair their relationship and keep things friendly they eventually fall out of touch w/ each other

bob doesn't really talk to people or socialize outside of the bare minimum with his customers, and louise doesn't have her older siblings to push her outside her comfort zone or anybody to look up to and emulate other than bob so she becomes a social outcast herself & the kids at her school are scared of her and think she's weird and creepy (she def leans into the personality of s1 and s2 louise a little more with the voodoo/horror type stuff. she's got serial killer vibes tbh)

louise is creepy and generally keeps to herself but she's also just mean and pushy and rude to other people. she becomes a bit of a bully esp to the weirder kids like andy and ollie without her siblings around to morally guide her and remind her to be kind. bob definitely tries his hardest but parenting and grief is Hard especially with being a single parent and there's only so much he can do..... there's a little bit of disconnect between them. so when teachers from school call bob and tell him that louise is being kinda pushy and rude to kids on the playground he's just like "well she's louise. thats how she is" and doesn't challenge her as much as he probably should esp w/ the grief and trauma in her life, he feels like he has to go easy on her and let her get away with things she otherwise wouldn't have

teddy still eats regularly at bob's burgers of course but he doesn't exactly. make conversation with bob and without linda around he doesn't feel welcomed as a friend, he's more of just a regular customer who comes around a few times a week for a burger. definitely not bob's best friend

louise was so young when linda, gene and tina died that she doesn't remember them at all by the time she's her canon age in the show. she knows she HAD siblings and she's seen pictures of them but she can't remember what they sounded like or their personalities, sometimes it freaks her out and she imagines what they would say to her if they were still around. it's just hard for her :( and especially without her relationship with linda to show her the complexity of womanhood i think she has some more internalized misogyny. a lot of mental health issues and trips to mr frond's office (which she HATES)

because linda died after louise was already in preschool she did sew louise's ears for her before she died and they're her last keepsake from her mom, so of course she wears them all the time and has an even stronger emotional attachment to them. bob's pretty good at sewing and knitting so he fixes them up for her whenever they're torn

louise got tina's bedroom (previously their shared bedroom) all to herself after they died while bob stayed in his and linda's old bedroom. gene's bedroom becomes like a weird office/storage space that they dont really use for anything they just keep some of tina and gene's old things in there like his keyboard etc. louise's closet bedroom remains a closet lmao but louise does end up with a pretty cool bedroom when she's older

louise would eventually become friends with rudy in this au because he's like the first person to show her the kindness and empathy that her siblings would have if they'd been alive, and he's not scared of her. this au would mostly be about their developing relationship and louise trying to become a more social and less.... aggresive person??

bob could probably learn something from her too. it's so hard to lose your family and losing children is the hardest thing ever but you can't stay in that grief for the rest of your life. especially when you DO have a surviving child to take care of and love as hard as that might be sometimes (he's not neglecting her or anything but neither of them really..... moved on emotionally after the accident. bob probably doesn't drive bcuz he's scared of hurting her, and he's definitely overprotective of louise because he doesnt want to lose the only person in the world he's still alive for)

probably not gonna do anything serious with this au but it's something I do think about from time to time. also on a lighter note these messages w/ @goldendoodlerlockerlove

[timevir]

2024 - A New Timevir

This post contains some words about the loss of death.

Writing is a very fun hobby that I've done for as long as I can remember. It probably started as written exercises and fanfiction during childhood. It transformed into intricate worldbuilding as I was introduced to the hobby of tabletop roleplaying. In recent years, I've written interactive fiction, scripts, novels and sourcebooks.

But one constant caveat is that I almost never shared my work. It was an enjoyable process to convert thoughts and feelings into substantative manifestations in the physical realm. Yet despite many coworkers, friends and family members asking about them, I'd always give the same answer of "it's personal and not worth sharing".

I thought about why I was doing this, and noticed I have been living the life of an observer. I enjoy the detail of the world around me, and paying attention to things that others would consider irrelevant. I would even deliberately put myself out of my comfort zone if it meant putting myself in a location that I could see something new. If there was an interesting protest in the city I was living in, if there was a strange, dangerous event occurring in the vicinity or if there was an unusual experience or location to be discovered, I'd happily waltz in and act like that I was meant to be there. During the riskier parts of youth, it even meant a bit of trespassing, but I stopped doing that after a few dangerous close calls.

What I was not doing as an observer was manifesting that in the world. Many of my projects would be built, some even to completion, and then they'd sit in a box, frozen and inaccessible through their obscurity. Nothing I made ever felt like it was deserved observation compared to the rich tapestry of the world around me. Even in the rare moments I found pride in something, it would soon feel obsolete compared to some next logical alternative.

A lot of my life has been spent on "the grind". Work had seemingly crept its way into absorbing the free energy I had in an addictive loop. At first, it was merely a way of ensuring survival and trying to get out of school debt. It took the majority of my late 20s to get out of school debt, a feat I was able to just reach before my 30th birthday. A few more months, and I had a decent emergency fund and a "real" disposable income, assuming I wasn't going to try and buy a house (which to be honest, isn't an exciting proposition at the moment. Real estate trends caused by high demand have made housing costs extortionate, but that's a discussion for another time).

Work is of course necessary for human survival. Indeed, if we took a snapshot of lives lead across history, nearly everyone has had to contribute in some way to their communities for them to function well. The meaning of work has shifted through the various periods of history significantly, but its goals have remained the same. What is implictly understood, even if not necessarily well recorded, is that there was a whole tapestry of living that existed outside of these actions that could mean vastly more to the people that lived around them. While much of these ideas have persisted through the passing of cultural works, very rarely have we got a good snapshot of the life of any specific individual, even if they potentially had amazing tales to tell.

Identity has slipped through my fingers somewhat accidentally. It had felt much easier to sacrifice every bit of effort to accumulate knowledge, resources and a position of comfort than it took to stand for anything. At first I may have resisted the ideas of exaggerating an accomplishment, or cutting on the quality of a product to create it faster, but those values became too easy to discard when reward was on the table. But if anyone were to ask me about the morals of the situation from the outside, I'd remark a half-mealed "it depends" which really meant nothing beyond the acknowledgement strong values had merit and self-interest could get in the way.

It seemed like the intelligent thing to do because the things that were remembered across time were great accomplishments, long standing monuments and the best and worst of events moulding humanity's timeline. It was easy to mistake what was memorialized for what was important in life. It then followed that if memorialization was an ultimate goal, that the best way to do so was to accomplish some great feat was to set yourself up with as much power as could be wielded, a good proxy for which was money, before putting all that strength into ventures in the hope that something would hit and a legend would be born.

It is possible I could have remained trapped in that vicious craving for objectives if it wasn't for a life shattering event at the end of 2023. It was at this time that my younger brother died unexpectedly in his mid twenties. A whole life was potentially ahead of him, but it was cut short at almost no notice. My relatively normal family crumbled into chaos and it was shattered.

In the emotional fallout, I looked again at what I had done. Of course I did not regret unburdening myself from debt, or succeeding at a career. But in all the push for an abstract notion of success and legend, I had lost an invaluable voice that could never be replicated. My brother had lived his life to his fullest in his time on Earth. He had moved country, he had found love and friendship, and he had ideas of a future. Seeing these wither into tears, memories, and finally a grave, made me realise in the end that a memorial would not make up for the moments that would never be had again.

My new year's resolution for 2024 is to try to reestablish a voice. To truly live in the world and not merely plan a story for my death. To make sure that my friendships and bonds remain strong and not let them disappear due to the inconvenience of maintenance. To stand for something and not just exist in the pursuit of convenience.

One way I am going to test myself on this goal is to try to make sure I write something down each week. Something public. It won't necessarily be something profound, but at least it may prevent me from slipping back into forgetting about the things that really matter. Perhaps it is better to exist in the world than merely drift through it.

[kiwiana-writes]

for the ask meme: 5, 17, and 29!

5. What’s the fic you’re most proud of?

It's gotta be the actor AU. The longest fic I've ever written, by far the most personal fic I've ever written, and it got the most phenomenal response—in terms of stats, sure, but far more importantly for me, the way people felt seen and like... taken care of? by it.

17. A trope you’ll never, ever write for.

Never is a STRONG word, god knows I've definitely said 'nope not for me' and later written stuff lmao, but I cannot envisage writing a high school AU ever again. I barely survived high school, and it's too far behind me now for me to want to relive the experience 🤣

29. Have you ever gone outside of your comfort zone for a fic? How did it turn out?

Oh, so often. The arranged marriage AU was way out of my comfort zone in terms of the need for world building which is not something i feel confident in like at all, but a bunch of people commented that specifically which was so lovely.

[35 Questions for Fanfiction Writers!]