#spartan women were badass.

[v0ideddr3ams]

I saw a tiktok post saying that it was "practically foreplay"

Penelope was a spartan woman.

That being said,

She's watching the slaughter of the suitors and is like

"DAMN that's hot."

[empresskadia]

I haven't met Naomi-010 yet, but I have no doubt from what I'm seeing, I'm going to love her. I can't wait to start reading Glasslands, I love that we get to see other Spartans. On that note, I have to play Halo Wars to get onto the Red team train. All I know about them is that Jerome is a badass who hit the flood with a foldable metal chair..

[oddyseye]

Can we get something straight here about Penelope and this whole “Spartan” thing?

Sure, we all know Penelope was from Sparta (well, technically), and we’ve all seen enough 300-inspired pop culture nonsense to think that every Spartan woman must be some spear-wielding, leather-clad, muscle-bound badass. So let’s clear that up once and for all: Penelope was absolutely not that type of Spartan. In fact, that vision of Spartan women is more of a modern fantasy than an actual reflection of Spartan society, and Penelope herself would probably laugh in your face if you tried to pin her down to that archetype.

First off, let’s talk about what it actually meant to be Spartan. Yes, Spartan women had a reputation for being strong, but we need to understand that strength wasn’t defined by throwing a spear or taking down enemies with a shield. Spartan women were celebrated for their physical health and were tasked with producing strong offspring to build the next generation of warriors. They were also responsible for the running of the household when their husbands were off fighting in wars, which meant managing estates, controlling property, and overseeing the everyday operations of Spartan life. So, while Spartan women were not helpless, they weren’t exactly wandering around with weapons, challenging every person who crossed them, either. Penelope’s version of Spartan strength was a little more intellectual, shall we say. For twenty years, while Odysseus was “getting lost” (as one does), Penelope faced down a horde of suitors who were camped out in her house, constantly pressuring her to choose a new husband. Did she pull out a spear and kill them all? No. That’s not what spartan women did. Did she start a war? Absolutely not. Instead, she employed the ultimate weapon: patience. She weaved and un-wove a shroud for years as a stalling tactic, keeping the suitors at bay. Sure, there’s no sword involved, but let’s be real: that takes more cunning than any weapon ever could. Spartan women are not known for fighting, but for surviving.

Penelope’s Spartan roots may have given her the ability to endure, to manage her household, and to outsmart the suitors who had overrun Ithaca, but we’re missing the point if we think that means she was out there battling it out like a heroine from some action flick. Her version of strength was mental, not physical. Instead of wielding a spear, Penelope wielded her intellect, her wit, and her ability to play the long game. If you’re expecting Penelope to start slaying suitors left and right, or charging into battle with a sword in hand, you’re setting yourself up for disappointment.

Pop culture would love to turn Penelope into a spear-wielding warrior queen, but the actual historical context is far more subtle and far more impressive. She was Spartan in the most meaningful sense of the word: resilient, strategic, and damn clever. Penelope did not need muscles at all. She had the power of endurance — something a spear can’t give you.

[justmenoworries]

I think not enough people in the Greek Mythology Fandom™️ talk about the fact that Athena was kind of a Pick Me and Ares was kind of a feminist, actually.

Modern depictions of the two really like to make Ares into a dumb brute who hates all women because obviously God of War = Mysoginist Macho and Athena is a Feminist Icon because she is a woman and also a War God.

When, according to mythology Athena:

Was the biggest fucking Daddy's Girl and took her father Zeus' side in damn near everything. Y'know, the god who is notorious for assaulting women, both divine and mortal, knocking them up and then doing nothing when his jealous wife comes after them.

Said in The Euminides that her emerging from Zeus' forehead means she has no mother and so she has no love for women and will always rule in favor of men

Was practically the mascot goddess of Athens, one of the most anti-women cities to ever exist, even by ancient Greece standard

Did nothing when Persephone was kidnapped by Hades despite being present

while Ares meanwhile

Was the father and patron of the Amazons, a whole culture of badass warrior women

Once went on trial because he brutally murdered a son of Poseidon for sexually assaulting his daughter Alcippe (Ares won that trial, by the way)

Is literally the only male god in the entire pantheon who has never sexually assaulted a woman, all of his relationships were consensual (the bar is in Tartarus here, but nonetheless)

Has Gynaecothoenas, which translates to "the god feasted on by women", among his many epithets, from the time the women of Tegea (Arcadia) took up arms against and defeated a Spartan invasion, then organized an entire feast in honor of Ares which only women were allowed to partake in.

That's not to say Ares doesn't have negative qualities and that Athena doesn't have positive ones. I just find it really interesting the assumptions Greek Mythology Fandom™️ tends to make about these two just from knowing what their basic deal is.

Like, obviously Athena must be a feminist, since she's a badass female warrior and has a high position in a society as notoriously patriarchal as the Greek pantheon.

And surely Ares, the god embodying the brutality of war, must be dripping toxic masculinity, hate women and endorse violence against them.

Right?

[a-midwest-irishman]

Halo, the Human-Covenant War : Thoughts

An absolutely mind-boggling apart of the Halo franchise that still sticks with me is the absolute lack of fanfare and adoration that is thrown the UNSC Marine Corp and Army's way.

In the games, we really do get used to the idea of being the badass Master Chief; kickin' ass and takin' names. Stopping the Halo rings from firing not once, but two times, stopping the genocidal campaign of the Covenant, falling from space and walking away with ya boys.

Don't get me wrong! The Chief is awesome and the games are great, but I feel like a large part of the community who aren't exactly well versed in the lore don't give enough of their respect to the average human soldiers who, for roughly 30 years, fought on both ground and in space against enemies who outmanned, outclassed, and outgunned them. But, they just kept on fighting.

UNSC Marines coming in and holding off the decimation of one colony world after another, fighting ferociously for every inch of soil, filling the grotesque bodies of grunts, jackals, elites, and so on with lead! We may very well have been heavily outclassed in space warfare, but on ground it became a much more even playing field.

Thousands of years of becoming versed in warfare pays off when having to face against genocidal aliens. For 30 years we held them off, and thanks to the Great Schism we were able to be victorious.

Of course, we're it not for the actions of the Master Chief, Noble Team, and many other Spartans we would be annihilated. But, without the selfless actions of the myriad men and women of the UNSC who chose to not go gentle into that good night, but rather face the overbearing might of an Alien empire dead set on our extermination. Inferior technology? Insufficient biology? No matter. They fought regardless.

"In memory of those who died in defense of Earth and her colonies."

[rauthschild]

It may have escaped the notice of our dumbed down and desperate population-at-large, but the Romans borrowed virtually all the culture they ever had from the Greeks, and unfortunately, the Ancient Greeks, especially the Spartans, who the Romans most admired, practiced institutionalized sodomy.

The Romans followed suit as they did in most things Greco-Roman, and soon, the Roman Legions were engaging in the "rites" which paired young acolytes with experienced masters in the military.

Thus, sodomy became a tradition in both the Greek and Roman military and generations of people throughout the Middle East practiced sodomy. It has remained a feature of military forces to a greater or lesser extent ever since.

The most common form of rape in the military does not involve men and women.

The American Military has been impacted by this, too, with many World War I and World War II veterans returning home as either bisexuals or dedicated homosexuals.

Nobody ever talks about this. We try to ignore it, gloss it over, look the other way. The Academics who know about it, shove it under the dusty rug as "history" and fail to enlighten the rest of us.

Nonetheless, there it is, and that's where it came from: the Ancient Greeks and Romans.

The Greeks, for their part, got this "tradition" from the Babylonians, who got it from their own peculiar sex-as-sacrament religion.

Sparta, the most famous practitioner among the Greeks, formalized this tradition of military sodomy by overtly pairing young boys with specific captains for their "initiation" and "training".

Rome did the same.

Sodomy and slavery went hand-in-hand in Roman society outside the military as another result; once a Roman returned home from his obligatory service to Rome, the habits of the military remained ingrained and many of Rome's most illustrious statesmen and senior politicians owned multiple "puer delicata" boy slaves used as sexual toys.

Much to the frustration of their wives.

In this way, the Roman family structure was degraded and the Patrician class, especially, was worn down by sex-based intrigues.

You get some echoes of all this from Homer and from the Roman poets and even some PBS offerings like "I, Claudius", but a more blatant and flat-footed discussion of this is needed to get the impact across to the American Public.

This Big Push to normalize sodomy is coming from Europe and from largely military sources. It's not sourced in New York or Las Vegas. It's coming from Hamburg and Vienna and Paris and Bern.

And it's coming directly from the military.

That may seem counter-intuitive, as everyone knows the Nazis were badasses on the battlefield (so were the Ancient Spartans) and that seems to run counter to the frivolity of men prancing around half-naked with rainbow colored hair shouting Liberal slogans --but you must know what you are dealing with.

The Romans admired the Greeks, and the Nazis admired the Romans. So the Nazis aped the Romans like the Romans aped the Greeks and as the Greeks aped the Babylonians.

Monkey see, monkey do.

On top of all their other odd beliefs that seem at complete odds with their dictum, "Kirche, Kinder, Kuche" applied to their wives, the Nazis practiced sodomy in the ranks and thought nothing of it.

Just like the boys at prestigious British private schools (perversely called "public schools" in Britain) and Universities indulge in every kind of sex imaginable and are often involved in homosexual liaisons by the age of eleven.

This focus on sex-sex-and-more-sex comes direct to us from Ancient Babylon, through Greece, through Rome, through Britain, through Germany--- and it lives and breathes and gains ground because it is rife and "traditional" in the European Military, not because of quiet middle-aged homos living together in Somerset or because of Flamers like Liberace parading around.

As a result of NATO and UN "Peacekeeping" Forces and other occasions requiring hobnobbing between American (U.S.) and European military forces for years on end, there has been explosive growth of sodomy in our own military, which inevitably comes home to the dinner table in places like Gatsville, Nebraska.

It festers. It causes guilt in some and rage in others. It gives rise to crimes of violence against women and children, scandals that tear families apart, declining birth rates, alcoholism, broken families and broken hearts.

Sodomy does not deserve to be "taught" or justified as a military tradition, but we can't escape the fact that it has been and still is. We have to recognize that it's not coming to us from a "bunch of liberal faggots" who stumbled on anal sex in a college dorm room.

It's coming straight to us from Babylon and by a route that most people would never suspect -- our own military; and, it continues to create social and psychological upheaval long after military service ends.

We tend to assume that the terrors and misery and PTSD so many veterans suffer is uniquely the result of experiences on the battlefield, but the memory of being gang-raped by other soldiers is even more traumatic for many.

Unlike talking about a battle or even having to kill someone in particular, a shroud of silence hangs over all of this. It's not only too painful, it's too shameful to talk about. So the victims suffer in silence and rage that cannot be expressed, or by some homemade, limping forward, come to terms with it, and though injured, move on.

Why do men talk to me about things like this, when they wouldn't tell their best friend, their wives, or their mothers? They come to me for help and healing. They let all the ugly things come out and roll around like so many little demons released from jail.

Sometimes they just walk up to me and fall into my arms and weep. I am left standing there in a Walgreens parking lot with a sobbing stranger who is crying so hard he can't even say his name.

I hold their hands, and tell them that in the great realm of Heaven, it's all known and accounted for. They don't suffer alone. Indeed, we all suffer with them, because they are a part of us, and they have been harmed physically, emotionally, intellectually, and spiritually by military service.

Sadly, broken as they are, they too often come home and harm others, or harm themselves, or "fail to adjust" or as a young friend did just last year, hang themselves in the garage once they get back home.

We've got to wake up and we've got to say, "No!".

These men and now, women, are being ritualistically abused in the name of military discipline. If they are not physically raped, as many are, they are nonetheless reduced and compromised and battered and brain-washed beyond belief.

We cannot stand around and let the Perpetrators of these "traditions" continue. They cannot be allowed to fill the senior ranks of our military by a process of secret love relationships and blackmail.

Babylon fell, Greece fell, Rome fell, Nazi Germany fell, Britain is falling --- and if we don't face reality, America will fall, too.

Ancient Sparta fell first to a slave rebellion; the warriors were away fighting, and the slaves just took over and raped the wives and retrained the children. The final death blow was struck when the Visigoths arrived and did the same to the slaves.

Sparta, that once-proud and independent city, that stood virtually alone against the vastness of the Persian Empire, was reduced to flames and left vacant, its pale stones like half-buried bones in the clay, trampled on by fur-clad, club-carrying Visigoths.

All (military) glory is fleeting.

The glory of love, of righteous action, of compassion, of wisdom, of courage, these victories of the heart are what remain.

We ask for every man and woman now alive to examine their hearts and engage their minds, to admit their full experience in life, to grapple with their demons, and to emerge victorious.

We've told bitter truths here today, and bitter they remain; still, we cannot solve a problem we cannot see, or salve a wound if we don't know it exists.

The practice of sodomy as a "military tradition" has to end. We must free our soldiers from it, and free ourselves of the cultural consequences, too.

Most of all, we have to stop thinking that this sudden "Rainbow Revolution" is a result of liberalism or a matter of personal choice in the bedroom.

This is the predictable and known result of an evil practice of institutionalized sodomy in military circles; it is designed to embarrass and subjugate and compromise individuals on a lifetime basis. And it has to be stopped, once and for all.

[salt-cedar]

I don't like the word badass. To me, it sounds cheap and also cheapens everything surrounding it. It is pure bias but when I read smth like "Spartan women were incredibly badass", I, l having zero knowledge of aincient Spartan society, immediately doubt everything that is written by this person. I just find it hard to believe that anyone who is truly educated in any subject would use it. It's just so childish.

[eternally--mortal]

So right now I’m stuck between two headcanons, and I’m going to need some help picking a favorite.

(Warning: insanely long post filled with Geeking and Greeking out, with lots of references to mythology)

Headcanon One: Annabeth is Penelope (from the Odyssey)

Honestly, I’ve lived for years with the opinion that Annabeth is a first generation soul, but I’ve come to the recent conclusion that, if she were reborn, the only acceptable soul for her would be Penelope’s.

(There are some good arguments to be made for her being Odysseus, but I don’t like that theory, largely because Odysseus is a grade A dick—which we’ll get into later, don’t worry—and that Penelope totally deserved better, which I think Annabeth gets through Percy, among other things.)

Now some of you might be saying, ‘yeah, I get it. Penelope is a badass who totally tricked all of those idiot suitors. But she also spent all of that time crying. And not fighting back. That just doesn’t sound like Annabeth to me.’

Let me remind you: Odysseus was gone for twenty years. He took all of the fighting men with him. Which meant there was no one at home to raise the local boys into civilized Greeks who respected women, and there were also no respectable men to speak up for Odysseus’ family. Telemachus was a baby when Odysseus sailed off to war, and he didn’t have anyone to train him like his dad had. No hunting wild boars and getting insane scars like Odysseus did as a kid. Penelope was raising Telemachus alone, and she couldn’t afford to put up a fuss, or else these immature men-children would have killed her child. In fact, at the beginning of the Odyssey, the suitors are flirting a bit too closely with the idea of murdering Telemachus.

Which brings us to Greek culture at the time, beginning with an anecdote about the Romans (bear with me).

Let’s remember that, in the Homeric cycle + Virgil’s official fanfiction, Rome was born from the remnants of Troy. Aeneas (a son of Venus) fled to Carthage where he married their queen Dido, knocked her up, and then ditched her while he ran off to marry some other chick and build the Roman Empire, all because the gods told him to.

(I’m going somewhere with this. I promise)

Well, the Romans must’ve had some guilt over the shit that Aeneas put Dido through, because they decided to give women marriage rights. By which I mean? You guessed it!

Divorce.

Roman women got to own their own property. And they got to keep it when they married, which meant that they could divorce their husbands and still retain all of their property.

The Greeks? Not so much.

Greek women were educated, mainly for the purpose of running a household and managing finances. But most of them were kept inside the household and away from contact with men. When they did go outside, Greek women had various layers of dress to hide them from prying eyes. Too hot in the summer? Bring a parasol. Wear a giant hat. But those layers stayed on. These women had no ownership of their property. In fact, in many ways they were property. And they had absolutely no rights to divorce.

Now let’s think about the women of the Trojan war.

Note for a moment that Helen and Clytemnestra were Penelope’s cousins. Also note that these three all endured great suffering because they were women trapped in a society that treated them like possessions.

(I mean, the Spartans weren’t like that. But the general conglomerate that we understand to be ‘Ancient Greece’ were. At least, as far as my limited research is concerned)

Helen had a whole hoard of suitors vying for her hand before she married Menelaus (and, I would like to note, that Odysseus was one of those suitors). And they weren’t exactly the most peaceful crowd. After she was married off to Menelaus, there would have been no legal escape. It didn’t matter that Helen loved/lusted-after/whatever-you-want-to-call-it Paris. Legally, she was trapped.

So what did she do?

She ran away with him.

And it turned into a giant bloody mess.

People like to blame Helen for starting a massive war, but you know what? Screw all of those people. Or, better not, like the women of Lysistrata, for gods sakes stop screwing them. Because the real problem here is definitely the fact that these women had absolutely no autonomy.

(I promise this will come back around to Annabeth eventually. I’m just trying to make a point here.)

Clytemnestra? She had an affair while her husband was away because ten years is an awful long time to be alone in a palace where no one takes you seriously because you are a women.

Did you know that she set up this whole chain of Greek towers and posted watchmen at them so they could send fire beacons to let her know that the war was over? And, by the way, those towers were very effective for relaying the message far faster than the soldiers could have sent a person? Far faster than they could sail home?

And everybody else thought that she was totally insane for devising this system. And when she told them that the war was over they didn’t believe her.

Sounds kind of like Cassandra, whom Agamemnon brought home with him as a concubine (right in front of his wife’s salad). And when Cassandra warned him that his wife was going to kill him, he wouldn’t listen to her.

Go read Seneca’s version of the account. His human psychology is incredibly moving, and his portrayal of Clytemnestra is so relatable. She agonizes because she still loves her husband, but she knows that he’ll never forgive her for her affair with Aegisthus. Even though Agamemnon has brought home a concubine war prize. (Oh, and let’s not forget the fact that she’s still rightfully furious that her husband sacrificed their daughter on an alter to the gods so that he could kick up enough wind to sail his fleet to Troy and go retrieve Clytemnestra’s twin sister Helen who didn’t want to be retrieved) In her despair at the ever-growing guilt and frustration, Clytemnestra decides that the only way forward is further into the pit. And, frankly, in the society she’s stuck in, she may be right.

But Penelope is smart. She’s the only one to minimize the damage to the people she loves. She gets a remotely happy ending after twenty years of suffering because she bides her time and plays the game. Penelope is clever, she is quick on her feet, she knows the rules, and she knows exactly how to use them.

Sounding like Annabeth yet?

Now of course, the next question would be: But I thought Penelope loved Odysseus. Why would she ever leave him in the underworld to be reborn if she could be dead with him forever?

As I said before, Odysseus is a dick.

Penelope had to rely on a husband because her autonomy was stripped from her. The only people who could really save her would have been her supposedly-dead husband, or her son. The rest of the men on Ithaca were either too old or were trying to force her into a marriage so that they could be king. A marriage that she had successfully managed to hold off for twenty years, all while managing to ration the palace’s resources (But it’s not like a woman could rule an island, right? Not like she’s intelligent or clever enough for that).

In the Odyssey where we’re reminded over and over again that Athena is a force to be reckoned with, and that Odysseus is only still alive because Athena keeps interceding on his behalf, even down to the very last minute—which Zeus had made illegal, by the way (see my Percy as Achilles post for more information on that), it’s fascinating for us to see Penelope treated so poorly. But look at the way Odysseus treats Athena. She appears to him in person (super illegal) and she has to chew him out because he tries to yell at her and say that she hasn’t helped him at all and that he’s had to do it all by himself.

By himself, huh? Like all those times his pride got his shipmates—his own people over whom he was meant to be a fatherly king—killed? Just like how he sat and cried on Calypso’s island for seven years instead of trying to find a way off? Like how he totally stopped trying to get home when he was hanging out with Circe? And he impregnated her???? (Which isn’t in the Odyssey itself, but is explained later in the Homeric cycle when his and Circe’s bastard son comes back and kills Odysseus and takes Penelope for a wife. Yeah, great ending for Penelope right there. Thanks, Odysseus. Oh, and the sources I looked at indicated that Minerva ordered the marriage. Apparently Athena/Minerva is used to ordering people around about whom they should or should not marry. . . I don’t even want to dig into that . . . ).

And then, when Odysseus does come home, he hides himself from Penelope and decides that he has to test her to see if she’s still faithful to him.

Seriously, like her twenty-years of clever maneuvering and patient suffering weren’t enough for him.

And, yet again I want to remind everyone that Odysseus would have just as eagerly married Helen. That he happened to get lucky that Menelaus was chosen instead, and that Penelope was as intelligent and marvelous as she was. And that she was so faithful to him even though he never seemed to show her the same respect.

Right. Because Penelope is the one who needed to prove herself.

There’s no way that a woman with that level of intelligence would sit in the Underworld, watching dead souls enter who talk about how society is progressing and women have rights now, remembering all the times her husband cheated on her, and how his bastard son killed him and forced her into marriage at the behest of an angsty Roman craft goddess with a personality disorder, and everything else — there’s no way she would have processed all that and not wanted rebirth, in my opinion.

And, if we follow my theory that the rebirth process chooses your future life based on your past development and growth, it’s only logical that Penelope could be a daughter of Athena.

And that Athena would know her soul.

And that Athena would love her as a favorite daughter.

Until Percy Jackson complicates everything.

At this point I would like to reiterate that, in spite of all of Odysseus’ ungrateful sass, he was, like, Athena’s favorite mortal. She blessed him. She loved his clever mind and his snark. She forgave his hubris endlessly because he was her person. She was so proud of that little shit.

I would also like to point out that Poseidon spends most of the Odyssey viciously trying to kill Odysseus. Poseidon knew that Athena liked him. He may have had multiple reasons to target Odysseus, but Athena was no doubt on his mind the whole time. Especially when she kept trying and succeeding at stopping him. She put a lot of work into helping Odysseus triumph over Poseidon.

So you can understand why Athena might be a little extra upset if Penelope/Annabeth is suddenly falling in love with Poseidon’s favorite son.

Who, if you agree with my pre-existing headcanon, also happens to be Achilles.

That would piss Odysseus off so much.

I can imagine Odysseus sneaking his way out of the underworld through the doors of death and managing to stay hidden when the doors were officially closed, successfully using his wily tricks to avoid Thanatos —Possibly with a little help from his favorite goddess. I can picture him hunting down Percy to kill him. Until Annabeth steps in the way and has to tell her ex-husband (wow, is that ever a weird revelation for her) to get lost. At which point he decides he needs to kill her and drag her back to the underworld with him.

There are booby traps everywhere for the next few months. Fancy contraptions. He starts with little gifts at their door—mini ‘trojan horses’—and escalates when he realizes that obviously Penelope is going to know better than to let this Poseidon-son-Achilles-devil-child open a mysterious package that might very well be from her ex.

Odysseus finally catches Percy alone and is all “You stole my wife!”

And Percy has to be like “It’s the 21st century, dude. I’m pretty sure Annabeth can speak for herself. I can’t make her do anything. That’s why I love her.”

At which point Annabeth springs a trap on Odysseus. Because he’s been so fixated on Achilles’ usual brute force that he doesn’t consider that Percy might have learned something from Annabeth, and that the two of them might know how to work together. He doesn’t even begin to consider that Percy, unlike Odysseus, knows how to communicate with his significant other, and that he knows when to ask for help.

(Also, fun fact for those of you who want Annabeth to always have an ‘A’ name, Penelope’s original name was “Arnacia” or “Arnaea”.)

The other headcanon is, of course, that Sally Jackson is Penelope.

Consider, for a second, the idea that all mortals who can see through the mist were originally participants in the original myths —Not demigods necessarily. You’ll notice that Achilles was really the main Greek demigod to participate in the Trojan war. Not only was Achilles the son of Thetis, but his father, Pelius, was a son of Zeus. Odysseus? A legacy multiple generations back, maybe, but not a demigod. Neither were Menelaus or Agamemnon. All of these people were involved with the gods, but they weren’t really direct relatives. (Although Helen was a daughter of Zeus, as was her twin sister, Clytemnestra. Go girl power, I guess. And I should probably mention that Penelope’s dad was the king of Sparta, and that her mom was a naiad. But the men! The men were mostly mortal).

The point is that, godly blood or not, those involved would retain some of the blessings they had in their first lives.

Luke’s mom, Percy’s mom, Rachel Elizabeth Dare—all of them would have lived lives intricately tied with the gods, creating an impression of the mythical world that carried from one life to the next.

Just take a look at what Penelope went through and tell me it doesn’t sound like a palace full of Gabe Ugliano’s ordering her around for more beer and bean dip and trying to kill off her annoying brat so they could take the throne and live easy off bean dip forever.

Imagine Sally Jackson instinctually knowing ‘I’ve been through worse. If this is what it takes to protect my son, I’ll do it.’

Also, gotta love the complete reversal where she gets to know Poseidon and falls in love with him knowing who he is because she’s Finally Found A Man Who Won’t Hide His Identity From Her Or Test Her For Her Loyalty. So that man happens to be the god who made her ex’s life hell. So what? Poseidon is an emotional person. At least he’s upfront about it.

Odysseus crawls his way out of the Underworld and confronts Sally going “You slept with the murderous god who ruined my life and kept me from coming home?! And look at this disgusting monstrosity that you produced!” *gesturing to Percy who may or may not also be Achilles*

Sally politely reminds him that she’s not his wife anymore, and that she still has access to a certain mythical creature’s head, and that if he doesn’t stop threateningly gesturing to her son she will have two ex-husbands on display in the Museum of Modern Art.

[booklindworm]

A rant against Karen Traviss' understanding of history and her FAQ answers

Did you base the Mandalorians on the Spartans?

<cite> No. I didn't. </cite> Fair enough.

<cite> I really wish history was taught properly - okay, taught at all - in schools these days, because history is the big storehouse that I plunder for fiction. It breaks my heart to hear from young readers who have no concept even of recent history - the last fifty years - and so can't see the parallels in my books. You don't have to be a historian to read my novels, but you'll get a lot more out of them if you explore history just a little more. Watch a history channel. Read a few books. Visit some museums. Because history is not "then" - it's "now." Everything we experience today is the product of what's happened before. </cite> Yeah, I do to. Please, Ms Traviss, go on, read some books. Might do you some good. And don't just trust the history channels. Their ideas about fact-checking differ wildly.

<cite> But back to Mandos. Not every military society is based on Sparta, strange as that may seem. In fact, the Mandos don't have much in common with the real Spartans at all. </cite> You mean apart from the absolute obsession with the military ["Agoge" by Stephen Hodkinson], fearsome reputation ["A Historical Commentary on Thucydides" by David Cartwright], their general-king ["Sparta" by Marcus Niebuhr Tod], the fact that they practically acted as mercenaries (like Clearch/Κλέαρχος), or the hyper-confidence ("the city is well-fortified that has a wall of men instead of brick" [Plutarch, Life of Lycurgus])...

<cite> A slightly anarchic, non-centralized, fightin' people? Sounded pretty Celtic to me. Since I went down that path, I've learned more about the Celts (especially the Picts), and the more I learn, the more I realise what a dead ringer for Mandos they are. But more of how that happened later... </cite>

The Celtic people are more than one people, more than one culture. Celtic is a language-family! In the last millennium BC nearly every European ethnic group was in some ways Celtic, and they were not one. Later, after the Germanic tribes (also not one people, or a singular group) moved westwards, the Celtic cultures were still counted in the hundreds. Not only Scotland was Celtic! Nearly all of Western Europe was (apart from the Greek and Phoenician settlers on the Mediterranean coasts). The word “Celts” was written down for the first time by Greek authors who later also used the word “Galatians”. The Romans called these people “Gauls”, and this word was used to describe a specific area, bordered by the Atlantic Ocean, the Cévennes and the Rhine: “Gaul”. So the Celts, the Galatians and the Gauls were all part of the same Celtic civilisation. "Celts, a name applied by ancient writers to a population group occupying lands mainly north of the Mediterranean region from Galicia in the west to Galatia in the east [] Their unity is recognizable by common speech and common artistic traditions" [Waldman & Mason 2006] Mirobrigenses qui Celtici cognominantur. Pliny the Elder, The Natural History; example: C(AIUS) PORCIUS SEVERUS MIROBRIGEN(SIS) CELT(ICUS) -> not just one culture "Their tribes and groups eventually ranged from the British Isles and northern Spain to as far east as Transylvania, the Black Sea coasts, and Galatia in Anatolia and were in part absorbed into the Roman Empire as Britons, Gauls, Boii, Galatians, and Celtiberians. Linguistically they survive in the modern Celtic speakers of Ireland, Highland Scotland, the Isle of Man, Wales, and Brittany." [Celtic Culture: a historical encyclopedia. by John Koch] "[] the individual CELTIC COUNTRIES and their languages, []" James, Simon (1999). The Atlantic Celts – Ancient People Or Modern Invention. University of Wisconsin Press. "All Gaul is divided into three parts, one of which the Belgae live, another in which the Aquitani live, and the third are those who in their own tongue are called Celtae, in our language Galli." [Julius Caesar, De Bello Gallico] <= I had to translate that in school. It's tedious political propaganda. Read also the Comentarii and maybe the paper "Caesar's perception of Gallic social structures" that can be found in "Celtic Chiefdom, Celtic State," Cambridge University Press. The Celtic tribes and nations were diverse. They were pretty organized, with an academic system, roads, trade, and laws. They were not anarchic in any way. They were not warriors - they were mostly farmers. The Celts were first and foremost farmers and livestock breeders

The basic economy of the Celts was mixed farming, and, except in times of unrest, single farmsteads were usual. Owing to the wide variations in terrain and climate, cattle raising was more important than cereal cultivation in some regions.

Suetonius addressing his legionaries said "They are not soldiers—they're not even properly equipped. We've beaten them before." [not entirely sure, but I think that was in Tacitus' Annals]

Regarding the Picts, in particular, which part of their history is "anarchic"? Dál Riata? the Kingdom of Alba? Or are you referring to the warriors that inspired the Hadrian's Wall? Because no one really knows in our days who the fuck they were. The Picts’ name first appears in 297 AD. That is later. <cite> Celts are a good fit with the kind of indomitable, you-can't-kill-'em-off vibe of the Mandos. Reviled by Rome as ignorant savages with no culture or science, and only fit for slaughter or conquest, the Celts were in fact much more civilized than Rome even by modern standards. </cite> That's how the Romans looked at pretty much every culture that wasn't Greek, Roman, Phoenician, Egyptian, or from Mesopotamia (read, if you want, anything Roman or Greek about the Skyths, the Huns, Vandals, Garamantes...).

<cite> They also kicked Roman arse on the battlefield, and were very hard to keep in line, so Rome did what all lying, greedy superpowers do when challenged: they demonized and dehumanized the enemy. (They still used them in their army, of course, but that's only to be expected.) </cite> They were hard to keep in line, but they most definitely did not kick Roman arse on the battlefield. Roman arse was kicked along the borders of the Roman Empire, such as the Rhine, the Danube, the Atlas mountains, etc. And mostly by actually badly organized, slightly anarchic groups, such as the Goths or the Huns (BTW the Huns were not a Germanic people, even though early 20th century British propaganda likes to say so). Though they were also decisively stopped by the Parthians. Who were very organized. Ah well. <cite> While Rome was still leaving its unwanted babies to die on rubbish dumps - a perfectly acceptable form of family planning to this "civilisation" - and keeping women as chattels devoid of rights, the barbarian Celts had a long-standing legal system that not only gave women what we would think of as equal rights, but also protected the rights of the elderly, children, and the disabled. They had a road network across Europe and worldwide trade long before the Romans ever got their act together. And their science - well, their astronomical calculations were so sophisticated that it takes computers to do the same stuff today. </cite> See? You even say yourself that they weren't actually anarchic. Also you're not completely right: 1. women (of most Celtic cultures, with one notable exception being the Irish) were not allowed to become druids, e.g. scientists, physicians, priests, or any other kind of academics, so they did not have equal rights. Also, as in other Indo-European systems, the family was patriarchal. 2. the roads they had were more like paths, and did not span the entirety of Europe; the old roads that are still in use are nearly all of them Roman. Had the Celtic inhabitants of Gallia or Britannia built comparable roads, why would the Romans have invested in building a new system on top? 3. world-wide? Yeah, right. They traded with those who traded with others and so were able to trade with most of southern Eurasia and northern Africa, as well as few northern parts (Balticum, Rus), but that's (surprise) not the whole world. 4. most people use computers for those calculations you mention because its easier. It's not necessary. I can do those calculations - give me some time to study astronomy (I'm a math major, not physics) and some pencils and paper. 5. and - I nearly forgot - the kids didn't die. That was a polite fiction. The harsh truth is that most Roman slaves were Romans... <cite> So - not barbarians. Just a threat to the empire, a culture that wouldn't let the Pax Romana roll over it without a fight. (Except the French tribes, who did roll over, and were regarded by the Germanic Celts [...]) </cite> WTF Germanic Celts? What are you smoking, woman? Isn't it enough that you put every culture speaking a language from the Celtic family in one pot and act as if they were one people, now you have to mix in a different language-family as well? Shall we continue that trend? What about the Mongolian Celts, are they, too, proof that the Celts were badass warriors? I think at this point I just lost all leftover trust in your so-called knowledge. <cite> [...] as being as bad as the Romans. Suck on that, Asterix... </cite> Asterix was definitely a Celt, and unlike the British Celts, he was not a citizen of the Roman Empire.

<cite> Broad brush-stroke time; Celts were not a centralized society but more a network of townships and tribes, a loose alliance of clans who had their own internal spats, but when faced with some uppity outsider would come together to drive off the common threat. </cite> They might have tried, but they didn't. The first and only time a Celtic people really managed to drive off some uppity outsider would be 1922 following the Anglo-Irish Treaty of 1921*. The fact that France, Spain, Portugal speak Romance languages and the British (or Irish) Isles nearly uniformly speak English should be proof enough.

*Unless you count Asterix. <cite> You couldn't defeat them by cutting off the head. There was no head to cut off. </cite> You mean unlike Boudica and Vercingetorix. Oh wait. Tacitus, in his Annals, said that Boudica's last fight cost 80,000 Britons and 400 Romans their lives. He was probably exaggerating. But it definitely stopped much of the British resistance in its tracks. <cite> To the centralized, formal, rather bureaucratic Romans, for whom the city of Rome was the focus of the whole empire, this was a big does-not-compute. The Celts were everything they didn't understand. And we fear what we don't understand, and we kill what we fear. </cite> While that is totally true, it's also completely off the mark. The Romans demonized the druids, not every Celt, and they were afraid of what was basically an academic network. That had nothing to do with war. <cite> Anyway, Mandos....once I took a single concept - in this case, the idea of clans that operated on a loose alliance system, like the Celts - the rest grew organically. I didn't plan it out in detail from the start. </cite> That's really obvious. Maybe looking at some numbers and remembering that you weren't planning a small, local, rural, medieval community would have helped, too. I mean lets have a look at, say, Scotland (since you specifically mentioned the Picts): they still have less than 6 mio. people all together, and that's today. Mandalore is a sector. A sector of Outer Space with at least 2000 inhabited planets. How do you think that translates? It doesn't. <cite> I just asked myself what a culture of nomadic warriors would value, how they would need to operate to survive, and it all grew inexorably by logical steps. The fact that Mandos ended up as very much like the Celts is proof that the technique of evolving a character or species - find the niche, then work out what fits it - works every time. It creates something very realistic, because that's how real people and real societies develop. </cite> Celtic people were usually not nomadic! And, once again, non of them were predominantly warriors! It's really hard to be a nomadic farmer. I believe the biggest mistake you made, Ms Traviss, is mixing up the Iron Age (and earlier) tribes that did indeed sack Rome and parts of Greece, and that one day would become the people the Romans conquered. And apart from the Picts they really were conquered. <cite> So all I can say about Mandos and Spartans is that the average Mando would probably tell a Spartan to go and put some clothes on, and stop looking like such a big jessie. </cite>

I'd really like to see a Mando – or anyone – wearing full plate without modern or Star Wars technology in Greece. Happy heatstroke. There is a reason they didn't wear a lot (look up the Battle of Hattîn, where crusaders who didn't wear full helmets and wore chainmail* still suffered badly from heat exhaustion). [Nicolle, David (1993), Hattin 1187: Saladin's Greatest Victory] *chainmail apparently can work like a heatsink CONCLUSION You're wrong. And I felt offended by your FAQ answers. QUESTION You're English. You're from England. A group - a nation - that was historically so warlike and so successful that by now we all speak English. A nation that definitely kicked arse against any Celtic nation trying to go against them (until 1921, and they really tried anyway). A nation that had arguably the largest Empire in history. A nation that still is barbaric and warlike enough that a lost football game has people honestly fearing for their lives.

Also, a Germanic group, since you seem to have trouble keeping language-families and cultures apart. If we were to talk about the family, we could add on the current most aggressively attacking nation (USA) plus the former most aggressively attacking nations (the second and third German Reich), also the people who killed off the Roman Empire for good (the Goths and Visigoth), the original berserkers (the Vikings) and claim at the very least the start of BOTH WORLD WARS. Why did you look further?

Some other sources:

Histoire de la vie privée by Georges Duby and Philippe Ariès, the first book  (about the antiquity) I read it translated, my French is ... bad to non-existent

The Day of the Barbarians: The Battle That Led to the Fall of the Roman Empire  (about the Huns) by Alessandro Barbero

If you speak Dutch or German, you might try

Helmut Birkhan: Kelten. Versuch einer Gesamtdarstellung ihrer Kultur, Verlag der Österreichischen Akademie der Wissenschaften, Wien

Janssens, Ugo, De Oude Belgen. Geschiedenis, leefgewoontes, mythe en werkelijkheid van de Keltische stammen. Uitgeverij The House of Books

DISCLAIMER

I’m angry and I wrote this down in one session and thus probably made some mistakes. I’m sorry. Or maybe I’m not sorry. I’m still angry. She can’t know who reads her FAQ and at least two of her answers (on her professional website) were offensive to the reader.

[trippygalaxy]

I fucking LIVE for spartan culture and just UGH!!!!

In sparta, the women were HIGHLY respected and had so much freedom (compared to other women during that time), so much so that many mother have said to their sons that they either return victorious or on their shield. Which basically means, you come back a winner or dead, you will not fail us or Sparta.

SO FIERCE BEFORE HE BECAME A SPIRIT/MASK THING WOULD HAVE A BADASS MA AND RESPECTS WOMEN SO FUCKING MUCH

But even when in his mask form, where hes trapped in the Spartan helmet he wore as a general, he will not harm unarmed or injured women out of respect. Now if they raised arms to him and tried to fight him, he will not hold back in that same respect, for he knows women are just as capable as men.

KINDA RANDOM BUT NOT?

His helmet has like….hold on

He has that feathery like thing coming from his helmet, right??? Hear me out…its his actual hair- like captain marvel in the comics!

Which is kinda fucked when you think about it cause when he gets trapped in there, he likely got his head cut off which is why/how that hair is still here! So whoever put on that helmet on for the first time probably smelt nothing but rot

*screams*

Please let someone listen to my rambles about spartan! Fierce deity

Pleasepleasepleasepleasepleasepleasepleasepleaseplease

[invincibleweasel]

Nitpick November: Day 3,4, 5 & 6

Nitpick 3: Why is Penny’s blood green? If we are meant to believe that she was built to blend in with the rest of humanity, why give her such an inhuman colour for her internal fluids? What if Penny got injured while on a mission with her old team, and they see her green blood. Her cover would be blown.  Considering the fact that Penny bleeding in the first place seems to be a new addition to Penny 2.0 which begs the question, why give her the ability to bleed? Why give her the ability to feel pain? These weren’t features she originally had. She shrugged off the truck in Volume 2 like it was nothing, just a scratch. It really brings into question what Pietro was thinking while making Penny 2.0. Nitpick 4:

Adam’s main colour is red, supposedly. Why does he wear predominantly black then? If this was post Fall, I would understand. Wearing more and more black as a visual representation of his growing obsession with Blake, that would’ve been good. But he doesn’t. He wears more black than red in all appearances that we’ve seen him in. What gives? Why not dress him in mostly red for the Black Trailer and then following the Fall he starts to wear more black. 

Nitpick 5: The Colour Naming Rule leaves much to be desired. It isn’t necessarily bad, conceptually. But there’s a lot of loopholes that come with it. Any name can be associated with a colour with enough leaps in logic and reaching. And that isn’t even getting into the fact that it doesn’t even have to be the first name that is colour associated. Just the last name will do. It’s why we have names like Jacques, James and Ghira which have no colour meaning, but are still accepted as following the rule because of their last names.  What’s stopping them from naming characters generic names? Weiss Schnee could easily be named Karen Schnee, after all, she gets the colour meaning from Schnee, doesn’t she? Even then, you could get a colour out of Karen as it can mean ‘pure’ potentially bringing to mind white. Which brings me to my next issue with the rule, a name’s meaning could bring to mind different colours depending on who you asked. One person might think that ‘pure’ brings to mind white, while another might think of black as a ‘pure’ colour. It’s vague and there’s no objective right or wrong answer to it.  Another problem I have with the rule is that names reference things that don’t exist in Remnant to get their colour meaning. Dr. Bartholomew Oobleck for instance, gets his colour green from the oobleck substance from the Dr. Seuss book Bartholomew and the Oobleck. This wouldn’t be too big of deal if the rule was purely from a meta standpoint. But the rule actually exists in-verse, meaning Dr. Seuss and his books would have to exist too to get this colour meaning. The same applies for Ghira, who takes his name from Bagheera. Does The Jungle Book exist in-verse as well? Nitpick 6:

Heels. Why does almost every female character in this show, regardless of occupation wear some sort of high heels, stilettos or wedges?  Now, this isn’t to say female characters can’t wear heels. They obviously can, and for some characters such as Weiss, Cinder or Glynda it makes perfect sense. It works character wise. But characters like Blake, Pyrrha, Neo, Winter and Raven? Highly trained fighters who partake in a lot of movement while fighting shouldn’t be wearing heels that would likely inhibit said movement. Even Nora in the words of Ein Lee who worked very closely with Monty was originally in high heels and had much longer hair in Monty’s original sketch, before Ein Lee changed it. This honestly wouldn’t be too big of an issue if the creators were a group of women who wanted to make their own show of badass women. But it isn’t. The truth of the matter is that these characters were made and designed by three cishet men. They are the ones who chose to give their spartan inspired character super high platform heels with a mini-skirt and no upper armour. They are the ones who gave a random heart-shaped boob window to their Nordic warrior. They are the ones who gave the audience long lasting shots of a female character’s body for the audience’s enjoyment and nothing else. They are the ones purposely gave their black thief an even skimpier outfit than the one she had originally, just to show off her breasts more.  These were all decisions the creators purposely made regarding their female characters’ designs, who were all minors at the time. The creators have a problem with unnecessarily sexualising their female characters and it needs to stop.

[dreamerandthedarkhalf]

This was the first Halloween where I've been able to be home and pass out candy (in the form of fruit snacks) to colorfully dressed humans of all sizes who knocked on my door. Here are the best things: They were all so polite but many of them were apparently terrified of me answering the door in my blue Halo spartan costume. I had to take the helmet off several times to get some of the smallest small humans to approach the door for their treats. These small humans were so small they could not get up the two steps to my door without their adult helping them. The most terrifying costume tonight was the ~8 year old boy who showed up wearing an amazon workers vest and looked like one of their warehouse people. My absolute favorite was the older girl in a full NASA astronaut uniform. Like. Authentic "I want to be a space scientist IN SPACE" kind of costume. My next favorites after that were the two girls in Buzz and Woody costumes who both had matching tutus :-) Fun costumes of note: the family with a woman in a beautiful white pencil-skirt suit, followed by an adult in the "t-rex" dinosaur costume, escorting the world’s tiniest green dinosaur. the werewolf dad with his werewolf daughter. the small human with a "Scream" robe and mask that actually bled when they pressed a button. the look on the tiny princess' face when I knelt down and took off the Halo mask and saw that just ... positively *feral* look of "HA! WOMEN CAN BE BADASSES IN SPACE, TOO! Just you watch, parents who put me in a dress. Someday, I'm going to kick ass in space, too!" Like. Seriously. You could tell the princess dress wasn't exactly her choice. it was such a fun night. The next time I do this, though, I definitely need to triple the amount of things I have to hand out :-)

[starr-fall-knight-rise]

Emp-Ire “The King.”

“I am starting to think that the oracle was screwing with us.”

“Silence!” One of the men barked, clapping Ramirez across the back of the head with an open palm. Ramirez jerked forward with a grunt of pain, and seeing that, Adam was having the sudden, sneaking suspicion that…. Everything wasn’t what it seemed to be.

At first, the whole thing had screamed of elaborate tourism. Let the tourists show up and think they are going on some cool quest, and then make them overpay to meet with some lady who was just super high, but the way these men were acting…

Adam was beginning to agree with Ramirez.

If their adventure as Sheriff’s deputies had been real then wasn’t there all the likelihood that this was real as well? Just because you show up to someplace exotic doesn't mean it was designed like that to amuse you. He wouldn’t take a hop and a skip over to Japan and just assume that the different customs there were an elaborate ploy to get money off of tourists….

Well maybe on Earth that sort of thing could totally happen, but looking at these men…. Their physiques, their clothing,their weapons, and the very real, point of their spears, he was becoming aware that maybe they had stumbled on something a lot more serious than they had first thought.

Shit.

He seemed to have a habit of doing things like that.

He glanced around at the small contingent of men who walked with them. As he had noticed before each and every one of them was absolutely shredded, not necessarily in the bodybuilder kind of way, but in a way that made it clear these guys never skipped leg day, arm, day or cardio. 

Adam and Ramirez were no slouches; by comparison, both of them hitting the gym at least five times a week for an hour at least, but in comparison?

And of course they didn’t hide it either. 

Each of the men carried a massive circular shield and spears taller than they were. They had on sandals with greaves and simple leather wraps, most of them were bare chested, though their commanding officer wore a breastplate, all of them wore helmets.

“Laconia!” 

His sudden exclamation startled the man as well as Ramirez, 

“Shit, I just realized why that sounded familiar.”

One of the men turned to look at his commanding officer, “I do not think they are Athenians, sir.” He glanced back at Adam, “Too dumb.”

The other men laughed at his expense. Adam frowned, “Sorry my knowledge of ancient greek geographical locations isn’t up to snuff.”

He was silenced with another slap to the head, and with his ears ringing and one eye fuzzy, he finally accepted that this was, in fact, not a joke. Somehow, for some reason that dumbass oracle had sent them out to get potentially sacrificed by a group of Neospartans, and he doubted they were going to be able to sue for damages.

It took almost the whole day to make it to “Sparta” itself, though he became aware of their approaching closeness when small dwellings began appearing on the edge of fields. It was only when he figured out that Spartans needed to eat too that he realized not ALL of them were going to be big buff badasses. Of course, that was until he saw the farmer pulling the plow, who was in fact Hercules’s cousin on his father Zeus’s side.

Okay so maybe things were a bit different.

He was under the impression back during the age of real Sparta, a lot of spartan citizens were just normal people and it was only a select few who were turned into warriors. Women, while they had some rights than in other places, were still expected to stay home and take care of things while the men were off at war. She had to be strong, but that was only because she was expected to raise spartan sons, or something like that. He couldn’t remember exactly how that sort of thing worked, he wasn’t a historian. For all he knew Spartan women were just as shredded as the men.

A truth that seemed apparent for thee spartans because, as they made it to the next little farming house, a woman turned to look at them and damn it was like the Amazons met the spartans. She wasn’t particularly tall by anyone’s standards, but she looked like did mixed martial arts for a living.

He had no doubt she could probably kick his ass.

Ramirez had gone rather silent as he looked around  nodding to himself every so often as they were dragged through the outlying villages and farms, and eventually up a set of stone steps leading into a city which was surrounded by lush medeteranian hills and grasslands on either side.

The city itself was no slouch either. It wasn’t as artistically expressive as New Athens had been, ut there was no shortage of statues, and interesting architecture. Walking down the street, everyone they met was shredded or well on their way to becoming so. The men, the women, everyone but the children.

He noticed a few differences from ancient histories, including but not limited to the fact that the women were just as armored as the men, the many races and ethnicities, and the strange assortment of modern day dogs that roamed the place, which he thought was a strange addition.

A line of marching soldiers passed by wearing their red and gold, and as they went Ramirez turned his head to follow them, “Welp, I am pretty sure I had a dream like this once.”

“Did you dream include us dying horribly?”

“Does being crushed between someone's thighs count?”

Adam sighed and rolled his eyes to the heavens, “how can you be thinking like that at a time like this?”

“How can you not, I am scared and way turned on and it is the most confusing feeling I have ever had in my life…. Aren't you just a little?”

Adam frowned and was surprised to find that, “No, he didn’t think so. He was JEALOUS of plenty of these men, but none of the men or women caught his eye in that way, at least he didn't think so.”

Ramirez stared at him and shook his head sadly.

“What?”

“Still thinking about your breakup huh?”

“No I’m not.”

“Quiet.” One of the men hissed raising a hand to backhand one of them, though he stopped as a voice called out from before them.

“Captain NIcos, you have returned from your patrol.”

It was a woman’s voice this time, and as they looked up an armored figure stepped down from the steps to the columned temple. She wore a bright golden breastplate, knee length red skirt and golden greaves and bracers. An attendant at her shoulder carried her Helm, though she kept hold of her spear and circular shield. She was at least six feet tall and had a body like the she hulk though her face was exceptionally beautiful as well, with large brown eyes and full lips. 

The man raised his spear to her, “Queen Xanthia.”

The man around them raised their spears as well.

She stepped forward over the stone, “What have you found here.” She used the tip of her spear to reach under Ramirez’s chin and tilt his head back, “Athenians?’

“They say they are ‘from Athens, but not “Athenian.” Captain Nicos said shoving Adam forward so he tripped and fell to his knees on the hard stone.

She grunted and turned her attention to him, tilting his head back to look at her, “Is this true, not-an-Athenian.”

He crinched away from the blade of her spear, “I’m Mericandian actually, Terran, Earthling.”

There were a couple grunts of surprise from around the group.

“Tourists.” Ramirez piped in.

Xanthia frowned, raising her chin, “And how did you end up on Laconia. We don’t encourage tourists here.” 

“Would you believe it if I said that asshole of an oracle sent us here.” He raised his hands, “We meant no disrespect of course, we just came here to see the sights and then leave.”

Ramirez nodded.

There was another muttering from the crowd. She had an eyebrow raised, “The oracle you say?”

The two of them nodded again, not sure where this was going.

She turned her head to Captain Nicos, “Keep a close eye on them, I will speak with the king”

She turned on her heels and walked off, passing through the double doors with a swish of her red cloak, leaving the two of them still kneeling on the rough stone.

They turned to look at each other in nervous confusion, not entirely sure where this was going. Overhead the sky had dimmed to a dull blue and torches were being lit all up the city streets. The young man who was doing the lighting had the look of a classic greek hero with tight curly hair and a body borrowed from a demigod.

The two of them didn’t say anything until the doors opened and the queen walked back out, “The king wishes to see the intruders.”

Two guards held the doors opened as they were forced to their feet and up the steps. The interior of the room was bare and blunt, no more than stone pillars and a single uncomfortable throne carved out of sharp marble blocks, on which sat the manliest man he had likely ever seen. Xanthia walked over and sat in the identical throne next to him, and together it seemed as if they were being pulled before the throne of the very gods themselves.

This man was godlike, but not the kind of overly muscled where he can't even touch his own head. This was probably what peak human performance looked like with a neatly shaved beard and thick dark hair. Adam glanced over at Ramirez again, to see the other man was nodding in great approval of this development. He turned his head back to the man who stood very slowly, his armor clinking. He wore a short sword on one hip and carried a spear in one hand, and when he moved, he moved with the grace of someone who knew exactly what he was doing, and where his body was at all times.

He walked down the steps and looked the two of them over with steely golden eyes, like those of a wolf.

His gaze fell on Adam for a long hard moment, “I see we have been graced by the presence of a foreign general.” He said turning back and stepping up the stone steps.

There was a murmuring in the room around them.

Adam blinked in surprise, “You know who I am.”

The Spartan king stood before his seat, but did not sit down, “Well of course.”

He held up his arm so Adam could see the scrolling holographic image across his wrist, “Just because I live like a spartan doesn’t mean I subjugate my life to not knowing what goes on in the universe. In fact as King it is my duty to know what important developments are being made in this galaxy.”

He turned his head to look at Adam ,”I am loyal to this galaxy and the ideals upon which humanity has befriended aliens.” He walked across the stone, “And you Admiral Vir  are an important linchpin in that model.”

He turned to wave a hand at Ramirez, “And of course I know a Marine when I see one.”

Another muttering from around the room.

So, this is sort of not what he expected. The Spartan king was well versed in intergalactic politics, and was no slouch intellectually either.

“So, you’ll let us go then.”

The man did not smile, but the way his eyes twinkled, almost menacingly did not give Adam much hope.

“Oh I never said that.” He turned and paced back in the other direction, “You see, Admiral, I have become aware of an unfortunate pattern in humanity’s political history, and this includes the fall of empires due to poor or weak leaders.” he turned on the spot, “I had given up hope in being able to influence the intergalactic stage, but finding you here has…. Given me an idea.”

Oh no.

“I want to see just what kind of men are being tasked with keeping this galaxy together. I want to know if you can do what needs to be done, when it needs to be done. I want to make sure that my people are in good hands, when their good is out of mine.”

“What are you talking about.”

“I want to make sure you are a brave leader, and that you can fight when is necessary.”

He made a motion with his hands and Ramirez was dragged off to the side.

A group of Spartans stepped up and grabbed Adam around the arms hauling him to his feet.

“Bring him to the training field.” The king said, and the group of men dragged him forward and out the doors.

Adam tried to protest but he was silenced as he was dragged from the doors, down the walkway and into a large lit arena with a sandy dirt floor. A large group of men were practicing here with their spears and shields, but cleared off as soon as an order was barked.

“What are you doing!” Adam demanded

“Consider this your greek trial, Admiral.” The king said taking his own spear and tossing it to Adam, who caught it in one hand, “Fight, and let’s see what you can do.” “But I-”

He was handed a shield, and then the group began to pull back.

The king stepped up onto the arena wall and paced down it’s length, “Lets see if you can beat one of my men first, and we will go from there.”

He motioned a hand and ordered one of the younger men forward. He couldn’t have been that old and was not nearly as well put together as the others, but he held his spear and shield with some confidence.

Ok…. this was going to get interesting.

He knew there was nothing he could do to stop them, so Adam dropped into a crouch.

The shield felt awkward and heavy on his arm, but the spear was a familiar weight. They circled for a short time before the boy came charging at him. He could see what the king was doing. This boy was young and had probably trained repeatedly in drills but had never sued weapons in practice..

He was meant to be easy to beat.

Adam stepped to the side and caught the boy’s foot sending him staggering away. Adam used the shield to knock him further off balance and sent him plowing into the dirt.

No one made a sound.

It wasn’t that impressive. That was SUPPOSED to be easy.

“So at least you have SOME training.” The king called. Overhead a shooting star crossed over the heavens. A crowd trickled onto the stands of the arena.

He motioned someone else forward. She too was young, but the set of her face and a scar down her right cheek showed that she had at least SEEN combat at some point. The way she eyed Adam told him that she knew what she was doing.

Her problem?

She was likely to set i nher fighting abilities, not creative enough. He traded a couple of strikes with her, gaging her ability before making his move. He used his shield as a distraction to cover some of his movement so she couldn't see, and then sent a lightning fast jab. He struck a hit hard on the side of her helmet sending her plowing to the Arena floor.

Still no one made a sound.

The king nodded slowly and motioned someone else forward.

This man was an actual soldier, though likely no great shakes, but at least he knew what he was doing. Adam ended up in a sharp flurry of contact before the shield got in his way and he almost took a hard blow to the shoulder , even so he ended up with a delicate cut along the side of his cheek. It was only by way of quick thinking that he was able to duck under one of the swipes and kick the man hard in the sternum. He went flailing back into the dirt, and Adam couldn’t help but whisper to himself.

“And this is sparta bitch.”

The kind paced around him in a wide circle, “So, someone has trained you in the use of the spear.”

Adam growled, “I was trained to fight aliens with four arms, so you are going to have to try harder.”

The king smiled, “Confidence…. Always a good sign. But the shield, I think you have not been trained to use one of those.”

Adam paused nodded, and then threw the shield to the ground kicking it away.

He took the spear up in two hands, in a distinctly different style from the spartans, “Well, come on then.”

WIth the shield gone and his switch back to using a spear like he had been trained he defeated the next three challenges with relative impunity. It was only when the king stared adding extra fighters did Adam struggle.

They clashed hard, Adam ducking dodging and sometimes jumping over swings from his opponents. He dived into the dirt, rolled onto his back and caught two spears as they hurtled down at him. He kicked one in the side of the knee and he went down. Adam lunged for the hit, spun on the spot and caught the second spear as it came down for him again. He brought the but of his spear up and hit the woman in the face before spinning back in the other direction, dodging an oncoming jab and slammed his spear into the back of his opponent’s head sending them sprawling to the ground.

He was breathing heavily now but he could see and hear some of the men and women muttering in surprise.

The king nodded, “This is heartening, I must say. It seems as if our leaders CAN fight.”

Someone was motioned forward and he was handed a rag to wipe his face and a canteen of water. He drank greedy wiping his mouth and tossing the leather skin back to the young woman who had brought it to him.

“But I think I do see one deficiency.”

He took a waiting spear from one of his followers, waved off a shield and stepped into the ring.

Men and women all around the circle leaned forward in anticipation. Adam readied himself.

The king stepped forward.

Adam could already tell this wasn;t going to be easy.

He was already tired, the kind was fresh.

But still he was ready, the two men circled and then Adam lunged forward in the way the Drev had taught him, The king batted it away and they made an exchange. The man didn’t try to attack him, but seemed content on seeing what Adam could do. Their engagement must have lasted for thirty minutes as they clashed, the king slowly escalating over that time. The longer they went the more energized the other man became. Adam thought if he could just hold out until the other man grew tired as well, then maybe he would have an upper hand.

But it never happened.

Adam gasped for air.

Even after what must have been thirty minutes of continual engagement, the other man only seemed to be breathing steadier and more deeply. All together they had been fighting longer and harder than all of the other previous engagements put together, and still the man was not tired. Adam watched as the man specifically did not take openings that should have killed Adam.

He knew he was trying to make some sort of point.

Adam was breathing in ragged gasps now. He had never been so tired in all his life, he came in for a lunge he knew was sloppy, and his spear was kicked from his hand. A sandals foot hit him in the chest and he went down choking. The king stood over him nodding, “I am impressed by your skill” He turned and waved to the crowd, “You could match any man or woman here hand to hand in a fair fight, but you do have one deficiency.”

Adam gulped and panted.

The king crouched next to him, “No stamina.”

He stood again, “You train with my men tomorrow, and so does your marine. We will make Spartan’s out of you yet!”

Adam gasped coming to his knees, “Wait… but I-”

“You came here for vacation, and I am sorry to inform you that will not be so. You will not be leaving until I am satisfied our galaxy is in the Best hands.”

Adam stood crawling to his feet with great effort.

The king even smiled at him this time, which seemed strange to him somehow. He held out a hand and Adam took it, “A pleasure to fight with you Admiral, I am James king of the Spartans.”

Adam frowned, “James?’ Not Kyros or something?”

“I was born in the northern provinces of Mericanda, of course I don’t have a greek name.”

He clapped Adam on the shoulder and then walked off joined by his queen and their entourage as he shouted orders vanishing into the night.

Adam stared after him.

So, the king of Sparta was Canadian? 

[pvremichigan]

Have you ever picked up a habit from developing/writing one of your own characters? And if so, who and what?

Who was the first OC you made?

What inspired you to make Mich?

Do you have any voice claims for your OCs?

Are there any other preexisting characters that inspired an OC?

What things in real life make you think of an OC?

Have you ever picked up a habit from developing/writing one of your own characters? And if so, who and what?

Uuuuh so I've gained a lot of shit from Mich. A lot. Not the other way around. Almost as if she projects onto me instead of me to her. One of the big ones is ironically looking at the camera or side glancing. Basically reacting with facial expressions - LMAO THAT'S NORMAL BUT LIKE... HOW DO I PUT IT. Like if someone says something stupid, I "look at the camera" with :| or |:[ or something like that. Basically I'm more expressive with reactions, physically and verbally. I'm not giving it justice, it sounds very normal but I promise I'm trying to explain something that I've inherited from her. Maybe another example won't make me look stupid. No now I can't think of anything, you're just going to have to take th-

HONESTY. BRUTAL HONESTY. NOT EVEN TO BE RUDE, LIKE FULL ON ABOVE AND BEYOND HONESTY WHEN I'M IN THE WRONG OR DOING SOMETHING STUPID. I'm not trying to be quirky, but sometimes I can be like "I'm mad about this and I am in the wrong for being upset but I want to complain about something" like that kind of honesty. Mich does this shit all the time.

Who was the first OC you made?

The first oc I EVER made - we don't talk about her - was Spartan. She was an overpowered godmodded every awful thing in the book oc. Complete and utter mary sue. Creepypasta oc as well. I won't tell her story because you all will laugh at me. Long story short I love redheads but now she has been through an entire redesign and she will instead be a character in the webcomic that I will probably never make.

What inspired you to make Mich?

Mich came to life because I made the mistake of watching Hetalia (forced by @noitzok to sit down and watch it) and had an unending love for my state. The inspiration was the state itself along with my adoration of badass women.

Do you have any voice claims for your OCs?

Voice claims. Wow. Well yes, honestly. Many of them, but not all. I'll even link some of them!

(canon) Mich - She doesn't have a solid vc since there's nothing that really captures her voice but the closest one I found was Femshep, Jennifer Hale in general but FemShep is the closest one.

David: I've been debating. His original vc was iDubbbz (I cannot link the song though because it has very bad content and words in it) but now I'm leaning towards the newer Bo Burnham.

Penny: No specific one but it's a very friendly higher toned Yooper voice for sure.

Carter: The lead singer but just a tiny bit deeper

Musey: Spinel specifically from this song

Xephrel: Used to be Cody Carson, now it's Jschlatt (I won't apologize)

(I cannot find Satoshi's but dw about it)

Now for the verses.

Danganronpa Mich: Jill Valentine from the RE3 Remake

Symbiote Mich: (FemShep but a little deeper and smooth)

Keiran: Chris Redfield from Resident Evil 5

Human Mich: It's between Claire Redfield from the RE2 remake and Erin Lillis

Lovesick Mich: Kirstin

50's Mich: Kay Starr

the others I have not figured out yet.

Are there any other preexisting characters that inspired an OC?

Xephrel's old chaotic ways and voice at the time were inspired by Bill Cypher but other than that? No, not really. Aside from Spartan inspiring Mich's looks in a very faint sense.

What things in real life make you think of an OC?

Anything. Music, art, headcanons, jokes, weather, mood, scents, voices, situations. You fucking name it... At least once did all of these inspire me. Made all my webcomic characters, looks, and backstories based on Monstercat songs. I have playlists for my muses.

[greekbros]

"greek-Bros: Amazons vs Spartans"

*in antiquity, the grand belief that Spartans were the descendants of Heracles and the Amazons were the descendants of Ares were widely accepted ideas*

Ares: *after centuries of basically creating the world's most weaponized feminists* BEHOLD, the Amazons. True warriors of war and bloodshed.

Athena: That's lovely dear brother but are they even educated?

Ares: Badass bitches don't need book smarts to get their point across.

Athena: *almost wanting to put that on a shirt ironically* .....right....

Heracles: *after creating Spartans, he just starts reciting the intro of 300*

Athena: ..........ok.....so...you both created 2 countries with no means of education or culture what's so ever....

Heracles and Ares: *both coming to terms the both of them weaponized feminism and masculinity* yes.

Athena: *face palms* .....is there ANY difference between the two?

Heracles: Woman and Men are equally swol in Sparta and women hold the property rights.

Ares: WUT? WELL MY AMAZONIANS HAVE LAZER VISON, FIGHT CRIME AND THEY CAN TRAVEL TO THE YEAR 1985!

Athena: oh my God it just keeps getting better and better doesn't it....

*somewhere else*

*the Bois are being shown the city of troy by Apollo*

Apollo: These are the Trojans. They're dumb and stupid but I love them dearly.

Dionysus: awwww. ~

Hermes: That's cool I sure do hope nothing bad happens to them.

[aboveallarescuer]

Daenerys Targaryen's tropes - Upbringing Makes the Hero

"Heroes are made, not born" is a common and unstated theme in a lot of works. Though a good many heroic origins proudly trot out heroes who have been raised in The Spartan Way and can look Death in the eye-sockets without blinking before leaving their Tibetan monastery home, quite a few grew up Farm Boys who never picked up anything sharper than a hoe, though those can be quite a handful.

In fact, heroes with a down to earth upbringing tend to have a unique advantage over the more badass and epic ones: they're more centered. While they won't be saints, they'll have a strong enough moral compass to navigate most moral dilemmas, resist The Dark Side, and even refute Hannibal Lectures that more emotionally fragile heroes struggle with. If they gain super powers, they won't forget "the little people" and turn into a Smug Super with delusions of grandeur. Though they didn't gain the crime-fighting prowess of a lifetime of Charles Atlas training, or the street-savvy of an orphan with a Dark and Troubled Past, they also didn't sacrifice basic skills or their social life.

Daenerys's background

A princess, Dany thought. She had forgotten what that was like. Perhaps she had never really known. (AGOT Daenerys I)

~

After Ser Willem had died, the servants had stolen what little money they had left, and soon after they had been put out of the big house. Dany had cried when the red door closed behind them forever.

They had wandered since then, from Braavos to Myr, from Myr to Tyrosh, and on to Qohor and Volantis and Lys, never staying long in any one place. Her brother would not allow it. The Usurper’s hired knives were close behind them, he insisted, though Dany had never seen one.

At first the magisters and archons and merchant princes were pleased to welcome the last Targaryens to their homes and tables, but as the years passed and the Usurper continued to sit upon the Iron Throne, doors closed and their lives grew meaner. Years past they had been forced to sell their last few treasures, and now even the coin they had gotten from Mother’s crown had gone. In the alleys and wine sinks of Pentos, they called her brother “the beggar king.” Dany did not want to know what they called her. (AGOT Daenerys I)

~

“The Milk Men shun him. Khaleesi, do you see the girl in the felt hat? There, behind the fat priest. She is a—”

“—cutpurse,” finished Dany. She was no pampered lady, blind to such things. She had seen cutpurses aplenty in the streets of the Free Cities, during the years she’d spent with her brother, running from the Usurper’s hired knives. (ACOK Daenerys III)

~

“My brother visited Pentos, Myr, Braavos, near all the Free Cities. The magisters and archons fed him wine and promises, but his soul was starved to death. A man cannot sup from the beggar’s bowl all his life and stay a man. I had my taste in Qarth, that was enough. I will not come to Pentos bowl in hand.”

“Better to come a beggar than a slaver,” Arstan said.

“There speaks one who has been neither.” Dany’s nostrils flared. “Do you know what it is like to be sold, squire? I do. My brother sold me to Khal Drogo for the promise of a golden crown. Well, Drogo crowned him in gold, though not as he had wished, and
I ... my sun-and-stars made a queen of me, but if he had been a different man, it might have been much otherwise. Do you think I have forgotten how it felt to be afraid?” (ASOS Daenerys II)

Key examples of Daenerys's mindset and actions as queen that reflect her past experiences

Death followed death. Weak children, wrinkled old women, the sick and the stupid and the heedless, the cruel land claimed them all. Doreah grew gaunt and hollow-eyed, and her soft golden hair turned brittle as straw.

Dany hungered and thirsted with the rest of them. (ACOK Daenerys I)

~

“I was alone for a long time, Jorah. All alone but for my brother. I was such a small scared thing. Viserys should have protected me, but instead he hurt me and scared me worse. He shouldn’t have done that. He wasn’t just my brother, he was my king. Why do the gods make kings and queens, if not to protect the ones who can’t protect themselves?”

“Some kings make themselves. Robert did.”


“He was no true king,” Dany said scornfully. “He did no justice. Justice ... that’s what kings are for.” (ASOS Daenerys III)

~

Dany set great store by Ser Jorah’s counsel, but to leave Meereen untouched was more than she could stomach. She could not forget the children on their posts, the birds tearing at their entrails, their skinny arms pointing up the coast road. “Ser Jorah, you say we have no food left. If I march west, how can I feed my freedmen?”

“You can’t. I am sorry, Khaleesi. They must feed themselves or starve. Many and more will die along the march, yes. That will be hard, but there is no way to save them. We need to put this scorched earth well behind us.”

Dany had left a trail of corpses behind her when she crossed the red waste. It was a sight she never meant to see again. “No,” she said. “I will not march my people off to die.” My children. “There must be some way into this city.” (ASOS Daenerys V)

~

When she looked over one shoulder, there it stood, the afternoon sun blazing off the bronze harpy atop the Great Pyramid. Inside Meereen the slavers would soon be reclining in their fringed tokars to feast on lamb and olives, unborn puppies, honeyed dormice and other such delicacies, whilst outside her children went hungry. A sudden wild anger filled her. I will bring you down, she swore. (ASOS Daenerys V)

~

Her audience chamber was on the level below, an echoing high-ceilinged room with walls of purple marble. It was a chilly place for all its grandeur. There had been a throne there, a fantastic thing of carved and gilded wood in the shape of a savage harpy. She had taken one long look and commanded it be broken up for firewood. “I will not sit in the harpy’s lap,” she told them. Instead she sat upon a simple ebony bench. It served, though she had heard the Meereenese muttering that it did not befit a queen. (ASOS Daenerys VI)

~

Reznak would have summoned another tokar next, but Dany insisted that he call upon a freedman. Thereafter she alternated between the former masters and the former slaves. (ADWD Daenerys I)

~

He was too eloquent for her. Dany had no answer for him, only the raw feeling in her belly. “Slavery is not the same as rain,” she insisted. “I have been rained on and I have been sold. It is not the same. No man wants to be owned.” (ADWD Daenerys III)

~

Her freedmen were represented by the captains of the three companies she had formed—Mollono Yos Dob of the Stalwart Shields, Symon Stripeback of the Free Brothers, Marselen of the Mother’s Men. Reznak mo Reznak hovered at the queen’s elbow, and Strong Belwas stood behind her with his huge arms crossed. Dany would not lack for counsel. (ADWD Daenerys III)

~

When you smashed the slave trade, the blow was felt from Westeros to Asshai. Qarth depends upon its slaves. So too Tolos, New Ghis, Lys, Tyrosh, Volantis … the list is long, my queen.”

“Let them come. In me they shall find a sterner foe than Cleon. I would sooner perish fighting than return my children to bondage.” (ADWD Daenerys IV)

~

“Lingering here will never bring it any closer. The sooner we take our leave of this place—”

“I know. I do.” Dany did not know how to make him see. She wanted Westeros as much as he did, but first she must heal Meereen. (ADWD Daenerys IV)

~

Yesterday a wagon had been overturned and two of her soldiers killed, so today the queen had determined that she would bring the food herself. Every one of her advisors had argued fervently against it, from Reznak and the Shavepate to Ser Barristan, but Daenerys would not be moved. “I will not turn away from them,” she said stubbornly. “A queen must know the sufferings of her people.” (ADWD Daenerys VI)