#sp blindspot

[subconsciousmysteries]

many people who use typology have never engaged with reality and it shows. Let me go through the two main, sadly very common mentalities which expose you as a retard who doesn't understand the real world.

"you cant develop your blindspot." Whether you can or can't develop the ability to properly give a shit about your blindspot... life is going to force you to at least pretend you care about your blindspot and fake it til you make it. otherwise you literally die. People are forced by the world to either enact their blindspot to survive (causing dumb typologers to mistype ppl as their blindspot), or perish. This especially applies if your blindspot is soc or sp. sp-blinds have to pay the bills, clean their rooms and develop a stable routine that nurtures their bodies and souls, despite their apathy towards their financial status and their personal comforts. soc-blinds have to sell a social image of themselves to get a job and then further develop an image as someone reliable if they want to get better pay, despite their apathy towards their social status. there is something in all our lives which demands us to engage our blindspot and if we dont step up, we lose at life.

"Socs are nice and groupthinky and soc blinds are mean and edgy and individualistic" shows me you're sp-blind, probably a 4 and/or 5 fix obsessed with your wet dream of how much more individualistic than thou you are too. if you think soc-blind is about being mean, you don't understand the slightest thing about what an sp-haver and a soc-blind actually thinks. I question if anyone who thinks this way has ever actually tried to provide for themselves in the sp way. sp is about AVOIDING risks and staying stable. To hold down a job and be economically stable in the safest way possible -- what sp is about -- the method is to be to be fucking nice to people and keep your head down so that you aren't deemed Bad For Corporate Image and cut off from your stream of income. to maintain your sp comforts rather than deal with the DANGER (thing sp avoids) of them being threatened, you have to not piss people off. It baffles me that so called sp-havers don't know this and go around assuming that anyone who is kind and bearable must be some sort of soc. the concept of "being nice to avoid conflict and protect myself" is foreign to these so-called sp-havers, which reeks of sp-blindness. Sp-dom is always aware of threats to their sp needs and doesn't want to drag needless conflict into their lives that could risk their financial stability and comfy routines. Sp-doms are those people who fearfully and resentfully keep their social media image as plain and as milquetoast as possible, so that their corporate job doesn't fire them. Yes even sp/sx does this, tho we struggle to tame ourselves more than sp/so because of the explosiveness of sx... we still do it. I have kept my internet rage anonymous for years and am only just decompartmentalizing my life and developing the courage to be myself on the internet with my true face because I feared losing my job over it, for years. Sp is about this soulless pragmatism. It is aligned with type 6 (soc is aligned with type 3 and sx is aligned with type 9), so even if you're not a 6 or 6 fix, having sp will add 6-like traits to you. the wimpiness and cowardice of sp (gotta keep my head down so my employers keep paying me!) applies to ppl even if they are assertive types... The only conflict sp-doms will engage in is around their resources, and in modern society the best way to get resources is almost never conflict, it is through (unfortunately) keeping your head down and shutting up so that you are hireable. almost ALL sp-doms know this. so they train themselves to be nice, and will seldom be cunts. because it is most safe + profitable to be nice. it is low risk to be nice. so sp-doms like being nice. yes we will be grumpy and low energy if you fuck with our routines and other sp things. but we are fundamentally NOT edgy (at least compared to our sx and soc siblings of the same enneatype) because starting conflict is risky and thats the antithesis of sp. Soc is the instinct about status and showing off and shining your image to the world. Socs all have 3-like traits even if they don't have any 3 in their enneatype. they are the ones who enjoy engaging in social drama and being socially mean and petty, because this is an avenue to attain status and peacock your social role in the community and define who you are to others. This trait can be used for better or worse.

[fanopeia]

em: Instinctual Variants Stackings | Wiki | Myers Briggs [MBTI] Amino (aminoapps.com)

Self-Preservation dominant, Sexual 2nd, Social blindspot (SP/SX)

> Mindset: "I can have merging/intensity without having to leave my orderly & pleasing lifestyle." (imagination, safe people and relationships, when the safety of these are challenged they withdraw)

> Earthy, mysterious, quietly intense, seem oblivious to the greater social world around them, favour personal interests

> Slow to commit, but when they do it is a life commitment to establish an impermeable bond

> Can attach to others at a root level in contrast to their surface formality

> Sanctuary of home, decorate spaces to reflect their taste/depth

> Want to live in secure comfortable environment where they can pursue their private interests in depth

> Archetypes: The Grave Digger, pirate, voodoo fetishist

> Missing Social, fresh air/sunlight

> Shrouded/hooded quality, cave dweller

> Can be oblivious to the collective good

> Communications are intimate, personal, no aura of the collective

> Friend-of-the-dark, non-judgemental with people’s underbellies/corruption

> The elements as metaphor: Downward death, decay/destruction, undertow, carcasses recycling into earth fertilizing

> Molten fire SX in earth’s core SP, volcanic, threat of eruption

> Psychic nudity/revelation threatens the SP/SX with self-destruction, or at least social self-destruction, which is all part of the distilling process toward the desired one-to-one bond.

​-------------------------------------------------------------

Sexual dominant, Self-Preservation 2nd, Social blindspot (SX/SP)

> Mindset: "If I can make (us) have an orderly & pleasing lifestyle, I can keep up and escalate all this merging/intensity."

> Internally conflicted, inconsistent behaviour SX blocked by SP, brooding, troubledIsolation vs. emerging

> Strictly personal outlook, not concerned with social consensus

> Searching for missing piece, soulmate, form a secret bond

> When stressed, severe sexual tensions may manifest as erratic behaviour

> Restless, torn between stable home and urge to wander/explore intensity

> Want the intensity of partner/pursuing personal interests with the stability and comfort of a home sanctuary

> Archetypes: The Alchemist, shaman, self-injurer, cutter, tattoo artist

> Missing Social, fresh air/sunlight, when you take away air you get death

> Shrouded/hooded quality, cave dweller

> Oblivious to the collective good

> Communications are intimate, personal, no aura of the collective

> Friend-of-the-dark, non-judgemental with people’s underbellies/corruption

> The elements as metaphor: Upward death, rebirth, metamorphosis, burned to death and born again from new elements

> Losing self to die in the other in upward peak of flame and ecstasy

> A lightning bolt captured in a bottle. The energy is always there but it's contained in a glass jar and only breaks free once in a while. The SX/SP is boxed in energy, self-contained, cutting, and focused. SX/SP types will often look angry even when they are not. There is a certain reality of emotion which they display that is due to their social obliviousness. Most SX's will be honest almost to a fault. SX/SP want to choose their friends wisely. A "with me or against me" attitude reminiscent of 6 and 8s. The least inhibited of all stackings. Cares less of what others think of them. The most likely to get into physical altercations, and may even enjoy fighting. Healthy SX/SP's will display a playful selfishness.

> SX/SP have a inner confidence which is not usually found in other stackings. However they may lack social confidence or just may not pay any attention to social rituals at all. Put a SX/SP in a busy bar and they will be confident in themselves. But make them sit at their parent-in-laws for a formal family dinner and you won't see that same confidence. It's inner confidence rather than social confidence of the SX/SO. May be very popular without knowing or putting emphasis on it, unlike SO types.

> SX/SP does create a kind of isolationary tendency though even in extroverted types, an in-their-own-world vibe, kinda oblivious sometimes. But ironically they can also be extremely insistent and aggressive on issues they feel strongly about, which they go on about in the SO realms in ways that will cause stronger SO's to cringe, it's so rough and undiplomatic. They can fall in love with their soapboxes. They can tune out of conversations, reacting suddenly when someone says something interesting, then snapping back to their inner focus whenever it gets boring. Also, making the odd crude joke, in bad taste. Or a faux pas, where they don't know it's the wrong thing to say until afterwards, or don't care.

> SX manifests as strong drives towards pleasure, new experiences, personal transformations, spontaneity, being provocative and in the spotlight, flaunting to impress, extravagance, and unrealistic romantic fantasies and whims. But SP counters with worries, fears, practical downers, erecting walls, a need to hide and be secretive, and needs to conserve time, space, and energy.

Energies in the Stackings

SX-firsts, aren’t as aware of the interactions between them and others and the environment, rather… their more aware of the chemistry. So while the so-firsts are more “mechanical”, the sx-firsts are more “chemical”. Focusing on SX-first issues involve: Am I close to my gf/bf? Am I close to my family? How much in common do we all have? Do I really like this thing? Am I attracted to it? Is that person attracted to that other person? etc. They’re more aware of the bonds and the chemistry between them and people, as well as environment, and other people and other people, as well as other people and the environment. They really like being close to their intimates, and are generally passionate about things. Likewise, they fear that those chemical bonds could be broken, and when they are, they are emotionally hurt. They feel literally separated, and ripped away from the other person or object.

SP-first issues revolve around: Am I healthy? Do I look good? How are my financial issues? How is that person’s financial issues? Am I hungry? etc. In other words, SP-firsts worry more about fitness. Fitness in general, of course, not necessarily just body fitness. Therefore, they worry more about how fit they are in their environment, as well as how fit other people are in their environment. They want to be fit. This represents more a potential energy, rather than mechanical and chemical energy. When someone leaves them… I guess perhaps they feel more unfit, since I’m sure they may rely on others to keep them fit. Though, its still more important for they themselves to be fit on their own.

[ok, não sei ainda qual sequência é mais minha cara. ainda acho que sx/sp]

[twoplustwoequalsfuckyou]

Blindspots as Rachel Bloom songs

social-blind

self-preservation-blind

sexual-blind

if you're soc-blind or sp-blind and dont relate to your song reconsider your typing <3

[kendrixtermina]

Miscellaneous insights from the Hudson Instincts writeup

Welcome to today's episode of 'I read enneagram texts so you don't have to'

The complexes of the blindspots

Based on surveilling a large number of students, Mr. Hudson seems to have found out a tendency for ppl with each blindspot to consistently tend towards specific kinds of complexes. This could be useful as a 'diagnostic criterion'

sp blind complex: "I am a flake. I do not have it together & I never will. I am not sure how to be an adult & I feel like an eternal kid. I don't know how the world works & I am not sure how to establish myself in life"

sx blind complex: "I am hopelessly boring. I can't imagine anyone taking much interest in me, & if they do I suspect there is something wrong with them. Thank God I can be useful because few would be interested in me otherwise"

so blind complex: "There is something deeply defective & shameful about me--especially about my emotions. I feel like I SHOULD care about people, but to be honest, often I don't. I am scared people will see my shortcomings."

Perhaps you had previously chalked this up to your core type somehow, and indeed I wouldn't be surprised if most 'hear' this filtered through the corresponding deficiency statements.

The concrete physical sensations connected to the instincts

(for this segment im also adding in some things in here that I got from the bhe podcast or seeing various youtube interviews)

sp -> this is the simplest, actual sensationsof being hungry, tired, hot/cold, comfortable etc. You know how some people just completely forget about that?

sx -> tingly sensations of excitement, of being energized, anticipating gratification, thrills etc.

so -> sense of being tense or relaxed or otherwise feeling a kinda way around particular people. So having ppl, even the more reclusive ones, also report missing a certain something if they can't interact face to face for a while.

It's important to know that we all experience all of these, what differs is the degree to which we pay attention - I can think of one sx blind individual who reported that typical problem of the date staying at a friendship get to know level & her not being able to tell easily or quickly if it 'clicked' attention wise, but she still noticeably sounded more gushy/excited about some dates way more than others.

As for social instinct... I know of one person who lost a whole lot of weight without diet or exercise just from moving out from under her parents' roof - it was all stress chubb. So, its clear that what people you're around certainly affects you physiologically somehow Synchronized periods could also be an example of this.

The types' approach to instinctual resources

What I found interesting & potentially illustrative to understanding the is how he sort of summarized each types' general approach to resources that is in common no matter what those happen to be.

1: "X is not being done correctly (and im salty about it)!"

2: "I don't need X, but you do, so let me do this for you..."

3: "My value comes from excelling at X"

4: sensitivity & particularity - "There's a problem with my X/ X is not getting me... "

5: Minimization, containment and ambivalence. "I don't want to need too much X, but... "

6: "I am concerned and worried about my X"

7: "You can never have too much X"

8: "I need to be in control of the X" (usual caveat that this isnt necessarily about telling others what to do, but about making sure you have some 'leverage' so your need for X isnt used against you)

9: "I can't have the X I really want, but this will do..."

[mejomonster]

Silent Reading. Chapter 60. Sp much I love about all this. 1. Lang Qiaos pov and thinking fei du will eat Luo wenzhou alive (sexily), 2. Luo wenzhous "type" But Not fei du because he's manipulative and one constantly has to have their nerves alert - which honestly I wonder if that's how Luo wenzhou felt raising him? Like he had to be constantly vigilant to temper fei dus darker impulses and crime leaning thoughts and keep him in line, retort his arguments, keep an eye on him. It's not a totally wrong interpretation, he's right fei du is like that. But also luo wenzhou... of all the people in the world? You've already decided to put in that effort for YEARS to know him in the first place. It'll he fascinating to see that opinion possibly shift. Or mesh with a deeper relationship than just the sort of caretaker/kid one they had into something on more equal footing. 3. awww Luo wenzhou kept a constant eye on him growing up again trying to be so involved, until fei du became a partying playboy lmao. (I wonder if Luo wenzhou - and Tao ran - since they influenced fei du in many ways, figured he'd be a good young man... then he started clubbing and partying and flirting around and they were like ???? Why??? Is our boy like this??? I do wonder if partly it's why Luo wenzhous as bitter about it mentally as he is. He thought he raised fei du better than this lmao). 4. Fei du is working for bureau and hasn't told him yet lol fei du LOVES playing with his food 5. The clothing changeeee. 6. Fei dus secret look at him that lang qiao caught last chapter.... fei du are you seriously... by chance pursuing Luo wenzhou now or soon? I know you're thinking he had a point career wise, clean up wise, hence you are at least on some level doing those things and on some level hoping he'll admit he's impressed/happy to see it. 7. The bit about being too close to fei du is like having too many eyes all on you was described so vividly. 8. Fei du is SO smooth trying to transition to getting that man in his car lol. 9. As a lover of slow burns I love Luo wenzhou feeling it'd been ages since he saw him, missing him more than he used To. How subtly they're both crushing more and both hardly acknowledging it.

Quote:

She rolled her eyes and straightened out her heel with difficulty, firmly biting back the warning she’d been about to give him. She thought, Well, it’s his funeral.

Formerly, Fei Du had worked during the day and fooled around at night. He’d come to harass Tao Ran from time to time, but mostly only to present some new toy as a gift. He hadn’t reported to the public security bureau every day for no reason. Luo Wenzhou had frequently worried about him before, although that had been while he’d still been little; since Fei Du had grown into a 360 degree scoundrel without a blindspot, there’d been nothing worth worrying about.

The city was always active, and everyone was running around toiling; there was also the rush of traffic and the sea of people to separate them. It wasn’t unusual for ordinary friends not to see each other for a few months.

But not much more than a month after the last time President Fei had come running to the City Bureau to “send some comfort,” Luo Wenzhou suddenly had a strange feeling, as if he hadn’t seen him in a very long time.

Fei Du’s car was as flashy as before, but he himself seemed much more in line with conventional norms.

He wasn’t wearing glasses. There was an earpiece hanging loosely from one of his ears. His cotton shirt had for once been buttoned up to just below the top collar button, and, in an extremely rare occurrence, he was wearing jeans. His hair had been casually pushed back, displaying his clear, handsome brow. It was as if something had washed his whole soul clean. All traces of that air of the scum of the literati were gone. At a glance, he looked like a slightly rebellious but not over-the-line arts student.

Hands in his pockets, Luo Wenzhou strolled over in front of Fei Du, internally cursing in spite of himself—

There were innumerable types of male beauty in the world, and Luo Wenzhou was interested in a fairly broad range of them. He could appreciate the Western aesthetic, full to bursting with masculine hormones and brimming with force; he could also appreciate the traditional aesthetic, clear as the moon, gentle as jade…as long as they didn’t display Fei Du’s revolting behavior, he wouldn’t turn any of them down.

President Fei was of the type he found most unendurable, simply a cobra in human shape. He was immaculately groomed; it was impossible to tell whether he was telling the truth or shamming; he had so many eyes trained on the world that getting close to him could make you feel a touch of trypophobia. There was a sharp and intense feeling of invasiveness about him; if you didn’t want to be manipulated by him, you would have to keep your nerves subconsciously strained. Never mind appreciation, Luo Wenzhou’s head hurt at the thought of him.

But the style he was attracted to at first sight was a clean and straightforward, somewhat distinctive one; add in some good looks, and it basically hit him dead-center in his most vulnerable point—for example, the way Fei Du looked right now.

Fei Du was young, after all. When he retracted his venomous fangs, he could conjure up a look of brimming youthfulness, mixing the true with the false.

Luo Wenzhou waved a hand, dismissing the little traffic cop from the department next door. He patted the roof of Fei Du’s car and pointed to the commercial building across the street. “Turn right and there’s a shopping center, didn’t you see? That’s where the nearest parking lot is. Outside of special circumstances, the public’s cars can’t randomly park at a public security bureau’s gates. You need a parking permit.”

Fei Du gave him a wholly unclouded smile. “How do I get a parking permit?”

“We don’t sell long-term parking permits wholesale or retail. First, you have to be City Bureau personnel. If you can’t manage that, you have to be the family member of City Bureau personnel.” Luo Wenzhou, not turning a hair, lowered his eyes, giving his stimulated eyeballs a break. “You want a parking permit just for opening your mouth. Do you have the status, President Fei? A few days after getting your cast taken off, you’re driving around raising hell all over the place—what are you doing here now?”

Without answering, Fei Du asked, “You didn’t drive today?”

“I lent my car to a colleague to use to go on a date,” said Luo Wenzhou.

Fei Du narrowed his eyes and opened the car door. “Perfect. Do you want to get in?”

Luo Wenzhou: “…”

This movement of Fei Du’s stirred up a light wind. Luo Wenzhou found to his surprise that he hadn’t sprayed on any cologne today; the smell that came from him was a mixture of the detergent from his shirt and some shaving lotion. It was clear and clean, like an autumn breeze washed by cool rain.

This joker had to be doing it on purpose.

Luo Wenzhou’s mind was alert, but his limbs rebelled against his brain, taking the initiative to get into the car.

[evangeliumtypologicum]

Dlaczego instynkt seksualny i seks łączą się nazwowo?

Nie tylko że potencjalnie jedno prowadzi do drugiego, czy że jedno może być celem druegio. Nie tylko że oba dotyczą chemii ciał.

Wydaje się, że seks z perspektywy kolektywnego Blindspot SX wydaje się idealnym sposobem, bezpiecznym kontekstem (najbezpieczniejszym) na realizację instynktu seksualnego. Tracenie siebie w sposób inny niż społecznie dozwolony.

SX nakierowany na systemy polityczne czy społeczne wydaje się groźniejszy

SX nakierowany na warunkowe użycie (pod warunkiem spełnienia i sp i so dla SX blibdow ) wydaje się bezpieczniejsza opcja.

-------+

Generalnie ideologia enneagramers z gloryfikacja seksualnego jest ok, ale tylko do momentu aż to zintegrujezmsz i pójdziesz dalej, potem już tracisz czas.

Gloryfikowanie zbyt długo i 4 i SX i robienie z tego jakiegoś super epitalryzmu to raczej sprzeczna droga do uzywania enneageamu w taki sposób, do jakiego został wymyślony/odkryty

[mbtistufff]

may i ask you to help me with iv? i used to be very stereotypically so blind as a child but finding an accepting community made me enjoy the thought of connecting to people and participating in society. at the same time i'm not sure if being social'd worth it so i don't act on it much yet. and i'm sure i've sx so not so/sp thing. how to determine if i was an unhealthy sock or if i'm compensating for the so blindspot atm? and i generally look like being both sp and so blind simultaneously

It might help to look at the reasons you are struggling with both so and sp things. Our primary instincts consume us an individuals, to the point where they can actually become an unhealthy fixation. Whereas our blindspots are something we struggle with simply because they aren't a priority to us.

Consider if you're struggling with being social because you feel insecure in groups and avoid them out of a deep desire to belong and fear of rejection (an example of an unhealthy social dominant), or if you struggle with being social simply because it's not a priority for you (social blind)?

Similarly, do you think you're struggling with sp things because you worry about your physical needs and fear being without them, which can therefore ironically lead you to neglect them (an expression of unhealthy sp dominance), or simply because taking care of physical sp needs like food, shelter, money, and self-care just isn't a priority for you (sp blindness)?

If either one is your second instinct it may not be something you use all the time because it's not your first priority. You may neglect it for awhile, but when you do use it, it's not a struggle for you. Rather your second instinct will feel natural and comfortable for you. It's often the area where people feel most comfortable "playing" and being creative because it generally doesn't cause them issues or unhealthy fixations.

Hope this helps.

[dehya-selei]

so/sp & sx/so blindspot conflict

It’s strange to be sandwiched in a personal conflict between sx/so and so/sp. It seems sx at times can not understand why sp cannot deal with having them around indefinitely. Sx/so feels offended, hurt and angry. So/sp sets boundaries due to stress, and perceived increased need for maintenance and upkeep. Being sp/sx I can understand them both, yet am baffled that it’s so hard for them to “get” each other. Guess this is what happens when each person has the other’s blindspot in their stacking. On sidenote sp/so (E2 -> 8) and sx/so (E8 -> 5) are the greatest tag team for dealing with an annoying neighbor. Nobody wants to be on the other end of that disintegration stick. Though that might also be because of the E8 fix/combo.

[subconsciousmysteries]

when russ hudson said that sp-blinds worry about sp and neuroticize about being unable to take of themselves, nobody felt that. except idiots

[counterphobes]

Spsx real/fictional examples (part 1?)

Peter Steele

Rust (True Detective)

Darlene (Ozark)

Sandor Clegan (Game of Thrones, even though the spso actor doesn't bring it out as well as the others)

Lisbeth (The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo specifically the 2009 version with Noomi Rapace)

Kanye West

Their look makes you shiver, its like they're planning to kill you even though they're just chilling. Uncomfortable, tired, serious, focused eyes that seem as if their soul is being drained right out of them (contraflow energy)

[mbtistufff]

Sp- blind #1

When I was a child a lady from my church was diagnosed with cancer and my youth group volunteered to help her cook and clean.  One Saturday when we were volunteering she asked me to walk her dog.  I said yes and proceeded to walk her dog through some really sketchy neighborhoods, completely oblivious to any possible danger.  I ended up getting lost with the dog and almost got attacked by a pitbull.  Once I found my way back my mom and the woman with cancer were crying because they thought something terrible happened to me, to which I responded, “I don’t know why you’re so worried.”  The next week another girl my same age was walking through that neighborhood in broad daylight and got kidnapped.    

[funkymbtifiction]

Hey Charity! You used to think you were a Sx blind then Sp blind and now a Sx blind, so, could you help please to differenciate between the two perceptions? I am So first, but can't decide if I use closeness "merging" with individual people or self care to fullfill So's need (I can see arguments for both in me :/ ). How did you figure it out? What behaviors/thought pattern you saw in yourself/somene can see in themselves to determine it? Thank you!

Mostly it’s because I know myself. I know sp-blinds and the things they never even think about astound me, because prioritizing health, energy, finances, safety, and rest comes second nature to me.

I know: how much sleep I need and make sure I get it; how long I can work before I go beyond my optimal productivity; how long I can be around people before they tire me; what temperature to keep my room so I can sleep at night; not to go without a coat in the winter; to save half of every paycheck; to avoid crowds (they drain me); to avoid headaches, I must stay hydrated and out of the sun; to avoid low blood sugar, I must eat every day at the same time; to feel my best, I need 8 hours of sleep a night, so I go to bed at the same time; in case I need something fast, I need to know where the resources are, so I look around in new places to locate the amenities.

Even if I am having a lot of fun with my friends, I will leave when I feel my energy wane and I know it’s time to go home so I can be fully productive the next day. I have one eye at all times on so concerns (community) and personal needs (sp) so I make decisions based on how much time, energy, resources, and money it will cost. I know exactly when I need to leave someplace or a friend to fill all my sp-needs before going back to work the next morning.

I have in the past struggled to know how to do all of these things, because I’m an inferior Si, but I was very much aware of my need for them and wanted to do them. And like Claire in the above gif, I have always prioritized ‘me’ time. Even if I really like someone and am drawn to them, I still know when I need to be alone and recharge. I am very so/sp in my interactive style – friendly but reserved. I show up, talk to them, have fun, and go home when I’ve had enough – alone. This frustrates them when they want ‘more’ of me, but I have boundaries. I know when enough is enough and when something would be too much for me.

I realize friendships are fleeting and people grow apart as their lives change but I approach new situations based on whether I like this person enough to give up my sp resources (time, energy, focus, attention, money) to include them in my life. And even then, my focus is still so/sp – the desire to make friends with them, and introduce them to other people in my social circle. There’s not a ton of ‘exclusivity’ in my thinking like an sx, and when my attention wanes, I don’t just dump the person or thing in search of the next high. With people, I either maintain the friendship on an so-basis or let it wane; projects, if it’s a useful resource to others (so) I find someone to take it over from me.

Another thing I’ve noticed that distinguishes me from my so/sx friend is she sees dating as an amazingly fun experience, because you’re trying out all these different people (so) to find ‘the one’ you just have crazy chemistry with (sx).

I find dating excruciating. It’s really difficult for me to balance staying connected to all my friends (so) with the need for a lot of down time to take care of my sp needs and my work responsibilities, plus I’m not looking for an intense or instant connection, I am weighing so/sp concerns about long-term compatibility and whether they are sending me a vibe like they would want to monopolize all my time and attention – taxing my sp in the process. Most men don’t want to move slow and get to know me gradually so my sp feels threatened by their intense focus. It reaches a point where I feel exhausted, so I quit.

I realize being a 6-1 factors into it, but here’s my thought process on things:

Friend: A bunch of us are going to Disney World in Jan, you want to come??

Me: Can I think about it?

I go home and think like this: how much would it cost and how does that stack up against how much pleasure I might get from it? I’m not a fan of theme parks or interested in rides, but I also want to maintain my so-connection to this group of friends. The price tag is high, especially for something I don’t care about and would be doing just to keep my friend happy with me. It would also be a lot of walking and waiting and standing in the hot sun (I have passed out in similar circumstances before due to getting too hot) and a huge crowd, which would drain me rather quickly. I don’t sleep well in strange beds, so I’d be running on less hours of sleep and around people constantly, unless I spend extra $$ for my own room. Meaning I’d get tired sooner with each subsequent day, opening myself up to getting sick. I’d also have to be careful not to get dehydrated since I would loathe drinking enough water to keep hydrated, since it would mean standing in bathroom lines all day long. Public restrooms – yuck.

So, no. I’d rather save my money and go to NYC, which I love. See a show. Go to the MET again and study the paintings. Walk around Central Park. No screaming, crying children waiting with me in long lines. Just the best pizza in the world and Broadway shows. To maintain so-connections, I’ll wish them well but say I’m saving up to go to NYC with them.. and float the idea to my other friends, see if a few of them want to drive up and do it with us. ;)

- ENFP Mod

ETA: Intense friendships.

I wanted to add this on, since I have had intense friendships before that superficially might look like sx, because they were very close and I neglected other friendships for them. I was even willing to put aside my usual routines to stay up late all night talking to them. But how I got into them was still so/sp focused -- not sx-based at all. The most memorable case was someone came into my social circle, I treated her like everyone else for awhile (friendly, social, interested), but then she stood up for me and defended me against lies when others did not, so my sp trusted her completely. Once we got through that (sp needing boundaries), I was free to be open, intimate, and exclusive with her. So for those of you wondering if so/sp means you’ll never have an “exclusive” friendship or romance -- that’s not the case. It’s just you will build it with so/sp rather than sx.

[ihavenopersonalityuwu]

God xsfp 6w7s are really something

[ambiguous-fixer]

Sp - blind over focus?

Being shocked by the price of daily use items (because I don't handle that stuff) and googling "components of tooth paste" in an attempt to make my own, inexpensive one (for sensitive teeth).

[dasaene-archive]

Hot take on sosp: the reason sosps are so awful is because they social climb under the impression that achieving a higher social position will give them more social security - the issue with this being that the very act of social climbing jeopardises your soc security given that you’re ostracising yourself from a secure group of people who accept you to try your luck attempting to impress a bunch of people who could easily reject you (and probably will given that lacking sx makes you bad at it)

I raise you another hot take that takes into account yours: secondary sp in so/sps is the reason why so/sps are “awful.” In so/sx, sp-blindness makes them not have the awkward limiting factor of sp despite having a lot of the same tendencies as so/sps. So-doms expect so much from themselves to be a major part of the Social Scene and Make Lots of Friends, and the only way to even vaguely accomplish that Sisyphean task is to have no sp to halt your progress.I can’t remember where I heard this, but so/sxs were described as having an “trial version of sx,” which means they have just enough to accomplish so-dom goals properly, meanwhile most so/sps flounder bc their secondary sp gets in the way. So/sps don’t even realize they have an sp wall up half the time, and that hinders them from effectively accomplishing so-dom tasks like their synflow counterpart.

[teapotoracles-blog]

✨and here it is your teapot message ✨ . ☀️The sun ( reversed): you have so many beautiful and valuable things around you but you keep focusing on the things that brings you down. Open your eyes and count your blessings. you have more than you think. . 🛷The chariot: this week is getting pretty busy! You got this! Take a deep breath get focused, organized, and most of all determine. This way you’ll reach your goal with great success ! . 👹The devil: this week your ego tends to get massive. When you find your self in a situation like that, just be aware of your defensive mechanism. Just be aware... The moment you get mindful you take the chance to escape from your little devil and take control of the situation. . . . #tarotreadings #teapot #blindspot #teapotoracles #weeklymessage #tarotreadersofinstagram #thesun #thedevil #thechariot #majorarcana #sp aceodetty https://www.instagram.com/p/BoHhPaFn5WY/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=1mdpv55lf4btt