#sorry. its the law. everyone elses feelings are more justified and important and i have no excuse for not being able to pick up the slack

[corvidcall]

ive been feeling Pretty Bad lately, and imo the worst part of it is that shannon is also Feeling Bad, so we can't really do much for each other. and that seems really unfair imo. at least ONE of us should be functional!!!

[starguardianniom]

All so true, but wait, there's more!

Let's have the protagonist be the center of everything and the best at everything, except at being the heroine of her own story.

Because let's be real here, there ain't much linking Marinette to the actual plot apart from her being Ladybug, and even then she doesn't spend half her time trying to figure out who Hawk Moth is, when she does, she immediatly drops it at the end of the episode and just goes back to waiting for the next akuma, unless Hawk Moth dares to bother showing up in person, otherwise she's a complete sitting duck waiting for the next catastrophe to rear its ugly head, she literally has zero lead on who Hawk Moth could be, and the one time she might have, she quickly dropped it because she fell for a basic ruse, I mean it's awfully convenient that Adrien's father is getting akumatized over a book speaking of the miraculouses that's been lost at the same time as the Butterfly and the Peacock, must be a complete coincidence, right? Just because he has the book doesn't mean he also has one of the miraculouses, right? Please, girl, use your brain more.

Adrien is pretty much linked to everything, is dad is Hawk moth, his dad's assistant is Mayura, the whole reason the show is around is because his mother used the damaged peacock miraculous to make him come to existance, the price being her health later on, to the point it drove his father to villainy trying to save her. And when his dad starts his career as a super villain, Adrien gets chosen to be the hero Chat Noir to oppose him. He's tied to the plot from beginning to the end.

Meanwhile Marinette has literally zero connection to them, sure she's Adrien's classmate and has a crush on him, but that doesn't connect her to the plot because she's too shy or busy running away from Adrien the moment she's embarassed too much. Heck in the Origin episode she literally didn't know who Adrien freaking was.

So zero connection there.

She's a complete random citizen who got voted for the role of hero for one selfless deed that she did, and then she somehow became the goddess of the world and the law itself, as apparently anything she does or say will be forgiven and justified by everyone who ain't her enemy to be allowed to continue her extremely selfish, immoral, lying, manipulative actions during the course of the show.

Marinette is the only one allowed to be mean, she's the only one who's feelings matter, she's the only one who can lie to everyone without being called out on it later on, she's the only one who can get some goddamn privacy, she's the only one who can make people upset enough to become akumatized and be forgiven after what because she had "good intentions" (or not depending which episode we're watching) or realised her mistake and went on to fix it and apologize for it, and then redo the exact same thing in a later episode because god forbid if Marinette ever learns any lesson about her bad habits of lying, running away, being mean, stealing, stalking, breaking property, ect and just in general being around 90% of the time because Adrien is there too.

She ain't a protagonist, she's a plot device and Adrien's satellite in his orbit.

Seriously how many episodes are actually consacred about her without Adrien being involved in some way or another? Not that much. The story will make sure that either she, someone else or just the universe will make it so she gets where Adrien is pretty much for most of the show and pretty much all her friends support it and do their best to make it happen.

She is forced through the plot, but actually ain't connected to it as much as thrown at it and bouncing back.

Even when she becomes Adrien's girlfriend, the show still ain't about her, it's about Adrien's family, while she in the picture is about as important as Zoé is (sorry Zoé I love you but dang did they not handle you gracefully or with dignity much), which is a random civilian completely in the dark about what the hell is going on or why is everything happening.

The only thing she does in the show is making things worse in the long run and oogling so much spotlight that we wonder why there are still other characters in the show outside of her and the villains, who quite frankly have more things to say by themselves that she had in the span of the entire show.

I mean, Gabriel rose from nothing, Émilie and Amélie are royalty, Nathalie seems to have had an interesting past, Felix is a super genius sentibeing who was treated like a monster by his father, Adrien grew up isolated and gets to learn what's it's like to be a normal teenager and going to school, it would have been interesting to see his point of view how different the school and being homeschooled is, and also how he was a model that young.

Marinette is your average kid who's insecure, gets picked on by the local bully but knows how life works at school, she likes fashion and her parents owns a bakery, but apart from that, she doesn't stand out from the rest of the class, who all seems more interesting than her to be honest.

I mean you could have pretty much picked almost anyone else in the class and the story would probably be the same, except we wouldn't see 99% of the time a ridiculous love square and crazy schemes and honestly with how that ended I kind of wish we didn't see it.

Ladybug Vs Avatar's use of the supporting cast and the problem thereof.

I'm not sure if this has been covered before, but there's a serious problem with Marinette being the be-all end-all of everything in Miaculous.

And it's not just because "she's stressed" or "it's all on her". Her being the most important, talented and plot-relevant character in every situation is.

Let's make a comparison to the Gold Standard:

In Avatar the Last Airbender, Aang is the axis of the story. He holds incredible powers beyond anyone else, can bend every element and could conceivably end the entire conflict that plagues his world with relative ease- which he eventually does.

However, for 99% of the story he cannot do so. Because Aang is untrained, he cannot access that divine win-button of the Avatar State at will, and using it carried enormous risks to himself and those around him- making it functionally unusable for common conflicts. Furthermore while he does technically have the capacity to use all four elements, he had only mastered one and needed to learn the remaining three.

Indeed, Aang has outright difficulty with learning Earthbending despite his innate talents and while he's a quick study for the other two, he doesn't demonstrate the same effectiveness with water and fire as Katara and Zuko.

This means that Aang cannot do certain things as well as the others in his team. This means that for the majority of the story, even though his first and preferred element provides him with useful abilities" Aang has weaknesses that he needs others to cover and provide for.

Enter Katara, Sokka, Toph and Zuko.

Katara is a waterbender who teaches Aang and later advances her powers to include the all-important power of healing and the disturbingly effective (though situational) Bloodbending.

Toph is an earthbender who is also one of Aang's teachers, and whose tremor sense later allows her to both detect liars and invent Metalbending.

Sokka is seemingly just the comic relief normie. However his technical mindset allows him to serve as the general of the group, and even plan and lead in that role for entire armies later in the show.

Even Zuko who joins later and becomes less a teacher but a fellow student alongside Aaang in firebending is a skilled infiltrator and melee weapon expert. (This is less of a case than the others since it's not used as much, but it's more of a concrete example than his insights into the fire nation and his potential utility as a replacement Fire Lord).

They each provide far more than those short summaries, but it's important to note that in each case, even when Aang does learn the elements and starts growing into his role as the Avatar: he never gains the full range of abilities that his team offers. He never assumes the fully strategic mindset of Sokka, and even though it's downright implausible that no Avatar before him never learnt healing, he never demonstrates that ability or any Metalbending prowess even in the Avatar state.

There's also the enemy trio of Azula, Ty Lee and Mai. Azula is a powerful firebending genius, but Mai's prowess with her throwing weapons are a close match- and Ty Lee's chi-blocking can outright cripple enemy benders for any given fight when combined with her insane agility: something that not even Azula can do with her firebending. They are an incredibly dangerous combination and when Azula loses them, she becomes far less effective for their absence.

In both teams despite the leader being a powerful, talented bender who is objectively the strongst person on their respective side: there's no doubt about each member of the team contributing something that said leader cannot.

-

Now let's look at Miraculous:

Marinette is the "Greatest Ladybug" of all time despite being fourteen, only having had the earrings for less than a year, and having a list of predecessors that go back literally thousands of years and include Joan of Arc.

She is also the Guardian of the Miracle Box. Specifically she is the Guardian of The Mother Box that is the most important of all the boxes, despite there being at least a full Temple's worth of actually trained candidates somewhere in Tibet who should be far and above more capable than her or her mentor Fu. However, her supposed superior Su-Han seems entirely convinced that she's already surpassed any teachings his order has by how often she breaks said teachings in his face only for him to roll over like a dog. There's not been a single time when Marinette has been confronted by some shortcoming in her responsibilities as a Guardian where she has had to learn anything from the multi-millennia old Order of Gurdians.

Marinette has also worn almost every single Miraculous in her Box at the same time, a feat that supposedly risked serious harm to her but merely made her woozy for an afternoon (if that). As of the season five Finale, she has also unified her earrings with her partner's ring: a scenario that in earlier seasons seemed to imply great risk: yet she was able to use the powers flawlessly.

As Ladybug, she is also the lone hero who has unlocked any new advanced powers with her Miraculous (unless you also include the arbitrary "adulthood" that she and Chat Noir achieved that allows them multiple uses of their Miraculous before detransforming), and on the occasions when she's used anyone else's powers has shown no sign of being any less capable than they are with them.

Ladybug does everything as well if not better than everyone else.

Marinette can not only unify with any Miraculous she needs for a given mission, she can use the powers as effectively as their "dedicated holder" can and without any restrictions. Unlike the majority of the cast who are still under the child-power limit. She can even unify with multiple miraculous at the same time without any drawbacks.

And without those drawbacks, without anyone on the cast being able to use the power of their Miraculous more effectively than Marinette: everyone else on the team is more or less superfluous.

Sure, Marinette has tossed out the Miraculous to her team like candy now. But when you get down to it: the real lesson that she should have learnt from Strikeback to just put some damn security on her Yo-yo/The Box. Because this just means that she has to wait for the hero in question to show up when she could have just pulled off whatever plan she has in mind herself.

And that superfluous label includes Chat Noir.

As frustrating as it is to come to the this conclusion: as of right now, there's no real reason for Adrien Agreste to be anything but a temporary holder. Certainly you can point to his experience with Plagg's power, and a few examples that seem to imply he can do more with it (in his second outing he was able to reconstruct part of the Eiffel Tower into a makeshift extension to catch someone from). Things that imply that if he perhaps received any actual training in the show like Marinette did from Fu, any guidance whatsoever from the Order or their Grimoire he might be able to achieve more.

But there's no solid evidence to expect that Marinette wouldn't be as effective, and the narrative precedent does not lend itself to the idea that anyone could overshadow Ladybug as a holder even of their own Miraculous. If anything, the sheer ability Marinette showed as Bug Noire implies that her having a partner instead of just keeping the ring herself is a detriment to any given situation.

If you can justify exposing the ring to potential capture in the first place considering that there seems to be no requirement to do. By all rights the practical thing to do is just keeping Plagg in the box instead of risking reality.

Of course we wanted to be generous, Adrien could still be of some use. He's the resident meatshield and narrative jobber. So long as he has a Miraculous he could continue faithfully serving in those roles, eating up mind-control beams and taking hits for Bug Noire so she can save the day as usual.

But everyone else on the Miraculous team might as well turn in their furry super-suits and go home.

-

You couldn't get a more black white depiction of the value of others outside of the protagonist. in Avatar, Aang is literally a semi-divine being who still needs to be humble and learn while the others around him still have useful special talents and prowess that he can't simply attain at will.

While in Miraculous, there's only one person of actual true competence. From Paris to Shanghai, Marinette alone is the capable one- barring the odd episode in the limelight (Alya and Felix stand up and take a bow. Adrien can stay seated).

There is a word for a character that is impossibly more capable than any other in spite of all reason and logic. And Marinette is increasingly fitting that mold as the show goes on. There's also a term for characters that ultimately contribute nothing good or bad to a story; wasted space. You can't have an entire ensemble of characters as part of the cast and have them provide nothing if they're supposed to have even a smidge of narrative value without making them something the story would be better off without.

Just as you can't just have one person at the centre of everything, make them capable of everything and not eventually have the story they're in turn into (at best) a power fantasy.

And it's a shame. Because Miraculous seemed like it could have been a lot more.

[theonceandfutureking6481]

BBC's Merlin Season 1 Episode 1: The Dragon's Call Analysis

*SPOILERS- FOR THE WHOLE SHOW*

So I just re-watched episode 1 of Merlin, The Dragon's Call and I thought I'd post my thoughts here, since this is the kind of thing I always wanted after I watched Merlin for the first time. Sorry, it's quite long!!

This episode is great fun to watch but also really interesting from a thematic perspective, as it introduces all the key characters and many key themes that continue throughout the show.

Setting it up as subverting traditional telling's of the legend

The wonderful thing about Arthurian legend is how many ways you can tell it, there is very little canon, it's whole point is that it has been reinterpreted time and again to say different things, be that as it may there are traditional elements which tend to remain constant and Merlin keeps some of these but many it takes out and it sets that up here.

The introduction is like a fairytale, "the young warlock arriving at the gates of Camelot", feels very much like the introduction to a fairy tale. This is on one hand telling us that this is a story we know like any fairytale, but the very fact that Merlin is young shows us that it is going to be different.

On the side, I love the line "A boy that will in time father a legend", because there's just this wonderful gap between the audience and the characters (as there is throughout the whole story), we know that Merlin will do great things, we know that Arthur will too, they are stories we have heard (tying again into that fairytale esque introduction), and its wonderful to know that, to see Merlin and know that he is destined for greatness.

Introduction to characters:

I haven't got a specific section for Merlin here, but its sort of strewn throughout everyone elses.

Morgana:

If you know Arthurian legend you will know that in many (even most) versions of the story Morgana is a villain, so her introduction here is both scary and fascinating. She is so clearly not a villain, and you wonder (if Merlin stays true to this element) what is going to change and happen that she will become one. I knew from the start that Morgana would become a villain (I had heard a lot of spoilers), so it was especially tragic and interesting to watch her character arc because I always knew. Interestingly she is immediately set up in alliance with Merlin, even though they barely interact. We know that he is a sorcerer, and her first lines are oppositional to Uther's stance on magic, she out of everyone in Camelot seems the most likely ally. This is the start of what becomes parallel character arcs, Morgana and Merlin are both fighting for magic to become legal but they end up going about it in different ways, and one is the main villain, the other our hero. They are the same and yet opposites, and the setting up starts from here.

Arthur:

Arthur appears quite simply to be a spoiled bully, not exactly what we expect from the King Arthur we know and love. The position he starts in though is important for a key element of the story which is Merlin and Arthur creating a better world in many ways directly oppositional to Uther's teachings, based on love, kindness, willingness to put others first and respect for others. Uther's world is one where strength is rewarded and he is (in a more adult way than Arthur) a bully, as we learn later he is someone who takes his anger and fear out on others, who takes advantage of his position to hurt people even those he loves. Uther can be a good king, but not when it asks him to make sacrifices of his worldview or things that really matter to him. Uther teaches Arthur some important things but there are many things Arthur has to unlearn, and these bullish tendencies, and lack of respect for others inherent in them are one of them. We do however see Arthur's inherent nobility and goodness in this episode. When he lets Merlin go because even though he's an idiot "he's a brave one", it shows us how Arthur respects what people do rather than who they are. Uther wouldn't of let Merlin go (though to be fair Uther probably wouldn't of picked a fight with a peasant), he would have thought that the law had to be upheld no matter the individual circumstance. Merlin attacked the prince that is definitely illegal but Arthur respects his courage (even though it came at the cost of his humiliation), and there is something different to Uther in that, even good.

Merlin and Arthur:

This episode aside from setting the tone for the more hilarious aspects of Merlin and Arthur's relationship establishes some other interesting things about what they are going to be to each other in this version of the story. Traditionally Merlin is Arthur's teacher, often tutoring him as a child, obviously this doesn't happen here but they retain that element of teaching here. Kilgharrah literally says that maybe it is Merlin's job to change the fact that Arthur's an idiot. Merlin challenges Arthur from the start, willing to criticise him and treat him as an equal (which Arthur actually appears to love), and we see perhaps what Merlin is going to teach Arthur and the more noble elements of Arthur's character that Merlin's going to bring. It is also only within the context of his interactions with Merlin that we see Arthur's best side (at least in this episode). Merlin shows Arthur that he has to treat all people with respect, Arthur recognises that Merlin is brave and full of qualities that Arthur himself admires. When Merlin saves Arthur's life you can see Arthur re-evaluating everything he thought he knew about him, there is a respect there.

Arthur's Mum Igraine

She's not a big part of this episode but she was mentioned and I think its interesting how she's represented. In many ways her representation is highly simplistic, she falls to the fate of many fairy tale mothers in being dead before the story begins, she's a plot device. She is presented (not outright but implied) with all the stereotypical virtues mothers are ascribed with, the woman who's trying to kill Arthur this episode talks to Uther about how hard it must have been for Arthur to grow up without a mother. It's not a huge scene but its an insight into Arthur's character, he was brought up with all the hate and bullishness of Uther without a mother who could have taught him love and kindness. As we later learn Igraine's death triggered the great purge, her loss very much symbolises the loss of love within the kingdom, both in what Arthur's like at the beginning as well as what Camelot has become under Uther's leadership.

Gwen (and Merlin):

She is wonderful and sweet and interestingly (especially for an audience that knows Arthur is going to marry her one day) a servant. It is interesting that the two people who become in the show (and we know as an audience will one day be) closest to Arthur are servants.

The thing about Arthurian legend is that typically its very much set within a context of Medieval feudalism, which means stringent social barriers. The code of equality inherent in the idea of a Round Table is equality among nobles, the code of chivalry is a code of honour for knights not for ordinary people. It's a reflection of the social realities of the era that inspires much of the aesthetic of Arthurian legend as well as the era in which most key tenants of the legend were formed. In making Merlin (Arthur's teacher & (in this show) best friend/soulmate) and Guinevere (Arthur's wife) servants, this show is changing this idea for one more reflective of our own times. It is about absolute equality of all people, and as I've said already the inherent value that every single human being has and the individual capabilities for nobility and goodness and everything the Knights Code admires. It thus sets the tone for what Arthur is going to represent, not just the ideal of knighthood and courage but the ideal of kingship for all people and the ideal of the world that matters to every person.

The self reproducing nature of love and hate

This is an idea which I've always viewed as the main theme of Merlin, the idea that hate begets itself, as does love. This episode is a perfect encapsulation of that theme which recurs again and again. Uther kills a man who is innocent (in the sense that he didn't actually hurt anybody) and the man's mother seeks vengeance and in doing so kills more innocent people because she hates Uther enough that she doesn't care who else she hurts to get at him. This happens again and again in the show, but what this show does that I love is turn it into a main theme by depicting the reverse. Arthur and Merlin are great because they act against this world of Uther's creation, they act with love and compassion and respect for all people, the ends rarely justify the means and most importantly, especially when their actions seem morally grey, they are always motivated by their love for others (not fear or hate- unlike Uther and any number of villains). Uther is the main villain of the show precisely because it is his actions that create every other villain they encounter, Morgana sums it up nicely and somewhat ominously (given what side she ends up on)- "the more brutal you are the more enemies you'll create". Uther views that brutality as strength, but it is the weakness at the heart of his kingdom, it is what makes Camelot a worse place it is what puts everyone he cares about in danger. Essentially the plot of the first episode sets up the cycle of violence that Uther started, though it doesn't set up Merlin and Arthur as breaking it it does set up the idea of equality and respect for all people that Arthur will learn and is essentially opposed to the brutality and cruelty and hate represented by Uther.

Fun non-analysis things

It mightn't seem like it but I do actually watch Merlin for reasons other than copious analysis of themes. It is a highly enjoyable show with characters and relationships (Merthur but also just generally the wonderful representation of friendship and loyalty) I love, and its actually really funny.

Gwen saying "Who'd want to marry Arthur" is peak comedy because we all know, well you.

The weird set up in Gaius' first scene as him being bumbling and slightly insane (in the mad wise old man sort of way), there is literally no carry through, he's not even like this in the rest of the episode, but its hilarious so who cares.

Merlin and Arthur's whole exchange is the funniest thing and Arthur had every insult coming. Also this is exactly how you set up enemies to lovers.

All the writers names begin with J? It's just something I notice every time the intro credits roll and it's just funny (Julian Murphy, Johnny Capps, Jake Michie and Julian Jones)- also two Julian's, I mean what are the chances?

[altairattorney]

In response to your little rant about Homura's depiction in Rebellion, here's this.

"The end of Rebellion is... controversial, but let's unpack what happened here. What occurred?

Well, firstly, Homura was traumatized and tortured; the Homura at the end of Rebellion is not the Homura of PMAS; she's gone through trauma and loss that PMAS!Homura can't even conceive of. She literally turned into a fucking witch because Kyubey gaslit her into thinking she made up Madoka Kaname, according to Wraith Arc.

Then, during this process, she learns two important facts that fucks her worldview: 1) Madoka didn't want to leave her loved ones and give up her normal life if she had any other alternative, and 2) Kyubey is trying to destroy the Law of Cycles (that is, Madoka Kaname), and has figured out a means of stopping her from interacting with Magical Girls under controlled lab conditions, meaning they could eventually succeed in their objective.

That means if Homura let herself go into the Law of Cycles, she would be unable to protect Madoka, and the Incubators would eventually destroy her. Madoka will have been erased and forgotten with nothing to show for it. Homura could only cope with everything with the promise of being reunited with her and the solace that Madoka's sacrifice was worth it, and Kyubey took that away from her.

And, more importantly: Homura's wish had yet to come true. Homura's wish wasn't to be with Madoka, or to save the world. It was to protect Madoka. To be the one to protect her.

To put it in other terms, Homura was self-loathing to the point of suicide-ideation because she was worthless, good for nothing, a burden on everyone. That she should just die. Madoka saw worth in her, and tried to change that, but Madoka died.

Only one person in her entire life ever told Homura she was happy to have met her and this wonderful, kind, happy, heroic, courageous, beautiful, miracle of a person who walked into her life to tell her those words died.

DIED. FOR. HER.

Died to protect her. Died so that a worthless piece of SHIT like herself could live. Someone who had EVERYTHING in the world died with a smile to protect someone who didn't even want to. Not without her.

Not instead of her.

She was good for nothing before and now her mere existence caused the best person she'd ever known to die. She ruined Madoka's entire life by having been a part of it.

She has to fix it. She has the chance to.

She wishes, wishes, WISHES to go back, to unfuck this, to undo this, to be cool like Madoka said she could have been. To protect her. To be her shield. To be WORTH something because she protected something valuble. To pay her back for all her kindness like she'd never been able to do and finally, finally in her life, have done something that justifies everything else.

She didn't wish for Madoka to live. She didn't wish for her to be saved. She wished to be the one to save her so she could support her and reinvent herself as someone who isn't a garbage shit person.

And every single time, she fails.

No matter what she does. No matter how she compromises herself. No matter what disgusting sins she does (and she never crosses so many lines that she says she WOULD cross). Madoka keeps dying.

And most of those times. She dies for Homura. She dies, again, for Homura. She dies again and again and again and again in order to help Homura.

Until the very last time, she wishes to save Homura (and everyone else), so much that she never existed at all.

Dammit. Dammit. DAMMIT. DAMMIT. This is worse this is WORSE THIS IS WORRRRSE!

But she still tries to cope. Madoka's in heaven. She's saving everyone. Madoka had a smile. The world is BETTER, and she'll see her again.

Until the above happened. And Kyubey is going to destroy Madoka Kaname. She won't have ever been born and she won't even be saving Magical Girls. She'll truly be nothing.

Because she came to save Homura, fucking AGAIN.

And all this time she still never saved her. Never ONCE saved her. Not a single time has she ever, ever, EVER fucking saved her. Not ever, has she ever saved her, not even when Madoka made her final fucking wish.

Homura made a wish that never came true. So she never stopped being Good for Nothing. She has never made up for Madoka's kindness. She has never, emotionally, left that moment where she sobbed over Madoka's dead corpse in the water and the rain. And she's done that so many fucking times.

So that's her mindset. So when she saw the chance. She took it. If you can interact with Madoka, you can effect Madoka. So.

God dammit. Fucking for once. Fucking finally. This time, her last chance she'll EVER HAVE... she will save her.

Save Madoka Kaname. Not a vague concept. Not a hero. Not a law or a god. Not a cosmic idea. Madoka. KANAME. The person who smiled at her and said she was cool. The person who helped her buy a cellphone. The kind, wonderful person who loved and named a stray cat and pressed her face to hers and laughed and congratulated her for her accomplishments. The person who said that meeting Homura was her happiest memory.

Why can't this person, of all people, be happy? All Madoka Kaname wanted was to live her fucking life. With her family. With her friends and classmates. Living her day to day life which wasn't anything special but it was so special to her.

She WILL save her. Goddammit, she failed so many times because she always kept holding herself back but if this is her last chance then GODDAMMIT fuck it all, damn herself too.

She never cared, really, about being with Madoka. She was willing to die for her. She explicitly had plans to leave the town to Kyouko after Walpurgisnacht and LEAVE (probably to kill herself so her Witch didn't come for Madoka). She was going to die for her in Rebellion so that she'd be safe from the Incubators.

If she could save her, if she can finally succeed and protect that human smile living her human life, it's fine if Homura Akemi isn't a part of it. If Madoka can smile, she doesn't have to smile at her anymore. That's PERFECTLY FINE.

So she did it. She stole a piece of the Law of Cycles. Not a big piece. Not the Law, or the Power, or the Salvation. The Law of Cycles still functions in some sense, because there's still no Witches, there's still Wraiths, there's still Angels.

She stole "Madoka Kaname", the human being that the Goddess used to be. She stole her, yes. She took over the universe, yes. But what did she do?

She made it so Madoka Kaname existed, again. Reunited with everyone she cared about. She gave Kyouko, Mami, Sayaka, and everyone else the happiest lives she could give them without undoing their pasts (disrespecting their agency and core selves), even if it was only to keep Madoka happy in her silver garden.

She tortures Kyubey but no one's crying tears over that fucker. She seems to be letting the world run its course as naturally as possible, save for suppressing people's memories of what's really going on.

Sayaka, alive. Nagisa, alive. Living with Kyouko and Mami respectively. Madoka, alive.

Hell, the only change she made that we know of to Madoka's memories is three years in America.

Because, canonically, English is Madoka's worst subject.

And now, she's great at it.

No matter what it takes. Madoka Kaname will be happy. She deserves it. And Homura will make that happen, even if she, herself, never is.

But yeah go off about how Homura is a yandere stalker who likes to kill people."

Hey there! I thank you for your post and your insight, and I wanted to clarify that I don't disagree at all with this view of Rebellion and how it ended. I think it is all correct, actually. The problem I have with it is 1. Rebellion existing at all, and 2. the way they portrayed her choice as an act of evil conceived by a demon.

To begin with, there are a few details that I don't think really make sense considering how pmmm worked. Homura shouldn't even be a witch, first of all. Secondly, even though she cannot know for sure, I don't think Homura would have willingly told Kyubey about the world of before if there were any danger. Heck, I don't even understand how Kyubey could possibly have stolen Madoka, now that she is not an entity but a literal concept, a rule of the universe. Imo that is beyond absurd. Third, I am doubtful Homura would have gone against Madoka's wish, even though I totally understand why she did in the context of Rebellion.

The problem I have with Homura is that people thought about her as a yandere emotionless stalker who has an unhealthy obsession with Madoka even before Rebellion existed. That was a popular sentiment, and the big, big problem I have with this film is that while what she did isn't inherently bad or wrong - as you explained - the movie paints her as a LITERAL DEMON in the moment she makes that choice, and ALSO at the exact same time she declares her love canonically. That is so fucked up in so so so many ways. As not literal it may be, they gave her that creepy smile, and show that Madoka is confused in her new bubble and feels like she is someone else but can't remember why. And Homura brushes it off. As wonderful as it is that she is there, Madoka is uncomfortable, Sayaka is obviously enraged and Homura plays the part of the Evil Character.

This is just all so unfair and so wrong. It doesn't only negate the way this anime ended - and of course Homura deserved to go with peace and quiet like everyone else. No magical girl has to ever suffer like that again, including Madoka, right? (There were so many ways to reunite her with Madoka, but no.) It also visibly paints Homura as being on the dark side, and validates the horrific lens people saw her character through even before the film. It canonizes her as a lesbian in the same moment she is doing something clearly framed as wrong, and, on a surface level, reinforces her obsession. This is just a textbook predatory lesbian trope. I am sorry if you don't see it the same way, but it is just horrific to me.

I will never agree with Rebellion existing. I cannot stand the ending of this anime being undone and Homura being punched in the face and further tortured both in universe and as a character, after all the crap she went through. It is just disrespectful.

And as I said, she deserved better.

[irkenheretic]

okay i promised id do it and im doing it: Explaining The Plot Of That AU I’m Vague About: The Post

(as i was preparing to write this i actually got my 250th follower, which slapped)

so i’m just gonna start with the simple version, which is this: it’s a rebel AU which primarily centers around the tallest, who are both defective. they give up on trying to make any meaningful changes as figureheads, and instead direct their attention to being involved with the “neo defect revolution,” or NDR. they do manage to make one change as tallest- there is a garbage dump planet turned into a sanctuary for defectives (who in this au are executed once discovered,) and eventually enough of the populace finds out about it that the tallest have to deal with it. they finesse their way into kicking it out of the empire, so now it’s its own planet with its own rules, governments, and most importantly, immigration policies and protections

a lot of stuff happens and it’s gonna be structured using arcs, and each arc has a separate protagonist/deuteragonist/tritagonist lineup (but that doesnt mean the same lineup won’t be used multiple times!) and yes the insane list of OCs are for this au alone: some arcs are very OC-centric, some have OCs as supporting characters, and a couple are all-OC or mostly-OC. 

its going to be very longform and it’ll span from the tallest’s elite training days to twenty years after zim arrives on earth. (the 20 year gap btwn zim arriving on earth and the story proper isnt as tightly plotted as later tho.) the point is to see how a revolution on the scale of the NDR works, who was fucked over by defact laws, who was fucked over by other laws, etc. theres a lot of lore and a lot of headcanons i made for this AU and even a conlang. i am a being of hubris. itll be a series of fics, some multichapter and some oneshots. 

the series as a whole is gonna be called Invader Zim: Annexed or just Annexed for short. its a pun on an irken word that sounds similar but means the exact opposite. i am not explaining more bc itll be explained in the fic itself. but thats why the tag for it is #anx lmao

i didnt mean for this to be as long as it got but under the cut im gonna breakdown some of the early arcs:

so it all starts with a fanfic called Love Is The H-Word (no the “h-word” isn’t “hell.) it centers around red and purple as elites-in-training, who do a little whoopsie and have an egg. purple doesnt wanna smuggle it into a smeetery, bc then he’ll never see it again, so they go to the defect sanctuary (still a part of the empire at this point.) purple knows he’s defective while red has a hard time accepting that he is as well, due to events from his past. but being around all these other defects are starting to wear down his denial, and the fic is all about that. it also sets up some plot stuff, like how defects adopted a self-identifier in the word “heretic,” hence the sanctuary being named, “heretirk.” (hey look my url!) (no, the “h-word” is not heretic, either.) 

i dont wanna say what happens in that fic bc spoilers, but stuff Happens. its also when we meet some ocs that end up being important, and the existence of others are foreshadowed. this is also where we meet the tallests’ future advisor, rarl kove, for the first time, as a local who decides to keep them company. purple bonds with kove due to their shared interest in politics, while red reluctantly bonds with titch, a young irken (a smeet in heretirken standards, an adult in imperial standards- did i mention he and red are roughly the same age? lol) who is interested in military stuff and thrill-seeking and general destruction. titch is pissed because he claims his father is stealthing on devastis as a military commander, but won’t let titch sneak in as a soldier, as titch is deaf. 

(fun facts: in the au, “titch” is regional slang for “a little bit.” ironically, titch the character is above-average in height.)

due to titch’s deafness, he developed “gesturespeak,” irken sign language, so he can communicate. this existing becomes important later

a oneshot called invade the system is right after h-word in publishing order. it details zim’s exploits in leaving foodcourtia, where he was assigned and infiltrating the invading academy he eventually graduates from (in this au, zim is too short to be an invader, which sucks because the hight minimums for the military are really short to begin with lmao)

the fic chronoligically after H-Word focuses on red and purple being back in their platoon on devastis, specifically red navigating his training and his relationships with two defective platoonmates, pon and zi (who are in h-word a little,) after the realization that he too is defective. it also focuses on how the irken military works, and how they train their soldiers. 

the first arc overall focuses on red and purple going thru training and such, and ends after they graduate and are on the field, working to get commander rank. (they planned to gain commander rank then leave and go back to heretirk to train an army there, as heretirk has.... no army.) in the middle of this, they’re pulled out and told they are to become the next tallest. they debate over staying and taking the job or just running to heretirk, and they ultimately decide to stay.

the next arc i call the “bridge,” tbh. its less tightly plotted than the other arcs; fics are spread apart from each other chronologically and all that. it spans the time after the tallest being appointed to a little after zim arrives on earth. it also has a couple of anthologies focusing on imperial defects- each chapter is a new character. these guys are all important and the easiest way for me to introduce their backstories without cluttering everything up is anthology style, lmao. other things that happen are a look into how the tallest work, eventually culminating with the resolution of the tallest having to Deal With Heretirk, tenn’s rescue from meekrob, and zim on earth obtaining a half-irken smeet named pip due to stealing an Unethical Science Experiment from dib (which is pip.) the bridge is basically just. “heres some stuff that happens between point A and point B so when we get to point B you’re not confused as all hell.” 

the next arc focuses on zim. in the first fic, pip is sick and zim is trying to get into his neighbor’s pants, to cope. this basically sets up that zim in this au has no idea how to find personal fulfillment in living- he’s only OK if he focuses on pleasing someone else, be it taking care of pip or doting on the neighbor, some rando human named piqu (pronounced, “peek.”) this is mainly a cute romance story with the underlying veneer of “a child is slowly and painfully dying” in the background. fun! 

without spoiling the circumstances, zim and pip end up on heretirk, which at this point is its own independent planet. pip is in the hospital for most of it so zim has to do his own thing. computer fans rejoice bc hes basically zims dad at this point, who tells him to go outside and get some fresh air and talk to the locals instead of schmooping or screaming in anxiety. im sneakily introducing more characters like ini, the “next-gen zim;” a short bio-engineer (she works on PAKs) who was constantly passed over by everyone because they dont trust someone that short or they dont trust someone that spazzy, even though shes actually brilliant. also her brother mo, who’s a pilot that NOBODY will teach military-class ships to (at this point, HTK has a population of ex-military that had their old ships, but still no formal army) because he doesnt talk and they think hes “slow” as a result. for the curious, he is physically able to talk most times, he just doesnt like it. zim ends up teaching him how to fly military-class which ends up being important laterrr

(haha ini and mo. wheres meenie and minie? ILL GET TO THEM)

no really, theyre quadruplets. named ini, myni, minie, and mo. these are real characters. 

minie isnt introduced till later. shes too cool to be the side character in someone elses arc. she is feel uncomfortable when we are not about her.

myni is busy palling around with pip and pip’s friend “elly” (real name elevenn, with two N’s.) elly is a half-meekrob War Crime Baby and tenn’s smeet. he has vision problems (he can “see” energy signatures of things, as opposed to conventional sight. everything is monochrome and he has to really focus to see like, words on a paper. also fuck tablets) but the trade-up is telekinetic powers (that he cant use too much or his brain will melt. fun!) this isnt relevant until the arc AFTER zim’s, where they end up poking around a historical site due to myni’s interest in that kind of thing, and they find logs of an old revolution (that was actually pretty successful in their goal, before they were caught and executed,) that lead them to a man named lefy. he helps with revolutions and helped these guys, and the trio go to seek him out; myni because he wants to impress his parents with helping them, pip because after they’ve recovered enough to walk around and do stuff, feel like they need to justify the choice to save their life and make their dad proud and all that, elly because he doesnt want pip to get hurt and die. And thats where the stuff REALLY starts happening and i cant tell u more sorry

this seemed kind of disjointed but thats bc i cant really be too detailed otherwise id like.... spoil it lmfao. but thats the summary of the first few arcs.

[abduct-me-helen]

Class 108′s Apocalypse Field Trip | Chapter 5.

“Marcy’s alive?” Jon asked incredulously, eyes wide in surprise. Martin stood next to him, and their height different was apparently “adorable,” or so class 108 had said.

“That’s what Annabelle told me.” Martin replied, thinking back to the conversation and searching for details in the way that she’d sounded. He knew he was dealing with the Web though; Annabelle was nothing if not manipulative and direct in both her overt and subtle actions.

“On the phone.” Jon raised an eyebrow questioningly.

“That’s where we talked, yeah.” Martin confirmed, his tone shifting as he looked behind them to see Elliot and Raphi snogging while the others, (minus Riko and Katie), chanted “make out! Make out!” over and over again.

Nope, he was not getting into that.

“How? Why is Annabelle keeping her alive?” Jon asked, pointedly ignoring what was going on behind them.

“She’s not, or at least that’s what she said. She thinks it has something to do with the End.” Martin told him wearily.

“That’s lucky for us.” Jon said.

“Why?”

“We’re coming upon the Corpse Roots soon enough.”

Martin perked up. “Are we going to, you know, go kill bill?”

Jon hesitated.

“Jon.”

“I don’t know, Martin. It’s-Oliver Banks rules over this domain.” He explained, gesturing wildly.

“So?” Martin questioned, raising an eyebrow.

“I, I just don’t think…I don’t think he’s evil.”

“Oh, I’m sure he’s a very benevolent ruler of a hellish fear prison.” Martin replied sarcastically.

“It’s just-he helped me. Wh-when I was,” Jon sighed, running his hand through his hair and taking a second to pause, “He woke me up.”

“Wow, what a hero.” Martin deadpanned.

“Martin?” Jon asked, amused and raising an eyebrow.

“What.” Martin said shortly. Jon made an amused noise, an all-too-knowing smile beginning to grow on his face.

“Yeah, alright; I know; I’m sorry.” Martin apologized quickly, sighing.

Jon was now smirking, voice full of amusement. “…Is there something you want to talk about?”

No, I’m-fine; it’s fine; everything’s fine! I’m sorry.” Martin said quickly, ducking away and speeding up his footsteps. Jon did the same to match him, a smug grin on his face.

“Martin…” His expression was like the cat getting the cream.

“I said it’s fine.” Martin snapped quickly.

“Are you jealous?” Jon questioned, oh so audibly smug.

“Yeah, Martin, are you jealous?” Raphi yelled, pulling away quickly before snogging Elliot once again.”

“Oooh…” The class’s eyes lit up, their voices in unison, getting higher in pitch as their call of smugness continued. Turning away from the couple, they advanced towards the two men who led the head of their group. Cal clapped politely at Elliot and Raphi as they broke away to join the rest of his peers in taunting Martin.

“Just-just, hey, why is everyone ganging up on me!” Martin cried indignantly. Elliot smirked, before starting a chant.

“Mr. Sims and Martin, sitting in a tree. K-I-S-S-I-N-G. First comes love-” Elliot grinned as he spoke, before Cal cut him off quietly.

“-Then comes marriage-”

“Then comes a baby in a baby carriage!” Tabitha finished, grinning with a smug glee.

-

“Don’t they have anything better to do then gossip about our teacher’s love life?” Riko scoffed, trailing behind the rest of the class with Katie at her right.

“…probably not.” Katie answered dully, looking on with something akin to judgmental fondness, as much as that could be expressed on someone who was as reigned in as her.

“…that’s fair.”

-

“I told you not to Know things about me!” Martin pointed at Jon, telling him off.

Jon laughed. “I really didn’t have to.”

“I-y-you-good. ‘Cause I’m definitely not.” Martin said stubbornly, looking ahead in defiance.

“Sure.” “Pfft, that’s such a lie-” “Are you scared he’s gonna steal yo’ man?” “PUT A RING ON IT MARTO!”

“Alright!” Jon agreed smugly, obviously taunting Martin.

“Look, I’m fine, alright?” Martin told him forcefully.

“You said.” Jon agreed, nodding with a knowing smirk.

“Yes, I did! And e-and even if I was jealous, I would be perfectly justified anyway, so!” Martin explained quickly, refusing to look Jon in the eye.

Class 108 was snickering, and Martin decidedly didn’t comment on that.

Respect your elders! he wanted to tell them. But he couldn’t control them, no matter how much he wanted to. They were teens.

Teens.

He sighed inwardly, mentally banging his head against a wall.

“But you’re not.” The fact that Jon’s amusement was almost tangible is one that Martin loathed.

“No! I’m fine.” Martin exclaimed.

“Hey, give him a break. I say murder is a go.” Elliot coos, and Cal laughs quietly behind him.

“I don’t think that’s a good idea.” Rosie said, laughing.

“Riko agrees with me. Hey! Riko! You agree, don’t you?” Elliot raised his voice, gaining Riko’s attention.

“Oh, I’m not getting involved.” She told him, raising her eyebrow.

“Pfft, boring.” He said, sighing dramatically.

“Tch.”

“Look. Martin, I’m sorry you feel that way, but I’m not going to kill a man just because you’re jealous.” Jon and Martin continued to argue, both attempting, (and failing), to tune out class 108’s jeers.

“Why not?!”

Beat.

Martin deflated. “Yeah. Yeah, I know, I know, I know.” He sighed, before pausing. “Please?”

Jon laughed and Martin’s lip quirked upwards.

“Let’s go apeshit! Let’s go fucking apeshit!” Tabitha screeched, pumping her fist into the air.

“Language.” Jon chastised, heart not in it.

Tabitha stuck her tongue out.

-

Cypress felt…strange. It was the only way to put it. The corpse roots were comforting, in their own way, and he looked on with a fondness that should have surprised him.

It didn’t.

He knew what the End was now, but he still thought of it as death more than anything else. And he found peace in that.

Or maybe it was the depression talking.

He didn’t really care.

But he was pulled in, interested and feeling an odd, almost tugging need to do something. He had no idea what that something was, but he knew he’d find out soon.

“-know, but I just, I need to. I can be ignorant when all of this is going on!” Tabitha said loudly, surprising Cypress out of his reverie. He turned, and saw that she was talking to Mr. Sims.

“Statements…Tabitha, they change you. I’m not sure-”

Ah, so this was what they were arguing over. Cypress had been worried too. Tabitha’s hunger for knowledge was not knew, but the desperation to get it certainly way.

Or maybe not. The more he thought about it, the more he realized it had always been there it to an extent.

“Please,” she begged, voice rising, “I just-I need to know. This world, it’s…it’s terrible. I can’t just sit here and do nothing.”

“You really think this will change anything?” Riko shot back acerbically.

“No, but it’ll make me feel better, so piss off.” Tabitha snapped, then sighed. “Sorry Riko.” She apologized.

Riko rolled her eyes, but said nothing.

Jon sighed. “Fine. Okay. You can listen.” Martin raised an eyebrow, and he shook his head. Tabitha cheered.

Cypress stepped closer. “I,” he paused, looking around before finalizing his thoughts, “I want to listen too.”

Jon was once again taken aback. “Why?” he said, incredulous.

Cypress shrugged. “I don’t know. I just,” he sighed, “I have my reasons, okay?”

Jon nodded slowly, sighing and motioning Martin to leave with the rest of the class, who looked on concernedly.

He waited a moment before he furrowed his brows and talked once again, looking up at the two students. “Once I start, I can’t stop. But if you get uncomfortable, at all, please leave. I won’t think worse of you or take offense. Agreed?”

Tabitha and Cypress nodded, but they both knew they’d stay, no matter how horrible it was. Jon sighed, and began the statement.

Report to prevent future deaths. This report is being sent to:   The Great Eye that watches all who linger in terror and gorges itself on the sufferings of those under its unrelenting, stuporous gaze. And its Archive, which draws knowledge of this suffering unto itself.

One: Coroner.

I am Oliver Banks, sometimes known as Antonio Blake or Dr Thomas Pritchard. I serve The Coming End That Waits for All and Will Not Be Ignored.

Two: Coroner’s legal powers.

I make this report under no authority; no regulation or act of law save the hollow power and grim responsibility given me by the Termination of All Life. With it, I may see and spread the hidden veins of destiny that wrap us close and draw us through the empty, yearning parody of meaning that we call life, knowing at all stages that the last and final point of this journey is a blank and futile end.

I have no power to stop it, and even if I did, I would not do so. For to rob a soul of death is as torturous as its inevitable coming.

Three: Investigation and inquest.

On the first and last day of the age of the Beholding, I begin my vigil into the story of Cypress Evans.”

Cypress and Tabitha looked up, eyes wide.

“What?” They said in unison, before refocusing once again.

He was about thirteen when it happened. Or, rather, he happened. The tendrils of the lonely had clung to him, but that is not the focus of my tale. No, I suppose I’ll be blunt.

Cypress Evans killed himself.

Cypress grit his teeth, and Jon’s eyes were wide. Tabitha tried to get up, despite her curiosity, in order to preserve his privacy, but felt tied down to the roots like a string.

Cypress did the same, not wanting to remember the tale that was spilling from Jon’s mouth.

It wasn’t dramatic. He didn’t write a note, but in the days before his first ending he gave many gifts to those he cared about. Gifts that were his belongings.

He even wrote a small will, though it wasn’t as if it was anything official. He was thirteen; he didn’t have much property of his own.

But that is not the important part. What is important, is that he succeeded. Cypress Evans was officially dead for about five hours. No one found out.

Tabitha inhaled quickly, and this was not unnoticed by Cypress, who looked down in shame. She took his hand and gripped it while she maneuvered him to rest next to her, huddled into a ball while he shook.

Because he woke up.

Her eyes widened once again, glancing at him in shock.

His arm was knitted back together by some sort of thin, clear thread. And he was alive.

He didn’t tell a soul.

It was about two months later when he tried again, a different method this time. He tried pills. So many pills. A lot of pills.

And so, Cypress Evans died for the seemingly second time. And for the seemingly second time, he came back.

He looked away. Tabitha could guess that he thought it was a failure on his part, but she was glad that it hadn’t worked.

And worried for him.

How had she not known? Did she not pay enough attention?

She bit her lip in thought.

He is one of many thousands, neither remarkable nor unique in his background and goals. He has spent the last three of those years acutely aware of his seemingly immortal state of being and in constant dismay over it. The thing was, Cypress never feared death.

He craved it.

And it was being denied from him, one time, then two, then three, then four, then five, and so it goes on. At some point, it became recreational, to not be anything at all. To end, even if temporarily.

Cypress clenched his fist, and Tabitha squeezed his other hand.

Do not worry, Cypress. I’m certain you’re listening to this, though I’m not sure why I’m aware of that face. That thought was not my own, and I’m acutely aware of a spider crawling down my arm, so I can only assume one of the Web’s ilk is involved with this. Never the matter, I wanted to tell you this. No matter how immortal you may think you are, all things end, even if it takes a very, very long time.

You can be reassured that one day, you will die.

Tabitha hated the look of relief that washed over him, but shivered at the thought of being manipulated. The Web, above all others, irked her, ever since her experience with Marcy.

Back to my account.

Cypress, now sixteen years of age, if not for the odd situation regarding class 108, I believe he would’ve found himself within my domain, traveling slowly and unremittingly along the length of the stretching Corpse Routes.

And to his delight, eventually ending.

The earliest he can remember being certain he was about to die was when, at the age of six, due to allergies, he passed out. It was from a spider bite. Not a poisonous one, mind you. It was just his allergies, putting him in the hospital for a few hours.

The oddest thing though, was that he didn’t mind. Cypress had already accepted the inevitability of death, with his father passing away from cancer about two years prior to the bite. He found it reassuring, relaxing even.

The point was, Cypress was comforted by death.

And so it continued for the next three years of his life. He would die on the weekends, crave the release of not existing as a reward for doing so during the week. He always came back, groggily and painfully.

He never liked that part.

Five: Coroner’s concerns.

The matters of concern are as follows:

a) Cypress Evans was affected by the Web at some point during his life. I do not know what the reason for that is, but it’s a concern nonetheless. I do not know why Cypress does not walk the corpse roots, just as I do not know why class 108 seems to have been spared from the domains. I, again, suspect the Web to have something to do with this.

b) This place is a limit on the fear that can be generated from them, as their pool is necessarily finite and ultimately, however slowly, it will be exhausted.

To be offset, this consideration will require the acquisition of victims from other domains as replacements, potentially inciting…bad feeling between those domains.

c) A metaphysical quirk of this new reality’s divorce from the traditional concept of time, and - one for which I have no further explanation, means that I do not believe new humans are being created or born.

The souls trapped within this transformed world are the only ones who will ever be here, and the presence of the Termination of All requires that-ultimately, that is what will happen.

However slowly, the domains of death will be removing sufferers from a closed system. However many thousands of years may be experienced in time, eventually this world will be left barren and empty.

d) When this happens, the Great Powers themselves will also fade and die, withering away into nothingness and releasing this reality from their grip.

I… do not know how I feel about this.

Six: Actions that should be taken.

None. Even if such a fate could be avoided, as it comes closer and the other Entities grow in their awareness of their own end, the grotesque ripples of their own impossible panic shall glut and feed my master, gorging it to the point where-perhaps it will even surpass the Watcher in prominence.

Barring that, I have no desire to be destroyed by other Avatars who are upset at what they regard as “stealing” human souls to walk the Corpse Routes. If it becomes necessary to intervene at some point regarding whatever web the weaver is puppeting, I will do so.

The others may take what actions they wish; they may plot and plan and tear themselves apart in an attempt to separate from the fate that they know they cannot escape, but they will fail. The currents of perception and reality may twist in whatever shapes they want, but none of them can ever render things truly eternal.

And I shall help, ushering on this final, blank emptiness. Perhaps once it might have horrified me, or given me some sense of pursuing the ultimate release of the world that you have damned.

But I am too much of my Patron now, and my feelings cannot help but reflect the shadows of… anticipation that lurk within the grave. The End does not fear its own cessation, for it is the certainty and promise of all life, however strange, that it will one day finish, and that includes its own stark existence.

It shall be the last, and when the universe is silent and still forever, it shall, perhaps, in that impossible moment before it vanishes, finally be satisfied.

Seven: Your response.

Please, Jon, do not interpret this report as a plea for mercy or a call to action. I would have offered it willingly, of course, but to do so is no longer an option.

I only ask that you be wary. I do not know what, but I believe the Web is up to something. Bar that, I believe it to be controlling even you in a world where you wear the crown.

Finally, Cypress, know this. All things end, and every step you take, whatever direction you may choose, only brings you closer to it.

I’m sure that brings you comfort.

Report ends.

Jon looked up, eyes widening as he regained control.

Cypress bolted.

-

“What the fuck happened?” Riko asked, sitting down across from Tabitha, gesturing to Cypress, who was in a clearing alone. Cal was sitting next to him but they didn’t appear to be talking.

Tabitha shook her head mutely, sighing. “It’s-I’m not going to intrude on his privacy. It was just-it was just intense.” She gestured.

Riko shrugged. “He isn’t dead. It’ll be fine.”

Tabitha knew that Riko was trying to comfort her, but those words made her bark out a bitter laugh.

Riko raised an eyebrow.

Tabitha sighed. “Look, basically the statement Mr. Sims gave was about Cypress, and for some reason Cypress and I couldn’t leave.”

“Wait, like you were tied down?” Riko asked incredulously.

“No, like…ugh. I don’t know how to put it. Yes, like we were tied down, but it was…more than that.”

“Oh, that’s revealing.” Riko said sarcastically.

“Hm.” Tabitha agreed, before looking behind her to see Jon approaching. He walked up the green hill before sighing, and running his hand through his hair.

He does that a lot, Tabitha thought absently.

“May I speak to you in private?” Jon asked Tabitha, who nodded. Riko didn’t budge, and raised an eyebrow.

“I was here first.”

Tabitha snickered. “Fair.”

Jon followed her until they came to a spot next to a tree, leaves waxy and tinted with the green light of the sky.

“So,” Jon awkwardly began, “I think it would be best if you didn’t discuss Cypress’…condition with anyone else. I know you wouldn’t,” he added, “I just wanted to make sure.”

Tabitha nodded. “No, totally, I get it.”

Jon nodded gratefully. “Do you think he’d benefit from talking to Martin or I?”

Tabitha tilted her head in thought. “Not really. He seems like the kind of person to wear his heart on his sleeve, but…I don’t think he likes to be vulnerable with people. Cal seems to have it covered already though.” She pointed across the clearing to where Cal and Cypress were silently sitting side by side against the trunk of a thick hickory tree.

God, she hoped it was a hickory tree. While watching her friends get chased around by a living tree-monster thing was funny, it was also terrifying.

“That checks out. Well, that’s all I wanted to speak with you about.” His eyes seemed to glaze over familiarly, though Tabitha couldn’t quite place where she’d seen that look.

Tabitha nodded warily as he got up and walked towards Martin, leaving her alone with her thoughts.

-

[thisdreamplace]

Hii. Two people in my family r v self-righteous. They make unreasonable requests, then when those 'requests' arnt met obvii, they get v... You'll see

Many times they do things that exclude the certain person they're 'targeting' and will pretend its the other person (the target) who's acting wrong. Theyll team up and exclude the target, and if you mention this, they get v defensive and together lash out against the speaker, listijg long random details of how the speaker did so and so. And most of it is, frankly, unfair and unreasonable 'reasons'

Ive been the target, and so have others in my family. But these two refuse to get how hurtful and self-righteous their actions are! I say self righteous becaus they literally are convinced they have the 'right' to 'act' this way, as it seems so justified in their eyes. I can't deal with this, esp as it's a sensitice tkpic and in the past id fall into their guilt traps and as a result had near zero esteem + became a pushover at school. I'd think if im not being of use to anyonez or if I say no, it's so wrong and I'm a bad guy who has to suffer for that. Thanks to these Law blogs on tumbler and other things ive learned... That thinking is so victim-y blegh. Good for me, lol

Things in my family, as u can guess, aren't that great, thanks to this weird clique-ish behavjor, and other reasons too. But this reason, it's not only me who's facing this behavior? It's others too? And frankly idec abt this behavior that much coz I'm used to it and i am trying to see it as a challenge to improve my self concept eg realising it shouldn't really matter to me if I'm excluded and they make plans w/o me. Why shd I let myself get hurt? I can use this to realise im the one who can create and besides, I've been working on an assumption in which I'm leaving this place (not much success thereyet, but im spinning this in a positive way, if evrything is neutral!)

Ik why this happens to me - it's evry time I accept my olf assumptions on them acting this way, this creates more of the old story-- but why does it happen to others too? Or how can I make them realise wth they're doing? Theyre only damaging themselves anyway :(

Sorry for being all over the place

And also, I said im working on my self concept, so I found out some major beliefs I had, and while meditating i discovered this random old memory from when I was a child ig which I think is where I started to buy into me being guilty and ashamed of who I am. Ik this stuff is what they call shadow work but still do u know where I can go from here? How do I work with this awful memory? To like put it away forever, coz I thought being aware of it would be enough, but it isnt. Some say forgive urself, and the others in the memory, but idk it doesn't seem to work for me. I don't feel relief. Do u have experience with this? Or do u have a resource u could share with me that deals with this safely?

Ok bye bye luvv u

Hi!

Firstly I want to say I'm sorry this is something you are experiencing. But thanks to the law, you have the power to change it for good.

That being said, I think this is why it's really important to go all in when you come to the law of assumption. It's a lot deeper than just manifesting things. You can't be one foot in, one foot out when it comes to the law. You have to acknowledge all the concepts and learn how to apply them. You're experiencing a lot more grief over this topic, because of how you're not applying "everyone is you pushed out." Taking full responsibility for every aspect of the law, and therefore every aspect of your life, will lead you to the solutions you're seeking.

"but why does it happen to others too? Or how can I make them realise wth they're doing?"

It's not happening to anyone else. It's only happening to you and you're experiencing it happening to "others" because of how you're keeping this reality alive. You don't have to make them realize anything, not by force anyway. All you have to do is go within. There is no one to change but self. Period. There's a really good article that could help you get on the right track with this:

No One To Change But Self

When it comes to that memory, from my experience the best I could ever do is let it be and know how it means nothing anymore. Even if it still hurts. The thing is, self concept work has more to do with building self confidence. And this confidence lies in remembering who you really are: God of your reality. The more you focus on that instead, the pain surrounding the memory will begin to dissolve on it's own. Because you know how anything not aligned with love just simply isn't the truth anymore. I think this following article could be helpful in giving you an idea on how to navigate difficult inner moments.

Self Acceptance

I hope this is helpful! 💖

[browniesnivy]

hiii brownie idk enough abt yugioh but *insert one of ur yugioh faves* and umm maybe franziska for that character ask game :]

Franziska Von Karma 

How I feel about this character- FRANZISKA LITERALLY SO AMAZING...I love how she’s introduced as just as terrifying and cruel as her father, but then you see that she really does care about helping other people throughout her determination to avenge Edgeworth and to help Phoenix save Maya in Farewell My Turnabout despite taking a bullet to the shoulder (such a good parallel with her father on its own!)... and then with the scene at the airport she’s is allowed to be emotionally vulnerable without being any less of a competent prodigy of law! She’s just... so fucking cool I LOVE HER!

All the people I ship romantically with this character- Maya Fey! I love the contrast between both of their personalities making them seem like total opposites, but when you look at their connection to a family legacy it becomes obvious they have a lot in common. I wish the games had expanded on their dynamic more, but unfortunately lesbians are oppressed :( 

My non-romantic OTP for this character- VON KARMA SIBLINGS... Mieke I know you agree with me on this! They grew up with the same terrible expectation that come with being a prodigy, and so they’re really the only ones who’s can comfort and understand each other... they obviously both feel such an obligation to protect each other and it makes me so CRAZY UGH. BROTHER AND SISTER! 

My unpopular opinion about this character- I don’t think this is an unpopular opinion but I wish she’d kept the shorter hair design from the concept art where her hair is slicked forward to contrast with her father’s slicked back hair, not only because I’m a lesbian and that hairstyle was SO GAY but because I think it could have highlighted or even foreshadowed how she differs from Manfred. Maybe since she hasn’t been able to abandon his influences by Justice for All it wouldn’t make since for her to have such a “wild” hairstyle, but I think that if she returns it would be amazing to see her with that hairstyle to represent how she’s moved on after a decade.

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon- SHOW HER DENOUNCING MANFRED VON KARMA FOR REAL. I can understand that it would take time for her to fully accept that her father was not as admirable as she’d been least to believe, but by this point in the timeline I think it’s time for that aspect of her character arc to be resolved. The natural conclusion of her development requires her experiencing the same acceptance of defeat as her brother, so I really hope that if they bring Franziska back at some point she’ll be allowed to admit that her father was awful and that victory isn’t an indication of worth.

Rex Raptor

How I feel about this character- HE IS MY FAVORITE CHARACTER IN ANY PIECE OF MEDIA EVER. I know that he isn’t meant to be a deep character at all and he isn’t given much narrative focus at all but he is just SO DAMN ENDEARING TO ME OKAY. I have an unhealthy obsession with how he is initially introduced as being crass and inconsiderate while Weevil is more polite and strategic, but then it turns out Weevil is a total asshole while Rex is just... a kid who likes dinosaurs and duels for fun? Like even though he’s a total dumbass (the best character trait) who can be a bit rude (not even mean-spirited if we’re being totally honest, like most of his remarks are just him being snarky), the manga describes him as “having to the spirit of a true duelist” and he never really seems as bitter about losing as his counterpart Weevil (except in the Season 4 filler arc, which although I adore for giving me so much more Rex content, makes a lot mistakes by characterizing him as basically interchangeable with Weevil... BUT that’s ANOTHER STORY for ANOTHER DAY). I mean he has more justifiable reasons to be upset than Weevil given how he was LITERALLY cheated out of the Battle City tournaments by Espa (which Mokuba the official rule enforcer LETS THEM GET AWAY WITH and then doesn’t do ANYTHING to compensate Rex), and he STILL tries to warn Joey to stay away from trouble despite him being the guy he supposedly dislikes because he took his best card, totally disgracing him and ruining his entire career. I could keep going but this paragraph isn’t probably already sickeningly long and I still need to be able to make posts about him in the future, so in a nutshell... he seems like a funny and good kid. OH AND WHEN MAI ASKED HIM THE “what can you see but cannot see” RIDDLE AND HE ANSWERED TAKOYAKI BECAUSE YOU CAN SEE THE DOUGH ON THE OUTSIDE BUT NOT THE OCTOPUS ON THE INSIDE? LITERAL CUTEST SHIT EVER KING OF COMEDY I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU. Ahem. Sorry.  

All the people I ship romantically with this character- Weevil Underwood. They’re both teenagers who got famous, let it get to their heads, and then lost everything... considering that they seem like the types of kids who would be bullied relentlessly (they're already constantly being made fun of by mostly of the character anyway), I think the fact that they end up befriending each other is a good sign that they can find some comfort in each other and discover other things to be fulfilled by beside card games. I love how even though this friendship is framed as a begrudging alliance between two self-servings jerks half of the time, the other half of the time it’s about best friends starting a shit together for petty reasons and always being by each other’s side no matter what. The way that they tease each other constantly but then always stand up for one another when others pick on them... it’s so obvious that they actually really care about one another! I just love their dynamic so much it’s unreal, hence the blog.

My non-romantic OTP for this character- Although I primarily think about his relationship with Weevil, there is still a lot of potential to be explored with other characters! Mako is another minor character obsessed with a type of animal, but where’s he differs from Rex and ESPECIALLY Weevil is his sportsmanship, being able to become friends with Yugi and Joey even after being defeated by them. I think that difference mostly comes down to Mako being significantly older than Red and Weevil and therefore having more perspective on gaming fame, so I feel like he would be a great influence on them. On Rex specifically, I think Season 4 missed a big opportunity to expand on Rex and Mai’s relationship. Mai had been a major contributor to Rex losing in Duelist Kingdom, but now they both feel like washed-up failures. I think given the circumstances they could have comeback to an understanding, maybe even have Mai apologize for throwing him under the bus to screw with Joey? I think showing Rex that not everyone who has wronged him in the past had/still has bad intentions would be really good addition to his character arc in Season 4. Then of course there is Joey... to me, the main difference between Rex and Joey is that Joey is stupidly lucky while Rex never seems to catch a break. Otherwise they’re both recklessness dumbasses who prioritize brawn over brain, but Joey is nevertheless able to triumph through sheer dumb luck while Rex gets anihilated over and over with basically the same strategy (minus the RNG cards, Joey’s strategy is just big monsters after all). While the previously mentions she relationships were hypothetical, this dynamic between Joey and Rex is actually given some focus in canon, and I found it very compelling! I only wish this difference between them hadn't only been used to increase Joey’s confidence in his skills as a duelist (which I will remind you is mostly LUCK, no offense to Joey because I do love him BUT I MEAN... only being able to beat Rex because of a lucky Time Wizard isn’t peak strategy ), but to develop Rex’s character somehow as well. 

My unpopular opinion about this character- JUST LIKING THIS CHARACTER IS AN UNPOPULAR OPINION MAN... tons of people hate him so much! I know he isn’t an important character at all but he isn’t nearly as much of a jerk as people make him out to be, and I mean even if he was he’s just a kid! I won’t pretend that he is always portrayed favorably by the narrative, but the fact that some people feel nothing but disdain for a child whose accomplishments were robbed from him by forces outside of his control and who received no sympathy for it, causing his self-worth to deteriorate... it’s a bit concerning to me that so many adults in particular are so disgusted by that. 

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon- I’ve talked QUITE a lot already about things that I wish had happened to develop his character more, but above all else I wish his character arc in Season 4 had been given a proper conclusion. The writers set up this interesting conflict where the insignificant minor characters are upset that they aren’t allowed to be successful when the more important characters aren’t involved and shows the consequences that their defeat had on their lives and self-image... BUT THEN AFTER THEY’RE DEFEATED THEY ARE FORGOTTEN ABOUT FOR THE REST OF THE SEASON UNTIL THEY WAKE UP IN THE HOSPITAL AND INSTANTLY REVERT BACK TO BEING COMIC RELIEF GRRR GRRRRRRRR! There wasn’t no resolution to this arc AT ALL and it drives me UP THE GODDAMN WALL because it absolutely captivated me in concept... but like with many things in Yu-Gi-Oh! the execution was totally ruined :( 

[chaoskirin]

Book Review -- The Heartstrikers Series

This is a book review about the first three books in the Heartstrikers Series, which starts with Nice Dragons Finish Last.

I liked these books, but I didn’t love them. It's definitely a solid three stars, and I'll read the last two books to see where it goes. Overall, if you like fantasy with YA elements, you will probably enjoy this series.

This review will contain some minor spoilers in order to justify my rating, with some MAJOR spoilers at the end.

First, the good. The plot is absolutely solid and it's clear the the author had a good idea of what she was going to do before she wrote it. It has a very mobster-type feel which I would expect with the way the dragons are characterized. The writing is occasionally clever and the main character is likable, relatable, and I'm able to empathize with his situation. The author may be projecting a bit as Julius' situation can get a little heavy-handed, but the theme of a found family is definitely present and well-executed.

I love the world that's been created. I'm originally from Detroit, so it was a pleasant surprise to find that the entire first book takes place in a sort of ghost-town version of it. I can picture the descriptions of the houses (I used to work in an old mansion converted in to an office, in fact!) and it's pretty clear that the author is from Detroit, or at least spent a lot of time there. Sometimes it got a little name-droppy as far as locations were concerned, but I kept hoping the author would namedrop the place where I'm from, so it's a fair trade. XD (She did not, sadly, but it was still fun to read about.)

The spirits and how they exist is also very interesting. Algonquin is an amazing villain in the second ant third books, and I can't wait to read more about her and the other spirits in the last two books.

There's also a great amount of action interspersed with the narrative, so that kept things interesting! Some books tend to either get lost in endless exposition or endless action sequences, but this book balances them very well.

Now for the not-so-good.

I picked up the first book expecting dragons. The title is "Nice Dragons Finish Last," after all, and while it's very clear from the description that the main character, Julius, is "sealed," I had hoped that there would be at least some mythological creature action. This is kept to an absolute minimum, though, in favor of dragons in their human shape. It's even a rather contrived "rule" in Detroit that dragons aren't allowed to be there. This trope has become outright cliche... I've been reading books for years and this was a common theme way back in the days of Dragonlance--take an incredibly powerful being and shove them into human shape, but add a coolness factor by calling them a dragon. (I wrote this part after the first book: there's much more ACTUAL dragon action in books 2 and 3. I still wish there was more.)

But they aren't really dragons. They think like humans, they act like humans, they seem to have the same emotions as humans... Except for another fantasy trope, which is taking every member of a species and shoving them into a single alignment (lawful evil in this case). Julius is the one exception, so it's a very Drizzt Do'urden situation and it's always been odd to me that every member of a species could be evil/good just because of what they are. (this is especially a problem with goblins and rampant antisemitism, but that's another discussion entirely.)

It's a problem that allows justified racism. If the entirety of one species is mean, it's really easy to make everyone hate them, and you lose the nuance of what real racism is. I would suggest that people not write about racism unless they've either experienced it or they've consulted with members of their community who have been the target of it. This becomes more of a problem in the second and third books when Julius is trying to prove that Not All Dragons Are Bad. And it becomes clear that both humans and spirits are very racist against dragons, but it completely lacks the reality of what racism really is. As one poster on tumblr said, "racism isn't just one species being mean to another."

Essentially, it puts all dragons on an uphill battle against everyone else, fails to become a proper allegory, and discards depth and warmth.

A small problem that I should mention is that sometimes plot points sort of fade? There was a situation where Julius' mom visits and he was very mean to Marci, and she was very upset about that, but it's never actually addressed. It sort of fizzles and ends and then everything moves on. It should have at least been mentioned and tied up.

Another problem is repetitiveness or filler text. When I'm going through beta reading for my books, I ask my readers to tell me ANY TIME they skim over text. When your readers are skimming, what you've written isn't interesting, and it has to be changed. I found myself doing this a lot in this book. I forced myself to read back and see what I've skimmed over, and it was usually information I'd already read being presented in a slightly different way. My advice would be to allow the readers to infer information without explaining it into the ground. One thing I would avoid is the discussion of plans before executing said plans--even if they ultimately go wrong. It's enough to say that your protagonist HAS a plan, then let the text speak for itself. These planning phases were what I tended to skip the most.

I can supply one sample of repetitiveness without spoiling the story too badly: One of the main characters is talking with a dragon character about a plan at the beginning-ish of book 3. And breaking the text down to its basics, it goes like this:

Amelia: You have to. Marci: I don't know... Amelia: But you have to. Marci: I don't know... Amelia: You really should do this. Marci: I don't know... Amelia: It's a good idea. Marci: Okay I'll do it. Amelia: Are you sure? Marci: Yes I'll do it. Amelia: Are you sure???

And the argument became VERY spread out over the whole chapter, interspersed with the same explanation of why Marci Should Do The thing, most of which I ended up skimming to the part where Marci ultimately accepted Amelia's idea.

Another chapter I skipped was in book 3 where two human characters had lunch with Marci. And as soon as it became clear they were discussing stuff Marci basically already knew, I just skipped the whole chapter. It was an unnecessary bit of writing that could have been summarized in one or two paragraphs instead. I went back and actually read it later. I didn't miss anything.

(my examples are from the third book because I just finished it and it's the freshest in my mind, but this is an issue in the first two books as well.)

I think there's a certain amount of realism in conversations like this. The problem is that your readers have already figured out where something is going, and they want to get there. If the author reads this, my suggestion would be this: Sometimes it's okay to cut events out when they're uninteresting. If you hate writing it, and your beta readers hate reading it, it can go. I wouldn't follow the advice that you should cut out EVERYTHING irrelevant to the plot, because sometimes it's fun to have fun, but the extra boring tedium can be safely summarized.

Next, Marci.

I first want to state here that my PREFERENCE is writing female characters. Most of my characters are women. And I understand there are a lot of readers who outright dislike all female characters, but I'm not one of them. I feel like that's an important thing to state before going into more detail about my issues with Marci.

I wanted to read more of the series before posting this review, because I felt Marci was a shallow character after book one. She felt like a female character who was STRONG, but NOT a strong female character.

And through the first book, she felt like a prop to the other main character, Julius, instead of a character all her own. (And to be fair, her ENTIRE story from the first book is sort of... hand-waved in books 2 and 3.)

In the first book, Marci isn't really written with a story arc. She's a sort of deus ex machina for Julius; she appears into his life mysteriously as he's looking for a mage, first of all. And while it SEEMS that she does have her own arc, it becomes clear by the end of the story that she's only a catalyst for the dragons' stories. The thing she's protecting eventually ends up in the hands of the dragons; she's essentially just a walking suitcase for them. She's a roadblock for the villains. And there's not even a true explanation of Why She Has The Thing They Want except that it's really cool and she wants it.

This alone may have prevented me from reading the rest of the series, but I'm VERY glad I did--While Marci has a slow start, her story does pick up in the second and third books and she becomes much more likeable. She still feels like a prop at times (other characters refer to her as a "weapon" even) but within that description, she's fighting her own battles and has become much less shallow.

I do wish she had more agency. I wish her decisions truly felt like hers, instead of the manipulations/machinations of those with higher power. But she's not the worst-written female character I've ever read, and the author makes it clear in the second and third books that she knows how to write good female characters (cough chelsie cough) so I can forgive Marci's shortcomings.

There's one Bad thing that I want to address, too, which mostly came up at the end of book 2 and throughout book 3. And this is a fairly major spoiler, I'm sorry.

You don't give a tyrannical dictator power after you defeat her. You just don't. Julius could have banished his mother if he refused to kill her. He could have let someone else kill her. He could have done any number of things. But the first thing he does is give her a seat on the new council and is just like "yes you still get to make decisions." And as you can imagine, this goes very wrong.

And book 3 is FULL of Julius refusing to let his brothers and sisters kill anyone, even when it's justified. This has always been a trope that rankled... You can't write about a coup and then have nobody die. It suggests that genocidal dictators Can Change If You Give Them The Right Opportunities, and we all know from real life that that doesn't happen. Tyrannical people in power will fight to keep that power. They don't learn. And props to the author for showing that these people don't learn, but... seriously, you don't keep people around who actively want to kill you.

I was so annoyed with Julius by the end of book 3, and the hoops the writing had to jump through to show his decision was good and right. He felt naive and almost stupid. And (VERY major spoiler here, just stop reading if you don't want the end of book 3 spoiled!)

...

...

...

...

...

...

Julius' mother had enslaved his sister for hundreds of years. When the sister was released, she immediately tried to kill her mother.

This would have justified ALL of Julius' actions up until that point if he'd just LET HER. Bethesda hurt Chelsie the most out of ANY Of her children. It would have been a PERFECT way to allow Chelsie to get her well-deserved revenge AND end the problem of Bethesda (who REALLY deserves to die.) And Julius made her stop, because That's Not How We're Doing Things Anymore.

I don't like that Bethesda is effectively not paying for the thousands of atrocities she committed over the last thousand years because the main character is a pacifist. It just doesn't sit right. And IDK if the author is building to Bethesda's death in the last couple books or not, but letting Chelsie kill her would have been the PERFECT end, and I'm really disappointed. No end for Bethesda would have been better than that.

Anyway.

As I said at the beginning of this review, I still recommend reading the series. It's a really interesting urban fantasy-type book, and while it crosses into YA territory, the fantasy aspect is interesting enough to keep me reading.

[nunonabun]

I did love Trixie admitting she'd dated a gay man as cover once in that dismissive way she did. Because to her his sexuality didn't mean anything to her, but she didn't want him to be hurt. I know that episode had many other things to take out of it but that stood out to me, along with her saying that what would bother her wouldn't be her partners sexuality, but that they cheated. All that was important was their faithfulness.

This got quite long so I’ll put it under a cut.

This is a heck of an episode, and I think how everyone comes off in it is quite complex. There was a lot I liked about Trixie in that episode, especially her speaking up at the dinner table and saying “Well quite frankly I thought we’d fought a war over facism, and that’s what this is, telling people who they can and can’t love.” But there are also the ways in which she’s still viewing things from a heternormative POV and participating in the “othering” of gay people, as are pretty much all the straight characters in the episode (I am going with Trixie at least self-identifying as straight, in this analysis.)  

When she says she couldn’t forgive Tony Amos’s actions if she were in Marie Amos’ shoes “because [Tony] cheated, I couldn’t care less who with,” that equates him acting on his sexuality outside of his straight marriage, with a straight person in a straight marriage having an affair. It puts the blame for Tony’s affair fully on Tony as opposed to largely on the way heteronormativity and homophobia have forced him into that situation. It’s kind of like an “I don’t see colour,” but with sexuality; a disregard of how the oppression a person faces factors into their actions. That’s not to say it doesn’t truly harm his wife as well, and it��s absolutely fine to empathize with her, but to just say it’s cheating and he’s fully wrong for cheating misunderstands the situation. Phyllis does this too, when Sister Monica Joan says crime implies someone was harmed, and nobody was in that case, Phyllis says “try putting yourself in Mrs. Amos’s shoes,” as though that somehow justifies the punishment Tony is receiving even a bit. It’s a horribly difficult situation and of course it’s valid for someone Marie’s position to feel hurt and deceived, but it’s also important not to ignore how Tony entering that marriage and breaking his vows is not a malicious deception. It’s a situation where he is under immense pressure to conform to a social norm that he would be severely punished if he broke. He’s also very likely to have gotten the message implicitly and/or explicitly that getting married to a woman would “fix” him... and then finding out he can’t repress a natural and important part of himself.  

To the anecdote about the doctor she was a beard for again, it’s complicated. Trixie recounts: ”I certainly don’t mind fraulines. In fact, I provided diversionary cover for one during my training. Young doctor, melting to look at, but the other way inclined. Perfect gentleman, sadly. Without me on his arm, he would have lost his position.” One the one hand, she cared about him and helped him. On the other hand, the way she helped him was by providing the image that he did fit the norm. She helped dress up the closet door to make it look like he wasn’t in there. He probably wouldn’t have wanted her to do anything else. Society forced him into a position where, if he was out, he’d be out of a job. But it is still helping him to cover up and fit the norm as opposed to fighting the norm (Again, I know, he may not have wanted her to do that and certainly outing him to fight against it would likely have been hugely harmful, that’s not where I’m going with this. I’ll get to that in the last section of this little essay thing.) There was also something about how she told the story that was quite othering. The way she told it was as though it were an exciting anecdote, a titillating, somewhat shocking story of complicity with an Other. It wasn’t in a tone of ‘someone I knew experienced a scary, horrible encounter with bigotry and I tried to help.’ That lack of empathetic tone is kind of in line with the use of othering terms like “frauline” and “one [of them],” as well as her response to the same situation existing in nursing (”No dark secrets girls, not if you value your life. *giggles*”). I’m sure other people have other views on that conversation, but that’s how it came across to me. There’s also her conversation with Patsy where Patsy asks if she’s “the only one who doesn’t hate them, the queers,” and Trixie says “I just don’t think it’s our battle to fight,” and then changes the subject to her (straight) relationship and how to get the community to accept the straight wife of a gay man. Essentially, overall her perspective ends up being ‘yes it’s wrong that gay people are treated like that, it’s fascist to punish them for being gay, but they can conform, there’s no need to rock the boat.’ Those things I’ve discussed above are actually elements of the episode I really liked. The words and actions of each of the characters are entirely believable and consistent with who they are in the time and place they’re in. What I enjoy about these things is that I think they demonstrate how, in a homophobic & heteronormative society, even good people, even people who are against homophobia, can perpetuate it, be complicit in it, and participate in othering. Here I’m moving on to a broader reflection. I think the examination with Trixie holds, but a clearer example - and one where much more harm is done - is Patrick. Patrick expresses that “we ought to live and let live,” in his conversation with Shelagh, and he goes to court to speak in Tony’s defence, yet he prescribes chemical castration for Tony. He’s clearly very against punishing Tony for his sexuality, and the laws pressuring him to do so, but that doesn’t erase that he’s complicit in that punishment, in that horrible thing that is being done to Tony. He doesn’t stand up to it. Taking it up many notches from Trixie being a beard, Patrick expresses chemical castration being preferable as it is “more private,” again, providing a way to make a gay person conform. Also, in some ways, he buys into the established medical view of homosexuality at the time, seeming to accept that though it’s unfair Tony is being medically altered, his sexuality boils down to “urges”. He recommends that Tony focus on the joy of his child and basically just try his best to conform, and that will be enough. Another example of that is of course with Fred, looking reluctant and expressing apology for kick Tony out of the Civic Defense Corps but still doing it. I wouldn’t count Peter exactly because he set up the honeytrap and is more than just complicit, though he is also an example of how ingrained social hatred can lead to otherwise good people being cruel and utterly shutting off their compassion and empathy. There are also subtler ways like Shelagh, who seems to sit on the fence about accepting gay people, and others Tony in her language (asking how Tony can be “that way”, and if Patrick has met “many others”). And there’s Sister Julienne steadfastly not offering support and deferring to social views of the time (”a judge will try Mr. Amos, not us”). I’d argue those are forms of participation in homophobia, because not challenging bigotry when it’s presented to you is a form of tacit acceptance. The negative side of the refusal to judge that Sister Julienne is so often lauded for is pretty clear here. As Patsy communicates when she asks “who will [fight the battle for gay equality] then?” in her conversation with Trixie, if people chose to be bystanders to bigotry, how will we truly, meaningfully change society? This episode highlights not only how explicit enforcement of structures of oppression is deeply harmful, but how insidious those views are, present to some degree even in good people and even in those who explicitly reject it; how its subtler forms are still harmful, and how “tolerance” of the group being othered is still complicity in the oppression. I mean, I think that’s quite undercut but the whole ‘rat cull’ parallel subplot that communicates ‘it’s alright not to like them for their identity so long as you acknowledge their right to exist,’ but if I disregard that and just focus on the gay plot, that’s what I get.

  Anyways, sorry, my thoughts ran away with me there, I have lots of thoughts and feelings about CtM 4x03. Not at all trying to rain on your reading of it, anon, different readings/aspects of a thing can stand out/be meaningful to different people, and I definitely agree Trixie has some strong moments. But I think it’s also interesting to look at the variety of ways homophobia & heteronormativity are present in people and are presented. And of course, those themes and messages are all too important in our present world as well.

[cloudbatcave]

Back in Unova we go!

My first gripe is the Skyarrow Bridge, which connects Nacrene (the town that had the museum Plasma stole from, prompting me to be press-ganged to chase them) to Castelia (the new york city ripoff of the game).

It’s pretty! It’s cool in concept! It’s Nintendo holding it up with trembling hands and going “look, ma, I can do 3D now! Sort of!”

Iit’s a giant pain in the ass to get through as it takes at least a minute of keeping your finger on the B button to run across.

Normally I wouldn’t even have cared, so let’s rewind a bit to why I do.

So I finished kicking the shit out of Plasma, nothing notable there except that I kept getting jumped by ranger trainers who gave me berries like the weird hippies they are.

I nonchalantly jumped over a ridge to get out of the forest…only to realize I had trapped myself between that ridge (which, for those blissfully not in the know, cannot be jumped back over because in pokemon games they only work one way) and the rest of the trainers on the non-forest part of the route I hadn’t fought yet because I had been busy with the game’s resident brainwashed multitude of cosplaying weirdos.

This was an issue because at this point in the game, I do not have much money, and I had only been able to afford so many potions, most of which I had used to heal while either fighting trainers or wild pokemon. My guys were wiped, and several fights stood between me and the Nacrene pokemon center.

So that meant I had to trundle my ass toward the end of the route, take the bridge to Castelia, go to ITS pokemon center, and THEN go back and finish off the other trainers before turning right around again.

It’s especially galling considering that gen 5 has an NPC that will heal you…in the other part of the forest. But not, you know, where it would be actually helpful during the game’s plot portion.

On the more amusing side of things, it’s always funny to see how dumb Plasma is. When I beat up the last of them, one of the seven sages showed up and talked about how the skull they stole wasn’t the pokemon they were looking for anyway.

Who saw that coming?? It was obviously a dragonite skull, not a legendary. I just…it’s such a dumb excuse to have this plot bit. The writing for Team Plasma is so poor.

Picking up in Castelia, I walk around exploring that and meet some folks.

“Working women are beautiful, and battling pokemon is wonderful!” This chick knows where it’s at.

“Being healthy’s the best, because when you’re healthy you can do anything!”

You’re not wrong, random man, but I hope you don’t say this to just anyone who passes by because I feel it’s a tad insensitive to say to...literally anyone who isn’t the pinnacle of health.

“When my thrown poke ball rocks three times and I hear that great “click”…There are many things in my life that bring me joy!”

Can we not all relate? Good content, A+.

“Strength is not in the size of a body, it’s in the size of a heart!”

I mean…strength is in a heart, literally and metaphorically? It is also in the size of a body. Both are true, random old docks man.

“That black boat…what could it be?”

The people of Unova are not very genre savvy at the best of times.

It isn’t very open-minded to judge someone by the color of their boat, but given this is pokemon, you’d be justified in preemptively setting it on fire to deter the Obviously Evil People who own it.

I innocently walk down a street and then Fuckface Glassesdick pops out of the gym at me like the world’s worst whack-a-mole.

“Hey, Chirae. I just challenged Burgh. He’s a seasoned Gym Leader. He made me work for that badge!”

Post it on your twitter, Cheren, because your 1.5 followers and a shoelace care more than I do.

“But for me, bug-type pokemon aren’t much of a challenge.”

Look at the big man in town, not intimidated by the pokemon type that has three weaknesses and five types that resist it. Very brave.

“I’m going to keep winning like this against all of the Unova region’s Gym Leaders!”

Sorry, what was that? I tuned out because I was imagining literally anything else but you talking.

“Then, I’ll head for the Pokemon League and outperform the champion!”

No one likes Alder, and yet, somehow, I feel you would be an even worse replacement because you don’t even have cool hair to make you slightly less intolerable.

“If I do that, everyone will admit what a strong Trainer I am…”

I would rather be fed live slugs.

“That will make feel truly alive…”

Am I being paid for this therapy session? I deserve compensation for the tedium being forcibly shoved down my earholes right now.

Oh thank god he finally walked away.

And then Burgh makes an entrance, naturally.

“Ah hah! You’re the one who fought Team Plasma in the Pinwheel Forest…”

Yeah dude that happened like, yesterday. You don’t need to announce it. I remember. I was there.

“If I remember, your name is…Chirae!”

I honestly do not give a fuck if you remember my name, as I intend on forgetting yours after I get your badge.

“Come to challenge the gym, I suppose?”

What gave it away? Was it me standing outside the gym looking like I really wanted to hit a smug prick with glasses and dark hair?

“Aww. Sorry, but could you wait a bit?”

You’re going to give me a fetch quest, aren’t you.

“I was informed that Team Plasma has shown up!”

EVEN WORSE. Yet again I ask where the fucking police are. We’re not in artsy fartsy town anymore, Castelia is a whole-ass city. Why in god’s name is there not some way of keeping the peace that isn’t random trainers?

“In fact…Come with me! I’m going to the dock at Prime Pier!”

Who writes the child labor laws in unova? Monkeys?

also I have not finished ambling around the city yet and that is incredibly more important than this travesty of a plot so Burgh gets to wait on me now.

and he zips off into the night, just assuming I know where he’s headed in this city I literally only arrived in today.

[the-desolated-quill]

Rosa - Doctor Who blog

(SPOILER WARNING: The following is an in-depth critical analysis. If you haven’t seen this episode yet, you may want to before reading this review)

It comes as a massive relief to say that I really enjoyed this episode. There are a number of ways Rosa could have gone wrong and while Chris Chibnall has managed to crank out two surprisingly good Doctor Who episodes so far, it’s hard to shake off old fears. Oh my God, I thought to myself, a historical episode about Rosa Parks and the Black Civil Rights Movement. Is Chibnall biting off more than he can chew? 

Thankfully Chibnall had the good sense to hire a co-writer that can keep his white privilege in check. Malorie Blackman. Author of the critically acclaimed Noughts and Crosses series of books depicting an alternative reality where Africans developed a technological advantage over Europeans and where white people are segregated under this world’s version of the Jim Crow laws. It’s safe to say that Blackman knows a thing or two about exploring racism and, being a black woman, she’s much more qualified to talk about issues of race and to represent Rosa Parks and the Civil Rights Movement as a whole than Chibnall is. The result is, without a shadow of a doubt, some of the best Doctor Who I’ve seen in years.

One thing I’m glad about is the way Rosa Parks is depicted. Historical stories (particularly New Who historical stories) have an unfortunate tendency to go completely over the top with it. It’s just not enough to have a character who played a significant part in human history. Oh no. They’ve also got to be the specialist, most important person in the whole wide universe. The result is that we’re often left with a wafer thin episode that completely romanticises the period of history the story is trying to depict, waters down all the more complicated and unsavoury parts of the historical setting and turns the famous historical figure into a shallow caricature of themselves (see Agatha Christie in Unicorn And The Wasp, Winston Churchill in Victory Of The Daleks and Vincent Van Gogh in Vincent And The Doctor). Rosa, thankfully, doesn’t fall into the same trap. Rosa Parks isn’t treated as a god among mortals. She’s treated like an ordinary person, thus making her actions that much more powerful.

Vinette Robinson (who appeared in a previous Chibnall penned story 42) does an incredible job playing Rosa Parks. Again, more emphasis is placed on how ordinary she is rather than how historically significant. Nowadays we of course view her as the genesis of the Black Civil Rights Movement and she has rightly been praised and immortalised for that, but it’s easy to forget that she was a real person behind the legacy, which is what the episode really delves into. We get to see her fear, sadness and frustration in this oppressive society. And it really brings home how mundane her actions really are. Sure we can see from hindsight how her actions would influence others and change the course of history, but she wasn’t some heroic freedom fighter taking a stand. She was a woman who just wanted to sit down on a bus after a hard day at work. And the fact that she, Martin Luther King and other black people actually had to fight for the right to do something so trivial is utterly ridiculous.

Some have criticised the episode saying that this is too heavy a subject matter to deal with at 7pm on a Sunday evening. I couldn’t disagree more. For one thing, this isn’t the first time Doctor Who has handled difficult subject matters (Nazism and genocide have frequently cropped up in past stories after all). But I think the criticism mostly stems from people (white people) being left feeling uncomfortable by the story and are trying to avoid having a serious conversation about it NRA style, claiming that this isn’t the right time for it. Well... when is it the right time? Nobody wants to have this conversation, sure, but we’ve still got to have it. And as uncomfortable viewing as it is, it’s important that it is not sugar-coated and that we’re reminded of how difficult things were for non-white people so that shit like this never happens again. So no, I didn’t think the use of violence against black people or racially charged language up to and including the n word were inappropriate. It was an accurate depiction of the environment at the time and if you felt uncomfortable by that, then congratulations, that’s precisely what you’re supposed to feel.

In fact I honestly thought the episode’s depiction of violence against black people was quite restrained, making the acts of discrimination that much more despicable in my eyes. Using gratuitous violence would have been a cheap shot and Chibnall and Blackman mercifully avoid that route. What makes the episode so chilling to watch isn’t the things that white people do, but rather the oppressive atmosphere they create. It’s not the arrogant tosspot slapping Ryan across the face for touching his wife’s glove that had me on edge. It was the scene after that where everyone is just silently staring at the TARDIS crew in the cafe that really made me feel queasy. The threat is implied, yet constant, which is infinitely scarier. After the likes of Steven Moffat and Mark Gatiss boasting about how their episodes were going to be ‘the scariest Doctor Who stories ever’ only for them to amount to a hodge-podge of tired horror cliches and a dumb monster going ‘boo’, it’s a relief to see writers take a more subtle ‘less is more’ approach. I’m sorry, but the bus driver glaring angrily at Rosa is much more terrifying than a Weeping Angel. Period.

Which brings me to Krasko, played with smug charm by Joshua Bowman who succeeds at making you want to reach through the screen and punch his racist face repeatedly. Again, some have criticised the episode for its ‘one dimensional villain’ and, again, it only seems to be white people making this criticism. Not to make sweeping generalisations here, but non-white fans seem to be largely happy with how Krasko was written and depicted, probably because they’ve had to deal with pricks like him at least once in their lives. I’m guessing the source of the criticism comes from him not having a backstory or concrete motivation other than he hates black people. But my response to that is... does he really need one? Would Krasko have really been a more interesting character if it was revealed that he was bullied in school or a black kid had stolen his My Little Pony lunchbox? Does there really need to be a reason for why he hates black people and wants to ‘put them in their place’? I would have thought him being a racist white person would have been enough reason to hate him frankly. Let’s not forget what happened when Star Wars and Marvel respectively gave their villains Kylo Ren and Kilgrave tragic backstories to provide context for their despicable actions, at which point the fans proceeded to romanticise the fuck out of them, calling them misunderstood. Maybe (and this is just my opinion) giving Krasko a backstory wouldn’t have made him more interesting, but instead would have been seen as an attempt to justify and excuse his shitty behaviour, and maybe, just maybe, we’re better off without one. Just a thought.

Besides, it’s not as if we don’t learn anything about Krasko. We’re given enough information to work with. He’s a time traveller from the future. He was put in prison for murdering two thousand people (quick side note, did anyone else laugh when the Doctor said the Stormcage was the most secure prison in the universe? Remind me, how many times did River Song break out again?). He’s clearly intelligent, as demonstrated by him coming up with a non-violent plan to ruin the lives of generations of non-white people in order to circumvent his neural inhibitors. While it’s never overtly mentioned, he’s clearly some future version of the alt-right and is there to act as an extension of the true villain of the story. Because that’s the thing the people criticising his character have overlooked. Krasko isn’t the villain. White people are. The society Rosa Parks lives in is the true villain. Krasko is there not just to get to the plot going, but also to subtly demonstrate that while things do get better for non-white citizens, there will always be that racist element within our society. Hell, Ryan and Yasmin even spell it out for you in their conversation whilst hiding from the police. While people like Rosa Parks and Martin Luther King made a huge impact and helped change things for the better, racism and prejudice hasn’t just magically gone away. It’s still around. There are still people who cling on to these extremist and bigoted views. Some might argue that racism has become so entrenched in Western society that it will never fully go away. That there will always be some remnant hanging around. That’s what Krasko represents. So if you thought he was a rubbish villain because he had ‘no backstory or motivation’ then I’m afraid you’ve completely missed the point.

I should also applaud Chibnall and Blackman for resisting the urge to shove in some pointless alien like other historicals have. Not only would that have distracted from Rosa’s story, the racist white people are scary enough thank you very much. While there are sci-fi elements in here, the episode quite rightfully focuses on people.

Speaking of people, let’s talk about the TARDIS crew. Yeah! They’re in this episode too! Haven’t really talked about them much, have I? The Doctor largely takes a backseat in this one, which I know some people have a problem with, but I think it was the right thing to do. We don’t want an alien white woman coming in and stealing Rosa Parks’ glory. Jodie Whittaker graciously lets Vinette Robinson take centre stage while she busies herself with other things like confronting and intimidating Krasko and organising fake raffles with Frank Sinatra. I really like the balance they’ve struck between light and dark with this Doctor (something Moffat tried to do with Peter Capaldi’s Doctor and failed at miserably). She’s funny, compassionate and caring, but there’s a little bit of Sylvester McCoy’s devious cunning in there too, which really comes to the forefront here. Did anyone else find it really disconcerting seeing the Doctor try to maintain history? Influencing events so that Rosa Parks had no choice, but to give up (or refuse to give up) her seat. While we know she’s doing it for the right reasons, in order to keep black history in check, she’s still nonetheless actively contributing to Rosa’s misery, which is actually a clever way of exploring how white people all contribute to a racist status quo, directly, indirectly, intentionally and unintentionally. And of course it all culminates in the Doctor and co refusing to give up their seats in order to keep history intact. The look on Thirteen’s face as events unfold says it all. The look of sheer sadness and self loathing, knowing she played a part in this, is haunting. Same goes for Graham’s realisation. The widower of a black woman and step-grandfather to a black teenager being forced to contribute to this racist institution is utterly heartbreaking.

But the standout of the main cast has to be Ryan. Tosin Cole truly shines in this episode, giving an incredibly powerful and moving performance. This in many ways is his episode as he comes face to face with the racist prejudices of the time period and Cole rises to the occasion. My favourite scene has to be when Ryan talks with Rosa, thanking her for everything she will do in the future and promising that things will get better. It’s incredibly emotional and I actually started tearing up with him. I’m also so happy that he was the one that got to beat Krasko at the end rather than the Doctor. I stood up and cheered. And his reaction to seeing Martin Luther King has got to be one of the most charming moments of the series so far.

Rosa is unquestionably one of the strongest episodes in all of Doctor Who. It’s incredibly well written and performed and it’s extremely powerful as well as being very subtle and nuanced. What’s more, I’m now completely sold on Chris Chibnall being the showrunner. Any lingering doubts I’ve may have had are now completely evaporated after this episode. Rosa proves that not only does Chibnall respect and value diversity both in front of and behind the camera, but that he’s also committed to creating something truly special with his tenure, using the Doctor Who format to explore hard hitting and difficult subject matters with care and respect. Truly excellent television.

[the-energon-hole]

Hello, hello!! Would it be alright to make a request? Headcanons for the rescue bots (Heatwave, Chase, Boulder, Blades) being reunited with their cybertronian s/o (sparkmate? I don’t really know the right vocabulary- sorry!!) from waaay back in the day?

((A/N Ok this was actually a lot of fun to write and I got very carried away with the idea, I had to stop myself from writing 4 seraperate fics for this idea lol.

I’m adding this ask to my favorites on my Masterlist Page, because I might revisit this idea later if I am feeling inspired to write about Rescue Bots))

Heatwave

-Once he had his new assignment on Earth, he was so preoccupied with his research and work here on Griffin Rock that he never really thought of you all that much. It wasn’t out of malice or discontent, things were just moving so very fast since emerging from stasis that the never really had time anymore time to really think about the past. It wasn’t until you appeared in his normally quiet and empty recharge thoughts that he felt that pang of emptiness inside of his chest, his spark was aching with how much he realised he missed you. Primus, it has been so long since he saw you, it was even cycles before they went into space on the Sigma that he last saw your sparkling and soft faceplate smiling up at him before he left to start his shift rotation around the colonies near Cybertron. How long had it really been? He hasn’t calculated the day and night cycle, mixed in with the time it took to get here, plus the extra time they were into forced sleep mode- were you ok? He had read some reports when he had the time after his realization that it said some bots were drafted to fight in the war against the Decepticons- oh Primus, what if you were drafted?! You didn’t know how to fight all that well! You weren’t trained for it… Were you still even alive? His fuel tanks twisted as he felt his early morning energon try to come back up as bile from the pit of his abdomen.

-After everyone in the family noticed how sloppy and skittish Heatwave was, and it wasn’t because Kade has said or done something to him, that everyone decided to pry into his life to see what was wrong with their normally ever so confident leader. After Heatwave felt like he was attacked enough from this mock intervention, he spilled about how his absent sparkmate was starting to affect him more than he was willing to admit. The rest of the bots understood with sympathetic looks and words, but the Burns family didn’t understand the gravity of how he was being affected- he had them at least, wasn’t that enough to make him feel whole again? It took a lot of explaining on the bot’s part to let the relatively small family know that it was different than the simple human tradition of marriage- you are literally bonded with the other bot, they have a part of your spark and you have a part of them. They justified that Heatwave had a reason to feel this way, and they too were concerned when he sighed and rubbed at his chest confessing that he couldn’t tell if you were even alive or not, it had been so long since the two of you bonded that the signal was incredibly weak, almost nonexistent- and it hurt him so much to admit that.

-He tried to work past the pain and emptiness he felt, but it was slowly interfering with his work to the point he was to afraid to do anything- he didn’t want to endanger other people’s lives just because he was feeling bad. It was months that he was down for the count until a  surprise visit from Optimus just reminded him of how low he had actually sunk- he was probably going to get sent away because he isn’t competent enough to do his job and lead his team to victory. He heard a small voice that made his energon run cold in his cables, and as you walked into the room still just as stunning as he remembered, he almost cried as you began to become emotional as well- you were always the kind of bot ot wear your spark out in the open. You basically tackled him as he embraced you with an extra tight squeeze- you were real! You were alive! Primus had mercy on his spark, as all of that empty loneliness just melted away into nothing as feelings of warmth and passion replaced his once aching crackling spark. Oh, there was plenty of time to bond later, for now he had so much to show you- there was so much catching up to do! You bet that he refused to let you go anywhere without him for awhile, he was never leaving your side ever again- he will take you on missions now even if he has to!

Chase

-It was just another normal day for Chase, he was going through old public records and taking notes in order to keep both himself and his team mates up to speed with what was going on in Cybertronian news. He has read about the war, the fall of the council, and the destruction of their homeworld. He was just browsing through public record when he came across a name that he had not seen in such a long time that it made his hands shake a little in fear. That headline read “Newest Recruit Single Handedly Takes out Decepticon Strike Team”- you were that recruit in the holo/photo, that was definitely you. He would recognize that silly little lopsided grin anywhere. This article was old, cycles old from the beginning of this war, and he couldn’t help but frantically search your name in the computers to see if anything else would pop up about you. A few things turned up “Recruit Promoted to Scout”, “Scout Promoted to Warrior”, and “Warrior Promoted to Commander”. You were busy it would seem, and he beamed as he noticed that you were busy fighting the good fight against the forces of evil who wished to do harm to the innocent civilians who just wanted to live simple and free lives.

-True, the two of you never officially bonded, but it got really close to iot. You both were very goal oriented, and both of you were trying very hard to raise in the ranks of your chosen fields. The time you two spent together was wonderful, full of enlightening and education conversations about old philosophies and new laws. You were always so smart and charming, it was easy to fall for how witty you were- and just knowing you were a successful Commander in the Autobot forces, it just gave his spark all kinds of gushy mushy feelings he didn’t know how to describe. He became a little frantic once he realized your last login date was quite a few cycles ago, and you were not the type of bot to make any kind of clerical mistakes, so he sent word out to other survivors and colonies to keep an eye out for you- maybe you were undercover or maybe you didn’t survive the last raid the Decepticons threw at you and your squad. He just had to know, and until he did, he was afraid he was going to be driven mad with curiosity and another feeling that managed to squirm its way into his spark- revitalized love.

-He never let his work slip, he wasn’t that kind of mech to make other suffer because he was plagued by a surprisingly painful and lonely spark. He never thought of himself to be a passionate and loving mech, so much as he thought of himself to be more of a level headed and interesting lover, but really you were the only one that could tell him that. He continued his normal combing through the archives as he always does, making sure to keep up to date with all the public data files that he could- when he noticed a small ping from a personal channel he didn’t recognize. It was a simple message, but one he knew came from you- Breaker, breaker, I’ve gone in for a service and will report in later. It was a saying you two would joke about because of how often he got himself hurt in his line of work- he was always having to go in for service on his frame. His spark finally let him relax as he knew you would contact him again when you got the chance, you were obviously busy doing all you can do dole out justice to the ne'er do wells who would do anything for a sick thrill. You were so perfect that he can feel his spark swell with pride and love- maybe you two can finally bond once all of your important work was complete.

Boulder

-He never stopped thinking about you- not when he was ushered into forced stasis, not when he was assigned to be Graham’s partner here on Earth, and not when he was learning and growing as his own bot away from you. He was worried immensely about you, but he could still feel you resonating within him even after all of these cycles apart, your bond never broke and it never wavered. You both have been friends since you were younglings in the youth sector, and your friendship only grew stronger when you two were training to be become a rescue bot at the academy. You two had bonded in secret, as it was easier than making a big deal out of it with a ceremony and a grand profession of love, you both were not into the whole fuss of sharing your love with the world thing. You loved each other, and that was enough to solidify your relationship so strongly that you can feel what Boulder feels, and you were glad that he was happy with his new assignment on Earth. He can feel your happiness as well, and you couldn’t help but let a little loneliness and longing seep through the bond as well. You felt his amusement and also let you know he was feeling the distance as well, but the work each of you were doing was very important and that both of you had others relying on you to stay sharp and ready to work.

-Your love life was always a private affair, and even now, you can feel how much he loves you even though you were galaxies away. You have been criticized for not flaunting your bond as others around you do, and they are beginning to mistake your silent passion for pretentious secrecy, but that couldn’t be farther from the truth, you just simply were not comfortable blaring your happiness for other to be envious of, as you had more sympathy for those who have lost their bonds because of this disgusting war that it almost felt insulting to boast about how your sparkmate was and that he was alive and serving a cushy job on Earth while the rest of you had to suffer in small colonies that lacked resources and housing. Once this conflict is over, maybe the luck of the Cybertronians will turn around, but until then you and Boulder were perfectly content silently loving one another from afar- because as long as you brother were happy, no one else’s opinions really mattered.-You were lucky enough to be given the opportunity to test out the new space bridge program that was meant to reconnect the remote colonies, the main hub on Cybertron, and the new smaller settlement on the planet Earth. It was a step in the right direction, as a lot of people here in the colonies were suffering from lack of energon and lack of proper medical care, and as a member of the few remaining Rescue Bots, it was your duty to make sure everything would go off without a hitch.The space bridge test went off without any kind of problems, ands you were once again reunited with Bouler for the first time in so many cycles. Nothing Happened beyond a little hugging and raving about how lovely it was to see each other again in a physical way rather than just convey feelings through your warm bond, and that you couldn’t wait to just sit and talk under the warm Earth sun surrounded by such lush and green plant life- it was the perfect way to reminisce about the old times while talking about all the new things you have learned from your time apart. A wonderfully romantic idea that made you both swell with romantic affection that left you both cuddling and laughing the way you used to before he went off on that mission all those years ago.

Blades

-He began to break down once all of the fuss of being reassigned by Optimus Prime was settled and he was secluded away with the other bots as the humans slept in the house above their new base of operations. That empty feeling inside of his very soul, he didn’t know what to do! You would know what to do! You always knew what to do, you were always there to pick him up and help him compose back together whenever he would fall apart from all the stress in his life. You were the only bot in the world that understood him, and he was a confused and anxious mess without you there to guide the way for him. He was being forced into being an aircraft, a helicopter, he hated flying! His spark pulsed in sadness as he couldn’t find any remnants of your bond that he could cling to- it’s been so long since you bonded last… What if you’ve moved on to someone better than him?? It was almost impossible to do that, but you were so amazing and cool under pressure that he as sure you could do anything you set your processor to. He was a weeping mess when Boulder found him, and the gentlest of the Rescue Bots offered his comfort but he couldn’t offer any kind of relief for his anxious spark, as Blades insisted the thing was going to jump out of his chest and steal the space ship so it can find it’s one true match wherever you were in the vast emptiness of space. It took a lot of talking and venting and ideas slinging to get Blades to become coherent enough for him to tell the others who he was looking for so they can put word out in case you were still floating around somewhere.

-You were a beat cop on Cybertron, and  you were so good at taking down bad guys that he wouldn’t be surprised that you might have ended up a soldier in the war that ravaged their homeworld. Oh, he could talk about you all day and night if he was given the chance- he worshiped you for who you were, and he always felt so blessed that he was bonded with someone who was so intimidating and tough but also soft and kind enough to never make him feel like you were any less than him. A lot of other bots would pick on him for being weak and small, but you were always there to stand up for him and comfort him whenever someone crossed a line in his book. There wasn’t any word on your wearabouts yet, but everyone was making sure to fill Blade’s time as much as they could to keep him distracted from the painful pulsing that is going on in his chest- they were all sympathetic to the young and fragile bot. He was happy they all cared about him enough to fill his time so he isn’t to anxious and turn into a blubbering sobbing mess, but he can’t help but get a little achy anytime Dani suggest they watch some kind of romance movie, as all of the characters jute reminded him of how much he ached for you. He missed how you would cradle him against you as you would just make all of his insecurities and fears go away- he has been having to face so many scary things, he was proud of himself, but he craved the comforting and validating touch you offered to him whenever he needed it. Oh Primus, did he ever need it.

-You landed in the middle of an uninhabited island in the middle of what seemed like a planet full of nothing but endless amounts of water. Your ship was damaged while you were pursuing a run away Decepticon criminal in this remote section of the galaxy, and you turned on your encrypted Autobot distress signal, you can’t help but feel like you were closer than ever to someone whom you have been searching for since he disappeared so long ago. You had to put your search on hold when some of the reaming resistance groups needed help keeping peace in their small villages and colonies- which was another reason you were out so far away from everyone. YOu need energon, you need to catch the bad guy, and you needed repairs to your small ship- but that had to wait, you could hear footsteps coming in your direction so yu hid in the shadows of the thick trees to await who was answering your signal. It wasn’t a trap, but it was a group of bots you didn’t recognize, so it was safe to assume they were hostile. You emerged with blasters pointing at them while they surrendered by throwing their arms up in the air, but that was when you were thrown to the ground by someone you never thought you would see again. Blades clung to you as you sat up from where he tackled you to the ground, he was crying and whining out your name as he nearly broke you in half in his tight grip, you just laughed and shushed him while stroking his back a little. That fugitive can wait, you had someone more important that needed your immediate attention, and by the looks of his emotional state he really did need someone to hold him for awhile.

(04/29/18)

[fromthecityofray]

Liberalism: The Religion of the Twenty-First Century - Mohammed Hijab

Here's a link to the lecture Mohammed Hijab, a known Sunni evangelist, gave on 26 April 2019 at VU University in Amsterdam. This is #1 to show that there are Islamic evangelists and scholars we can have reasonable debates with, even if we completely disagree with them, and #2 to show off a bit. There's a long list of my snarcy comments below the video. (I will put them also here in case the administators decide they don't like them).

Liberalism: The Religion of the Twenty-First​ Century - Mohammed Hijab

5:00 - Suffering and happiness, not pain and pleasure. The words matter here. What Mohammed uses brings connotations that we all just want to drug ourselves to death, when instead it's about creating an environment where everyone feels safe and can live their life in peace.

8:00 - We are born equal in that we are human. We have the same rights. Of course in practice we are inequal, but that's the thing - we try to minimize those inequalities as much as practically possible through science and wealth redistribution.

12:00 - Yes. We believe that we as a society, through discussions and elections, can decide what's the best for us - or at least do it better than anyone else. And the same works on the individual level: the individual rights by default are more important than the society. Since we live in a society, our individual rights have to take the second place sometimes, but then it has to very well justified. And we have to be able to discuss those cases and revert them if needed. It seems to me to be a pretty good belief, in contrast with many religious beliefs which are much harsher, and there can't be no discussion about them.

21:00 - Ah, right, incest. Homosexuality is wrong because, err, because what about incest?! Interesting that Mohammed throws this argument (and he does it often) as if it actually proves anything. Incest might not be the best thing ever, but yes - if there's no harm done, and everyone involved gives consent, it shouldn't be illegal. Even if we, other people, don't like it. It's just not our business.

24:30 - If you were born Muslim, do you have to be a Muslim? No. But do you have to stop being a Muslim then? Also no. Do you know why? Because a liberal society is okay with your individual choices.

25:40 - Why two sisters having sex shouldn't be called sex? That's an interesting slip of tongue. And again, that's not an argument. None of these activities should be illegal.

26:45 - Those morals are verified in that they result in more people being happier.

27:00 - Yes. Let's ask about it.

29:00 - Yes, human rights is a fairly recent concept. We progress, we learn new things, and we give names to them. Nothing wrong with that. It's "made up" just us Islam is made up.

33:20 - "State of nature"? Shouldn't it be "the people"? I guess Mohammed here talks about a term used in some older texts, but this is not how we talk about it today. The government has power because we all agreed to live under certain rules, and according to those rules we elected the government.

35:00 - Yes, you do consent by living in the given society while the society allows you to leave if you want. Unlike in Islam which you can't leave.

37:00 - No. There is no sovereign/people dychotomy. The people are the sovereign. We make a contract with each other. There's no monster, no sci-fi creature. Mohammed creates a strawman and then bravely fights with it.

39:50 - As before, sometimes rights of an individual must be compromised, but when it is, there has to be a good reason for it, and we as the society have to be able to change it if we decide so. This is exactly why you can give this lecture and don't have to fear for your safety, Mohammed.

40:50 - Kant is not really that important and we don't have to view his opinions as the law. In fact, we don't. It would really make more sense to talk about the actual modern liberalism instead of strawmaning it like that.

42:10 - In theory, it is possible for such a law to exist. In practice, in liberal democracies such laws are far less common than in countries ruled by religion. We value human life and we seek consent when possible. And no, killing children is a crime.

45:49 - This is an amazing feat of putting the issue on its head. The argument is that because Jews lived in a theocracy therefore apostasy was punishable. Mohammed derives from that that apostasy can be punishable in the modern liberal democracy. To be clear: it can't be. It can't be exactly because we live in a liberal democracy, not a theocracy.

46:50 - Yes, I can and I do. Liberalism is against anti-apostasy law. Mohammed takes things out of context and puts them together in a very shaky construct. Besides, in the same time he wants to convince us that human rights are wrong. Sorry, Mohammed. You can't have a cookie and eat it.

47:25 - aww, a bit antisemity, aren't we...

47:40 - soooo, if we take one bit of liberalism out of liberalism and put into a very unliberal context, and wave our hands a bit, then we can blame the whole liberalism... interesting.

49:40 - "could be", "has been", but it's not. Treason is not punishable by death in modern times in liberal democracies. Besides, and this is more important, a religion is not a monopoly of the state in liberal democracies, so apostasy is not a treason. This is by definition a thing in theocracy, which is by definition not a liberal democracy. The whole Mohammed's argument is based on this misconception. And on the idea that very biiiiig "could be" is the same as "is" in Islam.

50:30 - And it was wrong and we condemn it. People who did it should stand trial. What happened was against the law. And that's the thing.

51:30 - This is sophistry. I still didn't hear any argument supporting anti-apostasy laws, and at this point I'm afraid I won't. Mohammed will just go in circles, cherry-picking definitions until he'll come to some absurd conclusion, that apostasy is the same as killing a child or something.

53:20 - ... and two verses later we learn that if we don't become Muslims, we'll be tortured in hell for eternity.

54:45 - Oh, thank you Sir, that you don't say "kill that ex-Muslim", at least not in western countries. This is so kind of you.

56:45 - Cool. The problem is, in liberal democracies "the contract" tends to be much more "liberal", than in countries where the law is based on sharia. The practice is what is important here, not the theory, because people live in the real world, not in abstractions.

58:00 - Liberalism is better than Islam because it makes more people happier and less people suffering. You don't have to be like us in everything, but if you were more liberal, that would make the world a better place for everyone, including you.

1:00:00 - Hold our beer.

1:00:30 - And we have the Murphy's Law. Liberalism is wrong because Hitler.

1:02:30 - Geert Wilders is not a liberal. He's a far-right scum. Yes, Muslims in liberal countries should have every right to be Muslims. Don't make it into argument against liberalism. Liberalism is on your side in this. If Europe was not liberal, but like Geert Wilders wants it to be, you wouldn't like it at all. Don't make it easier for him.

[scrambledgegs]

Dead Kids

     Filipino indie film, Dead Kids is more than your stereotypical coming-of-aged type of movie. The film centralizes around a group of middle to upper class, private high school students who conspire together and hatch an amateur plan to kidnap the resident school bully. By kidnapping him and holding him for ransom for Php 30 Million, they will be able to kill two birds with one stone – get even and teach their tormentor a lasting lesson, and secondly, get their hands on a hefty sum of money for personal reasons.

  In this respect, only one of the kidnappers seemed to have “the most valid reason” because unlike the other students in the private school, he is the only scholar and in “real” need of money to pay for college and other basic necessities. In fact, he resorts to various “rackets” just to keep financially afloat. He is constantly marginalized and unaccepted by his peers at school. This aspect of the movie also highlights social divides that plagues the Philippines as well, and is exacerbated by growing issues of entitlement among the wealthy and privileged.

As the movie unfolds, as expected, the group collectively bungle the kidnapping operations; they destroy families, dreams and lives. The movie is both comedic and tragic – which is why it really resonated with me. It is very real.

    What struck me the most was the formulation and execution of the whole plan – the scenes and dialogue hit close to home. I recalled my younger school-kid self, as well as my peers back in the day. We conversed very similarly, in a mix of Tagalog and English and used slang words. We also had the same, typical encompassing adolescent problems, the usual things like – school, grades, barkada, relationships, peer pressure, gimikan and yes, vices.

     The dark and stark difference however is that these kids are beyond your average group; they are quite scary. They are made of different stuff – they are very much alive, but at a young age, already seem dead inside, devoid of morals and values. To even think about kidnapping a classmate is one thing, but to actually have the resolve to execute the plan is really frightening. At one point, you will feel sorry for the kidnapped bully, despite what he has done to them individually in the past scenes. Adults are also hardly present in the movie. It is as though these kids live in a warped world with no authority and supervision. Mind you, this movie is based on actual events that transpired in 2018 among university students in Manila. The movie will really make you think about then and now, and the factors which are pushing our youth over the edge.

The Age of the Internet of things: Anxiety, Depression, Violence and Envy

    Dead Kids touched on many prevailing themes faced by our generation today – specifically by Millennials and now the Generation Z (Gen Z). Over and over again in the movie, social media was shown to play a disastrous effect on the psyche of these kids, mirroring what is happening in real life today. At a click of a button and swipe of fingertips, everyone knows what everyone else is doing because of social media, and that makes people compare themselves to others. This continuous, 24/7 exposure breeds anxiety, depression and envy – especially for young people who are unable to compartmentalize or differentiate social media lives from reality. Affected young people feel like they are just not good enough, as compared with for example: a classmate who has topped the class with the highest grades, or their athletic friend who has won a championship title, or another colleague who possesses the latest designer clothes, or an affluent friend who recently took a trip to Europe over summer vacation. They want to achieve or get their hands on the same things as quickly as they could, so that they too can post and boast about it online. Social media encourages instant gratification, and many of our young people forget the value of hard work and replace it with what they will call “passion” – in the form of unsteady and capricious whims. As a business professor of mine said, this generation is concerned “with reaching only the summit, but forget about the climb.” This could not be any truer.

Cyber-Bullying and Disconnection

    Let us also not forget the issue of cyber-bullying. As shown in Dead Kids, one of the kidnappers recalls how the resident bully is able to bully him in all mediums – physically in school, as well as online, in front of everyone, and get away with it. Those on the posting-end, who receive numerous likes, views and comments, feel as though their online taunts are encouraged and justified, and those as the object of cyber-bullying, feel as though they deserve this treatment. What makes it even worse is that nobody is really held accountable. You can easily see how this can make one spiral downwards in self-loathing and anger. It does not come as a surprise that the recent literature today speaks of significantly increasing rates of depression, aggression, anxiety – and even suicide among the youth. Another matter hand-in-hand with this are issues on personal connections, or the lack thereof. Why does it seem that young people today feel like they have no safe space or outlet to talk about what they are really going through? We have heard this before: that the more we are connected through the cyber world and technology, the more we have become disconnected in our actual and personal relationships.

Narcissism and Materialism

    There was also a memorable scene in Dead Kids during the drop-off of the ransom money at the agreed location. (The location happens to be real-life bar called 2020, in Pasong Tamo where I have been to a couple of time before, and coincidentally today is 02.20.2020). The ransom money is put together by the victim’s father, an alleged drug lord, and he places the money in a designer bag. The moment the bag is plopped in the center of the dance floor, amidst the blazing trap music and flashing neon lights, many girls race for it, not knowing its contents. The scene was done really well, and you just think to yourself, “Wow, have we really become this materialistic and shallow, that we would physically fight over a designer bag?” In turn, the raucous compromises the whole operation, and one of the girls is held at gunpoint.

The Death of a Nation

    I would go so far to say that I believe there is a breakdown of values in the Philippines and in the world today. We can blame social media, but ultimately, we also have to look inwards at ourselves.  Sometimes, we too propagate social injustices with our simple, unconscious actions.

    Our leaders as well have a responsibility. Unfortunately, the highest leader of the land, our incumbent President has not personified anything substantial to be emulated, but we are either gripped with fear, indifference or blind loyalty and let things be. Regarding his character alone, on TV for instance, our children watch our President curse and drop profanity in every statement likes there’s no tomorrow. They will grow up thinking that this is totally okay and cool, and then we wonder why we have dead kids. It is because we are becoming a Dead nation.

    Moreover, he has made rape jokes, sexist and sordid comments against women, demeaning statements against Pope Francis and the Church, but his supporters continue to make unfounded excuses for this behavior. Our journalists and media as well are being silenced with real threats – to livelihood and life. Those who attempt to speak out are punished without due process and are ridiculed in a dehumanizing manner – Senator Leila de Lima being the biggest example of this. Most importantly, he continues to justify his drug war and extra judicial killings through conjured up data and convoluted truths. Have we lost our sights on human rights, life and God? These scenarios seem all too familiar.

Parallelisms to Martial Law of the Marcos Regime

    We can draw many softer parallelisms of what is happening today to the atrocities of Martial Law under the 20-year Marcos dictatorship. Filipinos are truly quick to forget or love to choose to be ignorant. What I find truly unacceptable, that in this age where information is abundant and easily accessible, turns out many Filipinos, not just among the younger Millennials and Gen Z groups, but actually older people too, have a skewed version of Martial Law. They think it was a Golden Era of discipline and crime-free streets, not knowing about the countless and undocumented people who were imprisoned, murdered and tortured. To say the least, some do not even know Martial Law once existed in the Philippines. This ignorance and lack of information is not limited to just the uneducated, but persists even among private school educated Filipinos. Apparently, this part of Philippine history – Ninoy Aquino, Martial Law and the 1986 Edsa People Power Revolution is not really taught or emphasized in our education system. It is truly a tragedy because we Filipinos were the victors of this miraculous, peaceful revolt which ultimately toppled Marcos, and yet we have not been able write history as it should be.

    President Duterte was elected because he sold the idea that the Philippines can only be great again with an “iron-fisted” leader, the same dream that Marcos peddled to the Philippines. Today with President Duterte at the helm, the myth of the iron-fisted leader is again debunked, and now is an unfolding tragedy.

The Importance of Real, Personal Relationships

    The movie’s title, I’d like to believe, is a comment on the actual reality of extra judicial killings happening in the Philippines today, but the movie also tells us that being a Dead Kid means more than the literal sense. Perhaps we’ve all felt like a dead kid at some point in life. I personally know what it felt like to be one; I can say that I have felt it twice in my youth. I had lost my way, my purpose and felt dead inside. But what helped me conquer my demons? It was my support system composed of my family and various groups of friends. During my most vulnerable and weak moments, they had been there all along and instilled the strength I needed to bounce back. Very importantly as well, they were real friends who had the courage to intervene and tell me to my face when I was becoming the worst version of myself. You need these types of people – or you will really go through life thinking, either that you are completely alone or completely invincible.

    Many years later, now that I have a daughter, I know that I cannot shield her completely from the problems of the world, but I hope I can truly imbibe one of the most important qualities – and that is resilience. I know that like me, she will fail at things. She will get hurt. She will be rejected, at times, for no good reason. However, I want her to be tough, to be brave and rise to the occasion when needed. Giving up is not the answer. She must also remember to always be kind, fair and have integrity despite how unbelievable people can be. We are all dealt with a different deck of cards in life, but to be able to achieve that winning hand lies in you.

Generation Alpha

    Analysts have dubbed the Generation Alpha (Gen Alpha) as the generation that will succeed the Gen Zs. They are those born in 2010 up until the year 2025, supposedly the “children of the Millennials,” our children. I think about this movie Dead Kids, and then I think to myself that I do not want my daughter and our generation’s children to grow up with fractured values and distorted principles. Don’t you want to handover to your children, a world that you can be proud of?

    I am no expert, and I am no Mother Teresa, but I do know that as early as their formative years, we must be conscious and deliberate about the things we say and do – because they will mimic what they see. We must teach them what is morally wrong, even if it is deemed okay by society. The family unit is the very first thing that a child knows – so us as parents, or as older people wizened by life experiences, truly have that responsibility to set a good example. Education is also key for political consciousness and value formation.

    Like I said earlier, when I was going through tough times in my youth, what made all the difference were my family and friends. I was lucky enough to have grown up with the right group of friends – those that had a positive influence throughout my entire life. It was never about material things, but rather what was intangible and essential.

     We have to be very present and visible in our children’s lives – but to also give them sufficient space to grow and make mistakes. Of course, it is easier said than done – but the growing demographic of dead kids, both literally and figuratively, is today’s reality. I do not want to wake up one day and find that we have turned our children into Dead Kids.

[wordsablaze]

Legacy Of Love

Even if you realise it because of two teenage wizards messing with time, knowing that you have a legacy is a pretty nice birthday present… A Harry Potter Phan crossover written for Hermione’s birthday! Enjoy!

They’re so done for.

Absolutely done for.

In fact, they couldn’t possibly be any more done for.

This is the end of their time at Hogwarts. It’s the end of their time together. It’s the end of all time that can exist and the end of all time that is simply an illusion designed to school routine into children’s heads so that they conform without question in later life.

At least, that’s what Dan would tell you if you asked him. If you asked Phil, you’d get a different response. A completely different response that would make you question how two boys with such different responses to a potentially hopeless situation could ever be friends.

But of course nobody gets a chance to ask Phil because Dan’s the one who’s currently panicking and rambling about fireworks being exploded without proper consent. Which is a debatable topic that has absolutely no relevance whatsoever to anything at all in this particular moment.

The two of them hadn’t actually been doing anything wrong, illegal, or immoral, but they’d had the unfortunate misfortune of being caught by the brightest witch in recent history. It only takes a few minutes for said witch, who’d brought them back to her office before either of them could even begin to justify their actions, to sigh in frustration and place her hands on her hips with a doubting frown on her face.

“And you two were trespassing because?” she asks, raising an eyebrow.

Dan finally decides to shut up about the fireworks, letting Phil lace their fingers together and step forwards, as if shielding the rather panicked teenager with his superficially elegant poise.

“We’re sorry, we’ve gone there before without knowing that it’s private land and simply went back to get something we’d left behind; we weren’t trying to steal anything,” Phil explains calmly.

Dan doesn’t know how he can be so calm at a time like this. Well, he doesn’t know how Phil can be calm at any point in life. How can someone who possesses the power to change all known laws of science ever be calm when their world is constantly revealing how ignorant they used to be?

“You’re not lying.” The witch sounds surprised, as if expecting them to have lied, to be evil.

“We’re really not.” Phil squeezes Dan’s hand as he says this, urging him to stay calm.

Yet again, Dan wonders how Phil can tell when he’s upset or stressed. He wonders how the two of them are so connected that one can be aware of the emotions running through the other’s veins even when they’re facing opposite directions. He would call it magical, but the irony of that phrasing would never forgive him.

“What were you attempting to retrieve?” the witch asks, again, looking a lot more relaxed now that she knows they’re not a threat.

And now it’s Phil’s turn to panic, or rather, freeze as he internally panics.

Clearing his throat, Dan pulls the other boy backwards and meets the witch’s curious gaze with a confidence he only feels when protecting Phil. “It was a… uh, trinket. Of sorts.”

The witch’s expression hardens suddenly, as if detecting something. She narrows her eyes at them, as if realising something. And, as she pulls out a golden necklace that looks suspiciously like the one they’d gone back for in the first place, the two boys gasp as if something has suddenly dawned on them.

“No!” Dan yells as she turns the dial and vanishes, knowing that she knows they know she knows exactly what they were looking for.

“Dan…” Phil starts, but even he trails off as he thinks about it, the two of them subconsciously edging closer to each other as they wait.

It takes the witch longer than expected and neither of them would like to wonder why. If they were thinking clearly, they might have considered something positive, but having viscous oil dumped on you as you fall through fake clouds does wonders for pessimism.

So the two of them end up pacing, simultaneously trying to get rid of the liquid still dripping off their clothes. Just when they’re about to give up and throw themselves onto the beanbags, someone knocks on the door, a split second before the whole thing flies off its hinges and soars above their heads, landing so close to their heels that they can feel the heat radiating from it.

“Oh, sorry boys!” a tired voice calls, the witch appearing seconds later, twirling her wand to fix the door as if nothing had ever happened.

“Please, we-” Dan starts, but he’s cut off by his own shocked gasp.

“Is that the-?” Phil can’t even finish the question, his eyes lighting up like the moon on a summer’s day.

The witch smiles at them. “Come on, I’m not so mean as to deprive you of what’s rightfully yours, am I?”

She holds out the time-turner that had landed the boys in this mess, the time-turner that had been around her neck when she’d caught them, the time-turner that had been taken away from them by someone with frizzing brown hair…

“It was you?” Phil asks incredulously.

The witch laughs, “Well, aren’t you bright?”

Dan stiffens on behalf of Phil but the witch waves a hand. “Don’t worry, I’m not trying to be rude.”

“Anyway, I trust you with it.”

“You do?” Phil asks.

People usually don’t trust him with things. They can’t trust him because he’s too clumsy, because he’s so pale he looks like a vampire, because he listens to weird music, because he actually likes plants, the list goes on.

But this witch, the one who went to the effort of using a time turner to go back in time and steal the exact same object from him while he tries to get it back after having it taken away, is handing it right back? And that too, after having broken at least four rules of time manipulation in the process? All because she trusts Phil?

“Phil, love, breathe,” Dan murmurs softly, squeezing his hand.

The witch smiles at them and Phil uses Dan’s gentle nudge to remind his lungs that oxygen is a necessary ingredient for life. Once he’s successfully inhaling again, he coughs. “Are you being serious?”

“Absolutely. I do not joke.”

“That I can agree with,” Dan mutters under his breath, Phil stifling a laugh.

“Listen, I know what happened,” she tells them.

Dan and Phil couldn’t possibly look any more stricken, both staring at her with shocked and worried expressions as they edge towards each other again, as if looking for a solace they can only find in each other.

“It’s okay, I’m not going to punish you. I know how it feels, the need to turn time back.”

“No, we weren’t going to-”

The witch lifts up a hand, her knowing smile only widening. “I’m well aware that the two of you were simply trying to amend someone else’s mistakes. But some mistakes are better left written – not erased – trust me.”

“But-”

The witch holds up a hand, shaking her head. “No. You can’t change someone’s death.”

“You did!” Dan argues.

“Actually, I didn’t. The victim in my case never died, but your friend… it would be another mistake to return his life. Believe me.”

Phil exhales sadly, squeezing his eyes shut. Seeing the action, Dan’s small supply of optimism depletes, and he leans on Phil as he tries to wrap his mind around the fact that they can’t change anything and that everything they did was for nothing.

The witch pauses sympathetically, then smiles warmly. “Would you like a drink?”

Too upset to be impolite, the two boys nod, taking a glass each when the witch materialises them. Too upset to remember that magic can be hidden in drinks, they each take a small sip. Too upset to recognise the signs of forced fatigue, the two of them sway and fall to the floor with soft thumps before they can even identify the taste of their drink.

The witch curses, half regretting her actions, then shouts: “Ron!”

“What have you done now?” he yells back.

“Just get up here!”

Ron groans when he walks in the room to see two young wizards draped over each other on the floor, unconscious. It takes him less than a minute – and obviously the sight of their spilled drinks – to understand what had happened, and he places a comforting arm around the witch, shaking his head.

“What happened this time?”

“It wasn’t their fault actually. They just wanted to save their friend from death,” she tells him sadly.

“And you gave them your time turner?” Ron asks, seeing the golden chain wrapped around Phil’s hand.

“It’s technically his now, I stole it back before deciding they should keep it.”

“You can explain that to me another time.”

“Right.” The witch nods, shaking her head to remind herself of the most important issue at the moment. “I might have given them something to make them forget they’d ever gone there in the first place.”

“Really?” Ron sighs, but he’s not surprised, knowing that his wife is too compassionate to let them live their lives with regret nestled in their heart. After all, both of them know first-hand that regret is one of the most dangerous emotions known to man and wizard alike, as well as everyone that falls in between.

“Just, help me with them?” the witch requests.

Ron looks sceptical but the witch pouts. “Won’t you do it for me as a birthday gift, please?”

“You know I will…” Ron sighs, rolling his sleeves up.

Which is exactly why Dan and Phil wake up an hour or so later with almost identical groans, matching headaches, and weird metallic tastes in their mouths. They both look for each other as soon as they’re alert enough to remember who they are, and fingers have honestly never been interlocked so fast.

Both Ron and the witch have to stifle their laughs as the two boys scramble to their feet, and Ron quickly grabs their abandoned drinks, shuffling out of the room so they’re not confused when they properly wake themselves up.

“Are you boys okay?” the witch asks, now in a different version of the same outfit and sporting a much neater hairstyle that’s almost completely frizz free.

Phil mumbles an affirmative before realising that the golden necklace is now hanging around his neck. He gasps, his free hand flying to the trinket, and looks up with a baffled expression, a strange hope shining in his eyes.

“What happened?” Dan asks on behalf of them both.

“You, uh, had a minor run in with one of our escaped creatures while retrieving that time turner.”

“We’re sorry that we-”

“It’s alright, I’m not penalising you,” the witch assures, smiling softly.

“Thank you,” Phil breathes, his grip on Dan’s hand tightening.

“Now, I presume that your next request will be a return journey to Hogwarts, yes?”

Dan and Phil share a glance before slowly nodding, still slightly confused. Neither of them remember that they’d been mourning before they’d been caught so they have no idea why they’re covered in oil. Apparently memory potions and their effects don’t work on oil.

The witch watches as the two of them are escorted out of her office, and she watches them giggle at each other’s jokes as they walk to the main gate. She sees the way they lean into each other and barely ever look away from one another, smiling each time they bump shoulders or almost step on each other because they’re walking so close together.

She almost jumps when Ron puts his arms around her waist, his chin settling on her shoulder. “I’m proud of you, you know that, right?”

“Yes, Ron, you only remind me every day.” And even though eyes are rolled in exasperation, the phrase is said with sincerity and love.

“Happy birthday, ‘Miony,” Ron whispers gently, chuckling.

“I love you too,” Hermione replies with a soft giggle.

She knows that Ron has planned a romantic dinner for the two of them because he’s truly terrible at keeping secrets, even after all these years, but it doesn’t matter. Somehow, the knowledge that others can experience the love that they share is the best birthday present she could ever have wished for.

She’s content knowing that if she and Ron have a legacy, it’s much better than a statue or a document. It’s a promise. It’s a promise that anything can happen, that anyone can be anything, and that first impressions are most definitely not last impressions. She’s content knowing that their legacy is their love and their love is their legacy.

Well, that, and knowing her time turner is in safe hands.

Probably.

Hopefully.

Actually, she might have to check that…

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