#sorry matt. maybe you can get some help from tom

[holy-reference-in-a-username]

Can Matt turn into a bat? If he can what do the others do about it lol i just imagine like tord carrying him in his pocket

oh yeah that would be adorable.

....unfortunately Matt still hasn't figured that part out.

[c0la-queen]

RAGHHHHHHHHH

Could you ever so kind and provide some general dating Headcannons for all the four boys?? 🥺👉👈

Maybe some extra with red leader or someone else if you’re fine with that??? 🥺💜

Mwah mwah you have amazing work <3 /p

Oh my gods I am SO sorry that this is so late!! For some reason, Mr. Tumblr decided not to notify me about your ask?? And then I was at my bestie's house this weekend, so I haven't checked my inbox until now. Begging for your forgiveness rn Anon!!

Also literally kissing you for asking for Red Leader!! Mwah, mwah!!

---

Edd

If you are dating Edd... girlie I am so sorry for your sanity.

Don't get me wrong, I love Edd! He was my first Eddsworld love, my pookie bear for real! But he's the biggest bastard of the entire gang and I stand by that.

Calls you dumb pet names to try and make you laugh. Sugar Tits (regardless of gender or lack thereof, might I add), Baby Doll, Sexy.

He WILL grab/slap your ass all the time. Even in public. Only grins when you glare at him.

This man is a horrible influence. It will be so hard to get your shit done if he has decided that you need to be spending time with him. Why worry about work or chores when you could be all cuddled up with him and Ringo on the couch?

Will sulk if you reject his attempts.

If he's trying to get shit done and you're pestering him for attention? He will drop his basket of laundry or the dishes in his hands in a millisecond.

If he's working on a commission or animation, he'll let you sit in his lap in his chair, let you sit all pretty for him while he works. When he finishes, if you've fallen asleep by then -which you usually do - then he'll carefully move you both to his bed and snuggle up to you and take a nap with you.

Speaking of cuddling, he does naturally run hot. Comes with being a big boy <3 But if you don't enjoy that, then he'll use his powers to cool down his skin for you. Anything to keep cuddling!

He also uses his powers whenever possible. Will abuse them without shame. He puts things on the highest shelf, just so you have to him for help. He'll put patches of ice on the floor under your feet, just so he can catch you before you fall (he'll never let you actually get hurt), and uses his super strength to scoop you up randomly and carry you around.

You cannot show your text messages to ANYONE. He will say filthy things, just to fluster you. Horny Bastard. Finds ways to turn even the most mundane conversations into teasing.

He'd do cute couple things with you, like painting together and swapping canvases every 5 minutes. His favorite is going to cat cafes. The cats literally love him, its like he's made of catnip with how they swarm him.

Physical affection is a huge thing with him. Even little touches throughout the day, like ruffling your hair as he passes by, or a big hug from behind while you fix food.

Overall, big teddy bear that just likes to see his darling blush.

Tom

As I've stated in previous works, Tom is a secret romantic.

He's not a traditional romantic like Matt, but he's romantic in his own way.

Likes parallel play a lot. Finds it relaxing to just sit in his room, testing new songs on his bass while you lay on his bed reading a book. Or in your room, lounging on one of your plush beanbag and organizing his Spotify playlists while you fold your laundry.

Dates with him consist of record stores, concerts, and late night walks.

He'll sing for you if you ask him to.

Very down to earth, both as a person and as a boyfriend. If you have problems, he'll listen patiently until you're done, then help you brainstorm solutions. He doesn't downplay or ignore your feelings, but he doesn't jump to emotions like others might.

He tends to sleep in late on his nights off, since he's more of a night owl than anything. You know that, so you've made it a little tradition to fix him coffee around 11. You know exactly how he takes it, and he always thanks you with a kiss on the cheek and a sleepy, mumbled "you're the best."

Very caring. He'll make sure you've eaten and had water. Will usher you to bed if he can see that you're tired, or do your chores for you if you can't do them for whatever reason. If you can't sleep, he'll make you a mug of chamomile tea and sing you a little lullaby.

When it comes to his monster tendencies, he tries to keep you away from it all. He's bitter about what he is, and he thinks that you're better off separated from that side of him.

At the start of relationship, he'd get angry if you tried to push it. He'd snap at you, distance himself, not talk to you for maybe a couple of days. Further on in the relationship, though, if you push the issue and reassure him that you love every side of him, even the monstrous one, then he'd be more willing. Willing to let you in, to let you see that part of him. He'd be nervous about it, but he'd do it because he loves you.

Matt

He is a traditional romantic! His Mama raised him right, and he drinks his Respect Juice.

Makes sure you two have date night at least once every week. Dressing up nice, going out to dinner or a play, taking a walk through the town to wind down the night. Heading back into the house, changing back into comfortable clothes. He'd wipe your makeup off for you, if you wear it.

Absolutely the kind of guy to get down on his knees in front of you and unbuckle/untie your shoes or high heels for you. He's just so devotional.

If, for whatever reason, you guys are unable to have your date night, he'll make it up to you in some way. A bouquet of your favorite flowers sitting on your bed with a little note. A passionate kiss before one of you has to leave the house. A heartfelt love letter sealed with wax.

Makes sure to text you throughout the day with sweet messages. Compliments, "I love you"s, selfies, updates on what is happening at work. Or just reminders that he's thinking of you. Misses you.

Likes to cook meals for you if its just the two of you at home. Breakfast is his forte, but he's not the worst at following a recipe.

Always amazing for advice. He'll let you talk to him while he hugs you from behind. If it's something sad, he might cry. Just the idea of you going through something negative makes him sad, too.

If he doesn't have advice for you, he'd do anything in his power to find someone who does. One of the other roommates, or even his mother, if you're comfortable with it.

Speaking of his mother, she absolutely adores you. Since Matt has such a good relationship with her, he's already told her so much about you. She thinks its wonderful that her baby has fallen in love. After a while, Matt will even bring you along to his lunches with his mother. You two hit it off instantly.

If you're okay with it, then Matt would love to show you off on his social media. He thinks you're so gorgeous, the entire world should know that he managed to land you. Its never anything invasive, and he always gets your permission before he posts things. Blocks any weird or gross comments.

Loves going on shopping dates with you. Most of the time, its at the mall or a mall in a different town, because he loves walking around and window shopping. Occasionally, he'll take you to more expensive stores. It doesn't bother him, he loves spoiling you. No matter where you two are, he'll buy you anything that you want. If you are adamant to spend your own money, he won't put up too much of a fuss, though he does prefer to pay for you.

He'll do that couples trend with you where you find nail polish that matches the other's eye color.

Gift giving is just one of his love languages in general. It makes him so happy to give his loved one things that he bought. For you specifically, he'll also throw in hand made gifts. He may not be the most talented artistically, but he'll stay awake late into the night, sitting on the floor with a YouTube tutorial playing, paper and cardboard scattered around, a pencil between his teeth, paint on his hands and smeared on his cheek. The end result may look a little crude, but he'll still present it to you with pride. And, of course, you always love it.

Tord

Tord is probably the most romantically stunted of the four. Its not that he doesn't love you, far from it really. He just grew up in an environment where love wasn't freely given, and was often limited for appearances.

His father, as the Red Leader, insisted that he keep a professional and feared image. So, Tord never saw him being affectionate with his mother.

It might be hard at first. You'll struggle. You two may fight. But you'll always make up in the end. He'll listen to you, try to understand your point of view.

He's not against physical affection, but he's able to live without it. Will indulge you whenever you ask. If he's busy, which he usually is, he'll let you drape yourself over him from behind while he sits in his chair, letting you rest your cheek on the top of his head and watch him work.

More than anything, his love language is words of affirmation. Despite being a man of few words, he'll always give you praise. He'll make sure you know that you are his, he is yours, and he loves you. Nothing will change that.

Scary dog privilege. He'll always walk just behind you in public, keeping a guiding hand on the small of your back. Stays alert of you surroundings and the people around, so that you don't have to. You don't even have to worry about people approaching you in public. One piercing glare from Tord is enough to deter anyone.

Not the best at giving advice to problems. He'll listen, but sometimes he can't quite understand why something is an issue. Doesn't invalidate your feelings on purpose, it just happens inadvertently at times. Always, ALWAYS apologizes and holds you close when he realizes what he did.

His preferred dates are nights in at home. Cuddled up on the couch with takeout watching shitty rom-coms. Cooking food that he ate growing up in Norway while you sit at the kitchen table watching. Going to the convenience store at midnight to get Ben and Jerry's in the middle of anime binges.

You become his crutch. When he's having bad paranoia on nights that are too quiet, he'll seek you out. Just having you lay in bed with him, warm and solid and breathing, always calms him down.

He will never let you meet his parents. You are one of the very few good things in his life, and he wants to keep that away from his fucked up home life. Might let you meet his little sister, but not for a long time.

Surprisingly, he does tend to talk more when its just the two of you. He allows you into his head, verbalizing his thoughts to you. He'll ramble about his projects, tell you about the history behind his culture, or rant about things that annoy him. Denies it vehemently in front of others.

He is a huge tease, second only to Edd. What's dangerous is how casual he is about it. Loves making you squirm, and he'll never even change his expression. Sometimes he won't even be looking at you, but rest assured that he is swimming in satisfaction over how flustered you are.

Red Leader

I have so many thoughts about him. Oh my lord.

This is going off the scenario where Reader is a Red Army soldier and met him through the army, after the events of The End.

I want to clarify that this is NOT following the events of TBATF!!! This is my own Red Army timeline, what I refer to in my Eddsworld bubble as "The Bad End"

There are two ways that you'd be able to catch Red Leader's attention. Either you are an extremely talented soldier that does well among your peers, enough to earn the praise of your superior officers and eventually Red Leader himself. Or, you were assigned as his personal assistant to help with paperwork and meetings, but you were so good at handling his temper and attitude that he found himself surprised.

The latter of the two is my favorite, so I'll be working under that one.

Before you, Red Leader had been through several assistants. None of them lasted more than a month. By nature, he was a moody, temperamental man. The stress of the army and oncoming war only made that worse. He saw those previous assistants as nuisances, only getting in his way. He would yell at them, berate them, drive them to the brink until they beg Paul and Pat to transfer them.

When they assigned you to him, they expected the same thing to happen. The two even made bets on how long you'd last. On your first day, Red Leader was nasty to you. Gruff and rude. But... you bit back. That took him by surprise. Instead of taking the insult and shuffling out like a puppy with its tail between its legs, you pursed your lips and gave him a stern look and talked to him in a way that nobody dared to. He should've been angry. Should have screamed at you, discharged you from the army in a heartbeat.

Instead, he found that he quite enjoyed it. He enjoyed your spitfire. Not that he'd let you know. He only gave you a noncommittal hum and dismissed you with a wave of his hand. But... he kept you around. Even found excuses for you to come into his office more than necessary. His penchant for teasing came back full force. He'd poke and prod, finding ways to make you react with that fire he so loved.

It takes a long time for him to finally make a move. Probably takes a near-death experience for him, or an injury to you for him to realize that he wants this. He wants a future with you.

At first, he may seem a little cold in public. Not to the degree that his father was - he promised himself that he would never be like his father. Simply a more... professional air about the entire thing. It was more out of anxiety than anything. He didn't want to make you a target, didn't want to cause you to get hurt. As his army grows more powerful and takes over more and more countries, he grows more comfortable with PDA. He knows that when he is the most powerful man in the world, he doesn't have to worry about anyone hurting you.

He would probably treat you more like a spouse than a girlfriend/boyfriend right off the bat. He's older now, thinking more about the future than the present. He already knows that he wants to be with you forever, so why go through the formalities and hassle of dating?

Always makes time for you whenever he can. If he's in a meeting with his generals or another world leader, he'll sneak text messages to you. Doesn't give a shit if he's caught. What are they going to do to him, Red Leader?

If he's cooped up in his office all day, his door is always open to you. Loves having you drop by unannounced to bring him food or coffee. He'll let you climb into his lap while he works, or sit behind him in his chair and cling to him. Even if you're just sitting in a separate chair nearby, working on your own stuff. He's happy.

If you want to continue being a soldier, or his assistant, he'll let you. But he's also perfectly happy to have you simply be his partner and not have a care in the world. You could sit all pretty in his quarters waiting for him to get off duty, or use the time to pursue your own hobbies and interests. As long as you're happy and cared for, it's okay with him.

Spoils you rotten. You're Red Leader's, so of course you only deserve the best things. Anything in the world you want, you only have to ask for it. It's yours. He would raze entire cities just to see you smile.

He does enjoy taking you out on dates. While also spending time with you, he sees it as a way to show you off to the world. Dressing you up in the finest clothes that he got you, the prettiest jewelry that he bought. Taking you to restaurants and operas where everyone can see you hanging on his arm. It makes him puff up with pride.

When the two of you are alone, he's so adoring. Loves snuggling. It's a struggle to convince him to let you out of bed in the mornings, he'll just be clinging to you. If you do somehow manage to escape his grasp, he'll catch you around the waist and drag you back to bed. Won't stop until Paul or Pat message him to get his ass out of bed. He always grumbles about how "it's my damn army, I should get to sleep in as long as I want".

Sometimes, at night, he has pains in his right shoulder, the side where he's burned and amputated. It can range from a dull ache to excruciating pain. On nights that it hurts too much to move, you'll scramble out of bed and get his medication from his nightstand, gently coaxing him to take it. You'll hold him and comfort him until the pain subsides and he falls back asleep.

He doesn't like to talk about it, really. It feels weird, letting anyone see this part of his life. Letting you see his vulnerability. Letting you see him.

But he does.

[dxwnfxll]

Heyy!! How are you?<3

I just found your blog and I'm so happy I did! So I decided to leave a request for some hc's of the main 4 eddsworld boys finding out the reader is a stoner? Like they'll just get into the house and see the reader faded af and just being extra chill abt everything??

If you don't do multiple character hc's, then the same premise but only for Tord. Thank you lovely :))

Hiya !! I'm doing swell ! Hope ya are to :) !!

And awesome HC idea totally gonna write it out

Hope ya enjoy it ! (And sorry for the wait i've been busy busy !!)

The eddsworld boys with a stoner reader

(gender neutral reader)

Tord

- So Tord is DEF a stoner, you can't tell me other wise. So when he casually arrives home one day a lil earlier than the others and finds reader faded as hell he just fucking laughs.

- He def gets high with reader, he has a collection of funny lil bongs including a anime girl one he spent a shit ton of money on.

- Reader got munchies? He's got ya, he's got his own lil munchie stash in his room.

- Readers first time getting high? He'll call you stupid but help you through it, make sure you don't freak tf out

- You and him probably sit on the couch looking like idiots laughing at the dumbest shit (probably a dumb commercial Tord keeps rewinding back over and over)

Edd

- I don't see Edd as a stoner but he's okay with the 'lifestyle', though when he came back after a cola run and found Reader staring at the ceiling snickering here and there he's very concerned

- " Did Tord give you something from his stash? TORD !! "

- When he figures out YOU are ALSO a stoner he's like " oh "

- He's kinda curious about what it's like sometimes, especially since he's been casually watching you/Tord getting high randomly and looking like y'all are having the time of your lives.

- Careful if you actually let him get high with you, He's gonna freak tf out and get some bad munchies

- If he never gets high with you though he just kinda keeps an eye on you to make sure you're okay

Matt

- He's not a stoner, doesn't even know what a stoner is. So when he comes home and smells something 'bad' in the air he thinks it's a damn fire

- Idk why he thought it was a fire he just did, he sees smoke coming under your door and grabs a bucket and before you even know it he's thrown water in your room...on you.

- He killed your vibe

- He does apologize though at least

Tom

- He used to be a stoner, he kinda stopped after he got into Smirnoff and didn't wanna be juggling both y'know?

- When he comes home and sees you on the couch he just holds in a lil laugh and goes " i know that face, someones tripping balls"

- He MAKES you give him a hit on the blunt/bong/whatever (or an edible if you prefer edibles)

- He's a pro at this shit so he's chilling, and hopefully you are too. But a few mins in he'll get up and grab some snacks for you two.

- He isn't a very giggly high when y'all two are high but he's more 'idiotic', he'll find random photos and think they're the funniest shit known to man kind. He's also very hungry and thirsty when he gets high

- Tord is NOT allowed during y'alls high time

- He takes big breaks when getting high, so if you're a stoner that does it daily or day after day he's not gonna smoke with ya every day. He smokes like maybe once or twice a week? It really depends

Bonus:

Eduardo

- He judges you, but when he sees how chill you are when high he decides to take a hit. He gets mad when he doesn't get high from one hit

- Excuse him he's a lil dumb, you tell him it takes more than one hit and he just grumbles before taking another hit

- Once he's high with you he just sits there, you probably gotta check on him to make sure he's okay

- After that time he gets high with you whenever he can, dude probably needs it tbh

Jon

- He doesn't really understand but he's cool with it ! :D

Mark

- Mark prefers to not be around whenever you get high, it's not that he hates you being a stoner he just isn't into smoking and all that. He does warn you about the bad stuff with smoking though womp womp

Paul

- Dude doesn't care, he probably finds you high in the barracks at the red army base. He probably sits with you and smokes his own cigarettes just chilling with you

- " everybody needs a break every now and then, just don't be high while your work yeah ? "

- If you ask for anything to help get you down from your high so you can work he'll usually help (if he's in a good mood)

Patryck

- Judging

- He doesn't like that you're high during work, doesn't like the smell and doesn't like how you act while high

- gets a lil annoyed if he has to help you walk around or anything

- def never getting high with you, but he's def had a contact buzz before

Yippe ! Hope you enjoyed sorry if it seemed rushed at all

[beplinkclick]

yooo happy birthday :>> , about the request, could I get headcanons of the eddsworld boys with a chaotic goth reader? like, reader wears goth clothes, likes to get in trouble and play pranks on people, but they can also be pretty chill and calm

that was the coolest idea I could get from my brain, take your time btw and happy birthday again

Eddsworld Boys with a Goth reader

🥓Edd

Edd it's just chill with that.

I mean, the only wired thing he finds wired it's the make up. He thinks it's creepy sometimes.

He loves that you're a calm person because he's really tired of his loud friends even know he's a energetic one himself.

You like to play pranks on people? WELL BE READY, CUZ THIS MAN RIGHT HERE IT'S READY TO PRANK EVERY PERSON ON THE PLANET!!!!

He hates when you get in trouble. At some point he will walk with you almost everywhere just to make sure you don't do something stupid.

He also ask you more about your styling just to make sure what he will buy you as a gift 📦

🎸Tom

He likes you're still

He doesn't really mind what you wear or how you act as long as you don't make him uncomfortable

You want to paint his nails in black or anything else? Well to late he always has his nails painted in black:)

You're a troublemaker? Well he is to but don't you think he will get you out of the prison because you and him for sure will share a cell for your crimes

He absolutely love when you're out of your chaotic part, he can finally chill with you by singing, watching movies, sleeping etc.

Maybe if he's in a good mood you can go at him with some outfits and he will give his opinion in what will suit you but he doesn't mind if you don't like his choose[actually he will but he just deny it]

🔫Tord

This man when he will see your still he will for sure make a pervet thing but if he's out of the pervet mod he will just compliment your look

If you wear make up he will ask you at least one time to make him up because he's curious how he will look

If you like to do pranks, he will not help you but he will laugh at them. He hates sometimes when is the victim

If you will get in trouble he will be like "One real troublemaker, are you kid?"

He's the opposite of Tom, he won't get into trouble too often but if he did he wouldn't get caught by anyone and he'll make sure you won't be in any danger either

If you were arrested by absurdity, he will help you 100% to escape without a trace

He's a busy man but he will always appreciate the little calm and chill moments he has with you:)

💫Matt

I don't think he's a big fan but if you ask for help he can't say no!

At first when he meets you, it's freaked out but when he realised that you're a chill person he thinks you're nice and start to get along with you more

He's a sensitive person so don't do pranks on the poor boy, he don't like pranks

He's always looking at his mirror like 24/8 and he don't do to much trouble. But when he dose you can make yourself sure that both of you will try to get out of the situation ending up making it worse

♡There you go! I hope I did it right, I'm not really into this thing about goth so I didn't really know what to write.

☆I'm also really sorry about the bad grammar!!!

♤And thanks for the request!!!

[maxverstappensflatbrim]

Show Me Yours | Matty Healy [39]

chapter thirty-nine, act five: the ballad of me and my brain

masterlist

July 9th 2017 

She can hear him.

He’s in the bathroom, snorting something before the show.

She’s the only one left in the green room, the rest are waiting to go on to perform their set at the TRNSMT festival.

She doesn’t barge in like she wants to, she can hear the tap running and his throat clearing as she waits impatiently near the settee. Dressed in her outfit ready to go on stage, a grey tank top tucked into her stripy patterned jeans and one of Ross’ shirts she definitely didn’t steal while it was her turn to do the laundry run.

The door opens, Matty jumps.

“Jesus, Tommie.”

He’s holding an eyeliner pencil in his hand and nudges her shoulder with his own to pass her. She turns watching him as he walks to the full body mirror and starts attempting to draw on himself.

“We’re on in two minutes.”

“Yeah, give me five.”

“Two minutes, Matt.”

He groans, it’s a dramatic thing he does with his head thrown back and his eyes closed.

She looks over him, his red nose and dark eyeshadow covered eyes, he’s wearing black tight fitting trousers and a black blazer.

“Help me then.”

She gives him a look over his shoulder, meeting his eyes in the mirror and his shoulders drop from the hard defensive exterior that they were being held in. “Please.”

She walks over, making sure her huff is loud enough for him to catch, “What are you trying to do?”

“Write ‘what a shame’.”

She nods and makes sure her work is quick, his stomach tenses when her cold fingers first touch it. He sucks his stomach in and holds his breath as she gently presses the pencil into his skin.

Her fingers dance across the we are kings tattoo and he bites down hard on his lip as she caps the pencil and slowly stands, her eyes finally meeting his.

He nods, his way of saying thanks and she hands back the eyeliner to him which he gently takes.

Only instead of letting her hand it over and step back, his fingers wrap around her hand that’s still holding onto the pencil.

“Tom-”

She looks up at him, through her lashes with this innocent furrow of her brows that has his heart physically hurting. Or maybe it’s just the drugs.

“Hmm?”

“I never said sorry.”

She pulls her wrist away, as if he’s burned her. Her mind is going to her birthday, to the conversation on the porch.

“That I ruined your birthday.”

She shrugs, “I never liked my birthday anyway.”

“You love your birthday,” He says, “I did it. I made you love your birthday.”

She shakes her head, “No, Matty. I just loved spending time with you.”

His eyes soften, but she misses it as she steps away and rings her hands together, “You’re just too full of yourself to realise it. But the only reason I agreed to those stupid things every year was to spend time with you. Just us-”

“Tom-”

“Guys, you’re on.” Jamie is appearing in the doorway, that stern look on his face as he had sent Tommie to get him in the first place and now she’s late herself.

Tommie nods and leaves, doesn’t linger or hold the door for Matty who is right behind her. She’s grabbing her guitar from a stage hand and walking out to where the guys are waiting. Ross raises a brow, a question being asked with just his facial expression.

‘Everything good?’

Tommie just shakes her head and casts a glance at Matty as he emerges. The screams of the fans deafen her as Matty makes his presence known on stage.

But the entire thing is a shit show.

Both Adam and Ross have to hold her back at some point throughout the show, Ross because Matty makes a subtle jab at her and her relationship, one that the fans won’t catch or understand but she will.

And Adam because he was so obviously off his face every few seconds she would speak into everyone’s ear pieces demanding he take a break, drink water and hopefully sober up.

He ignores her, he ignores them all, at one point, George comes down from the drum kit when he’s having a drink break. They mutter quietly between each other, no one else can hear them. But Tommie knows it’s tense. Because George’s jaw is clenched and his hand is digging into Matty’s shoulder to hold him down. Not in that, supportive hold on him to the ground so he doesn’t float away kind of way, but the kind to get him to stay put to listen. The harsh kind of way.

But it makes him worse. He’s just not there. 

It seems that the high has hit him half way through, and he’s no longer loveable Matty. He’s not Matty the lead singer of the 1975, or Matty their bandmate.

“What the fuck?”

He groans, she hasn’t even waited to get off stage to start having a go at him.

They’re mid-bow, his arm is slung over her shoulder and he’s smiling, at the crowd, not at her.

But she’s not smiling. She’s got that angry look that he’s become all too familiar with the past few months.

“Can it wait?”

She pushes his arm off of her shoulders harshly and scoffs, “No, what the fuck was that, Matt?”

“Matty.”

She raises a brow, he blows a kiss to the screaming fans and stumbles off stage, but she’s not done yet. She’s after him straight away, following him backstage and towards their green room.

“What?”

“My name’s Matty, you know, it’s a form of- of-” He pauses, hanging off one of the large lights they have set up out the back of the stages, “Respect, to address a person correctly.”

“Correctly? Alright, dickhead, what the fuck was-”

“Real mature, you know, it’s easy to tell you’re the youngest.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“You’re a child, Tommie.” He says firmly, turning away from their current path towards the rest of the band to stop her from walking on, “You’re not mature. You’ve been protected from the harsh realities of the world by Adam for too long. You need to grow up and realise that- that you can’t be in one perfect relationship for the rest of your life, and you can’t help everyone, and that there’ll be things like drugs, and alcohol and violence, and-and not everything is fucking happiness unicorn, rainbows. Like those stupid fucking kiddy cartoon movies you make us all watch.”

“Yeah, I was!” She shouts after him, “I was a kid when this whole thing started out, I was a kid when I left home, I was a scared, terrified little kid, and you-” She pushes a finger into his chest, “You were supposed to be the one to protect me. You promised me, Matt, you promised me you’d protect me, that you’d keep me safe. And you’re the one that’s hurt me the most.”

He pauses, his shoulders drop, his jaw unclenches, he softens.

But she hardens. Her shoulders raise and her jaw bites down.

She shakes her head and starts laughing as she steps back, “I can’t- I can’t do this.”

“Do what?” His defences are back up, his head is raised, he’s watching her through smudged eyeshadow. 

“Watch you slowly destroy everything. Your image, the band… yourself. Me.” Her voice cracks on the last few words and she turns away. She waits, waits for him to say something, to start arguing, to apologise anything. She risks a final glance at him, but nothing. 

She doesn’t head for the other’s, for their little green room, she turns away shaking her head.

“Where are you going?”

“I don’t know,” She admits, “Home, maybe.”

“We’re on tour.”

She turns around, hair hitting her in the face, “Find another one of Adam’s childish cousins to help you.”

taglist

@thereisaplaceintheheart, @indierockgirrl, @sofaritsalrightt, @julezs-bl0g, @eaglestar31, @sophinthealpss, @noacfemcel, @if-my-heart-bleeds, @befrwime, @fallingforel, @sexorchocolateorpillowsorclouds, @3terna15unshin3, @1975sophie1975, @thesocraticjunkiewannabe, @littlesoldierelleora, @procrastinatinglikeapro

-let me know if you want to be added :)

[igotanidea]

Selflessness : Matt Murdock x fem!reader pt 1

Request: Ages ago (I'm so, so, sorry) @somest1 gave me an idea: in her free time from law school(*) reader does kind of volunteering - helping people in the church under the guidance of Matt's mom. Season 3 where he is healing in the church, so she basically helps him, but doesn't know who he is.

I changed it a bit and decided to divide it into parts (probably up to 3 or 4) but the main idea stays unchanged. Once again, I'm sorry and hope you enjoy it :)

***

„I’ve taken care of the kids in the room 6, sister Maggie. They seem unruly, but to tell the truth all they need is some care and attention.”

“Thank you, Y/N. You are a saint.” Sister Maggie Grace smiled lightly at the girl. Normally, she was far more reserved in her opinions and praises but this girl brought on the softer side of the nun.

“I assure you. I am not. I made a lot of mistakes in my life. Some worse than others.” Said girl looked down, a bit ashamed of her past.

“We all did, Y/N. What is important is that you are trying your best to do good. You help people.”

“I still think like I’m not doing enough….. Like there are so many men and women and kids who are suffering …..”

“You sound awfully like someone else I know…..”

“Really? Who?” that little tone of curiosity In her voice was not a good sign. Y/N was the nicest person even but also the one who wouldn’t take no for an answer. If she wanted to do or know something there was no power in earth, heaven or hell that would prevent her from it. She would charm her way around, getting exactly what she set her mind to.

“Doesn’t matter. But he has the tendency to put himself on the cross and take the pain and suffer from everyone in the name of greater good.”

“Seems like a charming person.” Y/N smirked

“Oh, you poor girl…..” Maggie sighed and shook her head. It was better to just distract her little helper from whatever was going on inside her head and heart “if you are done talking here, off you go. You might have covered for 6, but little Tom has been crying all night again. I have no idea why, but you are like the only person who can get to him, so why don’t you focus on the job?”

“On it, sister Maggie.” Y/N flashed her most beautiful smile and with her sunshine and rainbow attitude left the nun by herself.

“Don’t you think she could be the one to help our guest downstairs, Maggie?” the second Y/N was out of sight father Lantom emerged from the adhering porch.

“No.”

“Maggie.”

“No, Paul. I’m not putting her into this mess. She’s been through enough.”

“And you are wondering who Matt took his stubbornness after.” Lantom muttered, but it was done with his representative sympathy. He was not the one to mock people. “I’m just saying, that perhaps she will help him see the other side of life. Not all the darkness and evil. And bring him back up. She has a natural talent for it, and you know it.”

“If anything it would consume and crash her. Just like it did to Matt. I’m not letting another kid go through something like that.”

“She’s not a kid.” Lantom shrugged but turned serious under the nun’s stern gaze  “Just think about it Maggie, that’s all I’m asking.  She’s been through a lot and nothing broke her, so maybe she’s stronger than you presume.”

“Hm.” Maggie scoffed

“Promise me, you’ll consider it. You know I only want what’s best for both of them.”

“Fine, fine, I promise.” she threw her hands in the air “you are so persistent at times. God have mercy on us all if they were to meet.”

***

Y/N Y/L/N was a perfect kid. Obedient, helpful, cheerful. Great student coming from a good family. An only child, never causing any trouble. Listening to her parents, her teachers, her lecturers. Graduated with honors and getting her MD, even if it came as a surprise to those who knew her. She always gave an impression of a person who would focus rather on some humanistic studies like  literary science or philology.

Her choice however was deeply rooted in her past, in her good family heritage.

You know this saying that every family has its secret. Some of them have more than it seems, and sometimes so called good ones are truly the worst, after you strip them from all the window dressing and hypocrisy.

Y/N had to be good and avoid trouble. Otherwise, any manifestation of disobedience, even the slightest would be met with extensive punishment. Most of the times leaving her with literal bruises, that she had to learn to cover and in tears and sobs that she had to muffle to avoid harsh words and accusation of her being weak and pathetic. Both of her parents were esteemed at work, mum being a CEO and dad a computer programmer and were extremely busy. To say the least, they have little to no time to take care of a kid, more often than not leaving Y/N wondering why the hell did they decide to have one in the first place. Their relationship was based on the how was school, did you do your homework  and what grade did you get from the test questions. And that was only from her mother, her dad never cared enough to even form them. Excusing himself with tiredness and the argument that woman should be taking emotional care of the kid, especially a girl.

All things considered, Y/N was lonely. She did not really have any friends, because how can you form any relationship if you have no good patterns of how it should look like. How can you connect with someone when all you know are quiet evenings filled with work and avoiding another members of the family. What was surprising about her, was that despite all this gloominess and coldness stemming from her closest surrounding she developed this quiet, inner happiness, calmness and peace. When there was problem she was the one to keep straight head and solve it. When someone was in distress she was the one to ease the situation and placate the conflict. But despite that, she was lonely. Always looking for something more, trying to make it better for people who were less privileged then her. And that was how she ended up volunteering at the convent under sister Maggie’s guidance.

She quickly proved herself to be great working with kids, and Maggie warmed up to this optimistic, energetic soul in a way that surprised and delighted father Lantom. It’s been three years of her work there now and she gained sympathy and trust of both.

***

 “Hey there little guy” Y/N entered the room when Tommy was placed. His back was to the door but he turned around as soon as he heard the girl’s voice.

“Hi, miss Y/N.”

“Some little bird told me you had a hard night?”

“I wasn’t sleeping” he rubbed his eyes with fists, looking so small and fragile, Y/N heart was breaking.

“Come here.” she sat on the edge of the bed and opened her arms, in which the boy immediately dived in. This poor little one, abandoned by his mother was in desperate need of warmth and whatever little joy could be given. And Y/N was more than willing to give hugs to him. “Did you have nightmares, again?” he muttered something, hiding face in her sweater “come on, Tommy, I need you to use human language.” She laughed

“It was the clown.” He pulled away, a few tears dripping down his cheeks

“Again? Oh, you poor thing.” Y/N caressed his cheeks rubbing the water away “was it that guy at school again?”

“Yes. He’s making me scared…..”

“Don’t worry about it. I’ll settle that matter” she embraced him once again rocking gently from side to side “and in the meantime…..”

“Why is the time mean?”

“Oh, no, it’s not like….. “ the girl could not stop the giggle. Luckily the boy smiled as well, dispelling her worries that he might feel laughed at “ you know what, in fact, we are going to have a really, really nice time. I got a new book if you are interested. No clowns there. How does that sound?“

“Ok.” he mumbled

“Ok? Good. I’m gonna pick it up in just a second…..”

“Can you hug me some more?” the boy asked

“Sure, Tommy. We got time here.”

“Y/N?” Lantom was like a literal ghost, appearing out of shadows, out of nowhere “how’s out little fella doing?”

“I think it’s nothing  a good story and a serious talk with certain guy from room 11 could not fix.”

“Was it Anton again?”

“Mhm. Unfortunately. I’ll talk to him.”

“I think this boy may need some more seriousness than you can treat him with.”

“I can be serious.” She scoffed moving towards Lantom with twinge in her eyes, causing Tom to hold onto her tighter and  whimper.

“That’s good. Because we got one serious matter we need to discuss.”

“We being me and you, father?”

“We being you, me and sister Maggie.”

“Oh. I don’t know if I’m worthy enough.”

“You are the most trustworthy person we know, Y/N.”

“All right then. I’ll meet you after I make sure Tommy is taken care of.”

***

“You want to me to take care of a guy in the basement.” She repeated, both Lantom and Maggie watching her reaction carefully. She showed no emotions and it was hard to guess what was going inside her head. “Is he in need?”

“Yes.”

“All right then.” she shrugged “I’ll help.”

“Just like that? No more questions?”

“Why would I need any? If you trusted him enough to take him in. It’s not like he is the daredevil, right?" she smirked (not realising how shocked her interlocutors were for a moment) "So of course I’ll help. Should I go now?”

“You know the way.” Lantom managed to say, since Maggie couldn't force herself to say a word.

“On it, father.” she smiled, using her typical sentence and walked away.

“I think we made a mistake here, Paul.”

“She’ll be fine. She’s gentle but not naïve and know how to take care of herself.”

“I still think we made a mistake.”

to be continued (part 2 is up)

@pinksirensong

[askmattsworld]

Ello!

Hi there; welcome to my/our askblog! If it wasn't obvious enough, this is a Mattsworld askblog! This is nearly my first (and a half I'd say I suppose?) askblog since another of mine is partially dead-- but that's off track! I myself; Snoop, right now am only one person running the blog, so bear with me here since I'm a minor too. (Who's unfortunately in High School with low-running motivation most of the time.) Current Rules / Basic Criteria !! -- I'd prefer if you were 13+ and below like 20 or so; since as I said I'm a minor, and if any of my close friends were to help out or join the askblog; most if not all of them are minors themselves. (I can make arrangements for very close people though.) Respect everyone; that goes for commenters, askers, posters, mods, and I myself. -- Going along with that; unless canon drama, please keep any and every other drama away from this blog! I don't need anymore stress than I already have. Shipping? Sure; you can make some jokes and tease the characters, just please don't force it upon any of them. Since; in this version of my AU there probably won't be any relationships with any of the main 4. (Sorry..) May have headcanons/canons about sexualities and other stuff though!! <3 Obviously; no racism, homophobic, sexism, etc. Going along with the respect everyone rule. We/I am fine with weird people since I'm weird myself but if you're too weird than don't expect to not get weird remarks or looks. NO NSFW! Like I said; I. AM. A. MINOR !! I myself make some jokes about it from time to time; sure you can make some subtle jokes, just please do not send me like; per say a whole ass AO3 fanfiction of anyone getting pounded, please. No spamming -- as well as; none of these characters are connected to any IRL counterparts, ever. - - - NOW!! Yes-- asks ARE indeed open currently!! Any character is up for asks; I'm still trying to figure out some characters but here's the basic criteria of who's swapped with who !! Matt = Edd Tord = Tom Edd = Matt Tom = Tord I am perhaps thinking of swapping Kim and Katya with Bing and Larry. (Maybe.) Neighbours designs aren't made yet. ...Nor anyone besides the main four. I accept DID systems (non-endogenic.) and Fictionkins here! IRLs are allowed too I guess. Just a warning for those in that criteria and other people in general!! Yes; there's going to be funny silly comedy moments, but also ANGSTY moments with BLOOD/GORE and LORE !! Keep that in mind. Annnddd, that's it! Enjoy your stay; lads! :D

[therecordchanger62279]

THE PORTAL

Short Fiction

     Anytime the inspector stops by my office close to quitting time can only spell trouble for me, and today was no exception.

     “Inspector, what can I do for you?”

     “Matt, I need you to drive over to St. Augustine and look into a possible suicide on the Bridge of Lions about a half hour ago.”

     “St. Augustine? Why-“

     “They’re short-handed right now. Dave Coates retired several weeks ago, and they’ve got somebody on vacation, so they called and asked for some help. I thought of you because I know how much you love surprises. There’s a black & white on the scene right now, and I told them you were on the way. Some guy took a jump off the bridge while the drawbridge was raised. He was in a cab, and stepped out for a cigarette, and the cabbie heard a splash and the guy was nowhere to be found. Talk to the cabbie, and see what else you can turn up. Probably just somebody depressed about The Jaguars.”

     “I didn’t think anyone down here cared enough about that team to kill themselves over it.”

     “No, probably not. Don’t forget to call your wife, and tell her you won’t be home for dinner.”

     “Yeah, I’ll do that. She’ll be thrilled.”

     And as he walked out of the office, I picked up the phone and dialed. I dreaded what was coming next.

     “Terry, have you started dinner yet?”

     “Don’t you dare tell me you’re coming home late again!”

     “I’m sorry, but the inspector is sending me to St. Augustine on a case. Probably routine, but, I won’t-“

     “Matt, I’m getting tired of this. You’re never home anymore. Janie doesn’t even remember what you look like. I’m beginning to think you should’ve stayed where you were and we never should’ve left Georgia.”

     “Don’t say that, honey. You know how hard I worked to make detective. This kind of thing comes with the job.”

     “ Yeah, I know. How late do you think you’ll be?”

     “ I’d expect to be home no later than 10 – maybe earlier if it turns out to be routine.”

     “Why do you have to go to St. Augustine? I thought you were a detective with the Jacksonville Police Department?”

     “It’s a long story. I’ll tell you about it when I get home.”

     “If I’m still up.”

     We said our goodbyes and I grabbed my jacket and headed out to my car. The drive to St. Augustine would take a little less than an hour if there weren’t any traffic tie-ups. It’s a straight shot down 95 South to US 1. I figured I’d stop to fill up, and get a cold sandwich on the way. Lately, cold sandwiches are a staple of my diet.

_____

     As I came upon the Bridge of Lions near St. Augustine, I saw lights from the cruiser, and two officers – one sitting on the hood of his black & white, and the other leaning against the driver side door. In front of them was parked a Red Cab with the driver at the front staring into space.

     “Hi, I’m Detective Matt Reed, Jacksonville P.D. Sorry for the wait.”

     “Officer Tom Billings, and this is my partner Officer Scott McCowan.”

     We all shook hands and exchanged pleasantries, and then got down to business.

     “So what’s the story? Somebody jumped off the bridge?”

     Billings did the talking, “Looks like. The cabdriver is a little spooked. He was taking his fare from the Ghost Tour-

     “The what?”

     “The Ghost Tour. You know?”

     “What’s the Ghost Tour?”

     “Where did you say you were from, Detective?”

     “I just moved to Jacksonville a couple of months ago from Atlanta.”      “Oh, OK. So you’re not real familiar with St. Augie’s.”

     “Not really, no.”

     “Well it’s a tourist hangout. Lots of things to see and do. And there are parts of the city that are said to be haunted, and The Ghost Tours are a chance for tourists to visit all the supposedly haunted spots in the city while riding in a hearse.”

     “You’re serious?”

     “’Fraid so. Anyway, the cabbie’s fare was just returning from The Ghost Tour, and he was heading back to his hotel. When they reached the bridge, there was a boat passing through, and they had to wait while the drawbridge was raised to let it pass. The guy asked the cabbie if he could step out for a minute and have a cigarette, and the cabdriver told him to go ahead. A couple of minutes later, the cabbie says he heard a splash, and when he got out of the cab, the guy was nowhere to be seen.”

     “So he didn’t actually see him jump.”

     “No, but he must have. He couldn’t have just vanished, so he must’ve gone over the side.”

     “How do you know he didn’t fall?”

     “He left his shoes on the bridge, and the cab fare on the back seat. Tip and everything.”

     “So he planned to jump?”

     “It looks that way,” said Billings.

     “Wait a minute. How did he know the drawbridge would be raised as they were passing? If that hadn’t happened he wouldn’t have had the opportunity to get out of the cab.”

     “We thought of that, but if he’s a local, he might’ve known that the bridge is raised every evening at that time to let a boat from the Scenic Cruises Tour pass through on its last run of the day.”

     “If he’s a local why is he doing the tourist thing?”

     “Some locals do. It’s not unheard of. Besides he gave the cabbie a local address.”

     “Maybe he was staying with relatives. Did you run the address yet?”

     “Yeah, it’s over on Valencia. Residential neighborhood. 1647.”

     “I don’t know. Doesn’t add up. I’ll talk to the cabbie. Did he say-“

     “He didn’t give us much except a description of the guy. He told us the guy was pleasant and made small talk with him, but other than that, nothing.”

     “Are there divers in the water?”

     “Yeah, they’ve been in about 15 minutes, but as windy as it is, and with these currents, the guy could be half way to Havana by now.”

     “Well maybe we’ll catch a break. Let me go talk to the driver. Got a name?”

     “Sherman Davis. But everybody just calls him “Sherm”.”

     “Is that right? Well let’s go talk to “Sherm”.”

     I walked over to the Red Cab, and pulled out my badge and introduced myself to Sherman Davis.

     “Mr. Davis? Detective Reed, Jacksonville P.D. If you don’t mind, I’d like to ask you some questions about what happened?”

     Sherman Davis had been turned the opposite direction facing the water. As he turned around, I noticed he was shaking.

     “Mr. Davis? You ok?”

     “Yeah, I guess so. You don’t have a cigarette do you?”

     “No, sorry. I don’t smoke.”

     “That’s ok. I quit about six months ago, but I thought just one might calm my nerves. I never seen nothin’ like this in all my years drivin’ cab.”

     “Why don’t you start from the beginning, and tell me exactly what happened. Go slow, and don’t leave anything out. Anything you can remember might help us figure this out.”

     “Alright. Well, it’d been a slow night. I’d only had a couple of fares all evening. So I decided to drive over to the Ghost Tours to see if I could get a fare when the last ride pulled in. Most people have rentals if they’re out-of-towners, and the locals have their own cars, but every once in awhile, somebody needs a cab. Anyway, this guy sees me parked by the gate, and flags me down and says he’d like a ride back home.”

     “Did he tell you where home was?”

     “Before I could ask the address, he asked me if we could drive across the Bridge of Lions.”

     “Did he say why?”

     “No, and I didn’t think nothin’ of it. Figured he was a tourist, and he wanted to see it.”

     “But the address he gave you was on Valencia. That’s a residential neighborhood. So he must be a local, right?”

     “Maybe. I mean, I guess that makes sense. He never said where he was from.”      “Did he seem familiar with the area at all?”

     “Yeah, he seemed to know a bit about it. But nothin’ you couldn’t get from readin’ a travel brochure or talkin’ to Triple A or the chamber of commerce.”

     “When you got to the bridge and you saw the drawbridge lights blinking, you must have told him there’d be a delay?”

     “Yeah, and he didn’t care. Said he wasn’t in a hurry.”

     “That’s all?”

     “That’s all.”

     “So go on…..your cab is stopped on the bridge. What happened next?”

     “He asks me if I mind if he gets out to stretch his legs a bit, and have a cigarette while the boat passes. And I says, go ahead. Figured he ain’t going anywhere, so why not?”

     “How long was it before you heard the splash?”

     “Couldn’t have been more than a minute or so. I got out of the cab – never thinkin’ – well, the splash could’ve been a fish or somethin’ tossed off the boat. I never in a million years figured a guy’d just jump off the bridge like that.”

     “When did you realize he’d gone over the side?”

     “I didn’t see him, and I called out, but there was no answer. Then I saw his shoes over by the edge. That’s when I knew he’d jumped.”

     Davis was shaking again, and I doubted I’d get much else out of him tonight. So I decided to wind things up.

     “Mr. Davis, I appreciate your cooperation. I’m going to give you one of my cards. If you can think of anything you left out, call me collect at the Jacksonville P.D. The number is at the bottom. I may be in touch with you again if I have any more questions. Okay?”

     “Yeah, sure. Whatever you need.”

     “Are you feeling well enough to drive, Mr. Davis?”

     “Yeah, I’ll be okay. I’m headin’ straight back to the hub. I’m done for tonight. At least the guy didn’t stiff me on the fare.”

     “He paid upfront?”

     “No. When I got back to the cab to call the hub to tell them what happened and to call the police, I found 50 bucks on the back seat?”

     “In a wallet?”

     “No, just fifty bucks. The fare wouldn’t have been anywhere near that unless he had me drivin’ all over the place. But I guess he didn’t want to leave me in the lurch. Most people wouldn’t have bothered. Did you guys need that money for evidence or somethin’? I didn’t even think to mention it to the two cops.”

     “No, you can keep it. We have the shoes. Maybe we can run DNA from that if we don’t find the body so we can figure out who he is.”

     “You sure? I could give you part of it?”

     “Part of a fifty dollar bill?”

     “He didn’t give me a fifty. He left 10 five dollar bills.”

     “Ten five dollar bills?”

     “Yeah. I didn’t think too much about it. If he was tourin’ some of the city, he might’ve changed out larger bills to pay for incidentals, and stuff. Maybe he was afraid of carrying big bills, too. Some people are like that. Especially when they travel.”

     “Yeah, well, we still don’t know if he was a local.”

     “Yeah, I guess so.”

     “Never mind. You call me if you think of anything else. Drive safe.”

     And with that, I saw him back to his cab. After he pulled away, I walked back down to the black & white to see if the divers had come up yet. Billings saw me coming, and spoke first.

     “Any luck detective?”

     “Not much more than he told you. Are the divers up yet?”

     “Yeah, just surfaced a few minutes ago. They didn’t find a thing. The currents are getting stronger, and they’re going to stop for tonight and try again first thing in the morning. But they said we shouldn’t get our hopes up. The body is probably in the middle of the Atlantic by now.”

     It was too late to get anything else done by then, so I got back in my car and headed home. With a little luck I’d get a kiss when I got there instead of a cold shoulder. Tomorrow I’d be heading back to St. Augustine to try and figure out who John Doe was and why he’d want to jump off a bridge into the Atlantic Ocean.

_____

     The next morning I got up early to stop by the office, and then a get a bite at the Breakfast Hut before I made the drive back to St. Augustine to resume my investigation. Terry was still up when I got back the night before, and she’d cooled off a bit when I explained what I was investigating. I’d peaked into Janie’s room, too, and watched her sleep for a few moments before closing the door again. I wasn’t seeing enough of my daughter, but one day when she resented me for it, I’d remind her that the time away from home was spent making money to buy her a cell phone, and hundreds of pairs of shoes, and a prom dress, and college tuition, and a wedding, too, probably. But I resolved not to let the balance get too far out of hand. Some guy jumps off a bridge, and I miss dinner with my wife and kid. Selfish bastard.

     When I stopped by the office, I told the inspector what happened with the investigation and where I’d be that day, and what I’d be doing. He told me to check in with him after lunch and bring him up to speed. I drove over to the Breakfast Hut to get something to eat, and grab a cup of coffee to go for the trip. I wasn’t three feet inside the door when I heard my name.

     “Matt! Matt Reed! Over here!”

     At a table in the corner was Spencer Donohoe. I owed Spencer my job since it was his retirement a few months ago from the Jacksonville P.D. that resulted in my making detective after all those years in a squad car in Atlanta.

     “Hey Spence! How are you? Good to see you!”

     “You, too Matt. Sit down and let me buy you breakfast.”

     “How about letting me buy for both of us? After all, I’m a working stiff, and you’re an ex-cop on a fixed income now.”

     “Fair enough. How’s my old job these days? You haven’t embarrassed the department or brought any shame to the city have you?”

     “Not yet. But there’s still time.”

     That got a big laugh. Spence spent two weeks training me before he walked away after 32 years on the force. He made the transition to a new city and a new job much easier than it otherwise might’ve been, and I considered him a friend because of it. But it’d been at least a couple of months since I’d seen him.

     “So what are you working on? Anything that might make me wish I hadn’t retired at such a young age?”

     “I doubt it. Unless a suicide in St. Augustine interests you?”

     “St. Augustine? What are you doing over there?”

     “Ah, they’re short-staffed and the inspector sent me over there to look into a suicide. Some guy took a dive off the Bridge of Lions last night waiting for the drawbridge to close.”

     I filled him in on the whole thing while we waited for the waitress to bring us some coffee.

     “You know, that’s not the first suicide off that bridge. There’s a whole history of them dating back to when that bridge was first built.”

     “No kidding?”

     “Yeah. I remember talking to Dave Coates – he was a buddy of mine worked the St. Augie’s P.D.” –

     “Just retired, right? He’s the reason I’m on this case now.”

     “That’s him. Anyway, I remember he investigated a suicide off that bridge about five years ago. Teenage girl from Indiana, I think it was. Down here on vacation with her parents, and they were in a cab coming back from seeing the sights, and same thing happened. While the drawbridge was up, she got out of the cab for some fresh air, and she goes over the side. Funny coincidence.”

     “You say suicides are common off that bridge?”

     “Well, maybe common isn’t the right word. But there’ve been a few. There’s even an old wives tale about that bridge and the suicides that dates back to the middle 1930’s, not long after the bridge was built.”

      Our breakfasts had arrived, and while we ate, Spence related to me a strange story about the history of the Bridge of Lions, and the suicides that have taken place there. I didn’t think it was more than a coincidence, but it stayed in my mind and after we finished breakfast and said our goodbyes, I headed back to St. Augustine. I thought it might be worthwhile to talk to some locals. Maybe I could find somebody who could tell me more about the bridge’s history and the legend that surrounds it.

_____

     My first stop when I reached St. Augie’s was the police station. I needed to get a status report on the investigation from their end, and to find out if the divers had found the body yet. I also wanted to be sure they were combing the missing persons reports from around the area to see if anyone fitting John Doe’s sketchy description – male in his late 50’s, balding, about 6 ft., 190 (can’t be many of those around) had been reported missing. I spoke with Officers Billings and McCowan as they were about to head back to the bridge to oversee the morning dive. They’d run the missing persons reports, but had come up empty. So, I suggested they expand the search statewide. If we were looking for a local, that should turn something. If Doe was a tourist, we’d have to look nationwide. But for the moment, because of the local address, we decided to assume he was local. The shoes found on the bridge had also been sent to the lab, but those results wouldn’t likely be back for a couple of days.

     I grabbed a cup of coffee, and decided to drive over to 1647 Valencia to check out the address John Doe had given the cabbie. The neighborhood was quiet, looked to be fairly well-kept, and 1647 had a sign in the front yard that read “Room For Rent”. I parked on the street, and walked past the front gate and up the steps and knocked on the door. The woman who opened it looked to be in her 70’s.

     “Can I help you?”

     “Yes, ma’am. I’m Detective Matt Reed from the Jacksonville P.D. I wonder if I could ask you some questions?” as I flashed her my badge.

     “Well, certainly. What’s this all about?”

     She gave her name as Joanne Devane.

     “Well, ma’am, last night we had a report of a man who jumped off the Bridge of Lions and we’re trying to identify him. He was in a cab, and the cab was stopped on the bridge when he got out and jumped. The address he gave the cab driver was this one, and I wanted to see if you might be able to help us identify him? I noticed you have a room for rent. Do you take in boarders?”

     “Yes I do. My son married and moved away several years ago, and my husband passed last year. I needed a little extra to live on, so my son suggested I rent the upstairs room. But my latest tenant vacated yesterday morning.”

     “Can you give me a description?”

     “Certainly. He was about your size, an older man, though – maybe 60, didn’t have much hair on top, and what he did have was gray. You don’t think he’s the man that jumped off the bridge, do you?”

     “From your description, ma’am, he could be. What else can you tell me about him? Name, where he was from – anything at all you can remember would be helpful?”

     “His name was Joseph – Joseph Anderle – no ‘y’. He told me he was from Cincinnati, Ohio, and that he was all alone, and wanted to find a place to live down here. Said he always vacationed in St. Augustine, and he’d been laid off his job in Cincinnati, and decided now was the time to move down here.”

     “How long had he been here?”

     “Well, let’s see...I think he moved in about four months ago. Yes, that’s right because I remember he paid me the first three months rent in advance, in cash. And then just this past week he gave me this month’s rent, and told me he’d be moving out this week. He said he’d found something more permanent. I hated to lose him. He was such a nice man. Very quiet, and polite. The perfect boarder. I hope I’m as lucky with the next one.”

     “ By any chance did you run any sort of background check on him before you rented to him?”

     “I called the St. Augie’s police department to make sure he had no criminal record. They didn’t have anything on him.”

     “Did you call his last place of employment or the last place he rented from?”

     “Well he owned a house, and told me he’d sold it. And the place he was working went out of business. So I left it at that.”

     “Is there anything else you can remember? Did he ever talk about having any family – sons, daughters, a wife? Any relatives at all?”

     “No he never mentioned anyone to me. We didn’t talk a lot. He wasn’t here that much. And when we did pass, we just exchanged hellos. As long as he was behaving, I left him on his own. I thought he must be all alone in the world.”

     “What makes you think so?”

     “Well you know how people are. They like to talk about their loved ones. They especially like to dote on their kids or grandkids.”

     “I suppose so. Okay Mrs. Devane. I appreciate your help. I’m going to give you one of my cards. You can call me collect at the Jacksonville P.D. – that’s where I’m based – or give the St. Augie’s P.D. a call if you think of anything you might have forgotten. I appreciate your cooperation.”

     “Certainly Detective. I hope you can get this all resolved. I sure hope that wasn’t Mr. Anderle, though. He was such a nice man. Why would anyone want to do that?”

     “That’s the question I’d most like to answer Mrs. Devane. Thanks again for your help.”

     Well at least now I had a name. I called the station and asked them to run Joseph Anderle through the database to see what turned up. Meanwhile, I drove over to the St. Augustine City Hall. I wanted to look through the records on the history of the Bridge of Lions, and then try to find someone who could give me some information about the bridge’s mythical history. Before I left City Hall, I also did some more checking on the city’s history.

     The search of the bridge’s history was pretty standard stuff. The bridge was originally built in the late 1920’s, and then rebuilt again in 1999 after safety became a concern. If I were going to get anything else, I’d have to find a local with a long history in the city. Since St. Augustine is named after one of the great religious figures of history, the logical place to begin seemed to me to be a church. Might as well begin at the beginning - that would be The Cathedral Basilica of Saint Augustine – established in 1565 – a church as old as the city itself.

       When I arrived at The Cathedral Basilica I was awestruck by its beauty. I was raised Catholic, but I hadn’t been to church in years. But I still appreciate a beautiful church when I see one, and this one was breathtaking. Of course, the kind of help I was looking for was not the kind you usually seek in a church. But I seemed to be making progress on this beautiful Florida morning. Maybe my luck was changing?

     I walked into the door marked ‘Office’ and found a receptionist who greeted me immediately and asked if she could help. I asked to speak with the church’s pastor, and she directed me down the hallway to the office of Father Paul Wills. I knocked, and Father Wills answered.

     “Can I help you?”

     Father Wills looked to be at least 80 if he was a day. He was dressed in black, collar on. He wore round wire rim spectacles, but still had a silver head of hair to go with a face that had more lines in it than a roadmap.

     “Father, I’m Detective Matt Reed from the Jacksonville P.D. I’m in St. Augustine investigating an apparent suicide last night on the Bridge of Lions, and I have some questions about the bridge’s history and I thought I might start here since the Cathedral is as old as the city, and you’ve been the resident pastor here since the 1950’s.”

     “Certainly, Mr. Reed. Please come in. I’d be happy to help in any way I can. You say there was a suicide? Was it one of my parishioners?”

     “I don’t believe so, father – unless you know a Joseph Anderle?”

     “Anderle. No, I don’t believe I recall an Anderle.”

     “Well, Father, this is really more about a bit of history regarding that bridge that was given to me by one of my colleagues. He suggested I find someone who might be an expert on the legend of-“

     He finished the sentence for me.

     “The legend of the portal?”

     “Well it seems I’ve come to right place.”

     “Won’t you have a seat Detective? Can I have my receptionist get you a cup of coffee?”

     “No, thank you Father. I’m fine. What I really want is to ask you some questions about this legend?”

     “Certainly. I’m a bit of a historian, and I’ve made it my business to learn as much about the city and its history as possible. I’m an old man, Detective, but I’m afraid I don’t go back as far as when the bridge was built. But I’ve lived here all my life and the portal legend is about as old as I am.”

     “Father, I have no idea if what I was told about the legend has any bearing on this suicide at all. But it might help the investigation if I knew why Mr. Anderle decided to take his own life this way.”

     “Well the legend dates back to the middle 1930’s not long after the bridge was built. The story goes that a young man committed suicide off that bridge in 1936 after a young woman he wanted to marry had denied him. The young man’s mother was so distraught over it that she became convinced that her son was condemned to hell for eternity for taking his own life. The Catholic Church has long taught that killing of any kind is a mortal sin, and punishable by an eternity in hell. The bishop of the parish at the time had told her as much when she wrote him requesting his intercession in the matter. She believed if the bishop absolved the boy, he would be spared. But the bishop would not absolve him. So, she turned to a fortune teller who had a shop in the tourist district back then – a Madame Mendoza. She hoped to make contact with her son’s spirit and get him to renounce his act so that his soul might be spared. Madame Mendoza did a reading for the woman and told her that her son’s body had perished, but that his spirit – his soul – had survived and had been sucked into a portal beneath the east statue of the lion at the end of the bridge – the side that points towards the Atlantic.”

     “That’s the side Mr. Anderle jumped from.”

     “I’m not surprised. That’s true of all of the suicides from that bridge.”

     “I didn’t mean to interrupt you, Father. Please continue?”

     “Well Madame Mendoza told the woman that the portal was a place where souls in jeopardy can escape damnation and be redeemed and accepted into heaven. She assured the woman her son’s soul had escaped into the portal, and he had found peace.”

     “Where in the world did the fortune teller get that notion from?”

     “That’s a question I’ve never found an answer for. In all my research, as far as I can tell, Madame Mendoza invented the legend of the portal to satisfy the woman. If she gave comfort to the woman when even her religion could not, it was far more likely the woman would pay her handsomely.”

     “How did the legend get around then?”

     “Word of mouth. The woman probably told everyone she knew that her son had found peace. And Madame Mendoza’s reputation only grew. She ran her business in the district until the city closed it down in a citywide crackdown of fraud in the late 1950’s. That much I do remember. I’d been here as pastor for about a year when that happened. But over the years, there had been three more suicides off that bridge under similar circumstances, and in each case, the word got around that the souls of the departed had escaped an afterlife in hell by passing through the portal. I think that God-fearing people who’d come to a place in their lives where suicide looked to be the only escape, used the legend as a means of comforting them that their decision would not lead them to hell if they jumped from that spot on the bridge.”

     “Do you believe that Father?”

     “Of course not, Detective. There are myths and legends, and there is religion. Different people believe different things for different reasons.”

     “But how different is believing in the eternal fires of hell from believing a magic portal exists that can save your soul?”

     “Are you Catholic, Detective?”

     “I’m lapsed, Father, but not so lapsed that I would lie to a priest, and certainly not inside a Cathedral.”

     He smiled and then asked, “So do you believe what the Catholic Church taught you?”

     “You mean that if you take your own life, you’ll burn in hell? To be honest, I never thought much about it. Do you believe it Father?”

     “No, I don’t. I believe in a loving and merciful God. And no God that is loving and merciful could ever condemn a suffering and lost soul or a man in such despair he would take his own life. I have no idea if your Mr. Anderle knew of the legend or whether or not he was Catholic. All I can tell you for certain is that he found great despair if he was moved to take his own life. I suspect if you keep digging, Detective Reed, you’ll find the cause of that despair, and the resolution to your investigation.”

     “Can I ask you one last question, Father?”

     “Certainly.”

     “Had you been bishop of the parish in 1936 when the woman asked you to absolve her son, would you have absolved him?”

     “I would have.“

     “Even if it meant going against the church’s teachings?”

     “Detective, as far as I’m concerned, no religion, and no belief system has any merit or worth if it fails to comfort someone in their time of need. People believe in things they don’t understand because they seek comfort and peace of mind. Had the bishop comforted the woman whose son had taken his life, it’s possible more lives might’ve been spared down the road.”

     “That’s pretty ironic, don’t you think, Father?”

     “How do you mean?”

     “The bishop would’ve needed to suspend or deny his own beliefs to comfort the woman from what she had been taught that was meant to comfort her.”

      Father Wills chuckled. “I never thought of it that way, but you’re absolutely right, detective.”

     “Father, thank you for your time. I appreciate it very much.”

     “Was I of any help at all?”

     “Yes, Father, you were. I realize now that if I can understand and learn more about Mr. Anderle’s past, I’ll find the answer to why he took his own life. And if he left behind any family, maybe that will give them some comfort.”

     “I hope so, detective. I hope so.”

     When I reached the car I called the station to get an update. The news was all bad. The divers had turned up nothing in the waters. There was nothing from missing persons on a Joseph Anderle. And, in fact, there was no Joseph Anderle from Cincinnati either. All I had now was a John Doe that committed suicide off The Bridge of Lions in St. Augustine – the fifth suicide off that bridge since 1936. Over the next few days I went back to Jacksonville, and awaited word on the DNA test on John Doe’s shoes. They’d found nothing. There was no match in the database. So there was no criminal record, and when we expanded the search for missing persons to include the entire country, and that turned up nothing, it looked as if the trail had gone cold.

_____

     A couple of months later I was sitting in my office finishing up some paperwork, and getting ready to call it a day and go home to a nice dinner with my wife and daughter when my secretary buzzed me.

     “Yeah, Kate. What is it?”

     “Detective, there’s a private investigator that would like to speak with you.”

     “What about?”

     “A missing person. He’s come all the way from Indiana.”

     “Indiana? Ok, send him in.”

     In through the door came a short, stocky man who looked to be in his late 50’s wearing a hat and a raincoat, but with no umbrella to protect him from the thunderstorm outside. I extended my hand.

     “Detective Matt Reed.”

     “Thanks for seeing me, Detective. I’m Phil Chandler. I’m a P.I. from Lawrenceburg, Indiana. I’m investigating a missing persons case, and I thought maybe you might be able to help me. The St. Augustine P.D. sent me.”

     “St. Augustine’s?”

     “Yeah, I was there first, but they sent me to you.”

     “What’s this about Mr. Chandler?”

     “I’m looking for a man that went missing about eight months ago. I’m just about at the end of the line, too, and you’re my last hope. The Lawrenceburg P.D. gave up on it two months ago, and the man’s wife hired me to try and do what the police couldn’t – find out what happened to her husband.”

     “Well I have to say, you’re a pretty dedicated investigator to come all this way.”

     “Well I’m a friend of the family – the wife anyway – and I wanted to try and help.”

     “So what connection does an Indiana missing person have with Florida?”

     “I’m not really sure. I was just playing a hunch. And as I said, I’m out of places to look. The missing person is Jeffrey Allison of West Harrison, Indiana. West Harrison is a small town in southern Indiana not far from Lawrenceburg. He went missing about eight months ago. There was no evidence of foul play - which is probably why the police were ready to let it go. Allison took several thousand dollars in cash out of a retirement fund he had, and he disappeared. No one has heard from him since. I mean there’s not even a paper trail. No credit card activity. Nothing at all.”

     “But you must’ve had a reason for coming all this way to look for him.”

     “Well it’s a long shot, but his family use to vacation every year in St. Augustine – until about 5 years ago when they were down here on a vacation and their teenage daughter committed suicide by jumping off the Bridge of Lions. The family was very distraught over it, of course, and when I talked to Mrs. Allison, she told me her husband had never really gotten over it. They tried therapy, and he was even prescribed medication for depression, but nothing seemed to help. Anyway, when I went to St. Augustine to do some fishing on the case, the P.D. there told me you’d been here a couple of months back investigating a suicide off the Bridge of Lions. The description they had is close to Allison’s and they suggested I speak with you.”

     “We never found a body, Mr. Chandler. The name we had – Joseph Anderle – turned out to be fake. None of our searches turned up a thing. Not even a DNA test. And the man we were trying to identify appeared to be from Cincinnati, Ohio. But we couldn’t even verify that. All we could verify is that our John Doe had no criminal record, and there was nobody by the name of Joseph Anderle from Cincinnati, Ohio.”

     “Well, I may be out on a limb here, detective, but West Harrison is just a few miles from Cincinnati. The suicides happened at the same place and on the same day-“

     “-the same day?”

     “Yeah, exactly five years earlier is when Allison’s daughter jumped – according to police records on both cases. And, I just thought of this….the name you gave me has the same initials as Jeffrey Allison – J.A.”

     “So you think Allison went missing because of what happened to his daughter and eight months later he does what his daughter did from, what? – grief?”

     “I think it’s possible.”

     “Maybe. But I don’t know. You’re making a lot of connections that might be coincidental. Anyway, there’s no way to be certain since we never found a body.”

     “Well there is one thing we could do.”

     “What’s that?”

      “When Allison went missing, the West Harrison police sent DNA samples to the lab in Lawrenceburg in case anything was found that might be able to identify Allison. But since nothing ever was, the DNA was never tested. If we run that DNA, there’s a chance it might match the DNA from your John Doe. I mean I think it’s worth a try, don’t you?”

     I had to admit, he had a point. And it was really our only chance to solve both cases. We agreed and we called the lab here in Jacksonville and asked them to send the sample up to Lawrenceburg. Two weeks later, we had our answer.

_____

     “What is it Kate?”

     “Detective, there’s a phone call for you on line 2 from a Phil Chandler, long distance from Indiana.”

     “Thanks Kate.”

     I picked up line two.

    “Detective Reed?”

    “Chandler? What did you find?”

    “It’s a match. Jeffrey Allison was your John Doe. I don’t know what happened to him in the eight months from the time he left home till the time he jumped off the bridge, but it’s clear he never was able to come to terms with his daughter’s suicide. I just wanted to call you and let you know so you guys could close the case once and for all.”

     “Thanks, Chandler. I appreciate that. I hope Mrs. Allison knows how lucky she is to have found somebody like you that would see this through. Most P.I.’s would’ve quit on it long ago.”

     “Well we go back to high school together. I had to try and help.”

     “How’d she take the news?”

     “I’m about to head over there. I called you first – probably to give myself a little more time to work up the courage to tell her that her husband took his own life the same way her daughter did. There’s no easy way to give news like that.

     “I’m curious, Chandler. Is the family Catholic?”

     “As a matter of fact, they are. Why?”

     I told Chandler the legend of the portal. I thought maybe it might help Mrs. Allison if she thought her daughter’s and husband’s souls had been saved by it. But it would be very small comfort in the face of unimaginable grief.

     As I drove home that evening, I thought about a lot of things. I thought about my own Catholic upbringing. I thought about my wife and daughter. I thought about the things people choose to believe and why. And then I remembered something about the investigation I’d forgotten. Allison must’ve been trying to send his own message when he paid that cabdriver in five dollar bills. But it was too late to matter. I hope Allison knew the legend of the portal, and I hoped he believed it heart and soul.

© 2023

[katielovably]

Edd sighed. Out of all the Toms why do we have the one who is a complete alcoholic? Edd muttered Tom smirked at Edd and Tord (two there when he was dumped into the dumpster) like this was pay back... but it makes Edd want to put him back even more. raccoon lad.

Tom stumbled to the closest bed which he claimed as him and the Tords claimed the second bed earlier....

Tom, cut it out.Edd said running forward and attempting to stop Tom from going threw his stuff and throwing out stuff (a form of revenge for his alcohol) ending in the... third... fifth... tenth (Edd lost count) fight between the two. Edd unfortunately lost ending up on the floor. Tom trying to eat all the food they had but Tord . Manged to stop him by tying him up, bounding both arms and legs, a bandanna was used as a gag to silence him. Tord sighed walking backwards tripping over Edd who was in awe by Tord's handy work to get up.

Oof. The two said looking.

baby Matt gasped and crawled to the side of the bed looking down at them.

*Norwegian curse* Edd, what are you doing still on the floor. Tord said picking himself up, babyMatt looked up at him then Edd.

Sorry. Edd said not able to make up an excuse on why he's there.

Tord helped him again insuring Edd's ok before sitting with the baby on his lap, just happy to be there... and no one got hurt in the "battles" they went through.

Edd who hadn't slept the past few days passed out when he's head hit the pillow as they watched some Telly.

Makes sense why he was acting like he was. Edd heard Tord say as he slept.

When Edd woke up hours later, Tom was freed. Sobber at that point he has calmed down... maybe still mad. Edd watched with baby Matt in his lap as Tord untied Tom. His eyes cool and focused but still ready to fight if Tom isn't finished fighting. Tord was finished and took the babe again. Tom didn't move making Tord and Edd to look at each other with concern and Edd came to Tom's side.

Merp. Rango said at Edd's side paws on Tom's arm before hopping completely on him. Tom looked up at the cat

Oh, thank god. Edd said laying back on the bed as Tom stoked its soft fur before looking up at Edd.

What do you mean "oh, thank God." I was sleeping until Rango woke me. Tom said sitting up still petting the cat who loved it.

You didn't feel Tord untie you? You didn't move? We thought maybe.... I'm fine, Edd.

Tord watched and rolled his eyes going back to watching Return of the Insane Zombie Pirates from Hell lll.

Edd tried his money plan of selling his art put it really didn't help considering he would get £40 or £60. Which isn't a lot of money for hours of sitting on streets drawing when he did have people wanting his drawings (which isn't often) the third day coming back to the hotel he side looking a the £40 he had gathered that day.

Looking for a way to make money? He heard looking up at the lady behind the front desk.

Sadly we do but don't know how. Edd said.

Alright, simple. Bring me resumes and I can see what I can do. She said.

Really? He said.

Beats sitting on the streets. She said.

I'll see what I can do. Thank you so much. Edd said and ran up stairs to the room and telling the others.

Where are we going to get resumes. We never worked. Tom said.

I can get you resumes don't worry about it. Tord said stretching.

How do you to do that? Tom said getting his head patted by Tord.

Don't worry about it. Tord said slipping out.

Um, ok. Edd said. Q

After Tord mysteriously got resumes for all of them (even blackeyedTord whose now Odin appae, handing them in to the woman at the front desk.

Next day they got news Tord and Edd were waiters for the dinner and "Odin" and Tom were cleaners.... which means Baby Matt and Rango would be alone while they worked (Rango is fine probably perfer it).

First day of work was there. The woman, Anne at the front desk had a high chair beside her.

Hey, you two. Go through that door and they'll show you what to do. I'll watch the baby. She said making face, making the baby giggle. Tord passed him over away.

Say goodbye, Dada. She said making the baby waves as they walked.

Tord took his lead.

Dada? Tord just brought the baby to the car we don't know where he came from. Edd thought as he fallowed him (still not convinced the baby is Matt).

They worked. Edd was nervous Tord might fight someone who pushed him. But he remained cool and calm... or he looked it. Even talking and joking with people, Edd heard him talking in Norwegian at one point.

Edd was nervous of this but he did a good job of doing the job after work were set of trying to figure things out money wise (it would be easier if not for the baby)

Soon Edd and Tord was done working on the third week. Tord picked up "his son" from Anne, finding Edd laying on the bed changed out his uniform.

Oooo. He heard from the baby as Tord stood over him.

You really should take that baby back where you found or... take him back? Tord said looking at the baby.

Oh-no. Edd would never be able to stand up against a pissed off Tord.

Tord set the baby down in the cradle and changed.

Let's take him back. Tord said

Wait, what? Edd said sitting up.

You a genius. Tord said.

I... I am? Edd said slipping on a black jacket before passing Edd's his and picking up the baby, putting him in a jacket, scarf, mittens and beanie.

The baby gave him a look of "your over reaching"

What? I heard it's cold. Tord said setting the baby down slipping on gloves Edd fallowed his lead and together the two (plus baby Matt) walked out slipping out a sidedoor. Edd seeing Tom peek out the door of the room he was in as the door closed behind them. Edd fallowed Tord.

(Part 6 of 7)

[michu-writes]

can i have some comfort from the eddsworld main 4? Me and my boyfriend have been fighting a lot and i'm really sad. It can be platonic or not:(

A/N: Of course I can! I'm so sorry about you and your boyfriend :(. I really hope the fighting ends! Please enjoy <3.

Edd

Edd is oblivious. If you're really good at hiding your feelings, he'd just think that you're completely okay. You have to tell him if you're feeling down or not. He'd immediately apologize and comfort you once he realizes you're feeling down though! He won't leave your side until you feel better!!! Edd would bring Ringo and cuddle together, as he's listening to you vent. And of course he's respectful, so if this seems too much for you and you just wanna be alone, he will. But you can't stop him from checking up on you if you've been in your room too long. He just wants the best for you and loves you so much :((. You'll be showered with kisses and hugs afterwards <3333.

Matt

Just like Edd, he's also oblivious. But I do think that he'd be the master at comforting!! He'll definitely say something like "You're too beautiful/handsome to cry!" and he will praise you to make you feel better <3. Would also just hold you close to him if you wanna cry more. MATT WOULD ALSO USE HUMOR TO MAKE YOU LAUGH AND FEEL BETTER!!!!!!! I mean he's dumb all the time so anything he does makes you laugh but- He'd do something fun with you so you can get your bad thoughts out of your mind! Like he'd do your makeup or maybe like cook something together (although the kitchen will get destroyed but). HES A TOTAL SWEETHEART AND HE JUST WANTS TO MAKE YOU FEEL BETTER :((((.

Tom

Okay, so you might think Tom is shitty at comforting. But nope, he's actually pretty decent at it (as long as he knows what he's doing ykyk). First, he'd awkwardly ask if you wanna talk about it. If you don't and wanna be alone, he'll let you be until you'll feel better and talk to you afterwards. If you want him to stay, then great! He's a good listener, and even if he can't help. Tom will still be there for you, and listen to your problems. He'll tell you what he usually do to cope with bad thoughts! He'll just pat you on the back. And if he feels extra, he'll even give you a hug! Depending on why you're feeling sad, he'd say "Those are just shitty thoughts trying to get under your skin. Don't make those thoughts take a hold of you, even if it seems hard sometimes." ORRR "Ignore those bad people. They're just seeking for your attention, which is a stupid way of doing that. Ignore them next time and fucking spit on them. If they won't stop, tell me, and I'll deal with it. No one's allowed to hurt you."

Tord

He's kinda bad at comforting, sorry 😭. If you're really close friends with him, he'd actually try. If you're looking for advice from him, he'd say something dumb like "You wanna know what I do when I'm sad? I just bottle it up like a big boy. Maybe you should do that too?" I wish I was playing 😕. BUTTTT he's also a good listener like Tom. He's WAYYYY better at listening to you vent other than giving advices as you can see…. because sometimes he can seem a bit harsh. BUT I SWEAR HES JUST A BROKEN COMMIE AND HES TRYING HIS BEST TO HELP YOU OUT. But something he would do is beat the shit out of the people who made you feel that way!!!!! He'll just hug you as he's drawing circles on your back with his hands, plotting revenge for the bullies :3

[obsessivelyloved]

Yo could we get some headcannons for the poly relationship after the reader confesses to all four of the lads from the last one, maybe some nsfw if you’re feeling generous 🤲

I don't have many nsfw headcanons rn for all of them, sorry! Thank you for the request <3

____________________________________

- Things are kinda the same after the reader confesses. They all still do the same things with them, but now mostly together and with lots of hand holding and kisses.

- Someone, probably Tord or Edd, makes a calendar with designated days. Since they live together and see each other all the time, the calendar is just for spending time with the reader. Everyone gets a specific day to spend time with the reader and then two days to spend time with all of them.

- If someone brings the reader home on their designated day, then that day mushes into an Everyone spending time, but with the original person getting to hold the reader and be close to them.

- Edd, Tom, Matt, and Tord LOVE it when the reader spends the night. If it’s on one of the Everyone days, they’ll bring blankets and pillows to the living room and cuddle up with each other.

- Will ask reader to move in with them once they hit the 6-7 month mark. Someone always makes everyone breakfast and wakes reader up with kisses.

- Reader pretty much always has someone at their side when they leave either their house or their boyfriend’s house.

Nsfw:

- No matter what, reader is always overstimulated. Not even on purpose, just from having everyone take turns pounding them into the mattress.

- Sex with all four of them is almost always sweet. Someone always holds their hand while another pounds into them. Praises are constantly aimed at them.

- Reader is covered in hickeys and bite marks. They're everywhere. Neck, shoulders, thighs. Tord and Tom also have bite marks but Matt and Edd don't care much for biting/being bitten, so they only have hickeys.

- Most of the time, it goes Matt, Tom, Edd, then Tord. Matt is always good with one round, Tom’s fine with two, and then Edd and Tord can go 2-3 rounds depending on the day.

- To help the reader out, Tord and Edd normally end up getting each other off by stroking each other’s cocks while watching Matt or Tom fuck reader. Tord likes to suck Edd off as reader watches and will occasionally finger Matt and jerk him off if he gets hard again after fucking reader.

- They all try to make reader cum at least once.

[peeterparkr]

red; tom's version|one.

chapter one: sad, beautiful tragic. “Long handwritten note deep in your pocket”

pairing: Tom Holland x Reader (tom's not famous here) story summary: you’re reminiscing through your relationship months after the heartbreak and breakup. Wondering if it went wrong from the very start when Tom arrived at New York, and him being a cautionary tale or if the problems came along the way. Perhaps the key to find back your way to him is going back through the nice things before the heartbreak came. Or is it too painful to go all over again?

chapter summary: you haven't seen him since he ditched you, after months of wearing plaid you go out and realize he's back in new york warnings: angsty, I mean it's a breakup, swearing. word count: 7.3k playlist (updated after each chapter, including Red songs+ other for the chapter): Spotify | Apple Music

fic masterlist next chapter

a/n: Hi, I couldn't wait to share it so I said, screw it, I'm posting this. You don't know how excited I am to write this and share it with you. As you know, this is inspired by Red by Taylor Swift and will hurt. So I expect us all to be crumpled up pieces of paper wearing scarves by the end of this. (perennial is still coming, I'm just waiting on a few people who're reading it). SPECIAL THANKS TO @erodasghosts for reading it and hyping me up and helping me figure this all out. I hope you guys all like it as much as I did. The story is set in New York. Please give feedback!

One month after the breakup.

Strong whiskey, on the rocks. That was his drink of choice that night. The night before had been a beer. You knew you could imagine the taste of his lips by only looking at him. You wondered if he’d gone there for a second night for the same reason you had.

When you had seen him across the place the night before, you had tried to decide how to feel. We always think we will react one way or another when we see our official heartbreak walking through. Victorious as he is perfectly dressed, with his hair flowing.

He hadn’t brought her. Which you didn’t know how to feel about.

The day before you had not been alone, Jules, Matty, and Lula were there.

“Shit, the axolotl at 10 o'clock, you’ve got to be shitting me,” Lourdes, Lula, had whispered before sipping her drink, a Long Island Tea. “We are celebrating she’s doing better, can’t fucking believe this,” she hissed at Jules who only lifted her chin slightly to see who she was referring to. “What the fuck is he doing here? Ay, es que, con qué huevos se atreve a venir aquí? Que no mame.” [with what balls did he dare to come here? He shouldn’t fuck with us. ]

You loved hanging out with Lula and listening to her very refined Spanish cursing.

“It’s not him,” Julia said.

You tried looking back to see who they were referring to. “Who is—?”

“Y/N, wait I just noticed the haircut!” Matt pointed out, reaching over, getting your attention back to them and not at whatever they were referring to. “It looks great. It’s like a new you!”

This new you. The one that had been screwed over twice. Men really have the nerve when it comes to breaking hearts. They recklessly go in and let you believe love comes in all shades of colors, passionate red like the roses they send, and tender pinks like your sweet innocence that they end up stealing. But they never tell you it’ll be you all alone in a dark room with shades of grey under a flickering light that barely warms you.

The new you, which was still a bit lost. Your old self was a stranger to you now. You had no idea who this new you was, she was quiet now. Didn’t have a heart because someone had stolen it and broken it and left it behind a dumpster. Still trying to find it. The new you wasn't.. you.

Your friends were glad, however, they finally got you to go out again. After weeks of wearing plaid and watching Fleabag, and even considering watching Greys Anatomy, a low point, you had finally decided to come back to see if there was any sunshine left for you.

It’s important to point out that you had been broken-hearted and almost crazy when the breakup had happened. Very… delusional. You were not proud of the way you’d reacted. Although you wouldn’t have reacted any other way.

The city had been quiet, the red lights seemed to last longer, and the crowds would often swallow you. The city you once loved was now an open book of a relationship that seemed real, should’ve known it was all fiction.

In your dreams they’d be bright, colorful. The village is aglow. Cold days with warm hearts. Like his.

You’d been cold ever since.

“Ah, yeah, the haircut. Got it today. Lula’s idea” The haircut had come as the solution to a problem that would never be solved. As if cutting your hair meant there was something you had the power on. You didn’t.

How stupid was it? You couldn’t control your life.

“It suits her well, doesn’t it?” Lula admitted proudly.

You still had his picture engraved in your heart. You still dreamed he would come back and say it was all a nightmare.

“It’s nice, I’m glad to have you back,” Jules commented. Julia had probably been the most surprised with the news of the breakup, she had almost gone and killed Tom when he had….unimportant. She hadn’t, though, and she had yet to tell you the reason why. Julia had been mysterious since.

“I’m glad to be back,” you confirmed. You’d ordered a beer, and maybe you shouldn’t have. Stella Artois, his one favorite. You pocketed the beer cap. “Though I was not gone.”

Matt watched you, him and Julia had recently started dating. Best friends since kids who just recently confessed their feelings for each other, took them long enough. “How back are you, though?”

“Meaning?” You asked, taking a sip.

Matt shrugged, “I could introduce you to some friends from work, there’s this hot guy—“

“No,” you interrupted him, leaving the bottle down as you had almost choked. “No, no. Not in the dating area yet. Won’t be in a long time. Still healing.”

Lula still had her eyes glued elsewhere. “Healing from a bullet hole, y/n, whatever you’re doing isn’t working, and band aids won’t fix it—Jules it is, I swear to god it’s him.”

“It’s not him,” Julia rolled her eyes.

“Ay, que sí!” [he is]

“Who?” You asked.

Julia took your hands, “you know Lula,” she rolled her eyes. “I love that you ordered a beer.”

“Yeah,” you gulped. “Beer is universal language for men as in: ‘don’t get close to me.’” A lesson someone dear had taught you once.

Matt tilted his head in agreement, “Yeah.”

“Really?” Lula frowned, “should’ve ordered one. Next time I’ll ask for my drink but instead of a glass I’ll ask them to put it in a beer bottle.”

“Wouldn't it be easier to order a beer?” Matt suggested.

“But then I’d break our tradition.”

Matt watched her, “you really are something.”

You chuckled.

“Why is beer seen as not—feminine?” Matt questioned.

Julia shrugged. “It’s beyond me, really. It’s a drink.”

“Like does my drink make me less of a man?” Matt watched his glass, another Long Island Tea. A stupid inside joke you all had.

“No,” you admitted. “But you know how society is. Since it’s sweet, it’s got to be—“

“Oh, no, no, I love you, y/n, but tonight I don’t want you lecturing us on it, no, tonight we are having fun, ok?” Lula reminded you. “We will not talk about femininity or lack of a beer—or whatever your agenda is up to these days, which, hey! Why does y/n get to break the rule?” Lula questioned. “No Long Island Tea?

Julia glared at her, “Because she can do whatever she wants tonight,” she hissed and then turned to you. “But how are you feeling? It’s your first time going out in months, is it as fun?” Julia was the one to try to cheer you up the most.

No, it wasn’t fun.

“I—feel good!” You lied. Although you were not. But you guessed that’s the response they wanted after seeing you laying down on the ground and crying yourself to sleep. Staring at windows and walking down in the rain. They wanted you to feel better.

Your body was covered in scars.Though, they were from adventures.

“Bullshit,” Lula intruded. “You seem sad. Maybe I’ll get some shots,” she announced before going to get some.

“Well,” you chuckled. “My first time going out and you bring me back to the place where it all started?” You answered cynically but then shrugged. “I’m—I…no. I just—It’s weird. I still see him everywhere, and as I’m here it’s like watching a movie of our greatest moments,” you admitted. “Like hey, look over there, it’s Tom and Y/N’s greatest moments,” you stated, Lula got back. “Let’s start memory lane…”and you sighed and continued with the best presenter voice you had. “Here you’ll wonder how the hell did it go so wrong since they were so perfect, what the hell went wrong, when did it turn into some sad stupid love affair. You’ll be asking yourself hey, they seemed in love, over there, they danced! Over there… they sang a song together! See over there? There was a fucking jukebox in which they have memories! Oh they have memories there too! And you’ll ask yourself, he made it seem real, what the hell happened?” You sighed exhaustedly. “What happened? What the fuck happened? How was I so stupid?” You ran your hands through your face.

Your friends only watched you, with pity, sadness. Even Lula had turned her gaze guilty.

You cleared your throat, “I’m sorry. I’m sorry.”

“No,” Lula sighed, “it’s our fault for bringing you here. We’re fucking idiots. Besides he is—Julia I swear to god, he is there.” Lula raised her hand and Julia quickly pulled it down.

Julia bit her lip, “I—hadn’t realized how much Tom there is here.”

“Yeah.”

“He called me—“Matt had started.

“No, no, we can’t talk about him, baby,” Julia reminded him. Matt widened his eyes and nodded.

You blinked, “no, it’s—He called you? Tom?” Why had Tom called Matty? What for?

“Yeah, had a missed call,” Matt explained, ignoring his girlfriend. “I—it was this morning.”

You felt your chest twist. “Yeah, I get a lot of those too.”

Perhaps he wanted to talk to you and thought Matty was dumb enough to give you the phone.

Julia glared at Matt. “We promised not to—“

“No, hey,” you stopped her. “I—sorry, I brought him up.”

“But we shouldn’t talk about him,” Julia insisted. “Tonight is all about having fun,” she stated as she handed everyone their shots.

“No, it’s alright,” you said. “I’m fine talking about it.”

Lula turned her gaze to you. “Shouldn’t you hate him?”

Were you supposed to hate someone who gave you something so beautiful? Just because it’s over doesn’t mean you have to look back and hate it.

“No,” you answered simply.

Matt watched you. “Wait, really?”

You took a deep breath. “Yeah, I’m—I decided I’m thankful for everything. He really… I… I mean I knew from the start he was trouble. But he got me to get rid of Will. So I’m thankful for Tom. He showed me some beautiful things about him, about myself and… I’m thankful. Even the part when he broke my heart.”

It was a lie. Partly. You had been so full of doubts that you only tried wondering why it had gone so wrong. Or course, the lie was there. His lies. But how could any of it be a lie?

Julia smiled gently, “You’re really a grown up.”

“Or very stupid.” Lula commented.

“Thanks, Lula, I appreciate it,” you rolled your eyes. “I… well, I’ve gotta admit I was pretty stupid.”

Lula shrugged, “Hey, I don’t blame you, boy came in with an accent, he had a cute smile, he was hot, I must admit, and he wasn’t one of those Brooklyn fuckboys that take you to the rooftop and offer you a whiteclaw to watch the sunrise together,” Lula gave in.

“Oh, and they take candid pictures, and they say that their phone camera isn’t as good as their polaroid,” Julia laughed, “But hey, you’re lucky they took you to the rooftop, they never take anyone there, they took you there just because you’re…”

“Different,” Julia, Lula and you chanted.

Matt laughed, “You guys are the worst.”

“Anyway,” Lula said. “We should drink these,” she pointed at the shot glasses as she raised her own. “I came here to get drunk. So, to Y/N being thankful Tom was a piece of shit even when the boy had a dreamy accent?”

You closed your eyes, and let out a defeated dry chuckle. “Yes, to that.”

“To the piece of shit, then!” Lula grinned as the shots clinked and were downed. You instantly regretted drinking it.

Lula scowled as she had her eyes glued back at the bar, “It’s him, Julia, it’s him! What is he doing here? Pendejo, I swear to god I’ll go kill him.” She was furious, and you tried once again following her gaze.

The bar was crowded, red lights crossed around the place, with girls walking with tall heels, trying to smile and nod at guys who were talking to them but clearly were not of interest to them. Friends laughing, people flirting. You didn’t know who your friends were watching.

But the bar seemed to be enough of a reminder of him. How he had made you feel like crowds were never there, and how whenever you had been with him everything disappeared just to be with him.

“Who are we killing?” You questioned.

“Is new y/n a murderer?” Asked Matt. Matt and Julia were your oldest friends. The three of you grew up in Staten Island, and now moved to the crowded places.

Lula coughed. “Hope she is.” Lula, on the other hand, you’ve met in college, she was a very defined addition to the friend group. With more personality. A strong one. Lula, Julia and you shared a small apartment.

Julia cleared her throat.

“The fucking scarf,” Lula scowled.

“What scarf?” Matt asked. And you had the same question.

Julia whispered to her boyfriend’s ear who had turned cold. He lifted his head.

“But it’s not.”

“It is him,” Matt confirmed to Lula. “Jules, it is.”

And now your three friends were acting strange. Usually they did but this was strang-er. They all shared looks, Julia struggled with her hands.

They were watching you with pity but you’d gotten used to that. After the breakup they had been extra careful around you, kinder, you guessed.

Fools they were to believe that by not mentioning him you wouldn’t think of him. He was a memory that would haunt you for the rest of the days.

“So, y/n,” Julia was clearly hiding whatever Lula was seeing.

“Wasn’t he in London? What in this fucking world is he doing here?” Lula continued.

“Shut up!” Julia ordered.

“London?” You asked and you lifted your head, and any noise that was bustling before had stopped.

Tom.

Tom was there.

Thomas.

Tom who had broken your heart. In every possible way that he could’ve. Like he had planned it. Like he was aware.

He was there, on a stool with a beer in his hand and wearing a red scarf. The red scarf. As if he was mocking you.

Tom.

Did he pride on hurting you?

He had always said you were invincible. That you were unrivaled in matters of the heart. Was he proud he had beaten the unbeaten?

You’d always thought he would.

When we love deeply, getting hurt comes as a given. But when we love deeply, we are never expecting it to come. And when it does come the skies cannot turn grayer. Funny thing, you were a fan of the rain but when the rain doesn’t cease, the hope doesn’t perdure.

But he was back in your life. Or at least he had been in the same room as you after months.

What was he doing back in New York with your scarf?

You turned back to your own table, breathing in quickly, bringing your hand to your chest in an attempt to calm yourself down.

You saw your friends speaking but you couldn’t make a word of what they’re saying. Your heart was rushing. Thomas was there. Tom. Your Tom. And there was a part of you that had completely forgotten over the heartbreak and wanted to run to him.

Kiss him, try to fix it. Try to bring back the beautiful thing you both had. Because it was. And it hurt looking back.

You were having trouble breathing now, the heartbreak had come.

That’s the worst thing about heartbreak. You never saw it coming, though you should’ve. Though it was beautiful you’d known from the start you’d end up hurt. But when a lie is crafted so beautifully, how could you?

“It’s him.” The words had come in whispers.

You barely remembered what had happened next. You had only stood up, decisive to leave, you’d seen him try to walk his way to you. You’d heard him call your name, but you hadn’t turned back, you had seen Matty stop him from running to you.

It was blurry. You didn’t know how you got home. Desperately trying to understand why he was there and how the night had turned too badly.

Lula and Matt had come back later to find Julia trying to comfort you, hugging a pillow that you were sure he had slept on. Breathless.

But it was in the past now, you were there again. Same bar, both in stools far away.

You were almost sure he’d gone to that bar in hopes of finding you again.

Just like you’d gone again.

His eyes the night before were guilty. You only took a deep breath, you remembered trying to avoid his glance at any chance as you had walked out.

Why were you there again?

That feeling in your chest growing, like there was something heavy expanding. Yet your stomach falling smaller. The pain was but a shield, as if it was creating a special protection around your heart, and though it hurt it was enough for it to make your heart strong to leave the place.

You didn’t want to see Tom. You hadn’t talked to him since. Even when he’d tried to call. Even when you’d tried calling.

Not when you had replayed the breakup over and over and over again since he was gone.

Everyone deals with breakups in different ways. Yours, specifically, was avoiding it. Everything and everyone. Especially Tom.

It was hard when he was everywhere. In that tattoo he’d convinced you to get, in that ring he’d left, in that cereal box that you still hadn’t finished. Whenever you listened to a song he’d recommended. Whenever you’d open Netflix and that series you had started watching together was still recommended to you even when you’d deleted it.

Everywhere.

You couldn’t use your favorite colors because you could hear it, in the back of your head “I love how it looks on you.” “You should wear more blue, it suits you.”

Even your stupid laugh remind you of him. “Your laugh is the most wonderful thing I’ve heard, even if it’s so ugly.”

You missed the person you were when he was with you. How everything was happy. Who was that y/n? Who didn’t mind if she was slightly late to a place because he’d come with you? Who didn’t feel alone at parties when she knew nobody because you knew him?

A y/n that existed only for a short period of time when he’d been around and that he’d shattered like glass when he had the chance.

You missed that y/n.

The y/n that would sometimes lose her breath and catch it back when he walked into the room. A y/n that sang along to her favorite songs all day. The one that would give her heart in a rush to him. The one that watched movies no matter if they were good or not.

Life had colors back then.

Now you were full of regrets and of doubts. Wondering what you had done wrong? Where did it lead you?

You looked up at him then. He was staring down at his glass.

There was a slight trace of him still there, the Tom you once loved. The one with the silly smile and the gentle chuckle, the one with the jokes about everything.

You wondered how much of that y/n he saw too.

You were the same two people, in essence. But how different you were now.

The Tom you knew before finding out it was a lie.

There was still a hint. You knew. But there was so much of him in you that it was hard to see if you still were there. Or the Tom you thought you knew. Not the one with the lie. Or maybe this was the truest Tom he could ever be.

He had to move on, rather quickly, you recalled. If he ever did.

There was a stupid reminder of you in his hand, that red scarf from the very first day.

You still remembered how it all started, a stupid red scarf. He kept it, then, and he wore it.

You had ordered a beer, too. You pocketed the cap again.

But there was an image in your mind, maybe he had gone back and probably had his arm around her and he laughed at a joke she made. Maybe she was funnier than you. Definitely prettier, with her hair falling down all the way to her waist, her clothing accentuating everything you didn’t have.

You recalled having to leave the room when you found out. You had been a mess.

Leaning against a wall as you caught your breath before the tears came down, as if he had pierced right through it. A pain chest that had expanded all the way on your body, not sure how you were able to keep walking back to your place. Falling down to your knees when you did.

Pain. Words failed to describe such a deep sentiment.

But it was gone now. Not entirely but at least you could hold your breath fine when he was just across the room.

What went wrong?

You could ask him. He was right there.

Maybe even tell him how you had lost sight. He hadn’t walked up to you. He was nervous, but he seemed calm enough to see you were there. You were still unsure why you had gone there.

Maybe all the good things were enough to bring you there, maybe the fact that you still didn’t believe it was a lie brought you there. Maybe the fact that one of those pictures from that photobooth was still in a locket. So stupid.

He fiddled with the glass.

You waited and waited but he didn’t approach you. He took out a paper out of his pocket as he stared at it.

You wouldn’t approach him. No matter how happy he had made you once, you wouldn’t walk to him. No matter how beautiful it was. No matter if you were lonely and that when you dared to sleep he’d be haunting your dreams.

It was a tragedy now. What you both were, and not even worth enough to try and save it. You knew you were haunting him too. Otherwise he wouldn’t be here.

He was shakin, as he stared at you, nervous. He downed his drink, you guessed it was for some liquid courage and stood up, with the note in one hand and your red scarf in the other.

Your own courage for coming here was gone, as you saw his intentions, the urge to run you had the night before was becoming you. But he couldn’t walk. He had to sit down again, rubbing his face.

The courage that had come when choosing what Lula called the ‘revenge black dress’ was nowhere in sight. You were cold and regretting putting it on.

“I can’t do this,” you said to yourself and quickly let out some dollars to pay for your drink before picking up your stuff to leave.

You saw he panicked when he saw you leaving, he quickly called the bartender to pay for his drink.

You closed your coat as you were shaking yourself, punishing yourself for going there. Why had you gone there? The man had broken your heart? Were you really there to see him?

Was your heart foolish enough to ignore the warnings in your mind once again?

You walked your way to get to the subway station, how irrelevant you were through the crowds. You hadn’t felt this way for a while, caring for the crowds. But you had to get through them. There was a part of you that wished Tom was following you after. But the crowds didn’t let you see if he was.

Besides, you shouldn’t want that.

You finally managed to get to the station, you clung to your purse as you stared at the tracks, waiting for the next train to come. Peaceful it seemed, the station. As peaceful as New York could be. You guessed if you cried nobody would care.

“y/n!” You heard your name in the distance and you couldn’t handle it.

You took a deep breath and shook your head, angrily. Why had you gone? You could’ve easily kept ignoring his calls. You could’ve stayed in your apartment, crying as you watched SNL videos on youtube, or rewatching a cartoon for the hundredth time, letting your own sadness and self pity swallow you.

But you had gone to him. This was your fault. You should’ve taken a cab, instead, he would know you’d get at this station and he for sure would know what train you’d take.

“y/n, y/n!” He kept calling as he finally arrived next to you. “Sorry I would’ve gotten here faster but the damn MetroCard-”

“I’m not doing this, Tom,” you stated before he could go on rambling like the idiot he was. You couldn’t do it. “Not here, not anywhere. I don’t know what you’re doing here.”

“I…” His face was kind, and he seemed to be nervous. You could tell he hadn’t been sleeping, probably the jet lag.

You took a moment to look at him, he didn’t look as victorious as you had thought he was. His hair was messy, and his cheeks flushed, the buttons on his shirt were not buttoned right.

Seeing him again, with that signature look he had made you want to go down to your knees.

“Aren’t you supposed to be back in London?” You snapped. “With that pretty girl-”

“No, no, I’m-I’m sorry, I’m really sorry,” Tom stuttered. “I was an idiot.”

You stared into his eyes, you were not ready for this. You were not ready to look into his stupid eyes. You looked away. “That’s all you have to say?” You tried walking away from him..

He shook his head. “No, no, no, no, I… No, I actually… I had this… I wrote down my apology,” Tom confessed. He showed you a sad, handwritten paper, now slightly teared up with the ink running. “I… I had….”

You looked down at it, his messy handwriting, crinkled with words scratched down. “You wrote it down?”

You didn’t know why you felt your heart warm. This kind of stuff was why you couldn’t understand what had happened. Someone like him, who writes his apologies down. Someone who stutters when he’s speaking.

“Yeah, I… but I spilled my drink on it after seeing you fled,” He explained, swallowing hard. “I… I… I had written it down so I wouldn’t forget it but now I realize how stupid that is… I’m… I’m really sorry, y/n.” .

You could hear the train coming. You were seeing him again. It hit you right there. And this was not the reaction you thought. You had said you would be delusional, crying and fighting and questioning him why the fuck he had done that.

Yet you weren’t. You were only watching him, eyes full of tears wanting to slide down but unable to. But there was that pain still in your chest.

How could he ever dare to hurt you that way? “I don’t want to talk to you,” you said. And meant it. “Please leave me alone.” You said before walking into the train.

“Y/N, please, no, please, please, listen to me,” He followed you in, the scarf still in his hand.

You tried sitting as far away as you could. Arms and legs crossed as you tried breathing in.

He sat beside you and you changed seats. He sighed but followed you again. “Please, I need to talk to you. I never meant to hurt you.”

“Well you did,” you snapped. “You did, and now you come here a month later with a handwritten note apology thinking I will be fine with it?”

He pinched the bridge of his nose. “I had to solve-Please, would you listen?” Tom asked, knowing damn well he had to ask, and not just straight up blurt it out.

“Why would I, Tom?” You turned to him, with a tear traveling down your cheek. You were incredulous. “You’re kidding me, right? I… You… You think that just because you show up with that stupid face of yours and my scarf I’ll want to listen to you? You’re an idiot.”

He sighed and reached to give you the scarf. You ignored it.You were furious now.

The other people on the train were certainly getting a show. A guy with a backpack was trying to pretend he wasn’t listening but his reactions were giving it away. Another woman pretended to keep reading her book but she hadn’t turned any pages.

Tom took the scarf back staring at it. “I need to explain everything to you.”

“What if I don’t want an explanation?” You snapped. Though you did. You had been waiting for one, you wanted one. You would beg for it. But your pride was taking the wheel of the conversation. “Don’t you think it’s fucking late for it?”

“Is it?” Tom turned back to you.

“Yes!” You couldn’t believe him. But this seemed a bit too familiar of a conversation. “And beside no explanation would make me forgive you!” You stated, whispering, not wanting any of the attention you were receiving.

“I’m not… I… If you just listen to me,” Tom said.

You glared, “I don’t want anything to do with you.”

“Then why did you come to the bar?” He asked.

He fucking asked.

Your eyes widened. He had gone there. He knew. He fucking knew you’d gone back because you wanted an explanation. Or so he thought. No, you’d gone back because… Yes, because you wanted an explanation. Because everything he’d done had been beautiful. Until the heartbreak. He had crafted and vexed his way into your cold stupid heart and then he had gone and pierced right through it, crushed it.

You wanted to ask why. Why did he do it so vehemently?

You didn’t answer, instead you moved one seat away. He kept his eyes on you.

“You wouldn’t have gone if you didn’t want an explanation,” he said. “Or to see me, at least. I know I did, I needed to see you.”

You saw the guy with the backpack purse his lips, knowing that Tom had got you. There was little context for them. The girl with the book directed a glance to you, trying to read your emotions.

If they knew, they’d be on your side and yelling at him as well.

He rested his elbows on his knees and rubbed his face.

“I didn’t, it was a coincidence,” you answered coldly.

“No, it bloody wasn’t,” Tom scoffed and then sat up. “No, I’m… No, but you know, you went to the bar for a reason.”

“And I left for a million more,” you frowned.

Tom pursed his lips and took out the paper again, trying to make out whatever he’d written before. “I’m really sorry.” His eyes traced through the note.

“Are you genuinely trying to read it? Don’t you know what you’re supposed to apologize for?”

Tom looked up, “So you do want me to apologize?”

The guy with the backpack squeezed his eyes shut, knowing Tom had fucked up.

“You’re kidding, right? Yes, you have to apologize, what you did is really, really shitty!” You pointed out.

“But you won’t forgive me, then?” Tom watched you.

“I don’t know,” you said and he looked up, a beaming gaze. “No, I won’t.”

He wrinkled his eyes, “I… I know I’m supposed to apologize, not to expect you to forgive. I'm just…”

He gulped, and then sat back, staring at the dirty walls and lights. He had dressed up. Badly, but he had tried looking good, you could tell. You could smell his lotion, too.

He was fiddling with the paper, crumpling up and then it fell to the floor. You looked at it and somehow related to it, not sure how.

You took a deep breath so you wouldn’t kill him and turned to him. “I have questions for you, if you answer them I might consider listening to you.”

Tom’s eyes brightened up. “Yes, yes, anything.”

You eyed him up and down as he watched you with begging eyes. You avoided his gaze. Tom followed your gaze as you tried to figure out what was the first thing you could ask him. Why had he hurt you?

Why did he not stop and think before making you fall in love with him?

Why did he not stop and tell you the truth?

“Where are you staying?” You asked,

Tom blinked. “Is that… is that the question?”

“No, but I know you don’t know how to fucking get anywhere,” you said.

Tom gulped, “I… uh, again with Harrison,” he explained.

You sighed. You remembered Harrison alright. And though there was a petty part inside you, you would help him out. Knowing he’d always get lost in the city. Though you could let him get lost, so you’d have to go after him and spend a bit more time. With an excuse, because you didn’t seem to have any excuse to be with him.

It hurt. What hurt the most was trying not to look back at the incredible moments you had because none of them were true.

You sighed. “Okay, when we get down you’ll take the F train—“

Tom stopped you, taking your hand. “No, wait, I don’t care if I get lost, okay, I… I just.”

You snatched your hand away from his cold hands he had. You darkened your gaze at him.

“Please, Y/n, I just need a chance. If you don’t want to listen… maybe I’ll just…” He handed you the note.

You crossed your arms, and tapped your foot, trying to decide whether or not to give it to him. “Fine,” you took the note.

You've gotten to your stop. So you stood up.

The girl with the book and the guy with the backpack watched you both as you walked out, pitying they couldn’t follow the drama.

Tom followed after you, he licked his lips. “You… you had questions, right?”

“Yeah.” You nodded, taking yet another heavy breath. You turned on your feet to look at him “One, did you lie to me?”

Tom was taken back by this, his eyes, consternated, only watched you. He gulped. “What?”

“Did you lie to me?

“I… well.”

You were getting desperate. “Did you ?”

“I didn’t lie about how I felt,” he said. You knew he wasn’t lying about it. He couldn’t. He couldn’t have ever lied about how he felt because you knew he had felt it too, a bit, at least,

You rolled your eyes, “Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, whatever.”

“I mean it, I…” Tom gulped. “I really liked you.”

“Yeah, I know, you liked me yadda, yadda,” you started. Liked not loved. “Cut the bullshit for once, did you or did you not lie to me?”

Tom took a deep breath. “Yes. But I had feelings for you.”

You bit your inner cheeks. “Uh-huh, yes, okay, good, yes, you acknowledge it. So, we have two statements here, Tom. You say you had feelings yet you lied to me,” you squinted. “Sounds-”

Tom gulped and avoided your gaze. “I know yes,” he looked down. “But, if you give me-”

“Ah, buh-buh, nope, I’m just gathering my thoughts here,” you coughed. “I need you to look me in the eyes and tell me what you felt.”

Tom shook his head in confusion. “I—I’m”

“Go on,” you motioned your hand.

“Y/N,” he said. And the way he dared to say your name was like having a knife right through you. “I had—I have feelings for you,” he said looking right into your eyes.

He didn’t say what feelings.

You were not sure where you wanted to go with this. “Fine, my next question…” you really didn’t know where this was going. “So, alright, you…” You couldn’t even phrase it. “You… made me fall in love with you knowing….Well, we both know what you did. What you hid from me. You’re a liar who made me—“

Tom took a deep breath. “Yes, but I didn’t… plan that.”

Your eyes widened. “Oh, so it’s my fault?” You stepped back. “Sorry for developing feelings for you. Sorry for ruining your life—“

Tom closed his eyes, “No, no, look, I… wasn’t. I didn’t come here expecting to meet you, I didn’t want… It just happened, okay, I never thought—You're making it sound like it’s some big master plan. I—I never planned—I never would’ve ever planned on hurting you.”

You watched him, incredulous. “Thomas you do realize what you did to me?”

“I do.”

“No, you don’t! You’re trying to make me seem like I’m crazy for not even wanting to talk to you!” You called him out.

“I’m not, I’m just saying that if you’re here—you must miss it too, you know it was too real, and you want it back, possibly—M-maybe not, but if you came to the bar tonight it was in hopes of finding me again because you knew I’d be there, and you want to feel how you felt before, and i just… you know I miss it and that you knew I didn’t lie—“

You glared at him. “You did lie!”

“Okay—yes, yes I did—But not entirely, I just happened to omit one truth—“

“One very important truth,” you snarked.

“Fine but—please listen,” he tried to convince you. “and I’m sorry, okay? I—I didn’t want to hurt you. But I never planned this. It just happened. I didn’t come here expecting to fall in love with anyone, I didn’t come here trying to date, and I never expected it to be someone as complex—“

“Complex?”

“Yes, I never came to New York trying to find the most mental relationship I’ve ever had—“

“Mental?” You snapped.

“Yes! I love you but you’re fucking crazy! And I am too! I’m fucking crazy and mental but I—I—I loved being crazy and mental with you! We are fucking mental! Driving to nowhere? Breaking into places? Getting a jukebox on the subway? That’s mental! But—but I love that about you, alright? Don’t you get it? I could’ve stayed in London, I could've been the asshole who just ditched you and lied to you—“

You scoffed. “Well that’s comforting!”

“But I��m—I’m here, ain’t I? And I know I fucked up, I know, I accept that, I’m the asshole here, and I know you’ll never—I hid it from you because I didn’t know what was going on, I didn’t even get it myself. I’m here to give you my version of it. I didn’t realize I was falling in love with you…I am…,I am in love with you, and I never planned that, I wasn’t supposed to fall in love with someone else, it just happened. I may have thought it was just—Some fling, initially.”

You laughed cynically. “A fling.”

He gulped. “And the moment I realized what was really going on—”

“You left, that’s what you fucking did, when you realized it was way too real for you, you destroyed the one real thing you’ve ever known,” you barked, he stepped back. “I fell in love with you, I—I—and then you ditched me, and I thought that was the worst thing you could ever do to me but then I realized that it wasn’t real! I—you were never mine, Tom! I simply was—a break you needed or—a fling.”

“It wasn’t that—“

You watched him. Looking so innocent, kind eyes and tender lips. You would’ve believed him had he come before.

“You used me!” You snapped, the words that had wanted to come for a while just blurted out. “I just can’t believe you,” you said. “You don’t feel sorry.” You shook your head, your voice was cracking. “You're not sorry because you don’t understand. You don’t know what I went through, and if you had come earlier, if you hadn’t left me, I probably would have believed you. But—No! No!” You stepped back. “No!”

“I did call! You never picked up the phone! I tried—“Tom started.

“Was I really expected to pick it up? Let’s get back to it. Shall we? The facts. Did you or did you not date me? And made me fall in love with you?”

Tom sighed. “I—yes.”

“Did you lie?”

“…yes.”

You nodded. “Was I the other one?”

Tom squinted his eyes. “No… yes, no.”

You took a deep breath. “Did you leave me without an explanation?”

Tom looked down. “I did.”

“Did you ditch me?”

Tom looked everywhere and nowhere. “Yes,” he answered, defeated.

“Now, do you think I can ever forgive you?”

Tom didn’t answer.

You reached for your purse, for the locket that dug deep inside. “I don’t know you,” you stated giving him the locket, the stupid locket you’d bought as a joke when making fun of other couples and now laughed in your face. “Whatever happened means nothing. Because that’s the thing Tom. Everything we lived was a lie, those two people in the locket are not us, because you weren’t who you said you were, no matter how much I loved it, it’s not true and though it was too many emotions all at once I’m—It’s not real, not for you. I spent this whole time thinking I wanted you to apologize but I don’t want it. That charming guy wasn’t truly you because you omitted one very important thing. You—What were you thinking? Were you planning to never say it? Or did you plan it like that? Just ditching me, hoping I wouldn’t find out—“

Tom took a deep breath. “No—No, I didn’t. I just—-I didn’t know what to do. I’m so sorry, I should’ve told you and I should’ve fixed it before—-“

“No, no you didn’t because it wasn’t enough for you.”

Tom gulped, “It was, it was—-the best thing I’ve ever had.”

“And you ruined it.”

“I’m sorry.”

“How little words mean when you’re a little too late, huh?” And that was the cue you needed to walk away. He silently watched you as you tried not to cry.

“I’m really sorry.” He said.

Was he?

“What if I try to prove it to you?” He asked as you were steps away from him.

You didn’t stop.

“If we go over this, you’ll see I never lied about it.” He continued.

“I already went over it, I remember everything, Tom, and maybe that’s why I don't want to talk to you.”

Tom walked behind, slowly. “I just happened to be very unlucky when it came to my own circumstances,” he reached over. “And I wish the timing had been better. But you’re right, it’s the one real thing I’ve ever had and I lost it because I hid something in fear of losing you. I lied because it was too good to be true. And I understand if you don’t want anything to do with me but I think you deserve to know why. But you went to the bar for a reason, and you had the locket for another.”

You stopped this time. Looking down at the floor and then at his hand, holding your stupid scarf. You shook your head, you really didn’t want to go through it all over again.

“I know you won’t forgive me,” he stated. “But I can’t let you go. You’re everywhere. And I miss the person I was when you were around, and I won’t stop fighting because you’re everywhere. Dreams, nightmares.”

Funny. You were his demons too.

“Am I haunting your nightmares?” You asked. Tom only watched you.

He took a deep breath. “I don’t expect you to forgive me, I just need—I really need you to listen to my version.”

“Fine then, let’s go down this sad, beautiful tragic love affair.”

-

next chapter

want to be tagged?(please say it's for red)

tag list and some friends: @noorrussell @nocturnalms @xxconfettiitsaparade @annathesillyfriend @butterflies-glitter @tomkindholland @the-salty-asian @words-to-accomplish-something @harryhollandsgirlfriend @bibliophilewednesday @tomhollandsbitch8 @boiolay @wizkiddx @spideyssunshine @parkertommy @erodasghosts @onewithnomightypowers @sunflowersandaydreams @tomshufflepuff @uglypastels @lilacsandwhiskey @badhollandfluff @saintlavrents @enilemes @white-wolf1940 @mannien @softholand @youcompletemesk @ughdangs@obiwanownsmyass @sleepingdancer @lonely-sag @n-pg-pw @readheadwriter @parkersroses @petesrparker

[clanwarrior-tumbly]

an eddsworld request pls? tom and tord fighting over the same S/O? sorry if this is vague.

"You know [y/n]'s obsessed with Sunshine and Lollipops, right? They threatened to play it in your sleep-"

"Wow, can't think of a more believable lie than that? Hah. I doubt they'd want to be stuck with someone who lies 24/7 anyway."

"You're calling me a liar?! Last time I checked, I didn't destroy our home and betray my friends!!"

"Well at least I don't look like the result of a bowling ball's and pineapple's one-night stand!"

"WHAT did you say about my parents?!!!"

"You heard me, Jehovah!!!"

"Who's idea was it to invite Tord back here?" Edd sighed as he looked to you and Matt, clearly annoyed at the antics of his roommates.

Ever since Tord returned home, fights between him and Tom have been nonstop. Almost every little inconvenience led to something that nearly resulted in the destruction of the room--or entire house, even.

But as of late, the source of the fighting was you.

No, you didn't purposefully instigate it. You could literally just sigh and the two would argue over who made you upset...even if neither of them did.

Honestly, you didn't know why they were acting this way, especially around you and nobody else. They seemingly only cared about their guitars and robots, so you were clueless as to how you suddenly became a big deal in their lives.

It was like..they were competing for your attention.

While some of the fights have been entertaining, this one in particular was starting to get on your nerves. All you did was sit down on the inflatable lounge chair Tord created, and Tom got annoyed for some reason, thus leading to them arguing in front of the TV.

Matt checked his reflection to distract himself, and Edd awkwardly scratched Ringo's ears, the cat mirroring her owner's attitude.

It was clear that the situation was only gonna escalate from here, so you finally decided to intervene and find out what the hell is going on. "Okay, time out for everyone!" You got up, clapping your hands together.

The noise shut Tom and Tord up quickly as they glanced at you.

"Who wants to take a walk with me?"

"I do!!"

"Me!!"

Both men raised their hands at the exact same time, before glaring at each other. From the way Tom's eyes whitened, you could tell he was three seconds away from strangling Tord.

Fortunately, you had a Plan B.

"If you don't stop, I'll throw out all the beer and cigars."

This time they remained completely silent, staring at you with mortified expressions. Now that they'll finally listen to you, you smiled and made them follow you outside.

Edd and Matt were astonished. You managed to calm them down? Without anything being destroyed?? You were definitely some miracle worker.

As soon as you, Tom, and Tord were on the front lawn, you shut the door and huffed at the pair. They had their hands stuffed into their pockets, looking down at their shoes in shame. Like little kids who got in trouble with their parent.

"Okay, what's going on with you two?" You questioned. "You've been fighting over me like..like you got a crush or something."

"....."

"......."

"Now neither of you wanna talk? Man..you're both confusing. But that's alright, I'll make us stay out here all night until-"

"Fine." Tord was the first to crack, taking out a cigar to light it. "I only came back because..I liked you. But funny how this one-" He elbowed Tom's side. "-decides to fall in love with you now, even though he's been your roommate for way longer. That's just classic, stupid Tom for you."

The man in blue scowled at the insult, but looked up at you with a small sigh, confirming that Tord wasn't lying. "Yeah, well maybe I am stupid to think I had a shot. Forget I ever said anything." He was about to leave and go back inside the house, only for you to grab his hood.

"Oh no you don't. You're not running off like you did when Tord took your room. Just talk to me or I'll dump the last bottle of smirnoff down the drain."

Once again, your threat worked as Tom stayed put. You let go of his hood, allowing him to face you once more. "I mean..you know how we feel about you now, but...even if you like us back, it's not like you can have both of us-"

"Why not?"

He blinked at your question. Even Tord was caught by surprise as he choked on smoke for a second. They didn't seem to understand what you were implying, so you elaborated that you actually liked both of them equally, and it was possible to date both of them.

Neither were aware of that before, but looked disgruntled over the idea of sharing you--considering their rivalry. Though on the bright side, it would save one of them from heartbreak and envy..

"You two can fight about whatever the heck you want, but not me." You wrapped both arms around their shoulders, grinning as the blushes on their faces worsened. "See? Problem solved."

"W-Would..that be alright with you?" Tom still felt a little uncertain. "I mean Tord and I still have some...things to work on.."

"And I'll help you both work on those issues as they come."

The other male nodded in understanding, smirking as he wrapped his arm around you. "Oh, [y/n]. Always the peacekeeper in our little group, eh? Just like old times."

"Yep." You hugged the two close, noting Tom's tiny smile. "Definitely like old times."

[actuallyunreal]

Sorry if this has been asked before, but do u have any songs u associate with ur versions of the ew guys?

ahoy there! what a fun question!! :D :D :D

so i actually have a playlist for my au at least with a couple songs for each character. :3 i have to add some for the neighbors, but hey :3 (uhhh it dawned on me that you just asked for them in general and not specifically my au but honestly? i dont make too much of a distinction - but still, my bad!)

fun tip: everyones got at least one song from death of a bachelor by p!atd but i didnt put them all on the playlist because then it would be like…. 90% p!atd and thats just silly

anyway heres my ~best of~ picks or whatever!

OH ALSO if youre not into 💔😈garbage weepy edgy boys😈💔 i would not recommend reading further <3 i love silly boys but my song picks are always dramatic because i have no self control. 😊

edd: my ordinary life - the living tombstone; They tell me that I'm special, I smile and shake my head I'll give them stories to tell friends about the things I said They tell me I'm so humble, I say, "I'm turning red" They let me lie to them and don't feel like they've been misled They give so much to me, I'm losing touch, get me? Served on a silver platter, ask for seconds, they just let me wrecking ball - mother mother; It takes a dedicated hand To put it through the wall You gotta wanna break the heart Of all those pretty porcelain dolls You gotta want to be the drummer in the band You gotta want to be a battering ram You gotta see the artistry In tearing the place apart with me baby dont threaten me with a good time - p!atd Champagne, cocaine, gasoline And most things in between I roam the city in a shopping cart A pack of camels and a smoke alarm This night is heating up Raise hell and turn it up Saying "If you go out you might pass out in a drain pipe" Oh, yeah, don't threaten me with a good time

tom: bad decisions - redhook; Okay, now please don't think I'm tryna glamorise all of the shit that I despise about myself 'Cause my mental health is tenuous at best from all the pressure and the stress of other people's expectations I'm crushed by the weight, so I self-medicate to escape Then I just make more mistakes, can't break this stupid cycle of self-hate dread in my heart - mother mother; Oh I wonder what it's like to be the type who doesn't burn Ya the kind who fights the good fight Not the kind you'll find fisti-fuckin-cuffin' in the dirt death of a bachelor - p!atd Do I look lonely? I see the shadows on my face People have told me I don't look the same Maybe I lost weight, I'm playing hooky with the best of the best Pull my heart out my chest, so that you can see it too

tord: heroes - emmy curie; So you wanna be the hero, kid, be adored by everyone 'Cause no one can forget you when you're the reason they have won You want the fame, the attention, but more than anything You're scared of fading to the background like you didn't mean a thing anime intro - public theatre; I couldn't help but notice your under eyes You were looking pretty skinny last night Are you even fighting I couldn't help but notice your little lies You keep saying that you'll be just fine Are you even trying Anymore now house of memories - p!atd Baby, we built this house on memories Take my picture now, shake it 'til you see it And when your fantasies become your legacy Promise me a place in your house of memories

matt: emperor's new clothes - p!atd Welcome to the end of eras Ice has melted back to life Done my time and served my sentence Dress me up and watch me die If it feels good, tastes good It must be mine Dynasty decapitated You just might see a ghost tonight Double, double, double down And if you don't know now you know inferno - rain paris; Terribly terrible, she's a villain One as sweet as caramel, she's my saint Think I'm getting butterflies, but it's really Something telling me to run away

[belovedmoss]

Eddsworld One Shots! Getting scared of a nightmare!

I[Hi...i honestly don't care if people don't read these or not it's just I want people to actually see these wait wtf is going on here]

Gets intrusive thoughts of love bitting the reader*

N/n= nickname

F/c= favourite colour

F/f= favourite food

h/c= hair colour

H/l= hair length

~*~*~*~hello.....do your best my love~*~*~*~*~

Matt:

You wake up in the midst of a dream, a nightmare to be exact. You get out of your room and walk up the attic stairs over to Matt's room. You think that either edd, Tom, or tord isn't going to help you with this. So as you creep up the stairs, you hear Matt talking to himself.

"Oh I look incredibly beutiful! "

'It's 2 in the morning and this ginger hasn't gone to sleep yet?' You think.

"....Matt....?" You say softly, not scaring the ginger. Matt quickly looks up from his mirro and asks, "oh hi n/n! What's up?" The ginger says. You blush just a tiny bit before smacking your palm to your forehead. "Ack! Never mind this is cringy and dumb and childish." You say before reaching the steps.

"Did the dream happen again?" He asks, concerned as he ever has been.

You look at the floor and nod, slowly.

"Wanna stay up and build forts?"

~*~*~*~*hello....do your best my love~*~*~*~*~*~

Edd:

As you are watching a movie with the guys (yes including piss-baby tord) you slowly start to drift off to a slumber. But what you didn't know was that this was no ordinary dream, it was a night mare.

Now edd starts to see that you are sweating so he helps you and wakes you up from your bad dream. Lucky no one noticed you undeniably sweating. You wake up startled and see the brown haired boy hold your shoulder. He leans in and whispers: "you okay?" You notice the stain on his shoulder of his hoodie.

"Well yes..and no....."

Edd gets up and announces that he's going to make some tea for him and you. You get up and follow him.

As Edd prepares the tea he sees you starting to cry. He stops what he was doing and walks over to you. "Y/n are you okay?" He holds your shoulder.

"No! I-it was a horrible dream, y-you and Tom got into a f-fight, a-and he hurt you, and you didn't w-wake up!" You managed to get out in short trouble breaths.

"Y/n just breath...okay it's alright" Edd says as he rubs your back.

You hug edd and he hugs you back.

"It's okay my love.....Wanna ditch the tea and drink some cola instead?"

~*~*~*~*~hello....do your best my love~*~*~*~*~*

Tom:

you were pulling an all nighter with Tom. He played his bass to keep you both awake. But you suddenly fell asleep.

"...tom....no....please....." You mumble.

"ugh! Y/n c'mon we were gonna pu-" Tom looks at your shuddering body.

He sets down his bass and studies you.

'i don't think they're okay...maybe I should wake them up.....' Tom thinks as he reaches towards your body. But you jump awake and in tears.

"Tom!" You yell-whisper. Tom immediately pulls you into a hug.

You start crying. "Y/n....what happened? Is everything okay....shhh...I'm here...." He says as he strokes your h/c h/l hair. (Or if you're rocking the eleven look then get it bestie owo) you sniffle as you hug Tom tightly.

You think as he comforts you

'his hoodie is super soft'

'Why does he have black eyes....Or holes'

'He feels warm....kinda comforting'

'is he doing this, actually comforting me, or just so that he can shut me up?'

'I love his voice.....'

'How does he have Steve kept that well'

'Also Susan....I need my own Susan....'

"Y/ n....." Tom says pulling out of the hug. You sniffle again and look up at him with sore eyes. "Yeah tommy?"

"Want me to play you a lullaby?"

~*~*~**~*~* hello....do your best my love~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Tord:

(Tord isn't really a person to comfort you so sorry if Tord is your comfort character)

(Heya I have been practicing norsk so yeah)

You and the norsk man are shooting guns at a target.

At 3 in the morning

When you haven't been able to sleep for two days

In the middle of nowhere

You start to become drowsy and fall down. Lucky the gun was on safety and didn't shoot. Tord puts down his gun quickly and runs over to you.

"Å min dysber" (oh my darling)

Fast forward a few minutes because the author is too lazy to do a whole ass scene.

Tord is driving you both home. He laid the passenger seat down to where it was somewhat flat so you could sleep. As you did.

But you'd think that Tord was not easily startled, but he was at this moment. You gasp loudly and he almost swerved off the road.

" Jesus Christ y/ n!" Except you're in tears. And Tord starts yelling at you. So you just turn the other way.

(A N: forgor they stopped the car)

Tord realized that he was yelling and quickly stopped.

"Y/n I'm sorry"

"Give me your hand Tord" you say.

You place his hand on your cheek and then you drive home the end ppppppppffffft

(Sorry I am sleep deprived rn it's 2 in the morning 😏🔫🎆

[wizkiddx]

I lovelovelovelove ur writing. Was thinking if u could do one where readers relationship w tom exposed bcos someone recognises her but she isnt famous? And its all backwards and caught out sort of thing

thanks for being so kind! also I feel like me narrator-y voice has gone WAY too far, what do u guys think? I won't be offended promise I just think it sounds so fucking annoying rn

Tom Holland x reader

summary: you run into possibly the most infuriating family members the one time u and ur boy are showing PDA

warnings = none I think :)

///////////////////////

It was a late late evening, on the last train of the night towards manchester, the British countryside plunged into darkness that appeared as a blank, black canvas out the rounded-rectangular windows. 

And although the serene surroundings were calming, the regular and rhythmic movement of the carriage on the tracks - you were more on edge. Your relationship with Tom had yet to be revealed to the world - though you’d travelled as part of his extended entourage before under the guise of a ‘family friend’. So now it just being you, Tom, Harry, Andrew and Rachel - you felt more exposed. Of course, you were incredibly grateful that Tom had planned this weekend away for the two of you (after a work commitment, hence the presence of his manger, makeup artist and Harry). But it was scary.

Coming out of Euston station, the earlier time meant the train had been more of a hive of activity. Kids running up and down the aisle, inevitably recognising Tom and then asking for a photo. Enough that you’d had to move a few seats down the carriage, so no one would associate you travelling with the a-lister. 

But after you’d past Birmingham and the clocks past eleven pm, everything had quietened down and Tom convinced you to come and sit next to him on the table of four.  Andrew and Rachel were taking use of their little duo seat across for you to catch up on some well needed beauty sleep. They’d all been working with Tom doing promo for his most recent movie in London so it’d been pretty 24/7.

That left you, with all the energy, contrasting greatly with the two flagging Holland boys. 

“Lets play heads up!” You announced to the much less enthusiastic faces round the tables. 

“You can’t play that quietly and the whole carriage dont want to listen to you screeching.” Harry rolled his eyes whilst slightly ripping into you, then picking up his phone - thinking that would shut you up.

“I can play quietly!” You huffed, looking for Tom for backing… which never came. He didn’t even need to try and defend himself before you whacked his chest in false-annoyance. 

“ It’s not a bad thing, just passion.” Tom murmured, desperately attempting to sweet talk your round - which of course, was not going to happen. 

“No way! I’ll prove it to you!” 

“Nonono darling, look I’m tired.” He straight refused, wrappings his arms round your shoulders to try and cage you in. He ended up with his back pressed against the window and your back against his chest. “Lemme just relax with my best girl.”  You huffed in reply, worming round in his clutch before eventually giving up and relaxing your head onto his collar bone. For the reasons previously mentioned, you did not for a second believe he was serious with this PDA. Just sitting next to each other was risky enough,  now he was very clearly hugging you in a public place. Arching your neck back, you were shocked he already had his eyes shut - looking perfectly contented and relaxed. 

“T, are you serious?” You whispered, making him crack one eye open with a questioning look. Instantly he knew what you meant, I mean, it was him that was most worried about people finding out about you - for your sake. His horror stories of previous relationships hadn’t helped, to the point now only your mum dad and siblings knew about your relationship to Tom - mainly for the sole reason your nan was the biggest gossip in the world and could NOT be trusted. 

“Course love, it’ll be fine no ones around and I got my cap on. No one will notice us.”

Foolproof. Or so you both thought. 

And honestly for an hour or so you relished in the fact that in a public space, your boyfriend was showing you physical affection. It was exciting, which meant as Tom’s arms grew lax round you as he slumped slightly in the chair your energy only increased. No one else was being any use either - Harry had his head in his arms on the table and similarly neither Rachel nor Andrew were conscious enough to keep you company. Finally you settled on playing a game on your phone whilst also ever so softly wiggling round on Tom’s chest, purely because you enjoyed the little huffs and the way he’d squeeze you tighter as he snoozed. 

You were engrossed in shitty little iPhone game when a person who was walking down the aisle slowed down, drawing your attention away from the phone. And then your heart literally dropped because you instantly recognised your uncle and cousin, who was 12. Worse though, they had most definitely clocked you. 

Of all people, your uncle and boy cousin too. Possible the best (or worst depending on your point of view) at winding you up, at messing  with you, for genuinely causing all chaos and mischief with you. They were most certainly not going to be discrete. They’d rib you till your dying day. 

“Y/n?” Your uncle spoke first, noticing the that the group you with all seemed to be asleep, so at least trying to be a bit sensitive. Not that it mattered on Tom’s part though, you instantly bolted up and away from him, making him groan as he slowly woke up. 

“Er yeh, I-um  fancy seeing you guys here. Why were you in London?” Because yes half your family did live in manchester - a fact you felt slightly guilty about, considering you couldn’t fit in a quick and explainable reason as to  why you were in that area of the UK during a ‘pop in’. So you’d chosen to keep the whole trip a secret too.

“We’ve been at the footie, could ask you the same question.” Your uncle smirked, noticing toward Tom, who now was blinking his eyes heavily - looking with furrowed brows between the two of you. 

Because yes, the cap had been great to stop people recognising Tom. Neither of you were to expect it’d be you that’d be YOU stopped by someone who noticed you. 

“Oh um… well er this is my friend Tom, he’s got a work thing in manchester so thought I’d tag along. What was the score?” Yes you described your boyfriend of 9 months as a friend, when it was clear to everyone you were more than that. Though frankly, you still felt sick introducing him as ‘boyfriend’ - that itself was cringe as hell. The reference to football was an in-vain attempt to distract them with the most-boring-sport-in-the-world talk. If only Tom had kept his mouth shut. 

“Sorry mate” His voice was a little hoarse, making him force a cough before stretching his hand out. “I’m Tom”

“Nice to meet you, I’m Ritchie and this is Matt” Your uncle motioned to his twelve year old son who was smiling politely but his expression seemed to drop as he made eye contact with Tom. Blissfully unaware, Tom shook Ritchies hand your a soft smile. 

“How do you guys-“

“I’m her uncle. Tell you what, didn’t imagine bumping into my niece on the 11:30 train to manchester.” 

Tom’s face fell and he froze. You’d both been caught out. Massively. It couldn’t get worse, till it did. 

“Y/n is that Spiderman?” Because yes, Matt was prime Marvel fanboy age. And yes, of course his favourite hero was Spiderman. And yes, this would probably be the most exciting day of his life. And the most embarrassing of yours. 

It was at this point Harry was sufficiently disturbed, enough to make him sit upright whilst also backing away into the corner of the booth, watching from afar.

“I-uh” You didnt really want to say it, for the sake of that meant he was revealing this secret you’d guarded with your life. But at the same time, you had this overwhelming sense of pride for Tom because “yeh, yes he is spiderman.” Matt started jumping up and down like an overexcited boyband fan which made you laugh, heart swelling as Tom chuckled along beside you.

Yes by no means was this ideal. And yes you were now forced to tell your family (so ultimately the world) about your relationship. Maybe that wasn’t so bad though?

hope u enjoyed + thank you for reading <333

tagging: @hollandfanficlove @hallecarey1