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bangtaninborderland · 1 year ago

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Risk It All (22) - Don’t lie, We aren’t friends.

Genre: Chishiya x F! Reader, smut, angst.

Warning: mentions of abuse starting from “you don’t so someone has to.” You can skip this by jumping to “you watch his face as tears flood your own.”

A/N: I’m sorry to leave it on a cliff hanger 😭 I’ll write the other chapter up today/tomorrow for y’all 😭

Ch.21| Masterlist| Ch.23

“I care about you too.” You whispered, your heart racketing against your chest. “I really do Chishiya.”

He pressed his forehead against yours for a moment longer, his breath heavy. “Let’s go.”

“Okay, where?” You asked, stepping back as he released your shoulders.

“There are a few stores a little further out, we could walk to the edge of the games, it’s likely the shooter won’t come that far out we will have to take back roads, we could stop in the house to gather whatever is there. Anything else we will get on the way.” You watch as he packs up the medical gear back into the small pouch of the backpack. “Are you okay to walk?”

“I’m yeah, fine.” You mumble, the pain slightly kicking in. “We can take the road behind the church a few minutes away, my dad took us a few times as kids.”

He looked at you almost as if analysing your opinion before nodding his head, slipping the straps over his shoulders. “You never talk about your dad.”

“You never ask. Besides what’s the reason for telling a story that holds no good.” You shrugged, regretting it instantly as your arm roared in a dull pain.

“Oh yeah, I should have mentioned that, don’t move too much and you shouldn’t have any pain.” He chuckles.

“You couldn’t have mentioned that before?” You hiss, cradling your arm.

His gaze is empty. “I could have I just didn’t, besides I didn’t realise I had to state the obvious. Stay here and let me check outside.”

“Whatever.” You groan, resting carefully against the wall.

You watch as he ducks his head outside the emergency exit, the electricity somehow disabling the noise of the alarm usually accompanied with the opening of the fire door. “It’s clear we can go just stay low and be quiet until we are a little further out.”

You watch the floor as you walk over to him, slipping out of the ajar door. “Do you think he is near?”

“I doubt it. There are no rules he can go whenever he wants, he is probably looking for the most populated area. The only way to stop him is to probably kill him but with all those guns it seems impossible.”

The faint sounds of gunshots linger in the air, the city smelling lightly of iron, of blood. “So what we head back to the house and then mountain climb? I think Usagi would be a better fit for that. Don’t you think we should find everyone else first?”

“That would be pointless. We would have to go back to the city and we would put ourselves and everyone else in danger to try and find them. Being in a group bigger than 2 is a risk, even us being together is a risk.” He explained, although his eyes were trained on the plainest of things such as the overgrown greenery or the rocks beneath his feet it was easy to see he was aware of everything. Anticipating the worst with every step.

“I guess you’re right, I just worry. Do you think they are okay?”

“How am I supposed to know, I couldn’t really care.” He shrugs, frowning.

“Seriously why are you such an asshole? I refuse to believe you were born like this.” You huff, kicking a stone at him. Regardless of the childishness of the action, you felt it was very much deserved.

“Because the world isn’t as good as you like to believe it is, you have misplaced hope.” He laughs lowly, shaking his head In bemusement. “It’s adorable actually.”

“I would take that as a compliment if It didn’t sound so condescending. The world has good you just have to know where to find it.”

“If the world is so good why isn’t your sister with you?”

You don’t know when you started crying but you felt the tears fall, the sentence enough to cause you more pain than a gunshot ever could. “Fuck you.”

“Oh come on don’t tell me THAT's what gets you upset.”

“You have no right to talk about her.”

“Well, you don’t so someone has to.”

“You fucking asshole. If you want to know so bad then it’s because she was different, she was blind and because of that, my father killed her. He hated her, hated that she was so independent despite her difference. My mother moved away when we were kids because she was tired of my dad hitting her, she couldn’t take us so she got another job in another country and left us behind. I tried to protect my sister but I couldn’t. One day he had too much to drink and within seconds he turned. He started hitting everything, there was glass everywhere. My sister was trying to protect me from him but he pulled her down the stairs. She slipped on a piece of glass and it killed her instantly. She didn’t have a moment of freedom from him. They ruled her death as an accident due to her blindness. He got away with a suspended year-long sentence for abuse. I left straight after and tried to live a good life, to honour her and to see the good in every moment of darkness just like she was for me. So yes I believe there is good in the world Chishiya because someone like my sister existed. Someone who despite facing the worst every single day came through it with a smile on her face.” You pulled out the necklace that had once belonged to her. “This is all I have of her, this is all that’s left of my family.”

You watch his face as tears flood your own. Maybe it was the blurry vision you had but for a second it almost seemed as if he was sad for you, upset. His eyebrows furrowed in shock. “That’s… quite the story.”

You realised then you’d given him exactly what he had wanted, you’d told him everything about the worst you’d been through. You knew he was smart but to trick you into talking about it was something else. “You did that on purpose.”

He laughed, nodding. “You are starting to understand me more.”

“I’ll never understand you.” You shook your head, tucking away your necklace with your good hand.

“I see why you believe in good now let me tell you why I believe in bad. I was a doctor before we all came here.”

“Your patients must have really hated you with your shitty bedside manner.” You rolled your eyes, he really wasn’t what you thought he would be.

“My patients were children and for the most part they actually liked me but regardless of what I did, I could only save the lives of those that had parents to bribe the hospital. Transplants weren’t given to those that needed it but to those that could afford it. I watched child after child die all because of corruption. That is why I believe there is no good. Because even when doing a job that is perceived to be good it is built on an ugly foundation.”

“That’s horrible Chish I’m so sorry. That doesn’t mean the world is bad, the place you were in was bad, the corruption was bad but the children were good.” You wanted to plead with him, to show him how good the world could be but even you knew he would have to see that for himself.

“You’ve got to let that nickname go.” He states bluntly. Checking around a corner as you continue your journey back to the small house.

“I couldn’t ever do that it annoys you too much. So did you become a doctor because you wanted to help people?”

“No. My parents.”

“Oh. Are they still alive?”

“Let’s not do that thing where we share life stories like we are best friends.”

“One second you worry about me the next you hate me, pick a side already. Are you SURE you’re not bipolar?” You laugh. Hoping to lighten the sudden tension between you.

“You confuse me and I don’t like that.” He huffs in irritation.

“Why?” You cock your head, your eyes were wide.

“Because caring in any situation is dangerous.”

You don’t press any more, leaving him to his thoughts as you consider your own. The walk is quiet, thankfully, with no close gunshots or dead bodies. The other games hadn’t seemed to have started yet. The indication lights on the other blimps are off rather than shining the red light as the King of Spades did.

You reach the new place you’d called home an hour or so later, the sun still bright in the sky. You turn to Chishiya. “Do you think everyone else is back home living normally? Having lunch? Playing sports?”

“I would like to think that this is some sort of mental thing, maybe our bodies are elsewhere. Maybe this is a drug trial gone wrong.” It secretly scares you just how little you all know, the world you are in is utterly different from the one you knew for the entirety of your previous life, the life that feels so long ago.

“Whatever it is let’s figure this out. So what we head to the mountains? I don’t think I can climb with my arm like this.”

“Well, then you should stay here.” He continues walking around the house, shoving things into his bag. “I’ll be gone a few hours and then be back it’s not a big deal you can just rest and make food or something.” Maybe see if you can find an old map and trace the borders that we know on it.

“You can’t go alone Chishiya.” You were firm, the thought of him going out alone scared you. “I’ll come with you it will be fine.”

He pointed to your bandages. “Let me check your arm.”

“You dressed it a few hours ago it’s fine.” You shook your head.

“I’ll go by myself then.” He heads towards the door, looking for a jacket of sorts.

“No, NO!” You shout making him turn to you. “You can check it.”

“Well, that was a short tantrum. Sit down.”

You take a seat on the small stool in the kitchen, close enough to the table so he can lay out whatever he needs. “I couldn’t see it properly in that building it will be safer to check it again.”

“Please just don’t hurt me.” You wince, already imagining the pain of the wound.

“I’ll try my best.” He is careful as he unwraps the bandage. “It looks deeper than I thought, I'll have to stitch it up.”

“Needle and thread stitch?” You feel your palms begin to sweat.

“Unfortunately yes. I have some numbing cream it should take away the pain.”

“What about pain killer?” You ask, hopeful.

“I have a stronger one here but you have to take it crushed up.” He explains, watching as you consider it.

“What will happen if I don’t?”

“It will take twice as long to heal and it could get infected. I’m sure even you know what that means.”

You hated how he sounded whenever he explained things to you, always sounding as though talking to an inferior child. “Why do you treat me like I’m so dumb.”

“How do I know you’re not?” He smirks, opening the painkillers.

“I studied literacy, I am a writer. I am educated. Stop acting like I’m so dumb-witted person because I have just as much knowledge as you do, maybe not in exactly the same way but I’m not unequal to you.” You wanted respect from him. Maybe too much.

You watch as he grinds them down, pouring them into a cup of juice. “This will take away the bad taste. Take them whilst I prepare the thread.”

You took the drink silently, gagging at the taste of the crushed pills but thankful for his idea to add the flavouring. “Chishiya how bad will it hurt?”

“I’ll try my best to make it easy just relax.” He explains, threading the needle.

“Will you talk to me whilst you do it? Help distract me?”

“Okay. Just don’t move too much.” You winced as he rubbed in the numbing lotion. “Leave it a minute and I’ll begin.”

“I’ve had stitches before but I was a kid in an equipped hospital and it certainly wasn’t like this.” You gestured to the table and then the window. He seemed to understand as he laughed lightly.

You watched as he picked up the needle, bringing it to your arm. “You know I was working the day I came here?”

You bit down on your tongue as the thread pierced the skin. “Fuck.”

“I know I know, don’t talk okay just breathe. It was late and I didn’t know what was going on. It was weird when I got here there didn’t seem to be so many people. I was supposed to assist a heart transplant for a child, it was the first time I’d actually seen a transplant to be given under the first circumstances. I wanted to be a doctor because of my dad, I thought I’d I became a doctor we would have more in common and he would have liked me a little better but that didn’t happen. It was an immature wish.”

You were thankful for his speaking, it served as a great distraction. “I’m sorry you deserved, ouch, you deserved better chish.”

“I said don’t talk.” He shook his head in disappointment.

“What do you want to do after we get out of here?”

“I’ll quit my job. I don’t know anything else I don’t think about it. There’s no point in thinking of a future that may not come you have to be present at the moment. You have to think for the you that exists now, not the you that will exist in however long.”

When he stopped to explain things without having a condescending tone it was easier to understand and accept things from his point of view, regardless of how warped it was. The you that existed now will be the you that exists in the future, but you didn’t tell him that. You couldn’t. “How much longer?”

“You’re all done.” He smiled, closing the stitch. “It doesn’t take long, how was the pain?”

“Better than being shot again I suppose.” You refrain from shrugging remembering the pain from earlier.

“How do you feel?”

“Really uh- dizzy?” You stood up, holding on to the table for support. “Chishiya I don’t feel good.”

“I know. I’m sorry.”

That was the last thing you heard before everything switched off, a darkness encasing you. When you opened your eyes it was dark, the sun had set, and the house was only illuminated by the small lamp. “Chishiya?”

You had no response and the lack of movement in the house only spoke to one thing… he was gone.

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fillinforlater · 1 year ago

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i kinda agrer w the anon like ig the older members r fine but if u plan on writing for new jeans rhe maknae is 14/15…

A measured Response

While I think the other anon who send the initially accusation is still the one sending asks to my inbox, I also think that you are another person. I will strengthen and steel-man your concerns/argument, though it will always baffle me that y'all have these ridiculous spelling errors. Seriously, guys, at least try to type coherent messages/a literal paragraph with no mistakes.

(To those of you who do, thank you <3)

For some fucking reason I feel like I have to make this a thing. I should not, really. These accusations are baseless, I'm not the thing he wants to frame me as, so on and so on, but because I think you are genuinely kinda worried what I meant, I'll explain it to you.

(I'm not sorry if I sound condescending or anything, because I am)

It started with this ask, which basically asked me:

"Do you plan on writing NewJeans in the future?"

Now, being human and (probably) understanding English as well as context, this is what I (and probably 99% of other people with the right context) assumed this person meant:

"Do you plan on writing a fic about any of the 18+ NewJeans members in the future?"

bUt tHaT iSnT wHaT tHeY aSkEd!?

You cannot possibly reach that conclusion. Seriously, go look at literally every fic I ever wrote. Age of the idols? Ranging from 30 something down to 18, the absolute hard legal and (I guess) moral minimum, the line I don't cross.

If you go to my page or just open this weird ass tab from Tumblr (fuck Tumblr), you see stuff like "18+ Girl Group fic writer" or "No minors" or (from my Biaslists & Writelist & Requests tab) "Remember that I said most and 18+. This automatically excluded all 18- idols... I won't write those." This is easily understandable, obvious context to the message from above.

Or did you think I would just write about literal new jeans, like an review or something? No, of course not.

Oh, you can also look at my response, like... I specifically mention Hanni and Danielle, two 18+ idols, very popular, probably the two (including I guess Minji) the asker probably meant.

Now the point where I might look like an idiot if I take you seriously:

I responded to the baseless accusation with a GIF of Hanni, the focus on an easily identifiable part (her ass). The response of the accuser (still in my inbox):

"You just admitted you're a pedo"

Wrong and cringe.

Granted, you did not know this message (if you are a different person), yet you still, after seeing the Hanni GIF decided to say this. Either you are fucking stupid or this is maliciously framing me. Pick your poison.

(BTW: You are stupid because Hanni is 18. International age. Whatever the fuck Koreans use/used to use does not count, but she is also "19"/an adult there)

If you now need it black on white (or white on black), here it goes:

I'm not a pedo. I'm even against idols debuting under the age of 18.

(Why did I even bother? I dunno man, now it's out of the system)

With that said, I got some ideas for a Hanni fic (still very basic, but god, she is gorgeous and hot) and for a Danielle fic (funnily, it's not even a smut).

Everyone, have a nice day and some pretty Minji <3

#kpop smut #female idol smut #newjeans smut #newjeans fanfic #why am I responding to idiots

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thatfinewine · 1 year ago

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Silly little oneshot that turned in a direction I hadn't intended but went with anyway. Prompt from @potetosaradas was "Blips and Chitz", and the pairing Rick Prime/(young) Rick C-137. It isn't explicitly shippy, but hopefully it's still enjoyable. 🙏

Every so often Rick has to acknowledge that he can't handle all of who Prime is.

(Prime truly does not give a shit. Rick gives too much of a shit.)

“Eh, you win some you lose some,” Prime shrugged nonchalantly as he tossed the helmet game controller down onto the dashboard of the machine, where it landed precariously close to the edge. He got up from the cramped-but-plush seats and made a show of stretching his long legs, while Rick followed and stood up after him from the opposite chair.

“We wouldn’t ‘lose some’ if you’d quit making us lose!” Rick snapped as he (much more carefully) set his own helmet down and readjusted Prime’s closer to the center of the console without thinking.

Prime reached down and tore off the measly amount of tickets the machine spit out for them. “Hey; I was having fun shooting Space Fascists—”

“—Instead of protecting the civilians! Like the objective told us to do!”

“I mean, you made it sound like you had that part pretty handled—”

“—until you blew the whole left wing of the Feds’ ship off and it crashed down on top of us and killed everyone!”

“—which wouldn’t have happened if those pig bastards knew how to steer their own ship. They drive like male Obravadians! Man, it’s like they were aiming for you guys – actually, it was kinda funny.”

Prime had already started moving on towards his next objective, leaving Rick to catch up with him. Rick, mood visibly soured from the loss, didn’t find any of it even slightly amusing. When Prime caught the look, he rolled his eyes in a comically obvious way. “Anyone who has taste would find it funny, anyway,” he grumbled, purposefully loud enough to be heard over the ambient noise of the arcade.

“Sorry I don’t find watching innocents being crushed to death funny.”

The air around Prime shifted, the growing tension seemingly choking out the oxygen between them.

“Rick,” Prime said, emphasizing the name with the condescending sort of tone of a teacher who’s disappointed in a student. “You know you can’t let yourself get all tangled up in small stuff like that.”

Rick felt his face and chest grow hot with embarrassed anger. Prime spoke about other living beings as if they were hardly more than a footnote to him, but the loss of life never felt ‘small’ to Rick. That was a conscious being, snuffed right out of existence, losing the most precious thing ever gifted to any of them – life. A single life that could never be brought back once it was gone. But the two of them had argued about this so many times before, and this was supposed to be a fun, low-stakes day out playing video games…

“I know,” he answered quietly, sounding simultaneously defeated and bitter about it.

It was moments like these that were chilling reminders of what Prime was like to everyone else. He was generally good to Rick because he liked Rick. But Prime didn’t harbor any sort of meaningful fondness for anything else besides creation and discovery. Rick was an anomaly to him, something that had such a low chance of happening that it was basically a nonexistence; an impossibility. It made the heat inside of him run cold; as if a block of ice settled into Rick’s ribcage, where it slowly melted into his veins, as he stood in the face of their reality.

Prime found the universe fascinating as he watched life crop up and die as if it were nothing but cells under a microscope.

Rick thought it was wrong to see a disaster happening and do nothing to stop it when he very well had the power to.

Prime said that ‘right’ and ‘wrong’ are societal constructs and aren’t even real. In the beginning he thought that Rick’s ‘planetary mindset’ was… cute. But as the same conversation kept circling back around… he was getting annoyed at having to repeat himself.

“You’re not stupid, Rick. I know you’re not stupid.”

Rick hated those words so much it made him feel sick.

“I know you’re not stupid. So why do you keep acting like it?”

The feeling of how finite the universe truly was became heavier around Rick, putting pressure on his heart to the point where it hurt to keep beating. How could two people stay by each other's sides and make a relationship work when their fundamental moral compasses couldn’t align?

“Why does it matter, then? I-I-I’m not asking you to— to do anything, I’ll do it all myself. If nothing matters, why does it pi-p-pi-piss you off so much that I want to save lives?”

“Is that really what you’re going to spend the rest of your life doing? You could be inventing literally anything! You could be doing anything! And you’re choosing to waste your own invaluable time simply postponing death for some thing that’s not even going to benefit you? They’re going to die, Rick. They’re all going to die. So you spend a week stopping a flood and helping rebuild a town – then what? You’re going to leave, feeling all proud of yourself for earning these hero points you invented as a reward and to feel like there’s a balance to the universe and it’s not all chaos – and after you leave, the dam breaks again, or a volcano erupts, or an asteroid slams into the planet, or a burst of solar radiation hits them and wipes out everything.”

“That’s—”

“—Or another space-faring alien shows up and decides they want the resources and have no use for the people and pick them all off! Maybe sell them as slaves for a quick buck! And this is happening to millions of planets - all with sapient life - right now, in this very universe, right this very second, and here you are helping none of them. So then what, are you choosing which life deserves to survive with your benevolent help?”

“No, I-I’ll—”

“—Are you going to clone yourself so you can be in billions of places at once, stopping every single disaster on every single planet? Are you going to lay awake at night beating yourself up over the ones you didn’t save, wasting even more of your time?”

“...”

“…Do you see how ridiculous you sound to me now? Come on, Rick. Look out for yourself - and if a stupid fucking species is going to wipe themselves out with nuclear war, let them. You’ve fooled yourself into believing that you care. …If you want to then just do it, but don’t act like it makes you a saint. You’re not. You’re Rick Sanchez.”

They usually don’t talk for days afterward.

“I’ll give you time to calm down and actually use that brain of yours. I know you’re not stupid, Rick.”

Rick didn’t even look over as he heard Prime let loose an exaggerated groan. “Oh my God,” he complained, drawing out the title into a word that took two whole seconds to say, “stop pouting.”

“I’m not pouting,” Rick snapped back, as he actively made an effort to stop pursing his lips and slumping his shoulders. It wasn’t pouting. It was… it was…

“We came here to have fun – it’s a fucking space arcade! You really can ruin anything, huh?”

The good times were so good, but the bad times were so bad.

“It’s a talent,” Rick muttered, trying not to sound like he was marking up a list in his head of the pros and cons of choosing this man as his partner.

Prime shot him a sidelong glance and gave his cosmic twin’s face a quick once-over. Rick often wondered what Prime’s mental list was. How long did Rick even have before the scales tipped out of his favor and he lost his appeal? What would happen to him then?

Existence was finite, after all.

Even for Gods.

#my writing #rick sanchez #young rick sanchez #rick prime #prickcest #precanon prickcest #fanfic #casual topic of death and moral dilemmas nbd #prime truly does not give a shit #rick gives too much of a shit #god I never post writing but I swear I sometimes do write #debatably #gotta get it out before s7 comes out and kicks me right in the teeth

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vampirewillows · 8 months ago

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Hi! Rüdeger anon here!!!

Rüdeger's reaction at Andreas finding them at the library it very telling to me personally. He doesn't reject or distance himself from Mathieu or their relationship, implying to me that he might not necessarily feel guilt over their relationship, rather like you said fear over the consequences of being found out. That's not to say he's never felt guilty or the guilt might come in waves, (because I do think that in all likelihood he might) but I think what might actually worry him is the breaking of his vows rather than loving Mathieu. I also think the fact that monastic being separated from secular life is precisely why he is able to be in his relationship, and acess/understand his queerness. A lot of monks/priests/nuns do describe being "married" to God and I suppose in that sense there is a fulfilment and comfort if you are queer and part of the clergy, maybe not being able to be in a relationship with person, but being able to acess that same affection through God. I think Rüdeger would have a complicated but not entirely fraught relationship with his faith and queerness.

Personal hc: this is totally not projection onto a fictional character lmao. But I think Rüdeger could have OCD. Especially in regards to scrupulosity/routine/his anxiety. Someone needs to get him some St Johns wort stat!!!

I have a lot of thoughts/feelings about Rüdeger/Mathieu that I can't articulate rn but I'd love to hear more of your thoughts if you're willing!!!! I hope this isn't too much spam!!! ❤️‍🔥🕊️

hi! not too much spam at all, thank you for writing back! <3

I also think the fact that monastic being separated from secular life is precisely why he is able to be in his relationship, and acess/understand his queerness

good point!! i mentioned the monastery course i took, and as an atheistic (partially anti-theistic) queer person, it was during the first lecture that i really got why someone would want to join a monastic community (sorry if that sounds condescending, i mean it sincerely). like, it's entirely possible that if i were to have lived in a different era, i would've become a nun just to escape secular obligations of marriage/children/whatnot. obvi it would've been different for men vs women but still. and also co-signed on the rest of your points

re: ocd, i admittedly don't know much about it, so i'm sorry in advance if i say very obvious OR stupid things. but i'm curious if the daily schedule of monks, which would've by its nature been very repetitive/structured/consistent, would be helpful? like finding a sense of peace and stability in the knowledge that most days are the same. and that's another reason why the town riot is so hard on him - it disrupts these routines, displaces his place in the world, potentially triggers compulsive thoughts - hence why mathieu says he's "been deep in prayer" ever since they fled to the library. like he's going back to his routines as a coping mechanism (compulsively repeating the prayer, because something is wrong > if i do x y and z it can be fixed?)

sidebar since i went back to look at that scene again, it's so so sweet how, when andreas is encouraging him to sing to the others, he says "i believe in you and mathieu believes in you" :( they're in love your honour. in general mathieu being so comforting and gentle here gives me brainrot

if at any point you have more rüdeger/mathieu (or pentiment in general) thoughts i'd love to hear them! thanks again for sending these asks <3

#oh to be a neurotic 16th century monk being cared for by my stoic partner who only let's himself relax around me........ anyway #pentiment #asks

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swamp-gremlin · 7 months ago

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My Old Nick hc's, interpretation, analysis, and other odd bits PT.1

Part 2

This is long overdue but I feel I oughta get something out of the way. I've had a incredibly aggressive special interest in him for like 3-5ish years and at some point in writing hc's I just started making shit up(I mean isn't that just hc's are?) because I really just took a guy with a whopping 14 lines of dialogue and just started sprinting.

I'm choosing to actually leave a few things out as I wish to explore those ideas more in This isn't over Jack, Ill probably swing back around to this after I wrap that up. In the mean time if you wanna swap ideas I'm down(please please please pleaseplea)

Turns out I hit text limit with this oh my lord, ill post pt2 tomorrow, i'm sorry

Can't think of anything particularly triggering in this but i'll warn it gets just kinda bleak

Human turned Fae- I will not elaborate, this will be explained later...

would actually break your legs if you called him a fairy

I've never actually pinned down any specific powers for him for some reason? like i just cant think of like any that i could write/ illustrate that wouldn't feel too gauche... So I just kinda nebulously imaged so weird fae-fuckery type of magic- though I think the most compelling interpretation of his powers was in Scouts Australian Christmas (pls go read it, its a really good fic)

Gay, but I cant imagine he's like particularly out about it; like its a iykyk sorta think because I definitely feel there probably some shame or internalized homophobia there (smth smth homophobic senator caught in a gay bar joke)

Autistic, but most definitely not diagnosed- he would become absolute incensed if you suggested it, like "There is nothing wrong with me, I am normal" but you can tell that he knows there's something "wrong with him" but he has no idea what and is incredibly afraid of even attempting to confront that

Can't imagine there's a moment where he's not masking, he doesn't understand his own limits and will keep doing things until he quite literally can't anymore

Probably has some ~effeminate~ interest he's deeply embarrassed by, but like in all reality its very normal and even if it was thats not a bad thing, he just makes it a big deal for no reason

STRADDLING the line between infodumping and mansplaining

Could be genuinely into a topic but he's just so condescending about it

High functioning alcoholic, kinda in that 50s/ rich way but it's very obvious he has a problem but everyone always brushes it off as "thats just how he is/ things are"

Nick could honestly just be summed up in his impact as a *a systematic bad thing happens again and again* "thats just how things are, get over it" sorta thing or a "Heart warming: student raises funds to prevent orphans from being sent to orphan grinder" and then no-one questions why the orphan grinder exists in the first place

He has been meticulously constructing his public image/ brand as "Old Nick"/ "The Spirit of Australian Christmas"

He is a liar, but he's a very good liar

His accent is fake, his laugh is fake, his public lore is fake and he's not even Australian he's British! (Which is arguably worst thing he has done)

He's basically been voice training to keep up a modern australian accent for years now, but his real accent is more of that 1700s british (which actually sounds different from modern a modern britsh accent) but sometimes he's has moments and his accent slips (mostly when he's yelling)

Has practiced his evil villain laugh so hard, like its a good villain laugh but if you listen hard you can tell its not real

Genuinely so fucking embarrassed by his actual laugh which i can only describe as if a goose that has been smoking a pack a day was being strangled to death

I kinda go back an forth on Nicks upbringing sometimes, because I kinda feel I went the kinda overplayed sorta tragic backstory; but also growing up in 1700s England was probably not fun if you weren't rich and also have you ever met a miserable boomer who does the whole "kids these days are too damn soft back when I was a kid *recounts an incredibly traumatizing event*!" Thing? Yeah he probably does that a lot and it makes everyone kinda uncomfortable

Maybe orphaned? Probably had brothers because he has strong younger brother "your oppressing me by giving me a task" energy (btw this relates to a super stupid hc that im not gonna share because its incredibly dumb)

Expressed a lot of attention seeking behavior from a young age, would purposefully get into trouble so someone would notice him

This behavior followed him into adult life and it would just keep getting worst and worst, like getting into bar fights that he would definitely lose and petty crime

Eventually he just kept ramping up the severity of his crimes till he actually had a warrant/ bounty placed for his arrest

To avoid getting arrested he became a sailor in his late 20s and jumped between ships and trades up until his 50s/60s

Eventually he was arrested and then get shipped off to Australia

After a few months he stuck there he was like "actually, fuck this" and started plotting an escape

He stole a boat and with his previous knowledge from being a sailor he was so full of himself he thought he did single-handedly sail and navigate back Britain or a British sympathetic colony and then lay low for the rest of his life

Of course he didn't happen and due to the fact he is stupid he got stranded in antarctic and the rest is history

If you wanna know how we got from "random crusty criminal" to "Spirit of Australian Christmas" you have to stick around for my shit ass comic and videos fucker

anyway where was i, Nick proceeded to twists that into "Yeah i totally meant to do discover antarctic, even though i was a 1780s peasant who would have not have even known that antarctic was even thing" he kinda sorta dropped the rest of it and made up more shit Homelander style

I don't believe that Nick was like well off in anyway when he was still mortal, and despite being just bludgeoned over the head with the effects of classism and a nightmare capitalist hell society he developed this horrible idolization of the rich and developed this almost "by your bootstraps" mentality but with like the brutality rich bushiness owners would treat there workers, where he though if he became horrible and ruthless he could trample and climb on the backs of his fellow men till he made it to that oh so coveted high society life.

probably doesn't help he would do absolutely anything for money either

and the thing is he made it, he's just unfathomably rich(that is till all those gambling debts catch up to him...) he got what he wanted, he got he's gotten all the money and attention he could have wanted... and yet he's miserable, nothing will ever be enough for him.

Throw back motif that's still my favorite- "decaying luxury". Nick is like obviously rich as fuck and yet just refuses to fix anything, like his sweater has so many little holes in it he just stopped bothering to fix, he's patched his pants so many times, stairs worn down to the point the rug is thread bear and the wood is dented, intricate arsenic and lead laced wallpaper that's now water damaged and peeling, his favorite chair's seams are ripped, and the stuffing and springs are just compressed and flat to the point its not even comfortable to sit in anymore. Like he can fix it, he has the money, and yet he just won't for some reason.

Oh speaking of arsenic and lead- mans is just absolutely FULL of lead, arsenic, asbestos, any other harmful thing the Victorians where just absolutely HUFFING

tangent on a tangent, i really associate him with the Victorian era despite him being born in the 1700s, maybe its the child labor, maybe its the stupid chops, he just looks like he should be in super tall neck-line and doing coke for a headache

Nick is just both incredibly self absorbed but also so fucking insecure, like very big insecure man makes his problems everyone else's problem and take his out on other people to feel better about himself energy

He's just so vain too, like i image he's just obsessed with himself and his image, probably doesn't help he's quite literately has been decomposing for like the last two centuries (IT WILL BE EXPLAINED WHY LATER I PROMMY) so he just has this like incredibly extensive Patrick Bateman ass self-care routine so he doesn't get moldy

#hey have you ever wanted to listen to the ramblings of a fucking mad man? here you go bc god does writing this out make me sound crazy #i did not expect to hit char limit with this dear god...#and for a guy that hasn't been relevant since 2011 #im genuinely so nervous to post this bc this is just so much but this is what its like in my head 24/7 i have to live like this #tf2 #tf2 headcanons #tf2 old nick #from the mouth of madness #old nick tf2

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another-whump-sideblog · 2 years ago

Text

Jane’s Pets Chapter 59: Tidying Up

TWs in the tags

Masterlist

It’s actually been a very long time since you last cleaned. You didn’t have a house to clean for quite a while, and then Puppy never accepted help with cleaning. So, to your embarrassment, you are messing up quite a lot.

“Oh, don’t use that on the glass!” Diya shouts, alarmed.

“Sorry, sorry.” You drop everything you were holding, which is also unhelpful. “Sorry, I’m being stupid.”

Stupid Bunny.

“What? You’re not stupid. I just didn’t give you specific enough instructions. Greg needs really specific instructions, too, and they’re really smart. I’ll show you what cleaners go to what, and then we’ll discuss what specific chores you’ll be responsible for.”

Over the next several hours, Diya delivers painstaking instructions for every possible chore you might end up doing in your time here. Some of it is very helpful, informing you of things you wouldn’t have known to ask about. Some of it is things that seem very obvious to you, but Diya has a way of making it not feel condescending at all. Ey just wants you to have all the information. Unfortunately, trying to maintain focus on what ey’s talking about for so long is causing a headache to grow.

The headaches have been so much less intense since you got away from Jane, but this one is really bad. You should really tell Diya what’s going on, but something is stopping you and you’re not sure what it is.

Diya gasps when ey sees the time (there are clocks here). “I didn’t know it had been that long! I would’ve had us take breaks!”

You wince at eir volume. “It’s fine. Thanks for explaining all that.”

“Thanks for listening to me for three hours!Do you have any questions?”

You shake your head. Ow.

“Good!” Does Diya have to shout everything ey says? “Let’s take a break, and then we can fit you into our chore schedule. If you want! It feels weird to bring you here and immediately assign you chores.”

“I want to. I’d like to feel like I’m contributing, and it would give me something to do.” Best to follow their rules, to do what they do. That’s what got you screwed last time, going into the basement.

“Makes sense! We all have some chores we like and some we hate, so we try to arrange it to be as enjoyable for everyone as possible. And there’s some that no one likes, so we take turns. But that’s not important right now, because we’re taking a break!”

Diya charges into the living room. You’re not sure if ey wants you to follow, but you do. You’d be heading to the living room anyway.

Diya is looking at the bookcase in the living room. “Do you want to do something together? Or do you want to be alone for a bit? What kind of break is the most…” ey pauses. “Rejuvenating? No, restful…No wait! Relaxing! Relaxing, that’s it. What kind of break is the most relaxing for you?”

You collapse onto the couch and pull a blanket over your head. “I’d rather just… rest my eyes for a while. If that’s okay.”

“Of course it’s okay! I’ll just read for a while. We’ll see if we feel ready to get back to talking about chores in about… 30 minutes? Does that sound good?”

You nod and try to find a comfortable position beneath the blanketz

Puppy wakes up being yanked by her hair. Terror clogs her throat. Did she fall asleep without permission? Did she sleep in?

“What’s this, Puppy? It looks like a tornado came through here.”

Puppy doesn’t respond. She doesn’t have permission.

“Did you really sleep on the floor? Could you not bear sleeping in your bed without one of your toys?”

She knows. Of course she knows, of course she took the bunny. This was a test, and Puppy failed. She’s going right back in the basement, Master’s going to cut her other ear off or burn her with acid-

“You’re okay.” Master releases her harsh grip on Puppy’s hair and starts combing her fingers through it. “You’re okay, you’re not in trouble. I’m happy with you, yeah? Let’s get this cleaned up.”

Master starts putting clothes back in drawers, and drawers back in the dresser. Puppy puts her sheets back on her bed. She wants her bunny.

“There we go.” Master sits on the bed and pats it. “Come here.”

Puppy obeys, and Master wraps her arms around Puppy’s neck. Puppy tenses, but… she can still breathe. She’s not being hurt. Master nuzzles into the crook of her neck.

“Mine.” She whispers. “My Puppy, my pet, my toy. Mine.”

Puppy nods. She’s starting to understand, now. Master is in one of her possessive moods. If Puppy had to guess, she’d say Master misses Bunny.

Puppy likes it when Master is like this. She’ll probably hand feed her and dress her up and do her hair and hold her, and all Puppy will have to do to keep her happy is sit still and be quiet. It’ll be a nice day.

Well, it’ll be a nice day for her. Maybe she can convince Master to let Kitty come back upstairs.

Master ends the hug, but stays cuddled up against Puppy’s side. She traces the brand on her arm, over and over. Puppet, puppet, puppet. Would now be a good time to try and help Kitty, or should she wait? What if she ruins the good mood, and wishes she’d enjoyed it for a while first? What if the good mood only lasts a few more minutes, and she won’t have any chance to ask?

“What are you thinking, sweetheart? Speak.”

Well. That helps. “Master. Why did you let me upstairs, and not Kitty? We did the same bad thing. And I should know better, but you know how Kitty is.”

Master chuckles. “Do you want to go back in the basement, love?”

It’s a threat, but Puppy doesn’t waver. “Whatever you think is best, Master. I’m just confused.” It’s not a lie. Usually, it would be her receiving the harsher punishment for something they both did.

“Aww. Poor confused Puppy. Kitty’s still downstairs because I want them to be downstairs, and they’re mine, and I can do whatever I want to them.”

“Of course, Master.” Puppy takes a deep breath. “I was only wondering- would you accept a trade? Could I take their place?”

“You’d rather be being tortured than cuddling with me? I didn’t think you were still that repulsed by me.”

Puppy shakes her head frantically. “I just want Kitty to be okay. I’d rather be tortured than know Kitty is being tortured, you know that. You use it against me all the time, I know you know that. Of course I want cuddle with you. I want to please you, I want you to be happy with me.”

Master hums contentedly. “I am. No more talking. You and Kitty won’t be trading places.”

Puppy nods, noting the phrasing. There won’t be a trade. That doesn’t mean Kitty won’t be let upstairs.

Master rests her head on Puppy’s shoulder. Puppet, puppet, puppet. Master combs her other hand through her hair, stopping when she hits the bandage over where Master cut off her ear.

“You’ll still be able to hear out of it. It will be quieter, and harder to judge location of sound, but you’ll be able to hear.”

Puppy nods. That’s what she figured. It will be a change, but she can handle that. She always does.

“Pretty Puppy, sweet Puppy. Mine.”

Puppet, puppet, puppet. Master kisses Puppy’s cheek.

“I’m so tired…”

Master traces Puppy’s scars and plays with her hair for a long time. Puppy slowly relaxes into the touch. Master isn’t upset. Master is happy with her.

She doesn’t dare relax fully, of course. Master hurts her even when she’s happy with her, and Puppy knows that if Master simply had the whim to tug on her hair, or pinch her, or even cut her open, she would.

Still, she lets herself enjoy the gentle touch. Bunny isn’t going to be around for a while, and Kitty doesn’t like cuddling, so this is the best she’s going to get for a while.

There is blissful silence for a while, and your headache starts to feel a bit better. You managed to catch it before it got truly agonizing, which is a major relief.

“…Did you not sleep well?” Diya suddenly asks. You suppress the urge to groan.

“I just have a headache. I… get them a lot.”

“Oh!” Diya starts whispering. “What can I do to help? We have pain meds, you don’t have to just suffer through it. Is that why you covered your head? Do you want me to turn off the lights?”

“I… I broke your fingers.” This should’ve come up sooner. Why does your brain always feel like it’s made of cloth? Stupid Bunny. You did this to yourself.

“You did. Do you want me to turn off the lights? Do you want pain medication?”

“Why are you so nice to me?” You keep your voice soft, but it still feels like a stab to the head.

Diya is quiet for a moment.

“I’m a nice person.” Ey finally says. “Like Barron and Greg. I like to protect people, like to make them feel happy and safe. And I know you didn’t want to hurt me. I think you’re a nice person too. I think you fit with us very nicely. Do you want me to turn off the lights?”

“…Yes, please.”

There’s the sound of footsteps, and a soft click, and then it’s dark beneath your blanket.

“Do you want some pain killers?”

Even when you had access to pain medication, it was very inconsistent whether or not it would actually make the headaches hurt less. Still, you whisper, “Yes, please.”

Footsteps leave the room. You enjoy the silence and focus on your breathing.

Footsteps reenter the room. “Can you take the blanket off for a second?”

You sit up and let the blanket slide off your face. Diya hands you a glass of water and two round pills.

You know it’s a bad idea to trust this, but it doesn’t matter. It’s not like you can leave. You take the pills and pull the blanket back over your head.

“Let me know if you need anything else, alright?”

You hum affirmatively. You hear Diya sit back down.

“Do you… Why do you think you get headaches often? Like, what do you think is the reason? Because Barron’s been working on healing magic, and maybe… maybe it could fix it.”

This could be fixable? You don’t have to deal with it your whole life?

Whatever barrier was stopping you from talking about it vanishes. “I tripped.” You whisper. “She hit my head so many times, slammed it against things, but I only started getting these headaches after I tripped and hit my head. I was stupid, so stupid.”

Diya is quiet for a long time. You wonder if they left without you noticing. “You’re not stupid.” Ey finally settles on. “Thanks for telling me. I’ll talk to Barron.”

You hope it’s fixable. You want to be like you were before, when your brain was made of what brains are supposed to be made of and not buried under layers of fog, when you could focus without pain. You don’t want to be stupid.

You sigh. Maybe you can sleep through the worst of the pain.

Eventually, Master gets bored. “Let’s get some breakfast.” She mumbles, teleporting away. Puppy walks to the kitchen, because she can’t teleport.

Master pours a bowl of cereal. “Sit, Puppy.”

Puppy plops to the ground.

Master laughs. “In a chair, Puppy.”

Puppy gets up and sits in a chair at the table. Master appears next to her, with the bowl and a spoon in her hands. She gets a spoonful of cereal and brings it to Puppy’s mouth, but Puppy doesn’t open it.

“What are you- oh, right. You have permission to eat.”

Puppy lets Master feed her. It’s funny, how something that used to be so humiliating now feels safe. At least she’s not being starved. At least she’s not being beaten.

After breakfast, Master dresses Puppy up. She puts her in a nice dress and paints her nails and does her hair and makeup, talking aimlessly the whole time.

“Have I told you the story of when I raised someone? Took her as a baby and kept her until she died. Sweet thing, smart thing, there are benefits to being raised by someone who knows as much as I do. If I’d let her go outside, she could’ve really changed the world. Cured cancer or something.

“It wasn’t as fun as this, though. I prefer breaking people down. There’s nothing to break when you don’t know anything else. I should’ve started all sweet and then pulled the rug out from under her, but I didn’t. She didn’t know things could be better, not really. Even though she knew we weren’t normal, she’d never lived in any other way. It was interesting, definitely, how she dealt with being raised by me. I’ll probably do it again, I want to see what the similarities and differences to her would be with someone different. Maybe when I’m done with you three… Hey, do you want to guess how many wars I’ve started?”

When you wake up, you headache does feel better. You take the blanket off your head. “Wait, do you still not have a pillow? I’ll be right back.”

Diya leads the room and comes back with two pillows, which ey tosses at you. You pick them up and set them next to you.

“Are you feeling better?”

You nod.

“Good! Barron’s back from work, so now is a good time to talk about chores. Let’s go talk at the table.”

You get up and follow Diya to the kitchen, where Barron and Greg are already sitting at the table. Have they been waiting for you? Barron has its notebook. You sit down.

Over the next hour, the four of you discuss chores. You tell them that you’re fine with anything, and while they don’t believe you at first, they eventually give you the chores none of them like. You’re in charge of cleaning windows and taking out trash, as well as doing your own laundry, which makes sense. Barron shows you the clothes it got you and finds a box to keep them in.

It’s a lot less than you expected, but everyone takes care of their own rooms, and they all seem pretty determined to keep the chores that they like in the kitchen, bathroom, and living room. You think it’s weird, but they seem happy with it.

Barron has less chores than the others. You guess it makes sense, since it has work and the others don’t. It puts a bad taste a bad taste in your mouth anyway.

You also figure out, around the third time that Diya says “our room” that Diya and Greg share a room, while Barron has its own. That’s… interesting. This group is fairly strange, so you don’t want to make any assumptions about why that is. You’ll ask later.

After the meeting, Barron pulls you aside. This is it. This is where reality will hit, where you’ll learn what the catch is. You try not to visibly freak out.

“Diya told me you were wondering about if I could heal- well, what sounds like some brain damage. I hope it’s okay that ey told me that. I wanted to let you know that I probably can’t. Even if I was very good at healing magic, which I’m not, healing magic only speeds up the body’s natural healing. If it’s something more permanent, healing magic won’t do much.”

You nod, still terrified.

“Do you want me to try anyway?”

You shake your head. You don’t want to be alone with Barron, it has magic, it’s the one who took Diya and Greg in, it’s the one who has all the power here. It would be so easy for Barron to hurt you.

Barron nods. “Glad that’s settled. We’ll start making dinner in a bit. Feel free to do whatever.”

Barron walks off. It’s… fine. You’re fine. It didn’t hurt you. You’re fine.

When Puppy is dressed up to Master’s satisfaction, she sits her down on the couch, turns on an extremely gory movie, and cuddles with her again. Puppy sits still and stays quiet, and Master is happy with her.

The movie ends far too quickly. Master is going to get bored, she’s going to want to hurt her, she’s going to hurt Kitty-

“You’ve been so good today. You’re always so good. Why don’t you go take care of Kitty? I’ll come and unchain them in a minute, but I’m sure they’d rather you be the first thing they see after deprivation.”

Puppy waits for Master to start laughing, to reveal she’s just messing with her. Puppy hasn’t done anything to earn a reward, and neither has Kitty. Even if Master planned on releasing Kitty today, there’s no reason she should let Puppy make the transition more comfortable. But Master doesn’t laugh.

Puppy stands up, slowly, hesitantly, and Master doesn’t stop her. She walks towards the basement, and Master doesn’t stop her. She’s being serious.

Puppy rushes down the stairs. Kitty shouldn’t have to deal with this a second longer than they have to. She taps their cheek twice and starts ripping off the duct tape, knowing that’s what they’d prefer.

Kitty cries and cries, too hard to open their eyes even after the blindfold is removed. “Puppy, Puppy. I’m sorry, if I’d have grabbed him neither of us would’ve been punished. I’m so sorry.”

Puppy rolls her eyes, which she thinks would communicate her feelings on the subject very clearly if Kitty wasn’t sobbing hysterically. She knows that it’s not true. Maybe the punishment would’ve been lighter, if she’d been able to convince Master that she was distracting the others in order to let Kitty grab Bunny. But there still would’ve been a punishment, because she let her emotions get in the way of doing what she knew Master would want.

Kitty, still restrained, tries to lean on Puppy, so she moves closer. They rest their head on her shoulder. Puppy knows it’s not a comfortable position, knows the way every sob sends agony through their shoulders. She knows it very well. She wants Master to unchain them and then leave them alone so that she can take care of them. Feed them and bathe them and massage the pain out of their shoulders, if they’ll let her.

Maybe Master will let her talk, and she can comfort them and read to them. That would be nice.

The acid burns on their torso need attending to. Puppy reluctantly moves away to find a first aid kit.

“Don’t leave, don’t leave, Puppy! I need you! I need you, please!”

Puppy doesn’t let the desperation in their voice reach her. She can’t. She needs to take care of their wounds and then go upstairs and get some food for them, if Master still hasn’t unlocked the chains, and that will make them feel so much better than her touch ever could. She knows how to take care of them, knows what they need. And if they’d take a deep breath for a moment, they’d realize she’s still in the basement.

Puppy finds some equipment and returns. Kitty cries with relief (well, probably). She gives them another two taps and cares for the burns, hoping the treatment for acid burns is similar enough to normal burns that she’s not making things worse.

Kitty pants and tries to lie on Puppy’s shoulder again. Puppy sighs and pauses for a moment to wipe tears from their face and comb fingers through their hair. They want physical affection so rarely, but sensory deprivation seems to get their wires crossed. It always takes a while for them to get back to themself afterwards.

Puppy hums gently and focuses back on the burns. Just as she’s finishing up, Kitty makes an agonized sound. She flinches, worried that she hurt them, but then she sees Master and relaxes. Master unlocks the chains and takes the IV out of their arm.

“Aw, don’t cry, Kitty. Let’s get you something to eat.”

Master digs her fingers into Kitty’s shoulders They scream but don’t pull away, making Master laugh. She wraps their collar around their neck and drags them up the stairs. Puppy follows like a good pet.

Master pours another bowl of cereal. “Open your mouth, little Kitty.”

Kitty’s face gains a red tint. They open their mouth, but only slightly. Not enough for Master to feed them without forcing their mouth further open. A small, dangerous show of defiance. Puppy wishes she was allowed to talk, wishes she could tell them to just obey, at least they’re being fed, at least Master isn’t hurting them. But she can’t.

“Kitty.” Master warns. If Master wasn’t in such a good mood, she’d have dragged them right back down to the basement. Kitty opens their mouth wider.

Master feeds Kitty as tears stream down their face. Puppy tries to be empathetic. It’s embarrassing, it’s a vulnerability with someone who could hurt them at any moment. It makes sense that they wouldn’t want it.

Puppy forces down a small seed of frustration. She wants to be fed. She wants Master to coo at her and tell her she’s doing a good job, and Kitty is acting like it’s torture. But it’s fine. It makes sense that they would feel that way. She felt that way, once. She has no reason to be frustrated.

When the bowl is near empty, Master pushes it up to Kitty’s face.

“Lick it clean, Kitty-cat.”

Kitty obeys.

“No snarky comment? You’re so much nicer after sensory deprivation. I love it when you’re like this.”

The bowl vanishes, and Master grabs Kitty’s hair, dragging them to the couch.

“You too, Puppy. We’re all going to snuggle and watch a movie, doesn’t that sound nice?”

Puppy nods and sits on the couch next to Master. Master snuggles into her side and pulls Kitty’s head into her lap. She strokes their face, plays with their hair, rubs their shoulders.

“You’re fine, Kitty, calm down. Be a good pet for Master. Relax.”

Kitty stays tense. Master sighs.

“We can do this as long as we need to. What movie you want to watch?”

Kitty makes a whimpering sound.

“Fine, I’ll pick.”

How many times has Puppy daydreamed of scenarios like this? The three of them, lying comfortably on the couch, watching a nice movie. But the details aren’t right. There’s Master instead of Liam, and Charlie is scared, and the movie is awful.

And yet, and yet. This is the best it gets. Master in a good mood, soft touches, a chance to rest a little. Things will never, ever get better than this ever again. This is the best it gets.

A/N: Let me know if I should tag anything else!

Tag list: @eatyourdamnpears @whump-in-the-closet @scp-1296 @fuzzybucketz

#whump #whump writing #whumpblr #intimate whumper #creepy whumper #nonhuman whumper #multiple whumpees #pet whump #whumpee #whumper #caretaker #2nd person pov #3rd person pov #jane’s pets #sensory deprivation tw #disscussion of torture tw

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wearejor · 2 years ago

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Hi. So the protest worked. Do you want help? I can't restore it, but I can find, and send you links to art tutorials. If you don't want to that's alright. I'm shure after a time the x-s will disapear from the system and let's hope that when that time happands, tech bros/AI bros will learn a lessen (I don't say that you are one, just I hope they stop saying "get a really job" to artists). Sorry if I sound rude, or stupid. I hope the best for you.

LOL

The protest didn't work. This was a very obvious joke.

The whole purpose of my post was to poke fun at the people who think the protest will be effective in any way.

The idea that it would have any effect on the results that AI image generators produce comes from a deep misunderstanding of how the software works and how its training data is used and implemented.

Your response and condescending attitude towards "AI bros" from a perspective fueled by misinformation makes a great example of you for all of those who try to shame artists for the tools that they use. It is rude, and while you wish me the best, the side you take in this debate enables the spread of misinformation and causes people like myself to be harassed. I've not seen a single AI artist telling anyone to get a real job. If they are, perhaps it's a response to received nastiness. Frankly, it's exhausting.

So my advice would be not to judge people before you understand them or what they do and how their tools work.

By the way, I was a traditional artist long before using AI to assist my artistic process. Most AI art creators were.

#ai artwork #ai art #ai art generator #ai generated #ai image #aiartist #generative ai #ai art community #ai art discourse #ai art debate #ai art discussion #look at these fools

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gtzel · 1 year ago

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Chapter 4: escape…almost (the borrower)

As Oliver's eyes adjusted to the light, he realized he was in a small glass jar with a lid. He tried to move, but found that he was stuck in the jar with no way out. Fear gripped him as he realized he was trapped, and he started to hyperventilate.

Suddenly, he heard a voice that sounded familiar. It was his host, speaking softly to him. Oliver recognized the voice and tried to calm down. He closed his eyes and focused on his breathing, trying to slow it down.

As he calmed down, he began to listen to what the human was saying. "I'm sorry I scared you, little guy," the host said. "I didn't mean to frighten you."

Oliver opened his eyes and looked up at the human. He saw that the teen had a gentle smile on his face and was looking at him with a mix of curiosity and concern.

"are you going to hurt me?" Oliver asked hesitantly.

"No, I promise I won't hurt you," the host replied. "I just want to understand what you are and how you got here."

Oliver felt a glimmer of hope. Maybe he could explain his situation to the human and find a way out of this mess. He took a deep breath and tried to collect his thoughts. 'can I trust a human? he seems nice enough, but he also put me in a jar' he thought for a few minuets, until the human spoke again.

"so, what's your name?" he asked casually.

"O-Oliver" he said shakily

"That's a cool name, mine is Isaac" the teen said with a smile.

"S-so um...do you think you could let me out now" Oliver asked, internally praying the giant would say yes.

"Will you promise to stay and tell if I do?" Issac said in an ever so slightly condescending tone.

Oliver considered his options. He could either say no and risk the wrath of the giant, or he could say yes and have a chance for escape.

"I-I suppose..." he said drifting off. As soon as he had said the words, he immediately regretted it, the giant abruptly reached into the jar trying to fish him out. As soon as he had seen the hand coming, Oliver pushed himself as far away as he could from it. Unfortunately though, Isaac was too quick, and caught Oliver by the shirt.

The borrower was then lifted through the air. The whole room spun around him as he was held by his shirt and placed onto the humans desk. As soon as his feet hit the wood, Oliver bolted for the nearest hiding place, which so happened to be the nearby pencil case. Oliver sat behind the large bag, shaking like a leaf, and holding his legs close to him.

"Wha-Oliver, why did you run?" Issac said, in a soft yet booming voice. His size caused a large gust of hot air to blow onto Oliver, causing him to shiver more violently. "Please come out, I didn't mean to startle you."

Though the tiny boy did not know it, Issac could see Oliver perfectly well without him coming out, but he would still give Oliver the choice. The human continued to plead to Oliver, but the borrower was in the midst of one of his 'attacks'.

Oliver was scared, more then he had ever been in his entire life. He had been caught, and when the human had been kind, he had run and very likely angered the human. Now he was hiding in a rather obvious place, but Oliver didn't want to move. Issac continued to talk but Oliver couldn't hear over the sounds of his pulse slamming against his eardrums.

"*sigh* fine, if you don't want to come out, I wont force you." The human said in a sad and quite frankly defeated tone. These words, Oliver did manage to hear, and they surprised him greatly. 'What is this guy trying to pull? Couldn't he just kill me if he wanted to? Why make me wait' Oliver thought to himself but was interrupted by the sound of the human leaving the room.

WOW! 731 words (not counting this) quite the long chapter. So what do you think will happen to Oliver? Any hypothesis on what will happen next? Vote and Comment <3

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#giant and tiny #gianttiny #giant/tiny #giant tiny #giant #gentle giant swag #gt #gt art #gt fluff #gt community

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rosycheekies · 2 years ago

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i liked it (the oshi no ko manga) mostly bc of the behind-the-scenes of x industry stuff that takes up alot of the plot

omggggg hiiiii <3333333 my #1 responder to my hater posts <333333. ilyyyyyyyy . i'm also reading the manga! sorry if this is a lil late, i had something else written up. but i had a really good nap and found what i wrote to be out of subject. very barf.

anyways, thanks for bringing up the plot! i wasn't sure where to start but discussing oshi no ko's plot, or lack thereof, is key to pointing out its flaws. there is little to no plot development. we are given an introduction to the plot: aquamarine enters the entertainment world with the intention of finding who his father is and the person/people responsible for his mother's death. plot is what the story is about. insight into the industry is putting up a setting. it describes the circumstances in which the characters are in whether it's the physical place or the social environment. this insight is used as filler: a problem/circumstance in the industry is exposed, one of the series's too many minor/supporting characters has a little interaction with it and then it is dropped. it feels awkward and stunted, most of all it feels like the author took up pages that they could have used to develop some progress into the plot for some (not) fun facts about being celebrity. it's cheap and dragging when it's obvious that the author is stretching what could have been a 50 chapter series into a hundred chapter one. so while the behind-the-scenes of x industry stuff doesn't take up plot, it does take up narrative.

it sounds super condescending to add an example, but writing it out to myself helps me understand it better too. let's say i'm writing a story about a human falling in love with a vampire (plot). any description about the vampire society is supposed to help the reader better understand the circumstances in which the characters find each other (setting).

#cheekies.txt

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icedille · 12 days ago

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@0-k-4 this is getting way too long so i'm putting it in a reblog under the cut bc it's. i'm insane sorry. also quick disclaimer this is maybe a bit of a harsh rant bc i really felt like this movie was treating me like an idiot so i'm just a little bit annoyed but i don't think anyone is dumb or wrong if they liked it or thought it was good. honestly i'm not even sure it's objectively bad rn i just. really really did not enjoy it. and most of my complaints are about stuff that i can see were intentional choices it's just that i don't respect most of these god bless. ANYWAY

my problem with the repetition is that it's on literally every level. the scenes themselves are unending and just doubling tripling every action or sequence when it really doesn't need to be every single time. and when you think it's done there's another one just restating the main point right after. and everything is just insisting on shit i already got like the few lines of dialogue are mostly spent restating things the completely unsubtle symbolism already told us same goes for the sound design the way it's shot EVERYTHING for example that one scene in the end where she reinjects the substance in herself and there's the line "please give me a better version of myself" which was. so unnecessary to me like i get what she's doing i get the point of this substance and why she's using it and we've heard that so many times already you don't have to spell it out like that!!! there's nothing more to this line than just restating the point!! i'm not fucking stupid just have some faith in having a scene speak for itself for once!!!!! and i can enjoy not so subtle things sometimes sometimes it's good and interesting to be on the nose but for me it really didn't feel like the themes or commentary or whatever were expanded at all outside of. plainly stating them once and then just repeating them for the entire runtime. it just constantly felt like the movie was hitting me over the head with the same shit over and over again asking did you get it? did you get the point about beauty standards and body dysmorphia and female self-hatred? the point mostly being that those are things that exist did you get that did you get that we're talking about that. also did you get how hot sue is bc if not here's another shot of her ass.

and i GET that the ass shots are there for a reason but i just don't think it was executed well sorry like the point about her repeating the same cycle of social pressure does not work very well considering how she doesn't have any interactions with female characters ever (i'll come back to this later). and it just undermines scenes that could have been way stronger like the part where she dreams (?) that a chicken leg pops up in her butt and the whole crew goes to look at the camera that was zoomed in on her ass to see if they find anything strange. and the sequence of all these men very seriously investigating a close-up of her body and going over it in slow-mo was very much supposed to be extremely uncomfortable and make it obvious just how much she's being treated like an object to be ogled but. the movie was already doing that for the past twenty minutes so personally it just didn't really hit like. who cares. they're looking at her ass ok bitch me too bc you the director put a camera there for five minutes straight right before this. again i don't think that's completely unintentional i could see that it's because you're also supposed to re-examine how her new perfect life was presented until then and interrogate your position as the audience or whatever (though i do always find that a little annoying considering that i. don't have any say in that like oooughg isn't it fucked up to sexualize the women on tv well sure but i'm not the one with the camera and editing software here.) but idk to me it's just. TOO insistent on that spends way too long just repeating it over and over again and it just ended up feeling condescending to me. and that's just to exemplify that phenomenon basically every little isolated point was like that for me just so repetitive and felt like i was being talked down to constantly. idk it pissed me off

also and that's more personal preference but i didn't like how. individualized? everything felt from a narrative standpoint. like the fact that elisabeth/sue doesn't have any interactions outside of the men who either desire or exploit her and even those are super underdeveloped. so everything she goes through feels very internalized and mostly coming from herself and. sure there's the catalyst of losing her job and overhearing what the guy says but that's really it once she comes back as sue she's unconditionally seen as perfect and that just goes on for the rest of the runtime there's not really any consistent pressure or pushback that could explain how you get to the point elizabeth got to. like again i know the extreme contrast is the point but i just don't think presenting something like this as "one day you're young and pretty and nobody says anything to you ever and the next you're 50 and basically everything's over just like that" is. the most interesting route. idk i believe in gradual shifts i think that kind of immense pressure makes itself known at more points in your career including the very beginning like being told she should smile once in a while is not. the worst it gets even when you're at the height of fame!! there's just not enough external factors for meeee and the way sue gets everything handed to her (+ as an example the scene where her neighbor comes over to complain abt the noise and then immediately walks back on it when he sees she's hot) felt really reminiscent of the whole belief misogynists have that being a young pretty woman is the easiest way to live life. and i guess it could be satire of that very idea but idkk it did not feel like the movie was really deconstructing that in any way since the very destructive consequences she gets at the end are really just because of her own actions and choices. and again i get that part of the point is about self-hatred and your own body image (+ i heard some pretty interesting stuff about this aspect so i could admit at least there's Something there) so it's normal if she's mostly doing shit on her own but idk it's just not a direction i enjoy a lot with smth that presents itself as social commentary like ok girl but where's the "social". i don't think it's bad necessarily to focus on personal responsability bc in the end it is true that she chose to do that but i just wish there was. more. about the context or whatever. more nuance and variety in characterization especially of the audience especially especially of her boss the crew all the industry stand-ins they're all such. cartoonish caricatures that for me it makes most of the criticism feel really weak and secondary to the rest that's essentially "elizabeth gets really old and gross bc her hotter self exploits her to stay rich and famous". like the plastic surgery angle is really mostly focused on how SHE's fucking up her body and never really adresses the entire industry behind that that has a very concrete financial motive to keep women insecure and make it so that having some kind of procedure done really early on is currently a hollywood standard (like you genuinely do not get anywhere without that rn. more or less everyone you see on screen has had smth done) and yeah women do participate in that in the sense that they're not literally coerced to do it but it's still. i just don't think focusing your criticism mostly on the individual really gets us anywhere! (and again the "she's perpetuating the same beauty standards bc she's currently profiting off of it" point falls flat for me bc of the lack of other female characters. i think that to really make a point about that kind of influences and interactions and projections of an ideal you need to compare and contrast at least a little bit.) especially if your movie is TWO HOURS AND A HALF you can afford to spend a little more time on different things!!!!

bc for me that lack of. well everything else ended up presenting the issue of getting plastic surgery or other "artificial" ways of modifying your body to fit strict beauty standards as mainly "if you do it too much you'll end up even uglier in the long run" which is not. a take i think is. good? and again i could see that they're trying to satirize this exact thing at least a little bit (i actually think the ending works pretty well in that regard like everyone freaking out and calling her a monster is on some points a really good representation of how people do turn on celebrities who've had things done once they're old and it gets more noticeable, the whole focus on "botched surgeries" etc that's a very real and common reaction. but again i didn't think it was executed very well bc it tries to do both that AND the moment where she gets through and is acclaimed with the fucking poster on her face for me the point once again got really muddied and it's just. a shame!!!!) but when the main horror of the movie IS how monstrous she gets in the end and how unnaturally old elizabeth gets throughout it, for me it's just. a little bit hard to really distinguish between satire and just perpetuating the very same thing. like in the end it's the same problem i had with x, how meaningful can your commentary on ageism in the entertainment industry/society in general and the lengths we go to to avoid looking visibly old really be when the aged features of your character are one of the main sources of your horror and are constantly presented as gross and scary and horrifying? tbh i don't think there's a fixed answer to that, like maybe that's just a personal hang-up i have here and i can accept that other people would think this works well but for me it was too much. straightforward hagsploitation to really make the "it's fucked up that old women get discarded like that" sound entirely sincere instead it mostly felt like "it's fucked up that 50 yo demi moore who's still super fit and hot got put under so much pressure that she ended up ACTUALLY old and gross". aynway. i don't know. maybe it just wasn't for me maybe it's really good and i just fundamentally disagreed with the angle it used to get at most things. i still think it was annoyingly condescending and that the pacing was terrible and ruined a lot of things tho <3

ok i'm FINALLY done. quick first impressions on the substance bc i need to rethink some stuff but: the actual horror was great loved the concept loved the designs loved the horrible horrible things and the general metaphor is good on paper. everything else about this movie is dumb as shit it did not work for me at ALL

#if you read all that i'm genuinely sorry but also thank you it's driving me insane a little bit.#i'm considering putting together a more uh. coherent review on letterboxd or whatever. idk if it'll be any shorter but less of a #stream-of-consciousness rant #idk. i've only been using it to keep track of things so far and that's better for the brain i know that but i. i can't take this anymore #i'm glad others have fun but you're all liking this A LITTLE BIT TOO MUCH FOR ME #and i need to spew my hate. even if i'm alone on this hill

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mizunetzu · 4 years ago

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ok ok so my request 👉🏻👈🏻

it’s the most obvious thing but i have a full crush on bakugou, so can you please write about him x male reader, where the reader is like.. having nightmares or almost doesn’t sleep because of his quirk (idk like maybe he can hear something special or predict anything bad, doesn’t really matter) but feels safe around bakugou so he always falls asleep around him or even oN him and katsuki is like “😡(❤️)shit whatever” and the reader is kinda shy about that but totally ok with their friends being like “wow bro that’s kinda gay :> ” because he is comfortable with “oh that’s because i aM the gay✌🏻” and his classmates love him and everything and would never mock.. but one time someone from another class was really really rude bcs of that or said that katsuki hates it so the reader starts to avoid bakugou and bakugou geTS MAD about it because reader is just his and no one else’s >:0 maybe a little confession from him in the end, maybe some.. *gay coughing* angy k*ss from him

please make it angsty but with a fluffy ending please please and thank you very much in advance💙 sorry if it’s too big i can’t explain my thoughts properly thaha

Bruh I just realized how long this request is 💀💀 also look at me, writing it like decades after you requested it 😭 pls enjoy I’m actually quite proud of it (also isn’t that gif perfect hahah get it bc the prompt was abt like sleeping and bakugou’s sleeping and-yeah I’ll let u read now)

——————

Bakugou x reader - Angry Insomniacs

⚠️Warnings - mild arguing, it’s not that bad

Pronouns - male, he/him

——————

“Why are you always fuckin’ sleeping on me?”

It first started during the Sports Festival. The chicken race and cavalry battle really took a toll on (Y/n), and he was suffering harsh quirk drawbacks. That, being drowsiness.

Somewhere on the stands, (y/n’s) eyes grew heavier and heavier until he realized he had fallen asleep. He also didn’t realized until he woke up that no one disturbed him when he was near Bakugou. Be it fear, or just plain respect, (Y/n) seemed to get the best rest when he was with Bakugou. Not even Iida dared to wake him up when he dosed off on Bakugous shoulder.

He always made it a point to be in Bakugous vicinity when ever he could, taking naps with his head buried in his arms next to Bakugou at lunch, or having his head resting on his shoulder in the dorms.

“Oi! Don’t drift off on me!”

“Mm? Sorry, Bakugou.”

(Y/n) rubbed his eyes as he weakly pushed off the common room couch, stretching and yawning as he did so. “Can I sleep in your room tonight?”

“N-no, dumbass! Fuck kinda question is that, shit-for-brains?!”

“I’ll see you there later then, Bakugou.” (Y/n) gave a slight nod, Bakugou practically foaming at the mouth already, before trotting off the continue his nap in his own room.

Before heading to his room though, he walked into the kitchen to grab a post-nap time snack. Tsuyu, who was already digging in the fridge, stepped back so (Y/n) could grab whatever he wanted.

Tsu eyed (Y/n’s) slightly tousled hair. “Did you take another nap on bakugou-chan? Kero.”

(Y/n) hummed out a “yes.” Tsu hummed back in acknowledgment. Kaminari and Kirishima, unintentionally, started listening in from their place in the kitchen after hearing Bakugou being mentioned.

Tsuyu put a finger to her lip. “Ne, (Y/n)-chan, why do you always take naps on Bakugou-chan? It’s always him, kero, and you go out of your way to make sure it’s only him.”

“Why?” (Y/n) pulled off the carton of milk stubbornly hanging on to the fridge. “Because I like Bakugou. Duh. And I sleep better near people I like.

Kaminari gasped comically while Kirishima sputtered and choked on his words. Not just listening anymore, Kaminari but in. “L-like? Like, ‘like’-like?!”

Kaminari and Kirishima joined Tsuyu and (Y/n) near the fridge. (Y/n) nodded out an “mm-hm.”, whilst grabbing a cup from the cabinet.

“So you’re like...” Kirishima made wild, indecipherable, gestures with his hand. Eventually, after realizing no one was taking the hint, brought his voice down to a whisper.

“...like...gay..?”

“Yeah. Pretty much.”

“Why didn’t you ever tell us?!” Kaminari grasped at his blond hair. (Y/n) thought for a moment, poured himself a glass of milk, and shrugged.

“I don’t know. You never asked.”

“And you’re so comfortable just telling us now? Why, kero-kero?”

“Because I’m gay as fuuuuuck.” (Y/n) took a swig of milk like it was a shot of whiskey. “And it’s not like it was a secret or anything.”

“Though I don’t think Bakugou knows. He’s too angry about me sleepin’ on him all the time to actually care about me.”

(Y/n) polished off his glass of milk. He set the cup down gently into the sink. “Eh, it’s not like I actually care for what he thinks about me.”

“See ya, I’m gonna finish my nap.”

“Uh-bye”

“Bye-bye.”

“Bye, kero.”

———

(Y/n) yawned as his head lolled off of Bakugou’s shoulder. He hissed, dusting off his shoulder angrily.

“Go sleep somewhere else!”

“I’m just goin’ to the bathroom, Bakugou, I’ll be back. Keep your shoulder warm for me.”

(Y/n) weakly stood up from his chair, and sluggishly walked out of the cafeteria. Damn, his feet felt heavy. Maybe if he hurried to the bathroom, he’d get back in time to catch a few more minutes of sleep before Bakugou exploded on him or lunch ended.

(Y/n’s) shoulder accidentally caught on someone else’s, making him stumble back and rub his shoulder. Monoma tilted his chin up in a mocking fashion.

“Ara? Is that (L/n) (Y/n) from class 1-A I see?”

(Y/n) nodded, only half processing his words as he continued on his way to the bathroom. Monoma followed somewhat behind, spewing words and one-liners that went in one ear and out the other. That is, until,

“Honestly, you would’ve thought that angry blond kid would’ve told you by now”.

(Y/n’s) ear perked up. He halted to a stop, Monoma following suit and shoving his hands smugly in his pockets. “What’s this about Bakugou?”

“Oh? He really didn’t tell you, huh? That’s...” Monoma stifled a condescending snicker. “...surprising.”

(Y/n) stepped closer. “C’mon man, tell me what?”

Monoma sighed. “Well,”

“I heard that Mr. Blasty, matter-o-factly,” Monoma jabbed his pointer finger into (Y/n’s) chest. “Really, really hates it when you sleep on, or near him. Actually,”

“I think he just hates you in general.”

(Y/n) furrowed his brows. He’s lying. He’s lying. He likes him, doesn’t he? Bakugou likes him, or else he wouldn’t have lead him on for so long, right?

Because he wouldn’t let just anyone sleep on his shoulder...right?

“You’re lying.”

“Well, believe what you want, honestly,” Monoma made a show of crossing his arms dramatically. “But you should see the way he shit-talks and glares at you in you’re sleep. It’s not like he can push you off though, you’re ‘just so persistent you’ll never leave him the fuck alone’.”

(Y/n) shoved his hands in his pockets. Monoma raised his hands in defense. “His words, not mine.”

(Y/n) turned on his heel and began to speed walk to the bathroom. Monoma yelled out from his spot in the empty hallway.

“Oh? You don’t want to hear what he thinks about your little crush on him?”

(Y/n) froze. He was under the assumption that everyone but him knew, could he be wrong? He pressed his lips into a fine line, turning around as composedly as he could. Though, he couldn’t mask the fearful curiosity in his eyes.

Monoma grinned. It was an unpleasant, sarcastic grin, one that didn’t look peaceful or pleasing at all.

“Well, I doubt that there’s anything to to say at all, so does it really ma-“

“What...what does he say about me?” (Y/n’s) voice quivered. He knew he was falling into Monoma’s trap, that he was just trying to provoke him, that he was looking for any kind of reaction, but his curiosity got the best of him. It really did, because Monoma’s words stabbed spears into (Y/n’s) heart, word by word.

“Blasty thinks it’s fucking disgusting how you like him, like, as another dude. Like honestly, he thinks you take him for an idiot for thinking he actually didn’t know! And the fact you sleep so close to him know full well you want to get in his pants?! He thinks you’re a pervert! A lazy shit! A fag! Ahahaha!”

Monoma loud cackles were cut short when he suddenly slumped over. He sunk to the ground, revealing Kendo, holding one big hand up and the other to her waist. She most likely knocked Monoma out once she heard his condescending retorts from the cafeteria.

Kendo sighed, bending down the haul Monoma’s arm over her shoulder. Her heavy glare softened once she caught sight of (Y/n’s) buggy eyed face starting at the ground where Monoma was.

“Sorry...he didn’t say anything too harsh, right?” Kendo’s words were gentle, but they sounded practically inaudible to (Y/n’s) traumatized ears.

He wordlessly staggered past her, heading back into the cafeteria to grab his lunch and sit elsewhere. He supposed he wouldn’t bother Bakugou anymore. Since he’s so damn ‘persistent’, he figured he’d stop bothering him for the rest of the day.

He wished he wasn’t so curious about what Bakugou thought of him. Like people say, ignorance is bliss. He could’ve gone his whole high school career without knowing Bakugou hated his every being. How was he going to face him in class knowing every pointer glare, every scoff, every insult was genuine?

(Y/n) felt his throat tighten. For the first time in years, (L/n) (Y/n) was fully awake.

——

It was the first time in many months that (Y/n) didn’t sit in the seat next to Bakugou, napping in his presence. He’d done it every day no fail, that is until this week. Actually, this is the 6th consecutive day he didn’t take a nap at all.

(Y/n) sat placid in his assigned seat, eyes wide and trying to keep awake. He couldn’t sleep without thinking of Bakugou, and every time he did it was always him scoffing and turning his back on him.

Every few seconds, (Y/n) would jolt harshly in his seat, rocking back and forth like a drug addict in withdrawal. He stared at his desk with eyes that could kill someone, and he dug his hands into his forearms to keep himself somewhat awake.

He didn’t hear Kirishima calling his name until he snapped his fingers infront of his face. The snap rang like a gunshot, surprising (Y/n) from his trance so badly he jolted back like he got electrocuted. Kirishima raised an eyebrow.

“You...ok man...?”

(Y/n’s) dry eyes landed fixed onto Kirishima. He relaxed, and let out a breath he didn’t know he was taking. “M’fine...”

His voice cracked like it hadn’t been used for days. (Y/n) let his eyes drift back forward, hunching back over and huddling his body like he was trying to squeeze himself to death. When Kirishima gave him a skeptical glare and crossed his arms, (Y/n) let out a small “m’ just tired, that’s all...” and gave the most pathetic smile known to man.

“If you’re so tired,” Mina, rested her arms on the back of (Y/n’s) chair. “Why don’t you sleep on Bakugou like you do every morn-“

“NO! I-I can’t do that!” (Y/n) whipped his head back, gripping the back of his chair so hard his hand turned white. Mina and Kirishima flinched, noticeably caught off guard with his sudden outburst. “I...can’t...I can’t do that...”

(Y/n) suddenly looked very awake, contrasting the way he looked like he was struggling to keep his eyes open the whole time they were in class.

(Y/n’s) breath steadied as he shut his mouth awkwardly. “M’sorry...for yelling...didn’t mean to...”

(Y/n) scrubbed at his eyes. The rush of adrenaline was already wearing off. Mina set her dainty pink hand on (Y/n’s) hunched form. “Why not...?”

“I just can’t.”

(Y/n) said nothing more. He went back to his occasional jolts awake and scrubbing his heavy eyes every 2 minutes. Kirishima sighed, shaking his head towards Bakugou, before shrugging his shoulders then forming an ‘X’ with his hands.

Bakugou clicked his tongue angrily, turning and facing back forward in his seat.

——

(Y/n) was practically seeing stars by the end of hero’s class.

It was a relatively simple assignment, 1 on 1 sparring, but it caused a lot of quirk use.

He fought both his tired eyes and Midoryia, but ultimately failing due to his harsh quirk drawbacks. Midoryia barely had to break a sweat to have (Y/n) come toppling down.

(Y/n) was ushered back into the horde of students murmuring “don’t mind” and “you did great!”, but he just slithered past and stood a few feet away from them, all the way in the back of the field.

All might was explaining something (Y/n) couldn’t quite hear. Not only because he was standing so far away, but because his hearing had been considerably wonky, not to mention the hissing, ringing sound irritating his eardrums.

“Oi.”

And even if the ringing had stopped and he could hear, his brain was too tuckered out to remember anything past five seconds ago.

“Oi!”

Gosh, speaking of his brain-

“OI! SHIT-FOR-BRAINS! YOU GONNA KEEP IGNORING ME OR YOU GONNA TELL ME WHY YOU’VE BEEN AVOIDIN’ ME?!”

Bakugou set off a small explosion. The blast wasn’t nearly as loud or powerful as in combat, but to a tired mans ears, it sounded like nukes. The ringing in (Y/n’s) ears spiked, and he cupped his ears tightly.

“B-Bakugou, nows not-“

“OH, YOU TRYNA TUNE ME OUT BY COVERIN’ YOUR EARS NOW?!” Another explosion. Bakugou’s gauntlets had been out for repairs since his last hero training, so (Y/n) could clearly see the glowing red and yellow spark from his fist. The ringing spiked again. His vision burned with sparks.

(Y/n) winced, saying nothing, and brought his hands to rub at his eyes. Bakugou eyebrow twitched.

“STOP IGNORING ME!”

Bakugou brought his hand out, his gloved hand starting to glow red with his next explosion. (Y/n) couldn’t take it anymore.

He stumbled forward, and grabbed Bakugou’s wrist. He shoved it out of the way, but his hand still ignited and set off a blast that propelled them straight to the ground.

“G-get off-a me!” Bakugou tried pushing (Y/n) off with his free hand.

(Y/n) pinned Bakugou’s glowing right hand by the wrist, using his other to hold down his other shoulder. (Y/n) would’ve never done something as ballsy and stupid as this, but he was too tired, too done, too much in pain to care.

“What are you actually trying to say!? All that stupid extra yelling and petty insults, they get you fucking nowhere! Spit it out! Or does trying to intimidate every single fucking person you meet just self-satisfaction?!”

Bakugou growled. He grabbed at (Y/n’s) shoulders, pushing off of him and pinning (Y/n) to the ground in his place.

“Then what about you, huh?!” Bakugou was angrily spitting at (Y/n’s) face. “Why the fuck did you stop getting enough sleep for your quirk?! Are you just that dumb that you stay up at night?!”

“I don’t wanna hear it from a stupid fucker like you, who can’t even take care of himself!”

(Y/n) hissed. He freed his dominant hand from Bakugou’s vice grip and pushed at Bakugou’s face, grabbing a fistful of his hair. “All you ever do is shit talk! Shut up! No one thinks it’s fucking cool!”

“What the hell are you even talking about?!”

The two wrestled on the ground, angrily grabbing and tugging at each other, and rolling around on the floor. There were shouts of “get Aizawa-no, get midnight-sensei!” and “All might, stop them!”, but the two were so caught up in their fight they couldn’t hear anything.

“Can’t you ever learn to mind your fucking Business?!”

“What the fuck does that even have to do with this!”

(Y/n) flipped Bakugou over one more time. He pushed him down by the forehead, pushing his head down into the ground while Bakugou flailed and kicked from underneath him.

“SHUT UP! WHY DO YOU EVEN FUCKIN’ CARE, BAKUGOU?! WHY DO...w-why do...wh...”

A sweet, sweet smell flooded (Y/n’s) senses. It smelt relaxing, tantalizing, it smelled like sleep. It smelled like sleep. He wanted to sleep. He wanted to sleep so bad. Maybe he could just...

(Y/n) slowly sank from his spot on top of Bakugou, flopping on top of his body and going completely slack. Bakugou’s eyes widened, and he covered his nose.

Midnight strutted from above the two, waving away a few stray wisps of her mist. Bakugou hacked out a new breath, while (Y/n) laid on top of him, peacefully asleep for the first time in days.

“Well, it seems like you two already know without me saying it.” Midnight motioned over to two small robots carrying a stretcher. “I’ll just take him to recovery girl and he should wake up in-“

Bakugou pursed his lips and wrapped his arms around (Y/n’s) sleeping figure when Midnight extended her arm towards them. He tightened his arms around (Y/n).

“I’ll do it. S-since this piece of shit attacked me first and...I’ll just do it-!”

Midnight eyed him knowingly, before waving him off and mumbling something about ‘youth’.

——

(Y/n’s) eyes fluttered open. His body felt like it was broken in every way possible. It was so sore, it hurt even thinking about moving. (Y/n) laid there, with his eyes half open, contemplating whether or not he should close them again.

Would he be able to sleep, though? Even if he’d started sleeping near Bakugou as a ‘don’t-wake-me-up’ measure, it slowly stopped being just that and more a matter of he felt safe and comfortable around him. In a way, he’s become a bit dependent on him, which is probably a bad thing, but he didn’t care.

Sleeping with Bakugou felt best. But that wasn’t an option, now was it?

(Y/n) pursed his lips, an involuntary groan rumbling from his tired vocal cords. He continued staring at the blinding nurse office lights, staring until he saw spots in his vision.

“Stop doing that-do you wanna go fuckin’ blind?”

(Y/n) flinched. He hated the way that familiar, aggravated voice still stirred butterflies into his stomach. He glanced to his side, as if to make sure he wasn’t just hearing things.

He met eyes with Bakugou.

“Bout’ time you fuckin’ woke up. Been waitin’ forever, shit-for-brains.”

(Y/n) averted his eyes back up to the blinding floodlights. Bakugou scowled. “Oi! Don’t ignore m-“

“How long were you here for?”

Bakugou went silent. It was his turn to avert his eyes, albeit more angrily.

“...I was here since you fuckin’ fainted in class, idiot. I even carried your stupid body here from the dumbass carrier bots.”

(Y/n’s) eyes softened, unlike Bakugou’s, who glared at the floor just beside the chair he was sitting in. (Y/n) checked the big black clock mounted on top of Recovery Girl’s desk.

It was 6:00 pm.

If Bakugou was telling the truth, he’d been sitting there waiting for him to wake up for 4 hours straight.

“Bakugou-its been hours since class ended-you should be at the dorms by now-! Why did you-“

“Well if you told me why you suddenly started avoiding me we wouldn’t be here right now!”

(Y/n) let his mouth fall closed. Bakugou scoffed. “Well?!”

(Y/n) opened his mouth, but it clamped shut when Monoma’s words echoed in his mind. Bakugou looked at him with an expectant face.

“I can’t tell you.”

“WH-“ Bakugou sputtered angrily. “COURSE YOU CAN! THE FUCKS STOPPING YOU!”

“Nothing I-I just can’t!”

“WHY!? WHY NOT?!”

“BECAUSE I LOVE YOU!”

“OK AND?! I LOVE YOU TOO!”

“THEN WHATS THE PROBLEM HERE!” (Y/n) shouted, before he cupped his mouth in realization. Bakugou’s eyes went wide aswell. “Wait I didn’t mean that-“

“YEAH! WHATS THE FUCKIN PROBLEM HERE?!” Bakugou recovered from his initial shock, already back to yelling. (Y/n) furrowed his brows with a blush.

“Wh..wait so-“

“I LIKE YOU, YOU LIKE ME, SO WHY THE FUCK DID YOU STOP SLEEPING ON ME?!”

“Wait but...” (Y/n’s) voice was barely above a whisper. “Don’t you, y’know...not like it...when I do that-?”

“DUMBASS! WHERE’D YOU GET THAT FROM?!” It seemed like Bakugou got angrier and angrier each passing second. It was hard to tell what (Y/n) found so attractive about him.

“From...from Monoma...?”

Bakugou looked angrier than ever. (Y/n) raised an eyebrow. “YOU-I CAN’T BELIEVE-! I-! FUCK IT!”

Bakugou snarled and practically shoved his face onto (Y/n’s), angrily stealing his breath away with a kiss. The kiss, surprisingly, was soft and gentle, despite Bakugou’s previous intensity. It seemed to calm Bakugou down, and cheer (Y/n) up.

The two slowly parted for air. It was quiet for a second, something that rarely happened near Bakugou.

“I thought you hated me...”

“W-why the fuck would I hate you...dumbass.” Bakugou rested his forehead on (Y/n’s) shoulder. His spiky tufts of blond hair tickling (Y/n’s) face.

“Because Monoma said so...?”

“I’m gonna kill that bastard.” Bakugou snarled, climbing into the cot (Y/n) was in. He pushed (Y/n) back down into the pillow, pulling up the white blanket and laying down next to him. He guided (Y/n’s) head-a tad bit forcefully-to his chest. “...after we sleep.”

Bakugou shut his eyes, half irritated and half embarrassed, while (Y/n) chuckled tiredly. He nuzzled his head into Bakugou’s chest.

“Goodnight, Bakugou.”

——

Extra:

Monoma walked into class 1-B the next morning. He yawned, still a bit tired, when he ran straight into someone.

“Hey, copycat fucker.”

Monoma looked up. The class was empty, with no one but Bakugou standing infront of him.

Fuck.

Needless to say, Bakugou got another 3 days of house arrest.

——————

Bru this was so long ong

#bakugou katsuki #mha bakugou #bnha bakugou #bakugou imagine #bakugou x reader #katsuki bakugo x reader #bakugo #bakusquad #bakugou x male reader #bakugo x male reader #bakugou angst #bakugou x y/n #mha #mha fic #bnha #bnha fic #bnha x male reader #mha x male reader #mr scifijiz

2K notes · View notes

d0llpie · 4 years ago

Text

Angry confessions

Summary: You’ve tried everything to make Kyotani realise you like him but he thinks you’re joking

Kyotani x reader

Warnings: cursing

angst to fluff, mutual pining

a/n: i might make a part 2 but i’m not sure, lmk if you want one!

wc: 2.5k

Kyotani couldn’t stand you. Your annoying smile and indifferent attitude while he told you to get lost. Couldnt you take a hint? Apparently not as you continued to greet him the same warm way every time you saw him, slipping him notes during class and flirting with him. Couldnt you flirt with some other poor soul? he couldn’t handle it anymore, knowing you weren’t really flirting with him. Maybe you did flirt with others, that only made it worse, knowing it wasn’t just him who got to see your smile and teasing laugh everyday. Honestly he didn’t know which way was worse, all he knew was that he was sick of you.

It started at practise, he was used to Oikawa’s fan girls attending their practise just to ogle at the captain, that always annoyed him but he soon found you to be worse. Oikawa has tossed him a ball to spike down and you started cheering for him. He whipped his head around to see you smiling brightly down at him, waving. He was taken back, his scowl dropping for a minute as the tips of his ears turned red before he continued on with practise, trying to ignore your cheers everytime he spiked. You trailed behind him to the school date, chatting on about your day and how amazing Kyo’s spikes were while he just grunted and continued walking in front of you, trying to speed up. Every time he sped up, you did too, he wasn’t sure if you were just stupid or if you didn’t care that he was trying to get away from you but either way it confused him.

Since then you’d follow him around, having one sided conversations with the back of his head on the way to the gym, in between classes and sometimes even during lunch times when you weren’t with your friends. He wished you wouldn’t flirt so much, it was the worst part of your whole fan girl act. You’d compliment his hair, his spikes and his eyes often, it came out so naturally that it made him tense up and pause every time, trying to calm down the beating of his heart in his ears. Why couldn’t you just stick to fangirling over Oikawa? Kyotani could take you following him and talking about your day if it wasn’t for the flirting act. He even liked hearing about your day, it was cute to hear you ramble on until you decided to give him false hope with your remarks, sometimes even trying to hold his hand or rest your head on his shoulder.

It had been a few months now and you weren’t sure what to do. You were in a small cafe with your cousin Iwaizumi, opting to seek out the spiker for advice as a last resort.

“I don’t know Iwa, i’ve been flirting with him for months and coming to all your games to cheer him on and he doesn’t even look at me” you fiddling with your fork, huffing out dramatically.

“We’ll have you actually told him you like him or asked him to hang out?” you glared at his condescending tone

“I shouldn’t have to tell him! I don’t know how much more obvious i can get...plus i ask him to have lunch with me all the time” you sighed, feeling your heart sink. You’d thought that he didn’t like you, it was obvious at first that he found you irritating but overtime you thought he’d warm up. Maybe you were just being stupid, setting yourself up for heartbreak at your inevitable rejection. Still, you held on tight to the tiny bit of hope you still had.

“hey.” Iwa waved his hand in front of you, pulling you from your thoughts “I mean surely him ignoring you can’t get any worse if you actually confess right? Plus maybe i’m wrong and he does like you so you’ll actually make some progress” you hummed in agreement, though you were hesitant

“How am i supposed to confess though? He doesn’t even look at me when we talk, well, i talk..” you realised just how pathetic you sounded, how desperate. Was this how Oikawa’s fan girls felt? Ignorantly hopeful for someone who was out of reach? Well at least Oikawa spoke to his fan girls...

“Y/n...not to sound rude or anything, but why do you like this kid? He’s not exactly treating you very well..” you looked up at your cousin who was looking at you with eyes full of concern.

“Well he may not seem like the sweet type but i’ve seen him when he’s alone, he’s really cute when he doesn’t look like he’s on the warpath, plus i think he’s just shy around me and doesn’t know how to act around others, he’s sweet though, he doodles in his notebooks. Also, he’s really passionate about volleyball! i remember the first time i saw him spike, he actually smiled!” you giggled at the memory, blushing at the thought of Kyo.

“Whatever y/n, you need to confess before i do it for you.” you gasped in feign shock “You wouldn’t dare iwa-chan~” you laughed at Iwaizumi’s enraged expression “Stop hanging out with Oikawa ugh” you laughed at him, sipping on your hot chocolate you’d forgotten about.

Kyotani had woken up earlier than usual, deciding to go for a walk. While he was walking his mind drifted back to you, looking behind him half expecting you to be there talking his ear off about random things, making him blush with your flirting. It was cruel how you could flirt with him so shamelessly and not mean it. He so badly wanted you to mean it. He grunted in frustration, picking up his pace until he was running, he was running past a few shops and cafes when he saw you. You were sitting by the window as the sun hit you, his eyes widened, you truly were so pretty to him. He almost stopped running until he saw who you were looking at, Iwaizumi was there. Of course you’d be on a date with him, he was so strong and open. You deserved someone like Iwaizumi he supposed, someone who could actually talk to you, someone who was better than him. He continued running despite feeling his own heart in his throat, making it harder to breathe.

“I’m not writing him a letter Iwa.” you rolled your eyes at his suggestion, looking out the window to see a familiar head of blonde flash past in a blur. “Iwa! He just ran past” you stood up from your seat excitedly, smile crossing your face. “Wow you’re worse than i thought. Y/n, you’re a simp.” You weren’t even offended at his words “i mean can you blame me?” you sat back down, “Yes y/n, yes i can. You probably want to go after him right now” although he was joking he looked up to see you staring back at him hopefully. “Oh my god y/n, fine! Go. I’ll see you at school tomorrow. “ You got up and hugged Iwa squeeling, “Thank you thank you, if i don’t come to school tomorrow i’m either crying about being rejected or on a date with my handsome boyfriend, bye!” “Do not skip school y/n!” Iwa yelled after you as you ran out of the cafe, heading down the same path Kyo took.

As you passed by a park, you noticed Kyotani sitting under a tree, panting heavily. “Kyo!” You called out, smiling brightly as you made your way over to him, ignoring the frustrated frown on his face. “What” he gruffly replied, clearly annoyed but you were ecstatic to get a reply from him. “I actually wanted to tell you something!” It’s now or never you thought, this was a perfect time to do it, you were ready for either response, you waited for him to look up at you before continuing.

“Um, i haven’t really thought of what to say so i’m just going to say it, i like you. I was wondering if you wanted to go out with me? You don’t have to of course but i really wanted you to know” you played with your hands while you waited for him to say something, silence was not what you expected but- “are you serious right now?” he was angry?, you tilted your head to the side “of course, i’m surprised you didn’t already kn-” “What is wrong with you? First you follow me around everywhere, flirting with me and annoying the fuck out of me, now this? haven’t you played around enough? Honestly i didn’t think you’d take it this far, that’s just low y/n.” the tone in his voice was enough to have you back away a little, confusion covered your face, you definitely hadn’t anticipated this kind of response. Despite your heart sinking at the rejection, you couldn’t help but feel a little angry as well. Who was he to talk to you like that. “What the fuck are you talking about Kyo. A simple ‘Sorry i don’t feel the same’ would’ve sufficed, honestly this is the most you’ve ever said to me and it’s this?” He was taken back by your reaction. You were serious? “Why would you try confess to me while you were just on a date then huh?” you furrowed your brows in confusion before it dawned on you, he thought you were dating Iwaizumi. Now you understood more of what he was saying, you opened your mouth to speak but he interrupted you. “Yeah, I saw. You can drop the act now it was very funny. Now you can fucking leave me alone and stop acting like Oikawa’s clingy fangirls. I’ll finally stop having to hear you yapping in my fucking ear all day.” he wasn’t expecting to look up and see tears rolling down your cheeks. “Iwaizumi is my cousin..” you whispered meekly before turning back in the direction of the cafe, running home.

Kyotani sat there dumbfounded. You were serious. He just called the girl he liked annoying and clingy after she tried to confess all because he was too insecure and jumped to conclusions. “Fucking idiot.” he cursed himself out under his breath.

He didn’t know what to do, he couldn’t sleep, every time he closed his eyes he just saw that heartbroken look on your face, eyes filled with tears. Because of him. He groaned before going to his desk, he begun to write a letter. The thought of you never coming to his games anymore, you never cheering for him again, telling him about your day and that new show you start, even the flirting, he knew he couldn’t get through the day without it. You weren’t annoying, you were the only person who managed to make him stop scowling, he was relaxed around you.

You walked into your first class, finding a letter on your desk. Your eyes flitted over to Kyo who was sitting a few seats away looking away nervously, you could see how red he was from here. You tucked the letter into your bag, he didn’t deserve your attention and you were determined to not talk to him or look at him anymore. Kyotani watched you put away his letter, he frowned, you’d probably just read it later. He didn’t want to get discouraged so he waited for you during lunch but you never came. He was getting antsy, it was so quiet. After his final classes he was excited to go to practise, getting there on time for once, only you weren’t there. Instead he was met with an angry Iwaizumi “what the fuck did you do to her!” he boomed, gaining the attention of everyone in the gym. Kyotani looked down, surprising everyone “where is she?” he asked quietly, Iwaizumi quirked his brow, crossing his arms over his chest. “She’s probably at home or the cafe.” Kyotani looked up, running out of the gym ignoring Oikawa’s calls to come back and train.

You were sitting in a booth at the cafe, scrolling on your phone when you remembered the letter. You opened it despite your hesitation and began reading.

Y/n,

I used to find you irritating, i couldn’t understand why someone as pretty as you would follow me around and talk to me when i was so cold to you. I took your flirting as you either making fun of me or just you having a flirtatious personality so i would get annoyed. About yesterday, i misunderstood completely and i’m so sorry for snapping at you. I never meant to lash out on you and i never wanted to. I was fed up with the person i liked toying with me and when i found out you liked me back i didn’t believe you.

I’m sorry for hurting you, if you let me be yours i swear i’ll never hurt you again. I never want you to cry because of me ever again, i like you too y/n and i’m sorry i was too much of a pussy to tell you sooner.

I hope you forgive me

-Kyotani.

You smiled at the letter, looking up at the sound of the cafe bell ringing to see Kyotani, out of breath staring at you. You smiled up at him like usual and he returned it, moving towards you quickly. “Kyo-“ he cut you off, smashing his lips against yours, his lips were gentle despite the desperate hold he had on you, cradling your head in one hand and gripping your collar in the other. You smiled against the kiss, cupping his cheek before pulling away. “Hi” you giggled as he sat down in front of you, holding your hand on the table “Hi” he smirked at you. “Y/n, can i take you to dinner?” you nodded happily “of course you can handsome~” he blushed furiously and this time you got to see, you cupped his cheek again, leaning over to kiss his cheek softly, only making it worse. “C’mon doll” he pulled you up, holding your hand as you exited the cafe, walking side by side as he intertwined your fingers, smiling down at you with a soft expression. How was he so blind?

1K notes · View notes

odetojeons · 4 years ago

Text

No Better Canvas To Paint A Ruined Landscape — Lee Seokmin

request: hii can i request a sub!seokmin x dom fem reader?? you catch him touching himself and then he is super shy about it when you confront him!!<3

tags: soft dom and fem!reader, shy and sub!seokmin, cockring, orgasm control, light bondage, established relationship, praise kink, noona kink, semi-public sex (kind of?), snowballing, unprotected sex, blowjob, fluff at the end if you squint, seokmin being adorable, and potentially killing me with his cuteness

a/n: I’m a whore for sub seokmin. that’s all I have to say. definitely not alive after this. tbh this was my favorite tumblr smut until now all because seokmin. lee seokmin. yeah. bye.

word count: 7202

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

Seokmin looks like he might combust into a thousand tiny Seokmins really soon.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

You keep staring at him in interest, looking with an amused lifted eyebrow how his red face turns to the side to avoid your eyes like it’s some sort of plague. There’s a lonely drop of sweat running down his left temple, a hand coming to swap at it and freezing in the middle of the act when your eyes find each other, the blush creeping in his cheeks burning with an even darker shade as you watch fascinated the bob of his adam’s apple when Seokmin swallows nervously.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

He jumps a little where he’s sitting when you nudge his feet with yours. Seokmin comically widens his eyes at you when you mouth “what’s going on?”, quick to shake his head what it seems like at least fifty times. A frown forms on your brows, your boyfriend being oddly nervous and suspicious is poking on your curiosity, especially when he excuses himself to the bathroom in a hurry.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

You stare at his empty seat, the plate of food laying almost untouched on the table. It’s been a while since the both of you hosted a party on your house, so you wanted to make the experience good for your friends — and you know Seokmin does too, but for some reason he’s acting… whatever the way he’s acting —, having even put a lot of effort into dressing up for the occasion. Something must be wrong, so you excuse yourself from the friends who are sitting on the table and go through the little crowd, heading towards the bathroom.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“Seok-ah?” you ask softly where you stand right in front of the door. No answers. You knock again, this time a little bit louder. Maybe he didn’t listen to you, the music loud enough to shake you all the way to your bones. Again, no answers. Your frown worsens, gripping the handle and turning it just to be met with an empty bathroom. “Seokmin?”

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

He’s not there, and okay, there's definitely something wrong. Seokmin sometimes tends to go through stuff you have no idea about because he keeps thinking he might bother you with his problems, and you just want him to know that you love him so much that it pains you more to see him suffering in silence than hearing him talking about it. Overall, Seokmin is the biggest overthinker ever, your sweet and shy boyfriend, a ball of sunshine despite his little defects you’re so fond of.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

You go to the master bedroom, your last hope to where he must be as your house doesn’t have many rooms. Worry settles deep within your stomach thinking that Seokmin might be sick or something.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

He isn’t.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

Quite the opposite, actually. Seokmin is more than healthy.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

You were not even remotely prepared for what you find inside when you open the door of your room. Seokmin is standing in front of the old escritoire you bought from an antique store, one of his sprawled hands supporting the weight of his body on the desk and broad back dressed in a white social shirt, still turned to you as the music overlapped the sound of your arrival — everything normal at first, and you’re about to open your mouth to question if everything is alright with him when your eyes catch a movement.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

Seokmin’s arm is working on something really fast, hand going up and down, tiny, soft noises coming from him, and your mind goes blank when the realization that Seokmin is jerking off sinks deep within your core.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

There’s a shiver rocking on your body, head spinning.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“Seokmin,” is what you say, monosyllabic and completely flabbergasted.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

Seokmin snaps his head so fast in your direction you think he might have broken his neck for a second, eyes widening right before he closes them very tightly and moans loud enough that makes you want to close the door in fear of someone listening, but you’re too stuck in the fact that Seokmin almost just came to even be able to move from your spot.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“F-fuck,” he cries out, the grip he has around the base of his cock almost painful, probably there to hold his orgasm back. You’re stunt into silence as he scrambles desperately to hide his beloved friend back into his pants, struggling with the zipper in the process because the bulge is too big.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“Seokmin,” you say again, like it’s the only word that remains in your vocabulary. Your mouth goes dry, heat burning on your lower stomach when you look at the notebook in front of Seokmin and sees one of the videos you record to be his fap material when you’re not around, playing on the screen. But you are around. “What are you doing?”

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

It’s more than obvious what he’s doing. Even so, you still find yourself asking.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

Seokmin still hasn’t turned around. You know he must be very embarrassed right now — who wouldn’t anyway —, if the blush spreading all the way down to his ears and neck is anything to go by. His body stiffens when a soft moan comes from the notebook speakers, hands reaching to close the video and the screen so fast he knocks some things off of the table and into the ground.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“Turn around,” you tell him, finally finding enough strength to close the door and lock it. Seokmin flinches at the sound, shoulders tensing, but he remains unmoving. “Now.”

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

He flinches again, this time because of the finality in your tone, leaving no spaces for objections. Seokmin then complies, turning his body to you like every movement pains him deep within the bones, hands coming to cover the front of his pants and head hung low in shame.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

You take a sweet moment to admire Seokmin’s figure; his shirt is open until the third button, firm and red chest peeking out of it, sweat glistening his skin to a beautiful shade of gold, biceps looking like it would pop out of the sleeves of his social shirt and lips swollen, probably because he must have bitten them really hard. Fuck, your boyfriend is so hot.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

You lift a finger and crook it a few times towards yourself. He gets the message, coming closer lightning fast and stopping right in front of you, still refusing to look you in the eyes. You had enough of this attitude, spinning him around so his back could be against the door and cradling his chin between your fingers to tilt his head enough to look at you.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“Aren’t you going to answer?” you question with a pout, voice poisonously sweet. Seokmin’s shiver doesn’t go unnoticed by you, satisfaction licking on your lower stomach.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“I— I-I’m, I was…” Seokmin mumbles intelligibly, a moan escaping his lips when your nails sink onto his shoulder and the darkness swimming in your eyes leaves his legs weak. He can’t shiver, needs to remain composed or else he might embarrass himself further, if that’s even possible, might make you realize the reason why he’s like this, might make him—

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

Seokmin shivers.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“‘M s-sorry.” he offers, hips bucking slightly when he hears your pleased hum.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“Are you though, sunshine?” bodies pressing closer, you watch Seokmin’s arms twitch, not knowing if he’s allowed to touch you. You smile at that, biting at his lower lip. “You were so desperate to touch yourself you came here all alone and jerked off to one of my videos? You don’t seem very apologetic to me.”

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

He whines at your condescending tone, head hitting the door with a soft thud when you tilt his chin back to lick a hot stripe up his neck, pulling it to the previous position once you’re done teasing him a little. There’s a sound threatening to come out of you when you see how much want is written all over his face.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“I-it’s because you look—” Seokmin’s sentence gets cut off in the middle when he feels the feather-like trace of your fingers on his hands that were still doing a very poor job of hiding the press of his cock to his pants. It brings tiny goosebumps all over his skin, Seokmin needing to take a deep breath before proceeding. “You look s-so hot with these clothes…”

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

Your touch stills completely, and Seokmin’s heart might jump out of his thoracic cage any time soon, but even so he doesn’t stop talking.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“And, and t-the way you were dancing was just— j-just so fucking sexy,” he mumbles quietly, closing his eyes for a second like he’s remembering how you swayed your hips obscenely to the beat of the music earlier. A flash of a memory runs through your mind, Seokmin sitting on your couch, manspreading as he watches you with one of his legs moving up and down nervously. “Want to f-fuck you so bad.”

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“Yeah?” you tangle a hand on his hair, fisting it so you could pull his head backwards and pleasure yourself with the moan he gives you. Seokmin blinks at the ceiling, like he’s willing himself not to move. “My baby boy got hard watching me dance?”

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

The pet name does something to him. It always does. Seokmin bucks his hips involuntarily, the front of his hands hitting your stomach as he ruts against his palms with such a whiny mewl you could swear you feel a punch to your lower stomach.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“Yes. So hard.” and his voice, so sweet and beautiful, makes your penties start to soak. His hot breath fans your face, chest heaving with the intensity of it. “I’m so hard for you, fuck.”

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

You slap his hand away. Seokmin turns his head to look at you, eyes big like he has been caught doing something very wrong.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“Lost your manners, sunshine?” grabbing at his wrists, you pry them away to take a better look at his bulge, finding endearing how his cheeks immediately go redder at that. It looks painful, the outline of his cock pressing tight against the fabric of his blue pants, and you try not to let the smugness seep through your voice when you notice a wet patch of precum on it. “You’re that desperate you even forgot how to ask?”

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

You trap his hands behind his back; realistically, Seokmin could break free at any time he wants, with him being almost twice as bigger than you, but you know he wouldn’t do it because right now you got this kind of power over him that surrenders Seokmin putty, and it turns you on so much. He looks so good this way, back resting against the door, hips stuck to the front like he wants you to do something, eyes looking down at you with a hunger, a hunger to take what he wants already, but at the same time with an enormous amount of submission.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

And Seokmin is huge, not even just down there but in the rest of his body as well. Huge, thick thighs, huge chest, huge biceps; he is broad enough to tower over you even if the height difference wasn’t so big. And still, he chooses to give in to you.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

Everything about Lee Seokmin drives you insane.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“Please…” he says, barely above a whisper. With the door closed, it was more than enough for you to be able to listen even through the loud music going on outside. “P-please.”

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“Please what?” you press further, fingers coming back to make a hot trail on his cock. Seokmin bucks forward a little, whining when you press a thumb on the cockhead.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“Hmmm,” is all he answers, face burning with shame when he averts his eyes elsewhere. Seokmin knows very well what you want him to call you, it only happens when you’re feeling extra mean and horny, but he’s always so shy about it even if he has called you that more times than you can count.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

Adorable.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

You sigh, letting go of his cockhead and wrists to cradle his face with your hands, swallowing the frustrated cry he lets out with a kiss. Seokmin takes a few seconds to react, mind in haze with all of the electrifying horniness shocking his body, and then you feel his hands hold on your waist tight enough to leave marks. He moans, as if having your lips on his is the best reward he could ever ask for, and you yelp when Seokmin turns you both around and slams your back against the door. Seokmin kisses you rough, tongue pressing so hard on yours your head ends up hitting the door with a faint noise.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

Fisting a hand on his hair, you hold onto it tight enough to make him hiss at the slight, but pleasurable pain. Seokmin is trying to take what he wants and you’re having none of that, using the hold on him to control the pace of the kiss and tilt his head to the place where you want it to go. You suck at his bottom lip, sinking your teeth in the plump flesh just so you could soothe it later with your tongue — and do that again, and again, and again. It doesn’t take long for him to be putty with your ministrations, knees buckling under his weight until he’s kneeling on the floor. You bend down slightly as he does so, kissing his breath away.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“Look who’s getting all bold now,” you scoff when you part away, Seokmin’s eyes half lidded and swollen lips open to take big lungfuls of air. “Yeah, that’s right.”

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

You stare down at him, the sight of your taller boyfriend on the floor making something evil twist in your belly.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“Kneel for me like a good boy and I’ll let you fuck me like a bad one.”

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“Please,” Seokmin begs at that, moaning when he closes a hand around his cock. You tsk, grabbing his jaw tightly and squeezing it between your fingers. “Wanna come.”

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“Stop that before I decide to punish you,” you admonish, watching his eyes go wide for what it feels like the hundredth time this night and his hand falls uselessly on the side of his body. “Actually, you know what? Take your clothes off and lay on the bed.”

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

Seokmin blinks a few times as if processing the order, walking over to the bed with trembling legs. He looks at you for some seconds, face burning red, and starts to unbutton his social shirt. You keep watching in silence, cooing at the cuteness of your boyfriend, right before the breath is punched right out of your lungs when his toned abs come into view. No matter how many times you see his body, it never fails to make you incredibly horny — the duality between his adorable face and the rest of him leaves you speechless.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

You clear your throat when Seokmin covers his chest, embarrassed with being stared so attentively. Not your fault he’s so hot.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“Come here, sunshine,” you purr, sitting on the other side of the bed and patting on the space beside you. He nods a little as if telling himself to obey, hopping onto your side and laying on his back after he finishes taking off his shoes. “Take your pants off too.”

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

This time Seokmin complies faster. It must hurt a lot, seeing the big bulge down there, and his fingers fumble to undo the button and the zipper so fast you’re surprised he didn’t hurt himself in the process, taking his pants and boxers completely off and throwing somewhere neither of you care. Seokmin’s hard cock slaps against his belly with a soft sound, smearing precum on his lower stomach. It’s an angry shade of red for being denied for so long, the wet mushroom tip making your mouth water as his hips kick upwards with the sheer need of touching it.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

Seokmin looks at you with big, expecting eyes.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“Seems like you were so desperate you couldn’t even hold yourself back from jerking off like a horny teenager,” you start, brushing a strand of hair behind his ear. Seokmin visibly trembles when you pull away, rummaging through your nightstand’s drawer to find what he knows very well it’s a cockring. “So why don’t you do exactly that for me? And maybe, if you put on a good show, I will let you come.”

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

Seokmin stares at the golden thing between your fingers and swallows, taking it when you hand it to him. He looks at the ring like it’s a dessert — you know how he loves being edged even if he won’t admit it, enjoys being denied just so the sensation of his orgasm could be bigger later —, closing a fist around his cock and pumping it a few times before slidding the ring down until it fits tightly at the base. Seokmin’s needy moan drowns your own, sounds like music to your ears, hips thrusting into his hand and he can’t possibly hold himself back.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“Hgnnn, fuck,” he whines, pace fast where he does up and down movements on his cock. You lick your lips, mouth salivating with the size of Seokmin’s length. He’s so big, the thickness of him being so much it pleasantly hurts to suck him off, and it doesn’t help that he has such beautiful, veiny hands. “F-fuck, feels so, ah, so good.”

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

Seokmin’s eyes catch yours looking at him like he’s a whole banquet being served just for you, the want and darkness in your eyes surrendering him into a shy mess. He blushes furiously, arm coming up to hide his face from embarrassment and legs pressing together to try and cover his cock — of course it doesn’t hide, Seokmin is too huge and too hard for that.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“Don’t do that, sunshine,” you admonish, cooing when he shakes his head. Fingers closing gently around his wrist, you pry his arm away to take a better look at your shy boyfriend. You smile at him, endeared with his cuteness. “Let me see you being beautiful for me.”

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“Y-yeah?” Seokmin murmurs, and you nod at him, fingers teasing on his nipple. His back arches softly, eyes closing and a whimper escaping through his swollen lips.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“Yeah,” you echo, too entranced on his noises to possibly think straight. Big breaths; you will your impatience down, wanting to see Seokmin pleasuring himself some more. “Such a big cock. Makes me want to suck you off until my mouth hurts.”

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

The lewd sound Seokmin lets out to that punches a moan straight out of you, fucking up into his own hand as if your words were the ones doing so. He presses a thumb on his cockhead, spreading the precum all over the tip and slipping his fist further down when he concludes it’s wet enough. Seokmin writhes on the bed, unable to contain the hot surge of pleasure coursing through his veins. His free hand flies to his left nipple, pinching it with more strength than you thought he would — it makes his whole body tremble, head sinking back into the soft pillows and fingers letting go of the red bud to squeeze the sheets so hard his knuckles turn white.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“Please, ah, p-please, wanna— W-wanna cum so bad,” Seokmin begs, wants your hands on him. Of course it’s smaller than his own, but you know how to flick your wrists just right to make him feel good, and he needs that right now. If they were your fingers, they would warp perfectly around his cock, even if they didn't close all the way around it as you stroke him. Or maybe you’d tease him a little, as you sometimes do to him when you want to be a little mean. It always pulls the sweetest and loudest whines from Seokmin, you saying that his reactions are cute. “Touch me, please.”

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“I am touching you,” you tell him with a pout, referring to the caress you’re doing on his biceps. You chuckle when he makes a frustrated groan at your retort, knowing very well how you’re going to be today.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

Seokmin doesn't say anything else — knows it won’t make you touch him anytime sooner —, breath hitching and hips shuddering with pleasure. He continues to slowly rub his finger over the flushed head of his cock in teasing little pats. There’s a bit of squirming on the bed, Seokmin trying to grasp on his own memory the sensation of your hands on him, playing with his thickness with a tiny smirk on your lips and it’s like you enjoy seeing him writhe around in desperation. Seokmin opens his eyes to find you with that exact same expression, moaning when he fucks up into his hand again after he fists his cock, panting heavily.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

Seokmin lets out a soft cry of relief, knows he should be more invested in putting on a show for you than concentrating on his own pleasure, but you love anything he does anyway. Also, it’s not like he has enough patience to hold himself back, has been hard for such a long time his balls may even start to turn purple soon.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

So he plants his feet on the bed, hips kicking faster, rougher, moans high and wanton as he fucks his own hand. Seokmin watches you intensely, how you look so good with those clothes, lips swollen from the kissing and dark eyes lusting for him. He thinks about your mouth on his cock, how you look so pretty with the girth inside it and holding his hips down when Seokmin thrashes around, too desperate to cum down your throat to stop himself.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

Your imagination works on something similar as you enjoy Seokmin falling apart right beside you. What would be his reaction if you pressed your feet on his cock where he sat across the table almost an hour ago? Would Seokmin keep talking with his friends, disguising the way his breath would turn shaky and unsteady? Would he pretend that his girlfriend isn’t rubbing him off right then and there, regardless of who could hear or see the obscene noises of him moaning or the way you move your feet on him?

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“You would love if I touched you right there under the table, wouldn’t you?” you purr your thoughts out, watching the pad of his fingers play with his nipples. Seokmin has always been sensitive there, and honestly it turns you on so much. He nods fast at your question as he pinches the bud, rolling it between his thumb and index finger. “But instead of telling me, you went to our room and jerked off to one of my videos without asking for permission.”

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

Seokmin turns his face away, cheeks burning at what you’ve said. You weren’t exactly talking about the video when you said permission, but rather him touching himself. He knows very well he needs to ask you before doing so.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

Seokmin is nearly on the cusp, but knows he won’t trip over and orgasm solely because of the cockring. It makes him almost cry from frustration, hand jerking himself off furiously and it’s always like he’s on edge, unable to come but the pleasure high enough to make him think that he will.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“I-I didn’t want to, hmmm, ruin y-your party.” Seokmin admits with a small cry, not wanting you to look at his face right now. He struggles to gather words, mind in a haze from neediness. “‘M sorry— s-sorry, please.”

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“Awwww, my sweet baby boy. You’re not ruining anything.” you coo, cradling his face between your hands and turning it towards you, his eyes still not meeting yours even so. You caress his blushed cheek with your thumb, pecking his lips one time and noticing how Seokmin shivers beautifully at the pet name, hand still working fast and rough on his cock. “Honestly, watching you fall apart for me is way better than any party.”

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

Seokmin is visibly affected by the affirmation, head sinking further into the pillow and hips twitching where they thrust up into his fist.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“So beautiful for me, so stunning, my pretty baby boy.”

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

Fuck, and he can’t take it.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“Noona,” Seokmin moans out, shame twisting his gut along with pleasure, but it feels so good to see what the name does to you that he suddenly is not so embarrassed anymore. “Please, please t-touch me—”

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“Fuck, Seokmin,” a hand grabs at his jaw, your body trembling with the need sinking deep within your bones. It’s so fast your mind spins and for a moment you think you might pass out with all the blood surging down to your core. “Shit, call me that again, baby. Come on.”

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“N-Noona— Noona, please, I’ve b-been good,” Seokmin begs, writhing all over the bed, and you think he might start crying very soon if you don’t give him what he wants. “I-I’ve been so good, ah, just— J-just give me what I want, p-please.”

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“So fucking good for me,” you moan, getting on top of his thighs and kissing him stupid. Seokmin lies plient underneath you, pace not even faltering. If anything, it became faster, the little kicks of his hips making you bounce on his lap. “Want you inside me.”

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

Seokmin grabs your waist at that, but you only hold onto his wrists and pin them down beside his head. You move up on his lap until you’re sitting on his hard cock, the wetness of your folds seeping through your panties only serving to remind you how you’re still with your clothes on.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“God, look at you,” there’s a whine, and you’re not sure who lets out, you or him. You move your hips over his cock, like you’re riding it, and the stimulation on your needy cunt makes you squeeze Seokmin’s arms bruisingly tighter. “So desperate… I wanna do really bad things to you.”

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“T-tease me—” Seokmin starts, words being drowned on a choked out moan, and it has you stunt, him saying something like that since he’s usually more quiet in the bedroom. At least when he’s not crying or pleading, of course. “Tease me until I’m begging for it.”

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

The smile you give him is dirty and dark, nearly a sneer, and he throws his head back. If there’s one thing you love about Seokmin is how he enjoys submitting to you. He feels pleasure on letting go as much as you feel taking over, especially knowing that if he wanted to, he could manhandle you right now, push your face on the bed, pull your ass up and fuck you until you cry. But Seokmin won’t. He doesn’t want to. He loves having you on top of him, teasing him, touching him, ordering him around.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“Yeah? Fuck, such a dirty baby boy,” you roll your hips to emphasize your point, basking in the way he writhes so beautifully underneath you. So ready to be torn apart and pieced back together later. Seokmin presses back, moving himself obscenely. “Stay still.”

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

Reaching to the nightstand again, you move your hand blindly there until you’re able to pull a soft blue silk from the drawer. Seokmin widens his eyes at it, gulping at the implications behind the fabric.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“You’re not obeying me today,” you admonish. To be honest, you would rather get the ropes or the cuffs that are in the wardrobe, but your own impatience and desperation ends up winning and choosing what’s closer. “Touching yourself without my permission, not begging properly, trying to take what you want and now… You can’t even do something as simple as staying still?”

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“N-Noona, Noona,” is all he’s able to say, body shaking from wanton. Seokmin let’s you pass the silk through his wrists with practiced ease and ties them up together, and then at the headboard. This way his arms are restricted, biceps bulging due to the position. “I’ll be g-good. I’ll be your— y-your good boy, please—”

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“I’ll be the judge of that,” you tell him instead, fisting his hair and yanking his head backwards. You kiss his chin, parting away to finally take your clothes off.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

Seokmin stares all the way through it, dark eyes drinking the sight of your naked body, the faint sound of the music adding to both of your fuels like a dirty soundtrack.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“Like what you see?” you tease with a raised eyebrow, smiling at the way his cheeks turn red.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“Fuck yes,” Seokmin answers even so, wrists pulling at the silk trapping them as if he’s trying to break free and touch you. The sincerity in his voice makes you blush softly. “Y-you’re so hot, Noona. Can’t believe I have you all for myself.”

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

There’s something possessive burning at his eyes that has butterflies dancing on your lower stomach. You suck a deep breath, leaning down to capture his lips on yours. It’s far too messy for your own good but you don’t really care, wanting nothing more than to kiss the breath out of Seokmin’s lungs.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

You succeed, pleasure swelling up in your insides when you have him panting, mind in a haze and chest heaving uncontrollably. He lies there, pliant for you as you lick one of his nipples. The reaction is immediate, Seokmin’s hips kicking up and his hard cock consequently slipping between your chest. A shiver rocks all over his body, your teeth biting at the red bud and sucking at it until his voice gets an octave higher and so, so sweet it makes you moan.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

You bring your free hand to thumb at the other nipple, tongue doing circles all over it. Seokmin is desperate, thrashing on the bed as if he’s being electrocuted. You bite harder for good measure, snatching at his waist with a firm grip and pining it back down on the mattress.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“So sensitive, my cute baby boy” you appreciate with a hum, making sure to press your chest onto his overwhelmed cock. It’s painted in an angry shade of red now, the veins protruding against the length.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

There’s spit obscenely connecting your mouth to his nipple, and the realization coils heat on your blood and pumps arousal all over.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“People might hear you if you don’t keep it down, you know?”

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

What you’re not expecting is how he tenses at that, muscles contracting, back arching off of the bed and hips stuttering where it fucked his cock between your chest. Seokmin moans, so loud you instinctively put a hand over his mouth to make him quieter.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

When his body falls limp again, the room is full of silence, other than the sound of his labored breath filling the air after you let go of him. You’re completely quiet though, still processing what just happened, head spinning.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“You came,” it wasn’t a question, the scene that just unfolded in front of you being enough confirmation to your suspicions. “You just had a dry orgasm.”

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

Your tone was full of amusement and unbelievaness. You can’t quite grasp that fact; it’s not the first time he has used a cockring, but it’s the first time Seokmin actually was able to come with it on and also being barely touched. Laughing incredulously, you trail a finger down his still hard cock, watching him squirm violently underneath you.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“W-wait, Noona, I—” his words get cut off by his own moan when you take the cockring off, throwing it somewhere in the room as you hurry to fetch yet another thing from your nightstand. “Ah, f-fuck, I j-just came, N-No— Noona—”

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

You close a fist on him after pouring lube on his cock, watching in pure ecstasy the look of bliss turn into one of frustration. You feel Seokmin’s body twitch to the touch of your hand and react heavily as you keep going, with no remorse, slicking his cock up and flicking your wrist faster and faster.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“You know what to say if you want me to stop,” you tell him. It’s overwhelming, really, but nothing could ever top the sensation of your fingers around him.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

It makes Seokmin’s brain fuzzy, and it’s too much, his cock already sensible from his recent orgasm, but at the same time he wants to squirm away, he feels the mind numbing pleasure sink deep within his bones. Seokmin moans louder, pulling at the fabric binding his wrists in place, and shaking violently on the bed.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“Ah! Fuck! Noona… f-fuck… ahh—” he pleads, swollen lips trembling, abs contracting and relaxing, the blushing red running all the way down to his chest, and legs kicking when he tries to get out of your grip because it feels so damn torturously good.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

You take it all in, the burn of arousal lighting a flame on your lower stomach. All mine. You lick at your bottom lip, letting out a soft whine as Seokmin whimpers high in his throat, his hips moving, back arching, head thrown back — beautiful and yours.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“Want me to stop, sunshine? Then say your safeword,” Seokmin groans at your remark, feeling tears well up in his eyes, body writhing out of control. He moans again, shaking his head a no as he humps his hips up into your hand.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“A-ah! Ah! Noona… ah! Hgnnn, Noona, p-please…” he begs, hands trembling and he actually thinks he might go crazy soon.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“Dirty boy, had a dry orgasm even with a cockring just from thinking people might hear you,” you say, tone soft and gentle despite your ministrations. “Should have tied you up there, on the chair, and overstimulated you in front of everyone else.”

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

You press a thumb on his cockhead, so hard you see a tear finally run down his cheek. Seokmin looks beautiful like this. So beautiful.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“Almost came earlier from being caught jerking off too,” you add, brushing a strand of his hair behind his ear. “My sunshine is a little bit of an exhibitionist, isn’t he?”

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

The fight has already left him, leaving Seokmin a stuttering mess. He only moans and shakes his head and pleads and you actually feel a little bad for the cry he breathes out when you let go of his cock. It’s short livid though, the hurry to rearrange yourself and sit on his lap making you almost fall on him.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

Seokmin doesn’t comment on your desperation though, doesn’t even have the strength to, and watches you line him up against your soaking cunt like you’ll die if you don’t get to ride him until sunset, the party long forgotten.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“Need you inside, need you,” you moan as you sink on his cock. Today morning you fucked, Seokmin hugging you and thrusting inside you lazily when he was spooning you just after you woke up, but it still feels almost like too much, the stretch of his cock splitting you open leaving you gaping. “So damn big.”

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

You open your eyes — don’t even know when you closed them — finding the prettiest view you could ever have. Seokmin’s fingers turned white from how hard he’s gripping the fabric around his wrists, and you think for a second that he might break the headboard, if the way he’s pulling at the silk is anything to go bye. The sweat goldens his skin, a gorgeous contrast with the redness tinting his face, neck and the beginning of his chest. And it’s stunning, really, his eyebrows frowned from pleasure, tears in the corner of his eyes and lips swollen from all the rough kissing.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

There is no better canvas to paint a ruined landscape than Lee Seokmin.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

He gasps, throwing his head back when you lift yourself up until only the tip of his cock is inside, and slam yourself back down, pelvis flush against Seokmin’s. You fall in a comfortable rhythm from there on; riding him like a pro, making sure to clench as tight as you can just to see him sob and plead and beg for whatever it is that you’re in the mood or willing to give him.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“G-god— I l-lo—” he tries, struggling to get words out with the way he’s bouncing on the bed with the force of your hips fucking down of his cock. “I love— I love y-you, N-Noona, Noona, fuck—”

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“Seokmin,” you moan, holding his face between your hands. It’s barely a kiss when you lean in to smash your lips on his, more like a moment in which your breath mingles with his and you both become one. “Seok-ah, Seokminnie, sunshine— you sound so, so pretty and sweet, my beautiful baby boy. I love you so much.”

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“U-untie, please,” Seokmin cries out, pulling harder at the restraints. “Wanna t-tou— ah, touch you, please, I have— h-have been so good—”

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“You’re always good, baby,” you reassure him, reaching out with fumbling fingers to undo the knot on his wrists. “Come on, sunshine. Fuck me as hard as you can.”

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

Your brain can’t even process what happens as soon as he’s free; there are big hands on your hips, Seokmin planting his feet on the bed and fucking up inside you so hard you’re not able to support yourself up, body falling limp on top of his. He’s moaning by your ear now, so high and affected, and you think you can actually feel the spit running down from the corner of his mouth and sticking to your shoulder.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“S-shit, shit, Seokmin,” you whimper, louder than you ever had this night, can’t even rock your hips back because Seokmin is holding you tight and pulling you down on his cock, pace brutal and unrelenting. “You’re s-so desperate, fuck.”

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“Wanna cum, w-wanna cum,” he keeps saying, burying his face in the juncture of your neck and shoulder. You feel his lips there, sucking the skin between his teeth and biting at it in a weak attempt to muffle his moans. Seokmin has always been the most vocal between the two of you, but you know it’s useless at this point, the people in your house probably know what is going on by now. “P-please, please, Noona, Noona— Want— N-need—”

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

Before you can even answer him, the chant of “Noona, Noona, Noona” leaving his lips like a prayer has your orgasm hitting you suddenly. Your whole body tenses, muscles contracting tightly as the mind numbing sensation washes all over you, and you don’t know how much time you spend coming but when you come back to yourself Seokmin is still fucking you like it’s the last thing he will ever do.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

You put a trembling hand on his chest and use the other free one to grab at his wrist, signaling for him to stop. At that, Seokmin starts crying. Like really crying.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“N-no— Let m-me come, let me— L-let me come, please, please, please,” he begs, and you coo at him.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“Shhh, it’s okay, baby,” you peck his lips gently, wiping the cascading tears with your thumbs. “I want you to come on my face. Can you do that for me, hm, sunshine?”

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

Seokmin stares at you with big wide eyes and you think you might die from how cute he is. He nods what it seems like a hundred times.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“Words,” you remind him with a soft, calm voice, and smile when he answers a meek yes, please. “Good boy.”

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

Seokmin blushes, sniffing a little and lifting his upper body up to have a better view of your lips descending on his cock. You kiss the tip one time, giving it a kittenish lick, and suckle at it hard enough to prove the salty taste of precum, not wanting to tease him more since he has been so good. Seokmin shivers, hips contorting on the bed, and you feel pride swell inside you when you realize he’s trying to stay still.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

You give his thigh a gentle pat, licking at the underside of his cock and bobbing your head a few times. You grab at the base of his length, slaps it on your tongue and look up at Seokmin. A small part of you gets embarrassed with the way he’s watching you so intently, but it’s quickly replaced with a burning need to see him coming.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“G-gonna cum, cum, I-I’m— I’m coming, shit, fuck, hgnnn, N-Noona—” you hum at his cries, the last warning you give him before reaching up and taking one of his nipples between your fingers; you twist it as hard as you can, and then he’s coming.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

Seokmin moans, more like screams, and he arches forward, fingers flying to grab your hair so hard it hurts a little. There’s cum shooting out of his cock, your hands helping him out as the white ribbons fly across your face. Most of it lands on your mouth, some on your lashes and cheeks, some on his thighs and abs, and some even end up hitting your hair.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

The thing is that Seokmin doesn’t stop coming. His hips keep twitching, cock slipping and he thrusts on your face, unable to keep himself still as he rides his orgasm. After what seems like a good few minutes of him coming, Seokmin falls limp on the bed, his eyes closed, chest heaving with his labored breath, and looking completely fucked out.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

You’re quick to kiss him, his tongue pushing against yours when he tastes the leftover of his orgasm. His hips kick miserably, a little bit of come sliding down his softening cock.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“Holy shit,” is what he says after a few minutes of silence, laughing weekly. You follow Seokmin, laying down beside him as you do so. “I think that was the best orgasm of my life.”

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“I think so too,” you agree, Seokmin moving his body to lay on his side and take a better look at you. He brushes a strand of your hair behind your ear, his heart eyes making butterflies dance on your stomach. The fact that he’s looking at you like that even so you’re dirty with come, sweat and possibly spit makes you want to marry him. “So, you have an exhibitionism kink.”

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

The affirmation seems to have caught him off guard, his cheeks warming up adorably as he coughs. You giggle when Seokmin tries to turn his back on you.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“I hate you,” he mumbles with a pout.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“Nah, you don’t,” you dismiss, and you’re right, he doesn’t. He could never. “Maybe we should try that out later?”

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“Try what?”

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“Me tying you up in a chair and making you come in front of everyo—”

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“Shut up!” Seokmin laughs and yells at the same time, hitting a pillow on you. You just grab it and throw it somewhere in the room. “You’re dirty.”

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“So is you,” you add with a smile. Seokmin turns around and pulls you by the waist.

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“Yeah,” he admits, hugging you tightly. It should be disgusting considering both of your conditions, but it only feels right. “Only dirty for you.”

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

You scoff, mortified.

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“Now you shut up,” you swat at his — incredibly big and hot — arm, his giggles making all types of things to your heart. “Fucking sap.”

⠀ ⠀ ⠀

“Hmm hmm,” Seokmin hums, and looks at you like that again. Full of love and respect and content, and there’s no better feeling than this. Together. With him. “A complete sap.”

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