#sorry i am gay but this book aint for me
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Okay a short book review on:
I Kissed Alice
Most Girls Love novels I will catch myself having shivers on simple hand touches or eye contact and I knew that I feel the tension, but this book doesn't. It starts of as enemies and their interaction was pure hatred. The online thing going on between them, felt like nothing. No sweetness nor shivers I am looking for. Not even a sample of sext stuff wtf. Anyway, it feels weird tho that they suddenly want each other, after that hurtful fight.
I just don't feel any connection with the characters even their friendship seems shallow. The environment seems stressful as well, I don't feel like I am reading a romance novel instead, a competitive teenagers angst and toxic. Girl should help girls and i don't see that here. I know girls love the drama but when they fight, there is absolute tension on kissing each other rather than pulling their hair stuff. Some parts is skippable. I am much invested in Alice Cheshire's relationship than them Rhodes and Illiana they better be enemies really.
But I appreciate the Ingram's siblings, I love their interactions most in the story and thats it. Even the main loverteam I don't feel any kilig.
4/10, reading this book is meh. I feel like my imagination is better than this book... wait let me write that down... rate that 2/5.
#i kissed alice#sorry i am gay but this book aint for me#GIVE ME LOVE#i hate all the characters except Griffin#reconnecting#nah there is no connection
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Now I'm very curious about this Ruggie 2nd Years Rizz...
oh shit now i gotta back up what i said LOL omg lemme think um um ok here are scenes off the top of my head that TO ME are certified ruggie moments w/the second years and also me talking about their vibes,,,
that one vignette story [i think ruggies ceremony robes] where hes helping out at mostro lounge and he and azul have a hive mind moment where theyre bonding over their money grubbing ways, and jamil is also there and says something like 🧍 hmm wow you two are unnverving when you are together actually. and theyre both like "yeah normally i cant stand his fake ass but we can unite over money ♥" what the hell ever common gay goals i guess 😒kljksldfjdskljf they could come up with SO many money schemes together,, a slowburn via ruggie doing odd jobs at mostro lounge... it could happen ejlekjwrlkdjfsf
actually kalim has a flavor of rizz too but in his case it's like "everyone is my best friend and i cannot be deterred even tho it's kind of off putting in hater school but also it's kind of cute" while ruggie is that "lovable scamp who is kind of a bitch and definitely scheming behind your back" vibe LOL and theyre so funny together. i think kalims lab coat story is the one that comes to mind for them where kalims like OH FUCK i have to cancel the party bc jamil said so and cant help sorry everyone :( and ruggies like NO i will NOT forgive you we HAVE to throw the party. with food. and then they go make food together in the cafeteria and it's cute. i think thats also the one where ruggie was like lol teeehee what if we got this outrageously expensive mushroom for the party haha teehee- and then sam was like yeah i have it in stock and kalim was like yeah ok sure ill buy it. and ruggie was like WAIT FOR REAL??? they are just always a silly combo when theyre together fdlskjfskl like prince and the pauper or whatever... ruggie is doin whatever it takes for a free meal or a quick dollar and kalims like "i am sweating cash money and i love my friends ill buy you whatever you want :)" ruggie has the street smarts to keep kalim alive and kalim can keep ruggie fed lol. ruggie would have his hands full forever but i believe in them LOL. but also ruggie calls silver and kalim the "ira fuwa" "facepalm brigade" and how theyre so frustratingly like. nice and/or oblivious and i think that's FUNNYYYYYYYYYYYYYY i like when ships are FUNNYYY so to me. thats more points fklsdjfkls
ruggie and jamil. they are so funny. i already liked them as 🤝 fellow working class boys [similar to why i LOVE ruggie and epels bond but sorry epel youre banished to the first year realm this post aint about u] i lied when i said off the top of my head, bc i had to double check this one but in JAMILS R card regular uniform story it's jamil ruggie kalim and leona at lunch, jamil and ruggie have like a 2 second bonding moment of basically being the attendant of the other two. once again ruggie likes food and jamil really likes to cook so i do feel theres promise there. but then also when GLOMAS halloween event dropped, that was more proof. that one scene where theyre paired off running together and manipulate those npcs to buy themselves more time,,, w/their schemes and lies and similar style unique magic/signature spells.... sjdklfjdskf they could be such an awful little duo together and i love that for them. truly an iconic moment of partners in crime
RUGGIE AND RIDDLE!!! this is one i initially was like "huh where is this coming from" back in ye olden days of twst bc i'd randomly run into this one person who kept making fanart of them and every time it would end up being by the same person lolol. and back then i think they hadnt interacted too much outside of that one scene in book 2 where ruggie steals riddles magic pen [teehee enemies 2 lovers potential,,, tried to push riddle down the stairs/got his best friend instead... also could apply a lil with jamil considering jamil was also one of his victims] anyway i like their opposite energies, kinda like a lite version of floyd/riddle with ruggie taking the role of one being more loose and, again like w/kalim, hes more street smart. riddle was sheltered all his life. i think theres potential to balance each other out. AND THEN ALSO later we got halloween 2 event where riddle ruggie and ortho were in a group together searching for mirror shards. i thought it was cute when they bonded doing a lil puzzle and all talked about doing an escape room together. I saw cute fanart of that once and it hasnt left my mind
ALSO speaking of riddle but also kalim and silver theres the beloved anthology comic which counts in my mind. the one where silver was struggling to stay awake and asks ruggie for his notes and then kalim is like LETS HAVE A STUDY PARTY ILL ASK JAMIL TO HELP!!!! and ruggies like YEAH FREE FOOD also we should invite riddle.
look at that. like ruggie even openly admits later hes literally just there for the feast but he made a point to be like We Need Riddle Here Also and i literally cant stop thinking about it actually. like sure hes right in terms of studying but like did he even give a shit about that part. also since im here and i need to talk more silver/ruggie theres also the part of this same comic where silver touches ruggies ears and he immediately falls asleep
like wtf thats so cute [source btw...] [i cant remember if they had any rule on reposting screenshots but i didnt see any when i was glancing around so i hope i am not killed for this!!!!]
once again ruggie has the street smarts that can assist silver who grew up in the woods with his only other socialization boy his age for years being Sebek Zigvolt jklJFDKLSJKFLS blease teach him what regular(?) boys behave like. and then back again like what i said in kalim's part, where ruggie called them in one of those laundry stories [i cant fuckin remember which vignette it is bc at least 2-3 of them are about laundry and i MIX THEM UP] but i think it's one where ruggie goes with leona to diasomnia and are like "hey bitches malleus' robes got mixed up with leonas" and silver is there and silvers like "oh my god malleus made a friend" and leonas like "i literally do not like that man what the hell" and ruggies like "sorry leona silvers just like that. so is kalim btw." like im obsessed with the concept of silver and kalim being So Sweet And Oblivious that apparently the other second years are all looking at them like a unit and being like "man what is their problem" thank you ruggie for this lore. for my life.
ruggie n the twins r also funny. like what i said with azul i could see him having a slowburn when hes working at mostro lounge lol and i could see it as a haters to lovers thing bc everyone in this place is a BITCH but we love that for them. i think ruggie would be fighting for his life with floyd but tbh who wouldnt be. actually idr much of their interactions except i think they were both in portfest on team performer and even then i cant recall specific interactions fjklfjeklwjflew bc floyd was like fuck this im already good at shit you bitches are on your own LOL but also i remember floyds whole thing bein he can just pick up whatever skill as needed whenever it suits his fancy and he learns real fast. i think ruggie could #respect the grind except i dont think floyd gives a shit about doing it for money. redirects to azul and his schemes JFKLDJSKLFJSD still. i think they could be funny plotting scheming bitches together if they wanted. i think this is my weak spot i cant remember many specifics BOYS WHERE ARE YOU!!! but also theyre the 2 odd ones out in terms of second years w/o an onscreen classmate. thats one point in their box LOL. i think floyd would join ruggie in a little snooping and stealing of snacks. for funsies.
okay and then jade the reason i even brought it up in the tags of this post lololol even they i think havent interacted too much that i can remember <- suddenly remembering book 3 was all about bananaclaw helping destroy octavinelle. except i think ruggie was barely there actually and the twins were mostly in the water so this still tracks. i think. well anyway that's not the point MY POINT IS RUGGIE AND JADE in ruggies R card uniform story is funny. i love that ruggie was in the cafeteria in the middle of the night looting for snacks and then jade just. Was Also There. hello fellow student i am very normal and taking a walk at night <- i actually did this in college all the time so idk why im bullying him but. dont fancy boarding high schools have CURFEWS actually idk. anyway. i love how quick and crafty ruggie is the second he realizes hes FUCKED UP and jade might KILL HIM [and then jade just. god i literally never know when hes being coy or genuinely like 🧍what do u mean i am a regular teenager why ever would anyone fear me.] anyway they kinda matched each others freak A LITTLE a little bit. jade is a bigger freak but i like that ruggie sorta has that octavinelle schemer vibe to him sdkjfklsd "hey you ate my vegetables" "oh FUCK well ill trade u with recipes" "wow these r awesome teach me more" "NO that will cost you >:)" "ohoho i see how it is >:)" like ruggie feared for his life for a second but as soon as he did what he promised he was like alright fuck u im outta here teehee. fears deleted. bastard mode returned. a scheming silly little guy who is good with cooking fits right into the little octavinelle pocket
ok that's enough!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i actually think about the second years a lot more than i care to admit LOL they are really fun to mix and match but tbh i say that about every group of students. divorce vortex third year toxic yaoi polycule.... second years are all shoved in a barrel that im shaking back and forth at top speed.... the first years are always trying to kill each other but are also kinda ride or die,,, ough it's cute i love sorting characters into groups and drawing connected lines to them jKLFJDSKLFJ ok i have to go draw overblot yaoi now. thats not related to ruggie but it's related to second years. bye!!!
#asks#should i tag him. sure.#ruggie bucchi#ummm#fuck didnt i say i wanted to make a tag for posts like these where like#it's not a fic so it doesnt go into my writing tag but also im Saying A Lot and would like to store it for ref... like my floyd/riddle post#slkdjfdsklf w/e ill figure something out
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Black neighborhoods are over-policed, black men are more likely to be convicted of a crime than white men and are similarly vulnerable to racial profiling, black people are more likely to live in poverty, one of the men trying to get into office and governor of Florida is banning books that talk about slavery. Gentrification primarily effects black neighborhoods. and this isnt even getting into the rampant colonialism at the core of capitalism and the commodification of black art and religion. Did you know they sell skin whiteners in the Philippines? some of the most popular porn categories fetishize black and asian people? Did you know that even in desperate situations, tourists are valued over locals in hawai'i? black drivers are more likely to get pulled over by police. The alt right is back in vogue and you somehow think that that has nothing to do with racism. i am sorry but just because it aint on the books doesnt mean that it magically doesnt exist. For every video of a black man beating up a white guy, theres 20 of a cop killing a black man or fuckin snuff film featuring a black woman being molested. funny you bring out south africa, apartheid was only abolished in the 90s. The last president we had sold himself on xenophobia
I dont like arguing with you or anyone for that matter. I just really think you have a naive view of the world
.... Hun, only two things you listed could even count as oppression. And even then, they aren't things white people don't face too.
Only the thing is: poor neighborhoods with primarily white people are also over-policed, most victims of police violence are again white people, there is no colonialism at the heart of capitalism (something tells me you're the type who conflates corporate greed with Capitalism), porn categories are not fucking oppression, gebtrifications effects all poor neighborhoods not just or even mainly black ones, the "commodification of black art" is not fucking oppression (black people commodify it themselves, what the fuck are you talking about?), the "skin whiteners" shit is not oppression either and is more due to the fact that rich people tend to be a bit paler regardless of race than any racist oppression of poc, the shit in Hawaii is not oppression either (it is wrong, yes, but you cannot claim as that as racist oppression of poc as it is not because of race but because of greed), black drivers are NOT more likely to get pulled over anymore that has not been true for decades, and I didn't say "beating up" I said murdering. And Hun, for every 20 videos of a black person being killed by cops or a black woman being molested, there are literal thousands of documented AND undocumented cases of white people facing the same and worse that don't get shown in media because why would they, white people dying doesn't get clicks, and no the fuck the alt right is not "back in vogue" they are rightfully viewed by the majority of the country as idiotic backwards-thinking mouth-breathers. Many even want to commit violence on them and you wanna claim the alt-right has ANY real fucking power in America? Seriously? They had to fight tooth and nail to even get the right to say no to making gay wedding cakes and you wanna claim they're "back in vogue"? Ridiculous.
And bitch WHAT, I am the one who has a fucking naive view of the world? Says the idiot who thinks they can't be racist to people with pale skin cuz sometimes a black person is killed by a cop even tho white people are killed way more, or because some person in non-white-majority country faces something fucked up that you somehow attribute to white people instead of their own governing body. Oh, And let's not forget you think apartheid not being illegal until the 90's somehow makes the genocides in South Africa not matter.
You, my friend, are a racist who only sees the world in black and white, but you seriously wanna claim I am the one who has a naive view of the world? I hate to say it, but even as an American myself I must say you have a very American-centric attitude. Like clearly you are among the privileged American populace to view shit like this. Our views on racism are so fucking eschewed it's ridiculous. Idiots like you just don't wanna admit you are not better than the race you hate.
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wow. the overexcitability was showing in that day.. sorry bout the mistypes i swear i’m great at writting i just am so busy and have adhd so i write too fast lol.
okay soooo to sum up the two directions, mostly for the like minds universe and TSH coming to them, would be more along the lines of a total rewrite of the plot of LM in the keeping out of the whole Templar Knights shit cause i dont know shit about it and aint tryin to do that research just yet. lol but instead tying the Dionysus and maybe other greek mythologys in since i just got a few books to study and it’s gonna be somewhat chaotic and maybe still inappropriate for the age group actually because... greek mythology and all these chatoic gays in any universe ya know, buuuut i mean the original was just as fucked and not for youths.. so, fuck it.
for the LM coming to TSH universe they would be inserted into the beginning and the plot would then change from there. i think some love triangle stuff would def ensue as well as some recklessness on the part of someone who gets too manic off it and has to be brought back down by Henry?.. should he still be the master mind? idk.. maybe him and Alex? or Nigel?.. yeah, i’m also curious if i should ignore the ending of LM and keep the Nigel we see through out and Alex as well, or if yall would prefer me to keep them as the reverse that the ending entailed. (ie: Alex was actually the psycho and Nigel wasn’t?.. but more the victim of him. but i like them being chaotic togetherrrr tbhhhh cause chaotic gays amiright!? of course i am!) idk idkayyyy... anyways, any ideas yall have, feel free to comment them or shoot them anon or not, in asks. i do be off a lot lately cause i is busyyyy with studies but i’ll peep back on before i start anything new. atm working on wrapping up old fics to get out of drafts for other fandoms.
Look out for it, coming to and Ao3 near you soon!!!
Figured out my idea for my contribution to like minds fandom. I can believe there’s no cross over content with these two fandoms!!! THERES SO MUCH TO WORK WITH!!!
Should I age up Nigel and Alex and have them insert into TSH? That’s what I was thinking so things can get chaotically queer or age down and out the boys from TSH in boarding school with them? GOSH!!!! So many ideas!!! Comment or shoot me an ask or dm to vibe about things
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A MESSAGE TO THE PJO FANDOM
so hello friends on the other side
I understand some of the major concerns regarding characters like piper and the feather and hazels description but when you bring Leo and Reyna into the fucking conversation I have lost all respect.
ANYONE CAN BE ABUSED, ETHNICITY HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH IT
LATINO CHARACTERS
Reyna is not a negative stereotype, she isn't defined by being latina and neither is Leo, he isn't a stereotype simply because he’s latino and was abused. also him being called an elf was because he was short, which had nothing to do with him being latino. also the mamacita comment like y'all hide under the label “progressive” but ignore that mamacita has been a thing in Latin American communities for a fucking while. its not an insult dammit. its something that happens in our communities!!! its like saying muchacho y'all don't see men bitching about that.
also shocker I read the mamacita comment and I can proudly say I didn't go
“RICK YOU RACIST BITCH”
things that actually happen in communities aren't racist
and before any of y'all come at me with the usual you’re white excuse, hello friends im Peruvian and Paraguayan.
I don't think he’s perfect but bitching about characters like Leo which gave many of my Latin American friends hope for similar characters destroys your “listening to minorities” argument
also the lol “hes Mexican taco bad” argument like I live in Mexico we eat tacos like every fucking day. its literally a fact. and Leo isn't just defined as taco man.
believe it or not us latinos respect rick because he gave us role models and characters like us. we don't define a character by one line and instantly call discrimination. like yes a asian character can be snobby it has nothing to do with ethnicity. y'all are making this about ethnicity. an asian character can be anything, just like a white character or a black character or a gay character. people are not simply defined by their labels like ya’ll think. y'all are just a bunch of easily triggered snowflakes that can't live with that. they can be influenced but in the end labels are labels we are all human and should be treated as such.
LGBT REPRESENTATION
another thing Reyna was never officially a lesbian that was YOUR interpretation not riordans. IF HE DIDNT STATE IT , SORRY HONEY IT ISN’T CANON! I don't care about how she was “lesbian coded” if he didn't state it it isn't canon.
I am so sick, as a lesbian, to see people use ALL QUEER DEATHS as a bury your gay tropes, what happened to seeing us as humans? why can't we be treated like any other character? if we die we die, it isn't always “haha gay evil boom death”. sometimes fully fledged characters have to die friends.
Nico isn't a bad gay character, he’s just a normal character who happens to be gay and has suffered major trauma. HIS TRAUMA WAS CAUSED BY HIS UPBRINGING, Nico isn't a 2000′s character, he’s from the 30′s, so obviously he woudn’t be perfect with his sexuality for gods sake it was the 30′s. the exact same thing happens with hazel, she isn't a modern black woman, she's a 30′s black woman. Nico’s coming out isn't him as a 21st century teen its from the time when the GOVERNMENT KILLED YOU FOR BEING GAY
also saying there are no lesbian characters? like wow look emmie and jo don't exist. Lavinia doesn't exist. poison doesn't exist. thanks fam you really make yourselves look smart here. simply because rick never said the word gay doesn't mean the gay characters don't exist friends. they are just labeled as what gay characters should be labeled as.... human.
LESBOPHOBIA & RACISM
im not educated in muslim or black culture so I won't mention characters like sam and hazel and piper because I respect and I am highly critical of what rick put in his books to describe these specific minorities.
HOWEVER saying rick is a lesbophobe, a homophobe, a racist a sexist cis guy is like do y’all wanna be taken seriously? use arguments don't hide behind words.
rick isn't a perfect writer but y'all really don't know how to criticise, y'all just hide behind big boy words and back it up with no evidence, just opinions.
rick doesn’t have the best minority rep out there but he is damn well trying and I respect that unlike all you fucking idiots.
SHIPS
now onto ships.... yay
frazel: im not gonna censor it like you pussies, believe it or not 13&16 year old relationships exist. they might not always be healthy but they exist. to deny this is to be stupid
solangelo: another ship that is censored..the main argument I've seen is that it isn't developed and will isn't even a character... he was in last olympian and lost hero not my fault y'all have fish brains. I don't care if you dislike it but don't be like “ANYONE WHO SHIPS THIS IS AN ABUSIVE WHORE” like wow you always preach about accepting all ships and then throw this? also if you hate solangelo because of the “abuse” but ship percico like hi friends Nico is 4 years younger than Percy.. if y'all hate frazel because of the 3 year age difference y'all should hate this too.
CONCLUSIONS AND SHIT
not every character minority or otherwise is gonna be the way you want them to be, believe it or not any character can be anything, black characters can be loud, white characters can be loud. if they're only loud because “haha black” then THATS an issue not the simple existence of a loud black woman who has a loud personality.
y'all be here bitching about drew and I've never heard the asian perspective of this? just a bunch of black and white people telling asians they should be offended. was that just an uno reverse?
also last point stereotypes aren't always a negative thing and y'all need to get that in your heads.
anyway stay mad hoes <3
from a sane Peruvian <3
EDIT
I saw this beauty and had to comment on it
“having LGBT characters experience abuse and violence. nicos forceful outing rubs me the wrong way, especially because hes called a coward for being in the closet. its violent and kind of disturbing to make your gay character come out of the closet by force. maybe write better. additionally, alex's abusive father and subsequent homelessness because of her being trans is badly written.”
oh noooo gay characters can't deal with homophobia anymore ! like I can tell you have never been punched for being gay. is it bad to showcase how trans and gay ppl are 40% of homeless youth? or is even mentioning that discrimination? believe it or not some of us live in countries where people try to kill us. you have an advantage and it shows. about the coward thing...
was FUCKING CUPID A GOOD CHARACTER? NO? I REST MY CASE. CUPID IS NOT SEEN AS A GOOD PERSON THEREFORE HE IS NOT A GOOD PERSON GET THAT IN YOUR THICK SKULLS.
YOU HEARD IT HERE FOLKS LGBT FOLKS DONT GET FORCED OUT OF THE CLOSET
#NEVER HAPPENS IN REALITY.
JUST BECAUSE YOU WERENT FORCED OUT OF THE CLOSET DOESNT MEAN OTHER PEOPLE HAVE THAT SAME LUXURY.
maybe stop spewing bullshit <3
(so I get that this scene can remind people of being outed and it can hurt them however this scene was never intended to be a good thing it literally says Nico is scared of facing his emotions)
EDIT NUMBER 2
oh boy rick really pissed off the snowflakes that I share a fandom with
“give Nico to the gays” no? he would be a femboy and they would yeet his trauma like ssrsly?
also hate rick? bitch no one is forcing you to read his tweets.
death of the author is such a toxic thing like the mans is alive boo he aint going nowhere..like What the fuck
EDIT NUMBER 3
anyway final thoughts on this :
nico insn’t Uwu gay and its an insult to his character
Reyna is not a lesbian canonically (neither is Thalia)
Leo and Reyna are not racist
none of ricks characters are written as insults to their communities
and if I see one more “but ....phobia/ ...ism I will do very illegal things
peace lol
RICK RIORDAN UPDATE:
congratulations rick antis! you have successfully harassed a 56 year old man into leaving social media! wow so progressive!!!! this totally won't backfire or anything!!!
all jokes aside all of you who harassed rick to the point of someone else taking over his social media should feel ashamed
#anti rick riordan#uncle rick#rick riordan#percico#solangelo#frazel#rick riordan criticism#rick riordan critical#percy jackon and the olympians#heroes of olympus#house of hades#caleo#anti caleo#riordan critical#riordanverse#antis please interact#I wanna see if anyone can counter my arguments#quarantine has been boring#things I've learned about the anti riordans is that they are spineless little wokeskolds#pipabeth#percy jackson#discourse
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Oliver! (1968) Live (re) watch!
i have already seen oliver!, but not in ages, so i decided to watch it again, enjoy
very long post warning
fuckin hell these opening credits are LONG
i love the fact instrumentals of songs in the movie are playing
i have chocolate popcorn, apple lucozade and oliver! on, life is good
yes i know mark lester is oliver ive seen this like 20 times can i watch the film now
OH ABOUT FUCKING TIME
god is love
IS IT WORTH THE WAITING FOR IF WE LIVE TILL 84 ALL WE EVER GET IS GRUELL
i forgot how much of a banger food glorious food is
LOOK AT BABY MARK LESTER 🥺🥺🥺
ads in middle of movie be like
its harry secombe!
AMENNNN
oliver gets bullied the movie
look at this poor kid
MOREE????????
oh yes oliver i love this song
O L I V E R
poor kid
without any bannister yikes
the one who named him........O-L-IV-ERRR
oh were outside now
olivers just been kicked out oh shit
but on the plus side he has a cute ass hat on
BOY FOR SAY AL
look at oliver 🥺 he deserves better
SOWERBERRY MORE LIKE SHITTERBERRY
theres a severe lack of thats your funeral and i shall scream
noah claypole more like noah clayprick
“perhaps... if i had a tall hat?” BABEY
HES GOT HIS TALL HAT ON YES OLIVER
oliver said dab on them haters from your old gaff youre a funeral advisor now and theyre still homeless
DONT INSULT HIS MUM FUCK YOU NOAH
YES OLIVER KILL HIM
yes stuff the nine year old in a coffin and sit on it well done
"OLIVAH ??" "Yes im here: ((("
ITS MEAT!
oliver deserves better man
im gonna cry and were like 25 minutes in.
ik its not mark singing but whoever it is CAN SING WTF
i want to give him a hug
OH SHIT HES RUNNING AWAY
hes in the lettuce
LONDON YOU MADE IT !
yes oliver trains exist
DODGER!!!
whach you starin at aint ya ever seen a toff
the beak
look at lil jack wild
me more hintimate friends
cockney accent™️
the artful dodga
CONSIDERR YOURSSELF AT HOEME COSNIDER YOURSWLF OEN OF THE FAMILY !!!!!!!!!!
im sorry i love this song
look this scene is awesome, but it would be COMPLETE with charley oh wait he was demoted to extra and everything interesting abt him was given to dodger
he should have gotten the nobody tries to be ladeeda or uppity bit I WILL DIE ON THIS HILL
this cast is BIG
okay i am a Charger Enthusiast but do we all agree there is something oddly homosexual about oliver and dodger in this song
note how dodger is scared of the police FORESHADOWING
ive taken to this SO STRONGITSCLEARWEREGOINGTOGETALONG
how many extras is this ???? yall better be gettin paid
its dodga comin up
this set is sraight out of the book i love it
CHARLEY MATE IM SORRY THEY MADE YOU AN EXTRA
“oh not again” does dodger just always show up with random workhouse kids
ah yes fagin the character whos still a negative jewish stereotype
more and more big cast
THESE SAUSAGES ARE MOULDY! (am i going to freak out whenever charley does anything because i love him? yes)
stfu drink your gin
is this a laundry?? no fam
THE BEST FUCKING SONG IN THIS MUSICAL
IN THIS LIFE ONE THING COUNTS
sorry if i dont add to this until pick a pocket or two is done bc its a straight banger
this song is EVERYTHING
hard at work lol ok
did he make those himself??? no
couple a wipes
EMBROIDERED THEM??? no
petition for all oliver twist adaptations to refer to charley as master bates like the book and for him to have actual lines and not have his actor switched at least three times
i dont even now who charley is at this point because his actor is switched many a time im just gonna say purple blazer kid is charley
anyway charley bates supremacy
whos bill sikes??? NO
fuck bill all my homies hate bill
rum tum tum is a banger
go bed now
take your hat off in bed dodger
movie fagin has rights
fagin leaving where will he go
BET IS THAT YOU
FUCK OFF BILL NO ONE LIKES YOU
NANCY NANCY HES HERE !!!!!! bet deserves everything and more ily 💖
NANCYYYY!!!!!!
its a fine life more like its a banger
wheres all of bets lines gone
bet 🤝 charley (being demoted to extras)
its not funny anyore bet.. bet girl please sing youre the best fucking thing about this song
such a happy song about domestic abuse
THERE SHE IS THATS MY GIRL BET I FUCKING LOVE YOU
bullsye rights!
i hate how this movie made fagin more symathetic but he’s still a “greedy jew” stereotype
oliver?????
at this moment fagin knew he fucked up
nancy you deserve better than bill
oh hi dodger forgot you existed
and the rest of you except oliver
ah yes charley “sausages” bates i missed you
THESE FUCKING KIDS THEY ALL LOVE BET AND NANCY MY HEART
im a regular gent i am. no dodger you arent
why is “permit me to assist you across the road” so fucking funny
pov dodgers back on his bullshit so you have to pretend to be a horse and cart for him
not “sir artful” 😭😭😭
anyfink for youu
WHAT FISTICUFFS???!!!
i feel sorry for the child extras man theyve prob had to film this scene like ten times
THESE KIDS CAN SING
the boys dancing with eachother is too fucking wholesome i love this
again, movie fagin rights
weed riissk lifee and limmbb
you promised we could go see the angin!!!!!
ats on boys time were off
THIS IS MY FAVOURITE SONG
HOW COULD WE LET HOW COULD WE FORGET OUR DEAR OLD FAGIN WORRY!!
mate that aint single file did you not hear him
am i the only one who can hear london bridge is falling down in the back??
our pockets hold a watch of gold that chimes upon the hour!!! a wallet fat an old mans hat!!! the jewels from the tower!!!
WE KNOW THE NOSEY POLICEMEENNNN
dodger and charley (i am SURE charley is purple blazer kid even if havent seen this film in ages) are GETTING INTO THIS
oliver 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺
movie fagin rights pt 27238227
DODGER OLIVER COME ON!!!!!!!!! alright dude chill
ARE YALL SEEING THIS SHIT, I WAS RIGHT, I TOLD YOU THAT THE LAD IN THE PURPLE BLAZER WHO SINGS “a wallet fat an old mans hat” WAS CHARLEY BATES AND GUESS WHAT HE FUCKING IS. I WAS RIGHT, PURPLE BLAZER KID IS CHARLEY YOU CAN LEAVE NOW
no dont were only an hour in
three kids on the back of the omnibus what will they do
dodger and charley said be gay do crimes
ah shit now look what youve gotten us into dodger
IT WASNT EVEN OLIVER IT WAS CHARLEY AND DODGER GO AFTER THEM
are dodger and charley straight up framing oliver for a crime they commited while also helping him escape
yes they are why are we surprised
i hate to break it to you dodger but hiding oliver in a meat sack doesnt work
OLIVERS ON THE ROOF????
charley and dodger got oliver into this mess and they are not going to get him out
WHY DIDNT YOU LOOK AFTER HIM????? right calm down fagin
how could i help it :((((
no bill!
stan nancy
“two other boys stole it” no shit
BROWNLOW !
run bitch run
right intermission time now
AND WE’RE BACK!
entr acte
who will buyyy
strawberry girl is carrying this
oliver owns my heart pt 278983728938728
this is a banger wtf
okay its done now right
right?????
UHH BILL???? DODGER???? BITCH WHY TF ARE YOU HERE
have bill fagin nancy and the boys been stalking oliver???
NO SHE WONT FAGIN!
shit.
fuck bill
this scene is far more sadder when you think of how the boys have just seen the only woman they see as a mother figure been hit to the flo or, im not crying, you are
as long as he needs me :(
FUCK YOU BILL
rose maylie is that you?!
look at lil oliver!!
BILL FUCK OFF
i hate bill
“look at his togs! he’s got books too!” charley and dodger are my emotional support kids
anyway have i mentioned i hate bill, bc i hate bill.
I REALLY REALLY HATE BILL
even fagin aka the guy whos keeping these kids as pickpockets has more morals than bill
WE STAY CALM!!
no bill i havent heard a dying chicken
act one was just childish antics now we have THIS
fuck bill
YOURE TELLING ME THE BOYS WATCHED THAT????
jack wild is a banging actor. he genuinely looks terrified 🥺
this film..
a mans got a heart hasnt he?? yes you do!!!
a full song dedicated to movie fagin rights?? did i ghostwrite this?? probably
banger
ithinkidbetterthinkitoutagain!
villains theives and nine year olds
MR BUMBLE?????!!!!!!!!!!
fuck bill pt72898376728909878199
bill youre traumatising him
cmon nance do something!!
also completely forgot abt this but uh does monks exist in this i forgot bc we have had no mentions of him yet
nancy tell him who bill is!!!
bullseye deserves better
uhm what is going on
bill sikes more like bill yikes
oliver what are you doing
BILL TERRIFIES ME
FUCK
omg oom pah pah????
leave oliver alone bill hes like nine
oh banger
OOM PAH PAH THATS HOW IT GOES!!!!!!!!!
just asking are nancy and bet lesbians bc they look it
COULD IT BE OOM PAH PAHHHHHH
god i love this song
IT SHOOOOOWSSSSSS
its the same oom pah pah
“She was from the country but now shes up a gumtree she let a fella feed her then lead her a long” foreshadowiinnggg
OOM PAH PAH! OOM PAH PAH! OOM PAH PAH!
nancy is so fucking smart
getting the whole pub singing and dancing to smuggle out oliver? clever
fuck
bill.. no.. bill.. bill????
FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKC
BILL GET OFF HER
NANCY NO
HE STRAIGHT UP COMMIT MURDER AGAINST THE NICEST CHARACTER
BROWNLOW DO YOU NOT HEAR NOTHING
nancy deserved a better death than to be killed by bill fuck bill
EVEN BULLSEYE HATES YOU BILL
ARE THEY ACCUSING BULLSEYE OF MURDER
FUCK YOU BILL
movie fagin rights + fuck bill combo?
youre telling me fagin had an ESCAPE ROUTE??? AT THE BOTTOM OF THE HOUSE THING??? THE WHOLE TIME???
BILL DONT KILL THE CHILD
BILL
fuck, well. #
“WHAT DO I DO!?” “LIVE UP TO YOUR NAME, DODGE ABOUT”
ten quid says dodgers been caught
oh no all fagins shit is gone
BILL DONT KILL THE CHILD PT 2
FUCK YOU BILL
GOD I HATE HIM
OLIVER MATE ARE YOU OK
never have i been so happy to see a character die
rest in shit bill
hi dodger thought you got caught n went to australia
god, this film is so fucking good.
reviewing the situation 2.0 goes hard
MOVIE. FAGIN. RIGHTS!
FAGIN YOU CAN BE A GOOD MAN YOU KNOW YOU CAN
DODGER??????????
IM TOTALLY NOT CRYING RN
FAGIN NO DONT TAKE IT
FUCKING PLOTTWIST
IT MADE IT LOOK LIKE FAGIN WAS GONNA GIVE THE WALLET BACK TO DODGER BUT NO
once the villain you’re the villain to the end
i completely forgot abt this scene since i’ve been reading the oliver twist book and in that dodger gets arrested and fagin gets hanged but here they get away?
god this is bittersweet
I THINK WE’D OUGHT TO THINK IT OUT AGAIN!!!!!
thats where the film should have ended, i get olivers the main character but it ending on dodger and fagin walking out into the sunset is such a pleasing ending man
oliver gets his happy ending abt time
YES CONSIDER YOURSELF AND BE BACK SOON (THE BIGGEST BANGERS IN THE FILM) CREDITS SONGS!!
well.. that was a journey and half
#oliver!#oliver twist#oliver#oliver! 1968#oliver 1968#charlie’s comfort movies#oliver twist 1968#oliver! the musical#oliver the musical#musicals#1960s#1960s movies#60s#mark lester#jack wild#oliver reed#ron moody#shani wallis#and everyone else in the huge ass cast
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Maybel Rhodes: Protectress
Itchy arms. My armbumps bumps take over life and chew my head off like a black mother. Even the sleeves of this sweater craddle these potholes as an english muffin craddles butter. But I'm more than my bumps and I'd make a quip on Fergie, but I'm no Joan Rivers. I'm small, meager. At eighteen, trying to find myself, live my own life. Typical teen drama, boring narrative, sob story. bored already. But know what isn't boring? I like strawberry shortcake and cheeseless pizzas. I have hopes of becoming a journalist and actually leading a career as moreof a Clark Kent than a Mary Jane or whatever the fuck that bitch's name is. Mary Anne? That used to be the name of one of my teachers. Going off; just thinking these thoughts while skateboarding to highschool.
Stay on the sides, away from cars, on the sidewalk, not too close to the white kids. White kids mean white mess, white messes mean cops who sweep the streets and take all the black kids with them in the process. I'm not a racist, just a black kid trying to stay alive in white america. Thank god I'm a weak bitch, one who cries for black men, one who doesn't face real issues like projected aggression. I'm a butterfly, something that men swat away and don't care about until MeToo movements. Gotta be careful but not too careful, kind but not too kind, firm but not a bitch, bitch but not a faggot. faggots suck.
No one thinks to ask these questions, here this thoughts. They see a black woman, better yet, a black female child. Worse thing to live in a ghetto. Sike; I say that I'm black and in a ghetto and get sob points. Fucking racist. I'm skating to one of those Fresh Prince schools. Didn't move on up, I'm simply moving; parents are mid class well grounded and guess what? My parents are still together. Probably breaking up soon but still breaking barriors of broke baby daddies and black slutty whore mothers who don't believe in abortion.
That's humor in of itself. A black kid skates into a white neighborhood with white sidewalks and doesn't have a nigger daddy and nigger mommy. What can be said by those PTA suburban soccer moms who want to demonise me and my own? Or am I palatable and a token black?
Making good grades, going to class on time. Only thing is, I don't have any friends to call. Even if I had one of those top quality iPhone 411s, I still wouldn't want to burden myself with filling up those high-techy contact lists. It's all bullshit after all, just capitalistic bilge. Something to fill the void without actually trying to let the public know that the void they're filling chalks up to capitalism. But again, those little tangents? "What does this have to do with having friends?" Everything. I don't give a shit, I accept shit. I tell things like it is, speak with lisps or change it up by sounding like an oxford professor.Not going to just abandon stream of consciousness 'cause class just started. This aint sims 4 and life ain't something that can be controlled; sped up or slowed down for the sake of an other's pleasure. I'm learning about shit that I'll never use like economics. That's shit that the government gives the state to teach, a little but not enough for highschoolers to overwhelm the system and decide "fuck student loans".
Not too bad here, though. Not all just "fuck hyschool" and teenaged angst. I go to the library, read books, go on my computer, listening to some Biggie and MFDoom and Tribe. Guess I am a nigger. Nigger-me and my nigger music. Even tththough it's they inspiration for they cracker music. Hate on us enough to keep us down but keep us up enough to steal from us. Today I'm reading some teen dystopian fantasy novel that I don't feel inclined to share with you guys. And no, it's not Hunger Games. It's Gunger Hames, the cousin of the franchise. Whoops just gave ya'll the name sorry. Either way I'm into that. Idea of a not-so-distant-future; humans making mistakes that fuck up the planet---disregarding that fact long enough so that the white main character can get it on with someone from the other side. Modern day Romeo and Juliett.
End of lunch, going back to class. It's back to back all day; boring teen shit that nobody cares about. Raising hands, answering questions, not understanding anything by the end of the day. Getting by is my motto. Long enough to get an A in the class and be on those ivy league watchlists. Even if I have to bust my ass to pay for student loans. Leaving highschool after all that non-work---no friends to lie to, no one to walk with, just me and my skateboard. These white paths not dirtied by brown except for my dirt body moving at the speed that a skateboard will go. Shift right here and there. Move away from rocks so that I don't fall headfirst. It's good shit. Here and there there are stone pebbles, blunts from---ironically enough--- the white kids and sharp object that I can't identify. FUCK. I don't have time to move around it and I can't just run offf. My leg'll get cut by it. Gotta just build up enough speed to roll over. Rolling...rolling...here it comes. Crouch down, focus, focus, pump speed anddddd....it stops my speed and loosens one of my bearings. Now I gotta walk the rest of the way back to my white little house with a white picket fence. Man screw--haha pun---this object. I have to use my 20/20 vision to find some small silver bolt that'll practically blend in with this bright ass sidewalk. Fuck white America.
In a little patch of weeds growing like black fists raising in the air I see the bolt and the responsible party for tossing me off the board. I raise my foot to crush this sonnofabiscuit like a bug so that some white kid's bike tire doesn't get licked---mind you this should be considered community service---and I figure that I won't ruin my rubber soles on the glass, so I'll just pick it up and toss it into the sewer. I put the bolt in my sweatpants pocket to keep it safe. I bend over again to peer at the crack in the sidewalk that I'll punt to the other side of the street where the other half of the street lives. It has tribal markings on it and must be, gasp, an ancient arcane ruin that'll give me superpowers. Kidding, you dumb bitch. "Why am I talking to myself this way? Jeez, some self-improvement classes would be nice". It's a bracelet made of some sort of beads. Kindof pretty but caked up with dirt and sand like no-one's business. I'm no Rocket Racoon so I just leave it. Even if I felt that it was interesting enough, I'd have to clean it off and disinfect it. It would just ruin the material underneath. Hm. Hm. Hm. Hm. Hm. Hm. Lemme stop; for real, in this white bread neighborhood, I might be able to get it appraised and pawn it off for some money or at the very least, see if it's worth keeping. I know; "this is the start of every horror movie", every tv show. I get it, but I'll cleanse the jewelry before wearing it. It's fine. It's fine. Hope it's fine. Jeez.
I put the bracelet in my other pocket away from the bolt and walk back home. The soles of my feet hit the white pavement and my feet move in the fashion of jubillee ferris wheels. Slowly rise in a circle, fall in perfect arch. Walking is divine poetry in of itself. Not too long now. A little further. Feels like the day is stretching. Still light outside and the summer-brink of fall--air is warming my rectum. "Oh god, what's with gays and their rectums". You know your g-spot is in your ass, men. It feels good for us too you know. Nice coolness for the butthole----rectum is for men, butthole is for women. I think. See? Not a Cliff Huxtable type; don't know everything. Not an Urkle. Conversations with myself like this are truly golden (ponyboy).
Fondle the silver piece, twist it in lock, get somewhere new. Novel design, simple concept. My rubber soles give me cat-walking abilities and I edge up the stairs. Hear shuffling downstairs in the kitchen. But the smell of musky forest wood with a hint of olive tells me that it's just my father. I'd announce my presence but this isn't a sitcom and I have a phone that I can use to text. Who talks nowadays?
On the table near the keyrack, I scoop into my pockets in search of the goods. The warm cotton touches the cool silver bolt. Set it aside to attach it to the skateboard later. "Why not now?" That'll be a problem for me to solve tomorrow. "Procrastination isn't good" Yeah I know. I've read the same 1990's health pamphlet that the health teachers give out. I hug my side to reach around for the other pocket. Same warmth, same feeling of comfort except...it's a new sensation. Hollow and porous. It's either bone carved into beads or plastic. Hope to...Well, not God, maybe I hope to goodness? Goodness? What am I? A preacher? Maybe that's why I like 16 year old boys. Anyway. It's too white over here for it to be bone. Unless it's some cracker who brought over some hoodoo shit and dropped it somewere. Great. Gonna burn some incense to cleanse it. Then gonna toss it somewhere so that it can't hurt anyone. Wait. It doesn't FEEL menacing. No darkness, no coldness, there's a comfort to be had. I don't see any visible engravings, no bite marks no arcane symbols. It may be safe. Just to be sure, I'm keeping it downstairs for it to curse someone else in the house. I rise up the stairs into the wide landing. Step, rise, step, rise, step, rise. Before I get to the top, I feel funny. Not sick funny or CURSED funny, but someone-is-in-my-presence funny. Strech my neck to look over my shoulder. Not too far to show interest but far enough to see what's going on---it's my dad handling the bracelet.
I whip my body around and I suppose this gives him a start.
"Hey, just got back from school. I'm pretty tired which is why I didn't want to talk. Found that bracelet in the sidewalk cracks before my skateboard broke. I wouldn't touch it if I were you. Don't know if it's cursed or not."
"Cursed? Bee, this is a genuine Sudanese artifact."
"Huh? When'd you turn into a archeologist? Or are you just nerding out about a 'special interest'"
"Har har. Nothing like that. This area used to be an auction town for slaves shipped from Sudan. Martinsville, Pennsylvania wasn't necessarily known for it's 'clean hands' you know. Gentrification made the area look nicer but its history is still pretty shit-covered."
"Ah, I remember now. I heard about this in history class" No I haven't. I don't even have history. Just want to stop talking to him about some dumb bracelet. "Can it sell for big bucks at a pawnshop?"
"I mean, sure if you'd like to get rid of it. Better to give it to the local museum though! It looks to me like it's made out of elephant tusks. Pretty well preserved too! The wearer must've been some warrior. They only wear these types of jewelry if they're the village's protectors. That's what I've read online anyway. You know how the interweb is though. Could be false."
"Oh wow. Ivory? That's a pretty dirty trade. Don't want to give something like that up to white people who continue to promote the trade. This'll just make the ivory market worse. I may keep it; I just wonder if it's cursed or something. I'll ask a local witchcraft practitioner to check it out tomorrow. Can I have thirty bucks for an appraisal along with an after-school snack?"
"Thirty? What're you going to buy? A salmon dinner with asparagus and steak? I'm not giving you Carabbas money. I can do 18. Enough for some street food."
"Not enough for the appraisal!"
"I'm sure the person will be able to work something out for you. You look twelve. You can play the 'Uwu I'm a baby who has no money, please help me out adult!' card. Or, how about this: pretend to be doing a research project for school on Sudanese slaves in the area. Just act like the school lent you the bracelet for the project"
"So lie?"
"I call it embellishment."
"I see"
I reached into his calloused palm and stole its contents, As a thief, I ran upstairs away from the site of the crime, away from the demons that lurked beneath the stairs. That's customary practice when going up stairs, right? To haul ass like there's no tomorrow like we're that black chick from Scary Movie? Sounds about right. I heaved and ho'd swinging my body back and forth up the stairs. Snaking my way into my room where I burrow for my after-school nap. That's what I tell my parents anyway. What I really do is blaze up in my room and turn on the fan. Gotta keep the smoke minimal. "Such a typical teen". Yeah, whatever. Like your generation wasn't popping ass and drinking bathtub wine when ya'll were young, Get outta here.
It's a good high. Kind where you'd listen to lofi and eat peanuts just for the fun of it. Another bong hit. Satisfying. I'm just leaning back on my sofa; it's firm and uncomfy but when I'm blazed, don't none of it matter. I could lose all of my words...give up....let....go.....
"...."
"What is this energy I'm feeling? So warm and electric. Is this love? Am I so sexually frustrated that I'm in love with a bong? Shit, I fuck with that. That's pretty words. 'I'm in love with my bong'. Such nice love. haha."
I'm hungry and it's four am. The weed has worn off. So tired man. Gotta go downstairs for some chips or something. Hungry to the max. Munchies munchies munchies for the weed monster. What a drug.
I creep down the stairs and up once more. My bare footpads cling to the hardwood and leave sweat prints in the shape of my stompers. During my ascent I leave crumbs. Have the house feeling like a Brother's Grimm story. I satisfy my snack desires as I prepare for school in the next hour.
Running water on my arms. Three passes of lotion on arms and legs. Can't be the ashy black kid that look like they an African living in a dirt house. Ain't able to help the rough patches that coat my body but I can help keep my skin moisturized.
A'ight. Got my fit got my board. Just have to screw the bolt back on and find the bracelet. Shit. Left it upstairs. I'm already late as hell. Rushing up the stairs. Search for the bracelet, find it, get out house. Objectives objectives. I spot it from afar and gravitating toward it, put it gingerly in my pocket. Kindof like someone would with a used tissue. Aren't humans gross? I mean, snot? Bacteria-filled snot? Nasty. Thoughts gone, make brain go from thinking to doing. descending now. Board in arm, door opens with the flick of the wrist and just like that, I'm outty. Deck on ground I put my best foot forward and ram it onto the hard cement to push myself forward. Sorry foot, betrayals sure do suck.
School begins, in class siting in a chair. All day, several hours. Ah, the beloved system at work. Great to know that there are adults who "work" all day by keeping kids seated in a chair. Very progressive, America. Library break? I think so. On my laptop, I pull out webpages on the pocketed---the word reminds me of 'closeted---bracelet. NOW I'm imagining a gay bracelet. hilarious. Great. Typing 'Gay Bracelet' into the search bar and am getting rainbow plastic bands. Ya know, the ones that they sell at Hot Topic during pride month.
"Damn, I'm getting sidetracked" She mutters to herself. Imagine if life were a story being told by some omnipotent force? omnipresent? Think that's the word.
With a bit of typing and a bit of focus. Swift movement of hunched fingers. All is complete, then some. Ogdle: "common of the Azande warriors were pieces to signify their status such as septum tusks, mouth disks, necklaces and other adornments. Bones and tusks were common materials of such articles."
Crazy how this history is hidden. Power was taken from us and buried so deep. We're the originals but every piece of history buried underground. Hidden, secretive Big Bad America. Tale fit for young people all over. Democracy, boo yah.
Train whistle blowing through the air. No train nearby, just the sound of a change in the block. I put it all away, sweep it into my bag. Everything is so messy, so fast. On schooldays like this, it feels hard to even take time to breathe. But I get by since the system wants me to. Think I'm going to skip. Not that the next two classes even matter in the long run. "Such a poor black baby, representing her race so poorly". Yeah yeah. Not the black chick that highschools would put on a recruiting card.
Just another push....door after door falling at my fingertips. The same once that touch the coarse sandpaper of my board. Foot on, foot off. kick once, twice, thrice, now we surf the cement. Now it's time to visit good the kind old black woman who practices witchcraft on dolls. That's what you'd think right? No, they're native and keep old customs within the community. Everyone calls them---agender--- Sage. Nonbinary native americans are actually more common than people think.
Before selling the bracelet to some old rich white drudge of society, I wanna be sure that the bracelet can be cleansed first. I mean. To give away black history to the white man? Hellll no with multiple "l's". It is a pretty long ride there, even on a board. Rumbly road. Pebbles everywhere. Thousands of little rocks acting as smaller wheels vying to fling me off. It's too much.
Mumbling of my own. "Where's gentrification when you need it?" Alright, yes I get it. It's a bad joke. Of course gentrification is bad. Blah blah. Time to pick up my skateboard I guess. Walking on this ground feels just as bad as suicide. Feaful of getting my ass flung into the afterlife. Few yards left....or at least fifty feet. Forty eight, forty five, forty-however-long.
Ended up reaching it after twenty minutes. This trip better be worth it.
"Hi there, Miss Sage. Mind checking out this bracelet for me? I need to check it for a curse or evil energy. My cheap father didn't give me enough for a full appraisal but what can you do with nine dollars?"
"For nine? Not much, doll? What was your name again? You look young, do you have an adult's approval for this?"
"Oh, right. You've got me. It's for a school project. School each student a historical object to research. I figured you'd be able to help me get an 'A' on the project, you know?"
"Your manners are lacking but you seem young, so I'll let you pass. Allow me to take a look at it, if you please?"
God. Full-fledged adults really are something else. I'm only eighteen, not eight. Guess I look younger than I am----
Sage starts burning this wood that's tied with string. Incense maybe?
"That incense?"
"It's a closed practice really, so I don't want to expose anything. But it is a form of incense that I prefer to use to cleanse the spirit of objects and areas."
"Ah, didn't mean to intrude. I'm glad that there are still practices that you keep to yourself. Nothing like the White Man stripping us of our culture."
I got a soft chuckle out of them. Glad that they're able to lighten up a bit.
"..."
"OK, so here's what I've found. There's immense energy here; the power coming off of this thing is tremendous. There's nothing negative about this piece. How'd you ever come across it, again? School, you said? Shame that you'll have to give it back. Something like this would provide a large power surge to spirituals. I'd pay a pretty penny for this."
"Mhm"
"Wonder how the school even came across this. I tell you what. Ask your school where I can find something like this and perhaps I'll give you a little something for your intel, huh?"
"Oh. Sure. I'll just--uh---"
"Right, right, right. The bracelet, I'm sorry. Really, it's more an anklet truly, but--ya know what? I'm sorry. Here ya go"
"...take it from ya. Thanks."
"No problem. Come back with more info on the anklet. That'll be your payment for my time"
Got 'caught in a lie it seems. Don't know how I'll snake my way out of this one.
"Brrrrrzzzzz"
Shit, it's five. My dad's probably looking for me.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Chapter two:
" You skipped class? Bee, I know that you're better than this."
God moms bitch too much. Must be the nursing job coupled with her daily acting gigs that make her so aggro.
"I hear ya, mom. I just had some research to conduct after school..."
"Research? Which kind---?"
"The school kind. I don't know what else you want me to say. I'm sorry for skipping lasses. I got too overzealous and went in over my head. It won't happen again."
"Tskk. Better not. I know that I'm gone almost every hour of the day, but please give me a break, baby. Please just listen to your father and follow the rules. All I ask."
"Mhm, even though he-----you know what, nevermind. Am I dismissed? I have to write up today's school report to type"
Phew. Gonna hit the bong now to calm down from this encounter.
Fuck homework. .... ..... Mhm.
Five minutes passs. Fifteen, twenty. Maybe not minutes. hours? seconds? Time is too funny. With LEDs on, the vibe is fatallll. Still have to open a window to let out the smoke but gosh is this magical.
Mhm magic. Does it even exist? Doubt it. It's all science, right? ....
.....
Right. Like, this anklet. Not real power. Not real magic. Just something people believe in. Like God. It's all faith.
"So, theoretically, I could even put it on my person and nothing would even happen"
"And, so it begins"
"WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT VOICE" and why am I screaming?
Get off, get off, get off! Something's dripping on me.
"Tears, they're tears"
Oh god, I fucked up. I knew that I shouldn't have smoked that much. Knew it'd bite me in the ass one day. Now I'm fear-crying. I NEVER FEAR CRY.
It's all a dream maybe. Go to sleep, Bee. Just take a weed nap.
"Ba ba bang"
A booming voice raspy from coffee withdrawal.
"Everything OK in there Bee? You're about to be late for school."
Shit!
No time for conversation. Move it move it move it.
"'Cmon Bee. I'll drop you off at school on my way to the college".
Bookbag? Check. Board? Check.
I feel the rush of air against my cheeks as I fly out the door and jump into the getaway car. Fast, but atleast I'm not Furious. Dad and I chat it up all the way until the tires cross the smooth pavement of school grounds. Departing words are exchanged along with "I love you's" and "knock 'em deads".
That familiar sound. Principal as the school conductor. "Chooo". Just as it drones, my body moves to the steps of teens dragging their feet toward their dreaded first classes of the day. The light of morning cradles the marble arches of the school entrance until the sun starts to suck in the morning cold to blow out midday warmth.
"So, who are you, voice? What's your angle? Typing ensues. The screen watches my fleeting pupils; left, right, side, side. Wouldn't be surprised if the computer got whiplash from me. One scroll, two, three. Read a page. Nothing. Another website. Up and down; my fingers are cramped now. Nada. New Oogdle search: "Can I hear voices with weed smoking." Now I have a hit; "yes weed can have you seeing voices. Many aren't even your own. Maybe lay off the TV for a while."
"Thanks 'BouncyNina29'. Quora is one hell of a place." Guess it must've just been the drugs then. Hilarious, me hearing some voice. "Gotta lay off the bong smoking".
"Shhh!!" Some nerd in a striped beanie raised a finger to pursed lips.
Sorry, sorry....Jeez. "My bad" You know what? Maybe I can visit----
the train whistle interrupts my 11pm "ball" with myself. "Dammit". OK. Maybe I can bribe one of the delinquents behind the school to take my place in English. Teacher's not there anyway; the sub won't know the difference. Time to go pay someone off.
"..."
"Here ya go, five dollars."
"A'ight and you said what room that English class in?"
"301 B man. It's at the end of the third floor, right wing. Hard to miss and---remember---my name is Maybel Rhodes. Just fake like you're doing some work and no one will even notice that you're not me. I'm a loner, so, that'll work."
"Mhm hmm. I hear ya Maple"
"MayBEL"
"Yeah, that's what I said"
Scoff. In a smooth curvular motion, I plant my feet on the board and race to Sage's before their store closes.
As I approach, they're putting a silver key in a lock. Gah! The store closed.
"Miss Sage---"
"Gah! Don't do that!! Scaring me and sh--I mean, 'crap'. Scaring me and crap. Look kid, I'm closed right now but we open tomorrow. By then, I'll have the energy to discuss your school's anklet with you. Actually, about that. Do you have intel on where the-----"
"Yes, yes. About that, see...I lied. I didn't really get it from the school. I found it on the ground somewhere."
"'Found it on the ground somewhere' is code for 'I don't have money to pay nor do I have anything else to provide'? Am I getting warmer?"
"Look Miss Sage, I'm really sorry. Hey---look at it this way. I'm in debt to you. If you'll just help me with one teensy little thing, I'll ask my dad for some food money and will give you every cent he gives, alright?"
"Kid, that's not how an adult runs a business. Call what I gave you yesterday a 'freebie'. You're banned from the store. Good night."
Wait. "Wait" Their stride is aimed toward their silver camry. Yeah, I know a camry. Did you expect them to be riding a horse? Racist. Sage acts as though they don't hear and gets into their seat, key in ignition. One twist away before exiting the rocky parking area.
"IT SPOKE TO ME" Yup. That is how I yelled it. All caps, woke some birds up even. Just like in those Loony Toon cartoons. Is that why they're called "Loony Toons" 'cause they're loony cart----
Now they exit their car, slamming the heavy metal door. "What did you say? It...SPOKE...to you? What do you mean 'it'?"
Mhm Mhm. Just prepping my throat. "I wore it on my ankle and I heard a voice that has never existed before in the chasms----"
"Stop the theatrics"
"....Chasms of my mind. It was a male. Around your age in old-timey-ness."
"Har har."
"But it's the truth!" Why won't they believe a magical voice but insist that sage, a random plant, purifies the air?
Their chest contracts and expands in a sigh. Sage closes their eyes for a second. I could practically smell the gears turning. Need some WD-40, really. "Fine. Come by the store Saturday. That way, no one will be in to eavesdrop."
"Deal!"
"And bring actual MULA this time or else we won't have our little discussion". Crud.
"...."
"What are you thinking Sage?" No response. I paid one hundred fifty dollars for this after BEGGING both my folks (who think I'm using it to enroll in some after school sport) to slide me some cash so that I can 'better myself as an individual and actually do something with my time as well'. Lies are no good.
"Shh! Let me think, please!" Sage subverts their attention from me back onto the tarot cards laid in front of them----exactly where the bone anklet (bonklet) lay in silence
Ten minutes pass before Sage gives me the break down. "So, as I've said before. The anklet carries some heavy energy, something similar to passion and justice. Very potent stuff. That's what the spirit realm is saying, anyway. When you were---ahem--- HIGH----"
At this point I look away
"...You honed into that energy and that's why you heard the voice"
"Hm. So, how do I hone in on that energy now? Is it something I can control conscious?"
"Look, I dunno kid. Just, be safe. Meditate beforehand so that you are actually able to chime into the anklet's power source. Don't want to darken the talisman's power or anything."
"Sure, sure" I am literally out the door before Sage utters the second part of their sentence. I buzz with excitement at the opportunity and the best part is? I'm basically a super! Hoo ho. This is awesome.
There's an empty industrial facility near by Hawesome Li Cosmetics. It went bankrupt several decads ago. I'm pretty much the only one who knows about the place. Excellent ground to skate on---smooth as butter. Either way, it's empty and no harm will come to anything or anyone nearby. Any damage that I do will be to the building nearby, which no one cares about anyway. "So, it's just me and you buddy." Blunt in hand, I blaze it up. "Time for the magic to happen."
It's a slow high. The high takes as long as a flame reaching the wooden stick of an incense rod for the high to hit. Upwards of thirty minutes. So I wait. It feels like time warps. So I meditate. So I clear my thinking and reach out to the anklet.
"Mhm, Anklet, tell me who you are?"
"What?? You can hear me?"
"Yeah man. Who are you, why you speaking to me?"
"Why would I tell you? I don't even know yer name"
Tiring. It's like talking to a wall.
"Hey, I heard that!"
"Maybel. My name's Maybel. What's yours? Let's start there."
"Nat."
"Like Nat Turner? The rebel slave?"
"Don't know who that is, this 'Nat Turner'. Just knew my master gave me the name." How progressive. "So...I suspect that I'm dead."
It's not easy news. I get it. But hey, the north won. That's something, right?
"Well, I guess it is....you know, I had a name before all of this...."
"......"
"......??"
"......."
So, are you going to tell me?
"You may call me 'Asim'."
"I'll call you Ase."
Don't call me 'Ase'. Too late, Ase. Hey, how old are you anyway? 12? 11? My name is ASIM, nothing else. Fine, grumpy. ASIM. I'll call you Asim, Asim. Where'd that name come from anyway? What does it mean?
"Let's find out, shall we?"
"...It feels electric! (Boogy woogy woogy). Such power, this wade in...glory."
Are you a God?
"Blasphemy!" Then what are you? How are you able to lay such energy unto me?
Look, I don't know either, alright? But what I do know is...we're both negr---
Black. We don't say that word anymore.
"Black, then... Perhaps I'm connected with you due to our shared skin?" We stopped being related millenia ago. Millenia? Not familar with that word.
"Long, long ago. We don't share any common ancestors. It was all a lie." A lie? You don't believe in a God? I'm moreso spiritual; creation is a possibility not something I'm invested in. I believe in forces of the universe. "But not a God? So, this can't be some spiritual connection. We're too different." So perhaps a soul connection? A link between our spirits.... What else do we have in common? A slave and a black kid?
"Hatred of the white man? Wanting justice against them?"
"War. Destruction"
"Yes."
"No, I don't want that. I'd prefer peace." There may be no PEACE without WAR.
"A lie. Violence is not the answer. Kindness is."
"'Kindness' doesn't resolve problems. 'Kindness' doesn't end racism. 'KINDNESS' was the one that slept at my feet while I was lashed! "
"..."
Asim?
"..."
Andddd you're gone. Great. Well, I'm going to head back home, then. We can hang out again tomorrow. "Head back" means leave. All right, see you.
#fiction#original story#writer#writing#tumblr#writers on tumblr#BLM#Politics#Teenagedom#Teen angst#superhero#comicbook writing
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Uhm??????? Unacceptable?? Please tell me more about your OCs in that last art? I demand it? I want a full report on my desk before morning? Cite your sources please?
Oh no,, you’re asking,,, about my own faves,,, sorry to everyone, but I guess im never going to shut up ever now. (i already don’t shut up ever, what have u done, im now going to speak so much that society will collapse AT LEAST)
But for real. I enjoy pretending I don’t have faves, I love all my kids the same, buT WE ALL KNO THAT’S A LIE, those two my fave bitches (they snatched that title from the last two faves, rip to them, and they also snatched, n I must really make that clear, the title of “the bitches with the most AUs from the previous previous faves. Their power.)
SO. Get ready for a ride, table of content: them, their respective character, their story, and the pLETHORA OF ALTERNATE STORIES I GAVE THEM because i must yell about all the versions of my kids i have (non-exhaustive cause its that serious bro, but ill take extra time for the universe depicted in that art just for u bby). (tbh if clamp is allowed to sprinkle their fave gays in all their universes so am i, except they aint secondary characters there, every story is just theirs. love that concept.)(itll be so long you’re getting a whole novel even if i have to post it in two posts)
So~ Em twos. Dari n Wei-wei as I call em, or Dumbass n Egg if you wanna get friendly.
They’re my proudest instance of “oops i made a squad of characters, and two of them just accidentally were so perfectly compatible and complementary oh no I guess they’re in love now.” And then they became my favourite. Cause I guess their potential was too much (jk its bc they hot)
cuties.
I spent ten minutes wondering which to introduce first cause dang son, I want to talk bout them both so much shefjgfdg
First, as I technically designed him first (like ten minutes before the other), my man weiwei. if u ever saw my art its impossible that you havent seen him at least once. cause i’m legit always drawing him. cause im in love bro.
Demonstration : here are my computer scribbled weiweis of 2020 so far (with a few daris there n there they’re a package deal), that i could find, and they do not include all the paper sketches that i’m too lazy to take pics of. (i just been drawing him with so much hair these days that’s illegal, his brand is baldness)
But anyway, he’s CHEN Chia-Wei, he’s 21, he’s Taiwanese n I love him. Two very important facets of his character when you meet him: he doesn’t talk, and is absolutely, in every single dimension, built to make you fall head over heels for him.
He’s (in the “canon” storyline if i may call it that since it’s def not my most developed one but oh well) an art student, mostly paints but is also great at photography and videography (his vibe is busy hectic pieces with strong bold colours, lots of harsh edges, and very people focused).
Aside from that, he’s also super into fashion, and because he’s part of the rich boy squad (the “im broke so im giving half my characters wealth in compensation) he Can and Does exhibit some quite funky fits when he feels like it. (maybe a reason I draw him a lot, since my fave thing is pretty boys in weird ass clothes)(and then i also draw him in just casual shit cuz tittiful men in plain white tees you know. there’s just something about it.)
Small compilation of outfits. ft me and my band handwriting roasting outfits that id also kill to own but ok u know.
He digs music. (i make playlists for my OCs and i gotta say, his is the best one, i spent so many hours researching it, “arranging” it etc n its still a work in progress but dude. she got many moods my fave part is when it suddenly turns into so many cheesy ballads also she’s enormous cause im as wordy in playlists as I am in writing.) listens to a lot, n also he can play piano n guitar. cause you know. heartthrobs got to win your heart with a song (and if he’s alone he can even mumble some songs, who knows maybe even sing em softly, definitly a sight to stumble on accidentally). Big main artists that have his vibes are Hello Nico, No Party for Cao Dong, n Circa Waves’s “what’s it like over there” album.
He does a lot of sports. He ain’t fit through magic, rip to him. He’s got a serious routine, and it’s a time he likes to use alone, cause nothing like running at the break of dawn, alone with your thoughts, which you can just easily forget through the exhaustion of a workout session afterwards.
he also eats. A lot. Food is just good, bro. (the canon story is def happening some place europe aka his biggest struggle is how expensive food is here. outrageous.)
He secretly loves super cheesy movies. the dramatic romcoms??? the cute shows that are just so cute and worriless?? anything involving soulmates??? yeh dude. he watches it, he reads it, he listens to it, and he may cry about it, but no one will know. That’s the one true guilty pleasure. (and he definitly has a collection of romance dvds, books n manhuas in his old room back at the family home. where no one can see it. perks of studying abroad. no one can see ur hoarding of material that clashes your image. “yes i watch edgy experimental things haha yes i love those smart people movies of course wow the philosophy…” and then immediatly goes to watch the trashiest predictable but oh so sweet dramas all night)
While he doesn’t speak (as in with the mouth) he can communicate in a bunch of language, due to having moved around quite a bit. On top of his native mandarin and hokkien, he’s fluent in English, so he can use those to write, and is also fluent in TSL, and pretty good in HKSL (and from that, other close-in-syntax sign languages). So he doesn’t have trouble getting around, but then he is also overall quiet in public (with close friends and over text though, that’s another story, that’s where he gets chattier, and also where you may get more of his true personality). Also, he can speak with his sister. That’s pretty cool bro.
I was going to say he’s a very “hides his true colours under a shell” type of character but you know, for an egg character, that’s pretty ironic. We love poetic cinema.
He presents himself as a very laid back, chill detached dude, going with the flow and all that great stuff, and masterfully mixes just the right doses of mysterious, flirty and calm to just go around vibing. But ain’t that jUST THE MILLENIAL’S ILLNESS, those dANG KIDS, going around, gettin relationships but never intimacy 👏😢 (there’s more to it dont leave)
First of all, before you see the Drama, the Turmoil, the first thing you notice when you really do befriend him is that he’s c h i l d i s h, he gets sulky when things dont go following the plan, he gets whiny n jealous for not getting attention , he gets competitive over stupid challenges, and way too playful if you start teasing, and when he gets flustered too…you think you get cool stoic dude but actually you get a dude who’s reacting to things with way too much intensity, and boi i thought u were gon be mature what’s that why have you been pouting for three days over losing a bet come on- That’s mostly coming up when he interacts with his sister, but the closest you are to him to more of it you get to see.
He’s also an affectionate dude actually. Like physically. As in you’ll get spontaneous hugs. He’s come nap on your shoulder. That’s a perk of befriending him if you ask me.
Also he tries to look so cool, so tough haha. He’s actually a lil sensitiv boi. he gets fluffy, he gets flustered, he heart eyes. you turn around and he’s gazing at ya as if you were the whole universe. he gets a mini crisis for holding hands with his crush. ya know. he’s secretly a softie.
nerd.
Then in the “what he doesn’t show” (my fave part), where you stock all the anxieties, all the trauma… Obviously there’s a lot of anxiety here (selective muteness being a symptom of it, he hides the other ones very well) mostly fear of inadequacy, of abandonement and of loneliness. mmmmmmmaybe that’s why he was v reticent to continue pursuing that one guy he was into when he realised he was just a tad too into him oh no is that some,, like?? some lovey-love?? cant have that im afraid of gettin heartbroken bro. Aint that sad for a someone who’s one true goal is just findin someone to love and to be with forever, the struggles of yearnin for a soulmate when there’s nothing you fear more than getting attached to a person and letting them see you and your flaws.., delicious.
Now tho (because its so alone speaking about a character on their own and i just wanna get to the part where i can speak bout em together and how they bring out bits of each others ya kno, the good kush….), Dari…
He’s pretty, i must say, and got the funniest hair to draw, and comes from the most opposite background to weiwei’s.
Darian Andriev PARVANOV, also 21, comes from the remote Bulgarian countryside, but i still love him (this makes it sound as if i wouldnt normally love someone from the bulgarian countryside. its not what i meant. by default ud remind me of my son so you’d start being liked if u came from the bulgarian countryside) Now for the first instance of “wow, the complementarity”. The first thing i thought making Dari was that he looked too cool, and that he obviously was a dumbass, and mostly that he was physically unable to shut up. (o fuck he’s me)
best picture i could find of him. He’s got the dilemma of “wow he looked so pretty n cool until he opened his mouth”
He’s ALSO an art student (cause they were initially created for the purpose of filling the gap of “i have ocs in every field except the one i sorta know that’s so stupid”), painting major (def vibes differently than weiwei though, he’s doing those soft pretty landscapes n flowers, everything real pretty and peaceful, we got some impressionism nerd in here folks).
He was/is a real country boy, farm family, he helped tend the fields, he worked in plantations for pocket money, he knows how to take care of cattle and chicken and goats and all the cool babies you can take care of, he can tell whether the soil is good or not, he can drive a tractor, and doesnt fear dirt.
but then also he’s kind of a neat freak, he hates getting paint on himself, so the duality of man, dirt ok but paint? disgostin. his spaces are real neat and spotless, he likes cleaning (its relaxing) and does it nearly too often.
his dumbassery comes from lack of common sense and impulsiveness, aside from that he’s actually what you’d call “mad smart”, dude had em good grades, he can memorise pages upon pages of the most trivial information, he has an accumulation of knowledge beyond limits, and is good at problem solving. so he can recite all the words of the F letter of the dictionnary, but would also put a curling iron in his mouth to see if it would curl his tongue. (side note, he does have a problem with heat n fire, most his ��oopsie how i wound up hurting myself on acccident” story involve burning -that stove was just too tempting…)
while he doesnt feel very attached to his home country, he does feel strongly for his family. he’d do anything for his mum (and actually does everything to make her proud already, that’s his one main goal), and he’s ready to sacrifice a lot for her (as in, spend years working non-stop a really uncomfortable job so his mother wouldnt have to pay a cent of his expenses even though she said she could by doing some sacrifices herself,and then being ready to come back as soon as needed if anything happened, and potentially drop his career and dream n go back to the farm life to provide for mama)(also he still does hold onto some parts of his home country’s traditions, and does sometimes feel homesick but more in a ‘i left the most beautiful landscapes n the city feels cramped and claustrophobic and i dont know people and i dont feel in the right place cuz im a forreigner with a thicc accent who doesnt master the language of this place and straight up have different body language communicators due to cultural difference oh lord i wanna be home where a nod means no and a head shake is yes i keep misunderstanding everything”)
if you want background noise he’s the perfect pal to call over, he’s just so chatty, he got hours and hours of non stop speech ready for you. you can shut him up once you’re done listening with the offering of food. works everytime.
he’s definitly not shy. neither in terms of talking to people, nor when it comes to making decisions. he’s quite bold, and rarely hesitates to go towards something he wants. he’s direct in his approach to most everything.
he likes partying. mostly the socialising part, talkin to people is just fun ya feel. and being in the crowd, doing whatever, pressure free? ya can dance n enjoy yourself, and people wont notice? yeah that’s nice. but doesnt do it super often cause broke bitches aint got the party time n budget.
he likes arm. (just an excuse for me to drop this thing here cuz i like it)
While he’s an overall bubbly looking character, with a cheery loud personnality, he does carry some youth trauma that has him more reticent to engage in happiness, he comes from what you could call “not the wokest background” and he may have fallen victim of it : he’s kind of a flashy noticeable character, both physically and in his personnality, and doesnt exactly matches the expectations of dudes in the area he comes from (delicate, emotional and sweet guy? that doesnt exist bro). He went through it, and it has definitly had some impact on his confidence in many aspects. But he’s 100% the type of guy to put on the fake happy front because if feeling bad is sad, making the people you care about sad for you too is Unacceptable Right??? relying on friends?? what???
But then what are we supposed to be doing with such charming characters huh,,,
Make them fall in love obviously.
Their story obviously has to do with falling in love and workin a relationship cause if I dont write romance i literally die, but I make the center pivot of all of it communication, and barriers in communications. Most obvious being them coming from wildly different cultures, having different native languages, and also the ways you adapt to muteness (what i love most bout that part is even then they fucked up given the easiest quickest small body language things to communicate are head nods n then i managed to make one come from the one country that reverses those like iconic how do they even understand each other -through a lot of work and love bro) but also on more “introspective” points, how to say things that you are even afraid to think about, how to open up and share your burdens and trauma with someone, how to say words you’ve been convinced you weren’t allowed to, the inner turmoil of communication in short. And then also communication through art, and through alternative unusual ways. If i were snobbish i could call it something like “a thinkpieces on how humans overcome obstacles in communication, and adapt, all for the sake of pursuing love” but fact is its mostly boys being in love n learning how to speak, figuratively and also quite literally. And also its me having fun with making characters evolve from each other, be able to influence each other for the better, helping each other be more comfortable with themselves and express the true things of their personnality, and discover new aspects. I just wanna write intense and soulful love bro.
So in less concept and more facts, weiwei meets dari, dari being his puppy self just immediatly strikes a conversation and weiwei gets interested cause “oho nice pretty boy? very good. i want some of that”. they get closer because you cant fight off the Power of friendship (and also the power of “what your friend is bestie with my friend?? guess we hanging out”) and then friendship and interest turns into pining, held back by respective dread of what romance with the other would mean (as in “romance?? cant have that we cant feel” and “with him?? cant do that, convince yourself he’s just a friend immediatly what would the family think”) but eventually they do have to just crash into one another cause that’s just the gravitational pull bro, its physics bro. and from then on its all unlearning destructive behaviours, bettering oneself with the help of the other, and getting over trauma to finally live ur best life. and gettin fckin married bro they’re both cheeseballs theyll wanna wed
BUT MAKING EM FALL IN LOVE ONCE ISNT ENOUGH time to make 3894853 alternate universes about em.
Lets speak bout my fave of those for a hot second.
First of all, the one of the art that brought this ask, guess i could call it “Pretty Tribes” AU, bunch of tribes live and do their things, having nature and energy powers. Dari n Weiwei’s tribes are bros, the latter’s powers needing them to move around to get energy from different places, enabling them different abilities. So basically they get to hang at the other’s place while the regenerate energy from there, and in exchange they help them out with various tasks (dari’s tribe is a rly farmer oriented one, with plant magic, while weiwei’s got more poyvalent powers, and have very good healers notably, so it comes in handy). The two boys were born a few months apart in their respective tribes, so naturally, anything the two clans meet, they’re put together to play and all, and from that they became besties, and each time they meet, after the gaps of time separating the two groups, they feel more and more of a little something else~ story is themed round growing up, friendship between clans, their traditions and cultures, and pretty boys in pretty clothes in pretty landscapes interacting with nature.
The superpower AU, i fuckin love it bro. Its an old one, made for other characters, but i just love it so much that i had to inject my faves in it. Its got a grimy ugly setting, bad government, propaganda, and fights between super-people (heavily mediatised for entertainment and reinforcing the idea that “look at these evil villains thank god us the good government protects you from them”), with a side of bad ethics in science. In all that, those two have the role of “those two young enemy warrior and villain, they were so powerful and fought so hard”, public figures, legendary and admired by both sides, everyone followed their fights, til one day they presumably died in one of their showdowns. (haha sike they actually found themselves talking for 5 seconds and realised they lived in a society, n built a plan to run away). The main characters get to find they’re alive because one of em had history with super-warrior-golden-boy and go to seek their help to overthrow the Big Bads. (stealing them from their nice gay cottage hermit life smh so rude)
Mermaids. I like those. Sailor weiwei sees merman dari, they both save each other in different occasions, they grow fascinated with each other, they’re at sea, water romance. Amazing. AU made half cuz i just like water n fish. and shirtless sailors.
(i couldnt find art of it in five minutes so have a link to that lil animatic piece i made of it once)
Indie band AU, where i was listening to songs that vibe so well with those two in general n then my brain was like “what if they’re the ones playing”. They’re (along with the rest of the art squad) a nice little alternative rock band, doing their thing, then one of their songs blows up, and they get quite the attention, to the dismay of dari who wrote that song in a moment of “oh no im so in love with my bandmate but i cant tell him what if i ruin everything we have going on ill just have to love from afar and deal with that” and now has way too many people interested in who he wrote it about and theorising from his every move when performing it (a mix of music, secret crushes and social media) (ft a picture of neither of them but its the least ugly art i found of this AU cuz its old and instruments are the bane of my existence)(also kelana is so pretty i gotta flaunt her around)
in kind of the same vibe, as in we’re in a music world overexposed to social media, i also integrated em to an AU i did for fun, “boyband AU” as its called aka idol based band system cuz you kno, i got a hobby, lets apply it. Band boy Dari and bodyguard Weiwei got a thing going on, but can’t really act on it in any way, because they’d just destroy the whole band if it ever came public. Featuring annoying bandmates, catchy pop songs and people making fanaccounts of that one hot Mr.Bodyguard cause dang he hot.
(all the art of this one so ugly im sorry)
SPY AU, one of my fave brand. They spies, they get assigned on the same mission, they work real nice with each other. spies hot. fights. strategy. i just like the concept. Gays taking down the worst traffics imaginable??? I love that song.(i actually have so much on this cause s p i e s are fuckin great)
Fashion. U kNOW i have an AU for fashion. Supermodel and his private stylist, trying to maintain the line of professionalism. And failing to do so. Lets make out in unpractical designer clothes.
Have an highschool AU for a bunch of characters, injected them as “spinoff”, start chatting online being art buddies, fall in love without meeting (ft. all the iconics of internet friendship like knowing tiny details of their personnalities but not the fact that they have a sister or “waIT ur a GUY i thought u were a girl wow wild good news for my gay ass”)
n those are my faves as far as i remember, i got a fuckton of small other ones that arent fleshed out enough, or some that are more of a guilty pleasure universe, and some that are more like “projects that i can expend on as soon as i run out of daydream material” (like u kno those hospital drama shows with super innacurate medicine n shit like idk scrubs or whatever, yeh i want some of that but im keeping it for later)
#thats way less talk than i thought id do#prolly bc i wrote half of it when it was between midnight and one AM#wait no it was 2 am#but ye#sry if shit messy af#those two are my faves tho n talkin bout em on the spot is hard cuz my brain is screaming about everything bout em at once#if u wanna get more info on em do ask i love them so much n i feel i didnt do em justice here cuz speaking is a fraud words dont exist#im glad they caught ur interest tho#nothin more gratifyin than not being the only bitch who likes his own children
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another tag game
tagged by my cool pal!! @simending fanks julian!
dogs or cats? birds. youtube celebrities or normal celebrities? wlw tiktokers gsjndjgDSNGS ehem... luv u silly_oldbear on tiktok let me wife u Ehem. If you could live anywhere where would that be? uhhhh i kind of like where i live now tbh lol disney or dreamworks? dreamworks. i love disney movies but FUCK DISNEY y’allllllll favorite childhood tv show(s)? TMNT, power puff girls, kim possible, uhh? other stuffs. OH good game spawn point, baby the movie you’re looking forward to most in 2020? dolittle lol, but idk but idk, i havent had time to look @ movie releases and stuff favorite book you read in 2019? this year kind of sucked reading wise so…nothing marvel or DC? marvel... am no’ a reprobate If you choose marvel, favorite member of the x-men? if you choose dc, favorite justice league member? LISTEN. I DONT CARE IF MAGNETO ISNT TECHNICALLY AN X-MAN ANYMORE LIKE IN THE GROUP BUT HE’S MY FAV IDC IDC DONT COME FOR ME night or day? day. BRO i aint stay awake past 10pm favorite pokémon? piplup... he’s just a littol creature.. top 5 bands: the paper kites, m&s, the lumineers, fleet foxes, fall out boy, and like a ton otherss that dont fit in 5 top 10 books: the fellowship of the ring, the two towers, the return of the king, the hobbit, the silmarillion. trc. SIX OF CROWS. ANYTHING BY LEIGH BARDUGO I OWE YOU MY LIFE WOMAN!! ID TAKE A BULLET FOR YOU!! the secret history. the song of achilles. darius the great is not okay. AND SO MANY MOOOORREEE ok WAIT i know it says 10 but... imma make it 11 bc.. wicked saints by emily a. duncan ? i love u baby. ok wait no 12 bc im trying to write somethnign write now and whilst the bones of it arent that good i love my characters so IDC! top 4 movies: lord of the rings, + the hobbit (count all the movies as one coward! i need it to be like that for Purposes). spotlight. um. pirates of the carribean LMAO. ANT MAN america or europe? america FUCK europe LMAO tumblr or twitter? instagram baby ehem follow my gay insta @/goblinwlw ;))) pro-choice or pro-life? pro-choice, am not a moron ladies favorite youtuber: fuck them youtubers honestly yall (n’aw kurtis conner maybe!!) favorite author? LEIGH BARDUGO BUT ALSO TOLKIEN Tea or coffee? tea! coffee is for bastards and i have a DAD sorry OTP? none of u are gonna understand this since its from my book. but ellis and jamison... wuv u!! ok but Alternatively. kaz brekker and happiness thanks. ALSO mattias helvar and um. being alive i love u baby boy do you play an instrument/sing? im classically trained vocally so i can kinda sing but i havent like. actually dedicated myself to singing in AGES so ! im not really good anymore
tagging @llovvi , @floraiio !
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Past Life, Possible Life
One of my MySpace posts, from May, 2006
I've just finished reading a new edition of Paul Sabatier's biography of Francis of Assisi.
It was a tearful read at the end. I suppose it's because it represents, in its poignant prose, the possibilities of the life I did not have. It's 20 years since I first seriously enquired about becoming a Friar, and 19 since I actually went to the novitiate. Hell, it's nearly 14 years since I left... Strangely enough, Jason dumped me 9 years to the day after the Friars did the very same thing.
I never did like Anthony of Padua - boy did he get his own back! [I left on his feast day - author’s note]
Anyway, reading Sabatier's book, I was as moved as ever by the life of the Little Poor Man, and chastened, too. I was a worthwhile Friar, I believe, and was happy in the life. I used to say that as long as we loved one another, we could sleep under hedge rows. I don't think it fanciful or romantic - I think we could have. That band of brothers made many things possible by their unconditional commitment, one to another. Others saw it, that's why they chose to be with us, to spend time with us and to be so generous and openhanded in their appreciation for what they found among us. But, in the end, it was not to be. The gay thing was an insuperable obstacle to the Minister Provincial, God help him. Aint that a kick in the head? as the song has it.
And so I am now Joe Soap, Learning Disability Nurse and boon time companion. It's a tougher station than the Friars, I think.
It's a tougher station making your way in the world, treading lightly upon the ground, and embracing others with respect, warmth, openness and affection. I love my family but I do not experience the shelter and immediacy in those relationships that I did with the Friars. Sometimes it seems as if the modern world has canonised singularity (which is radically different from respecting individuality) and it exerts a subtle pressure that pushes us each into our several corners. Only love impels us to reach out from there and make those connections so vital to our humanity. The antarctic can be a cold place, says the solitary penguin.
It's not so easy to have less when you can't have the use of stuff you don't already own. I suppose my attitude to property is a continuing theme from Friary days - I value the use of things but see no virtue in owning stuff for its own sake. Hence the continual recycling of books and stuff to charity shops, and the simplification of the flat in its final dispensation. William Morris had the same notion: have nothing in your house that is not either useful nor beautiful. And I'd add - and don' t have alot of it!!
So, having finished the book and sifted my life, and found it a bit lightweight in some respects, I took my sorry ass off to the garden centre where I bought stawberry plants and geraniums. Useful and beautiful enough I think?
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rereading aftg with my dumbass opinions pt. 2 (tfc chapters 6-10)
pt. 1 | pt. 2 | pt. 3
look guys! its the highly unanticipated continuation of my reread of aftg!
chapter 6 (aka. meet this MESS of a team)
“My mother's family is French." It was a lie that probably had his British mother rolling over in her sandy grave.”
neil really never misses an opportunity to remind readers that he fucking buried his mom on the beach huh?
“A liar who practices occasional honesty. Clever. Keeps people guessing. Very effective. I would know. I do it myself, you see. Come on, then. After you.”
have i mentioned how entertaining high andrew is? because he’s funny as hell
also rereading these are fun because Nora is incredible at foreshadowing just sayin
“Neil automatically reached for his seatbelt, but one of the brothers was sitting on it.”
how neil would be in the back of the cousins’ car if they let him:
“You?" Neil said. "You can't." Andrew's smile curved wider. "Ohhh, that sounds like a challenge. Mother may I?" "Your mother's dead. I don't think she cares what you do.”
HO HO HOLY SHIT NEIL
“Starting a fight was too out of character for who he portrayed "Neil” to be, though.”
“Consider this your official invite, you suicidal wretch. I'm bringing you to Columbia with us this Friday.”
awe suicidal wretch... glad they’re starting those pet names early
“I don't drink or dance," Neil said.
andrew: i kno u can
“Kevin doesn't dance anymore”
anymore? ANYMORE??? release the cursed events that led to him not dancing anymore Nora im begging you
“Are you bleeding anywhere?" Matt asked. "Nowhere vital," Neil said.
gskjgnsak god i stan this little asshole so much
“She said it gently, with the hint of a smile on her face, but Neil still felt the rebuke. It was subtler but somehow deadlier”
have i mentioned how gay i am for renee? because im very gay for renee
“Allison looked ready for a photo shoot with perfect platinum curls, spiked heels, and a skintight dress.”
im also gay for allison ngl
“I can move if you want to sit here," Neil said. "No, this is fine." She smiled, but it had a smug edge to it, probably because Seth was glaring at them like he could kill them with willpower alone. ”
lol remember how neil doesn’t think he’s attractive and yet in 0.1 seconds after meeting him allison is like “yes this idiot is hot enough to piss off the other idiot im dating”
“Personal favorite was when someone told the police we were running a meth lab out of the dorm," Dan said sourly. "Police raids are awesome.”
no offence dan but that’s fucking hilarious omg
that’s kind of like the time my residence floor had to get evacuated bc some kids hotboxed their dorm room
god i love uni
“The death threats were creative, though," Nicky said. "Maybe this time they'll follow through and actually kill one of us. Let's vote. I nominate Seth.”
pfffffttttt i love Nicky omg
also hahahahahah foreshadowing!
“It'll be fine," Andrew said. "I promised, didn't I? Don't you believe me?" It took a while, but at last Kevin visibly relaxed. ”
again this is why i thought they were fucking for like the better part of the first two books
“The dead look Kevin turned on Andrew today was the same look Neil saw in his reflection. When Neil stopped acting, when he stopped worrying about who was watching, when he let go of the lies that kept him alive, that was the only expression he could make.”
it’s fine i didnt need a heart anyways
this kid is 18 hes A BABY
the first time i read this i was 18 too and like jfc i was a BABY at 18 and so i neil
“One of us has to make it, Mom." It wasn't going to be Neil. It was obvious he was too stupid to survive without his mother if he let himself get into messes like this. But maybe Kevin could do it.”
sorry let me just wipe my TEARS off my fucking laptop neil honey what the fuck
“He felt distant as he watched them walk in. Maybe he was already dying, his stupid soul fading from his short body in preparation for a brutal end.”
neil we get it you have depression (me too bitch u aint special)
“Fuck running," Seth said.
now that’s a whole ass mood
“he didn't know how Renee could smile so warmly when she was speaking to Andrew.”
haha bitch just wait
“when he slept, he dreamed of his father waiting for him on the Foxhole Court.”
remember how at the end of the series his father is waiting on the court but neil wins??? god we love good storytelling
this is such a fucking wild chapter
could you imagine? coming back from the summer and your first introduction to this amateur from arizona is this neil josten level of sass? because i’d probably kill him
first years are bad enough but first years who dont care about other people’s opinions? the fucking worst
chapter 7 (aka. neil does NOT have a fun night out)
“It seemed Allison and Seth didn't believe in middle ground: either they were slinging vile insults at each other or they were making out in the locker room regardless of whoever might be around.”
that’s just how the straights are
“It reminded Neil a little of Allison and Seth, except without the desperate sexual undertones.”
i’ll just leave this gem of a line here
“His teammates held so little regard for him he didn't even have the dubious honor of being dead last.”
neil shading himself is actually hilarious how relatable
“Neil watched him do it, trying to remember the last time someone gave him a gift and coming up blank. That his first one should be from Andrew was unsettling.”
i actually love the fact that andrew bought him clothes so early on like andrew your gay is showing
“Neil debated how much damage the thick heels of his new boots would do against Andrew's face and liked what his mind came up with.”
i thank god everyday that these books are neil’s pov
“Andrew gave Neil another slow once-over and let go. "We're going.”
^andrew seeing neil w/o contacts (aka. the ‘i can’t think straight’ vine)
“Most of the men wore leather, half the women had corsets, and a good number of both genders were covered in buckles and chains.”
this... is a... gay bar
“Andrew saluted the bouncers on his way by and led the way into the club, bypassing the line entirely.”
i always forget the drinking age in the us is 21 but like this bar really dont care about their liquor license AT ALL lmao
“You think Kevin would risk his future over a night out at the club?" "What future?" Neil asked.”
WOW NEIL WAY TO BE A BITCH
“Neil hadn't seen Aaron get up, but he was waiting behind Neil when Andrew let go. Neil reached for Andrew with lethal intent, but Aaron grabbed the back of his chair and pulled hard enough to topple it over.”
why are the twins literally this gif:
real talk nicky kissing neil like that is horrible and really reflects poorly on nicky as a character
andrew for this entire chapter:
chapter 8 (aka. a hitchhiker’s guide to lying about your identity)
“I don't know how your conversation with Andrew went, but it didn't end well. Rumor has it you paid a busboy a hundred bucks to knock you out. Way to cut our night short.”
this is probably my favourite thing neil does in the entire series ngl
“Wymack grabbed his elbow and hauled him inside. He slowed just long enough to slam the door behind Neil. "Are you stupid or just crazy? Do you have any idea what could have happened to you between here and there? What were you thinking?”
Why does Wymack literally sound like my father?
foxes: daddy?
wymack: DO I LOOK LIKE
follow up:
kevin: daddy?
wymack: uh yeah
“I don't know what the beef is between you two, but it ends here and now.”
Wymack @ neil: tell your boyfriend, if he says he’s got beef that your a vegetarian and your not fucking scared of him
“Then correct me." "Give me a reason." "Besides the obvious?" Andrew said. "If I can't get an answer from you, I'll get it wherever I can.”
andrew:
“I'm—" Neil didn't want to say it, but the word was already there, broken and pathetic between them, "—nothing. I'll always have and be nothing.”
“He wondered for a moment if Andrew could handle the entire truth so calmly, but that was too dangerous and stupid to consider.”
“Hope was a dangerous, disquieting thing, but he thought perhaps he liked it.”
this is such a good fucking line like i am shooketh
chapter 9 (aka. neil is, like, really horny for exy)
“Are you stupid?" Seth asked. "Yeah," Neil said.”
what a fuckin MOOD
“Neil had almost forgotten why he liked Exy so much. He did his best at practices but these days he worked mostly to keep his teammates off his back. As Neil surveyed Kevin's damage, he finally felt inspired again. On its heels was a hungry, desperate rush.”
“Seth made as if to throw his beer at Neil. "His life is not more important than mine just because he's more talented.”
sometimes i really wish seth was actually given a chance to have some character development
“ "Maybe you're not as stupid as I thought." "Maybe I am," Neil said”
another big fucking MOOD
chapter 10 (aka. shocking: university is hard :/ )
“It's fun telling Kevin no," Andrew said with a wicked grin.”
why is andrew like this omg
betsy probably was like just looking for a chill job and was like “oh cool uni students? ill have to deal with like a lot of anxiety, sexual tension, depression and like confusion about the future, not to bad” but NOPE welcome to the fucking MAFIA WARS
“That wasn't so bad, was it? Andrew was convinced it would be a disaster. He put money on you hating Betsy." "Did you bet against him?" "Yes," Renee said. "It was a private bet between the two of us.”
“I hope you didn't lose much," Neil said.”
god why is he such an asshole at every opportunity i love him
“I can take care of myself," Neil said. "Watch me beam with pride.”
wymack is the best father in the world and you cant convince me otherwise
“There was one for every fall team with schedules printed on each. Neil kept the Exy one, tossed the rest into the trash, and buried his magnet deep in his pocket where he didn't have to look at the dates.”
neil “i only care about exy” josten strikes again with his great school spirit
“Palmetto State was facing Edgar Allan on Friday, October 13th”
that’s such a cliche and i love it
“He detoured around students toward one of Palmetto State's three dining halls. Two were for the general student body. The third was for athletes only”
lmao my school literally has one dining hall and it couldnt give less of a fuck what type of student they’re selling food too as long as they’ll pay $15 for chicken fingers
what kind of money does palmetto state fuckin have
like i get us tuition is a lot but jesus so’s mine and my school couldn’t be less fucked
“It was only the first day of school and he already had three assignments: a short paper, a fifty-page chapter to read, and a page of questions about said chapter. Neil debated for a minute as to which one sounded least painful. Five minutes later he was still uninspired, so he put his head down on his desk.”
1. MOOD
2. first years are so cute thinking that’s a lot of assignments i remember in first year being like “i have to read 40 pages thats so unfair :(” and now i’m like “ah sick only 200 pgs of readings this week? im gonna have so much free time!”
upper year history sucks ngl
“I'm fine," Neil said.”
neil knows exactly two (2) words and those are it
“You say that an awful lot," Matt said. "I'm starting to think you don't know what it means.”
overall thoughts:
the plot is pickinnnng upppp
i kind of forget how much world building happens in the first book but like its good
also i love neil literally hating everyone its so funny bc like bby these going to be your best friends just wait
anyways that’s all for now
part 3 will be the rest of tfc and then we’ll move onto trk if you guys still want more of this? let me know
love u all bye
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rating all the Skies of Arcadia characters part 3: the crew
oh my god what have i gotten myself into
Ilchymis
beautiful. underrated. legally i cannot tell you exactly what i think he is, but some of you know. probably writes fanfiction. what do you think is in that big ass book. just wants to learn things, and i support him. 10/10, he makes me riselem.
Ryu-Kan
he always wants to fight me, like on a deep spiritual level. not me-as-vyse. me, personally. what do you want from me old man,,,, 6/10 he is salty because he is always on stand-by.
Izmael
a Friend. an absolute friend. i keep asking him to make changes to Crescent Isle and by the moons he really just does it. 8/10 he is gay for Brabham.
Kirala
HONESTLY AN EVEN BIGGER FRIEND. all u gotta do is say that her work is nice (which is just the truth) and she’ll join your crew and honestly we don’t deserve her. i can always depend on her in ship battles. 9/10 she will never let the delphinus die.
Polly
she is my mo-om. she’s my mom! 7/10, boogie woogie woogie!
Urala
if polly is my mom, urala is my daughter. oh my god she’s so sweet. her food is delicious too. i mean, i assume. yafutomans cook it better sorry. 8/10 where is the chemistry between her and hans???
Moegi
i...i...sigh. the story didn’t do her justice At All, okay? i wanted to love her so much but i swear to god if she faints one more time im going to lose my marbles. feel like she was so bland and she could have been so much richer. what have you done, writers. 6/10 i am not fond of her but she is a good girl and WHERE IS THE CHEMISTRY BETWEEN HER AND ENRIQUE??????
Pinta
intimidates me. very small and goes on more adventures than i could ever dream of. i keep hearing about this so-called Quest he’s got but i am far too cowardly to explore it. 6/10 he is the most imposing goblin i have ever met, please save me.
Brabham
a nice man. he vaguely reminds me of my uncle, only with a better beard. he and izmael are an unstoppable duo. 7/10, his laugh kind of gives me the heebie-jeebies.
Hans
adorable!! and SO weird. he speaks in the third person sometimes, and i am a little bit put off. he calls me Mr. Vyse, and i don’t know how to feel about that. 8/10, has more chemistry with Vyse than with his wife.
Belle
please girl your jiggle physics. her design is VERY cute and i love that she’s a smol girl with a big gun. but like. Belle honey,,,,, 5/10 on the grounds of booby crimes.
Khazim
blowin shit up with homemade d-d-d-dynamite! now you know it’s really gonna blow! 6/10, get a load of these!
Don
he’s very patient. it took me three thousand years to go rescue him. sorry don. please don’t drink and drive. 99 bottles of loqua on the wall/10.
Lawrence
hey, i LOVE This Sulky Boy. i think about him every day. he loves Pow and i love him for it. such a cutie. 9/10 he is such a cliche and that is why we love him.
Merida
the disney princess aint got NOTHIN on our girl right here!! i am in awe of her courage and resilience.. and i love that urala taught her how to dance Yafutoman-style. 9/10 we love a bringer of joy in the face of adversity.
Pow
do i EVEN have to say anything???????? 11/10. pow.
Domingo
he stands exactly like my faves, so he must be among them. i feel bad for domingo, he always gets overlooked. over,,,lookouted............8/10 im sorry for making that pun.
Tikatika
he’s Ixa’Takan legolas. 7/10 he’s Ixa’Takan legolas.
Kalifa
hit or miss, i guess they never miss, huh. um i had a big crush on Kalifa back in the day so this rating may be a bit skewed but.................10/10 she told me couples should spend more time outside and i have never forgotten that advice.
Osman
i for real didn’t know she was a lady until last year. she terrifies me. 3/10. i am scared.
Marco
he’s a very gross little boy but i’ll never forget that first scene with him ever. when i think of Lower Valua i think of the first Marco scene and it’s a big oof. 8/10 made me love the urchin archetype.
Robinson
i deadass forgot he was a character. the amnesia is contagious. 5/10 props for surviving in the Dark Rift tho.
#holy shit theres so much#skies of arcadia#soa character ratings#zandre rambles#sorry i need to replay this game dsjfhhjksfdh
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christmas
Yes, I got a Christmas request just roll with it
“You really don’t have to go all out like this...” Ian laughed.
“But Ian, I love Christmas! I like to do all of the Christmas things,” Max explained, winding gold tinsel around Ian’s staircase. “Christmas tree, decorations, baking, presents...”
“Yeah, what next? You gonna drag me to the mall to get our picture taken with Santa?”
“Oh, Ian can we!?”
“Max! I was kidding! It’s for little kids...”
“Well, I think it would be cute....”
Ian rolled his eyes. “Doing all this Christmas stuff.... It’s stressful....”
“I don’t think so. I like it. I think all of this stuff is fun....”
“No, I think it’s fun too, it’s just....”
“It’s our first Christmas together, I just thought...” Ian frowned. Max sounded so disappointed. “You’d be as excited as I am....”
Ian loved Max, but December was just like any other month for him. But that child-like wonder in Max’s eyes as he did Christmas things, it really hurt to see that taken away. Just for Max, he would get more into the Holiday spirit. Even if it was fucking gay.
....
“Where the fuck are you taking me, cunt? And why did I need to wear a nice outfit?”
“Well... You should always wear a nice outfit...” Ian tried, driving as Max sat beside him with a raised eyebrow and crossed arms.
“You think I’m buying that one...? Aye! This is a mall! Why’d I have to get dressed nice for a mall!?”
“Max, just chill. You’ll see, okay?”
“Of all the Christmas things we could’ve done... The one thing i hate is crowded-ass malls...”
“God, Max will you just trust me!?”
....
“Oh My God, Ian! I tell you I wanna do some fun Christmas shit, and not only do you drag me to one of your big-ass crowded American malls, but you’re taking me into the bloody Wal-Mart mate!? Wal-Mart aint fun!”
Ian laughed. “I know....” He held Max’s hand as they came in through the automatic doors, partly worried he’d straight up run away if he didn’t. “Look, Max,” he continued, walking him along to their destination. “American Wal-Mart’s are fucked. They’ve got all kinds of extra shit in them... Build-A-Bear, Hair salons, portrait studio....” he smirked, walking them directly into the direction of what he’d just said.
“Ian!” Max gasped. “You booked us a... We’re gonna get a fuckin’ Christmas picture!?” He smiled, slapping Ian’s arm playfully. “That’s so fucking gay! I love it!”
Ian knew Max would like a classic American past time like family Christmas pictures. But that fucking grin as they stood against the crappy looking winter back-drop, it was the cutest thing he’d ever seen. And of course Max wanted to do every back-drop variant they had, and incorporate the shitty looking props... It was great.
“Okay, sir,” the woman said about 20 minutes later as she pulled up the pictures on the computer. “Which ones would you like to order?”
“Uhh... Just give me like 25 of these Christmas cards....”
“We’re gonna send out family Christmas cards? That’s fucking faggy! I love that!”
“Sir, please... There are children here.”
“Sorry...”
“Hey, my boyfriend’s Australian. No need to be culturally insensitive, that’s just how they talk.”
“Ian!” Max snorted out a laugh. “I am truly sorry, M’am. Hey. While we’re here, we should pick up some things.”
“What do you need? We have groceries.”
“I know. I wanted to get some shi...Stuff for baking.”
“Baking? Now, that’s pretty ga...Childish...”
“Fu-Frig off. It’s fun. I want to get some cupcake mix, and...”
“Cupcakes? Isn’t it supposed to be Christmas cookies? Ginger-bread men and all that?”
“No, I hate gingerbread. We always made Christmas cupcakes cause cupcakes are just better. And like, rice-crispy squares. That was like, a really special thing for me and I wanted to share it with you.”
“Okay, okay. We’ll bake together. Get your stuff, I’ll meet you in line...”
“Oh, Ian! You’ll love it, it’s fun! I’ll show you how to tie liquorice ‘round the rice-crispy squares to make em’ look like little presents!”
Ian smirked, shaking his head as he watched Max go off into the store. Turning back to the computer monitor, he scanned the picture selection for one where Max looked especially good. Of course, in Ian’s opinion he looked good in every single one, but he managed to pick his favourite. An adorable picture capturing that excited grin, and his shining green eyes. “Could you get this one blown up and printed on one of those canvases?” It would make a perfect gift for Max. He loved sentimental shit like this, like his hundreds of polaroids. Maybe he could get him something to organize those.... And all those Pokemon cards too, of course...
....
“Ian! These are so cute!” Max squeaked, looking over the Christmas cards in the car. “Merry Christmas, Love Ian and Max... We look so nice, too. Like a wholesome, normal couple,” he laughed. “Thanks for doing Christmas stuff with me, even if it’s not your favourite.”
“No, I want to.”
“Yeah. I can’t wait to bake with you.”
“Yeah, me too. My family never did Christmas baking or anything.... But first, I wanna show you something.”
“Alright...” Max looked out the window. The city was beautiful with all the Christmas lights set up. In the tree’s and on the light posts... He watched as Ian turned down into the business district. “What’s down here...?”
“Anderson Insurance...”
“Insurance... Fuck, Ian. That sounds really boring....”
“I know, just trust me, okay?”
“Well, alright...”
Ian pulled up to the building and parked in front. “Look, see?” he pointed to the roof of the place. Three large statues of men on camels stood atop the building. “It’s the three wise-men. This place puts them up every December, for like, 40 years.”
“Wow. That’s pretty cool....” Max admitted.
“Yeah... When I was a kid, Christmas was a really stressful time... My parents didn’t have much money, they spent a lot of the season fighting... Screaming at each other... Sometimes we had to have our Christmas dinner from a charity. Like, the Cheer Board... But some years, by the time they realized they wouldn’t have enough.... Or some bill would come up..... It would be too late to sign up. But every year, we would make sure to drive past Anderson’s to see the wise men. It was like, the one Christmas thing we could count on. And even though it’s kinda lame, I always looked forward to it.”
“Ian...” Max smiled at him. “I’m really glad you showed me this....”
“Well... You know, when you were talking about the cupcakes and how important it was to you, it just reminded me of this...”
“I love you, Ian...” Max leaned over, giving his boyfriend a peck on the cheek.
“I love you too,” Ian returned with a wet kiss on the mouth. “Merry Christmas.”
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Hehehe, puns! ^^
TG: i almost forgot i had a really short but cool dream i fugured you might like this UU: oh yes, everyone is having important dreams as we near oUr mUtUal entries. this is lovely!
I wonder if UU can clarify to Roxy who that was and what happened. She seems to know about the Beta Kids!
TG: i saw someone i think was supposed to be my daughter TG: do you know if thats true UU: can yoU describe her? TG: well she looked kinda like me TG: but in this orange getunp
Heh, it’s interesting seeing the Alphas talking about the Betas. I’ve only been with them for a short while, but it feels like they are so separate from the rest of Homestuck.
UU: she soUnds to me like the well known figUre of legend. UU: or at least, well known to those who make the stUdy of sUch matters into their all consUming pastime. ~_u UU: i believe yoU saw the seer of light
Figure of Legend? :O
God, it’s so weird! I keep forgetting how time doesn’t matter. To the infinite expanse, trillions of years have already gone by since Cascade!
TG: who this luckay fella is UU: fella? UU: what do yoU mean? TG: come on u know TG: who i get futurebusy w/2 make the lightseer babis
Ho boy... Yeah, that’s a can of worms in itself.
It’s funny she’s just so excited to one day have sex xDDD
Which makes it all the more sad.
TG: is it TG: strider TG: does he like get ungay for a while or ssuch
Ungay? ^^;;;;;;
W-well, gay people do experiment sometimes... I mean, it’s not like I haven’t considered it before...
Not that it matters, test tube babies...
TG: can aliens b gay too is that a thing TG: being space gay UU: Ummm. UU: u_u; TG: o man TG: embarrased alien is ambarrassed TG: heh sorry UU: i am not embarrassed, i jUst don't know what yoU're talking aboUt!
Okay, 99% certain she’s a troll. There’s a possibility she’s from some other bisexual race, but Hussie would be setting up a helluva red herring there is that’s the case.
TG: or is it like TG: some ectobio shit instead TG: and a dude aint really invovled
Oof, hit the nail there...
TG: maaan wouldnt that just figure TG: that would suck! whyd you have 2 go and confirm my bleak dudeless future UU: i confirmed no sUch thing, roxy!
It’s weird she just assumes she’s never going to bone ever just because her daughter is a test tube baby! ^^;
Though, it’s a fair assumption. There just won’t be that many men around, and some of her options are related.
TG: lemme just see if i have all my facts right TG: i will meet my cool as hell daughter from the future in this game UU: yes, basically. TG: and i will also meet my mother in this game
It’s going to be SO WEIRD to have Rosesprite interacting with Rose.
Then again, it’s going to be so weird when Jane meets Nannasprite.
TG: come on whats answer TG: y/n TG: or shuold i say TG: y/n/u UU: U! UU: i choose U!!! :U!!!!! TG: ahaha u luv u's UU: i do love U's!
Hahaha, I really look forward to meeting U! ^^
I wonder what she’ll think of the trolls. I wonder why she’s keeping them under wraps...
UU: thoUgh i gUess i shoUldn't be so startled that a rogUe of void coUld bewilder me so. UU: void players are said in texts to have a way with flUmmoxing even those with plans beyond mortal Understanding.
See, how does she have all these books that talk about the game that the Alpha kids are playing? How does this troll universe have all this but not the beta troll universe?
Unless...
Maybe... maybe U is from the universe they make in this game? :O
I mean, if there’s a Mother Grub on hell murder island, or a dead one to take a matriorb from, there is a chance that the new world would have trolls on it!
Wow, a troll/human society...
Or probably just trolls. There really aren’t enough humans around to get the species off the ground...
#hs day 87#Missfinefeather Liveblogs#Missfinefeather reads Homestuck#liveblog#homestuck liveblog#Homestuck#Homestuck Act 6#Act 6#blacklist Missfinefeather
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SO ?? i am very late to this party and what do i have to show for it ? this shitshow below the read more …. before i let y’all deal with that , i’ll distract you w me for a lil bit !! im dav, gmt tz and he/him pronouns & i couldn’t even tell you were hawaii is on the map nevermind maui ?? my geography skills suck and i aint even sorry bc im a bad bitch n that how it be sometimes ! but my if y’all like a bad bitch who cries over vines @ 3am and stans pearl liason and ben de la creme , then i’m ur kinda bad bitch ! so if you get through this monstrosity below and still wanna plot , like it and my ass will be thrown into your IMs !
*. ☼ wait, how have you never heard of ATLAS MASON? he has only lived in maui for, like, eight years now! plus they look so much like MATTHEW DADDARIO. the twenty seven year old is known for being pretty candid & debonair, although they can be a little casuistic & irascible. someone told me they’re the CONNARD of their group – oh, wait, here they come now! [ cismale & he/him ]
i wanna begin by saying that pls dont expect so much from this kid bc he cant handle high expectations… he kinda just … sucks ???
his parents were and remain to be absolute assholes that he consider to be his bane of existence like they rly didn’t give him it easy growing up and it wasn’t like the tough love ?? it was just tough shit … he was an only child to parents who didn’t know what to do at their young age and just let him grow up … v bad maternal deprivation which didn’t support his growth AT ALL !!
they lived in santa barbara, cali in a one-bedroom apartment where he practically spent his childhood around alcohol and strangers … it wasnt … healthy ?? LUCKILY , he was saved by neighbors and social services who got him into the foster care system !
growing up home - to - home after being in a real fucked up one didn’t settle well with little atlas and he was just caused nightmares for everyone and thing !
for a kid to be so angry all the time did not benefit anyone , especially himself ! this anger was mostly taken out physically on people and these people had been the ones that attempted to make connections with him ! he was foreign to the idea of being cared for as it hadn’t been taught from birth … it sucked for him !
for him to build a relationship , it’s hard and they rarely ever form to ever break and he normally assumes thats a good thing because he knows that the more that he keeps to himself , the better …
for him not being a sociable soul led to him spending his time physically through music and gym … that’s how his life kind of ended up ? it was a cycle for him to get by without making conversation … sure he spoke but it was only when he had something to say of importance …
he kinda just keeps everyone at this restricted distance without letting them get too close to him, but even if he does let them in ? he just lowers some boundaries and allows everything else to remain secluded
deep down there somewhere , he’s just meant for good but refuses to express it …. he has no life purpose and just kind of exists ? he’d probably crack a smile around that one person but they’d be so lucky … it’d be one for the books !
he moved to maui at the age of nineteen after spending a whole year waiting for his passport and several years scraping together cash for a one-way ticket there ! it had seemed like the place where all your worries were non-existent and you were just kinda … free ? he enjoyed that idea and kind of went out there with no plan !
he didn’t get far in maui without a job and he was illegally livin for a few months before he’d got enough for a stable amount of rent and such ! he lives near the coast and really became friends with the view !
now ? he kinda still does the same shit , still quiet as fuck , still got no good morals , still a dirtbag , does illegal shit for tips , threatens visually , sighs a LOT … he needs company but will refuse if you offer
he also Gay .. as fuck ... too gay 2 function ... sry ladies not sry ...
wanted connections of his !
roommate (0/1): this person is the only reason he can afford his place .. he doesn’t talk to them nor does he want to … they know their limits and thats that !
love interest (0/1): hope u like angst ! that’s all this relationship will be until they finally get to the point of figuring out they like one another ! he’s hard to love , pls !
associates (0/?): people he’ll say he knows to get himself out of trouble and allows the same concept to work vise versa , they just use one another for their own benefit … it just be like that
a place to call home (0/1): he does have a HEART ! this person just has a special place in it ? mayb they gave him a sofa to crash on when he moved to maui ? mayb he drinks with them ? they could be bros , even atlas would admit that ! he just needs one (1) person to rely on !
ANYWAYS ! i suck n don’t rly know what this silent bitch wants ? so if u got ideas , let me know !
#ribs:intro#gIF IS ME TRYIN TO READ THE INTRO SJFJDFHSJKGD#thIS IS A WHOLE ASS MESS ?#I AM NOT OKAY NOR STABLE . .. .#HELP ? ? ? ? BRAIN NOT FUNCTIONING
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for the "give me a character": asami sato, seven of nine, geordi laforge, and judy bernly (movie, musical, or both)
thanks!
asami sato:
do i like them: no shes a stupid penguin bitch (im sorry maddie) jk asshdfiojp of course i like her!
5 good qualities:
super smart
she’s bi!
can straight up murder bitches
so! supportive! great friend!
uses her wealth to help people
3 bad qualities:
this isn’t super on her i just don’t like the book one love… triangle? square? idk
like a little too trusting in book one with her dad but like?? who wouldn’t be its her dad??
her relationship with korra just,,, isn’t as queer as makorra since asami is a handmaiden :/
favorite episode: oh lord i haven’t seen lok in ages but like the book four finale idk?
otp: korrasami… duh
brotp: bolin & asami is Good, as is asami & mako, asami & pema, asami & lin, asami &… you get the idea
ot3: uhhh i think i’ll just sick to korrasami
notp: mako and asami in a romantic way,,, bad
best quote: yeah i can’t remember all that much but i know she has some iconic quotes? stuff she says to korra in books 3 & 4
head canon: she and lin are friends! i was gonna write that and then… didn’t
seven of nine:
do i like them: no i hate that bitch (inside joke yall) i love seven with my whole heart (her whole heart gotDAng)
5 good qualities:
efficient
*ocular implant raise*
funny af
won’t take your shit and can 100% rek you guaranteed
the sorta human sorta not thing they did was good, but they could’ve done it better (not her fault)
3 bad qualities:
will definitely defy orders because she’s not starfleet but tbh its iconic
(pretends) she doesnt care about people that much
can’t beat naomi at kadis kot
favourite episode: theres so many?? imperfection or one probably but seven actually has a lot of good eps
otp: b7 but realistically if i was watching dark frontier id say j7
brotp: tuvok & seven, naomi & seven
ot3: i mean,,, i guess belanna/janeway/seven
notp: SEVEN AND THE DOCTOR IS AWFUL but i also hate c7
best quote: “voyager is my collective” look i live for the found family trope
head canon: she finds civilian clothes or a starfleet uniform or something and never puts on those catsuits again, also, at some point she’s like uhhh guys (and the doctor) im kinda nonbinary ya know borg don’t really have gender and they’re all like oh my god cool! we love and support you seven what pronouns should we use and she’s just like just use she its more efficient gender is irrelevant
geordi la forge:
do i like them: hes my boi and i would die for him
5 good qualities:
good engineer!
trying his best!
realistically, he’s like everyone’s best friend
look i’m gay but geordi could get it
he’s funny
3 bad qualities
whatever the fuck that was with leah brahms
sometimes,,,, he’s written by straight men,,,, and it’s not good
doesn’t like cats
favourite ep: oh boy,,, i really like the one where he and ro “die”
otp: daforge
brotp: everyone,,, tasha,,,, bev
ot3: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
notp: tasha/geordi is,,, weird and not good
best quote: oh that one where he’s talking to that woman who is like yeah you’re blind so we wouldve just killed ya
head canon: he secretly loves spot
judy bernly (please hold):
do i like them: yessssssssssssss
5 good qualities:
so fucking funny
Pure™
trying her best!
if she aint relatable than who tf is
will shoot a bitch
3 bad qualities
panics (bitch me too tf)
too nice like she let hart out basically babe i love you but
married a man named dick
favorite scene: the one where she’s kicking out dick (movie and musical) or the copier scene (movie) or dance of death (musical)
otp: doralee/judy
brotp: i mean i guess all of them but really their just gay
ot3: DORALEE/JUDY/VIOLET
notp: judy/dick i guess… judy/hart…
best quote: everything she says… “if i wanna play sex games and do m&ms,” ya know, all of dance of death tbh, “am i stoned?” uhhh “well i hope youre happy… healing was her life,” you know, “and we didn’t panic!” “life without dick”
head canon: she’s gay \_(ツ)_/¯
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