#sorry guys TMI

[crossnamara]

why the fuck is my ass bleeding !!!

[milfzatannaz]

SSRIs more like NFOAs (Never Fucking Orgasming Again)

[takami-takami]

Hawks canonically is able to pick up vibrations through his feathers. The tiniest vibrations from even the sounds of breathing. They have GOT to be sensitive. Like. They have to be.

I don't think they're Always hypersensitive. It's not like a rando brushes against them and he moans or anything. It's context dependent.

[bookishjules]

i'm so glad we live in a world where there was a max lightwood. even if he was only here for nine years. even if he was an accident to begin with. even if that birth never really saved his parents' marriage despite keeping them together. even if the world went on after him as it would have without him. he was here and he was loved.

[purgaytorysupremacy]

oh nuts. a life experience has given me a new layer of perspective on Cas's homosexual declaration of love to Dean.

recently I had occasion to tell a person I had feelings for them knowing full well they didn't feel even a twinge of the same thing for me. while the whole thing was a decidedly unpleasant experience, I kept laughing at myself internally bc I didn't want to say "the happiness is just in saying it" like fucking Castiel over here. (we don't need to talk about it, it's fine.) (I am happier having said it and it's kind of bullshit, but I digress.)

because the thing is, the happiness isn't in just saying it, right? the happiness is in the having. I made a whole TikTok "proving" that the Empty didn't come for Cas when he confessed his love, but rather when he realized Dean loved him back. even for Cas, the happiness was in the having, not in the saying, however brief it was.

and I've always been one of those people who rolled their eyes at the whole concept. why would the happiness be in just being, in just saying it, if it's right there in front of you to have. and then it hit me like a tonne of bricks (as I was washing my kitchen counters).

Cas really didn't think he could have Dean.

at all. in any capacity. he really, truly, and honestly felt to the depths of himself that Dean did not have any twinge of similar feelings, that this really was a Hail Mary shot-in-the-dark. and I think me, personally, really didn't understand that about Cas. that his belief in his love being unrequited was that unshakable.

something else I've been pondering is how audiences have so much more empathy for fictional characters who share traits that IRL they find objectionable and unappealing. but the thing is about fictional characters is that we follow them around in their most private, vulnerable moments. we see Dean mourning Cas when he dies, literally killing himself because he can't live without him, but it's so easy to forget that we're the omniscient ones here.

Cas never knew.

Dean's whole thing was pushing him away, keeping him at arm's length, making it seem like whatever heroic thing he does for Cas he'd do for anyone. he downplays how important it is for Dean to share the Deancave with him, to show him his favourite movies, share his favourite songs. he acts like the things Cas does for him don't mean that much to hide how much they do mean. he uses "we" whenever he even gets in the vicinity of expressing a feeling. "We were worried." "We're glad you're back." "We needed a win." "You're our brother." The audience knew the difference. We saw how he'd clench his jaw or swallow hard or make a face that said "God, I'm being such an idiot". Because we saw him in those little moments. We got to see the cracks in the mask.

but Cas never knew.

the self-hating angel of Thursday was never going to think it was all a way for Dean to protect himself. obviously, that's the delicious tragedy of it all, but what I think I realized at the end of all that is Cas confessing his love to a Dean who didn't love him back wouldn't have worked. Because the happiness really is in the having. If happiness was just in saying it, then The Empty would have come before Cas even finished getting the words out of his mouth.

so Cas's plan wouldn't have worked if Dean didn't love him back.

this is just me yapping on about my own nonsense, but I do think it's really interesting. there's contentment in "just saying it". there's freedom and relief and an unburdening. I think one can argue that it makes being happy in the being easier. there is certainly some joy in telling a person you think that highly of them. but true happiness?

nah.

true happiness is always going to only be in the having. Cas didn't understand the difference until he experienced it, and by then, it was too late.

[swinging-stars-from-satellites]

when I want to write something self indulgent to give me all the angsty and cuddly hurt/comfort feels but I can't because I end up feeling guilty because I'm seeking after feels that I feel in an inappropriate place because my mom told me one time when I was 15 that I shouldn't search that out or it's probably sexual sin but it confuses me because ALL the feels happen that way for me even if it's entirely platonic and nonsexual and so I don't know if it's okay to want to write to that because apparently all pleasure of any sort, even over platonic stories, is sexual or comes with a possibly probably sexual feeling and I also am having a hard time figuring out what's genuine conviction from God and what's just my anxiety/OCD/perfectionism/fear of failure

[undyingavenue]

oh lord i know the r34 of this guy is gonna be CRAZY

[glaiveprime]

mutuals i need a hug. asap. send me your pets too in asks i want to see cute animals. if no pets just send me your fav ty..........

[saulof-tarsus]

I've got a question for the Catholic/Christian females (more specifically the married ones but really it doesn't have to be). TO BE CLEAR this doesn't have to do with Catholicism/Christianity theologically and is about sex/sexuality. Read further at your own risk.

Do y'all really just like.... not like sex that much?

Like I'm not talking about the "oh well I like my husband" but like, the extremely pervasive idea, especially in Christian circles, that women just don't desire sex as much as men. Or would be content with having sex only once a month (the worst thing I've ever heard tbh, how do you survive as a married couple like that???).

Multiple facets of why I'm asking but mainly: all the women in my (immediate) family have been relatively open about enthusiastically enjoying sex with the partner they were with at any given time (non-practicing siblings). And like, TMI, I have a WAY higher drive than my husband does so all the "oh if he wants it you have to make yourself available" shitty advice I've seen from fundamentalists just.... doesn't apply to us whatsoever lol. But also, I don't really have any close female friends to ask, and don't really want to ask my sisters in law because that's weird.

Further TMI: We have intimacy around 3-4 times a week and I would say most of the time that is just straight up not enough for me. But, given that's already about 3 times the amount that my husband wants to be intimate, I'm content with it.

It's just, in Christian circles, or like even in pre-Cana, people always talk about how the men are the ones always wanting sex and women need to be the ones to compromise to have it MORE often. I just.... I have never related to that from the moment I started learning about my own sexuality and it seems like the only ones I see talk about a healthy sexuality in women is secularists/anti-theists. So idk. I just cannot find myself believing other women genuinely don't want to be intimate with their husband in that way.

[smoshimonsters]

i need to be locked away.

[sleepingfancies]

Going on a date gonna try not to talk about dragon age the whole time pray for me

[moonrpg]

OK one more thing then I’ll shut up. this isn’t related just some secret deep emmy lore but I personally stopped posting on my other blog cold turkey not after the bajillionth fetish art request, but after someone sent me their own art of that nature completely unprompted

[daz4i]

i am asking everyone to come together and manifest a day off for me next thursday so i can get strapped. amen

[c4tto626]

is 19:17 on a tuesday a bad time for a booty call, asking for a friend

[vilsoo]

Will there ever be another Prize counter girl update?

No pressure, just curious :3

working on it rn love

[itolduthings]

shirtless study sessions are the best