#sorry for the sad post

[secretlifeoflyss]

currently thinking about the way death’s at my door is staged: TW for brief implied su*c*de attempt/s*lf-h*rm

Pony starts the song while sitting at the top of the church with the knife he just used to cut his hair still in his hands. Pony’s tired and he’s been holed up in that church with nothing but his swirling thoughts to keep him company while Johnny is out getting them more supplies. He starts singing about how death follows him, how he’s a danger to those around him, looking back at himself in the reflection of the switchblade.

Unbeknownst to him, Johnny’s returned with water and has been silently listening. And at that line, finally makes his presence known.

“That’s crazy talk Ponyboy” he says. And Ponyboy comes down to meet him on the next floor down. Pony argues about how he’s cursed and Johnny should “move on” and is “better off without [him]”.

Johnny has heard this before. He’s heard himself say those things before and hearing them coming from Ponyboy is scary. Especially when he sees the way the knife in Pony’s hand trembles, the way his eyes refuse to look at Johnny’s, solely focused on the white knuckle grip he has on the blade.

Johnny has mentioned wanting to disappear to his best friend before and was always met with warmth and love from Ponyboy, assurance that he still wants Johnny around. So that’s what he provides for Ponyboy in this moment. He comes closer, making Ponyboy hear him when he says “the reason i’m living is you,” which finally gets Ponyboy’s attention away from the knife.

And in the way someone would approach a dog with something between its teeth that it shouldn’t have, he holds out his hand. He lets Pony make the choice to give the knife back to him. It’s a reach that conveys Johnny’s worry for what Pony might have done with that blade if he hadn’t come earlier. It’s his relief when Pony gives it back and they close their hands around it in their promise to never leave the other alone.

And they smile because they know that while the world seems scary and dark, they’ll always be there for each other. Urging each other to go on even when things look bleak. And it’s with that comfort that they finally let themselves go to sleep for the night.

[deepvoid-mlm]

Hold me, make me forget the hollow feeling in my chest. I’m so tired, and I need someone to caress my hair and tell me it’s going to be okay. I know it’s never going to be perfect but a man can dream, right? Please stay by my side through the worst of it. Sit with me while I’m anchored in place by the numbness in my chest.

[klutzyghost13]

Tears For Fun

Nick Nelson

New Video Edit

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Disclaimer: I own nothing but the editing. The resources used in the video belongs to their respective owners.

This song may be muted in some places due to Copyright.

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Show: Heartstopper

Scenes:

Season 2:

Ep 3 Promise

Season 3:

Ep 1 Love

Ep 2 Home

Ep 3 Talk

Ep 4 Journey

Ep 5 Winter

Ep 6 Body

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Song: Tears For Fun

Artists: Griff

[doffyflamingo]

Miss you..

[msjarvis]

My Nonna is in the hospital.

Unfortunately, her conditions are serious and there is nothing more that can be done. My family and I are just waiting for the call from the doctors, hoping that she can pass through as lightly and as painlessly as possible.

In this strange moment of waiting, and in the pain that I am not able to feel at the moment but that will surely come, I want to thank you…

Because without knowing it, with your stories, with your reblogs, with your posts you are giving me the opportunity to distract myself and make the darkness less dark.

So, in the season of giving thanks… thank you. Truly. 🫂

[daisyfloyd]

Happy New Year

2024 was the worst year of my life.

I was so sad this past year that I couldn't even write much, and what I did write went unpublished. I hope I can now turn all that pain into something positive, and post a thing or two. I've received a couple comments in my fics these past few days, and they've reminded me that some people still like what I write. Most of all, I know I still love writing, I just need to find my way out of this hole and find the confidence to post again.

I hope 2025 is better for everyone. I sincerely wish you success, peace, and I wish you love.

❤️

[pseudonemisis]

Love how in some awful twist of fate I feel equally broken for not wanting sex and for wanting a partner. Like, it feels strangely pathetic for me to crave affection and even worse that I refuse to pay for it in the way society usually deems necessary

[mortuary-reads]

Currently sobbing to "Good Luck, Babe!" Because I have no idea who I am.

[book-of-kingdom-hearts]

Life does not like me, and i'm not liking life.

But mostly i'm not liking myself.

It's been a hard couple of months. Filled with problems at home, body dysmorphia, autism burn out and extremely hightend anxiety.

Just when I started to feel ok ish, life just brought me down again.

Honestly don't know what to do with myself.

It's so hard to explain. There is no anger or hatred, just pure sadness.

To have something you have been looking forward to and working towards to, something that helped you hold on to, made you happy and feel whole to then have the possibility of it not happening and it being taking away....

I feel no anger to anything or anybody,i'm just not liking myself. I feel like i'm constantly messing up, doing or saying the wrong suff.

Like whatever i do will never be good enough. Idk if that feeling stems from my autism and nvld, cpdsd or a combination of both or something completely else.

And i feel like i can't talk bout it with anybody in my personal life. Would not even know how to properly explain it.

[otakusheep15]

Hey everyone. Kind of a sad post today, so feel free to ignore if that’s not your thing.

Today is the day my dog, Noodles, is being put down. It’s happening in a few hours, and I’m absolutely heartbroken. I grew up with this dog, and I can’t imagine my life without her. In honor of her last day, here’s a few pictures of her so that she’ll be remembered.

All of these are fairly recent, but they’re some of my favorites. I hope y’all love her as much as I do.

[shesaidhello-hello]

sometimes u think you are miserable beacuse u are at home and hate ur parents, and then u leave to go to a place where they care about you and u still carry the loneliness with u

[paranormaltheatrekid]

I am only now realizing that my coping mechanisms are not good

[theocddiaries]

Living with ocd is basically living your days without knowing which new or old obsession your brain is going to choose to ruin a good streak that felt too long to be true.

Living with ocd is basically talking in a foreign language that no one understands and is always misinterpreted for those who have claimed to know me better than myself and suffer because of my condition more than myself.

In my case, living with ocd is to suffer in silence, because there could be no one that could be struggling harder than my ''mother'', for calling her something. For her, it's always a battle and competition for the attention. And I'm sick of hiding my suffering and still feeling so guilty about having ocd, of not being able to overcome it overnight because, according to my ''''mother''' I'm not putting enough effort to get better, unlike her.

[astbitesthedust]

It’s done, we haven’t spoken in months but I finally said my last goodbye to the best friend I have ever had and probably ever will have, after I made a mistake big enough to end a nearly decade long friendship I’ve thought about them every night and every day since, I hope sending that message which I know they will never read is enough to let me move on, thank you rose, and I’m sorry, and I hope you’re okay, and goodbye

[ramblesbiab]

I think one of the scariest feelings for me is staring at an assignment I’ve barely started and feeling a creeping voice in the back of my head quietly telling me that I should probably consider various types of medication that have been offered to me, primarily depression, anxiety, and ADHD. I’m so scared of the idea of being dependent on even more things, because I already feel anxious having to take estrogen and t-blockers due to it making me feel like I’m not a real woman, so adding even more, especially because depression ones might cause me to gain weight, my largest overwhelming insecurity, seems terrifying. Maybe I just need to be actually, fully honest with my therapist about how I feel on a daily basis and see if that changes the recommendation from light to stronger.

[hiddenpistachio]

of course it has to rain today 😔