#sorry for the paragraphs everyone
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princess 👑 / common tumble games! cym, fmk, kmk, would you rather, etc. or just talk to me.
cym as fruits or vegetables hehe
join the party!
i feel like i’ve totally forgotten about some major fruits and veggies and had a total mind blank so sorry if some of these sound really boring and sorry again if we’re mutuals and i completely forgot about you
you as green grapes/cucumbers. you just have that refreshing energy but also really comforting and cucumber slices on my eyes on self care nights are one of my favourite things to do
@waklman as mangoes. ur literally the coolest person i know. and the summer vibes you give off especially with your obx summers and the tsitp tgm au you’re planning on writing…it’s just perfectly you. it’s a seasonal fruit which nearly everyone loves, sort of like you in that you’re such a lovely person to be around and i’m so grateful that i’ve had the pleasure of getting to know you
@sematarygirls as a custard apple. i’ll admit, i spent the longest time trying to figure out what fit you and i still don’t think it’s perfect but once i remembered they exist i sort of went ahhh yeah. they’re just really lovely to eat and you don’t get them a lot so they’re really rare to find just like you in that it’s incredibly rare to find someone as lovely and talented as you. if not that, i’d say blackberries bc it makes sense aesthetically
@amoraffairs as lychees. i can’t explain it but it just makes sense to me
@wolvisms as cherries/red peppers. red’s ur colour, i feel like i don’t need to expand on that anymore but you just feel like the colour red and the warmth and love that the colour has to offer as well as its other qualities. you give me downtown girl with slight cottagecore and i feel like cherries completely represent that and you. for the peppers, i do love them but i also realised the server lack of veggies so :)
@goodoldfashionedluvergirl as blueberries. honestly one of my favourite fruits and for some reason i just associate the colour blue with you. blueberries feel very forestry for some reason too and you have that sort of vibe like a retro but also dancing in the woods sort of thing idk if that makes sense but you feel like blueberries to me
@bcyhoods as strawberries. self explanatory and again, it just makes sense. ur so sweet and lovely and i know they aren’t pink but they just remind me of you
+ honourable mentions to jackfruit, sweet potato, asparagus, and more. ily all xx
#drew replies!#thank you for this ask.. i had sm fun#sorry for the paragraphs everyone#100 celebration ⭐️#ily <3
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In light of Blue Eye Samurai winning an Emmy I want to get something off my chest.
It makes me so mad that Michael green gets all the credit for Being the “creator” of Blue eye samurai. It’s so tragic and almost ironic considering the contents of the show that all the Asian women that worked on the show get completely overshadowed by the husband of the real creator AMBER NOIZUMI, who came up with the show and wrote most of the plot. Also the shows *director * JANE WU (who is incredible) and the countless other Women/Asian artist, writers and actors that often don’t get mentioned.
It’s the tragedy of Hollywood plastering the white male pos big name guy over all the marketing for the show all because he directed other unrelated movies. And then people not watching the show cause “the creators a Zionist” (which is a valid reason not to watch something)
And it’s just sad a show created mostly by Asian women about Asian women basically gets sabotaged cause Micheal green is an idiot who doesn’t understand the morals of the very show he’s working on.
It all feels like a frustrating bojack episode.
#sorry for the huge paragraph but in the light of the new Emmy it won I want everyone to congratulate the CORRECT people#bes#blue eye samurai#my post#if you ever decided not to watch it for that reason please reconsider#I
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bee's protective nature over anyone persists even as a ghost & i think he sometimes forgets or doesn't care that only star can see him (sadly no touch tho) & will start shouting & angrily try standing between people who are mad at starscream even tho he can't be seen, he just wants to try & help anyways bcs STOP IT >:(!! BE NICE !!!! cried the ghost no one can hear or see except for the poor guy getting yelled at & trying to overhear the conversation over bee's frantic rebuttals while trying to discreetly let bee know it's ok while ALSO trying not to look Insane .
continued attempt at a 4am drawn doodle comic below
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i might draw detailed later but yeah i just wanted to give yall this headcanon bcs i love starbee so much... the nagging wives finally finding their true loves... another nagging wife.
' you .. do know only i can hear and see you, unfortunately, right? or are you starting to go loopy, because i don't need another insane figure haunting me. I have enough already, as you can try and fail to imagine, little bee . '
' trust me, im Well aware .. of everything you just said . .. but i just. i couldn't just Stand there and do Nothing while someone talked to you like You were Nothing . that's not the autobot way. that's not- my way . '
' . . . '
#starbee#transformers#maccadam#tf idw#transformers idw#bumblebee#starscream#bee posting paragraphs of opinions no one cares abt to his new twitter after his old one got sniped#for telling megatron to offline himself#except no one gets notifs when he follows them except for starscream for some reason so#starscream is bee's only follower but bee keeps posting paragraphs abt anything anyways#' atp just dm me bee.' ' OPTIMUS. CaN YOU BELiEVE HE SAID THIS TO ME????? I CANNOT BE- ' optimus has never touched twitter in his life#jazz made and controls his twitter for him but no one knows bcs jazz uses it to roleplay as optimus and mourns bee being dead#bee keeps commenting hes not dead but jazzOptimus never gets the notification & hes rlly popular so rip bee#i love starbee bcs starbee is when theyre both cringe but free#when the foils meet and have fun the world burns but i am at peace bcs i love them so fking much#anyways um hiii if u guys see this and wanna be moots hiiiiii id love to be moots pls just comment hi or smthing#i need tf friends sobad#sorry for drawing bee like hes princess peach but im not bcs he is indeed my princess#he is my beautiful princess disorder#starscream social distancing from ppl & making ppl think hes an even bigger awkward jerk (he is) but rlly it's to give bee#space to stand between the conversators with his hands on his hips to exchange glares between the two#or just so starscream can see his opinions on the guy hes talking to better#'i think' 😾 that's a'😾 ' it's a gorgeous' 😾 i dont Like that Guy starscre'PLAN'#( um.. why are you shouting..) ' ...... NO.REASON. ' bee in a corner whistling somewhere#starscream grinding his fucking teeth#hes so fking annoyed at his ego being hampered by this hauntful creature but also it's so worth it to see bee be brought out of that#smiley ' lets go autobots!! yes sir optimus sir! ' shell he always puts on for everyone else so it brings starscream away from his#egotistical shell as well and they just both encourage growth from each other by being silly and cute and WAGHH TOGETHER#WAGHHH WAGHHH I LOVE STARBEE WRAGHHH!!!!!!!
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will theo ever be happy
Maybe in another life.
#theo#jack#confusing and alienating everyone who only followed me after i started drawing furries by referencing my old nonfurry character dynamics#but this got me thinking about theo's only happy endings and how they all involve jack...#who i'm not drawing right now. oops. sorry fella#oh theo... see what happens when you're separated from your emotional support tramp#you start committing crimes against nature and people get worried about you#real answer: probably not in amaranthine but who knows WE'RE NO WHERE NEAR FIGURING OUT AN ENDING HAHA#i could ramble for another thousand paragraphs about why he probably won't be happy in amaranthine but to summarize:#1. trying to do crimes against nature for insane reasons#2. only “positive” relationship is an evil parasite who is using and manipulating him#3. only person he talks to about his problems is a dead body#4. no jack to keep him stable... so far. i want to add him to the story but that's a long way off#but if you want to make A version of theo happy you can play our game Wishbone (once it's done...). he's in it because of course he is.#my draws#asks
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I've been following @druidposting's DR2 playthrough on discord and we just had a really good discussion about DR's Closing Arguments. Specifically the way the murderer is depicted as grey and featureless, which until now I found a bit annoying.
In Danganronpa it's repeatedly the case that we don't have the full picture until the talking actually stops- which always goes beyond the end of the trial. We generally vote first and come to understand what the murderer's actual motive was, sometimes filling in important pieces of the timeline in the process, afterwards.
But none of that matters for the killing game because characters' emotions aren't directly relevant to who was the 'blackened'- the only thing that matters to Monokuma- so it comes out afterwards and does nothing to change their execution. It doesn't matter how sympathetic they are (basically everyone) or whether other people share responsibility for the situation (eg. Hanamura, Pekoyama, Momota) or whether they intended to murder at all (Nanami). They objectively pulled the trigger and nothing else matters. Nothing about them as a person matters.
The Closing Argument mechanic might illustrate that problem- literally. They're a dramatic, conclusive summary of the entire case... constructed before the vote even happens, before we know if we're actually right, and they're missing something really important:
The actual perpetrator.
We quite literally don't even begin to see the real person behind the crime, any real exploration of their mental state, anything besides the cold, hard facts of the murder that are necessary to convict them, until the comic finishes and the protagonist makes their final accusation- replacing the grey figure with their real appearance in a shot that's often intensely emotional.
And these comics lack crucial parts of the case's timeline and sometimes important parts of the very scenes they depict that we only find out about afterwards. And those are what we know; characters may die with some pieces of the truth and prevent us from ever learning them. These aren't objective depictions of the murder, they're the protagonist's subjective attempt to connect the facts they have. A join-the-dots portrait of someone with missing dots and no colour.
Even characters' expressions may not match how they truly feel, with the grey placeholder potentially looking way more confident and sinister than they were in reality. Pasting Falter's commentary here since they put it well.
For obvious reasons this could especially be a problem for characters that die before the trial- the ones we never get a post-vote testimony from. DR1 chapter 4 really highlighted that in the way Asahina's huge misinterpretation of Oogami's feelings took up a lot of the post-trial discussion, only for Monokuma to reveal Oogami's real suicide note and recontextualise everything.
It might really be a problem for how Komaeda's depicted in DR2 chapter 5. While he isn't greyed out, we get panel after panel where he's either level-headed or maniacally evil, and even the depictions of his self-torture and death don't humanise him:
But we know that his real feelings were more complicated than that. We have his actual corpse to compare the last page to.
He died afraid.
If we approach the comic as Hinata's mental image of him instead of reality, he died without anyone truly understanding him. He was alarming, very hard to relate to, actively fought against people doing so, ensured even the killer didn't watch him die, and the survivors couldn't begin to understand his motive until a chapter later. The Closing Argument reflects that.
Early in DR1 Togami calls out the rest of his class for judging others by their own standards. However, he, too, is doing this, maybe more so than many other characters; his inability to view other people through anything but the cold, brutal logic of the killing game bites him in the ass in chapter 4. In DR2 chapter 2 voting without a good understanding of Pekoyama's motive or Kuzuryuu's involvement nearly got everyone killed. Komaeda's a walking embodiment of the problems with flattening people into caricatures and not empathising with them, suffered from people doing that back to him, and his case- the Closing Argument for which turned everyone else into grey placeholders- was impossible to solve with objective facts. It was only survivable because the survivors cooperated and one person tried to analyse things the way he would.
The games have always been a critique of the justice system and Japanese society and push us to care about others as individuals, not reduce them to- and judge their right to exist by- something they've done or their net impact on society. There are always consequences when someone neglects to do that, and the above might be yet another way the games explore that theme.
#danganronpa#dr analysis#komaedology#komaeda#.txt#sorry @ non komaedaheads for making it about komaeda again LMAO#that was not the intention initially he's just... a really good exploration of this#and i think about his expressions in that comic vs his corpse and what we retroactively knew he was dealing with a lot#btw don't send spoilers to falter please!! i'm @ing to credit them- this was a discussion not solely my ideas- but they are not done yet#and aren't reading this post until they're caught up for obvious reasons#this came from discussing ch2 since the incomplete picture people voted with nearly killed them#(btw don't @ me about komaeda's description in the second-last paragraph being an oversimplification; i know :p )#(he has nuance- especially outside of the killing game- but i'm just focusing on the thematically relevant broad strokes here)#(eg. i feel like he demonstrates empathy sometimes but kodaka has said that lack of ability to empathise/be empathised with#is a theme for him- and the ways he's been proactive in the killing game consistently lacked regard for others' feelings/individuality#reducing them to interchangeable Ultimates(TM) instead. it's partly why he self-destructed while everyone else#was able to forgive themself and keep moving forwards imo. your worth being defined rigidly by objective contributions to society#does not mesh well with the idea of rehabilitating people who've destroyed the world before they could even start to improve it#and even if he did give them a chance at surviving he still succumbed to his own ideology in the end#killed himself for 'hope' and to be 'important' like he 'wanted' but died terrified and in pain and alone instead of fulfilled#man i wish 2.5's ending/postnwp canon in general dug into that ;-; )#ANYWAY ty for reading all that. i feel like i rambled a lot in this one. i have a headache now ghdkjsfgdsf
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People wanting Pen and Colin’s story to drag out like they've only just met in ep 1... HELLO???
They've known each other since they were kids, why are you expecting them to have "let's get to know each other" conversations like Pen and Debling had? Polin are so far away from acquaintances that it's diminishing their story and their essence as a couple by adding superficial dialogue. They are each other's best friends (sorry Eloise) and know each other better than anyone (ex. Penelope seeing through Colin’s mask immediately after he came back) and that's why they don't need 7 episodes to fall in love - they're in love even before ep1 of s3!!! (Yes, Colin as well).
You can't expect a slow burn because the slow burn has already happened, specifically in the seasons before this one.
Not all love stories need to have an interesting beginning and build up, some are a bit more tame but much more exciting after they get together (aka the LW drama that's about to ensue) and similarly not all love stories end right after they wed.
People compare the last two seasons to this one and expect the same things, and that's virtually impossible considering we've known Colin and Penelope now longer than we did Anthony and Kate or Daphne and Simon. Plus, the tropes are also completely different so people who expect Kanthony 2.0 this season with Polin are absolutely fucking insane.
We know Penelope loves Colin, we know Colin doesn't think of Penelope as someone he might marry, we know Penelope wrote about Colin and Marina and we absolutely know that they still care deeply for one another. So therefore there's no need to add all of that if it's already astablished but rather to continue and develop their story into a new depth and a new story, with them already being in love from the beginning.
Also,
HALF OF THE FUCKING STORY IS STILL MISSING!?!?!?!
Yes Jennifer, of course the story feels unfinished and rushed by the end of ep4 because IT IS STILL FUCKING UNFINISHED
...
#i mean jesus christ#media literacy is dead#and everyone who got high on booktok enemies to lovers that get together in the last paragraph losing their fucking minds#because for once a couple doesn't need a 100 years of just looking at each other before realising they're in love#because god forbid one does something about their feelings on time#fuck off#you're ruining the vibe#sorry#polin#bridgerton#bridgerton season 3#bridgerton s3#nicola coughlan#luke newton#bridgerton 3#penelope featherington#colin bridgerton
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begging you ppl to PLEASE TAG your spoilers!!!! don't just put up a "this post has spoilers!" thing on the top and not tag it or put it under a readmore! this does not work, because you're requiring people to very quickly scroll without looking at the screen and that's not conducive to browsing the site!
#jay.error#ninjago#dragons rising#even if you aren't op PLEASE tag spoilers#the quickly scrolling bit does not work for several reasons#one of which being you don't know how long the post is#it could be like a couple small paragraphs or it could be a series of like 20 images#and you wouldn't know#so either you scroll an obsene amount and maybe miss other posts on your dash#or you're forced to look back to see if you finished scrolling#which hey! exposes you to spoilers!#sorry i'm maintagging bc it is SO easy to actually tag spoilers on tumblr#you can do it so much easier#sorry. i'm a bit frustrated#not everyone wants to/is able to watch the new season right now
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what a beautifyl nurse!!!!!!!
reference & stupid vent under the cut
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my art is genuinely js getting so fucking ugly atp. in my horrible shit art era. fucking kms I hate this so much. stupid idiot loser art KYS.
can’t fucjing draw for SHIT anymore. god I hate drawing sometimes
#art#fanart#mcr#my chemical romance#gerard way#mcr gerard#mcr fanart#gerard way fanart#gee way#nurse gerard#my chem#sorry#im extremely fucking jealous of everyone’s art atm and it is tearing me apart#the vent part of this post was originally 9 paragraphs long but it made me look like an idiot#ill delete the venting when I realise how stupid I sound#my art’s js been getting progressively WORSE#and it’s been stressing me the fuck out#along w the fact that my mental health is in the dumps again. stupidstupidstupid#stupid idiot#idiiot#stupid
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Vitali kept cutting and cutting and cutting, tears dripping down onto his tank top and into the sink. He accidentally scraped one of the scissor blades past his finger- and his tears rapidly mixed with a few drops of deep red blood. He loved his hair. He had always done so- but his mother too. She had been obsessed with it, and when he had decided to bleach it she had been livid. But for some reason she had still allowed him to do it as many times as he wanted, as if she believed it would at least stop him from cutting it short, even after he had come out as transgender. And it had worked, somehow. He had never even dared to think about picking up a pair of scissors. Vitali let a single scream leave his lips as he threw the scissors down into the sink, gripping the edge tightly again as he nearly lost his balance. He was out of breath; shaky, shallow inhales providing him with just enough oxygen to not pass out, and he slowly looked back up at his reflection. And in that split second of realization, he regretted it. All of it. A sudden clarity washed over him and his sobs faltered, deafening silence washing over the bathroom as he carefully brushed his now neck-length hair out of his face. It was uneven; some strands barely even reached his chin. He looked different, now. Could barely recognize himself. — From Chapter 12: The Mother; read the full fic here
taglist (opt in/out)
@shellibisshe, @florbelles, @ncytiri, @hibernationsuit, @stars-of-the-heart;
@lestatlioncunt, @katsigian, @radioactiveshitstorm, @estevnys, @adelaidedrubman;
@celticwoman, @rindemption, @carlosoliveiraa, @noirapocalypto, @dickytwister;
@killerspinal, @euryalex, @ri-a-rose, @velocitic, @thedeadthree;
@jacobseed
#cp2077#cyberpunk 2077#art#art:vitali#nuclearocs#nuclearart#DO YOU GUYS REMEMBER THE BROKER... that was one hell of an adventure i need to reread the whole thing and revise it#chapter 12 is one of my favorite chapters EASILY because of the whole conflict between vitali and nadya. definitely one of my best works#with flashbacks balancing it out and then the stark contrast in the end of the fic with vitali going to see mama welles#longest chapter too with nearly 15k words... i was so insane for that but i'm sooo happy with it. and proud of it too. i'm allowed#anyway hi here's a brief break from my tewposting to show you this piece i put together after seeing a cool ref#lots of experimental stuff in this one sorry about that. the sky was fun to paint :]#SORRY ORION YOU GET YOUR OWN LINE IN THE TAGLISTGHBDJKFDGHFDJGJ insane that you can't tag everyone in one paragraph anymore
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i think that my main qualm with mac finds his pride is not that it isn't funny which. by the way it kills me that they for some godforsaken reason purposefully stripped so much of the comedy out of that episode. peaches. god. but more so that rob mcelhenney CANNOT fucking dance so you have this incredibly talented ballerina quite literally dancing circles around him and for me that kills the whole thematic significance of a DUET. a duet is equal! it’s the melding of two partners together into one performance!!! it’s acceptance and violence and mutual love or obsession or hate all in one!!!! the message they're supposed to be sending is that mac's reconciliation with god and her love and acceptance is a reconciliation of mac’s Self with a Higher Self. but instead because ROB can't dance SHE is the one running his life. GOD is the one dragging poor mac around and yanking him to and fro. and instead of casting god (the conception of her held in mac's mind that is) as a benevolent presence trying to help mac find pride in and accept himself it instead casts her as a gaslighting mother figure which he ALREADY HAS.
#sorry i did ballet for 14 years and my brain is abnormal now#peace and love to everyone who fucks with this episode it makes me so upset that i cant even think about it#HOW DO U FUMBLE THAT BAD#couldnt they have brought in a stunt double or something my goddddd#ntm how funny it wld be if mac was just randomly an incredible dancer and its never mentioned again#ugh#iasip#mac finds his pride#mac mcdonald#tw my opinion#thick paragraph of text sorryyyy
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Me making literally any two characters foils:
So Scott and Scar in secret life express love in opposite ways. All three of Scott’s lives were given willingly, the man lives and breathes sacrifice. He wants to see those he cares about succeed more than he cares about his own chances. He runs to Martyn, to Gem, and tells them to kill him. Scott has made it far enough too many times to have any illusion about how these games end. When he dies, he wants it to be not a tragedy but an act of love. His game has to end somehow, and it might as well be at the hands of his allies, giving them a parting gift to increase their odds however he can. Scar, on the other hand, hadn’t won before. While Scott often has the most dedicated and steadfast alliances in these games, Scar tends to end up alone. Scar, who is clumsy and is actively unbothered by jabs at his apparent incompetence, was never expected to make it this far. No one thought Scar would win, least of all himself. Being so consistently underrated with his skills often going unnoticed, he’s as surprised as anyone by him making it as far as he did. Still, it is largely because of his reputation as accident prone that Scar refuses charity. Pearl offers her life on a platter to him several times, but he adamantly refuses every time. Out of character, Scar tells her that he doesn’t want to win that much, not like that. If he’s going to win, it’s going to be by his own merit. Besides that, he won’t accept sacrifice on account of respect. He says to Pearl over and over again that she gets this far because she’s good at what she does, that she should be proud of that. Pearl deserves better than a lackluster sacrifice to someone who was barely even an ally earlier that same episode. She deserves to take it as far as she can, Scar refuses to get in the way of that, not unless he has to. When it comes down to the two of them, he was more than willing to fight as long as she fought back. Scar wasn’t going to tolerate Pearl sacrificing herself, out of both pride and admiration. But what if there was another factor as well? After all, Scar’s been on the other side of sacrifices before. The first winner of the series achieved as much largely due to Scar’s willingness to offer himself up. Scar had urged Grian to kill him as soon as they were both on red, but — just like Scar four seasons later — Grian refused. Instead of doing what Scar said and killing him then and there, the pair headed back home. They said their goodbyes, and leveled the playing field as much as possible. Regardless, Scar knew who had to win. Scar has always been a better fighter than anyone has given him credit for, if he had any desire to be the one left standing, he would have put up more of a fight. Instead, he took his time and pulled his punches while Grian mercilessly wailed on him. Grian wouldn’t accept a direct sacrifice, just like Scar refused with Pearl, but that doesn’t mean neither Scar nor Pearl had any plans of making it out alive. Looking back at Third Life, it’s hard to say if Scar regrets how he handled the final duel, if he wishes it had happened differently, but we know his and Grian’s relationship was never the same. Grian distanced himself from Scar, they always gravitated towards one another but Grian kept pulling away. Scar may not regret the way Third Life ended but Grian does, and Grian’s regret haunts Scar too.
#I was gonna do paragraph breaks but then I decided it’d be funnier if it was just one big block of text#sorry#secret life#life series#trafficblr#scott smajor#goodtimeswithscar#pearlescentmoon#grian#nerdy’s traffic analysis#not proofread we die like… uh… everyone ig
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hc: when the pevensie siblings come back to england after the Lion, the witch and the wardrobe, they all have a fancy cursive handwriting and all their teachers are very impressed.
To the point where they call Mrs. Pevensie and tell her that Peters handwriting is now readable and he gets better grades.
And Susans handwriting was already flawless before, but now it just got a little more fancy.
I belive Edmunds handwriting got a lot more cursive. i think he wrote really small and barely readabe letters before but now it's still small but more cursive and elegant.
Im kinda torn between thinking lucys handwriting is absolute chaos now (like it was fine before, but now she even uses different narinan languages and even some ancient runes or something and no teacher understands anything) OR it was a mess before (like with every child her age lol) and now her handwriting looks like written by and adult (to the point where the teachers accuse her mother of doing her homework and that lucy is somehow cheating. / I think while growing up in narnia she had teachers who showed her how to write perfectly and bc she was so young they had the most influence on her writing style. And obviously since she grew up there her handwriting developed with her. so when she came back her handwriting looks all grown up and the teachers dont understand how, bc they had a hard time getting her handwriting to be even readable (honestly they had the fear, that her handwriting would develop to look like her brothers). And now they all have fancy handwriting) (also is it noticeable that Lucy is my favourite? xD)
At some point they just decided the children were bored when they were in the country and decided to learn how to write fancy (Susan probably saw how bad her siblings handwriting was and decided that just wouldn't do)
Also the Pevensies all use fancy weird narnian words that the teachers dont understand but pretend to bc they dont want to look like children have a better vocabulary than they do
#narnia#narnia headcanon#lucy the valiant#lucy pevensie#edmund pevensie#edmund the just#peter pevensie#susan pevensie#susan the gentle#the pevensies#the pevensies return to england#i was looking into graphology and got distracted#handwriting#narnian handwriting#also i am sorry for spelling mistakes#i actually just wanted to write one or two sentences for everyone but oops look at the paragraph i wrote for lucy (and edmund) lol
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See the thing is. I know I'm good at writing. Like I have my weak areas or things I need to improve in, but it's not a skill I otherwise spend a lot of time feeling insecure about because a) if I don't believe in my writing literally who will b) if I want to publish my writing I ought to at least feel a resting level of good about it because editors and agents likely will not be cradling my face like a prize cat and telling me how talented I am while asking for their edits c) I've always had an audience for my writing even at its worst– I started sharing my original works online when I was around 16 & that really helped sell to me the idea of 'there will always be someone out there who likes what you do' d) untalented men never think this hard about the quality of their works and they always end up published anyway and e) I don't have many other thoroughly developed skills so why not have one I feel good about. Having said this. Awkward feeling to realize you're one of the authorial weak links in your postgraduate creative writing degree's social circle
#part of the issue is definitely also like. i am good at what i do! its just that im the only one doing it#40 people in my fuckass degree and im the only one who writes fantasy fiction. we had one more girl but she did romance & dropped out#(to be an agent) (this isnt a sad story)#but yeah no im mostly surrounded by very talented poets and screenwriters. which makes my works seem a little. frivolous. in comparison#and my friends especially are so fucking talented it makes me ill. and they engage politely with me about my writing but its also#superficial and i cant blame them because its simply not what they write/what theyre interested in! i feel the same about poetry#but my friend actually seemed surprised a while ago when i mentioned a thing id been writing and i joked that it looked like she was#surprised i could have good ideas and she didnt answer. and like. man.#i am a good writer! i fucking know im a good writer but im a good FANTASY writer and these people are. different writers and theyre good an#im floundering in this environment next to them and theres something not as like.. artistic in what i do its so fucking embarrassing#and they also display just such a lack of curiosity as to others' writing like.. they wont check the moodle forum to read what the others i#our module have uploaded for each assignment?? like arent you even just CURIOUS? but now im also just wondering if theyre like 🤞 this#with each other in a way that excludes me and my stupid flop ass fiction. i dont know. its just so silly. everyone always talks about#finding community in writing groups & degrees & such and that is exactly the last and most isolating place ive ever been insofar as my#writing goes. like at least way back in high school no one cared in general. here people do care. just not about what i can bring to the#table. although again i really dont know if this is a larger scale lack of curiosity/involvement in others works so i digress.#notnow#tbd#sorry this is a very priveleged complaint to have i AM deeply enjoying my degree and ik im so lucky to get to go where i attend. i just#occasionally feel sad. and knowing i failed my last assignment (which WAS fiction) (one chance to prove myself! cute) isnt helping much#if the poetrypeople are better at me even in the thing im meant to be good at. baby we're about to enter the mental health meat grinder.#but we stay silly. i think i just need to find people online etc to talk to about writing again like i did at 17.#just full insanity paragraph analysis. that was fun. i enjoyed that.
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do people realise that you can like characters without having to morally defend them??
like misty quigley is a fantastic character - she's awkward, can be sweet, disturbing, cruel, ruthless, intelligent, dorky. there's a lot of layers to her character, just like every character on yellowjackets.
and you are allowed to like her for all her complexities! she is not real! you are not supporting an actual cannibalistic, elder abusing, serial killer! she is a well written character and you do not have to try to convince random strangers on the internet that she is simply "misunderstood"
#someone trying to convince me that misty isn't a killer because she “kept jessica alive for as long as she could”#and she doesn't enjoy violence because she's a carer#my brother in christ SHE kidnapped jessica in the first place and kept her hostage and then murdered her! no one made her to this????#she became a nurse to have control over people's lives!!!#i freakin love misty she's a brilliant character and part of that is how scary and manipulative she is!#she can be your “babygirl” without needing to have the moral standing of a small town kindergarten teacher#people needing their faves to be morally upstanding is one of the WORST trends in recent years#sorry but someone just responded to my misty post with multiple paragraphs of such a stupid take#look everyone's allowed to have their own opinions but i'm allowed to think their opinions are stupid#misty quigley#yellowjackets#my post
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I've been thinking lately......I like the idea of Calenglad not liking Créa at first.
Like he's notably untrustworthy of outsiders, and can be a bit harsh and brash in his dealings with others. And in comes Créa, newly sworn in, young and in awe and despite her friendliness, he's stand-offish. He's suspicious and doubtful and maybe a bit harsh to her. And she wouldn't know why! Nothing she tries works.
She's lonely and feels that she doesn't fit in well, and Calenglad's cold welcome doesn't help things, despite her being Dúnedain. She doesn't have that many friends, and Calenglad asks more of her than others, and it never seems enough. She never complains, but she can't figure out why he has such a strong disdain for her, and while she loves Evendim, it's making her question if she's a good Ranger at all.
And I think a big reason why Calenglad has such disdain for her is because of her father. I personally think Calenglad and Baranhir were both very good friends with Arathorn, despite being opposites- Baranhir was kind and friendly and giving, and trusting- while Calenglad is slow to trust, a bit more dour, and reserved in his emotions. Créa has many of those traits that her father did. And I think there might've been some incident maybe that Baranhir was the cause of that made Calenglad dislike him.
Maybe Calenglad believed he didn't take being a Ranger seriously enough, even though in his heart he knows it's not necessarily true. Baranhir holds no ill will towards him and never treats him differently despite Calenglad's dislike of him, and that's okay. And maybe there's an incident where Baranhir is too trusting of someone, or let's something slip through his fingers, he's not fast enough, and maybe people get hurt or killed because of him that cements this fierce disdain on Calenglad's part- he clearly wasn't fit for being a Ranger, whether the circumstances were truly Baranhir's fault or not, and this only proved it.
Calenglad did feel some smidgen of guilt at his treatment following Baranhir's death years later, never having patched things up despite them both spending much time in Evendim, though Baranhir's time there lessened in the decade or so preceding his death- and that too he uses against him, thinking him not dedicated to the cause.
But I think Calenglad is like. A mix of emotions at first upon meeting her. A strange new "Dúnedain"- without a sindarin name, not very good at speaking sindarin, who only knows a fraction of their history and culture, who apparently is only joining now- and her father was Baranhir, Valar help him. There are a lot of circumstances that kept Créa away, and none her fault or within her control, but Calenglad, based on the sins of the father alone, already has marks against her.
And it makes Créa miserable! She already feels like an outsider, and despite taking every terrible job, taking his criticisms and beratings and his coldness, his opinion never seems to change. Even some of the other rangers, whom she's done good work for, wonder why Calenglad doesn't cut her slack.
And god, poor Créa. Her father has been dead a long time, and as a child she refused to believe it. He left over the mountains and promised to always return to them, and even as the years went on and the chance of him being alive was slim, some part of her still held out on the smallest of hope that he could be alive still....and then she finds out that he was buried in the hills above the city, overlooking the lake. And she is absolutely devastated. It was foolish to think he still lived but having that hope crushed, to see him one last time, to ask him so many questions, to just hear his voice...all gone.
And on top of everything else, she really does wonder if she's even worth being called a Dúnedain. That maybe her parents were right never to tell her. She's angry at the world and her father and mother and every circumstance that's led here and she's alone and struggling and just wants a friend. Someone who understands her. But she's an outlier and it's a heavy burden to bear.
And maybe sometime after that things come to a head- Calenglad is cold and biting to her over something trivial and Créa has taken his disdain for far too long and just EXPLODES. She rounds on him furiously and takes him by surprise as she jabs her finger into his chest and tells him off- that he has treated her like shit for NO reason, that she has done EVERYTHING he has ever asked of her without complaint, has done NOTHING but work hard and grovel and she is DONE being berated by him.
And she doesn't care that there are others around to hear as she tears him a new one bc she has spent so many months, if not years keeping this in and she has worked SO goddamn hard to be here and he has NO RIGHT to treat her like this. He is impossible to please and treats her as though she's worth less than the dirt on his boots! and by the end she is SCREAMING at him bc she refuses to be treated like this by him because despite everything she's done, it will never be enough- she will never be enough.
And usually Calenglad is prone to anger but he's just stunned at this. No one has ever confronted him like this, and he's realizing that oh. He's pushed her to her breaking point. Maybe he was a little too harsh to her as she's pointed out. She storms off in tears and after some moments he tells off the other rangers who had stopped to look at the spectacle and he goes off to look at the water and think.
And he's going back on how he's treated her and putting the pieces together as to why he's been so harsh...and eventually realizing that, Oh. He put his feelings against her father onto her, and never gave her an opportunity or a chance to prove herself. He had already written her off from the start and he never saw how harshly he was treating her. He knew very little about her and never took the opportunity to learn, as he did for the others. He did not put himself in her shoes; how alone and isolating things would've been, the pressure, the stress...and he had never once considered that perhaps he was going too far.
And it's a lot for him to come to terms with. It's uncomfortable and probably still a bit pissed, and though he wants to be angry with her for that blowup, he can't. It was deserved, as much as he hated to admit it. He regretted the treatment he gave her that brought them to this point. He let his prejudice blind himself, but his pride did not want him to apologize. Not yet, anyways.
But he does start to change. He doesn't approach Créa because he's not the best with words, and she is closed off and her demeanor frigid. It's a noticable change to her usual warm smile and words and he realizes he hasn't seen her happy in a long time, and he feels guilt that he was the cause of it. Things are very tense and clearly word had gotten around to those who weren't there, but Calenglad softens. He doesn't give her the shitty, hard jobs (as often). He doesn't nitpick everything she does, nor scrutinize so heavily. He pays more attention to how hard she works. And one day he even gives her praise. It was mild, but it was something- and even Créa was surprised, if not reticent, to believe his words.
And I think eventually maybe they do talk. Créa's preferred spot to hide on Tinnudir is behind the keep, close to the water (or maybe they talk in Tham Nambarth, before she's established her gardens). And maybe one day Calenglad seeks her out and she's surprised to see him there, and even more surprised when he says that he's not there to berate her- she doesn't have to flee. And then he sits down next to her and she's like oh god. oh god. uhhhhhhhh. and they're looking out over the water towards Rantost in silence.
It's a very long time before he speaks. And he starts by talking about her father- who he was, what he remembers. That the only thing they ever agreed on was fishing. He's had time to reflect not only on his treatment of her, but also on his treatment of her father, to try and see past his bias. And it's awkward and uncomfortable because neither know how to navigate this, and its a conversation long, long overdue. He tells her that yeah, he disliked her dad. But he wasn't a bad person at all. And he let that cloud his opinion of her- and he was wrong. And that he's sorry. She didn't deserve how he treated her and going forward he's going to rectify that. But he understands if she doesn't accept it.
And Créa sits there and looks at him bc she never expected an apology out of him. She's still pissed and hurt and more than a little bitter at him. But he's come out here (though he shouldve come MUCH sooner) and recognized what he did was wrong...and wants to do better. It's a small peace offering, but a peace offering nonetheless. And she accepts it. She nods her head and looks out over the water and they sit in silence for a long time, just thinking.
And maybe she talks a little bit about her dad- how he always traveled but came back to them, and that she remembers vaguely hearing stories of this place. Why her parents never told her- that she followed in his footsteps to find him. And Calenglad just feels like shit bc god. He thought Baranhir just fucked off bc he didnt take the job seriously and instead he was trying to raise a family!! He didn't know! And while Créa doesn't go into a lot of detail, she huffs a small laugh and says that he taught her how to fish, too.
And Calenglad has the ghost of a smile on his lips and tells her that...well, maybe they'll have to go fishing some time. It's one thing they have in common.
And tbh it'd be soooo interesting bc it would really make Calenglad reflect on his actions in the past and come to regret how he treated Baranhir- it takes meeting and knowing his daughter to realize that, and he regrets it immensely. The Rangers need more than seriousness and dour and closed off people- they need love and kindness and warmth, too. Calenglad and Baranhir balanced out those things when with Arathorn, and he regrets that he realized much too late and let himself be so against him.
And maybe one day sometime after, when Créa climbs the hills to visit her father's grave and talk to him about all that's passed...and she's surprised finds fresh flowers placed at his grave, lain thoughtfully over the stone. She smiles.
#OMG HOW DID IWRITE SO MUCH THIS WAS SUPPOSED TO BE LIKE TWO PARAGRAPHS!!!!!!.#NOT AN HOUR AND A HALF OF WRITING CALENGLAD CREA DRAMA!!!!!!!!#the girls are FIGHTING#i just meant to sit down and go "yeah i think he'd have beef with her and shed have to prove herself and then he doesnt care but eventually#they grow to have a good and strong relationship! maybe even father/daughter esque or her uncle!!#but NOPE my brain went SIKE WE'RE COMING UP WITH /ALL/ THE DRAMA AND ANGST#putting it under a read more bc its so much LKDFHLFGH#sorry.........idk what came over me#i just think créa needs some antagonists!! variety is the spice of life!! not everyone is gonna like her and thats perfectly fine!#calenglad isnt wrong to necessarily not trust her at first and make her work harder!!#but he is wrong for never allowing her to really ever gain his trust#i havent fully fleshed out calenglad in my head but i love that old man
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Fandom (dpxdc) Thought 2.5:
Context: Halfa!Jason Todd, ghosts communicate through emotions, liminals can do it to a lesser extent
Jason unknowingly keeps trying to push emotions to his family, not realizing he’s trying to communicate. With his family’s awkward outward reactions combined with the lack of response to his core, he feels isolated. Even thought it’s an accident on both ends, it has an effect on him.
To make it a bit worse, the batfam is liminal with all the death in the family and Lazarus exposure. They accidentally reject the emotional conversation from Jason’s core, so neither party knows why Jason is so on edge, but they don’t push for answers.
Danny (bad reveal, good reveal, literally Just Vibing in Gotham—whatever works) hears Damian’s core humming or trying to trill/chirp, and of course he has to help the sick liminal/baby-halfa core. With a LOT of bonding, Danny gets Damian to drink some healthy ectoplasm, and he feels a lot better. He even brings Jason over, knowing the connection to the Pit was stronger in his older brother and wanting to extend an olive branch after the… everything.
Once Jason starts feeling better and Frostbite is brought into the conversation, Damian realizes he can’t hide this from Bruce forever. And, with how many people in his family—hell, his contact list—had been exposed to the Lazarus pit, or gotten caught up in time shenanigans, or had been killed, it was best everyone knew. With Danny’s only request being “say I’m a meta instead of a ghost,” Damian goes to his father’s study.
(Forgive the ooc/awkwardness I don’t normally write fanfic lmao)
Damian entered Bruce’s study. “Father. I have something to inform you of. We have made a terrible mistake with Jason.”
Bruce’s train of thought pauses at hearing his youngest call Jason “Jason” instead of “Todd.” He looks up from his WE paperwork. “What is it, chum? Is he okay? Are you okay?”
“We are both well, Father. It is…” He grimaced and visibly tensed. “You have to promise to not be angry with me.”
Bruce raised an eyebrow at hearing his youngest say such a “childish” phrase. “I will do my best. I’ll at least let you finish talking first.”
He knew this was the right thing to say when Damian relaxed slightly. Therapy was a wonder.
“Um…”
Oh. Oh no. Damian Al-Ghul-Wayne was not one for uncertainty—especially not in a conversation he started.
“Go on, lad, I’m listening,” Bruce said in as gentle a tone as he could (without getting too patronizing for his proud little Robin).
“I met a meta of a ghostly nature. He assessed that there was Lazarus Water in my body, and when he replaced it—“
“He what.”
“You said you’d let me finish.”
Bruce pulled out a notepad, jotting down bullet points to return to.
[Pit in Damian?? REPLACED?? Unknown ghost meta]
“Once he replaced it with the healthy alternative, I found…” He swallowed. “I found that I could more easily accept and show love. My time in the League played a part, of course. However, the Lazarus Pit had an effect on me as well, latching onto my desire to be worthy of a place here. I essentially have a rudimentary organ that runs on and communicates via emotion. Jason does as well, and his is stronger than mine. We have unknowingly been rejecting this more emotional form of communication, making him feel unaccepted and misunderstood.”
[emotional organ??? Accidental rejection? Possible to learn emotion communication?]
Damian shifted his weight under his father’s intense and worried Interrogation Glare™️. “Now that we know the problem, and are attempting to rectify it, we feel much better. Due to everyone around us being exposed to death, the Pit, or time travel, Jason, the meta, and myself thought it best if everyone was made aware. Our meta friend has a doctor who has specialized in this organ and the culture surrounding it for decades. He can apparently better help us manage our health alongside a regular physician.”
[meta doctor. Contact… everyone]
Bruce set his pen down and didn’t move for a few moments. “Are you finished?”
Damian nodded. “Are you angry?”
Bruce let out a long breath, closing his eyes. “I can never tell. Fear and rage feel a lot alike when it comes to protecting my family and my city. You’ve gone against a lot of my training, which displeases me, but I still love you, and I always will. We’ll see what your punishment is when I get more details. I don’t want to punish you for good outcomes, but the methods are important, especially in our work and at your age—“
“You can stop now, Father. I understand now what Drake means when he says he doesn’t know how to respond to the sincerity therapy has given you. I’ll gather the family for a debrief.”
Bruce opened his eyes to see his youngest wincing a little at the emotional vulnerability, but something else caught his attention.
His son’s green eyes faded to blue.
#hhhhng I tried#dpxdc#this is longer than I thought it’d be oops#beta read by the CUTEST boy#I’m so sorry everyone#the thought w/o the fic is posted separately#chaos reigns with a wobbly wrist#I did it like this instead of reblogging it bc tumblr only lets me copy one paragraph at a time and I wrote this first#I am too lazy to copy all of this for later but at least I know now
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