#sorry for being h*rny on main
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~Return of the Bonk~
#sorry for being h*rny on main#needed something to get me out of my funk#weight gain#wg kink#feeding kink#belly kink#wg art#weight gain art#es-draws
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My longing for human intimacy is immeasurable right now
#mentally exhausted#i hate it here#sorry for being depressing#i cant do this#sad thoughts#i’m tired#tw depressing thoughts#tw self loathing#self destruction#tw self destructive behavior#h*rny posting#h*rny on main#intimacy
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I think the main reason I didn’t want mc to be turned this soon is purely bc the feeding scenes were so intimate in a way that a lot of the make out scenes aren’t like I’m SO sorry those feeding scenes were the equivalent to a 30 diamond scene TO ME.
#this is so h*rny im sorry#I’m showing my whole ass on main today#Id really is the only book I turn up this hard for these days#also as a person vehemently opposed to the idea of living forever being a vampire is A LOT but dating one? right up my alley#playchoices#immortal desires#cas harlow#gabe adalhard
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Alex Newhook is my james bond!!! He is my mcdreamy!!! He is my james dean!! He is the moment!!
#he never misses#he never disappoints#sir i am on my knees and i dont care who knows it#sorry for being h*rny on main#but him !!!!!!!#alex newhook#colorado avalanche#avs lb
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not to be bisexual on main, but between marisha’s short dress, liam’s short sleeve shirt, and robbie’s everything………….. this watch party is unfairly targeted towards those of us attracted to multiple genders 😔👊
#THEY ARE ALL. SO. GODDAMN. PRETTY.#sorry for being h*rny on main but also. no i’m not.#critical role#tlovm watch party#eli.posts
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AWOOGA I'm rotting... I love this… everything…
Warm You Up
I was writing another fic but this popped into my head, oops.
Just a small thing on the different ways that cockwarming SDV Sebastian would go, according to my brain. Not super smutty but it is nsfw, it's more fluffy imo.
Not proofread, lmk if there's typos.
Sebastian x GN!Reader
content: fluff, nsfw, cockwarming
MDNI AND BLANK BLOGS!!
⋆。˚ ☁︎⋅ ˚。⋆。˚☼˚。⋆。˚☁︎⋅ ˚。⋆。˚☽˚。⋆。˚☁︎⋅˚。⋆。˚☼˚。⋆ 。˚☁︎⋅ ˚。⋆。˚☽˚。⋆
Cockwarming was not something Sebastian saw himself doing. Not that he was opposed to it, but he never really had a partner to suggest the concept to. It seemed like it would be more frustrating than anything anyways.
But it’s become something of a routine for the two of you these days. It wasn’t really something either of you had planned on either, it just happened.
He hasn’t officially moved in, but he might as well have, with the amount of time he spends at the farm. He walks over, taking his daily smoke break on the trail to your place instead of by the lake or the train station. If you aren’t home yet, he takes the time to pet your farm animals or sit on the bench outside, admiring the hard work you’ve put into the land. And when you do arrive, the two of you make dinner, passing little questions about each other’s day. The two of you eat over bed trays perched on each lap so you can watch something on your old laptop on your bed, quiet hums and speculations interjecting shows or movies. It’s not exciting, nor is it boring. It’s just...peaceful. Domestic. Something he hasn’t really experienced at home in, maybe ever? Perhaps that’s why he finds himself at your place so often. He’s never been the one for daring, passionate relationships anyways, not that this lacks passion. It’s a just nice warmth that cradles the need he has inside him, and he feels so understood by you, something else that’s severely lacking in his life.
And when you’re both craving some intimacy beyond a good cuddle, but too tired after craning over a keyboard or from whacking down trees/pulling weeds/monster hunting and whatever else you do, you’re so impressive, he thinks, he’ll pull down his pants so you can slide onto his cock.
The first time was an accident, he’d pulled an all nighter, and almost didn’t even come over. But he missed you more than anything, and craved your touch, only to fall embarrassingly asleep when you got on top of him. He was mortified, barely looking you in the face when he woke up the next morning and realized what happened, but you just shrugged and said it was okay. You teased him about it after too, of course.
But it happened to be the best sleep he’s gotten in ages, and when he asked to try it again, you just obliged and now it’s just a part of your relationship.
You fall asleep to kisses and hands roaming your body, curled up around each other in a way that satiates the loneliness he feels in himself. And then in the mornings, when it’s too early, the sun barely up, you coax him out of bed by riding him until he spills inside you with breathy whines. Pleased smiles are shared over breakfast and a kiss on the forehead before he goes back home.
Other times, when it’s raining in the mornings, and he’s already in his head, he wakes you with hard, desperate thrusts, drawing orgasms and moans from you until the dark thoughts go away. Luckily, you take the rainy days easier, allowing the two of you to stay in bed longer. He takes care of you then, apologizing for the way he treated you, not that you ever mind, and it almost always leads to another round. It's sweeter, tender. You whisper reassurances then, cupping his face and he kisses your brow.
It starts happening outside of the farmhouse too now. On particularly boring days, you’ll visit him as he’s working, and while you take his job seriously, it’s become a habit to slide into his lap, a sly look on your face as you work on loosening his jeans before sinking down on him. You love the way he groans, head falling back and eyes rolling into his skull as he splits you open. His hands always fly up from his keys, gripping your waist until he remembers he has a job to do. And you stay there, peacefully drowsy until it’s finished, and then he bends you over the bed or couch. You stay the night, not leaving his room, sneaking out int he early morning after one too many knowing looks and comments from Robin afterwards.
Sometimes, it’s when he’s playing games. Curled up in his lap again, back against his chest so he can rest his head on your shoulder to look at the screen. He twitches inside of you whenever the game gets intense, hips fucking into you as if it’s by reflex. It only makes him play worse, because then he’ll get lost in the feeling of your warmth around him. He passes the mouse for you to take over so he can focus on thrusting into your sweet spots, a hand on your hip to keep you stable and the other on your jaw, turning your face to kiss him before urging you to focus on the game.
Occasionally, you get impatient faster than he does, unexpectedly moving or adjusting on his lap throughout the game, making him moan straight into the mic. You give him an innocent look while he glares at you, making excuses to the other players. It repeats until you start moving your hips, bouncing up and down until he breaks. He doesn’t even try to win the game, just pushes away the keyboard and mouse so he can take you right on the desk. The fact that all his teammates could catch on turns him, and you, on more than it should. He rams into you, crooning dirty words, teasing hands never helping you finish until you’re crying and begging him for it. He always cums with the loudest, drawn out sounds, hips still moving until he’s too overstimulated to continue. He pulls you back into his lap with a chuckle and another kiss, ready to move to the bed for a cuddle until—
“Goddamnit Seb! You forgot to mute again!”
He’s gonna have to apologize to Sam tomorrow.
⋆。˚ ☁︎⋅ ˚。⋆。˚☼˚。⋆。˚☁︎⋅ ˚。⋆。˚☽˚。⋆。˚☁︎⋅˚。⋆。˚☼˚。⋆ 。˚☁︎⋅ ˚。⋆。˚☽˚。⋆
Lmk what you guys think/which way is your fav hehe
#fic rec#farmer x sebastian#sdv farmer#sebastian x reader#stardew valley#sdv sebastian#sdv smut#sdv sebastian smut#stardew smut#idk sorry if you see me being h*rny on main#that is quite litrally my blog babe
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I love you, Titania fire emblem
#mommy? sorry. mommy? sorry. mommy?#she's so mother#but also mommy#the duality of (wo)man#like got damn does that woman do the absolute most#I finished my por run and she was my number 1 unit#she's so strong and powerful and can and will absolutely annihilate anyone in her path#she became an absolute crit machine towards the end too#and brother. there's nothing better than watching her point the head of her axe at the enemy and staring them down before obliterating them#i want her to crush me like a bug#i apologise for upholding the male gaze :( i just want her to wring me out like a sponge#anyway#nqp#gabe rambles#gabe plays#fe por#sorry for being#h*rny on main
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Honest south park dating headcanons🔥💯
dividers by pinterest
Masterlist!
♡Im writing so much bc i literally have nothing else to do so enjoy 🔥🔥🔥🔥💯💯💯💯
♡Anyways honest headcanons about how i think the main 4 would act in a relationship with you (all aged up) mostly gender neutral but there is like mentions of boobies :)
TW Mentions of s*x, dr*gs and v*mit
Stan
•Honestly you wouldnt have to put much effort in to get with him
•Mother fuckers desprate for love
•Hes actually a bit of a wreck once you date him
•Crying because he is scared you'll leave him
•You are defo a rebound
•To be fair he'd start to fall for you though
•And because of that he'd throw up all over you
•He'd break up with you if wendy said she missed him
•In his eyes theres always someone better
•And im sorry but he moves on fast
•If wendy breaks up with him again though
•Expect a drunk call at 3 am saying how much he misses you and how he fucked up and if you can get back together
•Its your choice if you get back with him though lmao
Kyle
•He is extremely awkward
•Kyle has high ass standards so when he sees someone that meets those standards he'll fall hard
•This man cannot talk to people he likes
•If he doesnt like you he is the rizziest rizzler ever
•And 0 rizz if he does lmao
•He'd start SWEATING
•He would be stumpted for words
•Then when you leave he'd blame someone else for 'fucking up his chance'
•If however you did start dating him (god knows how)
•He'll probably dump you over the smallest thing
•If you vape or smoke though its a big no no
•And like you would argue over the smallest thing
•He'd rant and rant and rant and rant about something cartman did that day
•Probably would put work or school before you
•He forgets your his s/o sometimes
•He'll treat you like a therapist
•However he is really fucking good in bed 😩😏
Cartman
•This man would always be looking out for no. 1
•Genuinely would not give a fuck about you until you show any value to him
•Kyle has a s/o? DAMN GUESS WHO ALSO HAS ONE NOW
•Always trying to prove he is better than everyone else (especially kyle)
•He listens to alpha male podcasts
•Andrew tate supporter
•To be honest despite him also being plus sized
•He wont date someone who is also plus sized
•Its because andrew tate said he can do better
•He is delusional and doesnt believe you when you say he is fat
•Its apparently just baby fat
•He would let you in on his schemes and let you tag along but would also throw you under the bus and say it was all your idea if he gets caught
•Manipulative as fuck
•Would get pissy if you said no to anything he asks you
•He'd leave you because "He can do better"
Kenny
•He fucking stinks
•Its either he'll stink of zaza or just plain stinkyness
•He like never showers even when he had the opportunity to
•He'll have a huge crush on you and you'll find out through other kids
•Cartman probably spread it around
•He'll always be staring at your boobs or ass
•Says word like "GYATT DAMN" "WHAT THE SIGMA"
•He doesnt have tiktok only youtube shorts
•Has a shitty cracked iphone 6 in rose gold with no case
•He'll be very loyal like he would never get with someone else
•However always staring at someone elses boobs or ass if not yours
•Will compare you to 'attractive celebrities'
•Hes done many many dr*gs
•Him and his mates probably made a list of all the hottest people in the school (god knows where you are on it)
•He has no rizz at all because hes extremely shy
•Probably only got with you bc of how big your gyatt was
•Hes always really h*rny
dividers by @k1ssyoursister
#kenny mccormick fluff#kenny mccormick south park#south park kenny mccormick#south park kenny#south park x reader#kyle broflovski x y/n#kyle broflovski headcanons#kyle broflovski fluff#kyle broflovski smut#stan marsh fluff#stan marsh x reader#stan marsh x y/n#eric cartman#eric cartman x reader#eric cartman headcanons#south park headcanons
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Be my Tumblrella, lemme take care of your mental health and fuck your brains out
#mentally exhausted#i hate it here#sorry for being depressing#i cant do this#i’m tired#sad thoughts#tw depressing thoughts#tw self loathing#self destruction#tw self destructive behavior#mentally unstable#mental illness#mental health#actually mentally ill#dating#cute date ideas#h*rny posting#h*rny hours#h*rny on main
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Sorry for being h*rny on main, but how soon will we be able to enter the fwb stage with Soarine and Vincent?
After chapter 6, probably.
#coe answers#coaaf if: vincent#coaaf if: soarine#me who planned this to be a 15 chapter book but now it feels like it'll be way too long: erm
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you're allowed to take a hit out on me for this one but only after it's uploaded
lately i feel like a slight hypocrite for Mean Aro posting abt Mob characters while actively writing 5k Ekumob Master/Pet Crime AU Fuckfic Send Tweet but then i remember. ah wait 😌👆 i am the greatest writer in the history of man and can do whatever i want. also they're aro
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made up fic title: say you won't let go
Interesting that your first one made me go soft and sweet because this one is alllll smut lmao.
Immediate thoughts are Alex wanting to try something different with Henry and Henry saying yes let’s go for it, and a big part of it is him edging the hell out of Hen and making him beg 👀
Sorry for being h*rny on main lmao
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sorry 2 be h*rny on main but every time i watch an asian drama i'm reminded that i am indeed capable of being attracted to men and it breaks my brain a little bit because wow western standards of male attractiveness really don't do anything for me but dylan wang in that beautiful wig and eyeliner and those goddamn cheekbones make me fall to my knees
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R3dFiVe ✨ 「レッド5」 Artist@R3dFiVe_artist: Oh, you sweet boy... I'm already over 40~ -Lusamine
#r3dfive#lusamine#pokémon sun and moon#bikini#all time best#damn#>_>#sorry not sorry for being h*rny on main
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I'm so sorry for being h*rny on main today
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sorry for being h*rny on main but I feel like this
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