#sorry I am just very very frustrated with a lot of things with nowhere for it to go

[isfjmel-phleg]

Rant part 2

At least there was actual faculty agreement with this next batch so we're not exactly being dishonest, but apparently "collection development librarian selects a list of books, sends it to the faculty of a school asking if they're okay with it, and then submits an order request with the first replying faculty member given as the requester of the books he chose" is how we're doing it now, rather than prioritizing requests made by the faculty themselves. There is no possible way that there could be any further slant or imbalance in our collection in this practice, of course.

[wonysugar]

fuck you stupid | ning yizhuo

synopsis : you thought you’d seen it all with her, but no, she somehow managed to surprise you even further.

pairing : bimbo!ningning x fem!reader

genre : bffs to... fwb?? idk they just fuck,, so obviously smut too! xx

tags : yall got lost help, fingering, degradation, belittling, dumbification, car sex, she's so stupid but she fucks you good so it's okay, very slight cunnilingus, she slaps you like once so impact play!

warnings : none!

word count : 1.6k

you, y/n l/n, weren’t exactly smart, but you also weren’t exactly stupid. like yeah, you weren’t a genius per se, but it’s not like you were brain dead either. average was the term you always used to describe your intelligence.

you unfortunately couldn’t say the same about ning yizhuo, your best friend. 

you loved her, like that’s your bitch, of course you love her! however, you’d be lying if you said that she was intellectually capable, because she just wasn’t. god, she was just so, so painfully stupid?? clumsy??? careless???? all of the above applied when it came to this woman. not even to be mean or anything of the sorts, just, yknow… natural selection at its finest.

she was aware of that, though, and even thrived in being the self proclaimed bimbo everyone knew and loved. (to which you wholeheartedly agree with, by the way) and honestly? you just couldn’t stop teasing her about it whenever you two hung out. things similar to “stupid hoe” and “dumbass” always escaping your mouth as you two laughed, probably moments after she bumped onto something on the sidewalk whilst spilling all the tea to you. 

in summary, she’s done stupid shit before, but nothing, nothing could ever top what she had done that day.

the day she got the both of you lost in some random parking lot at like, 2 am.

“ning, we’re fucking lost.” you told her, eyebrows furrowed in frustration as you watched her giggle nervously.

she grabbed her cellphone and hovered her finger over the power button, “oh come on y/n don’t be like that, i can just go on google maps and we’ll be out of here in no ti-“

a black screen.

she cleared her throat hesitantly, sighed, then pressed the button again.

nothing.

she kept doing that, giving longer presses to the side of her phone in hopes of a miracle . your patience was running thin and you were quite frankly not far from panicking.

after the 27th-ish try, you finally snapped at her.

“fucking hell ning do you not charge your damn phone??” 

“sorry that i forgot to?” 

oh she had to be joking. 

“girl oh my god what the fuck?? we’ll stay stuck here for only god knows how long and it’s all gonna be because ‘ning yizhuo forgot to charge her phone beforehand’ for fuck’s sake.” you closed your eyes and pinched the bridge of your nose in exasperation. trying to calm down, you ignored ning’s gaze.

her stupid annoying yapping wasn’t helping at all. like, at all.

“oh so we’re once again blaming me, got it. y/n you didn’t even bring your own phone, how do you have the audacity to put the blame on me.” she said back, her eyebrow raised up as she threw her phone down on her skirt, sighing exasperatedly. 

“because someone told me it was her turn to get the aux.”

“where in that sentence did i ever tell you not to bring your phone??”

“god, ning just- just stay quiet. okay? just- please shut up, i’m trying to think. we can’t rely on you for anything.” you told her, exasperated.

in response, she scoffed, “no?? no i won’t, actually. you’re always putting the blame on me and it’s seriously starting to piss me the fuck off. yeah i’m a bimbo, whatever, but does that mean that you have to talk to me like i only have two barely functioning brain cells??” 

“oh please, saying you have two functioning brain cells would be wayy too generous. you’re always doing the stupidest shit out of the two of us. i mean fuck, you literally drove us here, in the middle of nowhere. you’re not a bimbo, you’re just fucking dumb, ning.”

when you looked back at her, she seemed hurt. like, 

a wave of guilt quickly washed over you upon seeing her pained, pained expression. she looked into your eyes, frustration and sadness clearly showing into her own. yeah, she looked pissed. you wanted to apologize almost immediately, and you were going to, 

if she didn’t suddenly press her lips onto yours before you could even get a word out. 

-

how do best friends make up after a fight?

usually, they talk it out, they go out, hug it out then get milkshakes or whatever, hell, sometimes they just go a day or two without talking then eventually forget about it.

this? this was none of that.

since she planted a kiss on your lips, you, instead of doing anything stated above, were fucking.

like, yeahh you were still lost, but at least you were getting your pussy ravaged. the situation could be handled later; when you weren’t drenched.

throwing your head back as you moaned out ning’s name, you were straddling her in the backseat of her car, feeling her two fingers deep inside you and stretching you out. she looked up at you with lustfully hooded eyes as she kissed and left very visible marks all over your neck, all the way down to your collarbone, her free hand fondling your tits, lazily playing with the nipple. 

“f-fuck ning keep going i’m sososo close- fuckfuckfuck..” feeling yourself getting pushed closer to the edge by the friction you felt, you bucked your hips faster onto her digits. the knot tying in your stomach felt like it would’ve snapped any second now, that is,

until she stopped moving her fingers altogether.

frustrated, you whined loudly, “ninggg please let me cum pleaseplease-” 

“oh yeah? so now you wanna rely on me for something, and it’s to make you cum?” she laughed. “fucking slut. i’ll make you cum whenever i want to, got it, bitch?” she added, pressing her thumb on your swollen throbbing clit, smirking condescendingly and watching how pretty you looked when pleasure contorted your face.

you unintentionally clenched at her words, nodding shamefully. it was embarrassing enough having your best friend knuckles deep inside of you, having her call you names and whatnot, but the real embarrassing part? 

enjoying it thoroughly.

she knew this, she knew she had you wrapped around her finger at that moment and oh was it such a power trip for her. seeing you be so needy for her touch, you almost started riding her fingers yourself, too. she was always the one being treated like a dumb bitch, it was nice being on the other side of things, for a change. 

she kept twisting and pulling on your nipple with her free hand as she slowly started to slide her fingers up and down your walls again, giggling and paying close attention to how your body shook and twitched at each and every one of her slow movements. what a sight to see. 

“you like being fucked stupid hm?”

and that’s what she did,

seconds,

minutes,

what felt likes hours,

you were sloppily bouncing and grinding on her fingers, speed ranging from a painful slowness to an overwhelming rapidity. 

you gripped her arms tightly, as if you would fall into some sort of void if you didn’t hold onto her for dear life. resting your head on her shoulder, you whined, losing yourself onto her. her fingers were still pumping in and out of you at that moment, faster than they were before, by the way, so it took you all of your body strength to not just cum right then and there, but you managed to hold back. for her, you held back and took all of it. every minute passing, every single motion feeling like it was threatening to make you go insane. 

“ning pleaseplease let me cum i wanna cum so badly fuck- pleasepleasepleasepleaseee-” you begged, looking down at her with pleading teary eyes.

“fuck, look at you. calling me a dumb bitch all the time, yet here you are, acting oh so stupid for my fingers. such a brainless needy little whore for me, hm? does my idiotic, pretty girl wanna cum?” 

you nodded eagerly as you whined, tears actively running down both of your cheeks, so desperate for release that you quite honestly didn’t care for how ridiculous you looked to her at that moment. you just wanted to cum, so, so, so badly, and you were ready to give up your dignity for it.

the sound of her hand slapping your cheek resonated in the car.

“say it. you know damn well i don’t accept pathetic sounds for an answer.”

“fuck— your idiotic pretty girl wants to cum pleaseee let her–”

she hummed, smirking at your response. incredibly amused by your behavior, she took her fingers out of you, picked you up by placing her hands on your thighs, then gently put you on the empty seat that was next to the one she occupied. upon seeing you sat comfortably, she proceeded to kneel down on the empty space between the front seats and the backseats. y’know,

the ones a grown woman couldn’t possibly fit in?

it’s okay though, like, yeah she would most definitely complain about back pain later, but right now?

she needed to feel you cum all over her tongue.

and that’s exactly what she worked towards, her tongue driven by the scent of your arousal to roam all over your folds and clit, kissing and sucking on every inch of your core as she attentively listened to all the sweet noises that came out of you. it really did not take long before your moans reached octaves you didn’t even know you could achieve before, an overwhelming wave of relief hitting you like a truck. you were 100% sure you would pass out afterwards.

at the end of the day, yeah, you both were still stranded in the middle of some unknown parking lot, but at least, the stress of it all evaporated in the air.

while you were trying to catch your breath, you made a mental note;

never underestimate ning’s intelligence when she was in a bad mood! or, do. depending on if you wanna get fucked stupid that day or not.

[absolutebl]

This Week in BL - Weird Strange Warmth, Thailand

Organized, in each category, with ones I'm enjoying most at the top.

Sept 2024 Week 2

Ongoing Series - Thai

Jack & Joker (Thai Mon IQIYI) ep 1 of 12 - Oh it’s fucking great. What a fantastic start! It’s a fun cast too. I adore seeing all of the familiar faces. This is a lot more fun than Kidnap (sorry GMMTV, do better). I mean both shows are serving the same kind of concept but with completely different energy. I love that War is playing phi in this series. I think it suits him much better. In fact. I really like these rolls for this pair. I think they’re gonna knock it outta the park. I am so happy this is good. I wanted it to be good. And it’s good!

Monster Next Door (Thai Thurs Gaga ) ep 8 of 12 - Oh no! He read the journal. No snooping! Well I guess they needed to get some tension for these 2 from somewhere, otherwise they are too good to each other. Meanwhile, I’m not sure about the sides in this particular series. I don’t hate them. The laundry jealousy moment was pretty well done. But I'm not sold, either.

Addicted Heroin (Thai Tues WeTV) ep 5 of 10 - I forgot that we were already on the ICONIC kidnapping section of the narrative. I miss Gu Hai's OBEY sweatshirt from the original. (Someday I will own that sweatshirt.) Hero should at least be wearing an OBEY T-shirt. Frankly I miss the harshness of the original too. Johnny Huang was just so massive, August doesn't have the physicality to carry this scene off. Nor does Thailand have the guts to push it into the creepy obsessive territory that made the first version so thrilling to watch.

The thing about the original kidnapping bit was we could feel Gu Hai's vibrating need to possess overriding everything else (including his sense of humor and frustration with himself). Gu Hai KNOWS kidnapping was an over reaction, he KNOWS he is being absurd, he just doesn't care. Because he doesn't just want to fuck Bai Luo Yin he wants to consume him.

We didn't get any of that from Hero. Hero, as a character, just isn't edgy enough to carry off a kidnapping, he's been softened too much in this new Thai form.

And then... An around the back of head not-kiss? Interesting choice. (Checks to see if BoomPeak are hanging out nearby.) Is that because the actor is under age? We in that head space for this whole show? (Pun intended.) Not sure how I feel about any of it.

It’s a much milder confession this time around, because it’s Thailand, but it’s still warped. So I’m still here for the weird strange warmth of this damn show. I did laugh a lot during this episode. 

Kidnap (Fri YT) ep 2 of 12 - Oh I am very much enjoying this.

"You’re the worst kidnapper I ever ever met" is an apt accusation.

Battle of the Writers (Sun YT) ep 7 of 12 - I kinda enjoyed the little side romance story (wealthy writer intellectual + poor local salt-of-the-earth boy = Love Seaing all over my damn screen). It came outta nowhere but... okay.

I honestly have no idea what’s going on with this show. But the kisses are nice. And I pretty much like all of the couples. It’s wild how disjointed it is but simultaneously how pretty. It’s like Star Hunter got hold of Mame’s budget and aesthetic. 

I Saw You in My Dream (Weds Gaga) ep 9 of 12 - Boyfriend era to the max. Production is still ignoring the whole "dreaming the future" POINT OF THIS SHOW.

The Trainee (Sun YT) ep 11 of 12 - Jane is VERY COOL. Like tay-style cool… as it were. I like their dynamic when they're given one to play with. It’s the rest of this show I don’t enjoy. 

Live in Love (Sun Gaga) ep 2 of 5 - It cute. Bit odd but cute. I like the language play, of course. It’s an interesting pair to watch flirt because it’s all language play so that's fun but otherwise, I'm not convinced.

Ongoing Series - Not Thai

The On1y One (Taiwan Thurs Gaga) eps 7-8 of 12 - This BL doesn’t drink from the water bottle to show off its neck. It quietly hands you the water bottle and expects you to understand that is not an act of generosity but of polite distancing. It's about the delicacy of the messaging, and the way themes are conveyed with such nuance.

This story is entirely about the two of them figuring out about each other, and then trying to be what the other person needs based on that information. It means they (and therefore we) are on this journey of discovering affection together. It's brilliant.

I must talk about the physical acting of these two for a second. That scene where they’re fighting over the book and then fall into the pool. That was one take. That’s amazing. These two are really fucking stellar not only at acting but hitting their marks. And let's be clear, that is NOT the same thing. I bet they both have stage training.

Define irony: watching two abandoned kids counsel their respective parents through abandonment issues.

Sugar Dog Life (Japan Sun grey) ep 6 of 10 - It is stupid cute and utterly charming. They are total boyfriends. It’s just that one of them wants to be and one of them assumes they already are. Actually, nevermind boyfriends, they’re married.

I Hear the Sunspot AKA Hidamari ga Kikoeru (Japan Weds Gaga) ep 12fin - It made me whimper a lot because they’re both hurting so much. But in the end it was... fine.

Summation

The compassionate story of a college kid going deaf and the one boy he can hear. I love this manga and was let down by the first adaptation (Silhouette of Your Voice), so I was expecting a lot from this BL. I expected the soundscapes in this one to be fantastic, and the were, but I didn’t expect the filming to be something special too. But it really is. The acting is great too. But the story? It was just fine. They spent far too much time on the build to a relationship, then wallowed in their separation and a problematic girl character, when they should have been showcasing Taichi's character arc and his capacity for connection. Perhaps Japan should pass this one off to Thailand, It's a soft story centering on "food as love" so they might do better with it. I am, yet again, disappointed. 8/10 but I want to give it a 7/10

First Note Of Love (Taiwan Mon Gaga) eps 9-10 of 12 - It’s fine. it’s cute. I enjoyed getting some backstory. More of the sides, please.

Seoul Blues (Korea Fri? YouTube) ep 7 - Honestly, why don’t they just call this entire series The Cheating Diaries and have done with it? I’m only watching it because there’s basically nothing else from Korea right now. But I’m generally mad about it. Including the fact that everybody is so pretty and the acting is so good in the series, but the stories are so terrible.

It's airing but...

The Hidden Moon (Sat WeTV) ep 1 of 10 - This is a supernatural romance (my ghost boyfriend trope) by Violet Rain (I Feel You Linger). A man is hired to write an article about an old mansion in Chiang Mai being converted into a café. He sees the ghosts of people who died at the mansion, falls in love with one of them. Was substantially recast. I loved IFYLITA except the ending so I think I'll let this one run it's course you can tell me if it's work tracking down... if they managed to land it. I have my doubts.

Happy of the End (Japan Tues Gaga) - A boy is disowned for being gay, dumped by his boyfriend, and ends up in a dysfunctional co-dependant relationship with his would-be kidnapper. We were due for another messy JBL and it's exactly as expected. I do not like it at all. And ya know what? There is plenty airing. DNF 

In case you missed it

The Time of Fever (Korea iQIYI & Viki) 6 eps - Side couple from Unintentional Love Story, HoTae & DongHee, return for a spin off backstory show.

It started out fantastic. And it was a relief to have a good Korean BL finally back on my screen, even a high angst one. But I did spend a lot of time trying trying to figure out whether they’re going to rehash or reboot from the previous series. Are we in Between Us territory or Don't Say No or (heaven forbid) To My Star 2?

None of the above, it turns out.

This was a pure prequel about lost first love. As such, it has no real finale beyond what we got in ULS. Which, for this pair, wasn't satisfying. Putting my disappointment over this aspect aside, it is enjoyable on the strength of the characters, actors, and chemistry (if not story). Yes I said chemistry, the kissing is fantastic, sometimes KBL can do that. This one featured the "teach me to kiss trope"!!!! Plus language play. Both favorites of mine. It is all angst, ache, repression, and miles of subtext. It did fudge the ending by not skipping forward and over the events in ULS to depict what happened next (what, no year long time jump when we actually need it, Korea?) It's a worthy companion piece, but should be watched BEFORE ULS for maximum satisfaction, and even then you're going to be left feeling like HoTae & DongHee's relationship was never adequately discussed or depicted in order to achieve resolution.

The little cameo of my baby in ep 5 was much appreciated. But the motorcycle should’ve been set up a little bit more. Of course I wanted it to be about them getting together after the events in the first series. But this was all backstory from start to finish. And while it was good backstory, it wasn’t ultimately satisfying for these characters. Still it’s a good little series. 8/10 

Meet You at the Blossom (China) - I'm eating crow, binging the fucker, and live blogging. It's just taking me some time. This isn't really a bingable show, not for me anyway. It's A LOT to take all at once. No new one this week.

4 Minutes (Gaga) Ended - Spies reported in to say the ending was not-exactly-unhappy and mostly lackluster. I'm torn over whether to watch. My natural disinclination to binge, meets my dissatisfaction with wishy-washy, is going up against my love for fabulous high heat and pretty pretty men.

Mitsuya-sensei no keimakutekina ezuke finished and it’s reported to be solid. Age gap treated with respect. I'm curious, so I'll check it out. Not doing very well on binging and catching up but it's on the docket...

Next Week Looks Like This:

Upcoming BLs for 2024 are listed here. This list is not kept updated, so please leave a comment if you know something new or RP with additions.

Still Coming Sept 2024:

9/15 Love Sick 2024 (Thai Sun iQIYI) 15 eps - Remake of the original. I'm scared too.

9/15 Bad Guy My Boss (Thai Sun Gaga) 10 eps - Assistant to a player boss who is in love with that boss decides to quit to save himself. The boss then makes a move. (A gay What's up with Secretary Kim?)

9/17 Love is Like a Poison AKA Doku Koi: Doku mo Sugireba Koi to Naru (Japan Tues Netflix?) 10 eps - Lawyer and a con artist meet at a bar, pair up, fall in love.

9/28 Teenager Judge (Vietnam Sat YouTube) ?? eps - oh I don't know just Ba Vinh doing his thing with pretty boys again.

THIS WEEK’S BEST MOMENTS

Love a teach me to kiss, teach me to fuck, whatever moment. (I Saw You In My Dreams sides)

Not gonna lie. I laughed. Addicted.

(Last week)

Streaming services are listed by how I (usually) watch, which is with a USA based IP, and often offset by a day because time zones are a pain.

The tag BLigade: @doorajar @solitaryandwandering @my-rose-tinted-glasses @babymbbatinygirl @babymbbatinygirl @isisanna-blog @mmastertheone @pickletrip @aliceisathome @urikawa-miyuki @tokillamonger @sunflower-positiiivity @rocketturtle4 @blglplus @anythinggoesintheshire @everlightly @renafire @mestizashinrin @bl-bam-beyond @small-dark-and-delicious @saezurumurmurs

Sigh, Tumblr in its infinite wisdom doesn't like too many at-ings.

[the-sinister-story-teller]

this is long, sorry. okay, so it would be angsty with a happy ending (maybe with some smut at the end) where reader is tall and looks like a total dom, but is actually a bottom who is head over heels for angel, and tries to show it but angel doesn’t believe him/thinks he’s trying to use him and pushes the reader away,, though angel has also caught feelings. eventually angel overhears reader telling someone (charlie, husk, idc) how in love he is with angel and how angel hates him and angel confronts him. crying and confessions happen and maybe some smut where angel tops reader.

thanks, i love your writing!!!

A/n: Of course! I love this idea! I hope you enjoy it! ^^

Angel Dust x M!Reader ~ Looks May Be Deceiving

Mentions: Smut, Angst, Fluff, Male Reader, MxM intimacy, Soft Dom!Angel.

Topic: Request above ^^^^

"Hey Angel have you seen my phone?" You called out to your friend, Angel Dust, who hummed in minor confusion.

"Uhhhh...No!" He called back, as you gasped in joy.

"I got it! Thanks Angie!" You hummed, before leaving to go run some errands. To be frank, you didn't lose your phone. You had it the entire time, you just needed a reason to try and confess to Angel, but you chickened out. You had arrived a while back, and grown moderately close to Angel. When you began to try and hit on him he...declined. A lot. At some point, you tried to ask him out to which he sweetly but bluntly said a flat 'no' to. You wouldn't lose hope though. Not that easily, especially with how smitten you were for him. You didn't know it, but he was in love too, but he didn't want to be used by someone again. So, he sheltered himself from it.

Later enough, you came back with groceries that Charlie had needed, your hands full.

"Princess! I need a lil' bit of help here!!" You shouted as Charlie rushed to help you, setting the bags down. You sighed at the relief of nothing heavy weighing down your arms now, before you plopped back into a chair in the lobby. It was then you saw Angel come down, making you sigh softly. You sat up, going to help him carry something. "Here, lemme get that for ya!"

"Oh uh...Thanks Y/n." He spoke sheepishly, as you chuckled nervously again.

"Say uhm...Are you free tonight?" You asked, raising a brow as Angel narrowed his eyes.

"No. I'm really, really, busy tonight.." Angel lied, leaving the room quickly with his things. You sighed, hopeless as you sat at the bar, catching husk's attention.

"Th' hells got you so gloom?" Husk asked, pouring a glass of booze for you, as you took the cup.

"Thanks...and it's nothing just...In a predicament."

"Of what sorts?" Husk asked, raising a brow as he drank a bottle of cheap booze.

"Just..Angel. He acts like he hates my guts but I..."

"You love 'im, don't cha?" Husk sighed as you nodded, taking a swig from the glass, groaning quietly in frustration. Before Angel could fully leave, he was still within ear shot, hearing your confession.

"Yeah..I am. I can't help it!! Have you fuckin' seen him!? He's gorgeous, funny, and just...everything I'll ever need.." You muttered, sighing softly. "I just don't have a chance with him...He hates my damn guts for christs sake!" You exclaimed as Husk huffed.

"They always act like that, to cover up their true feelin's. Only thing is, Angel's probably like that 'cuz of the shit he went through." Husk explained, as you nodded.

"Yeah...You have a point.."

"So, take it easy. He's probably in love with ya' too, he just isn't ready for it yet. Keep shootin' your shot kid." Husk said with a very light smile. You returned to expression, finishing your drink, and standing up.

"Thanks Husk. It...Really means a lot to me." You thanked and he nodded, waving his hand to shoo you off. You sighed, making your way to your room, before hearing a voice.

"Hey Y/n?" Angel spoke softly, spooking you as he came out of nowhere from behind.

"Oh, Angel. It's you. What's up?" You asked as Angel opened his mouth to speak, before sighing, holding his arms softly.

"Listen I...I don't hate you..You're just so nice and I didn't know if you were genuine or just wanted to use me for sex.." He spoke, his voice shaking a bit from the tears. He didn't want you to think he hated you, he didn't want you to lose interest because of it either.

"Where did all this come from Angie?.." You murmured, scared he might've heard your conversation with Husk.

"Damnit I-...fuck...I heard what you said and...and I'm sorry for bein' a complete asshole. I didn't want to get close to you and end up goin' through heartbreak 'cuz you got tired of usin' me." He explained and you swallowed thickly.

"Angel...I'd never fucking use you...Ever..I'm lovesick for you and I'd die a second time to make sure you're happy and safe." You said, a bit of confidence peaking in your voice.

"So you're not..Upset?"

"Fuck no!! If I'm upset at anything, I'm upset you didn't tell me sooner!" You joked, hugging Angel softly as he sighed with relief, quietly and softly crying from joy.

"I love you Angel.."

"I...I love you too Y/n.." Angel muttered. From then on, the two of you began dating, and to say the least, it was fun. Constant pranks and affection. You two were in Angel's room, cuddling as you watched some novela.

"...I'm fuckin' tellin' ya Y/n! She's just gonna dump him!" Angel exclaimed as you scoffed.

"As if! Maria loves Gabe!! I doubt she'd ditch him." You huffed as the two of you went silent, before breaking out into laughter...It died down, as it was just a silent cuddle now. A question lingered in Angel's mind for a bit since you two began dating, and he felt this was the right time to ask. Given he was a bit horny that day, from seeing you to heavy work in a tank top.

"Hey Y/n, can I ask ya somethin'?"

"Uh yeah! Shoot me with it hon-" You laughed, leaning your cheek on the palm of your hand, as your elbow propped you up on the bed.

"Are you...Ready for sex? If not that's completely--" Angel quickly sat up to dismiss it all before you cut him off.

"Yes." You bluntly spoke as Angel stammered before snickering.

"Didn't think you'd reply so fast damn." He laughed as you chuckled, your cheeks growing hot.

"But uh...One thing I'd like to mention...I'm not one to top." You sheepishly chuckled as Angel hummed.

"I get it...Got any big kinks you want me to know tootz?" Angel cooed as he laid you down onto the bed, climbing on top. You practically melted into his touch, bright red from all this.

"Nope...I'm followin' you Angie, you can take the pace however you want.." You muttered sweetly as Angel nodded, cupping your cheek with one hand, kissing you softly as he used the other hands to undress the two of you. He straddled your waist, running his hands over your now bare body as he pulled away from the kiss.

"Not gonna lie tootz, I was expectin' ya to be a top~" He giggled as you bashfully looked away. Angel simply cooed from this, turning your head to face him. "Awh~ don't get shy on me now babe~" He teased as you let out a shaky sigh, before jolting a bit with a soft moan, feeling Angel's hand wrap around your shaft.

"A-Angel please be-"

"I know, I know babe, I'll be gentle...Just wasn't expecting you to be so big~" He sweetly said, leaning down and kissing your cheek. You began to whimper a bit, feeling Angel slowly drag his hand from the base to the tip, rubbing it gently to spread the pre-cum.

"Holy f-fuck angel that- mhh~ -feels a-amazing- ah..~" You moaned out, shuddering from the feeling of Angel peppering your neck in sweet kisses.

"I'm glad babe, s'all i want you to feel..pleasure all the way..~" Angel cooed, holding you closely to him. While one hand pumped your length, the other began rubbing your entrance softly, before pushing its way in, earning a whimper of minor pain from you. Angel gasped, sitting up with worry. "You ok babycakes?"

"Y-Yeah I'm fine Angie..hnn..You can keep going..~" You muttered, as Angel nodded with a sweet look, hugging you close with his two free arms, while two fingers fucked your hole, and the other stroked you. You let out a soft whimper, beginning to pant.

"Are you close babe?~" Angel asked, keeping you close to him while you reached your high. You let out yet another whimper, this time more desperate and needy. "C'mon sweet thing, let loose, ok~?" Angel cooed as you covered your mouth, doing just that. Once you finished, you let your arms fall to your side, as Angel laid on top, playing with your hair. "Happy?"

"So fucking happy babe." You chuckled breathlessly, as you two shared a quick kiss, before Angel sighed.

"Love you Y/n."

"Love you too Angie."

[teaboot]

Hi! (just a personal ask. Sorry if it's not okay to ask for advice out of nowhere but I wanted to see an outer perspective and didn't wanna ask my friends. No pressure to answer of course but I would love to hear your thoughts!)

Is it normal for me to feel overwhelmed about something I want? I am just starting med school and it's a lot but I am fighting. And in my culture, parents buy their daughters their like things?? (like towels and bed sheets and a fridge. Anything they can buy except the apartment basically) for marriage from a young age. But my mom just started recently. And when she first bought me something. The idea of getting married & being a doctor (both things I want) felt like too much I teared up. My mom said I was being spoilers I guess?? Like I was ruining a good moment? Of course it is not that serious since I wasn't outright crying, and I just laughed afterwards as I felt silly lol ,but It got me thinking if I was being that dramatic.

This honestly felt like the moment in the movie where the mom hugs her daughter and says something like "oh how much you've grown" . Her retort felt like it was out of the script.

If you find time to answer, please be extremely blunt. Because I know for a fact I have a tendency to exaggerate things.

You are not overreacting. You are not exagerrating things. And I'm going to tell you this, because I experience this, the tendency to downplay your own feelings and recollections of events very often comes from having other people do it to you first. People tell you your feelings are wrong, or stupid, or irrational, and you learn to listen to them instead of yourself.

It makes complete sense that coming up on a major cultural milestone would make you feel excited, or scared, or overwhelmed. It sounds like you came upon the first step of a very big change and the reality of it all hit you at once, which sounds completely normal and expected!

Fuck, *I* used to get that about moving houses, and YOU'RE expecting shit like marriage? Holy fuck! I'd be a complete mess! The fact that you're level-headed enough to ask questions and process your feelings and talk things through is impressive, because I think I'd be losing my mind.

Personal story, but when I turned 17, my mom asked me if I wanted to go to a restaurant to celebrate. When I told her that it sounded nice, but I'd rather have dinner at home with the family, she told me I was a selfish narcissist, and that I was so busy thinking of myself that I didn't consider that other people might have been excited to go out.

At the time, I thought she'd been harsh but ultimately correct.

Now, I see that she had decided what kind of perfect evening she had wanted, and had expected me to play the part in the movie she had written herself. It had never been about what I wanted at all- it had been about her personal desires and expectations.

And it's normal to feel frustrated about things that don't go the way we want or expect, but lashing out at others is not an appropriate way to handle those emotions.

The way we feel cannot be controlled like a machine. The way we feel is usually not a problem. The problem is what we do, and the choices we make based on those feelings.

Children throw tantrums and sat mean things because they haven't learned better yet. They don't have the practice or experience. Adults like your mother and mine should have that on lock, but often don't, especially if culture or tradition or social expectations tell them their actions are justified.

If I had to take take guess, I'd say it sounds like your mom gave you this gift with an idea in mind of how she wanted you to react. She probably wanted you to be grateful and praising and sweet, so she could fulfill the role she envisioned for herself, and when you deviated from that picture, she was disappointed. From that perspective, it would seem that she felt slighted, and that she was owed your gratitude, and you were at fault for withholding it.

This perspective makes sense, in an emotionally immature sort of way, but would completely overlook your feelings, which are just as important.

Your exact situation is not one I've been in before, but if I'm correct in my assumptions (which I may not be) then I'd suggest keeping an eye out for other instances of your perspective and feelings being minimized.

Are you often told you are behaving irrationally? That you're over-emotional? That you're self-centered or greedy or entitled? Are you told that you don't remember things or do things as you're told? That you see problems where there aren't any? That you male trouble where there is none? That certain conversations aren't worth having, or that "you're always like this"?

It sounds like you know that something is off. I'd encourage you to keep asking questions and follow your instincts. At the end of the day, your life is your own, no matter where it came from.

[weirdmarioenemies]

I am going to rank all of the Super Mario Galaxies and none of you can stop me

That's right! I'm ranking all of them! All ninety-one of these things! Hi, I'm Mod Hooligon, and you may recognize me as "the mod that posted about Super Paper Mario a lot", but did you know? The Super Mario Galaxy games are maybe my actual favorite Mario games! In fact, I've never even beaten Super Paper Mario! I'm a fraud! But I'm a cute fraud, right?

But I'm not a fraud when it comes to Super Mario Galaxy, because I've 100%'d both games, and have replayed them multiple times over! And when you play some games that much, you start to have opinions. And then you want to subject everyone else to your opinions! So that's what I'm gonna do.

This is gonna be a little Weirdmarioenemies mini-series I run outside of our usual posting schedule, so expect a new part of this list every Sunday, until there's no Galaxies left to cover. Today we'll be tackling all the low-tier Galaxies, because there's not enough of them to warrant making three separate posts for F-tier, D-tier, and C-tier.

Got that? Good. Rankings start under the cut!

91. Sling Pod Galaxy

Game: Super Mario Galaxy Tier: F

Well, something had to be the worst. If you are an ardent Sling Pod Galaxy fan, I am so, so sorry. Let it be known that you are entitled to your own opinion, and that I understand.

But I'm also entitled to my own opinion and my opinion is that Sling Pod Galaxy is Not Very Good! Really, not a lot of the Hungry Luma galaxies from the first game are, we're gonna be covering most of them in this post...

The Sling Pods aren't an awful gimmick in and of themselves, it can be fun to slingshot Mario around, and they're used to great effect in the Tarantox boss fight! But I feel like they can be a bit imprecise, and nowhere does that show more than in Sling Pod Galaxy, where you're required to fling Mario from Sling Pod to Sling Pod with precise timing, and not a lot of wiggle room.

If your aim or timing is just slightly off (and let's face it, it uses motion controls, so it's probably going to be) then you're gonna sling Mario right into the void. There's a cool concept here, but at the end of the day, I'll always find Sling Pod Galaxy more frustrating than fun.

And besides that, it's just not very thematically interesting! It's kinda just cobbled together out of miscellaneous assets, but doesn't manage to make it feel like a Theme the way Space Junk Galaxy does.

90. Snow Cap Galaxy

Game: Super Mario Galaxy Tier: F

Oh look, another Hungry Luma Galaxy! That didn't take long at all.

I feel like most people wouldn't consider the bunny chases the highlights of the Super Mario Galaxy games, and Snow Cap Galaxy is a galaxy that makes you chase three bunnies, all of which start the mission hidden, under a pretty strict time limit. There's a small chamber you can open that you can chase the bunnies into, but in order to open it, you need to activate a number of Flipswitches, most of which are hidden in the snow, which you need to use your cursor to clear out...

I feel like this mission asks too much of you in too little time, and ends up being another one that ends up more frustrating than fun, especially with how inconsistent chasing down the bunnies can actually be! That being said, I'll give it the edge over Sling Pod, since I think it's at least a little more aesthetically interesting. Bunnies hiding in the snow! It's cute.

89. Stone Cyclone Galaxy

Game: Super Mario Galaxy 2 Tier: F

If the Hungry Lumas have the worst galaxies in the first game, then World S has some of the worst in the second. I wouldn't say the track record is nearly as bad, I think Super Mario Galaxy 2's quality is much more consistent all around, but that didn't manage to save Stone Cyclone from escaping the bottom tier...

I like a good challenge, but I like a good challenge, and I don't know if I'd consider Stone Cyclone Galaxy good. It's a repeat of the Stone Cyclone planet from the first game (which I do like!), but with all the Tox Boxes, Thwomps, and moving platforms moving 4 times faster. You're given switches that can temporarily slow everything down, and make everything much more manageable, but since it's all temporary, you better be able to manage the faster version once the timer's up!

I don't know, there's a cool concept here, but I feel everything moves so fast when time isn't slowed down, that making jumps between the moving platforms in particular can be really difficult. And when the Tox Boxes are moving faster than you do, sometimes it feels like there's not much room to move without getting squished soon after!

88. Flipswitch Galaxy

Game: Super Mario Galaxy Tier: D

Yep! Stone Cyclone was the last of the bottom-tiers. Again, there's not really a lot of galaxies in these games I don't like. Now we're at the "I don't necessarily hate them, but also find them kind of pointless" tier!

And no Galaxy feels more pointless to me than Flipswitch Galaxy, which is honestly kind of a joke. Flipswitch Galaxy is One planet. That's right, you get one! This is an entire Galaxy that could easily be a mission in another Galaxy, and even that's being generous. This is a stopgap between two planets in a cooler, more elaborate Galaxy.

Flipswitch Galaxy isn't really frustrating at all, it's probably one of the easiest missions in the entire game, but it's so short and so pointless, that I just wish they did a little more with it, you know? Add a couple more planets, let things escalate a little more, I know you want to keep it easy because of how early in the game it is, but if Flip-Swap Galaxy is any indication, you can do a breezy early-game gimmick galaxy much better than this!

87. Bigmouth Galaxy

Game: Super Mario Galaxy Tier: D

Okay, quick question, how many of you have beaten Bigmouth Galaxy the intended way? I genuinely didn't know until a pretty recent playthrough that there even were Star Chips in this Galaxy. I always just used gravity shenanigans to jump from the top of pool to the other! I thought that's what you were supposed to do, and that the jump was just a little annoying to get right! I'm not sure if I've even ever done this mission the intended way. The jump is just way quicker.

Bigmouth Galaxy is pretty whatever. It sure does exist! I think it's funny that this is a Hungry Luma Galaxy, but Penguru says he likes to come here frequently just to think. He's been a frequent here ever since the galaxy was born five minutes ago!

What do you want me to say about Bigmouth Galaxy. It's a shorter, easier, more mediocre version of Slimy Spring Galaxy, I guess.

86. Drip Drop Galaxy

Game: Super Mario Galaxy Tier: D

I'm just not giving these Hungry Luma galaxies a break, am I? Don't worry Hungry Lumas, you'll do better in Super Mario Galaxy 2.

Anyway, Drip Drop Galaxy is a single planet where you kill a few Gringills with shells, and that's really it. The underwater controls in this game can feel a little janky, so aiming the shells can be a little frustrating, but it's not especially hard, especially if you can find the Red Shells, which retain their homing ability from Mario Kart.

Pretty unremarkable, not especially fun, but I don't dread it the way I do some others, so that's a plus. Apparently this is where Penguru lives.

85. Bowser Jr.'s Lava Reactor

Game: Super Mario Galaxy Tier: D

Wrapping up the D-tiers, we have Bowser Jr.'s Lava Reactor, the most forgettable of the Bowser and Bowser Jr. stages. King Kaliente is a cool boss and all, and I think the sinking lava platforms are a cool shakeup to his fight, but for the final boss of the fifth dome, you kinda think they'd do a bit more, right?

There's not really a lot of buildup to the boss, and the boss itself isn't all that difficult, which makes this mission feel pretty underwhelming. I'm curious if I'd put this higher if it weren't one of the Bowser Jr. stages. My stance is "probably, but not by too much". There's not a lot going on in this galaxy.

84. Boo's Boneyard Galaxy

Game: Super Mario Galaxy Tier: C

I don't know what it says that this is one of the better Hungry Luma galaxies from the first game.

Let's talk positives first! I think it's cool that they give you a rematch against the Spooky Speedster, and I like that it shakes things up so much. The idea of you getting the Boo Mushroom to become more "equal" with the Spooky Speedster is cool, and I like that they further differentiate things by making it a 2D level. That's all pretty cool!

It's just that... I think this mission is really easy. The Spooky Speedster isn't really all that speedy here, and unlike the shortcut during the first race which you kinda have to go out of your way for, this time it's in plain sight, and not hard to reach at all. Besides that, I just don't think the Boo Mushroom is an especially fun powerup to use in a Race. It's a good powerup, make no mistake, but in the context of a race, it feels pretty sluggish...

83. Loopdeeloop Galaxy

Game: Super Mario Galaxy Tier: C

Super Mario Galaxy has a handful of motion-control based minigames, and of the bunch, I think the ray surfing is my least favorite. I don't hate it, I kinda like how wild riding the waves can feel, but at the same time, that wildness combined with the motion controls can make it feel at times like you don't have a lot of control over where you're going, you know?

Loopdeeloop Galaxy is the galaxy that introduces this minigame, and it's fine. I generally prefer its more challenging variant (which we'll see later, but not too much later), but this works well enough as an introduction. It's just kind of a basic version of a minigame I'm not that big a fan of, there's not a lot to say about Loopdeeloop Galaxy.

82. Honeyclimb Galaxy

Game: Super Mario Galaxy Tier: C

As far as single-mission gimmick galaxies go, this one is alright. I like the use of Mandibugs and Meteors to spice things up. Unlike something like the Flipswitch Galaxy, this has a pretty solid sense of escalation, which I like!

That being said, it's still pretty basic, climbing honey walls isn't exactly the most exciting gimmick in the world, so I'm not gonna be that huge on a galaxy built completely around it. I guess the focus on the honey climbing lets it feel a bit more distinct from the other Bee Mushroom galaxies, but it's also easily the weakest of the Bee Mushroom galaxies, so I'm not sure if that's a good thing...

I feel like I don't have much to say about any of these mid-tier Galaxies. Sorry.

81. Grand Finale Galaxy

Game: Super Mario Galaxy Tier: C

Of all the galaxy rankings, I feel like this is one of the ones I feel the least certain about. Part of me feels it should be lower, part of me thinks putting it lower would be unfair, so instead it ends up here!

From a gameplay perspective, Grand Finale Galaxy is not really that interesting at all. There's no challenge, you just grab the Purple Coins, which are all just out there in the open, and that's really it! That's the star! I don't even know if you can die in this galaxy at all.

But like, that feels like the wrong way to assess this galaxy, because it's not meant to be a challenge in the slightest, it's meant to be this nice little reward you get for getting 100% in this game. You beat the game twice over already, so get to enjoy the Star Festival without Bowser rudely interrupting! Get to spend a little more time with all the characters you've met on your journey before being done with the game for good, it's here as a nice little bonus.

That being said, as a Grand Finale, I feel it sort of lacks... grandeur? I dunno. It's cute as a nice little goodbye, but part of me feels they could've done a little more with it.

Don't ask me what! I'm not a game designer, I'm just some autistic girl on the internet talking about a 16 year old video game! Leave me alone!

80. Mario Squared Galaxy

Game: Super Mario Galaxy 2 Tier: C

I'll give Mario Squared Galaxy this: it has one of the best names of any galaxy across these games, and that gotta count for something.

Mario Squared is pretty much just a reused planet from Toy Time Galaxy in the first game, just with the rotating squares swapped out for Flipswitches. And I mean hey, if you're gonna reuse content from any galaxy, Toy Time is a pretty good pick. but also the very nature of being reused content means I'm bumping it down a bit, because eh! We've already seen this before! I don't need a galaxy to be a small part of a better galaxy!

I'm pretty sure this galaxy solely exists so they could bring back the infamous Luigi's Purple Coins mission in Super Mario Galaxy 2, which I guess is fair. That mission is difficult, but it is fun, and I like the twists they add in this game (like the Cosmic Clones, and the fact you have to grab all of them this time)! Fun way to create a new take on one of the first game's most challenging missions.

...But can I really rate a galaxy that highly for redoing something another Galaxy already did? I don't know if I can give Mario Squared Galaxy a super high grade for copying Toy Time Galaxy's homework and changing it a little.

I think it's funny that the objective of this mission is to turn all the blue Flipswitches yellow, so it looks like Mario's SMB1 sprite, but once all the Flipswitches are activated, they all turn green, making the whole thing feel kinda pointless. This is fine because green is a better color than yellow anyway.

79. Hurry-Scurry Galaxy

Game: Super Mario Galaxy Tier: C

Another one of those short gimmick galaxies with only one mission. I think building a galaxy around these disappearing panels is a pretty fun idea. Once you stand on one of them, it's gone forever, so you have to plan your route carefully, but don't spend too much time planning, because all the ground is disappearing panels. It creates a fun dynamic, that's true to the galaxy's name! There's a solid chance your route will be a little off, so you might have to make some big leaps to grab notes you may have missed. It's cool, I like it!

But not like, that much. It's still a pretty small galaxy all things considered. This one gets a little buildup before the end, which is nice, but it's not much buildup, so the whole experience ends up feeling a little short.

Not helping is the fact they repeat this mission later in the game, but more challenging, and in a galaxy that has other things going on. That does subtract from Hurry-Scurry Galaxy a bit, I feel.

78. Sand Spiral Galaxy

Game: Super Mario Galaxy Tier: C

I know I've mentioned multiple times in this post how mediocre the Hungry Luma galaxies in the first game are, but for emphasis: this is the second best one, and it's in C-Tier. Don't feel too bad, Sand Spiral Galaxy. You'll still outshine most of your siblings at the family reunion. At least if you're ignoring those pesky Super Mario Galaxy 2 Hungry Luma galaxies.

This Galaxy gives you a choice between the Bee Mushroom and the Boo Mushroom, and I pretty much always pick the Boo Mushroom I'm pretty sure. There's obstacles for both on the way, so it's not like one's strictly "better" than the other, but I always appreciate the extra control the Boo Mushroom gives me here. After a short tunnel, you lose your powerup, are sent to a spiral planet spinning around a moon, where you grab a Rainbow Star and run through some mines to grab the Star at the end.

It's a pretty short mission that doesn't really feel like it knows what it wants to do, but at the very least, I appreciate that it gives you multiple options, the visual at the end is pretty striking, and making big jumps during the spiral as a Speedrun Strat can be pretty satisfying.

77. Boss Blitz Galaxy

Game: Super Mario Galaxy 2 Tier: C

If you couldn't tell already, a lot of World S in Super Mario Galaxy 2 is reused content, and that's a lot of why these galaxies are scoring so low. Boss Blitz Galaxy is a string of five boss fights from the first game in a row, which I guess makes it a bit interesting in the context of the sequel, given none of these bosses show up in the main quest, so if this is your only Super Mario Galaxy game, you kinda gotta figure them all out on the fly.

Thankfully, most of these boss fights are still pretty fun, though again, they're all reused so you're not really getting much new here. The timer challenge is sort of teetering on the edge between being "challenging in a frustrating way" and "challenging in a fun way" for me. Speedrunning all the boss fights can be really fun, but none of them really have shortcuts the way the bosses in say, Super Mario Odyssey do, and some of the RNG in the Bouldergeist fight can make the challenge feel a bit inconsistent (even if that IS the best of the bosses), so sometimes your pace feels a bit out of your control.

It also feels weird to have both Dino Piranha and Fiery Dino Piranha, it's kinda redundant, though I do like having them as the bookends, I guess.

76. Twisty Trials Galaxy

Game: Super Mario Galaxy 2 Tier: C

Woah, reusing content from Super Mario Sunshine now? Slow down, World S!

For what it's worth, reusing Sunshine content is a bit more interesting than reusing Galaxy content, because it's a different game with different controls and different physics and whatnot. Still, it's not like Twisty Trials Galaxy is that interesting. It's a series of progressively more difficult rotating platforms that you have to keep your balance on, and that's really it, though I do like the comet challenge where they move twice as fast, and you have to use the Cloud Flower to keep on pace. That's pretty neat.

I wish they kept the music from Sunshine. I like the weird a capella version of the Super Mario Bros. Overworld theme way more than Super Mario 2007.

75. Loopdeeswoop Galaxy

Game: Super Mario Galaxy Tier: C

"The Galaxy's Greatest Wave". I mean, there's only two ray surfing galaxies across both games, this one and Loopdeeloop, so is there really that much competition?

That being said, yeah, I like this more challenging version. I know that the ray surfing minigame still isn't really my favorite (it's in C-tier for a reason!) but having a more difficult course I think brings out some of the best aspects, like how wild it feels to control! And also some of the worst aspects, like how wild it feels to control! It's still as much of a double-edged sword as ever, just a bit more extreme due to the more extreme course.

That being said, since it's more challenging, that makes finishing it feel a lot more satisfying, and I'd never say it really feels unfair. Sure, falling off can be frustrating given how difficult it can be to control, but when it's all done, I end up feeling more "yeah, I did it :D" than "oh thank god that's over with", which I think is the important distinction between an F-tier and a C-tier.

Don't take that as meaning I'm in love with this galaxy, though. It's still here for a reason.

74. Bonefin Galaxy

Game: Super Mario Galaxy Tier: C

The cooler Drip Drop Galaxy.

That's really pretty much all this one is, it's Drip Drop Galaxy again but this time it's a boss fight, and it's a bit more exciting because of it. Heck, you need to beat Drip Drop Galaxy to unlock this one, so the resemblance isn't unintentional!

Since it's pretty much Drip Drop Galaxy again, it suffers a lot of the same issues that Galaxy has, but I'm not gonna pretend it doesn't get boosted a lot from the Style Points, though I also think having a single large target to hit ends up feeling a lot better than several smaller targets. Aiming your shells feels a lot easier, but since it's a boss fight, there's also a better sense of escalation here.

Still, it's pretty much just the boss fight, and I mean, being a slightly better version of a D-tier Galaxy isn't exactly something I'll sing my highest praises about. If nothing else, at least it has a killer atmosphere.

73. Sea Slide Galaxy

Game: Super Mario Galaxy Tier: C

Wrapping up the C-tier is Sea Slide Galaxy, the worst of the "big" Galaxies from the first game. To quote myself from earlier in the same post, "Well, something had to be the worst." But also not quite like that since it's nowhere near as bad.

The biggest issue with Sea Slide Galaxy is there's really not an awful lot of diversity in its missions. Of the six missions here, three of them are basically "swim in a loop around the galaxy," just with slightly different distances. The Silver Star mission, thankfully, fares a lot better, as does the Improved Version of Hurry-Scurry Galaxy (here it is!) but the last of the missions is one of the boring Purple Coin missions. Mod Hooligon's Tip: If you start a Purple Coin mission and it doesn't have this banger, I'm Sorry.

The galaxy definitely has a unique layout, but there's not really much to do in the water besides swim in a circle, since every mission that doesn't involve swimming in a circle usually has you ignoring the water outright. Would this galaxy be better if it had more swimming? I dunno. As stated, the underwater controls in this game can be a bit finnicky, so maybe I should be glad it's either swim in a circle or don't swim at all.

And that's it for today's post! Do you agree with my opinions? Do you disagree? If you're a Sling Pod Galaxy fan, make some noise!

And if you're looking for the B-Tier galaxies, you're in luck, because you can find those here!

[biisexualemma]

pining pt.2. peter parker

word count: 3.3k

warnings: explosion, some injury detail i think but not a lot or graphic at all, soft, fluff, sweet interactions

requested: yesyesyes

plot: you can't keep your crush on peter a secret any longer

a/n: sorry it took me, not even exaggerating, three years to write and publish this, that is truly so uncool of me and i deeply apologise to those of you who asked for this so long ago. anyway it's here and i am happy with it so i hope you like it!

part 1 / masterlist

"i bombed that exam," you huffed, your face screwing up in frustration as you walked side by side with m.j. down the school hallway. "did you see question sixteen? what was that about? i don't think we even studied that this semester?" you were annoyed with yourself, because you knew you hadn't studied as hard as you should have for that exam.

"yeah, i saw it, i just took the same exam," m.j. furrowed her brows at you but you were too in your own head to care about her sarcasm. being m.j.'s friend for so many years meant that you tended to tune out the sarcasm that was always dripping from her voice. "i wouldn't worry about it, you always do well, it's like your thing. being smart at everything."

you shook your head, you were convinced you messed up that paper.

ever since your late night netflix session with peter, you'd been even more in your head than usual. you hated being this distracted. it was only because you had to keep your feelings to yourself, you had never been very good at keeping secrets, and this was too big a secret to be keeping to yourself. it was driving you crazy that he didn't know.

 it was now monday, you hadn't seen peter since you fell asleep on him and he snuck back out your window. you had woken up the next day in an empty bed, with a text message from peter saying he had to run and that he'd see you in school.

you hadn't heard from him again, and you had yet to see him in school. you had to tell him. you had to tell him or you felt like you might combust. and you had finals to be worrying over, not a boy. if you got it off your chest, whether he felt the same or not, you knew you could at least focus better on your day to day. you were tired of avoiding him and pushing him away to keep a secret. he had to know.

-

you had colluded with michelle during gym and she, too, thought you coming clean to peter was a good idea. you were pretty sure she was just sick of talking to you and you not taking anything in that she was saying, which was happening more and more often, so you understood. 

only, you hadn't actually seen peter all day to speak to him.

you spotted a familiar mop of black hair across the hallway at the end of the day, jogging over to meet ned at his locker. if anyone would know of peter's whereabouts it was his righthand man.

"ned!" you touched his shoulder, approaching him from behind, startling him a little as he jumped away from your touch. "sorry--" you apologised quickly when he mumbled shit y/n under his breath. "i just wanted to know if you'd seen peter?"

his face contorted for a second before furrowing his brows. "uh, peter? he just left-- i think he said something about mr stark? i don't know," you could tell he was lying, ned was always covering for peter, but you didn't push him. you just nodded.

"right, well, if you see him, tell him i need to talk to him?" he nodded and you backed away from him to leave. "i'll see you tomorrow!" you called, whipping out your phone and dialling peter's number as you moved down the crowded hallway. 

it rang out, you let out an exasperated sigh. why was he all of sudden so hard to track down? you waited for the beep before leaving a message.

pete, call me back i need to talk to you-- can you meet me at delmar's? i'll be there at seven-- just call me

the one time you were actively seeking for him and he was nowhere to be found. you huffed, dragging yourself home to put some effort into studying before you'd meet up with peter later.

-

you tucked your hands in your pockets to conserve some of your warmth in the cold new york air, your feet speeding along the pavement as you took the short walk to delmar's. you had gotten a text from peter shortly after you left your voicemail saying he'd meet you there.

you were regretting not wearing more layers as you shivered, making your way down the street, delmar's was in sight, the light shining from inside guided you towards the shop. you had been craving a sandwich all day. and you thought, even if your conversation with peter went terribly, at least you'd still get a sandwich from delamar's out of it. it wouldn't be all bad.

there was no sign of peter, but you approached anyway, waiting outside in hopes he wouldn't make you wait in the cold much longer. you checked the time on your phone, it was a few minutes past seven. you were sure he'd be here soon.

you tucked your phone away in your pocket, lifting your eyes up, widening them when you saw a commotion in the bank across the street. your mouth hung open. you made out one of the figures to be spider-man, he was swinging around, fighting a group of-- of-- avengers? you squinted, watching the fight unfold with curiosity. you'd never seen the web-slinger in action before, you were intrigued. you couldn't wait 'till peter got here, he'd love this.

"hey-- mr delmar-- have you seen this--?" just as you called into the shop for the owner to come check this out, there was a loud shattering noise, causing you to jolt in shock. before you knew what was happening, half the shop was on fire, you thrown backwards into the wreckage.

peter watched the weapon fire, near splitting mr delmar's shop in two from across the street. his eyes widened in panic, abandoning his previous task and running over to his favourite sandwich shop that was now in flames. he remembered his plans to meet you here at seven-- he hoped you'd been late arriving.

you groaned, your head splitting, ears ringing and you could hardly make out what was happening with your vision distorted by a cloud of grey smoke. you spasmed into a cough fit as you breathed in the smoke surrounding you, instinctively you pulled at the sleeve of your jacket and covered your mouth in an attempt to keep your airways clear.

"mr delmar?" you tried to call out, your voice muffled behind the material covering it, pushing yourself up off the ground that was now covered in rubble.

"you alright, mr delmar?" peter checked in, his arm wrapped around the older yank as he guided him out of the wreckage with a level of care reserved for the owner of his favourite sandwich shop. he nodded, he hurled over trying to take deep breaths, his hands propped onto his knees. "was it just you in there?"

he shook his head. peter thought to you immediately before mr delmar even said anything. "y/n," he spluttered out, coughing up the smoke he'd inhaled. "a regular-- she was standing right there," he had pointed to where the door used to be but now in it's place was a gaping hole. peter was half listening to mr delmar who was now wailing about the state of his store, bystanders had started to crowd and sirens sounded in the distance. but this was all background noise to peter now.

you could just start to make out the floor beneath you as the smoke began to ease up a bit, you guided yourself to the commotion you could hear coming from just ahead of you. "mr delmar?" you tried calling again, hoping he wasn't caught under any of the rubble somewhere, hoping he was ok. "mr del-- ow!" you looked down at your feet where you had tripped when you heard something yelp back at you. the bodega cat, covered in soot and dirt. "hi, kitty," you cooed, leaning down and scooping him up in your arms as you continued to navigate your way forward. "have you seen mr delmar?" you spoke to the cat, who only meowed in response. "right."

"y/n?" you heard your name being called, your ears pricking up, the cat in your arms attention had been caught too. "y/n, are you in there?" you knew that voice.

"peter?!" you called back, coughing as you inhaled more of the smoke surrounding you. "pete?"

the cat cried again. a faucet shot open across the room, you let out a yelp at the noise as water began to blast everywhere. "where are you?" you called out again, losing your patience and your nerve a bit now.

"y/n?" the voice was suddenly right in front of you and then before you could react a body thudded into yours. you yelped again, the cat also startled, and stumbled backwards, feeling two hands grip your arms, keeping you in your place.

arms clothed in red and blue, your eyes trailed upwards, widening as they looked over at the superhero now standing in front of you also covered in soot and dirt. "spider-man?" 

there was a loud crack that came from above where you stood, your eyes trailing up to the ceiling where the plaster had started to crumble from the damage. peter pulled you towards him, forcing you to duck down and covering you with himself as part of the ceiling fell down and would have fallen on top of you. "c'mon, we need to move," he guided you out of the building, one arm wrapped round your shoulders, his free hand covering your head.

you took a deep breath as you finally exited the building, back into the cold new york air, clutching the cat in your arms still. your head was spinning, he shifted to stand in front of you, his hands placed on each of your shoulders. your eyes were wide, brows furrowed together, your breathing growing heavier as the superhero checked you over for injuries.

"how're you feelin'?" he asked, one hand gripping your chin as he guided your face to turn to one side and then the other. you stood with your mouth slightly open, breath fanning out in front of you in the cold air, you nodded slightly, kind of coherently. his eyes, or the eye shapes cut out from his mask, squinted at you. "y/n, i need you to use your words."

"yeah," you spoke softly. "i'm ok-- i think," you shuddered, the only thing keeping you warm was the cat you clung to your chest. maybe you were just confused when you thought you'd heard peter before. maybe you had hit your head, or the smoke made you a bit delirious, or maybe the ringing distorted your hearing. that must be it. 

"my cat!" mr delmar's voice pulled you out of your thoughts and spider-man's hands slipped away from you as mr delmar lifted up his cat up out of your arms. he wrapped a free arm around you, pulling you into a quick hug, giving your shoulder a squeeze. "thank you, i'm glad you're ok."

"yeah, you too, mr delmar," he gave your arm a rub, before releasing you. "sorry about your shop," you felt bad. you knew it was out of your control but you couldn't help but feel for the man who had served you sandwiches nearly every day for the past ten years and who now had to rebuild his livelihood.

"no one got hurt, you're ok, i'm ok, cat's ok. we're ok," you nodded, he was right. "thanks to this guy," he grabbed spider-man by the shoulder, giving him a squeeze just like he had done with you. "thank you, spider-man."

"of course," he patted mr delmar on the back, beginning to feel the eyes of the bystanders surrounding this situation and the sirens growing closer. "listen, i gotta' dash, people to save, muggers to stop, you know the drill."

mr delmar began ushering him away, insisting that he go back out and get back to work. you watched the man in the suit carefully, standing still as he back to back away from you both. he gave you a slight nod before shooting off into the skyline again.

- 

you were startled by a soft knock on your window, your head jolted towards the noise, spotting the familiar brown mop of hair crouched outside on the fire escape. you let him in, he climbed in clumsily with a sense of urgency. "hey, i've been calling you,"

"sorry," you mumbled, retreating to your bed where you had been ready to crash only minutes ago. 

"i saw... i saw the news," he ducked trying to get a good look at you but you were avoiding his stare. "something came up-- did you-- were you-- are you--"

"i'm fine," you nodded, pulling at the hem of your shirt, sitting yet again, uncomfortably, in front of your best friend in your pyjamas. "no one got hurt."

peter moved to sit next to you, eyes focused on your face and why you wouldn't look at him. "are you sure?" his eyebrows furrowed together, eyes travelling to where you had your hands resting on your lap, fingers fidgeting. he worried about you. "hey, talk to me."

"i'm sure," you nodded slightly, turning so you could meet his eyes and reassure him. your hands still fidgeting he noticed. you shot him a small smile. "pete, it's ok. i'm just tired, it's been a really long day."

he remembered you calling for him earlier, the strain in your voice, the panic he felt when he couldn't find you straight away. he remembered the way you looked at him, with big eyes, full of relief and a hint of confusion.

he nodded, releasing a deep breath. "i'm sorry i didn't show at delmar's-- something came up-- it was stupid and i'm sorry i wasn't-- that i couldn't--  and i should've just--"

"peter, i love you," you cut him short. you couldn't hold your breath around him any longer. life was too short for keeping secrets. "that's what i wanted to talk to you about at delmar's-- before... everything... and spiderman."

peter's mouth hung open, his eyes locked with yours. your eyes were soft and languid, his wide and stunned, there was no denying you were awake this time. "what?" he spoke barely above a whisper, unable to think of what else to say.

"i met spiderman," you clarified. "he reminded me of you in a weird way actually," you hummed, not breaking eye contact with peter who was sat closer to you than he remembered being when he first sat down. his palms grew sweaty, he rubbed them against his pants in an attempt to calm down. "which was weirdly comforting amidst the chaos."

"oh-- that's cool i guess," he spoke in a bit of a daze. he hadn't expected you to come right out and say any of this, his head was in a bit of a spin. he had been waiting to hear you say those words again since the other night, and now here you were saying them, to him, and he couldn't think of anything to say back. 

"you don't have to say it back, or feel it i guess-- i've had a lot of time to think about this and this is the first you're hearing of it because i suppress my feelings until i feel like my heads going to explode," you were rambling at this point, a little nervous that he hadn't directly addressed it yet. you didn't expect him to feel the same way, you had seen him around liz, it was obvious to everyone that he'd been crushing on her forever. you had to tell him for your own peace of mind, you had finals to finish without the weight of this secret on your shoulders. "and my head was about to explode, pete, i'm not even sure i passed my history quiz today because i couldn't get my mind off of all of this. which is so stupid."

"you're not stupid, not even a little bit," peter shook his head. "and this isn't the first i'm hearing of this, either."

you expression soured, disgruntled and a little annoyed, "oh god, did mj tell you? that's so not cool, we talked about this-- i told her i would--"

"no, no, not mj," you paused, your expression unfolding, head tilting slightly as you hung on his every word. peter's eyes flickered down to your lips where they'd hung open, slightly parted after his interruption. "the other night, you were half asleep, before i left. you said it then."

you sighed. "well, that's kind of embarrassing."

he shook his head. "no, not embarrassing," his eyes glued to your face, unable to look away, the anticipation and a bit of confusion lining your expression. "confusing and complicated, but not embarrassing."

"confusing and complicated," you repeated, eyes trailing away from where they'd been looked on his for quite a while. "got it, kinda," maybe he was right, maybe this was confusing and complicated and maybe you had just opened up a can of worms. you couldn't take it back now that you'd said it, and you couldn't determine whether you wanted to or not.

"you're my best friend, is what i meant," he tried to clarify but it wasn't really helping. "and i didn't let myself think about you that way because i didn't want to ruin anything," he continued. your eyes unable to shift away from him again, your chest felt like it might sink the way he was going, you had prepared yourself for this, it was ok. "until the other night and now i haven't been able to think of you in any other way."

you felt your cheeks grow warm, eyes flickering between his, his darting down to your lips again uncontrollably this time. "what are you saying, pete?" you spoke barely above a whisper, unable to will yourself to speak any louder for fear you might break the bubble you two currently sat in. you were no longer thinking about your history quiz, or delmar's or even that you were sat in front of your best friend in your pyjamas. you only thought of peter and his soft brown eyes that never left your face.

"i really want to kiss you," he matched the level of your voice exactly, feeling yourself drawn closer to him. "so bad i feel like my head might explode," a small smile cracked onto his lips but you only caught a glimpse before you pressed your lips to his. his lips were soft but desperate, his hands moved to your waist, tugging a little to urge you to move closer, and you did until you were close enough to be sitting on his lap.

you had to retreat to catch your breath but you could feel your face flushed, running a hand through your hair, trailing down to touch your lips. one hand remained on your waist and the other slipped down to land on your thigh, slightly exposed from the bed shorts you were wearing. you didn't think it'd feel quite this good, his lips, his hands, his eyes on you. this was your best friend peter but this was different and it was good.

"how's your head feeling?" you breathed out a laugh, your lips curving upwards into a small smile.

"better," he gave a small nod, mimicking the smile on your lips. "yours?"

"a little dizzy," you admitted, never losing the curve in your lips even when peter's faltered. "in a good way, not a concussion way," you reassured, his features relaxed slightly at this confirmation, quietening his mind.

he leaned forward just a touch, your bodies still pretty entangled, his forehead leaning against yours and letting himself sit there with you for a minute or two. "listen, there's something else i should probably tell you before we do this.."

you retracted ever so slightly, remaining close to him still. you nodded gently, "what is it?"

"ok, remember you said earlier that spider-man reminded you of me?" you nodded again, eyebrows tugged together in thought. you just kissed him and he's thinking about spider-man? "well that would be because i am spider-man."

taglist:

@wildflower-cherry

@xoxohollands

@shunna

@eridanuswave

[fromthepinnacle2thepit]

hihi <3 can I request some headcanons for mountain with a s/o (gn) who is just,, chronically fatigued because I am,, going through it rn :(

exhausted but can never sleep, joint problems, forgetfulness, clumsy

all those kinds of things if you don't mind <33 have a great day !!

𝘔𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘵𝘢𝘪𝘯 𝘹 𝘤𝘩𝘳𝘰𝘯𝘪𝘤𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘧𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘨𝘶𝘦𝘥! 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘥𝘦𝘳 hc

pairings: mountain ghoul x gn! reader

warnings: descriptions of pain (from joint problems), frustration

authors note: hello! i tried to do a little research on chronic fatigue before i wrote this! if it’s inaccurate i apologize. this is also my first time writing for a ghoul! and i don’t know a bunch about mountain so i really tried! anyways, enjoy!! take care of yourself!

• Ok so i think mainly his way of taking care of you is just doing things completely unexpectedly and really without much of an explanation.

• like think about it-

• you’re laying on the couch one day, heating pad on the joints that hurt the most

• AND BOOM

• mountain appears out of nowhere with a steamy warm cup of herbal tea

• and yes, he did research on how the certain herbs would help, what their health benefits were, and if they were of help to people with chronic fatigue

• or one day, you’re around doing chores, but you’re dropping things and your muscles feel so sore

• THEN ONCE AGAIN BOOM

• Mountain is there, giving you muscle exercises to try to help, and offering a massage

• if you’re having a day where it’s really bad, and it’s hard to get out of bed, he will…

• BOOM

• you guessed it!

• he’ll show up with a care package. it’s filled with loose and comfy clothing, a large water bottle, a weighted blanket (if it helps), an ice pack, and a extra heating bad

• then some of his own clothes

• ALSO if you have muscle pain that lessens when you put warmth on it (like heating pads), cuddling with him would help a lot

• in my opinion, ghouls would be SUPER warm, like furnaces. huge furnaces.

• so if you cuddle with him, it might help.

• if you have really bad muscle pain that can get so bad it causes mobility issues, he’ll try to get you a shower chair, and he’ll gently wash your hair for you, or help you in any way

• he’ll make sure you’re getting plenty of rest

• if you can’t sleep, he’ll stay with you. he’ll help you with tasks if you didn’t feel up to doing them

• if you’re feeling really down about things, he’ll remind you that it’s ok to be clumsy, and that you’re not being lazy. he’s proud of you, and wants you to be as comfortable as possible.

authors note: hello! i’m so sorry if i portrayed chronic fatigue incorrectly in any way! i do not know very much about it, but i did try, and did research. if i was incorrect or used any stereotypes i deeply apologize and would like correction! thank you!! take care of yourselves!

[puffin-smoke]

redactedtober 12!! today is dealer's choice, so I'll gladly take this as an opportunity to ramble about my OCs.

Dealer's Choice; Bernadette Popovski and her Circus!!

(and sweetheart)(I talk a lot during this one, sorry!)

[F4A] Reopening The Case on Your Infuriating Illusory Ringleader

Bernadette's Circus has always walked a fine line in terms of keeping covert. It showed off the full extent of the empowered's powers while keeping it's largely unempowered audience, although there were a few shock and elation daemons who regularly visited their shows, none the wiser. It caused the Department many a headache. So the Circus was put under strict surveillance and the investigation of whatever Detective was bullheaded enough to think that they might be the one to put the Circus under.

Naturally, Sweetheart took the case.

They never found anything. Every audience member was astonished by the incredible special effects and skillful performers; the way the lion tamer could hold his head in between the lion's jaws without even flinching, the escape artist that was in chains one moment and roaming the audience the next, the acrobat who seemed to walk on air.

All they got for their troubles was a mountain of paperwork and too much time spent with the infuriating Bernadette Popovski.

"Oh, please, love- call me Bernie. Everyone does."

Sweetheart never did take that advice, and more often referred to her as "that cocky little shit". Not to her face. That would be against protocol.

So after months of getting nowhere and a perpetual headache from trying to get a straight answer out of the illusory, the case was dropped. That was the only case Sweetheart never solved.

"If this whole- detective thing falls through, feel free to give me a call. I'm sure we could find a place for you here."

It took everything they had not to deck her right then and there, and just walk out of the tent. It took even more to push their frustration and humiliation down and move on with their life, to forget that goddamn circus.

Four years passed. They moved onto different cases, different people to be annoyed at. Bernadette and her stupid smile and Russian accent faded into the deepest recesses of their mind.

Until they heard about something. An incident at the Circus. A dead audience member.

The case was back on, and this time they were going to close it.

"Detective. I wish I could say I am surprised."

It was, once again, nearly impossible to get anything out of them. Her voice had taken on a new edge, a farcry from her casual, lilting tone all those years ago. This one was defensive, tired. Now Sweetheart held all the cards, no more grasping at straws.

"I'll tell you what I told the human officer. I was debuting a new performer, a singer. Partway through an audience member fell over. By the time I got over there, they had died."

She had decided it had been a heart attack and that was all she knew. The performer, a sonal energetic by the sound of it, was holed up in her tent and Bernadette's voice took on a deadly edge when they asked to be taken to her.

"She's been through enough, she doesn't need you pestering her."

Apparently doing their job was pestering. The conversation went almost nowhere from there, and they were able to ascertain very little else. An audience member had tried to perform CPR, and clearly failed. The lion tamer, a telepath the name of Caleb, had seen the victim collapse and gone to tell Bernadette. They didn't get any further than that, but it was a start.

It was more than they'd gotten four years ago.

The ringleader didn't object as heavily to them speaking to Caleb. She was even somewhat helpful, directing them to where the telepath would probably be. But it was not without a warning.

"I understand, Detective. Go ask your questions. But, what's the phrase- my circus, my monkeys. So please don't tap the glass."

Cocky bastard couldn't even bothered to not seem suspicious during a murder investigation.

[MM4A] Interrogating Two Stubborn Circus Performers

Apparently Bernadette had trained her people well. They were just as tight lipped as she was.

They clearly knew Sweetheart had been coming, along with what that might mean for their circus; as they made their way through the rows of tents and caravans dozens of eyes had followed them, along with a a trail of whispers just loud enough for them to overhear. When they found Caleb he wasn't alone; sat a few feet away a man was giving them the death glare while simultaneously looking at Caleb like a kicked puppy. They cocked their eyebrow at that, to which the telepath laughed.

"Oh, sorry about Aslan. He's just a little bit antsy, I'm sure you understand."

When they remarked that he looked like he was about to bite their head off, he just grinned at them and turned towards the shifter. They were pretty sure he was the only one smiling in that whole field.

"Don't worry, he'd never. I'm living proof of that- hey babe! You can go, I'll meet you by the ticket booth, alright?"

That seemed to calm him down; he nodded, got up from where he was sat, and made his way over to the pair. Eyes moderately less murderous, he kissed the telepath goodbye and began to stalk through the rows of tents, checking back over his shoulder every now and again, somehow making eye contact with Sweetheart every time.

Thus the interrogation began. And while Caleb was more friendly than his boss, he was certainly no more helpful. Each question was artfully dodged or optimistically spun.

"You want to know about Bernie? Hell- she's family to me. To all of us really, even Aslan. He's a big softie, would never admit it."

His story lined up neatly with Bernadette's. He's seen a disturbance in the crowd and gone to tell her about it, since she was more experienced healer than he was, but by the time she'd made her way over there, the victim was already gone. It had been too late. The audience had been quickly cleared out after that and emergency services had been called, for all the good they could do.

As they pressed for information on the new performer, his smile faltered. Only for a moment or so, almost imperceptibly, but it was stark in Sweetheart's mind.

"Oh- well, I really think it was a spot of bad luck. They'd been singing, putting their all into it, and that person just happened to- well."

He laughed nervously, his fingers twitching at his sides.

"Look, I really should go find Aslan. We're supposed to be practising, do you mind if I go? I really have nothing else to say."

Before they could reply he was already halfway across the field, still grinning, but the smile quivering at the edges.

"Good luck, Detective! Sorry I couldn't have been more helpful!"

And with that he was gone.

And they were no closer to piecing things together.

Shit.

Surely the singer wouldn't mind if they just popped into her tent, asked a few questions. And if Popovski said not to do it, then they basically had to.

It took a few minutes of searching but they eventually found the tent, on the farthest reaches of the field, the amount of tents slowly thinning out as they approached. They hadn't necessarily meant to eavesdrop, but who were they to complain if their footfalls were particularly quiet, or the thrum of distant conversation muffled the sound of them stepping on a branch just as well as cloaking would.

"I know- it's okay. I know you didn't do anything, nothing that happened was your fault."

Sweetheart held their breath. The brittle way Bernadette spoke was so alien to her, it's previous edge still there but now akin to shattered glass. There was a gentleness to it, a tenderness.

"I'm going to protect you. I'll protect everyone."

Sweetheart wondered how far they'd go to do that. How much they'd cover up. How much they would sacrifice.

"I promise you, my Magnum Opus."

[suddencolds]

sending u a star!! ⭐️ sorry i wanted to go thru and pick a specific fic but im too sleepy lol but any yvescent piece u had thoughts on :D

[from Fanfic Writers - Director's Cut]

hello!!! THANK YOU N, IT MADE ME REALLY HAPPY TO RECEIVE THIS 🥹🥹🥹

I also realize am responding to this like 2 months late :') I thought for a long time on which fic to comment on, and now that I've posted Atypical Occurrence pt. 2, I thought I might as well write out my thoughts on it while they're still fresh and bc it's close to my heart (I hope that's okay hehe)

—

⚠️❗️ Warning that I will be attaching snippets from my deleted drafts below!! Please read the published installment before you proceed to read this post. This is a little embarrassing... all I can say is that those drafts were deleted for a reason 🥴

—

There’s a grocery store that’s a ten minute drive from Vincent’s apartment. 

I rewrote this scene... 3 or 4 times? It gave me sooo much trouble 😭 I think in the first draft Vincent actually tears up tasting Yves's cooking. (I know, Vincent, I want Yves to cook for me too 😭❗️)

Terrible (ugh 😭) first draft screenshot under the cut (screenshot = old draft, indented quote = current draft):

(Yves pulling up a chair at the end... you can tell he is totally at a loss on what to do 😭 and I, too, was at a loss on what to do)

I wrote this ^, and I was like... this moment just feels unearned? I personally despise outlining + I love going in (mostly) blind. Sometimes the first draft works out of the box, and in this case, the first draft (and the second draft, and the third draft) were all soooo bad that I literally had to take a month-long break to regain my confidence 😭

Anyways! I knew right away that Y was going to cook something for V (it's mentioned here and there throughout the series that he is a really good cook 😭 And in part 3 of Fool Me Twice, Yves promises to make Vincent something more ambitious than hot chocolate. He's finally kept his promise now, 12 installments later 🙇‍♀️ )

From draft 2, there was only one scene which I was sure I was going to include in the final draft, aka, spared from the recycling bin. (But I just checked the final draft and it's nowhere to be seen?? Interesting.)

I would have managed fine on my own.

On this (deleted) scene, and more broadly: I think it's important to me that Yves recognizes that Vincent is self-sufficient in many ways: when Vincent says he will be fine alone, he is telling the truth. Yves doesn't have to stay—he recognizes this too, when he heads for the door in the published draft.

Still, Yves stays, of course—initially, because he insists, and later, because Vincent asks :)

“…You won’t leave unless I eat, then,” Vincent says. He says it evenly enough that it barely registers as a question. Yves smiles at him. It’s not a wrong conclusion. “Exactly,” he says.

It was really, really fun writing the differences between caretaker!Vincent (in Fool Me Twice pt. 5) and caretaker!Yves 😊 I usually don't like to say too much on the end of character analysis, bc I like my work to be interpreted as it is: the text is canon, and everything I'm saying here is just me yapping on about my headcanons. (I have been roasted for saying this by a dear friend of mine, probably rightfully so:)

With that disclaimer: Vincent to me (I can only speculate, etc) is a very no-bullshit caretaker (he likes to enforce whatever will lead most directly to the person's recovery; he actually worries a lot, but his worry often manifests as frustration/snappishness), whereas Yves is a lot more permissive and, for the most part, manages his stress—he is the eldest sibling, after all! I think he does what he can to make it a more tolerable experience :)

“So this is just a Yves thing.” “What? Showing consideration for my friends?”  “Showing consideration is one thing,” Vincent answers. “You could have left after dropping off the files. You would still have been showing your consideration.” “I guess that’s true. But at that point, I was already here,” Yves says, with a shrug. “It seemed logical to check up on you.” “Well, now you’ve checked up on me,” Vincent says. “So you can go.” Yves supposes this is true.

Vincent takes things very literally (and I think he's actually quite aware of the social niceties around these kinds of things, which is in part why he is so skeptical to assume that Yves means anything more.)

There’s a hand on his sleeve, tugging. Yves goes very still. When Vincent notices what he’s done, alarm flashes through his expression, and he pulls his hand away as if he’s burned.  “Sorry,” he murmurs, again. And just like that, he’s back to how he always is—his expression perfectly, carefully neutral, in a way that can only be constructed. “I’m sorry.” But Yves doesn’t forget what he’s seen. “You can go.”

This scene means a lot to me!! It took a loooot of editing to hammer into place (the doc I wrote it on is titled "fixing this scene would FIX ME" haha). I think this is the first time Vincent has actively sought out Yves's comfort 😭 And he regrets it almost as soon as he's said it, because he does not do things without a good justification, and wanting something—even wanting it badly—does not feel like a sufficient justification to him. But give Yves an inch and he will take a mile!! He will take a hundred miles!! That is just the kind of person that Yves is.

I was talking with some friends previously about how I wanted to write Vincent reaching out for Yves. How I wanted Vincent to, through the haze of fever, cross a line that he'd previously not allowed himself to cross :') I think it is a time-old trope to have someone, in their feverish delirium, utter something embarrassing and utterly uncharacteristic of them, or divulge something that has been difficult for them to say.

This whole time drafting, I was thinking, how can I set up a moment like that and have it feel earned? How badly would he have to be feeling? What kind of setup would justify getting past his 590859 mental defenses? (I do not like to outline, but sometimes I do have an emotional beat that I have in mind, and then I have to work backwards to figure out the setup. This took SO much working back from, and I really thought about it for very long). I was almost sure that Vincent would regret it immediately after too 😭

Yves opens his arms out in offering, tries on a smile. “I’ve been told I give good hugs. Good enough to cure all ailments, obviously.”

Ahh, so Y offering V a hug is inspired by a fic I read 6 years ago, where a character offers another a hug as a joke and then the other character surprises them by taking it. Yves is really offering here, but I think he recognizes that joking about it will make it easier for Vincent to accept 😭

Yves has hugged a fair share of people in his life. He doesn’t think he’d be able to list them all if he were asked to. It’s different, though, being so close to Vincent—so close that Yves can reach out and let his hair fall through his fingertips. He can lift up his palm and feel the rigid line of his spine, the slope of his shoulders; he could reach out and trace the dip of his wrist, the form of his hand. Vincent’s chin digs slightly into his left shoulder. His nose is turned slightly into Yves’s neck—like this, he is almost perfectly still. Yves can feel the warm brush of air against his neck whenever Vincent exhales. He is so close that Yves is afraid, for a moment, that he might hear how badly his heart is racing.

I have nothing to say about this paragraph except that I edited it for like 40 minutes straight.

Last thing!!

“We had a habit of keeping the heat off, in the winters, and closing the windows.”

The scene near the end (where Vincent tells Yves about his childhood) is actually the scene which came the most easily to me. I also did not write it last; I jumped around. It took me around 1.5 hours. (By comparison, simply editing the scene before it took 11 😵‍💫)

I did always intend for Vincent to disclose... well, /something/ about himself. (You can tell that when I plan, that's really as far as I plan LOL)

Anyways, when Vincent wakes Yves up (after Yves falls asleep at his desk), I initially wrote it so that Yves wakes Vincent from a nightmare.

But (as direct a link to vulnerability as that might have been,) Vincent would not talk about his nightmare 😭 So I switched gears.

I also specifically wanted to write about Vincent's experience being cared for growing up. I think something that's culturally resonant with me (as an Asian American, and the eldest daughter to immigrant parents) is like, the ways families can and cannot say I love you—the quiet things that are done in place of a more direct expression of it. The way that while unspoken consideration can speak volumes, it can just as easily be invisible. But even now, writing this post, I feel like it's difficult for me to untangle the feelings and experiences I've had into something that feels sufficiently multifaceted.

Vincent has a different childhood from I do (it is probably worth noting that I do not project onto any of my characters, nor do I use them as a vessel to get my own experiences across). I think I'm just drawn to writing tricky/non-straightforward expressions of love, in general :) Sometimes that is the kind of love that resonates with me most.

[fyeahnix]

I've been slacking on HFW updates here so here are my tweets over the last couple of days compounded in sequential order:

Another of my favorite things about Horizon, which I probably mentioned when I played ZD, is how Aloy uses technology to enhance her own skills. It's so easy to let tech do all the heavy lifting for us, but she never does that. Even without the Focus, she's still a competent and crafty hunter. And that's fucking cool. Also I just really like Aloy in general. Such a great character.

I like to think Talanah is still overall a better hunter than Aloy and would be absolutely OP with a Focus. She had to get nerfed some type of way. This is based on absolutely nothing but vibes because I cannot remember every single event from the first game nor did I read the comic. Sorry lol

Forbidden West has done a fantastic job so far of adding in a bunch of cool new shit to play around with on top of what you got in the last game, including the expansion of the climbing mechanic. I can't even imagine how they'll top this if there's a third game coming at some point in the future. No, I am nowhere near done with this. I've only just started, haven't even GOTTEN to the actual Forbidden West yet. It was just a point I wanted to make. THIS is how I feel a sequel should be done.

The only thing truly frustrating me about HFW right now is the vantage points. I love the concept in theory, but in practice....ugh. idk if I'm having issues with spatial awareness or what..but getting feedback that's like "maybe I'm too high? Maybe I'm too low. Maybe I'm not close enough?" Kinda sucks because I FEEL like I'm close but the game is so super specific about specific angles. I got to the correct spot like 10 times but because I wasn't looking at the exact angle, it wasn't completing. It's a skill issue on my part probably but it is still very frustrating.

Now that I'm really looking at the map, No Man's Land feels like "Starter Area #2" lmfao

Monster Hunter solidified for me that I love the feeling of saying "OOOO SHIT" when I see another large monster. Saw the first Snapmaw and just had that same feeling lol. Horizon series is literally Monster Hunter Jr for me and I mean that with all the love and praise in the world. Ofc I am going to be shocked when I see A Very Large Monster lurking around in the water when I wasn't expecting it.

Aloy is doing The Protagonist Thing and I love it. Really showcasing her flaws in this game.

I appreciate the fact that Aloy is like "I can't fucking cook, taking this shit to an actual chef" when she picks up ingredients. We love honesty.

Goddamn the tattoo work on these characters in Forbidden West is so GOOD

It is very cool to see Aloy's vocabulary around Old World tech evolve between the two games. She has clearly learned quite a lot.

The way Aloy says hi to a certain character is so reminiscent of how she said hi to the first hologram she saw on the Focus. How cute lol.

Very very interesting how different tribes describe Aloy's hair color. Like it's such a SMALL detail but really shows the level of attention they put into making the tribes culturally significant from each other.

There is just so much to talk about with this game.... But the food you can buy...so much juicy lore and worldbuilding in the descriptions. I LIVE for shit like this

[frankiebirds]

rambling about mosley lane under the cut SORRY this got lon and maybe a little incoherent i am sick. TLDR: i liked it a lot and mgg is a really good director

mosley lane was so good?? i know it sounds weird to be shocked given its reputation but holy shit it lived up to it.

to be honest, i had expected some of the hype to be bias because mgg directed. not that i had any doubts that he was talented—a cast member directing episodes of the tv show they feature in is nowhere near unheard of, and doesn't always mean they're a good director as well as an actor, but i do feel like directing twelve episodes of that show implies genuine talent. also, while cast members directing is pretty normal, most of them don't have degrees in directing. mgg had one before he even started on cm, only studied acting in HS because they didn't offer filmmaking, and iirc has outright said directing is his actual passion.

and yeah, mgg is definitely a really good director. i might just be biased like i thought other people could be, but i honestly think that may have been one of the best directed episodes of cm. (i see 3x10 getting a lot of praise in that regard, which i'm sure it deserves if i look just at the directing, but i...don't like that episode, sorry). i don't really know how to describe the rest of cm's directing, because...i mean it's not bad. but imo it's very safe samey. there were a lot of moments in 5x16 where i noticed the directing and thought it was very good. maybe i was paying more attention because i knew people talked a lot about mgg directing, but i have noticed the directing and editing of cm before. just usually not multiple times per episode.

also—this one i can't (fully) give to mgg, because it's partially the writing, partially beth grant's performance, partially mgg's direction of that performance, and other factors from various people that contribute, but i'm really happy this episode had an unsympathetic female unsub. i get frustrated sometimes with the apparent notion (not in cm so much, i think cm is actually quite good with this) that women are always Good and Pure and therefor only do bad things for sympathetic and understandable reasons. (obviously there's some nuance. i was writing about the nuance but it got nerdy and off-topic)

ANYWAY. i really liked it :) if mgg directed a horror film i would watch it.

(p.s. "he was alive yesterday?" hit like a train despite the fact that i knew it was coming. simon mirren and erica messer can i Talk To You.)

[musette22]

I just spent the whole evening reading what I thought was a stucky fic (from the tags), but it ended up with Bucky with someone else, and a heartbroken Steve. It was an old fic, and the author had recieved a lot of comments from other readers who felt decieved, but they were dismissed with the argument that fic readers are spoiled with tags and should learn that a story like real life can be unpredictable. The author had originally set out to write stucky but changed their mind half way so the end pairing came out of nowhere and didn’t really make sense with the build up. I didn’t comment, but I’m sitting here asking myself if I’m wrong to be angry. Obviously writers invest a lot more time writing a fic than I do reading it, but it still was my whole evening wasted on the opposite of what I wanted. What was supposed to make me feel good made me feel like shit, and I obviously really wanted to avoid that. I have always trusted tags, but from now on I might have to skip to the end before reading to make sure. Am I entitled?

Oh darling, I am so sorry that happened to you 😔 That is so sad and disheartening, especially if you were looking for something that would make you feel good. I 100% percent understand that it made you feel frustrated and even a little angry, and no, I don't think you're entitled in this case. I do believe that tagging is a courtesy and not a duty, and I also believe everyone is allowed to write and post whatever they want, regardless of what other people may or may not want to read.

Having said that, though, I personally think that making sure that a story is appropriately tagged, at least for major triggers and pairings, is the decent thing to do. The author of this fic could have easily updated the tags to have them reflect the plot twist for any future readers, and in doing that, they could have prevented a lot of people being left disheartened or sad at the end of it. However much I want people to read my stories, I personally would not want someone to read my fic and be triggered or saddened by something it contained. In that case, I'd much rather they just skipped it and read something else.

The idea of almost intentionally disappointing my readers is so counterintuitive to me, because a huge reason why I personally read fic is to feel better, so that's what I hope to offer other people with my own fic too, you know? Of course, I know lots of people love angst and even unhappy endings, because they're cathartic or just because they make them feel things, and that's perfectly fine, too. But in that case, reading those kinds is fics is a choice - and if a fic isn't properly tagged or if it professes to be something that it's not, then a potential reader is not able to make an informed decision, and I think that's misleading and quite disrespectful of the audience. It's not a crime, but it's not very nice, is what I'm trying to say.

This author's argument about how readers should learn that stories, like life, can be unpredictable is mind-boggling to me as well, because hello, surely it can't be news to them that reading (especially fanfiction) serves as a much needed escape from real life for lots and lots of people. I'm sure there are some who read books with the purpose of being surprised or caught off guard, but I think they're a minority tbh. And again, that should be a choice. Long story short: I don't think you're wrong to be frustrated in this case, and while I'm glad to hear you didn't comment and rant at the author like some people would, if I were you, I would personally steer clear of them and their work in the future. Sending you hugs, lovely, and I hope you find something new to read that gives you everything you're looking for soon! ❤️

[burr-ell]

@meiloorun-notthefruit replied to your post “yeah, hot take, if you haven't watched the first...”:

Wait if anybody wants to respond to this i have never watched c1 and i am having the time of my life with this week's episode, what is an example of the group actually mad? im curious

​Sorry it took me a minute to respond to this! There's a pretty good writeup of the issue on r/HobbyDrama (though it does have one or two minor errors), but I'll give you the short(er) answer.

So originally, Vox Machina actually had eight members: Percy, Grog, Scanlan, Pike, Vax, Vex, Keyleth, and Tiberius Stormwind, a dragonborn sorcerer played by Orion Acaba, another voice actor who'd done work on video games and anime with the rest of the cast. For a variety of reasons, Orion rather quickly developed a nasty case of Main Character Syndrome, and frequently did things that genuinely angered the cast. A couple notable examples:

When the party fought and defeated K'Varn, a beholder, in 1x11, Orion had Tiberius exit the fight for a plan to rally a group of mindflayers to their cause (which failed), and eventually returned, landed the final killing blow on K'Varn, and generally acted like an ass about it, leading to Marisha demanding to know why he was being so rude and unpleasant.

In Vasselheim in 1x16, in order to escape from a trap, Vex had to fire a nearly-impossible shot and rolled a 35, meaning it was guaranteed to happen and was going to be an incredible moment for her, and Orion had Tiberius insert himself to "help" using Telekinesis. The entire cast yelled at him indiscriminately for it, and while Matt was able to thread the needle live on stream, the atmosphere was generally very tense.

The nadir of them all, 1x27. This one's a twofer:

I don't know if you've watched TLOVM, but the Briarwood arc had just begun at this point, and all the party really knew about the Briarwoods was that at least one of them was a vampire. (I can't remember if they knew Delilah was a human necromancer by this point.) So Tiberius goes on a HUGE shopping trip to buy—among other things—every mirror he can in Emon, and the conclusion most people have drawn, quite reasonably, is that he intended to use them to make a massive light array to just drench Whitestone in sunlight and fry all the vampires. He also tries to write his family in his hometown of Draconia to bring the Draconian army into Whitestone to take care of things for them. Both of those things are frustrating to watch in the moment, but especially so when you realize that they're attempts to essentially speedrun Percy's entire arc and make Tiberius the hero. This and the other things he was doing already took up a ton of solo time, and Travis (known hater of shopping) eventually snapped "how about you get nothing else, and we move on?"

Then, the grandaddy of them all: while the party was discussing what to do and Vex was formulating a plan, Orion announced out of bumfuck nowhere that "Tiberius is getting a half-chub". Every single person at the table was appalled, and you can feel the change in the air if you watch the scene. Travis and Taliesin are both visibly furious; Sam, Marisha, Liam, and Matt are completely taken aback; and Laura looks incredibly uncomfortable. Tiberius had never established this aspect of his character at all the way Scanlan did, and after everything else there was very little patience anyone was going to grant him.

These are just isolated moments; Orion had overall behaved rather unpleasantly on-air and did a lot of metagaming (the reason he left the K'Varn fight was that he knew what beholders were and thought Matt was out to get him), and Matt once explicitly said after Orion left that he used to cheat on his dice rolls. Going from episode 27 to 28 is such a palpable shift in tone and atmosphere, and it's unsurprising that two episodes later they would announce Orion's permanent departure.

So yeah—if you've watched those scenes, you have a much better metric for what the cast's genuine anger is actually like.

[bluelolblue]

I will fucking explode, I'm mad at myself

I apologize in advance for my frustrations again, I am halfway through my contraception and this happens every time when I'm halfway through it, it's the hormones that fuck me up a lot, like you're on a period but you're not. It's really frustrating and I hate when this happens, it's hard to control the emotions and everything.

My dumbass just CAN'T make priorities, can't make a schedule, can't write, can't finish something that's been going on for months, overall just can't do some things and I'm just so mad at myself that I don't even know what to do.

I should maybe take a break but the problem is I can't. I don't know how to relax. I really just want to write and finish this already, but it's like it's going nowhere. Like, what's the point? It sucks. Maybe it doesn't suck but I'm just not happy with it. I am happy with it and not at the same time and it doesn't make sense. See, I'm just so complicated for no damn reason.

I want to make everyone happy, I really do, I want to be better, I'm trying but my main problem is I'm just not happy with myself. And that's no one else's fault but my own.

I really hate when I feel like this, bc I'm so mad at myself, and then I feel like crying, and then I just feel so lost.

I mean, I won't stop writing... it's just that at the very moment I'm just lost and don't know what to do. I put so much pressure on myself for no reason, really, but it feels so easy to hate myself for being like this. It's so easy, and only I can hurt myself like this.

I think I decided that I'll focus on ONE thing, I realized I'm struggling a lot when I'm working on more than one fic. I just can't multi task with that, as much as I want to because I have so many ideas, I think I can't because I'm pressuring myself like that. And that's not the point of writing.

Anyways, okay this was like going through five stages of grief. It's the mood swings, they're so fucked up I'm so sorry

[yourlocalstranger123]

I've seen people running out of ideas so I'm here! :D

You can adjust some things

Also note: I am very into a sub character...sorry if you didn't like it, you can adjust it though!

Warning: smut, and as you can see, I pick favorites....sorry (as favorites I meant fandom, not characters since I cannot decide and it's worser since I like hot women and hot men. Well...i like men more although i still think womens are seriously hot)

Advance apologies; sorry if the ideas are actually similar to others. Since there is a lot and there's probably some out there that's similar

Genshin;

(Fluff angst) a bit of yandere Zhongli. Zhongli as in his younger ages, you being an unknown outlander (or maybe a God from another world 🤯) companying him. He enjoys your company until one day when his beloved friends, etc. Dies, you disappear. He cried and cried. He's different from the Zhongli we know....he's calm, collected, etc. but the only difference is that he's cold. No emotion until he felt your presence once again, he looked around wondering where you were. He saw you....he broke down in tears as you cup his head with your hands, soothing him. He accidentally went to his human dragon form. You didn't mind, you pat his head and kissed his forehead. He wagged his tail like a dog, as you try to let go his grip tightens and his tail wraps around you. He finally felt your warmth once again. He's not gonna let go now.

Smut; dottore (Dom reader) he is also at his young age, he found you. Although he thought you were gonna annoy him, your presence felt....nice. of course he's never gonna admit that just yet—....... later when he becomes a harbinger, he felt uncomfortable though 'what is this feeling?' He began being desperate for you, you were nowhere to be found. That made him go even more mad, he didn't even bother about his experiments! Until you sighed up to be an assistant for everyone that needs help, that even angered him more, you were supposed to be his! He began to hog you more but the other noticed and they took a liking to you they love you and became jealous that you give him more attention to them! ( this could be a whole series or something )

Sagau; shy reader! (Reader is also smart as heck-) You get isekai to genshin, you seem to be summoned since there was a summoning sign, etc. They felt so happy! They found out you were shy, they didn't mind. They thought it was cute! Some are definitely gonna tease you. You were also really smart, you helped tignari with his plants telling him what's wrong with it because the plant wouldn't grow. You told albedo/dottore the mistakes they made, you also made them really strong when you weren't isekai to genshin and they are very happy with it. This one time, you were so serious and hot when they saw you pin down someone that was sneak attacking you/them. Although they were suprised...maybe even turned on— I mean *cough* *cough* who wouldn't? the person being pinned is very flustered of how hot you are. Your people perhaps are jealous and want to be pinned down by you like that.

Diluc; being quite very shy around you and poor little you thought he didn't like you :( you began being frustrated so you pin him against the wall and asked him why is he avoiding you with a sad frown. Although...you felt something poking you (the rest for you to do 🥲)

Obey me;

(Oblivious dom reader) Lucifer is becoming impatient with you. You haven't even made a single move! You guys been dating for half a year by now! He sure he sent obvious signs like bending down infront of you to get his pen that he 'accidentally' dropped. His pride is about to break down because he thinks he isn't attractive enough to turn you on! When you went into the shared bed, he broke down on his knees. Begging you. Just what are you gonna do?

All; everyone was there. Even the angels and lucifer enemy! But anyways they found out you were a royal and everyone was oh so curious. The moment you were summoned you were still wearing a robe (inspired by my summoning gone wrong)

Of course these two are my main post since I haven't yet post any other stuff either has anyone asked me to post something else. Of course your welcomed to when my request are open :D