#soo many more bugs it makes me want to scream and cry

[noviceunicorn]

I do like to think that I have become big bold strong person when it comes to efficiently dealing with bugs, and I do think younger me would be absolutely in awe if we ever met. Unfortunately, I am not immune to bad stim bad stim when a bug Enters My Vicinity in an unexpected way.

[tendousthoughts]

Hewo! I saw that your requests are open and I really love your “hq boys calling their s/o clingy” series and I was wondering if you could do one with Akaashi, Tendou and Kenma? You don’t have to if you don’t want to! Bye and I hope you have a great day!

HQ Boys Calling Their S/O Clingy Pt. 4

Character(s) Included: Akaashi, Tendō, & Kenma

Warning(s): Foul Language (Cursing), Tendō grabbed your wrist hard.

A/N: Okay, so here goes pt 4! I’m sorry it took so long! I have a bunch of projects to do this week so I’m trying to finish them. To the author of this request, I’m so glad you enjoyed my series! Also, don’t worry about it, I’m glad to do it! Reblogs, follows, and likes are greatly appreciated! If you wanna rp please contact me! This might be the last part but the next series will be out soon! [hq boys thinking you left them after an argument!] If you have any requests please read my rules first! For my final notes, please if you just wanna chat and stuff my anon is on, character anons would be fun just to talk to, or emoji anons so you can stay hidden but I know that it is the same person lmao!

Song of the day: We Are The Crystal Gems - Steven Universe [btw I cried twice this week and both times this song made me stop soo perfect song to listen to!]

Where to find all the parts

Where to find all my content

Credit: @/teesumu

Akaashi

He was doing his work when you came up to him. He was tired and you could tell so you tried your best not to annoy him, but you saw him less and less so you felt lonely. Needing comfort you went to him.

“Baby.. are you almost rea-” he cuts you off before you can finish.

“Y/n not right now please..” He mumbled typing.

“Sorry I just wanted to know when we will be heading out for the date..?” You mumble.

“Can’t do today sorry,” he continued to type away.

“But you bailed for the last two week.. and you promised,” you whine softly.

“Stop acting like a child, please I need to finish my work. I can’t do today and I couldn’t do the last two weeks, get over it.” He hummed as he pressed enter crossing something off of this list of things.

“Can we cuddle for a bit then..?” You whispers

“Y/n are you just trying to be the most fucking clingy person in the world?” He finally looks up. “I don’t need you to go all childish with me right now, okay?” He started to raise his voice. “Your not that fucking important to be honest. You do nothing, you’re always at home whining or clinging or bothering me! I have to make the fucking money because your ‘job’ isn’t paying much.” He turned away.

You walk out closing the door crying softly. You call up Bokuto and his partner wondering if they want to hang out.

When you get to the restaurant they are there and you change how many people sitting down you guys laugh and just hang out in general. You’re extremely happy and they can see it, everyone can. Maybe it is because the relationship your in doesn’t really feel like a relationship..

“Okay well talk to you later..” you smile as you head to your car.

When you got home it was late. You rush in worried you’ll wake him so you head to the spare room. About twenty minutes later.

Knock

Knock

Knock

“Y..y/n?” He sniffles.

You pretend to be asleep as he walks in tears are flowing downs his cheeks as he takes in a deep breath of relief. He sits on the bed and just holds you for a minute. “Thank god your back... I’m sorry.. I know you’re asleep but I’m sorry.. I fucked up and you are not clingy and I missed you and I shouldn’t have said that. I was annoyed and I shouldn’t have taken it out on you.. I’m sorry.. I’m so sorry,” he whispered. He lays down next to you sniffing softly.

“Keiji... it is okay don’t worry,” you mumble softly like you might have just woke up. You wrap your arms around him tightly combing through his hair comforting him. “It will be okay I got you.. you can sleep now I got you..”

“Y..y/n I thought you left for good I’m sorry I shouldn’t have done that I am sorry I am sorry...” he continues to whisper clutching onto your clothes, “I yelled at you for no reason and when I went to say sorry you were gone and..”

You kiss his cheek, “relax baby it will be okay..”

Tendō

When you walked in, Tendō was already making jokes about you. You were just there to surprise him but, maybe you were being way too sensitive or maybe he was being oddly mean. Then he said it.. the one fucking thing your extremely insecure about, “ no seriously,” he laughed a bit before continuing, “she never fucking let’s go of me. She is amazingly clingy, like lice when you have them there are only two ways to get them out. Pull them out which takes hours, or just shave your head.” He laughed with his team.

Your eyes filled with tears.. you muttered under your breath, “I’m sorry..” before leaving. He didn’t know you were there and quite frankly you didn’t wanna be there anymore.

When he got home you were already packing. “Hey baby..?” He called out. No response. Walking over he saw tears in your eyes while you packed more of your stuff. “Where are you going, my paradise?”

You laugh to yourself, trying to fill the scar that he left. You were more then just fucking lice you were his fucking partner. “I think..” you mumble not strong enough to say if you get up. “My stuff will be out by tomorrow. I just need to call a few people and pack a few more things before I leave. If you don’t mind.. I’ll stay on the couch you won’t have to worry.” You mumble before getting up.

“Wait what?” He follows you as you go to the next room. “Why are you leaving?” You start to pack more. He grabbed your wrist. Hard. Then freezes when he sees the pure fear in your eyes. “Fuck. I’m sorry” he lets you go, you look away now crying again. “Y/n.. I’m sorry please look at me.”

You look over, “mhm..?” Your voice is shaky, you have your legs and arms closer to you then usual. You seem.. uncomfortable.. scared like you are too worried about something.

“Hey baby..” he slowly looked down at the box. “Can you tell me what you’re doing?” He bit his lip.

“Moving.” You answer before leaving.

The night was cold without you by his side. He tried to think about what he might have done or why you were hurt but every time he tried to think about it.. he felt terrible.

When the morning can you were already packing, he had tears in his eyes as he walked over.. “please don’t leave me.. I’m sorry.. please,” he whispered looking at your back.

You snap.. “your sorry? You don’t even fucking remember yesterday do you! Seriously, how much do you say shit about me, that you can’t remember laughing to your colleagues about how much I cling to you? YOU RELATED ME TO FUCKING LICE! HOW FUCKING DARE YOU NOW COME BACK AND SAY HOW MUCH YOU WANT ME TO STAY.” You took a deep breath wiping your tears.

“What..?” He looked shocked.

“Oh now you want to play dumb?” You wiped your tears, “I’m smarter than you think..”

“I’m so sorry.. please let’s just talk..?” He whispered

“Talk? Talk?! You wanna talk now?” You looked at him, “isn’t that what we are doing? But soon I’m leaving so I guess we got to wrap this up.”

“I was stupid. I am stupid. I am an ass. I wanted to be part of their stupid group, and I thought that would get me in. They were all talking about how annoying their partners and I thought that I could be part of something. But you heard and fucked everything up. I am stupid and dumb and I hurt you and I shouldn’t have. Now I’m the idiot crying for you back when I fucked up. I could’ve just shut up I could of just stay in my own area but I fuck it up. I always fuck it up. You’re not clingy and I feel disgusted that I referred to you as lice, not to mention call you that. It shouldn’t have happened and I’m sorry..” He was crying hard.

“W..we can talk about this I think... just for now let’s lay down..” you held him carrying his to your room. He looked like a mess. You held him tight.

“Y/n... I love you..” he mumbled holding on tight, hopeful that you might say it back.

“I love you too, Tendō..” you whisper, kissing his head.

Kenma

“Hey baby it is getting late be you should get ready for bed..” you smile walking in noticing he is on a livestream.

“Can you stop bugging me?” Kenma mumbled a bit. “FUCK ON MY LEFT! MY LEFT!” He screamed. He hit his head. Turning towards you, annoyed.

“I’m sorry..” you mumble.

“No, no it is always okay when you come into my room when I’m doing something! I mean really it is okay to not listen and fuck up so much,” he said sarcastically.

“I didn’t mean too.. I just thought you should sleep..” he mumbled.

You leave the room crying making your way to the guest bedroom.

An hour or two later he had come out of his gaming room tired and ready to snuggle with you. “Babe..?” He looked around.

You were asleep in the other room so when he came in he was relieved to find you there. He tapped your shoulder softly, “babe..?” He mumbled.

You moved over letting him in. Falling asleep with his arms around you.

In the morning you wake up first to make breakfast for yourself and when he comes out he sees you cleaning clearly you had just finished a meal. “Morning..” he mumbled. No reply.

You walk past him with no reply, and you do that all day. Ignoring him and not responding. Finally he had enough. “Y/n.. please stop ignoring me..”

You ignore him then you hear soft sniffles. Turning around you see him crying. “What? Can we talk later?”

“But I wanna hang out please..” he mumbled.

“Can you do something useful and just stop being stop fucking clingy?” You reply, words hurting like knives.

Finally he realizes, “I’m sorry.. I was playing and my teammate wasn’t doing anything and then you came in, and I took it out on you when I shouldn’t have.” He looked up. “You are the best thing that has happened to me and I shouldn’t treat you like that..” he sniffs.

“Come here..” you open up the blanket him gliding in. You hold him softly rubbing his back. “You can’t do that to me.. I was just trying to help and it isn’t fair to me.. so please don’t, okay..? You weren’t on mute and everyone heard you yelling at me, and that is just embarrassing for me. To be ridiculed in front of everyone. I felt like you didn’t want me, okay? So please don’t do that, and I’m sorry for not checking before coming in. I should’ve not bugged you when you were playing.”

“Okay.. I’m sorry and I won’t ever do that again.. I love you..” he mumbled softly.

“I love you to babe..” you rub his back slowly he stops crying and falls asleep, and you follow after.

Follows and likes are appreciated! Please reblog if you enjoyed it so more people can find my work! Thank you all for your support! Stay safe, and have a good rest of your day!

[nastasyafilippovnas]

FDTD

Thanks for asking! <3

from dusk till dawn

Top 5 favourite characters: kisa, richie, monica, ximena, venganza Other characters you like: seth, vanessa, scott, uncle eddie, paloma Least favourite characters: kate (i swear this name is cursed lol) Otps: richie x kisa, of courseeee Notps: richiek-te, sethk-te (sorry not sorry) Favourite friendships: seth and kisa, ximena with richie and seth. i guess both of these are more frenemies than friendships, but yeah, lol Favourite family: richie, seth and uncle eddie! Favourite episodes: 2.01 Opening Night, 2.08 The Last Temptation of Richard Gecko,  1.07 Pandemonium (though really everything from 1.07 to 1.10 is so good), 3.02 La Reina Favourite season/book/movie: season two Favourite quotes: i have it tattooed, so, "sometimes eternity isn't forever" Best musical moment: 1.07 during Kisa's pole dancing scene Moment that made you fangirl/boy the hardest: when Richie and Kisa saw each other again on 3.02 (I think I was screaming through this whole episode) When it really disappointed you: season three. most of it doesn't even feel like the same show, but especially that flash forward (i did not need that image in my head) Saddest moment: oh, my, i can't even?? this show has so many sad moments, but maybe Kisa's flashbacks in 2.04 Most well done character death: uncle eddie's, for the emotional impact, i guess. Favourite guest star: there are so many good ones, but Jeff Fahey, because i absolutely love uncle Eddie and he was on justified too Favourite cast member: Eiza, duh. No one loved the show as much as her. Character you wish was still alive: XIMENA. That was some bullshit death for man pain and I hated. One thing you hope really happens: well, the show is over, soo...nothing to wish for. Most shocking twist: maybe Carlos coming back in s03? how many times can a guy die and come back? When did you start watching/reading?: 2016, I think? it was before s03 aired but after s02. Best animal/creature: kisa's snakes, i guess. Favourite location: the titty twister Trope you wish they would stop using: killing latina women (i was fine with it during s01/02, but in s03 it just became so obvious and without any reason, ugh) One thing this show/book/film does better than others: really delving into mexican/latin america culture, i loved how it's a supernatural show that doesn't make the folklore european, and it works so well. Funniest moments: "richard, we should be sleeping. like that guy in that movie you made me watch" lol and when freddie wants to get something from the bar and seth says it's free but richie says it's two fifty or something? lol i love my man. Couple you would like to see: i'd like to see my couple get back together, ha.  Actor/Actress you want to join the cast: --- Favourite outfit: Kisa's bike outfit from 2.10 Favourite item: the diamond bracelet brb crying Do you own anything related to this show/book/film?: nothing except my tattoo What house/team/group/friendship group/family/race etc would you be in?: culebras, of course. Most boring plotline: amaru/kate in s03 Most laughably bad moment: hm, idk, the monsters in s03 Best flashback/flashfoward if any: Kisa's during s02. Most layered character: KISA. Most one dimensional character: i don't really think there's one? even the ones i hate are  actually layered. Scariest moment: idk, the show is full of gore, but not very scary. Grossest moment: when richie, venganza and the lords just go for it in 3.01 Best looking male: Richie. Best looking female: Kisa. I'm shallow, it's why I ship them. Who you’re crushing on (if any): Kisa, Richie, Ximena, Monica, lol. Favourite cast moment: Zane showing up in one of Eiza's IG videos. (that's like, my proof they didn't hate each other). Favourite transportation: Seth's car at the end of 1.10 Most beautiful scene (scenery/shot wise): i think this show has so many beautiful shots! it's impossible to choose just one. Unanswered question/continuity issue/plot error that bugs you: how did seth, richie and kate end up together in the flash forward? why is richie able to walk in daylight without any problem? WHAT IS THAT FLASH FORWARD? my nightmare, i guess. Best promo: hmm, i don't remember any special one. At what point did you fall in love with this show/book: probably during Kisa's dance scene in 1.07.

in depth fandom questions

[hunghohoseok]

Punk Rock Drummer

Disclaimer: He is actually NOT a drummer it just didn’t work out that way lol

Words: 3.8k

Genre: Smut.Fluff (if you squint)

Warnings: seeeeeex.dick piercing.tonguing panties? (is that a thing?).implied drinking.unsafe sex (stay safe my creepies).accidental voyerism

Pairing: Min Yoongi x Reader

Summary: You’ve always wanted to go to the big city, but going alone terrifies you. Your best friend tells you that her brother and his band are gonna have their big break and is inviting you to go see him in action. The thing is, you’re a sucker for a boy with tattoos.

This is part of my B.F.B MASTERLIST! Find the rest here!

Blog Masterlist

(this shit in unedited, sorry ya’ll)

You knew, you knew, you shouldn’t have messed with him. Everyone told you that he’d hurt you, but you had a type.

Asshole, asshole is your type.

Jay was his name, breaking your heart was his game. He was hot, had a lip ring, and his hair was unruly and it made your heart flutter and your insides feel a certain way. Oh, and he had a tribal tattoo wrapped around his forearm. That was the only thing you could took at while he took you in the back of his car. It was dark enough that he didn’t notice.  

After that, he seemed to call you less, and you tried to call until you called one too many times and his phone was out of service.  

“He had ONE tattoo and you fell for him?” Your best friend Yejoon handed you another tissue and sniffed into softly.

“Maybe.”

“Why do you do this to yourself?” She asked softly.

The thought of your best friend worrying about you made you cry harder and she wrapped you into her arms and leaned you both back on the couch and you ended up falling asleep on her chest.  

After this one, you’re done, you say to yourself.

“Soo, guess what?” Yejoon leaned on the table in front of you and you looked up from your homework.

“Yes ma’am?”

“Yoongi is having a show.”

“Okay? He always has shows.” You turned your eyes back to your book, determined to read this chapter.  

“Buuuut,” she grabbed the book and closed it. Before you could complain, she put her finger on your lips, “It’s at the Bangtan Ballroom. Tonight.”

Your eyes widened. The Bangtan Ballroom holds around 500 people, and it’s in the heart of the city, where you love to go – not alone though. Yejoon doesn’t like big crowds and a fast-paced environment, so she would always refuse. You both have heard too many bad things about the city, and she took them to heart. They scared you too, lowkey, but you couldn’t help but want to go.

“You’re kidding!” You grabbed Yejoons arms and jumped around the coffee table. “Oh my God, I’m so proud of him!”

Yejoon smiled widely at you, “Me too! And guess what?” She pulled to lanyards out of her back pocket and waved them in your face.

You screamed and started jumping up again, Yejoon joining in until a hard knock from under your apartment floor made you stop in your tracks. You both giggle and she pushes you from your guys living room to her bedroom and she made a b-line for the closet.

“Gotta look good for the other bands. I could meet my true love tonight.” She pulls out a short red dress, puts it up to her chest. “Or a quickie. Same thing right?” She threw the dress back in the closet and dug once more. “Though, I don’t think Yoongi would like it.”

“How is your brother by the way?”

“Bugging me every second, ‘When are you coming to see us? You got any friends who need jobs? Know anyone single?’ I swear, if he asks me one more thing, I'll shut down a cell tower.”

“He’s single? What happened to Suzy? I thought they were ‘in loooove’.” You made a heart around your face and Yejoon threw and shirt at you.

“That ship sailed after they moved to the city for Yoongi’s band. She ‘couldn’t handle the pressure of having a famous boyfriend.’”

“Hardly, they had just formed! They were inseparable during high school.”

Yejoon finally picks out a pair of pants and takes off the ones she currently wearing. “Yeah, well I told him she was bitch from the start.”

You grinned and made your way to her closet and tried to dig out the dress she pulled out earlier.  

“Hot.” You open your mouth to reply and you see her twisted in front of the mirror. She had put on the shirt she threw at you; it was cropped and off one shoulder and you couldn’t see..

“Are you not wearing a bra?”

“Of course not, it wouldn’t be easy otherwise.”

“You really out here tryin’ to be a hoe, huh?” You snickered.

“You’re just mad that my tits are small enough to be a hoe.”

“Oh, fuck off.”  

She laughed at you as you went to your room to get ready.

“I put on the worst bra.” You were grabbing your side, trying to shove the metal piece back into it. The dress was tighter than you thought and it wasn’t helping.

“Dont’cha wish?” Yejoon gestured to herself, and she ended up wearing tight black pants and a cropped tank top.  

“Oh shut up,” You mumbled. You guys had finally made it to the ballroom and it was packed to the brim with bodies, already drunk and dancing to the music playing through the speakers. As you guys finally made your way to the back, you flashed you VIP lanyards and they let you guys though.  

“He said it was the door at the end of the hall..” Yejoon murmured to herself as people, you assume other bands pass by and she couldn’t help but stare. Taking her arm, you made your way to the last room and knocked on it and a gruff voice welcomed you.  

“Come on in!”

Yejoon pushed her way past you and you heard a gruff voice say, “Speak of the Devil.”

“And she shall appear. You were talking about me?” She leaned on Namjoon, the drummer, while he was sitting on the couch. He may have been clumsy off stage, but on stage was a different persona, grabbing the crowd's attention. With the slow beats of his base drum the crowd would hush and be at his mercy. As of now, he was at Yejoon’s attention. He sat up straighter and grinned and she tilted her head in feigned ignorance.  

“Ya, get off him.”  

A low gruff came from behind you that made you jump and turn around. Yoongi had looked different since you’ve seen hm. Granted that was 3 years ago at your high school graduation. Instead of short, spiked, black hair, it now made its way a little past his eyes and bleached His eyes were sunken in and closed halfway into a glare directed at his sister almost falling into his drummer's lap. He stood straighter now, you quickly noticed. He was at least a head taller than you and his once smooth face now had piercings; many adoring his ears, one on his eyebrow, and two small hoops on either side of his bottom lip. Out of your peripherals, you notice he’s wearing a turtleneck. Not very comfortable, you think, he’ll be sweating and that’s not a turtleneck.  

A soft black ink adorned his neck and down towards the collar of his shirt which you now see is a shirt with an unfamiliar logo on it. You don’t think much of it because your eyes go lower and see that he is covered in tattoo’s all the way down to his fingers. As the hands wave in front of you, you soon realize that he was trying to get your attention.  

“Hello? Earth to Y/N?”  

“What?”

“I asked you if you wanted to sit. You seem out of it.” He gestures to a loveseat and you sit down softly. Everyone else had broken off into their respective conversations and you feel out of place now. Yoongi plops down next to you and he leans back and put his arms on the back of the sofa.

“So, how’ve been? You look good.”

“Oh! Uh, thanks, thank you.” Your hands try to drag down the fabric of your dress, and after a few tries you give up and set your hands in your lap. “You look good too. These past few years have been good to you.”

He laughed, “I could say the same about you.” His tongue peaked out and swiped across his lip and you breath hitched.  

“Um, s-so do you like the city?”  

The blond makes a face and he shrugs a bit, “It loses its touch after a while. Too fuckin’ loud honestly.”  

“Really? Ah, I’d love it.”

“Why?”

“I once drove with my parents through the arts district as a child. It was so beautiful, the lights so pretty, and people were talking and having fun and I just want that experience, ya know?”

You looked at him and he had a small grin on his face.  

“What?”

“Nothing. Why don’t you just go?”

You hummed and leaned back on the couch. “It’s all so new. And I've heard some rough stories about the city so I don’t wanna go alone. Yejoon doesn’t like coming so.”

“She doesn’t like anything fun,” he laughed. You smiled at him and became more apparent to his arm that was on the back of seat was inching its way towards you. It’s hard to ignore the heat of his arm on you and involuntarily shiver.

He moved his body closer and whispered so only you could hear, “Well, if you want, I can take you.”  

Taking in a sharp breath, and glanced at his neck piece. You have never seen Yoongi like this. He was never a childhood crush of yours and you sure as hell wasn’t one of his.  

Well-

There was one time, in high school. Yoongi and Suzy had come down to visit and you had been spending the weekend with Yejoon and her family. In the middle of the night you had to use the bathroom which happened to be past the guest room, so no, you were not peeping and you want to make that clear. Hearing a soft groan, you stopped, half asleep, in front of the door and peeked into the light shining though the crack of the door.  

The image permanently seeped into your brain was one of Yoongi, thrusting wildly into Suzy from behind. With her head covered by a pillow, all you could see was Yoongi. How sweaty he was, how he would roll his hips before thrusts, and his abdomen – you had no idea that he worked out. Suzy’s moans were quiet but you could tell she was trying so hard to keep them that way.  

You didn’t realize how long you had been standing there until Yoongi’s eyes bolted up and you swore he made eye contact with you because he grabbed his lip in between his teeth and thrusted faster into and when you heard Suzy get louder, you finally came to your senses and scurried off to the bathroom.  

You couldn’t make eye contact with either of them the whole weekend. Yoongi never mentioned it, so you felt less like less of a pervert. Your own little secret.  

All that is coming back to you as he gazes softly at you. Glancing over to Yejoon, she’s too engrossed in a conversation with Seokjin, the singer and another one of Yoongi’s friends, to pay attention.  

You felt soft fingers on your chin, “Over here, Dollface.”

“Uh, I don’t, uh,” He grinned at your stuttering, and set his hand on your uncovered thigh.

“Tell me if I'm being too forward but,” he got even closer and whispered in your ear, “you look delectable in that dress.”

You felt a shiver down your spine, this one obvious to him, and he chuckled.

“All right guys, you’re on.”  

And just like that, he was gone, along with the rest of the band. You finally had a chance to take a breath and Yejoon took your hand to lead you backstage to watch.  

The only thing you could pay attention to though is Yoongi. The way his fingers lazily strummed the cords of his base guitar all while looking sexy. The crowd recognizes this as well, due to them chanting for him to take his shirt off.

He indulges.

The intricate linework on his chest and back makes you drool, and you hope no one saw that.

After the show, you, Yejoon, Yoongi and the rest of the guys went to a late-night sushi bar, the perks of the city.

There was laughter, drinking, yelling, and you had completely forgotten about Yoongi’s proposition earlier. But as you guys were leaving, Yejoon having been drunk, you were worried about how you guys would get home. She was in no condition to drive, and you had a few drinks and weren’t going to risk it.  

That is how you ended up in Yoongi’s car sitting in the passenger's seat while Yejoon softly sings to herself in the back.  

“Y/N, Y/N,” Yejoon leaned forward to your headrest, “d’ ‘u feel as good as I do righ’ now?”

“No, not really,” you laughed at her and she gazed at you, or at least you think it was at you. It could’ve well been the door handle she was looking at. Her eyes were glazed over and you she abruptly blew a strawberry at you and melted back into her seat.  

You guys had finally made it back to your apartment without a hitch and you and Yoongi (mostly Yoongi) lugged the singing drunk girl back into your guys home, and safely in her bed.  

Yoongi waited in the living room while you helped Yejoon out of her clothes all while she tries to grab your face and tell you how much you love her.

When you finally make it out, Yoongi is on the couch scrolling on his phone. You don’t know how he makes something so mundane look so alluring.  

“Thanks. I appreciate it. She’s a handful sometimes.”

“Oh no problem,” he stands and makes his way to you.  

“So,” you don’t make eye contact with the blond while you talk. “It was an amazing show.”  

“Thanks. Was I, uh,” Hearing him stutter made you gape at him. He was gazing softly at you and scratched his neck. “Was I out of line, back there in the green room?”

You wanted to say no immediately, but you had to think about it. Did you let him because you wanted him to, or because the ink on his arms? Yoongi was nice and from what you heard from Suzy, a grumpy but soft human being willing to make you happy in the most subtle ways. As you think back, you remember in middle school he’d give you his lunch because your family couldn’t afford it. Your first day of freshman year he stuck to you and Yejoon all day, making sure you got to your right classes safely. When he left for college the summer after, he let you and Yejoon hang out in the basement with him and his band every practice – something he claimed he hated.

You felt your chest warm up and you reached out to him. “I liked it.”

“Oh,” his face was flushed and you couldn’t tell it was from the alcohol, “cool, cool.”

He interlocked your fingers and neither of you moved for a minute. You glanced back up at him and you guys slowly made your way towards one another until your lips touched softly. That was all it took for Yoongi’s hand to leave yours and find its way to the back of your head and deepen the kiss. His other hand was on your back and yours interlocked behind his neck.

As the kiss got more intense, his tongue ran across your mouth and you stuck yours out to taste him. His mouth wrapped around the muscle and sucked on it and you couldn’t help but moan.  

He released your tongue, “Yoongi, please.”  

“Yeah?” He bent down and grabbed the back of your thighs and you jumped into his arms. Yoongi walked to the couch and settled between your legs. “Tell me what you need, Dollface.”

Your legs had to stretch apart to accommodate for his body and your dress began to roll up. You tried to pull it down, but Yoongi grabbed your wrists and put them above your head.

“Tell me.” His voice was gruff.

“I-I need you, Yoongi.”

“To do what?”

You groaned, “Touch me.”

“How Dollface? You have to be specific.”  

You groaned again and lifted your hips. You felt his growing bulge against your panties, which were now free for him to see. He took both of your writs in one hand and dragged his other hand slowly down your body to your heat and rubbed a finger over your panties and a moan makes your way out of your throat.  

“Oh? This is what you want?”  

“Yes, please.”

“Oh, well, I do aim to please Dollface.” He let go of you and moved his face toward your center. His tongue prodded at you and you hissed. Yoongi thrusted his tongue in you as far as he can, making your panties go with him and he made his way to your clit, soaking your panties as you squirm under his touch.  

“More pleeeeaaase Yoongi.”

You could hear a soft chuckle and before you knew it, his tongue was directly against your pussy, thrusting in and out while his thumb was rubbing against your clit in quick circles. Your moans got louder and you realized that no matter how drunk she is, Yejoon hear and that makes you cover you bite on you hand.  

“Let me hear you baby.”

“But - haa – she's gonna he-aah!”

Yoongi took your clit into his mouth and flicked it around with his tongue and your felt a growing heat in the pit of your stomach.

“Faster please.”

Your toes began to curl and you tried to spread your legs as far as they could go and he release your clit, spreading your lips to see how pink and wet you are.  

“Let go Dollface, cum on my tongue, please.”

Hearing his plead made you moan behind your hand and seized your clit again. He moaned into you and the rubber band snapped in the pit of your stomach and your legs shook and you hand left your mouth and onto Yoongi’s head, gabbing and pushing him closer as you ride out your orgasm.  

He finally pulls away and kisses you hard, shoving his tongue in your mouth so you can taste yourself. You feel his hands come to the neck line of your dress, trying to pull it down to look at your breasts. When it wouldn’t budge, he groaned a “sorry” into your mouth and before you could ask, you heard a loud rip.  

“Yoongi! This was Yejoon’s.”

“I’ll buy her a new one,” he sat up and made a mental picture of how wrecked you look. Chest red, a pretty black lace bra pushing your breasts together, the bottom of the dress rolled up to your waist, and your pussy on show or him. “Take it off.”

You sit up all while keeping eye contact with Yoongi. His lip was in between his teeth and starts to take off his shirt and you couldn’t help but drag your hands across his inked chest.

“You like these?” He smirked.

“Mhm.”

“I like these,” Yoongi squeezed your breast and leaned you both back down to latch his mouth on your nipple while his hand rubbed the other. “God, they’re so pretty. You’re so beautiful Dollface.”

You could feel yourself blush at the compliment, not that you could tell. “Please, I need you Yoongi.”

Your hands started unbuttoning his jeans and he grabbed your wrists again. He started rubbing himself against your center.

“I saw you, you know.”

“W-what?”

“All those years ago, when I was home.”

“Oh God Yoongi, I-”

“You liked it, huh? Liked how good I was fucking her? How she couldn’t keep quiet while I took her over and over?”

You whimpered and moved your hips with Yoongi, “Please.”

“I knew you were there, I just couldn’t help but show off. It made it so hot knowing someone, you, were watching me.”

He reached into his pants and pulled out his hard cock and he stroked himself a few times. You looked at his red tip and you saw a silver ball at the top. Oh God, his dick is pierced, oh god, oh god-

“You want me Dollface?”

You nodded fast and he rubbed he tip against your clit. You felt your hole clench around nothing.

“I do,” You took hold of his forearms to keep your grounded while his middle finger entered you slowly.

“Oh, so easily,” he pumped a few times before adding another one, it going in easier than the last. “Jesus, okay. You want my cock this bad Dollface?”

“Just do it!” The plea in your voice made Yoongi smile this big gummy smile and you felt the heat in your stomach again. He lined his cock up to your entrance and the pressure of his cock stretching you made you clench.

“Ah, fuck,” He sighed as his hips met yours.

“C’mon, fuck me.”

“You asked for it Dollface.”

He dragged out his cock and thrusts back in and didn’t stop until you had a pace you both agreed with. Your moans were like a lullaby to his ears and he wanted the extended version. He groaned at the pleasure he was giving you and rolled his hips to hit your g-sot. Your moans got louder and high pitched and the sound of his skin slapping your made you push back harder.  

“Oh fuck, fuck, fuck.” You reached out to Yoongi and you caught a glimpse of one of his tattoos. It was a rose wrapped in thorns. So simple and bright red, but you loved it. It seemed soft and the thorns made it seem too dangerous to touch. Looking back at him, his lidded eyes were staring you down and you couldn’t help but keep eye contact with his as he fucked you.

“Please, make me cum.”

“Oh I will,” he gruffed.

His fingers found your clit and he rubbed as fast as he was thrusting and you squeezed around him feeling your orgasm coming.  

“Oh, fuck I’m close.”

“Fuck yes, cum for me Dollface. I need it. Squeeze my cock, squeeze it.”

With his words, he made you came around him, tightening your muscle and your mouth was formed an ‘o’ in a silent scream.  

A groan hit your ears and Yoongi’s thrusts were stuttering off tempo and he pulled himself out, pumped once, twice, and the third stroke set him coming across your stomach.

“Ah shit.”  

Only the sounds of your harsh breathing was heard and he fell softly on top of you and wrapped his arms around your limp body.  

“So,” he finally said after a few minutes, jolting you awake, “still want the tour of the city? I think it could make a great date.”

You smiled at him and he leaned down and gave you a kiss.  

“I think I'd like that.”

[madewithbangtan]

Bts gif reaction to you taking a bullet for them and almost dying.

Request: Would it be okay to ask for each member’s reaction to you literally taking a bullet for them and you almost die? Sorry for the angsty request.

(Credits to gif owners)

Before I start, why was this under fluff in my old masterlist... 

Rapmon: Namjoon and you have been dating for almost 2 years and it’s only been 2 months since you’ve gone public, many fans loved you two because of the affection and the love that he had for you. But as much as fans loved you some hated you and Rm, some saying he betrayed army and he shouldn’t be a part of Bts because he is just a burden to them, and Namjoon being sweet he didn’t really mind all the death threats that came towards him, surprising nearly little to None came your way, this surprised you but you just brushed it off. It was at a fan meeting, he was happily meeting fans when he saw you from a distance, fans went crazy loving your every bit, you stood beside Rm and fans wanted to take pictures with you, when bts stood up to make greetings towards the fans, you felt a strange feeling, someone was staring at you. Many fans wore hoodies so that wasn’t the surprising part, it was the way he or she moved and acted. Whoever they were they started walking towards you and the rest of the boys. It seemed like you were the only one that noticed, you brushed it off until they kept getting closer and the feeling in your guts got worse, one minute there at the back the next they’re basically one row away from the front, still no one really noticed, you didn’t want to ruin the lively mood or anything, so you kept quiet just looking over towards them every once in a while. Just when you looked at them around the 14th times they took a gun out, seemed like still, no one noticed but you. This time you also noticed where it was aimed at, your boyfriend, your love, you didn’t know what to do, so you just jumped in front of him, you felt nothing, maybe it was a toy gun, that was until you looked down and saw blood, everywhere all over your dress, all over the promise necklace that Namjoon got you, you fell, into Namjoon’s arms, crying because now the pain was unbearable, he looked at you with wide eyes, almost scared that anything he does will just hurt you more, the happy cheers now turning into terrified screams, the security guards taking the man that shot the gun. The next thing you see was Namjoons worried eyes filled with tears, it sounded like he almost breathed out his heart, he dropped his head beside you. Rm: “Oh thank god, you're okay, you're fine, you’ll be okay, your okay now” Y/N: “Namjoon… yeah I’m okay, calm down” Rm: “I thought I almost lost you, I thought that I almost lost you for good” Months later you found out that the man that almost killed you was a fan of yours and hated the fact that Namjoon took you away from him. Hmmm, fans are actually crazy.

Jin: You and Jin have been dating for about 6 months and it’s been 2 months since you’ve gone public, everything seemed so perfect nearly none of the fans hated either of you, they all loved both your dorky personalities. So when at a concert backstage a staff member that you did not recognise came and decided to talk to you it didn’t really make you feel weird, you just thought it was another polite and nice big hit employee that loved all of Bts and you, but you did take note of the weird things that he was doing, the weird ways that he would fidget when Jin kissed your cheeks or when you went to massage Jin’s shoulders because of how anxious he was for the concert. This didn’t really bug you, you brushed it off as maybe he’s anxious for Bts too, or maybe he was really desperate for the toilet. But when he looked way too angry to be a staff member and started walking towards Bts while they were getting ready to go on stage, you automatically ended up walking towards them too, subconsciously looking back every time, and holding onto Jin's hands. Now you felt the strange feeling in your guts, the weird knot that would not go away.

Not wanting Jin to worry before a big stage, you just walked beside him and told him good luck, you stayed put by the wall that separated the stage and the back, something inside you told you to stay there, you felt horrible, like something horrible was going to happen, you thought that until you saw it. He was taking out a gun, at this moment, all you could think about was where it was aimed at, Jin, pointing right at jin, while he was at the back of the group, getting into position. You didn’t think twice about jumping in front of the bullet, it didn’t take any longer for you to black out, while you were cold on the floor, guards tackled the man down, Jin turned his head, so did the rest of Bts and many of the fans were trying to get a peak, Jin went pale, he went numb he saw your lifeless body on the floor, faced down. Jin: “Y/N?!” He ran towards you and held you on his lap. You woke up after a 10-hour long surgery to repair your damaged organs and your continued failing heart. When you opened your eyes, Jin rested his head on your arms and held your hands tightly, he must’ve stayed awake all night waiting for you to wake up, he looked so pretty sleeping like this. you decided to let him sleep a little longer while looking at his sleeping posture. When you saw him crying and sweating is when you decided to wake him up. Y/N: “Hey, Jin? Baby wake up.” Jin: “OH MY LORD, YOUR AWAKE, I’ve been so worried you have no idea, I’m sorry, I'm so..” You stopped him by placing a hand on top of his. Jin: “I’m soo sorry..” Y/N: “You didn’t do anything” After months of recovery, you found out that he was deathly obsessed with you, and he had plans of killing Jin and kidnapping you and keeping you to himself.

Suga: You and Yoongi had been dating for 5 years and you had only been public for about a week, fans went crazy, it was 50/50 some loved you guys some hated you guys, but for the most part, you felt like they were fine with the two of you dating. That was until that day, you were on a date with Yoongi at the cafe, the cafe that the two of you met 5 years ago, you talked and talked and talked for about 2 hours, for 2 hours you noticed a girl weirdly looking over to your table constantly, you thought that maybe, Just maybe she just recognised Yoongi and was a huge fan of him, but you still decided to keep an eye, she kept catching the corner of your eyes. Suga: “Hey baby, I’m gonna go use the bathroom, wait here okay?” Y/N: “Yeah, hurry back I’ll miss you” He smiled and walked to the toilets when he walked to the toilets, the girl on the other table got up, and walked towards the toilet, something telling you to follow her, she went into one of the female stalls, and you heard something like a gun being loaded. You didn’t want to jump to conclusions so you walked out of your stall and washed your hands, being really cautious of the girl that walked out behind you, she left the bathroom without a second glance at you, funnily enough she was right outside the guys bathroom, with a loaded gun it was in sight everyone could see it if they walked out the bathroom, you panicked, and started texting Suga but he wasn’t answering. You kept peering outside of the women’s bathroom, you slowly started to walk out and made sure to walk out slowly, just then you heard Suga bumping into someone and saying sorry and walking out, you were inches away from the girl, and Suga was walking straight out, she held her gun out and aimed to shoot. You ran as fast as humanly possible, towards him, jumping Into Yoongi, luckily it was far enough to not penetrate through you and stay inside your body, but the bad thing was the bullet was still in you, you fell into his arms, crying and the bodyguards that were waiting outside of the cafe came inside and tackled her and they helped you into an ambulance, as soon as you got into the hospital, your blood pressure was dropping way too fast and you passed out. After hours of surgery trying to get the bullet out of your body before it travelled to the important organs and possibly harmed you more than it already had. You woke up, moving your hands. Suga: “Hey, Y/N you're awake? Thank god, I thought you died, you have no idea how much that scared me” You couldn’t speak, it hurt, you just groaned and cried out. Suga: “Baby it’s okay, don’t try to talk it’s fine, stay still, I’m just glad your awake and okay” After a few hours detectives came to question you, you told them, all that you knew, and they told you that she was, in fact, a Yoongi ‘fan’ and she was crazy, she didn’t like the fact that you were dating him, so instead of being happy for you and moving on with her life, she decided murder was a good option.

J-hope: J-hope was such a sweet pumpkin, that when You started dating, he decided to go public instantly because he loved you, and he wanted to show the world how beautiful you were on the inside and out, and he wanted to show off his girlfriend to everyone. And the world either loved the two of you or frankly didn’t really care. You knew that he was usually very busy, so when he wasn’t, you decided to go shopping, he loved it and so did you. When you were shopping in one of the department stores that you’ve been to about a million times, you met some armys that wanted to get their albums signed by Hoseok, while you were waiting for him, you decided to look around, you went up to the necklaces and saw a women maybe in her mid 30’s standing there staring intensely at you. You looked up and met eyes with her, you felt weird so you smiled and looked away, still trying to be polite, Just then Hoseok came up to you and kissed the back of your head and whispered. Hobi: “Thanks for waiting for me without complaining” Y/N: “Now why would I complain, if I was a fan I would love to get my albums signed by you” Hobi: “You are my fan, and you do have albums signed by me” Y/N: “You know what I mean, you pumpkin” You smiled and started looking at the clothes on the other side of the store together, just when you forgot about the women she was staring at you again. This time staring at you and Hoseok’s hand linked together, she looked extremely out of it, and she looked like she was on drugs or something. You only grew more uncomfortable looking at her, so you decided to look away and just mind your own business, your boyfriend turned around and looked at the shoes on the other side while you kept looking at the clothes, keeping an eye on her. Just when you thought she was leaving, she took out a gun and aimed it towards Hoseok, you didn’t really have time to react, only that you had to move an inch towards the left to block it. You blacked out, the only thing you can do is hear, and you heard people screaming and someone screaming your name. Many hours later your surgery, you opened your eyes to a very very very worried Hoseok. Hobi: “OMG OMG OMG, your awake, thank god, your awake” You slightly smiled at him. After hours of being awake, you found out that the bullet barely missed your heart, in fact, it slid past your heart, so you needed more surgery to fix that, but for now, you were, alive and fine.

Jimin: Jimin loves you, with everything he has, all his heart, and he loved to show you how much he loved you. So naturally even before going public, fans caught on, and fans actually loved you both, most armys loved you, and you were slowly growing your own fandom. 

Jimin had a day off, so you guys decided to start a live stream on your Instagram together, you were streaming for about 4 hours until you became increasingly hungry, so you decided to travel with the live stream still running, you guys went to a small restaurant that you always went to, the owners knew you and they were fine with you live streaming in there, soon fans found where you and Jimin were and Jimin decided for your and his safety to call his personal bodyguards to just wait outside and keep any fans that weren’t going to eat outside. 

So it wasn’t suspicious when a group of men walked in and started to order a bunch of food, you and Jimin sat there all lovey-dovey, and held hands together while feeding each other and live streaming the food, you took turns feeding each other and the fans went crazy in the comments loving the affections that went on between you two. About another 20 minutes passed and you look around and see the group of men looking right at you and your boyfriend, you brushed it off as maybe their looking at you because your filming yourselves and that’s not that normal. But you kept seeing from the corner of your eyes this one man who kept staring, your boyfriend was having such a fun time, that he didn’t realise, you didn’t want to ruin the mood and the atmosphere so you just looked past it. That was until he seemed to be taking something out, and his friends now have stopped moving altogether and they were staring too. You saw a gun from the corner of your eyes, not wanting anyone to worry, you kept smiling, until you saw him take aim, it didn’t look like it was aimed at you, but at your boyfriend, you instantly became stone-faced and looked at your boyfriend, trying to get him cover but it was too late, the gun was already shot and the only way to save him, was for you to get shot instead. You crossed in front of the bullet just before it hit him, it penetrated into your rib cage and you were on top of Jimin lifeless. Jimin instantly went from smiling and having the best time, to being scared shitless. Honestly, it would be a lie if Jimin remembered the events that followed, all he knew was you were shot, and he didn’t know what to do. You woke up hours later, luckily the bullet didn’t travel too far and it fractured your ribs and that was it, all you needed was to rest up a bit and take caution, the police came to interview you and see what happened, you told him everything that you could remember, and Jimin told him everything that he could remember, he excused himself out of the room, and when he returned you could see that he was crying. Y/N: “Baby, why are you crying?” Jimin: “I wasn’t able to protect you, I’m the one that’s meant to protect you and I couldn’t” Y/N: “Stop, what the hell Jimin, stop blaming yourself, I can’t see you break down like that” Jimin: “I’m sorry” Y/N: “Look at me, I want a hug, a nice long hug, can you do that?” He smiled and climbed under the covers and hugged you.

Taehyung: You and V dated for about a year before going public, he loved you and you loved him, Taehyung loved his hometown and wanted you to visit it with him, say hello to his parents and also go on vacation, you were both extremely stressed from your work and he wanted you to relax, you were on the train because let’s be honest driving down to Daegu would take forever and so taking the train was the next best option, Taehyung’s manager still came with the two of you because Taehyung was worried that you would get lost. So when you arrived in Daegu, you guys went to greet his parents and then you checked into the hotel and went to the dinner that was being held specifically for VIP guests. You were sitting and eating noodles and pizza, a weird combination but you guys were always so dorky that it didn’t surprise you that he picked pizza and you picked noodles, while you were eating, Taehyung pointed out the window and to the stars that were in the sky, it looked so beautiful that you couldn’t take your eyes off them, you couldn’t until you saw a weird man standing outside and staring at you and Tae, mostly Taehyung, but Tae didn’t see it, he didn’t really care because he was so used to people staring and looking at him. 

But your guts told you otherwise, you looked out the window again and this time the man moved inside the hall, and he sat down at a table, he didn’t order anything which rang alarm bells in your head. Y/N: “Hey Tae let's go back to our room, I’m tired” Tae: “Really? You don’t want to eat more, that’s surprising are you ill or something?” Y/N: “No I’m just really tired” You didn’t want to tell him the man was creeping you out. As you two got up so did he, and he took something out of his black coat, and pointed it at Tae, it took you a few seconds to realise what it was, before Taehyung could see what it was you were on the ground, looking lifeless, you were hiccuping to get blood out of your throat and try to talk. Tae: “No don’t do it, don’t talk, stay still, you’ll be fine, I’m here, I’ve got you” Y/N: “I’m.. really… cold Tae….I’m… really….. tired” Tae: “No no no, don’t, don’t say anything just keep your eyes on me” You couldn’t anymore, Taehyung was now crying his eyes out, not caring what happens to the man that shot you, your eyes shut and he was practically screaming for someone to help. You woke up a whole day later, you felt really heavy and in so much pain. Tae: “Hey, you're awake, you’re safe now, don’t worry” It was Tae but his voice sounded deeper and raspier than usual. Y/N: “Tae? Where am I?” Tae: “You're okay, you're at the hospital, stay still don’t try to move too much, it’ll hurt.” Y/N: “Okay... I’m sorry if I made you worry” You fell back asleep and once you had enough energy to fully wake up, you found out that the man was following you and Tae from Seoul and he was planning on shooting Tae when you guys were leaving your hotel room, his reasoning was that he should’ve been in Tae’s place and you should be in love with him and not V. (Jealousy can be poisonous)

Jungkook: You and Jungkook had been dating for 3 years and it was 2 years since you went public, everyone loved the both of you, you hardly saw any hate comments, in fact, every comment would either say, please come on here more with Y/N or can you go on a show with Y/N, we miss her, and many love from many army’s. So Jungkook wanting to show you off some more, he would contact somewhere like we got married or anywhere that could feature Just the two of you. Wgm decided to feature the two of you on a special episode. The special thing was that it was going on live and nothing was going to be edited before being released, which could be the reason for what happened after. You guys were heading towards an amusement park for a fun day, you line up with Jungkook to go on the Koreas tallest ride, as always it was packed and you forgot to get the VIP tickets to skip the line, instead you waited in the line With cameras all around the two of you, and you were looking around while Jungkook decided to tie your hair up for you, you were smiling to yourself because of how sweet he was, until you saw a man, looking very out of place, slightly spazzing out, he was about 6 people behind you and kookie. Kookie: “I’m done, this line is so long” as much as he loved rides he wasn’t the most patient cookie in the jar. Y/N: “Oppa be patient, well get there soon, and then we can get a VIP ticket so we can skip these lines.” Kookie: “Ugh fine I’m only being patient because you’re here” You waited another 10 mins you were almost at the front, but it was just your luck that the ride was already full right in front of you and Jungkook, it seemed like you were hearing things, you turned around to see what that metal rattling together was, when you turned around you saw a pistol in the mans hand, you were internally freaking out, but you didn’t want to freak out if the gun wasn’t real, that issue was solved really fast when you saw him put in bullets into the pistol, he loaded the gun up and aimed it straight past you and towards Jungkook. Jungkook even getting a paper cut killed you and hurt you, so seeing a gun being aimed at him made you freak out more than if the gun was aimed at you, before you could even say anything he pressed the trigger and the gun shot out, your body automatically stood in front of Jungkook, the bullet felt like nothing for 2 seconds until you were in so much pain that you couldn’t even breath.

You were breathing heavy and Jungkook looked about ready to beat the man half to death, that was until you used your last strength to grab his hands and pull him into you, you blacked out, Jungkook being super worried thought you died. 

(Let’s be real if I made you die then he would probably kill the guy and me…JKJK don’t eat me) You woke up hours later, to Jungkook that was still crying, with the rest of Bts who looked extremely worried too. Kookie: “Oh my god, you're awake, you're awake, your awake and alive, I'm gonna murder that guy” You grabbed his arms again Y/N: “Babe can you stay here with me, I’m scared, I don’t want you to go” Kookie: “Okay, I won’t go anywhere, I’ll be right here” You found out later that the man had escaped the mental asylum, he was mentally ill and tried to kill anyone that got in his way, of getting to you and ‘loving you’.

Hope you enjoyed.

[bts-is-my-life-as-always]

Bts gif reaction to you taking a bullet for them and almost dying.

Request:Would it be okay to ask for each member's reaction to you literally taking a bullet for them and you almost die? Sorry for the angsty request. Behind the reaction: you are publicly dating one of the bts members. Credits to gif owners Here’s another request for anon who asked this, hope you like it. Rapmon: Namjoon and you have been dating for almost 2 years and it’s only been 2 months since you’ve gone public, many fans loved you two because of the affection and the love that he had for you. But as much as fans loved you some hated you and rapmon, some saying he betrayed army and he shouldn’t be a part of bts because he is putting a burden on them, and Namjoon being sweet he didn’t really mind all the death threats that came towards him, surprising nearly little to None came your way, this surprised you but you just brushed it off. It was at a fan meeting, he was happily meeting fans when he saw you from a distance, fans went crazy loving your every bit, you stood beside rapmon and fans wanted to take pictures with you, when bts stood up to make greetings towards the fans, you saw a strange, way too covered up man or women you couldn’t tell, but they were walking towards bts, it seemed like you were the only one that noticed, you brushed it off until they kept getting closer, one minute there at the back the next there basically one row away from the front, still no one really noticed, you didn’t want to ruin the lively mood or anything, so you kept quiet just looking at him or her. Just when you looked at them about 14 times they took a gun out, seemed like still no one noticed but you noticed this time you also noticed where it was aimed at, your boyfriend, your love, you didn’t know what to do, so you just jumped in front of him, you felt nothing, maybe it was a toy gun, that was until you looked down and saw blood, everywhere all over your dress, all over the promise necklace that Namjoon got you, you fell, into rapmonsters arms, crying because now the pain was unbearable, he looked at you with wide eyes, almost scared that anything he does will just hurt you more, the happy cheers now turning into terrified screams, the security guards taking the man that shot the gun. The next thing you see was namjoons worried eyes, it sounded like he almost breathed out his heart, he dropped his head beside you. “Oh thank god, your okay, your fine, you’ll be okay, your now okay” “Namjoon... yeah I’m okay, calm down” “I thought I almost lost you, I thought that I almost lost you for good” Months later you found out that the man that almost killed you was a fan of yours and hated the fact that rapmon took you away from him. Hmmm fans are actually crazy.

Jin: You and him have been dating for about 6 months and it’s been 2 months since you’ve gone public, everything seemed so perfect nearly none of the fans hated either of you, they all loved both your dorky personalities. So when at a concert backstage a staff member that you did not recognise came and decided to talk to you it didn’t really make you feel any way, you just thought it was another polite and nice big hit employee that loved all of bts and you, but you did take note of the weird things that he was doing, the weird ways that he would fidget when jin kissed your cheeks or when, you went to massage jin’s shoulders because of how anxious he was for the concert, this didn’t really bug you, you brushed it off as maybe he’s anxious for bts too, or maybe he was really desperate for the toilet. But when he looked way too angry to be a staff member, and started walking towards bts while they were getting ready to go on stage, you automatically ended up walking towards them too, subconsciously looking back every time, and holding onto jins hands. Not wanting him to worry before a big stage, you just walked beside him and told him good luck, you stayed put by the wall that separated the stage and the back, something inside you told you to stay there, you felt horrible, like something horrible was going to happen, you thought that until you saw it, he was taking out a gun, at this moment, all you could think about was where it was aimed at, Jin, pointing right at jin, while he was at the back of the group, getting into position. You didn’t think twice about jumping in front of the bullet, it didn’t take any longer for you to black out, while you were cold on the floor, guards tackled the man down, Jin turned his head, so did the rest of bts and many of the fans, Jin went pale, he went numb he saw your lifeless body on the floor, faced down. “Y/N” He ran towards you, held you on his lap You woke up after a 10 hour long surgery to repair your damaged organs and your continued failing heart. When you opened your eyes, Jin rested his head on your arms and holding your hand so tight that you had to wake him up, so you wouldn’t loose all circulation to your hands. “Hey, Jin? Baby wake up.” “OH MY LORD, YOUR AWAKE, I’ve been so worried you have no idea, I’m sorry, im so..” You stopped him by placing a hand on top of his. “I’m soo sorry..” “You didn’t do anything” After months of recovery you found out that he was deathly obsessed with you, and he had plans of killing jin and kidnapping you and keeping you to himself.

Suga: You and suga had been dating for 5 years and you had only been public for about a week, fans went crazy, it was 50/50 some loved you guys some hated you guys, but for the most part, you felt like they were fine with the two of you dating. That was until that day, you were on a date with suga at the cafe, the cafe that the two of you met 5 years ago, you talked and talked and talked for about 2 hours, since 2 hours you noticed a girl weirdly looking over to your table constantly, you thought that maybe, Just maybe she just recognised suga and was a huge fan of him, but you still decided to keep an eye, she kept catching the corner of your eyes. “Hey baby, I’m gonna go use the bathroom, wait here okay?” “Yeah, hurry back I’ll miss you” As he smiled and walked to the toilets, when he walked to the toilets, the girl on the other table got up, and walked towards the toilet, something telling you to follow her, she went into one of the female stalls, and you heard something like a gun being loaded, you didn’t want to jump to conclusions so you walked out of your stall and washed your hands, being really cautious of the girl that walked out behind you, she left the bathroom without a second glance at you, funnily enough she was right outside the guys bathroom, with a loaded gun it was in sight everyone could see it if they walked out the bathroom, you panicked, and started texting suga but he wasn’t answering, so you kept peering outside of the women’s bathroom, you slowly started to walk out and made sure to walk out slowly, just then you heard suga bumping into someone and saying sorry and walking out, you were inches away from the girl, and suga was walking straight out, she held her gun out and aimed to shoot, you ran as fast as humanly possible, towards him, jumping onto suga, luckily it was far enough to not penetrate through you and stay inside your body, but the bad thing was the bullet was still in you, you fell into his arms, crying and the body guards that were waiting outside of the cafe came inside and tackled her and they helped you into an ambulance, as soon as you got into the hospital, your blood pressure was dropping way too fast and you passed out. After hours of surgery trying to get the bullet out of your body before it travelled to the important organs and possibly harm you more than it already had. You woke up, moving your hands. “Hey, Y/N your awake? Thank god, I thought you died, you have no idea how much that scared me” You couldn’t speak, it hurt, you just groaned and cried out. “Baby it’s okay, don’t try to talk it’s fine, stay still, I’m just glade your awake and okay” After a few hours detectives came to question you, you told them all that you knew, and they told you that she was in fact suga ‘fan’ and she was the type of fan that says ‘if I can’t have you, then no one can’

J-hope: J-hope was such a sweet pumpkin, that when You started dating, he decided to go public instantly because he loved you, and he wanted to show the world how beautiful you were on the inside and out, and he wanted to show off his girlfriend to everyone. And the world either loved the two of you, or frankly didn’t really care. You knew that he was usually very busy, so when he wasn’t, you decided to usually go shopping, he loved it and so did you. When you were shopping in one of the department stores that you’ve been to about a million times, you met some armys that wanted to get their albums signed by hoseok, while you were waiting for him, you decided to look around, you went up to the necklaces and saw a women maybe in her mid 30’s standing there staring intensely at you, you looked up and met eyes with her, you felt weird so you smiled and looked away, still trying to be polite, Just then hoseok came up to you and kissed the back of your head and whispered. “Thanks for waiting for me without complaining” “Now why would I complain, if I was a fan I would love to get my albums signed by you” “You are my fan, and you do have albums signed by me” “You know what I mean, you pumpkin” You smiled and starting looking at the clothes on he other side of the store, just when you forgot about the women she was staring at you again, this time staring at you and hoseoks hand linked together, she looked extremely out of it, and she looked like she was on some type of medication, but you only grew more uncomfortable looking at her, so you decided to look away and just mind your own business, your boyfriend turned around and looked at the shoes o the other side while you kept looking at the clothes, keeping an eye on her. Just when you thought she was leaving, she took out a gun and aimed it towards hoseok, you didn’t really have time to react, only that you had to move an inch towards the left to block it. You blacked out, the only thing you can do is hear, and you heard people screaming and someone screaming your name. Many hours later your surgery, you opened your eyes to a very very very worried hoseok. “OMG OMG OMG, your awake, thank god, your awake” You slightly smiled at him. After hours of being awake, you found out that the bullet barely missed your heart, in fact it slid past your heart, so you needed more surgery to fix that, but for now you were, alive and fine.

Jimin: Jimin loves you, with everything he has, all his heart, and he loved to show you it, so even before going public, fans caught on, and fans actually loved you both, most armys loved you, and you were slowly growing your own fandom, jimin had a day off, so you guys decided to start a live stream on your Instagram together, you were streaming for about 4 hours until you became increasingly hungry, so you decided to travel with the live stream still running, you guys went to a small restaurant that you always went to, the owners knew you and they were fine with you live streaming in there, soon fans found where you and jimin were and jimin decided for your and his safety to call his personal body guards to just wait outside and keep any fans that weren’t going to eat outside. So it wasn’t suspicious when a group of men walked in and started to order a bunch of food, you and jimin sat there all lovey dovey, and held hands together while feeding each other and live streaming the food, you took turns feeding each other and the fans went crazy in the comments loving the quirkiness. About another 20 minuet passes and you look around and see the group of men looking right at you and your boyfriend, you brushed it off as maybe their looking at you because your filming yourselves and that’s not that normal. But you kept seeing from the corner of your eyes this one man who kept staring, your boyfriend was having such a fun time, that he didn’t realise, you didn’t want to ruin the mood and the atmosphere so you just looked past it. That was until he seemed to be taking something out, and his friends now have stopped moving all together and they were staring too. You saw a gun from the corner of your eyes, not wanting anyone to worry, you kept smiling, until you saw him take aim, it didn’t look like it was aimed at you, but at your boyfriend, you instantly became stone faced and looked at your boyfriend, trying to get him cover but it was too late, the gun was already shot and the only way to save him, was for you to get shot instead. You crossed in front of the bullet just before it hit him, it penetrated into your rib cage and you were on top of jimin lifeless. Jimin instantly went from smiling and having the best time, to being scared shitless. Honestly it would be a lie if jimin remembered the events that followed, all he knew was you were shot, and he didn’t know what to do. You woke up hours later, luckily the bullet didn’t travel too far and it fractured your ribs and that was it, all you needed was to rest up a bit and take caution, the police came to interview you and see what happened, you told him everything that you could remember, and jimin told him everything that he could remember, he excused himself out of the room, and when he returned you could see that he was crying. “Baby, why are you crying?” “I wasn’t able to protect you, I’m the one that’s meant to protect you and I couldn’t” “Stop, what the hell jimin, stop blaming yourself, I can’t see you break down like that” “I’m sorry” “Look at me, I want a hug, a nice long hug, can you do that?” He smiled and climbed under the covers and hugged you.

Taehyung: You and v dated for about a year before going public, he loved you and you loved him, taehyung loved his hometown and wanted you to visit it with him, say hello to his parents and also go on vacation, you were both extremely stressed from your work and he wanted you to relax, you were on the train because let’s be honest driving down to daegu would take forever and so taking the train was the next best option, taehyungs manager still came with the two of you because taehyung was worried that you would get lost. So when you arrived in daegu, you guys went to greet his parents and then you checked into the hotel and went to the dinner that was being held specially for vip guests and so you guys were sitting and eating noodles and pizza, a weird combination but you guys were always so dorky that it didn’t surprise you that he picked pizza and you picked noodles, while you were eating, taehyung pointed out the window and to the stars that were in the sky, it looked so beautiful that you couldn’t take your eyes off, you couldn’t until you saw a weird man standing outside and staring at you and v, mostly taehyung, but v didn’t see it, he didn’t really care because he was so used to people staring and looking at him. But your guts told you otherwise, you looked out the window again and this time the man moved inside the hall, and he sat down at a table, he didn’t order anything which rang alarm bells in your head. “Hey tae lets go back to our room, I’m tired” “Really? You don’t want to eat more, that’s surprising are you ill or something?” “No I’m just really tired” You didn’t want to tell him the man was creeping you out. As you two got up so did he, and he took something out of his black coat, and pointed it at tae, it took you a few seconds to realise what it was, before taehyung could see what it was you were on the ground, looking lifeless, you were hiccuping to get blood out of your throat and try to talk. “No don’t do it, don’t talk, stay still, you’ll be fine” “I’m.. really... cold tae....im... really..... tired” “No no no, don’t, don’t say anything just keep your eyes on me” You couldn’t anymore, taehyung was now crying his eyes out, not caring what happens to the man that shot you, your eyes shut and he was practically screaming for someone to help. You woke up a whole day later, you felt really heavy and in so much pain. “Hey, your okay” It was tae but his voice sounded deeper and more raspier than usual. “Tae? Where am I?” “Your okay, your at the hospital, stay still don’t try to move too much, it’ll hurt.” “Thank you tae, thanks” You fell back asleep and once you had enough energy to fully wake up, you found out that the man was following you and tae from Seoul and he was planning on shooting tae when you guys were leaving your apartments, his reasoning was that, he should’ve been in tae’s place and not tae that you should be in love with the man and not v. (Jealousy can be poisonous)

Jungkook: You and jungkook had been dating for 3 years and it was 2 years since you went public, everyone loved the both of you, you hardly saw any hate comments, in fact every comment would either say, please come on here more with Y/N or can you go on a show with Y/N, we miss her, and many love from many army’s. So jungkook wanting to show you off some more, he would contact somewhere like we got married or anywhere that could feature Just the two of you. Wgm decided to feature the two of you on a special episode, of Just the two of you, the special thing was that it was going on live and nothing was going to be edited before being released, which could be the reason for what happened after. You guys were heading towards an amusement park for a fun day, you line up with jungkook to go on the Koreas tallest ride, as always it was packed and you forgot to get the vip tickets to skip the line, instead you waited in the line With cameras all around the two of you, and you were looking around while jungkook decided to tie your hair up for you, you were smiling to yourself because of how sweet he was, until you saw a man, looking very out of place, slightly spazzing out, he was about 6 people behind you and kookie. “I’m done, this line is so long” “Oppa be patient, well get there soon, and then we can get a vip ticket so we can skip these lines.” “Ugh fine I’m only being patient because you’re here” You waited another 10 mins you were almost at the front, but it was just your luck that the ride was already full right in front of you and jungkook, it seemed like you were hearing things, you turned around to see what that metal rattling together was, when you turned around you saw a pistol in the men’s hand, you were internally freaking out, but you didn’t want to freak out if the gun wasn’t real, that issue was solved really fast when you saw him put in bullets into the pistol, he loaded the gun up and aimed it straight past you and towards jungkook, jungkook even getting a paper cut killed you and hurt you, so seeing a gun being aimed at him made you freak out more than if the gun was aimed at you, before you could even say anything he pressed the trigger and the gun shot out, your body automatically stood in front of jungkook, the bullet felt like nothing for 2 seconds until you were in so much pain that you couldn’t even breath, you were breathing heavy and jungkook looked about ready to beat the man half to death, that was until you used your last strength to grab his hands and pull him into you, you blacked out, jungkook being super worried thought you died. (Let’s be real if I made you die then he would probably kill the guy and me...JKJK don’t eat me) You woke up hours later, a jungkook that was still crying, with the rest of bts who looked extremely worried too. “Oh my god, your awake, your awake, your awake and alive, im gonna murder that guy” You grabbed his arms again “Babe can you stay here with me, I’m scared, I don’t want you to go” “Okay, I won’t go anywhere, I’ll be right here” You found out later that the man had escaped the mental asylum, he was mentally ill and tried to kill anyone that got in his way, of getting to you and well basically ‘loving you’.

So this took me forever to write not gonna lie, towards the end it got kinda hard to write because I’m tired. But still hope you enjoyed this, and request away Anyways bye

[enthusiasticclouds-sally]

Mun Questionnaire!!!! 

PERSONAL DETAILS

Nicknames? Kiki, Ki, Little One, my co-workers mainly call me little one and it’s to the point where they legit have forgotten my actual name

Where do you live? Waterbury, Connecticuttt but I was born in Manhattan, NYC didn’t move to CT till I was ten

What’s your age? Freaking oldd: 25

Hair color? Right now it’s dark brown with like dirty blonde highlights, probably going to dye it all straight black pretty soon. I constantly change between the two tbh

Eye color? Dark Brown

Height? Jusssstttttt make it to exactly five feet

Date of Birth? August 23rd, 1992 :D

What’s your star sign? Virgo, legit on the day Virgo actually starts!! :DD

Element? Earth  

How many siblings? Two half-brothers: Carlos and Alexander from my dad’s side in where I’m the oldest and the only girl :DD and only child from my mom’s side

How many pets? Noneee, they legit all die on me so I do all animals a favor and just don’t get them as pets. They’d have a longer life without me xD

Obsessions? Skullssss, Disney, my hair because it drives me up the wall if it doesn’t look okay!! It’s bad I know, oh oh and SLEEPING!!! I adore sleeping it is my favorite hobby I can sleep my entire day away and be at bliss

Bad habits? Bite the nails, talk too fast, buying books that I never end up reading, buying clothes that still have their tags on it, procrastinationnnn, picky af eater, impatient. 

Phobias? MICE!!!!!!! I can’t even look at a mouse!!!! I promise you I will stay on top of whatever the freak I climbed on for the ENTIRE day if a mouse ran by I will NOT touch the ground. I will cry, scream, and enter a panic attack!!! No no no no no no no no!!!!

ABOUT YOU

What makes you happy? SLEEPING!!!! Skulls, Disney…. should really just direct you to the obsessions question… but also my laptop, my carrr!!!! Make-up!!! Hoodies, lots and lots of hoodies drown me in hoodiesss. Sunny days but also rainy days, Pokemon haha, my job on some dayss, MY BED, the dark, all of my hundreds of Disney pins, and gosh a lot of things make me happy tbh

What really irritates you? Headaches, being nauseas, stomach aches, snoring I really can’t deal with snoring and have no rational reason as to why… and this is awful but cuddling hahaha I’m just not a cuddling person… I kinda push you off after like a minute xD Residents I really can’t fucking stand our residents. I hate them. Oh!! Can’t forget waiting!! I’m impatient it’s bad, working on it though xD

What makes you sad? Tear-jerkers haha I hate those shits. Ummmmm I’m really not much of a sad person?? I mean I can add mice in here because they make me cry, but like they scare the shit outta me sooooo

What makes you angry? Drivers. Cranky rude-ass ungrateful patients!!! Like I don’t want to have to be dealing with that shit for twelve hours. Talking about patients, my job xD. I have a love/hate relationship with my job. People tbh haha xD I sound mean I swear I’m not!!! The cold, I really do not like being cold at all!! 

What makes you scared? MICE!!!!! I don’t even want to hear about them!! Any of my patients starting to crash even my babies. It’s really not a fun feeling!! Bugs, fuck bugs.

Who is your best friend? That would be Marie I have been friends with her since the end of fifth grade!!! She is also my complete opposite and is perfect at fucking annoying me, but I love herrrr. Sara is my bff tooo!! She’s my cousin though, but that’s my little buttercup and she’s like my sister, since I have none of those <3 

Ever broken a bone? Nope.

What was the last CD you bought? Oh damn an actual one??? Uhhh I think it was an Aventura one… their Last Project album I believe. They’re a Spanish band. Downloaded album was Pink’s new album I’m in LOVE with it.

What was the last book you read? The Only Astrology Book You’ll Ever Need by Joanna Martine Woolfolk

Who was the last person you spoke to? The mother

What was the last thing you ate? Soup :(( My stomach has been a little shit the past two days. I think I caught the stomach bug fml. 

What was the last thing you drank? Ginger ale because I can actually keep that down

What’s the best thing you’ve ever bought? Oh goshhh I buy SO MANY THINGGSSS!! Uhhhh MY CAR!!! She’s a beautiful 2016 Honda HR-V, I love her :DD My Kat Von D Shade and Light palette!!! I can’t live without that palette!!! Oh oh and my laptop!! She’s been a bit of a shit lately, but I do adore herrr.

What’s the worst thing you’ve ever bought? Ughh I tend to like everything I buyy

What’s the best thing you’ve ever been given? My Uggs!!! My mom got me them and I LOVE them

What’s the worst thing you’ve ever been given? I don’t think I haven’t liked anything that’s been given to me so far??

What are your future goals? Well it was to become a nurse and I ammmm so there it is and I’m even where I wanted to be :DD Maternity nurse with the babieesss :DD 

Describe your bedroom? A black bed. A big black dresser. Two closets…. I have a lot of clothes. Two mirrors, well three if you count my make-up mirror. I have a make-up dresser that’s black too with like a shit ton of make-up!!! Black curtains. White walls and the wall that my bed is attached too has pictures completely covering it in a checkerboard pattern. I’m pretty proud of it, it’s my favorite thing about my room! Oh and another wall has my car tax bill taped to it so that I remember that I have the next half of that shit to pay in January xD

Who do you consider the most beautiful woman in the world? I think Jessica Lowndes if GORGEOUSS

Who do you consider the most handsome man in the world? Ian Somerhalder is GORGEOUSSSS so is William Levy!!!!!!

Favorite thing to do on a hot summers day? Go to the pool, and lay out under the hot summer sunnn. I absolutely LOVE the heattt 

Favorite thing to do on a snowy winters day? Keep my ass in!!!! Curl under warm blankets and drink yummy hot chocolate

If you were granted 3 wishes, what would they be? Have all my bills/loans paid off for the rest of my liiiffeee, anything my mom would want, and idk probably a nice gorgeous house in the future

If you could go back in time to see or change something, when would it be and what would you do? I’d go back to my high school years and not date the douchebag of my ex

What’s the first thing you think about when you wake up? Can I go back to sleep for another hour?? haha

Do you believe in the after-life? I dooo

Where do you see yourself in 10 years time? I have no fucking cluee. I still see myself in the same profession though because I do love it deep down haha. Hopefully, though I’ll be out of CT and just somewhere different. 

What’s the funniest joke you’ve ever been told? I don’t really tell jokes I don’t think I’m funny at all :((

Any hidden talents? None that I’m aware of??? I mean I can sing?? Does that count??

Dream job? Currently doing it!!! Being a nurse :DD Even though I do have a love/hate relationship with it xD

Who is your hero? My mommmm

Describe yourself in 3 words: Introvert, sweet, sarcastic

FAVORITES

Favorite color? Blackkk I love pink too, but black way moree

Favorite number? 14

Favorite animal? Snow Tiger

Favorite sport (to play)? Umm I only ever cheer leaded soo cheerleading by default

Favorite sport (to watch)? Baseball and Football

Favorite Show(s)? Criminal Minds, Law & Order SVU, NCIS, Grey’s Anatomy and my guilty pleasure issss Keeping up with the Kardashians haha yes I hate myself for loving that show xD

Favorite movies? Titanic, Cinderella, Nightmare Before Christmas, The Corpse Bride, andd The Princess Bride 

Favorite band? Evanescence 

Favorite song? It’s constantly switching 

Favorite room in the house? My bedroom!!!!

Favorite food? Pizza!!!!! 

Favorite drink? Pepsi :DD Should I be drinking any kind of soda? Nope because I get kidney stones pretty often. Do I still drink my Pepsi like all the time?? YEASS

Favorite place? Disney World <3

Favorite cartoon character? That would be between Cinderella and Sally

Favorite day of the week? Monday and Thursday because I neverrrr work on those days!! 

Favorite day of the year? August 23rd!! :DD

Favorite season? Summerr

Favorite Holiday? Christmass 

Favorite girls name? Emily, Aria and I have to say I do love my name too!! Kiara is pretty 

Favorite boys name? Declan and Aiden

Favorite country? Italy

Favorite smell? OoOo I’m a very fruity person but cucumber melon is my absolute favorite!! 

Favorite sound? Rain falling, tapping of the keyboard, tapping of acrylic nails, a heart beat especially baby heart beats because they go really fast!!

Favorite accent? British

Favorite Ships (in or our of BDRP)? I love all the ships hereee!!!! I love all of my ships tooo ngl xD 

Favorite Fandoms? I don’t think I really have any???

PREFERENCES

Coke or Pepsi? Pepsi!

Pen or Pencil? Pen. I really don’t like pencils at all and won’t use one unless it’s a lead pencil 

Day or Night? Night all the way

Cat or Dog? Dog but I’m sadly very allergic to both :((

Summer or Winter? Summer!

T.V. or Radio? Radio

Brains or Beauty? Brains

Cup or Mug? Mug

Tea or Coffee? Coffeeee, but I’m not a huge fan or either tbh

Gold or Silver? Silver

Brush or Comb? Comb

City or Country? City

Early or Late riser? Late!!!! Look I get up at like 1pm the earliest. 

Blond or Brunette? Brunette

Scary or Romantic movies? Romantic haha Scary movies are too predictable to me I mean so are romantic but whateverr

Board or Computer games? Board gamess

Half full or Half empty? Half full

Happy and poor or Sad and rich? Happy and poor

Glasses or Contacts? Glasses

Flowers or Chocolates? Chocolate!! Please no flowers those die on me tooo

Love or Money? Love

Hugs or Kisses? Tbh hugss I love hugging!!! Just not cuddling though haha

[safyresky]

92 Truths

I’M SO MAD I WANTED TO BE THE DOUBLE TAGGER BUT @mellomadness BEAT ME TO IT?????? I was originally tagged by @thewayhistoryiswritten. They tagged the whole fam so now I am gonna just sneak in here and be the TRIPPLE TAGGER B)

This one is really long?? So if you’re not about people oversharing on the internet then just skip down using “J” or blacklist long post, cause that’s what I’ll tag this as :)

(I would put a read more but half the people who tagged me use mobile and those don’t show up on mobile so...my apologies!)

Anyway let’s get to it, shall we?

LAST…

[1] drink: hot chocolate. for those keeping up with my roll up the rim #struggles, 15/15 have NOT won. 

[2] phone call: Richard, my lovely bf who couldn’t remember the cereal my sister wanted

[3] text message: my sister who has no idea what food I have at home and is staying until Sunday and needs to eat

[4] song you listened to: One of the songs off the Steven Universe music playlist I have on soundcloud

[5] time you cried: Watching Moana last week it just gets me EVERY TIME the powerful I AM MOANA!!!!! I JUST YES. YES YOU ARE. YOU ARE AND I AM A WRECK

HAVE YOU EVER…

[6] dated someone twice: Nope

[7] been cheated on: In a way yes but also no.

[8] kissed someone and regretted it: Nope

[9] lost someone special: Yes.

[10] been depressed: low key all of last year? it was a struggle. and not like diagnosed depressed just...feeling sad ALL the TIME and WORTHLESS and people would tell me you’re great and I just wouldn’t believe them b/c it didn’t feel like I was great at all. I couldn’t even write about my shitty frosty children I just....couldn’t. I couldn’t do anything but think about how shitty things were going and how much I wanted to sleep and sleep and sleep and forget about life

[11] gotten drunk and thrown up: I have never gotten drunk to the point of throw up but hey, tomorrow is paddy’s day and my sister wants me to get “turnt” and “wasted” so we’ll see if I go over my comfortable drunk limit of 5 alcohols. Will keep you posted!

LIST 3 FAVOURITE COLOURS:

[12] Blue

[13] Light blue

[14] Orange (Were you expecting more blue?? Hehe)

IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU…

[15] made new friends: Yes!

[16] fallen out of love: No, I’ve just made my relationship STRONGER

[17] laughed until you cried: Oh my god yes I live in a house with 3 other immature young adults who are stressed to the max you would be surprISED how often one of us laughing until we cry happens

[18] found out someone was talking about you: Not in bad ways!

[19] met someone who changed you: I don’t think so, though my current friends may have effected my humour just a tad ;)

[20] found out who your true friends are: Yeah, actually! A lot of realizations happened this year let me tell you *side eyes my shitty pal who makes things about herself constantly*

[21] kissed someone on your facebook list: I mean Richard is my facebook friend so...yes? We’ve been dating for 5 years though so idk how much that counts?? Cause he’s my SO???

GENERAL…

[22] how many of your facebook friends do you know in real life: All of them I know well enough, I don’t add total strangers

[23] do you have any pets: My cat! Cinnamon! He’s so cute and such an affectionate lil bud for being a stray a year ago like what a cat I love him s o  m u c h he’s so sILLY

[24] do you want to change your name: I love my name very much. It can be spunky (Dani), elegant (Ella), and a mix of them both (Daniella!)

[25] what did you do for your last birthday: I turned 21 and...I actually can’t recall?? I think Richard and I went out to dinner and OH NOW I REMEMBER!

We went to the Works and he surprised me with all of my good friends being there and then we went home and he got me an ICE CREAM CAKE and my housemates put my gifts in a suitcase b/c we had no wrapping stuffs welcome to Student Life my guys

[26] what time did you wake up: At 7AM today b/c I had an 8:30

[27] what were you doing at midnight last night: I was messaging Ana bean and making my bed because my sister wanted to sleep and my sheets had just finished washing

[28] name something you cannot wait for: Summer! I have a job, I’m staying in Kingston, I’M GONNA PLANT SHIT!!!! IT’S gonna be gr8!!

[29] when was the last time you saw your mother: In February for reading week!

[30] what is one thing you wish you could change about your life: I wish my parents hadn't struggled so much when I was younger, b/c then I would have had decent RESP’s and wouldn’t owe the government so much money for school Dx

[31] what are you listening to right now: The chatter of nearby people eating lunch (I forgot my headphones today I’m real upset)

[32] have you ever talked to a person named tom: You know, I see soo many people in one shift that one of them was probably named Tom tbh

[33] something that is getting on your nerves: FIFTEEN (15) ROLL UP THE RIM TO WIN CUPS AND NOT A SINGLE WIN. EVERYONE I KNOW HAS WON SOMETHING BUT NOT ME I AM BITTER AF THIS HAS BEEN THE WORST YEAR FOR ME FOR ROLL UP THE RIM

[34] most visited website: this blue hellhole 

[35] elementary: St Herbert down the street from home. Everyone made fun of it and called it St Hubert’s, like the chicken place?? It bugged me as a kid now I’m like lmao yeah too bad they don’t have good chicken there

[36] high school: St Joe’s near my house! Commonly known as St Joe’s Hoes b/c there was a prostitute ring in the bathrooms in the 90s apparently??? And also everyone wore their kilts really high up. Those got banned. I was bitter I loved the kilt it was very warm

[37] college: Queen’s U! 

[38] hair colour: It is Chestnut brown, according to Laurentian pencil crayons (it’s dark brown enough that my boyfriend thought it was black for the first year and a half we knew each other hahaha)

[39] long or short hair: I like it longer because then I can put it up a lot?? Though mid-length is usually my go to

[40] do you have a crush on someone: Does my boyfriend count. B/c if so then hecka yes

[41] what do you like about yourself?: My eyebrows SLAY. I like that I have managed to build up my patience so much. I like that I’m super creative and helpful and I like that I try to be as supportive as possible and usually pals are like ye u are supportive which does me a GOOD right in the heart!! I am being a HELP!!

[42] piercings: just my ears!! i’ve always wanted a nose piercing ha but I wouldn’t go through with it, my pain tolerance is exactly 0

[43] blood type: No idea!

[44] nickname: Dani

[45] relationship status: In a relationship with the most WONDERFUL FLUFF EVER Richard is really gr8 okay I could talk about him for days what a guy

[46] zodiac sign: Libra

[47] pronouns: She/her

[48] fav tv show: Steven Universe

[49] tattoos: none. if I got one it would be a shooting star somewhere inconspicuous 

[50] right or left handed: right handed! for most things. I do use my left hand for odd things, like using a fork w/ a knife

FIRST… [51] surgery: wisdom teeth when I get them out this summer

[52] piercing: My ears when I was 2 months old or so

[53] best friend: PLEASE DO NOT AS ME THIS I HAVE MANY MANY BIFFERS (Richard, AJ, Ana, Jess, Athena...)

[54] sport: skiing 

[55] vacation: Mexico when I was 7! Maybe younger, I can’t recall. 

[56] pair of trainers: I just have converse?? Do they count??

RIGHT NOW…

[57] eating: Timbits

[58] drinking: Just finished a hot chocolate

[59] i’m about to: Finish a seminar response and then scream internally until I can go home

[60] listening to: People talking, still (there’s a lot of repeat questions here)

[61] waiting for: Class time

[62] want: A nap or two, a raise at work

[63] get married: One of these days! I keep asking Richard if we can just go to the courthouse and ELOPE but he keeps saying “yes let’s do that before we get married just go to a courthouse and wait on the big fancy ceremony until we can afford it!! He’s very set on being able to have a place for ourselves and such before hand which I agree with. But I still really wanna run to the courthouse one day and just fucking do it man)

[64] career: a writer with fame to rival that of J.K. Rowling, for instance, or the archaeologist who discovers Atlantis!

WHICH IS BETTER… [65] hugs or kisses: Hugs! I’m a really cuddly fuck but I love giving Richard kisses ALL OVER HIS FACE he gets soo happy!!

[66] lips or eyes: Eyes

[67] shorter or taller: Taller so I look cute when I attempt to be the big spoon, and so I can fit under the chin of my SO for MAXIMUM HUG

[68] older or younger: Older (irony b/c Richard is exactly 9 months older than me)

[70] nice arms or nice stomach: Both? Both. Both is good.

[71] sensitive or loud: Both? Both. Both is good.

[72] hook up or relationship: Relationship b/c I am not into the sex thing that much, occasionally yes but also not with a stranger?? I don;t look at someone like “I wanna tap that” usually my thought is “They’re pretty” or “I love their jacket” or “HOW DID THEY EYELINER???? THAT GOOD???” (Like ANA’S EYELINER OMG YOU ARE A MASTER AT THE EYELINER ANA PLEASE TEACH ME UR WAYS).

The only instance of “I wanna tap that” occurs like once in a full moon or two when I stare at Richard a v long time and thing HE IS SO WONDERFUL AND LOVELY I LOVE HIM LET’S GO RIGHT NOW INTO THE BED (TMI alert my guys, haha whoops)

[73] troublemaker or hesitant: Hesitant, though I can be a shit disturber, ask AJ. And Ana. And my other housemates, especially Richard. I can be a nuisance and have been confirmed to be an occasional menace >:)

HAVE YOU EVER… [74] kissed a stranger? Nope

[75] drank hard liquor? It depends on your definition? Sometimes I have a liqueur with my Dad but idk if it counts as hard liquor, it’s usually a Bailey’s

[76] lost glasses/contact lenses? ASK AJ I CONSTANTLY CANNOT FIND MY GLASSES B/C I CAN EVER REMEMBER WHERE I LEFT THEM

[77] turned someone down: In the most passive way possible. Fun fact: I once “friend-zoned” Richard, ha

[78] sex on first date? Heck no, I gotta know a guy or gal REALLY WELL before being like YES LET US ENGAGE IN COITUS, That is something I share with someone I trust fully and completely, not random people I meet on the first date (do people actually do that??) 

[79] broken someone’s heart? Probably?? I dunno

[80] had your own heart broken? Omg yes when I was a lil pre-high schooler, dear me

[81] been arrested? HA no

[82] cried when someone died? Heck yes! real people, fictional characters...I’m a mess

[83] fallen for a friend: Every crush I have ever had began with a friendship so yes

DO YOU BELIEVE IN… [84] yourself? Usually, yes!! I had a bad bout of thinking nothing would turn out right the past year but I’m back in the swing of thinking “It’ll be okay, you can do it”

[85] miracles? I think yes

[86] love at first sight? Love at first sight is a MYTH. Love takes time, patience. Love takes getting to know someone really well and knowing how you work with them and how they work with you. Love takes a lot and if love at first sight is a thing, it’s more like the IDEA of a person, not who they really really are.

[87] santa claus? For real, yes, I actually do b/c when I had lost my belief already, there was one year where my siblings (who had been naughty) weren’t on the christmas party lists at my parents work for gifts, and I was. So yeah. I have a solid belief in Santa make fun all you want idgaf 

[89] angels? Very much so. Ethereal angels and angels here I meet that have a profound impact on my life

OTHER… [90] current best friend’s name: I HAVE MANY but in no order, Richard, AJ, Jess, Ana, Athena... 

[91] eye colour: Brown

[92] favourite movie: Moana, Grease, Atlantis, El Dorado. Those are my top four. I think.

GOOD GRIEF THIS WAS A LONG ONE I HOPE YOU ARE HAPPY AJ, YOU TOO MELLO. @divinitycas here is a third tag because yolo?? I guess??? Anyone else who likes to overshare on the internet please, be my guest!!! AND THEN TAG ME I LOVE LEARNING ABOUT OTHERS!!

[ultrapandachan]

Mute rant

so this is very long, very emotional, and because I can’t talk, i need to like cleanse my soul and I dont’ give a fuck who reads it. to clarify, I use the verb said a lot, I don’t mean literally, i either wrote it, signed it, or texted it. I haven’t spoken recently.

Background story time: I lost my temper and I screamed so loud and so suddenly that I ripped something in my throat. Ripped or stretched, I am waiting to see which. I have like a 3/10 mild pain all day, and 10/10 when I make ANY noise. So, I have refrained from speaking for the last 2.5 days, and only made noises on accident. It is helpful that I learned some ASL in the past when I was first diagnosed with menieres, but it turned out that I have a migraine condition, not menieres. That itself is it’s own rant. Anyways, because i was properly diagnosed, my husband and family stopped learning ASL (except my sister, who is learning it because she loves the Deaf culture, and has made friends in her town that are Deaf). So, I have mostly been writing and texting my family members to communicate, and I  have previously hurt my wrist, and all of this unnatural increase in writing/texting is flaring up that old injury. So I have been using MORE and more asl, because it hasn’t hurt me. I will sign and write, but I tried to show them, hey, this sign means ____ so i can cut down on writing. My mom, who is normally so lovely and wonderful, has been getting increasingly angry with me and got to the point that she will flick me off instead of repeating the sign. It’s kind.... of extremely shocking because it’s so unlike my mom (who lives with me, btw). I have become more and more depressed (mind you has literally been only 2.5 days.).

My neighbor is much faster on picking up ASL, but she doesn’t call it ASL, she calls it charades. However, after a while, she will refuse to try and will only look at my mom, and talk with her, and not really pay attention to me. I knew D/deaf people had this happen to them, but I had never seen it happen first hand, and let me tell you, it’s soul crushing. especially if you’re a really active, vocal person normally, and this neighbor is my age and my friend.

My sister confirmed my suspicion that this will probably take weeks, or even months, to heal. My husband wants me to go to a doctor to confirm that i don’t have an actual tear that needs repairing, but doesn’t believe me that this will take a LONG time to hear. That i’m overreacting. Why can’t i make a sound. My mom walks in and they start talking. My mom isn’t even facing me, so she can’t see me sign, she can’t see  me silently sob. My husband keeps talking too fast for me to keep up and communicate back. I did have a text to voice app up, but they wouldn’t stop talking so they could hear it. and I at one point said, crap i forgot what I was going to say, and my husband looked at me and said why did i share that. and I think that was the last straw for me. I started to ugly sob (while trying to stay silent, because of the pain) and i wrote, if you lost your ability to articulate what is wrong and communicate even on a basic level, and your family was unwilling to help, you’d be upset too. I forgot because you guys wouldn’t stop talking and you KNOW!!! i cannot hear and think at the same time. I have a sensory issue. I think seeing me break down finally made it clear how insensitive they were being.

BUT! I followed up with that writing and texting, and even typing on my computer to an extent, is starting to hurt my wrist, and I didn’t want to re-injure it, my husband told me to stop communicating. Wrap up my wrist and stop writing/texting/typing and I looked at him  like he had literally ripped my heart out. he smiled and was like, just make noises like the dogs. they tell us what they want. He said because he was training for work that he didn’t have the time or energy or brain power to learn asl.

And that made me do another big.. big ugly cry. I said, the dogs can bark, they can bite you, they can walk to you and to the door. THEY DO ALL OF THE WORK to communicate with you. I literally cannot make a noise without much pain. I have been doing ALL of the work to communicate with you and i’m asking you to treat me better than you treat our dogs because I am your wife. I know you were trying to be cute, but goddamn it, this is really upsetting me.

My mom disappeared sometime during all of this, because my other sister was calling (and called me). My husband picked up and said sorry (sister), she can’t speak, if you want to talk, please get on fb messenger. and then my husband said how sorry he was and that he was being really rude and insensitive. after that, he started to ask what my signs were, take them seriously, and even used them too. He promised me that he’d do better, that he didn’t realize it was this painful, and going to take this long, and that i was this upset and lonely.

Before this big conversation between my husband and i, my sister (the one who is learning ASL, and is QUITE GOOD) and I were texting. I was mostly ranting to her at this point, and she kept telling me ways to work around it. and almost all of them were ways to text or type. That’s how D/deaf people handle it, so that’s how i should. Soo many misunderstandings have happened over the last few days, because I cannot get abstract or complex sentences out, and they keep talking too fast for correction, that at one point i’m like, thank you for your advice, it doesn’t apply to the situation. I had already at this point kept trying to correct her that my problem was compounded by my wrist ALSO hurting. I did say that I feel I have learned a lot about accessibility, and that talking like this is helping me edit myself (because I feel i am too wordy) and I said multiple times that this was such a short amount of time and it’s been HARD not being about to communicate. I KNOW IT’S ONLY BEEN 2.5 days and it’s already taken my ok mood (i wouldn’t say great because I did obviously have an anger outburst) to a very depressed, isolated one. I couldn’t imagine how hard and frustrating this is to all of the countless deaf or mute people where there isn’t even sign languages taught. And how mainstream communication habits are very hard to break for most people (like talking while walking away)

I have tried to let misunderstandings go, as long as they’re minor, because i’m tired of spending soo much time just trying to articulate it better. it also made me realize that most of my friends/family have BAD written comprehension skills. without the addition of spoken language, they don’t get the full meaning. IT MAKES ME APPERICATE HOW ALL THE TIMES MY HUSBAND SAID DON’T TALK ABOUT IMPORTANT THINGS OVER TEXT because jesus, most people are... bad.. at comprehension. And these are intelligent, thoughtful, wonderful people. makes me think about all of those internet arguments, and how different they would be in person (totally aside from the amminitity) 

Over all, these few days have been extremely taxing, extremely emotional and very educational. I am NOT trying to say i undrestand the plights of anyone, because I really have only a EXTREMELY small grasp of understanding.

I have ibs, i have daily bloating and normally 5-7 times a day worth of diarrhea poop. some days, I only go 3 times, some times, more. Now that i’m on medicine, i go twice a day, and it’s normal. Still working on that bloating. My mom has chronic rapid diarrhea for 23 years. within 20 minutes of her eating, it is out of her body. it used to be worse, meaning the second she swallowed, it was on it way out literally. some days, she can go up to 2 hours. Thats it. With my IBS, i can understand SOME of it. My sisters, when they have a stomach bug, and they said oh mom i know what you go through now, i want to laugh in their goddamn faces. yes, you know the literal pain, the timing, but you don’t have 23 years of that eating away at you. That’s what I mean, I have had 2.5 days worth of this, and i’m heartbroken. and my mind cannot even fathom how frustrating it must be otherwise when people are unwilling to meet you half way.

BUT in the same breathe, i know Deaf, deaf and mute people who are amazing and don’t look at it as a disability, and I by no means am here to police them into thinking differently. but i’m sure they’ve had growing pains at least somewhere along the lines. your new normal becomes your normal, and you embrace it, and it can make you stronger, and empathetic. And honestly, that is what i’m trying to do. Please pray, chant, light a candle, whatever, but please know i am trying to become stronger and empathetic over this. and understanding. but i’m in pain right now, physical and emotionally. and i just needed to rant, i didn’t need advice. If you’re still reading, bless your face, and i hope you know how special it is that you read all of this. that i was heard, finally, in total.

I am used to taking my “new normal” and making it awesome. I have IBS,  I have a migraine condition, I have depression, anxiety, i have weight issues, and i’m still awesome. I know this will pass and I will learn from it.