#sometimes i actually draw good and it gives me this unbeatable high

[nosferatil]

[thewritetofreespeech]

I don't know if you've done this before :( but could you maybe write about the Obey me brothers after an argument with MC?? Like a fight make up kind of situation??

400 years later.....

Well, maybe not that long, but certainly long enough. I'm sorry >.<. Hope this doesn't put you off on sending other things because I did like doing this one!

Obey me Brothers + MC After a Fight

Lucifer

It was late into the evening when you heard the knock at your door. Before you could ask who it was, you heard the even timber of Lucifer’s voice behind the door. “[Y/N], it’s me. May I come in?” There was a long pause than usual between his introduction and question, seeming to debate asking, or your response, before he asked it.

To be honest, he had a right to be cautious because you weren’t sure what your answer would be before you opened your mouth. “Yes. Come in.”

The heavy door opened and Lucifer stepped in. Prim and as well stationed as ever, but the confidence normally in his face diminished just the slightest. “I…came to apologize.” The words seem to want to drag out of his throat. Like it’s the hardest thing he’s ever had to say. Not the best start for an apology.

“You didn’t have to treat me that way.” You tell him. Telling you like a child in front of everyone. Getting your hand smacked for something you didn’t even do. No coming to give some lack luster, dutiful apology he doesn’t mean. “And don’t say your sorry if you’re not.”

“I am sorry.” Lucifer insisted, before he took a deep breath and tried to relax. “You’re right. I shouldn’t have embarrassed you like that in front of everyone. I was upset, and took it out on you. Sometimes you’re an easy target because I know you’ll care for me no matter what I do. We always hurt most the ones we love.” Your cheeks tint at the comment. Damn him and his suave words.

The demon makes the effort to cross the threshold and take your hands. “Please know that I am truly sorry for my behavior. I will strive to never make you feel foolish, or less than, again. My mission in life now is to show you how much more than I find you over everyone else.”

You roll your eyes a little at the comment. “Let’s not get carried away. You’re starting to sound like Asmo.”

You giggle when Lucifer gave a forced, disgusted shutter. He then lifted your hands to his lips and gave them a kiss. “Am I forgiven?” He asked.

“I suppose.” Annoyingly, he was right. You would always care for, and love him, so it was hard to stay mad at him for long.

“Good,” he said, with his usual prideful smile, “I’m glad. I do plan to still make it up to you though. So make no plans for Saturday.”

“Will do.” You agreed. Giving him a tiny salute. He then left to let you finish getting ready for bed. Ideas of how he’d ‘make it up to you’ swirling in your head.

Mammon

There was a sharp rap at your door that rung out clear in your room over your headphones. You were curious who was here at this hour, but got up to go answer the door before the tried again.

You open the door and are immediately confronted with a bundle of flowers being shoved in your face. Almost to the point of the blooms bursting against your cheeks. You stagger, at the afront of color, and the bouquet is pulled back slightly to reveal Mammon behind them. “I…bought you these flowers. To say I’m sorry.” The more he talked the more his voice trailed off. His normally confidence draining like the color from his face.

“Isn’t it rather cliché to buy someone flowers to apologize?”

Mammon flinched at your criticism. “I didn’t know what else to do. If you don’t like them I’ll buy you something else. Anything you want! Just please…talk to me.” Please forgive me, was what he was really saying.

You look at the demon for a moment. His defeated stance not fitting into his character at all. Ironic, since the fight was about Mammon being too full of himself. Confidence was one thing, but ever now and then it was too much, and when you tried to talk to him about it he turned on you. He had immediately regretted it, but you refused to talk to him for several days after to cool off.

Apparently, that was the worse punishment he could think of.

“You don’t need to buy me anything Mammon. I’ve already forgiven you.”

“Really??” He asked. Seeming unsure of what he’d heard or that he could trust you.

“Really.” You repeat, and immediate find yourself in his arms. Your flowers falling to the floor as he hugged you.

“Thank you [Y/N]! I’ll never do anything stupid like that again! I promise!”

“Well now, let’s not make promises we can’t keep.” You tease. Patting his back. “We all make mistakes Mammon. I’ll be angry with you sometimes, but I generally forgive you. How can I stay mad at my ‘First Man’ for long?” His hold on you tightened a little. It lingered for a moment longer before he let you go.

“Yeah. Right. Don’t you forget it.”

Levi

You were getting ready to head downstairs when there was a knock at your door. It was a surprise, since you were going down to meet everyone. So who was up here now? You open the door and find everyone’s favorite otaku, out of his hole and in front of your door, staring at you.

“Y-Y-You…You weren’t answering my texts.” Levi finally got out.

“That should have been a hint.” You tell him. Perhaps a bit more curt than need be.

The bluenette straightened in alarm before his shoulder slumped again. “I know. I’m sorry! But I couldn’t stand the thought of you being mad at me! I know I can get a little…-“crazy?” You interjected –“excited about my games and stuff, but I really didn’t mean to snap at you!”

The two of you had been playing some new quest game that was all the rage apparently on the deep otaku net. Supposedly it was unbeatable. No one had actually ever seen the final boss ending yet. Which of course meant Levi was determined to be the first. Confident that his eons of experience wouldn’t lead him astray.

Sadly, the legends of the unbeatable game were true. And after hour after hour of crushing defeat Levi snapped and took it out on you. He’s locked himself in his room after. Ashamed, and upset that he hurt you; if his texts were anything to go off of.

“I threw the game away and I’ll never play it again. I promise! I’ll never go all rage beast mode on you again as long as I live! Just please forgive me and talk to me again!”

“Oh Levi, it’s not that serious.” You insist as you reach out your hand to his clasped ones in front of you. Reassuring him. “We all get a little crazy when things don’t go our way. I forgive you. In the future lets try to play games that are a little less….taxing on our relationship, if we can manage.”

“R-R-R! Relationship!” Levi stammered. Turning bright red in front of you, which made you giggle. You lean in to give him a kiss on the cheek. Really frying his circuits. Maybe it was a little bit out of you missing Levi when you were fighting. And maybe it was also his ‘punishment’ for the fight as well.

Satan

Tucking into your homework for the evening, you look up from your desk when there was a knock at the door. It was sharp, to the point. You immediately knew who it was, and debated not answering. However, that would be rude and a level of pettiness not even you could manage.

“Hello Satan,” you greet when you open the door. Correct in guessing who was there. “How can I help you?”

The blonde seemed wounded by your formality, usually such a champion of manners. But he was a clever man and knew you were doing it to put some distance between you. “I came to apologize.”

“As you should.” Ok. Maybe you were a little pettier than you like to admit.

“You’re right, and I should have been here sooner. I was just….embarrassed.” Satan ran his fingers through his hair. “He just makes me so angry sometimes! Being so high and mighty. Bossing us around. I try to keep it under control but….I can’t.” Given he is the Avatar of Wrath, it’s a wonder he made any effort to keep his rage in check. Everyone says he was getting better though. Even his relationship with Lucifer was getting better; even with this spat. “It pains me more than I can tell you to know that I upset you in the process. Turning on you like that like an idiot when you were only trying to help. It was so stupid.”

“It wasn’t very like you.” You admit, and Satan gave a single, bitter scoff.

“Maybe not now. Maybe with you.” Cautiously he reached out his hand to take yours in a gentle hold. “But I am sorry. Please know that I’ll strive to not let my anger get the better of me again.”

“I’m sure you will.” You said. Squeezing his hand back. “And, I forgive you. I should know by now not to get involved with any of your fights. But I care about you all so much.”

“But you care about me most, yes?” He asked with a soft smile. To which you giggle and kiss his cheek.

“Yes. I care for you most.”

Asmo

It was late afternoon when you heard the knock at your door. Typically, everyone was off doing their own activities at this hour, so it was a surprise to have someone looking for you. You open the door cheerfully at first, but then frowned. “Oh. Hello Asmo.”

“Hello [Y/N]-kun.” Asmo greeted brightly, but you could tell it was forced. “I…wanted to come see you. To apologize. For acting so ugly earlier.”

It’s not often that Asmo lost his temper. He usually left that to his silly, older brothers. Rising above in dignified beauty, as he liked to put it. But every now and then it got the best of him, and his tongue was sharper than any knife in the draw when he got that way.

“What you said really hurt Asmo.”

“I know,” he admitted frowning. “I haven’t been able to sleep all night thinking about it. Look at these bags!” You frown as he pointed to his under eyes, and he realized he was being selfish again. “I’m sorry I said such awful things the other day. I don’t have an excuse or fix for it. Except to say that I’m sorry, and I hope you forgive me.”

You let out a soft sigh at his words. He did seem sincere. It was a little odd to see Asmo so down. “Alright, I forgive you.” The demon immediately perked up with his usual smile and took your hands in his.

“Thank you [Y/N]! Let me take you out shopping, as a further apology. I’ll buy you anything you like!”

“So we’ve resorted to bribery now?” Asmo giggled at your joke and you nod. “I’ll right. I guess it wouldn’t hurt to get out. Anything I want?” Asmo nodded and made some suggestions on what you could spend his money on as you walked. Inevitably ending up on lingerie, which earned him a smack.

Beel

You had just gotten back from class when you heard the knock at the door. It startled you. You had only just gotten back a moment ago, so what remarkably good timing.

You finish taking off your uniform jacket before you open the door. Startled, yet again, to find Beel behind it. “Beel?”

“Hi [Y/N].”

An awkward silence filled the space, one that hadn’t been there since you first arrived in the Devildom, before you spoke. “I uh…was going to change. I just got back from class.”

“I know. I waited for you to come back.” The red head confessed. Nervously scratching the back of his head. “I wanted…to talk. I wanted to apologize.”

“You don’t have anything to apologize for.” You reply. Now nervously scratching the back of your head as well. “If anything I should apologize.”

Beel was so sweet and kind. But sometimes, his ‘space cadet ways’ over anything that didn’t involve food or fitness was very hard to deal with. He’d forgotten you were supposed to meet, yet again, so when he showed up an hour late for your date yesterday you had given him an ear full. He’d been hurt, but took it. Now you just felt bad, like you had kicked a puppy, with it over.

“But I should have remembered. It’s not fair that I forgot when we were supposed to meet. Again.” He looked upset with himself and fidgeted with his hands. “I really am sorry I forgot. I don’t want you to think you’re not important or anything. I’m just dumb.”

“You’re not dumb!” You scold Beel. Not accepting him putting himself down like that. “Can’t we just agree that we’re both at fault. You should have remembered, but I shouldn’t have yelled at you either. Can’t we just….make up? I hate fighting with you.”

Beel smiled softly and leaned forward to give you a hug. “I hate fighting too. I think I’ll be ok if we both take blame. That seems fair.” He let you go and stepped back. Seeming back to his usual, easy going self already. “Do you want to do a make up date? If you’re free. I can take you to Madam Scream’s or we can go get Fire Iceies.”

You giggle and nod. “Sure. That would be wonderful.”

Belphie

It was so late at night when you heard the knock at your door that, initially, you thought you dreamt it.

Hearing it again, you woke up and threw on your robe over your pjs to go answer the door. Groggy, and a little concerned as to who could be here at this hour. Something must be wrong.

“Belphie?” You question in a whisper. “What are you doing here?”

“I came to see you.” He said. Remarkably less groggy than you were for a change. “I had to see you.”

“In the middle of the night?” You question. Getting more alert and annoyed at being woken up by him.

“Yes. I couldn’t sleep. Imagine that.” His fingers twirl at his long bangs while he looked down at the floor. “I came to apologize.”

“Apologize?” You repeat. Shocked, more than anything, that he was here to apologize. Not that he did deserve an apology to you, you just didn’t think he’d do it.

“Yes. To apologize. Can we make up now?”

“That’s it??” You remark after his ‘apology’. “You say you’re sorry like that and I’m just supposed to forgive you?”

“Yes. That’s how apologies work.”

“No it isn’t!” You snap. Louder than you wanted to with the late hour. You set your teeth and wheeze through them. You don’t want to start another fight. “You apologize because you feel bad about something and want to make it up to the person. It has to be sincere.”

“I am being sincere.” Belphie insisted. “This is sincere as I get.”

“Well it certainly doesn’t feel like it.” You reply. Crossing your arms.

It was Belphie’s turn to sigh at you. “Look. I’m not like Asmo or the others who are great with words. I came to apologize, and that’s it. I was wrong and I wanted to say I’m sorry. That’s the best I can do.”

“Why do you even want to say your sorry? If you don’t sound like you mean it.”

“Because I hate you being angry with me.” You blink in surprise at Belphie’s confession, and he sighed again. “I hate it. I hate not talking to you. I don’t care what anyone else thinks of me, but if you hate me, I can’t stand it. So, I came to apologize. To do anything so you wouldn’t hate me anymore.”

You uncross your arms and scrunch your lips a little bit. “That’s a better apology.” He looked back up at you with a questioning look. Seeming surprised that he had ‘done good’. “And, I don’t hate you. Just because I’m angry with you, for good reason, doesn’t mean I hate you. I could never hate you.”

The demon smiled softly. His expression tired, but hopeful. “Thanks [Y/N].”

“Now, we need to get back to bed. It is the middle of the night after all. And we have school.”

“Ok.” Belphie agreed. Then stepped into your room and made way to your bed.

“In your own room mister!”

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #326

“life by life  /  waste to waste  /  i'm the harbinger: the master of decay”

When you get married what do you think you’ll put most of your focus and money into? Do you mean like, for the wedding? Probably the venue. Or possibly the photographer. Have you ever had a teacher that also taught your parents? No. What’s something you complain about frequently? My legs. Are you afraid of falling in love? Very. Are you close to any of your aunts/uncles? Not very. Do you hate it when people smoke around you? Very much so. Do you own anything that is special edition? Yeah, things like DVDs. Do you have any funky bookmarks? I have this one meerkat bookmark where the image moves when you tilt it. Did you ever watch Pokemon? Hell yeah I did. Are there more females or males in your family? Females. Does anyone in your family snore loudly? My mom does due to having gerd. Dad did too when I actually lived with him. I wouldn't know nowadays. Do you own a camera tripod? Yes. Did you ever believe in mermaids? No. Have you ever purchased alcohol? Yes. Any essential quirks/interests/other you look for in a boyfriend/girlfriend/partner? Similar interests, like being a metal fan and gamer especially, as well as a serious animal lover for sure. Any romantic gestures you really like? Okay if someone did that little bow thing while reaching out for my hand to dance, I'd melt, lol. I also appreciate love interests holding open doors, SHOWING INTEREST IN HOW I FCKN FEEL, asking permission before doing anything in sexual exploration, stuff like that. Any sexual fantasies? Are you daring enough to share one? Yep, not sharing those lmfao. Have you ever been in love? Twice. What is your favorite/least favorite word? My favorite is "serendipity/serendipitous," and my least favorite is "retarded." Have you ever been skinny dipping? No. If I actually had a body I was confident in, I probably would in privacy tho at night lmao. Have you ever had a crush on a fictional character? Oh yeah. What is your favorite thing to do? Probably RPing with my favorite OCs when I'm in a really creative mood and during a great scene. Did you go to your senior prom? Yeah, I did. Prom's honestly pretty damn overrated, but I did it and his senior prom anyway. It's the picking out a beautiful dress and taking pictures that I loved. What did you do after graduation? I don't remember. We probably went out to eat or something. Favorite home cooked meal growing up? Spaghetti. What item most embarrasses you to purchase? Nothing, really. Do you give cards to people for holidays or events? No. Name the coolest thing about one of your grandparents. Uhhhhh idk. Name two things you put whipped cream on? I hate the texture of whipped cream. Do you ever eat peanut butter straight from the jar? Sometimes if I want a snack but am trying to be healthy-ish, I'll eat just a scoop. What was the last pill you took for? Pain. Do you prefer your clothes loose or close fitting? Loose, 100%. Favorite thing you’ve ever painted? Meerkats grooming. I did it in high school on a large piece of burlap. Are there any songs that remind you of your mother? "Take It Like a Woman" by Alice Cooper, for one. How did your elementary school teachers describe you? Very smart, sweet, friendly, and nice. Game you were best at in PE/gym? Pf, none. Obsession from childhood? Dinosaurs and Pokemon. Best way for someone to bond with you? Let's talk about deep stuff regarding the world or about how awesome animals are. Top 5 favorite Vines? Oh boy. There are just way too many. I'll try to name a few: 1.) the "I can't find my berries" saga guy; 2.) *in drive-thru, asked what he would like to order* "I wanna FUCKIN DIE"; 2.) "i cOUldA DROPpeD my CroISSAnt"; 3.) "it's Wednesday, m'dudes"; 4.) "a d a m"; 5.) "I WON'T HESITATE, BITCH." God, I miss Vine. What is the first meme you remember seeing? Holy cow, I have no idea. Sci-fi, fantasy, or superheroes? Fantasy. Favorite tradition? Dressing up for Halloween, even though I don't do it anymore... Talent you’re proud of having? Writing. Favorite website from your childhood? Webkinz was unbeatable. I was obsessed. Any good luck charms? I don't believe in those. Favorite potato food? French fries. Tell me the color of your eyes, without using the name of a color: Uhhhh a cloudy sky right before rain? Ever been through a goth phase? Goth is my fucking AESTHETIC. I wish I could afford a truly gothic wardrobe, because you bet your sweet ass it's all I'd wear out. Can you remember your first phone? If so, what kind was it? I think so? It was a Blueberry, I believe. Who is your favourite character from Alice in Wonderland? Obviously the Cheshire cat. What is your favorite type of YouTube video to watch? Lately, it's been tarantula and snake channels/pet YouTubers. I still think my overall favorites are let's plays, but right now it's just stepping back a bit. What’s the next project you are excited to start? I have this pretty cool drawing I wanna do of a morbid meerkat doing a big toothy smile, doing a peace sign (but his fingers are syringes) with a crown blinking over his head. Inspired by the "Professional Griefers" lyric of "lab rat king." I just really wanna make it perfect and am procrastinating in fear of failing... Have you ever experienced a miracle? I don't think I believe in miracles. What are your top three names you like for a daughter? Alessandra, Justine, and Chloe, to name a few. Which did you like better: high school or college? High school, at least in most ways. What is the theme of your bedroom? It doesn't have a theme. My interests just kinda threw up everywhere, haha. Have you ever lived in a dorm? No. Were you raised religious? Yes. Do you do your own taxes, or do you hire a professional? I don't have to do taxes yet. What was the very first thing you ever saved up to buy with your own money? Venus was the first big thing, I think. Describe your favorite Christmas ornament: I don't know what that would be, honestly. We have so very many. What jobs did your parents have when you were growing up? Dad's always been a mailman, and he also had a second job as a carpenter for a while. Mom worked with special needs children at my elementary school as a teacher assistant. She also worked at the hospital at one point, doing some computer work. I don't remember her actual position. Are you taller than your mom? We're the same height. Would you marry someone if they were unable to have sex? Sure, that's not a big deal to me. Last reason you went to the ER? For myself, a suicide attempt/overdose. What was the last word document you typed? This survey, actually, so I could save progress as I combine them. What’s something you don’t think people take seriously enough? Global warming. Have you ever dated someone who had a child from a previous relationship? No. Is there any drama currently going on with your family? No. What was the last fruit or vegetable you chopped/sliced up? An apple. I wanted apple slices with peanut butter. What is your favorite Hostess/Little Debbie snack? Holy SHIT that is impossible. Maybe the devil cakes, but I really don't know. I love most of them. Do you/your family buy loaf from the bakery or bagged on the shelf? Bagged. White, wheat or other? Mom buys white bread, but my favorite is pumpernickel. What was the last non-fiction book you’ve read? (Not a school textbook!): I ain't got a clue. I don't really read non-fiction. What color are your headphones/earbuds? These are blue. Would you be embarrassed to find out you snored loudly in public? Yep. Thankfully, I don't snore. Do you feel guilty about killing bugs? Yep. How do you feel about coconut? Not a fan. ^ Ever cracked one open? Ha, I've always wanted to. Who did you last worry about and why? My mom. She's getting a CT scan ASAP due to chronic headaches and stomach pain, so I'm worried her cancer might be re-emerging. When was the last time you ate/drank something gross just to be polite? I don't know; I struggle to do this. If I don't like something, my face shows it. I can't help it. When did you last make up a baby’s bottle? Never. Do you have any framed black & white photos in your home? Who are they of? No. What’s the most expensive thing your car needed to get done? N/A If you had a thousand dollars to spend on a pricey brand you like but can’t really afford (until now of course), which ONE brand would you chose? I don't know. Real talk, I find most luxury brands to sell pretty ugly stuff... Do you like candy canes? Yeah. Do you still talk to any of your old teachers? Yes; one is my landlord. What color was the dress you wore to your senior prom? It was black. Ever go to another school’s prom? No. Do you like burning candles or incense? I love incense. Do you ever venture into the woods? What do you normally do in there? When I used to live in the woods, I did every now and then to take pictures. Does your significant other ever make you mix CDs? Single, but that would be so romantic. /swoons How did you dress your freshman year of high school? I was this emo/metalhead/goth creature. What is the best present you have ever received? My dog Teddy. <3 What is the best present you have ever given? I put the most effort into a scrapbook thing of well over a hundred reasons I loved my then-boyfriend Jason. Even though we're done, I honestly hope he still has it, just to remember. What is the best surprise you have ever had? Sara's parents paying for a flight up there to be with Sara for her birthday. Have you ever been robbed? No, thankfully. Ever kiss someone on the first date? No. Ever sleep with someone on the first date? Definitely a nope. Ever give someone a wrong phone number on purpose? No. What’s the strangest thing you have ever witnessed firsthand? I have no idea. It's... very morbid, but possibly dogs twitching after being euthanized. Seeing Teddy do it was such a strange, painful experience. Like there was still life in there... even though I know it was just his nerves doing their final hoorah and he was already dead. Ever seen a psychiatric ward? I've been in a mental hospital five or six times, so I'm uncomfortably familiar with them. What is the last thing you did that you didn’t want to do? Group therapy. I'm really burning out on it. Thankfully, I don't have it on the weekends. What is the last thing you convinced someone else to do? I dunno. If you could live in a different time, would you? When? Nah. Do you prefer to sleep alone or with someone else? Sleeping alone is more comfortably physically, but I usually prefer sleeping with a partner because there's this amazing feeling of safety, love, and companionship. How many pillows do you sleep with? Two. Do you prefer cold air and blankets, or warm air and no blankets? Cold air and blankets by ten miles. I can't sleep if I'm even remotely hot. How often do you dust? Sigh, not as much as I need to. What is the most "extreme" activity you have ever done? I haven't done very much that fits that description... so idk. Dr. Pepper or root beer? Dr. Pepper. I hate root beer. Last room you cleaned? Mine. Last thing you did that made you feel like an adult? Checked into the doctor's office by myself, haha... Talk about sad. What’s your favorite picture of your mom? Dad? It's not my business to actually share those pictures, but I can describe them. I fucking ADORE this candid photograph I took of my mom laughing; I will forever cherish it. It's morbid to think about, but it's absolutely a picture I'll frame of her once she's passed away. I don't have many pictures of Dad, but I do really like this picture we took together at Red Lobster once. Are you subscribed to anything (Magazines, monthly boxes, streaming sites, etc.)? Mom pays an Adobe Creative Cloud photography bundle subscription for me, but that's it. Last TV show series you finished? Fullmetal Alchemist with Sara. It was a rewatch for me, but she'd never seen it. What’s something exciting that’s happened to one of your friends recently? A childhood friend got engaged a few days back. Do you have any board games? If so, where do you keep them? We have a few somewhere. What were the last things you glued together? I don’t recall. What are your friends’ pets’ names? I'll just use Sara here since she's my best friend. She has two family dogs, Buster and Beesly, a cat named Winter, four ball pythons named Martha, Crowley, Little Dot, and Jane Marie, and Doris, a bearded dragon that I personally adore most. :') What all did you do today? I played World of Warcraft early this morning, but not for very long. I've been in a phase of being very uninterested in it lately. I've mostly just done surveys... lots of surveys. I'm just in the mood to. I've also been listening to music and watching John Wolfe play Amnesia: Rebirth periodically. If you live in a house, how many floors does it have? If you live in an apartment building, how many units does it have? It's just one floor. Would you like to live in a world with mythical creatures, even if they turned out to be evil or dangerous? Honestly... I probably would, haha. Are you scared of heights? Yes. When was the last time you lost something of great sentimental value? Did you ever end up finding it again? Never, I think and hope. What food do you find to be the most filling? Is this something you eat a lot of? Eggs or oatmeal. Not really. What do you think of people who purposefully train their dogs to fight or to be aggressive? They're fucking garbage human beings. If you suffer/have suffered with acne, do you squeeze your spots or do your best to just leave them be? Ugh, I was so bad (and still am if something pops up) about picking at it. Does your father have any hobbies? What are they? Sure. He loves sports, fishing, idk if he still plays video games, fantasy football... and I can't forget playing with his grandkids. It's hard for me to know all of them when I don't live with him and see him rarely. What did the last face mask you wore look like? It was just a white cotton one. Is there a specific song that you always request at parties? What is it? I don't go to parties. Would you rather read poetry or write poetry? Write it. Have you ever had any really infected injuries? I've had infected piercings as well as a badly infected pilonidal cyst. Is there any band out there that you like every song by them? No. Are you popular on any websites? No. What was the last song you listened to? Aaaaand now I'm hooked on "NIHIL" by 3TEETH. Are you currently texting anyone right now? No. When was the last time you played jump rope? Yikes, probably not since I was a kid. I used to love it. Who was the last person you offended? I dunno. What’s the earliest you’ve ever had to wake up for work? Not early. Do you know anyone who has changed their first name? I know trans people who have, yes. Do you know anyone who has been on life support and survived? No. At least, I don't believe so. Do your parents have a strong relationship together? They're divorced, and Mom at least can't stand him. Dad doesn't really care. Do you ever feel like you’re sharing too much about yourself online? Oh, I absolutely used to. I still might, idk. I've tried to reel it back some. How many windows are in the room you’re in? Eight, but they're just small, vertical rectangles stacked together, so it's not as revealing as it sounds. What was the last necklace you wore? My spiked choker, I think, for pictures. Or maybe the one I have with a bunch of big silver skulls. Do you think there are more dimensions than what we’re able to perceive? I don't think so, no. Does anyone in your family have schizophrenia? My half-sister on Dad's side that I've never met. Have you ever been in an abandoned house? A shack, yeah. Do you like art? I positively adore it. I could NOT imagine life without it. How about theatre? I don't care for it. Have you ever made breakfast for someone? Yes, for Sara. Do you talk to your crush? If you have one. Yeah, she's my best fren. If yes, what do you usually talk about? Nowadays I ask her almost daily how she's doing in regards to her progress of recovering from both serious physical and mental stressors. I try to always be an available ear if she ever wants to vent. Would you rather read or watch a video about something? Watch a video. In what ways have you fulfilled some of the hopes and dreams you had as a teenager? I've fulfilled none of those. What’s one stressful thing you’ve been trying to deal with lately? How have you been dealing with it? Inexplicable, chronic boredom/serious anhedonia. I've just... put up with it. I get pleasure out of essentially nothing most days, and it sucks big time. I just try to distract myself and force myself to do things I usually love, though I've been bad about actually succeeding in making me do said stuff... Is there a regional chain of store/restaurant/etc. in your area that you feel very loyal to? MOTHERFUCKIN BOJANGLE'S, BITCH. You think YOU have good fries somewhere? Oh hunny, sit down. Oftentimes, people warn us against getting tattoos or body modifications or dying our hair unnatural colors because we could be judged poorly for them. But has a more “alternative” look ever worked out in your favor? Well, I like myself better with my piercings and tattoos, and that's all that really matters to me. Do you have any daily routine/habit of that you’re really proud of keeping up? No. .-. Pick one of the following activities to do in a forest (assume you would be equally good at each one of these): Foraging for mushrooms, identifying trees, searching for specific types of bugs, trying to build something out of fallen branches and logs. Searching for bugs w/ my camera!!! But that all sounds fun. What’s the hardest class you’ve ever taken? My most recent math course that I failed horribly.

[housebeleren]

Throne of Eldraine Limited - Premium Uncommons

Wrapped up the Commons, now it’s time to start working through the Uncommons of Throne of Eldraine Limited. Often, these will be the powerhouses of your deck, helping to win games when you don’t get to your bombs. Let’s take a look.

White

All three of my top White Uncommons are creatures, which is unusual. Archon of Absolution is an efficiently costed flier that will immediately slow down any assault your opponent will be throwing at you, as they’ll have to choose between playing spells and attacking, which should give you ample time to stabilize. Protection from White is an interesting additional bit of text, but helps protect it from other White fliers and removal, but it’s just a little perk. The main hotness is a 3/2 flier with an incredible defensive ability. Easily the best of the color hoser cycle. 3.5/5

As is, a Wind Drake would already be a solid pick for any deck. But this does so much more. You’re likely to have a few creatures that this immediately buffs up, and it’s going to be straight-up bonkers in a dedicated Adventures deck. I’d pick this early and try to draft as many Adventure creatures as I could. 3.5/5

Syr Alin is a powerhouse for sure. He’ll completely own ground combat, as 4 Power with First Strike is incredible on offense and defense. Once he starts swinging, he casts Charge on your whole team, which will lead to some big swings. I predict he will be good. 3.5/5

Blue

Once again, Wind Drakes are solid picks to begin with. But this has the chance for a really explosive start, animating a cheap Artifact to come out the gate swinging. If you don’t have targets, just cast the creature right away, and it’ll still be good. 3.5/5

This is some solid removal for Blue. It’s efficient and it pretty effectively neutralizes anything. Yes, it’s susceptible to bounce, but for the most part, this will take care of anything you want to take care of. 3.5/5

Syr Elenora isn’t as good as Syr Alin, but she’s still solid, if for no other reason than she replaces herself with a card draw. Once she’s down, she’s resistant to removal and will gum up the board pretty quick. In the late game, you can start hoarding Lands to build her into a real threat. 3/5

Black

Epic Downfall is some super efficient removal. It’ll get rid of any big threat for a minimum of outlay on your part, and it even exiles it so they can’t get it back or something. Premium removal for sure. 3.5/5

Foulmire Knight is one of the easiest 2-for-1s in the set. Most of the time, unless you really need a turn 1 creature or you’re mana screwed, you’ll want to cast Profane Insight first, effectively making this a 4 mana play, though you can split it up over multiple turns. Once it’s down, it’s taking something with it. A great, flexible card. 3.5/5

Syr Konrad has a wall of text that basically says whenever a Creature card does anything with a Graveyard, he’s going to ping your opponent. That, plus a solid body for the stats, make this a formidable mid-game threat and one that will close out the game given enough time. 3.5/5

Without a Knight, this is a 2 mana Prey Upon, which is fine but not great. With a Knight, it’s more like a Savage Punch, which is a substantially better card. Assuming you have enough Knights in your deck, it should be pretty easy to set this up in your favor. 3.0/5

Slaying fire is good at three damage and great at 4 damage. But unless you’re heavy red, Scorching Dragonfire might actually be better. But, assuming it shouldn’t be too hard to get Adamant, they’re about equal. I’d probably take the Uncommon first, as it has a higher ceiling. 3.0/5

Syr Carah is a bit anemic on stats, but if you successfully untap with her, she gets bonkers really quick. In theory, she could let you impulse draw every turn, while still pecking in for bits of damage, and that’s lots of card advantage. I’d absolutely run her in every Red deck. 3.5/5

Green

Beanstalk Giant seems really good. He’ll ramp you early on, which helps cast himself, and once he’s down, he’s going to be the biggest creature on board by a long shot. I can’t imagine a Green deck that doesn’t want this. 3.5/5

Keeper of Fables seems absolutely bonkers, and is my vote for “Mythic Uncommon” of the set. On stats, it’s already a solid playable. But the fact that it grants curiosity to all of your non-Human creatures is just insane. If your opponent leaves themselves open on turn 4, you can draw a pile of cards off this, especially in Green/Blue, where you can make use of Blue’s evasion. I am starting very high on Keeper of Fables. Prove me wrong. 4/5

Of the five cards in this color hoser cycle, this is my second favorite. A 2/3 Deathtouch with Curiosity is already a decent creature for 4 mana. But if you can get this out for 2 early in the game, it’s just insane. That won’t usually happen, but this card is going to either draw you cards or it’s going to take something down with it, and that’s a card I’m interested in main decking. 3/5

Multicolored

I’m starting very high on Grumgully. He’s decently costed as-is, and if he sticks around, your creatures are going to get out of control very quickly. Red/Green is usually a deck with big creatures, and this just ensures that yours are always the biggest on the board. 3.5/5

I’m similarly high on Savvy Hunter. Same basic mana cost, same solid baseline stats. There are very few repeatable Food generators in the set, and that makes Savvy Hunter one of the most valuable creatures in the Food deck, assuming you don’t get brick walled too early. Pairing this with something like Bog Naughty seems really strong. 3.5/5

Of all the cards in this 4 mana cycle, this one seems by far the best. Once he’s down, it doesn’t take much for it to run away with the game, as it will be nearly impossible to block favorably, and it will keep your life total high as well. I’m assuming you’re in W/B to play this, since it does get worse if you’re trying to run it on just one of the two colors. 3.5/5

Most of the other Signpost Uncommons & 4-Mana Uncommons are solid, as well, but these three seem particularly good. With that, let’s run through all the other cards as quickly as we can.

All That Glitters - It’s a decent payoff for the Artifacts/Enchantments deck, but the floor is very low and it is vulnerable to removal. I’d only run it if you have at least 7 or 8 other Artifacts & Enchantments. 2.0

Deafening Silence - Don’t be the person running this. It’s not worth a card, even as a cheap Enchantment for W/U. 0.0

Glass Casket - This card is super solid, and you’ll always run it. But, it is still conditional removal, so you don’t want more than 1 or 2. 3.0

Rally for the Throne - Raise the Alarm this is not. One extra mana makes this way worse, and the amount of life you’ll gain off of it is not worth it. They’re not even Knight tokens, so they don’t synergize either. If you desperately need filler, go ahead, but mostly I’ll pass. 1.5

Righteousness - I don’t love that it only works on defense, but let’s face it... you’re always winning combat with this. I’ll play one copy in most White decks. 2.5

Shepherd of the Flock - This is one where the two modes do not add up to much more than the sum of its parts. I get that you’re supposed to bounce an Adventure creature with this so you can recast it, but unless you get a Bomb like Realm-Cloaked Giant, I just don’t think it’s much better than filler. 2.0

Venerable Knight - I’ll start reasonably high here. It’s an aggressive start for the Knights deck, and once it dies, it leaves a gift behind. I’d always play it in Knights decks, and sometimes in other decks. 2.5

Faerie Vandal - On base stats, this isn’t great, but it shouldn’t be at all hard to get it up to a 2/3 or higher. Then it’s great. 3.0

Hypnotic Sprite - This one seems good in non-Humans decks, and can eat a small spell in the early game. Too many people will hold it up too long rather than just playing it on-curve thought. 2.5

Into the Story - Most of the time, this shouldn’t make your deck. If you’re in the dedicated U/B deck with some enablers, it becomes much better. But start cautious with this one. 2.0

Mystical Dispute - Most of the time, this is Convolute, which is playable but unexciting in Control decks. 2.0

Overwhelmed Apprentice - It’s easy to get scared off by the wall of text here, but really this is a 1/2 creature with Scry 2 on ETB, plus it helps enable the U/B deck payoffs. It’s probably not worth it if you aren’t in the archetype, though. 2.0

Sage of the Falls - The stats are a bit underwhelming, but a 2/5 that loots on ETB isn’t the worst thing in the world. In a dedicated non-Humans deck, this gets way better in the late game. 2.5

Turn into a Pumpkin - 4 mana is a lot to hold up, but bounce+draw is always a potent effect, especially in tempo decks. The Food text is mostly just decorative. 3.0

Belle of the Brawl - Belle of the Brawl is efficiently costed and threatens a lot of damage, particularly in a dedicated Knights deck. 3.0

Bog Naughty - Bog Naughty is a reasonable flying threat, and in a deck with Food, gets way better. Time will tell how the format shakes out how easy it is to get the payoff. 3.0

Cauldron Familiar - In a dedicated Food deck, this could be really annoying as a perpetual blocker that drains for 1 every time it reenters. But I fear a lot of the time it won’t be worth a card. Exercise caution. 2.0

Cauldron’s Gift - If you have some amazing targets, knock yourself out, but Rise from the Grave isn’t always great. Make sure you have some bombs to grab. 2.0

Order of Midnight - This, on the other hand, seems like it will always be good. A pretty easy value proposition that’s relevant early & late. 3.0

Revenge of Ravens - This is really bad. Just... bad. Don’t. 0.5

Specter’s Shriek - If you find yourself against a heavy Black deck with unbeatable bombs, go for it. But never maindeck and probably don’t even board it in most of the time. 1.0

Burning-Yard Trainer - This honestly seems decent. It comes in with a trick, threatens a huge amount of damage if they leave themselves vulnerable, and is a relevant creature type. I’ll run this in any Knights build. 3.0

Claim the Firstborn - Threatens are never great, but one that can only grab small things is worse. There aren’t even lots of good sacrifice outlets, so I’d skip this one unless you open great synergies. 1.0

Embereth Shieldbreaker - If you need a 2 drop Knight, this fills that curve. Occasionally, there will be a target for it, and then this is actually good. 2.0

Ferocity of the Wilds - If there’s a hyper-aggro non-Humans deck in this format, I’ll reconsider this. Otherwise, it’s a lot of nothing. 1.0

Mad Ratter - It doesn’t seem too hard to get at least one activation off this, in which case it’s paid for itself. Any more than that, you’re doing great. Not every deck wants it, but the ones that do will love it. 3.0

Redcap Melee - The downside is real, but so is the efficiency. Especially if you run a low curve deck, it actually doesn’t super matter. Just don’t run this if you’re trying to ramp beyond a 4-5 CMC top end. 2.5

Skullknocker Ogre - The effect is super random, and just as likely to help them as hurt them, so really this is just a 4/3 for 4. Which is playable, but not exciting. 2.0

Edgewall Inkeeper - Super anemic on stats, but if you have even a handful of Adventure cards, it will more than pay for itself. 3.0

Flaxen Intruder - The creature by itself is not particularly worth it, and the Adventure is too expensive to reliably get to. I would only run this if I was deep on Adventures and needed more cards. 1.5

Giant Opportunity - If you can generate some early Food, this is a super strong turn 3 play. If not, it helps set up any other payoffs you may have. Good in the Food deck, not good anywhere else. 2.5

Kenrith’s Transformation - Against major bombs, this is good removal. But a lot of the time, it runs the risk of upgrading their creatures or basically not doing anything. Side in & out appropriately. 2.5

Once and Future - It’s a bit costly for this effect, but if you have particularly good cards to reuse, I could see it. 2.0

Syr Faren, the Hengehammer - Why is this the only card in the cycle that isn’t 3CC? Bugs me to no end. Partly because of his casting cost, Syr Faren is worse than most of the others, since it will be harder to drop him on-curve, and you really want him down turn 2 to work. 2.5

Trail of Crumbs - If you’re super deep on Food, this can be good, but you want lots of Food generators and outlets before it’s worth it. 2.0

Drown in the Loch - I’m going to start on the premise that this is good, but it does have conditions that will sometimes not be met. But in these colors, you should be able to make it great. 3.0

Improbable Alliance - If you have a lot of ways to get this to go off, it will be the best card in your deck. But it does require the right build. 3.0

Inspiring Veteran - In these colors, you should have plenty of Knights, so I predict this will usually be good. 3.0

Maraleaf Pixie - The stats on this are good as-is, but it also helps you ramp, which seems extra good. I’d always run this. 3.0

Shinechaser - This is playable if you have either Artifacts or Enchantments, and bonkers if you have both. But if you don’t have any, it’s not worth it. Plan accordingly. 3.0

Steelclaw Lance - In a dedicated Knights deck, this is potent, but you definitely want plenty of Knights before running it. 2.5

Wandermare - A 3/3 for 3 is decent to begin with, and it shouldn’t be hard at all to get this to 4/4 or bigger. I’m a fan. 3.0

Wintermoor Commander - This really wants a bunch of buddies and it wants to go sideways. But, baseline, it’s a cheap Creature with Deathtouch, so you could do worse. 3.0

Arcanist’s Owl - I’m going to assume with all of these cards that you’re in the color pair that they want, since they all get much worse trying to cast for all one color. In W/U, I like the owl, since it’s a solid evasive threat that will sometimes find you another card, plus it itself is an enabler for the archetype. 3.0

Covetous Urge - The dream with this card is to exile a crazy bomb that you can cast against them, but a lot of times you’d just rather this be a good creature on its own. 2.0

Deathless Knight - Sacrificing Food gains you life, so.. that’s a thing. I like big, self-recursive creatures. 3.0

Elite Headhunter - I really wish this had one more point of power for it’s cost. The ability is solid, though. Seems like it will overperform. 3.0

Fireborn Knight - Double Strike is no joke, and this threatens a ton of damage really fast, and works well on defense too. 3.0

Loch Dragon - A nice sized flying threat that smooths your hand and triggers other cards in the colors. Seems solid. 3.0

Oakhame Ranger - Both halves are a little overcosted, but they feed each other really well. I’ll start optimistic here. 3.0

Rampart Smasher - I mean... he’s a 5/5 for 4. Seems good. 3.0

Thunderous Snapper - Decent stats for the cost, and if you have any bigger monsters lying around, he’ll draw you cards for them. You only need him to go off once before he’s great. 3.0

Clockwork Servant - It’s going to be a little tough to guarantee 3 of the same color on turn 3, but it’s not the worst topdeck in the late game, and that makes this solid all around. 2.5

Enchanted Carriage - I mean, at least it makes its drivers, which is better than most Vehicles. 2.0

Heraldic Banner - Helps fix your mana and adds a little power to the board. Not bad, all said. 2.0

Inquisitive Puppet - If you really need an early Artifact, this will do the trick, but it’s a pretty mediocre card. 1.5

Lucky Clover - In a dedicated Adventure deck, this could do some work, but a lot of times, the effect just isn’t overly worth copying. I’d run this only if I thought I could get at least 3 activations off it. 2.0

Shambling Suit - I mean, it’s an enabler and a payoff for the W/U deck, but I’d basically only run it in that build. 2.0

Sorcerer’s Broom - This is cute, but you really want to be in the Food deck before it even works, and even then it’s a bit costly. Technically, it’s also an Artifact for W/U, so I guess that’s a thing. 2.0

Spinning Wheel - Mana fixer early, tapper later. It’s expensive to activate, but that’s all just upside to the baseline mana rock. 2.5

Witch’s Oven - This seems pretty good actually. It’s super cheap and costs nothing to activate, and you can use it in response to removal or unfavorable combat to get Food out of the deal. I see this being a good card in the Food deck and passable elsewhere. 2.5

Tournament Grounds - Fantastic in Knights decks, unplayable everywhere else. You’ll know if you want this. 2.5

So that’s it. All the Uncommons. One last to go, and that’s the Rares & Mythics!

[metaldragoon]

When I was younger, I was really excellent at most athletics.  Not the best sprinter, but I still represented my school in the 100M and was unbeatable at 400M, 800M, 1500M, and high jump.  I played on the best school for soccer and basketball, and while I would never say I was “sociable” I was still surrounded by friends.  That was only until I was 10, so you might attribute to physically maturing at a faster pace than most kids, since I was also the tallest to go along with the fastest and most athletic.  My parents were starting to split up, they never officially divorced until I was like 14 but at around 8 they started living separately with small stints of living together again, and so I was mostly a daycare kid but I was with one of my best friends there and the only kid as athletic as me, though fortunately for track day he was a year older than me so I never had to compete against him.   My mom decided to get back in to teaching once I turned 10, which she had stopped since she was pregnant with me to take care of me, which I feel like makes so little sense because she worked at casinos and stuff until like 2 AM so I never saw her anyways, but, digressing, she found a full-time position.  Some desolate northern town where it reaches -50 and it’s a 4 hour drive to the next town.  I honestly was quite okay with the idea of moving.  I feel like most of my friends had moved and i was like cool, sick of being the lame-o with 40 year old parents and only lived in one house.  Also, being in a tiny town with no competition and training for sports all my life, I was like a whale shark in a fish tank, destroying all school records for my track events, and I feel like success never really mattered even, it just felt nice.  But each year there, being that it’s winter for about 7 months a year, and, weird of an excuse as it may be, the bugs and mosquitoes there are... so aggressive, it’s either too cold or I’m going to be choking on bugs and scratching my self of all my bites or getting bitten by fruit flies.  The sun is so affected by seasons, it’s dark at 3 PM in winter and sunny until 2 AM in the summer.   The point of these excuses is just that I lost my athleticism.  I am still above average, I guess, but I was slower than the year previous each of my 3 years living there.  People never ragged on me about it, I guess they just assumed I didn’t care was the reason, but I knew I just wasn’t as good as people anymore.  Kids that didn’t even play sports could keep up with me.  This is not very pitiable, but after losing all my friends from moving away, to lose my athleticism took it’s toll. My dad moved away from that northern town as my parents were officially done trying to be together, and I moved with him because I don’t know, I guess again it just felt exciting to be somewhere new.  I feel like as a kid all those complaints still didn’t really bug me, this is just looking back at the things that made me.  We moved in to some apartments, and while I would say I really enjoyed my time there, I guess this would be when I started having “depression.”  I never really felt like that’s how I felt.  My dad would work 3PM until midnight, sometimes I’d see him before he’d go to work, he’d make me dinner for me to eat later, and then I’d be by myself, playing computer games and listening to music and talking to lots of people online.  I’d make sure to go to bed around 11 so he wouldn’t know I stayed up, maybe have a little cry some nights because I don’t know, that just felt relieving, which of course it is, but whatever.  I lived about 20 minutes from school, so I’d walk myself to and from basketball practice and soccer was on the weekends so my dad would drive me there, and outside of that that’d be the only time I left the house unless my dad wanted me to go grocery shopping or something.  Something about my dad is that he is... stoic? completely unemotional? I don’t know.  I love him, and think he’s great, but he is not one for talking to his son about anything at all.  He disciplines me on the important things of life and is very reliable, but I feel like there’s no joy in his life or joking around, which I guess I just felt was normal since he was my only real contact.  I guess that’s why I liked being online so much.  I could be emotional and talk about things and be silly without thinking I’m disappointing my father, since he has no idea what I’m doing. I started having a lot of ankle problems, which I feel like honestly didn’t really affect my life, it just meant I missed time in sports, and eventually in Gr. 10 my knees started to go, which came to me giving up sports in Gr. 11 because the pain of practices just became too much and coaches weren’t willing to let me just use that as an excuse to only play in games.  Gr. 11 I moved with my mother who once again moved to some tiny remote town and I followed her, this time definitely under the influence of her emotional instability and feeling guilted about that.  I feel I really hit my low there, as I talked about with my injuries.  The town didn’t even have a soccer team and our basketball team was a joke anyways before I quit.  I was weighing about 250, I still feel like I was pretty athletic, but my knees would give out on me even just walking.  I feel I’ve always had this “pushing my body to extremes” from childhood that I’ve never adjusted to, because in my head I know I can work harder than anyone and succeed because I’m more athletic, and eventually they’ll give up, but they don’t because I’m not more athletic and it just destroys my body.  Maybe my adrenaline rush is just stronger than others because I feel like coughing and being completely out of breath, knees stinging and it being hard to walk because my feet are throbbing was just regular after a game but looking at it now I’m like there’s no way other people dealt with that.  Anyways, I don’t know, I’m just trying to say it was a very low point.  Ever since I heard Caitlyn Jenner talk about how all she did was train for the decathlon and football and everything when she was younger as just being referred to the “great distraction” for her transgender thoughts, which she didn’t understand and just thought were wrong ro something, I’ve found that pretty relatable.  Sports to me were the same things, a way to not be thinking about everything shitty about life.  Without that it was pretty much thinking about is killing my self worth disappointing my parents and making them think they did such a shitty job of raising me? Because that’s not what my suicide is about, and I don’t want them to blame themself, but I know it’s impossible to not.  That was basically my saving grace.  I’d also become pretty infatuated with a girl who I’d been friends with for about 3 years or so.  I know she didn’t like me back, as I had told her my feelings and she told me hers, but there’s always hope that she just hasn’t noticed what there is to like about me yet.  Looking back I feel like a “white knight nice guy here’s my fedora” fucking loser, but I like to also think I was a lot better than that too.  We were best friends and basically all my life was just typing to her and attending school.  My general sadness became directed towards her not liking me, because I always felt that yeah I’m a loser but I know I’m just in a bad spot and I have a lot of potential to be great... and for the person closest to me not to see that or be attracted to it when everything about her is attractive to me was really like a crushing blow to any kind of comfort I would have found in her.  Of course, she still was a great comfort but y’know, you go to bed alone and have insomnia and it’s hard not to focus and drive yourself down this negative road of how pathetic you are. I don’t know, Gr. 12 got a lot better as I moved back with my dad and got in much better shape and actually wasn’t afraid to express myself in English and actually got above C-’s in class.  My dad was living with another woman who’s now my step-mother and her son, who served as a wonderful little brother for me.  I still was a shell hiding in my room at home, but at least I’d have someone in person to joke with instead of devoting it all to my best friend with whom I would throw my emotions up and down on the roller coaster of my mind.  The year went by fine, I played more basketball and soccer and football.   I wasn’t the best, but I was still good I guess My dad, cold as he can be, had no interest in taking care of me past school, so the day after I graduated I moved away to my mother, where I stayed for a few months before moving with my friend in Winnipeg.  I went thinking one, she’s the only good thing in my life so I’ll at least be happy there, and two, hey, most people online “overrate” them self so it can be hard to be attracted when there’s that doubt, maybe the in-person version of me is what she’s been missing out on and I can still make her love me! Naive, of course, but I lived there for a few months.  It was good, but unfortunately I just wasn’t able to get a job and frankly I don’t know how the fuck people figure it out at that young of an age where they just get good jobs or apply to all the right things for post-secondary.  I moved back to my mom’s place, but she had moved in with her then-boyfriend, so I lived in her house she owned as just like an actual tenant, alone in a basement suite.  Those were some very cathartic times, I had a job as a dishwasher with 4 days on 4 days off, 6 hour days, so it would just be me doing absolutely nothing for 4 days until I worked.  Art, or talking to my friend more, drawing a bunch and reading and stuff.  Forming an obsession with Depeche Mode and anime.   Anyways, after moving away from Winnipeg, you know, it was really clear she wasn’t ever going to love me, I mean, it was probably plenty clear objectively a long time ago, but to the blinded fool that is metaldragoon he still always had hope.  But you know, I tried my best, showed her everything I was, and all I would do is cry all the fucking time about it and be miserable so to me I just decided I can’t be friends with her, ‘cus this is killing me.  I don’t remember what I said, but basically just said I didn’t want to talk to her.  I feel cutting her out made everything grey in life, I honestly didn’t get sad anymore, sure I’d cry here and there, but for the most part I didn’t feel negative because I wasn’t trying and failing, but not trying didn’t bring much happiness either.  It was an interesting time in my life, maybe a couple years, where I just wanted to exist and do whatever I did with my life back then.  Playing old games. Eventually I moved out of my mom’s and in to my aunt’s, got a job and moved out there to a basement once again, and lived there for I guess about 6 years.  That’s when I got in to Tumblr, a nice grey place for my grey existence, mindlessly reblog and eventually I got in to GIF making and I got praise for work, even if it waesn’t really “praise” but let me tell you a fucking like or a reblog on a GIF is some real juice and I became pretty devoted to that.  I’d just come home from work, scroll through my entire dashboard, and watch anime just to make GIFs of it.  Fa’ years!  Eventually I started befriending fellow GIF-maker unit-02, dishing out hot GIF tips with her, but of course no one can dish hot GIF tips without getting to know eachother a little better.  Eventually we started really talking the way I hadn’t talked in a long time, and it really felt great to have someone like that in my life again, and it’s gone so much further than any kind of relationship I’ve ever had with anyone.  I told her once I’ve never felt like I was truly the single most important person to anyone before, and it’s true and really quite... I don’t know how to put it better than extremely lame, but, quite a good feeling. Anyways, that’s basically my life.  I wanted to explain all that just to kind of not find a good way to talk about what I wanted to.  Over the last four years, I’ve started working full-time, 40hr weeks.  I’m married now, for almost a full year, and doing okay in life.  I own a house that costs me a lot of money and I make more money than I was ever thinking I would.  But the problem is, work has robbed me of self-reflection, it takes up so much time, I just don’t have time to think of things, sad or otherwise.  I’m married now, I always have someone who wants to talk with me, so even on the free times I did have to think about things, there’s someone there “for me” which is, of course, good, but it prevents me from delving in to my true mind.  I just want more freedom in life again, and all that negative shit that comes with it, I want it back.

All the important years of my life I’ve been depressed, and it’s what makes me who I am.  I want happiness, but I want to be the real me, more.  A man of self-reflection and deep-thinking.  Instead I barely pay attention to conversations because I have too much other shit I have to deal with, and I don’t even have shit to deal with, but my mind is just melted or something with all the shit I have. For now I tell my self to keep grinding, and eventually I’ll have everything and I can stop and return to who I was, but that’s a lot of time and who knows if by then I’ll ever be able to recover who I was?

[yehosera]

Brotherhood Open 2018

Last Sunday, I took part in the annual Brotherhood Open in London. It was a 26 man event, with people traveling from around south England to take part. Once again, Alex did a fantastic job of running the Final Fantasy and Johnathan Southway recorded feature games that will appear later on in the week on his Youtube channel. 5 Rounds of Swiss, best of 1, then top 8 cut, best of 3. Standard stuff.

The Brotherhood - https://www.facebook.com/TheBrotherhoodGames/

I would seriously suggest checking out Brotherhood Games, in terms of value for your money, this place is unbeatable in every card game.

Team Chocobo - https://www.facebook.com/TeamChocobo/

As I don’t know when the videos are going up, just check in there a few times during the week.

Top 8 decks - https://ffdecks.com/tournament/the-brotherhood-open-2018-uk/6221148165505024

Earth Wind v3

https://ffdecks.com/deck/5980057877086208

--Generated By FF Decks (www.ffdecks.com)--

Deck Name: Earth Wind V3

As Seen In Tournament: The Brotherhood Open 2018 (UK)

Forwards (20):

2 Delita (4-087)

2 Y'shtola (5-068)

1 Zidane (3-056)

2 Barbariccia (3-066)

3 Dadaluma (4-085)

2 Vanille (1-093)

2 Wol (5-075)

2 Zidane (6-044)

3 Cecil (5-086)

1 Hugh Yurg (6-077)

Monsters (3):

3 Cactuar (4-058)

Summons (10):

3 Hecatoncheir (4-093)

3 Hecatoncheir (1-117)

3 Diabolos (5-062)

1 Titan (6-075)

Backups (17):

3 Moogle (XI) (6-058)

2 Semih Lafihna (5-059)

1 Thief (5-055)

1 White Mage (6-047)

1 Masked Woman (3-076)

2 Miner (5-082)

1 Ajido-Marujido (6-064)

3 Star Sibyl (5-091)

1 Minfilia (6-079)

1 Shantotto (1-107)

1 Tama (4-086)

Best Card: Hecatoncheir

I cast this card multiple times whenever possible. It was fantastic every time the card was cast. The only reason the deck was able to out-perform some of the other decks was because of this card.

Worst Card: Hecatoncheir

Without Enna Kros, my forwards aren’t actually that big, so the Hecatoncheir was almost never usable.

The Event

In the end, I finished top 8, losing on time in my top 8 match. The only thing to blame for the loss was me, as I wasn’t thinking properly about time, I forgot it’s 0, 1, 2, 3 and not 1, 2, 3, 4 so when the turn timer was on 2 during my turn, I thought I had another turn to catchup on damage and did not remove his last blocker before attacking. So yeah, big mistake, but a lesson learned; pay more attention!

Swiss

Round 1 - Lightning/Wind, this game was recorded, so I don’t need to go into too much detail. Essentially a turn 2 Hugh Yurg got hit by a turn 2 Al-Cid. I then played a Vanille and the rest of the game is my opponent destroying 4-5 Vanilles and 4 Dadalumas. Zidane pressured all of the forwards out of his hand, so eventually my opponent just ran out of stuff to do and died.

Round 2 - Earth/Fire, this game I drew the nutty nuts with Hugh Yurg and 2 copies of Moogle (XI). So while I was powering through my deck, he was stuck on 1 backup the whole game.

Round 3 - Earth/Water/Wind, I got backup stuck and had no Hugh Yurg to save me. It’s worth noting, in all of the previous games I was backup stuck, however, Hugh Yurg was able to save me. This game was only remotely winnable because of Zidane. While I was stuck on 2 backups, he was on 4 with Yuna Rikku and Moogle (XI); it was going REALLY well for him. Due to the nature of Zidane, one answer to him is to play all of your forwards to remove the on attack efficiency, this prompted my opponent to play 3/4 forwards in a turn just to avoid the on attack effect. Once Zidane attacked and confirmed there were no more forwards in his hand, Shantotto was able to clean house. I ended up losing to deck out (as he has Rikku and I have no Rikku, no Archers and the deck self mills a lot). So while this game was a loss, it really showcased the power of Zidane and Shantotto as a catchup method.

Round 4 - Water/Wind Gullwings, on paper an unwindable matchup, however, thanks to Hecatoncheir it becomes a winnable one. Again, stuck on 2 backups while he was on 4/5. The main turning points were both copies of Zidane pressuring all of the forwards out of his hand, ensuring that assembling YRP was impossible, and Hecatoncheir removing 2 Minuws and a Maria. While the matchup is straight up unwindable if they assemble YRP and a copy of Y’shtola, the deck does have the tools needed to harass their cards and prevent them getting off the ground with ease.

Round 5 - Ice/Earth, I was behind all game until surprise surprise Zidane was played. Again, the Shantotto + Zidane dynamic came into play ruining all of his fun. This game Titan closed out, by picking up a 3 for 1. I attacked with Zidane, in response to the effect, he discarded his hand to use Hecatoncheir on my Zidane, this allowed me to cast Titan on a different forward he controlled. Thus removing the forward Titan targeted and pumping Zidane up to enough power to turn his own Hecaton against him.

Top 8

Round 1 - Mono Water, with the other 7 decks in top 8 having at least 1 water card in them, it was unsurprising to be playing vs a water deck. With the games taking over 70 minutes, I physically cannot remember the play by plays and each swing point during the match. Game 1 I was grossly unprepared for and basically didn’t know what I was doing. Thinking my usual gameplan would work was wrong. So for game 2 I adjusted, it’s just a fatigue matchup. 1st thing to do is make sure Cagnazzo does not net them more than 1 point of damage. That’s done by clearing away every forward that’s played except for the little things Dadaluma can always remove. 2nd is to resolve Hecatoncheir as much as possible. In game 2 I resolved 4 and in the game 3, I should have won, I once again resolved 4. This means the games take FOREVER, as every turn it’s about working out how you’re going to reach this eventual game plan of Hecatoning everything and living long enough to do it. The game dynamic shifts from remove his stuff and attack him to an awkward game of never discarding Hecatoncheir or Diabolos, never playing forwards until he has something he does not want to Famfrit away OR you have a Vanille on the field, and simply never casting Shantotto.

The Deck

Forwards

Delita, only really in the deck because of Vanille. If the 2CP Hecatoncheir leaves the deck, then so will Vanille and by extension Delita. I also would not play Vanille without Delita, so he really does live and die by the Vanille.

Y’shtola, I normally just play 1 of her. I don’t like using her action ability and she shouldn’t really die once played. I opted for 2 in this deck because of Zidane and Vanille, cards that are hard to remove synergise with more cards that are hard to remove, as such she made the cut for 2. Also, Titan on this bad girl sounds tasty.

Zidane, despite playing the 4CP Zidane, I just cannot see Earth Wind functioning without this copy. He also works a bit with Delita, I was able to play both and remove an Ashe from both the hand and the field. The things Zidane does for this deck are so great I would rather risk the name conflict than play without the 3CP Zidane. 1 of him is fine, he feels so powerful 2 sounds like a really good idea, but it’s not a great draw all of the time, it’s more about waiting until you NEED to remove something powerful from their hand. Useful tip, just remove the highest impact card, don’t bother doing things like removing a backup because it might make their next turn awkward (unless if the backup is important, Minwu etc) or removing a card that has the potential to remove Zidane (he’s not here to protect himself, he’s here to protect your mid-game), just try and remove as much gas from their hand as possible to help ease up the mid game pressure.

Barbariccia, was kinda uneventful, she can go back to 1. As nice as she is, I didn’t play vs other Dadaluma decks, making the effect not very powerful. I tried to use her as a combat trick with Star Sibyl once if my opponent blocked, however, they didn’t take the bait :(.

Dadaluma, powerful card etcetc. I don’t have much to say on him, other than, don’t over value the card sometimes Cecil is more useful.

Vanille, she was extremely useful. Even without Delita, being able to filter those useless 2CP Hecatoncheirs out of my deck was a godsend. Also, vs high levels of removal she’s just fantastic. She has synergy with Barbariccia and Cactuar in so far as blocking her is likely to get punished and she has some synergy with Diabolos and Titan, as if they remove her to avoid the cards being used as combat tricks she does come back. I liked the card a lot and would like to find a way to keep her in the deck.

WoL, kinda useless. I like 2 of him to have just enough mid game gas. Wouldn’t suggest dropping him down to 1 or up to 3. 2 Seemed just right.

Zidane, what a power card. The Shantotto synergy described earlier is out of this world. Sometimes he lets Moogle’s retrieve cost 0 CP, he is a definite contender for being a 3 of. Maybe over a Barbariccia. Having Titan or Diabolos in hand makes attacking with him vs just about anything beneficial and having a WoL to support the Genome gives people an exceptionally hard time. What makes Zidane so powerful is when he’s played as the 2nd threat onto the board. There’s little point playing him as the first piece of action (unless you’re desperate like I was quite a few times in the tournament), he shines as the thing that tips people over the edge. A card like Dadalume or Vanille takes a turn of setup to be ready to remove efficiently, once Zidane comes down as the world’s largest lightning rod, he suddenly ruins whatever they were setting up for leaving your other threats to go an extra turn unanswered or he goes unanswered. The added dynamic of simply not being able to save forwards until it’s beneficial to play them applies a LOT of hidden pressure. It’s not something that’s easy to notice during a game, but once you notice what it’s doing to their turns the card becomes abusable. Also, sometimes he gets Famfritted and you sit there contemplating life.

Cecil, fantastic, do not cut Cecil down to 2. It’s easy CP early game and soul crushing in the later stages.

Hugh Yurg, was more on a trial run than anything. I wanted to see if cutting down 1 copy of Semih would be okay if I played him over her. He was strong, REALLY powerful with Tama during the early phases. Where possible I’d like to keep him in the deck. As a turn 2 play he’s powerful and as action during stalemates he’s also powerful due to him filtering the deck by a bit, the EX burst is a nice little bonus. Not mandatory in the archetype, but a nice little addition in place of a tech card if you’re unsure what to tech vs. He could easily have been Psicom Enforcer for example, however, I didn’t believe I would see many monster decks so took something generically useful instead.

Monsters & Summons

Cactuar, it’s fine at 3 obviously, as one of the win conditions is assembling Dadaluma + 2x Cactuar. I did not miss Leyak in this deck.

Hecatoncheir, this 2CP letdown is an easy cut. Yes, it’s powerful with WoL some of the time, but I really hate giving my opponent the chance to react to my removal cards. In a deck that has at least 1 card that increases the power of my forwards Hecaton probably shines a bit brighter.

Hecatoncheir, this 3CP powerhouse is an easy auto include. I would play 6 of this card if I could.

Diabolos, again 3 of this card as it’s an easy +2 Wind CP during the early game that wins the game later on. In this deck as it does not have the safety net Urianger Phoenix and Leyak provides, knowing that if something spooky happens being able to untap all of my forwards inspires some confidence while deciding how many forwards to attack with. It’s basically picking up a lot of the slack that the Urianger portion left behind. Defensively it can untap your forwards like Leyak does and offensively it can be used as removal in place of Phoenix. Basically, this card’s REALLY important as it does everything.

Titan, has some really nice art.

Backups

Moogle (XI), best card in the deck because it searches Hecatoncheir. I want to try playing the card at 2, but that can wait.

Semih Lafihna, not much to say about her. REALLY good when you draw Star Sibyl.

Thief, I actually only drew this card once. So I’ll give it a fair chance as it does synergise with Zidane and he’s my new 2nd favourite card.

White Mage, was crap. I had it vs a Viking deck and never wanted to discard a card to use the effect or leave the CP open to use it. It’s just not worth the extra effort to use. I’ll try it again as maybe having an easily breakable Wind backup is worth the struggle, but I’d rather just have that 1 copy of Archer. Leila as a 4CP entry effect break a backup is actually really good, so I’m supposed to use the card vs Devout and Miner? But, Hecatoncheir already does that. So it’s not worth playing the White Mage.

Masked Woman, fantastic card, got a huge buff with Moogle (XI). Being able to search her when you need her instead of relying on luck to do so is a HUGE boon for the card. She’s very unlikely to be going anywhere and I would suggest every earth deck plays her at 1.

Miner, fine at 2. Same as always. I’ve actually started using the effect to retrieve Cecil a lot more. It’s really good with Moogle (XI) and Delita helps solve the issue I used to have with Miner. I always found it hard to use Miner’s effect and do something productive other than play the forward during that turn, however, Delita is cheap and is productive with Vanille on the field, so there is some potential for 3 Miner in this deck.

Ajido-Marujido, I’m still yet to use the cast a summon modifier. It’s just always better to get back more Hecatoncheir. That’s not to say the card is not amazing, I’m sure when I use that modifier it’ll be for effective lethal. Ajido does something the deck needs, it increases the summon count by 2. As such I find the card to be exceptionally powerful. I would REALLY like to add a copy of Asura to the deck to use the untap 5 modifier with her off of 4 backups. With 4 backups, tap 3 discard 1 play Adjido, add back Diabolos/Titan(or Phoenix if we’re getting into Urianger territory) and Asura, then use the leftover CP to play Asura to get back 5 backups and cast the huge summon.

Star Sibyl, is actually the lifeblood of the deck. With reaching high backup counts being integral to the deck’s longterm health, a lot of the burden falls onto Star Sibyl and Moogle (XI) to get there. Sibyl gets Moogle which gets more backups. The other reason is because the deck has a serious lack of proactive odd costed backups. They’re all better when saved except for Sibyl. Tama is better for Dadaluma stuff, Shantotto well it’s Shantotto, Ajido once you know what summons you need and when you need them, and Masked Woman requires a dull forward. As such, if you want to accelerate your backup growth the burden falls entirely onto Sibyl. A lot of the game is bumming around on 2/3 backups, then having a turn with Sibyl that propels you to 5 backups while impacting the board. A good example is on 3 backups, using Sibyl to get Moogle, using Moogle to get Masked Woman and using her to remove a forward. High ceiling turns like that are what makes Sibyl strong, not to mention that she adds to the ceiling of any later turn with the action ability. (Ceiling just means how much it’s possible to do during a turn)

Minfilia, was nice. Maybe needs to be a 2 of to see her earlier, but she’s a contender for being cut from the deck. She does say gain 2 copies of Dadaluma, so I’m hesitant to cut her so early, but she did not feel very impactful all of the time. Hence, I want to try 2 copies of her out to see if she can help promote a more aggressive playstyle knowing I have the safety of her adding 2 cards back to hand effect to keep giving me gas. Also, I’m seeing a LOT of Nidhoggs.

Shantotto, fine at 1, liked her a bit better at 2. Until the space is worked out properly she’s fine at 1.

Tama, good like always, especially with all of these new fancy Earth forwards to summon like Vanille and Hugh Yurg.

Potential Edits

-1 Y’shtola, -1 Barbariccia, -1 While Mage, +1 Zidane, +1 Asura, +1 Archer.

It’s also possible to remove the Vanille and co entirely, but that’s a whole new blog if that happens.

Draft Stuff

Ice

Ice is under drafted in this set in most pods. It doesn’t have many forwards and it’s backups are all awkward. The strength of Ice currently is that nobody is picking Locke. Celes is a no-brainer she’s a 2CP potential 8,000 power forward, however, the Locke is a bit underwhelming as a sometimes 2CP 7,000 power forward. Due to this, Locke is under picked which makes him powerful. By having 4+ copies of Locke in your deck and a few Celes he should always be a 2CP 7,000 power forward which makes the card insane. The other issue is that the colour holds the 2nd most powerful summons in the set, so it’s a popular splash colour and it holds Kazusa which, due to the nature of draft, is playable in every deck. This means your summons are in medium contention and your most impactful backup is always in high contention. Kurasame, one of the better forwards is a Hero making him an unlikely pull and the reward for pulling ice legends isn’t very much. Outside of Locke and Celes, Shocktrooper and Snow are the only ice forwards below hero rarity and they both suck. Make no mistake, Shocktrooper is terrible because it cannot attack, there will always be crappy cards littering the field in a draft game so it’s useless and Snow has no other XIII cards in the set to help him.

Always pick

Kazusa

Hades

Celes

Doomtrain

Militesi Coeurl

Locke

The rest is all kinda bad other than the backups. 3CP summoner is exceptionally powerful, but without the summons people won’t be looking for her, the Ysayle is a more desirably pickup to most people, so take that when possible.

TL;DR 3CP Hecaton = heaven, 2CP Hecaton = hell. Locke + Celes are good draft picks

[scottynada]

Core Set 2021 Set Review - Green

Pick: 9+ Shortcut: D Even with sacrifice synergies and creature death synergies, Porticullis Vine doesn't end up doing enough to warrant a spot in most decks. If you have synergy and are lacking playables, you can play this and it won't be too miserable.

Pick: 9+ Shortcut: D Skyway Sniper is strictly for Flying dense decks, nothing more.

Pick: 2-4 Shortcut: B Drowsing Tyrannodon is really the surprise star of M21. There are so many ways to give this 4 power that some decks would want as many of these as possible at the two drop slot. I'd argue that overall this is Green's best common since it fits into the format's best curve outs and archetypes.

Pick: 1-2 Shortcut: B You will find the most synergies for Jolrael, Mwonvuli Recluse in Green/Blue, but even if you lack Blue, there are cards like Llanowar Visionary that will both get you cats and help you get to six mana with a decently sized hand. The cat token production is the main aspect of this card, but if you find yourself with a wide board and extra lands you don't need, this can threaten some massive attacks.

Pick: 4-6 Shortcut: C+ You want to avoid Quirion Dryad if you are heavy Green, but if you lean more towards any other color, this card on turn 2 can grow pretty rapidly throughout the game.

Pick: 1-2 Shortcut: B Scavenging Ooze is an all-star two drop. This will play a perfectly good role early to attack and block and even grow in size as you trade creatures naturally. Randoming hosing the reanimator decks is just a nice bonus.

Pick: 9+ Shortcut: D Two drops are at a premium in M21, but Snarespinner is probably the worse of them in Green. If you need two drops, this does still hold +1/+1 counters and blocks some things early. Obviously this gets bonus points versus a Blue/White Flying deck.

Pick: 3-5 Shortcut: C+ Wildwood Scourge will always be inefficient on the turn that you cast it. The ability it has to grow changes the card from terrible to actually quite strong. There are a decent number of ways to add counters in the set, and even giving this one additional counter can make this a very efficient card.

Pick: Turn 3 Karn Shortcut: F You will run out of lands in hand before Azusa, Lost but Seeking does anything. Constructed decks are built with ways to keep getting value of this creature in a way that draft decks just can't do.

Pick: 5-8 Shortcut: C There really aren't enough quality cats to make Felie Sovereign into a crazy bomb and on its own the card is just okay. You can still probably do a lot worse than this at the three drop slot and maybe you can pick off some enchantment based removal if you are lucky.

Pick: 7+ Shortcut: C- I'm not looking to pick Fierce Empath very highly since it doesn't block particularly well. If you need an extra playable and have 2+ targets for this, I think you could do a lot worse. Extra points if your high drops are nice Rares.

Pick: 1-3 Shortcut: B Garruk's Gorehorn trades poorly with a decent amount of creatures on its own, even on curve, but M21 has so many ways to augment creatures that it isn't hard to put the opponent in a tough spot with this. One Pridemalkin and you have an evasive card drawing engine.

Pick: 2-4 Shortcut: B Llanowar Visionary is a pushed three drop for a Common creature. It ramps, draws, even trades decently. The most surprising part about this is that it probably isn't even Green's best Common. That being said mostly any Green deck wants these and you should pick them up early.

Pick: 3-5 Shortcut: C+ Pridemalkin is an enabler for a lot of Green's strongest starts. Adding Trample to your large buffed creatures is no joke and enabling good attacks immediately when this enters the battlefield makes this cat a huge overperformer.

Pick: 3-5 Shortcut: C+ Sporeweb Weaver may be defensively stated, but all it takes is a single +1/+1 counter or Aura and this is also a really tough to block attacker. This won't break any games open for you, but in terms of utility and efficiency this is a very good three drop.

Pick: 3-5 Shortcut: C+ The only thing holding Thrashing Brontodon back is its prohibitive mana cost. Hitting two green sources on turn three isn't trivial, but everything else about this card makes up nicely for the risk you take. When this lands its stats will dominate the board early and picking off wayward Artifacts/Enchantments is a nice bonus.

Pick: 5-8 Shortcut: C Trufflesnout is perfectly fine filler in mostly any deck. A 3/3 body in this format is actually pretty decent and sometimes the lifegain can help you swing a race if you drop this later on. Don't expect this to help your lifegain synergy decks, but you can depend on this oinker for most of your other needs.

Pick: 4-6 Shortcut: C Burlfist Oak can get huge and attack extremely well, but it does need a little help. Giving this evasion goes a long way in avoiding enemy chump blocks. You do have to be concerned about how you build your deck since you can expect these to be poor blockers the turn they come down.

Pick: 9+ Shortcut: D Canopy Stalker is a fine card that suffers from M21's four drop creatures being so strong. I rarely want these, but if you are in the market for a card like this, try to augment it with something like Dub or +1/+1 counters and you'll really have a good time.

Pick: 9+ Shortcut: D The four drop slot in Core Set 2021 is competitive enough that Orney Dilophosaur is never something you need to pick very highly at all. If it ends up in your deck, it's not the end of the world. It blocks and attacks fairly well and wears a Dub quite well.

Pick: 6-8 Shortcut: C Sabertooth Mauler rewards aggression, but you can't have too many four drops in your aggressive decks. If you are far enough ahead to force your opponent to block every turn, this can get wildly out of hand while playing defense quite well at the same time. I'm never unhappy to have this in the deck, but for curve reasons you don't need to take this highly.

Pick: 1 Shortcut: A Up there with other strange Green creature names in M21 like Drowsing Tyranodillo and Orney Dilpodino.

Pick: 9+ Shortcut: D You generally won't be so desperate as to run Garruk's Gorehorn in your five drop slot. If you had a really rocky draft and you have some ways to give this evasion, this still does have power and toughness.

Pick: 7+ Shortcut: C-

Pick: 5-8 Shortcut: C There are a nice set of uncommon ramp payoffs in M21, but if you can't get your hands on any, Colossal Dreadmaw can get the job done. If you can ramp with Llanowar Visionary, it might be nice to have one or two of these as your top end to force your opponent to have an answer or die quickly.

Pick: 2-4 Shortcut: B When Warden of the Woods is cast, it usually will just dominate the battlefield. The only effective way to kill this is in combat, and most likely that will require a multi-block. If you can set up an awkward blocking situation, your combat tricks will be devastating. If you are on the other side of the battlefield, don't be afraid to let your opponent draw cards if it will give you a nice window to get in a lot of damage. If you aren't giving your opponent much time after you target this, they may not even have enough time to cast the cards that you give them.

Pick: The Lastest Mercy, I Guess Shortcut: F I've never seen this cast and can't even imagine a situation where I'd want these. There are so many better ways to gain life and Green isn't even the life gaining archetype.

Pick: 6-8 Shortcut: C Ranger's Guile does good work when you are facing down some of the more clunky removal in this set. There are creatures that you generally want to protect after adding +1/+1 counters or Auras. This isn't for every matchup, but you'll feel unbeatable if you ever 'counter' a five mana removal spell.

Pick: Should've Been in THB Shortcut: F You can sideboard Run Afoul versus a great density of aggressive Flyers. At least it is efficient enough to catch you up on board in a pinch. Just don't expect this to even kill the threats that you really need dead.

Pick: 9+ Shortcut: D Heroic Intervention not boosting power is a real shame since it means that setting up a favorable combat for you will be much more difficult. Yes, there will be large blowouts with this card where you will feel like this is extremely strong, but most of the time other combat tricks will just outshine this.

Pick: 1-3 Shortcut: B Primal Might can remove almost anything with enough mana and provide a lot of damage out of nowhere. The only awkward part is finding space to cast this when your opponent can't act in response. If you can maneuver yourself into a situation and catch your opponent tapped out of mana, this will reward you greatly.

Pick: 9+ Shortcut: D My opponent has to have a ton of good targets for me to consider using Return to Nature. This can also hit targets of Rise Again, but leaving open the mana and being reactive is just too situation for me to call good.

Pick: 7+ Shortcut: C- One of the primary uses for Setessan Training is to enable Drowsing Tyrannodon attacks.

Pick: 9+ Shortcut: D Titanic Growth is just a combat trick, but when cast it really changes the shape of blocks. Your small creatures will be able to overcome much more expensive threats and you can set up nice efficient trades if you manage to get ahead on board versus an opponent on the back foot. I'd happily play these if I had an aggressive curve.

Pick: 9+ Shortcut: D Track Down has a powerful effect in a format that is pretty hostile to two mana spells that do not affect the board. If you have to include this in your deck, it will never feel too bad, but it's still usually much better to include any other impactful creature.

Pick: 6+ Shortcut: C- Cultivate is an incredibly powerful card that enables incredibly lackluster decks. If you somehow have a nice Shrine packagae and also the early game interaction to survive, this card will be perfect for you. I just don't think those decks come together often enough to go for in a draft.

Pick: 5-8 Shortcut: C Not making Saproling tokens with Fungal Rebirth is pretty devasting in this format that is all about your board position. The card is quite strong if you can get the tokens, but it's unreliable enough where I'm not thrilled about this card overall. It's much better in a deck that can reliably trade off early since you have a lot more power over creatures dying when you block rather than when you attack.

Pick: 4-8 Shortcut: C I think the best part about Garruk's Uprising might the the Trample effect. Red/Green decks in this format can take a more controlling role with all the draw effects, but you do need to make sure you pick up the cheap interaction. If you find yourself in these colors, you probably want to take these in the middle of the pack. I wouldn't take these super early as speculation.

Pick: 3-5 Shortcut: C+ As far as combat tricks go, Invigorating Surge leaves a heavy impact on the board. The fact that the +1/+1 counter bonus stays even after combat makes this something that can trick your opponent and develop your board in a meaningful way. Even if you have no other +1/+1 counter synergies, this is a solid card for adding two counters. It can get really crazy if you have other effects to add even more counters.

Pick: 9+ Shortcut: D Sanctum of Fruitful Harvest can help you cast your other Shrines, but the strategy just requires so much of your draft to go right that I rarely think they are worth going for in any serious way.

Pick: 1 Shortcut: A Garruk, Unleashed isn't unbeatable by any means, but a threat that continues to produce 3/3s and can enable some massive attacks is quite good. You can't just throw this down on a board when you are behind, but if you land this on curve along with a normal early game you will probably end up way ahead.

Pick: 4-6 Shortcut: C+ Hunter's Edge is a very pushed card that is synergistic with the set. The only knock against it is that it can sometimes be awkward to cast this into your opponent's open mana. The best scenario for this is if you can pressure your opponent to tap out to keep up with your board, giving you a chance to cast this and really swing the board in your favor.

[say-no-to-this-rp]

Friday, 12th of May, 2023 - Late Afternoon

Residence of Andromeda Tonks in Lawrence Hill, Bristol, UK Teddy may live in a London flat, but home will always be a brick-faced cottage in suburban Bristol. He's has always held fast to the belief that not a single thing in his life can't be made better by ambling down Memory Lane (no, really– that's the name of the street), surrounded on either side by sweet-smelling wisteria trees, their branches full with heavy amethyst blooms, and coming up to the front drive of his childhood home.

Gran's house is a brown, brick-faced cottage with creamy shutters; picturesque in an whimsical, English Cottage Garden sort of way. The yard is framed by an old picket fence, which is being held up by a precarious combination of dumb luck and sheer willpower (and possibly a touch of a fastening charm, but if Teddy were to say as much his Gran would only deny it). The front gate drags into the ground, and you have to lift it just so if you want to open it enough to actually fit through. Teddy's offered to fix it about half a million times, but each time his Gran rejects the offer with a wave and an offhand comment about how a broken gate somehow gives the place character. One of these days, he's going to fix it behind her back, and play dumb when she points a finger. Who, me? His Gran won't buy it for a second, but hey, at least he would have to hop the fence each time he comes through.

The path from the gate is made of flagstones, spaced in an eclectic, winding trail that circles the yard before leading to the front porch. Each stone is worn smooth from years of hopping from one to the other as a child, pretending the mulch was molten lava. Following the pathway means getting a full tour of the garden, which is positively bursting in with hollyhock, foxglove, roses, and peonies. There's a long-limbed tree in the middle of the yard, its branches just within reach of his childhood bedroom (he knows from experience), with a knotted face in the trunk that Teddy has always thought looked like a laughing woman. The nostalgia of retracing this familiar path is unbeatable, no matter how many times he follows the familiar circle to the front door. After all, Teddy grew up in this garden. According to his Gran, so did his Mom. Teddy lets himself into the front door with the spare key under the statue of a friendly garden gnome pushing a wheelbarrow, and sets it on a table in the entrance room. He can already pick up on the smell of curry permeating the air, laid over the ever-present aroma of lavender and sage that saturates every memory Teddy has of his grandmother. "Gran?" he calls out, as he hangs his coat on one of the brass knobs by the door. A moment later, the crisp, crystalline voice of his Gran answers back: "Kitchen!" He passes through the sitting room, which he's always thought had a suspiciously misleading named given that no one is actually allowed to sit there except on Christmas, and shoulders through the swinging door to the kitchen. Sure enough, his Gran is at the stove, sleeves rolled past her elbow, apron covered in flour. She's folding butter into raw dough, but pauses to smile at him over her shoulder. "You're late," she chides, but there's no heat to the words, only affection. "Hello to you too," Teddy says with a grin, giving her a kiss on the cheek on his way to the sink. "What's the Flaky Pastry for?" "Not for you," his Gran tells him, giving him a pointed look, "I'm going to a dinner party tomorrow, and thought I'd make palmiers. You're helping." "Oh, am I?" Teddy says with a good-natured roll of his eyes, before soaping up his hands. "Sass isn't cute, young man," his Gran tells him, repeating one of her many age-old wisdoms. Or at least, what pass as wisdoms, in the Tonks household. Sometimes the line between a wisdom and a pet peeve is somewhat blurry, when it comes to Andromeda Tonks. "Who's sassing? I was just making a simple observation." His Gran makes a small noise that might have passed as a snort if she weren't too much of a lady for it. "Who raised you to be such a menace?" "Hmm..." Teddy pretends to wonder, rinsing his hands and shutting off the water with his elbow, "I think it might have been my menacing grandmother?" The pair of them spend the next hour alternating between grating, chopping, simmering, and stirring the coconut curry they'll be having for dinner, and twisting garlic, rosemary, and red pepper flakes into swirl-shaped flaky pastries for his Gran's party the next day. They pass the time chatting about the last two weeks, catching each other up on everything that's happened since their last Bi-Monthly Get Together. Teddy tells his Gran about Dom's latest scrapbooking prank with the hot pink faux fur, and his Gran tells him about a new recipe she's found and will be wanting to try the next time they get together; he talks about his job hunt finally turning up a teaching position at Hogwarts, and she talks about the certain someone from her Book Club she's started seeing. It isn't until they're sitting down to eat, and Teddy finally brings up the wedding planning, that his Gran's mouth pulls into a frown, and she falls uncharacteristically silence. Teddy sighs. He thought she'd be over this by now; goodness knows they'd already put each other through the ringer for it. "I thought you liked Victoire." "Don't be daft. It's not about her and you know it," his Gran tells him with another sigh. Almost to herself, she adds, "It's like you hear me but don't listen." "I listen," Teddy says, with the indigence of a frustrated child, chasing a chunk of an onion around his plate. "Then stop pretending you don't," his Gran snaps. She sighs with frustration, setting her fork down against her plate. "I don't want to argue during dinner." "I don't see why we have to fight about this at all," Teddy says heatedly, "I can't just pretend I'm not getting married, Gran. I am marrying Victoire." "And less than a year ago, you were leaving Victoire," his Gran says, punctuating it with a look that all but dares him to disagree. "Victoire is a brilliant young woman with a bright future ahead of her. And you are a brilliant young man with a bright future ahead of you. But I don't see the same bright future for the pair of you." "I know all this, Gran, because we talked about this. And we agreed to disagree about this. I shouldn't have to walk on eggshells around the woman who raised me, because she doesn't like that I'm getting married to my high school sweetheart." His grandmother sighs, turning away from him suddenly and staring at a vase of peonies set out by the window. The seconds tick by, and Teddy watches them go one by one on the clock above the door, knowing better than to draw her from her thoughts prematurely. After a while she dips her head, like a nod to herself, and meets his eyes, pinning him in place with sharp eyes the exact same color as his own. Teddy braces himself for another argument, but gets none. Instead, his grandmother does the unexpected: "You're right. I am happy for you... I want you to be able to tell me about the wedding." An olive branch if he ever saw one. Teddy grins. "Well, we finally picked the venue out the other day...?" Dinner runs without any further hiccups, but when Teddy leaves for home that night, there's a buzzing in the back of his head he can't seem to suppress no matter how hard he tries. He can't quite put a finger on what it could be no matter how hard he tries... and by the time morning comes, the buzzing has all but slipped away, forgotten.

Monday, 7th of August, 2023 Early Morning Residence of Teddy Lupin and Victoire Weasley in Westminster, London, UK Teddy sits with his cup of coffee at the kitchen table, pretending to skim this morning's edition of the Daily Prophet while Victoire hogs the bathroom for forty-five minutes. What she does in there is a total mystery to him. What he does know is every morning she steals away into it like a thief in the night, and he spends an hour waiting impatiently to be allowed to pee in his own house. Another ten minutes go by before Victoire comes into the kitchen, looking like one of Witch Weekly's centerfolds and smelling like the same perfume she's worn since she was sixteen (if prompted, Teddy could also tell you it's called Passion Potion, costs five-hundred sickles for a bottle the size of his thumb, and is actually mixed with a few drops of Amortentia to appeal to anyone who happens to pass within whiffing distance). She sinks into the seat next to him without a word, holding out an expectant hand, which he dutifully places the business section of the paper into. As Victoire reads, she twirls her wand over her shoulder, where the kitchen is; Teddy watches her favorite mug slide itself out of the cabinet and place itself onto the Keurig, which resets itself with a new cup before starting all on its own. Teddy was raised to put a little elbow grease into everything he does, and feels it has kept him humble and given him a basic understand of how and why things work; Victoire, on the other hand, is the sort of woman who will streamline anything and everything, and when something comes up, not only does she know a spell for it but she has mastered said spell beautifully. A difference they love and hate about each other. Their relationship is almost characterized by love-hate, come to think of it. With a small smirk to himself, Teddy thinks, 'Love keeps us going, hate makes the sex good.' He does not say this aloud. Mostly because Victoire wouldn't think it was funny. "Today's the cake appointment, yeah?" he says instead, and Victoire turns the page of the paper before glancing up at him with those gorgeous blue eyes of hers. "Is that today?" Teddy raises an eyebrow at her. "At four. Don't tell me you forgot." "That's what Assistants are for, yes?" she answers with a shrug, leaning back to accio her coffee. She drinks it black. Teddy admittedly has to fight the frown very hard, but he does win out in the end. Assistants have, historically speaking, been satisfying a lot more than Victoire's schedule. Or, more accurately, one Assistant had been. But he was supposed to have forgiven her for that... And besides, this is a different Assistant, a new hire named– he thinks it might be Opal? "Not excited about cake?" Victoire shrugs again, before turning back to her paper. "I'm supposed to be watching my figure, Teddy." "Your figure is gorgeous," he points out, but Victoire's answering look lets him know that he's missing the point again. Cheerfully, he thinks, 'Well I'm excited enough for both of us.' "I have a meeting at two, but it should be done well before then. I'll be there." The rest of the morning passes quietly, lasting only for as long as it takes Victoire to finish her coffee. It's not an uncomfortable silence, though Teddy has always been the sort of man to prefer conversation to quiet, but something about it unnerves him. So much so that he's completely unable to read a single sentence of the paper, and is almost relieved when she folds her section of the paper onto the table. Victoire leans in to kiss Teddy's cheek, as she does ever morning before she heads out, and says, "I will see you after work." "I'll see you at the cake shop," he says with a grin. Victoire only half-smiles (the smile she gives him when she doesn't think he's as cute as he thinks he is, but is trying placate him) and shakes her head: "That's the same thing, Teddy." Almost as soon as the door has closed behind her, Teddy is on his feet. He stretches, moves across the room to the kick on the radio, and blasts Top 40 Hits while he gets ready for the day.

Late Afternoon Brew Crew Coffee Bar in Mayfair, London, UK Teddy and Dom are sitting across form each other at Brew Crew Coffee Bar, which would normally be a totally average, fun thing for them, if Teddy wasn't glancing at his watch every few minutes and wondering aloud why Victoire wasn't here yet. The three of them had agreed to meet at the coffee shop at 16:15, because the appointment was at 16:30 and the shop is close enough that they'd have enough time to order some drinks and walk over. Only 16:15 came and went, and Dominique showed and Victoire didn't. Teddy's called Victoire's office, and gotten the plummy voice of her new Assistant, telling him I'm sorry but she's unavailable, Mr Lupin and she's in a meeting, Mr Lupin and would you like to leave a message, Mr Lupin? Which good on her for not taking his shit, but also, Victoire isn't supposed to be in a meeting she's supposed to be here. He glances at his watch and reads 16:46. And sighs. 'Victoire's job is her priority,' Teddy thinks, 'You know this about her. You like this about her. It's not personal, this is just how she is.' "Should we go in without–?" he starts to say, but isn't even able to finish the thought before the phone in his back pocket starts ringing. He gives Dom a knowing look, which says guess who that could be, before he reaches to answer it: "Speak of the devil." "Hello, Mr Lupin?" Teddy pulls the phone back to stare at it in disbelief, as if that will somehow convey his feelings across the line. It's not even Victoire, it's her Assistant. Is this what it feels like to be punked? Is that what's going on here? "Mr Lupin?" "Hey, yeah, sorry. Vic leave her phone at the office on her way out?" Teddy asks, hitting the speaker button and holding it between him and Dominique, so she could hear the conversation. Teddy knows, logically, that Victoire hasn't actually left yet. He knows she isn't going to leave. If Victoire had intended to be here, she'd have been here thirty minutes ago. On time. "Ms Weasley wanted me to inform you she won't be able to make it. She's in an important meeting which has unfortunately run over, and simply can't get away," the Assistant says, voice crisp and carefully neutral. Teddy nods along, even though she clearly can't actually see him through the phone line. "Yeah, alright," he says, already resigning himself to his fate, "Did she say if she wanted us to go on without her, or did she need us to reschedule?" Another small hesitation. "She didn't actually say one way or the other... Would you like me to ask for you, Mr Lupin?" "No, it's fine, don't bother her if she's in a meeting. If she asks later, tell her I said I'd figure it out," Teddy says, "Hey, and thanks for letting me know." "Of course. Have a lovely rest of your day, Mr Lupin." The line disconnects, and Teddy stares at the phone as if it were a crystal ball that had failed to answer any of his questions. This isn't the first time Victoire has skipped out on wedding planning. This isn't even the firs time this week she's skipped out on it. 'This isn't personal. She's not skipping out, you asshole, she just can't make it,' Teddy reminds himself. Victoire's busy. She works hard, she has a hard job, it makes sense she'd get caught up in it sometimes. This doesn't mean their wedding isn't important, or that she doesn't care. It is, and she does. Today just wasn't meant to be. "Welp," he says finally, fully prepared to make the best of this, and looking over at his fiancé's little sister (and to be quite honest, one of his best friends) with a playful smirk, "Guess it's just you and me again, Dom."