#sometimes having a filter is good
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As a rule, I try not to post anything online that I wouldn't shout in a crowded cafeteria
#thats how yall keep embarassing yourselves you dont exercise the same mental restraint online that you do irl with what you say#sometimes having a filter is good#im also still working on this as addiction left me mentally stunted in some areas for many years. social interaction being one of them#text
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People sorting ao3 solely by stats and only clicking on fics with a certain amount of kudos or comments, you will not survive the winter, nor the summer, nor at all, *brings out knife,* run
#ao3#fanfiction#because if everyone thinks like that then so many fics that might be great get buried and fall into the void#someone has to read it with no hits or kudos#not to mention sometimes people just have wildly different tastes so you don't know unless you look at it yourself#i put a bunch of exclusion filters and then go by summary and tags and open all the ones that sound interesting to me#if they're bad well easy enough to move on#but lotta good ones hidden in there with not a comment in sight and i must change that#knife tw#?#tw knife mention
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outer wilds is 40% off on steam - if you've not played it yet, i really really recommend it! to not spoil much - it's a super rewarding, immersive game about discovery, so, the less you know going in, the better! i played it this summer totally blind and i'm still thinking about it. a lot.
it won't be for everyone (no game is), but it's really wonderful if it clicks with you! so i urge you to at least give it a shot. the last time i loved a game so much i became a walking ad for it was for hollow knight - presumably a whole lot of my followers have played & love that game, so i just wanted to say : i consider outer wilds to be just as amazing of a game! i've even been purposefully avoiding reblogging spoilery fanart as to not rob any of you of the blind experience, just in case! that's how much i love it!!!
this has been your "guy who just played outer wilds" psa & little ramble about the game. thanks for reading
#i played it after my gf said play it its so good no icant tell you anything about it#and i was like oh sure#and i understand now . why they say that. theres a reason they say that.#if you have any questions about this game feel free to ask and i will try to answer them without spoiling anything!#txt#outer wilds#steam sale#please filter the outer wilds and outer wilds spoilers tags if you intend to play this sometime! i will be rbing stuff every so often!
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Jason Todd's timeline and "Age"
So, there's a lot of discussion of Jason Todd's age esp as relative to other sidekick vigilantes, particularly Tim and Mia. I believe the exact words are usually something about a "grown ass man beating up/trying to kill teenagers."
DISCLAIMER: This particular post is specifically regarding the "grown ass man vs teenagers" statement, I have posts regarding the "tried to kill them" portion and other stuff like "seriously Jason Todd is like being shot by a marshmallow gun compared to what goes on directly before and after him in these incidents, also you don't bitch about the right stuff, also a lot of you prop up characters who are Objectively Worse, and no that's not hate on your fave it's just me calling out hypocrisy". It just takes time to find digital copies of the panels I'm using. NOTE I AM NOT JUSTIFYING HIS ACTIONS. I'm just saying y'all blow it out of proportion for petty character hate. Like, shit, they're superheroes. Jason's soooo fuckin' tame. He's not even framed as a big deal to the teens it's only the adults that think it's that much of a problem.
Courtesy readmore post cut:
Now, to start off, we all know Jason died at 15 & a few months off from 16 (if you want me to dig up panels, sure, but I figured at this point that wasn't in question). Tim at this point is somewhere between 12-13, and we have this panel in Lonely Place of Dying which takes place a few months later:
So that's a ballpark of 2-3 years between Jason and Tim.
But Tim's age is really fucky and they keep de-aging him tbh. We can extrapolate that his confrontation with Jason was between the ages of 16-17 bcs it's after the arc where he has his incredibly shitty 16th birthday in Robin Vol2 #116 and before Red Robin where he's stated to be 17. This would put Jason between 18-19 at the time. (If you really want me to find panel sources for Tim's birthday and his age in RR then, sure, but I don't think they're necessary. I used it more as a guidepost for Jason's age, since we have a clear idea of what the age gap is.)
At least, on paper.
Mia for her part I've had a hard time finding like, on panel mentions of her age and if anyone can direct me to it being explicitly stated I'd love that. I'm rereading old comics but it's a LOT of comics to hunt down & dig through. To my understanding she was fifteen when Ollie first met her, and there's at Minimum of about a year and a half between that to her meeting Red Hood, more likely at least two? because there's at least few months between that and her joining the Titans, the Doctor Light stuff, then One Year Later, and then returned to Star some 3 months after Ollie came back to run for mayor? And then Jason not too long after. So, two years feels safe. Puts her at 17-ish, Jason at 19-20
Once again, I specify: on paper.
People would happily point out at this point that the upward stretch of a 4 year age gap is a "huge gap in maturity." And yeah, under normal circumstances, I'd agree.
But, and this is going to get contradictory bcs I found Two different timelines (BOTH written by Winick, lmao), and depending on how you read it it could be up to three different possibilities. Let's Start with Batman Annual #25: Daedalus & Icarus.
Timestamp before Jason's resurrection, which is pretty well known at this point:
Next, him waking up from a coma afterwards, when he escapes the hospital:
Now the above could be interpreted as either 1 year after he died if we're assuming that it's using the same "start" point to count as the resurrection (unlikely), or one year after he came back (more likely).
Next, the timestamp right before a guy recognizes him and sells him out:
And, finally, the timestamp before being put in the Pit:
That is, count it up, between 3-3 1/2 years where Jason was dead, in a coma, or otherwise not particularly... cognizant of the world around him. His ass is NOT developing emotionally, socially, or mentally like this, which pretty handily bridges the gaps there. Taken at face value, Jason's maturity level is going to be, unironically, younger than Tim's in the wake of these setbacks.
Now, if we go to Lost Days issue 1, it doesn't specify how long he was dead, nor how long he was in a coma, so we'll just carry those two over, what we DO have is this from just after Talia brought him home:
This puts him as being on the streets for five months, so we're at just shy of two years so far. And then we have this:
Which is right before Talia puts him in the Pit.
So, in summary: 6 months dead, 1 year coma, 5 months on the street, and something like 1-1 1/2 years with the League which...
Actually puts us on almost the exact same timeframe either way. 3 to 3 1/2 years. It just changes whether Jason was on the streets or with the League for longer.
And is utterly incomprehensible because comic timelines are a freaking nightmare.
If we're being generous, then that would put Jason at a minimum of 19, maybe toeing the line of 20 for UTRH, again, on paper, because like hell are you convincing me he did less than a year's worth of training abroad throughout Lost Days. Yeah maybe they trained him in fighting while he was catatonic, muscle memory and all that. But the other teachers that we KNOW of? The bombs, guns, probably something to get him up to date on handling all that tech we see him using, Egon, potentially arguably All-Caste if you want to draw from n52...
but you'd have to knock at least a year and a half off of his internal/personal development from death & coma, at minimum. Maybe you could argue he was somewhat developing while in his "the lights are on, but nobody's home" phase, you can't say it's at the same level as a normal person might when going about their day to day life, and it's difficult to measure. But he's not hitting the kind of milestones that he should be for his age. I wouldn't put him at anything less than two years behind. So if we use our upper estimates on Jason, and lower estimates on both the developmental setbacks and Tim/Mia's ages that gives us:
Jason toeing 20, mentally 18, fighting Tim at 16. 2 year gap, kind of stretching the physical age gap if we assume Tim had just barely turned 13 when he showed up to be Robin. - OR LESS
Jason maybe 21, mentally 19, fighting Mia at 17, two year age gap again. Honestly, still not that big of a difference - OR LESS
And, to be frank, that's not even counting the mental development issues that come from the intense physical trauma from dying - and I swear to fuck don't give me the "He's not the only one who died he's not special" speech.
HOW MANY OF THE OTHERS YOU'RE USING AS A GOTCHA LOST, *GESTURING AGGRESSIVELY ABOVE*, LITERALLY MULTIPLE YEARS OF THEIR LIFE.
Not counting adults, of course. Barry lost years, Hal lost years, Ollie I think also lost a couple years? but A) they came back still adults, bodies pretty much the same. B) While Jason's body didn't go through a magic growth spurt in canon, it did still grow esp while with the League.
I'll eventually get around to Titan's Tower & GA#72 (tbh, there are other people who've already done Titan's Tower and it'd probably be better than what I do, so I'm more going to focus on the latter, but there IS a specific part of the former that drives me nuts that I don't see brought up a lot), and maybe if we're feeling spicy all my issues with UTRH starting with how Winick is just as guilty of retroactively writing Jason as being inherently a bad penny since his Robin days as any of the other "modern" writers. Like, bud, Severe enough Head Trauma is legitimately enough to change someone's personality, not to mention trauma. It wouldn't hurt your narrative for that eerie difference, the Shade of What Once Was if you're really going for RH being Like that.
Final addition: I swear to god if you use my post to start up some kind of petty-ass ship war or flame other characters I will immediately turn off reblogs and replies I am Not Dealing With That Shit, please and thank you.
Anyways, @glitter-stained, your interest made me decide to actually put the work in now to pull it up rather than passively gather stuff to dump whenever discourse pushes me over the edge so, here ya are. Looks like you did have it closer on the mark than I did.
#dc#Jason Todd#I guess#because frankly I'm sick of this. Learn to use content filters and grow up.#Typically I try to practice what I preach and I'm very liberal with filters and blocking ppl. But Sometimes Temptation Seizes Me#Note that I'm trying to be rather Watsonian with my technicalities but I've got the Doylist angles in my head too.#Stop using a character as a gotcha to shame people you're not endearing anyone#Mia is a genuinely really good character and trying to sell her as a better alternative while bashing the characters ppl do like#does not fucking work you idiots.#Have you never worked in sales? it's Sooooo easy to spin#“Hey do you like this character for x & y & z? I have another GREAT character you'd love and has the benefit of ALSO being Q.”#positive reinforcement is always a more effective recruitment tactic than haterism#I'm already regretting this#I decided not to tag the other two bcs at this point I expect any tagged post to get messy and adding them is just inviting it to be worse
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home? he’s next to you, right next to you…
#zoomed out blurry shots…. we’re so back !!#theyre working on their communication but sometimes you don’t need words to say come here i missed you :’)#this is as good as i got right now jdhdkdd#filters are broken and i wasn’t messing w expressions i still have msq to finish !!!#but them 🥺#ffxiv#oc: emile jenidaut#estinien varlineau#emile/estinien
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Look. Look. I still like Batfam. I think it’s fun and interesting and I like fandoms where the fans are actively engaging with each other…. I also think they need their own goddamn tag and needs to stop intruding into the rest of DC and even just straight up comics Batfam. Fanon Batfam just needs to be rebranded and be its own thing because if it is not its own thing, then I suffer trying to find literally anything DC that is not Batfam-centric. Y’all are fucking insufferable and need to keep your echo chamber contained.
Let me read fanfics based on the canon characterizations.
#personal#dc#anti batfam#thank god for the JLI#they’ve been spared for the most part from batfam fanon#i literally just filtered out the past four years of Batfam fanfics#and I just read stuff from before because it’s unlikely to be tainted by WFA#sometimes I also filter out YJ because I also blame it for fanon#I LIKE GOOD DAD BATMAN OKAY#THE PROBLEM IS THAT GOOD DAD BATMAN IS WHO HE SHOULD BE BUT NOT WHO HE IS#like the ideal Batman is hope idealized in the dark#a spotlight in a polluted night sky#that’s BATMAN#he should be able to hold a child’s hand and be kind#but instead the comics give us this fuckass sigma male#annoying that the cartoons capture Batman better than his comics#but it’s also the cartoons that influence fanon most right after WFA#Target demographics and all that jazz#BRUCE WAYNE SHOULD BE A GOOD DAD#BUT I CANT HAVE GOOD DAD BRUCE AND ALSO EMOTIONALLY COMPLICATED EVERYONE ELSE#I want to get into literally all of the other big DC families#been meaning to check out super fam once I consume all Booster Gold content
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i used to freehand comics all the time as a child and since the part i liked was the drawing part i would just draw panel after panel because i didn't want to stop drawing to think about icky icky words, plus the story TOTALLY still made perfect sense! to me! and noone else, but 'whoooo caaaaares omgggg its not like comics and sequantial art are a communicative meeediummmm lmaoooooo'. i spent my entire childhood telling myself stuff like "oh pfft I know this story by heart- ill SIMPLY remember the dialogue and write it later" ...and. I can't help but admire baby maiora's (call that a minora ba tm tsk) fucking audacity? hubris? confident wrongness? kid couldn't even remember to finish the comics in the first place? INCREDIBLE levels of unearned self assurance, wish that were me, genuinely- what an icon!!! anyway i think i have forever cursed myself
#maiora garrulates#the maiora overthinks the process of writing dialogue saga continues!!!!!!!#im so tired. i have been overthinking this shit in circles i have not been making any progress in any which way lmao!#im bitching and moaning for funsies this is not that serious in the Grand Scheme Of Things i just wanna improve at my fav thing#and ❤️ Unfortunately ❤️ my favorite thing in the world involves learning MY MOST HATED *NEMESIS*!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! verbal communication. ew#words are fun! i LOVE words! toys!!!!! im using words right now and i didn't combust!!!!! wow look at that!!!!!!!!!!!!!#putting words in SEQUENCE? multiple times?? filtering THOUGHTS into SENTENCES???? sentences that a character would or wouldn't SAY???#AND THEN THERE'S ANOTHER CHARACTER SOMETIMES???? AND THAT BITCH ALSO HAS THOUGHTS AND FEELINGS????? AND THEY ALL HAVE PERSONAL IDIOLECTS#AND TONES THAT S U P P O S E D L Y ARE IMPLICATED BY MANNERISMS AND VERBAL HABITS AND CIRCUMSTANCES (AND THERE'S WRONG ANSWERS! ALSO!!)#AND THEY'RE IN A CONTEXT!! AND THEY'RE INTERACTING WITH EACH OTHER AND INFLUENCING EACH OTHER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#THE CONVERSATION COULD VARY GIVEN ENERGY LEVELS WHETER OR NOT SOMEONE'S FOOT IS FALLING ASLEEP THE F U C K I N G WEATHER#“oh dialogue is easy just say it out loud to yourself until it 'sounds normal' ^^”#screaming crying throwing up NONE OF THIS IS INTUITIVE TO MEEEEEEEEEEEeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee....!#ok dramatics over its out of my system! for now!!!#this is all easily explained bc i just. draw a lot more than i talk to people. so like. OBVIOUSLY i have more practice drawing#so drawing comes natural! talking does not! subsequently dialogue is Hard! No FUCKING Shit Sherlock!!!!! (affectionate)#so yeah. im using y'all (the tumblr void) as practice! hi!!! words at you!!!!!!!!!!#so yeah thanks for baring with me while passing by my corner of the internet#i do love self indulgence this is fun check out my navel gazing actually no do not look at my belly button#anyway i just think this is mildly interesting. some of my writer buds have the same “not good enough” allergy towards visuals#but they use it to be mean2me >:( same bitch that “omg i cant i suck at drawing i can't do this-” does the “uhm. just write? lol.” 2 meeee#we could have peace and love on planet earth and a common experience and yet you KICK miette for being bad at words!!!1!!! </3 heartbreak!!#what the fuck was i talking about even#oh yeah. perfectionism within creatives i guess. LMAO JK i am talking about NOTHIN!!!!G i am just putting Words Out Here ehehehehehe#its practice >;)c#all this bc ive been doodling comics for myself again and im V!! PROUD OF THE ART!!!! wanna share- but DIALOGUE!*⚡sfx!!*....... so! options#a) leaving it blank. no there are NO microphones in the budget. b) leaving blank *balloons* so that the Rythm is there. implied convo!!!#c) ...doing it badly. (tragic)(heartwrenching)(teeny tiny bruise 2 the ego) *dramatic single tear cleches fists * its the only way.........#...we shall see! literally none of this is all that serious i am procrastinating!! <3 playing with my tuoys!!!!!!!! silly time!!!#/all lh! am reaching 30 tags so that is all for THIS episode of the maiora bitches about dialogue saga thank you for joining me!!okilyBuhBY
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Oh cool you're a gamer? Normally I'd claim such a chill and nebulous label for myself, but thanks to a helpful anon I now know instead that the proper term is "piece of shit"
#I always forget the dissonance that comes into play when re-entering a fandom space#It's wild to receive an anonymous hate-ask based on one (1) post from someone I know hasn't engaged with my page before#I'm going to keep this to the tags for the sake of saving space but gd y'all#we have tag filtering for a reason#and I try to be pretty damn good with my tags#if it is inconceivable to you#that I can both love Solas as a character#and also hate actual real life genocide#or that I can have a full list of (very valid btw) critiques of Veilguard#but still harbor love for the franchise (and even parts of Veilguard itself)#then idfk what to tell you?#I'm sorry people are shitty on the internet and I'm sorry I harbor opinions that you hate#but unfortunately I am capable of nuance#I like Solas#I like Sera and Vivienne despite the fact that they sometimes argue with solas because#it#is#a#game#and all that matters to me is compelling narrative for me to lose hours of my life in#I am disappointed by the writing/planning/execution of Veilguard#but I also enjoy the characters in it to the extent of what we've been given and have shared multiple posts communicating exactly that#you think the dwarves and Qunari deserve better?#i could not agree more my guy#i am all ears and angry typing fingers for the subject over here on my little slice on the internet#the people out here (I'm talking about an extreme sect of fans here so if you feel called out I suggest examining why)#(because for the most part I don't mean you and you shouldn't feel guilty)#who are creating this binary of “all positive” or “all negative” are absolutely wild for that#I can like and dislike this game#and I wish this anon luck in better curating what they'd like their feed to be
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Me, an unfortunate amount of times over the years: telling my partner that they remind me of this actor who i have a longstanding crush on is not only totally normal, but also a great compliment and they will see it as such!!!
Also me: would drop EVERYTHING im doing to fuck ann dowd, oliver platt, or donald sutherland
#RIP 😭😭😭😭😭😭#DS probably IS considered objectively handsome but i forgot most people my age only think of him as an old guy#anyway THEN i stupidly explain all the reasons why they--the actor--are attractive to me#which generally makes it worse#I'm basically middle aged and still haven't learned that i can love somebody so much but they'll never think like me#WHICH IS GOOD IT IS GREAT WHEW THANK GOD#but having NO filter is sometimes not
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I get that the abscourse is a silly and lighthearted thing and I do hope yall enjoy your fun, but ngl seeing a bunch of people say things like like "keefe is too much of a WEAK PATHETIC LOSER to have abs :)" doesn't feel fantastic
#just. idk working out feels good + often helps with mental health and dysphoria#but at the same time it's really hard not to let myself fall into unhealthy thinking patterns#regarding muscles and body image and stuff#and it's something i struggle with sometimes and this doesn't exactly help#not saying i think you should stop the abscourse or anything. i've filtered the tag now so go forth and have fun#just wanted to vent idk#should i tw anything? i feel like i should tw something but i don't know what#abscourse
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Dear fucking God
So I've been dreaming more about my most recent ex lately (likely bc we started dating around this time last year), which is frustrating me Immensely. So I decided, Fuck it, I'd try to join a dating app after all. At least to try see.
Tried looking into what app to use, and it seems like it's an entire goddamn cesspool of bots and disgustingly expensive subscription services. Nothing is rated well. What's rated better is reviewed elsewhere to just be full of hot air. Tinder seems to be mostly for hookups, not interested. Her sounds nice for some, but I'd be uncomfortable there as a nonbinary person. Hinge and Bumble seem to be viewed generally badly too. And it all leads back to OkCupid, which sounds nice In Theory with the selection options, but a lot of people are saying it's gone to the fuckin dumps. But it seems like *everything* is a fucking cesspool, so if something is even a Little bit useful, then maybe it's still worth a try.
So I said fuck it. Let's try OkCupid. Downloaded, started trying to sign up.... and then I get an error message saying it can't create the account????
Like ok. Fuck me I guess. This was a stupid idea anyways.
#speculation nation#negative/#i could also wander back onto Lex i guess but i want. specifically. something that allows for more selection.#i want to be able to filter by people who are interested in the same kind of relationship that i am#which Matters now that ive officially decided i do want to raise kids.#i dont want to waste my time with people who arent interested in that anymore.#but it's hard to just bring that up in conversation. so a selection process is nice.#but just... ugh. i hate all of this. and i hate that i cant just go out and meet people bc i have stupid anxiety about talking to strangers.#it just makes me uncomfortable. online is easier. and fuck dude i know a romantic relationship isnt the end all be all#and believe me id love it if i didnt feel so pressured to Be in one.#what id love is a domestic partnership thats not necessarily romantic. but does have the possibility of sex.#bc screw me i. well. lmao i do have an interest in that.#it's just the amatonormative bullshit of romance being the end all be all. them being my Everything. etc etc etc#i want someone who i enjoy being around who will make me feel good and would potentially be open to raising kids with me#but also wouldnt mind the fact that my brain doesnt fucking Do romance like normal people. it just doesn't.#if it werent for the fact that im pretty sure ive had actual romantic feelings at least 2 times in my life. id think i was just aro.#grey aro for sure. this shit is barely there. but sometimes...... so so rarely tho. not really worth the trouble.#but i DO want someone around to make my life easier and to give me attention and make me feel special. you know???#just so frustrating. all of this is frustrating. Ugh.
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Hello! I love your crocodad au! I wanted to ask how do you plan stuff out for comics? Cause you have arcs figured out and whenever I try to plan it ends up as 3 ideas in a hat
this au started as 3 ideas in hat! at first i kind of wrote everything that i came up with, funny stuff and a few specific key moments without much of anything around. then i kind of pad around it, trying to figure out how to get these few moments.
started the au with the just the concept of croc raising luffy and what that could entail to, then thought of robin being there and the betrayal. everything went from there afterwards.
comics are great because you can make them somewhat episodic, im not good at telling 100% linear story, it's much easier to start with something episodic where each comics can be their own thing then slowly brings everything together. put some foreshadowing here, bring back this detail there. that's why the prologue isn't drawn in chronological order. 1) because i hadn't planned the whole thing at first, could draw in whatever order i felt like while i came up with the narrative. 2) because it's more fun to draw the funny part first, the shorter comics and really just putting the general idea of what the setting is like so i can work of that.
for example i decided without thinking that luffy got shot so he could keep a scar next to his eye, but different from the canon one so ppl could tell au and canon luffy apart. then i realized how much that event could influence the rest of story and characters, the themes and all.
what im saying is a few things started without too much thoughts behind them, put them there for fun or for convenience then went back to see how it could impact the story and characters and developed on that. there's a lot of ideas i ended up scratching because it didn't work, weren't actually that interesting or fun to me.
i've got a text file on my laptop and phone where i write anything that comes to mind, never delete any of the abandoned idea because i can always come back to them and take what was really interesting about them, reshape them entirely into something that works better. the notes can be a single sentence that will make no sense in a few weeks or a detailed plan of what a comic or event could be like, detailing each characters feelings and the setting it takes place in.
whenever i get hyped about something that won't happen until forever i go draw it, that way i won't forget about it and everytime i'll look at it i'll get all hyped again to keep working till we get there.
my process is kind of "write shit for kicks and giggles then go back and make it make sense."
#crocau ask#i dont start by thinking 'what are the themes i want to explore' but more 'wouldnt that be fun/angsty?' and themes shows up by themselves#there's recurring themes in the au i have with most of my stories. there's some parts that are vent. sometimes a bit straightforwardly othe#time the reflection of a reflection with a filter added on. the most important thing is to have fun cause if i spend sm time on smth#im bored of/dont like then whats the point! if i pressure myself into doing smth that Has to be good i'll just block myself from doing#anything at all. going about this au with a 'just do it. doesnt matter if its good or coherent just do smth and have fun with it'.
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im exploding into a million pieces i found a reddit thread about butches in video games (specifically looking for them) in hopes that there was some kind of lesser known dream daddy-esque butch dating sim or SOMETHING cute like that and guys the fucking crumbs we have to live on you're actually killing me. im withering away why are there no kissable butches in video games im going to throw up and kill everyone. nobody wants a butch dating sim apparently. im gonna go weep in the fetal position
#everybody ignore this it's so stupid but#it's like heres a stard.ew valley mod where you can make leah butch and um idk starf.ield bg characters#and a baldgate3 character. IM CRYING WHERE ARE THE BUTCHES#'why is this making me emotional' (<- very understandable why it would make me emotional)#howling into the night sky ripping ny shirt in twain transforming into a big hairy beast bc i love butches sm#GUHHHHHHHHHH CMONNNNN#i just wanna see people's cute drawings of dykes ok. where is our version of bara#where is it please#im begginbg the universe generally#i need a hero (the song) is emanating from my pores rn. where are they we deserve so much better than this#gahhhh it's all overly palatable softgirl yuri fuckk. where are my big sweaty hairy braless deep voiced dykes im going to kill someone#when is it my turn to be happy wuagghhh#not to say i dislike softgirl yuri but i do not want to kiss them!! sorry but that is a big motivator for this#is wanting a 2d boyfriend (/dyke) because everyone else gets to have one :((#and also like. wanting to see dykes reflective of irl dykes rather than yuri for representation purposes that matter to me personally#and the gender euphoria that can often come from that but also FUCKK#nguhhhhhh oughhhhhh ahhhhhhhhgh. im such a fucking faggot im sick of this#a large chunk of the sapphic population is just completely not represented it's like they only exist in my mind#i never seen them around me either this shit sucks fuck my stupid baka life. wehehhh#exploding into a million pieces#im never expressing any kind of gay yearning again after this im done#is it too much to ask that i see people like me out there?? in many ways but tonight specifically in a butch way#ppl when they even think for a moment of making lesbian media where the dykes aren't sifted through straight attractiveness filters: 😱#again a lesbian dating dim w femmes would rule as well but it's all high schoolers and vaguely anime-hot women#and thats not good enough. it's like if they give a girl a big nose they'll fucking die immediately#maybe the real reason i consume so much homoerotic buff guy media is because SOMETIMES ppl draw them as butches#(<- not the reason but maybe loosely vaguely part of the reason)#anyway this was inspired by me watching ppl react to like. a popular pretty boy dating sim#and trying to figure out some equivalent experience for me but i can't bc none of it is made for me#killing everyone and then killing them again. hatred
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Imagine me asking someone to trigger warn for a de-fib. Embarrassing.
#I used to thing a lot of things needed trigger warnings#until I remembered that I am never going to filter it out#and it’s a little ridiculous sometimes#anyways this post brought to you by my previous post#where I was like it’d be kinda funny if I had to tw flaming text gif#then it went to tw me#and I wa alike#what if one specific person had a thing for mii#and I would totally cave and tw for specific things like that#if you went into my ask box and went ‘can you trigger warn that mii post my brother used to print them out to scare me’#I would fall so madly in love that I would tw it in an instant#I was going to add ‘faggot behavior’ to the end#but I don’t want to have to clarify that it’s like I’m good faith and I can say that and it was in jest#👋 okay actually going to sleep now#anyways
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I think maybe I'm no fun
#i don't wanna be like THERE'S NO GOOD GAMES ANY MORE but like#scrolling past 3 posts in a row of FILTERED TAGS AND CONTENT#for games I'm TRULY sick of hearing about that came out in the last 1-2 years#like. i Feel games are less good#but also. maybe I'm the common denominator. maybe games are fine. other people like them which is why I'm sick of hearing about them#I'm open to the possibility that I'm just no fun any more. i do know I'm Worse at games for sure#having gone back to play games i used to be good at and enjoyed#but the kinds of games I'm Sick Of aren't really the kinds of games i think I'm now Not So Good At either#idk. maybe it's a bit of both. I'm gonna play Great God Grove maybe sometime this weekend and i loved Smile For Me so there is hope#that i am not simply an aging curmudgeon#if nothing else I'm gonna KEEP TRYING NEW GAMES#except the new DA. that one i KNOW would be a waste of money (< hated DAI)#even staunch DA enjoyers aren't really pleased with it so like. being a hard DAO fan i think I'd truly hate it
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Tbh the whole metal sonic having a hedgehog oc thing is honestly so good. Yes. The murder robot also deserves the joy of dressing up as a character she made. Reminds me of those sonic ocs that edgy kids used to make that were basically just like. emoer amy rose or something. And I mean that with the most love in the world cause i was one of them kids. He is kinda just an edgy kid too. They deseve the freedom
She literally is my emoer Amy Rose from when I was like nine she is just also in universe Metal Sonic's emoer Amy Rose. (her outfit is actually very vaguely meant to resemble classic amy's since like, metal cares about like three or four people enough to remember them by name and amy is one of them bc, y’know, sonic cd, she considers amy one of the few living things that was useful to her bc she used her as bait she is in universe literally designed after amy rose bc metal was trying to exploit sonic's heroism for like literally two minutes until they started bantering.)
#In the timeline I have set out Metal Sonic would be around 14-ish mentally at the time so yeah very much an edgy kid#like he's a pretty horrible person who enjoys people's suffering at that point but like. it’s kind of literally all she knows lol#they also kinda can't really Have the same set of morals as anyone else bc they think in a fundamentally different way#like its whole perception of reality is based around it having one specific purpose in life that it can’t change#everything is filtered through hir need to be superior and to destroy sonic#she's not an inherently evil being but she has very warped views on the world and a perspective that’s pretty alien#and very often unpalatable bc it’s defined by violence superiority obsession and obedience#but that doesn’t mean he can’t care for people or do good things it just means he normally approaches them in odd ways#usually through 'helping people makes me better at being the true sonic'#or 'these organic beings are useful and therefore it is logical to help them'#or sometimes just flat out boredom#coming into the world with a singular predefined goal fucks you up mentally basically#can u tell I’ve been thinking about them for like a decade
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