#something something imagining and projecting a healthy and caring mother and son relationship on my oc's

[vamprnce]

thinking of my old oc's lately that I wanna revamp (some design and story wise) for a horror adjacent story and having a single mom who's badass, protective and loving of her autistic trans son made me realize I'm projecting somewhat hegbehg,,

[shizunitis]

Luo Binghe & Tianlang-Jun: Origins. And a Bit of Projection.

Disclaimer: This is basically just a collection of quotes from The Scum Villain's Self-Saving System, Volume 3, accompanied by (adjective) thoughts, and then even more relevant quotes listed at the end. If I could, I’d paste the entirety of Chapter 18.

“As expected, I can’t bring myself to hate humans.” — Vol. 3, Chapter 21: Always Together

I will always be conflicted on the topic of Tianlang-jun, and it annoys me. There is so much I could say about him, and so little I can successfully articulate. He is, to me, more confounding, complex and tragic than Shen Jiu.

He’s pitiful and awe-inspiring, wicked and affable, cunning and wide-eyed in his curiousity. He is a compelling, heartbreaking character. He alternates between emotionless wisdom and mournful apathy. I admire how his knees don’t buckle under the weight of his grief, but how he crumbles at the barest hint of hope. How rage claws at him and, still, he can’t figure out how to make it stick.

I empathise with him. I understand him.

But then, in the distance, Luo Binghe's indifferent voice disturbs the silence, causing me to drop my drink onto the floor and this post onto your screen:

“He’s not my father.”

It’s an interesting exercise, exploring their relationship in reconciliation fics. To see them interact (semi-)honestly, watch them take turns filling up the chasm between them. It’s wonderful. Every fic I’ve read centred around them was a delightful read that I still think about.

However. I cannot see Tianlang-Jun, as I understand him, as Luo Binghe’s father. And not just because of the 3rd Novel’s events.

But because Binghe had hoped for something; he did have that wide-eyed wonder. He did hold one last window open, for the sake of an improbability he couldn’t quite, just yet, dismiss.

It’s what (most) orphaned and/or adopted childred do.

Though Luo Binghe had never said a word about it before, Shen Qingqiu knew that he harbored some fantasies about his birth parents. […] In fact, he’d always secretly fantasized about whether his parents might still be alive, and how well they’d treat him, and how they’d never let him suffer the mildest slight. — Vol. 3, Chapter 17: Tianlang

It is the most human thing; to want to be helped, accepted, invited by those given to you. A family is given to you. Whether you believe it an act of the divine, of nature, of coincidence, it isn’t something you fight for. It’s the first and, arguably, only thing you don’t have to fight for in life.

Depending on a multitude of factors, that can be a blessing or a curse; but where there is room for interpretation, questions left unanswered, most childred—Binghe included—will turn to their imagination, and try to make sense of it. Usually, to comfort themselves, to reassure themselves that surely, if their family could, they would have.

And, yeah. Most likely, if the Palace Master had gotten punted into the Sun like he fucking deserved, they would have. But does it matter?

In the face of a bleak reality, what comfort is a could-have-been?

He liked to call Luo Binghe “that son of mine,” but he didn’t seem to possess any concept of fatherly affection. […] Luo Binghe was in fact…someone who was unloved by even his own parents. — Vol. 3, Chapter 15: Holy Mausoleum

What use are good intentions to an abandoned child? What consolation is it, to say, They gave birth to you, when that child has seen no evidence of their care? Does it dry their tears, that their mother can’t be here, but she surely would have wished to be? That their father would protect them, if only he knew of them?

(And don’t make me tell you about the visceral horror I felt reading the Origins chapter. I’ve yet to make my peace with it. MXTX, Airplane, whoever: you’ve ruined me.)

The washerwoman was and continues to be, to Binghe, his only mother. And I would argue, that’s healthy. Even independent of his other traumas (Abyss, Shizun’s betrayal, Xin Mo’s influence, living on the streets, etc, holy shit Binghe) Luo Binghe will not accept anyone else as his mother.

“Who is this Su Xiyan?” Luo Binghe asked coldly. “My mother was a mere washerwoman.” — Vol. 3, Chapter 18: Origins.

It may seem callous. It probably even is! But it is a healthy line he’d drawn by his own initiative. It’s what helps him, what he feels he needs to do in order to do right by his mother, and his own heart.

And! Tianlang-Jun doesn’t seem to give much of a shit, either!

Won’t, probably, even in the future, once the dust will have settled. He is exhausted, weary with carrying the corpse of his love, the loss of his nephew. Whatever goodwill he shows, it’s a perfunctory sort, because he can’t afford more.

So. Uhh.

Tianlang-Jun is not a character I can love, nor one I can hate. Usually, I can’t help but be inclined to love complex characters. Like them, too—though that’s more of an action-based thing rather than just said character’s personality.

But with Tianlang-Jun, I’m stuck whichever way I turn. If I want to love/like him, I’m drawn back by Binghe’s pain and disappointment. If I try to hate/dislike him, I’m drawn back by his own history and grief.

In conclusion:

I don't know! I'm not really trying to, like, prove anything. I still love the aforementioned TLJ & LBH fics, I still love their dynamic. I started walking and ended up exactly in the same space. This, perhaps, could be considered a Heavenly Demon Family Mobius Strip!

I'm not really trying to say anything. It just… makes me feel conflicted, and angry, and whenever I allow myself to think about it a bit more, sad.

But.

However!

Alas.

Nonetheless, even.

As a reader and—on my better days—a writer, all I can say is:

As promised/threatened: some selected passages, for your reading pleasure:

So, it looked like neither the father nor the cousin had any intention of acknowledging Luo Binghe. — Chapter 15: Holy Mausoleum

He liked to call Luo Binghe “that son of mine,” but he didn’t seem to possess any concept of fatherly affection. — Chapter 15: Holy Mausoleum

Tianlang-Jun lifted his hand, took a look at Luo Binghe’s snow-pale face, and commented indifferently, “He looks like his mother.” “His eyes look like yours,” came a chill voice from the side. — Chapter 15: Holy Mausoleum

The faint hopes and dreams Luo Binghe had held in his heart for many years had been mercilessly pulverized into so much dust. […] [Tianlang-Jun] refused to speak a single word of their relationship and had been utterly ruthless back in the Holy Mausoleum. […] To his parents, Luo Binghe was an unwanted child. — Chapter 18: Origins

“If he was my father, why didn’t he bring it up earlier? Why not tell me?” The most Tianlang-Jun had said was that single line he offered while beating up Luo Binghe, devoid of either praise or criticism: “He looks like his mother.” He looks like his mother. What of it? But that was all. There was nothing more. — Chapter 18: Origins

Luo Binghe was indifferent. “He’s not my father.” […] Luo Binghe shook his head. It was unclear what he was stubbornly clinging to, but he repeated, “He’s not my father.” — Chapter 18: Origins

Luo Binghe raised his smiling face, his eyes shining brightly. “Mother was the kindest person in all the world to me.” — Chapter 19: Shen Jiu

[nct-oli]

I understand Phupha. I really do. And I desperately want to ramble about his motivations through this story, so read on if you want to go through the journey of Phupha’s character depth with me!

(Note: I haven’t opened the tags or anything yet since watching the episode because I genuinely wanted to get all of my own thoughts written out before I bring in influences from other people, so if someone made a post like this already, I apologize and I promise I didn’t see it!!)

Let’s look at Phupha’s decisions and thought processes right now. He received an order from Tian’s dad to protect Tian in the village. When he received that order, he had never met Tian. Of course he wasn’t going to say no, and of course he was going to assume that Tian was a rich kid with poor intentions coming to the village. How many rich kids before Torfun had come to the village and abandoned ship when things got tough? Plus Phupha cares about the kids; he probably hated seeing these teachers enter and exit their lives so often. Not to mention, it probably would have made Phupha’s life easier to not have to take on this extra duty of caring for Tian.

But then Tian showed up, and things changed so quickly. Sure, maybe Phupha helped him extra at the very beginning out of duty, but in doing so, he got to know him even more quickly. And through that, feelings developed so fast. Let’s look at Tian bathing, for example. Phupha knew Tian had a bathhouse at his home, and yet, he took him to the waterfall. Why? Was that not wasting his own time? He so easily could have said, “You need a bath? Behind the house.” And yet, he took him to the waterfall anyways, for no real reason. Perhaps it was to test him, but more than anything, I think he was just trying to tease him and spend time with him. And when he slept at his house, sure, maybe it could have just been to protect him out of duty, but asking Tian what he had for dinner just because he wanted to talk to him was never in the order given by Tian’s dad. That was solely because he enjoyed Tian’s company.

We all know that Phupha’s care for Tian was never just out of duty. It may have started that way, but it so quickly progressed past that. Which is why Tian finding out his father was involved must have been so devastating. It completely contradicted what he was so certain was true. I mean, hell, drunk Phupha even confessed to Tian. He knew Phupha’s feelings were not out of duty, but he was still lied to (which is a whole rant on its own).

I’ve been thinking a lot too about Phupha’s love language. From what I can see, his top love language is acts of service, and more specifically, through his protection. Phupha loves the village. He loves the forest. And he loves Tian. When Tian started to understand Phupha’s love language, I think he recognized that as being Phupha’s expression of love toward him. And because Phupha protected him so strongly, Tian read that as Phupha’s love for him being so fierce (which it absolutely was, of course).

As their relationship blossomed, Tian continuously thanked Phupha for protecting him. And on surface level, yes, he was genuinely thanking him for keeping him alive and safe in the village. But digging deeper, he was thanking him for loving him, because he recognized Phupha’s expression of love is told through his dedication to keeping the people he loves and the forest safe. So when Tian was sitting by Phupha’s bedside begging him to wake up and continue protecting him, it wasn’t just him wanting Phupha to keep him safe. He was literally begging him to wake up and continue loving him.

Hence why, when the bandaid was ripped off and he found out his father had ordered Phupha to protect Tian, he started questioning where the line was between duty and love. And then Phupha wouldn’t admit to Tian that what Tian perceived as acts of love and not duty were exactly that, acts of love, that he hadn’t been imagining it. Not only that but when the emotions got high, Phupha lied to him, saying it was never personal and that it was all for just his job, breaking Tian’s heart.

Do I agree with the way he handled it? No. I think the saying harsh words to make Tian hate him rather than communicating properly was absolutely the wrong way to go. But do I understand it? Yes.

Before going any further into that though, let’s talk about Phupha’s reasoning for siding with Tian’s father over Tian. First of all, the obvious is that Tian’s father is a well-respected authority figure, who also easily has the connections to ruin Phupha’s career (not that he necessarily would but he could if he wanted to). As much as we all want Phupha to disregard Tian’s father’s orders, we all know he’s in a tough spot. He doesn’t just love Tian; he also loves the village and the forest, and he dedicated his life to protecting them. He has to weigh that into his decision too.

But beyond that, Phupha has so much respect for his late father. A lot of the lessons he did not understand when his father was alive were lessons he came to understand as he carried on his father’s missions. He said earlier in the show that he did not understand his father’s dedication to the forest until he dedicated his own life to it. He recognized the wisdom his father tried to pass on to him that he was hesitant to accept.

And so to have Tian’s father telling Phupha that Tian has a good life back in Bangkok, of course he’s going to project some of his respect for his own father onto Tian and Tian’s father, failing to recognize that the two situations aren’t the same. In addition to that, he probably does have a feeling of “if my father was still alive...” And knowing Tian’s father is there wanting to take care of Tian and see his life progress, of course he’s going to respect that. That’s why Phupha even told Tian he shouldn’t think less of his father.

Plus we’ve seen how watching Phupha’s mother grieve affected him personally. When Tian’s father mentioned how his mother hadn’t seen her son, and knowing how she almost lost Tian, I’m sure there was also some guilt for wanting to keep Tian to himself when he watched his own mother grieve. Of course, Tian hadn’t passed away like Phupha’s father, but the feeling of loss is similar enough.

I also assume there are some cultural differences regarding family dynamics and respect that I cannot speak to given I am not Thai.

So from that perspective, of course he started to believe that Tian’s father knew best. He didn’t know how miserable Tian was in Bangkok; he didn’t get to see the way Tian’s frown turned to a smile or how suddenly bright his world became when he came to the village. He never saw any of that.

And if we move on past Phupha’s family history, we all know Phupha is fearful of vulnerability. He’s closed himself off his entire life, it seems, from love. And by the time he hit 30, he probably accepted that would be his life: protecting the forest and returning to an empty bed. Opening himself up to Tian was not easy for him, and now when he finally allowed himself to dream of a less lonely life, it’s been threatened. And to avoid being hurt any further, he’s choosing to throw it away himself. It gives him the false perception that this was his own choice, not someone else’s. I’d even go as far as to say him losing his father is an example of a time when he had pain thrown at him that was not his own choice, and there’s probably some trauma from that that he still has to work through. Then he similarly lost Torfun and has had to work through that pain as well. Is it healthy to push his own happiness away at the first sign of trouble? Absolutely not. Plus it hurts Tian. But does it make sense given everything we know about him? Absolutely yes.

(Side note: Tian did the same thing before the surgery. He was wreckless because it gave him a sense of power regarding his own fate when it felt like his pain was being controlled by someone or something else.)

So now here we are, episode 9, Phupha is trying to do the right thing. Of course this story is showing us Tian’s perspective mostly, and so we empathize with Tian more. But I think it’s really important to acknowledge how Phupha is a character with so much depth, who will make mistakes just as Tian did and who deserves to receive the same forgiveness and consideration we give Tian.

When we look at Phupha, we know his intentions are good. He genuinely loves Tian, and especially throughout the events of this episode, he finally started to see how the guilt Tian felt about Torfun was eating him alive, how he was trying to live his life to make up for the life she had lost rather than for the life he had been given. And because he loves Tian so much, he wanted better for him.

That’s why he made him promise to value himself and to live his life for himself from now on. Of course, we all know there’s a disconnect between what he wants for Tian and the options he’s presenting Tian to pick from.

But just like Tian had a bandaid ripped off, Phupha did too. Tian thought Phupha’s intentions were purely out of love and started questioning why he made the decisions he did. Phupha thought Tian’s love for the village and even for him were straight from his own heart, and then when he found out Tian was purposely living his life as Torfun did, he didn’t know what to make of his intentions anymore. Of course, just as Tian was never wrong about Phupha acting out of love when he was protecting him, Phupha was never wrong about Tian acting out of love when interacting with the children and the rest of the villagers.

Yet he doesn’t know that. In his mind, Tian was always living someone else’s life. In his mind, Tian’s life must have been back in Bangkok because suddenly it didn’t seem like it was here. Suddenly the life he was living here in Pha Pun Dao was Torfun’s. And then when Tian starts insisting he’ll stay if Phupha tells him his feelings, of course he’s going to suddenly feel like it would be selfish to do so. Like I said, now he believes Tian’s life really is back in Bangkok. And he has Tian’s father telling him that too.

And we know he always believed that to some extent, given his response to the rangers when they wanted Tian to extend his stay. He told them he had college to finish and a bright future ahead of him. He hadn’t believed his future would be in the village and certainly not with him. It was when he allowed himself to be more vulnerable that he gave in and asked Tian to stay. But now with everything that happened since then, no wonder he felt selfish not wanting Tian to leave.

Acts of service. Phupha showing his love through protection. This right here is Phupha trying to protect Tian once again. This is Phupha trying one last time to show Tian his love language. Even if he’s hurting Tian in the process.

All of this is to say, is Phupha in the wrong right now? Yes. Of course. I’m going to write a separate post about Tian and how I believe this story will end, but we can clearly see how Phupha is contradicting himself right now. He wants Tian to choose himself and live his life for no one else, and yet he isn’t giving Tian the option to stay in the village for himself. He immediately threw away the idea that that was even a possibility, and it’s hurting both him and Tian.

But Tian has been in the wrong many times before, despite having a heart of gold and good intentions. And that’s where Phupha is too. He wants to do the right thing, but his own guilt and fear are keeping him from even seeing the true right thing.

Like I said, I’m going to write an entirely separate post about how I believe this story will end and why I think the ending will be beautiful. But I’m not worried. I think this is a test of not only Tian and Phupha’s relationship but also the two of them as individuals. I genuinely really love Phupha as a character, and I respect the way he tries so hard. He’s allowed to be wrong too sometimes.

[fundielicious-simblr]

For personality, 3 and 9! For background, 2 and 3. For relationships, 2. And for fun facts, 16 and 17 :) You can pick whichever sim you like!

This is gonna be a LONG one, so grab your popcorn and get ready to scroll 

ooo I think I might pick the first 6 sims from the ‘heir’ family, so I’ll do from Adalynn to Reece - let’s also assume that they’ve already mentioned reading the Bible/devotionals etc because to write it down 6 times would be hella repetitive.

Personality

[3]��What are their hobbies and interests? Do they have any particular “favorites” (food, books, and so on)?

Adalynn - One of her favourite hobbies is to play the piano, but with 5 children she doesn’t get to do it as much as she’d like. She also loves spending time out in the yard cultivating her different plants and flowers, when she lived at home she and macie were in charge of their large garden, and now she mainly focuses on growing fruits and vegetables that her family can eat, she’s hoping to one day add a beehive for fresh honey but for now she’s happy with what she’s got.

Barrett - He’s interested in any kind of handiwork, while living at home it was him that maintained different items around the home that needed to be upgraded. Fishing is also a great love of his, probably his favourite, for a while he worked on a fishing boat, but when he and Kyleigh had the triplets he changed jobs to one that would pay more and was more safe.

Macie - Her absolute favourite hobbies are cooking and gardening, she cooks all of the meals for the family and enjoys experimenting with things grown in the garden. She loves taking care of babies whenever she has the chance, which with the family she’s got means there’s always a baby for her to take care of. 

Zoe - Zoe’s absolute favourite hobby is to sing and make music, in-game her character autonomously sits at the piano to play music all the time so I think it fits her personality well. She also spends time writing music, so she’ll read books on music theory from time to time.

Maggie - She took her favourite hobby and turned it into a career, she’s been into photography since she was young but prefers to take more editorial pieces that let her be as creative as she wants. With encouragement from Shane (her husband) she’s gotten more into fantasy series that I imagine are popular in the sims that she never had exposure to as a child (think Divergent series, the Hunger Games trilogy, and the Twilight Saga for true teen cringe)

Reece - Like Maggie, he also took his favourite hobby/interest and turned it into a career, when he’s not working on his freelance programming jobs he’s working on an app. It’s a personal project that he enjoys doing to destress when work get’s a little too much. In my head he’s also going to dabble in robotics, so that’ll appear some time in game.

[9] What are they most afraid of?

For this one, let’s assume they’ve all said “other than going to hell” because again, that shit gets repetitive real quick. Even these are pretty repetitive since its normal for people to be scared of losing loved ones.

Adalynn - Something going wrong during pregnancy or birth, the delivery with Joshua (#5) went wrong and could have ended very badly. The issue with Adalynn is that it’s been put into her head that home births are the best thing, so while she’s afraid of something going wrong, she’ll need her husband Mason to step in and let her know that she has other options.

Barrett - Something happening to his wife Kyleigh in labour and him having to care for their (right now) 9 children. So far the various births of their children have been fine, but there’s always a chance of something happening. There’s also the fear of something happening to someone in his family like his parents and siblings.

Macie - Deep down she’s afraid she’s never going to find someone to marry, she’s in the sims equivalent of her 30s with no man in sight. There’s also the fear of something happening to her family, they are her everything so she hates to imagine something bad happening.

Zoe - Other than losing her family, it would be losing her ability to sing. It’s one of the non-familial things that brings her joy.

Maggie - Losing control of her life, growing up everything she did was dictated, and now that she has more freedom to make her own decisions she’d hate to lose it.

Reece - Reece is scared of becoming a horrible person, he saw with Stacie’s dad and (in less extreme cases) other men how easy it is for power to get to someones head and for them to hurt the ones they’re suppose to love. Men are given all the power and can run wild with reckless abandon at the expense of their family, and Reece would hate to put his family in that position. 

background

[2] What’s their family like?

These 6 are all siblings, so I’ll do one large group answer and try and get all the perspectives in. Their family is a large, very conservative, fundamentalist family with links to many others who believe the same things as them. Their grandfather was a well known politician so they grew up knowing that they were related to someone great, but they never experienced the wealth that one would think comes with having famous family. In their childhoods they experienced a working class/lower middle class lifestyle due to their father not having a full time job other than being a pastor. The older girls took on the brunt of the child rearing as they aged and as a result have more of a mother/child bond with some of their younger siblings, and when a girl gets married there is a lot of tears when they move away. Their parents have your classic fundamentalist christian relationship, their father is the head of the family, under him is their mother, and lastly is them; their mother defers to their father on all decisions, but in this case she realised early on that she has domination of how the home is run and therefore has a bit of leeway to subtlety get what she wants. The children were to obey their parents immediately and without hesitation, so as they grew up, got married, and were able to make their own rules - some struggled with the new found freedom whilst others flourished. With 13 children there’s a lot of personalities and not everyone gets along 100% of the time, so there’s a lot of effort put forward for them all to get along as they’re always seeing each other. 

[3] What factions or organizations are they a part of? What ranks and titles do they hold?

oo this is interesting cause this is something you’ll see more of in a series I'll be introducing in a bit, but for now I’ll explain their ‘leanings’.

Adalynn - She and her husband Mason are like their parents and remain very conservative Fundamentalists (skirts only, homeschooling their children etc), they also practice the quiverfull (QF) lifestyle and abstain from family planning as they feel God will bless them with however many he sees fit for them. Their parents (and Adalynn’s grandparents I guess) joined an organization called the ‘Centre for Learning and Life’ (CFLL) and attend many homeschool conferences arranged by the organization for those who use their materials. Due to the connections they gained as a result of her grandfather, several members of her family (including her parents) are asked to speak at events on their different areas of speciality. She and her husband actually met at a conference.

Barrett - he and his wife Kyleigh are also like their parents and remain very conservative Fundamentalists (skirts only, homeschooling their children etc), they too practice the quiverfull (QF) lifestyle and abstain from family planning as they feel God will bless them with however many he sees fit for them.Their parents joined an organization called the ‘Centre for Learning and Life’ (CFLL) and attend many homeschool conferences arranged by the organization for those who use their materials - these two also met at a conference that they attended with their families.

Macie - Macie is still unmarried and therefore lives at home. She has the same viewpoint as her parents and older siblings, and should she marry she would live the life her parents did. She attends conferences with her parents, and now is even asked to speak to encourage girls on the value of purity and modesty. 

Zoe - Right now, Zoe and her husband Francisco fall into the category of fundamentalist, but not necessarily QF. They’re both against hormonal birth control, but have been looking into Natural Family Planning as after the birth of their son Javier Jr, Zoe would like to change things up and have more of a chance to plan things out. Zoe still does attend some homeschool conferences when she can, but now her priorities are different.

Maggie - Maggie and her husband Shane are conservative christians, they’re more secular than her immediate family but still conservative enough in comparison to the average sim.

Reece - Reece and Stacie are technically fundamentalists as that is the stance of the church they attend, but in their home they don’t subscribe to every single belief in an orthodox way (see personality Q9 for the reason why) They’re open to children, but with Stacie’s health issues being a factor they’re happy as long as everyone is healthy.

Relationships

What’s their friend group like? What role do they play in it?

Adalynn - Her main friend group are her sisters Macie and Zoe, as well as her sister in law Kyleigh. She doesn’t have much time for socialization but is friendly with the ladies at church and loves fellowshipping before and after a service. With her sisters, Adalynn’s role is the motherly one I guess, always there to lend a listening ear and be a shoulder to cry on. She’s the oldest and has therefore done the most emotional labour on behalf of her siblings. 

Barrett - He’s close with his brothers (despite the age gap), his male cousins close in age to him, and his brothers-in-law. Sometimes a group of them will plan a fishing trip, or a hiking trip, or even just plan to go to the gym together. As the oldest boy, a lot of them look up to him for advice on different things.

Macie - Her closest friend in proximity to her right now is her mother, but she’s also got a great bond with her sister’s Adalynn and Zoe. They formed a strong bond over the course of their childhood, which continues to be strong even after her sisters got married and moved away. Macie’s role amongst her sisters was to always be the voice of reason in terms of the proper way things should be done, she’s also always willing to do something to help someone even if it is a detriment to herself.

Zoe - Zoe is close to her sisters mentioned above, and is now slowly forming a friend group of other military wives whose husbands are deployed in the same area that she is. Amongst her sisters, Zoe is the one to try her hardest to cheer someone up when they’re upset, and it always recommending them something that all cheer them up.

Maggie - Maggie has found a group of girls at her church and at her work that she gets along great with, her gregarious personality means that she’s always making people laugh and can crack joke after joke without pausing to take a breath. Maggie is also close to her sisters, but she’s closest to Macie as they were together a lot growing up, she’s close to her younger sisters as well and also takes on the role of joker in that friend group.

Reece - Reece is close to his brothers and his cousins, his easy going personality means that he can insert himself into any friend group and get along with most people. His quiet yet thoughtful nature means that people can ask him for advice and get thoughtful and helpful answers.

Fun Fact

[16] Which Deadly Sin do they most correspond to? Which Heavenly Virtue?

oo this is interesting, let me pull them up and workout who is who

Adalynn - Sin: Gluttony - She really should've stopped having children like 2 kids ago, but here she is pregnant with kids 6&7 // Virtue: Patience --> She’s honed her patience after years of caring for her siblings and now her children.

Barrett - Sin: This one was a toss up between lust (9 children with idea how many more in the future) and gluttony (having too many damn children) // Virtue: Diligence - He’s willing to put in whatever work is needed to feed his family.  

Macie - Sin: Envy - She’s jealous of all her siblings finding love whilst she’s single // Virtue: Chastity - she loved the extreme modesty rules her parents set in an effort to remain pure, and as a result teaches others about said rules.

Zoe - Sin: Pride - Zoe is talented and she knows it, she’s been praised for her talent since she was a child meaning she’s well aware of her skills // Virtue: Kindness - She truly is really nice, her sim in game has some of the best relationships with other people and a great reputation.

Maggie - Sin: Envy - Maggie spent her childhood envious of other people with more freedom than her to do what she couldn't, she was so envious that she married barely out of high school to make her own rules. // Virtue: Liberality - Maggie is always giving to charity and wants to spend her own money on her own choices, with charities being one of them.

Reece - Sin: Wrath - this is purely from when he and Stacie were still getting to know each other and he had to keep himself from whooping Stacie’s dads ass for being a dunderhead. // Virtue: Diligence - like his brother, he’s willing to do anything necessary for his family.

There was also 17 - but I have literally 0 experience with tarot cards 😂

WHEW this was a lot, but like I said, I enjoy doing these - as I was writing I literally added in somethings that I felt just matched the sims personality, so I have to go update the google doc 😂

[ichor-and-symbiosis]

(1/3) Hear me out (Tenko and Hero!GF) imagine this, Kotaro force Tenko to breakup with you by telling him he’ll ruin your reputation. Because your reputation shouldn’t be tinted because of his father, Tenko did. You’re is left heart broken and sobbing without a proper reason. Tenko fell into depression, which mean Kotaro can manipulate Tenko into doing what he wants: marry a girl from a well off family/non-hero. Tenko did. He doesn’t love that girl. But he did to keep his father happy. - 🌹

i am an absolute RAT for neglecting these beautiful asks for so long, especially considering this is my favorite au!! i’m sorry anon, i had this written a while ago and had no energy to finish it until now ;-; 

- there were many clever tactics kotarou thought of to break this relationship apart. he could have told tenko that his villainous quirk will only cast judgement upon you simply by association, or perhaps you had some secret that you did not want the world to know. either way, kotarou stops at nothing to convince tenko to break up with you, because in his mind, he believes he is doing this with tenko’s best interests at heart. this, to him, is not pettiness. this is a father trying to protect his son. - no signs indicated that your relationship would ever come to an end. if anything, you were both certain that you would marry each other soon, because you were madly in love. so when tenko breaks it off with you, you are left blind sighted and completely devastated. you hadn’t even imagined a life without him since you first started dating. and likewise, this was the hardest thing tenko has ever had to do. seeing you cry made him sick with guilt, but he only wanted to protect you from his father. this was a necessary evil. no matter how much you begged him to reconsider, tenko was convinced that you would be happier without him in your life, if only so that kotarou would not bother you. - you both fall into a deep depression after the breakup. tenko was always a bit withdrawn, but he had warmed up considerably when you entered his life. now, he was worse than ever, neglecting his health and personal life and not giving a damn about it. kotarou expected this, so he let his son grieve for some time. but when he notices that tenko isn’t getting any better, he takes matters into his own hands to help him forget about you. resigned to a life without you, tenko agrees to meet the girl kotarou wanted to set him up with. he may as well — they would all be subpar compared to you, so he may as well get it over with.

-  the young woman was born into a wealthy family and reaped the benefits of her heritage tenfold. she is vivacious and larger than life, older than tomura and upholds some of kotarou’s ignorant ideas, and is the perfect trust fund kid who has grandiose visions for useless ideas and far too much money to funnel into her projects. but it keeps her busy, and she is fairly nice to his family, so tenko goes with it. the hardest moments are when he starts to actually enjoy her presence, because his mind would immediately think about you. but those moments come as quick as they go. this woman always found some way to grate his nerves at least a little. -  while tenko struggles to regain a sense of normalcy in his life, you were at a crossroads. as if the breakup hadn’t been bad enough, you discover that you are pregnant. what the hell could you possibly do? should you confront tenko and fight to get him back? kotarou would only think of you as a gold digger trying to use your pregnancy to worm your way into his family. initially, you settle on simply telling tenko about it. no strings attached. you knew him, you knew that he wanted to start a family of his own. besides, this child was the fruit of your love, so how could he not love this child? - you feel invigorated. slowly but surely, tenko would come back into your life. except you stumble upon him with that woman, and all of your hopes and dreams come crashing down. you don’t know what hurts more: the fact that he moved on far quicker than you had, or that you were gullible enough to think he would still pine for you. - you carry through with the pregnancy all on your own. kotarou’s biased logic filtered through your head whenever you headed to work, reminding you that your career put you in danger and increased your chances of not living long enough to see your child grow. children, you had to remind yourself. you were carrying twins. - you decide to retire from the front lines to use your skill set in a safer setting. a simple office job. it was ideal for you and your new little family. the twins already lacked a father; you couldn’t bear the thought of them losing their mother, too. - the moment you see your newborn children for the first time, you break down into tears. they have dark hair just like him. and when their eye color sets in, it is that same crimson shade you loved so much. - it is difficult. motherhood is new territory for you, especially with two babies and a full-time job to juggle. but you make it work, because every time you come home to those sweet little faces, you feel so indescribably happy, even when a part of you still suffered from the loss of your lover. - four years later, tenko is in a hell of a rut. his life is mundane and he is constantly reminded of the fact that he married someone entirely incompatible with him. it had been easy to tolerate in the beginning, but once the honeymoon period wore off, the fighting began. his wife keeps pestering him to finally give her a child, and he dreads the inevitable. worst of all, he had managed to hear by word of mouth that you were no longer a hero, for whatever reason. you were no longer the thing that his father hated, and yet here tenko was, stuck in a loveless marriage when he could have been with you all these years. the thought makes him unspeakably angry at times, and unfortunately he lets it out on his wife. it is not a healthy relationship. - you, however, have moved on for the most part. there simply hasn’t been time to prolong your sadness when you had two hungry mouths to feed. tenko may not be in your life anymore, but you had your beautiful children and that was good enough for you. - you cross paths one day, completely by chance. who could ever think that a boring shopping trip would lead to tenko seeing you for the first time in years. and you looked just as beautiful as you always had. his heart clenched tightly in his chest and he felt his knees go weak at the sight of you. you hadn’t noticed him yet, and he took the opportunity to watch you for a little while longer. he didn’t know if he should go talk to you or not, and while his indecisiveness rooted him to the spot, his attention suddenly shifted to a little boy that tugged at your arm asking for sweets. tenko furrowed his brows in confusion, anxiety welling up within him as his suspicions were about to be confirmed. and then he sees the little girl holding your hand.- and he sees the dark hair. the red eyes. - he nearly throws up from the onslaught of emotions that overtake him. it couldn’t be. it just couldn’t be. - the little girl notices tenko staring at you and shyly whispers to you about the strange man hiding behind a stack of canned food. you lock eyes as the little boy demands tenko to stop being a creep, and you are both rendered silent, too shocked to do anything other than simply look at each other. old feelings resurface in an instant. you both feel a magnetic pull, and tenko nearly succumbs to it. you are the first to regain your senses, because you have children to take care of, and you could not afford to rouse their suspicion. with a brisk nod to tenko you usher the twins forward as you walk away. tenko is left standing there, numb and overcome with feelings.- he wants to go straight to his father’s house and kill him. his hands are practically itching from restraint, and he goes back to his old habit of scratching at his neck, even though you helped him get over this coping mechanism a while ago. tenko goes on a long walk instead, so long that his wife has been bombarding his phone well into the night, but he doesn’t care. he needs to think. he needs to understand what he saw. - one way or another, you both find each other again at the grocery store. tenko had been waiting for you for days in that store in hopes of seeing you, and you knew him well enough to know that he would do something dramatic like this. so you appear one day without the children, distant and polite as you finally muster up the mental fortitude to speak with him. - this conversation warranted a more serious setting, but tenko didn’t want to risk his wife seeing you, and you did not want him in your house. so you go to a large park and find a secluded area to talk. and talk you did, for a very long time. tenko is practically choking with guilt and resentment towards everyone in his life for putting you both in this ridiculous circumstance. if only things had been a little different, if only you two had a little more time together, then none of this would have happened. all of these years, wasted. worst of all, his suspicions were confirmed - those two children were his, and he missed out on so many important milestones. - he wants you back immediately. he wants you so, so fucking much, he’s never stopped loving you. and he tells you this, as selfish as it is. he hates himself for hurting you like this, because you had already moved on, but you are the mother of his children, damn it. you were his real family, not the woman he grew to resent. - you are too afraid to start a relationship just yet, but you do agree to introduce him to the children. tenko pulls you in for a bone crushing hug when you say that. he nearly kisses you, with how close your beautiful face is to his, but he restrains himself. there will be time for that later. he’s going to win you back, and he will never let you go. - for once, his life was starting to get better. tenko finally feels like he has a purpose, a direction in life. but he needs to settle a score. this time, he goes to his father’s house. and as soon as he sees him, he punches the bastard right in his face. the argument that ensues is perhaps the most severe they’ve ever had, even worse than when kotarou had to convince tenko to leave you. - when he tells kotarou about the children, he feels a sick satisfaction when kotarou falls silent, and his family is left in various stages of shock. he forbids them from talking to him, or trying to contact you. he wants nothing to do with his family, even his mother and sister. they may not have had any part in kotarou’s schemes, but they were always ultimately on his side, and he hates them now more than ever. hana of course does not allow this negativity to brew between them. she is team tenko for life from now on and is resolved to help him. his mother is devastated by how everything had fallen apart, how she had grandchildren she never knew about. she cries over this for days and doesn’t speak to kotarou. - when the initial shock of everything settles down, tenko is there for his children every step of the way. he fights hard to win their trust and friendship, which is relatively easy, because he already loves them so much and they can sense his joy when they want to be with him. - and how could your relationship with tenko not prosper? despite everything, you can’t resist falling back into deep friendship. but you can’t bring yourself to enter a physical relationship with him, no matter how horribly tempting it is, because tenko is still married and you can’t condone cheating. you don’t want to be the side chick, no matter how in love you two were. - tenko calls up his lawyer that night, gets those divorce papers, and hands them to his wife as soon as he sees her. and we all know he’s in for a hell of a fight. every excuse he offers is swiftly shut down. he’s fallen out of love with her? tough shit, that’s marriage. he’s cheating on her? now she’s not divorcing him out of spite. it’s only when he confesses that he has children that she becomes genuinely heartbroken. she’s always wanted children, and tenko always made excuses. now that she knows about you, about the history you two shared, she is so overcome with jealousy that she doubles down on her refusal to divorce him. - no problem. enter kotarou, properly whipped to hell and back by his family and eager to get on their good side again. he’s too damn old and tired to keep up the drama, especially now that you aren’t a hero. there just isn’t any point to all of this. his powerful business connections allow him to put pressure on the wife’s family to convince her to take a settlement and sign the papers. to tenko’s endless relief, she relents in the end. - with nothing standing in the way of your happiness, tenko moves in with you and you become a proper family. you get married as soon as you feel confident in his love for you again, and you conceive on your wedding night. tenko loves his children very much, but he is also ecstatic about the chance to be there for your third child, to feel like a proper father and support you like he’s always wanted to. - you better believe ya’ll live happily ever after.

[vacationcalendar]

7/19/21

Alright bitch, welcome back. Holy shit I make sitting down to blog look fucking impossible don’t I. Alright alright, let’s keep it pg-13 if we can..

I set an alarm for 10am to go off every day that just says BLOG TIME. I’d preferably like to get banging out words onto the page a little bit BEFORE that. It’s a powerful “awakening” activity in my experience, and I should be using that to my advantage. I also want to take as much time as I can on this project, especially if it’s psuedo-replacing a 40hr/week job. The earlier I get started the less I have to worry about what time it is when I’m done. My procrastination on day 2 has cost me the entirety of a sunny day. Well, it’s 2:30 now; so I imagine by the time I wrap this up I’ll have missed peek sun time. But who’s to say?

I’m starting to get that sense of dread again. That feeling I sometimes get when I can see hard plans lining my calendar far too densely populated for my liking. Big dentist appointment tomorrow. Day after that is a wash as far as I’m concerned. Even if my mouth miraculously heals in time to actually enjoy my Wednesday, I can already guarantee the psychic wounds of enduring an hours long, 600$-ish sit under the drill will take at least a couple extended sets of the fitful rest to recover from. Then I leave on Thursday to begin a full weeklong family vacation. And in that week I’ll have to figure out how to keep fucking blogging, or this thing is gonna stall out on the train tracks 100%. Do I have to explain that to you? I mean you get it; you know I’m right about that. I’m a naturally cowardly, sinful guy. I have to build up inertia on any remotely dutiful or healthy task, or I simply cannot keep it up...

So the next 3 days are all going to test my ability to actually sit here and write something. I’m really not going to want to, even though I want for literally nothing else right now. The only thing I want to do more than this creative process is to simply not exist at all. And it’s all compounded by these blasted plans. Fuck these plans. These are the dastardly plans that just cannot get canceled. They’re too high impact, and “good”(?). So then the fact that these blogs are also a “plan” just piles it up too high for me seemingly. It is quite clearly, objectively, not too much to handle. But I cannot help the fact that I feel claustrophobic. I just do. The strategy can’t be to NOT feel that way, it can’t be preventative. It has to deal with the feeling somehow. Hmmm... it’s tricky. To me, in this moment, as I’m typing this, it feels tricky. I honestly think that by the time I’m finished typing here, it WON’T feel so tricky. I’m certainly hoping that’s the case. 

Ok new track: Part of why I procrastinated so long today was pretty simple. I was hungover. I was hungover and I didn’t know what to talk about. Instead of going to be thinking about my usual faire, I was just thinking I feel like shit; I hope I don’t throw up. So I woke up late, slow, and with zero thoughts bouncing around my head. So I just watched LCS footage and read twitter, and by the time I got up and made coffee (mandatory for the blog. Blogging without coffee sounds insane. What would you ponderously sip between sentences? Water? How would that even work?) and sat down to write, I had squeezed out another full hour of procrastination. Now I won’t be hungover again for a while. This was a special occasion of sorts. Another one of my dreaded “plans.” Fuck’s sake. It was a 2nd meet up of Olivia’s peeps for drinks. It was penciled in after the first hang so that we could include everybody that didn’t make it the first time. Perfectly reasonable idea. And the first time sitting and drinking was so much fun that I sort of figured I was obligated to, pay my dues I suppose, for this second meet-up that sounded significantly less fun. But it was perfectly enjoyable. It had the energy of a hangout that could happen every single week like a sitcom. Very easy, probably more drinking than one could maintain if it were a weekly occurrence, but not too much. I don’t know where I’m going with this. Just record keeping, I guess?

Anyways, this morning was not the le morning that I can usually anticipate. So circumstances withstanding PLUS the procrastination ended up pushing the writing well past 3pm. These next 3 days (and the next 8 days after that, holy shit) are also going to mesh quite poorly with this sloppy, laissez-faire approach to getting this done. So I’m worried about it. Look, I want to do this, but I absolutely don’t want to have to worry about it. Is that asking too much? And obviously I can do this without worrying about it, in theory.  But I do not believe in myself, ok? I don’t. I’m telling you that right now. I want to cancel everything and just do this when I fucking get around to it. And, well; here’s the kicker. I didn’t mention this yet, and I probably should have. Once I get back from this GD vacation, my hiatus between jobs will officially be past a full month. I can hear the timer ticking in my head. I am in charge of how much sand I put in this particular hourglass. My mother will fully disagree with me there. I mean, I’m about to spend 8 days with someone who ask me every single day “so have you gotten your new job yet?”

You’re thinking, ‘Max, it’s not just impractical to ask a question with such a clear answer more than once without waiting for any circumstances to change, it flat out does not make any sense at all!’ I agree. We are on the exact same page guy. But you are missing the fact that “it doesn’t hurt to think about it. And maybe you can look online on your phone while you’re here trying to enjoy a vacation.”

Parents are weird. This feeling I’m describing is so relatable to some people. And other people just can’t parse it at all. There are a tiny handful of people in your life that will exist in totality literally forever. I mean one of you will die first, but for that person who died, the other people existed THE ENTIRE TIME. Minus like pre-birth and stuff, but that’s semantics. They are inevitable. They can travel all over the spectrum of human emotion vis-a-vi your relationship, but 99.9% of the grades will result in your staying completely still in your relationship to them. He sucks, but he’s my dad. He’s my dad, he’s fine. He’s my dad, I love him My dad’s the best! These father/son relationships all virtually fill up the exact same liminal space as far as I can tell. The way far ends of the bell curve are where it ever seems to yield different results. My dad is my best friend! One day I will kill my father, and I will finally be free of him. Let’s set those aside for this cross-section (vocab?). Every other relationship ship under the bell curve carries this seeming inevitability to it. These relationships seems like they get “finished” in a way. We know the personality of our parents so completely (and they have stopped changing/growing as people at a certain point), that we don’t actually have to go to them to learn about them. You don’t have to ask them questions or inquire about their opinions, because you can successfully deduce the answer using simple math. But THEN, you have to talk to them still, because they are close to you and want to learn about YOU, because you are still an incomplete puzzle. I don’t know, I just think the part of the parent/child dynamic where you have to share info with a parent even though the conversation has already been “solved;” the formality of it. The chore of it. That’s what it is. It’s chores. We know how chores are going to go, but until you actually do them, there’s this disorder. But instead of a dishwasher it’s a human being, that doesn’t “get” CRT. And if I can’t fucking convince my mother that my 28,000$ in savings will be able to tide me over for more than a week while I actually take a legitimate run at feeling fulfilled in my LIFE, convincing her to dismantle the foundation of our nation’s socio-economic structures in order to save our species from annihilation seems, I don’t know, tough.

Ok, I think I’m done. That took about an hour. I don’t think that’s bad at all. Am I still scared about tomorrow’s blog and therefore the rest of my life as I know it? Yes. Of course.

But at least you’ll be there with me when I get there. Take care bud, eat a good dinner tonight.

Love you

[charactersadvocatechimata]

Law of Life: Redheads are Absolute 14

Tony has never had what other people might call a healthy relationship with sleep. He was never sure if sleep itself and no interest in Tony as a person or if the problem lay with Tony himself. Whatever is was, didn’t change the nature of the relationship or at least Tony perceived it. A fight is violent no matter to motivation, and that was what sleep was for Tony. A battle. Falling asleep was always a struggle. Waking up was always a violent strike.

He never consider it to be taken quite so literally tho.

“What the fuck!” Everything hurts. Everything hurts. Hurts. Hurts. Hurts. Where is he? What happened? What? What? Where? A cave? Wire? Why are there wires in his chest? Where? Jarvis. Rhodey. Winter it hurts. His chest. What happened to his chest? What the fuck is in his chest? The world keeps sipping and walls, they are encroaching. It’s all too fast. Somebody make it stop. Make everything stop.

“Tony, don’t move.”

Tony tried to get up to move. But he couldn’t. There is a weight on his shoulders and on his chest. Nothing smells right. The pressure. He can’t move. Pressing down. He can’t breathe. Jarvis, he can’t breathe.  He tries to throw off the weight. But he can’t, it’s another wall. The wall. Encroaching walls and he can’t draw breath.

“Captain let him go.”

“But Sam.”

“No. No buts. And you Mister Stark, please do not waste my hard work. Relax.”

“Tony. Not Stark.”

“I’m Sam Wilson. Call me Sam, Tony.”

Tony takes a shaky breath trying to get his brain working. The sluggish motions of thoughts just wouldn’t do. Not in this situation. But at least now he remembers the attack. And the abduction. He traces a finger along the wires to a car battery. A. Car. Battery. “Despite my best efforts I do not run on batteries.”

Sam smiles wide, his beautiful teeth on show. “Nah, man. It’s for the magnet that’s keeping the shrapnel from reaching your heart and killing you.”

“Sam! Couldn’t you have put that more delicately?”

“You always gotta be straight with engineers.”

“He is an Omega.”

“Yeah, but he is an engineer first.”

“And he is right here. Nor is he happy about the car battery. I need something better. I need an arc reactor.”

Steve who is strangely sitting on the floor with his back against the wall projects his most stubborn posture and huffs very deliberately. “No. We need to escape.”

“Yeah? How do you plan on achieving that with both legs broken.”

“I’ll be fine in a week or two.”

Sam fully expressed ‘bullshit’ with a cock of his head. And well, Tony couldn’t blame the guy. It was hard to imagine that the spastic Alpha could be Captain America.

Tony ran another line around the circle of his. . . change. A magnet might prove an issue with the chip, and he wasn’t sure how far along JARVIS was learning to create or squish an algorithm to make it work. He might have to make his own way out, but he'd give his baby time. Enough time to get rid of this. . . battery for something more appropriate of Tony Stark.

“It’ll be fine Sam. JARVIS will locate us if I take too long. Probably.”

Steve perks up like one of those meerkats trying to find what’s up. It be cute if Tony didn’t think there was a lecture coming. “Why would Jarvis know where you are?”

“I might have, maybe just a little bit, made myself bait. It happened. Let’s move on.”

“You made yourself bait.” There is this look like Steve can’t comprehend Tony at the moment. Which is just rude.

“So what?! I get abducted all the time.”

“Tony.”

“What it’s fine.”

“God. Bucky is going to kill me.”

“What why?”

“Because he definitely is not going to blame you for this mess. Which means I get the short end of the stick.”

“Is this an Omega thing?”

“What? No! It’s a Bucky thing.”

“How this a Bucky thing?”

“You wouldn’t understand?”

“I wouldn’t- I wouldn’t understand. Do you realize who the genius is here?”

“Guys. No fighting. Bigger problems.” Sam gestures at the guys with guns.

And yes. There are men. With guns trying to look very threatening. It’s rather distracting.

@@@

Clint is nesting up in the space behind the kitchen cabinets. A space only a few people knew existed because Mom had built it for them. For Nat, Dad, and himself. To hide and to keep in tuned with their inner ninja as Mom put it. He was also working on building secret tunnels under the mansion since Nat and Dad preferred the ground. Not today. His sister was curled near him, every couple of beats widening her eyes carefully, but Clint just let the tears run their course. It seemed easier that way.

“Jarvis. Anything new?”

“No, Sir.”

It’s been more than a week, and Howard hasn’t said anything. Neither has Jarvis, but that can easily be laid at Howard’s feet too.

“What about the children?”

“They have been good, Sir. Early to rise, early to bed, and completing all of their homework.”

“Good. Good. Anything about Anthony?”

“Their Mother has all but vanished, their Father slithered back into the shadows, and the one person who should comfort them is dithering around the situation.”

“So they haven’t asked anything?”

“No. Sir. Clint has made several inquiries. But I have been unable to lift his spirits since I too am in the dark about the Young Master.”

“What? Are you implying I’m keeping some secret? Because I don’t know anything. Anthony could have just run off on us for all I know.”

“Liar!”

Howard swivels towards Clint’s hiding spot grabbing at his chest with wide eyes. “Didn’t I say no assassin antics? I did. Didn’t I Jarvis?”

“Yes, Sir.”

“It’s not Assassin antics, it’s spy antics. And Mom gave permission.”

“What are you doing up there?” Howard jabs his finger right at Clint’s, and Clint heard Nat snort behind him. It was hard to take the man seriously when he had to bend his neck all the way back to get a look at the lot of them.

“Spying. We want to know what happened to Mom. And don’t say ‘runoff’ because he would never do that to us. Never.”

“Fine. Tony has been kidnapped for an unknown motive, and not even Obidah has heard anything. Nor Pegs. Which raises the question of a secret spy organization’s worth if they can’t even find my fucking son.”

“I may have a rough location of Sir.”

“Gads! Jarvis, I’m going insane, I’m hearing an omniscient voice.”

Jarvis stifles a heavy sigh and a dramatic eye roll. “That is Jay Junior, Sir.”

“Right. Well, then. Lead the way my British hallucination.”

@@@

Today might have started a little high for Tony. Steve’s leg heals through, as he said, pure Brooklyn stubbornness which Tony was sure was bullshit. Sam had managed to snag and squirrel away a gun or two. Tony managed to, brilliantly he might add, completed a miniaturized arc reactor and a bomb that sent the cave to Timbuktu. He was in a good mood. Keep that in mind.

Next, of course, was to carry out the plan.

Steve managed to quickly take out the guards. Sam easily guide the group through the maze. From a map, he created inside his head. Inside his head based on the guard's movements. Tony had already decided to keep him before the bomb went off. Oh! The explosion went off beautifully. Sam spotted the searching military helicopters. Tony knew Rhodey would find him. Anywhere.

He saw Rhodey. And. . . him. And he was in a good mood. Okay. A good mood. So without thinking, he just leaped into his arms. Just one giant motion. The idiot caught him. Easily, of course. But it doesn’t mean anything. Okay. Not. A. Thing.

“You should just let me down now, Winter.”

Winter just snuggles his head against Tony’s neck, ignoring him, and starts some purr-growl noise nonsense. While Steve, Sam, Rhodey, Howard and the pups watched. Yeah. Just watching while Tony dies slowly from embarrassment. Not that he is that. Embarrassed. It’s just he meant to leap into his loving Rhodey’s arms. Yeah.

“They’re all watching, you know.”

“Don’t care.”

Well, Tony doesn’t care either. His flushed face is from the heat. That’s a thing. Bruce said so. Okay. Winter has started nipping at his neck. Tony can even feel his ears burning red.

“I didn’t know the infamous Tony Stark had a mate.” Sam is smirking next to Rhodey, who is also smirking. The traitors. Tony is going to leave them both out here to die.

“Oh, they're not mates. Tony is still available.” Steve pipes up. When he makes eye contact with Tony, he smiles shyly, but it slowly morphs into a puppy-dog like grin. As if the man forgot Tony’s Aunty Pegs is Peggy Carter. And she already warned Tony a long time ago never to fall for his innocent act. Of course, that now raises the question what the man is after.

It must be something good because Winter’s purrs have picked up into full growls now. And both Corncob and Mimmo are staring rather intently. Tony runs a hand through Winter's hair. He looks tired but still smiles up at Tony and leaves a small kiss on his wrist. “Pups. No killing.”

The two of them nod, which is something, but their eyes don’t bother leaving Steve’s face. But they’re good pups, so Tony is pretty sure they're not going to do anything too bad. Even as they stalk towards Steve and drag him off. Howard sniggers. “I warned the man. But he just didn't listen.”

“Warned him about what?”

“Nothing much.” Howard flaps his hand about and grins. Winter must be in on it too because he went back to cuddling. “By the way, Anthony, when are you going to declare Barnes, your mate? He kept his word and hasn't run off on you.”

“And you seem happy up there.”

“I happen to like the weather up here honey buns.”

Winter smirks with all his Alpha arrogance. Tony lets him. Cause he is a nice guy like that. “Mine. Mate.”

“Sure. I can live with that.”

Tony thought that Winter’s responding smile was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen. But that was probably the heatstroke talking.

First||Prev||Next

[jordan202]

My Boys: Beneath the Surface - Chapter 1

Hey Guys, I am back :)

So, as previously mentioned, I am starting a new multi chapter. This one sets 5 years after the events of MBBD. It will mainly focus on Omelia and Amelia’s relationship with her family, how it affects the dynamics of her marriage to Owen and the repercussions her trouble past has in her life up to this moment. 

Thank you to the lovely @jia911 for proofreading this overnight. You are my team!

 My Boys – Beneath the Surface: Chapter 1

 “I really don’t know how to thank you enough.”

At the sound of the words, Amelia’s mother in law turned around with a sympathetic smile on her face.

“There is no need to thank me, I’ve told you that,” The elderly woman added with a gentle nod, genuinely happy for being able to help. A couple of hours before, Amelia had called her to ask if Evelyn had any idea how to cook Spanish and Moroccan food and Owen’s mother had immediately stepped in to help, driving over to her son’s house to give the neurosurgeon a hand with the cooking.

The school to which Amelia’s kids went to was having an international fair to celebrate cultural diversity and much to Amelia’s dismay each student in the class of her eight year old twins was in charge of taking local food from a few selected countries.  

“If I can’t cook our own food,” Amelia said with a teasing smile, “how do they expect me to cook stuff I’ve never even tried before?”

“Oh, but you’ll love this dish,” Evelyn lightheartedly added, mixing the ingredients next to the stove. She was cooking a Spanish tortilla that consisted basically of eggs and potatoes and seemed very easy to serve. “Owen used to ask me to cook this when he was younger. I am pretty sure we’re going to have to save some for him,” Evelyn turned her head around and looked at her daughter in law with mischief in her eyes, “But don’t worry, I’m making more than enough.”

“I’m glad I’m not the only one who thinks your son eats like he’s been starved for the past year,” Amelia said with good humor. “And by the looks of it, it seems like my sons are just the same.”

Evelyn shared a heartfelt laughter with her daughter in law, clearly enjoying herself. The two women spent the rest of the afternoon in the kitchen, casually talking while Amelia washed the dishes and Evelyn took care of all the cooking.

.

Owen strode around the supermarket, watching as a very excited Megan had a hard time staying still inside the shopping cart.

“Meg, sit down, you’re going to hurt yourself,” Owen said gently but firmly.

The five year old did as told, clearing space among the groceries to finally sit.

“Dad, can we get ice cream for dessert today?” She turned her neck around and used her best puppy eyes to convince him. “But not that strawberry kind that Lucas likes, I want the one he likes the least.”

“Why?” Owen frowned while stopping at the cereal section to load the cart.

“Because,” Megan replied with serene logic. “If you get one he likes he’ll just end up eating everything like he always does.”

Owen let out a loud chuckle and promised Megan they would get enough of whichever flavor she chose. Reaching out for his pocket, he picked up a sheet he’d left hung on the refrigerator earlier that morning. When Owen had said he planned to go out grocery shopping, Amelia had mentioned their twin sons had a school assignment that required some special ingredients and coincidentally, Thomas had asked for a special kind of glue to finish his art project.

As a way of simplifying things, Owen had scribbled “Write down what you need” on a piece of white paper and hung it on the fridge with magnets. Thomas had written his request on it and Owen could also distinguish Lucas’ scrawl asking for sweets and the cereal brand of his preference. The twins had followed adding the list of ingredients their teacher had given them for the recipes they were supposed to take and at last, Owen noticed his wife’s elegant calligraphy as he read the two final words on the list that made him involuntarily laugh: Your smile.

Her unexpected and adorable addition brought a large smile to Owen’s face. Unable to contain a chuckle, he finished getting the items on the list with the always cheerful help of his daughter, hurrying to get back home in time to start preparing dinner.

.

Much to Owen’s surprise, he found his mother already with dinner halfway prepared the minute he made it home.

“Didn’t you say we were going to make paella?” Owen protested, lifting the bag with the ingredients he’d just gone out to get at the same time he stared at his wife questioningly.

“Why make it hard when you can make it so simple?” Evelyn intervened, justifying their change of traditional Spanish dish.

“Your mom said it, not me,” Amelia looked at Owen with a semi apologetic smile, but the amusement was clear in her eyes. It was obvious she agreed with Evelyn.

“I thought you were doing all the cooking for Danny and Robbie’s school thing?” Owen raised both eyebrows as he turned around to face her before putting the fresh ingredients in the fridge.

“Yeah, right,” Amelia’s disbelief was clear on her face as she let out a loud chuckle, clearly having fun. She had pretty much no talent in the kitchen and other than fixing a quick meal of semi cooked pasta or scrambling eggs, there wasn’t much she would venture herself with.

Owen playfully nodded his head in disapproval and carried the leftover bags to the pantry to stock the rest of the groceries. From a distance, he could hear the excited chatter coming from the kitchen and it only got louder when Megan joined in, excitedly stepping in when her grandmother asked if she wanted to help with the cooking. Something his daughter did made the two women crack up and Owen distinguished the sound of Amelia’s musical laughter vibrating in the air.

The trauma surgeon couldn’t contain a smile once he realized that the three most important women of his life were obviously enjoying each other’s company.  Over a decade before, when he’d married Amelia, it didn’t take her long to develop a close relationship with his mother. Years later, she had also come to perform a surgery that saved Evelyn’s life, tightening the bond between the two. The fact that Megan had been born that same week had only helped to bring the two women together and include the little girl in their special attachment.

Owen knew that his wife didn’t have a close relationship with her family and that they didn’t see each other much. He had always been close to his parents, developing an ever closer relationship to his mother and sister after his father had passed away. And then for a while, it had been just him and Evelyn. Owen regretted the years he’d spent neglecting his mother after being so damaged by the traumas in the war but even without meaning to, Amelia had helped him regain proximity with his mother.

Right after he’d married her, she and Evelyn had hit it off pretty quickly and in his mom, Amelia found a very caring and affectionate mother figure. When their first son was born, Evelyn had been of great help caring for the baby and the routine repeated itself every time they added a new member to the family or when the kids were on school break. Owen had long ago stopped being surprised when he came home and found his wife in the company of his mother. Even though sometimes he would accuse them of ganging up on him, Owen never really meant it because he knew that deep down, it was lovely how close the two of them had become.

Strained relationships between mother in laws and wives were very cliché and he was happy that over the years Amelia had once again grown to organically break all the expectations, uniting with Evelyn over the common love they shared for Owen and the kids, instead of unconsciously competing over it. To Owen, it just proved how kindhearted and mature his wife had become. She openly admitted how grateful she was for getting the chance to build their own happy, functional family and he knew that not a day went by when Amelia took it for granted. Her attitude was not only inspiring, it was contaminating, and Owen felt just as lucky to be able to live the dream they’d been through so much to create.

Evelyn stayed for dinner and for the rest of the night, Owen kept busy helping out Thomas with his art project. Unlike his father, the eleven year old was very talented in detailed manual work and even though Thomas could skillfully craft the miniature house he was building with wood sticks, it really helped to have his father applying glue to the assemble as he did it.

“Remind me why you’re building pillars?” Owen frowned, seeing the two story house take formation. Thomas' assignment was to craft a miniature house but unsurprisingly, his son hadn’t settled for creating something simple, choosing to add more walls and a second pavement to the project instead.

“Because Kate said hers would be better but it won’t,” Thomas replied with an ambitious grin. “So I am building a model of our house to prove her wrong.”

Owen chuckled and ruffled Tom’s hair, playfully shaking his head in denial. Thomas had always been good friends with Jo and Alex’s oldest child and they were always friendly fighting for the top of their class. As long as they kept the competitiveness on a healthy level, Owen thought it was a good thing the two kids stimulated each other to do better.

After another twenty minutes, Thomas finally decided they’d done enough and Owen could at last relax after a full day. He kissed Thomas goodnight and checked in on Lucas, who was already in his room watching television. Imagining the youngest kids were already in bed, Owen made his way to his bedroom, eager to finish the day in the company of his wife.

Even though Owen didn’t regret it one bit, having five young kids was a handful of work and at times, he wondered how they were able to manage. Among school projects, homework, extracurricular and sports activities and leisure time, he didn’t remember the last five minutes of peace he’d had. Things like reading the newspaper in the morning or sleeping in on weekends had become a luxury. Despite the full day, it was still relatively early so Owen smiled to himself, imagining that maybe that night, Amelia would be up for staying up late for a very good cause. He couldn’t remember the last time they’d had more than ten minutes to themselves and the idea of being alone with her made Owen anxiously stride to their room.

He was already thinking of ways to slowly undress his wife when, after he crossed the door to his room, his dirty smile vanished the moment Owen saw his bed had been taken over.

Amelia was already lying there as he’d imagined, but she wasn’t alone. Robbie peacefully slept lying between his mother’s legs with his head resting on her lap, while Megan and Danny were still wide awake, watching a children’s movie on the television.

“You guys are still up,” Owen tried to control his disappointment.

Amelia’s eyes met his and he could swear she smiled mischievously, as knowing exactly what was going on in her husband’s head.

“Yes, but it’s past their bedtime,” Amelia informed the kids, playfully squeezing Megan’s nose when the little girl protested.

“Can’t we at least finish the movie, mom?” Danny bargained with adorable begging eyes.

“Nope,” Amelia replied decisively. “It’ll run for at least another hour and you guys have watched it way too many times,” she added, gently shifting on the bed trying not to wake up Robbie. “Give me a kiss goodnight.”

Danny promptly did as told, being closely followed by Megan. But when Amelia handed Robbie over to Owen, he heard the little girl asking:

“Mom, can I sleep here tonight?” She skillfully made her way beneath the covers. “Please?”

Amelia once again made eye contact with her husband and saw the shadow of physical pain behind the blue of his eyes. She wanted to laugh but tried her hardest not to.

“Can she, dad?” Amelia provoked looking up to her husband, knowing very well that even though Owen really wanted the kids in their beds as soon as possible, he would hardly say no to such a sweet request from his daughter.

“Yes,” Owen dryly replied. When Megan excitedly celebrated, not for the first time he felt guilty for wishing that for at least twenty minutes a day, they got a break from the kids. Truth is, he loved them too much to even consider being without them.

The trauma surgeon took the twins to their rooms and tucked them in. Upon his return, Amelia and Megan were already lying beneath the covers with the lights off. Letting out a conformed sigh, Owen went to bed too, feeling his daughter’s arms instantly wrapping around his neck, clinging to him as she stole all space available.

He closed his eyes and let out an amused sigh through his nose, involuntarily laughing at his own predicament. Very gently, Owen turned to his side and placed the little girl on the mattress, seeing she was already too deeply asleep to wake up with the movement.

“Do you want to take her to her room?” Amelia whispered in the dark.

Owen propped his head on his elbow and stared at his sleeping child. She looked like a little angel.

“Nah,” He replied, pulling the covers to make sure she wasn’t cold.

Even though it was dark, Amelia noticed the mesmerized look on her husband’s face as he stared at their daughter. Megan really was adorable and just like her brothers, at the end of the day, gave all meaning to their lives.

“You want to have sex, don’t you?” Amelia provoked her husband, muffling her laughter at his startled expression.

“Shhh!” Owen censored her for using the word, childishly covering Megan’s ear with his hand.

“She is asleep,” Amelia justified, leaning over their daughter to give the girl a kiss on the head. “She can’t hear us.”

“How do you know?” Owen defensively asked with a whisper.

Amelia playfully rolled her eyes and got comfortable on the bed, feeling her body relax from the intense day. Owen was already half asleep when he heard his wife’s voice resonating in the room again.

“Don’t you ever just look at the kids and wonder what the heck have we done?” Amelia asked with good humor, turning to her side to face her husband.

Owen furrowed his brown heavily, apparently offended with the question.

“Of course not!” He rejected her supposition completely.

Amelia couldn’t help laughing at his outrage.

“You are way too politically correct,” She teased him, reaching out her hand to grab his. “I am not saying this is a permanent feeling, it’s not. I actually feel incredibly guilty when I think that so the thought only lasts for like, two milliseconds,” She confessed. “But come on! You have to admit it… Don’t you just wish they could be locked in Neverland for at least a little while so you could enjoy some quality, worry free moments from time to time?” Amelia asked with sincerity, making Owen lighten up. “I mean, when was the last time you didn’t have to worry about absolutely anything?”

“Before I met you,” Owen replied with mock pretense, clearly provoking her. Amelia’s laughter warmed his heart and he gently rubbed his thumb on her open palm, enjoying her touch. “Nah, I am kidding… I actually can’t remember what it’s like not to worry. I mean,” Owen turned his head to face her. “I thought worrying about my unit in the army would be the biggest responsibility of a lifetime, but then I became Chief of Surgery…” He added with a playful voice. “Then, you happened,” Owen teased her, seeing Amelia scowling at him in response. “And just when I thought my worrying days had reached its limit, I became a dad. It’s like I can’t catch a break.”

“And they just kept coming, right?” Amelia thought out loud.

“The kids?”

“No, the reasons to worry.”

“Oh,” Owen thought about it for a second, realizing how right she was. “Absolutely.”

“But yeah, the kids too, I guess,” Amelia decided with a lighthearted tone, smiling when she met her husband’s eyes in the darkness. The neurosurgeon stayed quiet for long seconds, apparently immersed in deep thought but soon after, Owen heard her voice again. “Do you ever think how it would be if we’d done things differently?”

“What do you mean?” Owen quizzically asked, more interested in the conversation.

“Well, how our lives would be if we didn’t have the kids. Or if we only had one or two like we initially planned.”

“Amelia, you have always said you wanted a lot of kids and so did I.” Owen argued.

“Yeah, but remember how after Tommy we decided to stop?” Amelia asked with a broken voice. “What were we thinking? We were so stupid back then.”

“What?” Owen chuckled at her spontaneous confession.

“Just imagine the insane amount of happiness we would be missing out on if we didn’t have the twins or Megan, or even Tom and Luke.”

“Didn’t you just say you wanted to ship them to Neverland?”

“No,” Amelia frowned, looking deeply offended. “That’s not what I said.”

“Then, what did you say?” Owen raised one eyebrow at her, having fun with how worked up she was getting.

Amelia seemed to ponder his question for a few seconds, processing her answer before opening her mouth to talk.

“I said that even though sometimes I wish I could get a five minute break, I really don’t, you know?” She played with Owen’s index finger between hers, idly staring at the ceiling while lost in thought. “I mean, even though these five brats drive me close to exhaustion nearly every day, I feel like I live and breathe for them. And I absolutely can’t imagine myself being happy without any of you.” Amelia confessed, letting her husband know of the important role he played in her life too.

“Yeah,” Owen agreed, closing his fingers around her hand and bringing it closer to give his wife a gentle kiss on her knuckles. “I feel the exact same way.” He seemed to struggle with his thoughts for a second before finally admitting. “I guess sometimes I do ask myself why we decided to have kids in the first place,” He smiled sheepishly at the confession when their eyes met. “But all it takes is one look at either of them to make me instantly remember and regret my doubts.”

Amelia grinned, happy to realize she wasn’t the only one who felt like that.

“It would be pretty cool to send them to Neverland, though,” She teased, chuckling at her realization. “This way, they’d never have to grow up.”

Owen smiled at her admission and watched as Amelia gently wrapped one arm around Megan, snuggling next to the little girl at the same time she protectively held her.

“Owen?” Amelia’s whisper broke the silence after a few minutes. “Are you sleeping?”

“I am trying to,” He did his best to hide his smile at his teasing reply.

“I spoke to Meredith today,” Amelia shared, letting out a sigh of frustration. “She is not going to the wedding.”

Owen rubbed his eyes, fighting off sleep. He knew that conversation would probably take more than a few minutes.

“Did she say why?”

“Not really,” Amelia replied, playing with a nonexistent loose thread on her pillow case. “I mean, I didn’t expect her to go in the first place anyway but as usual she just made up a sad excuse about work as a way to justify her absence.”

“Well, I can’t say I am surprised.”

In a few weeks, Owen and Amelia were traveling to the East Coast to attend Amelia’s oldest sister’s wedding. A few years before, after visiting Amelia and realizing how unhappy and frozen in time her life was, Nancy had gone back home and turned the table around. A few months later, she had divorced the husband with whom she hadn’t had a real relationship in nearly a decade, gotten closer to her kids and soon after started dating again. Now, a couple of years after meeting someone very special, Nancy was going to remarry and Amelia had planned with months in advance some free time at work so that she and Owen could spend some time in Connecticut for the wedding.

“I told her that we wouldn’t mind taking Zola, Bailey and Ellis,” Amelia confessed, supposing Owen would be on board. “I know Meredith isn’t interested in keeping a relationship with my family but the kids will always be Derek’s and they should be given the chance to spend time there. It’s their family too, after all.”

“Of course,” Owen promptly agreed. “Do they want to go?”

“I didn’t ask them yet,” Amelia confessed. “But I suppose they’ll want to. It’s summer anyway and they’ll be off school. I don’t see why they wouldn’t want to go.”

Owen was too polite to say why he absolutely agreed. Over the years, it wasn’t uncommon that Derek’s three kids came to spend time with them, often having sleepovers. Before Amelia had married him, she used to live in the same house as her nieces and nephew, and the three kids had always felt a special connection with their aunt. But over the years, they’d grown to be left alone for large periods of time while their mom was working extra hours at the hospital.

“Are we really doing this?” Owen let out a sigh of worry. “Traveling across the country with eight kids?”

“Well, Zola is hardly a kid anymore…”

“You know what I mean,” Owen turned his head sideways and looked at his wife above Megan’s head.

“It could be fun,” Amelia tried to sound encouraging.

“Yes, it could,” Owen agreed, giving up adding that it could also be a total disaster.

“Are you going to sleep now?” Amelia asked. Her voice sounded like she was still lost in her own thoughts.

“Yes,” Owen slowly moved up and leaned over Megan, surprising his wife when he gently touched her face with his hand. “By the way, I loved your request on the grocery list today.”

Amelia took a fraction of a second longer than usual to realize what he was talking about and she couldn’t help smiling in response when the memory of her spontaneous addition caught up with her.

“Well, I meant it,” She declared affectionately, feeling Owen’s thumb rubbing on her cheek as he leaned over with full intention to kiss her.

Amelia noticed the sweetness in his eyes as he intensely gazed at her, obviously admiring her features.

“We’re very well off then,” Owen realized before capturing her lips with his own. “Because this is all I need to smile.” He added, recalling her wish.

“A kiss?” Amelia giggled when he buried his face on the curve of her neck, playfully exploring the area with his lips. “Is a kiss really the price of your smile?”

“No,” He raised his head, making eye contact with his wife and seeing the contentment on her face. When Owen replied, his voice sounded firm with determinate conviction before he got back to his side of the bed to finally fall asleep, “For you, they’ll always be free of charge.”

  ---

[artisanalapothecary]

My conservative mother-in-law and her new love of hemp!

Do you get side-eye from your: spouse, coworker, friends, neighbors, parents or (insert any other judgmental person or people you know here) when the subject of marijuana comes up?

If you share your love of all-things-pot in mixed company, are you made to feel like a loser, a criminal, or some lazy “pothead” who is capable only of making poor life choices?

If you are still reading this, my guess is yes. I’m here today to tell you that I’ve been there too. I’m also here to tell you that there is hope! How do I know this? Because I have witnessed a miracle. My conservative, Persian mother-in-law LOVES cannabis!

In today’s society, the winds of change are a blowin’ when it comes to the subject of ”weed”. With the legalization not only of medical marijuana, but recreational marijuana as well, more people are speaking freely about the benefits of using cannabis both medicinally and casually. Until recently, my mother-in-law was NOT one of those people.

Let me give you some background information to set the scene. I will change the names here to protect the innocent. My amazing, loving Middle Eastern mother-in-law, let’s call her Mary Jane, or Mary for short, and I have a wonderful relationship that has spanned more than two decades. That said, we have a little bit of a language barrier. She understands some English, but is shy to speak it. My Farsi (Persian language) is fantastic as long as I keep it to ”Hi, how are you? I’m fine, thank you. It’s warm/cold.” After that, somebody could yell fire and I would reply “It’s cold.” You get the picture. Our communication is either translated by my sweet husband, or my fabulously glamourous sister-in-law (more on her later), or through a series of award-winning charades.

More often than not, Mary and I lose some of our conversational impact through these translations. I suspect my husband, referred to from here on out as “The Hubs”, and my sister-in-law whom we will call Sophia (because everybody she meets tells her she looks like Sophia Loren) cheat and don’t always tell Mary everything I’m saying. This is not due to lack of understanding, or laziness. This is for my own protection. If Mary knew everything I’m saying, she would be very concerned for her only son because he is married to a crazy person.

Mary eats only very healthy food that she prepares herself. She does not drink alcohol, use tobacco, or use prescription medication. I‘ve never even seen her take an ibuprofen. Mary exercises every day, and takes all of her vitamins. I’m not going to share with you Mary’s age, because even though we have changed her name here, she will murder me. I will say she has not reached the age of eighty yet, but you could torture me with shredded coconut and Keeping Up With the Kardashians reruns and I still wouldn’t give up the goods.

In addition to adhering to this strict regimen to care for her aging body, Mary also adheres to an unwavering loyalty to conservative thoughts and behaviors. Loosely translated, she is a bit of a worrywart. And I mean that in the best way possible. If there is a loose screw on the floor, hours will be spent wondering and searching for its origin, in the event the house might fall down if not replaced. If a missed phone call is not returned immediately, subsequent phone calls to all people and possible locales are placed until the recipient is tracked down to:

1. Make sure all parties are safe, and not lying in a ditch somewhere.

2. Ensure that said parties have been fed properly.

3. Offer lunch at the house - even if we’ve already eaten. Twenty minutes ago. Really, we’re not hungry. What? Oh yes, we’ll drive to the house immediately to pick up homemade Persian food for later, thank you!

Mary is of the mindset that all rules must be strictly adhered to, particularly when it comes to the government. There is no black and white when it comes to obeying the law. We have established that Mary is a worrywart, so you can imagine the stress it caused her to learn that her favorite (only) daughter-in-law had started a cannabis-based business. Yep, we told Mary that I’m into pot.

Who explained to Mary details about the new CBD-infused bath product line I created with my friend and business partner? The Hubs and Sophia of course! Prior to the unveiling of this information, I was quite nervous. The Hubs, Sophia and I discussed at length our plan of action and just how to break the news without breaking Mary’s heart. The first step was to explain exactly what the products are, and what makes them so great. After explaining the benefits of absorbing CBD through the skin, we had to attack the legality of the situation. CBD is legal folks! More on that subject here.

Lastly, moral implications had to be addressed. After convincing Mary that customers would not be going to jail for buying our products, and that I would not be going to jail for making them, and that The Hubs would not be going to jail for be married to a drug lord, it was challenging to reassure her that I was not taking the first steps on a path leading directly to drug addiction and homelessness. You see, CBD does not get you high. THC, the other stuff found in marijuana gives users the psychotropic effect of being “high.” And there is NO THC in any of our products.

What was the final tactic used to convince Mary that we are on to something good? We asked her to try some of the merch. As well as Mary takes care of herself, she does suffer from ailments that you would expect a not-yet-eighty-year-old person to experience. Muscle pain, joint pain, insomnia, digestive issues, anxiety...just to name a few. You know what CBD is good for? Alleviating muscle pain, joint pain, insomnia, digestive issues, anxiety...just to name a few.

So we started with Bath Crack CBD Bath Salts. Sophia oversaw the project by drawing the bath, adding the Bath Crack and keeping Mary in the tub long enough so as to experience the benefits of the CBD. The result? Epic fail. Poor Mary who is not a bath-taker just could not relax and enjoy. Getting in and out of the tub is no fun, and once she was in, it was uncomfortable for her. Ok, back to the drawing board. How could we share with Mary the amazing experience of CBD?

Vaping was completely out of the question (Have you lost your mind?) and with a very sensitive tummy, we did not think that oral consumption was the right decision either. Think, think, think…and bingo. We have to make a lotion that Mary can use. So came the birth of CBD Whipped Body Butter.

It took us some time to finally come up with the right formulation. Not too greasy, not too runny, scent had to be just right (Amber Oil and Orange Blossom, yummy) and of course, we had to get the right amount of CBD into the jar. Once we got the consistency, the aromatherapy and the potency right, it was time to roll out the ultimate test: the Mary test.

We gave Mary a jar and asked her to rub some on any part of her body that hurt. She started with a little around her neck and shoulder area. She loved the scent! A few minutes later she rubbed a little more. Wow, starting to feel good and pain feels like it is lessening. Let’s rub some more…in more places. This is great for the back too! And hands, and feet, and arms, and legs and so on and so forth. Thirty minutes later, Sophia is gently reminding Mary that a little bit goes a long way. An hour later, Sophia is wrestling the jar away telling Mary that she should probably save some for later.

That incident was three weeks ago. Since then, we have not seen Mary without her jar of CBD Whipped Body Butter in her hand. She is either using it on herself, or any unsuspecting victim within reach. She loves the relaxing qualities of CBD and aromatherapy in addition to alleviating her pain. Mary has several siblings residing all over the world. She calls them daily to rave about how much she loves the product and how proud she is of her favorite (only) daughter-in-law. She has spread the word to all of her friends, and may have tried to strike up a conversation in a grocery store line about it.

So there you have it dear reader, the story of how this girl and her family introduced pot to Mary Jane.

When faced with cannabis skepticism, honest and clear communication is most effective. Understand that age, cultural background and upbringing all affect a person’s outlook on certain subjects. Love and patience are the keys to bringing awareness to all facets of hot-button topics such as cannabis, or politics, or the ongoing dispute of over/under for the TP roll. Actually, no discussion needed for TP – over, ALWAYS over. Under should be a punishable offense.

Do you have more questions about CBD? Check this blog for frequent posts, or check out the Home and FAQ pages of our website for more information. Wanna get your hands on some Bath Crack Bath Salts or CBD Whipped Body Butter? Buy direct here.

[tune-collective]

Quincy Jones III on Bringing Hip-Hop & Health Together for Upcoming Netflix Documentary 'Feel Rich'

Quincy Jones III on Bringing Hip-Hop & Health Together for Upcoming Netflix Documentary 'Feel Rich'

Since he was a rug rat, Quincy Jones III — the producer and entrepreneur, who is also son to music icon Quincy Jones — has led a healthy lifestyle. His mother, Ulla Jones, would detail all the nutrients in every ingredient her son ate and only let him have ice cream if he chugged a carrot juice beforehand.

Now, the founder of production company QD3 Entertainment (responsible for hip-hop documentaries like 2011’s Beef: Behind The Bullet and other titles about Tupac and Lil Wayne, among others) is extending his lifelong discipline to spotlight the healthy habits of hip-hop and basketball greats.

Feel Rich Inc., the multimedia health and wellness platform where Jones III serves as CCO alongside CEO/co-founder Shawn Ullman, is readying their upcoming documentary Feel Rich: Health is the New Wealth debuting on Netflix next month. Fat Joe, Slim Thug, Common, Styles P, Paul Wall and wife Crystal Wall, as well as Metta World Peace appear in the film, opening up about their personal journey to wellness and offering a look into their exercise regimen and clean diets. 

“Hip-hop is helping to get the country healthy,” Ullman tells us. “I’m excited that Feel Rich was able to document the urban wellness movement that is spreading across the country to put a spotlight on this growing movement. Quincy and I hope that this film inspires more people to start living a healthier life and to motivate young entrepreneurs to create health and wellness businesses in the community.” 

Slim Thug harps on that note of maintaining a healthy lifestyle. “If I’m going to call myself a hustler and live my best life, then it’s important that i take care of myself,” the rapper says.

Milton Harris, HUSLfit CEO and Slim Thug’s trainer, adds, “The documentary is important to me because it hits so close to home. I’ve lost my dad as well as uncles to diseases that could’ve been prevented just by living a healthy lifestyle. I’m excited that Feel Rich was able to capture our movement in Houston and included us in this important documentary.”

Below, catch an exclusive clip from the Feel Rich documentary followed by a Q&A with Jones III on how he hopes the project will remix perspectives on hip-hop’s relationship with health and wellness. 

How did health and wellness become a part of your everyday life?

My mom was a vegetarian and my father practiced yoga so, between the two of them, I was introduced to holistic health pretty early on in life. When my mom used to cook, she would always tell me what was in each ingredient — in the broccoli, you get a lot of Vitamin C — so I was always very conscious of that. And later in life, when I was five or six, whenever I wanted ice cream, she would make me drink carrot juice before I had the ice cream. It conditioned me so it’s always been a part of my life. Even when I came into hip-hop when I had a production company and was working with Tupac and everybody, I would always bring carrot juice and health products to the studio so it’s always been something that I’ve been passionate about sharing with my friends as well.

Did your healthy habits rub off on the people that you worked with in hip-hop? I can imagine Tupac chugging carrot juice.

[Laughs] In some instances, it did. I would always bring healthier foods to the studio and at times, I would bring Tupac food as well. So, definitely.

How did you meet Shawn Ullman, CEO of Feel Rich?

I met Shawn Ullman when I had my production company, QD3 Entertainment, where we did a lot of music documentaries about artists like Tupac, Lil Wayne and so forth. So we worked together on a bunch of deals back in the day — he was doing business development for my company so that’s how we connected. That was probably back in 2004, 2005.

How was Feel Rich born? 

Both of us felt like we wanted to do something that was positive and we saw the influence that people like Jay Z and 50 Cent had when they’d wear a T-shirt in a music video, then the next day — without telling anybody to buy it — kids would go on eBay to find the t-shirts; their influence is huge. We were like, how can we use that influence in a more meaningful way? So that’s kind of how the Feel Rich concept came about. And it’s also named after Shawn’s parents, Phyllis and Richard.

Why did you want to spotlight hip-hop’s relationship with health and wellness?

When you look into urban communities like Compton and Watts and the Bronx and so forth, over 50 percent of those kids are raised by single mothers. I think that rappers take on an exaggerated role because a lot of kids look to them for cues on how to be a man. In their father’s absence, rappers take on this huge role. With that influence, we can make huge change if we’re talking about the right topics. If somebody like The Game is talking about drinking carrot juice or taking care of themselves in the health sense, I think that’s gonna carry a lot of weight with the young males that need that message — they’ll look to him for that type of advice. I’ve been working with rappers my whole life and what blew me away with this documentary, you’re having 10 or 15 of the most prominent people in the game talking about the same thing, which is health and how much it means to them. 

What surprised you the most about the people you worked with for this documentary?

I think what surprised me the most was how engaged they were. There was one time where we were sitting with [basketball star] Metta World Peace and he was like I got 20 minutes so we gotta do this quick. As soon as we started talking about meditation and yoga, he canceled his next meeting because he was so passionate about it. The thing I think people don’t realize is behind closed doors, these guys are hyper-passionate about it but it’s very rare to get asked to talk about it. We wanted to be a platform where this is the focus. People see the music videos and I think it’s misleading because behind closed doors, they’re not drinking 40s all day long — they’re drinking carrot juice, fasting and running and taking care of their bodies, so we just want to show that so people can take after that as well.

How did you discover rappers’ healthy habits?

It’s funny because a lot of my positive mentors in my life, people that got me into reading books and becoming healthier was rappers. Ice Cube was a very positive influence on me, LL Cool J was big in exercising and made me healthy, and they made a huge impact on my life, so I kind of wanted to turn it around and give it to the public.

What was the best piece of fitness advice that they gave you?

That it’s easy. It’s not that hard, as long as you’re mindful of it. Fat Joe lost 120 pounds or something like that by just starting to walk and cutting like one or two ingredients out of his food. He stopped ordering starch and just started walking and that alone changed his physique in a big way. He had never been a really healthy person and then a lot of his friends were passing away, like Big Pun, from being obese and he decided he wanted to be around for his kids and change his lifestyle. Now, when you talk to Fat Joe, he’s like the beacon of health. He sounds like an expert — he’s talking about calories and knows every aspect of it. These guys have really soaked it all up and they’re the perfect mouthpiece for the message.

Why was it important to you to show your own father, Quincy Jones’ health struggles in the documentary?

People think that in order to eat healthy and to think about your health, you have to be wealthy and have access to things that maybe the average man or woman doesn’t. Having my dad in there saying what everybody else is saying, it’s a human struggle. Preventive health, in most cases, is free and cheaper than what they’re doing now. There’s a big misconception that it’s more expensive to eat healthy. If you look in the stores, the cheapest items are the raw vegetables. You can get a bundle of kale for a dollar and it’s organic at Whole Foods but you can’t get any meat item for a dollar. We just wanted to dispel the myth going in both directions.

What do you hope viewers, especially those who may not be living their healthiest lives, take away from the film?

For two years, we went all over America and explored health as it relates to the urban community. And I think the biggest takeaway that I would hope people get from this is that at the end of the film, the light bulb goes off [and viewers think] this is a lot easier than they thought and they’re inspired to do this because they can relate to something they see in the movie. That they realize like this is something they never thought about consciously, but now that they see all these people talking about — they can try it and it actually feels obtainable.

That’s pretty much the message you walk away with: You realize that if you’re conscious of your health and you know a few basic rules about about how healthy eating works, it’s very easy, it’s very simple and it doesn’t take as much as people think. I think a lot of people are intimidated by the process of becoming healthier when they really shouldn’t be. If it’s anything they should take away, it’s that and that it’s okay to love and take care of yourself. I think people get the wrong impression when they see rappers in their music videos and they’re not necessarily talking about these topics so putting it all in one film is going to have a big effect. 

Feel Rich: Health is the New Wealth drops on Netflix of May 23. 

This article originally appeared on Billboard.

http://tunecollective.com/2017/04/22/quincy-jones-iii-bringing-hip-hop-health-together-upcoming-netflix-documentary-feel-rich/

[kareina]

Before the Dawn

royallyalexandre:

He shouldn’t have been surprised that she had feared his reaction if she had had a daughter but he was, simply because he had thought they were past that. Alexandre wasn’t obsessed with heirs like his father, or his grandfather, or the kings before him. A son would have been preferable, however, Alexandre simply wanted a child. He had known that he wanted to be a father and the sex of said child didn’t matter. Even if he didn’t know what he was doing, even if he had had the worst father in the world Alexandre was determined not to allow that to affect his son. Apparently Karina was thinking along the same lines, another thing he wasn’t fazed about. They were both in this together, both had the same concerns. Both now had a child to love and protect and despite all of their own personal problems they had to do whatever was necessary to not project them upon Matthias.

Alexandre could relate, to not being told that someone was proud of him. One would think for the King of France, but all he had received on his father’s end was disappointment in him. With his shoulder pressed to her own Alexandre turned his gaze from his son to his wife, watching in silence while she explained her fears, similar to his own. It was unlike Karina to be so vulnerable with him, but, then again, it was unlike him to return the favor. Perhaps the birth of their child would change them, the ‘relationship’ that they had set with each other after almost a tumultuous year of marriage. “I think that it’s natural to be afraid,” he quietly admitted, not truly knowing where he was going with his line of reasoning. But once he began, it all seemed to pour out. “You once told me that I’m not my father, just like you aren’t your mother. Already I know that, just from how you love him.” Not Alexandre, of course, but that was a peace he had already made. “That’s all that we can do. Give him the best life imaginable – keep him happy, and healthy, and safe. One day he will become his own person and all that we can wish for is that he is good.” Unlike his own father. Alexandre averted her gaze, focusing instead on the child. “I promise you that I’ll do everything in my power to protect him and make him happy. It’ll be my life’s work.”

She didn’t know why she was confessing her deepest thoughts to him. It was true that they’d had several arguments about wanting to be able to talk to each other, to be able to open up to one another without the fear of said words being used against them. One part of her knew that Alexandre knew enough now to destroy her and her family, with what he’d discovered throughout this past year they’d been married. She also knew she was at a disadvantage, because even though he knew her damning secret and now one of her fears, she still was no closer to knowing anything about him. Karina had been patient so far, given that her behavior at the beginning of their marriage didn’t warrant opening up to, but it was only a matter of time before her patience thinned. There were things about him she didn’t understand, parts of his past that were still murky, especially surrounding the circumstances of his mother’s death. But she was willing to wait, knowing that it was a sensitive subject for her husband.

There was something else she knew, something that surpassed every threat he posed to her. She knew that she loved him, and that in some way he cared about her. He’d gone so far as to admit it even, the words ‘I feel deeply for you’ still fresh in her mind as they were the day he’d said them. That was enough for her, enough to know that she could trust him enough to talk to him, especially when they were in this together. Karina nodded, noting how he’d averted his gaze. “You’re right. I suppose all we can do is have faith.” She would trust that they could do it together, as they had begun to work together when it came to ruling France. Slowly their people were beginning to trust them, and the members of the court were beginning to hold them in high esteem, surely they could learn how to be good parents.

She smiled, sitting up and motioning to him to transfer Matthias over into her arms. “That’s a good promise,” she said with a grin, hoping to lighten the mood. “I promise to be the best mother I can be. And I promise I won’t throw you out of bed when the baby starts to cry,” she paused. “Well, I might sometimes. But I’ll try not to.”