#something is lost in that yknow. same when you leave out the tone of the words

[time-slink]

when youre captioning and somebody says a number, how do you write it? bc when writing, you do 'one' 'two' etc up to ten and then 11, 12, etc. but what happens when someone says 'fifty-two hundred' out loud? do you write 5,200? then you've lost a tiny bit of information

[a-kaash-me-outside]

not fair - ch5

in which your boyfriend is perfect in every single way... except for one and kei can't just sit back and watch you suffer...

previous | ch5 | next (coming soon) [masterlist]

// "don’t question me again or i’ll leave." ~ ᴛsᴜᴋɪsʜɪᴍᴀ ᴋᴇɪ x ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ x ʏᴀᴍᴀɢᴜᴄʜɪ ᴛᴀᴅᴀsʜɪ ~ 8656 ᴡᴏʀᴅs

a look into this chapter/tw: 18+ minors dni super nfsw!, cheating (seriously, major plot point), threesome, vouyerism, size kink, weird feelings, use of character first names, degradation, oral f!receive, dom/sub undertones, coming untouched, stop light system, dirty talk, name calling, coming twice, plot-heavy, pegging, cross posted from ao3, afab reader she/her pronouns

join my taglist here!! ~~ (one more chapter left?!?!?!) ♡ ʀᴇʙʟᴏɢs ᴀɴᴅ ɪɴᴛᴇʀᴀᴄᴛɪᴏɴs ᴍᴇᴀɴ ᴛʜᴇ ᴡᴏʀʟᴅ ♡

It’s one of those phone calls that you hope goes to voicemail. 

Hey, Tadashi, just wanted to let you know that Kei and I were coming to get the car and boxes tomorrow. Sorry it’s been there for so long. That’s all it had to be. You’re repeating it in your head, waiting for the polite message and tone to come. 

It doesn’t.

You don’t remember what Tadashi says when he answers the phone, don’t even know if he said anything at all. You pull the phone away from your ear, making sure that he didn’t answer and hang up or that the space between the rings isn’t just skipping. The numbers are counting up, seemingly slower than seconds typically pass by. 

“Hey, Tadashi,” you start. You should have practiced or wrote a script or something, because any words, phrases, questions in your mind are gone now, leaving Tadashi to pick up the pieces once again.

If it weren’t for the tiny breath from the otherside of the phone, you might’ve hung up waiting for a response. He mutters your name first, practically lost by the hestiance and heaviness of the word. “Are you calling about coming to pick up your car?”

“Right, yea, I’m so sorry we left it there and haven’t, uh, been back to get it. We kinda just wanted to give you time because of everything and didn’t want to, yknow, rush anything or give you any trouble or-” you’re rambling on, nervous to stop. Kei rests his hand on your lower back just to let you know that he’s there. 

“It’s fine, really, just, are you guys coming to pick it up?” he asks, interrupting your nervous spiel.

“Yes,” you reply, knowing that you have so much more to say, but not ready to say any of it. After being so intimate with him and Kei, you’d think that it would be easier to talk, like everything’s already been out on the table. It’s not until Kei raises his eyebrows, lets his thumb graze under your shirt and against your skin that you actually get the words out. “Do you think we could come in, too?”

Tadashi isn’t stupid. He has to know what you’re implying or, at the very least, know that the two of you want to talk with him. Kei is staring at you, the room is dead silent, and every second that Tadashi doesn’t answer is more confirmation that you’ve just made a fool of yourself. 

You’re about to take it back, to backpedal without remorse in an attempt to salvage civility, but Tadashi clears his throat, unknowingly interrupting you. “Yeah, that would be okay.” 

Almost too stunned to speak, you’re sure that the surprise was written across your face. “O-Okay, yeah.” It’s heavy in your throat, banging at the back of your teeth, you want to ask, clarify, make sure that you’re on the same page, but you also feel like you should quit while you’re ahead. Kei’s confusion turns to understanding when you give him a wide-eyed, short nod. 

“Alright,” Tadashi replies, but still doesn’t hang up. 

Tsukishima doesn’t grab the phone from you, but he talks loud enough for his voice to make it through the receiver. “Like last time?” 

“Like last time,” Tadashi confirms quickly. “I’ve gotta go, but I’ll see you guys tomorrow, yeah?”

“Yeah, for sure, see you then,” you reply, “Looking forward to it, Dashi.” You can faintly hear the hitch in his breath followed by the low clear of his throat. 

“Me too.” Click.

You bring the phone down from your ear. The weight on your chest isn’t as unbearable with the assumptions off the table. There’s still a lingering force quickening your heartbeat, but at least you can breathe for now. 

“Thanks,” you say, looking up at Kei.

He shrugs. “That’s what I’m here for, bluntness.”

“And doing the hard things that I can’t,” you scoff. 

He bends down, pressing a kiss onto your forehead and pushing your hair out of your face. “Definitely not all the time. It’s probably like half and half,” Kei says and then tilts his head, “Mm, maybe 60/40.”

You nod, “Yeah, but that seems pretty fair to me.” You pull back, wiping your palms on your pants. “I should bring the thing, right?”

“Why else did we buy it?”

“No, I know, I guess I’m just nervous,” you admit.

“No reason to be. You’ll be great and Tadashi will love it, you know that,” Kei reassures you. 

In theory, you did know that. If you really thought about it, you knew that. The evidence backs it up, the reciprocation in excitement backs it up, and yet you can’t help but doubt the ideas that have been swarming your head since that night. 

The entire walk to Tadashi’s feels heavy, steps dragging, bag weighted, Kei’s hand in yours evident. So many thoughts are taking place in your head. You try to rid them, but you can’t. The conversation from that night is on repeat in your mind. Maybe it’s a good thing, maybe it’ll make you more decisive, maybe the repetition will hammer in these clouded thoughts. 

You thought that the first time coming back felt weird, but coming back the second time comes with a mix of eerie comfort and looming taboo. 

It’s a blur, really, Tadashi answering the door, inviting you inside. You remember the small things like taking off your shoes and placing them neatly next to the spot that you used to every single day and when you shake your head no at Tadashi politely asking if you want a glass of water or cup of tea. The rest of it is lost, second to the anticipation and the thought in the back of your mind to book it out the front door.

You are sitting on the couch. Kei is sitting next to you. Somehow everything in your head is talking at once and they’re your thoughts, but you can’t make out a single one. 

You want to just skip to the part of the night that doesn’t feel like this anymore - fidgeting just to calm your nerves, the three of you sitting in a small circle like a meeting with stale coffee, no eye contact, barely allowing yourself to breathe. Kei’s hand hovers over to yours, slowly, trying not to bring attention to itself, not for his sake or even Tadashi’s, but for yours. His grasp wraps around your fidgeting fingers, his intertwining with yours like they were meant to be there. 

In a matter of seconds, you catch Tadashi’s eyes as they flicker from the intertwined hands in your lap to your eyes back to your hands and then down at his own. You can’t get a long enough look at his face to see the emotion, but you don’t really need a long look to tell you that Tadashi is feeling more nervous than you are now, as if that’s even possible.

How hard would this have been without Kei sitting here right next to you? Without Kei throughout this entire process? Tadashi doesn’t have that, doesn’t get the sweet hand hold or the supportive presence. He deserves it, though. 

You take the first step, hands shaking, breath unsteady as you stand up and move towards Tadashi. You don’t know what to say once you are right in front of him, so you opt for silence. Instead, you take this time to regulate your breathing and focus on the emotions in Tadashi’s face that you couldn’t find before.

All of the doubt that you had last night (and a few seconds ago, for that matter) is fading away. Now that he’s sitting here in front of you, now that you can see the soft features on his face, can feel Kei’s assuring presence behind you, can watch the way that Tadashi waits for your next sentence, patient and attentive. Your hand moves slowly as you reach to cup Tadashi’s face, directing his attention and testing the waters. 

Banging against your sternum, your heart feels like it’s going to burst out of your chest. It doesn’t calm on contact or when Tadashi leans into the touch ever so slightly and it gets much worse when the words tumble out of your mouth. You can’t help them, seeing how pretty Tadashi looks in front of you, getting flashbacks from last week, remembering how good he was for you.

“Can I kiss you?”

You don't know if this sentence takes Kei by surprise, don’t dare to look back or show an ounce of hesitation in front of Tadashi. Besides, at this moment, you’re more concerned about Tadashi, the way you can see the emotions clearly now, but you still can’t read them very well for the sake of how fast they’re changing. But you can read the nod, though slight, of Tadashi’s head after a beat of contemplation. 

The kiss is sweet, warm. You have to bend down a bit more than you’re anticipating, but that only means you get to tilt his head up, bring his lips closer to yours, thumb gently pushing on the underside of his chin, fingers resting against his neck in a way that you can feel his harsh swallow as soon as you pull away. His eyes are wide, struck with something bordering wonderment, and you are drinking it in. 

This has to be exactly what Kei felt like on the night that started it all. 

There’s a surge of confidence for the first time since your last visit, like it’s no longer testing the waters, because you know exactly why the three of you are here. You’re not sure that Tadashi knows, but somehow that makes you feel even more assured, like he’s depending on you to guide him through the night. 

And it really does feel like history repeating itself.

Still, it doesn’t matter how much you see yourself in Tadashi right now and how that means that if he is you then you would be Kei and how you know that if Kei were standing where you’re standing right now, things would unfold a lot differently. Despite the lingering pressure of this new role you’re embodying, you have to ask.

It comes out sweet, warm like the kiss you shared moments ago. “You’re okay with all of this?”

Tadashi’s nod is a touch more certain than the previous, but you follow it up nonetheless. “And it’s alright that I don’t keep asking if it’s alright?” you ask. He nods again. “If something is getting too much or you’re starting to feel uncomfortable, just say yellow.” God, saying it aloud brings you back. You remember that Kei had started touching you, kissing you at this point, but all you want to do is stare at Tadashi, see the understanding and attention. “If something is too much and you want to stop immediately, then say red and we’ll stop, make sure you’re okay.” 

He nods again, but not one curt nod like the rest of them, more desperate, repetitive, like he wants you to stop talking, not because he doesn’t care, but because he knows what’s ahead and he wants it to come faster. You give in, moving your hand down his shoulder, leaning in to press your lips against his ear. “If you can’t breathe, mouth full, can’t verbally communicate, just 3 nice hard taps against me or Kei and we’ll stop.”

A whimper slips out from between his teeth in lieu of a nod, but you want to hear it in stumbling confirmation. “Understand?” mhm “Say it. Need to hear you say it, Dashi.” 

“Yea- I mean, yea, yes. I understand.”

You stand up straight, towering over top of Tadashi. “I’m in control tonight.” You’re not sure how Kei looks behind you, taller than you, you know that, but you wonder if his height makes you look less in control than you feel. You wonder if his facial expression is making Tadashi doubt your dominance over the situation. You didn’t really talk about this, Kei and you, not in detail, not about power dynamics. Truthfully, if you had, you’re not sure you would be in this position right now.

It’s comfortable for you to be right between Kei and Tadashi in the order of power, but to declare that you’re in control, not just of Tadashi, but just in general, it’s stepping out of your comfort zone. 

“Y-You?” Tadashi asks innocently enough, eyes flitting from you to just behind you where you know that Kei is standing. Part of you, the safe part, wants to quiet down, wait for Kei to answer for you, to either protect you or scoff at the notion. That part of you doesn’t win. 

Rather, you bend down again, eyes level with Tadashi’s. “If that’s a problem, I can leave instead.”

“No, it’s not- I’m not- I didn’t- I’m sorry!” he starts immediately.

“Don’t question me again or I’ll leave,” you repeat. 

“I won’t. I won’t.” Tadashi says, not a promise, but you believe it like one. 

You turn around, look up at Kei. There’s still that voice inside of you looking for his permission, for his approval. You don’t think that will ever go away. This little voice inside of you comes through in the form of a silent question. If it were anyone else on the receiving end you’d think it’d get lost in translation. Am I doing okay?

“What do you want me to do?” Kei asks plainly, unwavering, like it’s not completely left field for him to be asking you for direction. It’s the perfect answer to your question. 

You’re not exactly sure how you’re going to get through this night. You’re exhausted already and you haven’t even really given a command yet. You figure, however, that the best mantra to get you through the night is to just continue to ask for things that you really want. What do you want him to do? 

You go with your first instinct and though your voice isn’t as strong as you want it to be, it feels good leaving your mouth. “I want you to carry me upstairs, want Tadashi to follow. And I want to be placed nicely on the bed.”

Kei moves immediately, hoisting you up and letting you wrap your arms around his neck. There’s no hesitance to just doing what he’s told. You assume, for now at least, that it’s because the tasks aren’t too demanding or degrading. You’ll be waiting for backlash for the rest of the night. 

You don’t have to direct any of the demands to Tadashi. He hears you and he listens, waiting just enough time to give you a breath of space and then following you like a puppy. By the time Tadashi enters the room, Kei is placing you, exactly as you asked, nice and gentle on the bed. 

It’s so much different than normal. Kei is always attentive, always makes sure that you’re taken care of, but it’s so different . His hands follow your body as he lies you down, making sure that there is a cushion of his palm between each inch and the bed as it comes in contact. God, you wish you could feel it on your skin. 

“Am I allowed to kiss you?” Kei asks. You can’t detect any amount of snide smirk or tone, have to take it as sincere despite months and months of experiences screaming in your head. Your stomach is in knots and you want to say yes just because he asked, but making him wait feels like it’ll have a better payoff in the end. 

“Not yet,” you say, low like a whisper. It’s not loud enough for Tadashi to hear, not meant to show your dominance or prove yourself. It’s a moment just for you and Kei. His eyebrows raise and then furrow, a remark starts to bubble, but he shuts it down before it reaches his throat. You don’t know where Tadashi is, but you don’t care either. You’re following your wants, pushing your fingertips through Kei’s blonde locks and making soft fists. “I want you to want it more.”

You let go quickly, as soon as it’s about to elicit a response, and then you press on his shoulders with the heel of your palm, digging your fingernails into the tops just hard enough for him to really feel it . As soon as he’s stood up, standing at the foot of the bed, so familiarly over top of you, you ask, “Aren’t you going to ask me what else I want?”

He swallows the alternative response and asks just that, “What do you want now, (y/n)?”

You hook your fingers into your waistband. Both Kei’s and Tadashi’s eyes follow the movement as you push your shorts and panties down to your ankles. They’re still dangling off of one of your ankles after you maneuver one foot out of one side, spreading your legs apart and realizing just how bold you’re being tonight. 

You hadn’t realized, though, how wet you had gotten from just a few small actions. It was a mix of the newfound control and the way that they were both listening to you so well. It was the possibilities of tonight and how Kei, right now, was about to do whatever came out of your mouth. 

“I want you to eat me out,” you say. You could’ve stopped there, short and sweet, but the words tumble out and you don’t regret them one bit, “Want you to say please and thank you. You don’t do that very often.” Kei’s jaw tightens, but he doesn’t talk back.

“And I want Tadashi to watch,” you say to Kei and then turn to face Tadashi, “I want you to watch. Like last time.” You glance down to the small tent in Tadashi’s pants, let your eyes linger as an added explanation. “Just like last time. Do you understand?” Your tone is a mixture, a condescending softness. 

Tadashi lifts his hand, brings it steadily down to his bulge, but hesitates before touching himself through the fabric. “Now?” he asks. 

You give a small laugh, “The show hasn’t even started yet, but yes, if you’re that desperate.” 

You don’t know how quickly Tadashi is to start to touch himself because Kei hooks his arms underneath your legs and pulls your pussy against his mouth in one motion. You keep repeating to yourself that you’re in control. You have to keep reminding yourself or you would, probably instantaneously, slip back into doing whatever Kei wanted you to do.

Actually, even while you’re repeating to yourself that you’re in control, every part of you wants to close your eyes, lay back, and just let Kei do whatever he wants to do, and you know that tonight is all about what you want, but this is a once in a lifetime experience and you’re going to take advantage of it. You grab a fistful of Kei’s hair, pulling his head away from you in a way that surprises both of you.

“Say please.” It’s not nearly as cocky and confident and strong as you want it to be. In fact, it’s followed by an airy laugh from yourself because it’s so out of place. “Kei, baby, say please.”

“Please.” It’s not nearly as pleasing and desperate and appreciative as you want it to be. You cock your head. 

“That doesn’t sound like you really want to eat me out,” you furrow your eyebrows. You tighten your fist in his hair. “So say please.”

His eyes widen and he groans at your harsh grip, “Please, can I eat you out?”

“I still feel like you don’t really want to taste me, baby. I feel like you don’t want to bury your face in between my legs and eat me until I come all over your face.” You’re talking down to him now and the confidence is building in your chest as you watch his facial expressions shift. His mouth is basically watering. “I know you want that, so why don’t you ask really nicely and maybe I’ll let you.”

The pleasing, desperate, appreciative tone that you wanted is there and, with it, a bit of embarrassment to have to ask for something you usually beg for. “I- Please, can I please eat you out? I want to taste you and eat you, please.” His voice is more timid than you’ve ever heard it and it’s making your stomach flutter more than how close he is to you.

“You’re gonna make me come all over your pretty face, aren’t you?” you ask, slowly pulling his face towards your pussy. He’s moving with you, mouth opening as he gets centimeters away, but you stop him. “I asked you a question.”

“Yes,” he nods, trying to finish the motion and bury his face in between your legs.

“Yes what?”

“Yes, I’m going to make you come,” he mumbles. You can see just how much he wants to skip this part, but you’re having so much fun.

“Where am I going to come?” you smirk.

“All over my face,” Kei answers, knowing full well he’s not giving you the answer that you want.

“All… over… your…,” you say slowly, tilting his face upwards to look you directly in the eyes, watching the warmth spread across his features.

“Gonna make you come all over my pretty face,” Kei finally finishes.

“Now say please,” you tease.

“Please,” he says quickly.

“Pretty please?” you push on.

“Pretty please, fuck, (y/n), please let me eat you out. Please. I need to fucking eat you out. I need to feel your come on my tongue, need to taste it, need to please you and feel your thighs against my cheeks. Pretty please,” he spews, hoping that this time he actually gets to do what he’s been wanting to do since he knelt between your legs.

The last thing he sees before being pulled into your pussy is your huge smile. “Good boy, see, that wasn’t too hard.”

Between your legs, Kei has some ounce of control. He knows exactly what he’s doing and how to make you squirm and even though he had to say please a million times to get here and will have to stop when you say stop and follow your orders as you give them, until then, he gets to do whatever he wants. 

There’s no teasing, no build up. You’re so wet, dripping from teasing him and the control you felt with Tadashi. Kei doesn’t let a drop go to waste, running the flat of his tongue between your lips and prodding at your hole with the tip of his tongue. He doesn’t want to waste another second without his tongue deep inside of your tight little hole.

He fucks his tongue in and out of you, pressing his face as hard into you as he can in an attempt to get his tongue so deep inside you. You help as much as you can, both hands at the back of his head, pulling and tugging at his hair, clawing at his neck and back and as far down as you can reach. He knows how sensitive your hole is, feels it quivering against his tongue. 

He knows your body better than you do, knows exactly how to make you come. After all of the teasing you did, all of the talk, he can’t think of anything he wants more than to make you come as quickly as possible.

You weren’t going to stop him. 

“Holy fuck, Kei, oh my god.”

His lips are moving against your clit as he tries to fuck his tongue into you deeper. He’s moving his entire face, the tip of his tongue harsh against your hole as his nose nudges against your clit. The motions are perfectly repetitive just like he knows you like it. The louder that your moans get and the harder that you start to squirm and the tighter your hands grip, the more motivated Kei is. “Gonna, fuck, I’m gonna come all over your pretty face,” you tell him between moans.

Your core is tightening and your body is convulsing, but you can’t let go. You need to hear him. He needs to tell you. You want him to tell you. “Kei, fuck, tell me. Please, tell me. Let me come, please. Please.” There is no remorse, not even after the fact. Part of that comes with the lack of snide remarks or tone from Kei, the other part comes with just how close you are and how hard you’re about to fall.

“Come, baby, come all over my pretty face, please, please come for me. Please come all over my pretty face,” he says against your pussy, but you can hear each word so clearly. That’s all it takes for you to come undone. You let go, head hitting the mattress harshly as you grab onto his hair even harder. His name is the only thing coming out of your mouth, the only thing on your mind until it isn’t.

“Again, again, again,” you say, repeating as you nod at him.

He listens instantly, diving back between your legs and continuing to eat you out. He doesn’t have to tell you to come the second time or the third or the fourth. You let them roll over you like waves, coming as soon as your body allows you to. 

“Okay, okay, fuck, okay, that’s enough,” you breathe. He doesn’t stop, driven by the pure bliss in the reactions you’ve given him and the way that you dropped control for a passing moment. He wants to feel it again, taking control from you. You almost let him. “Fuck, Kei, enough,” you repeat, more stern this time. 

He lifts his head from between your legs, face a mess, hair tangled, breath ragged. “What do you say?” you ask, not even letting him compose himself before responding. 

“Thank you,” he says, and honestly, he looks just as grateful as the labored appreciation sounds. 

You push yourself up despite how much you want to just sit with Kei’s warm cheek against the fat of your thigh and despite how tired you are from everything that just happened and despite how you want to hear Kei thank you forever. “Kei, get him prepped for me, yea?” You miss the initial reaction from Tadashi, only catch the end of his attempts to compose himself and the lasting redness on his cheekbones. You don’t say another word until you’ve made it to the doorframe. “Dashi, Kei’s in charge while I’m gone, listen good, okay?”

You catch the faintest glimpse of Kei’s smirk as he stands tall once again, making his way over to the corner of the room that Tadashi was frozen in. The second that you’re out of view, you let yourself breathe, let your shoulders slump and your legs wobble as much as they want. You grab your bag that you left at the front door and change in the familiar bathroom closest to the top of the stairs. 

You went all out, decided that if you were going to do this, you were going to do this right. The thick main harness was just one part of the intricate buckles, straps, and fasteners. You had tried it on before, the first time that you got it. Kei helped you put it on, tightened the straps and moved each piece so it fit snug and comfortable. 

The top belt sits on your waist, thick faux leather straps with buckles on each side adorned to a ring that rests on your stomach. The second set of straps holds the main ring in place, two fasteners tightly fit against your hips. You slide the dildo into the ring before tightening the straps to your liking. It’s heavy between your legs, thick and lengthy, deceivingly lifelike to the touch and eye. 

As you’re putting the finishing touches onto your look, fixing the harness and making sure that everything is exactly as you want it to be, the soft and subtle noises that you’ve been hearing from the other room become louder. The noises quickly fill the entire upstairs. You’re sure at this point that Kei has asked Tadashi not to hold back, has told him explicitly not to. 

There is a lot of gratitude coming from Tadashi and only as he’s practically screaming can you hear what he’s thanking Kei for. 

“Thank you for getting me ready for (y/n),” Tadashi cries. “Feels so good, so good, fingers feel so good thank you, Kei.”

It sends a shiver down your spine, the amount of desperation and the sincerity of the thank you.

You gently press open the cap to the lube, letting a stream of the cool liquid coat the top side of the silicone cock. You use your thumb and palm to spread it over the skin, twisting your wrist and slathering the slick liquid all over, pouring a generous amount on the tip and watching it drip from the head. You know that it’s not really yours, that it’s not actually attached to you, that you don’t feel from it, and yet, as you push your hips forward, as the cock slides between the hole you’ve created with your fist, your core feels warm and you let out a small moan. 

The walk back to the room feels like a mile. You know that the two of them are undoubtedly too enthralled in their own actions right now to notice you at the door. It’s not a bad thing though. You get to watch for a few moments. They don’t know you’re there, aren’t acting in any sort of way for an audience or praise. 

Tadashi has taken your spot. His legs are high in the air, held up by his hands grasped around his ankles. Kei holds a bottle of lube in one hand and is fucking 4 fingers into Tadashi’s hole with the other. 

Tadashi’s cock, rock hard and angrily red, is slapping against his stomach every time that Kei’s fingers bottom out. The back of his head is pressed into the mattress so hard, but his eyes are trained on Kei, bottom lip quivering whenever involuntary noises weren’t tumbling from them, sheets bunched up against sweaty palms. 

You could’ve watched this all night. You’re sure that if you hadn’t interrupted them they would’ve continued all night, partially because you didn’t give them instruction to stop, but also because the determination and joy in Kei’s demeanor matches Tadashi’s desperation perfectly. There’s something about Kei’s actions that makes it incomparable to how he acts with you, something about the fact that even though he’s in control, he’s just following directions. 

“Is he ready?” you ask, followed by an observation, “Looks like you’re just doing this for him now.”

They’re startled at your voice, immediately taken out of the intense moment that the two of them were in, but there’s no disdain for the deprivation of the transfixion. The only word to describe the look on their faces is gawking. There is less surprise in Kei’s given he’s seen you in it before, but that doesn���t stop the harsh swallow or the dwelling gaze over your chest, down to your waist, following the straps. 

Tadashi isn’t as subtle. His face is bright red, blushing, gasping for air from just being stretched. He pushes up from the bed, props himself on his elbows, and just stares. You can practically feel his heartbeat from where you’re standing in the doorway. “Is that for me?” he asks, void of the confidence the question deserves, tongue wetting his lips. 

You walk over, agonizingly slow, cock in hand. “Why don’t you turn around and I’ll show you?”

By the time you’ve made it to the edge of the bed, Tadashi has scrambled over himself and gotten on all fours, as if any delay would result in you giving up on the notion. You climb onto the bed, knees sinking into the mattress as you take in the sight before you. Tadashi looks rigid, not knowing when the next order or movement is coming, eyes forward on the pale wall. 

The second that the soft skin of your palms comes into contact with his hips, he melts into you, pushing back into your touch. His shoulders slump, head falls down, staring at the comforter below him instead. “Is this alright? Are you ready?” you ask, leaving one palm resting on his hip, but using the other hand to guide the tip of the dripping dildo against Tadashi’s stretched hole. 

The answer is evident in the urgency of his whimpers and the desperation in his reactions, but you need to hear it coming out of his mouth. “I’m not going to fuck you until you tell me you’re ready for it,” you clarify. 

“Yes, yes, I’m ready, please,” Tadashi answers. 

“Good boy.” There’s only a second between the finishing of your praise and you pressing your hips forward. It’s slow, but the pace is necessary no matter how badly you want to watch him take it all right this instant. You’re using your hand to guide the thick cock into Tadashi’s tight hole. You don’t need to physically feel it to know how tight it is, to see the rim swallowing the dildo. 

The moans and whimpers have ceased, replaced by labored breaths and diffused whines. You’d ask him questions, try to elicit some sort of verbal reply to the process, but he looks so focused on taking your cock. Still, you guide him through it, not just with the small kneading that you’re doing into his hip and the slow pace you’ve adapted, but with small coos of appreciation. “You’re doing so great, Dashi, fuck. It looks so good back here, you taking my nice thick cock just like that.” 

As soon as you don’t need your hand to guide the dildo, you lace it into Tadashi’s hair. It’s so soft. You can barely grasp any of it, can’t reach until he picks his head up and pushes it back into your hand. You feel disgustingly powerful now, hand weaved into Tadashi’s hair, slowly thrusting in and out of Tadashi’s ass. 

It takes a few beats for Tadashi to fully stretch around the girth of your cock, but with every gentle fuck into him, his whines turn back into whimpers which turn into throaty moans. “Can I go faster now?” you ask with a genuine softness. “Can you handle it?” with less genuine softness. He nods, choking out a few yeses amongst the noises.

You reward him with praise once again, “Good boy, huh, Tadashi? Are you my good boy?” You punctuate the question with a hard thrust, your hips meeting his ass in one fluid motion. His hair is tugged by your harsh grip and, with it, his lax body every time that you pull your hips away. 

He’s putty in your hand, malleable. The harder that you fuck him, the louder his moans get, the more power you feel. “Fuck, Dashi, it’s like I can fucking feel how pathetic you are squeezing my goddamn cock. So tight, so fucking perfect.” Your hips are on fire from repeatedly slamming into him, your palms are so sweaty that you can barely get a good grip, resorting to using your nails to anchor in place instead. Praise keeps falling out of your mouth so quickly that you’re not even sure what you’re saying half the time. It’s fast and you’re in control and he’s listening to you and you’re so drunk with this feeling. 

You can’t stop ramming into him, glad, actually, for once that you can’t feel how good Tadashi’s tight hole is squeezing your cock. It lets you fuck him relentlessly, no worry in the world about stamina even if your glutes and core are on fire from the constant motion. You don’t want to stop, can’t, not with how fucking perfect he looks, not with how fucking obedient he’s being. 

“I know you just want to be good, Dashi, fuck, we’ll teach you to be good, you’re being so good,” you moan. 

It’s like you’re a completely different person here, so vastly different than the last time you were in this bedroom. You don’t miss it, not even a little bit. Well… at least not at this exact moment. 

With no word from you, Kei has just been standing there, behind you, just watching . All of your attention is on Tadashi, soaking in his noises and body language, you’ve barely even noticed Kei. One quick glance over your shoulder and you can see how mesmerized he looks taking it all in, seeing you in this new element. You see the bulge in his pants, the little satisfaction that he is getting from his own palm. After doing so much already, he deserves better than what he’s giving himself now. 

“Do what you do best, Kei. Abuse his throat,” you command, trying to keep a steady voice through your wandering thoughts and thrusts. You don’t have to ask him twice, barely have to finish the three word demand and he’s walking around to the other side of the bed. 

He gets to see the side that you don’t get to see, the mouth agape and wet lashes. All that you get to see is the smirk that plagues the bottom half of Kei’s face as soon as Tadashi is in view. Your thrusts are slower now, but still at a steady enough pace to appreciate the subtle ripples in the fat of Tadashi’s ass, letting Kei get a good hold on the situation, giving up just a small fraction of your control so that Kei can have his way with Tadashi. 

You offer a bit of advice as Kei is undoing his buckle. “It’s easy to pleasure Kei,” you breathe, “You just let him do whatever he wants to you.” You can practically feel Tadashi tighten around you. 

“Open,” Kei says as soon as his cock is exposed to the air. “Wider than that, Tadashi, don’t insult me.” Both of Kei’s hands are braced on either side of Tadashi’s face as Kei pushes the tip of his cock past Tadashi’s lips. “Just like that, good.” Kei’s voice is monotonous, if only a bit condescending. “Keep that hole nice and tight for me.”

You watch Tadashi shiver as he drinks up every single word. Tadashi has been on the reciprocating end of Kei’s smart mouth before, but not like this. Even the last time he was in this room with the two of you, the directions that he was following only affected himself. Tadashi knows how poor he’s been at pleasing you in the past and he really just wants to be good, wants to listen and learn.

Kei shallowly thrusts in and out of Tadashi’s mouth, the head of his cock repeatedly slipping past Tadashi’s wet lips. “Use that slutty fucking tongue, Tadashi. You’re not doing anything, just sitting there getting railed, the least you could do is move your tongue.” Kei lets his head fall back, something evidently changing in the technique that Tadashi is using. “Good.”

The more that Kei seems to be enjoying it, the deeper his thrusts go, the faster his pace. It doesn’t take long for Kei to start using Tadashi like he uses you. If Tadashi didn’t look like he was enjoying himself as much as he did, pushing back onto your cock, whimpering and gagging around Kei’s, you would have stopped and taken his place. 

He couldn’t make you come for years, even as you tried to guide him, begged him as you cried out instructions, but there was something so different about the way he’s going down on Kei. 

You had directed him in the past, nudged his face where you wanted it to be, wrapped your legs around his neck to pull him deeper, but none of it mattered. He just couldn’t make you come. 

But there was something so distinctly different about the way Kei was treating Tadashi. There was no begging or asking, and directing wasn’t the right word, neither was guiding. Kei now has a commanding hold of Tadashi’s face, one hand on either side as he moves Tadashi’s mouth up and down his cock. His hips are still, letting Tadashi’s head bob through the complete motion. 

When Kei’s methods catch your eye, you can’t help but stop to take it in, no longer watching the ripples in his skin as your hips meet his ass, now watching it unfold from this angle, from behind Tadashi, your cock engulfed by his tight hole.

Kei’s long fingers bracket Tadashi’s face, pushing into his jaw, neck, cheek, wherever he could reach, and wherever he needed to adjust to get the most perfect angle. It’s mesmerizing. 

And it’s so different from the way he handles you. Sometimes he holds your face like that, moves you so agonizingly slow on his length that your throat will hurt for days after, but there’s always an amount of trust. 

This in front of you? The way that Kei is so meticulously moving Tadashi, the way that he’s leaving nothing up to assumption or interpretation, this is Kei teaching. 

He’s wordless about it, doesn’t teach Tadashi through verbal instructions or lengthy explanations, he just shows him exactly what he wants. It’s almost more condescending than if Kei was talking down to him in a way, like he’s too stupid to understand what he means, so he can only show him. 

You don’t think Tadashi catches this or thinks this far or has any thoughts at all right now other than controlling his breathing and every single muscle in his mouth and throat. It’s not a normal state of being, you know that well. 

You catch a glimpse of Kei’s face, manage to pull your attention away from the thick cock splitting Tadashi open and Kei’s strong hands on Tadashi’s jaw. His face is strewn with pleasure and concentration. You don’t normally get to watch Kei from this angle nor this intently. You watch his eyebrows furrow together, his jaw clench between slow exhales, his features soften and his eyes flutter close every once and awhile. You’re cursing yourself for never having filmed the two of you having sex. You would watch this on repeat if you could.

“Kei,” you breathe, ready to repeat yourself on account of how quiet his name is in comparison to the lewd sounds that are bouncing off the walls. Kei looks up at you immediately with an air of confusion, waiting for another command or instruction. When nothing else comes, he doesn’t break eye contact like you thought he might. He’s not paying attention to Tadashi save for the mindless thrusting. “God, you look so good right now.”

He clicks his tongue at the compliment, shaking his head a small amount before returning his focus, looking back down almost quick enough to hide the subtle blush on his cheekbones. You don’t force him to look back at you, though you know that you could, but you still want to have some sort of contact with him. You are becoming increasingly aware of how much you want to be where Tadashi is and how much you want to feel Kei’s skin on yours.

Tadashi’s voice pulls you out of it, the repetition of your name that follows his gasping for air. “Want, want to- So good- Need to come,” Tadashi manages to get out in between harsh swallows and intakes of air. 

“Not yet.” It comes out of your mouth without any thought and you realize why Kei does this so often. The sense of power that comes alongside controlling Tadashi’s orgasm is mindblowing. Even if he came right now, didn’t listen to you at all, you would have rode this high for weeks. 

Tadashi does listen, though. He whimpers a small okay before Kei starts using his throat again. You claw your fingernails into his hips, pressing hard enough to leave small indents in his soft skin, and you pull him onto your cock to match your thrusts. “Look at that, see, you didn’t need to cum, not yet, Dashi, being such a good boy.”

Kei only gets to fuck Tadashi’s throat for a few moments before Tadashi is pulling away once again. “I- I can’t hold it any longer, please,” Tadashi’s voice cracks as he begs. “Please.” You pull out in one motion leaving Tadashi gaping and empty in front of you. 

“Then come, Tadashi,” you say in a tone that is eerily as condescending as Kei’s. You run your hands down Tadashi’s side, grabbing onto his ass and spreading him open as wide as you can. “If you can’t hold it, then cum.”

Tadashi is thrusting into the air. “I- I can’t.”

“You’ve come without touching yourself before,” your voice is stern but steady at first, but as you keep thinking about it, there is a simmering underlying anger that is emerging. “Sat right there on the corner of the bed and came in your pants like a pathetic little cuck.”

You grab Tadashi by the shoulder, flipping him over onto his back. “Kei, pillow under his head so he can look at me while I’m fucking talking to him.” Kei doesn’t hesitate for a second, puts the pillow underneath Tadashi’s head so that his line of sight is directly at your face, eyes narrowed as you continue. 

“When no one is paying attention to you, when you’re watching your ex get railed and satisfied in a way that you never could, you lose your mind. You’ll shoot your load, make a fucking mess all over yourself, but when I’m here giving you everything that you could ever want, you can’t fucking come?”

You positioned yourself between Tadashi’s legs, the head of the dildo grazing his hole. “What? When Kei tells you to do it you can, but when I tell you to come after pounding my fat fucking cock in and out of you, you can’t? Do you know how fucking pathetic that is?” 

Tadashi’s chest is rising and falling faster, his breath is labored and he’s not breaking eye contact with you. You can tell just how close he is.

“I won’t tell you again. Instead, I’ll just fucking leave. Come. Now.” You wrap your hand around his throat, leaning your weight into your grip as his face scrunches up in ecstasy. His lips are moving, but no sound is coming out and only when you ease up on your grip can you hear the gratitude that he’s repeating in between the grunts.

His come spills from the head of his cock, lazily dripping down the sides of his rock hard erection and down his twitching balls. He’s struggling to keep his hands at his side and not jerk himself off through his orgasm. 

“Is that all it took?” you scoff, pressing the head of the dildo against his asshole, catching some of his come as it drips down. “Still hard though, right, Dashi? Still want to get fucked?” You don’t give him time to answer before pushing your hips forward, slowly spearing him with your cock as tears fall from his eyes.

“Yes, fuck, please, I want to come again,” Tadashi begs, eyes not leaving yours. 

“Greedy,” you shake your head, but you can’t hide your smirk as you pick up the pace. In this position you get to watch his face as you ruin him. The tears that are running down his face, wetting his cheeks and long lashes, just make it that much hotter. His cock is slapping against his stomach as thrust in and out of him.

It doesn’t take long before his breaths are closer together, back is arching, hips rolling, and he’s nodding in your direction. “I- I’m already so close. Can- I need- I want-.”

“What do you want? Tell me and I’ll give it to you. You’ve been so good, came for me without anything but my voice, took Kei’s cock so well, just tell me what you want,” you say.

No one has touched his cock all night, covered in his own come, violently twitching against himself as it slaps against his stomach. 

His eyes are screwed shut, thrusting up into nothing, consequently fucking himself on your cock, you’re sure that he’s going to ask to touch himself. In your mind, there’s no other option, nothing that he would feel comfortable enough asking for. 

It leaves his mouth so confidently. He trusts you so much, knows that you wouldn’t have said it if it wasn’t true, so he asks for exactly what he wants and he’s so assured as he does. 

“Want Tsukki’s mouth on my cock.”

You look up to see Kei’s reaction, refuse to do it if there is any sort of discomfort or distaste, but there’s nothing of the sort. He gives a short nod, a nod that Tadashi is too fucked out to notice. You don’t slow your pace or allow a falter in your rhythm as you watch Kei climb onto the bed. He’s gentle as he takes Tadashi’s cock into his mouth, captures the head first, swirling his tongue around the tip before taking the entire length. Kei doesn’t seem to struggle much, easily takes it to the base.

Tadashi is surprised despite the fact that he’s the one that asked for it so nicely. His eyes flutter shut, truly taking in every single feeling and sensation that is happening to him right now. Tadashi’s hips are thrusting up into Kei’s mouth now, moaning as he slides down Kei’s throat and then falls down onto your cock. 

“Gonna- Can I? Please,” Tadashi can barely say more than two words at a time, but you know exactly what he’s asking for. 

“Go ahead, Dashi, come, you deserve it.” 

As soon as you say the word, he’s coming down Kei’s throat. You watch it drip from the corners of Kei’s mouth as Tadashi keeps thrusting desperately. Tadashi is thanking you and thanking Kei and mumbling other words that you can’t quite pick up. His hands are roaming, trying to find a place to land. One finds a spot lightly on Kei’s shoulder and you meet the other hand with your own, locking your fingers with his as he holds onto you through his orgasm.

Kei waits for Tadashi to calm down before pulling his head off of his cock. Kei wipes his lips and you can tell there's a smart comment that wants to come out so badly, but he doesn’t get the chance to say it. 

“Thank you,” Tadashi says, eyes shutting every other second. You’re surprised that he’s still awake after two back-to-back orgasms like that. His eyebrows furrow and he perks up just a little bit, “but, wait, what about- what about you guys?”

You shake your head, carefully getting up from the bed, cautious not to disturb Tadashi as Kei gently positions him more comfortably in bed. You unbuckle the straps on your harness, taking it off and stepping out of it. You feel so light without the extra weight between your legs.

You manage to get in bed before Kei reaches for the covers and extra blankets. “This wasn’t about us,” you assure Tadashi. “Thank you for letting us in and for trusting us enough to do this again.” You feel the mattress dip behind you as Kei climbs underneath the covers he’s laid on top of the two of you. 

In the morning there will be more to say, more conversations to be had, boundaries to set and feelings to talk out, but for now… for now you are happily in bed, surrounded and warm, and you know that your company is too. 

taglist: @daddyjackfrost @karasunoya @girlwith-kalei-do-scope-eyes @itsmeteiiteii @omiivr @cyueksims @kei-tsuki21 @ks-tsukki @snazzyturtles @rinniemybeloved @tsukiran @kurapika-1999 @hehatesmati

join my taglist here!! ~~ (one more chapter left?!?!?!) ♡ ʀᴇʙʟᴏɢs ᴀɴᴅ ɪɴᴛᴇʀᴀᴄᴛɪᴏɴs ᴍᴇᴀɴ ᴛʜᴇ ᴡᴏʀʟᴅ ♡

[for-fvckssake]

“if we're getting actual coffee, we'll get you a decaf. so it doesn't mess with your sleep, deal? or you could have tea! that works too,” his lips meet your temple in a gentle kiss, only a few moments after yours touch him.

eren feels you lean into him again, and the movement makes your back press against his toned chest in such a perfect fit that it makes his eyes soften and smile widen.

he's such a sucker for you.

everything about you always felt so alluring to him; from the way you walked to the way you managed to set fire to his skin with just a mere touch… bewitched would be a fun word to describe it, but even then it wouldn't be enough to express how much he feels towards you.

eren tries to maintain eye contact from the corner of his eyes, doing his best to listen to you as you talk, but it doesn't take long till your words begin to melt together as his focus to fall to your lips. the hand you hold close, is the same one he uses to tilt your face to the side, allowing him to have access to your lips as he leaves a long lasting kiss against the soft, plush skin.

“sounds good, babe,” he whispers against your lips before kissing you again, this time a much shorter and contained one. “lets get you out of the water, yeah? its gonna be chilly outside, cant have you catching a cold or something,” he says but makes no move to get up whatsoever, both arms now wrapped around your waist.

-Rennie <3333333

“yknow what, one, fuck you for even suggesting decaf, like what’s the point of decaf?? two, let’s just sleep in that case. its late anyways.” i huff out, stretching my arms out.

“also i didn’t mean the fuck you. but yeah, let’s get out.” i say, flipping myself over so i’m on my stomach to give you a long, sweet kiss.

i slip out, waiting for you behind me before i dry myself off and step out of the wetroom and grab your sweatshirt lying on the floor before pulling it on and then sitting on the bathroom to watch you dry yourself off with a grin, eyes unable to peel myself off of you. not out of lost, but a need.

a need to memorize every inch just as an artist would their muse. stuck in their memory for good, their statuesque perfection unwavering. i needed to remember every inch. to remember how he feels. hot skip, soft slips, the faint mint toothpaste mixed with my honey chapstick when we kiss.

fuck, i should write all this down.

[homosexuality-at-its-finest]

To love a hero

A/n: So I'm really sad right now and I'm gonna project that onto my writings, sorry in advance

Plot: Loving a hero is a difficult and heart wrenching task

Pairing: Peter parker x male reader

Y/n: Your name

L/n: Last name

N/n: Nickname

H/c: Hair color

Warnings: lotta angst, happy ending because I’m not a monster, cussing, major character injury

Word count: 1774

Y/n L/n and Peter Parker went way back, even farther than Peter and Ned. The two had been friends since Pre-K, and only grew closer as the years went by. The two were almost interpretable, if one of the boys was seen, the other was close by.

No one really understood their friendship, but no one questioned it either. In high school the two boys became impossibly closer, Y/n was the first to know about Peter’s abilities, the brunette couldn’t keep something so big from his best friend. Y/n was there and helped make his first suit, the boy was there to soothe his aching bones and to nurse his blossoming bruises.

The pair shared an unbreakable bond, they were what love stories depicted. The love between them was seen by everyone but the two. Of course, Peter knew he was in love with Y/n and vice versa, but for two genius’ they were both dumbasses. Hell, even Tony stark noticed the young love blossoming, the billionaire could see how much the pair adored each other.  

On multiple occasions he’d tried to coerce the young superhero into admitting his feelings but was always given the same response.

“Y/n doesn’t like me like that Mr. Stark, I’m not ruining our friendship over my feelings.” Simple and to the point, but it drove Tony insane that the young genius was so fucking blind. He opted against bringing it up again after seeing such clear pain in Peter’s eyes every time they talked about it, being a bystander as time passed by.

Maybe Peter couldn’t see how enamored Y/n was with him, but Tony could. Especially as he clutched the said boy against his chest as he let out guttural and heart wrenching sobs.

It had all started off as a normal Saturday, Peter was over at Y/n’s the two sitting on the couch and watching some unknown movie, it was purely background noise. The two boys were to focused on each other and their conversation to care about the movie. The domestic peace was ruined by Peter’s phone chiming, a familiar sound that always caused dread to run down Y/n’s spine.

It was the sound of Peter’s police scanner, hearing the radio chatter begin. “Unknown entity in central park, currently creating a perimeter and pushing back civilians, backup requested.” The look of determination crossed over Peter’s features, and if Y/n knew Peter would listen, he’d beg for him to let the avengers take care of it.

“That’s my cue, I’ll see you later N/n!” Peter did a mock salute to his best friend, easily escaping the home via window. For some unknown reason Y/n felt on edge, his gut tightening painfully. He immediately flicked on the news, only having to wait a few moments before the familiar figure of spiderman flung into frame.

The fight was nerve wrecking, watching as the Villain and superhero alike exchanged punches and kicks, and Y/n knew Peter was probably making stupid quips to keep his anxiety under control. The H/c haired boy gnawed on his bottom lip as he watched the fight escalate, getting more violent by the second.

The villain had hit Peter with all their might, and Y/n could only watch as the boy he loved more than anything was flung against a building before he crumpled to the ground. It was as the world stood still, stealing all the breath from Y/n’s lungs as the figure of spiderman didn’t budge, he didn’t get up. Peter promised he’d always get back up.

He felt like his heart had been ripped out of his chest and stomped on, air was to thick to breathe and he could feel the moisture running down his face and the devastated cry that left his lips went unheard. The boy couldn’t really remember when Happy arrived at his house, a grim expression on his face as he looked at the disheveled teenager.

Y/n couldn’t remember the drive to the compound, it was as if his brain had just shut down, leaving him devoid of any life. Maybe that’s what Peter was like right now, devoid of life. His constant chatter silenced, his jittery movements stilled, his beautiful face pulled into the blank look of death.

The teenage boy could remember that Happy had to pull over so Y/n could vomit on the side of the road, silent sobs clenching his lungs in their vice. Never in all of his short life had he felt so much pain, never had he begged for the sweet release of darkness as he did now.

The H/c haired boy begged any god that would listen for this to be a nightmare, that he’d wake up and he and Peter would still be on the couch. The brunette would tease him for falling asleep, but he’d take anything to make this pain go away.

When he finally got to the compound and saw Tony waiting, the same grim look on his face as happy, it felt like every last shred of his strength and control was gone. Y/n collapsed into Tony’s arms, breaking into pieces. He only processed a few words “surgery” “critical” and “I’m so sorry.” Everything blended together as the billionaire led him to the medical wing, holding onto the breaking teenager, as if his touch would mend him.

Hours felt like eternity, it was hellish. The sobs that once left the teenager were turned into deafening silence, the occasional sniffle leaving the boy, comforting Tony that the child was in fact still alive.

May had shown up at some point, Y/n couldn’t honestly remember when, or honestly care. Not when he felt like part of himself was missing, leaving a gaping hole where Peter once was.

Good news came in the form of a doctor informing them, at hour 4 of waiting, that Peter had survived the surgery and was now stable. If it wasn’t for his healing factor, the teenager would’ve been dead. He was under sedatives currently, so his body could work solely on healing.

It felt like a weight off of everyone’s chest, he was okay, alive and breathing. The 3 walked in silence to Peter’s room, May and Y/n taking their respective sides on Peter, as Tony sat at the foot of the bed.

Hours were spent in silence, May haven fallen asleep not to long after receiving the news that Peter was okay. Tony and Y/n stayed awake, both lost in their own thoughts. The teenager held Peter’s hand, thumb brushing over his knuckles silently. His eyes rarely left the still form, scared that if he looked away the boy would disappear from his grasp.

“Yknow what sucks about loving a hero?” Y/n’s broken voice cut through the silence, starling Tony from his thoughts. He didn’t reply, his gaze falling on the teenager. Y/n looked over at Tony and fuck that look should never be on a child. He looked so broken, so tired.

“I know he’s going to die long before me, and I’ll be stuck in this fucked up world without him.” A humorless laugh broke through the boys’ lips, it sounded watery and oh so broken. “I’m not ready to live without him Tony.” A quiet sob left his lips, his free hand going to stifle it.

“I love him so much, and it scares me so fucking bad.” Y/n’s eyes moved back over to Peter, shakily bringing the sleeping boy’s hand up to kiss his knuckles. Tony felt his chest tighten painfully; this was really a reminder that they were just kids who grew up way to fast.

“He’s not going to die Y/n, not if I have anything to say about it.” Tony replied in a surprisingly gentle but determined tone. He’d be damned if he let this pair get separated, Peter and Y/n deserved to be together. To grow up together and create a life.

The room fell into silence after that, neither of them wanting to broach the topic again. In the early hours of the morning Peter’s doe like eyes opened once more. Every inch of his body ached with an indescribable pain, and he had to hold back a grimace. He was surprised to see the 3 most important people in his life strewn about the room, two fast asleep. Y/n was still awake though, clasping Peter’s hand like a lifeline has his tired eyes burned into the sheets.

Peter gave his best friends hand a gentle squeeze, but it was enough for the boy’s head to shoot up so fast Peter was scared he’d get whiplash. “Peter! Oh, thank God.” The H/c haired boy breathed out, and even through his eyes were red and puffy from tears and purple bags so dark they looked like bruises bloomed under his eyes, he was still the most gorgeous creature Peter had ever seen.

Peter gave a weak smile, squeezing his hand once more. “How long have I been out?” He questioned; head tipped to the side like a curious puppy. “About 12 hours.” Y/n replied, voice cracking slightly.

The gentle aura Y/n held around him quickly disappeared into one of anger. “If you ever do that to me again Peter I swear to God, I’ll kill you myself.” Y/n spit out angrily, but the anger was gone as fast as it had appeared.

“I thought you died, and that was the most painful thing I have ever experienced. I love you, and I’d rather you be with the land of the living.” The confession was made by a boy to tired to process he had said it.

Peter felt a wave of guilt crash over him at the boy’s confession. He knew now wasn’t the time to talk on the subject. “I’m okay N/n and trust me I won’t be doing that again any time soon. Why don’t we sleep and talk again in the morning?”

Peter was exhausted, and he knew his best friend was too, they could talk about this at a later date. As Y/n made a sound of agreement, laying his head against the mattress, Peter knew that everything would be okay. It didn’t matter what horrors he faced, or what pain he went through. He had made a promise to Y/n. He’d get up every time, and he’d be damned if he ever made the Boy he loved go through that pain again.

[ready-to-obeyme]

[OM!] Merging Timelines (Lucifer/MC)

Summary: Your nightmares become less frequent the less you refer to the other timeline as ‘yours’ and the more you convince yourself that this timeline is the only one that exists.

Alternatively: After waiting for you to come back, Lucifer goes searching for you to bring you back home.

Alternatively 2:0: what’s better than one Lucifer? TWO Lucifers!!!! But it really isn’t :(

Word Count: 2k+

Notes: Gender neutral reader (”they”); *throws angst at you* like leaving behind the original timeline wasn’t bad enough; I don't actually remember what Barbatos did to the other timelines-- if it was destroyed or if we just broke off into another junction, but I’m leaning towards the latter theory... yknow, for the angst, (had to repost this because tags weren’t working :’((( )

--

Every time you encounter something that was different or uncomfortable for you in the Devildom, you adapt. Just as you adjust to being in a timeline you had no intentions of being a part of not out of complacency, but out of desperation.

You scramble to make new memories with the seven demon brothers.

You go along with every antic Mammon or Levi pull you in and drown yourself with face masks and new lotions with Asmo. You cook your favorite recipes for Beel and discuss your favorite genres with Satan. You even help Belphie rekindle his relationship with his brothers; it’s familiar, easy for you to forget what you have lost when you’re busy helping others, even though every time he looks at you, you remember the feeling of his hands on your throat.

Your gaze lingers on Lucifer more, trailing after him. Before he notices, you’re already looking elsewhere, pretending like you don’t imagine time and time again when your hands were on his as he bared his heart and finally allowed himself to be vulnerable around his brothers-- around you-- before you were swept to the past you had no right to meddle in. Still, like with the other brothers, you do what you can to make up for lost time, even though you feel a sense of dread that you’ll never be able to have the same relationship with the brothers that you had when you bound together against Diavolo for Belphie.

(Especially not with Lucifer, who had vouched for you to find the truth and save Belphie, who let you embrace him in the catacombs and allowed your hands to give him the reassurance he needed to speak, whose concern was etched on his face as you declared that you would go to the past alone.)

Your nightmares become less frequent the less you refer to the other timeline as ‘yours’ and the more you convince yourself that this timeline is the only one that exists.

And it gets better (as it must) when you spend time with all of them, building your relationship to a point that you slowly begin to truly believe that things will be okay. It starts to actually feel that way when you attend Diavolo’s birthday party, pleasantly surprised at the presents that you are given. You’re warmed by the thought that went into each of them, flushing at the way Lucifer looks at you and pins the brooch right above your left breast with a gentleness you have always known he was capable of (even if he doesn’t realize it himself).

You meet Belphie outside, where there are lights above like stars, at the rocky pavement nearest the lake and accept his present. His pact burns onto your skin like all the other five, and he tells you he has never thought of you as Lilith as neither do the other brothers. Like a bad habit, you think about your other timeline, wondering if you had stayed if this scenario would have happened, and what would have changed otherwise.

“Hey-y-y, whaddya think you’re doin’ over there?! Did you forget who’s the guest of honor tonight?” You hear Mammon’s voice call out from a distance. You laugh when he huffs loudly, “Get back to the party, on the double!”

“Coming!” You reply back, grinning at Belphie who only grimaces at Mammon’s shouting.

“Why are you all the way over there,” Asmo whined, hugging you the moment you reached them.

“Sorry,” you say, returning his embrace gently. (Inwardly, you vow to make sure he has your full attention when asked, though you know he has no idea why you would do such a thing.) “Belphie was just giving me his gift,” you explain, smiling lightly when Belphie flushes at the sudden attention. He gravitates towards Beel as Mammon leers at him and Levi rolls his eyes at how ‘dramatic’ everything was.

“Oh, did he now,” Satan remarks, amusement laced in his every word. Belphie glares. “I understand the need for privacy, but the distance seems kind of excessive, don’t you think?”

“Wouldn’t you have preferred Lucifer to be more than a few feet away when we made our pact?” You tease, watching as the blond raises his hand to his face and similarly tries to hide his blush.

“W-Well, that was a different time--”

“You’re not exactly wrong,” Asmo comments, pointing to the marble pavilion out on the lake. “Lucifer’s not really that far off when these sort of things happen.”

At the sight of the eldest brother approaching with his black coat billowing behind him, Mammon swears. “Oh crap,” he says, starting to nudge you towards the Demon Prince’s castle. “C’mon, we should scram before he comes and yells at us for leaving the party.”

You laugh. “You say that like it’s something we can avoid,” you tell him, letting yourself get pulled regardless even as you glance back with a twinkle in your eyes at the familiar sight of Lucifer storming up to them in a huff.

That is, until he calls out your name.

There is something wrong.

You’re aware that Mammon and Satan are looking at you in concern when you stop walking, but you don’t have the heart to reassure them when you’re not sure if everything is okay. Lucifer calls out your name again, and you’re startled, heart beating a mile a minute as his voice wraps your name in a flurry of fear and desperation.

You didn’t realize Lucifer could ever sound like that.

Without thinking, you start to walk toward him, mind racing with every worst scenario you can think up of. “Lucifer,” you start to say, concerned, “Lucifer, what’s wrong--”

Lucifer gives you no chance to finish your sentence as he pulls you into his chest, his arms wrapped around you tightly, leaving no space in between the two of you. Almost instinctively, you reach up and hold him, confused and worried but happy to provide him with an embrace if that is what he needed. (You wonder if he hugs like this every time, intimately close and comfortably tight, and for a moment you wish you had a chance to do this with your-- the other Lucifer.)

You hear some murmurs and strangled yells (probably Mammon) in the background, but you find yourself more focused on the warmth of his arms around your body and the way Lucifer’s eyes seem to glean in the light of the dark when he reluctantly pulls away.

You open your mouth to ask again when he beats you to the punch.

“Where have you been?” Lucifer asks-- no, demands of you, hands gripping your shoulders. His eyes search over you, as if checking for injuries or ailments.

You blink. “Oh, I was just with Belphie for a moment,” you tell him slowly, unsure why his eyes widen. You bite your lip. “Sorry, I know we’re supposed to be at the party and all but--”

Lucifer shakes his head. “That doesn’t matter,” he says, and hesitates for a moment before brushing his hand across your face gently. “Let’s go back home,” he tells you softly, dropping his hand until he is able to grasp yours.

“Home?” You echo, following his lead with worry. “What do you mean? I thought you’d be mad that we’d leave the ball, but you want to go home?”

At this, Lucifer turns his head with brows drawn together, mirroring your expression of concern. “What do you mean?”

You stop in your tracks, and Lucifer has no choice but to drop your arms as you stand at a distance. “Lucifer,” you start to say, “I don’t understand. Today is Diavolo’s birthday party-- you made me a guest of honor and everything. Are-- are you sure you’re okay?”

Before Lucifer could reply, you felt a hand on your shoulder pull you back. You look behind you to see Beel guiding you behind him, like Lucifer was someone to be protected from. The thought makes your stomach churn.

“Hey, you’re being pretty weird right now, Lucifer,” Mammon retorts, coming up beside you. “Where do you think you’re going right now, anyhow? The castle is that way.”

Looking at Mammon, Lucifer falters, but after glancing back at you, something in him resolves and his face sets.

“We’re not going back to the party,” he says with a tone of finality.

Mammon sputters, “Wh-What--?!”

“Diavolo’s birthday party was months ago for me,” Lucifer tells you even as this statement makes you reel. “I understand this may be confusing, but please trust me. Come back home with me,” he says, this time more gently, holding out his hand again. “To us.”

“No one is going anywhere.”

Your heart jumps at the sound of the familiar voice, and with growing dread, you turn away from Lucifer-- gentle, desperate, firm, and casually cladded-- only to see another Lucifer in his demon form, wings bristling and eyes burning with a dark ember as he sees himself right before him..

The last month comes back to you all at once: the nightmares, the paralyzing grief, and the slow and steady tread to the life you had before in the Devildom. And you suddenly feel the sharp pang of loss again when you see all that you have built up, all this time convincing yourself that you had left no one behind, come crashing down.

There were now two Lucifers: one from the timeline in which you left and the one in which you came to.

The original Lucifer (your Lucifer, your mind croons cruelly) glares at his alterself, giving no quarter. “We,” he says darkly, transforming into his demonic form, “are going to be leaving. Whether you allow it is not of my concern.”

“What is happening?” Levi cries out, glancing between the two Lucifers, indiscernible from each other. “Why are there two of them?”

“That doesn’t matter,” says Mammon, growling. “What’s the deal, huh, Lucifer-- if you really are him.” He puts his hands on his hips and glares. “‘Cause if you really are him, you’d know how important--”

“Trust me,” your Lucifer replies coldly, “I know how important they are. I don’t need anyone telling me.”

The other Lucifer-- the one who pinned the brooch on for you-- steps forward and puts an arm to obscure his counterpart’s view of you. “Then leave,” he demands. “They’re not going with you.”

You can see your Lucifer’s wings spread wide in anger, but he sees you and is once again quelled. (You don’t remember having such an effect on him, but it hurts your heart trying to wonder why you do now.) He says your name again, and steps forward despite his alterself brother’s raising hackles. “Did you ever want to get back home to us at all? Did you ever think of us?” asks Lucifer, putting a hand on his chest, eyes soft. “Of me?”

“Of course!” You cry out before you could think of doing otherwise. You step forward, stopped only by the other Lucifer’s arm blocking your path. You squeeze your eyes against the tears that stung them. “Of course I did! How could I not?”

“You were gone for months,” your Lucifer tells you, voice strained. “No sign of you coming back whatsoever. I held hope that maybe someday you would return to us but--” His eyes flashes with something unfamiliar, something you hoped to see for as long as you have been in love with him. “I will not lose you. Even if it’s to myself.”

“I love you,” your Lucifer says with a voice as sincere and vulnerable as it could be. “Truly and deeply. Please-- come back.”

“Lucifer, I--”

You jump at the hand that grabs your wrist, and you look up to see the other Lucifer look at you with a deep-seeded fear that made your heart clench.

“I will not lose you a second time,” he says quietly to you, and your heart stutters. He glares at his counterpart with an intensity that rivaled even the hottest fires. “You’re outnumbered, you know,” he says coolly.

You’re unsure if the other Lucifer actually means it-- that he would have his brothers fight himself, even from another timeline. The way the brothers shift behind you tells you that this is and never will be an easy decision-- nor it was for you.

“I agree with Lucifer for once,” Satan comments, smiling with a sharpness that didn’t reach his eyes. “Brother or not… it’s a fact that you don’t belong here, and we don’t take kindly to other demons taking what’s ours.”

“Looks like you’re selfish in every timeline, huh, Lucifer?” Belphie goads unkindly, stepping up next to Lucifer with Satan flanking his other side.

Instead of flinching, your Lucifer looks at you before gazing at his brothers, half of whom was hesitant to fight and the other half desperately trying to find reasons to justify it. “Say what you want of me,” your Lucifer says quietly-- dangerously. “I did not come here to go back empty-handed.”

HIs alterself looks at you, searching for something in your face, before pushing you towards Asmo who holds you back. (And you wonder if there was something in his eyes that could rival what your Lucifer had or if you had only conjured up something you hoped to see.) With a flourish of wings, the other Lucifer remarks dryly, “Then I suspect... you will not return at all.”

It’s ironic to think that the two men ready to fight each other to the death are the only ones whom you have not made a pact with. You wonder if you could have. You wonder if both Lucifers would let you.

But as of now, you can only drop to the floor, wallowing in the turmoil of seeing the man you love destroy himself, screaming until your throat is hoarse even though your words go unheard.

In some ways, Barbatos was right. There could only be one timeline-- and you never had a choice in choosing which one it would be.

[firstknightss]

GWAINCELOT ESSAY THREE???

[commentary voice] ah yes and this gwaincelot essay.... which turned into a fic was inspired by @nextstopparis and @little-ligi

GWAINE TEACHING LANCELOT HOW TO READ. and thats how they actually CONFESS.

imagine gwaine seeing lancelot trip up reading leon’s plan for the day, seeing him trying to understand it. and gwaines, hes a little in love. Hes. Hes a little hit with feelings for this Noble (tm) knight. So OF COURSE he CANT EMOTION and he tries to show his affection for lancelot without yknow being in ‘loVE’

he comes over with his swishy hair and bantery tone like “oooOhHh LANCELOT! Lancey! Hey! Hello! Can’t read leon’s goddamn awful handwriting huh?”

And Lancelots embarrassed and flushes red and gwaine thinks hes Fucked Up (and he really doesn’t want to fuck this up, this is the first time he’s actually felt emotions this deep for someone) and tries to fix it panickedly, like the Anxiety Clown He Is.

He keeps on saying sorry and apologising, and Lancelot, the EVER CALM KNIGHT GUY, goes “it’s fine, it’s okay. It’s nothing to do with you...” and then he hesitates. He HESITATES. “....it’s just that...” and then he BITES HIS LIP and gwaine thinks he might just faint there and then, “...i cant read.”

and now it hits him, gwaine, gwaine, who thought literacy was something trash and something he didn’t really need, realises how important it is. and so, yknow because hes kind of wrapped in those Emotions (tm), he pulls lancelot’s sleeve after practice, when they’re alone in the changing room. (and if lancelot wasn’t so tired and miserable, he would have easily seen gwaine BLUSH)

And he, shyly asks if lancelot wouldnt mind being tutored by him.

Now Lancelot is OVERJOYED, and he’s borderline CRYING because lancelot, poor old village boy lancelot who’d been kicked out of the knights of camelot, and had to become a MERCENARY and fight for masters who didn’t care for him, has NEVER HAD someone literally CARE about him so much. (Apart from Merlin. He loves merlin <3)

so now imagine lancelot waking up an hour early the next morning, and showing up into gwaine’s room. He knows gwaine literally doesnt sleep with a lock, so he just barges in, and starts shaking gwaine.

Now GWAINE sleeps like a Log (had so much shit going on irl, time to sleep it away) and when he opens his bleary eyes, seeing lancelot in one of his stupid v neck shirts over him, hes like “....h...helo??”

and lancelot’s all like. “We- werent YOU gonna give me reading lessons.” And gwaine nods, yawning (and in that moment lancelot thinks gwaine looks unimaginably cute, so cute that he wants to literally ruffle gwaine’s hair and run his hands through how silky and brown it is.)

THEN gwaine pulls on the dont care-ish mask, and makes his arms into a pillow under his head, as he leans against the wall behind his bed, in some kind of somewhat???flirty??? manner??? [i dont...i dont know what hes trying to do. On the other hand! Not does Lancelot :) ]

Lancelot, does not realise this is gwaine’s poor attempt at flirting - since he’s seen gwaine ACTUALLY flirting and this is like. Nothing. And its also poorly executed. Which is NOTHING like gwaine.

So he pulls gwaine’s arm, and half hauls him out of bed.

As gwaine’s head crashes into lancelot’s stomach, he can smell lancelot’s clothes. They smell of flowers, and cotton and everything so natural and gwaine, who literally smells of wine, and wood and Tavern. (And aftershave, or the 500AD equivalent)

[see here, see im trying to bring themes of dionysis okay. OkayyyyyyyyY. yours truly likes looking at greek mythology. And both these two complete dionysis]

Gwaine, in his sleepy stupor, nestles his head on Lancelot’s hip, who gives a sigh and stands there. One hand clutching gwaine’s, leaving the other free.....

....to rake through his soft, flowy brown hair. And twirl his fingers through its waves, and Gwaine cuddles in further.

And since Lancelot left the door open, Leon (the other bitch who wakes up at 4am to do idk nothing) sees them two...like that, illuminated by the SUNLIGHT behind them, and smiles a little.

And then he trips over the stairs, the moment is lost.

Gwaine and Lancelot pull away at the same time, and gwaine’s face turns back to “ha ha im a Jerk (tm)” and if he wasnt too busy trying to hide how flustered he was, he’d see Lancelot looking at him the way he used to look at GWEN.

They both blink and look at each other, understandingly, neither of them to speak of this again.

And then Gwaine drags himself out of bed, and Lancelot raises his eyebrows as he watches him (totally not checking him out) haul out a book from his cupboard.

Gwaine’s too sleepy for this, he keeps yawning and rubbing his eyes (looking like a cat, Lancelot notes) and Lancelot takes a deep breath, his eyes understanding.

“We don’t have to do this if you don’t want to.”

“Lancelot, I love..” he bites his tongue, cursing his half asleep mind “..doing this, and love hanging out with you...I just cant stay up this early.”

Reading lessons, from now on, are at 1:30am-whenever Gwaine and Lancelot stop rambling about Odysseus and Circe and Telemachus

[i dont know any other ancient books apart from like. Ancient greek/Roman ones. So i guess. Its not historically accurate,,,,BUUIT this is a fanfic for a pair who had like no scenes together SO i think i can take some ✨creative liberties✨]

Lancelot has heard of the journey of Aneas from travelling bards, singing songs in his native old english. Gwaine’s eyes are quick at latin, and he learnt the flaws of Romulus and Remus in his pure latin. Gwaine’s a good teacher, and lancelot is a quick study, and it’s not long before they’re arguing over which Goddess caused the most harm in the Illiad.

Gwaine’s never met someone who he could reveal that he loved reading to, he loved doing.

Lancelot’s never met someone who he could tell he couldn’t read, and ask if they could teach him, love learning.

They make it work.

The other knights notice, of course they notice. Percival notices how Lancelot stumbles into the Gwaine’s room at night, bright eyed. Elyan notices Lancelot and Gwaine’s voices from Gwaine’s room opposite him; sometimes slow, Gwaine speaking slowly and Lancelot following; sometimes heated and passionate.

(They’re arguing. They’re arguing about how to pronounce Minerva)

Merlin finds the two, in the early hours of the morning - when the birds are figuring what song they sing today - on Gwaine’s bed.

Gwaine leaned against the bedframe, his trousered legs splayed over the sheets. Loosely braided, long brown hair fell over his closed eyelids, his mouth in a small smile.

And Merlin follows his arm draped over Lancelot, snuggled beside him, his head on his broad shoulder, every breath of wind pushing against curly black hair, making it almost /bounce/. His eyes are covered by the other man’s hair, and he looks...content. More content than Merlin has ever seen him.

He slips out as quietly as he came in, and smirks, hes gotta tell arthur they finally got their shit together oh GOD

Its no surprise to anyone but them, when Arthur pulls Lancelot out of training, and into his chambers.

“I’m glad you’ve found someone Lancelot.” He starts, his face geniune, his voice giving away hints of relief. (He thought he was never going to see his knight smile again after all the ordeals that had happened to him)

“Oh...” Lancelot’s heart sinks, “...how did you find out, Sire?”

Arthur blinks, taking in the change of mood in Lancelot, maybe it wasn’t anything important, maybe they were trying to keep it casual, hell they didnt want the king knowing.

“I- uh, I just noticed...” Goddamnit Merlin, and Goddamn his need to tell him everything he saw. (Merlin had advised him not to do this, as they sat on his bed after a long night. This was really his fault.)

Lancelot pales, and he places his hands down on the table beside him, palms slapping stone as he did so.

“Well, I guess I should tell you the whole truth then,” his voice is quiet, and Arthur steps closer, “Sire I am not of Noble birth, and was born in a village - as you know.”

Arthur nods, his arms crossed, but his Kingly Bravado fell away at the sight of his knight, and one of his closest friends, being this vulnerable.

“Yes I know, but what does this ha-“

“And we children in the village we-“ he falters, “-we were never taught to read.”

“Yes, no I understand, I-“ he pauses, Lancelot’s words hitting him a bit too late, this was about literacy?

This, this whole conversation was about literacy?

Not being gay?

Merlin was going to have a field day

“Sire?”

“I understand Lancelot, and is this why you feel a little out of place with the other knights?” He carries it on, with a smile, he has a few questions to ask merlin.

“Yes, and that’s why I asked Gwaine to tutor me from time to time, although, the sessions carry through late into the night, which may have been affecting my performance at practice. I’ll have you know that this is a temporary th-“

“It’s fine Lancelot,” Arthur places a hand on his shoulder, “You are still exceptional at practice,”

“Thank you Sire,” Lancelot twinkles.

✨

“Theyre, theyre not together?” Merlin cant stop laughing, tears streaming down his face, “theyre not TOGETHER?? oh my God arthur what did you DO”

They sit together on Arthur’s bed, drinking wine from stemless cups together, with Arthur recounting the events of the day; red faced.

“I mean, it was your idea Merlin.”

“I just saw them, and I assumed...I didnt...I didnt think youd ASK them.”

“What do you think I’d do then?? Let them be on their merry way.”

“Yes!”

✨

“Do you like me?” Gwaine asks, unexpectedly, one night, the moon vibrant against the loud sea.

“You’re...tolerable...” Lancelot says, a smile tugging at his lips, as the silver moonlight falls against his hair, a halo around him.

✨

The knights give them the look every morning, as the two of them stumbled out of the same room, more frequently than ever.

Sometimes Lancelot would throw on Gwaine’s shirt, when he’d crumpled his own beyond repair. Sometimes Gwaine would put some of Lancelot’s hair oil on, when his hair was frizzy.

They gave each other knowing looks when Gwaine and Lancelot started whispering and giggling like a bunch of schoolgirls.

✨

And then Stupid gwaine had to go get fucking stabbed, and their delicate dance was like trying to waltz through a minefield.

Lancelot clutches onto Gwaine’s arm as Merlin feels his forehead with shaking hands.

“He’s burning up.”

“Infection...?” Lancelot sounds broken, and nods, fumbling with his pack to find some bandages.

It was just a simple quest; a save the day, get the girl, do various harmless shenanigans type of quest.

He’d half expected Gwaine to get the girl, and he cant help but give out a half choked laugh. Gwaine had no idea what hit him when she turned out to be the evil one all along.

He tries to forget that Gwaine showed no interest in her, he tries to forget that Gwaine’s been less frequent at the Tavern, he tries to forget that he hasn’t seen Gwaine with anyone since months now.

Gwaine, his beautiful Gwaine was lying on his lap, hot red blood rushing from his side, staining his polished chainmail with dark, sticky blood.

He’s been out for nearly an hour now, and Lancelot remembers carrying him, through the entire forest, forgetting his sword and his helmet and just grabbing Gwaine and getting the shit out of there.

Gwaine’s lack of self preservation was really rubbing off on Lancelot nowadays.

Merlin watches as Lancelot holds back tears, his own eyes stinging. Gwaine can’t die like this, he can’t die like this....

“hælan beorn adl”

Merlin’s eyes flashed gold, and Lancelot could feel warmth coming back into the fingers he was grabbing.

He was coming back.

And then the weight of everything hits him.

He was in Fucking Love.

✨

“Hey.” Gwaine’s voice is rough from disuse, but Lancelot nearly sobs when he hears the voice.

“Don’t fucking do that to me again, amor meus.” He puts his head down on Gwaine’s chest; finding the hammering of his heart calming.

He shimmies onto Merlin’s bed, which Gwaine had been lying in for the past few days.

“Did you mean, ami meus?” Gwaine sounds tired, too tired to be awake.

“Huh? Did i say something else?” Lancelot decides to play dumb, a sparkle in his eyes,

“I thought I heard amor meus,” Gwaine pushes his nose into Lancelot’s hair, taking in the wonderful smell of coconut.

“Well then, at least your hearing’s okay, amor meus.”

Gwaine gulped, and was sure Lancelot could hear his loud swallow.

“Lancelot, I hope this isnt a big joke with me teachin you latin and all,” Gwaine’s voice is a little wobbly from the slee deprivation and the magic and the pain numbers, “because I’ll have you know that I really love you, and I cant go on like this any longer,”

“Its okay Gwaine, I learnt latin from the man I love, of course it’s not a joke.”

“The man you love? Who’s tha-“

Realisation hits him like a brick.

Oh.

Oh.

“Me?” His voice cracks, and Lancelot looks up, a smirk on his face.

“Of course dumbass.”

“Like I’m meant to know that,” Gwaine tries to keep his dont care-ish aura, but they both know he’s too exhausted to keep that up.

“mmm?”

Gwaine kisses him on the nose, and he wraps himself around him.

And thats how Merlin finds them later that day, eyes blinking as he stood there.

✨

“I’m glad you’ve found someone, Lancelot.” Arthur coughs.

“Is that what that whole talk was about???”

“Answer the question.” His words sound harsh, but he’s barely hiding a smile.

“I’m glad too, I’m Glad I found Gwaine too.” Lancelot blushes, turning to gwaine.

“Why are you asking anyway, Princess?”

“Oh just, making sure this time.”

[jinnyu]

51 blind!femreader with raihan

Do it coward

Used artwork credit here

A/N: Says the one who wont come off anon. I really like the idea of this one, i get to express my headcanon of Raihan being a soff and gentle boi- nonetheless, thanks for the ask! Hopefully you'll like it.

Oh and im making this into a two part mini fanfic—

╞═════𖠁𐂃𖠁═════╡

Gallade carefully held your hand as he leads you to the nearest pokemon center in Hammerlocke; the knight-like pokemon made sure you took your steps correctly as one of his hands were on your back, supporting you.

You were thankful that your mom gave you Ralts when you were a little kid, in which ralts evolved into a male kirlia when your mom accidentally exposed it to a dawn stone. Nonetheless, it didn't stop you from giving him the same love and affection as you did before— Gallade grew fond of you too as he watches you grow up into a bright individual, not losing hope even if you've lost your sense of sight from the moment you were born.

Many memories were made ever since then, especially when you participated in the gym challenge together with your trusted pokemon. Some challengers you've met immediately looked down on you the first time they saw you, and some are quite the opposite, treating you kindly and competing with you healthily. Luckily, your Gallade is always there to protect you if someone ever dares to lay a finger on you, same with your bestfriend Hop.

You're just grateful that you didn't have to go through this alone, yknow?

But, apparently the environment in the Dragon Type Gym wasn't that friendly, and it didn't go well. Before you started you challenge with the dragon tamer himself, you were challenged by a group of teens, who obviously looked down on you since they noticed that you weren't 'normal'; the battle itself was gruelling, but Gallade manages to bring you back to safety, along with Gardevoir.

Before the battle, the group of teens muttered harsh words about you, speaking about how you shouldn't advance forwards to the next gym leader since that its evident on how defeat is imminent considering your conditions.

However, you were somewhat used to these type of insults ever since you were a child. Your bullies helped you in the process of toughening up yourself, and you did it quite well— it's just that one of them said something in particular which leads to you feeling empty and.. hopeless.

Gallade took a notice in your behavior and decided that he will give your opponent no mercy in the battle afterwards, Gardevoir agreed on helping him too, seeing you feeling down because of their simple words and stingy mouths.

They then tried cheering you up when the battle ended, you replied with a soft smile and told your pokemon that you're going to be alright, and that they should focus on the oncoming match with the dragon type gym leader himself.

Gardevoir went back into your pokeball as Gallade stayed outside, guiding you to the pokemon center.

╞═════𖠁𐂃𖠁═════╡

Back to the present, you got all your pokemon healed up and everything was back to normal. Though you wasn't sure if Gallade was alright since he stayed outside this whole time to help you get where you are.

"Gallade, do you need to recover?" You said as your hand tried to reach the pokemon's shoulder, and the knight-like pokemon was quick to hold your hand and lead it to where his shoulder was, followed by a cheerful sound emitted from the pokemon himself. He seemed like he didn't need to recover, hence he lets out that sound from earlier; you only laughed and gave his shoulder a light pat, muttering a trail of soft 'okay's afterwards.

Even so, you tried to take out a few of the snacks you bought from the vending machine, rummaging through your bag as you relied on you sense of touch to find the said item. After awhile, you felt your hand pressing on the texture of what it seems to be a plastic; you made sure it was the correct item you was going for, shaking it twice before finally taking it out of your bag.

You gave your pokemon the snack, accompanied with a bright grin. Even if you're not able to see your Gallade's reactions, you could feel him happily accepting the snack you gave him and tearing it open, immediately munching on the food.

Well, as long your pokemon is happy, you're happy too.

While Gallade was busy enjoying himself with his snack, you walked around the pokemon centre, trying to find a seat to put your bag down and take a moment to relax yourself. You knew walking around yourself anywhere was a bad idea when you didn't have your guide pokemon with you, but you did it anyways, wanting to be independent for once and not trouble your pokemon. Gallade already did so much for you, its only fair that you shouldn't trouble him when you got the chance, after all, its only the pokemon centre, how hard can it be to find a seat? Surely its there, somewhere.

You began taking small steps with your hand reaching out infront of you, making sure you wouldn't bump onto a wall or something while you were walking. "So far so good" you said to yourself as you wandered around the area, not bumping into anyone or anything.

Your hand was touching the wall for support, while the other one was facing down, trying to grasp the texture of a table....if you ever managed to find one, that is.

But apparently, all you found was a person as you bumped into their side, or assumingly it was their side; your sudden act of foolishness was followed by a sound of 'oof' coming from your side, and a sound of "ah?" From their side, probably from not expecting this happening.

"Im so sorry" you apologized as you looked up, trying to angle your head to face their own gaze. You assumed the person was taller than you since most of the people you met are taller than you. Gallade finally picked up on what's happening and rushed to your side, apologizing too in your stead and hoping that the person would understand your condition.

The person, luckily, said it was alright and it wasn't a big deal— though Gallade thought the person was familiar from hearing Hop's stories back then. The pokemon looked at you, then looked back at the person, wondering if his guesses was correct; the Duralodon beside him was also curious after watching Gallade's behavior.

Duraludon notices that you were wearing the challenger uniform, in which it immediately informed it's trainer.

"Dura duraaa!!" It chirped as the man looked at it, then looking at your direction.

A grin then appeared on his lips as he began to notice your uniform too "Oh, you're a challenger?" He asked you in a relaxed tone; a huff of relief pass your lips as you thanked Arceus that the man wasn't mad for your foolish behavior. You then immediately answered him

"Yes! I am!"

You were happy that they didn't leave a harsh comment on how you were lacking one of your senses too, in which most people do the first second they notice it.

The man then proceeded on taking a card from his pocket and handed it to you. Of course you didn't understand anything that's happening for obvious reasons, but Gallade helped you by taking the card from him and giving it to you.

This made the man confused; why didn't you take his card? Why did your pokemon take it instead? Though it might be an impolite question to ask in the first time of meeting someone, he felt like he should ask, just to prevent future miscommunications and other unpleasant things from happening.

"My apologies if this sounded rude but," here it goes, you heard the first sentence and braced yourself to answer it the moment the person finishes it. "Are you visually impaired?" He asked politely, and he didn't even use the word 'Blind'!! This just shows how much he was trying to not disrespect you and ask in the most polite way.

The man's words made you feel happy and glad that he tried to be polite to you— polite to someone who's assumingly younger than him. You then replied with a nod as Gallade chirped beside you as if he's thanking the man infront of you from not disrespecting his trainer.

Duraludon seemed happy too after finding out your condition, it was accepting and welcoming, much like it's trainer.

He then muttered "Ah i see i see" after getting your response. Maybe you thought that the man was thinking about how it was quite rare to see a challenger like yourself, visually impaired and all of that, needing a guide pokemon to help you in your daily life— and here you are, living and breathing like the others. There's nothing different about you really, its just that people failed to see that and often take the action on bullying you because you were lacking one of your senses.

"Well then,"

The man spoke once again as you looked at him on the face, letting him know that you're listening to him.

"I'm Raihan, nice to meet you"

[ridiculousn3sswrites]

Please Mami

*Anthony Ramos x Reader

*Request: ‘Anonymous asked: Can you do an Anthony Ramos x reader where he begs like mars in She’s gotta have it??. Yknow, that cute little “please mami, please mami, mami mami please, por favor?” Lmao there’s a vid on YouTube for reference if you don’t know what I’m talking about (Mars Blackmon || Anthony Ramos)’

*Warnings: References to not-PG times, minor argument. Let me know if I missed anything.

*A/N: Okay I’m back from my little break, thanks to everyone for understanding. Also welcome to the resurgence of the Hamilton fandom. (This was gonna be a smut one but I have a different prompt thing I wanna use for my first smut fic and I’m thinking it’s gonna be with Bucky Barnes but lemme know if you guys have any suggestions for who it should be with.)

My Ko-Fi if you want to support my writing

**********

When Anthony got the role of Mars, you were overjoyed for him. The goofy character really fit your boyfriend, and when you actually sat down to watch the show with him, you were immensely proud of him. The downside of watching the show with him right next to you was that Anthony immediately noticed your reactions to everything. You were laying on the couch with Anthony behind you, his arm lazily draped over your middle, when he first said those lines that would become a fan favorite.

“Please mami. Please mami. Mami mami please. Por favor,” Mars was telling Nola on the tv in front of you. You couldn’t help your reaction, tensing a little at the pleading but teasing tone he took on. There was just something about it that you couldn’t quite place, and of course Anthony noticed it.

“What’s up, baby?” Anthony asked, pressing a kiss to your cheek, then another to your neck. A shiver of anticipation ran through your body, even though the actions were mostly innocent. You tried to laugh it off, turning your head so you could look at him better.

“It’s nothing, let me watch the show,” you said, focusing on keeping your voice steady. If Anthony figured out what was going on, you’d never hear the end of it. You turned back to the tv, hoping that would be the end of it.

“C’mon, tell me,” Anthony whined, now pressing his face into the side of your neck. “What’s got you so tense? Please, Mami?”

There was no hiding the pause you took then, and Anthony definitely noticed. He sat back a little, trying to catch your eye, but you kept your stare at the tv. “Shut up,” you finally muttered, trying to ignore the heat in your face.

You were trying to avoid Anthony’s gaze, and when you chanced a glance from the corner of your eye, you could see the small grin on his face. “So that’s what’s up?” Anthony immediately teased, eyes lighting up at the new information.

“I said shut up,” you groaned.

“Don’t be embarrassed, baby. At least you got turned on by me and not someone else.” Of course that’s what he would focus on. Now that he had something against you, you knew he’d use it sooner or later. 

“Please let’s never talk about this again,” you practically begged. Anthony shook his head, and by the grin on his face, you knew he would bring it up again eventually.

“Fine, I’ll leave you alone for now.” Anthony pressed his face back into the side of your neck. You could feel his little smile again and it took everything in you not to swat at him. “I‘m warning you, I do that little begging thing a couple other times so if you can control yourself.”

“That’s not leaving me alone,” you whined. Anthony started peppering kisses to your face, and it didn’t take long for you to dissolve into laughter. The second he saw you weren’t actually mad at him, Anthony pressed his lips against yours, drawing you into a sweet kiss. You broke it after a couple seconds, just looking at Anthony with a small smile before you spoke again. “C’mon, lemme watch the show.”

**********

You were right. Once it became obvious Anthony had something over you, he began using it to his advantage pretty much any chance he got. He wanted you to go to an event that you didn’t really feel like going to? He did the little begging thing, and then you were off getting ready to go meet up with the others. Anthony came home late from the studio when the two of you had plans for a night in? He begged a little, and you quickly forgot why you were upset. If Anthony was in any sort of trouble with you, all it took was two words: “Please mami.”

There was one night that you were determined you weren’t going to give in to him, no matter how attractive you found that little begging thing. Before you left for work that morning, you asked Anthony to do three things before he left for the studio later: turn on the heater (just enough so the apartment wouldn’t be freezing when you got back), run the dishwasher (that you loaded with the exception of the plate and cup he was using when you left), and fold the laundry that was in the basket. You unlocked the door to your apartment, and instead of a nice rush of warmth meeting you, the apartment felt the same temperature as it was outside. Strike one.

You kept your coat on, going to turn on the heater. You were going to keep your coat on until it got warm enough, which should not have happened. Looking around the apartment, you hoped the heater was the only thing Anthony had forgotten about. You put your bag down on the sofa before going to the kitchen. You were going to grab a cup from the dishwasher when you noticed the light wasn’t turned on. There was supposed to be a white light on to let you know the dishes were done, but since Anthony didn’t run the dishwasher, there was no light. You looked in the sink and sure enough, there were the dishes he used in the morning. Strike two.

The apartment was finally starting to warm up so you took off your coat, deciding to forgo getting water. You went to the room, hoping Anthony had at least folded the clothes you asked him to. Apparently that was too much to hope for when you saw the basket at the foot of your bed. Strike three. A groan just seemed to rip itself out of you, but you didn’t have the patience to actually deal with it. You grabbed one of Anthony’s hoodies from the laundry basket and just went to go shower.

Standing under the hot water, you tried to organize your thoughts. You’d asked Anthony to do a few things before he left for the studio that day, of which he did none. You knew Anthony worked a lot on his music, and it wasn’t necessarily easy work, but you worked too, and you still did housework that needed to be done. You never really asked Anthony to do much around the apartment, so when you asked him to do things, you expected them to get done. It was perfectly reasonable for you to be upset, and you weren’t going to give in to him so easily.

When Anthony got home, he found you in bed, working on your laptop in just his hoodie (from what he could see). He smiled at the sight, a warmth blooming in him at the sight of you. “Hey, baby. How was work?”

You looked up from your laptop, looking back at the screen before you answered him. “It was alright. I had to stay a little late but it wasn’t too bad.”

Anthony was a little confused at your short answer. Normally by now you’d be in some story about your coworkers, and even though he didn’t really understand your office dynamics, he always liked hearing the stories. He sat at the foot of the bed, reaching for your hand. When you pulled it back from him, he knew something was wrong. “What’s up? Did something happen at work?”

“No, work was fine. My issue happened when I got home,” you said, looking at him once again. You could practically see his thought process as he tried to remember what he did. Once it hit him, he turned to you with the most apologetic look.

“I forgot to do what you asked me to,” Anthony said. “Baby, I’m so sorry. I was writing something new and just lost track of time, then I was running late to the studio-”

You put up your hand to stop his rambling. “Anthony, I don’t need excuses right now. I didn’t ask you to do much. The only thing that would have taken a little while is the laundry. I know you work a lot, but I do too and I still do things that need to be done.”

“I know, baby, please forgive me? Please, mami?” Anthony was looking up at you with those damn puppy dog eyes and you were this close to giving in. But no, you needed to stand your ground, even if it was just this once.

“And that! You always do that when you even think I’m mad at you. Like yeah, it’s attractive, but you can’t just do that every time you’re in the slightest bit of trouble,” you argued, even though you kept your voice soft. This wasn’t really something you felt the need to yell about, you just needed Anthony to know. Anthony nodded, not wanting to say anything just yet.

“Yeah, I get you. I’m sorry, baby. I know you do a lot around here and I gotta help out more. I’m gonna go shower, wait up for me?” Anthony asked, standing up. You nodded, and Anthony gave you a soft smile before leaving the room. You closed your laptop and placed it on the nightstand, not sure if you were actually willing to wait for him or if you just wanted to go to sleep. It took a few seconds of internal debate before you finally just laid in bed, looking through Twitter as you waited for Anthony.

The day’s events caught up to you as you laid in bed, your entire body filling with exhaustion as you scrolled on your phone. Just as you were a second away from dropping your phone on your face, Anthony came back in the room. As soon as you saw him, you put down your phone. You’d fulfilled your promise, now you were okay to go to sleep. You heard Anthony saying something as you were already drifting off, but you didn’t have enough energy to focus on what he said. The light turned off, and then you felt the weight of his arm around you, pulling you close to him as you fell asleep.

At some point in the night, you woke up for a few seconds as Anthony left the bed. You remembered saying some gibberish in your half-asleep state and Anthony laughing before telling you to go back to sleep. The next time you woke up, the sun was streaming in through your window, but the bed beside you was still cold. You patted the bed as if Anthony would magically appear if you managed to reach far enough, but after a couple seconds you gave up and decided to go looking for him in the apartment. As far as you knew, the both of you had the day off and had no plans, so Anthony should still be home.

When you walked out of the bedroom, you could already tell something was different. It took you a second, but then you realized one of your cleaning candles was lit - the candles you only lit after completely cleaning the apartment. You didn’t think much of it - after all, Anthony didn’t really know the difference between your cleaning candles and your normal candles - but when you got to the living room, you saw why it was lit.

Anthony was in the kitchen, putting food on two plates. From where you were standing, you couldn’t see any dishes on the stove or on the counter. Even more than Anthony apparently doing the dishes as he cooked, you saw that the kitchen and living room were completely cleaned, which you were supposed to do that day. “Babe, what time did you wake up?” You asked.

Anthony jumped slightly at your voice, immediately pouting when he looked up and you were standing pretty much in front of him. “You weren’t supposed to be awake yet. I was gonna bring you breakfast in bed.”

“Sorry I ruined your surprise.” You wanted to laugh, but you could tell Anthony probably wouldn’t want to hear that. “But really, what time did you wake up?”

“I dunno, like five? I couldn’t really sleep because I know I let you down, so I wanted to do something for you,” he explained, rubbing the back of his neck. “I didn’t want you mad at me, especially since this is the first day in a while we can just chill.”

You closed the little distance between the two of you, wrapping your arms around his waist as you looked up at him. “I wasn’t mad-“ Anthony narrowed his eyes the second you said that- “okay, so I was a little mad. I just need you to do the small things when I ask you to, all right?”

“Of course, and I swear Imma get better at it. I mean, I live here too, you shouldn’t be the one doing all the housework.” Anthony wrapped his arms around your waist, forcing you to move yours around his neck. The two of you just stood like that for a minute, looking at each other and enjoying the feeling of being in the other’s arms. Anthony was the one to break the silence. “Do you forgive me?”

You had to bite back your smile at the look on his face, he was like a little kid who got caught doing something he wasn’t supposed to. “I dunno, it was hell waiting for the apartment to warm up when I got home,” you decided to tease him instead.

“Aw come on, baby, I’m sorry. Forgive me? Please, mami? Please, mami? Mami mami please. Por favoooorrr,” Anthony whined, stretching out the last word. You couldn’t help the burst of giggles at his antics, only getting worse once he began pressing kisses all over your face. “Please, mami?”

“Okay, okay, I give,” you laughed. “And not just because you did that.”

“Nah, yeah, I didn’t think that’d be the reason.” Anthony beamed down at you. You had a second before Anthony suddenly picked you up, your legs instinctively wrapping around his waist. Once he was sure he wasn’t going to drop you, he pressed a sound kiss to your lips. You quickly found yourself lost in the kiss, barely registering the fact that Anthony was walking.

“Babe, the food you made’s gonna get cold,” you broke the kiss to say once you realized he was walking to the bedroom.

“That’s fine,” he muttered, kissing your neck. A shiver ran through you, and you knew you were about two seconds from completely giving in to him. It would be just in time too, considering you were already in your bedroom. “Please, mami?”

And there it was. “Alright, but don’t complain when the food doesn’t taste as good.”

“I wouldn’t dream of it.”

**********

Permanent Tag List: @treatallwithkindness

[sachigram]

So uhh about the Suizaya prompts thing 👉🏽👈🏽 I have one that I would love to see. Yknow shinra is like a really bad friend to izaya? Like in the novels it’s explained deeper but basically their friendship is so toxic (in izaya aside like bruh, the toxic man himself is in the receiving end of the toxicity); I would like to see Shizuo noticing how much shinra doesn’t care about izaya through small things that izaya or shinra mention offhandedly (thanks I if you write it! Have. A good week!)

((You said small things and I almost killed Izaya. Sorry, my hands slipped.))

Shizuo notices it by accident.

He doesn't pay much attention to anything that happens with Izaya's personal life. Hell, Shizuo really doesn't know anything about Izaya aside from him being threat to humanity. He doesn't think of Izaya as the type of person to have relationships with anyone, much less as the type of person to put up with a relationship that's just...kind of cruel to him?

It starts with an offhanded comment, the kind of thing Shizuo thinks he's supposed to brush off or ignore completely.

“You're not injured, are you?” Shinra asks when he answers the door. It isn't an unusual question; Shizuo doesn't come over often, and when he does, it's usually so Shinra can patch him up.

“Nope. I'm here to see Celty. And, uh. You, by association, I guess,” Shizuo says, stepping inside. He kicks his shoes off in the hall.

“Oh, okay!” Shinra chirps, not one to be easily offended. “Just making sure. I already had to put Izaya-kun back together, and I didn't really want to work on two friends in a day.”

“The flea's injured?” Shizuo asks. He's happy to hear it, though he'd rather be the one to bash Izaya up, as he's the one who's earned it most.

“Yeah, it was pretty bad. Anyway, Celty is making dinner, and you're welcome to have some!”

Shizuo frowns. He doesn't pretend to understand Shinra's friendship with Izaya, though the two of them were attached at the hip in middle school, and then through most of high school whenever Izaya actually bothered to show up. Shinra says Izaya is his friend, but sometimes, Shizuo doesn't feel like he means it, or maybe just doesn't understand what friendship means.

Maybe Shinra and Izaya have that in common.

“Who got him? I owe someone a drink,” Shizuo says. He waves at Celty, who is wearing an apron and stirring something in a pan.

“He wouldn't tell me. I didn't want to go over there at all, but it was a request from Shiki-san.” Shinra hums and pours himself and then Shizuo some hot sake. “Shiki-san isn't really the type of person to say 'no' to. I ended up covered in blood. Totally ruined my plans this afternoon.”

“Oh,” Shizuo says. He drinks the sake, grateful for the warmth that spreads through him. He was starting to feel a little cold, but maybe that's just from Shinra's tone.

“Izaya-kun just gets into things, you know? He went and got himself shot—“

“Shot?” Shizuo asks. He can't say he's surprised, but at the same time, if someone shot Izaya, that means they were serious.

Shinra makes a face, and then he pours them both another drink.

“Yeah. He died on me once, but I had to make sure he lived so I could yell at him for ruining mine and Celty's lunch date.” Shinra smiles then and tips his cup against Shizuo's. “Anyway, he won't be bothering you for a while. There's still a chance he could just up and die! Shiki-san seemed pretty worried.”

Shizuo just stares at Shinra while Shinra drinks. Shizuo puts his cup on the table, looks down at it.

“That's kind of... I don't know. Aren't you worried, too?”

“Huh? Why?” Shinra asks, and it's such an earnest question that Shizuo doesn't know what to make of it.

“Don't you care if he dies?” Shizuo asks.

“I care! I just...” Shinra puts his finger to his chin and pauses, lost in thought. “I guess it's because Izaya-kun always does what he wants, and he doesn't listen to anything anyone says. I've been prepared a long time to hear that someone killed him. I've been prepared to hear you've killed him. I can't say he wouldn't deserve it.”

Shizuo thinks of all the time he's spent in hospitals, injured, angry, hurting. His brother was there, and his parents were there, and Shinra, though he was an awful pest, he was there, too.

“That's fucked up,” Shizuo says. “You're treating him like he's dead already.”

“I guess so!” Shinra says, and he just smiles again. “That's how Izaya-kun likes to be treated.”

Shizuo doesn't stay for dinner. He feels unsettled, and he wishes he didn't drink any sake at all, just because it feels sour in his stomach. Shizuo hates Izaya, and if he heard Izaya died, he can't say he would mourn. But at the same time, to hear Shinra say those things as if they don't matter...

It isn't right.

***

A month passes.

Shinra was right to say Shizuo wouldn't see or hear from Izaya for a while. Rumors spread that Izaya is dead, but Shinra assures Shizuo those are false. Again, Shinra says it in a “What can ya do?” kind of way, and it pisses Shizuo off for reasons he can't understand.

As shitty as Izaya is, he's a person, and he's a person who calls Shinra a friend. Shizuo wonders if Izaya knows how little Shinra seems to think of him, and Shizuo can't decide which option is worse, that Izaya doesn't know, or that he knows and accepts it.

It's been starting to rain a lot lately, and Shizuo is a little irritated he keeps forgetting an umbrella. He's stalking through the city, hands in his pockets, when suddenly an umbrella appears over his head. He looks up to see Celty, who waves at him cheerily.

“Oh, hey,” Shizuo says.

“You seem lost in thought.”

“Yeah, I guess I am.”

They move towards the park, away from people. Shizuo lights a cigarette, knowing Celty won't mind it.

“Anything you want to talk about?” Celty prompts. Shizuo exhales smoke, trying to think of how to word it.

“Is Izaya still alive?” he asks. He's been asking Shinra and Celty both that, periodically. Each time, they seem surprised.

“Yes. He's been messaging me about jobs he's lined up for next week. I'll be going out more often since Izaya can't go out himself, but I can't complain much. He's paying me a ton.”

“That's good.”

Celty's helmet cocks to the side, and then her fingers move again.

“You could go see him. Maybe this could be like a—“

“I know what you'll say, and I'm not reading it,” Shizuo says stubbornly, and Celty's shoulders slump. “I'm not making friends with that flea no matter how injured he gets.”

“Fine, fine. I can't say I blame you. It'd just...be nice if you worried less about what he's getting into.”

“Hm.”

Shizuo finishes his cigarette, and then he sighs. He's shitty with words, always has been, so he just does what he always does and blurts it out.

“Shinra is kind of an asshole.”

Celty looks at him in surprise, waiting for him to continue. He fidgets.

“Just, like. That stuff he said about Izaya. They're friends, right? I don't get why, but it's just kind of...” He trails off, and Celty uses the opportunity to type a response.

“I wouldn't feel too bad for Izaya, here. He wasn't exactly sympathetic when Shinra got attacked by that stalker!”

“Maybe they're both just shitty, then. Still, Izaya almost died, right? Just seems really fucked up.”

“I guess so...” Celty pauses. “If that happened to you, I'd be worried sick. Shinra is just... He doesn't think about other people like that. He doesn't worry about them.”

Shizuo lights another cigarette, noting that the rain isn't going to let up any time soon.

“I never thought I'd feel bad for the flea,” he mutters after a bit.

“I think... Well. I can't say for sure. I don't know Izaya very well, so don't hold me to this! From what I do know, Izaya doesn't really have anyone in his life. It seems like he's content to be that way, but sometimes I think he just doesn't know any better.”

Shizuo grumbles, hating that answer.

“It's sad, I agree. But he doesn't do much to make himself likable.”

Shizuo knows she's right, and he himself doesn't even like Izaya. More than that, he hates Izaya, has tried to kill Izaya more than once. It doesn't make sense for this to bother him like it does, but it does. It bothers him a lot. Somehow, it pisses Shizuo off just as much as if Izaya were here attacking him.

“I guess I just have a soft spot for people who think they don't deserve anything better,” Shizuo mutters, and he doesn't know why he says it, but when Celty's hand goes to his back, rubbing soothingly, he thinks maybe he knows exactly why he said it after all.

***

Shizuo feels incredibly out of his element as he walks into the posh lobby of Izaya's building. He's been here before, but never for a friendly visit, if that's even what this is. He tells himself he'll feel much better about all this bullshit once he sees Izaya is alive and well, and when Izaya inevitably turns into an antagonizing piece of shit, Shizuo can go back to hoping Izaya dies a painful, horrible death.

He goes into the elevator, and the closer he gets to the top floor, the weirder he feels. It's insane, isn't it, that he knows where Izaya lives, which apartment is his. He knows Izaya knows where he lives too, because Izaya has sent vaguely ominous letters in the mail, always signed, usually telling Shizuo to fuck himself in some roundabout way.

Izaya isn't the one who answers the door, which throws Shizuo off for some reason. It's a pretty woman with a mean face, and she's raising an eyebrow at Shizuo.

“Uh...” he starts.

“Yeah, I don't care. If you kill him, do me a favor and wait till I'm gone. I don't want to be a suspect, though I guess I would be anyway.”

“Namie-chaaaaaan, how could you?” Izaya's voice asks from somewhere. “Who is it? Don't just let anyone in!”

“It's your boyfriend,” she says, stepping aside so Izaya can see Shizuo. Izaya's head is barely visible as he peers over at Shizuo from his spot on the couch, but then Izaya is flopping back down with an audible 'thump'.

“He's fine, I guess,” Izaya says, and Shizuo stands there like a moron before stepping inside.

“I'm leaving,” the woman, Namie, says. She gives Shizuo a look, and then she crosses her arms while glaring at the back of the couch. “Don't call me when I'm home, I mean it. I'm not coming back over no matter how pitiful you are.”

“You will if I whine enough,” Izaya says, and then his hand can be seen, waving. “See you tomorrow.”

Namie leaves after gathering her things, and Shizuo waits until the door is closed before he moves closer.

Izaya doesn't look like someone who almost died, but then again, it's been over a month. Izaya is sprawled on the couch, a fuzzy blanket over him, and Shizuo can really only see Izaya's face, but Izaya looks as irritatingly perfect as always.

“What can I do for you, Shizu-chan? Did you come to kick me while I'm down? You could probably still twist your fingers in the wound! It's not healing quite right,” Izaya says, and Shizuo scowls at him.

“Shut up. I just wanted to see how shitty you look.”

“Mean. I didn't bother you when you got shot!”

“No, you just sent me a letter with a drawing of Swiss cheese on it.” Shizuo's lip twitches at the memory. It was a large envelope, but inside was only a tiny piece of paper with the doodle. Next to it, Izaya wrote, “This is you.”

“Oh, right! I hope you kept that. It was a gesture of good will.” Izaya winces as he sits up, and Shizuo fights the urge to help him, though he supposes Izaya must be well enough to be left on his own. “Anyway, I'm alive, so you can stop worrying about me.”

“As if I'd worry,” Shizuo says. He's glad Izaya has a sectional, because he can sit on the end of it without being anywhere near the flea. “I'm guessing you know who did it.”

“Mm-hmm.” Izaya reaches for the tea he has on the coffee table. “Yakuza. I only met him a few times.”

“So what'd you do to him?”

“Do?” Izaya asks, blinking up at Shizuo.

“Yeah, what'd you do to make him want to kill you?” Shizuo specifies.

“Oh. Nothing.” Izaya sips at his tea. “He was trying to kill anyone who works with Shiki-san. I didn't really have anything to do with it.” He offers a small shrug when Shizuo just goes on staring at him. “Business as usual, you know?”

“What the fuck? That's not business as usual!” Shizuo snaps. Izaya's eyes are wide, and Shizuo can see Izaya's pupils are dilated. He wonders if Izaya is still on painkillers, though it seems likely he probably is.

“He's already been dealt with. Shiki-san was pretty pissed. It's not as if Shiki-san likes me much, but it was a...” Izaya pauses and waves his hand around a bit. “A... A property dispute, I guess? Like, it was a clear message to Shiki-san that anyone could be dealt with, and then—well. They handled it.”

“A property dispute?” Shizuo asks incredulously.

“Yeah! I'm pretty much freelance, but I have a reputation with doing business with the Awakusu. It's not a secret. I'm usually not targeted for that, but...” Izaya shrugs again, spilling his tea a little, and it confirms Shizuo's suspicion that Izaya is high as hell, though it doesn't make Shizuo feel any better about the fact that Izaya just referred to himself as property of the Awakusu.

“You're stoned, huh? What pills are you on?” Shizuo asks.

“No clue! Something Shinra gave me. I haven't been taking them like I'm supposed to, but today was a rough day.” Izaya sips more tea. “You know how Shinra is. He just throws pills at you and tells you to shut up.”

“Yeah,” Shizuo says, frowning. “Has he been to see you?”

“Sure, for check-ups. He makes bank off me, so he can't lecture me too much.”

“He doesn't just come to spend time with you?” Shizuo asks, and Izaya furrows his brows like Shizuo is speaking another language entirely.

“Why would he do that?” Izaya asks, and it sounds so earnest and innocent, the opposite of Izaya.

“Isn't he your friend?” Shizuo is suddenly very glad Izaya is high. Maybe Izaya won't remember any of this later, or will think it was a dream.

“Well, yeah, but...” Izaya makes a face. “We aren't close.”

“Really? You used to be. Back in school, I mean.”

“You mean back when Shinra was required to be in a building without Celty for a few hours a day? It's not like... I mean, he mostly just followed me around.”

“So you almost died, and then you actually died and got brought back on the table, and Shinra just charged you and left?” Shizuo asks.

Izaya sways a bit, but he remains upright.

“Isn't that what he does with you?”

Shizuo thinks of hotpot at Shinra's, of barging in on Shinra just because he's in the neighborhood. It's true that Shizuo is closer with Celty, and without his friendship with her, he doesn't know how often he would see Shinra, but Shinra calls and checks in, visits sometimes, and very rarely charges Shizuo for medical work. Izaya makes a lot of money, and that could be why he's charged, but either way, Shizuo finds this visit is doing the exact opposite of making him feel better.

“I don't think Shinra is really a good friend to you, Izaya,” Shizuo says, and Izaya frowns.

“Oh.”

“Maybe you knew that already, though.”

“A little. I just kind of thought he didn't know how to be friends.” Izaya rubs at his eye, and for a terrifying second, Shizuo thinks Izaya is crying, but then he realizes Izaya just looks sleepy and very out of it. “I never blamed him, since I never wanted to be his friend in the first place, and also I'm really bad at it, too.” Izaya squints up at Shizuo. “Why're you here?”

“Wanted to see if you were dead yet,” Shizuo says, and Izaya nods.

“Not yet! You've gotta be the one to kill me, you know? Then everyone will see you're a monster.” Izaya reaches his teacup towards the table, misses, and glares as the cup shatters in the floor. Grumbling, Shizuo stands and goes into the kitchen, grabbing a towel. That 'monster' talk pisses him off like always, but the pity he feels for Izaya is watering it down to a tolerable level.

“You're a pain in my ass,” Shizuo informs Izaya, who merely watches as Shizuo mops up the tea. Shizuo is picking up the shards of glass when he feels a hand in his hair, and he glances over to see Izaya petting him sleepily.

“Good boy,” Izaya murmurs, and Shizuo wants to kill him, to throw him out the window, but instead he focuses on not cutting himself on the glass.

By the time the mess is cleaned, Izaya looks close to passing out. He's blinking up at Shizuo, his body covered by the blanket once more.

“I'm gonna go. You're not even sober.”

“Okay.”

“I might come back later, though. You're pretty tolerable like this, and I know you feel too shitty to attack me,” Shizuo says.

“You'll come back?” Izaya makes a face. “Why?”

“To see you, I guess. It sucks being too hurt to move much. I can't imagine how much it must suck to be alone during it.”

“You...just want to see me?” Izaya asks. He looks like he's thinking really hard about this. “You don't want anything?”

“Nope.”

“That doesn't make sense, Shizu-chan,” Izaya says.

“It does, actually.”

“Okay,” Izaya says, and he looks like he's trying very hard to be serious. Shizuo feels warmth in his chest as Izaya squints up at him, and Shizuo can't name the feeling, has no idea what it is, but it's definitely related to Izaya and how cute he is when he's not being an asshole.

“See ya, flea,”

Shizuo makes his way home, relieved it's not raining. It's a nice day out, and he thinks he might walk through the park before going in for the night.

He does feel better, though for different reasons than he expected. Izaya will be fine, in time, and the two of them can go back to fighting as always. Nothing really has to change, and there's a very good chance Izaya won't even remember their conversation, but Shizuo hopes he does.

[lixiescheesestick]

a/n: I couldnt think of a title so I'll just leave it here without xD

pairing: Seo Changbin x fem!Reader

genre: smut

wordcount: 1.8k

warnings: slight corruption kink, oral (female receiving), a bit of dirty talk

ㅡ

It was no secret that you were still a virgin. Pretty much everyone on campus knew, due to you being pretty much the last one. Even your best friend, Jisu, had lost hers a few months back. But then again, Jisu was a completely different personality compared to you.

She was the mischievous one of your friendship, and definitely a party animal. And since you each got older, her style changed into something more provocative. You on the other hand never changed much, staying shy and covering up as much skin as possible most days. You wore minimal make up and never went to parties.

Until tonight that was.

“Jisu! Don’t you think this skirt is a little too short?”, you called out of the bathroom, observing yourself in the mirror.

“Babes, we are going to a frat party, not a study group.” Jisu called back,”Now get your ass out here and lemme see you!”

And so you did, slowly emerging from your bathroom to see your best friend fully dressed up. She looked up from her phone as she heard you shuffling, gasping when she saw you.

“Y-Y/N… Oh my god! You look so gorgeous. At this rate all the boys there will be drooling over you.”

When Jisu said that you smiled admitting to yourself that you looked great. The black, leathery mini-skirt hugging your curves. The navy blue, silky shirt contrasting with its bottom piece perfectly.

“Now let’s get some makeup on you and get going. Jisung, is going to pick us up.” she explained, dragging you to her room to get you glammed up and ready.

-

The party could be heard from a street away, making you nervous. A swarm of uncomfortable butterflies erupting in your stomach.

“Hey, Y/N, it’ll be fine. I was nervous at my first party too. Trust me, they get more fun over time.” Jisu mumbled to you. You smiled at her and nodded.

As the car came to a halt, she grabbed your hand and led you inside. As soon as you got in, your nostrils were filled with a discomforting scent of alcohol. There was loud music bouncing around in your head as you were dragged in  a certain direction. From one moment to the other you were in a brighter room, hardly anyone occupying it other than people filling up their cups.

“So, what do you want? Punch, beer, malibu? They got everything.” Jisu said, holding a red cup in your direction.

“How about.. Water?” you asked, making your bestie break out into loud fits of laughter before just filling your cup with some sort of toxic looking mixture.

“What did I say earlier, Y/N?” she cocked an eyebrow.

You sighed, grabbing your cup and looking down.

“What I thought. Now come on let’s- Oh, Mia hi!” Jisu quickly walked in the direction of her friend leaving you behind. You knew she didn’t mean to, she was excited, but now there you were. Stood between a bunch of young adults grinding on each other with no other goal than to get into each other's pants by the end of the night.

You pushed your way through until you found a semi-empty corner. A few people sat around chatting and laughing together. You sat down on a free seat, observing the party. You scanned the crowd of people to see if you could find your friend, but instead your eyes landed on someone else.

He was stood by his friends, them being slightly taller. His hair black as well as his clothes, his look being mysterious. You didn't notice that you had been staring until you realized that he was looking back. His strong gaze made a warm jolt spread throughout your body, your thighs squeezing together slightly as a reflex.

He smirked, looking you up and down. You quickly broke eye contact after that, downing the rest of your drink before getting up and heading toward the kitchen for a new one.

You quickly took a random bottle and filled your cup and turned around to leave, only to walk into quite a hard surface. You didn't look up, quietly apologising and going to move around the figure before they stepped in front of you.

"Where do you think you're going, princess?" a playful voice asked, the male's arms crossing before his chest.

You looked up only to see the guy from before. Gulping when you realised how much better he looked close up.

"W-well I.. I was gonna.." you raised your hand in the direction of the party, unable to get out your sentence.

The man raised an eyebrow at you, chuckling at how flustered you seemed in front of him. He held out his hand in a gentlemanly fashion, though you knew his intentions were no where close to gentleman like.

"I'm Changbin. It's nice to meet you princess." he said.

You raised your hand, unsurely shaking his.

"I-I'm Y/N." you stuttered out.

"Well, Y/N." he spoke up, pulling you towards his chest with your conjoined hands to whisper in your ear. "I saw you eyeing me earlier. It was like you were basically undressing me with your eyes, hun. Why don't you and I walk down to my place and have some fun, hm?"

"I don't know.. I'm- I've never yknow." you muttered, the offer captivating but at the same time nerve wracking.

"Wait, you're still a virgin?" he asked, taking a step back and looking you in the eyes.

"Mhm.." you nodded. It was an odd situation, but coming to think of it you wouldn't mind losing your virginity. But maybe that was the alcohol talking.

"Well, how about we make your first time pleasurable. What do you say?" Changbin asked. He seemed eager but was still cautious.

You just shook your head, Changbin grabbing you by the other hand and walking in the direction of the front door.

And man, you had no idea what you had gotten yourself into.

-

As soon as the door shut, you were pressed against it. Changbins hands pinning your hips back as he kissed your lips as passionately as he could. Your hands just gripped the bottom of his shit, crunching up the fabric in your hands.

Slowly his lips trailed from yours to your neck, sucking around until he hit a certain spot that got you whining. His member hardening as he kept on thinking of corrupting you.

Changbin tugged your shirt over your head, chucking it behind him as his hands roamed down your back sides to the back of your thighs.

He pulled back from your neck, muttering out a small 'jump' so you did. Your legs wrapping around his torso as a reflex.

Changbin carried you around the apartment to what you were guessing was his room.

When you got to his room, you were laid down on the bed. Changbin tugged off his pants before crawling on top of you. His fingers going behind your back to unhook your bra.

Changbin marveled at the sight of your chest, his lips wrapping around your left nipple instantly as his hand went up to the other. You moaned as he sucked harshly, all the arousal rushing down into your core.

"You've been keeping this all to yourself, such beautiful tits.." he muttered, cupping your breasts in his hands as he kissed around your stomach.

Changbin trailed his hands down to your skirt, undoing the zip at the side and pulling them down your legs together with your panties.

"Shit, you're so wet princess. Was this all me?" Changbin asked, his fingers running through your slit.

You nodded your head again, Changbin frowning.

"Speak up, baby."

"Yes Changbin, was all you." you said, embarrassed but at the same time aroused.

"Good girl.." he said, leaning in and licking up your slit.

He groaned at the taste, sucking at your aching bud. His right hand trailed up your thigh, his ring finger prodding at your entrance before he pushed it in.

"Fuck, you're so tight. I can't wait to be inside you.." he said, a moan erupting from the back of your throat as he went back to abusing your clit with his tongue.

He thrusted his single finger in and out of you until he thought you were stretched enough to add a second one, the stretch of his fingers stinging, making you whine.

"How are you even going to take my cock if you can hardly take two of my fingers, huh princess?" he asked, now face to face with you as he kept plunging his fingers into your core.

"Please, don't stop!" you whined, a feeling of ecstasy running through your veins as you came over Changbins fingers.

He slowed down before pulling out, placing a chaste kiss on your lips as you came down from your high.

He tugged down his boxers, throwing them onto the floor as he reached over and pulled a condom out, unwrapping it and rolling it down his hard member.

"You ready?" Changbin asked, a small change if tone compared to before.

"Yeah." you said,looking down, eyes widening at the sight of his large, girthy cock.

"Wait, will that even fit?" you squeaked, suddenly nervous."

Changbin chuckled, going down to place a kiss on your lips.

"If you stay calm, of course." he said, rubbing the tip up and down your slit, making you desperate.

Changbin pulled you into a messy kiss as he lined himself up, pushing in slowly taking it an inch at a time.

You whined at the stretch, more painful that you thought it would be. When he bottomed out Changbin gave you a bit to adjust. You nodded your head, signalling him to start moving and instantly a wave of pleasure coursed through your body.

As you got more comfortable, and everything felt more pleasurable, Changbin got faster. The sight of your writhing body, flushed face and marked up chest bringing him closer to the edge.

"Fuck, you're pussy is basically swallowing my cock princess." Changbin grunted, his pace now harsh. Skin slapping against skin as he pistoned into you.

"Fuck, Changbin, I'm gonna cum." you moaned.

"Me too, princess." he said, slowing his pace but giving harsh thrusts, pushing you over the edge.

Your clenching core sending him into overdrive as he came into the condom and rode out your moments of euphoria.

"That was great." he said, pulling out and chucking the condom into the trash.

He put on his boxers and chucked you his t-shirt.

"Anything you need? A glass if water or something?"

You pulled the shirt over your head, shaking it.

"You wanna.. cuddle?" he asked, more like it was for him than for you.

You opened your arms inviting him as he laid back down next to you. The both of you falling into a deep slumber.

[second-chance-stray]

(Split Ends) RP Log: Cravs, Riylli, and Rising revisit Baldur in Limsa Lominsa.

Cravendy Hound - After entrusting Baldur, the ill-fated boy, to the healers based in Limsa Lominsa, the trio decided to head back to the company...at Crav's insistence, really. Every extra second spent in the maritime city was a second too much. And so, after taking the aetheryte home, we find the three on the company lawn.

Riylli Aliapoh lets out a stretch as they arrive, a bit groggy from the teleporting. "It's a shame you missed it Cravs, Rising ran in while I was castin' one of my spells and I knocked her a clean 20 fulms in the air!" She said, grinning with a bit too much pride. She then seemed to remember Rising was still there. "...By the way, you okay?"

Rising Lotus was patched up after their encounter as well, her right arm was coating in bandages, along with some other patches along the exposed skin of her body. She winced with each step, the healers picking all the needles from her form and now leaving her body to do the rest of the healer. She merely grumbled as Riylli spoke to her, putting her weight on her spear to take some of it off her leg.

Cravendy Hound: "Magic and melee don't mix, Riylli. But, er, 'ow are ye 'oldin' up, Risin'? That injury ye got looked somethin' fierce."

Riylli Aliapoh rubbed the back of her neck awkwardly, taking that as a 'no'. She turned back to Cravs, deciding to ignore the issue like a mature adult. "So... Y'wanna tell us what that was all about? Why're you goin' so far to help this guy's kid?"

Rising Lotus: "...I'll be fine. Kinda a feel like layin' down." she glanced at Riylli, nodding afterwards "Aye. I'm curious 'bout that too."

Cravendy Hound: "I'm still confused 'ow a cactaur of all things made it to La Noscea. Could be a freak accident, but somethin' about it doesn't sit right with me." She sighs in thought, brow knitted and bothered. "....Ah. Uh. I guess I owe ye all an explanation."

Riylli Aliapoh plopped herself down on the step, ready for a story

Cravendy Hound: "Oi, get up! I-I'm not gonna bore ye with all the details," Cravs stammers. "Look. I made a promise to the kid's father. 'is dyin' wish was to see his son grow strong, with his own strength."

Riylli Aliapoh tilted her head. "...Y'know... It aint really his own strength if we had to step in to help... You sure you should be meddlin' like this? I mean, it was just a little cactus thing"

Rising Lotus "...Someone might not want that. I remember the merchant mentionin' somethin' 'bout some folk not carin' for him or his family or somethin'." she shrugs, wincing in pain afterwards "...also cactuar are from Thanalan, don't know how one would of gotten there."

Cravendy Hound nods to Riylli. "I agree, and originally, I just wanted to see if 'e was doin' okay. But this cactaur business...I think someone /else/ is meddlin' with 'im. And if we meddle to remove the meddler, then it'll cancel out, right?"

Riylli Aliapoh 's ears perked up in interest. "Y'mean someone left that cactus out there to take the kid out? Who exactly was this kid's sire? Why's he got so many enemies that would go so far as to try and kill his kid after he's already gone?"

Cravendy Hound shifts in place, heat under the collar. Unusually, she speaks slowly and thoughtfully, as if the wrong word could set off a mine. "Kid's father was a pirate captain, but one with...'onor, I suppose. Steal from the rich, give to the poor. Which lead 'im to rob from the same, powerful set of targets."

Cravendy Hound: "If ye got raided by Captain Thorne, ye didn't -just- lose yer shite. It was a kind of...a mark. A blow to yer pride, and that didn't sit well the rich."

Riylli Aliapoh thinks about this for a moment. "...So if we know who the targets are, why don't we just hop over an' kick their teeth in? Bet that'd gettem to stop messin' with the kid!"

Rising Lotus huffs, closing her eyes tightly for a few moments before glaring at Cravs. "...So what's gonna happen when these powerful targets  learn we're helpin' the kid? Last thing I need is to be marked like the boy, or if they learn we work for Heartwood an' create problems for the others."

Cravendy Hound: "That's step one. Gotta find who's still got it out for the kid, out of a handful of options." She then turns to Rising. "As long as we don't do anythin' illegal we should be alright. And we can threaten to expose 'ow they torment a kid to keep them from doin' anything to us."

Cravendy Hound: "Nothin' illegal, alright? That means even if they're an ass, we can't just kick their teeth in." Cravs lectures to Riylli.

Riylli Aliapoh frowned. "It aint illegal if they're a bad guy! And ain’t kickin' teeth in how pirates settle their differences anyroad?"

Rising Lotus tried to give Cravs a skeptical look, but just ended up grimacing from the shift of posture, then just looked exhausted. "That ain't how it work if you're rich. Can get away with anythin'."

Cravendy Hound: "That's not 'ow the law works! And while that may be 'ow we settle problems on water, on land...under the Admiral's stink eye, we'd probably cause more trouble doin' that."

Cravendy Hound: "The rich still 'ave their pride. I'm thinkin' if word got out that the bugger pesters a goddamn child for 'is late father's legacy, it'd be enough to twist their arm."

Riylli Aliapoh looked to Rising, then to Cravs, and then up to the sky as she let out an exasperated sigh. "...Y'see? This is exactly why we Miqo'te got our own rules..." She grumbled, before finally looking back down. "Fine! We'll do it your way! But if any of 'em tries to swing at me it's fair game, yeah?"

Rising Lotus grumbled, pretty much done with the day. "Well in the case it does go tits up, we can handle ourselves much better than that boy I 'spose."

Cravendy Hound nods. What an exhausting day. "...well. Ye look like ye could use two days worth of sleep, Risin'. That's all I 'ad to say."

Riylli Aliapoh hops to her feet and dusts off her pants. "Alright! Just gimme a shout whenever you get a lead or whatever. Always happy to lend my skills to a good cause!" She flashes Cravs a grin, and very pointedly tries not to look over to the wounded Rising

Rising Lotus "...Aye. You know how to reach us. Though we ought to expect somethin' worse than a cactuar next time." she sighed and started making her way toward the door.

(Cravendy Hound) seems a good place to timeskip to next scene? any last posts and then :P )) (Rising Lotus) I'm good!)) (Riylli Aliapoh) (Timeskip ready! (Cravendy Hound) AAAHH that outfit!!! )) (Cravendy Hound) the blade harness xD )) (Rising Lotus) Oh yeah I don't think you've seen her in it yet!)) (Riylli Aliapoh) (No fair, its so hard to get glams for Riylli ;-; (Cravendy Hound) it looks extremely good )) (Cravendy Hound) *timeskips in same outfit* xD )) (Cravendy Hound) HERE we can at least start in the company so it doesn't feel like, literally seconds after xD )) (Rising Lotus) Guess we'll have to have a fashion montage for Riylli at some point)) (Riylli Aliapoh) (Yknow what, its totally canon that RIylli only has one set of clothes (Cravendy Hound) ahahaha )) (Riylli Aliapoh) (Oh, I DO actually have a glamour change! (Rising Lotus) so pick out something new then we can figure out how she got it!)) (Riylli Aliapoh) (alakazam (Rising Lotus) mask (Cravendy Hound) fjkdslf just the gloves?! )) (Riylli Aliapoh) (Theyre bandages ^o^ Shes been practicing the fire spell! (Rising Lotus) Damn I thought you were just going to throw that mask on xD))

Cravendy Hound - A week later, Cravs has reached out to Riylli and Rising for company (or maybe help?) again. It's related to the business in Limsa Lominsa, and she's wearing her disguise dress again. Oh boy.

Rising Lotus was eyeing the bandages wrapped around Riylli's hands. "...How's that fire spell going?"

Riylli Aliapoh grins to Rising. "It's goin' well! I got the basic formula down, just gotta work on intensity and duration!" She beams proudly, giving Rising a bandaged thumbs up.

Cravendy Hound: "That...looks painful."

Riylli Aliapoh gives a mock bow. "You gotta suffer for art y'know"

Rising Lotus couldn't help but smirk at Riylli's enthusiasm. "...We'll get it down before you touch anythin' we fish up..or the lava." she turned her attention to Cravs, holding back a snicker at seeing her dolled up again. "You find out more 'bout the boy then?"

Cravendy Hound: "Seems ye got some more sufferin' to do then," Cravs notes in a bright tone.

Cravendy Hound: "Right, the Baldur business - I narrowed it down to a couple of names. But that's as far as I can go gatherin' information out 'ere. Thought it'd be more efficient to ask the kid 'imself. Which means." Cravs gestures to her outfit. "I'll need some escorts to talk for me once we're in Limsa again."

Riylli Aliapoh was clearly enjoying the attention, but quieted down to let Cravs speak. "Why not just talk to the kid as Cravs? If he's lost his sire, it... might be nice for him to know he's still got people close to him out there..."

Rising Lotus "Hmm...'spose maybe she doesn't want him to turn her in for the gil? If he really needs to be supportin' him an' his mom anyway." she shrugged. "Doesn't look like the type to sell out someone who's helpin' him though."

Cravendy Hound went as white as a sheet at the suggestion. "A-ah, that's...Uhh, we've got, um. A misunderstandin' between us. If 'e knew it was me, 'e'd flip out for sure. Trust me, it's easier this way." Cravs clears her throat and then hurries out before Riylli or Rising can ask further.

Cravendy Hound - The trip over is pretty awkward. If the subject was brought up again, Cravs would simply pick up the pace and pretend not to hear. And, once the trio were in Limsa, her lips were sealed, clarification frustratingly out of reach. That said, she was definitely walking somewhere with purpose.

Rising Lotus gave up askin' fairly quick, she knew she wouldn't get anywhere at the moment. She'd pry it out of her later though, one way or another. "So... you know what he'll be up to today? Or you jus' hopin' we run into him?"

Riylli Aliapoh wouldn't bring it up again, at the very least smart enough to see Cravs didn't want to talk about it. Instead, she would offer fun facts of things she had learned so far in her research. "...So, did you guys know that a forge runs hotter than lava?"

Cravendy Hound mimes holding something heavy and swinging it around. And to Riylli's fact, she gives the miqo'te a doubting look. Really?

Riylli Aliapoh nods. "Yeah! Turns out lava is only like... half as hot as your average blacksmith forge! It aint even hot enough to melt iron! Makes my job easier, but it's kinda disappointin' y'know?"

(Riylli Aliapoh) (Thank you for subscribing to Lava Facts)

Cravendy Hound desperately wants to ask if that's how Riylli has been testing her fire shield spell - by dunking her hands in a forge. Cravs moves her hands around as if dipping them in something.

Riylli Aliapoh tilts her head, unable to figure out the mimicry. "Can't you like... at least whisper or somethin' when were alone? Surely they don't got ears everywhere?"

Cravendy Hound looks around and finds it acceptably empty. "Did ye dunk yer 'ands in the forge to test yer spell?!" She whisper-yells.

Rising Lotus narrowed her eyes at Cravs "...So he's... carrying somethin'.. then puttin' it in the oven?" she seemed to be combining the conversations. Then Cravs actually spoke. "Oohh you're talkin' 'bout that. I hope you didn't do that, use a fire or somethin' first Riylli."

Riylli Aliapoh blinks at her. "What? You crazy? What if the spell failed?" She said, shaking her head. "Nah, I've been usin' a campfire! Got a problem with the magic runnin' out too fast though..." She muttered, rubbing her poor cooked hands

Cravendy Hound stifles back laughter, and pats Riylli on the back. There there.

Rising Lotus: "I can get ya some cream for that. Know a gobbie that makes some quality stuff. Don't worry it works too, used it after gettin' a nasty burn from some giant bug sparyin' me with gunk."

Riylli Aliapoh grumbles and glares up at Cravs at the treatment, but lets it slide since she couldn't tell if it was meant to be mocking or not. "...That'd be great, thanks. I don't gotta pay for it, right?"

Cravendy Hound: "Bug....gunk? Bug gunk...That sounds. Hm." Cravs raises a brow at Rising but doesn't say more.

Rising Lotus "Well I ought to considerin' how you made me a pin cushion on our last outin' together." she snickered a bit, the first time she cracked a joke about it. "But nah, he owes me one anyhow. Next time I'm up there I'll grab ya some." she gave Riylli a firm pat on the back.

Riylli Aliapoh grumbled again, but couldn't really argue back. "...Thanks." She muttered, not exactly enthused about all this back-patting she was receiving

Cravendy Hound had earlier given Rising a notepad with names written in it. One of them, hopefully, belonged to the person who was harassing the kid. Her heels clicking on the docks, Cravs would eventually lead the little crew to a dusty corner of Limsa where the kid (B) was presently practicing his form with the ax.

Cravendy Hound - The heavy ax is far too big for the kid. Every swing pulls him comically forward with the weapon. He stops his 'practice' and looks up at the approaching trio with a wide smile. "I remember you two! You helped me with that monster the other day."

(Cravendy Hound) more back pats )) (Cravendy Hound) i demand more )) (Rising Lotus) I feel like Riylli and Rising would have back pats that would eventually devolve into a hitting contest)) (Cravendy Hound) actually cravs and rising would have to squat down to pat Riylli's back ahah - otherwise it'd be a head pat )) (Riylli Aliapoh) (Cravs and Rising know it's too dangerous to headpat Riylli, they'd probably get bit (Cravendy Hound) sometimes my tall friends would use my head as an arm rest.....annoyed me, and yet I can see Cravs doing that to Riylli lmao )) (Rising Lotus) I've done that to my shorter friends before xD))

Riylli Aliapoh perked up as she got recognized by the kid, offering him a friendly wave. "Hey! How are you holdin' up after all them needles?"

Rising Lotus watches the boy fling himself with his strikes, smirking with every swing.  "Aye that was us." she eyed up his weapon for a few moments. "You ought to get somethin' a bit lighter by the way, gonna leave yourself open if you take too long liftin' your weapon."

Cravendy Hound - The kid bashfully itches the tip of his nose. "I'm doing fine, thanks to you all...Woke up on the softest bed I've ever been on in my life, healing expenses all covered." Baldur's eyes drift over to Cravs, and then back to Riylli and Rising. "Oh, I plan to! I'm just using this old thing because it was the only thing I could afford. Once I earn enough, I'll buy a better one...after everything else, haha."

Cravendy Hound turns away, avoiding eye contact. It's overkill given that she's wearing a mask.

Rising Lotus eyed Cravendy, she had to pay for the needle removal out of her pocket. "...well I'm sure them healers were excited for the chance to de-needle someone. Don't see many cactuar over here after all, bit strange." she nodded as he brought up upgrading his armor and weapon. "A good set of armor is jus' as important as a good weapon, smart thinkin'."

Riylli Aliapoh nudged Rising with her foot to try and bring her back to the task at hand, snatching the list out of her hands. "Hey, so... Were kinda lookin' into something, think you might be able to help us out? You know any of the names on this list?"

Cravendy Hound - Baldur nods enthusiastically, dreads bouncing on top of his head. Admiration for Rising and Riylli is practically gushing from every inch of the kid. "So that was a cactaur? I've never seen one before."

Cravendy Hound - Baldur snaps into attention. "Oh, right away! I'd be thrilled to help you two out. Let's see..." He takes the list and scans it. "Only this last one. Mindred Rot. She's who I go to if I need a loan."

Rising Lotus "Aye, I grew up 'round them, used to hit them with sticks then ru-" she glanced at Riylli as she bumped her and had the list snatched away.

(Cravendy Hound) dfsd hit them with sticks and run???? chaos child )) (Rising Lotus) She didn (Rising Lotus) didn't have toys or anything xD Played with bugs and lizards and cactuars))

Riylli Aliapoh raised her eyebrow at the name. "...'Mindred Rot'? Well that's a bad guy name if I've ever heard one." She said, nodding along until she remembered Cravs' full name. "Er... Right, anyroad, what's she like? If she lends you money she can't be that bad, right?"

(Riylli Aliapoh) (Poor riylli about to learn the horrors of capitalism)

Cravendy Hound - Baldur smiles as he hands the list back to Riylli. "Oh, yeah, her name's pretty rotten. But in some ways...she looks after me. No one else'll give my family loans."

Rising Lotus "You need to get out of the woods more..." she shook her head at Riylli's comment. She hummed at Baldur's words about the woman. "Hmm, how generous of her."

Riylli Aliapoh wrinkled her nose. "Honestly I'd rather get out of the woods less... How in the world do you lot handle that salt in the air?"

Cravendy Hound - Baldur's gaze wanders to Rising's axe, and then to Riylli's staff. "So, you two must be adventurers, huh? You think you could teach me a thing or two? Punch better, smarter, harder? Oh, and! I didn't mean to be rude." He turns to Cravs. "Who's your friend?"

Rising Lotus Grinned, giving him a nod. "Aye! Do a lot of guard an' merc work. Takin' me all over, mostly back an' forth between Idyllshire an' places though. This one is still gettin' her footin' for it though." she snickered a bit as she eyed Riylli. "Oh, an' that's Singin' Gull. She's uh...a great singer an' has to save her voice most the time. We're guardin' her on her...singing journey?"

Riylli Aliapoh puffed her chest out. "Yup! Name's Riylli, Warrior of Earth!" she declared proudly, possibly forgetting Cravs and Rising were in earshot. "I'm a master of earth magic, but I'm sure I could give you some tips! Oh, and this is..." She trails off, staring at Cravs as her mind blanks on what her alias was. Thankfully Rising was there to have her back, though the Roegadyn still earned herself a glare from her little comment

Cravendy Hound 's frown twitches slightly. Singing Gull the Singer. Really? But she goes along with it anyway.

Cravendy Hound - Baldur's mouth forms an 'o' in awe. "Idyllshire? Never even heard of the place. Sounds cool though...And magic? How would I even start?" He turns back for a second to rest his rusty axe against a crate, and then hops right back into the conversation. "Like, just think really hard and magic happens? Hrrrghhhh.."

Riylli Aliapoh shook her head at the kid. "Nah, it aint that simple. It's more like... Y'know how you can move your fingers with your mind? You basically do that, but you move your aether about instead, and get THAT aether to move the aether OUTSIDE of you, and... Honestly I might not remember all the lessons, it's kinda just a reflex at this point. But you shouldn't be wastin' your talents on magic anyroad! You're a highlander right? You're gonna have plenty of muscle when you grow up, you should use-

Riylli Aliapoh -that instead!"

Rising Lotus could talk for hours about Idyllshire, but she resisted and tried to steer the conversation back on topic, which of course meant giving Riylli a light smack to the arm to get her to focus up. "Anyway, you know were we could find this Rot lady? Gull here is lookin' for gil for her next performance an' were hopin' to find some donations."

Cravendy Hound - Baldur is trying so hard to follow Riylli's explanation, but it leaves the poor kid's brain all tangled. "Huh, what? Huh? Uhh, oh, you want to meet Miss Rot? She's usually really busy so I have to schedule in advance. But I can ask if she's free to meet you all next time."

Riylli Aliapoh sighs. "Y'mean we gotta come all the way out here again..? Fine, I guess... Not like we can just go kick the doors down and demand to talk to her after all..." She muttered, offering a small glare to Cravs out of the corner of her eye

Rising Lotus cleared her throat, glaring at Riylli as she glared at Cravs "We'd appreciate that, jus' say that..uh..an up an' comin' singer is lookin' for fundin'. " she gave Baldur a nod, hoping that selling Cravs like that would make her the perfect target for a loan shark.

Cravendy Hound looks similarly annoyed, but shakes her head no to Riylli. It's not like they could go in there with wild accusations anyway - seemed worth strategizing over first.

Cravendy Hound - With the night fast approaching, Cravs motions with her hand to signal her intention to head home. Without bothering to wave goodbye to Baldur, she walks on ahead.

Rising Lotus watches Crav hurry away. "Uh sorry..." she put her hand to her mouth to muffle her words "Sort of a diva that one. Good luck out there lad!" she gave him a thumbs up before hurrying after 'Singing Gull'.

Riylli Aliapoh sighed once for not being allowed to rampage mindlessly, then once more as Cravs walked away without saying bye to the kid. She offers Baldur a wave. "You keep practicin' okay? We'll come by and see you again later, and maybe I'll share some of my adventurin' secrets with you!"

Cravendy Hound is a good distance ahead. As she passes by a stranger, there's some kind of odd collision that ends up tripping Cravs. Her mask drops off and rolls a few ilms forward as the stranger awkwardly, but quickly, makes their escape without even a sorry.

Cravendy Hound scrambles to recover the headware and fasten it back on. By the time Riylli and Rising have caught up, she's still kneeled over on the floor, troubled.

Riylli Aliapoh pretty much has to run to keep up with Cravs' long-legged walking, blinking in confusion as she notices her state. "H-Hey, you alright?"

Rising Lotus hurries to catch up to Cravs, quickly stepping in front of her to shield her face as she glanced around. "Aye..did you know that man or somethin'?"

Cravendy Hound: "I'm fine. Rattled is all." She whispers as she wobbles back up and takes a deep breath. ".....no, I didn't recognize them."

Rising Lotus looked around at the few bystanders eyeing the scene. "Maybe it'd be best to get out of here...before there's a chance to cause more of a scene." she said the last part in a whisper. Last thing they needed was the yellow jackets upon them.

Riylli Aliapoh raises her arm up seemingly to try to comfort her, only to hesitate and lower it back down. "...Let's talk outside of the city, all this salt is starting to make me sick..." She says, awkwardly attempting to give Cravs an out

Cravendy Hound: "...Right. No point in worrying about it now. Let's just get out of 'ere." She mutters.

[cosmic-goddess-leo]

First Love / Late Spring Finale

Kuroo Tetsuro x Reader

Series Summary: Reader was once a nationally recognized volleyball player until an injury she suffered her last year of high school. She and Kuroo knew each other vaguely through a mutual friend but lost contact after her injury. Now they attend the same University in Tokyo and are beginning to reconnect.

Chapter Summary: Kuroo deals with the fallout of Bokuto and (Y/n)’s talk. Spring finally arrives.

Word Count: 4300

Author’s Note: Well, we’re finally at the end! I try not to make chapter fics too long, so this is ending at 6 chapters. I hope you all have enjoyed this series as much as I enjoyed writing it. Thank you for reading!

The next day was very quiet. Kuroo had gone about his regular Sunday routine, all while waiting for a text from (Y/n) telling him if she and Bokuto had talked and how it went.

He had heard no yelling through the walls, so that was a good sign. He didn’t want them to fight, of course. Bokuto was his friend, and (Y/n) was obviously very special to him.

He continued waiting until the sun went down. He was sitting out on his balcony for the assignment he had mentioned to (Y/n) the night before.

The chilly autumn air sent him inside to retrieve a blanket. His phone outside finally gave the tone he had been waiting so long for. He almost crashed into the balcony railing when he went to retrieve it.

Can I come over?

Yes. Always.

Kuroo was at his front door before (Y/n) even knocked. He opened it to see (Y/n) standing there, eyes puffy and cheeks wet.

The two stood there silently, looking at one another. Neither knowing what to say.

Kuroo wordlessly opened his arms. (Y/n) wrapped her arms around his waist without hesitation and buried her face in his chest. He carefully pulled her into the apartment before closing the door behind them.

(Y/n) squirmed slightly, prompting Kuroo to loosen his grip. She wiped her eyes and sighed deeply, looking up at him.

“I take it you and Bokuto talked...?” He asked, watching her nod in response.

“Yeah... what was the assignment?”

Kuroo smiled slightly before ushering her to the balcony. “I just have to get a picture of the lunar eclipse for extra credit... so you can’t change the subject.”

A small smile tugged at (Y/n)’s lips as she sat in one of the lawn chairs Kuroo had set out. He draped the blanket over their laps and gave her a look prompting her to speak.

“I told him how I feel.” she said simply.

Kuroo raised an eyebrow at her. “And how do you feel?”

(Y/n) stared up at him, hoping he would budge and not make her talk about it. Eventually she gave a sigh and turned away from him to look at the sky.

“I told him that he’s a great friend... he loves hard... but it’s only when I’m hurting that he shows it.” (Y/n) explained, “It was kinda different back at Fukurodani... he was always close with me, so sweet... Then after I broke my ankle it all changed. Once I healed he just dropped off the face of the earth until graduation... when he heard my mom didn’t bother coming... Then every time I was miserable he was there, but never any other time... It kinda made me want to always be miserable, yknow?” she asked, quickly glancing at Kuroo.

“My mom has always been the same way... Two people who I thought loved me only do it when I’m suffering. That’s no way to live... sabotaging yourself so you can feel love.” (Y/n) began to tremble and her voice wavered.

Kuroo gently wrapped an arm around her, pulling her close as she fought her tears.

“I’m just so tired... I want to feel loved always, not just when I’m in pain.” She sniffled, wiping at her eyes with the sleeve of her jacket.

Kuroo nodded, “And that’s reasonable... you shouldn’t have to ask for affection from the people who claim to care for you. They should just give it to you...no strings attached.”

(Y/n) sighed softly and slightly leaned away from him, causing him to loosen his arm around her. “Yeah... and that’s what I told him...”

“How’d he take it?” He asked, watching her adjust herself in the chair.

“He was upset... he didn’t know he was doing it, so I can’t really blame him... but I told him I don’t want to see him for a while...” She said.

Kuroo could sense there was more she wanted to say, and she wasn’t saying what was on her mind. “(Y/n)?”

She fought the urge to bite her lip, instead she fiddled with the blanket. “I don’t think I should see you for a while either... at least, not the way you want to see me...”

Kuroo felt his stomach twist. “Oh...”

“I like you a lot, I really do,” (Y/n) hurriedly added, “I just... I think I loved Bokuto... I can’t just dive into something with you. Otherwise you’re just a rebound... I don’t want that...”

Kuroo frowned and looked down at his lap. “I understand... I won’t push you... as long as we can continue being friends...”

“Yeah... Of course...” She said, mimicking him and staring down at herself.

They both went quiet, neither one knowing what else there was to say. Kuroo opted to watch the sky for the eclipse, knowing if he looked at her he would probably do something stupid.

“Why am I here?” (Y/n) suddenly asked, looking up at Kuroo.

“Like...” He paused, “on this earth...?”

(Y/n) couldn’t help but chuckle, “No... on your balcony... Why do you want me here...”

Kuroo finally looked back at her, feeling like his heart was ready to lurch out of his chest. How was he supposed to reveal all these feelings without ruining their agreement?

“I want to know you... I think we all deserve to feel known by someone...” He said, staring deep into her eyes.

(Y/n) sniffled softly before forcing her eyes off him and to the eclipse. “It’s started... Want me to get the picture?”

Kuroo bit his lip, ignoring the prick of pain and grabbing his phone. “I was just going to get it myself...”

“Shouldn’t you be in it? So your professor knows you didn’t just get it off the internet?” She asked.

Kuroo smiled slightly before handing her the phone and posing with his back to the moon. He had a sad smile in the picture, he was hoping he wouldn’t have to look at it aside from showing it to his professor.

--------------------------------------

(Y/n) and Kuroo continued on as if their kiss had never happened. They passed notes in their classes, studied together, saw movies and ate meals together.

It was hard for Kuroo not to flirt every now and then, especially with how playful the two always were. But he minded his boundaries, knowing if he didn’t she would be hurt.

Before they knew it, the end of the semester had hit and it was time to leave for winter break. Kuroo’s family lived in the city, he would only have to take a cab to go home and visit.

(Y/n), however, would have to take a train home and would be gone the entire break.

Kuroo hoped that would be an adequate amount of time for her to sort things out. He had offered to take her out on a small ‘friend date,’ as she called it. Then he would take her to the train station the next morning to bid her farewell.

He opted to take her to the ramen shop by their apartments. He knew if he took her somewhere too nice it would come off as a date-date. Plus, the shop had enough special memories to compensate for the lack of mood-lighting or general romantic ambiance.

They agreed to go after their class’ Christmas party they convinced their professor to host. Their classroom was decorated with all sorts of Christmas decorations, one of the abandoned side-tables had been covered with all sorts of treats, and presents had been set in one of the corners of the room.

Kuroo wasn’t too comfortable leaving the gift he had gotten for (Y/n) there, especially since this was the class they had with Kaito. He figured it would be best to give it to her himself during the gift exchange.

They spent the majority of the party together, much to Kuroo’s relief given that Kaito was very much present. He hadn’t caused anymore trouble for Kuroo or (Y/n), but that didn’t mean Kuroo didn’t still have his guard up.

Kuroo’s shoulders had tensed, the feeling of daggers being glared at him sending a chill up his spine. The sensation was cut short once (Y/n) placed a gentle hand on Kuroo’s shoulder, bringing his attention to her.

“Hey, something got you distracted?” She asked, a look of concern on her face.

Kuroo relaxed at her touch, giving her a small, reassuring smile. “Just feels kind of awkward...”

(Y/n) smiled slightly, removing her hand from his shoulder and tapping her fingers against the paper cup of hot cocoa she had been given. “It’s only awkward if you make it awkward, Tetsu.”

Kuroo sighed softly, taking a sugar cookie from the table nearby and biting into it. “Well, most of the class knows I beat the shit out of Kaito. Sooo it’s kind of everyone’s fault it’s awkward, no?”

(Y/n) rolled her eyes playfully and lightly nudged him with her elbow. “It’s hard to forget when you keep reminding them.”

Kuroo chuckled and shrugged his shoulders. “Not my fault I’m such a badass.”

(Y/n) raised an eyebrow at him, smirking slightly as she reached forward and wiped a few crumbs from the corner of his lip with her thumb. “Oh yeah, such a badass.”

Kuroo blushed and chuckled slightly, finishing off the cookie and wiping his hand on his pants.

“Why don’t we get out of here...?” (Y/n) asked, stepping closer to Kuroo and lowering her voice. “This is fun and all but I’m getting really hungry...”

Kuroo smiled slightly, assuring her he’d come up with a good excuse to leave the party before the gift exchange. He told their professor he had planned an ‘extra special dinner’ for the two of them, and that he saw no gifts for them in the pile anyway. The professor sent them off with two small goodie bags and wished them a Merry Christmas.

Kuroo couldn’t help the rush of adrenaline he felt when he saw (Y/n) wearing the jacket he had lent her a couple months prior. The black material complimented the red sweater-dress and her black boots perfectly. It took him a minute to realize he had been staring at her, and it took him even longer to stop himself.

He finally looked away when (Y/n) held her hand out to him. The coy look she gave him told him she noticed his staring. He took her hand, hoping she would interpret the redness in his cheeks as a side effect from the cold rather than her touch.

At one point during the walk (Y/n) leaned in closer to him, whining about her choice of clothing that night. Kuroo sighed dramatically as he pulled her to a stop in the middle of the sidewalk.

He took off his scarf and wrapped it around her, smiling at her despite her protests. “You already took my jacket, it’s my official mission to keep you from becoming a (Y/n)-cicle.”

(Y/n) eventually caved, keeping on his scarf the rest of the walk to the ramen shop.

Once they arrived, they picked their usual secluded table. Kuroo ordered their food, already having memorized (Y/n)’s usual order. He joined her at their table, stopping in place when he noticed a wrapped gift in his seat.

“And what’s this?” He smirked, picking up the present and setting it on the table so he could sit.

“Just a little something I had in my bag...” (Y/n) smiled, looking between him and the box.

Kuroo hummed softly, zipping open his bag and pulling out (Y/n)’s gift. “What a coincidence! I just so happened to have this in my bag!” He set the box on the table, sliding it towards (Y/n).

“You open yours fiiiirst! I wanna see your reaction!” She said, bouncing in her chair excitedly.

Kuroo chuckled before taking the present and ripping the paper away. He opened the box, revealing a small, colorful voucher nestled in red tissue paper. He picked up the card, reading through it carefully before his jaw dropped.

“I didn’t think they even had one of these...” He mumbled.

(Y/n) smiled proudly, “They do now! A couple of cooking podcasters I follow had a discount code. You are now one of the first subscribers of the Mackin-on-Mackerel club! Now you get a box every month with ingredients for a new mackerel recipe!”

Kuroo swore he could feel a tear in his eye. It was too early to say he loved her. But damn. He felt it.

“Do you need a minute, Tetsu? Cuz I’d like to open my gift now.” (Y/n) teased, taking the small box and looking over the gold wrapping paper.

Kuroo wiped at his fake tears, earning a giggle from (Y/n). He composed himself and motioned towards her gift. “Have at it!”

(Y/n) smiled excitedly and tore at the paper. Kuroo noticed the look in her eyes shift when she read the logo on the small, black jewelry box. She slowly opened it, her eyes softening when she saw the small gold necklace inside.

The delicate gold chain sparkled under the Christmas lights adorning the walls of the shop. A small pendant of a jade crescent moon with gold accents was the centerpiece of the gift. Kuroo would never tell her how much it cost or that it was custom-made by a family friend.

Kuroo shifted slightly in his chair, trying and failing to hide his nervousness. “Do you like it...?”

(Y/n) carefully held the pendant in her hands, studying its beauty before a smile erupted on her face. She bit her lip and nodded quickly. “I love it... It’s perfect...”

Kuroo breathed a sigh of relief. His mind trailed off to the second gift in his bag, conflicted on whether or not he should give it to her.

“Will you help me put it on?”

Oh fuck. OH FUCK.

Kuroo quickly nodded and got out of his chair, moving behind (Y/n) and carefully taking the chain as she lifted her hair for him. The sight of her bare neck had him internally hollering for help. He clasped the chain and moved back to his seat, smiling softly as she admired it.

“It suits you...” He sighed, the moment cut short as their order number was called.

Kuroo could sense the aura shift between the two after he gave her that gift. Yes, they still talked and joked as usual, but there was a look in (Y/n)’s eyes that had him enveloped in a sweet fog every time he met her gaze.

The walk to their apartment was silent. (Y/n) had taken his hand the second they walked out into the cold, and she leaned into him slightly as they walked. As if the tension couldn’t get thicker, it began to snow.

This was all one big cliche but dammit, Kuroo liked cliches. He liked being cheesy and romantic. But if (Y/n) wasn’t ready, he wouldn’t push her.

They made it to their apartments without any romantic incidents. Kuroo could tell there was something (Y/n) wanted to say. Instead she wished him goodnight before going into her apartment.

--------------------------------------

“You’re sure you have everything? Keys? Wallet? Phone? Taser? Drugs?”

“Kuroo! Shh!” (Y/n) hissed, lightly smacking Kuroo’s arm as he snickered. “You’re gonna get me kicked out of the station.”

Kuroo snickered, “Relax, no one heard me. Everyone’s too busy getting to their trains.” He motioned towards all the people hurriedly passing by the bench they sat on.

(Y/n) sighed quietly before snuggling into him. Kuroo smiled softly, noticing the necklace he had given her placed over the black turtleneck she wore. At least she wasn’t hiding it.

“How are you feeling about seeing your dad?” he asked.

(Y/n) gave him a small smile before glancing down at her phone. “He called me twice this morning to make sure I had everything and was ready to come home... I’m really excited to see him. I think this is what I need.”

Kuroo smiled, “I’m sure you’re going to have a lot of fun with him...” Sure, Kuroo was sad (Y/n) would be leaving, but he knew how much she was looking forward to being home for the break.

Before he could say anything else, the train they had been waiting for finally pulled into the station and began boarding.

Kuroo helped carry (Y/n)’s bags to the train, stopping just short of the door and leaving enough room for the other passengers to board. (Y/n) gave him a questioning glance.

“Before you go, I wanted to give you one last gift.” Kuroo said, fishing around in his jacket pocket.

“Is it my hashbrowns that you stole this morning?” (Y/n) asked, raising an eyebrow at him.

Kuroo pulled an envelope out of his coat, holding it out to her silently. She slowly took it from him, looking over the plain red paper before looking back at him.

“I didn’t want to give it to you last night...” He admitted, staring down at the envelope. “Just... don’t read it until Christmas, okay?”

(Y/n) bit her lip before slowly nodding and putting the envelope in her jacket pocket. “Okay... I can get my bags from here, thank you so much for dropping me off.”

“No problem,” He smiled. “And just let me know when you’re coming back. I’ll pick you up.”

(Y/n) smiled and pulled him into a tight hug. He quickly returned the embrace, inhaling her scent one last time. “Merry Christmas, Tetsu...”

“Merry Christmas, (Y/n)...”

The two slowly parted. Kuroo thought he saw a tear slip down her cheek, but she quickly picked up her bags and got on the train.

Kuroo backed farther onto the platform, watching as the doors shut and the passengers all took their seats. He could see (Y/n) from her seat, her eyes never leaving him as the train slowly departed. She quickly raised her hand, giving him a small wave that he returned. Then the train took off, and (Y/n) was gone.

--------------------------------------

Kuroo would be lying if he said he wasn’t nervous when Christmas rolled around. He was thankfully distracted by his family, so the fact that (Y/n) hadn’t texted or called about the letter didn’t have him completely dying on the inside.

He wasn’t sure if he regretted giving her the letter or not. Surely she would have told him if she was upset, right?

One day went by. Then another. And another. Suddenly, there was only a week before classes resumed and Kuroo still hadn’t heard from (Y/n).

She had told him the day before Christmas when to pick her up from the train station, but that was all.

He was at the station about 30 minutes before she was due to arrive. He thought if he was alone in the cold for long enough, he would be able to calm himself down.

Once the train pulled into the station, he realized he was wrong. He felt like he was about to have a heart attack just at the sight of the train. He stood up, holding up the small sign he had made for (Y/n) in hopes she would see it amongst the crowd of people waiting for their loved ones.

He felt like his heart stopped when he saw her. She was wearing his jacket, her hair had been cut and styled differently, her pendent stood out over the sweater she was sporting. She was still wearing the necklace, that was a good sign.

She looked around the crowd, stopping when she finally caught sight of Kuroo. Her expression was unreadable at first. Kuroo gulped down his anxiety and forced a very nervous smile.

(Y/n)’s expression completely changed.

She smiled brightly and ran towards him, her boots clicking loudly against the floor as she approached. Kuroo’s heart began pounding in his chest, his smile turned genuine.

(Y/n) dropped her bags to the floor and practically leapt towards him, hugging his neck as he held her waist and spun her.

Kuroo wasn’t sure when he felt (Y/n) press her lips to his, he just suddenly felt her warmth enveloping him as she tightened her arms around him. He eagerly returned the kiss, lowering her onto her tip-toes before pulling back.

He rested his forehead against hers, breathing hard as (Y/n) smiled and pressed a small kiss to the corner of his lips.

“I take it you read my letter...?” He murmured, smiling wider as she giggled and leaned into him.

“Yes... Yes I did...” She sighed, brushing a strand of his hair out of his face.

“And...?”

(Y/n) smiled and pulled him into another kiss, but not before mumbling a line from the letter he had written. It was the one that stuck with her most, the one she read before bed every night after she first opened it Christmas morning.

胸がはち切れそうで. It’s something I heard a long time ago, whispered between two lovers dancing in the moonlight. When I look at you, you are all I see, and love fills my heart. All I hear is 胸がはち切れそうで - My chest is about to burst.

“胸がはち切れそうで...”

--------------------------------------

“I’m too rusty, I’ll be awful!” (Y/n) whined, reluctantly following Kuroo through their campus.

“(Y/n), I talked to the other players, they won’t mind!” Kuroo assured her, adjusting his gym-bag over his shoulder. “Besides, they think you’re something of a celebrity. They want autographs.”

(Y/n) gave him a look of horror before covering her face and groaning. “Nooooo! I’m going back home!”

Kuroo stopped at the doors of the gym, turning to look at (Y/n) who had opted to stare up at a blooming cherry tree rather than the intimidating building to her left.

He sighed softly, gently taking her hand and pulling her to face him. “You know I’d never force you into anything you wouldn’t want... but you said you wanted to practice, this is the only way.”

(Y/n) pouted, hoping Kuroo would change his mind, but he didn’t seem to be budging.

She sighed before leaning up and pecking his lips. “You’re lucky you’re cute... let’s do this.”

Kuroo smirked and opened the doors for (Y/n). He led her onto the court where the volleyball club usually practiced. The group wasn’t too large, some people weren’t back on campus yet and were still enjoying their spring.

It was just enough people to make (Y/n) nervous, though.

Numerous people greeted Kuroo, then quickly flocked to him to say hello to the girl they’d heard so much about.

To (Y/n)’s surprise, some of them really did ask for autographs and pictures. Thankfully, no one talked about the accident that blocked her from finals, rather they talked about her amazing career before that. She could feel herself becoming slightly overwhelmed until Kuroo pulled her to the side to stretch in peace.

A familiar face entered (Y/n)’s field of vision, causing her to stop mid-step. Kuroo straightened up, knowing he would be there, but not knowing how (Y/n) would handle the interaction.

Bokuto stopped a couple feet in front of (Y/n), looking between her and Kuroo. “Hey...”

“Hey...” (Y/n) mumbled, shifting slightly under Bokuto’s gaze.

“So... you’re going to be joining us?” He asked, noting her old volleyball shoes she was currently wearing.

(Y/n) nodded, “Yeah... if you think you can handle it, of course.”

Anyone who didn’t know (Y/n) would have thought she was challenging Bokuto, trying to be rude and intimidate him.

But Bokuto slowly smiled. He knew that tone. He crossed his arms over his chest, raising an eyebrow at her. “Oh yeah? Well you’ve been out of the game a while, I’ve learned some new tricks.”

“I’ve seen how you play, I think I’ll be fine.” (Y/n) smirked, placing her hands on her hips.

Kuroo laughed before getting between the two and lightly nudging them. “Hey now, don’t get so eager. I’m putting us on the same team first game. You’ll have plenty of time to one-up each other then.”

“Ughh, how lame. I guess I can still show you up even if we’re on the same team.” Bokuto groaned.

“You’re on.” (Y/n) smiled.

Kuroo and Bokuto were both in awe at how (Y/n) was playing. It was as if she never left the court. The chemistry between the trio was electric, Kuroo knew signing them on the same team was the right move. With his blocking AND Bokuto and (Y/n)’s spikes, their team was unstoppable.

Their setter tossed the ball to Bokuto, and he spiked it perfectly only for their libero to receive it at the last second. The ball flew high, so high Kuroo thought it would go unreceived.

Suddenly, (Y/n) emerged seemingly from out of nowhere, jumped as high as she could, and spiked the ball back over the net, getting the winning point for their team.

“HEY HEY HEY! THERE SHE IS!!!” Bokuto cheered, hugging (Y/n) tightly and lifting her off the ground. The rest of the team whooped for her and high-fived her, bringing a bright smile to her face, one Kuroo hadn’t seen since he saw her play all those years ago.

She was shining like the sun, so many people around her complimenting her play style and her skill. (Y/n) looked past all of them and towards Kuroo, who was smiling at her proudly, his adoration for her clear in his eyes.

胸がはち切れそうで...

[og-danny-dorito]

《 Call Out My Name 》

〔 A/N :

     Hey, I know no one likes reading this part so I'll try to make it brief. This was done as a gift for @youthbitch whom is very entertaining and sweet and honestly just flat out adorable with the coolest and most creative ideas I've heard in a really long time. I hope y'all like this, even though it's not that great of a project considering some of my other stuff. Basically Jason tells the reader to vent and they do, leading to an awkward pat and a promise that he'll be there for them. Tell me if y'all want gendered five or not and I'll release ones for any genders separately or change the pronouns in some to be custom to male, female and/or gender neutral. Anyway, thanks for reading, and I hope you like the story thing.

⁃ Danny ✌🏼🗿 〕

<<------------------------------------------------------------------------------------->>

  Cigarette smoke pooled on the hotel ceiling. The scent of it hanging in the air, the visual as it whisked in curls on itself as it moved freely, even the feeling of it curving around your skin made you feel the familiar sensation of a flipping stomach. You could remember the exact moment where this had all began; where the phone calls on the middle of the night and the surprise break-ins through your window took place has remained no lost memory even though it happened quite a few months ago. There was always someone nearby, always someone watching. It had been like that from the beginning.

  He was quiet as he breathed, his eyes closed as he inhaled the smoke from the cigarette between his left index and middle finger. It was a crime how pretty he looked while breathing in that cancer stick. A self destructive item for an equally self destructive person, you supposed, but it didn't stop you from feeling the same amount guilt for not being able to talk him out of it. You weren't perfect; you never had been. And you didn't intend to make it so either. So why did he look at you like that? Why when he touched you, you felt like the most implant person on the planet? Why, even though he rarely spoke, did his words feel like they were made for you? A chunk of you felt shame for it.

  Shame for the selfishness of wanting to keep him there, with you, away from what he so often found solace in even though it was a continuation of the past events that left him so scarred and beaten. You weren't a perfect empath, but if you were in his position, every day would feel like the beginning of the end. Waiting for it to all come back looping. For the cycle of attachment, pain and grief to repeat itself only to halt when he could no longer bear to witness its gruesome pillage of the people around him and himself. No matter how strong he was, he felt the pain. And you saw it. When you were alone. When you were quiet and settled. With his hands gripped tightly to you and his head rested in the nook of your shoulder. Armor did only so much with a fragile warrior underneath.

  "I can almost hear your thoughts from over here." His voice was low, kept quiet due to the desire to keep this serene state of the room. The TV ran, but the words weren't heard. Background noise; always a good deterrent from doing any hard and focused thinking. He seemed to take another drag from his cigarette, and, turning his head over to roll in your direction, he shifted in place to adjust his sore muscles a little. Jason hadn't bothered to undress into pajamas much less take of his shoes before getting into the bed, settling with just putting on the TV, lighting a cig and letting his thoughts run with a warm body next to him. Of course, he hadn't ever implied using you as just a warm body, but you had thought it over and decided you didn't mind much if he used you like that for a night or two.

  You were quiet before glancing over, leaning your head back against the board of the cheap bed frame. Silence. You couldn't find anything to say that might contribute, but he managed to stay patient. You noticed he was getting better at that lately; he must've been going to therapy more often lately. "Something up?", he said, concern lacing his tone. You raised a brow, moving your head over just enough to roll to meet his eyes. Vibrant green, like radioactive waste., almost like they were glowing. A light at the end of a river. Or a beacon of a lost past long since having been chased after in hopes of its repeat. The question jarred a small grin out of you. "Not much you'd be interested in. Why, you wanna switch listening positions for tonight?", you asked, sounding coy. He snorted a little, rolling his eyes before taking another drag from the cigarette. It was interesting to see how his lips closed around it. They were chapped but full. Almost made you wonder what they'd feel like under the pad of your thumb, but you were smarter than tricking yourself into thinking it would happen.

  Jason exhaled the smoke after keeping it in his lungs for a while. It shot from his lips quickly, soon rising to the ceiling before eventually dissipating after a few moments of lingering around it. It was so dim in here you could imagine that the ceiling wasn't grimy and stained from previous chainsmokers. But you doubted anyone else had revealed the deepest parts of themselves like you had both done before here. His amused grin turned to a small frown as time passed, and you watched as his brows furrowed. "I'm..." he paused. "I'm just concerned, is all. You just seem a little dissociated. Haven't contacted anyone lately or really talked to anyone in a few days, even me. I might be reading this whole thing wrong, but if something's up, you can...” He took a second to shift a bit in his seat. “...I want you to let me know."

  The last sew words seemed to permeate for a good few reasons, but he spoke with such determination in his voice you swore he'd hunt down and strangle your problems to death if it weren't for the fact that they weren't tangible. You ran a hand through your hair, and almost immediately he managed to grab a small strand and twirl it between two fingers. He had always been fascinated with your hair, although you never found much special about it. He seemed to care more about smaller details than the bigger picture. For a good few seconds, you remained quiet, eyebrows furrowing to try to figure out what the hell to say without making yourself seem pissed off.

  He extended the cigarette to you, and you shook your head before straightening up a bit. The bed creaked under the pressure. "I uh..." You squinted at the TV ahead. Seemed like some infomercial was on, but it didn't catch your interest. Even though you wanted to, you didn't change the subject entirely to the infomercial since he'd pinpoint that as avoiding the question and would then be even more worried for you. You attempted to sort your thoughts, but you supposed venting wasn't about organization. "I'm not sure, to be honest. I like...I'm just getting tired of all the shit around me, yknow? I just want things to change."

  He nodded, making sure to slowly make his way up to rub at your scalp. It felt oddly nice, maybe even a little soothing, to have someone vaguely pulling upon your hair. He was quiet, taking drags from his cigarette whilst also paying close attention to you. But thankfully not to the point of feeling like you were being scrutinized. "But..my goal takes time. And I'm a patient person, but I can't...I don't want to wait if it's all I do. I wonder a lot if it'd be different if I was somewhere else in a different environment, but I don't want to just...leave everyone. I've got a good system set up.", you said, furrowing your brows. Jason was quiet as he listened but made sure to nod while you spoke. He sighed a little, leaning back. You were feeling yourself sink into the mattress. You had to get somewhere tomorrow, but it wouldn't kill you to fall asleep here. You'd probably sleep easier if you were next to him, anyway.

  He seemed to tense a bit at the last part, but spoke nothing of it. The only way you could tell was how his left bicep shook a little to make your hair feel like you were being petted like a cat, but he covered it up by shifting quickly enough to play it off as an attempt to get more comfortable. You pursed your lips. Maybe he felt uncomfortable. You refrained from talking for the moment, letting him mess with your hair for now. It made you feel at ease, although the tenseness in your shoulders gave away your lack of relaxation. From the corner of your eye you could see him slow to a stop in his movements, scooting a bit closer to your side. "What would you do if you could?"

  The question made you pause, head tilting back to expose the bare flesh of your neck and the slight sheen of sweat that formed on the surface like a veil. It wasn't even that hot in here, but since he was an old man and always hated the cold he cranked it up enough to leave you a little damp on the skin. He might've liked it actually; the way it shone in the light brightly to make this messy afterglow on you was priceless. It was odd to think that you weren't just some vivid hallucination he felt when he got like this, that you were a living body with weight and a mind and tangible flesh. Even more so, it was odd to think that you even felt comfortable talking to him about this. Jason didn't deserve this. He was becoming more sure of it as time passed.

  "I don't know. I..." Your brows furrowed, leaving you with your eyes blankly looking to the tv. White noise, a distraction. A distraction from focused thoughts or too much of them. The only time it wasn't helpful was when you were trying to genuinely sort out your thoughts; like writing words on a page, only to have your elbows violently jerked every so often by some outside force to derail you for a few moments. Your joints and muscles felt sore from the day. It had been a long one, and you were pretty sure you needed another swig of the beer that was sitting between your thighs. Grabbing it, you brought the rim of the bottle to your lips, letting it clink against your teeth softly before allowing the burning to go down your throat.

  He was quiet as you did this, letting his hand fall to his lap where the cigarette slowly burned out. "I wouldn't know where to go from here. I mean I have an idea but I don't know if it'll work...", you trailed off, letting your head drop. It took Jason a moment to fully register what you said  but by the time he did he was already splaying his hand out at the back of your scalp. His hands had always been chapped, regardless of whether he was working or not. Always something to keep him busy. Always something to keep his mind off of things. But he didn't feel the anxiety he had before at most things. Now it was a dull undertone of a feeling, a familiar knot in his chest that made his brows furrow together and his mouth pull into a taut line in thought, just as he had now.

  You assumed he was listening intently, but a part of you wished he would feel more than you thought. Simple confusion was easy to decipher, but he seemed more...concerned. Concerned for you. Which seemed like an odd concept right now considering you did most of the worrying. But you didn't question it, and after a few long moments of glaring at the TV screen and letting the slow feeling of sleepiness come over you, you felt the hand leave your scalp to snake around your shoulders.

  This initially caught you off guard, but as soon as you saw that Jason was narrowly avoiding eye contact and lighting another cigarette with his free hand and the stick between his teeth, you found yourself cracking a small but noticeable grin. The bags under your eyes seemed to disappear for a moment as the muscles beneath your cheeks scrunched up. "It's uh... it's gonna be okay, alright?", he said gently enough to hear but not loud enough to echo. You sunk a bit into the mattress and his arm behind your head, head turning lazily in his direction. For a moment he seemed awkward, but at your relaxation into his embrace, you felt his arms soothe a bit under the pressure and revert from their tensed state. "Is it?"

  The teasing question made him avert his eyes even further, finding interest in the wall nearby. But it was noticeable that he was blushing, regardless of the poor lighting in the room. Here- where it smelled like ashes and cleaning products, where the light burned a dying yellow and the mattress creaked under little to no pressure, where the smallness of the room and bolted down furniture made you feel odd and away from home. Here is where you felt the most safe right now. Not with anyone else, not anywhere else. Just here. And as you reached over for the cigarette between his lips to take a drag from it yourself, you watched as the smoke rose to the ceiling and dissipated without another word.

"I'm here for you, Y/n."

<<_E N D_>>

[pestopascal]

how do you go about commissioning someone? i want to but i hear a lot of bad stuff every so often and ive seen you mention certain artists being behind on contact so im not sure what to expect

quite frankly commissioning someone is absolutely terrifying and needs to have a high level of communication from both the person you are commissioning as well as yourself. the one major artist i have said something about and to, turns out, have had a long history of disappearing for months at a time or not being good and running off with money. found out that after i finally got something from one of them, but the other who i’ve been waiting since january on a response from... im emailing every second week and @ ing on twitter constantly by this point considering it was an upfront payment. and like i said about the first one... if commissions are your primary source of income... there is a level of expectation. i know from social media the second one has been involved in a lot of public work and whatnot, which i do support, but all i need is one email to be like “hey sorry im busy with other work”. some people don’t tell you that. or you find out through their tumblr their laptop is broken. it can be very frustrating. or they run donation and commission sale posts in between not doing your commission. so...

and as for you the person commissioning i think people vastly underestimate what you need to provide vs what ppl actually do provide. if you have some specific pose in mind provide photo refs/explain it. you dont need to do a characters backstory, 3 pages, no line breaks. summarise. clear cut on colours and clothing. and if you leave it up to interpretation then you’re gonna end up with something you may have to be like hey sorry lets correct this, which wastes time and effort and money on everyone’s behalf. like spend time going through god like pinterest or whatever to actually source what it is you are looking for. you’d be amazed that people rly to appreciate it, and also esp when artists run limited spots, the ones that are actually providing references and so on are the ones that do get picked because it makes it easier to then provide a higher quality product. its not about remembering urls and favouritism that some people like to claim, its so that they can spend more time on something for you.

that said, commissioning someone and seeing something you have in mind come to life is brilliant. personally i do have a preference for commissioning friends, because well 1) communication (sophia is so good for it), 2) its so funny dropping into the dms like kicking down their door and throwing money at them to draw something for you (something i do to hoiist and daisy regularly) and 3) idk love and support friends!!! (always all of them) also with friends too i do ask people if theyre trying something out like animations, new painting style, etc. if they wanna test on my comm i dont mind because in some instances it also helps them like work out if they wanna use it as an offer on a comm yknow?

when it comes to artists (or writers in some instances) that you dont personally know, if i cant exactly find the information on their tumblr (which happens quite rarely but does happen) i just ask. what do they need. what do they want. also turnaround time. there are people out there with art/writing styles that you do adore, or something specific theyve done in the past you want to almost have recreated for yourself. talk to them! ask if they’re okay redoing like idk a deconstructed helmet or a watercolour tarot card or a 3k word third pov fic revolving around reconnecting 5yrs later (plummmmm).  but like too ask about payments, if you can potentially do half and half (a lot of artists are honestly open to this but you just have to ask), what are their routines like with providing sketches and changes (most tend to have information available on their tumblr but... still), etc etc. and dont be surprised if you ask for some heavy tattooing and jewellery and flowers that the price goes up? ive seen people be genuinely shocked like youre asking for heavy detail... hello.... but communication is key and its also on you to ask and tell the things you want and need.

as for writing commissions, personally, kind of almost in the same boat? if theres a particular scene, a visual reference helps to be like a guiding key to get to that point, but also specific words, like talking about hands, the colour purple. personally too with writing comms i have done, i do sometimes go and search for like oc tags for more visual stuff and then translate it to text. some of my favourite pieces have been exchanges more than commissions, with crashed-down through the dragon age pieces we’ve done, and utilising the tags there. also like i ask if you want the pov to follow someone specific, do you want first, second or third, any particular time of day, etc etc etc. like this does affect tone and flow. also with mine i offer snippets as i move through to see if the phrasing is right, am i doing something appropriate to the character/s, as with art you have the. pose and emotion in one position as such yknow? with writing its a movement and kind of links through it all. if like one sentence is off, the tone could be wrong, and changes everything.

also, if something is out of your price range, i have seen an upswing in people asking that just let someone know. inquire, work it out, but if its too much just politely turn it down. yes, emails get lost and tumblr is notorious for not flagging messages so there can be unintentional ghosting but yeah i think thats a good habit to get into.

tldr; dont be afraid to commission people, seriously, its very rewarding for everyone around. be polite, ask questions, keep on top of the communication. dont be an asshole, be clear about what youre after, be kind, enjoy

[insomnihan]

han’s Entire Thoughts and Feelings on Dreamcatcher’s “Breaking Out”

MY TIME HAS FINALLY COME

ITS TIME FOR ME TO GO CRAZY AAAAAAAAAAA GO STUPID AAAAAAAAAAA ON TEXT POST THE TIME IS NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! FULL SOMNIE MODE ACTIVATED DONT LOOK AT ME (added mv instead so bc there are already TOO MANY pictures)

there are no read mores here so im sorry (im actually gonna apologize this time this is long™) IM GONNA BE VERY SPECIFIC

hella pictures, links, and words youve been warned™

ALRIGHT SO-

THE SONG i think a lot of us would agree that the introduction threw us off (i was also one of those people) but to be honest i dont mind it AT ALL?????? that kinda harmonizing sound during here and here i dunno what that is but i was vibing hard with it i really liked it and yeah it is different from their usual style but once i heaRD THAT GUITAR IT WAS OVER FOR ME I COULDNT- like i wanna bounce but i also wanna headbang at the same time

i mentioned this to gwen @wickymicky tho one thing i would say is i just WISH this song went harder??? i dunno how to describe it exactly but something heavier??? i wish i knew how to elaborate on what that means im sorry but i just know thats what i feel but other than that im very satisfied with this song!!!!!!

yoohyeon starts the song as if i wasnt vibrating with excitement already like her singing voice is just sounds so pleasant???? HIT ME WITH THAT SILENT NIGHT SILENT NIGHT i personally liked this part in the middle and how it built up into the chorus i FELT THAT IN MY BONES

MISS JIU YOUR VOICE its so soft yet powerful just like you GENERALLY LIKE HOW!!!!!!!!! youre literally the second person to sing and you got two things from me: 1. F UCKED UP and 2. my heart........................... like her bridge part just SO PERFECT LIKE YOU DONT UNDERSTAND-

S U A YOU CANT BE KILLING ME WITH NO WAY NO WAY LIKE WERE STILL IN AND THERE WAS NO ONE LEFT just something about her tone.................. im- pairing her with jiu for THIS my heart and my ears, yknow what ALL OF ME is just so happy and ‘you cant stop my heart’ well you sure stopped mine with your voice-

there is SO MUCH DAMI??????? THERE ARE TEARS???? IN MY EYES???? i was shocked to hear her so early on in the song but i welcomed it with open arms i love her deep voice so much her parts were nice (tho a little off as in not very ‘dami-like’ if you will not usual to her parts in their other songs) BUT when she was saying that part with love, lost, and hide it and her part at 2:31.......................... pls.....

HANDONG P L E A S E her parts at 0:40 and 1:39 were small but they sounded SO pleasant im cry!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! a moot of mine mentioned in her tags somewhere about how handong’s voice sounds silky and like...................... thanks for saying it bc youre sO RIGHT like i cant even describe it in depth to yall bc it just makes me feeL GOOD hearing it!!!!!!!!

miss lee gahyeon hitting me with something gentle at 0:44 but then hitting me with this at 1:31 like with handong her parts are small but still impactful!!!! her voice is so nice to listen to like it sounds smooth??? i cant Words™ but yknow what im saying right-

SIYEON I COULD LITERALLY LISTEN TO YOUR VOICE FOREVER her voice for the chorus................ IM CRYING ITS SO CATCHY!!!!!!!!! SO BREAKING OUT OF THE DARK NIGHT is literally stuck in my head i cant- her voice is just SO unique right??? like its so powerful and it jUST H I T S YOU FULL FORCE side note: i found myself waving my hand with her when she sings bye bye thats so dorky of me leave me alone

THE DANCE L I S T E N i was PLANNING on trying my hand at gifs but i was impatient and we all know that pictures WILL NOT do this choreography justice but AS ALWAYS THEY COME THROUGH WITH SOME GOOD ASS CHOREO it doesnt hit as hard as their other dances but that doesnt bother me- there was a lot of Hands™ like a lot of emphasis on the hands and gestures (will mention more later) UUUUUM the dancing during the chorus with so much arm swinging and they all hit the air so hard with their elbows and fists i could really just feel that energy?? like all the effort and power they put into their dancing and to give it their all???? aka i feel tired just watching them dance

two parts i REALLY wanted to gif: 1. when yoohyeon does this with her hands up to 1:30................................... thanks and 2. this part with jiu and sua together................................... thanks x2

BONUS PICTURES:

so this pose is like their thing now right?????? this is from what???? i dunno what this means here but like im glad they have a cool pose that represents them

OKAY TWO THINGS: this was all i could focus on when i watched the teaser like siyeons face as if shes super into this (or was singing i dunno) and then jius face like is it THAT serious-

THE VISUALS ON TOP OF BOMB CHOREO THEY ALSO HAVE BOMB AESTHETICS FOR THEIR VIDEOS!!!!!!!! i would explain EVERY scene but i thought why not show the ones i really liked and put some thoughts under, some are more specifically about how i left looking at them (this is long enough already):

(i must mention beforehand that i loved the part with suas swing and jius rope too but i liked looking at these ones much more)

I KNEW THE MOMENT I SAW ALL THAT RED THREAD IT HAD SOMETHING TO DO WITH FATE like i think actually believe in fate and stuff like that now bc LOOK at them their threads of fate all tangled together and s hit but also i just REALLY wanna see how they pass through the strings lmao

this part was haunting to me??? like i felt suffocated just looking at this??? i dont think thats how i was supposed to feel but this hit

do you see how disorienting???? do you feel that way too???? bc I SURE DID plus i dunno these colors, overlaying her looking in different directions and then at the end when they connect again in the middle my god yes-

okay i said i was going to mention hands and that theyre basically the most important thing in this entire video there are so many scenes of them reaching towards each other, wiggling their fingers and shaking their hands, but unable to even TOUCH you could really F E E L how DESPERATE.......... the WANT and the NEED to just connect together and bicth im gonna cry but its BEAUTIFUL™ (i was gonna add every shot that showed them reaching to each other but this is long enough already)

THIS JUST HITS HARD TO ME

ITS SUPER SYMBOLIC BUT IM TOO BIG STUPID™ TO PUT IT INTO WORDS JUST LOOK. AT. IT.

this is like gahyeons scene but it didnt hurt as much i love the color green but for this scene seeing that wall nearly crushing her and this color together i ACTUALLY felt scared and nauseous and again i dont think thats what im supposed to feel but i did and it also hit she is certainly........................... breaking out sorry

P L E A S E this is the ending and theyre all finally together and i think them standing in a circle and holding hands like is also their thing but do you see?????? yoohyeons smile?????? (im sure theyre all smiling at least i hope so)

T H E M

to the shock of LITERALLY NO ONE they are the seven (7) most beautiful women to walk this earth, so of course i was shaking continuously and my neck was getting broken every second i have nothing to complain about or even REMOTELY MENTION to change anything about them except i want damis shorter length back

plus their outfits and makeup looks are simple and nothing over the top and i think theyre wearing their teaser image outfits in the more colorful scenes but no complaints there like the white outfits when theyre surrounded by the red thread like they look great!!!!!!!!!! just nothing to specify (also their really cool looking earrings they just always have)

(also pls appreciate these screenshots they all come from a split second within their individual shots instead of the shots from the beginning bc i love making my job harder for no reason looking good as hell it took forever to get them okay moving on-)

JIU

someone pls tell me how she could make her face so intense...................... pls i thought i was gonna get turned into stone any second with how threatened i felt seeing her i just about died with all those damn close ups she got im TOO TIRED miss kim minji if looks could kill............................ her white dress was longer on one side so its lowkey just one leg and her shoulders out pls- that scene with the purple background and the rope and her eyes are purple too and just FULL of threatening energy....................................... dont hurt me

SUA

COME👏THE👏F UCK👏ON👏

ALL INSOMNIAS AGREE SHES A WHOLE MEAL™ this hairstyle and color on her specifically like this picture and its wavy i wish she could just keep that forever but yknow and that white dress shes wearing in this picture too with the sleeves pls you BEAUTIFUL BIH- her hair has a smaller pony tail in the red dance scenes and a whole pony tail for the swing i just wish i could see those styles better and I KNOW its a swing and the shot has to be far away but thanks for her side profile there im just saying-

SIYEON

THIS WOMAN™ this exact look with her hair straight and the one black glove and the one long sleeve that s hit hurted me and when they were dancing in the kinda red (i think its red) scenes shes wearing pants so good for her to stay on her brand plus i mentioned the green scenes earlier and she is THE Actress™ shes literally so stunning i had a hard time getting this screenshot bc i just kept looking and NOT doing this, her Power™ truly i finish with mentioning the eyebrow thing at the same part as bye bye................................. thank you

HANDONG

YALL ALREADY KNOW HOW IT BE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

THIS WOMAN IS THE MOST BEAUTIFUL WOMAN IVE EVER LAID MY EYES ON!!!!!!!!!!!!!! the first couple of close up shots she got I DIED AT THOSE TIMES SHES SO ETHEREAL i will NEVER get over this hairstyle on her EVER and her hairstyle for that one dance outfit here like CAN WE JUST ALL AGREE that she just almost always looks Expensive™ and Princess™ like whenever we see her bc i cant deal!!!!!!!!! and i DID see her wearing that lavender outfit from her teaser image when that dropped during these scenes like i understand its supposed to be far away to express distance between others and how gloomy it is like that but i wanna see- ANYWAY I LOVE HER

YOOHYEON

let me just start out with how HAPPY AND THRILLED I AM that she has grey hair again like THATS HER LOOK™ shes also very good at being intense and powerful and that breaks every bone in my body but i had accepted it i wanna specify her little snarl hit me harder than it shouldve it lasted for literally a second she had the wavy hair too during those green yellow (???) and red scenes which i have to say AGAIN i wanna see it better but i understand why i finish this with her smile at the end i must mention it again pls my uwus-

DAMI

im sorry i need to start with full on wishing her hair was still that shorter length i miss that so much- ANYWAY this color on her F A N T A S T I C™ like this look with the black around her shoulders and she has a shorter dress instead of the long on one side like siyeon she was also wearing pants during those red dance scenes and honestly thanks im not even going to mention her scenes with handong again yall already know i wanna see it better

GAHYEON

LOOK AT HER she didnt have a lot of screentime like this picture comes from her first singing part and it was blurry but yknow that was aesthetic bc it focused eventually so ill let it slide literally she just has long black hair but she looks absolutely GORGEOUS in this mv!!!!!!!! i just wanted to see her more at all!!!!!!!! shes just so pretty and she got to have that cool scene with the plastic but like GIVE👏ME👏MORE👏GAHYEON👏NEXT👏TIME👏

LIKE i keep reminding myself that this IS a japanese song and i expected the style to be different so i guess thats why im not TOO critical about it i can totally hear how someone could be not so into it like that beginning part which doesnt sound like a dreamcatcher song if you didnt it was them yknow what i mean??? at least thats how i see it BUT PERSONALLY this is a pretty solid song!!!!!! ive been listening to it for two days straight and im feeling G R E A T!!!!!!!!!

IN CONCLUSION: GUESS WHOS GOING TO LISTEN TO THIS (AND THE WHOLE ALBUM) ON LOOP FOR WEEKS ON END YUP THATS ME

bonus bc i had to make this:

[littlemisssquiggles]

RWBY Musings #63: The Sleeping Prince. What if…Oscar falls into a deep sleep for the Merging of the Two Souls?

‘Sup FNDM fam! Happy New Year from the squiggle meister! For my first theory post of 2019, since Oscar is a perfect little prince now (hypothetically speaking), consider this for a sec. 

What if...for the Merge, Oscar suddenly falls unconscious, putting him out of commotion for when the heroes begin to commence their plan to commandeer an Atlesian airship with the group unsure of what to do to wake him back up.

As Jaune said last episode, they're not leaving for Atlas without Oscar. But what would they do if the Merge suddenly happens and he’s temporarily unable to aid them with their plan for Atlas?

In the fairy tales, it's usually a kiss of true love that awakes the sleeping princesses from their eternal slumber. If Oscar is expected to fall to sleep during the Merge (because I honestly can't picture him being conscious while unceremoniously merging), imagine if… it's love that ultimately wakes him up. Not necessarily from a kiss per say but I have this little hunch where Oscar will start to merge with Ozpin but it’s the love he feels both for and from the teammates he’s grown to care about that keeps him from resisting the part of the process that’s meant to make him disappear entirely; if that makes sense.

Remember the God of Light’s warning to Ozma before his first reincarnation? He told him that where he sought comfort, he will only find pain. In a sense, you can say the God of Light’s heed to Ozma happened twice within the cycle. For Ozma it occurred in his first reincarnation as Diggs after Salem, the former love of his life---the mother of his children---the woman he had refused the peace of the afterlife to return to, killed him with her very own hands as a final sign that she had lost herself to the darkness.

And for Ozpin, it was recently when his own allies turned their backs on him after promising they wouldn’t upon learning the truth. The first deceit came from Lionheart, a friend and member of Oz’s very own inner circle of trusted lieutenants. The second came from the group of young heroes whose lives he had promised to protect and guide. Even Qrow, a former student and long-time friend of Oz who completely devoted to him, turned his back to him and it is his words that made the old wizard turn to grief and isolation for the third time in his many lives (counting Ambroise and Emmanuel---the second and third reincarnations).

Who knows? Perhaps this will be a sign that Oscar is potentially doomed to meet the same fate being challenged by that same love and comfort in others that has left his predecessors crushed by grief? I’m not saying that the heroes will hurt Oscar (at least, not now after what transpired when they thought he went missing). But I can somehow imagine Oscar meeting a dishevelled and grief-stricken Ozpin again within his mental mind palace or Dreamscape and having the older soul mock his young successor for getting himself attached to the love and comfort he feels from the heroes. Imagine…that love and trust is what Oscar will hold onto as a lifeline to keep him from losing himself completely to the Merge?

While I’m aware that Oscar has come to accept his fate now, I can’t help but still feel like that’s all a front from Oscar. It could be just my interpretation, though. It’s just the way how he spoke in V6 C8 gave me the impression that Oscar had technically given up on wanting to resist the Merge while subtly foreshadowing that it could happen this same volume.

“…These past few days, I’ve been scared of the same things you were. I don’t know how much longer I’m going to be…me. But I did some thinking and I do know that I want to do everything I can to help with whatever time I have left…”

It wouldn’t surprise me if in a later episode; Oscar does begin the Merge with Ozpin and will reunite with him in his mind for it. Don’t want to anticipate too much but it is a strong possibility of it happening especially since they do have the model of Professor Ozpin. I doubt they just made that for the opening. I feel like Oscar is going to meet Ozpin face to face in his mind and when he does, I think the two souls will have a confrontation that could either be just them standing around and talking (like Raven and Yang in the V5 finale) or end in them literally squaring off against each other in an all-out showdown. We’ve already seen two Maidens duke it out.

Will we get to see the two souls fight next?

I would think we should since it’s something that’s been foreshadowed since the first volume. I love the idea of Oscar literally fighting the Merge. Fighting Ozpin and fighting against losing himself. The thing that has always been hinted about the Man with Two Souls is them fighting for control. So maybe this will be part of the Merge? Oscar fighting against Ozpin for the chance to remain as himself.

We know Oscar has accepted disappearing one day but...what if… it's the love he feels from the team that convinces him he needs to fight to be himself. What if...Ruby shares another Rosebuds bonding moment with Oscar where she basically tells him to fight to be him. And since these words come from the girl we know Oscar greatly admires, it’ll hold a lot of weight and meaning in Oscar’s eyes.  

I didn’t particularly like how Oscar told everyone that he was going to disappear soon and everyone was…I guess, so clouded by their relief of him being safe to feel the full weight of his words in that moment.

I just found the fact that there is Oscar basically talking to group like he’s going to technically sort of die soon (I mean it pretty much had that final farewell sort of tone to it, for sure) and everyone is all happy smiles. Like…what? Why are you smiling? Yes, this is a happy moment but what’s being said and foreshadowed isn’t so…again why didn’t we get the characters briefly looking unhappy when Oscar brought disappearing only to perk up when he showed them that even though it’s bad, he’s still determined to do his best like the best boy he is? I dunno. It was a little weird moment for me and one of my gripes with this episode.

I think eventually when things simmer down and once the Merge actually legit starts happening before the team’s very eyes where Oscar gets down because of the Merge, that’s when the others will start to see the light of the child’s words and begin to truly panic about losing him.

Another thing that needs to be addressed are the group’s feelings now about Ozpin. Following the events of C5-C9 and now that Oscar has become an official valued member of the group (as himself), how does the group feel about Oz? This is why I found the happy-go-lucky smiles when Oscar mentioned disappearing for good to be off putting. The group do realize that if Oscar disappears for good, technically that could spell the team being back with Ozpin…kind of…sort of…maybe-ish. I dunno. I just want to know how the group feel about Oz now? Did Oscar’s disappearance also help them to forgive Ozpin too?

I don’t think that is the case which is why I hope it gets addressed in the remaining 5 episodes.

Overall, I just want Oscar to fight to be himself you guys. This is just my opinion here but personally, Oscar has been way too accepting of his fate. I understand that merging with Ozpin is a destiny that Oscar can’t run from. I understand that fully but…I still feel like he should want to fight to be himself if he could help it y’know what I mean? I don’t know if that’s possible or if it’s impossible for Oscar to not fight against losing himself. But nevertheless, I just want Oscar to fight to be him and for someone to tell him to fight to be him. Because Oscar is pretty great.

Plus I think that’ll be the be all end all to both Oscar and Ozpin’s conjoined stories, right? Either Ozpin’s run will conclude this volume and Oscar will take his place on the cast moving forward as his successor, now complete with his memories, knowledge, skills and magical capabilities (hopefully) while still retaining his personality.

So picture …Oscar accepting his fate but also fighting it at the same time. He wants to be a Wizard of Light like the others before him. He still wants to do everything in his power to fight to protect humanity and stop Salem once and for all. But he will not lose himself. So ...rather than Ozpin absorbing Oscar and his mind becoming dominant, it's the opposite where Ozpin becomes a part of Oscar while the former farm boy still gets to be himself.

Basically what some fans have been saying since the beginning that Oz will disappear and become a part of Oscar with our Barn Prince still remaining as himself but gaining all the memories and skills of Ozpin and all the Wizards before him.

Or…Oscar and Ozpin will fuse and this new fusion will be a perfect blend of them both signifying a perfect alignment between the two soul where it doesn’t feel like one has eclipsed the other. It’s both but at the same time it’s not them. Someone entirely new who is as much Oscar as the original while still having some essence of Ozpin in there.

Whatever the outcome, I do think the Merge could be a plot point set for the final few episodes of V6. Emphasis on could. But if it does happen, only then will Oscar’s true fate be decided once and for all. Either that or it gets delayed and Oscar goes into the Atlas Arc now fighting against Ozpin to let the Merge fully take him over. Who knows?

That's just me. Don’t know if you guys would agree or disagree. But anyways, as always, these are just my thoughts and theories. I guess we’ll see what the Writers got cooking for us when C10 premieres this Saturday.

More Squiggles’ RWBY Content

~LittleMissSquiggles (2019)